April 30, 2025 • 54 mins
In this inspiring episode, Tracy Christian shares her remarkable journey from navigating the entertainment industry to co-founding her talent agency, TCA. Tracy discusses the pivotal moments that shaped her career, from leveraging early opportunities to overcoming fears and societal barriers. She explores the concept of faith and its role in her decision-making process, emphasizing the power of perseverance and the importance of moving forward despite uncertainties. Tracy also delves into the personal and professional support systems that bolstered her success, highlighting the significance of taking bold actions and dreaming big. Join us for this motivating conversation that underscores the impact of faith, hard work, and embracing one's true potential.
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Sanika is a storyteller, communicator, and creator passionate about exploring self-discovery, culture, and the power of words. With a background in technology and marketing communications; she has built a platform dedicated to authentic conversations that inspire growth, challenge perspectives, and amplify voices.
As the host of How Do You Divine?, she invites listeners to redefine meaning, embrace transformation, and navigate life—one word at a time. Her mission? To create space for reflection, empowerment, and deeper connections through storytelling.
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Transcript
Episode Transcript
Available transcripts are automatically generated. Complete accuracy is not guaranteed.
Speaker 2 (00:00):
Hi.
Thank you for having me.
Speaker (00:01):
Listen, we had to make this happen because I feel like
who you are and your story isreally aspiring, right.
But I also feel like throughoutyour journey, you've, you've
learned so much that ourcommunity can grow from.
Speaker 2 (00:15):
First of all, I want everyone to know.
How this came, not just how thiscame about, but we are in the
back of a restaurant, right Whenwe finish this meeting, this
dialogue, she's gonna hop in mycar.
I'm driving her to the airport.
We're in Los Angeles.
She lives across the country.
The idea that you live in NewYork, you were out here on
(00:37):
business.
Yep.
We met.
Before her flight takes off fromla Yes.
I love how flexible Johnny onthe spot she's got her
equipment.
Yes.
Listen,
Speaker (00:48):
I always say I don't have to get ready.
I stay ready.
Night shift
Speaker 2 (00:52):
a word.
Okay.
I don't to a total word.
She's not lying.
Speaker (00:56):
Listen, I have my three camera points set up.
You guys are gonna see and enjoythis interview, but I don't, she
Speaker 2 (01:01):
showed me her setup.
I am impressed.
Okay.
I am impressed.
Speaker (01:07):
Thank you.
Because I also think that wethink there's so many barriers
for entry to, to create a brandand to show up in the world in
the way that you want to.
Where most of that is in ourhead.
Right.
And.
I think you're gonna walk usthrough that today by sharing
how the definition of fair haschanged over the course of your
life.
But ultimately, I do things likethis to show people that if
(01:30):
there is a crack in the door,baby, I'm busting in waving a
fall.
Fall.
Like I'm not, I'm want to alwaysshow up as my full self.
Am I always like a hundredpercent prepared?
No.
But am I also a hundred percentqualified?
Absolutely.
And I move off of that,
Speaker 2 (01:47):
you know, there's an old saying that says 90% of
success is showing up.
Speaker 3 (01:51):
Mm.
Speaker 2 (01:51):
And um, the person who can figure out how to show
up Yeah.
Always wins.
Speaker (01:59):
Aw,
Speaker 2 (02:00):
always.
Speaker (02:01):
Thank you.
Speaker 2 (02:01):
Yeah.
Speaker (02:02):
Say thank you.
And so for me, that's what I'malways like, I don't wanna, if
there is a barrier, it won't beme.
If there's a barrier, it won'tbe me.
So tell us more about you, youragency, your clothing line.
Who is Tracy Christian?
Speaker 2 (02:17):
So I have a talent agency called TCA and we
represent mostly actors, butproducers, writers, directors.
We have a styling division, um,and we've been in business now.
For almost 17 years.
Mm-hmm.
Um, and it's been fantastic.
Um, how did I get into theentertainment industry?
(02:39):
Yeah.
So I was friends with a directornamed John Singleton.
Uh, and I was very close to, youknow, his assistant, uh, Joe
Doherty, and we were just kindof hanging out one day and I
said, Hey, graduating college,what do you guys think I would
be good at?
What should I do for a living?
And John said, you should eitherbe a madam or an agent.
Speaker (03:01):
What a swing.
Speaker 2 (03:03):
What a swing.
Right.
And I thought, okay, I look cuteand orange, but I don't wanna
wear it all the time.
Speaker (03:08):
You know?
So I don't want my man, my billsplaying for me.
Speaker 2 (03:11):
Right?
So, uh, maybe I'll do this agentthing.
And John was, you know, verypopular at the time.
Yeah.
Um.
Uh, boys in the hood had justcome out, so he arranged a
meeting for me and, uh, at hisagency, CAA and, and I knew that
I could get a position therejust because of who John was,
(03:33):
you know?
Right.
Like in the mail room orsomething.
Yes.
But I used the leverage, I ucaa's interest to get leverage
around town and I found anagency that I thought was.
Oh, okay.
I found an agency that I thoughtI would be able to learn the
business and would promote mebecause in being an agent, it's
(03:56):
like an apprenticeship position.
Yeah.
You need that agent that youwork for to give you access to
their connections and theirtalent and
Speaker (04:06):
in order to establish yourself.
Right.
Yeah.
Speaker 2 (04:08):
So, uh, so I found an agency and it was this.
You know, bicoastal boutiqueagency that had a lot of
classically trained actors.
I was working with, you know, onthe director side, like David
Mamet was calling the office.
Martin Scorsese's company wascalling the office.
Like so at that level.
Yeah.
And actors like Lindsay Kraus,um, Joe Montia, blah, blah, you
(04:31):
know, Rebecca Pigeon.
And, uh, that's how I built myaesthetic.
Yeah, that's how I was trained.
Um, I was going to the theaterevery week.
Nice.
Uh, yeah, that's, I
Speaker (04:43):
love that.
But it also sounds like you,you, you got direction and you
took it and you ran with it.
Right.
Speaker 2 (04:51):
So that's why when you asked me and I said the word
fear.
Yeah.
Right.
So then I was young and naiveand stupid.
I didn't know enough to beafraid of entertainment or this
position or anything like that.
Yeah.
I just thought like, I am young,I'm smart.
(05:11):
I will be an asset to wherever Igo.
Yes.
Um, no one will be able tooutwork me.
I may not have, you know, adegree or a credential in this
field, but I'm that girl.
Like, I'll stay there tillmidnight, you know, figuring it
out.
I'm willing do
Speaker 4 (05:27):
the work.
Yeah.
Yeah.
Speaker 2 (05:27):
I'm willing to do the work and in a year.
Speaker 4 (05:30):
Yep.
Speaker 2 (05:31):
Now they'll promote.
Now, I mean, I didn't know.
I didn't know what I didn'tknow.
Yes.
But, uh, that
Speaker (05:36):
hard work sometimes does not equate to promotions.
Right.
I tell people that all the time.
Speaker 2 (05:40):
Hard work.
Hard work is not enough.
Speaker (05:42):
Yes.
It is not.
Speaker 2 (05:43):
Hard work is not enough.
And
Speaker (05:44):
sometimes you've just become hard work
Speaker 2 (05:46):
and sometimes Oh, I love that.
I, especially women.
Speaker (05:49):
Yes.
Speaker 2 (05:50):
Especially women.
I
Speaker (05:51):
just had this conversation that unfortunately
when you become a really gooddoer,
Speaker 2 (05:57):
that's what people want from you
Speaker (05:59):
and you just, your whole existence will be
Speaker 2 (06:01):
doing,
Speaker (06:02):
doing,
Speaker 2 (06:03):
doing.
So, um, but I was promoted, youknow, very early and, uh, was
able to establish a list formyself and just grew my own book
of business from there.
And, and by and large, like theblack community in
entertainment, they were reallysupportive.
Speaker (06:25):
Nice.
My That's really good though.
Speaker 2 (06:27):
Yeah.
My first client was a guy namedand I still represent him to
this day.
Nice.
So that was 30 something years,38.
Years ago.
Mm-hmm.
Uh, Roger Veer Smith, and he hadjust won the Peabody Award for
doing his play a Huey p Newtonstory.
Nice.
And he was in like all theseSpike Lee films.
And, and Roger was like, he'sabout about it.
(06:49):
Yeah.
Right.
Like he's, yeah.
If we want black people inHollywood, it's just not in
front of the camera.
It's behind the camera.
And you vote with your dollars.
Yes.
So, and listen,
Speaker (07:00):
that's why we boycotting all these things
right now, right?
That's why we not, that's, lemmejust grab this phone.
I just didn't stop you and yourthoughts.
No,
Speaker 2 (07:06):
no, no.
It's why we're not in target.
Speaker (07:09):
This is exactly why we're not in target.
Speaker 2 (07:11):
So Roger left William Morris, which for those people
who don't know, is a very, veryestablished.
You know, agency and mm-hmm.
Prestigious agency and he signedwith me.
Speaker (07:22):
Nice.
Speaker 2 (07:23):
And I think I was still an assistant or like a
junior agent at the time when he
Speaker (07:26):
did that.
Yeah.
But also he took, he, he sawsomething.
Speaker 2 (07:30):
I think he, yeah, look, I think he saw something,
but I also think that's who heis.
Like he's not about lip service.
Speaker 4 (07:37):
Oh, he's about action.
Speaker 2 (07:38):
He's about the revolution.
Nice.
Right.
And so he's like, look, here's ayoung sister.
She's trying to do her thing.
I have a manager.
I have an attorney, so they'regonna make sure she doesn't do
anything, you know?
Crazy.
Crazy.
Exactly right.
They gonna keep
Speaker (07:51):
it in a guard rail, essentially, right?
Yes.
Speaker 2 (07:54):
But how, who's gonna, if we don't invest in our tribe,
who's gonna do it?
Who's gonna do it?
And because I had Roger, youknow, I could get my phone calls
returned.
Yes.
And I just built upon that.
Speaker (08:08):
So tell me, how did fair show up at this time?
Right, because you, you have.
You were so fortunate to have acommunity of people that were
like, Tracy, I see you.
I value, you have somethingimpactful to the world.
Right.
Tell me how, although you hadthis sense of reaffirming and
validation around you, you stillwere I know, you know, fear
still existed there, but you,one thing you must give yourself
(08:29):
credit for is you kept moving.
I did.
But how was, how did Fair showup in that season?
Speaker 2 (08:34):
Oh my gosh.
So.
The world.
I mean, we all know theexpression, the glass ceiling.
Speaker 3 (08:41):
Yep.
Speaker 2 (08:42):
I think when you're young, black and female, there's
the mythos.
Everybody says they want to helpyou.
Yeah.
And they will help you untilthey don't.
Right.
Until they feel like, like atthat point I was not
competition.
Speaker 3 (08:59):
Yeah.
Speaker 2 (08:59):
Right.
So people were like, oh yeah,come in, whatever.
But.
A lot of people didn't know howsmart I was or how hard that I
was prepared to work or howstrategic I could be and I was
having fun at it.
And if you're a person whonaturally is playing chess
(09:24):
instead of checkers, ugh, thatscares people.
Speaker (09:28):
It does it Totally understand.
So the stop, because I'm that,so the help
Speaker 2 (09:33):
stops.
Speaker (09:33):
It's not, and it's not just that the help stops they
all, they then become fearful.
Because what I've learned over,I always say my short years of
here in life, but long in a way,is that people find comfort and
predictability.
Speaker 2 (09:48):
Of course.
I, who, who doesn't.
Right?
That's, that's mankind.
This is right.
So
Speaker (09:55):
that's why I always say it's easy for people to take
humans as their parents.
Right.
You're pretty, you're this,you're ugly.
You're that I put you in a box.
I know this, I know how to, yes.
And that level of predictabilitycomforts them.
But once you start to show up ina world
Speaker 2 (10:12):
that they were not prepared for and you start
unusual
Speaker 4 (10:15):
that box, they're like, hold on now.
Hold on, hold on.
Hold, hold on, hold on, hold on,hold on, hold on, hold on.
I don't know if I'm ready tosupport no more because she, she
outside the box.
Speaker 2 (10:25):
And when I tried to put her back in the box, she, oh
my,
Speaker 4 (10:29):
she ain't really, wouldn't she?
She, she
Speaker 2 (10:31):
fighting back.
Yes.
And she kind of hurting,
Speaker (10:34):
bruise, bruised me up.
Yes.
But that's interesting.
So how did you deal with thatfear in that time when it was
like, oh, young sister, she'sstarting her agency.
There's people, her, well, Ididn't even start the
Speaker 2 (10:46):
agency yet.
I was still just working
Speaker (10:47):
for ca In
Speaker 2 (10:48):
the, in the system?
No, I was at a agency called.
Uh, I won't even, they don'teven deserve name.
They don't deserve the name.
But, but no.
But, uh, you was
Speaker (10:56):
at another agency and you, you still had that support,
right?
And people were supporting youuntil,
Speaker 2 (11:01):
until, so, um, I learned how to be aggressive.
I learned how to do my jobwithout scaring people.
