E24 - Audrina Patridge - IPV and Me: My Journey with Domestic Abuse

Episode Transcript
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(00:00):
Hello guys, can you believe it? I am back recording! I'm so excited to be back, I can't

(00:17):
even tell you and I apologise so much for being absent for the last few months and for
not really keeping you updated. Honestly, there's been a million reasons why, the main
reason being, so at the end of April, so in my apartment where I live, it's actually

(00:43):
a house that's divided between the house and then I have an apartment on like the ground
floor slash basement and my landlord and his family, friends, have upstairs and he's
been doing renovations which he didn't know they were going to last this long, I don't
think anybody knew but it's been going on since the end of April, it is now over what?

(01:04):
Almost two weeks into August and they've only just finished so every single day, like Sunday
to Sunday, every single week, it's been a million guys here in the backyard, in and
out of my apartment because I have access to the boiler room, electrics and different

(01:25):
things like that and then upstairs it's like at one point I thought the house was falling
down around me, it was so loud, there's constant stuff going on so I heard between the noise
and people in and out of my apartment, I just literally had no time at all to record anything.
So when I was last speaking to you, I was just getting ready to go to Ireland for a

(01:49):
couple of weeks and did that, I can't say it was a great time, I can't say it was a
bad time, there was a lot going on, we had a lot going on with family members, friends
and things like that, health things and then I had my own issue when I went to Ireland

(02:10):
so I was there for like two, three days and went horse riding, had a fall, pretty bad
fall, I don't know how but after I fell off the horse, I got on the horse again and went
off for like two hours on this trail ride even though I was in so much pain, my sister's

(02:35):
boyfriend was with us and he is a doctor so he was able to check me over and everything
before I got back on the horse but I was so determined because I was like if I don't get
on this horse right now again, I'm never ever ever ever gonna get on a horse, I don't want
this to end up being a fear of mine, I hadn't been on a horse since I was a kid but my sister
works with horses so I was like I need to do this and I got back on and like I think

(02:56):
even my sister I think was really surprised at me so I was determined and then afterwards
we went and got lunch, all I wanted was alcohol and I realised after a while I went to the
bathroom and I could not like move to sit down like it was agony and after that the
pain got steadily worse, I ended up breaking down crying like I was in so much pain so

(03:22):
I went to the ER, I was seen pretty much straight away which in Ireland if you're familiar you
can be literally just in the waiting room for about 10 hours or more because it's not
the greatest system that we have, it's not expensive but it's definitely, it's definitely

(03:43):
not the best in terms of wait times so I got seen right away because I had a gash on my
head and I had some neck pain and they were obviously worried that I had a spinal injury
so yeah so went in did a bunch of tests so it was there all night, had MRIs and X-rays

(04:06):
and all of that done, I had like I was in so much pain everywhere I was in a neck brace
because obviously they didn't want me to move, it would have been scary only for the fact
that I think the drugs that they gave me just really calmed me and relaxed me so much and
I got out, I ended up getting out at like I think it was 2am or something and they told

(04:27):
me I was fine, I was just going to be you know bruised and probably in pain for the
next few days so I ended up being in pain so this happened in the middle of May, the
pain did not stop until about I would say 3 or 4 weeks ago and my sister like who I

(04:49):
said has worked with horses basically since she was a kid she has had numerous falls and
injuries and she even said I've never been in pain this much for this long after a fall
so I will get back to that later so I was basically just putting up with the pain for
a while I was off of work as well on sick leave because of it and I also when I was

(05:16):
in Ireland I had a lot of like digestive issues, this tends to happen to me anyway in general
because I think having lived in America for so long I could have lived here for 11 years
now you know you get used to the food here like the food here is so processed in this
country and then when I go back to Ireland whenever I go back to Ireland I tend to like

(05:37):
it takes me a little bit from my body to adjust to the food again because it's very different
it's a lot more like fresh or natural in Ireland I think particularly like dairy products and
things like that I always find a big difference with and so I was having a lot but this was
kind of on a whole other level like I just did not I enjoy the trip but like I was just
in so much pain and I was so uncomfortable for the whole time I was there that it just

(06:01):
was like it just I couldn't fully enjoy it as much as I wanted to and then when I got
back like normally once I get back here you know my digestion is normal again whatever
but I was just every time I ate something I was crazy like the bloating did not stop
I was constantly bloated and just really uncomfortable and in pain so yeah so that's another thing

(06:29):
that was happening with me so I went back to work for one day got called for jury duty
got picked for jury duty and they told us the case was going to be for over a month
so pretty much the whole of July I was in jury duty I actually really enjoyed that process
I know people always say they want to get out of jury duty and that's always the big

(06:49):
thing like oh no I got caught for jury duty whatever I actually really enjoyed it I was
in with a great bunch of jurors I was actually the only woman juror which was a really interesting
it was a medical malpractice case is very very very interesting I actually really loved
being a part of it it ended up in the end after the whole month that we didn't have to

(07:12):
make the decision amongst ourselves they actually ended up settling the case and they said they
settled this the juror the judge told us they settled it because the lawyers could not get
a read on us as jury they said like they couldn't read our body language they couldn't decide
which way it was going to go and therefore the insurance guy who had been there the whole

(07:34):
time decided to settle the case so that was really interesting and we got to talk to the
lawyers afterwards we got to talk to the the doctor and the plaintiffs who were involved
there was a really really interesting process I actually really enjoyed it and I kind of
miss it now I'm not gonna lie it was it was a really really really interesting time so

(07:56):
towards the end of my jury duty probably in the last week I was there I started feeling
really ill again like my stomach I won't get into too much gory details but I basically
had some bleeding where one should not be bleeding so went to it was a Friday evening

(08:16):
went to a city MD and the doctor there like literally said right away to me you need to
go to the emergency room right now and she taught me that she suspected it may be ulcerative
colitis and I already knew that term because actually my dad had ulcerative colitis he

(08:40):
was diagnosed in his 20s my mom taught me and it is a hereditary illness that you get
so and then I also found out that his sister has it also and so that's really interesting
I always find that kind of fascinating that you can and hurt like things like that my mom
like stalking me that I get all the bad things about me from my dad's side of the family

(09:02):
which is probably a typical mom thing to say so went to the emergency room and I have to
say they were amazing like I was never treated with such good care than I was in this hospital
that I went to and I ended up having to be admitted and I stayed there until this is

(09:23):
Friday evening I think I got out on Sunday evening and yeah so I was doing like a million
tests cat scans everything and basically I saw a bunch of different doctors they all
said that they suspected that it was colitis I also had an inflamed appendix which was
kind of scary because I've known a lot of people that have had like burst appendix and

(09:48):
things like that and I know it's really dangerous as well as really painful but they said that
colitis can actually cause an inflamed appendix so they didn't think that it would have to
be removed or anything and they just kept monitoring it so basically the last it's been
what three weeks now I've just kind of been in a lot of pain like every time I've been

(10:09):
eating it's just like so it's my left and my right side so basically every time I eat
anything it's just like burning it kind of feels like if someone lit a match inside
of your colon that sort of feels like it's like a constant burning pain and so last
week I had the joy of having my first colonoscopy I don't know if you guys have ever had to do

(10:31):
that but all my days so the colonoscopy itself is fine you're completely stated didn't even
know what was happening it was all good and but the beforehand oh my god it was awful
so I'd had to be on a low fiber diet basically since I was in hospital and then gradually
throughout the week there was certain days like okay so today you're gonna cut out like

(10:52):
nuts and grains and then tomorrow you can have any vegetables so it was kind of like
that and then the last day I had to have to be on a clear liquid diet and then the dreaded
prep oh my god guys if you've had to deal with this it's like two bottles of this solution
that they give you to drink which is essentially elixative so I had to start the first one

(11:14):
at 5pm and then after you drink that which it's basically because you have to add a
certain amount of water to it it's about 32 ounces and then once you have that finished
you have to drink it within an hour then you have to drink 32 ounces of water right after
that so it's a lot of liquids to consume now I got halfway through the solution I couldn't

(11:36):
do it I was gagging almost threw up so many times I was crying at one point it was horrendous
like I can't even explain to you how bad it was and I had been told it was gonna be bad
I'd seen TikTok videos of people trying to do it and saying it was awful my doctor even
told me it was awful I got loads of tips on like the best ways to like try and drink it
have a cold have it with ice sip it through a straw have a lemon to suck on in between

(12:01):
I couldn't do it so yeah so it was just awful and then I had to take the second solution
at 3am it was just it was a terrible night it was so bad I didn't get to any sleep it
was awful but then the colonoscopy itself was fine but I will say it's really really important
I don't have my results back yet I should hopefully have those any day now I'm pretty

(12:22):
sure it's gonna be colitis but you know I've kind of accepted the fact now and that's fine
but I will say colonoscopy if you need to do it just do it it's really important yeah
the prep is awful but the actual procedure itself I would say there's not only to have
any like stress about it because you don't even know what's happening you're completely
sedated you don't know what's going on and you wake up and they give you cook I got cookies

(12:48):
pretzels got water it was literally the nicest food I'd ever had my whole life I was in a
bit of pain for a few days afterwards like a lot of cramping which was to be expected
a little bit of bleeding but it's been just over a week now and I would say the last maybe
day or so I'm kind of feel like I'm settling in a little bit again so yeah so I didn't

(13:11):
mean to go on quite such a rant about that but that's just basically what's been happening
also what I meant to say and I said I was gonna go back to earlier while I was getting
the testing done while I was in the hospital they did a CT scan obviously of my abdominal
area and they found that I had a fractured rib and also I never remember what they're

(13:38):
called but you know on the side of your spine you have these little teeny little bones that
come out four of those were also fractured and that's obviously from my horse riding
fall but they somehow missed that when I was in the ER in Ireland originally so that's
why I was in so much pain for like almost three months because I was walking around

(13:58):
with fractured bones not having any idea just going about my life just in pain and barely
able to walk I couldn't even sit down sometimes standing was hard it was awful so yeah so I
would say to that if you have anything like that happened to you or anything with your
body where you feel like something isn't right oh my god just get it checked feel free to

