May 1, 2025 • 48 mins
Ever attended a professional conference only to find yourself surrounded by people who seem to have forgotten all basic etiquette? You're not alone. In this candid episode, Warren and CeeCee dive deep into conference behaviors that drive HR pros to the brink of madness.
From the Virginia SHRM conference comes Warren's unfiltered observations about attendees who disrupt sessions with incessant talking, take photos of every slide (complete with audible shutter sounds), and block hallways with impromptu meetings. His rallying cry for conference attendees everywhere? "Shut the fuck up" – a sentiment that resonates with anyone who's had their learning experience ruined by inconsiderate behavior. The conversation reveals how technology use, spatial awareness, and self-restraint around free swag items have become defining elements of professional gatherings.
The episode takes a fascinating turn when CeeCee makes a surprising confession about letting her SHRM certification lapse during her pregnancy. Now facing the daunting prospect of retaking the certification exam, she weighs the professional benefits against the considerable effort required. Warren offers counterpoint perspectives from his own certification journey, prompting a deeper discussion about the real-world value of these professional credentials. Their comparison of different certification levels reveals intriguing insights about test formats and preparation approaches that will resonate with anyone contemplating HR certification.
Between stories about dental anxiety, AI-powered heckler detection, and the cultural significance of limited-edition company merchandise, this episode captures the authentic, unfiltered reality of HR life. Whether you're a seasoned conference attendee or preparing for your first professional gathering, you'll find yourself nodding in agreement at these all-too-relatable workplace observations.
Ready to elevate your next conference experience? Subscribe now, leave a review, and join Warren and CeeCee as they continue helping you survive HR one what-the-fuck moment at a time.
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Transcript
Episode Transcript
Available transcripts are automatically generated. Complete accuracy is not guaranteed.
Speaker 1 (00:02):
Had you actually read the email, you would know that
the podcast you are about tolisten to could contain explicit
language and offensive content.
These HR experts' views are notrepresentative of their past,
present or future employers.
If you have ever heard mymanager is unfair to me.
I need you to reset my HRportal password, or Can I write
(00:24):
up my employee for crying toomuch?
Welcome to our little safe zone.
Welcome to Jaded HR.
Speaker 2 (00:52):
Welcome to Jaded HR, the podcast by two HR
professionals who want to helpyou get through to workday by
saying everything you'rethinking, but say it out loud.
I'm Warren, I'm Cece, right, soyou're sounding so much better,
yay.
Speaker 3 (01:04):
I feel alive.
Look at me, I'm not nasally,I'm not hacking.
This is great.
Speaker 2 (01:14):
No, the last episode.
There was only one call if Icouldn't edit out in the last
episode, so, but everything elsewas just fine overall.
Speaker 3 (01:23):
You're welcome America, Feel my hacks.
Speaker 2 (01:29):
I promised last Thursday the Office Episode 2
thing.
I programmed it to launch onMay 24th, 2026.
I don't know, I spat, fingeredit and I'm like why and the
thing is it made me notice it.
It, and I'm like why and thething is it made me notice it.
(01:50):
Uh, april is going to be a veryhigh month for downloads of the
podcast and I was like, oh, andthen we're going to have and
because we're going to have anextra episode this month,
that'll just take us up.
We might have a record fordownloads for the month of april
.
But I look, why, why did ithappen?
We any downloads?
And I look and I can see itthere, and then I have to
actually click on it to see thatand it says zero downloads.
I'm like I don't know.
(02:10):
Yeah, 2026.
So you won't have to wait thatlong.
I've changed it.
It is going to be a week fromthis after this episode and it
will be airing.
It's gone, it is set up withthe correct date.
Y'all will get that.
And then, two weeks after that,we will have the office
benefits or not, yeah, benefitsepisode, which is awesome, and I
(02:33):
I think that's another episodethat highlights the struggles of
hr, because oh, benefit, hr iseasy and I can do benefits and I
could know you don't know whatyou're doing benefits and things
like that.
Speaker 3 (02:48):
As you all know, I've started a new role, so there's
a lot going into that.
Other than learning what you'reactually doing, there's also
getting your benefits set up andthen rolling over your what is
it?
The retirement plans.
And I had just signed thefamily up for benefits and my,
(03:09):
my husband, had some questionsand he's like, oh, for some
reason the dentist says thatthey're, we don't have that
coverage.
And I'm like, no, and I thoughtthat I I panicked because I
signed up for something wrong,yada, yada.
And the benefits guy is like,no, that doctor's just probably
out of network.
And I'm like, oh, oh, my gosh,I felt like an idiot.
(03:33):
I'm sure the benefitsdepartment is like why is this
person in our hr team?
Well, you know apparently Idon't understand benefits.
Speaker 2 (03:42):
Yeah, like I said, that's not your niche.
I would forgive you if thatwere my team.
Speaker 3 (03:51):
Yeah, yeah, I felt stupid.
Speaker 2 (03:55):
Yeah, and dental is one of those things.
I personally feel someone whodeals with benefits regularly
there's not much differencebetween any of the dental plans,
really between MetLife or DeltaDental or you just go down the
list of all the top dentalproviders, they're so
(04:17):
interchangeable.
But the difference is thenetworks, and I think dentists
move and change networks muchmore than doctors.
I've had that experience myselfwhere, oh, six months ago you
took my insurance and nobodytold me, and now I'm paying out
of pocket for this or I'm payingthe amount for out-of-network
(04:41):
service for this.
I'm like, okay, well, newdentist, next time you don't
need to schedule me anotherappointment in six months.
Speaker 3 (04:48):
And that's a crappy thing because I have well, I
don't think I have it anymore.
I used to have dental anxietyand it took a lot for me to
trust a dentist.
And now you find one, and it'sjust if they change and you're
no longer covered by them.
It's kind of heartbreaking whenyou get close to them.
I I did get over my anxiety,though now I am obsessed with my
(05:13):
12 years of a no cavity and Iam like let's go.
We're going on year 13, 13years no cavities, let's go.
Speaker 2 (05:23):
Yeah, I'm the same way as you when it comes to
dentists and I had.
I went to this one.
Well, backing it way up, donand I went to this dentist and
he retired and we were like,okay, he wasn't as convenient
because we'd moved andeverything, but we'll travel
(05:44):
because we knew him.
But he retired.
So we went to this mega chaindentist it's not mega chain, but
for this area they've got like10 offices and things like that
First dentist I had, she wasawesome, she was great, loved
her to death and theytransferred her to one of their
other locations that I was notgoing to travel that far for her
.
And so then I got this dentistand picture, you know, a
(06:10):
five-foot-tall Joe Rogan typeperson with definite Napoleon
complex, short dude thing.
So that's who they scheduled mewith and I didn't care and for
a long time I had a very badtooth and my previous dentist
had told me hey, this tooth isbad.
One day it will abscess.
(06:32):
Will it be to tomorrow, will itbe next year, will it be 10
years?
We don't know, but it'llabscess and you're going to be
in a situation so you need toget it taken care of.
But even my dentist said Iprefer you to have the natural
tooth in as long as there's noinfection and all this.
And so, as we did that and thedoctor at that practice I really
liked she said the same thing.
She said you know, I'd preferif you got it pulled sooner than
(06:53):
later, but it is better to haveyour natural tooth in there.
And this little Joe Rogan guy,he got like severe attitude with
me.
I really wanted to just punchhim in the face.
I I forget exactly what he said, but he pissed me off so I left
.
I, you know, I didn't even stay.
You know, after he was done thehygienic, I was gone before the
(07:15):
hygienist came back.
I was like, screw you, um, youknow the eric cartman, screw you
guys, I'm god and and I wasgone.
So I left, I didn't go back.
I went somewhere else and Ifound this dentist.
I really like Now, this guy, hewas a stoner, extraordinaire
dentist and he was like hereminded me of Tommy Chong so
much and he played in a band atnight and all this other stuff,
(07:39):
but he was just so cool.
Yeah, dude, I agree.
And he's like old, he's in his60s at this time, but he's, yeah
, dude, I really agree, I justhave this.
You know you're going to wantto get it taken care of, but
let's, you don't have to have itpulled immediately, but, like I
said, it he's as an abscess isall just, whether it's weeks,
months away.
(07:59):
Anyways, I had him forever andhe was really cool and I had the
most coveted slot.
On Monday nights he had a 6 pmslot and he always would say
dude, if you ever go missing,I'm going to know it's one of my
other patients, becauseeverybody wants the 6 pm slot
and you've got it.
You know he's just.
He was really a cool guy and hewas funny and he didn't care
(08:22):
about anything.
He was probably stoned whiledoing my teeth and stuff, but he
was funny and he didn't careabout anything.
He was probably stoned whiledoing my teeth and stuff, but he
was good dentist and I reallyliked him.
Well, he retired and the personthat took over his practice I
didn't know he retired.
I showed up and they didn'ttake my that's a didn't take my
insurance type thing and so Iwent to this other place and
I've been there, I've been happy, but Dawn loves it.
All three of the dentists arelike super hotties, she says,
(08:46):
and she's like I need to go getmy teeth cleaned again.
I think I have a bad tooth thatneeds looked at.
It's like they're yeah,everybody there is like Dawn.
Speaker 3 (08:57):
Why are you going to the dentist every other week?
Speaker 2 (08:59):
Yeah, exactly so.
Anyways, benefits World, it'sso much fun, it's so much fun,
it's so much fun.
I think the the benefitsepisode will be a lot of fun.
Good there, so yeah, oh, andalso I was talking about how
well the ratings were last month.
Y'all, I have y'all reallyliked our last episode with the
(09:21):
something about sherm.
Just touched a nerve yeah, like,and I went back episodes like
when we had baked hr on and thatit was.
It was supposed to be a shortysitting on sherm.
We were supposed to just like,do a 15, 20 minute episode.
That's all we planned for andit we I think we edited it down
to an hour over an hour,something like that.
(09:43):
But that one, when we hit anerve, when we talk about SHRM,
removing the E from the DEI orwhatever I forget the name of
that that episode did well.
So when we talk about SHRM,y'all respond.
So I'm going to have to come upwith more dirt or something on
SHRM or something along thoselines to keep y'all coming back
(10:04):
and things on SHRM or somethingalong those lines to keep you
all coming back and things.
Those episodes I was tellingCece when Kevin was on that
episode actually and it wasn't ajaded episode was the number
one download for that year, thehighest most downloads for that
year, and the SHRM episode, atleast in the first seven days,
is outperforming that one.