And I think that's a thing thatwomen learn and thankfully, your
generation is unlearning.
Yes.
Like you guys just show up.
Yes.
And you guys show up with theidea that your emotional
(11:24):
emotions are not my concern.
Right.
Those are
Speaker (11:27):
your bags to hold girl.
Right.
Speaker 2 (11:29):
And And we were very different.
We were like, okay, I need tomove in such a way that this man
doesn't feel threatened.
Yes.
So that he will continue tosupport me.
Right.
Speaker (11:42):
Absolutely.
I have family members thatstruggle with that to this day
because I think it's like, it'salso we got good at condition.
Well, we
Speaker 2 (11:47):
got good at it.
No, and right.
You don't wanna give it up ifyou good at it.
Speaker (11:51):
And it's conditioning.
Speaker 2 (11:53):
Absolutely.
It's
Speaker (11:53):
conditioning from what?
Like what my aunts and mygrandparents, like that
generation told you.
Like, show up and do what youneed to do, but don't get in the
way.
Speaker 2 (12:01):
Don't get in the way pacify like whatever
methodology.
You had Yeah.
To make the, to make yoursupervisor feel like promoting
you was gonna benefit him.
Speaker (12:14):
Yeah.
Speaker 2 (12:14):
Right.
That's what you cultivated.
Speaker (12:17):
And then I think what our generation has learned from
that is Dennis abuse.
Well,
Speaker 2 (12:22):
it's always abuse, you know?
Speaker (12:24):
That is abuse.
It's, it's always abuse.
It's like, you know what I mean?
But like, like you said, theyhelp you until they don't.
Right.
And then how did you, how didyou pivot?
How did you manage during thattime when they were like, oh
shit.
She, she out here playing chessnot check is, so when
Speaker 2 (12:39):
I, my check is I, by that time, Iran, I
Speaker (12:41):
transitioned out,
Speaker 2 (12:42):
moved to a different agency.
Speaker 3 (12:43):
Okay.
Speaker 2 (12:44):
But, and when I felt that glass ceiling again.
And really not knowing what todo.
The Lord took over.
Speaker 3 (12:51):
Nice
Speaker 2 (12:52):
because I did, I'd said to myself, okay, so I have
this opportunity to move to UTAor to move to another large
agency, but I know it's gonna bemore of the same.
Is this just gonna be my lot inlife?
Speaker (13:06):
Is this the journey of the nation?
Yes.
Yeah.
Mm-hmm.
Speaker 2 (13:09):
So this is being totally transparent.
So, um, a girlfriend approachedme and she's like, well, you
should come work with us.
And she was at a styling agency.
They represented hairstylists,makeup artists.
And I said, um, yeah, my clientsare like pretty successful
actors.
They do not wanna be at anagency that represents
(13:29):
hairstylists.
Speaker (13:30):
Yeah.
Right.
Speaker 2 (13:31):
Like that's not gonna happen.
Yeah.
Speaker (13:33):
And it's not gonna align with the brand that you've
already established.
Speaker 2 (13:36):
Yeah.
Not gonna happen.
So she said, um, well maybe myboss would be interested in
creating a separate agency.
Speaker (13:45):
Oh, based on your clientele.
Right.
Speaker 2 (13:48):
So I said, okay, you know, whatever.
So I talked to her guy over thephone and we had like a five
minute conversation and then hesaid, okay, well when I come to
LA we'll get together.
Yeah.
So he, true.
He came to LA and we sat downand had dinner and I picked like
the total wrong place to takehim because I couldn't think of
(14:09):
anything.
And then he said, um, okay, solet's do this.
And he goes, I'm gonna be backout here and we'll drop all the,
you know, do all the things.
And I was like, okay, whatever.
Look, I'm, I'm in Hollywood.
People say that they're gonna do
Speaker (14:26):
things, that everything, listen, I hear about
that Hollywood life.
They'll look at your face and belike.
Speaker 2 (14:32):
Not only in Hollywood, but LA is a place
where they yes you to death.
Speaker (14:35):
They're just so funny
Speaker 2 (14:36):
to me, New York is a place like, no, I don't like
you.
We'll never do business.
They're keeping
Speaker (14:40):
it a buck with you.
We gonna let you know.
You probably never gonna see meagain.
New Yorkers.
Speaker 2 (14:44):
Yeah.
New Yorkers are verystraightforward.
Right?
I know.
Speaker (14:47):
That's why I think LA's so funny to me.
I find it so comical and I hatethat people are always like.
Why do you take these things asjokes?
They are not jokes, but I'mlike, it's funny because they
believe that I believe them.
So then it's funny.
Speaker 2 (14:59):
Oh, okay.
In that case, yeah.
Then it is funny.
But yeah, LA tends to get yes.
You to death.
Yes.
So, um, yeah.
So I didn't pay any, you know,attention.
Oh,
Speaker (15:07):
so you were like, mm-hmm.
This is a good me in here.
I ain't Right.
Never go ahead for the managain.
Speaker 2 (15:12):
Right.
So I've now I've met this guy,I've spoken to him three times.
I've met him twice.
Yeah.
And this like, the second timewe met, he had, um.
I'd printed out my client listand did everything, you know,
appropriate, although I didn't,I didn't know, and he said,
okay, I didn't really look overwhat you sent me.
(15:33):
And he said, how much money doyou need to make as a salary?
Okay.
And how much money do you thinkwe can make?
And I said, well, if you look atpage two of the perspective, you
know that he said, yeah.
Speaker (15:44):
If you look page two, the proposal that I sent you
last week and ahead of thismeeting.
Right.
Which you didn't read, but I'lltalk you through it right now.
Sure.
Yeah.
So
Speaker 2 (15:51):
he said, he goes, just tell me.
And I said, yeah.
And he goes, all right, so whendo you wanna start?
And I was like, excuse me,excuse
Speaker 4 (15:58):
me, sir.
Speaker 2 (15:58):
And Port.
And he said, yeah, let's start.
Why don't you give notice?
And.
And that's when it got scary andI went back to the Lord and I
had all of these conditions,like, okay, the office has to be
in this kind of place and looklike this and this, and all of
these things.
'cause I said to God, I am tooold to start over.
Speaker 3 (16:20):
Oh,
Speaker 2 (16:20):
okay.
You hear all these horrorstories about, you know, you
trusted this business partner.
They ran away with the money, orthe money ran out or mm-hmm.
You know, all very human things.
Speaker 3 (16:30):
Yeah.
Yeah,
Speaker 2 (16:31):
I'm too old to go through that.
Yes.
And I take care of my mother andthis has to be for real.
So like Jed chased me around forprobably, I don't know how many
months
Speaker (16:45):
telling
Speaker 2 (16:45):
me to start.
Let's start.
Let's start.
Let's start.
Speaker (16:47):
What was the hesitation?
Everything afraid of like itbeing real.
What, like what was the fear?
Yeah.
No, I wasn't
Speaker 2 (16:52):
afraid of it being real.
I was afraid of it being notreal and um, I'd never.
I'd never done something of thislevel before this magnitude.
Right.
And to my knowledge, I didn'treally know any women who owned
an agency, much less, any blackwomen.
(17:14):
Usually, um, when people startagencies, it's, they get a big,
you know,$50 million investmentfrom some fund or something.
And of course, they're white menand.
They start an agency with somelinchpin clients, like Yeah.
When you start an agency, youdon't start an agency with
George Clooney.
(17:34):
Yeah.
You start an agency with TomCruise, Brad Pitt.
George Clooney.
Matt Damon.
Yeah.
You start and Ben Affleck.
Speaker (17:41):
Yeah.
You should start with thecollective.
Speaker 2 (17:44):
Yeah.
You start with 200 million, 300million million in billing.
Speaker (17:50):
Oh, right.
Yes.
And.
So it was it.
This is all new.
It's like how do I start what?
I think it was all wrong.
Yes,
Speaker 2 (17:58):
it was all wrong.
But I
Speaker (17:59):
always say, I always kind of boil things down to
simple math.
Right.
One plus one makes two.
Speaker 2 (18:03):
Mm-hmm.
Speaker (18:04):
And, but it also reminds me that we need to know
when operating the word in, indivine order with God, he does
not operate in simple math.
Speaker 2 (18:14):
Okay.
So my girlfriends at church.
Yeah.
Were all telling me to moveforward.
And I had all the confirmationin the universe and I was angry
about it because I just feltlike these people don't
understand.
Yeah.
You know?
And there's nobody in my churchthat operates a hundred million
dollars business, even a$10million business business.
Speaker (18:37):
So they don't know the risk they trying to tell me to
take.
Right.
Speaker 2 (18:39):
They're trying to like, am I gonna live at your
house?
If it exactly fails, if me andmy mama
Speaker (18:43):
gonna be in your guest room, like
Speaker 2 (18:46):
right.
Speaker (18:47):
If this fails,
Speaker 2 (18:47):
and if these clients that I have decide to leave me
or they're poached or Yeah.
Whatever,
Speaker (18:53):
what happens.
Yeah.
If the worst, the worst happens,worst happens.
Happens.
What
Speaker 2 (18:57):
happens.
Yeah.
Um, so yeah.
How did
Speaker (19:01):
you navigate that fear I had, because that's real.
Speaker 2 (19:03):
Had a ton.
A real world.
And if you see me doing this,it's'cause it's cold.
It's cold.
It's, we're in la I'm not gonnalie to you, but it's cold.
It's,
Speaker (19:10):
it's la We in LA but the breeze is breezing.
Okay.
Okay.
Like
Speaker 4 (19:14):
you see me with this little coat on, like this breeze
is, blows it.
But
Speaker 2 (19:17):
so, um, yeah, like what happens?
And I was, while I was, youknow, going to the Lord, I also
felt like I don't wanna befoolish number one.
And I mean, I know like.
Look, the rain falls on the goodand the bad.
I did not want a situation whereI start this business and the
(19:41):
Lord has taken me through it andyeah.
You know, whatever.
And ultimately it fails and theyeah, the Lord will be there.
Like I, no, that's not thetestimony I want,
Speaker (19:50):
but you know what I, I wi No, let me I to keep it real.
I'm with you on that.
'cause that's where I'm alwayslike.
Let's be clear.
I've gone through enoughadversity, baby, I need, I, I
Speaker 2 (19:59):
don't need,
Speaker (20:00):
I need to live a nice
Speaker 2 (20:01):
life.
Like, like Jesus, take me offyour strongest saint list.
Speaker (20:05):
I right.
Listen.
I'm like, I'm a warrior.
I just can't be in the bud nomore.
I've been there, done that.
Can't do it no more.
Don't.
I don't
Speaker 2 (20:11):
want that.
No, no.
But then
Speaker (20:14):
I also feel like he puts us at these intersections
that's like I always feel likeGod also be like he be tugging
it with us as his kids.
He be, he be chin checking usbecause we really.
Don't listen and I say that wewith me in it, right?
That he chin check us.
Like so is it.
They thought, if it is it, youlet me know.
Speaker 2 (20:34):
And I'm like, please, please,
Speaker (20:39):
please you.
Like, could you just map out theLA the next five years and make
sure I ain't gonna go broke?
If you tell me I'm not gonna gobroke, just back about the five
years, then I'll be faithful.
But is that faithful?
But that's
Speaker 2 (20:48):
not faith.
Speaker (20:49):
Oh,
Speaker 2 (20:50):
but that's not faith, right?
That's not faith.
Speaker (20:54):
So how did you get over this?
Fair.
Okay.
How did you get over the fair?
Sorry.
Speaker 2 (20:58):
Stupidity.
I think no, faith.
Faith.
So, um, this, you know, good frugh, God,
Speaker 4 (21:08):
don't it, don't it make you laugh and just so many
things.
Oh,
Speaker 2 (21:14):
so many things.
Yes.
So I came through to Christmm-hmm.
Through my assistant.
She, this girl that there's noway I should have even hired
her.
That was God too, how she evengot that job.
Speaker 4 (21:24):
But anyway, say unqualified, but just be in
there.
Just
Speaker 2 (21:27):
be in there.
And
Speaker 4 (21:28):
I love that for us though,
Speaker 2 (21:30):
being the best assistant that that company has
ever had.
Oh, and only working for me andwhatever, all these things.
Mm-hmm.
So, um.
So she was really like, go, go,go, go.
She loves you, but go aheadthing girl.
Yeah.
All these things like theopportunity to create, you know,
the environment that you wantand blah, blah, blah, blah,
blah.
She's really enthusiastic.
(21:50):
And then my other friend and ourlittle, you know, group from
church, she was talk, we weretalking about, we would go to
church and then go back to myfriend Sylvia's house and watch
movies.
Yes.
And then go to night service orwhatever.
So, um.
So there's an Indiana Jonesfilm.
Yeah.
Where you know, Indy's runninglike from the Nazis or somebody
(22:12):
and he gets to this cavern andhe's checking the map and the
map shows stairs, right?
But he gets there and there's nostairs, so he's like, oh,
somebody blow up the stairs and.
You know, he tries everyincantation, every whatever.
You know his whip that he has?
(22:33):
Yeah.
