February 16, 2024 • 59 mins
Have you ever walked into a room and felt like you owned it? That magnetic pull isn't by chance; it's by design. Our latest episode with the extraordinary Bubune unlocks the secrets behind crafting an unforgettable first impression and the art of personal branding. We delve into the psychology of color choices in our wardrobe, the undeniable influence of our upbringing on self-reliance, and the delicate balance between familial responsibilities and personal ambitions. It's a candid exploration of the stories we tell through our appearance, and Bubune’s insights will leave you reflecting on your own narrative long after the conversation ends.
Imagine Chris Brown stepping out in something uncharacteristically ordinary—it just wouldn't make sense. Similarly, your personal style speaks volumes before you even utter a word. We dissect how dressing for success isn't just a catchy phrase, but a strategic move that can alter perceptions and outcomes in professional and personal settings. From negotiating tables to first dates, the clothes you choose are your silent advocates. And as we trade tales of styling victories, remember: when it comes to fashion, intentionality is king.
But what happens after the initial impression? We don't just stop at the surface. Peel back the layers of self-care and personal development, especially within the realms of relationships and marriage. I get real about the societal pressures that can cloud the importance of self-investment and share a personal journey through self-improvement. Because, at its core, our message is clear: personal development is an unending journey, essential for living a life brimming with intention and purpose. Tune in and transform not just how the world sees you, but how you see yourself.
Watch the video episode of this on YouTube - https://linktr.ee/konnectedminds
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Transcript
Episode Transcript
Available transcripts are automatically generated. Complete accuracy is not guaranteed.
Speaker 1 (00:00):
First impressions always count and it's always
leaves people thinking who youreally are as a lady.
I think you should be able todress appropriately depending on
where you're going.
Even if you want to look sexy,you can look sexy and appealing
at the same time.
Then looking trashy, you'realways dressed by how you look.
(00:22):
Trust me, I think people shouldactually be able to express
themselves.
If you want to be addressed asa bologna, you have to start
dressing like when Peopleusually try to resonate with
yourself than your brand.
Whatever I want to achieve inlife, if I don't get up and do
(00:44):
it myself, nobody's going tosave me.
So that's me.
Speaker 2 (00:55):
And thank you so much .
Ladies and gentlemen, my nameis Derek A and today you're
tuned in once again to theConnected Minds podcast, where
one good conversation, of course, can change a million lives.
You know, everyone needs tohave an identity.
So today, the conversationwe're going to have it's around
(01:17):
brand identity, because we havea specialist in the house.
Her name is Bubonay.
Everyone knows her as Bivé.
Now she's worked with a lot ofcelebrities, a lot of brands, a
lot of CEOs and I'm sure I'mgoing to be one of her customers
very soon and I believe today,if you stick around, you're
(01:38):
going to understand why youshould appear good the first day
the world come here.
I'm glad you came.
I'm glad you're with us today.
Speaker 1 (01:48):
I'm excited, let's go .
Speaker 2 (01:52):
So we're meeting London.
You can't remember yeah.
Speaker 1 (01:55):
I do.
Speaker 2 (01:55):
We're meeting London.
We're meeting Barking.
Samuel was around.
There's quite a few peoplearound and you remember what I
was wearing.
Speaker 1 (02:05):
I do, yeah, I do.
Speaker 2 (02:07):
That's interesting.
Speaker 1 (02:08):
Yes, and I don't even remember the older people that
we met that day.
Honestly, like I said,impressions first impressions
always count, and it's alwaysleaves people thinking who you
really are.
So I bid everyone to that,irrespective of where you are in
(02:32):
life, always make sure that,wherever you go, you leave a mac
Before you even start talking.
Let people wonder who theperson?
Who is this?
Who is this person?
Like your appearance should beable to attract people enough to
make people want to be friendswith you in a very positive way.
(02:55):
Yes, so my ideal way of livingis my life is always like a
runway, so you have to live yourlife as a runway.
So every day has to bememorable, even if it's a
t-shirt you're wearing.
Make it standard.
Yeah, Interesting.
Speaker 2 (03:17):
You know I like t-shirts a lot.
And white over the years, whitehas become my favorite color.
Oh wow, it's actually my wifethat said I think white is your
favorite color.
I didn't think so, but Irealized I wear white a lot,
like almost everything.
Speaker 1 (03:33):
I want white, it's white to always leave you
responsible, because you arealways careful when you're out
there.
Imagine you being in black allthe time.
You can splash stubs on yourshirt and not even think about
it, but when you have white on,you're always careful about what
you think and when I wasgrowing up, I used to be clumsy
(03:54):
as well, really.
Speaker 2 (03:55):
So, yeah, whenever I eat, I spill a bit, I spill a
bit, and my son is doing thatnow.
You know what are you doing?
I know where he got it from hegot it from you.
So transitioning to white islike now.
I'm a lot more careful when I'meating and drinking and things
(04:17):
like that.
But what was your upbringing?
Speaker 1 (04:21):
like my upbringing, I would say I don't usually have
anything to say because I camefrom a broken home, honestly.
So a lot of things didn't workout for me as a child.
(04:41):
The last time I saw my mom anddad together was about seven,
when I was seven years, and thatwas it.
So I've been on my own for thelongest time, even though I had
to stay with people, but thekind of love and affection that
you would get from like bothparents or like co-parents, and
(05:02):
I didn't get that.
So at a very tender age Istarted looking out for myself
and I've had this for thelongest time that nobody's going
to save you, and that is what Ihave used in my life all these
years.
Nobody's going to work for me,nobody's going to get the job
done for me.
Whatever I want to achieve inlife, if I don't get up and
(05:23):
doing myself, nobody's going tosave me.
So that's me.
So I tried to put in 100% noprocrastination.
I don't procrastinate, trust me, because coming from a child
who wears, you don't really getthe love and the support from
the people that you think wereyour God at that time.
(05:45):
You know our parents areusually our first God on earth.
So if you don't get that, youfall, you become very lonely.
You become a child that, ifcare is not taken, you lose
confidence in yourself and thenyou become very lonely.
I think that was how mychildhood was, because I didn't
(06:06):
really get that love, thatattention, all the nicest things
.
I never got that.
So it's made me become very onthe offence side of life.
So anytime something littlehappens it triggers a lot of me,
(06:29):
a lot of dioxide out of me.
So because I get to feel like,oh, I'm in the world over myself
, nobody's going to save me.
How am I going to get this done?
I have to make it happen.
I don't want people to see I'ma loser.
So you're always, you're alwayson the go to make sure that you
are step ahead of your enemiesor anybody that wants to put you
(06:51):
down.
Speaker 2 (06:52):
Yeah, that was a day I cried.
Speaker 1 (06:58):
Okay.
Speaker 2 (07:00):
It's probably the 20th time I've cried, but this
particular day I rememberbecause something happened, and
with one of my brothers, andthen my mom called me.
Speaker 1 (07:10):
Yeah.
Speaker 2 (07:10):
She said you're the only one we have.
You know, help out, do this, dothat.
And the first thing I said tomy mom was that, yeah, I
understand.
My biggest issue, mom, is I'mhere, thank God, to help.
Yeah, but if I need help, who'sgoing to help me?
Speaker 1 (07:33):
Yeah, that's the thing.
Speaker 2 (07:36):
And as soon as I left the phone I broke into tears
because I realized at that pointthat I'm the only person I have
, but it looks like everybodyelse has.
Speaker 1 (07:46):
Has you.
Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, that'sdeep.
That's deep because a lot oftimes society has made us so
much that you don't have to showyour weakness, you don't have
to go to anybody for help.
(08:06):
But trust me, I am in a spacewhere I have I'm very privileged
to have a lot of people, goodpeople.
If I talk about good people,I'm so blessed to have good
people around me that I can callwhen, not financially, but when
I'm emotionally down, I'm ableto open up, cry my heart out for
(08:27):
them to feel where I am,without any form of judgment.
So there, I'm secured, becauseyou being everything for your
family and you saying you don'thave anybody to fall on when you
have to should be a man thing.
(08:50):
Where we are brought up, men aresinging not to have milk, not
to have meltdown.
But it's okay if you have tobreak down in front of people.
It's okay if you have to cryfor people to know that, hey,
things are not all right withyou.
But men usually don't come outlike that.
But we women we do.
We usually break down, we talkto people, get just to let us
(09:16):
have this bedding off, nottotally, but at a point in time,
even talking to somebody thatyou trash so much about things
that are weighing you down in away gives you some sort of
upliftment, you know, even ifyou don't get a result there,
and then there's this weightthat lifts you, at least for you
(09:41):
to be able to open up tosomebody then butchling it up.
I keep saying that all the time.
I can never be that person,that when I'm going through
stuff so I want to go through itall by myself.
Yeah, I would always want totalk to people about things I go
through and I'm not shy to talkabout it.
You know why?