(14:22):
second guess the doctor they're only human like ask them questions go get a second opinion
if you need to like just your health is so important and if you you know your body like
nobody yeah the doctors know like how the body works they know how to fix it and what
how to diagnose something and everything but like you're the one that knows how your body

(14:42):
feels you know how you feel day to day so if something doesn't feel right if you're in
pain or you're feeling off like me with your digestion you feel like something's wrong
it probably is because it's wrong so get a check out and yeah that would be my major
advice to you so I have had some good things happen it's not all been bad so went to this

(15:07):
is this is the main good thing that happened to me two weeks as two weeks ago tomorrow
I guess which I can't believe I feel like I've been a days since but I went to the Renaissance
tour guys oh my goodness I went to the MetLife stadium on the Saturday night with my friend
Trisha who is also a Beyonce fanatic like I am now I've seen Beyonce eight times before

(15:32):
I have followed that girl since early Destiny's Child days like I am an obsessive fan member
of the beehive love her love her love her I've loved every tour she's done she's always
amazing but this is like a whole other level like I can't even explain it like I feel like
I've been I like I've been thinking about it but I can't even process it it's just it's

(15:59):
an experience it's like it was like other worlds and I felt like I was out of my body
like it was just amazing like she is always amazing she sings amazing she performs amazing
but just to show itself like the graphics the stage set up the dancers oh my goodness

(16:22):
the dancers are so good it was just phenomenal like I can't even explain how amazing it was
and even just her herself like I feel like we got more of her personality like her actual
Beyonce real personality rather than you know she's always that like Sasha fierce like stage

(16:43):
presence and like that but her crowd interactions it just felt more like oh this is just me and
I'm just having fun and this is who I am like it was just so good and if you get a chance
to go like there's still I know some shows left I think it's running till September
like please go spend the money if you've got to spend the money spend the money like I

(17:04):
was in the nose beads in MetLife now I will say MetLife I don't think there's any bad
scenes in MetLife but nose meets it's still was phenomenal it was amazing just go if
you can go spend the money the money will always come back later but the Renaissance tour
will not so just do it honestly it's phenomenal and even more better exciting news I was

(17:30):
reached out to by this lovely lady called Clara who has a podcast called Peace Over Pieces
and I'm gonna link that in the bio so you guys can check out her Instagram she has a
book also that she's written and she has a podcast so she reached out to see if she

(17:51):
could interview me for the podcast which was so exciting and the episode went live a couple
weeks ago I really really like how it turned out and it's so exciting like if you follow
this podcast if you know me personally if you follow my Instagram you know like my main
goal in life in the last few years has been to just spread awareness spread my story and

(18:17):
to have someone like this reach out to me and allow me the space to tell my story I just
like I'm not gonna lie I shed a tear when the podcast episode was released like it was
just amazing and that's all I've ever wanted to do and please check out the episode if
you can and check out her her Instagram her other work she's she's a really great girl

(18:41):
and there's some other amazing stories on her podcast episodes as well so I definitely
recommend checking that out and please give me feedback I love to hear feedback if you
have listened to the episode please tell me and yeah so let's get on with today's episode

(19:10):
so today's episode is about Miss Audrina Patrick you may know her from the hills if you're
anything like me she was a absolute fanatical fan of the hills I still watch it every now
and again it's just one of those shows if you grow up in a certain era it's like it

(19:31):
was phenomenal it was one of those like pop culture phenomenons and Audrina was always
a very popular character she was kind of known for her poor choices I would say in men and
she's always very sweet she seemed a little naive maybe sometimes maybe a little bit too

(19:54):
trusting people but she's always quite likable and so I'm basing this book most this episode
mostly on her book which came out in 2022 I've linked that in the bio and she also did a
really great episodes podcast episode on called her daddy that I think you should check out

(20:16):
for just some a little bit more info as well I have also linked that in the bio so let's
get into it Audrina says if you see me on television in the tabloids or on social media
you might think I've got it all figured out it's such a lesson to never judge a book by
its cover or a celebrity by a tabloid picture you never really know what's going on with

(20:38):
someone behind the practice smile and the upbeat interview answers lies at depths of
sadness few people know about for several years I hid the challenges I faced and now
the carefully crafted facade is beginning to crack I'm ready to share my story for better
or worse in trying to be strong and brave for my daughter cura I learned to be strong
and brave for myself too I've been forced to know who I am and stand strong I'm just

(21:04):
now stepping into my power as a woman a mother and an entrepreneur now I don't want to be
silent anymore I want to talk about the struggles the missteps the mistakes including the regret
of letting myself stay in a relationship that I knew was damaging for far too long I share
my story in the hopes that it might help someone else struggling whether it's in a toxic situation

(21:25):
abusive relationship or any challenge that pushes you to know who you are and stand up
for it it's taken me a long time to peel away the layers of psychological and emotional
manipulation and remember who I really am it was the hardest fight of my life to get
my power back so Audrina grew up in Yorba Linda a very laid back community 20 minutes

(21:46):
from the beach her mom is a stay at home mom and her dad was an engineer for their family
business making mechanical parts for big companies she has three younger siblings Casey Samantha
and Mark Audrina loved growing up in such a quiet tight knit community they went to church
most Sundays as a family and it was here that she explored her love of performing by joining
the church's theater group she knew was what she wanted to do with her life so she started

(22:09):
taking acting classes in high school she was friendly with everyone and didn't get caught
up in the drama or gossip when they got their driver's licenses her friends and her would
go to shows whatever chance they got Audrina had always loved music and got into the punk
scene during high school she also worked at a small recording studio in Newport Beach
during her senior year an experience which would serve her well when she got to LA after

(22:32):
high school she started taking classes classes at Orange County Community College at night
and in the daytime would go to LA for auditions she landed roles in a few music videos which
gave her great experience and she got paid a hundred bucks each piece she ended up having
to decide to stick with school or move to LA to pursue modeling and acting full time
so she took a leap of faith and went to LA she found an apartment where she happened to

(22:56):
be in an elevator with her dad with two girls who were looking for a roommate they were
really nice girls but their relationship turned sour once Audrina got her role on the hills
she moved to a one bedroom which became available in the building she would lie by the pool learning
her lines for auditions this is where she met MTV producer Adam DeVillo who was there to
scout the complex for Lauren and Heidi as they were moving from San Francisco where

(23:19):
they had taken one semester of classes Lauren was getting a spin off from her soul Laguna
Beach that was still in development she had never seen the show but she knew who Lauren
was from magazines and interviews she thought DeVillo was just another cheesy producer trying
to hit on her but when he talked about the shows he worked on she thought it could be
legit just a few days later she was in the MTV offices to meet the rest of the showrunners

(23:42):
and producers they thought she would be a great fit with the other girls she thought
it would be good practice for her to get comfortable in front of the camera within a week or two
she had signed the papers and they started filming within two to three weeks the show
followed the professional and personal lives of four young women Lauren, Heidi, Whitney
and Audrina living in LA Lauren was very much the star of the show which never bothered

(24:04):
Audrina the hills premiered to a fan base eager to find out what Lauren was up to after
Laguna Beach the show became a reality TV and pop culture phenomenon that landed them
on the cover of Rolling Stone among many others and in the zeitgeist for most of her twenties
it drew some of MTV's highest ever ratings like when I tell you this show was a massive

(24:26):
worldwide massive hit in the very beginning Lauren didn't seem very open to getting to
know them she was a little quiet and withdrawn but now with here is a reality to be under
her belt Audrina can understand why she was so apprehensive to let people in right away
you never know who is using you or will turn on you to get their 15 minutes Heidi was the
totlapside and her and Audrina began hanging out even outside of filming and that was the

(24:52):
beginning starting in 2006 she spent five years discovering herself surviving bad dates
gaining and losing friendships and exploring new ambitions all while filming the hills
when she was out running errands or with friends fans started coming up to her in stores in
a restaurant to say hello she couldn't wrap her head around it it was so surreal she would
tell them just learn from my mistakes they were invited to lots of award shows including

(25:15):
the 2007 MTV video music awards where her and Lauren and Whitney were due to present
an award to Justin Timberlake Lauren and Whitney were mega fans that were so excited but Justin
wouldn't accept the award from them and instead got Chris Brown to take the award from them
who then presented it to Justin Justin then said in his speech MTV play more redam videos
we don't want to see the sims or reality television I think that meant that was meant to be the

(25:40):
simpsons that are right there it was a person attack on the girls who were devastated and
humiliated fortunately not everyone was rude and at the same show they met up with coming
out as Rihanna who was her favorite person she ever met in an award show another year
at the teen choice awards the hills won and Audrina and Lauren had to accept it they were
in shock she eventually got used to presenting at shows and learned how to set the nerves

(26:02):
aside and jump into performance mode by the end of the third season the hills was the
highest rated cable show of 2008 Audrina and the cast were party with celebrities she once
got flown to Vegas on a private jet by a prince who wanted a group of celebs at his birthday
at a club after the party she met Leonardo DiCaprio who gave her his number but they
could never make time to hang out her biggest thrill was being on the cover of Rolling Stone

(26:26):
with Heidi Lauren and Whitney it was like a dream but also had its drawbacks as the
paparazzi used to follow them everywhere they would have no concern for safety and she got
into many dangerous situations while trying to drive a big topic of discussion regarding
the hills has always been whether it is real or fake the truth says Audrina is somewhere

(26:47):
in between a lot of what they did like going to events and bars and dinners was real but
sometimes the intimate conversations and simmering tensions and blowouts were instigated by production
nothing was ever scripted it was always their own words but for example running into the
person you were fighting with at a coffee shop randomly was not so random so the fictionalising

(27:09):
came for the creation of situations that would never naturally occur it was more about turning
up the intensity than faking the emotions they would film almost year round without much
time off so excuse me this is always something I've found fascinating that people think that
reality shows that they watch are 100% real obviously I'm a big reality show fan and I

(27:32):
remember the hills was always accused of being fake and obviously the scenarios and all of
that like them running into each other is Audrina says all that to me that was so obviously fake
as if they're all going to just happen to be in the same restaurant with the person that
they've just had a falling out with or whatever so it's the same with every single reality show