It's not long enough to goacross the thing.
And he's like, what do you know?
What do you do?
What?
What happens now?
What do you do?
And he puts his foot out.
And when he puts his foot out, astair comes, a step comes
Speaker (22:47):
Tracy,
Speaker 2 (22:51):
and he puts it back.
Stair disappears.
So he puts it out again and thestair comes and he puts the
second foot out and anotherright, another step comes.
And when she said that, all Icould say was, thank you, Lord.
Speaker (23:10):
Oh.
Speaker 2 (23:11):
So I put my foot out crazy.
Speaker (23:13):
That's so profound, right?
Because I think it's put my footout so profound because I think
often, Ooh, that gave me chills.
God, no, because.
I think often we think faithmeans being still and waiting
for it to show up at your door,meet you with your car, right to
click,
Speaker 2 (23:32):
kick you over the head and be obvious.
And yes, yeah, the neon sign tosay yes.
You know, faith
Speaker (23:37):
is really
Speaker 2 (23:38):
faith.
Speaker (23:38):
Faith and taking action.
Speaker 2 (23:41):
Faith is.
Faith is what is the life thatyou want?
What is the love that you want?
Yeah.
What is the healing that youwant?
Now go do it.
Speaker (23:52):
Ooh.
And with no assurance other thanmy love for you think.
Speaker 2 (23:56):
Yes.
Think about it like theapostles.
The saints didn't always have,you know, they didn't always
fast and pray and blah, blah,blah.
And the lockdown or whateverthey have faith.
This is how the Lord acts.
This is how the Lord exists.
And
Speaker (24:12):
I know for certain he will show up.
Speaker 2 (24:14):
So I'm David, I'm gonna go.
They about to attack.
I don't have time.
Speaker 5 (24:18):
To slaughter a goat and whatever.
I gotta goat, right?
Yeah.
But I have faith and I carrythat faith into everything,
every space that I'm in.
Speaker 6 (24:31):
Oh, I know that was a word for you when she was like,
you gotta put your foot out.
She,
Speaker 5 (24:35):
we were just talking about it, but she wasn't
ministering to me.
Yes.
Speaker 6 (24:39):
But she was, but we
Speaker 5 (24:39):
were, she was ministering to me.
Right.
So I said, okay, and I went tothe Lord and I was like, okay,
I'm in it.
What are we doing now?
Ooh, shit.
Scare.
So once you do that, yes.
God has a sense of humor.
Oh, we allall know that, right?
Speaker 6 (24:56):
I always listen, I always tell you.
He be, he.
No, no.
A joke, joke.
He,
Speaker 5 (24:59):
he,
Speaker 6 (25:00):
I think he love a test.
What you mean?
Oh,
Speaker 5 (25:03):
oh no, you in this for real, God is like a dj.
Like, ha haha.
They really, they really go up.
They gonna dance all night onthis one.
Okay.
So the first thing was, okay, somy business partner.
Takes me to the number oneentertainment building in la
Yeah.
And he is like, okay, this iswhere your office is gonna be.
(25:24):
Yeah.
This is what he says.
Ooh.
I'm like, okay, great.
All right.
All right.
Now the Lord had given me a wordand he said, I'm taking you to a
new place.
We're building a new place.
Do not take anything from thesepeople.
Now, you know when you leave ajob to go to another job?
Yes.
Yes.
You might take your favoritepen, listen or stapler or
(25:47):
whatever,
Speaker 6 (25:47):
listen.
Speaker 5 (25:48):
Right.
That's normal.
Your
Speaker 6 (25:49):
favorite.
Yes, for sure.
Speaker 5 (25:50):
That's normal.
Nobody is upset,
Speaker 6 (25:52):
nobody walking, nobody would.
They expect you to take somesloppy paper.
Your favorite pen.
Okay.
Right
Speaker 5 (25:56):
now in my industry, when agents leave, you take all
your files, your contracts, ofcourse, your client's
information.
Yes.
All of this stuff technicallyillegal, but everybody knows
you're not right.
Speaker 6 (26:09):
You not just gonna hand them yo, you not just
saying, oh, Rolodex, whatever.
Exactly.
I'm not gonna hand them yourRolodex to go and try to No, I
totally, that makes sense,
Speaker 5 (26:16):
right?
So, but the Lord was very clear.
Don't take anything.
That's theirs.
Everything.
That is theirs.
Take, leave it.
I mean, everything that'stheirs.
Leave it.
Okay.
I'm going to do this very, veryclear in my spirit.
Okay.
So I have, you know, let's say50 clients that I look after.
(26:38):
Yeah.
The only clients that I toldthat I was even quitting were
the seven that I brought to theagency.
Who no longer had contracts atthe agency.
Those were the only ones I evenspoke to, and I invited them to
move with me.
Yeah.
Everybody else I didn't contact.
Now that does not happen in our,I was
Speaker 6 (26:57):
about to say,'cause technically you're leaving your
revenue, you're giving them yourrevenue, not
Speaker 5 (27:02):
tech.
Yes, a hundred percent.
I said,
Speaker 6 (27:04):
not technically, girl.
That's what I did.
I said, that's what I did.
Speaker 5 (27:07):
That's exactly what I did.
Now this manifests all for me.
Oh.
But I just, no, no, no.
You
Speaker 6 (27:12):
gotta see how that.
Speaker 5 (27:14):
No, no, it gets better.
That's nothing.
That's nothing.
So I had an assistant mm-hmm.
And a young white, straight man.
Mm-hmm.
Right?
And, um, he knew that I had beenlooking for work.
Yeah.
And.
Because he's getting calls from,you know,
Speaker 6 (27:33):
yes.
Different agencies.
Agencies and whatever.
You know, he, he doing a littlemath, he doing, he picking up
what's funny, what you put down.
Right.
Speaker 5 (27:39):
But I haven't said anything to him.
Yes.
Right.
And agents do speak to oneanother, so.
Yeah.
Right.
So, uh, he hasn't said anything.
And then one day he comes in myoffice and he goes, when are we
leaving?
And I said, who not heavy on thewe.
Tracy said, and I said, um.
And by the way, the other thingabout him is he is, um.
(28:05):
What do you call, I mean, I, I'mforgetting the term, but his
family is very well off.
Okay.
He doesn't have to work.
They call
Speaker 6 (28:11):
them nle babies now.
But I just feel like theirparents did what they supposed
to be doing.
'cause listen, his parents arenot God willing.
My baby's gonna be nipplebabies.
You hear me?
I'm telling y'all that rightnow.
His and ain't no shame in there.
His parents
Speaker 5 (28:21):
are not in the business.
But he didn't have to work.
He did not have to, but he
Speaker 6 (28:24):
wanted to.
That makes, makes it great.
Speaker 5 (28:26):
He did not have a job.
Okay?
He did not have to have a job.
Okay, so when are we leaving?
And I was like.
You know what?
You stay at a grown.
Literally, I said to him, youstay at a grown folks business.
Go out there and do because
Speaker 6 (28:35):
you like I'm I'm, or I'm, I need to make mortgages
suit.
Rent is a goat.
Like, don't be over here talkingabout what we leaving
Speaker 5 (28:43):
you over here plead.
So he said, okay, this is whatwe're gonna do.
When you have everything sorted,you let me know.
Okay?
And I said, uh, okay.
Okay.
All right.
And then I started, you know,like packing up my pictures or
(29:05):
books that I had and you know,little keepsakes or whatever.
And so every day for two weeks,he would help me carry yourself,
my keepsakes or whatever out ofmy office and put them into my
car.
Yeah.
And.
Then one day, one Tuesday, Icalled him from the car and I
said, okay, today is the day.
(29:29):
Um, I'm turning in my key card.
I'm gonna give notice.
And he is like, okay, great.
No problem.
Um, I'll meet you at the office.
And I said, what do you mean?
And he goes, yeah, I'll meet youat your office.
At your new office.
Speaker 6 (29:42):
Girl, he already had a plan.
He like, we leaving you, youdon't.
So he said, we leaving it Tracy.
So
Speaker 5 (29:49):
he gave notice and left, and by the time I got
there to turn in everything,yes, he had already quit.
And then he said, wait, I wentto the new office that had
already been set up by himbecause he was my assistant.
He figured out where I wasgoing, had a conversation.
(30:11):
With Jed, set up the new office,computer system, everything,
software, everything,everything.
Every, do you
Speaker 6 (30:19):
see?
Do you see the blessing?
Speaker 5 (30:21):
Well, no.
No.
Gets better.
Gets better.
Now you're not gonna believe thethe next part because it is so,
but it's a mirror.
Whatever.
Yeah.
So everything's set up.
Computer system, active data inthe system.
Data in the system.
'cause he said.
Oh, your contracts with themsays one thing.
(30:42):
Mine says something else.
Speaker 6 (30:46):
What?
Speaker 5 (30:47):
Okay.
Speaker 6 (30:48):
Do so.
Oh my
Speaker 5 (30:50):
gosh.
So he had set up a new officethe way that I liked it, except
for one thing.
Yeah.
My chair.
Yeah.
I had a, um, Herman Millerchair.
It's about a$1,500 chair.
Yeah, right.
And, um, I said, oh.
You got this little picnicchair,
Speaker 6 (31:11):
not you running down to the people at Staples in
office.
Max talking about you gonnagimme this regulated chip.
Yeah.
Speaker 5 (31:15):
How you gonna do all this chip?
Speaker 6 (31:17):
Not like,
Speaker 5 (31:18):
so, uh, so I said, oh, I'll just, you know, I said
I'll call the office.
The chair is used.
Yeah.
I bought it on eBay.
Yeah.
They'll, you know, maybe they'llsell the chair to me for like
$500 or something.
Right.
And then I remember what theLord said.
Don't take anything from there.
I was like, well, God, I'mbuying it.
Speaker 6 (31:37):
Yeah.
Like I ain't really taking it.
Yeah.
It's a transaction.
I'm
Speaker 5 (31:40):
buying it.
And I said, this man justinvested all this money in me.
I don't want him to be like, andshe bought a$1,500 chair.
Right.
This is what she spending mymoney on.
Like, right.
So$1,500 chair.
So, um, so did you call about
Speaker 6 (31:57):
the chair or you went
Speaker 5 (31:59):
chair?
I, I.
I was about to, you know, I didcall, I didn't leave a message.
Mm-hmm.
'cause the message from the Lordplayed in my mind.
And, um, then, uh, a few dayslater, mm-hmm.
Maybe two days later,'cause I'mmeeting with people or whatever.
Yeah.
Sitting on a little ricketychair, a box came and it was a
(32:21):
Herman Miller Aron chair.
And they come in sizes.
Yeah.
And it was my size.
And you know, they come withdifferent attachments and it
was, I, you know, it had all theattachments that I wanted and I
thought, oh, you know, Nikolaiordered a chair, chair, Nikolai,
Hey, thanks for the chair.
He goes, I didn't order a chair.
You told me not to order thechair because you were concerned
(32:41):
you wanted, but yeah.
Yeah.
And I said, oh.
So I went to the office, wentaround the office.
Did anybody order this chair?
Maybe somebody else's chair.
Nobody ordered the chair.
Okay.
All right.
I built a chair.
I put it up, and then mybusiness partner said, Hey, I
want you to come to New York andI want you to meet, you know the
other people in my office.
Maybe there's some businessthere for you.
(33:02):
So I show up at his office and Iwalk into a conference room and
there were 25 Herman Miller.
Cheers, Aaron chairs.
And I wanted to cry'cause I waslike.
I not only am thinking so small,like God has moved me to the
land of milk and hunt.
That's the way those chairs feltfor me.
(33:23):
Like I'm moving from a placewhere God.
Speaker 6 (33:26):
And you see how small you was thinking, girl, you
wanted to pay$500 for the usedchair and you didn't even
realize.
God is like, look, he alignedyou with somebody.
That baby them chairs is somechairs that's, this is a, it's a
chair.
It's a chair.
Speaker 5 (33:40):
We're making 10, 20, 30.
The plan is to make 40,$50million.
And you think I'm concernedabout a$1,500 chair.
Speaker 6 (33:47):
Oh, Tracy.
And it also again, like, it alsolike
Speaker 5 (33:51):
I got you.
Speaker 6 (33:53):
I I got you.
And stop it.
Speaker 7 (33:56):
Stop thinking so small.
Stop thinking you know what'sgoing on.
I told you, if you put your footin front of the other, I will
give you steps.
Jesus.
Oh my God, God.
Speaker 8 (34:08):
Like as
Speaker 6 (34:09):
So I learned to
Speaker 5 (34:10):
like as a human from time to time, I'm still gonna be
afraid.
Yes.
'cause
Speaker 6 (34:14):
we're human, but I'm not gonna be
Speaker 5 (34:15):
afraid of the$1,500 tricks.
Oh, not the 1500 tricks.
No, no.
Let me be afraid.
Of the$10 million tricks.
Yes.
The$20 million tricks.
Right.
Let me be afraid like.
The Lord just changed yourwhole, my whole frame of
reference.
Yes.