So I'm going to go gloat after.
Speaker 3 (10:25):
this podcast, at least in the first seven days,
is outperforming that one.
Speaker 2 (10:28):
I'm going to go gloat .
After this podcast, we have acompetition.
He's welcome to come back andtry and regain the throne, I
guess.
Speaker 3 (10:36):
It's on.
I have a SHRM confession tomake.
Uh-oh, I didn't know this, butI let my SHRM certification
lapse when I was pregnant.
I wasn't in an HR state of mindand I went on about a month ago
and I realized that mycertification has lapsed.
(10:58):
Now to recertify, you have todo the credits to say, hey, I'm
still learning, I'm still smart.
Well, since I didn't do that,the only way to get recertified
is to take the damn test.
So now there's the jaded partof me that's like fuck that, I'm
not doing that again, whatever.
(11:19):
And then there's the overachiever side of me that just
really wants a certification.
It's like the devil and theangel on my shoulder.
And now I'm devastated that Ilost the letters.
Speaker 2 (11:33):
What does your new job have to?
Is it something they encourage,they want they?
What is their opinion?
Speaker 3 (11:39):
I don't know, actually I have to do some
digging.
That's a good question.
Yeah, we'll see.
Speaker 2 (11:46):
Yeah, I will not take that test again.
I'm so ashamed I let it lapse.
Speaker 3 (11:49):
Do you see that behind me?
You see that that's a lie.
Speaker 2 (11:55):
So there's no other option other than you're so far
out that you can't take the exam.
You have to take the exam.
Speaker 3 (12:03):
Yeah, it's been a year.
Speaker 2 (12:06):
My assistant.
She got her SHRM CP back inFebruary.
I'm really proud of her fordoing that.
But we would do the SHRM study,the quiz questions and things
like that and I would say justfor fun hey, let's check out
what the SHRM SCP questions,quiz questions are and things
like that, what the Serm SCPquestions, quiz questions are
and things like that.
I thought the SCP questionswere easier than the CP
(12:30):
questions.
When we were doing that, I waslike I'm like I'm batting less
than 500 and you know, doing thequizzes together.
I studied with her and I hadfun doing that honestly and I
was learning too.
But when it came down to quiz,I was, I was, I was at less than
500 and getting them right andthe questions right.
(12:51):
And then we let's, let's trythe scp ones for this unit and
we were getting.
She was getting them right tooand it's not like it's something
because I have so muchexperience or anything like that
.
I was was like is the SCPeasier than the CP?
I don't know.
Speaker 3 (13:07):
So no, I didn't take the CP, I took the SHRM.
What is it?
I'm sorry, the HCR the.
Speaker 1 (13:15):
SPHR yeah.
Speaker 3 (13:18):
So I took the PHR, not the SPHR, and I remember I
failed that exam once.
I cried in the bathroom.
I took it again, I passed itand it was a lot of
regurgitation of terms, ofdefinitions, of like kind of
(13:39):
things that you know but youdon't know.
Know Like contextuallyually youdon't have everything memorized
verbatim or stuff like that.
But then when I took that SCP,it seemed that it was more more
rational thinking, more logicalthinking.
Here's a scenario how would youdeal in this scenario?
(14:00):
And it's like, well, that'sfucking easy.
Like not easy.
I shouldn't say it's easy, butit's easier, as someone who's
been working in the HR field, tobe like okay, my experience
tells me that you knowda-da-da-da.
And I felt that that's whatmade the SCP easier was that it
(14:30):
was more scenario-based as itwas.
Speaker 2 (14:31):
Tell me exactly what the the something, something act
of 1971 did and I don't,fucking, I don't know, like you
know, I can google, that youknow, if I ever need to know, I
will google that have you metchat gpt knows everything.
Yeah, I hear yeah, I well, my, Itook.
Well, I got the PHR in 2003.
And then, rather thanrecertifying, I got my SPHR in
2006.
(14:51):
And I kept that going.
And then, after the, I call itthe divorce between HRCI and
SHRM.
Yeah, because it got ugly therefor a little while.
But SHRM did the smartest thingin the world hey, watch this 10
minute powerpoint and we'llconvert your sphr to a sherm scp
.
So I'm like I'm on it, I did it.
(15:11):
Well, my, my employer at thattime didn't appreciate, or
didn't you know they weren'tsupporting and getting credits.
There weren't, as there thereare hardly any free credits, it
seemed like out there.
So I was on my own and so aftera while I let it lapse.
And then, when I got my currentjob, my boss told me out next,
next cycle, I want you to takeyour, get your certification
(15:34):
again.
I'm like, okay, so I did and Igot it the the sherm scp.
But yeah, it was, it was reallyinteresting.
And but to think that and Ithink I never thought of it then
, but until you said it, yeah, Ithink that in my mind the CP
was harder because it's justregurgitation of some.
What is the Mavis-Bacon Act orwhatever?
(15:57):
I can't even do it.
What is this and what is that?
Speaker 3 (16:01):
Mavis-Bacon taught me typing.
Speaker 2 (16:03):
That's it, that's the typing.
But see, you don't even know,but when you can apply what
knowledge you do have.
It seemed easier.
So maybe if you have even amild amount of experience, that
the SCP might be easier.
But who knows?
Speaker 3 (16:20):
I will say I was in, so my previous company.
They were very much into thecertifications, so this is a few
years ago.
They had paid not only for meto get my certification but they
had also paid for me to attendthese prep courses and this is
graduate level once a week,three hours a week.
They took it seriously and itwas very helpful.
(16:41):
And I'm laughing because I'm inthe class and we're reviewing
court cases that have happenedand there was one for quid pro
quo sexual harassment and it wasit happened in my hometown of
boca raton, florida, so it waslike it was the person's last
name, like flanderson versusboca raton, and I like excuse me
(17:03):
, this is hometown Florida pride, right here, of course, there's
a famous court case involvingsexual harassment.
That is Florida proud.
But it just made me laughbecause it was just such a
random place.
Speaker 2 (17:20):
Yeah, going back eons and eons in the 90s.
I remember specifically beingin college in an HR class and us
discussing that you could nothave same-sex sexual harassment
because that wasn't considered athing and you couldn't have
subordinate on supervisorharassment because the manager
(17:40):
should be the manager.
Imagine that and knock that oneout, deal with the problem.
And I just remember veryspecifically, I think the same
sex harassment something'stelling me it was an American
Airlines case, but back thenthat does evolve and change.
(18:01):
I mean we're talking 30 plusyears but HR does evolve and
change and nothing's changedmore than it has the last
hundred and some odd days in HR,it seems.
But I won't go too deep intothat.
Speaker 3 (18:17):
Oh, it's ever-changing landscapes apes.
Speaker 2 (18:30):
Well, my topic for today was I wanted to do a
continuation on my experience atthe virginia sherm conference,
because y'all seem to like ustalking and shitting on sherm
and and things like that.
Well, this time I'm going to betalking about the conference,
but I'm going to be talkingabout the attendees, and maybe
there's some of you out herethat I'm going to be talking
about and, yeah, some of youattendees are really got the.
(18:50):
It seems like people have lostall etiquette and decorum and
things like that.
So I want to think of this asabout being a good conference
attendee.
Speaker 3 (19:02):
I feel like this needs intro music and a theme
song.
Speaker 2 (19:09):
Be a good attendee, like an instructional video from
the 90s.
Well, and I actually wrote downnotes.
I've been doing more noteslately than I've been doing in a
long time, but my number onebullet is shut the fuck up.
So that's my number one bulletfor being a good attendee, and
(19:29):
I've got some bullets.
Speaker 3 (19:31):
Shut your mouth.
Speaker 2 (19:33):
Don't ask stupid questions.
If your question pertains onlyto you, don't ask it in front of
everybody.
Take it offline and if you havea question you know, keep it at
the 10 000 foot level bigpicture so everybody can learn
from.
Well, I have jane doe and shedoes this and I and get really
in the weeds with theirsituation.
(19:54):
I don't.
Nobody else wants to hear that.
Oh, here's another thing.
No, don't interrupt and makeasinine comments that add no
value to anybody else in theroom.
Going along the same line,there was this one lady in one
of the breakout sessions I wasin and she would just no
question involved.
Say, well, my company doesda-da-da-da-da, like she's
(20:17):
looking for some sort ofaffirmation.
Oh yes, good girl, pat you onthe head.
Your company is doing excellent, no question, it's just a
comment, my company does this.
Good for you.
Speaker 3 (20:33):
Nobody wants to hear that SHRM does not give gold
stars.
Everything at SHRM costs money.
They're not going to give you agold star for doing your job.
Speaker 2 (20:41):
But they give you the badge bling that says like I
got the HR dude badge bling andI did not get that.
I love HR.
And the lady, the lady, whenI'm up there getting the HR dude
and the Sherm SCP littleribbons that you put on your
your name tag and things likethat, she goes you want that.
I love HR.
I said oh no.
I said oh no.
Speaker 3 (21:03):
Can I just tell you I'm a sucker for that kind of
nonsense like the bling.
I went to SHRM and I went crazyover those stupid ribbons.
I was first time attendee, shrm, scp talent.
Well, I think I had like sevenribbons on there just like
(21:26):
layered.
Don't threaten me with a goodtime for Medals of Valor over
there.
I'm down.
Yeah, hr Valor.
Speaker 2 (21:37):
It was funny.
Those were funny ways.
Like I said, I didn't have anawful time.
It could have been better, butI didn't have an awful time.
But under STFU, bullet numberthree, nobody wants to hear your
uh-huhs, that's right, and allyour loud comments to yourself
throughout the I had someonebehind me was just doing that
the entire breakout session andI'm like okay, this is getting
(22:00):
too, too bad and not a showingof the rocky horror picture show
you do not have to interact dowe have a first?
anybody here, it's their firsttime do they even show the rocky
horror.
The place what used to showhere doesn't anymore.
Speaker 3 (22:14):
I do it's been a while since I've been to one
yeah, the gen, the gen zers arenot going to know.
Speaker 2 (22:23):
All that is the rocky horror picture show.
It's it's.
It's a suck-ass movie, but it'sthe experience, it's an
experience.
It's an experience.
It's not suck-ass, but it's nota great movie.
It's great in my heart.
And you can't watch it becauseif you watch it on TV, I know
I'm going down another rabbithole.
(22:44):
You just don't get the samething out of it as being there
in the theater and things likethat.
So anyways, agreed, bullet fourunder STFU, take your sidebars
outside.