(10:01):
Because I feel and I'm not shywhen people laugh about my
downfalls I'm not because I'mnot perfect there's no straight
path to success.
So it would be good for them tolaugh at me now and then again
when I make a big double, like,yeah, you remember that girl?
(10:22):
I used to know her.
She used to be that girl thatwas so like seriously, at my
home.
She used to be a failure, butthen again, I didn't just stay
down there, I tried through, Imade my way through out to the
top.
So I think people shouldactually be able to express
(10:42):
themselves like the real percentof them, like not hiding stuff
behind themselves, like the faceof Instagram or like social
media, where people feeleverything you have, it will put
together, but in reality, youhave a lot of things weighing
down.
Speaker 2 (11:00):
Yeah well, when you are in the now, on the age of
social media, a lot of thingsare covered.
Speaker 1 (11:05):
Yeah.
Speaker 2 (11:06):
And everybody is concerned about how protecting
an image.
Speaker 1 (11:10):
You have to protect an image.
Speaker 2 (11:12):
The same pictures you put on the Instagram.
That's what you're protecting.
Speaker 1 (11:14):
Yes, in a home.
Yes, concerned about all thosethings, yeah.
Speaker 2 (11:18):
You know, but yeah sometimes it's necessary, you
know it's necessary to speak outand then let people know, but
at that time I just had to.
I just felt it yeah, becauseyou know this is happening, that
is happening, that is happening.
And they all come into Derek,yeah.
And then, like you're thinkingto yourself well, who am I going
to?
Yeah, we have God.
(11:39):
Well, yeah, that's a goodanswer.
Everybody else is going to.
No, they have God.
But you should know you shouldknow.
Speaker 1 (11:45):
This is what I have to tell you.
I am more.
We are all spiritual, but Iconnect more on a level whereby,
anytime I'm in a position tohelp somebody, I always thank
God, and I always thank God forbeing able to put me in that
situation to be able to help.
(12:06):
Yes, exactly.
So I don't glorify helpingpeople.
I see it to be me being aninstrument for God to use to
bless people.
Yeah.
Speaker 2 (12:15):
Yeah, yeah, that's the purpose of Abandoned is
anyway.
Speaker 1 (12:18):
Yes, yeah.
So that is why you're nevergoing to lack.
Yeah, because he's always goingto use you as a channel to
bless his people.
Yeah, yeah.
Speaker 2 (12:28):
You know, I think we have some conversations about
your time at school, earlystages.
Speaker 1 (12:37):
How I got into styling.
Yeah, okay, so, yeah.
So I've always been that kindof person that I would say I'm
really attracted to people'spersonal branding.
Back in the days it was how youlook, you look.
But now I think we've modifiedit by same personal branding.
(12:58):
As a brand, or as an individual,you should have an identity and
an identity.
I would always say that.
Let me say this Chris Brown hasan identity.
Every time he's, he tries to dowild styles because he's an
artist.
You get me.
(13:18):
So that is his identity as anartist.
So everybody relate to him asthat.
Imagine seeing Chris Browndressed, dressing up in like
what's it called Seriousshooting tie, with his what's it
called?
Like a tux, with his shoes andall that it would be like.
(13:40):
It will come to us as like asurprise.
But over the years we've seenhis style, his blonde hair, the
kind of wild, crazy hair he does.
So we relate to them more ashis identity because he's an
artist.
Okay, so let's say you're what,do you?
An entrepreneur and you'retrying to go seek a contract,
(14:04):
right?
I say this all the time.
You always address by how youlook, trust me.
And if you want to be addressed, I say I'm a bologna, you have
to start dressing like when,right.
And I think a week ago I had aclient who said she was going to
meet somebody for a contractand she wants to underdress.
(14:25):
So the person doesn't feelshe's coming in to radio him or
for something.
And I was like, no, you have todress like a million bucks.
So when you're bidding for acontract or an amount for him to
pay, he'll know that that isnot even that's peanut for you.
But here in Ghana, where wefound ourselves like, a lot of
(14:46):
people try to underdress.
I don't know if it's the factthat they don't see the value of
doing it or it's just thatyou're lazy about it.
Speaker 2 (14:57):
I don't know if you realize that here in Ghana yeah,
I guess, from what I'mgathering, then it's better to
overdress than underdress.
That's what you're saying.
Speaker 1 (15:04):
Not overdress.
You don't have to overdress,but just look presentable.
And when we talk about beinglooking presentable, you have to
look the path where you'regoing.
Okay, you have to look the pathto where you're going, For
instance, when you are invitedinto a meeting I say this in all
in respect to business, becausebusiness is always a place is
(15:27):
that you'd have to elevateyourself and prove a point in
every the circle you findyourself and you're being
invited into a business meetingand you just wear like a t-shirt
or something.
Derek, you have to be abillionaire to be wearing that
t-shirt, yeah, for real.
For real, because that meansyou're going in there, you're
(15:47):
not going to ask for anything.
But if you're going to ask forsomething and even in the dating
space, as women I would evensay that some women tries to you
can be a total tenor for a man,or a total tenor for a man Okay
.
So you have to be able to knowhow to balance it.
You have to look in a way thata man would be like oh, this
(16:10):
girl can be somebody I can takehome by.
In another way can be a freak.
There has to be a balance.
There has to be a balance ineverything that you do.
For instance, we have I'mtalking for myself ladies that
have very longer nails and thenyou have boobs spilling out and
(16:30):
all that.
As a lady, I think you shouldbe able to dress appropriately
depending on where you're going.
Even if you want to look sexy,you can look sexy, and you can
look sexy and appealing at thesame time.
They're looking trashy.
Speaker 2 (16:46):
Finally, you mentioned the nails.
Speaker 1 (16:48):
Yeah.
Speaker 2 (16:49):
There was a time my wife and I saw an image of this
lady who had nails about thatlong.
And then I showed it to her andshe was like how is she going
to clean the bum?
Yeah, they think it's like howis she going to use her phone?
Speaker 1 (17:03):
Yeah, you will need a different type of fingers to be
able to do all of that, but hey, you know, it's nice, it's nice
.
No, that is not.
That is not being a lady, andyou have to.
As I was saying, you have to beable to balance everything that
you do Life, you have to bevery intentional about it and
(17:26):
when it comes to physicalappearance, like how to put your
looks together, you always haveto calculate the kind of
audience you're meeting everytime you have to meet somebody.
I remember I was telling youearlier today that, dressing up
like this, it took me like fiveor different five to six looks
(17:46):
for me to be able to say hereOkay, with this basic shirt and
sneakers, I have, it wouldn'ttake me that long?
Yes, because I needed to fitinto your audience, because you
said it was a podcast.
So I had to dress.
You were not expecting me to beon heels, have like a dress up
on.
I wanted it to look more casualand fun.
(18:06):
So then I had to dress to fitinto the space.
I didn't do much, I didn't do.
It's just a T-shirt on there,but I had to calculate the look
and vision, how it's going tocome out, before I get it done.
Speaker 2 (18:20):
So there's always a thought process.
Speaker 1 (18:21):
Yes.
So, every look, I would sayanytime that I have to step out,
even if I'm going to the salon,I think through what I have to
wear, what is appropriate forthe salon, Wow, I need a
different kind of brain.
Speaker 2 (18:36):
Maybe, because you're a man, because I can show up in
church like this.
I can show up in a familymeeting like this.
I can show up at the officelike this.
Speaker 1 (18:46):
Depending on the kind of office you go to, depending
on the kind of office If you'regoing into bid for a contract.
Speaker 2 (18:53):
Can't go looking shabby.
Speaker 1 (18:54):
You can't.
You have to look like the moneyyou are about.
No, I think you even have tolook twice of whatever you're
going to look for.
So let's say the way you smell.
The way you smell Veryimportant, yeah.
So all those things play a verymajor role in how you are being
(19:16):
perceived for the first time.
Speaker 2 (19:18):
That's no branding Right.
You want to brand Derek.
Speaker 1 (19:23):
Yeah.
Speaker 2 (19:24):
What would be the process and the decision making
at the end, and which partswould I play into your imagined
image?
Speaker 1 (19:35):
So usually people don't like to step out from
their comfort zone.
People would always want tostep out.
When they've outgrown wherethey are and they feel the
circle that they are fallinginto they don't meet or they
don't meet that standard.
That is when they startrealizing they have to work on
(19:55):
themselves.
I have a lot of clients likethat.
Usually when I have a packagethat I sell on for people and
some people, when you sell itout for them, they don't even
see the essence.
So now I've stopped selling it,I've stopped talking about it,
because I always want people tohit the rock.
When they hit the rock, theycan back being ready.
(20:17):
So imagine coming to you hey,Derek, I want to brand you, I
want you to start looking good,I want you to start looking
sharp and all that.
I would come and maybe talk toyou about 45 minutes or 30
minutes or 20 minutes maximum orsomething.