Like when I say, I got you, Igot you on the teeny tiny and I
(34:37):
got you on the bigger than youcould ever dream for yourself.
Yes.
Speaker 6 (34:42):
And you know I say that all the time that'cause I
feel like I'm a true dreamer.
Like I sit down and I'm avisionary.
I, I will let my, well let's do
Speaker 5 (34:51):
run, let's do some dreaming together.
Oh, I do something calledmindset movies.
Yes.
Like instead of making a, um,what do they call those boards?
Speaker 6 (35:01):
Like, uh Oh, I know what you're talking about.
A vision board.
Speaker 5 (35:04):
A vision board, yes.
I don't make vision boards.
I make vision movies.
I make mindset movies.
Ooh.
So I decide what I want for theyear.
Yes.
And then I do stuff like,
Speaker 6 (35:15):
you make a movie.
Speaker 5 (35:16):
I make a movie.
Speaker 6 (35:17):
And do you, how frequently do you watch, said
movie
Speaker 5 (35:19):
every day.
Speaker 6 (35:22):
What?
See?
Okay.
So.
Oh my God, this has giving meshows.
So let me tell you about thisactivity.
I wanna see your movie beforeyou showed me, because I don't,
I don't want it to be what Iused to
Speaker 8 (35:32):
grew up in circumstances where I had to be
Speaker 7 (35:36):
rough
Speaker 8 (35:36):
in the
Speaker 7 (35:36):
jungle.
Listen, listen.
And a no limit soldier.
You hear me?
No.
Yes.
Like, and so throughout thistime I'm also like very
disciplined and I'm also like, Idon't, I, I work for what I
have.
I, I don't want no freehandouts.
God sends what I work for what Ihave, because I don't wanna be
obligated to anything that's nottied to goodness.
(35:59):
You know what I mean?
And so what I used to do in likemy darkest moments, I would
visualize in deep detail what mylife would be like when his
vision for me showed up.
And Tracy, when I say deepdetail, oh it makes me
emotional, like.
(36:19):
I used to think about when Iopened my eyes in the morning,
what would I see?
How would my bedroom look?
How would I brush my teeth?
How would I have breakfast?
What would my days be?
What would I be hearing?
These are the things that buildmy spirit in the darkest styles
of my life.
Like that's why I have such acomplex relationship with like
(36:42):
food and way I operate.
I've always kind of worked onlike Nimble and what needs to
happen, like what am I gonna dotoday for that vision of Sneak
Tomorrow?
And I took the detail where I'dbe like, oh, I want to brush my
teeth with.
Holgate, peppermint.
It'll be electric tooth rush, mybathroom will be marble.
(37:06):
These are levels of detail thatI feel like distracted me from
my reality, and it's, it makesme emotional'cause not
consciously thinking about it.
It is the life I live in.
Amen.
So the, every time I even thinkabout it, amen.
Tracy.
(37:26):
It.
So without planning, this is not
Speaker 8 (37:30):
like, no, you don't have the freedom of the Lord.
Like little things, you know, Iremember Saturday mornings they
would show these movies from thesixties wherever.
I grew up watching, you know,James Bond Crazy films on
Saturdays.
And I remember seeing him driveto Aston Martin and I told my
dad,
Speaker 5 (37:46):
Oh, that car.
I like that car.
And he's like, oh, you can haveit.
You just have to work hard.
It's expensive.
And now I drive a Aston Martin.
And I didn't, it wasn't like agoal for me.
Yes, it was.
Speaker 6 (38:00):
It wasn't something that I was like, I, I'm
Speaker 5 (38:02):
focused now.
I know I made it.
Yes.
Speaker 6 (38:04):
It, it was, it, it was something that, it kept me,
Speaker 5 (38:10):
me, it, it was, it
Speaker 6 (38:11):
comforted me in the darkest moments.
Mm.
And I just.
It was just things that I toldmyself that I in detail
Speaker 5 (38:18):
the Lord, I will like do something or be at the place
and then it'll come to my mind.
How at a point in my life Iwanted this.
Or I was really working for itand then life happened and I
forgot about it.
And when I bought this car, itliterally was like the city had
towed my Lexus.
(38:39):
Okay.
The city had towed my Lexus andI had to buy a car.
Yes.
So I was like, okay, let me, oh,I tried the new Lexus.
I don't like that body.
Yes.
Okay, well let me try this.
I tried, like, I kept tryingdifferent cars and none of them
were, were what I wanted and Ithought.
And Aston Martin, they came outwith a SUV.
(39:00):
I was like, girl, that car costsmore than your house.
Yes.
And I said to God, like, can Ibuy this car?
Like I said, look, if it am Itripping.
Right?
If it, I said if it fits, if I,my big behind gets in it.
Yes.
And it's comfortable.
I'm gonna buy this car.
Are we, are we being, are webeing,'cause it was, the
pandemic money was not comingin.
All of that.
(39:21):
I got in that car and I waslike, oh, I'm home.
Oh, I'm home.
I gave them the man, my AmericanExpress.
It's you like, run it up.
Run it up.
Put the car on the AmericanExpress.
Speaker 6 (39:30):
Run it up.
I'm gonna have
Speaker 5 (39:31):
hella points.
Yes.
Speaker 6 (39:33):
I'm gonna take a few trips over this car right here.
Speaker 5 (39:37):
That was it.
Yeah.
So that was my, that's how westarted the agency and
Speaker 6 (39:43):
oh, now I need to see this, my movie.
Speaker 5 (39:45):
Oh yes.
So, you know, we pray over.
Yes, I pray over every clientthat we signed and whatever.
It's been a, a amazing journey.
Um,
Speaker 6 (39:55):
what made you start these mind movies?
Speaker 5 (39:58):
Is it fun?
I haven't shown this to anybodyelse.
You're the only one, so youcannot I feel privileged.
You cannot comment.
I feel
Speaker 6 (40:04):
so privileged.
No, I'm not commenting.
You guys can't see.
This is, Nope.
You can't.
This is
Speaker 5 (40:07):
just for her.
Speaker 6 (40:08):
That is beautiful because it takes a level of
consciousness to put that videotogether.
Speaker 5 (40:14):
I just always, I go back to you a lot of times too,
that we don't even have a rightto call what we believe, faith,
because the Lord says, try me.
Hmm.
Right, and we've all tried him.
Our faith is based on Godshowing up.
It's not based on, yeah, just Ibelieve how we
Speaker 6 (40:32):
operate and listen,
Speaker 5 (40:34):
it's based on like how many times I've been in a
spot and prayed and he's rescuedme how many times I needed
provision.
And provision has arrived.
Right?
It's based on him doing.
Speaker 6 (40:47):
Yes.
So how is it Faith?
My question to you is, so everytime fear shows up.
And he go, ha, how is that notjust reaffirmed your faith, but
also showed you what thedefinition of fear really is.
Speaker 5 (41:07):
One thing is a lot of times I'm gonna say anybody
else, I'm afraid and I don'trealize it, I gotta recognize
that it's fair.
Yeah.
That it's fear and then I knowwhat to do.
To, you know, rip it apart, tobreak it down.
Speaker 6 (41:27):
How did, when do you reflect and go, oh, that was
fair.
That was, that was me being afair,
Speaker 5 (41:32):
I think that's, you know, journaling, that's prayer,
that's fasting, that's beingreflective and really trying to
do the work and be honest withyourself.
You know, why aren't even when Idon't like somebody, right?
Yeah.
I'm thinking.
That person didn't do anythingto me.
Why don't I like him?
Speaker 6 (41:53):
Listen, in Caribbean culture, it'd be like Miss
Spirit n you if Miss Spirit necyou.
That is a valid reason.
But truly though,
Speaker 5 (42:02):
right?
What?
Truly, because a lot, a lot oftimes I don't like that person
'cause I feel like they might besmarter than me or whatever.
Right?
But so to analyze those things,to face my own fears stuff.
Mm-hmm.
Yeah.
My own fears and then I get tochange it.
Uh Right.
I give it to the Lord and I lethim use it, and he normally
(42:23):
creates something
Speaker 6 (42:24):
better
Speaker 5 (42:25):
golden for me.
Speaker 6 (42:27):
Oh,
Speaker 5 (42:28):
right.
He's able to take all of thosefears and turn them around so
that they benefit me.
Speaker 6 (42:34):
Oh my.
Speaker 5 (42:35):
So you wanna take, it gives you the courage to like.
Go out in the world and be boldbecause every hesitation, every
fear I have, I'm gonna give itto God and he's gonna turn it
around into something for mybenefit.
So what do I really have to fear
Speaker 6 (42:52):
and why?
And why are we so damn stubbornabout it too?
Speaker 5 (42:55):
Because it's hard to remember.
Like we are physical.
We live in this physical world.
Speaker 6 (42:59):
Yeah, we're humans.
Humans be human.
Speaker 5 (43:00):
And the things that I'm saying right now, I know
how.
Naive.
I sound or provincial or,
Speaker 6 (43:06):
but it's not, and that's where I'm just like, but
it's not naive.
And I always say I'm a walkintestimony
Speaker 5 (43:13):
if you're a believer.
Yeah.
It's not, it's not naive, butlike this, this conversation is
gonna go out into the universe.
Yeah.
And then someone is gonna saysomething very funny and quippy
and Yeah, yeah, yeah.
I've never known her representme like she blah.
Right.
And yeah.
And that's gonna hurt myfeelings and you know, I,
whatever ever.
(43:33):
But it'll also encourage
Speaker 6 (43:35):
Yeah, someone, someone else to move past.
Right.
And still take action.
And
Speaker 5 (43:39):
it is the truth.
Yes.
Right?
Like I am.
I do, I'm blessed.
I have a good brain.
I'm hardworking.
Yes.
But I'm not perfect.
Speaker 6 (43:48):
But no one is
Speaker 5 (43:49):
I, but even that, I'm not perfect.
But
Speaker 6 (43:51):
even perfection and even perfection.
Is criticized.
Speaker 5 (43:56):
Well, yeah, that's true.
Speaker 6 (43:57):
Like, but you have to realize that that's not your
real gauge Things
Speaker 5 (44:00):
that I have, the things that I have done Yeah.
Are by the grace of God.
Yeah.
And in everything, all I can do,all I'm here to do is I show up,
I educate myself.
I do the best job that I can do.
Yeah.
That I can be.
And that that is not only has itbeen good enough, it's been
extraordinary.
Speaker 6 (44:19):
And that is your excellence.
But I just, but I also think.
In thinking of that, like, yeah,someone's gonna watch this and
be like, yeah, that's naive, dada da da.
You.
It's also recognizing that,that, that ability to go, yeah,
that's naive.
That's, and to be negative,baby, you're fearful, you're,
you're fear.
(44:40):
You are afraid of your ownpotential.
And that's what that is.
So how the, I'm, I always saylike, I'm not her.
I'm not her.
'cause I'm like, oh, who hurtyou?
What in your life made you feellike prosperity is not deserved
to everybody?
Speaker 5 (44:57):
Or that, like, my method, since my method is
different than yours, it's notas valid, but anyway.
Yeah.
But that's, that's, but
Speaker 6 (45:03):
that's the whole, and that's honestly, that's, that's
the Tracy experience.
That's also the premise of thispodcast.
That's the reason we had theseconversations.
Because your definition of fairshould be different for
everybody.
Mm-hmm.
Mm-hmm.
And it, for each individual thatdefinition transforms.
It does not mean the same thingin every single season of your
(45:24):
life.
So does that mean you're betterthan someone else?
Does that mean their definitionis better than your definition?
No, but, and also moreimportantly, does that mean that
you cannot learn from mydefinition
Speaker 5 (45:34):
for damn Sure.
Speaker 6 (45:35):
Exactly.
One
Speaker 5 (45:36):
thing that I am afraid of now is I remember.
A 20-year-old Tracy and youknow, your aunties and older
people try to tell you somethingand you're polite and you're
listening.
Yeah.
Right.
But if I knew then what I knownow, I would, I would be, you
know, I can't even
Speaker 6 (45:56):
In your mind, in your mind, you would be all these
different places, but God islike you.
Exactly.
Where I want.
Where I want you to.
It's true.
You exactly where I want to.
You got it when I wanted you tohave it.
You got it when I wanted you.
'cause I also think part of.
This new age of all thisinformation and access to
conversations and people thatyou wouldn't get their stories
just being in your own bubble.
Speaker 5 (46:16):
Mm-hmm.
Speaker 6 (46:17):
Part of that, the, the greatness of that is
understanding that when you getit is when you're supposed to
get it.
Speaker 5 (46:24):
You're right.
That's a word.
That's the word, but I wantyoung women to know like.
Jump.
Jump, yes.
Do what is the thing that youwanna do.
Do it.
Speaker 6 (46:36):
Yep.
Speaker 5 (46:36):
Right.
Don't wait till you're,
Speaker 6 (46:38):
till you're older to try to do it.
But also not knowing the dream,not knowing where you want to
go, should not paralyze you tomove forward.
Speaker 5 (46:49):
Okay?
So all of you guys, the smartestthing that was said in this
conversation today, she justsaid.
Not knowing where you wanna goshould not paralyze you.