Let me tell you I had it was abreakout session.
It was in the main rooms andthere was maybe 60 people in the
(23:04):
room and the room held hundredsof people and the people the
lady behind me is just liketalking and talking, talking to
person beside her and and Iactually had interest in the
topic and wanted to listen.
So I said I turned around andsaid excuse me, like two or
three times and then I just gotup and I moved like five seats
over to get away from directlybehind them and they kept going.
(23:27):
I couldn't hear the speaker andI just finally I said it in a
not loud, not soft voice sayexcuse me.
I moved because I couldn't hearbecause of you.
Can you please, can you pleasebe quiet so we could hear?
And but yeah, I that I foundthat just extremely rude.
And then my final stfu bulletwas if you ask, can you get a
(23:50):
copy of the slides, just get up,go, you know, play in traffic
somewhere.
I, that is one of my can we geta copy of the slides?
And they've even told you, hey,this most of the presenters
slides are going to be availablethrough the app, the, the
seminar app or whatever it was aconference app and things like
like that.
Can we get a copy of the slides?
(24:10):
That just kills me.
That was bullet point numberone.
Bullet point number two oh, Ihad a little bit of time.
It didn't take me that long,but I had a little time on my
hand.
I was motivated.
Technology is my next bullet.
Oh, yeah, a silence.
(24:36):
Your phone people.
You know you, you might be themost important person in your
entire company I'm sure you arebecause you're an hr pro and
things.
But you know, put it on quiet.
Everybody has a phone, a smartwatch.
I nowadays, I don't ever havethe volume on my phone on
because I'll get a buzz on mywatch and I look at it.
Okay, I'll accept, declinewhatever, get rid of it, but you
(24:58):
don't need a loud ringer.
And if it does for you, oh, goahead.
Speaker 3 (25:04):
I was gonna say it's funny that you say that, because
there was a time when I was ateenager where we used to pay
like $2 for a ringtone so thatwe could be like the person to
have Blink-182 playing in apolyphonic melody.
And now I don't remember.
I don't even know what ringtoneI have on.
It's never been on.
I have never had my phone on.
(25:27):
It's always been vibrating onmy watch, or just vibration.
I don't want to hear it.
I don't want to hear it in mypersonal life.
I certainly don't want to hearyours.
Speaker 2 (25:36):
And the only time I will say that I turn the ringer
on on my phone is like when mywife is traveling or flying or
something.
I want to make sure that Idon't miss any phone calls or
anything like that.
I will turn it on then, but itusually goes right back off
anyways.
But if your phone does ring,for Christ's sake don't answer
(25:57):
it.
Or if you do answer it, sayhold on and get out of the room
and don't have your conversationin the room.
I just common sense people.
Bullet point three undertechnology.
And I will admit this isprobably a shortcoming of mine,
just because I'm an oldcurmudgeon-y guy and maybe
because when I went to collegepeople didn't take computers.
(26:19):
Nobody had a laptop in theearly 90s that I knew, at least
In my fraternity.
I was the only person with adesktop computer in my
fraternity.
So yeah, there weren't a lot ofcomputers.
You went to the computer lab.
But anyways, the clicking onthe 7 am breakout, the 7.30 am
(26:45):
breakout session, and I liveover an hour and a half away and
I'm not a morning person.
I got up there, I got in, I gotthere on time, ready to go, and
this person is.
It sounded like she had afreaking typewriter.
I was just waiting for thatding and then the return noise
as it returns.
It was so loud and it was Idon't know I.
I was like do you?
I wanted to turn around just tosee did she have a typewriter?
(27:08):
I've never heard a keyboardthat loud on a computer in my
life.
Speaker 3 (27:13):
It was so yeah that that I was that person, I'm that
person I don't think you couldhave a keyboard that loud I have
nails and my nailsclickety-clack on a keyboard and
that is I.
I was in a conference once andsomeone I think they I don't
(27:34):
know if there's a sensoryreaction to pen clicking, like
people.
I know that drives people crazy.
This person thought I wasclicking my pen.
No, I was clickety clacking onmy keyboard.
And the guy like interruptedthe whole session and was just
like can someone stop clickingtheir pen?
(27:54):
And I was like, and this islike 70 people in a room?
And I was just I think that wasme.
So anyway, I'm so paranoid oftyping in public now no, I can't
imagine that being justfingernails.
Speaker 2 (28:07):
That was like it felt .
It sounded like mechanicalpushed down hard key strokes
that you would have to do withthat.
It was really, really bad.
My fourth bullet undertechnology, taking pictures of
every goddamn slide.
Oh yeah, this makes it allbetter.
(28:30):
First, the session that thelady that was sitting directly
in front of me was doing thisone a.
It was on ai and hr.
So I'm like, you're not evenready for windows 3.1, much less
ai and hr.
But she had.
I've never seen an ipad it wasan ipad brand this big.
I mean my computer, my laptopmonitor is 15 inches, I think it
(28:54):
was bigger than that and shestood up and took a picture of
each slide.
Not only that, but each time ananimation came and a new thing
came on new line, she'd stand upagain and then triple down on
that.
She had the little shuttersound on her ginormous iPad.
(29:15):
So every time she hit thebutton to take a picture or
whatever the sound is that, itdoes it, and I was just I was
losing it.
But, like I said, the monitoron my laptop in front of me is
15 inches.
It was an iPad and it wasbigger than that.
(29:35):
I've never seen anything thatbig.
It was crazy.
Speaker 3 (29:40):
But the shutter sound on and all this, I'm like yeah
it was bad and also the slideswill be given to you.
Speaker 1 (29:50):
Yes.
Speaker 3 (29:51):
You don't have to take a picture of the slides.
Speaker 2 (29:53):
Yeah, and standing up to do it too.
Not only did she stand up, sheheld her ginormous iPad up above
her head as she's doing it, andI think my grandmother, who's
still alive at 106 years old,could do better than she could
at dealing with this stuff.
Aw.
Speaker 3 (30:10):
Grandma.
Speaker 2 (30:14):
Anybody is years old could do better than she could
at dealing with this grandma.
Anybody is.
Bullet number three bespatially aware.
This is a something that's lefthuman beings for eons.
You know we've lost the abilityto be spatially aware.
Whether you're in the grocerystore or at a conference, like
there's to the main room wherethe big speakers were was a
(30:36):
corridor and of course one wallof the corridor has sponsors and
tables and things like that.
So your corridor space is cutin a third right then.
And then you just have peoplejust all of a sudden decide
they're going to stop in themiddle of this busy corridor and
have their little conversationand block the progress for
everybody else when, hey, I'vegot to be in the other building
(30:57):
in five minutes for my session Iwant to do.
Just get against the wall, takeit out of the corridor area, do
something, but don't have yourketchup in the middle of the
corridor.
Be spatially aware in themiddle of the quarter, be
spatially aware.
I'm like, ah, and then my finalbullet is have some fucking
self-respect.
I absolutely.
(31:19):
You're so salty.
I have some fuckingself-respect.
These people don't.
How many of those stupidshopping bag totes with whatever
stupid vendor that you're nevergoing to use or hear from again
.
Do you need?
These people are lining up andthe same thing pisses me off at
(31:39):
Costco or Sam's Club or anythinglike that People lining up for
your little two-ounce sample offlavored water or a granola bar,
that you're getting like onethirty-second of a granola bar
and you're lining up for thatcrap and that.
But they're lining up to getthis, this shopping bags and
things like that.
I walked around the exhibitorhalls and things like.
(32:01):
I just looked around.
I didn't.
The only piece of swag Iactually got was UKG was one of
the premier sponsors, was likeputting it in your hand as you
walked by and it was in mygoodwill pile.
I had never even made it insidethe house, it was in the
goodwill pile in the garage bythe time I got home.
But but they some of thesepeople I kid you not were going
(32:25):
like losing their shit overthese shopping bags and had one
of those shopping bags with likesix other shopping bags more
than six shopping bags inside,had one of those shopping bags
with like six other shoppingbags, more than six shopping
bags inside of it.
That's what they were, the swagitems they wanted to pick up.
And you know the only thingthat I don't have any dogs
anymore.
Mine are all across the littlerainbow bridge but there was
(32:46):
some, like had a little tennisball.
I was like, oh, if my dog wasstill around I'd get that, I'd
go by and pick that up andthings like that.
But people, you're hoarding,this is hoarding.
You're the people I do not wantbringing something in for
potluck lunch because you've gotthe cat hair and you've got the
other stuff.
You're the reason I will noteat at a potluck.
Speaker 3 (33:09):
I do a potluck, I will say popular opinion.
I very much dislike swag.
I am not a swag person For alot of the reasons that you just
said, because I A I'm too lazyto bring it home Like there's
nothing.
There's assuming that I go tothese things and I'm traveling
and I'm on a plane and, like youknow, there's the logistics of
(33:33):
all this crap.
I won't bring it home.
The only way I'll lose my crapover something, if it's
something like that is of anykind of useful value to me oh,
give me like an upgraded powerbank, or I'll do that.
Or maybe, if you have a StanleyCup that you have branded with
your logo, I'll do that.
Or maybe, if you have a Stanleycup that you have branded with
your logo, I'll do that.
(33:54):
But I'm not gonna stand in linefor a pop socket of a brand
that I don't use.
That's just for me.
I don't, I don't care.
And I remember I went to a Shermevent once and I met up with
you know, you meet someone thereand you start to kind of chat
and walk around with them andshe was a swag person, she was a
(34:16):
swag girly and I don't.
I don't need this crappy 89cent water branded water bottle.
I don't need it.
So anyway, I don't.
I'm not a swag person, again,unless it's something cool.
How about a nice for my company, right, put a nice company logo
(34:37):
and hoodie.
I'm all about that Because,again, some days you're lazy and
you work from home and you justwant to throw on a hoodie and
it's company branded and you'rein dress code and it's so easy
and wonderful.
I'll do that all day.
Coffee mug, sure, but no, Idon't want it.
For a company that I don't evenuse, unless I work there.
(34:58):
I don't want it.
Speaker 2 (34:59):
When we moved now I don't drink coffee, my wife does
, and when we moved we've gotrid of literally hundreds of
coffee mugs.
Things we picked up over theyears former employers well,
former employers of mine, she'sbeen things we picked up over
the years, former employers,former employers of mine as
she's only she's been the sameplace 17 plus years but former
employers of mine and justthings you pick up and you get
(35:20):
somewhere where you're like no,no, no, no, and like you're one
person and she saved like sixcoffee cups and mugs and that's
it, and now she's basically onlyusing her Stanley-style cups
for her coffees now.