(27:52):
like housewives all of that stuff like they're set up by production but it doesn't mean that
what they're saying is scripted it just means they're kind of being forced to talk about things
so that's just something I've always found kind of interesting why people think like if you're
watching the Kardashians and you think that that's real now I mentioned the Kardashians
specifically because I'm not a Kardashians fan like it's not it's come on that's been filmed a

(28:18):
couple of times and etc etc anyways I won't get into a rant about reality tv because I literally
could be here for hours talking about it it is my 100% guilty pleasure Audrina says she made a lot
of genuine friendships on the show but one that didn't last long was her relationship with Lauren
there was a lot of turmoil between them that they couldn't talk about on camera at the time

(28:41):
they had the same age and a publicist and Audrina would find out that a lot of job opportunities
meant for her were instead being given to Lauren she understood this wasn't necessarily Lauren's
fault but it wasn't great for their friendship either she also found her to be controlling her
for friends saying that if you didn't do and say what she did then you would be on the outs
Lauren also acted like she hated Justin in front of the cameras but off camera it was a different

(29:03):
story when Justin and Audrina were broken up Lauren ran into him in Vegas and according to a good
friend of Audrina as they hooked up Audrina felt so betrayed the whole situation unfolded on the show
but neither Lauren nor Justin would answer her calls or texts unless the camera was rolling
when her and Lauren finally had a conversation on camera she felt Lauren turned it around to
make her look delusional shortly after that Lauren left the show and they haven't spoken since but

(29:26):
if she runs into her somewhere she says hi okay so if you have never watched this show which I feel
like guys why have you not if you don't know who Justin is Justin was basically Audrina's on off
like they were never really boyfriend and girlfriend but like they were constantly seeing
each other not seeing each other it was a whole drama but that was basically Audrina's main

(29:50):
storyline for the whole of the Hills so this story by Justin and Lauren if you've watched Hills
like you can imagine this is true I personally don't think this is true at all I feel like again
when it comes to guys and I don't want to blame Audrina for anything um especially what you're
about to hear she goes through but I feel like she's always been that girl that will kind of believe

(30:16):
the guy above her girlfriends or like that's kind of always the vibe to me she gave off
like she was always a little bit naive about those kind of things and I I really honestly
don't think Lauren would have gone near Justin so that's just a little bit of uh
the Hills goss for you and that's my opinion on that story so the one question Audrina gets asked

(30:40):
constantly about is her relationship with Justin Bobby their tumultuous relationship was the source
of so much speculation and gossip for more than a decade they met before the Hills and had an
instant connection they became close quickly she'd never met anyone like him and they never
seemed to get bored of one another to this day she's never had the same spark with anyone else
Justin never cared what people thought of him which allowed him to do his own thing but also

(31:02):
meant he wasn't in tune with what Audrina needed from him when she would ask him if they were
together officially he would be vague and dismissive he would say let's just see what happens why do
we need a label when he started appearing on the show everything changed once his episodes aired
he began seeing what other people were saying about him and he seemed really annoyed about that
she felt like he was pulling back from her a little bit it was clear from the outset that

(31:25):
Lauren wasn't his biggest fan a result of the way she saw him treat her his worst behavior always
seemed to happen in front of Lauren he would sometimes disappear for days without a word
Audrina met the actor Chris Pine when she was at an awards ceremony for a movie she was starring in
called sorority row they exchanged numbers and after a while started dating he did like going

(31:45):
out and being followed by the paparazzi but Audrina loved to grout and was still filming the Hills so
their lifestyles were completely different but they tried until she was spotted leaving his house
and started to freak him out she knew after a couple of months she couldn't date him Justin had seen
pictures of her and Chris and started getting upset but he was always disappearing on her
and one time she even saw him kissing other the girl while they were filming for the show

(32:07):
he was playing games and Audrina would play them back at one point in 2008 she'd had enough of
him disappearing and so they were in another offstage at this time she met a BMX biker called
Cory Bowen through a mutual friend and they hung out a few times casually they were perhaps one
night hanging out on a rooftop even though all his friends were there it made it look more romantic

(32:28):
than it was the next day Justin called her upset that she was looking cozy with another guy he
expected her to sit around and wait for him to call while he was out meeting other girls
she finally called him out on his double standards
Audrina had started to put on a persona while filming for the Hills to try and keep her personal
life to herself to some degree and protect herself from editing decisions that didn't reflect her

(32:53):
at a certain point she stopped trusting the producers she knew it was their job to create
dramatic television but some of the editing made her very uncomfortable they would use voiceovers
to put a different spin on a storyline or have another person weigh in on it they would show
someone five giving a nasty look from a totally different moment that had nothing to do with the

(33:13):
conversation that was playing out she learned to develop a thick skin when hearing negativity
from tabloids or bloggers but it didn't protect her from when someone she thought she was close
to one the cast spoke badly about her she had to learn they were her tv friends and not her real
friends it was really hurtful even when she knew they were just amping it off for the cameras it
was better to just play the part instead of trying to fight the inevitable in a lot of ways the

(33:36):
toughening up she had to do helped her deal with the spotlight and attention she was receiving from
bloggers like Perez Hilton who would call her all sorts of names body shame her and make fun of
everything about her it was overwhelming honestly if again if you were like of the age where you're
paying attention to pop culture around the time that Perez Hilton was um constantly uh in the

(33:59):
media with his blog like he was so disgusting the things that he would say about people and you
know he had this famous thing of like uh he would have this white um line that he would draw over
the pictures um just to make more fun of them like he would point out flaws in their bodies like the
nickname he gave to Adrina was ceiling eyes um you which you'll famously know again if you if you

(34:24):
knew about his blogs like he was just so gross like to this day I can't stand the man I know he's
apologized for it but I don't believe him I just think he's a disgusting human being I can't stand
him so I can't imagine like being this young and dealing with like not only seeing yourself on tv
and being edited in a way that you're like that's not how that conversation went or that's not how

(34:46):
that happens and then being frustrated with that um getting shit for it on blogs from viewers and
other people in the media tabloids and then like having some gross human like Perez Hilton
and coming in just like ripping your whole body apart like it's just so gross like I can't I feel

(35:07):
so bad for any famous women who had to um grow up in that time um in the spotlight like you know
that Paris Hilton's and called Richie's um Lindsay Lohan like all those people they were just vilified
it's so gross so when Adrina had first my quarry in 2006 she found him a welcoming distraction from

(35:30):
all the drama with Justin her friend Angela took her to a party at his house he had a garfin at the
time but she could detect his charm and magnetism thought he was cute but didn't feel anything more
than that Angela started inviting her to hang out with the morafin at some point maybe a year or two
later he reached out to her on myspace to see if they could hang out and she assumed he had broken
up with his garfin she still didn't read much into it as it was always a group hangout Lauren and

(35:56):
her ended up throwing a halloween party and when she invited Corey to come she found she had butterflies
the party was being filmed for the show and production must have sent something because
they set up for her to have a date with Corey on the show Corey agreed he was nervous but attentive
and asked her lots of questions she felt different with him compared to Justin and the other guys

(36:19):
he was a gentleman she felt taken care of and secure they had their first kiss that night off
camera it was passionate and he looked at her after like he was really seeing her they went on a
few more dates after that but she knew the producers were trying to create drama because they knew
that Justin was jealous she didn't want Corey to be a pawn Corey was fun and lighthearted and never
played games they were goofballs together they ran into Justin together and of course he acted

(36:44):
immaturely antagonizing Corey by winking at Audrina he then texted her saying just know that you're
mine first and always Corey saw the text which caused a huge fight between them she and Corey
stayed in touch but weren't too serious they tried to see each other when he was in town which
wasn't that frequent he was dating other girls which she was fine with as she was still seeing
Justin and dating other guys she told him this as it didn't feel fair to lead him on he was cool

(37:08):
with it he asked her a lot of questions about herself and showed an interest in her life he
always wanted to know who she'd been with and what she'd been doing on the weekends and again like
in the beginning of the relationship you know when they're pursuing you it's all
perfect and they're always the perfect guy and then the little red flag such as her saying here

(37:31):
that he always wants to know who she'd been with she saw that as oh he's so interested in my life
but as we know that's really a red flag because he's just trying to find out information about you
he wants to know where you've been who you've been with and this is all major red flags for
what is to come she started dating the musician Ryan Cabrera toward the end of filming The Hills

(37:56):
they had been close friends for years he was so much fun and high energy they would just laugh
and dance with their friends all night he'd gotten to know her siblings and are still friends with
her brother to this day she says he is the happiest person and a joy to be around over time they felt
sparks he was always planning romantic and fun activities for them but she sometimes found his
lifestyle of always wanting to do everything a lot Ryan even lived with her for a few months

(38:20):
after he sold his house the emotional intensity was compounded by spending almost every second
together Ryan was happy to be on camera he wasn't afraid to show his feelings for her but she
felt a little stifled the dynamics of the relationship always changed when she brought
someone on the show compared to Justin Ryan was emotionally available and there for her no matter
what he was always doing things to brighten her day and was so thoughtful and romantic

(38:44):
she wasn't used to this type of treatment and consistency the flip side of that was space and
independence so part of me with this feels like if it had been Justin treating her like that which
is how she always wanted Justin to treat her then she wouldn't have felt suffocated but that just
makes me think that she wasn't actually that into Justin or that into Ryan she seems like the kind

(39:09):
of girl who kind of always has to have a guy with her and again I'm not trying to talk down about her
I'm just trying to point out you know what it kind of looks like and things that you're kind of picking
up so Ryan was a traveling musician so she would often hear stories about him talking to other

(39:29):
women he was a great guy but she couldn't shake the feeling that things weren't right and she
wasn't as head over heels as she wanted to be thankfully when she said she just wanted to be
friends he took it well and they are still friends to this day a few days after they broke up Cory
texted to say he was in town after six seasons the hills came to an end she brought Cory to the
after party yesterday as they had just rekindled their relationship a couple of months before

