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In this episode of I’ll Meet You There, our host Paige Nolan sits down with Amy Wilson, author of Happy to Help, to explore the complexities of being a helper and overachiever, especially for women. Amy dives into the cultural expectations and personal struggles tied to constantly taking on responsibilities and fixing problems, offering thought-provoking insights from her book.
Their conversation touches on the challenges of worry, perfectionism, and the importance of self-compassion. Amy emphasizes the need to create space, embrace uncertainty, and accept imperfection as part of life. Her reflections provide a thoughtful examination of how to balance the desire to help with maintaining personal boundaries and well-being.
What We Explored This Episode
05:07 Juggling life's responsibilities: When does it start?
11:14 Childhood experiences shaping helper mentality
18:29 Worry's role in over-helping and motherhood
24:32 Changing family dynamics through writing process
30:26 Relationship challenges and perfectionism tendencies
36:09 Worry as a badge of good motherhood
42:16 College admissions process complexities for parents
48:36 Learning to let conflicts exist without explanation
54:05 Conclusion: Creating space for change and uncertainty
Memorable Quotes
"It's a neat trick that we do both take on the work of caring so much for everybody around us and buy into the idea that it's because we're just better at it. And then when we say, wait a minute, I don't think I can handle this, to be told back that it's our fault for making it this way."
“We take on so much of this. If only I was a better person, if only I could work on this part of myself. We just so readily accept that there is some failing in us that's causing our lives to be unsatisfying. You need help, a redistribution of the situation.”
"Leave more space for things. I'm going to pause and wait and see what happens. That's the path to change.”
Resources Mentioned
Happy to Help: Adventures of a People Pleaser by Amy Wilson - https://www.amywilson.com/
Natalia Imperatori-Lee - https://manhattan.edu/campus-directory/natalia.lee
Connect with Amy
Website: https://amywilson.com
LinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/in/amywlsn/
Instagram: https://instagram.com/amywlsn
Listen to Amy’s Podcast: https://www.whatfreshhellpodcast.com/
Connect with Paige
Website - https://paigenolan.com/
Instagram - https://www.instagram.com/paigenolanwrite
Facebook - https://www.facebook.com/paigenolanwriter
LinkedIn - https://www.linkedin.com/in/paige-nolan-0932751/
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