So those four, six, whatever wesaved, are just gathering dust
somewhere in a cabinet somewhere.
Speaker 3 (35:41):
Yeah, I can't tell you how many mugs and cups that
we've purged over the years.
Speaker 2 (35:48):
It's like no, and Goodwill doesn't even want that
shit anymore yeah, I don't needan adp mug.
Speaker 3 (35:56):
I don't even use adp as an hris.
Why would I want this?
Speaker 2 (36:01):
yeah, exactly, and I, yeah, just.
But I will say, on the swag end, when I did college recruiting,
we I think our swag budget wasa little bit higher.
We got some cool toys and neatthings.
Let's see, when did I quitdoing?
Stop doing that.
I think I did that in 2005 iswhen I stopped.
(36:21):
So it's been a long time sinceI've been recruiting, but at the
end of the conference none ofthe recruiters wanted to pack up
their shit.
They're like giving it to otherrecruiters and stuff like that,
because the recruiters havebetter stuff.
At least in the 90s or 2005when I quit doing that, you had
(36:44):
cool stuff and I would get somethings to take home to my kids
and things like that.
But after we were closing, hey,before you pack away, can I get
one of those for my kid?
Yeah, yeah, have it.
Can I get a Frisbee?
Yeah, you know we would swagtrade on doing that, but none of
the recruiters wanted to packtheir crap up.
Speaker 3 (37:02):
So, yeah, Although I will say I have a natural love
and a gift for actually creatinggood swag.
Nothing gets people more crazythan having like a limited
edition of something.
Speaker 2 (37:15):
Okay.
Speaker 3 (37:16):
And the same goes for company swag.
And I would say, if you do haveinvite only programs or
anything like that, likeleadership programs or something
like that, invest in somereally good programs or
something like that.
Invest in some really good Idon't know, like whatever.
Whatever water bottle or shitis popular at the moment and you
(37:37):
get that branded with the yearand only x number were made and
it's only for participants.
People lose their mind for thatstuff.
Speaker 2 (37:46):
They want it well, the only other job my wife has
had as an adult well, actuallyshe started before she was an
adult was at, I guess you mighteven say, people's former
favorite French company, target.
She was there for a very longtime.
I think their reputation hassort of taken a nosedive
recently.
Speaker 3 (38:07):
Some stupid decisions .
Speaker 2 (38:09):
So she was.
They did these, these things,for they called them hypo
classes.
So you got identified as a highpotential person and a swag
they got was really she's still.
She's been at her currentcompany 17 years and she did the
hypo because she ended upmoving into management there
somewhere along her her career,but she's.
(38:29):
We still have this attache bagtarget and it's like hypo I
don't even know the year that'swritten on it or anything like
that hypo team or a class ofwhatever, and it was a nice
high-end attache bag thing andlike, yeah, we'll put our to
this day for traveling and weneed to take our computers with
(38:52):
us.
That's, that's what she usesand and.
But where I was going to go withthis is people who were not
high potentials got pissed whenthey see, you know, here here's
dawn, in her little attache orher hoodie or whatever that says
you know, hypo class of 2010.
I don't have it would have beenlonger than that, but no, maybe
(39:14):
I don't know.
Yeah, too long or not.
She's been gone since then, butyou know, whatever, the hypo
class of whatever is they.
Those people got to go tominnesota.
They got to do this extratrainings and development and,
and and the people who were notselected?
Were they probably?
I bet most of them left prettyquickly.
She was telling me about allthese people sneering at her.
(39:36):
I'm like, do your fucking joband you can be.
It's not that hard to be a hypo.
Speaker 3 (39:41):
Yeah, so one of the things that I don't know if
you're familiar with theLevenger brand, but they make
like disc notebooks.
Okay, I'm not familiar with likethis notebook either so they're
leather leather front, leatherback, and then the only thing
that binds them are these really?
They're literally discs andthey're like loose discs.
But once it's specially paper,specially punched, so once it's
(40:04):
all together it looks reallycool.
But anyway, I got I call Ilovingly call them Flevenger
because it's like the OfficeDepot version, but it's like the
same kind of disk system.
Anyway, I special ordered thosethrough the website and if you
special order them through thewebsite you can get them
embossed.
So they basically take anembossing thing and emboss the
leather.
So I got the acronym of theprogram, which was MDP.
(40:28):
I got that embossed and all 20participants got one of those
like fancy leather notebookswith the MDP embossed in it.
People lost their damn minds andthis is one of the similar
programs where people wouldtravel in all over from the
country and yada, yada, and yeah, people lost their minds.
(40:48):
I got calls, I got everything,like can I get one of those?
And I'm like, no, you have tobe part of the program to get
one of these binders.
Sorry, you can't sit with us.
Try again next year.
I don't know what to tell you.
Speaker 2 (41:03):
Not a cool kid.
Also, a company I work with gotthese really nice faux leather
but what do you call them?
Portfolios that you know youcan hold a pen, a calculator,
business cards, a notepad andthings like that.
They were faux leather but theywere embossed with the company
(41:25):
logo and all the new hires gotone on their first day and they
had it before I started and butwe got to the point where people
would keep coming in.
Well, first, one time my the hrsupply room got raided and like
dozens of them ended up missing, which you know, along with
some of the nicer polos thatwere really supposed to be for
(41:48):
managers.
Speaker 3 (41:49):
but I, I'm like this is why we can't have nice things
yeah.
Speaker 2 (41:52):
And that's what ultimately happened.
They wanted to do budget cutsand those damn portfolios.
I fought for them becauseeverybody loved them, and it was
, you know.
Oh, and the next person wehired oh, you started and you
didn't get one of these reallycool portfolios.
I mean, I have mine somewherestill.
It was a really good, niceproduct, and it was, you know.
(42:14):
I even tried.
I told him I wanted to keep itand I said I'll go for a lesser
brand, a cheaper product.
You know, I think this was a isit K-Swiss or something Swiss
brand or something.
It was really nice but like,yeah, we could, I could go to a
lesser brand and I can save afew dollars per one.
And no, they didn't want to dothat.
So, okay, those went away and Iwas like I would just hate to
(42:36):
be that next person.
You know, our this, thisrecruiting class got our last
one and then the next recruitingclass sorry, you get.
You get a t-shirt and a littleplastic cup and whatever else.
Speaker 3 (42:49):
And a ballpoint pen.
Speaker 2 (42:52):
Yeah, exactly so.
Swag is good, you can have somegood things with it, but the
stuff they're giving away at theSherpa conferences, there's
nothing.
Like I said, one of thecompanies had a tennis ball If I
still had a dog I would havegrabbed it but no dog, no ball.
So yeah, y'all are hoarders,but no dog, no ball.
(43:13):
So yeah, y'all are hoarders.
So that's really all that I hadfor today.
You have anything else?
Speaker 3 (43:22):
I got nothing.
I came a little unprepared totoday's meeting, so I apologize.
I provided some great insight,though oh, I will say you know,
you reminded me.
Yeah, I gave myself credit.
I provided great insight as shepassed herself on the back.
You did.
So I will say just your wholetopic of being a good conference
(43:43):
attendee.
A few weeks ago, three of ourfriends went out to a comedy
club, and one of which she's alovely person, she's just also a
messy person and I guess shehad a few drinks before she went
to the comedy club pre-game andwhile she was which is, yeah,
just a classic pre-game which II cannot pre-game anymore, that
(44:04):
is that, that's just it would.
It would be bad, but I wouldactually.
So, anyway, she pre-games, shegoes to the comedy club, they
have an opener to warm everyoneup and she started heckling the
person and then she wasdrunkenly heckling them and just
kind of being rude.
(44:24):
Our other two friends were justso embarrassed they're like
we're not with her and finallyshe was just like this sucks,
I'm out of here and she stumblesout.
She got an uber, she's fine,she's messy, but she's
responsible.
And anyway, the punchline of thestory is that, as they were
leaving my one of the friendsthat remained.
She has one of those wearableslike the ai wearables, okay, and
(44:48):
she lets it play all day, shelets it record all day.
So she lets it record all day,so it just gives her end of day
notes and it picked up the wholeinteraction of the friend
heckling the comedian and beingvery rude by the way rude and it
just gave my friend articles ofhow to be a good audience
attendance and I thought thatwas fucking hilarious.
(45:11):
She was like, yeah, the aithing, just heard the whole
conversation hold the, heard thewhole interacting at
interaction and then sent herarticles on how to behave proper
etiquette at a live show and Iwas like this is how, this is
how ai will save the future oh,I'm, I'm all in.
Speaker 2 (45:30):
if that's the case, all in.
I love that.
I was hoping for a story,because I don't go to.
I've been to a comedy clubs, Idon't know a few times, not that
many, but it seems like everytime I go there's a heckler, the
drunk guy.
Speaker 3 (45:45):
So stupid.
Speaker 2 (45:46):
And I love when the comedian just stops and they've
prepared for this.
You know they're ready.
You can't say anything to them.
They haven't heard before.
You know, like going back towhen I was umpiring, you know
the saying is you never arguewith umpires.
It's like mud wrestling with apig.
It's fun until you realize thepig enjoys it and the heckler is
(46:06):
ready for anything.
You may think you're thecoolest, smartest, wittiest
person.
They've heard it before andthey've got a comeback ready for
you.
And I went to this one guy.
I actually ended up feeling alittle bit bad for the heckler.
I couldn't remember what hesaid, but the comedian just
decided, oh, it's on, and justdestroyed the guy and then the
(46:29):
guy got taken out.
He didn't say anything moreafter the heckler started.
But after the heckler was it?
The guys in the yellow shirtshad him leaving Bye-bye.
It's like I said before, I lovewatching that Torrance of
Yellowstone.
I'm always rooting for thebuffalo or the moose or whatever
animal it is.
(46:50):
I'm like, yeah, just yeah gorethem, stomp them, it's a natural
selection yep, exactly so.
Speaking of selection, you canselect to become a patreon
supporter.
You just follow the links tothe show.
It sounds a great saying show.
Follow the links to the shownotes and support us on Patreon,
like Hallie, the original JadedHR rock star, bill or Mike.
(47:13):
So thank you for your support.
I haven't checked reviewslately.
I meant to do that before theshow, so next show I will see if
there's any reviews, but pleaseleave us a review.
We will read it good, bad anddifferent on there.
