Episode Transcript
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Emily Barbosa (00:00):
And there was a book that I read that
actually one of my professors gave to me,
and it was called Personality Isn't
Permanent by Benjamin Hardy, and I love
Benjamin Hardy books it's so good and it
just, oh my God, that was one of the
catalysts to me working through my trauma
(00:20):
and it just gave me such a different
perspective of I can be whoever I want to
be.
I can walk into a room and introduce myself
as hi, I'm Emily, I'm a therapist, I love
running, I live in St Pete, I have my dog,
kylo.
Instead of like, hi, my name is Emily, and
like I was abused as a child and I have all
this trauma and I'm broken and like I'm
(00:42):
doomed because that's how I felt for so
long.
Hilary Russo (00:44):
I felt like people could look at me and see
that like I'm broken and that there was
something wrong with me that's a really
good point because I think in this day and
age, trauma has become a buzzword
everywhere and, while we have the big T's
and the little t's, it's encouraging people
that, yes, we have trauma and it probably
(01:07):
and doesn't ever go away.
It's building a relationship with it,
understanding it and being able to say that
this thing happened but it's not happening
right, and build that, that love and that
relationship with that part of ourselves
that we're able to cultivate a new,
healthier relationship with ourselves.
Emily Barbosa (01:27):
really, you know, it's about, yeah, killing
parts of ourselves more than trying to
change anyone else yes, yes, I love what
you said of like building a relationship
with that part, because for so long I think
I hated that part of myself that felt
abandonment and shame and guilt and
embarrassment, like I didn't like her, and
(01:49):
it was hard for me to have empathy for her
and to work through that because it kind of
I just hated it so much and I hated that it
happened and there was a lot of acceptance.
That needed to happen for me to get there.
And that book just helped me see that I
actually am in control of the rest of my
life and I can take responsibility for my
(02:11):
future and I can let this stuff go and how
I remember it and perceive it and tell the
story.
It's really just narrative therapy.
The whole book is like narrative therapy
and just rewrite your story.
Like how do you want to introduce yourself?
Who do you want to be in the future?
Like I want to be a business owner one day.
I want to write books, I want to do TED
(02:33):
Talks, I want to make an impact, I want to
be a successful woman in this industry and
maybe changing the word to what does that
look like?
Hilary Russo (02:47):
Change the word to I will, right, I will, I
will, I am, are right, it's the I am.
I'm here a little coaching while we're
doing our our interview here, because it's
it's, it's really.
You're in that process and I.
The one reason why I loved our connection
is because I see parts of myself in you and
where I was at your age.
But I don't think we were talking about so
much of mental health publicly and openly
(03:08):
when I was in my 20s.
And so when I am with my students or anyone
that's in their 20s, navigating through
life, trying to figure out where they're
going to go next, I get so excited because
I'm like, oh my gosh, they are so much
further ahead than I was when I was in my
20s because we didn't have these
conversations.
So it's empowering to hear someone who is
(03:31):
just starting out on this journey, really
in a career, really choosing to be the
architect of their own life.
And especially, I get even more jazzed when
I know that they want to go into this field.
Especially, I get even more jazzed when I
know that they want to go into this field
because there's so much we can do to create
a community, a world where a collective,
where we're helping each other on this
(03:52):
process, you know, and it's exciting, so
I'm just excited for you because I know
it's, it's, it's the journey that's just in
process.
Emily Barbosa (04:00):
And it's beautiful yeah.