You have to, you're like ashark.
If you stop moving forward,you're dead.
You need to put one foot infront of the other every single
(47:10):
day.
The length of the stride doesn'tmatter, but every single day,
make a move forward.
Speaker 6 (47:16):
Yeah.
Do something.
It's not about the direction.
It's always about the.
The details.
Okay.
Speaker 5 (47:21):
\Thank you so much
Speaker 6 (47:21):
for this conversation.
This was so amazing and no
Speaker 5 (47:25):
thank you.
Speaker 6 (47:26):
Oh, and this is, thank you.
How do you divide?
Fair.
Hi.
Thank you for having me.
Speaker (00:01):
Listen, we had to make this happen because I feel like
who you are and your story isreally aspiring, right.
But I also feel like throughoutyour journey, you've, you've
learned so much that ourcommunity can grow from.
Speaker 2 (00:15):
First of all, I want everyone to know.
How this came, not just how thiscame about, but we are in the
back of a restaurant, right Whenwe finish this meeting, this
dialogue, she's gonna hop in mycar.
I'm driving her to the airport.
We're in Los Angeles.
She lives across the country.
The idea that you live in NewYork, you were out here on
(00:37):
business.
Yep.
We met.
Before her flight takes off fromla Yes.
I love how flexible Johnny onthe spot she's got her
equipment.
Yes.
Listen,
Speaker (00:48):
I always say I don't have to get ready.
I stay ready.
Night shift
Speaker 2 (00:52):
a word.
Okay.
I don't to a total word.
She's not lying.
Speaker (00:56):
Listen, I have my three camera points set up.
You guys are gonna see and enjoythis interview, but I don't, she
Speaker 2 (01:01):
showed me her setup.
I am impressed.
Okay.
I am impressed.
Speaker (01:07):
Thank you.
Because I also think that wethink there's so many barriers
for entry to, to create a brandand to show up in the world in
the way that you want to.
Where most of that is in ourhead.
Right.
And.
I think you're gonna walk usthrough that today by sharing
how the definition of fair haschanged over the course of your
life.
But ultimately, I do things likethis to show people that if
(01:30):
there is a crack in the door,baby, I'm busting in waving a
fall.
Fall.
Like I'm not, I'm want to alwaysshow up as my full self.
Am I always like a hundredpercent prepared?
No.
But am I also a hundred percentqualified?
Absolutely.
And I move off of that,
Speaker 2 (01:47):
you know, there's an old saying that says 90% of
success is showing up.
Speaker 3 (01:51):
Mm.
Speaker 2 (01:51):
And um, the person who can figure out how to show
up Yeah.
Always wins.
Speaker (01:59):
Aw,
Speaker 2 (02:00):
always.
Speaker (02:01):
Thank you.
Speaker 2 (02:01):
Yeah.
Speaker (02:02):
Say thank you.
And so for me, that's what I'malways like, I don't wanna, if
there is a barrier, it won't beme.
If there's a barrier, it won'tbe me.
So tell us more about you, youragency, your clothing line.
Who is Tracy Christian?
Speaker 2 (02:17):
So I have a talent agency called TCA and we
represent mostly actors, butproducers, writers, directors.
We have a styling division, um,and we've been in business now.
For almost 17 years.
Mm-hmm.
Um, and it's been fantastic.
Um, how did I get into theentertainment industry?
(02:39):
Yeah.
So I was friends with a directornamed John Singleton.
Uh, and I was very close to, youknow, his assistant, uh, Joe
Doherty, and we were just kindof hanging out one day and I
said, Hey, graduating college,what do you guys think I would
be good at?
What should I do for a living?
And John said, you should eitherbe a madam or an agent.
Speaker (03:01):
What a swing.
Speaker 2 (03:03):
What a swing.
Right.
And I thought, okay, I look cuteand orange, but I don't wanna
wear it all the time.
Speaker (03:08):
You know?
So I don't want my man, my billsplaying for me.
Speaker 2 (03:11):
Right?
So, uh, maybe I'll do this agentthing.
And John was, you know, verypopular at the time.
Yeah.
Um.
Uh, boys in the hood had justcome out, so he arranged a
meeting for me and, uh, at hisagency, CAA and, and I knew that
I could get a position therejust because of who John was,
(03:33):
you know?
Right.
Like in the mail room orsomething.
Yes.
But I used the leverage, I ucaa's interest to get leverage
around town and I found anagency that I thought was.
Oh, okay.
I found an agency that I thoughtI would be able to learn the
business and would promote mebecause in being an agent, it's
(03:56):
like an apprenticeship position.
Yeah.
You need that agent that youwork for to give you access to
their connections and theirtalent and
Speaker (04:06):
in order to establish yourself.
Right.
Yeah.
Speaker 2 (04:08):
So, uh, so I found an agency and it was this.
You know, bicoastal boutiqueagency that had a lot of
classically trained actors.
I was working with, you know, onthe director side, like David
Mamet was calling the office.
Martin Scorsese's company wascalling the office.
Like so at that level.
Yeah.
And actors like Lindsay Kraus,um, Joe Montia, blah, blah, you
(04:31):
know, Rebecca Pigeon.
And, uh, that's how I built myaesthetic.
Yeah, that's how I was trained.
Um, I was going to the theaterevery week.
Nice.
Uh, yeah, that's, I
Speaker (04:43):
love that.
But it also sounds like you,you, you got direction and you
took it and you ran with it.
Right.
Speaker 2 (04:51):
So that's why when you asked me and I said the word
fear.
Yeah.
Right.
So then I was young and naiveand stupid.
I didn't know enough to beafraid of entertainment or this
position or anything like that.
Yeah.
I just thought like, I am young,I'm smart.
(05:11):
I will be an asset to wherever Igo.
Yes.
Um, no one will be able tooutwork me.
I may not have, you know, adegree or a credential in this
field, but I'm that girl.
Like, I'll stay there tillmidnight, you know, figuring it
out.
I'm willing do
Speaker 4 (05:27):
the work.
Yeah.
Yeah.
Speaker 2 (05:27):
I'm willing to do the work and in a year.
Speaker 4 (05:30):
Yep.
Speaker 2 (05:31):
Now they'll promote.
Now, I mean, I didn't know.
I didn't know what I didn'tknow.
Yes.
But, uh, that
Speaker (05:36):
hard work sometimes does not equate to promotions.
Right.
I tell people that all the time.
Speaker 2 (05:40):
Hard work.
Hard work is not enough.
Speaker (05:42):
Yes.
It is not.
Speaker 2 (05:43):
Hard work is not enough.
And
Speaker (05:44):
sometimes you've just become hard work
Speaker 2 (05:46):
and sometimes Oh, I love that.
I, especially women.
Speaker (05:49):
Yes.
Speaker 2 (05:50):
Especially women.
I
Speaker (05:51):
just had this conversation that unfortunately
when you become a really gooddoer,
Speaker 2 (05:57):
that's what people want from you
Speaker (05:59):
and you just, your whole existence will be
Speaker 2 (06:01):
doing,
Speaker (06:02):
doing,
Speaker 2 (06:03):
doing.
So, um, but I was promoted, youknow, very early and, uh, was
able to establish a list formyself and just grew my own book
of business from there.
And, and by and large, like theblack community in
entertainment, they were reallysupportive.
Speaker (06:25):
Nice.
My That's really good though.
Speaker 2 (06:27):
Yeah.
My first client was a guy namedand I still represent him to
this day.
Nice.
So that was 30 something years,38.
Years ago.
Mm-hmm.
Uh, Roger Veer Smith, and he hadjust won the Peabody Award for
doing his play a Huey p Newtonstory.
Nice.
And he was in like all theseSpike Lee films.
And, and Roger was like, he'sabout about it.
(06:49):
Yeah.
Right.
Like he's, yeah.
If we want black people inHollywood, it's just not in
front of the camera.
It's behind the camera.
And you vote with your dollars.
Yes.
So, and listen,
Speaker (07:00):
that's why we boycotting all these things
right now, right?
That's why we not, that's, lemmejust grab this phone.
I just didn't stop you and yourthoughts.
No,
Speaker 2 (07:06):
no, no.
It's why we're not in target.
Speaker (07:09):
This is exactly why we're not in target.
Speaker 2 (07:11):
So Roger left William Morris, which for those people
who don't know, is a very, veryestablished.
You know, agency and mm-hmm.
Prestigious agency and he signedwith me.
Speaker (07:22):
Nice.
Speaker 2 (07:23):
And I think I was still an assistant or like a
junior agent at the time when he
Speaker (07:26):
did that.
Yeah.
But also he took, he, he sawsomething.
Speaker 2 (07:30):
I think he, yeah, look, I think he saw something,
but I also think that's who heis.
Like he's not about lip service.
Speaker 4 (07:37):
Oh, he's about action.
Speaker 2 (07:38):
He's about the revolution.
Nice.
Right.
And so he's like, look, here's ayoung sister.
She's trying to do her thing.
I have a manager.
I have an attorney, so they'regonna make sure she doesn't do
anything, you know?
Crazy.
Crazy.
Exactly right.
They gonna keep
Speaker (07:51):
it in a guard rail, essentially, right?
Yes.
Speaker 2 (07:54):
But how, who's gonna, if we don't invest in our tribe,
who's gonna do it?
Who's gonna do it?
And because I had Roger, youknow, I could get my phone calls
returned.
Yes.
And I just built upon that.
Speaker (08:08):
So tell me, how did fair show up at this time?
Right, because you, you have.
You were so fortunate to have acommunity of people that were
like, Tracy, I see you.
I value, you have somethingimpactful to the world.
Right.
Tell me how, although you hadthis sense of reaffirming and
validation around you, you stillwere I know, you know, fear
still existed there, but you,one thing you must give yourself
(08:29):
credit for is you kept moving.
I did.
But how was, how did Fair showup in that season?
Speaker 2 (08:34):
Oh my gosh.
So.
The world.
I mean, we all know theexpression, the glass ceiling.
Speaker 3 (08:41):
Yep.
Speaker 2 (08:42):
I think when you're young, black and female, there's
the mythos.
Everybody says they want to helpyou.
Yeah.
And they will help you untilthey don't.
Right.
Until they feel like, like atthat point I was not
competition.
Speaker 3 (08:59):
Yeah.
Speaker 2 (08:59):
Right.
So people were like, oh yeah,come in, whatever.
But.
A lot of people didn't know howsmart I was or how hard that I
was prepared to work or howstrategic I could be and I was
having fun at it.
And if you're a person whonaturally is playing chess
(09:24):
instead of checkers, ugh, thatscares people.
Speaker (09:28):
It does it Totally understand.
So the stop, because I'm that,so the help
Speaker 2 (09:33):
stops.
Speaker (09:33):
It's not, and it's not just that the help stops they
all, they then become fearful.
Because what I've learned over,I always say my short years of
here in life, but long in a way,is that people find comfort and
predictability.
Speaker 2 (09:48):
Of course.
I, who, who doesn't.
Right?
That's, that's mankind.
This is right.
So
Speaker (09:55):
that's why I always say it's easy for people to take
humans as their parents.
Right.
You're pretty, you're this,you're ugly.
You're that I put you in a box.
I know this, I know how to, yes.
And that level of predictabilitycomforts them.
But once you start to show up ina world
Speaker 2 (10:12):
that they were not prepared for and you start
unusual
Speaker 4 (10:15):
that box, they're like, hold on now.
Hold on, hold on.
Hold, hold on, hold on, hold on,hold on, hold on, hold on.
I don't know if I'm ready tosupport no more because she, she
outside the box.
Speaker 2 (10:25):
And when I tried to put her back in the box, she, oh
my,
Speaker 4 (10:29):
she ain't really, wouldn't she?
She, she
Speaker 2 (10:31):
fighting back.
Yes.
And she kind of hurting,
Speaker (10:34):
bruise, bruised me up.
Yes.
But that's interesting.
So how did you deal with thatfear in that time when it was
like, oh, young sister, she'sstarting her agency.
There's people, her, well, Ididn't even start the
Speaker 2 (10:46):
agency yet.
I was still just working
Speaker (10:47):
for ca In
Speaker 2 (10:48):
the, in the system?
No, I was at a agency called.
Uh, I won't even, they don'teven deserve name.
They don't deserve the name.
But, but no.
But, uh, you was
Speaker (10:56):
at another agency and you, you still had that support,
right?
And people were supporting youuntil,
Speaker 2 (11:01):
until, so, um, I learned how to be aggressive.
I learned how to do my jobwithout scaring people.
And I think that's a thing thatwomen learn and thankfully, your
generation is unlearning.
Yes.
Like you guys just show up.
Yes.
And you guys show up with theidea that your emotional
(11:24):
emotions are not my concern.
Right.
Those are
Speaker (11:27):
your bags to hold girl.
Right.
Speaker 2 (11:29):
And And we were very different.
We were like, okay, I need tomove in such a way that this man
doesn't feel threatened.
Yes.
So that he will continue tosupport me.
Right.
Speaker (11:42):
Absolutely.
I have family members thatstruggle with that to this day
because I think it's like, it'salso we got good at condition.