And if you're not using ApplePodcasts, send it to us so we
know about the review, becausethere's so many other good pods
and pod friends and all theseother places that I just can't
(47:36):
check them all.
There's a review out there, solet us know and we'll read those
on there.
But give us a review.
It helps us grow and I promise,promise, promise.
A week from today you will haveOffice Rewatch Episode 2,
diversity Day.
It will be there, I promise,not in 2026.
Speaker 3 (47:54):
I know it's like Lucy with the football it might be
there, it might not, who knows?
Speaker 2 (47:59):
It's your fault, charlie Brown, for falling for
it every single time.
You block it Every time.
All righty With all that.
Let's see here the intro is thevoice artist is andrew colpa,
who does the intro, and then themusic is underscore orchestra
devil, the devil, and now, asalways, I'm warren I'm cc and
(48:19):
we're here helping you survive.
Hr one.
What the fuck moment at a timeyeah, thank you.
Had you actually read the email, you would know that
the podcast you are about tolisten to could contain explicit
language and offensive content.
These HR experts' views are notrepresentative of their past,
present or future employers.
If you have ever heard mymanager is unfair to me.
I need you to reset my HRportal password, or Can I write
(00:24):
up my employee for crying toomuch?
Welcome to our little safe zone.
Welcome to Jaded HR.
Speaker 2 (00:52):
Welcome to Jaded HR, the podcast by two HR
professionals who want to helpyou get through to workday by
saying everything you'rethinking, but say it out loud.
I'm Warren, I'm Cece, right, soyou're sounding so much better,
yay.
Speaker 3 (01:04):
I feel alive.
Look at me, I'm not nasally,I'm not hacking.
This is great.
Speaker 2 (01:14):
No, the last episode.
There was only one call if Icouldn't edit out in the last
episode, so, but everything elsewas just fine overall.
Speaker 3 (01:23):
You're welcome America, Feel my hacks.
Speaker 2 (01:29):
I promised last Thursday the Office Episode 2
thing.
I programmed it to launch onMay 24th, 2026.
I don't know, I spat, fingeredit and I'm like why and the
thing is it made me notice it.
It, and I'm like why and thething is it made me notice it.
(01:50):
Uh, april is going to be a veryhigh month for downloads of the
podcast and I was like, oh, andthen we're going to have and
because we're going to have anextra episode this month,
that'll just take us up.
We might have a record fordownloads for the month of april
.
But I look, why, why did ithappen?
We any downloads?
And I look and I can see itthere, and then I have to
actually click on it to see thatand it says zero downloads.
I'm like I don't know.
(02:10):
Yeah, 2026.
So you won't have to wait thatlong.
I've changed it.
It is going to be a week fromthis after this episode and it
will be airing.
It's gone, it is set up withthe correct date.
Y'all will get that.
And then, two weeks after that,we will have the office
benefits or not, yeah, benefitsepisode, which is awesome, and I
(02:33):
I think that's another episodethat highlights the struggles of
hr, because oh, benefit, hr iseasy and I can do benefits and I
could know you don't know whatyou're doing benefits and things
like that.
Speaker 3 (02:48):
As you all know, I've started a new role, so there's
a lot going into that.
Other than learning what you'reactually doing, there's also
getting your benefits set up andthen rolling over your what is
it?
The retirement plans.
And I had just signed thefamily up for benefits and my,
(03:09):
my husband, had some questionsand he's like, oh, for some
reason the dentist says thatthey're, we don't have that
coverage.
And I'm like, no, and I thoughtthat I I panicked because I
signed up for something wrong,yada, yada.
And the benefits guy is like,no, that doctor's just probably
out of network.
And I'm like, oh, oh, my gosh,I felt like an idiot.
(03:33):
I'm sure the benefitsdepartment is like why is this
person in our hr team?
Well, you know apparently Idon't understand benefits.
Speaker 2 (03:42):
Yeah, like I said, that's not your niche.
I would forgive you if thatwere my team.
Speaker 3 (03:51):
Yeah, yeah, I felt stupid.
Speaker 2 (03:55):
Yeah, and dental is one of those things.
I personally feel someone whodeals with benefits regularly
there's not much differencebetween any of the dental plans,
really between MetLife or DeltaDental or you just go down the
list of all the top dentalproviders, they're so
(04:17):
interchangeable.
But the difference is thenetworks, and I think dentists
move and change networks muchmore than doctors.
I've had that experience myselfwhere, oh, six months ago you
took my insurance and nobodytold me, and now I'm paying out
of pocket for this or I'm payingthe amount for out-of-network
(04:41):
service for this.
I'm like, okay, well, newdentist, next time you don't
need to schedule me anotherappointment in six months.
Speaker 3 (04:48):
And that's a crappy thing because I have well, I
don't think I have it anymore.
I used to have dental anxietyand it took a lot for me to
trust a dentist.
And now you find one, and it'sjust if they change and you're
no longer covered by them.
It's kind of heartbreaking whenyou get close to them.
I I did get over my anxiety,though now I am obsessed with my
(05:13):
12 years of a no cavity and Iam like let's go.
We're going on year 13, 13years no cavities, let's go.
Speaker 2 (05:23):
Yeah, I'm the same way as you when it comes to
dentists and I had.
I went to this one.
Well, backing it way up, donand I went to this dentist and
he retired and we were like,okay, he wasn't as convenient
because we'd moved andeverything, but we'll travel
(05:44):
because we knew him.
But he retired.
So we went to this mega chaindentist it's not mega chain, but
for this area they've got like10 offices and things like that
First dentist I had, she wasawesome, she was great, loved
her to death and theytransferred her to one of their
other locations that I was notgoing to travel that far for her
.
And so then I got this dentistand picture, you know, a
(06:10):
five-foot-tall Joe Rogan typeperson with definite Napoleon
complex, short dude thing.
So that's who they scheduled mewith and I didn't care and for
a long time I had a very badtooth and my previous dentist
had told me hey, this tooth isbad.
One day it will abscess.
(06:32):
Will it be to tomorrow, will itbe next year, will it be 10
years?
We don't know, but it'llabscess and you're going to be
in a situation so you need toget it taken care of.
But even my dentist said Iprefer you to have the natural
tooth in as long as there's noinfection and all this.
And so, as we did that and thedoctor at that practice I really
liked she said the same thing.
She said you know, I'd preferif you got it pulled sooner than
(06:53):
later, but it is better to haveyour natural tooth in there.
And this little Joe Rogan guy,he got like severe attitude with
me.
I really wanted to just punchhim in the face.
I I forget exactly what he said, but he pissed me off so I left
.
I, you know, I didn't even stay.
You know, after he was done thehygienic, I was gone before the
(07:15):
hygienist came back.
I was like, screw you, um, youknow the eric cartman, screw you
guys, I'm god and and I wasgone.
So I left, I didn't go back.
I went somewhere else and Ifound this dentist.
I really like Now, this guy, hewas a stoner, extraordinaire
dentist and he was like hereminded me of Tommy Chong so
much and he played in a band atnight and all this other stuff,
(07:39):
but he was just so cool.
Yeah, dude, I agree.
And he's like old, he's in his60s at this time, but he's, yeah
, dude, I really agree, I justhave this.
You know you're going to wantto get it taken care of, but
let's, you don't have to have itpulled immediately, but, like I
said, it he's as an abscess isall just, whether it's weeks,
months away.
(07:59):
Anyways, I had him forever andhe was really cool and I had the
most coveted slot.
On Monday nights he had a 6 pmslot and he always would say
dude, if you ever go missing,I'm going to know it's one of my
other patients, becauseeverybody wants the 6 pm slot
and you've got it.
You know he's just.
He was really a cool guy and hewas funny and he didn't care
(08:22):
about anything.
He was probably stoned whiledoing my teeth and stuff, but he
was funny and he didn't careabout anything.
He was probably stoned whiledoing my teeth and stuff, but he
was good dentist and I reallyliked him.
Well, he retired and the personthat took over his practice I
didn't know he retired.
I showed up and they didn'ttake my that's a didn't take my
insurance type thing and so Iwent to this other place and
I've been there, I've been happy, but Dawn loves it.
All three of the dentists arelike super hotties, she says,
(08:46):
and she's like I need to go getmy teeth cleaned again.
I think I have a bad tooth thatneeds looked at.
It's like they're yeah,everybody there is like Dawn.
Speaker 3 (08:57):
Why are you going to the dentist every other week?
Speaker 2 (08:59):
Yeah, exactly so.
Anyways, benefits World, it'sso much fun, it's so much fun,
it's so much fun.
I think the the benefitsepisode will be a lot of fun.
Good there, so yeah, oh, andalso I was talking about how
well the ratings were last month.
Y'all, I have y'all reallyliked our last episode with the
(09:21):
something about sherm.
Just touched a nerve yeah, like,and I went back episodes like
when we had baked hr on and thatit was.
It was supposed to be a shortysitting on sherm.
We were supposed to just like,do a 15, 20 minute episode.
That's all we planned for andit we I think we edited it down
to an hour over an hour,something like that.
(09:43):
But that one, when we hit anerve, when we talk about SHRM,
removing the E from the DEI orwhatever I forget the name of
that that episode did well.
So when we talk about SHRM,y'all respond.
So I'm going to have to come upwith more dirt or something on
SHRM or something along thoselines to keep y'all coming back
(10:04):
and things on SHRM or somethingalong those lines to keep you
all coming back and things.
Those episodes I was tellingCece when Kevin was on that
episode actually and it wasn't ajaded episode was the number
one download for that year, thehighest most downloads for that
year, and the SHRM episode, atleast in the first seven days,
is outperforming that one.
So I'm going to go gloat after.
Speaker 3 (10:25):
this podcast, at least in the first seven days,
is outperforming that one.
Speaker 2 (10:28):
I'm going to go gloat .
After this podcast, we have acompetition.
He's welcome to come back andtry and regain the throne, I
guess.
Speaker 3 (10:36):
It's on.
I have a SHRM confession tomake.
Uh-oh, I didn't know this, butI let my SHRM certification
lapse when I was pregnant.
I wasn't in an HR state of mindand I went on about a month ago
and I realized that mycertification has lapsed.
(10:58):
Now to recertify, you have todo the credits to say, hey, I'm
still learning, I'm still smart.
Well, since I didn't do that,the only way to get recertified
is to take the damn test.
So now there's the jaded partof me that's like fuck that, I'm
not doing that again, whatever.
(11:19):
And then there's the overachiever side of me that just
really wants a certification.