But I kid you not, you didn'tget any.
You were in a mood by any.
It's more like marketing.
But when you start associatingyourself with the big boys, you
(20:41):
start going into their midst.
You see how they roll, how theyput their things together.
Psychologically you're affected.
So in the midst, in their midst.
You would want to fit in.
So that is when you come backto the drawing board to see how
can I be?
How can I be, how can I getinto the group where people were
(21:04):
identifying me as part of thegroup?
So imagine going into a settingwhereby you see like five men
or five women setting up.
You would always know the alphaof the group.
But how they look, how theytalk and the way people approach
them, I don't know if you getwhat I'm saying.
(21:26):
No, no.
Speaker 2 (21:26):
I get it.
I'm listening very attentively,I get it completely and I get
what you're saying.
It is the association thatdetermines how you're going to
dress.
Speaker 1 (21:39):
I got a male client, a man who has really risen up
there like that.
So he came.
It was a project we had on sothey were taking him through the
etiquette stuff Corporate guy,very big man, golden stuff, like
that.
He's into the mind firm.
But he's realized where he'sfalling into now.
(22:00):
He's not fit for that.
So we had to go through thewhole process with him Personal
grooming, how to take care ofhimself, and it's not a bad
thing A lot of people don't know.
Some people focus more on justthe job and then forget the
personal brand.
Like you know Tony or Nulemirior something.
(22:23):
The UBA guy?
No, you don't know him.
That man is good with branding.
You should check him out.
Like he's always in the redsuit and the red tie in a suit
but look, his looks are alwaysahead Because he has a whole
team that takes care of hispersonal branding.
(22:43):
You should hook him up.
Speaker 2 (22:44):
You should look at him on Instagram.
Speaker 1 (22:46):
The owner of UBA Bank .
You know UBA, the Nigerian Bank.
Yes, he has a whole team thatflies with him.
He's always in just black shirtand black polo shirt.
He had even worse sneakers,that much.
But you can see the guy is hislooks are thoroughly well put
together.
(23:07):
So that is a man that he wouldgo into the midst of people and
there's so much respect, hecommands so much confidence, the
way he even walks would be ableto tell you that this man has a
good personal branding going onthere.
You know, most of the time yousee CEOs and entrepreneurs and
(23:27):
you go like, oh really, is thisreally the brain behind the
brand?
Your brand should match thepersonality.
I say that all the time Becausepeople will not start taking
you serious.
A lot of people would.
I would say.
People usually try to resonatewith yourself than your brand.
When you have proper brandinggoing on, oh, you don't, you
(23:51):
don't, you don't care to whatI'm saying.
Speaker 2 (23:52):
No, no, no, no, I do, I do, I'm taking my turn.
Speaker 1 (23:56):
Imagine people see the brand behind Connected mind.
The guy has a great personality.
The guy has a.
This guy.
I will talk about futuristicKwame.
I used to work with Kwame at MX.
People really didn't see my too, but he started associating
himself with the Vuzi guy.
The Vuzi guy, the South Africanguy.
(24:18):
The guy is good with personalbranding and now Kwame is able
to command so much Was a crowd.
He ain't gonna.
I see, yes.
So I think personal branding issomething that we have to.
Every individual has to work onit, have an identity.
If you are a white shirt guy,make sure you you you nail the
(24:38):
hell out of the white teeth youwear all the time.
So anybody that sees you in awhite is maybe the little asses
you're going to have on is goingto make the look come out
really, really great.
You get what I'm saying, but Isay that today you see people in
different stuff, differentstuff and, yeah, all over they.
(24:59):
They try hard to have anidentity.
Somebody like Thames themusician we don't really know
her identity, I don't reallyknow her brand name because
she's all over, she's all over,and that is something that, with
personal branding, you shouldbe able to come out with
(25:20):
something.
Speaker 2 (25:21):
You identify Exactly what's that.
Speaker 1 (25:24):
Somebody has a hat they wear as their brand
identity wherever they find them.
So, yes, anybody that sees youknows that you have to come up
with a hat.
This is very interesting.
Yep, very interesting.
I never thought about it likethat.
Speaker 2 (25:42):
It's very interesting .
I may have to work on my brand.
You will all learn it.
No, no, your prices are cool.
Speaker 1 (25:48):
Prices are cool depending on how you put them
together.
I say that all the time.
So it's not about doing themost, but being intentional
about what you do.
That is what you have to put inmind.
So you can choose to even wear,like, a Louis Vuitton shirt,
which doesn't even make sense,but it will still not look.
Fly on you, but it depends onhow you are able to put that
(26:10):
look together to suit yourpersonal brand.
Speaker 2 (26:15):
Personally, I don't like clothes that have brands in
them.
Speaker 1 (26:19):
I think it's cliche now.
Speaker 2 (26:21):
Yes, cliche now, I don't like that.
Especially this part of theworld, you can never really know
whether it's original.
Speaker 1 (26:28):
So I don't really like them.
Speaker 2 (26:31):
I watch shoes, jeans and t-shirts.
I don't really.
Speaker 1 (26:36):
You know, the rich people, the wealthy people,
usually do street brands.
They do a lot of street brandsbecause clothes are things that
we are going to use more often.
So maybe the shoes andaccessories and the bags would
make a difference, because whenyou have a lot you'll be able to
change, but with clothes theseare things that we will be
wearing every day.
So I think those things shouldbe like basic styles that we
(26:59):
should get, not really investmuch in it, but be able to get
qualities that make so muchsense here.
Speaker 2 (27:10):
You were speaking about how you got yourself into
personal brand Personal stylingyes.
And then, though, something yousaid when we were speaking
about you sitting at the frontrolling class, which I thought
was very nice.
Speaker 1 (27:27):
So usually back in school I would go to canton
manteau to get clothes becauseI'd always wanted to be that
girl that I look all fly, allfly in a nice way.
Somebody would turn and look atyou and be like, oh nice, this
is nice, I really like this.
Not in a seductive way, don'tget me wrong, but in a very, I
(27:50):
think, respectful way.
Respectful way, yes, that's theword.
So back in school I wouldalways be the last to come into
the classroom, but always sit infront.
I walk in right before thelecture comes in, sit right in
front and immediately he's done,I stand and I walk out of the
class.
So eventually people startednoticing me and people would
(28:13):
approach oh hey, you're the girl, can I be your friend?
I like who you're wearing.
Where did you get that from?
So that was how I made friendsthrough what I was wearing in
school.
Not too much, I wasn't evendoing too much because I was
always in jeans and stuff aswell, but the fact that I was
able to put them together andfor it to look very attractive
(28:36):
on me for people to complimentthat.
I think that was how I was ableto get acquainted with people
like my classmates and stufflike that, and even people out
on my Seniors and stuff.
Yes, my seniors, my seniorslike that.
So after school, after myservice, I had this friend from
(28:57):
school that had just traveled toNigeria.
I got back that morning and shewas a designer.
She was a designer.
We intended going to design inschool, but I was like I'm not
the kind of person that I liketo sit at one place for long, so
I like to move, I always wantto move.
So she went into school todesign and after that she was.
(29:22):
Then she invited me and saidone morning where she was
shooting with Becca, and thatmorning she invited me over to
take her on set because she madethe outfit as well.
So I got on set and Becca had astylist.
Funny enough, all the All whatthe stylist was doing, I was so
(29:43):
itchy to get it done so, out ofnowhere, my friend just told
Becca that oh, she's a stylist,my friend is a stylist.
The next morning I had a callfrom my friend that Becca said
she was having an event thatevening and she wanted me to
style her.
And that's how I've been astylist for this long.
Speaker 2 (30:03):
Wow, that's beautiful .
Speaker 1 (30:05):
Yeah, that was how I ended up, because I say this all
the time, so suppose I didn'tfollow my friend that day.
Where would my destiny be now?
Because I just listened to thevoice.
I was like a girl just out ofschool.
I finished my service, I washome and largely I didn't have
anything to do, so I justfollowed her on set for her to
(30:27):
wear the clothes for the lady aswell.
So she called me and she waslike she wanted to.
She wanted me to style her fora concert that was in December.
That was December 2015.
Yes, 2015,.
Yes, and I style her and it hasbeen from that day.
Speaker 2 (30:50):
Yeah, yeah, but one of the things I wanted to know
was you know what's the thoughtprocess though?
You see, when you see a person,what's the thought process?
Is it just you pick the clothesand then that's you like it's
gonna fit that person, it'sgonna fit that person?
Or you actually picture a typeof outfit for a person and then
(31:13):
you just go for it, or you haveoptions.
Speaker 1 (31:16):
Okay, so this is it, I think, with styling first of
all, before I choose an outfitor I style anybody, I always ask
people of what they do.
Based on what you do, wedetermine the kind of outfit
that will go with you.
And in terms of, like, yourbody type, your complexion, the
(31:41):
event you're attending, thatalso play a measure.