Well, we
Speaker 2 (11:47):
got good at it.
No, and right.
You don't wanna give it up ifyou good at it.
Speaker (11:51):
And it's conditioning.
Speaker 2 (11:53):
Absolutely.
It's
Speaker (11:53):
conditioning from what?
Like what my aunts and mygrandparents, like that
generation told you.
Like, show up and do what youneed to do, but don't get in the
way.
Speaker 2 (12:01):
Don't get in the way pacify like whatever
methodology.
You had Yeah.
To make the, to make yoursupervisor feel like promoting
you was gonna benefit him.
Speaker (12:14):
Yeah.
Speaker 2 (12:14):
Right.
That's what you cultivated.
Speaker (12:17):
And then I think what our generation has learned from
that is Dennis abuse.
Well,
Speaker 2 (12:22):
it's always abuse, you know?
Speaker (12:24):
That is abuse.
It's, it's always abuse.
It's like, you know what I mean?
But like, like you said, theyhelp you until they don't.
Right.
And then how did you, how didyou pivot?
How did you manage during thattime when they were like, oh
shit.
She, she out here playing chessnot check is, so when
Speaker 2 (12:39):
I, my check is I, by that time, Iran, I
Speaker (12:41):
transitioned out,
Speaker 2 (12:42):
moved to a different agency.
Speaker 3 (12:43):
Okay.
Speaker 2 (12:44):
But, and when I felt that glass ceiling again.
And really not knowing what todo.
The Lord took over.
Speaker 3 (12:51):
Nice
Speaker 2 (12:52):
because I did, I'd said to myself, okay, so I have
this opportunity to move to UTAor to move to another large
agency, but I know it's gonna bemore of the same.
Is this just gonna be my lot inlife?
Speaker (13:06):
Is this the journey of the nation?
Yes.
Yeah.
Mm-hmm.
Speaker 2 (13:09):
So this is being totally transparent.
So, um, a girlfriend approachedme and she's like, well, you
should come work with us.
And she was at a styling agency.
They represented hairstylists,makeup artists.
And I said, um, yeah, my clientsare like pretty successful
actors.
They do not wanna be at anagency that represents
(13:29):
hairstylists.
Speaker (13:30):
Yeah.
Right.
Speaker 2 (13:31):
Like that's not gonna happen.
Yeah.
Speaker (13:33):
And it's not gonna align with the brand that you've
already established.
Speaker 2 (13:36):
Yeah.
Not gonna happen.
So she said, um, well maybe myboss would be interested in
creating a separate agency.
Speaker (13:45):
Oh, based on your clientele.
Right.
Speaker 2 (13:48):
So I said, okay, you know, whatever.
So I talked to her guy over thephone and we had like a five
minute conversation and then hesaid, okay, well when I come to
LA we'll get together.
Yeah.
So he, true.
He came to LA and we sat downand had dinner and I picked like
the total wrong place to takehim because I couldn't think of
(14:09):
anything.
And then he said, um, okay, solet's do this.
And he goes, I'm gonna be backout here and we'll drop all the,
you know, do all the things.
And I was like, okay, whatever.
Look, I'm, I'm in Hollywood.
People say that they're gonna do
Speaker (14:26):
things, that everything, listen, I hear about
that Hollywood life.
They'll look at your face and belike.
Speaker 2 (14:32):
Not only in Hollywood, but LA is a place
where they yes you to death.
Speaker (14:35):
They're just so funny
Speaker 2 (14:36):
to me, New York is a place like, no, I don't like
you.
We'll never do business.
They're keeping
Speaker (14:40):
it a buck with you.
We gonna let you know.
You probably never gonna see meagain.
New Yorkers.
Speaker 2 (14:44):
Yeah.
New Yorkers are verystraightforward.
Right?
I know.
Speaker (14:47):
That's why I think LA's so funny to me.
I find it so comical and I hatethat people are always like.
Why do you take these things asjokes?
They are not jokes, but I'mlike, it's funny because they
believe that I believe them.
So then it's funny.
Speaker 2 (14:59):
Oh, okay.
In that case, yeah.
Then it is funny.
But yeah, LA tends to get yes.
You to death.
Yes.
So, um, yeah.
So I didn't pay any, you know,attention.
Oh,
Speaker (15:07):
so you were like, mm-hmm.
This is a good me in here.
I ain't Right.
Never go ahead for the managain.
Speaker 2 (15:12):
Right.
So I've now I've met this guy,I've spoken to him three times.
I've met him twice.
Yeah.
And this like, the second timewe met, he had, um.
I'd printed out my client listand did everything, you know,
appropriate, although I didn't,I didn't know, and he said,
okay, I didn't really look overwhat you sent me.
(15:33):
And he said, how much money doyou need to make as a salary?
Okay.
And how much money do you thinkwe can make?
And I said, well, if you look atpage two of the perspective, you
know that he said, yeah.
Speaker (15:44):
If you look page two, the proposal that I sent you
last week and ahead of thismeeting.
Right.
Which you didn't read, but I'lltalk you through it right now.
Sure.
Yeah.
So
Speaker 2 (15:51):
he said, he goes, just tell me.
And I said, yeah.
And he goes, all right, so whendo you wanna start?
And I was like, excuse me,excuse
Speaker 4 (15:58):
me, sir.
Speaker 2 (15:58):
And Port.
And he said, yeah, let's start.
Why don't you give notice?
And.
And that's when it got scary andI went back to the Lord and I
had all of these conditions,like, okay, the office has to be
in this kind of place and looklike this and this, and all of
these things.
'cause I said to God, I am tooold to start over.
Speaker 3 (16:20):
Oh,
Speaker 2 (16:20):
okay.
You hear all these horrorstories about, you know, you
trusted this business partner.
They ran away with the money, orthe money ran out or mm-hmm.
You know, all very human things.
Speaker 3 (16:30):
Yeah.
Yeah,
Speaker 2 (16:31):
I'm too old to go through that.
Yes.
And I take care of my mother andthis has to be for real.
So like Jed chased me around forprobably, I don't know how many
months
Speaker (16:45):
telling
Speaker 2 (16:45):
me to start.
Let's start.
Let's start.
Let's start.
Speaker (16:47):
What was the hesitation?
Everything afraid of like itbeing real.
What, like what was the fear?
Yeah.
No, I wasn't
Speaker 2 (16:52):
afraid of it being real.
I was afraid of it being notreal and um, I'd never.
I'd never done something of thislevel before this magnitude.
Right.
And to my knowledge, I didn'treally know any women who owned
an agency, much less, any blackwomen.
(17:14):
Usually, um, when people startagencies, it's, they get a big,
you know,$50 million investmentfrom some fund or something.
And of course, they're white menand.
They start an agency with somelinchpin clients, like Yeah.
When you start an agency, youdon't start an agency with
George Clooney.
(17:34):
Yeah.
You start an agency with TomCruise, Brad Pitt.
George Clooney.
Matt Damon.
Yeah.
You start and Ben Affleck.
Speaker (17:41):
Yeah.
You should start with thecollective.
Speaker 2 (17:44):
Yeah.
You start with 200 million, 300million million in billing.
Speaker (17:50):
Oh, right.
Yes.
And.
So it was it.
This is all new.
It's like how do I start what?
I think it was all wrong.
Yes,
Speaker 2 (17:58):
it was all wrong.
But I
Speaker (17:59):
always say, I always kind of boil things down to
simple math.
Right.
One plus one makes two.
Speaker 2 (18:03):
Mm-hmm.
Speaker (18:04):
And, but it also reminds me that we need to know
when operating the word in, indivine order with God, he does
not operate in simple math.
Speaker 2 (18:14):
Okay.
So my girlfriends at church.
Yeah.
Were all telling me to moveforward.
And I had all the confirmationin the universe and I was angry
about it because I just feltlike these people don't
understand.
Yeah.
You know?
And there's nobody in my churchthat operates a hundred million
dollars business, even a$10million business business.
Speaker (18:37):
So they don't know the risk they trying to tell me to
take.
Right.
Speaker 2 (18:39):
They're trying to like, am I gonna live at your
house?
If it exactly fails, if me andmy mama
Speaker (18:43):
gonna be in your guest room, like
Speaker 2 (18:46):
right.
Speaker (18:47):
If this fails,
Speaker 2 (18:47):
and if these clients that I have decide to leave me
or they're poached or Yeah.
Whatever,
Speaker (18:53):
what happens.
Yeah.
If the worst, the worst happens,worst happens.
Happens.
What
Speaker 2 (18:57):
happens.
Yeah.
Um, so yeah.
How did
Speaker (19:01):
you navigate that fear I had, because that's real.
Speaker 2 (19:03):
Had a ton.
A real world.
And if you see me doing this,it's'cause it's cold.
It's cold.
It's, we're in la I'm not gonnalie to you, but it's cold.
It's,
Speaker (19:10):
it's la We in LA but the breeze is breezing.
Okay.
Okay.
Like
Speaker 4 (19:14):
you see me with this little coat on, like this breeze
is, blows it.
But
Speaker 2 (19:17):
so, um, yeah, like what happens?
And I was, while I was, youknow, going to the Lord, I also
felt like I don't wanna befoolish number one.
And I mean, I know like.
Look, the rain falls on the goodand the bad.
I did not want a situation whereI start this business and the
(19:41):
Lord has taken me through it andyeah.
You know, whatever.
And ultimately it fails and theyeah, the Lord will be there.
Like I, no, that's not thetestimony I want,
Speaker (19:50):
but you know what I, I wi No, let me I to keep it real.
I'm with you on that.
'cause that's where I'm alwayslike.
Let's be clear.
I've gone through enoughadversity, baby, I need, I, I
Speaker 2 (19:59):
don't need,
Speaker (20:00):
I need to live a nice
Speaker 2 (20:01):
life.
Like, like Jesus, take me offyour strongest saint list.
Speaker (20:05):
I right.
Listen.
I'm like, I'm a warrior.
I just can't be in the bud nomore.
I've been there, done that.
Can't do it no more.
Don't.
I don't
Speaker 2 (20:11):
want that.
No, no.
But then
Speaker (20:14):
I also feel like he puts us at these intersections
that's like I always feel likeGod also be like he be tugging
it with us as his kids.
He be, he be chin checking usbecause we really.
Don't listen and I say that wewith me in it, right?
That he chin check us.
Like so is it.
They thought, if it is it, youlet me know.
Speaker 2 (20:34):
And I'm like, please, please,
Speaker (20:39):
please you.
Like, could you just map out theLA the next five years and make
sure I ain't gonna go broke?
If you tell me I'm not gonna gobroke, just back about the five
years, then I'll be faithful.
But is that faithful?
But that's
Speaker 2 (20:48):
not faith.
Speaker (20:49):
Oh,
Speaker 2 (20:50):
but that's not faith, right?
That's not faith.
Speaker (20:54):
So how did you get over this?
Fair.
Okay.
How did you get over the fair?
Sorry.
Speaker 2 (20:58):
Stupidity.
I think no, faith.
Faith.
So, um, this, you know, good frugh, God,
Speaker 4 (21:08):
don't it, don't it make you laugh and just so many
things.
Oh,
Speaker 2 (21:14):
so many things.
Yes.
So I came through to Christmm-hmm.
Through my assistant.
She, this girl that there's noway I should have even hired
her.
That was God too, how she evengot that job.
Speaker 4 (21:24):
But anyway, say unqualified, but just be in
there.
Just
Speaker 2 (21:27):
be in there.
And
Speaker 4 (21:28):
I love that for us though,
Speaker 2 (21:30):
being the best assistant that that company has
ever had.
Oh, and only working for me andwhatever, all these things.
Mm-hmm.
So, um.
So she was really like, go, go,go, go.
She loves you, but go aheadthing girl.
Yeah.
All these things like theopportunity to create, you know,
the environment that you wantand blah, blah, blah, blah,
blah.
She's really enthusiastic.
(21:50):
And then my other friend and ourlittle, you know, group from
church, she was talk, we weretalking about, we would go to
church and then go back to myfriend Sylvia's house and watch
movies.
Yes.
And then go to night service orwhatever.
So, um.
So there's an Indiana Jonesfilm.
Yeah.
Where you know, Indy's runninglike from the Nazis or somebody
(22:12):
and he gets to this cavern andhe's checking the map and the
map shows stairs, right?
But he gets there and there's nostairs, so he's like, oh,
somebody blow up the stairs and.
You know, he tries everyincantation, every whatever.
You know his whip that he has?
(22:33):
Yeah.
It's not long enough to goacross the thing.
And he's like, what do you know?
What do you do?
What?
What happens now?
What do you do?
And he puts his foot out.
And when he puts his foot out, astair comes, a step comes
Speaker (22:47):
Tracy,
Speaker 2 (22:51):
and he puts it back.
Stair disappears.
So he puts it out again and thestair comes and he puts the
second foot out and anotherright, another step comes.
And when she said that, all Icould say was, thank you, Lord.
Speaker (23:10):
Oh.
Speaker 2 (23:11):
So I put my foot out crazy.
Speaker (23:13):
That's so profound, right?