It's like the devil and theangel on my shoulder.
And now I'm devastated that Ilost the letters.
Speaker 2 (11:33):
What does your new job have to?
Is it something they encourage,they want they?
What is their opinion?
Speaker 3 (11:39):
I don't know, actually I have to do some
digging.
That's a good question.
Yeah, we'll see.
Speaker 2 (11:46):
Yeah, I will not take that test again.
I'm so ashamed I let it lapse.
Speaker 3 (11:49):
Do you see that behind me?
You see that that's a lie.
Speaker 2 (11:55):
So there's no other option other than you're so far
out that you can't take the exam.
You have to take the exam.
Speaker 3 (12:03):
Yeah, it's been a year.
Speaker 2 (12:06):
My assistant.
She got her SHRM CP back inFebruary.
I'm really proud of her fordoing that.
But we would do the SHRM study,the quiz questions and things
like that and I would say justfor fun hey, let's check out
what the SHRM SCP questions,quiz questions are and things
like that, what the Serm SCPquestions, quiz questions are
and things like that.
I thought the SCP questionswere easier than the CP
(12:30):
questions.
When we were doing that, I waslike I'm like I'm batting less
than 500 and you know, doing thequizzes together.
I studied with her and I hadfun doing that honestly and I
was learning too.
But when it came down to quiz,I was, I was, I was at less than
500 and getting them right andthe questions right.
(12:51):
And then we let's, let's trythe scp ones for this unit and
we were getting.
She was getting them right tooand it's not like it's something
because I have so muchexperience or anything like that
.
I was was like is the SCPeasier than the CP?
I don't know.
Speaker 3 (13:07):
So no, I didn't take the CP, I took the SHRM.
What is it?
I'm sorry, the HCR the.
Speaker 1 (13:15):
SPHR yeah.
Speaker 3 (13:18):
So I took the PHR, not the SPHR, and I remember I
failed that exam once.
I cried in the bathroom.
I took it again, I passed itand it was a lot of
regurgitation of terms, ofdefinitions, of like kind of
(13:39):
things that you know but youdon't know.
Know Like contextuallyually youdon't have everything memorized
verbatim or stuff like that.
But then when I took that SCP,it seemed that it was more more
rational thinking, more logicalthinking.
Here's a scenario how would youdeal in this scenario?
(14:00):
And it's like, well, that'sfucking easy.
Like not easy.
I shouldn't say it's easy, butit's easier, as someone who's
been working in the HR field, tobe like okay, my experience
tells me that you knowda-da-da-da.
And I felt that that's whatmade the SCP easier was that it
(14:30):
was more scenario-based as itwas.
Speaker 2 (14:31):
Tell me exactly what the the something, something act
of 1971 did and I don't,fucking, I don't know, like you
know, I can google, that youknow, if I ever need to know, I
will google that have you metchat gpt knows everything.
Yeah, I hear yeah, I well, my, Itook.
Well, I got the PHR in 2003.
And then, rather thanrecertifying, I got my SPHR in
2006.
(14:51):
And I kept that going.
And then, after the, I call itthe divorce between HRCI and
SHRM.
Yeah, because it got ugly therefor a little while.
But SHRM did the smartest thingin the world hey, watch this 10
minute powerpoint and we'llconvert your sphr to a sherm scp
.
So I'm like I'm on it, I did it.
(15:11):
Well, my, my employer at thattime didn't appreciate, or
didn't you know they weren'tsupporting and getting credits.
There weren't, as there thereare hardly any free credits, it
seemed like out there.
So I was on my own and so aftera while I let it lapse.
And then, when I got my currentjob, my boss told me out next,
next cycle, I want you to takeyour, get your certification
(15:34):
again.
I'm like, okay, so I did and Igot it the the sherm scp.
But yeah, it was, it was reallyinteresting.
And but to think that and Ithink I never thought of it then
, but until you said it, yeah, Ithink that in my mind the CP
was harder because it's justregurgitation of some.
What is the Mavis-Bacon Act orwhatever?
(15:57):
I can't even do it.
What is this and what is that?
Speaker 3 (16:01):
Mavis-Bacon taught me typing.
Speaker 2 (16:03):
That's it, that's the typing.
But see, you don't even know,but when you can apply what
knowledge you do have.
It seemed easier.
So maybe if you have even amild amount of experience, that
the SCP might be easier.
But who knows?
Speaker 3 (16:20):
I will say I was in, so my previous company.
They were very much into thecertifications, so this is a few
years ago.
They had paid not only for meto get my certification but they
had also paid for me to attendthese prep courses and this is
graduate level once a week,three hours a week.
They took it seriously and itwas very helpful.
(16:41):
And I'm laughing because I'm inthe class and we're reviewing
court cases that have happenedand there was one for quid pro
quo sexual harassment and it wasit happened in my hometown of
boca raton, florida, so it waslike it was the person's last
name, like flanderson versusboca raton, and I like excuse me
(17:03):
, this is hometown Florida pride, right here, of course, there's
a famous court case involvingsexual harassment.
That is Florida proud.
But it just made me laughbecause it was just such a
random place.
Speaker 2 (17:20):
Yeah, going back eons and eons in the 90s.
I remember specifically beingin college in an HR class and us
discussing that you could nothave same-sex sexual harassment
because that wasn't considered athing and you couldn't have
subordinate on supervisorharassment because the manager
(17:40):
should be the manager.
Imagine that and knock that oneout, deal with the problem.
And I just remember veryspecifically, I think the same
sex harassment something'stelling me it was an American
Airlines case, but back thenthat does evolve and change.
(18:01):
I mean we're talking 30 plusyears but HR does evolve and
change and nothing's changedmore than it has the last
hundred and some odd days in HR,it seems.
But I won't go too deep intothat.
Speaker 3 (18:17):
Oh, it's ever-changing landscapes apes.
Speaker 2 (18:30):
Well, my topic for today was I wanted to do a
continuation on my experience atthe virginia sherm conference,
because y'all seem to like ustalking and shitting on sherm
and and things like that.
Well, this time I'm going to betalking about the conference,
but I'm going to be talkingabout the attendees, and maybe
there's some of you out herethat I'm going to be talking
about and, yeah, some of youattendees are really got the.
(18:50):
It seems like people have lostall etiquette and decorum and
things like that.
So I want to think of this asabout being a good conference
attendee.
Speaker 3 (19:02):
I feel like this needs intro music and a theme
song.
Speaker 2 (19:09):
Be a good attendee, like an instructional video from
the 90s.
Well, and I actually wrote downnotes.
I've been doing more noteslately than I've been doing in a
long time, but my number onebullet is shut the fuck up.
So that's my number one bulletfor being a good attendee, and
(19:29):
I've got some bullets.
Speaker 3 (19:31):
Shut your mouth.
Speaker 2 (19:33):
Don't ask stupid questions.
If your question pertains onlyto you, don't ask it in front of
everybody.
Take it offline and if you havea question you know, keep it at
the 10 000 foot level bigpicture so everybody can learn
from.
Well, I have jane doe and shedoes this and I and get really
in the weeds with theirsituation.
(19:54):
I don't.
Nobody else wants to hear that.
Oh, here's another thing.
No, don't interrupt and makeasinine comments that add no
value to anybody else in theroom.
Going along the same line,there was this one lady in one
of the breakout sessions I wasin and she would just no
question involved.
Say, well, my company doesda-da-da-da-da, like she's
(20:17):
looking for some sort ofaffirmation.
Oh yes, good girl, pat you onthe head.
Your company is doing excellent, no question, it's just a
comment, my company does this.
Good for you.
Speaker 3 (20:33):
Nobody wants to hear that SHRM does not give gold
stars.
Everything at SHRM costs money.
They're not going to give you agold star for doing your job.
Speaker 2 (20:41):
But they give you the badge bling that says like I
got the HR dude badge bling andI did not get that.
I love HR.
And the lady, the lady, whenI'm up there getting the HR dude
and the Sherm SCP littleribbons that you put on your
your name tag and things likethat, she goes you want that.
I love HR.
I said oh no.
I said oh no.
Speaker 3 (21:03):
Can I just tell you I'm a sucker for that kind of
nonsense like the bling.
I went to SHRM and I went crazyover those stupid ribbons.
I was first time attendee, shrm, scp talent.
Well, I think I had like sevenribbons on there just like
(21:26):
layered.
Don't threaten me with a goodtime for Medals of Valor over
there.
I'm down.
Yeah, hr Valor.
Speaker 2 (21:37):
It was funny.
Those were funny ways.
Like I said, I didn't have anawful time.
It could have been better, butI didn't have an awful time.
But under STFU, bullet numberthree, nobody wants to hear your
uh-huhs, that's right, and allyour loud comments to yourself
throughout the I had someonebehind me was just doing that
the entire breakout session andI'm like okay, this is getting
(22:00):
too, too bad and not a showingof the rocky horror picture show
you do not have to interact dowe have a first?
anybody here, it's their firsttime do they even show the rocky
horror.
The place what used to showhere doesn't anymore.
Speaker 3 (22:14):
I do it's been a while since I've been to one
yeah, the gen, the gen zers arenot going to know.
Speaker 2 (22:23):
All that is the rocky horror picture show.
It's it's.
It's a suck-ass movie, but it'sthe experience, it's an
experience.
It's an experience.
It's not suck-ass, but it's nota great movie.
It's great in my heart.
And you can't watch it becauseif you watch it on TV, I know
I'm going down another rabbithole.
(22:44):
You just don't get the samething out of it as being there
in the theater and things likethat.
So anyways, agreed, bullet fourunder STFU, take your sidebars
outside.
Let me tell you I had it was abreakout session.
It was in the main rooms andthere was maybe 60 people in the
(23:04):
room and the room held hundredsof people and the people the
lady behind me is just liketalking and talking, talking to
person beside her and and Iactually had interest in the
topic and wanted to listen.
So I said I turned around andsaid excuse me, like two or
three times and then I just gotup and I moved like five seats
over to get away from directlybehind them and they kept going.
(23:27):
I couldn't hear the speaker andI just finally I said it in a
not loud, not soft voice sayexcuse me.
I moved because I couldn't hearbecause of you.
Can you please, can you pleasebe quiet so we could hear?
And but yeah, I that I foundthat just extremely rude.
And then my final stfu bulletwas if you ask, can you get a
(23:50):
copy of the slides, just get up,go, you know, play in traffic
somewhere.
I, that is one of my can we geta copy of the slides?