With the color palette, things,colors that look good on you,
all those things play a measurebefore I would even come up with
an outfit.
So I just don't pick.
Maybe you're going out and youdon't have to like in terms of
ladies, you don't have to wearsomething short where, if you
(32:04):
said, you would feeluncomfortable.
And many are times you people,you see people at events that
you'll be like, oh, did shereally come out from the house?
Because they didn't reallythink properly about the kind of
people they were meeting, thekind of crowd they were coming
into.
So, as a stylist, what I do isI help you put all those things
(32:24):
in place before you even come upto put an outfit on for you to
look good.
Speaker 2 (32:31):
Yes, I see yes, so you do that work.
Speaker 1 (32:35):
Yes, I do that work.
I plan all the looks.
I create mood boards.
I don't just we create moodboards, I send you mood boards
of the looks we are trying toperceive the shoes that will go
with the looks, the hair thatwill go, the kind of makeup that
will go with the looks, theaccessories that will go with it
, the bags that will go with thelooks, In fact.
So a whole lot of process goesinto it.
(32:57):
So when you're choosing anoutfit, you just don't choose
because it's an outfit, it'snice.
I've gotten into a boutique,I've seen this cool outfit and I
know it's going to work on meand I'm just buying it to wear
to an event.
Nope.
Speaker 2 (33:10):
That's what I do most of the time.
You just pick here like no, nothat's nice.
Speaker 1 (33:14):
No, no, no, no Okay.
Speaker 2 (33:16):
Yes, there's a process to it.
Speaker 1 (33:18):
Yeah, yeah, yeah, no, I just and a lot of people
think styling is just forcelebrities.
But I don't think that's it,because anybody that is trying
to leave a Mac or trying tobuild a brand should have a
personal stylist.
Yes, but here it's been so hardhere, to be honest with you,
(33:41):
because when I started I wasgetting a lot of celebrity jobs
like most of the clientele baysI had were all celebrities.
But over the years I've evolved.
I realized that people reallyneed help.
Celebrities are all we see, buton a daily basis, a lot of
people need help.
So I started with the personalstyling, where I try to look
(34:05):
into people's personal lives tobe able to come up with wardrobe
capsules for them, things thatwill suit their personality and
their brand.
So if they are going now, theyhave varieties of stuff to wear
that would make them feelcomfortable in it as well.
So most people, like women,most people always end up
(34:27):
wearing loose stuff all the time.
Have you realized?
You always wear like a shirt.
The normal thing is a whiteshirt for ladies, the men to
white shirt, that's it.
They don't really add anythingto it and they just wear like
that.
Speaker 2 (34:42):
That's true, I'm learning.
I just didn't think this wholething was that deep.
It's deep.
I just thought, look, if I'mgoing to church and I need to
see you go, like four or fiveseats pick one of them, wear it.
This is where, if I'm going,for a wedding get one.
(35:02):
I didn't really think I have tosit down for you to make a plan
about my life and the thingsI'm going to wear.
Speaker 1 (35:09):
If you're able to plan about what you put in your
body, why not?
Don't you want to?
Yes, If you have to plan onthings you like.
I remember when we were havingbreakfast you said you don't
take a meat, so why can't youplan what you look like for
people to see?
Speaker 2 (35:23):
I guess I do, I guess I should, you should.
Speaker 1 (35:27):
I think those are things that we should have.
You should have wardrobestaples, things that people
would find in your wardrobe.
Those things are like a go-tostuff that every day you can use
.
But then again, a lot of peopledon't prioritize that.
A lot of people have clothes intheir closet, but anytime they
(35:48):
have to go out they have to shop.
Yes, and to tell you the truth,the last time I don't even shop
.
I hardly shop, because I makethe most out of the things I buy
, things I'm very intentionalabout it.
I'm able to buy things that I'mable to restyle, so that I
don't have to be buying newclothes all the time.
(36:09):
And then, when it even comes tocolors of shoes, of bags I buy,
I always think about colors.
Yes, yes, you have to thinkabout things that you can be
using in diverse ways thanhaving only an outfit or a shoe
or a bag that you're able to useonce a year.
Speaker 2 (36:31):
I love it, I love it, I love it, I love it, I love it
.
I'm empowered.
That's it.
Speaker 1 (36:38):
I love it.
So I say this all the time.
I think my confidence level hasreally gotten to the space
where I don't think anybody canbreak me, because I tell you
what.
Tell me.
Speaker 2 (36:54):
So even starting to wear rings was something I had
to get used to, and thenstarting to wear glasses.
Now how are people going tolook at it?
People are going to think I'mbeing weird, I'm trying to be
(37:17):
extra.
I used to like to keep itsimple, but now I'm getting
there.
Now I'm adding some necklacesand things like that, and people
still see me and they're likeoh right, you got a ring there
and then a ring there.
And then we're like, okay, I'mjust trying, yeah, yeah.
Speaker 1 (37:38):
A lot of people find it so hard coming out from their
comfort zone.
That's the thing what they'velearned all their lives.
I think humans are naturallyunder man to change.
For me telling a client to wearsomething short above her knee,
or wearing a crop top I wearcrop top a lot because I like to
sometimes define, not crop topin a very seductive way but just
(38:01):
show a little bit of skin.
As a woman, you always don'thave to be all covered,
depending on where you're going.
Sometimes you have to show ifit's a weekend show, some back
show, some.
You know what I'm saying.
So clients like oh, where doesit say should be like with which
stomach?
That's the first thing theywill ask me.
I'm like you're perfect, buttell me, doesn't have to be
(38:23):
totally flat for you beforeyou'll be able to wear that.
If you do that, you'll be stuckwith boring stuff all the time
You'll be stuck with.
But you have to be able tolengthen it Brings some
excitement, excitement, exactly,exactly.
If you're going out with yourfriends, your girlfriend, you
(38:44):
want to look very youthful, andstuff like that, you should add
some sort of you know someelement that will make you look
more sexy.
Yeah.
Speaker 2 (38:55):
Well then, I guess there's a fine line between
being sexy and being seductive.
Then, yes, you see a lot of theladies showing a lot of
cleavage.
Speaker 1 (39:05):
Okay.
So with the cleavage thing, youcan show a little as a lady.
Actually let me rephrase it asa lady you can show cleavage,
but not too much.
The thing is you have to keepthe mind wondering what is there
?
It's like opening up of a cakeor opening food up.
You don't open it too much, youjust open for people to smell
(39:25):
the aroma.
You close it back, so peoplewould be curious to know what's
been in there.
That's the thing.
But the thing is, when youspill everything out and they
are saying so what are theygoing to be curious about to see
again?
Speaker 2 (39:38):
Nothing.
Some of the men too are sayingthat if you're showing it too
much, then you're causingtrouble for other men.
How are you going to?
And it's making other men wantto chase after the women and
things like that.
So they want it all closed.
Speaker 1 (39:58):
No, all closed.
In a way that you don't get meLike if I'm not saying you
should make everything short Ina way you tease a bit, is that
it doesn't have to be allcovered, because myself I've
been guilty for some time now,because anytime I go out with my
husband, okay, I show more ofcurves than skin.
(40:20):
I feel that's what I've beendoing.
But now I have to beintentional about there should
be a balance where I showed moreof a little bit of the cleavage
and stuff like that for it tobe about that.
Speaker 2 (40:31):
When you're with your husband.
Speaker 1 (40:32):
Just when I'm with my husband.
That is not that I'm going outlike telling people, yes, it's
not that I'm going out ortelling people, okay, I need a
man, or like I need a man tocall me.
But then again you're with aman and you'll be like, damn,
she's sexy, she's with her man.
Yeah, you get what I'm saying,so that your man doesn't look at
(40:52):
other sexy girls.
What else?
You look boring beside him.
Speaker 2 (40:57):
Yeah, you know what.
Speaker 1 (40:59):
That's the truth.
You know sometimes.
Speaker 2 (41:00):
That's the truth.
Yeah, that's the truth.
That's the truth, yeah.
Speaker 1 (41:06):
You have to look like that.
You have to.
You can be the good girl, butyou have to be there.
Good girl bad girl, bad girl aswell.
There should be a balance.
He can't be.
Speaker 2 (41:15):
Is there a time that a woman would dress, having in
mind that the men are going tolook at this?
Speaker 1 (41:22):
Yeah, depending on the type of woman the woman that
you're talking about we have alot of women Because as part of
the dressing, the styling, youknow it's there.
Speaker 2 (41:31):
is there a conscious effort to, to review certain
things, to gain attention fromthe opposite?
Speaker 1 (41:38):
sex?
Absolutely, okay, absolutely,depending on the kind of woman
that you're talking about.
If a woman is taken, or if awoman really wants a man,
obviously she's going to do thatfor attention.
But a woman who is classy andelegant, I think we show you
something, but we're not showyou much.
(42:00):
We know we don't show you much.