Because I think it's put my footout so profound because I think
often, Ooh, that gave me chills.
God, no, because.
I think often we think faithmeans being still and waiting
for it to show up at your door,meet you with your car, right to
click,
Speaker 2 (23:32):
kick you over the head and be obvious.
And yes, yeah, the neon sign tosay yes.
You know, faith
Speaker (23:37):
is really
Speaker 2 (23:38):
faith.
Speaker (23:38):
Faith and taking action.
Speaker 2 (23:41):
Faith is.
Faith is what is the life thatyou want?
What is the love that you want?
Yeah.
What is the healing that youwant?
Now go do it.
Speaker (23:52):
Ooh.
And with no assurance other thanmy love for you think.
Speaker 2 (23:56):
Yes.
Think about it like theapostles.
The saints didn't always have,you know, they didn't always
fast and pray and blah, blah,blah.
And the lockdown or whateverthey have faith.
This is how the Lord acts.
This is how the Lord exists.
And
Speaker (24:12):
I know for certain he will show up.
Speaker 2 (24:14):
So I'm David, I'm gonna go.
They about to attack.
I don't have time.
Speaker 5 (24:18):
To slaughter a goat and whatever.
I gotta goat, right?
Yeah.
But I have faith and I carrythat faith into everything,
every space that I'm in.
Speaker 6 (24:31):
Oh, I know that was a word for you when she was like,
you gotta put your foot out.
She,
Speaker 5 (24:35):
we were just talking about it, but she wasn't
ministering to me.
Yes.
Speaker 6 (24:39):
But she was, but we
Speaker 5 (24:39):
were, she was ministering to me.
Right.
So I said, okay, and I went tothe Lord and I was like, okay,
I'm in it.
What are we doing now?
Ooh, shit.
Scare.
So once you do that, yes.
God has a sense of humor.
Oh, we allall know that, right?
Speaker 6 (24:56):
I always listen, I always tell you.
He be, he.
No, no.
A joke, joke.
He,
Speaker 5 (24:59):
he,
Speaker 6 (25:00):
I think he love a test.
What you mean?
Oh,
Speaker 5 (25:03):
oh no, you in this for real, God is like a dj.
Like, ha haha.
They really, they really go up.
They gonna dance all night onthis one.
Okay.
So the first thing was, okay, somy business partner.
Takes me to the number oneentertainment building in la
Yeah.
And he is like, okay, this iswhere your office is gonna be.
(25:24):
Yeah.
This is what he says.
Ooh.
I'm like, okay, great.
All right.
All right.
Now the Lord had given me a wordand he said, I'm taking you to a
new place.
We're building a new place.
Do not take anything from thesepeople.
Now, you know when you leave ajob to go to another job?
Yes.
Yes.
You might take your favoritepen, listen or stapler or
(25:47):
whatever,
Speaker 6 (25:47):
listen.
Speaker 5 (25:48):
Right.
That's normal.
Your
Speaker 6 (25:49):
favorite.
Yes, for sure.
Speaker 5 (25:50):
That's normal.
Nobody is upset,
Speaker 6 (25:52):
nobody walking, nobody would.
They expect you to take somesloppy paper.
Your favorite pen.
Okay.
Right
Speaker 5 (25:56):
now in my industry, when agents leave, you take all
your files, your contracts, ofcourse, your client's
information.
Yes.
All of this stuff technicallyillegal, but everybody knows
you're not right.
Speaker 6 (26:09):
You not just gonna hand them yo, you not just
saying, oh, Rolodex, whatever.
Exactly.
I'm not gonna hand them yourRolodex to go and try to No, I
totally, that makes sense,
Speaker 5 (26:16):
right?
So, but the Lord was very clear.
Don't take anything.
That's theirs.
Everything.
That is theirs.
Take, leave it.
I mean, everything that'stheirs.
Leave it.
Okay.
I'm going to do this very, veryclear in my spirit.
Okay.
So I have, you know, let's say50 clients that I look after.
(26:38):
Yeah.
The only clients that I toldthat I was even quitting were
the seven that I brought to theagency.
Who no longer had contracts atthe agency.
Those were the only ones I evenspoke to, and I invited them to
move with me.
Yeah.
Everybody else I didn't contact.
Now that does not happen in our,I was
Speaker 6 (26:57):
about to say,'cause technically you're leaving your
revenue, you're giving them yourrevenue, not
Speaker 5 (27:02):
tech.
Yes, a hundred percent.
I said,
Speaker 6 (27:04):
not technically, girl.
That's what I did.
I said, that's what I did.
Speaker 5 (27:07):
That's exactly what I did.
Now this manifests all for me.
Oh.
But I just, no, no, no.
You
Speaker 6 (27:12):
gotta see how that.
Speaker 5 (27:14):
No, no, it gets better.
That's nothing.
That's nothing.
So I had an assistant mm-hmm.
And a young white, straight man.
Mm-hmm.
Right?
And, um, he knew that I had beenlooking for work.
Yeah.
And.
Because he's getting calls from,you know,
Speaker 6 (27:33):
yes.
Different agencies.
Agencies and whatever.
You know, he, he doing a littlemath, he doing, he picking up
what's funny, what you put down.
Right.
Speaker 5 (27:39):
But I haven't said anything to him.
Yes.
Right.
And agents do speak to oneanother, so.
Yeah.
Right.
So, uh, he hasn't said anything.
And then one day he comes in myoffice and he goes, when are we
leaving?
And I said, who not heavy on thewe.
Tracy said, and I said, um.
And by the way, the other thingabout him is he is, um.
(28:05):
What do you call, I mean, I, I'mforgetting the term, but his
family is very well off.
Okay.
He doesn't have to work.
They call
Speaker 6 (28:11):
them nle babies now.
But I just feel like theirparents did what they supposed
to be doing.
'cause listen, his parents arenot God willing.
My baby's gonna be nipplebabies.
You hear me?
I'm telling y'all that rightnow.
His and ain't no shame in there.
His parents
Speaker 5 (28:21):
are not in the business.
But he didn't have to work.
He did not have to, but he
Speaker 6 (28:24):
wanted to.
That makes, makes it great.
Speaker 5 (28:26):
He did not have a job.
Okay?
He did not have to have a job.
Okay, so when are we leaving?
And I was like.
You know what?
You stay at a grown.
Literally, I said to him, youstay at a grown folks business.
Go out there and do because
Speaker 6 (28:35):
you like I'm I'm, or I'm, I need to make mortgages
suit.
Rent is a goat.
Like, don't be over here talkingabout what we leaving
Speaker 5 (28:43):
you over here plead.
So he said, okay, this is whatwe're gonna do.
When you have everything sorted,you let me know.
Okay?
And I said, uh, okay.
Okay.
All right.
And then I started, you know,like packing up my pictures or
(29:05):
books that I had and you know,little keepsakes or whatever.
And so every day for two weeks,he would help me carry yourself,
my keepsakes or whatever out ofmy office and put them into my
car.
Yeah.
And.
Then one day, one Tuesday, Icalled him from the car and I
said, okay, today is the day.
(29:29):
Um, I'm turning in my key card.
I'm gonna give notice.
And he is like, okay, great.
No problem.
Um, I'll meet you at the office.
And I said, what do you mean?
And he goes, yeah, I'll meet youat your office.
At your new office.
Speaker 6 (29:42):
Girl, he already had a plan.
He like, we leaving you, youdon't.
So he said, we leaving it Tracy.
So
Speaker 5 (29:49):
he gave notice and left, and by the time I got
there to turn in everything,yes, he had already quit.
And then he said, wait, I wentto the new office that had
already been set up by himbecause he was my assistant.
He figured out where I wasgoing, had a conversation.
(30:11):
With Jed, set up the new office,computer system, everything,
software, everything,everything.
Every, do you
Speaker 6 (30:19):
see?
Do you see the blessing?
Speaker 5 (30:21):
Well, no.
No.
Gets better.
Gets better.
Now you're not gonna believe thethe next part because it is so,
but it's a mirror.
Whatever.
Yeah.
So everything's set up.
Computer system, active data inthe system.
Data in the system.
'cause he said.
Oh, your contracts with themsays one thing.
(30:42):
Mine says something else.
Speaker 6 (30:46):
What?
Speaker 5 (30:47):
Okay.
Speaker 6 (30:48):
Do so.
Oh my
Speaker 5 (30:50):
gosh.
So he had set up a new officethe way that I liked it, except
for one thing.
Yeah.
My chair.
Yeah.
I had a, um, Herman Millerchair.
It's about a$1,500 chair.
Yeah, right.
And, um, I said, oh.
You got this little picnicchair,
Speaker 6 (31:11):
not you running down to the people at Staples in
office.
Max talking about you gonnagimme this regulated chip.
Yeah.
Speaker 5 (31:15):
How you gonna do all this chip?
Speaker 6 (31:17):
Not like,
Speaker 5 (31:18):
so, uh, so I said, oh, I'll just, you know, I said
I'll call the office.
The chair is used.
Yeah.
I bought it on eBay.
Yeah.
They'll, you know, maybe they'llsell the chair to me for like
$500 or something.
Right.
And then I remember what theLord said.
Don't take anything from there.
I was like, well, God, I'mbuying it.
Speaker 6 (31:37):
Yeah.
Like I ain't really taking it.
Yeah.
It's a transaction.
I'm
Speaker 5 (31:40):
buying it.
And I said, this man justinvested all this money in me.
I don't want him to be like, andshe bought a$1,500 chair.
Right.
This is what she spending mymoney on.
Like, right.
So$1,500 chair.
So, um, so did you call about
Speaker 6 (31:57):
the chair or you went
Speaker 5 (31:59):
chair?
I, I.
I was about to, you know, I didcall, I didn't leave a message.
Mm-hmm.
'cause the message from the Lordplayed in my mind.
And, um, then, uh, a few dayslater, mm-hmm.
Maybe two days later,'cause I'mmeeting with people or whatever.
Yeah.
Sitting on a little ricketychair, a box came and it was a
(32:21):
Herman Miller Aron chair.
And they come in sizes.
Yeah.
And it was my size.
And you know, they come withdifferent attachments and it
was, I, you know, it had all theattachments that I wanted and I
thought, oh, you know, Nikolaiordered a chair, chair, Nikolai,
Hey, thanks for the chair.
He goes, I didn't order a chair.
You told me not to order thechair because you were concerned
(32:41):
you wanted, but yeah.
Yeah.
And I said, oh.
So I went to the office, wentaround the office.
Did anybody order this chair?
Maybe somebody else's chair.
Nobody ordered the chair.
Okay.
All right.
I built a chair.
I put it up, and then mybusiness partner said, Hey, I
want you to come to New York andI want you to meet, you know the
other people in my office.
Maybe there's some businessthere for you.
(33:02):
So I show up at his office and Iwalk into a conference room and
there were 25 Herman Miller.
Cheers, Aaron chairs.
And I wanted to cry'cause I waslike.
I not only am thinking so small,like God has moved me to the
land of milk and hunt.
That's the way those chairs feltfor me.
(33:23):
Like I'm moving from a placewhere God.
Speaker 6 (33:26):
And you see how small you was thinking, girl, you
wanted to pay$500 for the usedchair and you didn't even
realize.
God is like, look, he alignedyou with somebody.
That baby them chairs is somechairs that's, this is a, it's a
chair.
It's a chair.
Speaker 5 (33:40):
We're making 10, 20, 30.
The plan is to make 40,$50million.
And you think I'm concernedabout a$1,500 chair.
Speaker 6 (33:47):
Oh, Tracy.
And it also again, like, it alsolike
Speaker 5 (33:51):
I got you.
Speaker 6 (33:53):
I I got you.
And stop it.
Speaker 7 (33:56):
Stop thinking so small.
Stop thinking you know what'sgoing on.
I told you, if you put your footin front of the other, I will
give you steps.
Jesus.
Oh my God, God.
Speaker 8 (34:08):
Like as
Speaker 6 (34:09):
So I learned to
Speaker 5 (34:10):
like as a human from time to time, I'm still gonna be
afraid.
Yes.
'cause
Speaker 6 (34:14):
we're human, but I'm not gonna be
Speaker 5 (34:15):
afraid of the$1,500 tricks.
Oh, not the 1500 tricks.
No, no.
Let me be afraid.
Of the$10 million tricks.
Yes.
The$20 million tricks.
Right.
Let me be afraid like.
The Lord just changed yourwhole, my whole frame of
reference.
Yes.
Like when I say, I got you, Igot you on the teeny tiny and I
(34:37):
got you on the bigger than youcould ever dream for yourself.
Yes.
Speaker 6 (34:42):
And you know I say that all the time that'cause I
feel like I'm a true dreamer.
Like I sit down and I'm avisionary.
I, I will let my, well let's do
Speaker 5 (34:51):
run, let's do some dreaming together.
Oh, I do something calledmindset movies.
Yes.
Like instead of making a, um,what do they call those boards?
Speaker 6 (35:01):
Like, uh Oh, I know what you're talking about.
A vision board.
Speaker 5 (35:04):
A vision board, yes.
I don't make vision boards.