(39:53):
they had such a fun night she was so used to being filmed and on a schedule every day the
being alone was a shock to her system she had to relearn how to make her own choices she had to make
it official with Cory and was feeling really happy she also started going back to Orange County more
to see her family she wasn't going out as much and overall things seemed so much calmer Cory was
so focused on his BMX racing career that he was living a healthy lifestyle and wasn't partying

(40:16):
he would cook for her with sweet and charming and never short on compliments and pda's again
there's that good old love bombing he always seemed proud to have her as his girlfriend he pushed her
out of her comfort zone no one messed with her when he was around as he was six foot tall and very
athletic she felt protected she was able to fully let her guard down and again that is all the abuser

(40:37):
wants they want you to fully let your guard down so that they can get in there and do all their
things that they like to do he would talk up her career to his family in Australia and her friends
she found it hard sometimes to tell if he was into her because of her personality or because
she was famous he liked the free things from brands the free vacations they would bring his

(40:58):
family and friends on but then he started getting more annoyed when her work commitments took her
time and attention away or even when she would be recognized when they were out together now she
thinks that if she was paying attention maybe she would have seen the warning signs but again
hindsight and all of that there is a fine line between being affectionate and proud and being
possessive and jealous and that there is a really really really really really important point

(41:23):
he would pull her close when he sensed a guy looking at her but she saw it as him not being
afraid to show his feelings for her rather than a jealousy thing she even liked it when he wanted
to know who she was talking to or saying he didn't want her to hang out with certain guy friends
but then his insecurity took centre stage and again I will reiterate that if early days someone

(41:46):
that you're seeing is acting this jealous and they want to know who you're talking to and they
don't want you talking to certain guys just get out get out get out get out get out get out it
doesn't necessarily mean that they're going to be abusive but it's not something that you want to
ever have to deal with that is controlling as hell I know some girls say they like it when a guy

(42:09):
is jealous of them I personally do not agree with that at all I think it is a major red flag I think
that whatever guy you're seeing he should trust that yeah maybe she's talking to a guy who is
into her but I know my girl and I know that she's not going to do anything about it so that is
always just a bad bad bad bad trait for me so Audrina started rehearsals for Dancing with the

(42:39):
Stars in 2010 two months after her and Corey had rekindles the training was gruelling and she was
determined to do well and excited to she and Corey were spending less time together and she
wasn't returning his messages as quickly as usual soon he accused her of sleeping with her
dancing partner Tony a married father but he wouldn't let it go he would make rude comments
about him every day he accused her of making the dances too sexy and inappropriate he would be in

(43:02):
her face questioning and insinuating that Tony was getting handsy and their dancing had evolved
into something sexual he was constantly calling a text to keep tabs on her she was constantly
she was embarrassed Tony and others on the show were starting to notice she didn't want them getting
the wrong impression of her and Corey she even started questioning if she was actually wrong
maybe she was being too touchy he was getting in her head and she was beginning to question herself

(43:26):
he would act proud of her in front of the camera but blow up on her at home and there is our good
friend gaslighting when she was eliminated in week six Corey didn't apologize about his behavior
and she didn't push it they planned a trip to hawaii in australia to visit Corey's family
oh i'm sorry uh yeah sorry about that guys uh so they had a great time he was totally different

(43:52):
on vacation mode but even during their best times together she was holding her breath waiting for
something to set him off she kept justifying his behavior but he was slowly showing her who he really
was and she ignored it the next step in Audrina's career was filming for her new reality show Audrina
at first her parents were hesitant about being on the show but they agreed to do it for her and the

(44:13):
idea that people would get to see the real Audrina her youngest sister samanda hated reality to be
and didn't want any part of it but by the end of the season she had also appeared in a few episodes
her other sister Casey agreed to be part of it as she had already appeared on the hill several
times so knew what she was getting herself into her brother mark was low-key and he just agreed to
go along with it she also had producing credits on the show and thought that she would therefore

(44:38):
have a creative say in the storyline they filmed for three months which was very short compared
to the hills she thought it would be more relaxing and fun filming in their family home with the
people she loved but it ended up ripping their family apart she would tell them to be themselves
but it's hard to be herself when the cameras are on and the producers are prodding you to say certain
things one of the show runners was very manipulative and would purposefully create drama to juice up

(45:03):
the ratings she would often tell our mother one thing and her sister Casey another to pit them
against each other these two had already had a tense relationship her sister wanted her own
storyline featuring her husband and kids and it didn't sit well with her that the focus was on
their immediate family her mother was always very nervous filming so it ended up having even less
of a filter in a short fuse and therefore ended up being even harder on Casey it only continued

(45:28):
to get worse Audrina had always tried to be the peacemaker it was devastating and she hated to
see it happen she knew the show couldn't go on beyond the few months they'd already begun to film
the experience was so traumatizing for the family that Audrina vowed to never bring people that she
truly loved onto a show again Casey didn't talk to her mother for a year after they were done
filming and was furious with Audrina for a long time because she was convinced that she had production

(45:53):
edit the show to make her look bad it wasn't all about Casey and their mother one of the things
their family thought about was Audrina's relationship with Corey they had a lot of reservations about
him and the way he treated her he wasn't traveling for work at the time so was home for filming a lot
more for the first time they saw how he was treating her the demands he made a further the

(46:16):
unrealistic expectations on her time and energy and most of all the way it affected Audrina but
they also saw him share his feelings for her honestly and genuinely and be present and open
with their family they saw the bad but also saw that it wasn't all bad they were just as confused
about him as Audrina was Casey her sister knew more than the rest of them as Audrina had provided

(46:36):
her dark good secrets to her it was hard for her to see how kind and loving he could be to her in
front of the cameras or other people and no behind closed doors it was different whenever Corey came
to visit he expected her to drop everything in her life to be with him she was still trying to
hurt to build a career so she had to take meetings and beyond shoots and auditions and all his
insecurities would come back when she was out of the house for more than an hour or two she had a

(47:00):
huge moment when she was at a photo shoot for Mary Claire magazine but he was texting and calling her
the whole day his messages grew angrier and angrier and other people on the set started to notice
how his obsessive and controlling behaviour was affecting her she started to feel smothered by
his desire for control which started seeping into other parts of her life he once asked her to

(47:20):
delete her facebook to prevent her from connecting with people he didn't know or approve of and to
stop her from receiving messages he was clearly trying to cut her off from people and isolate her
so he was the only one she could turn to he clearly also didn't trust her looking back at it now
Audrina feels embarrassed to remember how she acted she was able to block out his behaviour from the

(47:41):
Corey she wanted to be with this is such an important statement you will literally do anything
you can to blame their behaviour on something else to block it out you just want to pick out the parts
of the person that are good and just kind of block out the bits that are bad and just like

(48:01):
brush it aside as like a one-time thing to this day Audrina is still trying to understand and
work through this in therapy and I completely understand that even years later I'm questioning
it myself and I understand I was in an abusive situation and all that but you still kind of think

(48:21):
to yourself sometimes that's something that I've struggled with the most I think is like even though
I know I wasn't putting up with it I was being abused I was being controlled I didn't really have a
choice in the matter you still kind of blame yourself and you do still think like how did I
put up with that and I find myself asking myself that question so many times and I think I'll always

(48:43):
ask myself that even though I understand it but I think it's just something that's always kind of
gonna be in my head Audrina started to get used to the ups and downs with him and the lows would not
seem so low the next time it became so normal that she would even worry when they weren't going
through some turbulence it became like a mind trick when she could no longer figure out what was
right and what was wrong or how to articulate her own emotions everything she did was to keep him

(49:07):
happy she also found out he was cheating on her they've been dating for almost a year we're both
asleep and she was woken up by his phone which kept ringing she went to turn it off and make sure
there wasn't some type of emergency she saw a bunch of messages coming in all at once and from a
girl she didn't know she knew if she didn't look she'd spend the next few days thinking about it
she saw multiple photos of a woman completely naked with her leg spread she thought first

(49:30):
that it could be a mistake maybe she meant to send it to somebody else but there were plenty of
messages from Cory to this woman things like baby come on send another one that's so hot she was
hot with anger but also not surprised she woke him up and showed him the messages he told her she
was crazy and what was she doing snooping through his phone he called her a jealous bitch she told

(49:52):
him to get out of her house but he refused she slept in the guest room she left early the next
morning for work and didn't answer his messages for a few days but he wouldn't leave her alone
he wouldn't give up on her finally just to get up to stop she answered him he started sobbing
telling her it would never happen again and that he was so sorry she said she needed some time alone
to think about it she told her family about it and it put a bad taste in their mouth as you would

(50:16):
expect and here again I think is a really important point is that you know when she's saying that he's
calling her over and over and over again and eventually she just answers him just to get him
to stop like this I can completely understand that and I've been there myself several times but

(50:37):
if you're at a point where this is happening answering that phone call answering that text message
it's only giving him the attention that he wants because when you're answering you might see it as
like oh just to get him to stop I'm just gonna answer but really that's showing him that oh I
have control over her so if I just keep harassing harassing harassing then it's eventually gonna

(51:01):
get the attention it's kind of like you know when you have like a toddler and they throw a tantrum
because they want something and eventually you give in just to give it to them that's kind of
teaching them that like oh every time they're thinking every time now I have a tantrum I'm
gonna get what I want and it's that same thing and that is also a form of abuse I'm not saying that
toddler is a form of abuse obviously and also when it comes to things like sleeping with somebody

(51:27):
if it's your partner boyfriend husband even just someone you've hooked up with before a friend
whatever it is if they're constantly pestering you pestering you pestering you to have sex and
you're saying no that you don't want to and eventually you give in just to shut them up like
that's also not okay and that's just something that I really want people to know and understand

(51:49):
just because it's someone you love your partner husband whatever whoever it may be that is never
never never never never okay a trip to the international polo club in Palm Beach for the
show came at the perfect time she went with her brother and her friend Joey she was after the
chance to try the game out and mek met Nick Rolden one of the players they immediately

(52:15):
hit it off but it's nothing inappropriate they were pictured by the paps as Nick gave their group
a polo lesson including the two of them riding in the saddle together Cory of course saw this and
was furious he called her over and over that day and she found out later that he also called
her mom dad and sister she felt sick to her stomach when she saw the amount of calls she knew it was