But the people we have, thepeople that are in town that
they are like hey, I'm here,call me, this is what I'm here
for.
And then we have the other typeof women that I'm classy, I'm
sexy, but I'm not looking for aman.
How about that?
Speaker 2 (42:19):
Yeah, that's, that's also the one.
See me personally.
I didn't choose my wife becauseshe was showing me things.
I chose her because that's justwho I liked.
Speaker 1 (42:32):
Obviously, no man chooses any man because of that.
When I talk about choosing,it's not for kids.
You're an adult, so you shouldknow what I'm talking about.
So yeah, of course, like goingout to the club dressing, most
people come to the club forhookups and being an SWE.
So obviously when you'reselling something, you have to
display it well for people tosee it.
(42:52):
So if you're selling, you haveto display it properly.
But somebody who comes to theclub who just want to have fun,
I don't think will overlydisplay much because she's just
there for a good time.
She's there not to attract men.
I've been in the club whereI've seen women that have
(43:13):
dressed like really nice, sexy,but not too much of an attention
, but they are just there tohave fun.
Those kind of women aredifferent from the people that
they're selling.
You should know.
You should know.
Speaker 2 (43:34):
Well, we're selling, but yeah, how do you bring
somebody to the realization thatthey have to start being
confident about the new outfitor the new brand that you've
given them?
Speaker 1 (43:52):
Okay, yeah, I say this all the time depending on
what you face and the scope youfind yourself, you try to adjust
yourself.
That's what I just said.
When you start meeting CEOs,you start sitting in boardrooms
with top CEOs and you see theway they even dress, the way
they smell the watch they have,the kind of things they wear,
(44:16):
your mind will start positioningthat, hey, you have to blend in
.
Speaker 2 (44:20):
So you get the client to do it themselves, so you
don't have any.
No, I do that.
Speaker 1 (44:25):
The fact is, when I come to you telling you I want
to do the dd-d-d-d-d-d, and thatat that time you'll be like
what is this One of theinstances this girl talking
about?
When you go out in the worldand you start seeing people that
you realize that you are notmatching up to the standard,
then you come back to me.
That is when I'll help you andwith that they are easy for
change.
But when you go in there tryingto talk to them, to change the
(44:48):
scope of how they pray, theyfeel very undermined.
They don't even see the essenceof it being that way.
It's just like what's it called?
That was the best example thatI can cite right now.
When people don't take good careof their health and when their
health start deteriorating allof a sudden, when you tell them
(45:10):
100 drugs to make them feel good, they will buy without even
complaining.
Oh yeah, so people have aproblem you can solve.
You can give them a solution.
If they don't realize they havea problem, trust me, every
solution you get give them isnot going to work for them.
Speaker 2 (45:25):
Yeah, that's true, I mean there are.
There are some patients thatyou know they have to have a
first episode of stroke beforethey start taking their yes,
hypertension, exactly regularlyyou know, especially some of us
they just don't like taking themtaking them.
Speaker 1 (45:41):
You know, I understand people have to hit
that that, yes, when they hitthe rock, like people telling
you oh, um, my husband doesn'tlook coming off in, now I want
to get my groove back on,they've realized, maybe they've
noticed the man Is not givingthem the attention they want.
So now they want to feel sexyagain.
That is when they will comeback to you, hmm, but if they
(46:01):
are okay, they wouldn't see anydifference in doing all that
bedroom branding as well.
No, no bedroom brand.
As a woman, everything that'stalks about confidence in a
woman is what I Would reallywant to.
That is what I said.
Anything that would bring awoman's confidence back, I'm up
for it.
People that go to postpartumdepression a lot of women go
(46:23):
through that.
The body changes afterchildbirth.
A lot of women are not able todeal with it and, and Loki,
people don't talk about it.
And then you realize that theystart wearing loose doubts all
the time and then you hear themtalking about oh, when I was
there before I had kids, I had agreat buddy, I had this, I had
great buddy.
But what changed Childbirth?
(46:45):
But I feel childbirth shouldn'trestrict you from being yourself
.
A lot of women fall under thatumbrella of because I have kids,
my body has changed and I can'tlook like the way I used to
look.
But I feel every woman, aftersome time you have to get your
body in shape, you have to getyour groove back on because,
(47:05):
mind you me, the men who tellyou oh, you're okay, you're that
, you that, but they didn't meetyou like that.
They didn't meet you like that.
That's, that wasn't what theymarried to.
They married Even thoughchanges are prone to happen.
But you have to make aconscious effort to make sure
that, even even if it's not forthe man, for you yourself as a
(47:26):
woman.
You have to be so confident inyourself, in your body, and how
you even dress should be moreappealing for yourself.
So I say this all the times lookat yourself a Five years of you
from now and ask if you'll beable to date yourself.
Okay, there should be aconstant change in in in you the
(47:48):
more you go.
There should be constant changein how you put yourself
together and stuff like that badIf you.
If you look at people like fiveyears ago and five years from
now.
A lot of women stop doing allof that After they get married.
I don't know why they stop,they just stop.
But before marriage, don't bedressing, doing the right things
(48:11):
, but right after marriage isstop everything.
Forgetting marriage is a longtime thing.
Speaker 2 (48:16):
They were selling.
Now it's been bought.
Speaker 1 (48:18):
Even, even, even if it has been bought, they should
always be maintenance.
Maintenance is key because youalways have to maintain what
you've bought or else is notgoing to, it's not going to look
fresh, yeah, so you always haveto maintain it.
They should always bemaintenance as well.
Speaker 2 (48:47):
I'm definitely for married women and men, yes,
taking care of themselves yes athome because I I realized that
I was losing hair here.
Okay.
So Actually, I thought, losingmy hair one of about 19 years,
wow.
So when I got married, yes, itwent like it went like that.
(49:08):
Oh, okay, the kids came in, wow.
So I want to take it.
And I got it done.
What did you do?
I did a hair transplant.
Speaker 1 (49:14):
So I?
Is it the laser?
Speaker 2 (49:18):
no Proposed hair transplant where they take it
from the back of my hair andthen put it here.
So I got that done.
Speaker 1 (49:24):
Yeah, because I remember the first time I met
you, wasn't that?
I did it about two years ago.
Oh yeah, cuz I met you.
It was, it wasn't this so wasit that the hair wasn't growing
or what it just went?
Wow, was it the weather inLondon money precious, love
money precious money precious.
(49:45):
Does it count?
It does it?
Yeah, I want money, and it's myfamily as well.
My daddy, yeah, of course.
If isn't, I think it's a hairduty stuff.
Speaker 2 (49:52):
I'm still gonna go back and get a crown down
because they have to do in twoparts.
Speaker 1 (49:56):
Wow, but it's all part of my that you've been
asking, man, you as a man,you've been able to do that.
I would say I really applaudyou for that, because a lot of
people would have just been like, oh, what is it like?
I'm a man.
If I have the money, what elsedo I have to keep away?
And that is what happens here alot.
I say that all the time.
Like men here, aside their carsand their houses, they have
(50:19):
nothing to prove.
So the first thing that they,they know not for you, yo, true
man, the first thing that I wantyou to see when they meet you
up with, when they meet up withyou, is the car.
And then they invite you Totheir house to see and that's
safe.
They feel if they show you thistwo things, then that's it.
But I feel the personaldevelopment is something that
women should be attracted to inmen.
(50:40):
That here, ah, anything goesthey want a man who has the, the
, the, the cousin, the musical,the cousin, the house.
That will not give them any.
Yeah, but for rather fall forthat than a man on a mission,
yeah, yeah.
Speaker 2 (50:55):
I understand.
Yeah, so I think it helped me alot.
Yeah, who stopped my confidence?
And yeah, I remember when mywife she was about to deliver.
Hmm when a conversation and shesaid she started saying some
things and I pressed record.
She goes make sure when Ideliver you're gonna push me to
(51:19):
lose the weight.
Speaker 1 (51:20):
Okay.
Speaker 2 (51:21):
And I said how do you want me to do it?
And she said say nasty thingsto me To get her to exercise,
okay.
And I did that, you did thatand she's done, amazing, amazing
, wow.
Speaker 1 (51:35):
She's done, amazing, wow.
Speaker 2 (51:36):
So it's good we work on ourselves.
Speaker 1 (51:38):
Yes.
Speaker 2 (51:38):
We shouldn't just give up just because we found
espoused and things like that.
So the personal aspect of ourlives need to carry on.
Speaker 1 (51:45):
Exactly, yeah, exactly.
I think it's a whole lot of fun.
And then again, I don't blamepeople as much in the country,
because if you have a lot offinancial burdens on you, you
know even be able to take goodcare of yourself, trust you me.
But then again we can't faultthat all the time.
You have to be intentionalabout your life and you don't
(52:07):
have to look like your problem,that's it, whoa.
You have to look like yourproblem.
You have to have command overyour problem, because the
problem met you.