And they've even told you, hey,this most of the presenters
slides are going to be availablethrough the app, the, the
seminar app or whatever it was aconference app and things like
like that.
Can we get a copy of the slides?
(24:10):
That just kills me.
That was bullet point numberone.
Bullet point number two oh, Ihad a little bit of time.
It didn't take me that long,but I had a little time on my
hand.
I was motivated.
Technology is my next bullet.
Oh, yeah, a silence.
(24:36):
Your phone people.
You know you, you might be themost important person in your
entire company I'm sure you arebecause you're an hr pro and
things.
But you know, put it on quiet.
Everybody has a phone, a smartwatch.
I nowadays, I don't ever havethe volume on my phone on
because I'll get a buzz on mywatch and I look at it.
Okay, I'll accept, declinewhatever, get rid of it, but you
(24:58):
don't need a loud ringer.
And if it does for you, oh, goahead.
Speaker 3 (25:04):
I was gonna say it's funny that you say that, because
there was a time when I was ateenager where we used to pay
like $2 for a ringtone so thatwe could be like the person to
have Blink-182 playing in apolyphonic melody.
And now I don't remember.
I don't even know what ringtoneI have on.
It's never been on.
I have never had my phone on.
(25:27):
It's always been vibrating onmy watch, or just vibration.
I don't want to hear it.
I don't want to hear it in mypersonal life.
I certainly don't want to hearyours.
Speaker 2 (25:36):
And the only time I will say that I turn the ringer
on on my phone is like when mywife is traveling or flying or
something.
I want to make sure that Idon't miss any phone calls or
anything like that.
I will turn it on then, but itusually goes right back off
anyways.
But if your phone does ring,for Christ's sake don't answer
(25:57):
it.
Or if you do answer it, sayhold on and get out of the room
and don't have your conversationin the room.
I just common sense people.
Bullet point three undertechnology.
And I will admit this isprobably a shortcoming of mine,
just because I'm an oldcurmudgeon-y guy and maybe
because when I went to collegepeople didn't take computers.
(26:19):
Nobody had a laptop in theearly 90s that I knew, at least
In my fraternity.
I was the only person with adesktop computer in my
fraternity.
So yeah, there weren't a lot ofcomputers.
You went to the computer lab.
But anyways, the clicking onthe 7 am breakout, the 7.30 am
(26:45):
breakout session, and I liveover an hour and a half away and
I'm not a morning person.
I got up there, I got in, I gotthere on time, ready to go, and
this person is.
It sounded like she had afreaking typewriter.
I was just waiting for thatding and then the return noise
as it returns.
It was so loud and it was Idon't know I.
I was like do you?
I wanted to turn around just tosee did she have a typewriter?
(27:08):
I've never heard a keyboardthat loud on a computer in my
life.
Speaker 3 (27:13):
It was so yeah that that I was that person, I'm that
person I don't think you couldhave a keyboard that loud I have
nails and my nailsclickety-clack on a keyboard and
that is I.
I was in a conference once andsomeone I think they I don't
(27:34):
know if there's a sensoryreaction to pen clicking, like
people.
I know that drives people crazy.
This person thought I wasclicking my pen.
No, I was clickety clacking onmy keyboard.
And the guy like interruptedthe whole session and was just
like can someone stop clickingtheir pen?
(27:54):
And I was like, and this islike 70 people in a room?
And I was just I think that wasme.
So anyway, I'm so paranoid oftyping in public now no, I can't
imagine that being justfingernails.
Speaker 2 (28:07):
That was like it felt .
It sounded like mechanicalpushed down hard key strokes
that you would have to do withthat.
It was really, really bad.
My fourth bullet undertechnology, taking pictures of
every goddamn slide.
Oh yeah, this makes it allbetter.
(28:30):
First, the session that thelady that was sitting directly
in front of me was doing thisone a.
It was on ai and hr.
So I'm like, you're not evenready for windows 3.1, much less
ai and hr.
But she had.
I've never seen an ipad it wasan ipad brand this big.
I mean my computer, my laptopmonitor is 15 inches, I think it
(28:54):
was bigger than that and shestood up and took a picture of
each slide.
Not only that, but each time ananimation came and a new thing
came on new line, she'd stand upagain and then triple down on
that.
She had the little shuttersound on her ginormous iPad.
(29:15):
So every time she hit thebutton to take a picture or
whatever the sound is that, itdoes it, and I was just I was
losing it.
But, like I said, the monitoron my laptop in front of me is
15 inches.
It was an iPad and it wasbigger than that.
(29:35):
I've never seen anything thatbig.
It was crazy.
Speaker 3 (29:40):
But the shutter sound on and all this, I'm like yeah
it was bad and also the slideswill be given to you.
Speaker 1 (29:50):
Yes.
Speaker 3 (29:51):
You don't have to take a picture of the slides.
Speaker 2 (29:53):
Yeah, and standing up to do it too.
Not only did she stand up, sheheld her ginormous iPad up above
her head as she's doing it, andI think my grandmother, who's
still alive at 106 years old,could do better than she could
at dealing with this stuff.
Aw.
Speaker 3 (30:10):
Grandma.
Speaker 2 (30:14):
Anybody is years old could do better than she could
at dealing with this grandma.
Anybody is.
Bullet number three bespatially aware.
This is a something that's lefthuman beings for eons.
You know we've lost the abilityto be spatially aware.
Whether you're in the grocerystore or at a conference, like
there's to the main room wherethe big speakers were was a
(30:36):
corridor and of course one wallof the corridor has sponsors and
tables and things like that.
So your corridor space is cutin a third right then.
And then you just have peoplejust all of a sudden decide
they're going to stop in themiddle of this busy corridor and
have their little conversationand block the progress for
everybody else when, hey, I'vegot to be in the other building
(30:57):
in five minutes for my session Iwant to do.
Just get against the wall, takeit out of the corridor area, do
something, but don't have yourketchup in the middle of the
corridor.
Be spatially aware in themiddle of the quarter, be
spatially aware.
I'm like, ah, and then my finalbullet is have some fucking
self-respect.
I absolutely.
(31:19):
You're so salty.
I have some fuckingself-respect.
These people don't.
How many of those stupidshopping bag totes with whatever
stupid vendor that you're nevergoing to use or hear from again
.
Do you need?
These people are lining up andthe same thing pisses me off at
(31:39):
Costco or Sam's Club or anythinglike that People lining up for
your little two-ounce sample offlavored water or a granola bar,
that you're getting like onethirty-second of a granola bar
and you're lining up for thatcrap and that.
But they're lining up to getthis, this shopping bags and
things like that.
I walked around the exhibitorhalls and things like.
(32:01):
I just looked around.
I didn't.
The only piece of swag Iactually got was UKG was one of
the premier sponsors, was likeputting it in your hand as you
walked by and it was in mygoodwill pile.
I had never even made it insidethe house, it was in the
goodwill pile in the garage bythe time I got home.
But but they some of thesepeople I kid you not were going
(32:25):
like losing their shit overthese shopping bags and had one
of those shopping bags with likesix other shopping bags more
than six shopping bags inside,had one of those shopping bags
with like six other shoppingbags, more than six shopping
bags inside of it.
That's what they were, the swagitems they wanted to pick up.
And you know the only thingthat I don't have any dogs
anymore.
Mine are all across the littlerainbow bridge but there was
(32:46):
some, like had a little tennisball.
I was like, oh, if my dog wasstill around I'd get that, I'd
go by and pick that up andthings like that.
But people, you're hoarding,this is hoarding.
You're the people I do not wantbringing something in for
potluck lunch because you've gotthe cat hair and you've got the
other stuff.
You're the reason I will noteat at a potluck.
Speaker 3 (33:09):
I do a potluck, I will say popular opinion.
I very much dislike swag.
I am not a swag person For alot of the reasons that you just
said, because I A I'm too lazyto bring it home Like there's
nothing.
There's assuming that I go tothese things and I'm traveling
and I'm on a plane and, like youknow, there's the logistics of
(33:33):
all this crap.
I won't bring it home.
The only way I'll lose my crapover something, if it's
something like that is of anykind of useful value to me oh,
give me like an upgraded powerbank, or I'll do that.
Or maybe, if you have a StanleyCup that you have branded with
your logo, I'll do that.
Or maybe, if you have a Stanleycup that you have branded with
your logo, I'll do that.
(33:54):
But I'm not gonna stand in linefor a pop socket of a brand
that I don't use.
That's just for me.
I don't, I don't care.
And I remember I went to a Shermevent once and I met up with
you know, you meet someone thereand you start to kind of chat
and walk around with them andshe was a swag person, she was a
(34:16):
swag girly and I don't.
I don't need this crappy 89cent water branded water bottle.
I don't need it.
So anyway, I don't.
I'm not a swag person, again,unless it's something cool.
How about a nice for my company, right, put a nice company logo
(34:37):
and hoodie.
I'm all about that Because,again, some days you're lazy and
you work from home and you justwant to throw on a hoodie and
it's company branded and you'rein dress code and it's so easy
and wonderful.
I'll do that all day.
Coffee mug, sure, but no, Idon't want it.
For a company that I don't evenuse, unless I work there.
(34:58):
I don't want it.
Speaker 2 (34:59):
When we moved now I don't drink coffee, my wife does
, and when we moved we've gotrid of literally hundreds of
coffee mugs.
Things we picked up over theyears former employers well,
former employers of mine, she'sbeen things we picked up over
the years, former employers,former employers of mine as
she's only she's been the sameplace 17 plus years but former
employers of mine and justthings you pick up and you get
(35:20):
somewhere where you're like no,no, no, no, and like you're one
person and she saved like sixcoffee cups and mugs and that's
it, and now she's basically onlyusing her Stanley-style cups
for her coffees now.
So those four, six, whatever wesaved, are just gathering dust
somewhere in a cabinet somewhere.
Speaker 3 (35:41):
Yeah, I can't tell you how many mugs and cups that
we've purged over the years.
Speaker 2 (35:48):
It's like no, and Goodwill doesn't even want that
shit anymore yeah, I don't needan adp mug.
Speaker 3 (35:56):
I don't even use adp as an hris.
Why would I want this?
Speaker 2 (36:01):
yeah, exactly, and I, yeah, just.
But I will say, on the swag end, when I did college recruiting,
we I think our swag budget wasa little bit higher.
We got some cool toys and neatthings.
Let's see, when did I quitdoing?
Stop doing that.
I think I did that in 2005 iswhen I stopped.