(52:35):
bad she immediately didn't want to make him angrier she knew the next morning she would have to face
the music her hands were trembling when she picked up the phone he immediately started screaming at
her who are you with where did you go how late did you stay out she was so tired of being interrogated
like a criminal she told him she didn't want to engage in this conversation and he said she
lacked compassion that he'd been up all night worrying because he hadn't heard from her it was

(52:59):
a classic manipulation tactic to turn everything around on her Adriana had always told herself
she would never let a guy control her but she could see in moments like this that not only was
she letting it happen but she wasn't even putting up much of a fight and again i would say you're
not letting it happen it is happening to you she didn't like how it felt but she was still torn

(53:21):
she loved him enough that she didn't feel her path forward was clear when she got back from
florida he was sitting in front of her house head and hands radiating despair it was sad and
pathetic but it also hit her with this deep ache she could help him heal him and love him when he
needed it and again that is all very typical of an abuse victim you think that you can be the one

(53:43):
to change them all you need to do is just love them and it just never it never works like that
she was able to gather enough strength to walk past him and not engage on that day but he persisted
parking in front of her house for days sleeping in his car refusing to leave unless she would talk
to him eventually she did and it was the same conversation as always where he would apologize

(54:07):
and say he wouldn't do it again but also if she could just be better for him he wouldn't need to
do these things somehow she held her ground after that kori had to travel for work which gave her
some space she kept in touch with nick and he came out to visit her she didn't want anything serious
but he invited her to argentina to meet his family so she realized she needed to stop sending him mix

(54:28):
excuse me mix messages and backed off her and kori's breakup was captured on the last episode of
adrina it was one of the strangest things she'd ever filmed he seemed surprised there were cameras
there he didn't want to have that conversation on tv she told the camera that everything she
had felt for him was dead but that just wasn't true she focused on work and spending time with

(54:49):
family and friends and enjoying her life but then kori's grandfather died and he reached out to her
in early 2012 for some support i'm gonna say again classic manipulation are you telling me that there's
nobody in the entire world that man could reach out to other than his ex-girlfriends totally manipulating
her to try and get back in again and as you will see it worked she was never close to his family

(55:14):
and sometimes wish she had reached out to them to tell them about his behavior once when they were
visiting australia to celebrate his birthday they were at a hotel when they got into an argument
he left the party to sulk in his room she was upset and felt the need to tell his family about
what their relationship was really like she told him that kori was sending naked pictures and
sexting other girls but they made it into a joke a boys would be boys thing and it made her uncomfortable

(55:37):
for making a big deal of it it wasn't okay with her when kori reached out for help she felt a lot
of pressure to be there for him her compassion outweighed her desire for a clean break she felt
for him so she let him come over to talk it's clear now how manipulative this was but when she
looked into his big brown eyes her heart broke to see him in pain after they spoke he left

(55:58):
for australia when he got back he reached out again and told her that his grandfather's death
had changed him it made him realize he didn't want to lose her and how important she was she
wasn't sure she was ready to get back together with him but she did start taking his calls again
for the next several months he was on his best behavior she's somewhere in her head knew that
he was using his grandfather's death as a way to get back with her but his term was so intoxicating

(56:21):
to her it was also a relief to not have the cameras around they started seeing each other more and
more he made her feel so seen and cherished he was generous with his attention and affection
but they were reluctant to give themselves a label she ignored the nagging feeling just like she
ignored the cheating and of course there was more cheating she later found out when he was traveling
he wasn't being loyal she started getting messages from girls online telling her their best friends

(56:46):
were making out with kory at various parties she did confront him but he would just say there were
stupid girls who were lying for a chance to interact with her he was once again turning it around on
her saying he was hurt she didn't believe him but the thing was she had never had to deal with fans
reaching out about cheating when she was with justin or ryan ever in her heart she felt these girls
were telling the truth they fell into a pattern of being apart and not speaking while he was traveling

(57:11):
and then he would call and tell her his feelings for her and they would be back together again when
he was in town he would be on his best behavior and make all kinds of promises sometimes he would
sit on her doorstep for several days until she was finally given or called so many times that she
would end up answering to make it stop somehow she couldn't be angry and learned to adapt rather than
to shut him out the pattern continued where he would be great and then something would happen

(57:35):
he'd accuse her of talking to other guys and when she would deny it he would yell and scream and
punch doors and again this aggression like punching doors and all of that stuff is a massive indicator
that this person has the potential for being physically abusive he would travel and she

(58:00):
wouldn't hear from him for days so she would know it was because he was cheating she would give him
the benefit of the doubt but then see naked pictures of girls or texts every time she confronted him
it would be her fault she didn't love him enough or she didn't answer his calls when she was out
to dinner or at an event his cheating would be because of whatever she did to trigger him
she didn't tell anyone when they started talking again which says everything and because she didn't

(58:24):
want the ups and downs anymore she did everything to make him happy she put him first always she
answered every phone call checked in with him stayed away from other men even talking to them at
work events thinking about it now makes her sick to her stomach but she thought it was the only
way they could move forward to be happy and the thing is it worked they became more serious and
were almost inseparable she stopped working so much in order to spend more time with him and

(58:47):
traveled with him to see his family and to support him during his competitions she turned down
amazing work opportunities when she would take a meeting or addition for acting roles he would only
want her to go to certain auditions because of handsome co-stars or if there was a romantic scene
the relationship was destroying her career she would turn down projects she knew would cause
conflict between them her team would be so upset with her for turning these jobs down so I don't

(59:11):
even think I need to point out to you here how these are all steps in completely isolating her
from not only people she loves but from people she works with potential job opportunities like
her career probably would have been very different only for this in 2014 her agent told her an NBC

(59:33):
travel show called first look was interested in her being their next host it would give her the
opportunity to get into hosting and be able to travel she jumped at the chance and for the next
two years she was home for four days a month and traveled the rest they were still in touch while
she was traveling and she found it comforting to have someone to check in with her as she traveled
alone Corrie was traveling for work for seven months of the year so he understood everything

(59:54):
she was going through but she still wouldn't say they were back together whenever they were both in
town they would jump at the chance to see each other but then he'd leave and she'd leave and
they would go back to their separate lives his controlling tendencies would still flare up and
he would ask if she was partying or hooking up at the producers when she had time off she would
catch up with friends and even met a few new guys she had known the actor chase Crawford for a few

(01:00:16):
years and ran into him at a friend's house where sparks flew they were inseparable while she was
there for the next few days she really liked him they made a promise to get together soon but when
she got home Corrie was sitting outside and he remained there for the next three days so this
whole thing of him just like showing up and like sitting outside her doorstep is so creepy like that's

(01:00:38):
stalking so creepy guys I apologize if there's a lot of pauses in between this um like I said
I've been really sick so I'm having to drink a lot of water these days and uh that's what the
policy says so I'm sorry about that in 2015 toward the end of filming the second and final season

(01:00:59):
they broke up again over the same old things but this time she really saw it as the end she was in
New York and filming a few episodes when she ran into Dustin she was happy and excited to see him
he had been living there and they decided to catch up for drinks while she was around he seemed
really centred and happy they ended up meeting a few times but again she went back to LA and
they went their separate ways once filming had finished Audrina was looking forward to time with

(01:01:23):
family and relaxing but pretty soon after she got back Corrie began contacting her again just when
she was feeling good I swear it's like they just know like they have this radar for when you're
feeling great and they just suddenly you hear from them again he wanted to pick up some things he
had left her house it was clear he also wanted to talk they were sitting in her kitchen when Casey

(01:01:44):
called to say that their aunt Darla had died she was only in her late 40s and in good health but
it had a blood clot in her lungs that died quite suddenly she was shocked and broke down sobbing
so hard she couldn't breathe Corrie immediately took over and guided her into his car to get her
to the hospital he was comforting and supportive to all of her family as they gathered to say goodbye
to Darla she was in a very bad place for the next few weeks and Corrie was there for her every step

(01:02:08):
of the way he wouldn't leave her side made her breakfast checked on her and asked her she was
feeling he had known Darla and won her passing also the experience really brought them together
seeing him with her mom and sisters crying outside the hospital changed the way she saw him
they got back together without even really discussing it it felt natural and good she
needed him more than ever in the next few months there were some of the best times they ever had

(01:02:33):
he was on his best behavior taking great care of her and making a real effort to connect with
her family he wasn't traveling and their feet felt on solid ground one evening they had plans
to go on a broke cruise to hear this band they both loved the night before she was feeling off
she'd been so exhausted lately and figured she was just run down but she also had an inkling
that something might be up and bought a pregnancy test she waited until the next day to take us

(01:02:57):
and it turned out her instincts had been right she was pregnant when she saw Corrie the test he
had the biggest smile on his face he gave her a big hug that made her feel so content he was so
excited she wanted to jump in but also couldn't shake the worry about the issues in their relationship
after a day of disbelief she felt ready to give motherhood everything it turned out she was already

(01:03:17):
eight weeks pregnant and their baby would be arriving in june she was shocked as she hadn't had any
symptoms everything from then on became about the baby she loved watching her belly grow and
feeling the little kicks when they found out it was a girl she was filled with joy her parents
were over the moon about the news Corrie was the best he'd ever been and they had seen how he was

(01:03:38):
how he was after darla's death so they had hoped to that he was a reformed man her dad had a heart
to heart with him which she later learned about to express how important it was that the issues of
the past stay in the past and that taking care of his family should now be his top priority he was
very respectful and from what she heard it was a productive conversation adrena's next thought was

(01:03:59):
that they had to get married that was how she had been raised she would do whatever it took to make
the relationship work for the sake of the baby when she told him her thoughts on marriage he said he
couldn't agree more he had actually bought a ring almost a year before in australia with his sister's
help and he had hung on to it even after they broke up he said that even in those dark moments he
thought they'd still end up together in november 2015 he proposed all of a sudden she was 29 and

(01:04:24):
about to be a mother and wife she still wasn't a hundred percent sure she could trust their
relationship so she wanted to take control in the area she could he was going to be traveling a lot
for work over the next few months and she knew she would rather be an orange county near her family
than alone in her house in LA so she put her house in the market and started looking at homes in the
oce the move kept her busy and shortly before the holidays she loaded her car up with presents for