It didn't meet the problem, soyou were there before the
problem.
So definitely the problemshould outshine you the
individual.
Yeah, you know, yeah, that's sodeep.
Yes, yeah, life is all aboutbeing intentional about yourself
(52:30):
all the time.
If you're not, it's just goingto swallow you, because the
problem will never end.
Speaker 2 (52:35):
It never goes away.
It never goes away, it nevergoes away Kiddy.
Speaker 1 (52:42):
He said, well, allow me make her enjoy life, problem,
no, go finish her.
That's it, it's true.
When I heard that lyrics I waslike wow, it's true, it's never
going to end.
So you have to live your lifeto the fullest by dressing all
the time, looking good all thetime, feeling good, the feeling
you have when you are well puttogether.
I don't know for men, but forwomen for me.
Speaker 2 (53:04):
I think I've already told you when I did my hair.
You know, when you first do thehair, you get scabs a lot.
It looks very bad.
Wow, I was confident as fuck.
I was like you're taking thisout and I said yeah, because I
know the destination.
Speaker 1 (53:24):
What happened?
What happened?
So the hair?
So does it grow?
Do you cut it?
They shave everything off.
So what did you do?
Did you cut it off?
No, do you cut it off or itdoesn't grow, and that's how it
is this?
Speaker 2 (53:37):
No, it grows.
This is my actual hair.
It grows.
I just put duerag on it.
But on this show, right, welike to ask a few questions, and
the first question ismotivation or discipline?
Speaker 1 (53:55):
It has to be discipline.
For me, I think discipline getsa job.
Then Discipline is when, evenwhen you're tired, you have to
do it Together.
Results you have to do it.
Discipline is key to me.
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
Speaker 2 (54:14):
Yeah, I agree.
Speaker 1 (54:16):
If you're not disciplined, trust me, like
motivation can motivate you, butif you, it's not going to make
you do the work as early aspossible, because you're going
to work on your own time.
But discipline is being havingbreakfast at eight in the
morning and making sure you havebreakfast at eight in the
morning to get something done.
But motivation you're going tohave breakfast, you can choose
(54:38):
to have it at 11.
And that's like three hoursbehind you.
And don't forget time is money,time is everything.
The more your time is beingtaken off, your lifespan is also
being taken away from you.
Speaker 2 (54:51):
Fantastic, yeah.
And then the other one is thebest personal development book
that you've ever.
Speaker 1 (55:00):
Maybe two.
Okay, I think there's a book Idon't really remember the author
I think I had I don't remember,but a friend gifted to me and
I'm not really good at readingbooks.
To be honest with you, I'm notreally a book person.
Speaker 2 (55:16):
Maybe you should do audio books.
Speaker 1 (55:17):
Yes, I love audio books.
Yeah, audio books.
Yes, driving, listening topeople podcast I love that a lot
about sitting up to read books.
Trust me, the next five minutesI'm sleeping.
I'm not going to lie about it,but that's me.
That has always been me.
Speaker 2 (55:35):
Yeah, that has always been me.
Yeah and Bivé, what's your?
What's the best advice you everhad?
Speaker 1 (55:44):
Keep doing what you're doing and the right
people will fish you out.
That has been my ever Keepdoing what you're doing.
And the right people will fishyou out.
Yeah, nice.
That's nice, it all started whenI, when I started styling here
(56:04):
in Ghana, I was so depressed.
There are a lot of times that Ihad wanted to even stop this
and go back to corporate andit's for real.
So there was this lady, um,alessia Andreina, out.
She doesn't even know theimpact she has had on me.
Um, since that time, I thinkit's been.
If my son is five, I think I'mgoing to be five.
(56:25):
Um, I think the past four years, I think that's what has really
helped me.
So I got really depressedbecause there were a lot of
competitors in the market thenand she, she people were like
you don't do a lot ofaccessories compared to like the
other stylists we have, cause Iwas thinking my, my, my way of
(56:48):
styling people is more relatablethan editorial.
I don't know if you get whatI'm saying, because we're in
styling.
We have a lot of sections.
We have the editorial looks andthen we have the personal,
personal styling.
I think my forte is more intopersonal styling.
How people look on a daily basematters to me than on the red
(57:10):
carpet.
Right, that we matter redcarpet, I don't really.
It's an occasional stuff, ormaybe editorials, but I really
want people to have thisconfidence in their everyday
life.
That is for me.
I think that was my market.
So I complained to her.
I was like Sandra, like I feelI'm not doing well in what I was
(57:31):
doing, like I was so depressedand she was like we will need
Keep doing what you're doing andthe right people will fish you
out.
Four years down the lane, Ireally want to turn care for
using that to talk to me,because I had made up my mind
that I was going to go back intocorporate.
(57:53):
But here I am now, so happy I'mserving a lot of people, having
a lot of testimonies fromclients, helping them begin
their confidence and all that.
It's very much of a ministryfor me, because had it not been
that I had left, I had left thisjourney, what would have been
(58:16):
the story by now?
So I have been doing what Iknow how to do best and through
that, by the grace of God, I'vebeen able to attract the right
crowd, the right people.
Speaker 2 (58:27):
They are fishing you.
Yes, that's amazing.
That's amazing to hear.
Speaker 1 (58:30):
Yes.
Speaker 2 (58:32):
But, wow, thank you so much.
I think it's been an awesomeconversation and then I hope
that our listeners and ourviewers are going to learn how
to do their personal brandingand things like that, and those
that need you will contact you.
But I've learned a lot.
I've learned a lot.
Speaker 1 (58:52):
And thanks for having me.
Speaker 2 (58:53):
You're absolutely welcome.
Thank you for your time today.
Honestly, I appreciate it.
All right connected minds.
We'll speak to you guys anothertime.
First impressions always count and it's always
leaves people thinking who youreally are as a lady.
I think you should be able todress appropriately depending on
where you're going.
Even if you want to look sexy,you can look sexy and appealing
at the same time.
Then looking trashy, you'realways dressed by how you look.
(00:22):
Trust me, I think people shouldactually be able to express
themselves.
If you want to be addressed asa bologna, you have to start
dressing like when Peopleusually try to resonate with
yourself than your brand.
Whatever I want to achieve inlife, if I don't get up and do
(00:44):
it myself, nobody's going tosave me.
So that's me.
Speaker 2 (00:55):
And thank you so much .
Ladies and gentlemen, my nameis Derek A and today you're
tuned in once again to theConnected Minds podcast, where
one good conversation, of course, can change a million lives.
You know, everyone needs tohave an identity.
So today, the conversationwe're going to have it's around
(01:17):
brand identity, because we havea specialist in the house.
Her name is Bubonay.
Everyone knows her as Bivé.
Now she's worked with a lot ofcelebrities, a lot of brands, a
lot of CEOs and I'm sure I'mgoing to be one of her customers
very soon and I believe today,if you stick around, you're
(01:38):
going to understand why youshould appear good the first day
the world come here.
I'm glad you came.
I'm glad you're with us today.
Speaker 1 (01:48):
I'm excited, let's go .
Speaker 2 (01:52):
So we're meeting London.
You can't remember yeah.
Speaker 1 (01:55):
I do.
Speaker 2 (01:55):
We're meeting London.
We're meeting Barking.
Samuel was around.
There's quite a few peoplearound and you remember what I
was wearing.
Speaker 1 (02:05):
I do, yeah, I do.
Speaker 2 (02:07):
That's interesting.
Speaker 1 (02:08):
Yes, and I don't even remember the older people that
we met that day.
Honestly, like I said,impressions first impressions
always count, and it's alwaysleaves people thinking who you
really are.
So I bid everyone to that,irrespective of where you are in
(02:32):
life, always make sure that,wherever you go, you leave a mac
Before you even start talking.
Let people wonder who theperson?
Who is this?
Who is this person?
Like your appearance should beable to attract people enough to
make people want to be friendswith you in a very positive way.
(02:55):
Yes, so my ideal way of livingis my life is always like a
runway, so you have to live yourlife as a runway.
So every day has to bememorable, even if it's a
t-shirt you're wearing.
Make it standard.
Yeah, Interesting.
Speaker 2 (03:17):
You know I like t-shirts a lot.
And white over the years, whitehas become my favorite color.
Oh wow, it's actually my wifethat said I think white is your
favorite color.
I didn't think so, but Irealized I wear white a lot,
like almost everything.
Speaker 1 (03:33):
I want white, it's white to always leave you
responsible, because you arealways careful when you're out
there.
Imagine you being in black allthe time.
You can splash stubs on yourshirt and not even think about
it, but when you have white on,you're always careful about what
you think and when I wasgrowing up, I used to be clumsy
(03:54):
as well, really.
Speaker 2 (03:55):
So, yeah, whenever I eat, I spill a bit, I spill a
bit, and my son is doing thatnow.
You know what are you doing?
I know where he got it from hegot it from you.