(36:21):
So it's been a long time sinceI've been recruiting, but at the
end of the conference none ofthe recruiters wanted to pack up
their shit.
They're like giving it to otherrecruiters and stuff like that,
because the recruiters havebetter stuff.
At least in the 90s or 2005when I quit doing that, you had
(36:44):
cool stuff and I would get somethings to take home to my kids
and things like that.
But after we were closing, hey,before you pack away, can I get
one of those for my kid?
Yeah, yeah, have it.
Can I get a Frisbee?
Yeah, you know we would swagtrade on doing that, but none of
the recruiters wanted to packtheir crap up.
Speaker 3 (37:02):
So, yeah, Although I will say I have a natural love
and a gift for actually creatinggood swag.
Nothing gets people more crazythan having like a limited
edition of something.
Speaker 2 (37:15):
Okay.
Speaker 3 (37:16):
And the same goes for company swag.
And I would say, if you do haveinvite only programs or
anything like that, likeleadership programs or something
like that, invest in somereally good programs or
something like that.
Invest in some really good Idon't know, like whatever.
Whatever water bottle or shitis popular at the moment and you
(37:37):
get that branded with the yearand only x number were made and
it's only for participants.
People lose their mind for thatstuff.
Speaker 2 (37:46):
They want it well, the only other job my wife has
had as an adult well, actuallyshe started before she was an
adult was at, I guess you mighteven say, people's former
favorite French company, target.
She was there for a very longtime.
I think their reputation hassort of taken a nosedive
recently.
Speaker 3 (38:07):
Some stupid decisions .
Speaker 2 (38:09):
So she was.
They did these, these things,for they called them hypo
classes.
So you got identified as a highpotential person and a swag
they got was really she's still.
She's been at her currentcompany 17 years and she did the
hypo because she ended upmoving into management there
somewhere along her her career,but she's.
(38:29):
We still have this attache bagtarget and it's like hypo I
don't even know the year that'swritten on it or anything like
that hypo team or a class ofwhatever, and it was a nice
high-end attache bag thing andlike, yeah, we'll put our to
this day for traveling and weneed to take our computers with
(38:52):
us.
That's, that's what she usesand and.
But where I was going to go withthis is people who were not
high potentials got pissed whenthey see, you know, here here's
dawn, in her little attache orher hoodie or whatever that says
you know, hypo class of 2010.
I don't have it would have beenlonger than that, but no, maybe
(39:14):
I don't know.
Yeah, too long or not.
She's been gone since then, butyou know, whatever, the hypo
class of whatever is they.
Those people got to go tominnesota.
They got to do this extratrainings and development and,
and and the people who were notselected?
Were they probably?
I bet most of them left prettyquickly.
She was telling me about allthese people sneering at her.
(39:36):
I'm like, do your fucking joband you can be.
It's not that hard to be a hypo.
Speaker 3 (39:41):
Yeah, so one of the things that I don't know if
you're familiar with theLevenger brand, but they make
like disc notebooks.
Okay, I'm not familiar with likethis notebook either so they're
leather leather front, leatherback, and then the only thing
that binds them are these really?
They're literally discs andthey're like loose discs.
But once it's specially paper,specially punched, so once it's
(40:04):
all together it looks reallycool.
But anyway, I got I call Ilovingly call them Flevenger
because it's like the OfficeDepot version, but it's like the
same kind of disk system.
Anyway, I special ordered thosethrough the website and if you
special order them through thewebsite you can get them
embossed.
So they basically take anembossing thing and emboss the
leather.
So I got the acronym of theprogram, which was MDP.
(40:28):
I got that embossed and all 20participants got one of those
like fancy leather notebookswith the MDP embossed in it.
People lost their damn minds andthis is one of the similar
programs where people wouldtravel in all over from the
country and yada, yada, and yeah, people lost their minds.
(40:48):
I got calls, I got everything,like can I get one of those?
And I'm like, no, you have tobe part of the program to get
one of these binders.
Sorry, you can't sit with us.
Try again next year.
I don't know what to tell you.
Speaker 2 (41:03):
Not a cool kid.
Also, a company I work with gotthese really nice faux leather
but what do you call them?
Portfolios that you know youcan hold a pen, a calculator,
business cards, a notepad andthings like that.
They were faux leather but theywere embossed with the company
(41:25):
logo and all the new hires gotone on their first day and they
had it before I started and butwe got to the point where people
would keep coming in.
Well, first, one time my the hrsupply room got raided and like
dozens of them ended up missing, which you know, along with
some of the nicer polos thatwere really supposed to be for
(41:48):
managers.
Speaker 3 (41:49):
but I, I'm like this is why we can't have nice things
yeah.
Speaker 2 (41:52):
And that's what ultimately happened.
They wanted to do budget cutsand those damn portfolios.
I fought for them becauseeverybody loved them, and it was
, you know.
Oh, and the next person wehired oh, you started and you
didn't get one of these reallycool portfolios.
I mean, I have mine somewherestill.
It was a really good, niceproduct, and it was, you know.
(42:14):
I even tried.
I told him I wanted to keep itand I said I'll go for a lesser
brand, a cheaper product.
You know, I think this was a isit K-Swiss or something Swiss
brand or something.
It was really nice but like,yeah, we could, I could go to a
lesser brand and I can save afew dollars per one.
And no, they didn't want to dothat.
So, okay, those went away and Iwas like I would just hate to
(42:36):
be that next person.
You know, our this, thisrecruiting class got our last
one and then the next recruitingclass sorry, you get.
You get a t-shirt and a littleplastic cup and whatever else.
Speaker 3 (42:49):
And a ballpoint pen.
Speaker 2 (42:52):
Yeah, exactly so.
Swag is good, you can have somegood things with it, but the
stuff they're giving away at theSherpa conferences, there's
nothing.
Like I said, one of thecompanies had a tennis ball If I
still had a dog I would havegrabbed it but no dog, no ball.
So yeah, y'all are hoarders,but no dog, no ball.
(43:13):
So yeah, y'all are hoarders.
So that's really all that I hadfor today.
You have anything else?
Speaker 3 (43:22):
I got nothing.
I came a little unprepared totoday's meeting, so I apologize.
I provided some great insight,though oh, I will say you know,
you reminded me.
Yeah, I gave myself credit.
I provided great insight as shepassed herself on the back.
You did.
So I will say just your wholetopic of being a good conference
(43:43):
attendee.
A few weeks ago, three of ourfriends went out to a comedy
club, and one of which she's alovely person, she's just also a
messy person and I guess shehad a few drinks before she went
to the comedy club pre-game andwhile she was which is, yeah,
just a classic pre-game which II cannot pre-game anymore, that
(44:04):
is that, that's just it would.
It would be bad, but I wouldactually.
So, anyway, she pre-games, shegoes to the comedy club, they
have an opener to warm everyoneup and she started heckling the
person and then she wasdrunkenly heckling them and just
kind of being rude.
(44:24):
Our other two friends were justso embarrassed they're like
we're not with her and finallyshe was just like this sucks,
I'm out of here and she stumblesout.
She got an uber, she's fine,she's messy, but she's
responsible.
And anyway, the punchline of thestory is that, as they were
leaving my one of the friendsthat remained.
She has one of those wearableslike the ai wearables, okay, and
(44:48):
she lets it play all day, shelets it record all day.
So she lets it record all day,so it just gives her end of day
notes and it picked up the wholeinteraction of the friend
heckling the comedian and beingvery rude by the way rude and it
just gave my friend articles ofhow to be a good audience
attendance and I thought thatwas fucking hilarious.
(45:11):
She was like, yeah, the aithing, just heard the whole
conversation hold the, heard thewhole interacting at
interaction and then sent herarticles on how to behave proper
etiquette at a live show and Iwas like this is how, this is
how ai will save the future oh,I'm, I'm all in.
Speaker 2 (45:30):
if that's the case, all in.
I love that.
I was hoping for a story,because I don't go to.
I've been to a comedy clubs, Idon't know a few times, not that
many, but it seems like everytime I go there's a heckler, the
drunk guy.
Speaker 3 (45:45):
So stupid.
Speaker 2 (45:46):
And I love when the comedian just stops and they've
prepared for this.
You know they're ready.
You can't say anything to them.
They haven't heard before.
You know, like going back towhen I was umpiring, you know
the saying is you never arguewith umpires.
It's like mud wrestling with apig.
It's fun until you realize thepig enjoys it and the heckler is
(46:06):
ready for anything.
You may think you're thecoolest, smartest, wittiest
person.
They've heard it before andthey've got a comeback ready for
you.
And I went to this one guy.
I actually ended up feeling alittle bit bad for the heckler.
I couldn't remember what hesaid, but the comedian just
decided, oh, it's on, and justdestroyed the guy and then the
(46:29):
guy got taken out.
He didn't say anything moreafter the heckler started.
But after the heckler was it?
The guys in the yellow shirtshad him leaving Bye-bye.
It's like I said before, I lovewatching that Torrance of
Yellowstone.
I'm always rooting for thebuffalo or the moose or whatever
animal it is.
(46:50):
I'm like, yeah, just yeah gorethem, stomp them, it's a natural
selection yep, exactly so.
Speaking of selection, you canselect to become a patreon
supporter.
You just follow the links tothe show.
It sounds a great saying show.
Follow the links to the shownotes and support us on Patreon,
like Hallie, the original JadedHR rock star, bill or Mike.
(47:13):
So thank you for your support.
I haven't checked reviewslately.
I meant to do that before theshow, so next show I will see if
there's any reviews, but pleaseleave us a review.
We will read it good, bad anddifferent on there.
And if you're not using ApplePodcasts, send it to us so we
know about the review, becausethere's so many other good pods
and pod friends and all theseother places that I just can't
(47:36):
check them all.
There's a review out there, solet us know and we'll read those
on there.
But give us a review.
It helps us grow and I promise,promise, promise.
A week from today you will haveOffice Rewatch Episode 2,
diversity Day.
It will be there, I promise,not in 2026.
Speaker 3 (47:54):
I know it's like Lucy with the football it might be
there, it might not, who knows?
Speaker 2 (47:59):
It's your fault, charlie Brown, for falling for
it every single time.
You block it Every time.
All righty With all that.
Let's see here the intro is thevoice artist is andrew colpa,
who does the intro, and then themusic is underscore orchestra
devil, the devil, and now, asalways, I'm warren I'm cc and
(48:19):
we're here helping you survive.
Hr one.
What the fuck moment at a timeyeah, thank you.
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