(01:04:48):
her family and brought them to her grandmother's for their big christmas celebration she was carrying
the gifts up the hallway when she started gushing blood she was terrified and thought she lost the
baby in a panic she drove herself home and quarry took her to the ER to the ER where they learned
their baby was fine adrena had just overexerted and the doctor mandated two weeks of bedrest

(01:05:09):
being forced to sit still with all the emotions and worries running through her mind about the
engagement and pregnancy was immensely difficult it was a tough two weeks for her in december she
announced her pregnancy to the world she went to austria for three weeks to spend time with gory's
family they threw them an engagement dinner and it was a lovely celebration when they came back
quarry was gone for most of her pregnancy she was on her own to find a new house and prepare for

(01:05:33):
the baby she felt lonely and everything started crumbling again he often wouldn't call her for
days at a time then she found out he was at a casino all night with his single friends and random
girls gambling until sunrise and sleeping through the next day he wasn't even subtle about it as
she found out by checking his friend social media where everything was posted for everyone to see

(01:05:54):
being pregnant changed her perspective on everything being the only sober one in a group of
people partying lets you see everything clearly whenever he was briefly in town and they would go
out with friends she would want to leave early if she was tired or her feet hurt quarry wasn't
tuned into what she needed seeing him drunk and reckless and mean while she was sober it was
an eye opening she wouldn't say anything but she because she didn't want to cause a fight with a

(01:06:18):
drunk man this would make him even angrier and he would even become aggressive to his friends
he then wouldn't remember any of it the next day convenient i hate when people say they don't remember
anything the next day like come on now she prepared herself mentally to have to raise this baby alone
she was seeing that quarry couldn't be there when she needed him she ended up finding a beautiful house

(01:06:42):
when she told quarry he wasn't engaged and made no move to participate in the purchase so she bought
it herself with her grandpa as her mortgage cosigner she felt so proud of herself i love i love this
like to be pregnant and to i know she's in a different position like she's a celebrity she has

(01:07:11):
more money than the average person but for her to decide okay this man is not going to be there
for me so i'm gonna have to purchase this house myself because he's not engaging i'm doing all
the work like i just think that's amazing and i'm really proud of her for doing this because it

(01:07:36):
would have been so easy to just get him to cosign on the mortgage even though he wasn't that engaged
but i feel like this was kind of mommy adrina coming out i feel like you know she says herself
that she changed once she had this baby and like i really think this is kind of the start of it but
yeah that is amazing and i always say to women um and this is in any type of relationship and not

(01:08:00):
just like abused women i always say have your own bank account have your own expenses you know if your
name is on the mortgage find out there's a way that you can get out you're not losing money all of
this stuff like um don't just share your finances really nearly with your partner husband whoever
i just don't think it's a good idea and i learned that lesson the hard way

(01:08:24):
while she'd step back from hosting and appearances adrina continued working on her swimmer
line called pre swim she also threw herself into planning the wedding they decided to get married
in hawaii which was halfway between their two families it's clear now that she was looking
for distractions and wanted to stay busy she didn't want to sit still with her feelings
when the house was finally ready she was eager to get in and get settled she was 37 weeks pregnant

(01:08:48):
and ready to nest before it was time for the baby's arrival the weekend of their move cori
announced that he was going to vegas with a few of his friends the baby was due in a week or two
which meant really that she could come at any time as gently as possible she told him no she needed
him here he couldn't she couldn't unpack all by herself and could he please just stay to make sure

(01:09:08):
he would be there when the baby came he didn't think it was a big deal he said they'd get
to it next week and so off he went she didn't hear from him for a few days she found out he was up
on a parting heart and going to strip clubs and then he missed his flight home her family had to
help her with unpacking the house like can you even imagine you're two weeks away from giving birth

(01:09:31):
you could give birth technically any day now and your fiance just said oh yeah i'm just gonna go to
vegas there with the boys for a few days like really that's insane to me like that is just insane to me
her mother was in the front yard when she saw a truck pull up with cori in the passenger seat

(01:09:53):
as soon as he saw her they kept driving adrina was so livid she could hardly breathe when he finally
got home she told him she couldn't deal with this level of stress it wasn't good for her or for the
baby he left and stayed at a friend's house in the days leading up to her due date there was
concerned that the baby was getting so big her head wasn't turning down so they scheduled a
c-section for june 21st a week before her due date then they found out last minute that cori had to

(01:10:17):
be in san francisco doing a bmx photoshoot for a couple of days so they had to reschedule to june
24th which meant three more days of discomfort and nerves for adrina so not only to this man
just go on a little boys holiday to vegas she then schedules her c-section and he's like oh no
actually sorry i got to travel for work for a few days so can you just change the date there

(01:10:41):
like this is the birth of your child oh my god like i swear to god like men have it so bloody easy
like oh my god this infuriates me so her baby kira max was born on friday june 24th adrina knew

(01:11:01):
her life had changed forever cori was totally in love with kira he was supportive engaged and excited
he was a proud father and invited all his friends to visit he facetimed his family and australia
to show her off when they got home her grandma betty stayed with her to help and it was incredible
having her there her grandpa max had died a few months earlier and it felt like they needed each
other the second week she went to her house to her grandmother's house as cori was traveling again

(01:11:27):
she was upset about him leaving only a week after kira's birth but she understood the importance
of his career for the first time his absence didn't bother her as much this is such an important turn
something in her had started to change it took only a few months before cori caught on to the shift
he often said adrina didn't give him enough time or attention as a result even when he was home he

(01:11:50):
was often hanging and drinking with friends it was fine with adrina as she was used to doing it on
her own it was just her and kira i find it really interesting here when she says that you know cori
eventually caught on to this shift in her this change in her i remember that happening for me too
with my abuser i had um it was probably like a few months into when i got my first like proper

(01:12:16):
like real job i would say here um and you know i was working with people my age and people a bit
younger and i was starting to go out more and i was making more friends and i kind of suddenly
didn't really care so much about what was happening at home obviously was still a huge stress but i was
a little bit more carefree than i had been i was out of the house more and he definitely noticed

(01:12:39):
the shift and he would say to me oh you've changed and like you know saying that like i was being
different and i wasn't being myself and all of this stuff and he would say to like other people as
well his friends and my friends and it's just because it's that first time when they feel like
they're losing a little bit of control over you and obviously that is the complete opposite of

(01:13:03):
what they want adrena knew she wanted their wedding to be a boho beachy fairytale she realizes now
she was maybe fantasizing that the wedding would heal the rifts of her relationship they had a block
of rooms at the resort where their family and friends stayed it was the first time the families
would be meeting so they wanted to make it a week long event cori's friends rented a beach house a

(01:13:24):
little farther away and cori spent most of his time there her biggest concern was keeping the paparazzi
away she had even asked the venue staff and wedding planner to sign nda's she thought he had succeeded
she had succeeded until she saw pictures in the tabloids before she'd even seen her own
photographers pictures it was frustrating and violating but she was just glad she didn't know

(01:13:45):
what was happening at the time she later found out it was some of cori's friends that had sold
the address to a paparazzi who would then climbed up the side of the mountain to take his pictures
despite her best efforts the families didn't seem to bond at the rehearsal dinner both families sat
on opposite sides and there was a little conversation there also seemed to be conflict over kyra

(01:14:06):
who would obviously grown up close to adrena's family and was very comfortable and happy with
her parents and siblings she was a little more hesitant with cori's family they were all strangers
to her it was sweet to see how much they loved her but she didn't want to risk a breakdown and at one
point she whisked her way to her room for a quick reset after the rehearsal adrena's mother took
kyra back to the hotel and adrena joined cori and their friends at their house after a drink or two

(01:14:30):
she left to get kyra and head back to the hotel room cori stayed with his friends and kept the party
going kasey stayed with her and asked her how she was feeling she was feeling uneasy cori and his
friends seemed to be treating the wedding like an excuse to party rather than a celebration of love
and unity they had even reached a breaking point in the weeks before the wedding and had nearly
cancelled cori had acted very strangely when she was looking at houses in orange county while pregnant

(01:14:55):
and very sand-offish when she found the house she wanted it seemed like he had no interest in
buying the house together there was something different about their priorities and their history
together had made her ask for a prenup they went to spend oh sorry they went to speak to an attorney
about it and cori didn't want a sign he was furious saying it meant that she didn't trust him
and if there was no trust why were they getting married she said she couldn't marry him if she

(01:15:20):
didn't sign it he said he didn't give a fuck and to cancel that it wasn't his money it was very
hurtful and she broke down crying but because it was also kyra's future at stake and not just hers
she stood firm eventually he apologized and signed kasey could see adrena wasn't the happy bride
eager to marry the man of her dreams she saw how exhausted and sad and beaten down she was

(01:15:41):
she told her she didn't have to do this that she could pack her bags and her mom and dad would handle
the rest the offer was tempting but she couldn't do it to their guests she knew how much her parents
had paid and how much planning had gone into it she also felt how much her family had wanted it to
work and build a family with kyra she had to try and make it work before she walked away after she
did divorce him she found out how many of her friends and family wanted to stop her and tell her

(01:16:06):
it was a mistake but they also wanted to support her and so they went along with the wedding that's
like a really scary feeling like to be uneasy the night before your wedding and about wanting to
marry your fiancee and then to have like someone as close to you as your sister give you an opportunity

(01:16:26):
to call it off because they can see in you that you don't seem happy um i had a similar situation
actually happen to a family member which i found out about a few years ago um i was a child at the
time so i didn't know what was happening but i think about that sometimes and i would just like
want to reach out and like reach back into the past and just be like no like don't do it and it was

(01:16:51):
similar reasons where it was like no i can't let all these people down they've like bought a skiffs
and they've bought like their outfits to the wedding they've taken time off work and they're
just like that doesn't matter this is your life like put yourself first always put yourself first
the morning of the wedding she woke up feeling relaxed she felt she was on autopilot playing