I make vision movies.
I make mindset movies.
Ooh.
So I decide what I want for theyear.
Yes.
And then I do stuff like,
Speaker 6 (35:15):
you make a movie.
Speaker 5 (35:16):
I make a movie.
Speaker 6 (35:17):
And do you, how frequently do you watch, said
movie
Speaker 5 (35:19):
every day.
Speaker 6 (35:22):
What?
See?
Okay.
So.
Oh my God, this has giving meshows.
So let me tell you about thisactivity.
I wanna see your movie beforeyou showed me, because I don't,
I don't want it to be what Iused to
Speaker 8 (35:32):
grew up in circumstances where I had to be
Speaker 7 (35:36):
rough
Speaker 8 (35:36):
in the
Speaker 7 (35:36):
jungle.
Listen, listen.
And a no limit soldier.
You hear me?
No.
Yes.
Like, and so throughout thistime I'm also like very
disciplined and I'm also like, Idon't, I, I work for what I
have.
I, I don't want no freehandouts.
God sends what I work for what Ihave, because I don't wanna be
obligated to anything that's nottied to goodness.
(35:59):
You know what I mean?
And so what I used to do in likemy darkest moments, I would
visualize in deep detail what mylife would be like when his
vision for me showed up.
And Tracy, when I say deepdetail, oh it makes me
emotional, like.
(36:19):
I used to think about when Iopened my eyes in the morning,
what would I see?
How would my bedroom look?
How would I brush my teeth?
How would I have breakfast?
What would my days be?
What would I be hearing?
These are the things that buildmy spirit in the darkest styles
of my life.
Like that's why I have such acomplex relationship with like
(36:42):
food and way I operate.
I've always kind of worked onlike Nimble and what needs to
happen, like what am I gonna dotoday for that vision of Sneak
Tomorrow?
And I took the detail where I'dbe like, oh, I want to brush my
teeth with.
Holgate, peppermint.
It'll be electric tooth rush, mybathroom will be marble.
(37:06):
These are levels of detail thatI feel like distracted me from
my reality, and it's, it makesme emotional'cause not
consciously thinking about it.
It is the life I live in.
Amen.
So the, every time I even thinkabout it, amen.
Tracy.
(37:26):
It.
So without planning, this is not
Speaker 8 (37:30):
like, no, you don't have the freedom of the Lord.
Like little things, you know, Iremember Saturday mornings they
would show these movies from thesixties wherever.
I grew up watching, you know,James Bond Crazy films on
Saturdays.
And I remember seeing him driveto Aston Martin and I told my
dad,
Speaker 5 (37:46):
Oh, that car.
I like that car.
And he's like, oh, you can haveit.
You just have to work hard.
It's expensive.
And now I drive a Aston Martin.
And I didn't, it wasn't like agoal for me.
Yes, it was.
Speaker 6 (38:00):
It wasn't something that I was like, I, I'm
Speaker 5 (38:02):
focused now.
I know I made it.
Yes.
Speaker 6 (38:04):
It, it was, it, it was something that, it kept me,
Speaker 5 (38:10):
me, it, it was, it
Speaker 6 (38:11):
comforted me in the darkest moments.
Mm.
And I just.
It was just things that I toldmyself that I in detail
Speaker 5 (38:18):
the Lord, I will like do something or be at the place
and then it'll come to my mind.
How at a point in my life Iwanted this.
Or I was really working for itand then life happened and I
forgot about it.
And when I bought this car, itliterally was like the city had
towed my Lexus.
(38:39):
Okay.
The city had towed my Lexus andI had to buy a car.
Yes.
So I was like, okay, let me, oh,I tried the new Lexus.
I don't like that body.
Yes.
Okay, well let me try this.
I tried, like, I kept tryingdifferent cars and none of them
were, were what I wanted and Ithought.
And Aston Martin, they came outwith a SUV.
(39:00):
I was like, girl, that car costsmore than your house.
Yes.
And I said to God, like, can Ibuy this car?
Like I said, look, if it am Itripping.
Right?
If it, I said if it fits, if I,my big behind gets in it.
Yes.
And it's comfortable.
I'm gonna buy this car.
Are we, are we being, are webeing,'cause it was, the
pandemic money was not comingin.
All of that.
(39:21):
I got in that car and I waslike, oh, I'm home.
Oh, I'm home.
I gave them the man, my AmericanExpress.
It's you like, run it up.
Run it up.
Put the car on the AmericanExpress.
Speaker 6 (39:30):
Run it up.
I'm gonna have
Speaker 5 (39:31):
hella points.
Yes.
Speaker 6 (39:33):
I'm gonna take a few trips over this car right here.
Speaker 5 (39:37):
That was it.
Yeah.
So that was my, that's how westarted the agency and
Speaker 6 (39:43):
oh, now I need to see this, my movie.
Speaker 5 (39:45):
Oh yes.
So, you know, we pray over.
Yes, I pray over every clientthat we signed and whatever.
It's been a, a amazing journey.
Um,
Speaker 6 (39:55):
what made you start these mind movies?
Speaker 5 (39:58):
Is it fun?
I haven't shown this to anybodyelse.
You're the only one, so youcannot I feel privileged.
You cannot comment.
I feel
Speaker 6 (40:04):
so privileged.
No, I'm not commenting.
You guys can't see.
This is, Nope.
You can't.
This is
Speaker 5 (40:07):
just for her.
Speaker 6 (40:08):
That is beautiful because it takes a level of
consciousness to put that videotogether.
Speaker 5 (40:14):
I just always, I go back to you a lot of times too,
that we don't even have a rightto call what we believe, faith,
because the Lord says, try me.
Hmm.
Right, and we've all tried him.
Our faith is based on Godshowing up.
It's not based on, yeah, just Ibelieve how we
Speaker 6 (40:32):
operate and listen,
Speaker 5 (40:34):
it's based on like how many times I've been in a
spot and prayed and he's rescuedme how many times I needed
provision.
And provision has arrived.
Right?
It's based on him doing.
Speaker 6 (40:47):
Yes.
So how is it Faith?
My question to you is, so everytime fear shows up.
And he go, ha, how is that notjust reaffirmed your faith, but
also showed you what thedefinition of fear really is.
Speaker 5 (41:07):
One thing is a lot of times I'm gonna say anybody
else, I'm afraid and I don'trealize it, I gotta recognize
that it's fair.
Yeah.
That it's fear and then I knowwhat to do.
To, you know, rip it apart, tobreak it down.
Speaker 6 (41:27):
How did, when do you reflect and go, oh, that was
fair.
That was, that was me being afair,
Speaker 5 (41:32):
I think that's, you know, journaling, that's prayer,
that's fasting, that's beingreflective and really trying to
do the work and be honest withyourself.
You know, why aren't even when Idon't like somebody, right?
Yeah.
I'm thinking.
That person didn't do anythingto me.
Why don't I like him?
Speaker 6 (41:53):
Listen, in Caribbean culture, it'd be like Miss
Spirit n you if Miss Spirit necyou.
That is a valid reason.
But truly though,
Speaker 5 (42:02):
right?
What?
Truly, because a lot, a lot oftimes I don't like that person
'cause I feel like they might besmarter than me or whatever.
Right?
But so to analyze those things,to face my own fears stuff.
Mm-hmm.
Yeah.
My own fears and then I get tochange it.
Uh Right.
I give it to the Lord and I lethim use it, and he normally
(42:23):
creates something
Speaker 6 (42:24):
better
Speaker 5 (42:25):
golden for me.
Speaker 6 (42:27):
Oh,
Speaker 5 (42:28):
right.
He's able to take all of thosefears and turn them around so
that they benefit me.
Speaker 6 (42:34):
Oh my.
Speaker 5 (42:35):
So you wanna take, it gives you the courage to like.
Go out in the world and be boldbecause every hesitation, every
fear I have, I'm gonna give itto God and he's gonna turn it
around into something for mybenefit.
So what do I really have to fear
Speaker 6 (42:52):
and why?
And why are we so damn stubbornabout it too?
Speaker 5 (42:55):
Because it's hard to remember.
Like we are physical.
We live in this physical world.
Speaker 6 (42:59):
Yeah, we're humans.
Humans be human.
Speaker 5 (43:00):
And the things that I'm saying right now, I know
how.
Naive.
I sound or provincial or,
Speaker 6 (43:06):
but it's not, and that's where I'm just like, but
it's not naive.
And I always say I'm a walkintestimony
Speaker 5 (43:13):
if you're a believer.
Yeah.
It's not, it's not naive, butlike this, this conversation is
gonna go out into the universe.
Yeah.
And then someone is gonna saysomething very funny and quippy
and Yeah, yeah, yeah.
I've never known her representme like she blah.
Right.
And yeah.
And that's gonna hurt myfeelings and you know, I,
whatever ever.
(43:33):
But it'll also encourage
Speaker 6 (43:35):
Yeah, someone, someone else to move past.
Right.
And still take action.
And
Speaker 5 (43:39):
it is the truth.
Yes.
Right?
Like I am.
I do, I'm blessed.
I have a good brain.
I'm hardworking.
Yes.
But I'm not perfect.
Speaker 6 (43:48):
But no one is
Speaker 5 (43:49):
I, but even that, I'm not perfect.
But
Speaker 6 (43:51):
even perfection and even perfection.
Is criticized.
Speaker 5 (43:56):
Well, yeah, that's true.
Speaker 6 (43:57):
Like, but you have to realize that that's not your
real gauge Things
Speaker 5 (44:00):
that I have, the things that I have done Yeah.
Are by the grace of God.
Yeah.
And in everything, all I can do,all I'm here to do is I show up,
I educate myself.
I do the best job that I can do.
Yeah.
That I can be.
And that that is not only has itbeen good enough, it's been
extraordinary.
Speaker 6 (44:19):
And that is your excellence.
But I just, but I also think.
In thinking of that, like, yeah,someone's gonna watch this and
be like, yeah, that's naive, dada da da.
You.
It's also recognizing that,that, that ability to go, yeah,
that's naive.
That's, and to be negative,baby, you're fearful, you're,
you're fear.
(44:40):
You are afraid of your ownpotential.
And that's what that is.
So how the, I'm, I always saylike, I'm not her.
I'm not her.
'cause I'm like, oh, who hurtyou?
What in your life made you feellike prosperity is not deserved
to everybody?
Speaker 5 (44:57):
Or that, like, my method, since my method is
different than yours, it's notas valid, but anyway.
Yeah.
But that's, that's, but
Speaker 6 (45:03):
that's the whole, and that's honestly, that's, that's
the Tracy experience.
That's also the premise of thispodcast.
That's the reason we had theseconversations.
Because your definition of fairshould be different for
everybody.
Mm-hmm.
Mm-hmm.
And it, for each individual thatdefinition transforms.
It does not mean the same thingin every single season of your
(45:24):
life.
So does that mean you're betterthan someone else?
Does that mean their definitionis better than your definition?
No, but, and also moreimportantly, does that mean that
you cannot learn from mydefinition
Speaker 5 (45:34):
for damn Sure.
Speaker 6 (45:35):
Exactly.
One
Speaker 5 (45:36):
thing that I am afraid of now is I remember.
A 20-year-old Tracy and youknow, your aunties and older
people try to tell you somethingand you're polite and you're
listening.
Yeah.
Right.
But if I knew then what I knownow, I would, I would be, you
know, I can't even
Speaker 6 (45:56):
In your mind, in your mind, you would be all these
different places, but God islike you.
Exactly.
Where I want.
Where I want you to.
It's true.
You exactly where I want to.
You got it when I wanted you tohave it.
You got it when I wanted you.
'cause I also think part of.
This new age of all thisinformation and access to
conversations and people thatyou wouldn't get their stories
just being in your own bubble.
Speaker 5 (46:16):
Mm-hmm.
Speaker 6 (46:17):
Part of that, the, the greatness of that is
understanding that when you getit is when you're supposed to
get it.
Speaker 5 (46:24):
You're right.
That's a word.
That's the word, but I wantyoung women to know like.
Jump.
Jump, yes.
Do what is the thing that youwanna do.
Do it.
Speaker 6 (46:36):
Yep.
Speaker 5 (46:36):
Right.
Don't wait till you're,
Speaker 6 (46:38):
till you're older to try to do it.
But also not knowing the dream,not knowing where you want to
go, should not paralyze you tomove forward.
Speaker 5 (46:49):
Okay?
So all of you guys, the smartestthing that was said in this
conversation today, she justsaid.
Not knowing where you wanna goshould not paralyze you.
You have to, you're like ashark.
If you stop moving forward,you're dead.
You need to put one foot infront of the other every single
(47:10):
day.
The length of the stride doesn'tmatter, but every single day,
make a move forward.
Speaker 6 (47:16):
Yeah.
Do something.
It's not about the direction.
It's always about the.
The details.
Okay.
Speaker 5 (47:21):
\Thank you so much
Speaker 6 (47:21):
for this conversation.
This was so amazing and no
Speaker 5 (47:25):
thank you.
Speaker 6 (47:26):
Oh, and this is, thank you.
How do you divide?
Fair.
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