So transitioning to white islike now.
I'm a lot more careful when I'meating and drinking and things
(04:17):
like that.
But what was your upbringing?
Speaker 1 (04:21):
like my upbringing, I would say I don't usually have
anything to say because I camefrom a broken home, honestly.
So a lot of things didn't workout for me as a child.
(04:41):
The last time I saw my mom anddad together was about seven,
when I was seven years, and thatwas it.
So I've been on my own for thelongest time, even though I had
to stay with people, but thekind of love and affection that
you would get from like bothparents or like co-parents, and
(05:02):
I didn't get that.
So at a very tender age Istarted looking out for myself
and I've had this for thelongest time that nobody's going
to save you, and that is what Ihave used in my life all these
years.
Nobody's going to work for me,nobody's going to get the job
done for me.
Whatever I want to achieve inlife, if I don't get up and
(05:23):
doing myself, nobody's going tosave me.
So that's me.
So I tried to put in 100% noprocrastination.
I don't procrastinate, trust me, because coming from a child
who wears, you don't really getthe love and the support from
the people that you think wereyour God at that time.
(05:45):
You know our parents areusually our first God on earth.
So if you don't get that, youfall, you become very lonely.
You become a child that, ifcare is not taken, you lose
confidence in yourself and thenyou become very lonely.
I think that was how mychildhood was, because I didn't
(06:06):
really get that love, thatattention, all the nicest things
.
I never got that.
So it's made me become very onthe offence side of life.
So anytime something littlehappens it triggers a lot of me,
(06:29):
a lot of dioxide out of me.
So because I get to feel like,oh, I'm in the world over myself
, nobody's going to save me.
How am I going to get this done?
I have to make it happen.
I don't want people to see I'ma loser.
So you're always, you're alwayson the go to make sure that you
are step ahead of your enemiesor anybody that wants to put you
(06:51):
down.
Speaker 2 (06:52):
Yeah, that was a day I cried.
Speaker 1 (06:58):
Okay.
Speaker 2 (07:00):
It's probably the 20th time I've cried, but this
particular day I rememberbecause something happened, and
with one of my brothers, andthen my mom called me.
Speaker 1 (07:10):
Yeah.
Speaker 2 (07:10):
She said you're the only one we have.
You know, help out, do this, dothat.
And the first thing I said tomy mom was that, yeah, I
understand.
My biggest issue, mom, is I'mhere, thank God, to help.
Yeah, but if I need help, who'sgoing to help me?
Speaker 1 (07:33):
Yeah, that's the thing.
Speaker 2 (07:36):
And as soon as I left the phone I broke into tears
because I realized at that pointthat I'm the only person I have
, but it looks like everybodyelse has.
Speaker 1 (07:46):
Has you.
Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, that'sdeep.
That's deep because a lot oftimes society has made us so
much that you don't have to showyour weakness, you don't have
to go to anybody for help.
(08:06):
But trust me, I am in a spacewhere I have I'm very privileged
to have a lot of people, goodpeople.
If I talk about good people,I'm so blessed to have good
people around me that I can callwhen, not financially, but when
I'm emotionally down, I'm ableto open up, cry my heart out for
(08:27):
them to feel where I am,without any form of judgment.
So there, I'm secured, becauseyou being everything for your
family and you saying you don'thave anybody to fall on when you
have to should be a man thing.
(08:50):
Where we are brought up, men aresinging not to have milk, not
to have meltdown.
But it's okay if you have tobreak down in front of people.
It's okay if you have to cryfor people to know that, hey,
things are not all right withyou.
But men usually don't come outlike that.
But we women we do.
We usually break down, we talkto people, get just to let us
(09:16):
have this bedding off, nottotally, but at a point in time,
even talking to somebody thatyou trash so much about things
that are weighing you down in away gives you some sort of
upliftment, you know, even ifyou don't get a result there,
and then there's this weightthat lifts you, at least for you
(09:41):
to be able to open up tosomebody then butchling it up.
I keep saying that all the time.
I can never be that person,that when I'm going through
stuff so I want to go through itall by myself.
Yeah, I would always want totalk to people about things I go
through and I'm not shy to talkabout it.
You know why?
(10:01):
Because I feel and I'm not shywhen people laugh about my
downfalls I'm not because I'mnot perfect there's no straight
path to success.
So it would be good for them tolaugh at me now and then again
when I make a big double, like,yeah, you remember that girl?
(10:22):
I used to know her.
She used to be that girl thatwas so like seriously, at my
home.
She used to be a failure, butthen again, I didn't just stay
down there, I tried through, Imade my way through out to the
top.
So I think people shouldactually be able to express
(10:42):
themselves like the real percentof them, like not hiding stuff
behind themselves, like the faceof Instagram or like social
media, where people feeleverything you have, it will put
together, but in reality, youhave a lot of things weighing
down.
Speaker 2 (11:00):
Yeah well, when you are in the now, on the age of
social media, a lot of thingsare covered.
Speaker 1 (11:05):
Yeah.
Speaker 2 (11:06):
And everybody is concerned about how protecting
an image.
Speaker 1 (11:10):
You have to protect an image.
Speaker 2 (11:12):
The same pictures you put on the Instagram.
That's what you're protecting.
Speaker 1 (11:14):
Yes, in a home.
Yes, concerned about all thosethings, yeah.
Speaker 2 (11:18):
You know, but yeah sometimes it's necessary, you
know it's necessary to speak outand then let people know, but
at that time I just had to.
I just felt it yeah, becauseyou know this is happening, that
is happening, that is happening.
And they all come into Derek,yeah.
And then, like you're thinkingto yourself well, who am I going
to?
Yeah, we have God.
(11:39):
Well, yeah, that's a goodanswer.
Everybody else is going to.
No, they have God.
But you should know you shouldknow.
Speaker 1 (11:45):
This is what I have to tell you.
I am more.
We are all spiritual, but Iconnect more on a level whereby,
anytime I'm in a position tohelp somebody, I always thank
God, and I always thank God forbeing able to put me in that
situation to be able to help.
(12:06):
Yes, exactly.
So I don't glorify helpingpeople.
I see it to be me being aninstrument for God to use to
bless people.
Yeah.
Speaker 2 (12:15):
Yeah, yeah, that's the purpose of Abandoned is
anyway.
Speaker 1 (12:18):
Yes, yeah.
So that is why you're nevergoing to lack.
Yeah, because he's always goingto use you as a channel to
bless his people.
Yeah, yeah.
Speaker 2 (12:28):
You know, I think we have some conversations about
your time at school, earlystages.
Speaker 1 (12:37):
How I got into styling.
Yeah, okay, so, yeah.
So I've always been that kindof person that I would say I'm
really attracted to people'spersonal branding.
Back in the days it was how youlook, you look.
But now I think we've modifiedit by same personal branding.
(12:58):
As a brand, or as an individual,you should have an identity and
an identity.
I would always say that.
Let me say this Chris Brown hasan identity.
Every time he's, he tries to dowild styles because he's an
artist.
You get me.
(13:18):
So that is his identity as anartist.
So everybody relate to him asthat.
Imagine seeing Chris Browndressed, dressing up in like
what's it called Seriousshooting tie, with his what's it
called?
Like a tux, with his shoes andall that it would be like.
(13:40):
It will come to us as like asurprise.
But over the years we've seenhis style, his blonde hair, the
kind of wild, crazy hair he does.
So we relate to them more ashis identity because he's an
artist.
Okay, so let's say you're what,do you?
An entrepreneur and you'retrying to go seek a contract,
(14:04):
right?
I say this all the time.
You always address by how youlook, trust me.
And if you want to be addressed, I say I'm a bologna, you have
to start dressing like when,right.
And I think a week ago I had aclient who said she was going to
meet somebody for a contractand she wants to underdress.
(14:25):
So the person doesn't feelshe's coming in to radio him or
for something.
And I was like, no, you have todress like a million bucks.
So when you're bidding for acontract or an amount for him to
pay, he'll know that that isnot even that's peanut for you.
But here in Ghana, where wefound ourselves like, a lot of
(14:46):
people try to underdress.
I don't know if it's the factthat they don't see the value of
doing it or it's just thatyou're lazy about it.
Speaker 2 (14:57):
I don't know if you realize that here in Ghana yeah,
I guess, from what I'mgathering, then it's better to
overdress than underdress.
That's what you're saying.
Speaker 1 (15:04):
Not overdress.
You don't have to overdress,but just look presentable.
And when we talk about beinglooking presentable, you have to
look the path where you'regoing.
Okay, you have to look the pathto where you're going, For
instance, when you are invitedinto a meeting I say this in all
in respect to business, becausebusiness is always a place is
(15:27):
that you'd have to elevateyourself and prove a point in
every the circle you findyourself and you're being
invited into a business meetingand you just wear like a t-shirt
or something.
Derek, you have to be abillionaire to be wearing that
t-shirt, yeah, for real.