(01:17:12):
the character of Audrina where the scene called for a happy smiling bride she thinks Corrie was
so happy to spend time with his family and friends that he didn't even know that she was off
hearing Kira's babbling in the front row of the wedding ceremony was the only thing that
kept her steady this was all for her later her sister sam told her it was like she had left
her body entirely that day she saw behind her smile that she was robotic she had no sparkle

(01:17:37):
or soul in her eyes they did have fun that day but it's heartbreaking for her now to look back on us
one morning a while after the wedding she had to go to the office she asked Corrie to watch Kira
but he said he wanted to go surfing with his friends which he did every single day she tried to
smile since his parents were still staying with them she told him she just needed an hour to

(01:17:59):
focus on work and she would come right back but he refused saying his plans were just as important
his mom eventually offered to watch her she was frustrated with him as always but also hoped his
mother had seen a glimpse of his behavior and could maybe talk to him after his family left they
were all out of distractions Corrie was either completely absent or too present hovering over

(01:18:21):
her and needing to control everything he would interrogate her and made seeing friends a miserable
experience so she started staying home more it seemed easier to make him happy than to go on a
girls night and make him angry she didn't want anyone to know how he treated her she was always
on guard and pretending everything was fine she also didn't know if anyone believe would believe
her everyone saw him as this charming good-looking happy guy she was afraid if they heard how much

(01:18:46):
she was struggling they think she was the problem and not him eventually even she wondered if she
was the problem she started to think what it would be like for Kira growing up and seeing and hearing
her father treat her mother like this what effect would that have on the way she saw herself when
she started to date as much as she wanted to see her daughter safe in her father's arms she found

(01:19:06):
herself trusting Corrie less and less with her she was so fragile still and she often brought
her with her wherever she went even to dinner with friends one thing that led to this was before
the wedding when her sisters planned a surprise battle in Vegas for her they had worked out with
Corrie in advance to take her away for the night while she was gone she saw videos on several of

(01:19:27):
Corrie's friends instagrams and snapchats that they were at their house being rowdy and drinking
playing music loudly his friend was running around the kitchen naked she called Corrie and could barely
hear him over the noise she asked where Kira was and why he had friends over getting wasted
he told her she was asleep upstairs but she worried he didn't have the monitor or that he
would be too out of it if she needed something and no one would be able to take care of her

(01:19:51):
he told her she was overreacting she was livid and couldn't sleep a wink when she got home she
noticed throw up stains in Kira's bassinet she had clearly thrown up and just lay in it
she yelled at Corrie for not watching her that she could have choked he didn't seem concerned
and that was one of the last moments she left him alone with her like imagine not even feeling

(01:20:12):
safe enough to leave your baby with their dad and imagine you're a father and you've got your
baby in the house and you're inviting your friends over you're partying your friends are running
around naked you've got music blaring and god only knows what else going on and then just leaving
your baby in her bassinet to just throw up all over herself like oh my god that's just I can't

(01:20:38):
even imagine I don't even understand how Audrina was able to stay away from the house that night
how she didn't like drive back walk back like anything like I just I really feel for her in
that moment Audrina never relied on him when it came to anything to do with Kira he would always

(01:20:58):
let her down anytime he was in a bad mood or he was coming home from a trip she would pack
Kira up and go to her parents house for a few days it was happening more and more but she still
didn't tell them what was going on even though they had to have expected suspected something
some nights Corrie would come home at three or four a.m drunk and furious and yelling and accusing
her of cheating there were good days when he was home and present and they would take long walks

(01:21:20):
together as a family he would cook while she fed Kira these days made her stay for every one of the
bad dates in the spring of 2017 she started to go to therapy she was starting to realize she had to
get out during a few productive talks she told Corrie she wasn't happy and he said the same he
said he wasn't getting enough attention or what he needed from her he agreed to go to couples therapy

(01:21:43):
they went a few times but the counselor gave them some strange advice he said that whenever she
walked out of the room when Corrie was angry and yelling that she was actually emotionally
abusing him but not allowing him to say his piece that she should stay and engage she couldn't believe
it I can't I can't believe that either Corrie pretended to be receptive in therapy but after

(01:22:05):
they left he would use what she had said to hurt her because now he knew all of her insecurities
after she'd opened up so much in therapy he would use things she said in later arguments
knowing it would hurt her the most and this is something I remember so well too like from
things that I would have opened up to my ex about in the really early days of our relationship when
everything was great and it's amazing like he stored all of these things these little things

(01:22:33):
in his head it could be the smallest thing or the biggest thing and like years later which is
suddenly burst out with it in an argument and used it in a way to turn it against me and it was just
the wildest thing and you're just sitting there like first of all you remember that you not only
remember that I told you that years ago but you're also now using it against me like it's the most

(01:22:56):
bizarre bizarre bizarre bizarre thing and this just to me goes to show that like this isn't just them
not being able to control themselves or you know going through bad patches in their lives or whatever
like this is deeply deeply deeply calculators like the fact that you're storing something in your

(01:23:18):
head that somebody tells you in order to use it against that person in the future like that's
terrifying to me. Corey was out of the house more and more she felt he was acting out to get her
attention there was never any resolution when they argued and then she stopped arguing she was
defeated she was numb and isolated and depressed she was losing weight because of the stress she

(01:23:41):
would feel like she was gagging and her body was rejecting even chewing she couldn't keep anything
down she felt lifeless she didn't say much to her parents at first because she was humiliated
but they knew something wasn't right due to the frequency of her visits she would sometimes stay
with them for a week or two she knew she couldn't keep it up much longer almost a year earlier
Corey was coming down from a big party weekend which meant following her around the house yelling

(01:24:04):
and accusing her of cheating on him with her trainer she went into Kira's room and locked the door
to try and distract herself but she couldn't hold it in and the fear and sadness burst through
she cried but tried to keep it quiet Kira reached over to pat her back her heart broke she was so
little but it was only a matter of time before Kira would begin to understand what was happening

(01:24:25):
her close friends started asking if she was okay they were noticing her weight loss and
sunken eyes from lack of sleep she didn't want to talk about it she was embarrassed to be in that
position Corey went to have a talk with her dad where he cried and said he wanted to make things
work but by that point he was who he was he could only try for a week or so before spiralling back
finally she opened up to her parents she was too ashamed to tell them exactly what he was saying

(01:24:49):
to her or how she was feeling she kept it simple and said she was unhappy and that he was mean and
would wake her up to yell at her when she let her mother read what he had texted her one time she
got very upset after the shock were off she was furious both of her parents told her to walk away
and insisted on helping out with Kira while she figured out her next step um so also what she says

(01:25:11):
here about like him saying that like he really wants to make it work and then you know they would go
through phases where he would be trying for a week to be okay and then he would go spiralling back
that really is the abuser it's another way of them to manipulate you so like when they're saying
that okay like it's me i'm wrong like i need to do better and i really want you and whatever

(01:25:36):
they're seeing that as you know something has gotten to that point where you yourself as a victim
have said okay i've had enough this really needs to stop now and they probably see oh no she's
slipping away she's starting to see through me and like whatever so this is their kind of effort to
pull you back in see no look i'm trying i'm doing my best i'm doing my hardest and then they suck

(01:25:58):
you back in and then suddenly they go back again to their old ways so it's just another form of
manipulation in july 2017 she was invited to miami's swim week to celebrate pre-swim she had left
kira with kori as it was just a short three-day trip and she was 13 months old now and ended up
being a huge turning point in their relationship she was getting frequent texts from him complaining

(01:26:21):
that she hadn't taken him and kira on the trip her team went out to dinner and posted a cheers
moment on instagram and kori immediately accused her of partying instead of working she called him
after dinner to check on kira and he didn't answer a few hours later he facetimed her from a friend's
barbecue it was dark outside and she could hear lots of people when she asked where kiri was he

(01:26:41):
said don't worry about it and hung up on her she kept calling and texting but he wouldn't answer
she was freaking out and stayed up most of the night she couldn't focus on the show the next day
he was sending her cruel and angry messages he told her she needed to get home now
accused her of cheating and even said he would kill himself she was really worried for kira and
kori wouldn't give her an update on her so she called her dad her dad immediately called kori

(01:27:06):
and he acted completely normal saying she was fine while he was on the phone he was texting adrena
with a very different tone she told her publicist what was going on and that she had to get home
she told her to smile and talk about pray swim for a few minutes and then after that they would
figure it out the next morning she finally got an update kira was coming down with a cold and he
sent her a video of her coughing badly he said she was pretty sick and he was worried and she

(01:27:30):
told him to go to the doctor as soon as she got home she took her to the doctor herself she needed
a nebulizer for the next few weeks after that she always took kira with her no exceptions
you imagine how terrifying that is to like call your partner who's taking care of your baby
they're at a barbecue it's dark outside it's loud and then he won't let you speak to your

(01:27:53):
daughter he won't tell you where she is if she's okay and then you end up the next day
getting a video of her coughing she's obviously really sick he's not taking her to the doctor
like that has to be so scary the last day of audreida's marriage started like any other
she was getting ready to head to work and he was taking a now 14 month old kira with her

(01:28:17):
she was in the bathroom getting her things together while holding kira kori had slept on
the couch after staying out all night partying she had gotten used to being woken up in the middle
of the night to him yelling abuse at her the night before had been one of those nights he had shaken
her awake yelling at her as her hair pounded i gotta tell you it is so startling to be first
of all to be woken unexpectedly out of your sleep but imagine like waking up and you know that moment

(01:28:42):
where you're still kind of confused of is it days at night what's going on am i dreaming am i awake
and someone is yelling and screaming abuse in your face like i can't even begin to tell you how
startling and terrifying that is audreina had found out about another incident of him cheating she
hadn't even really cared but had confronted him about it anyway so when he woke her up he was

(01:29:02):
demanding to be told who had told her he had cheated she was almost packed up for the day when
kori burst through the door of the bedroom she froze he was yelling as he came into the bathroom
again demanding to be told who had told her about the cheating he got closer and closer to her the
angry here angry or he grew he squared his shoulders and puffed out his chest his eyes
looking intense she stayed completely still and in a quiet voice she calmly asked him not to do this

(01:29:27):
in front of kira she said she didn't care about the cheating and wasn't mad so she suggested taking
kira to her parents so they could talk her sole focus was getting kira out of the room before she
could get to the door he slammed us blocking her exit she could feel her heart beating in her ears
she again said she didn't want kira to see this and to please let her drop her to her parents house

(01:29:48):
he grabbed the bag she'd been packing and shook everything out onto the floor
she took another step through the door and he took a step toward her then he put a hand on
both of her shoulders and pushed her back she stumbled backwards and lost her breath with the
shock she held kira tight so she wouldn't fall kira was screaming in terror and adrena shook as she

(01:30:09):
tried to calm her daughter kori shifted and stopped yelling maybe he realized he'd gone too far and
he started punching himself in the head which only made kira scream even louder adrena couldn't
sap the tears from streaming down her face kori finally crumpled exhausted and silent she saw her
opportunity and ran into kira's room locking the door she heard kori compounding down the stairs

(01:30:31):
she didn't know what to do she was still afraid of people finding out what was happening she was
ashamed and sad she also thought about the media finding out but she pushed it aside and focused
on their immediate safety she called her dad and told him what had happened he told her to hang up
and call the police she was shocked hearing those words from her dad who she trusted was god wrenching

(01:30:51):
did she really feel unsafe enough to call the police she wasn't sure where kori was and that
unnerved her so imagine like you are in this situation you first of all have no idea that
what you're suffering from is abuse and then someone you trust like your parent tells you
to call the cops while it's validating it's also extremely scary because you question yourself

(01:31:18):
and you're like wait call the cops like yeah i'm scared and like i've just been physically abused
but call the cops like that's pushing it too far isn't that for people who are being like
beaten up and like serious things like that like you never think that that's your situation so then
to hear it from somebody who you trust like that like or hearing it from a father is so disorienting

(01:31:40):
because you're just like wait are they exaggerating what's happening and you just can't like you can't
get your thoughts together because it's just so unbelievable that you're even finding yourself
in a position where you need to call the cops on your husband and your baby's father because you're
scared of them it's so crazy she quietly opened the door and kori was there in the hallway when he

(01:32:04):
saw her he ran back down the stairs grabbed a metal vase and held it to his head he screamed that he
was going to stand in the street and bash in his head so everyone could see it was adrena's fault
because she was going to leave him adrena couldn't believe what she was saying then he switched again
and said he was going to spend every moment until he died working to destroy her she begged him again

(01:32:25):
not to do this in front of their daughter but he was getting angrier and more out of control
he walked outside and she followed him he got in his truck looked at her and said just know that this
is all your fault and drove away did he mean he was going to hurt himself she felt sick she waited
for her family to come over she thought about how much worse the last two months have gotten the name

(01:32:47):
calling bitch cunt messy lazy woman a fuck-up who's used by everyone has no real friends she had slowly
started to believe it she had felt herself slipping away having no bruises or cuts made it easier to
deny what was happening she would try to blame his partying and not him she justified and rationalized
his behavior now things were much worse she immediately felt safe when her dad walked in

(01:33:12):
and hugged her she knew he would fix everything like he had when she was little she ended up
recovering from that morning and before long kory was back at home they had parallel but separate
lives that sometimes intersected a few weeks later she ended up calling the police again
then she knew then that there would be no turning back when the two cops showed up she told them

(01:33:33):
what happened it was terrifying to open up but she also felt a weight lift offer now i've tried to
find what this incident was she doesn't specify it in her book she doesn't talk about it anywhere
that i could find i tried to do google searches i was looking for anywhere that it was mentioned and
she doesn't mention it anywhere so i have no idea what got to that point where she called the cops

(01:34:00):
herself um but i can only imagine that it was pretty bad she stayed with her parents for the
next few weeks with kory showing up several times begging her to come home but this time she knew
there was no going back but as is often in these cases she was just it was just the beginning
a few weeks later she had to appear in a panel to promote her swimwear she was really looking

(01:34:22):
forward to it until kory turned up to the event and came backstage to confront her right she was
about to walk on she was both terrified and mortified suddenly after months of avoiding
taking care of her he wanted kira he yelled at her and asked her where his daughter was demanding
to see her and calling audrina names she felt out of her body during the panel knowing kory

(01:34:42):
was standing in the crowd watching her while texting her all kinds of things it moved her to
quickly file a restraining order and to file for divorce to complicate things even more kory had
still been living in her house while she was staying with her parents she could not get him
out of there and then his parents flew out and stayed with him also at the house she later found

(01:35:03):
out he went through all of her things including her jewellery and paperwork even journals she'd
been writing to help her cope with the abuse he ripped out all of the pages she was able to go back
a few times with the police escort to get things for kira and herself as violated as she felt she
was just glad not to be in that house with him anymore she ended up having to pay him off to
get him out she borrowed 35 000 dollars from her family to do so even with the restraining order

(01:35:29):
she was still afraid of what he might do her biggest fear was not being able to keep her
daughter safe he had taken her birth certificate from the house and she was terrified of from
getting a passport and taking her away to australia she was also sad thinking of kira having to deal
with the ramifications of their marriage for the rest of her life when she moved back in she found
a letter kori had written her he said he never thought their relationship would come to this

(01:35:53):
that he loved her and kira and remembered their fond moments in their house it was clear he was
trying to win her back it portrayed him as a heartbroken victim and her as the person who broke up
their family for a second the last-ditch effort of manipulation almost worked adrena put the house
in the market as she couldn't bear to stay there it's all quickly and she lived with her parents

(01:36:13):
for the next six months while looking for a new place she focused on trying to heal eventually
she moved to newport beach where she stayed for a year as part of their divorce kori had been
giving visitation with kira twice a week for a few hours the handoffs took place at the police
station because of the restraining order it was the hardest thing she ever had to do to give kira

(01:36:34):
over to him the first time her whole body would shake and she could hardly breathe she was glad
his parents were there to help him and kira was always happy when his mother was around but when
his parents weren't there kira would be with him and his girlfriend of the week she had friends
keeping her updated on his posts and social media with kira because he had her blocked she would get
pictures of kira sitting on some random girl's lap which never sat right with her once she filed

(01:37:00):
the paperwork everything went public she received a lot of support from fans which meant a lot to her
she tried to keep quiet and not give interviews paparazzi sat outside her parents house for weeks
making it hard for her to leave she would have to figure out ways to sneak out around this time
the hills was being rebooted which adrina was reluctant to be a part of as she felt she had

(01:37:22):
left that part of her life behind but after some thought she felt she wanted to share with the
viewers how different she was now and realized she had a lot to say she tried her best to be happy
and engaged with the cast but she was still raw and shaken from what was happening in her personal
life she had never imagined being a single divorced mother at 35 she looks back on the first episodes
now and finds it hard to even recognize herself as she was at the darkest and hardest point of her

(01:37:45):
life and i will second this like people would think that once you get out of the relationship it's
fine and great and you can move on and it's done and it's over and it is not like the hardest
points in your life are the months and even years after it takes so long to recover from something
like that because you're being in beginning to process that oh my god i was actually abused

(01:38:08):
and then you're trying to get used to that and then you're trying to understand why you stayed and
all of this and it's oh my god i would never want to ever go back to those years after i left it
was truly awful adrina got reacquainted with justin on the show she hadn't seen him for years but
he had reached out to see how she was after her divorce he was also worried about kira having

(01:38:28):
been a child of divorce himself ryan cabrera had also reached out to her and they started talking
again at the end of 2018 the cast went to santa barba for hidey and spencer's vow renewal when
adrina got an email that her divorce had been finalized she was relieved and also deeply sad
what adrina has been through has made her look at her life differently and really appreciate what she

(01:38:49):
has she feels like she will never again not trust her instincts she spent time trying to understand
kori and what caused his behavior but she realized she would never know and stop trying to rationalize
his unforgivable behavior she'd wanted to love him and be loved by him and for her daughter to have
everything she deserved that was why she stayed she advises to not ignore red flags that words

(01:39:12):
and actions are how people show you who you are the truth is she says a relationship isn't going to
solve your problems some more things she has learned are to listen to your instincts let go of fear
stop caring what other people think dream big hold your power stay focused and surround yourself

(01:39:32):
with the right people so that is it guys that is adrina patritch's story i hope that you enjoy
that i hope that you learned some things from it um once again reach out to me if you need any help

(01:39:53):
advice questions anything like that um my instagram is at mad gogs again links and bio and the hotline
dot org once again if you need any help and i also want to shout out i don't know who this person is
but the other week i had under so under each episode on spotify there's a little question box

(01:40:18):
and it's just like your thoughts in the episode whatever so i had someone a listener reach out
to me and said on several episodes they really enjoyed the podcast which i appreciated but they
also informed me that some of the audio was missing from several of the episodes so i went back and i
fixed the audio i don't know what the issue was it was only a certain episode so if you had that

(01:40:39):
trouble i'm really really sorry and if that person is listening you know who you are i appreciate you
so much and if you reach out to me on instagram um or i think you can probably get my email through my
my link as well in my bio if you can reach out to me at all i would love to send you a personal

(01:41:03):
thank you um maybe send you a little gift because i really appreciate that and i never would have
known otherwise um so thank you so much for that any feedback is always always always helpful to me
so um thanks once again guys i appreciate um all your support and for being so patient while i got

(01:41:24):
my life together and i'm gonna try and release so the really episodes are gonna be released from now
on every not every tuesday but it's gonna be tuesdays and i'm gonna aim for every two weeks
um so hopefully we'll get two episodes out a month i'm gonna really try and stick to the schedule now
the good thing about being ill and being at home is i have a bunch of episodes written up and ready

(01:41:47):
to go so all i have to do is start recording them so i'm hoping to get those out to you guys and
thank you so much for listening i love and appreciate you so so much goodbye and see you next time

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E24 - Audrina Patridge

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.css-14f5ked{margin:0;word-break:break-word;display:-webkit-box;-webkit-box-orient:vertical;box-orient:vertical;-webkit-line-clamp:2;overflow:hidden;}E24 - Audrina Patridge