For real, because that meansyou're going in there, you're
(15:47):
not going to ask for anything.
But if you're going to ask forsomething and even in the dating
space, as women I would evensay that some women tries to you
can be a total tenor for a man,or a total tenor for a man Okay
.
So you have to be able to knowhow to balance it.
You have to look in a way thata man would be like oh, this
(16:10):
girl can be somebody I can takehome by.
In another way can be a freak.
There has to be a balance.
There has to be a balance ineverything that you do.
For instance, we have I'mtalking for myself ladies that
have very longer nails and thenyou have boobs spilling out and
(16:30):
all that.
As a lady, I think you shouldbe able to dress appropriately
depending on where you're going.
Even if you want to look sexy,you can look sexy, and you can
look sexy and appealing at thesame time.
They're looking trashy.
Speaker 2 (16:46):
Finally, you mentioned the nails.
Speaker 1 (16:48):
Yeah.
Speaker 2 (16:49):
There was a time my wife and I saw an image of this
lady who had nails about thatlong.
And then I showed it to her andshe was like how is she going
to clean the bum?
Yeah, they think it's like howis she going to use her phone?
Speaker 1 (17:03):
Yeah, you will need a different type of fingers to be
able to do all of that, but hey, you know, it's nice, it's nice
.
No, that is not.
That is not being a lady, andyou have to.
As I was saying, you have to beable to balance everything that
you do Life, you have to bevery intentional about it and
(17:26):
when it comes to physicalappearance, like how to put your
looks together, you always haveto calculate the kind of
audience you're meeting everytime you have to meet somebody.
I remember I was telling youearlier today that, dressing up
like this, it took me like fiveor different five to six looks
(17:46):
for me to be able to say hereOkay, with this basic shirt and
sneakers, I have, it wouldn'ttake me that long?
Yes, because I needed to fitinto your audience, because you
said it was a podcast.
So I had to dress.
You were not expecting me to beon heels, have like a dress up
on.
I wanted it to look more casualand fun.
(18:06):
So then I had to dress to fitinto the space.
I didn't do much, I didn't do.
It's just a T-shirt on there,but I had to calculate the look
and vision, how it's going tocome out, before I get it done.
Speaker 2 (18:20):
So there's always a thought process.
Speaker 1 (18:21):
Yes.
So, every look, I would sayanytime that I have to step out,
even if I'm going to the salon,I think through what I have to
wear, what is appropriate forthe salon, Wow, I need a
different kind of brain.
Speaker 2 (18:36):
Maybe, because you're a man, because I can show up in
church like this.
I can show up in a familymeeting like this.
I can show up at the officelike this.
Speaker 1 (18:46):
Depending on the kind of office you go to, depending
on the kind of office If you'regoing into bid for a contract.
Speaker 2 (18:53):
Can't go looking shabby.
Speaker 1 (18:54):
You can't.
You have to look like the moneyyou are about.
No, I think you even have tolook twice of whatever you're
going to look for.
So let's say the way you smell.
The way you smell Veryimportant, yeah.
So all those things play a verymajor role in how you are being
(19:16):
perceived for the first time.
Speaker 2 (19:18):
That's no branding Right.
You want to brand Derek.
Speaker 1 (19:23):
Yeah.
Speaker 2 (19:24):
What would be the process and the decision making
at the end, and which partswould I play into your imagined
image?
Speaker 1 (19:35):
So usually people don't like to step out from
their comfort zone.
People would always want tostep out.
When they've outgrown wherethey are and they feel the
circle that they are fallinginto they don't meet or they
don't meet that standard.
That is when they startrealizing they have to work on
(19:55):
themselves.
I have a lot of clients likethat.
Usually when I have a packagethat I sell on for people and
some people, when you sell itout for them, they don't even
see the essence.
So now I've stopped selling it,I've stopped talking about it,
because I always want people tohit the rock.
When they hit the rock, theycan back being ready.
(20:17):
So imagine coming to you hey,Derek, I want to brand you, I
want you to start looking good,I want you to start looking
sharp and all that.
I would come and maybe talk toyou about 45 minutes or 30
minutes or 20 minutes maximum orsomething.
But I kid you not, you didn'tget any.
You were in a mood by any.
It's more like marketing.
But when you start associatingyourself with the big boys, you
(20:41):
start going into their midst.
You see how they roll, how theyput their things together.
Psychologically you're affected.
So in the midst, in their midst.
You would want to fit in.
So that is when you come backto the drawing board to see how
can I be?
How can I be, how can I getinto the group where people were
(21:04):
identifying me as part of thegroup?
So imagine going into a settingwhereby you see like five men
or five women setting up.
You would always know the alphaof the group.
But how they look, how theytalk and the way people approach
them, I don't know if you getwhat I'm saying.
(21:26):
No, no.
Speaker 2 (21:26):
I get it.
I'm listening very attentively,I get it completely and I get
what you're saying.
It is the association thatdetermines how you're going to
dress.
Speaker 1 (21:39):
I got a male client, a man who has really risen up
there like that.
So he came.
It was a project we had on sothey were taking him through the
etiquette stuff Corporate guy,very big man, golden stuff, like
that.
He's into the mind firm.
But he's realized where he'sfalling into now.
(22:00):
He's not fit for that.
So we had to go through thewhole process with him Personal
grooming, how to take care ofhimself, and it's not a bad
thing A lot of people don't know.
Some people focus more on justthe job and then forget the
personal brand.
Like you know Tony or Nulemirior something.
(22:23):
The UBA guy?
No, you don't know him.
That man is good with branding.
You should check him out.
Like he's always in the redsuit and the red tie in a suit
but look, his looks are alwaysahead Because he has a whole
team that takes care of hispersonal branding.
(22:43):
You should hook him up.
Speaker 2 (22:44):
You should look at him on Instagram.
Speaker 1 (22:46):
The owner of UBA Bank .
You know UBA, the Nigerian Bank.
Yes, he has a whole team thatflies with him.
He's always in just black shirtand black polo shirt.
He had even worse sneakers,that much.
But you can see the guy is hislooks are thoroughly well put
together.
(23:07):
So that is a man that he wouldgo into the midst of people and
there's so much respect, hecommands so much confidence, the
way he even walks would be ableto tell you that this man has a
good personal branding going onthere.
You know, most of the time yousee CEOs and entrepreneurs and
(23:27):
you go like, oh really, is thisreally the brain behind the
brand?
Your brand should match thepersonality.
I say that all the time Becausepeople will not start taking
you serious.
A lot of people would.
I would say.
People usually try to resonatewith yourself than your brand.
When you have proper brandinggoing on, oh, you don't, you
(23:51):
don't, you don't care to whatI'm saying.
Speaker 2 (23:52):
No, no, no, no, I do, I do, I'm taking my turn.
Speaker 1 (23:56):
Imagine people see the brand behind Connected mind.
The guy has a great personality.
The guy has a.
This guy.
I will talk about futuristicKwame.
I used to work with Kwame at MX.
People really didn't see my too, but he started associating
himself with the Vuzi guy.
The Vuzi guy, the South Africanguy.
(24:18):
The guy is good with personalbranding and now Kwame is able
to command so much Was a crowd.
He ain't gonna.
I see, yes.
So I think personal branding issomething that we have to.
Every individual has to work onit, have an identity.
If you are a white shirt guy,make sure you you you nail the
(24:38):
hell out of the white teeth youwear all the time.
So anybody that sees you in awhite is maybe the little asses
you're going to have on is goingto make the look come out
really, really great.
You get what I'm saying, but Isay that today you see people in
different stuff, differentstuff and, yeah, all over they.
(24:59):
They try hard to have anidentity.
Somebody like Thames themusician we don't really know
her identity, I don't reallyknow her brand name because
she's all over, she's all over,and that is something that, with
personal branding, you shouldbe able to come out with
(25:20):
something.
Speaker 2 (25:21):
You identify Exactly what's that.
Speaker 1 (25:24):
Somebody has a hat they wear as their brand
identity wherever they find them.
So, yes, anybody that sees youknows that you have to come up
with a hat.
This is very interesting.
Yep, very interesting.
I never thought about it likethat.
Speaker 2 (25:42):
It's very interesting .
I may have to work on my brand.
You will all learn it.
No, no, your prices are cool.
Speaker 1 (25:48):
Prices are cool depending on how you put them
together.
I say that all the time.
So it's not about doing themost, but being intentional
about what you do.
That is what you have to put inmind.
So you can choose to even wear,like, a Louis Vuitton shirt,
which doesn't even make sense,but it will still not look.
Fly on you, but it depends onhow you are able to put that
(26:10):
look together to suit yourpersonal brand.
Speaker 2 (26:15):
Personally, I don't like clothes that have brands in
them.
Speaker 1 (26:19):
I think it's cliche now.
Speaker 2 (26:21):
Yes, cliche now, I don't like that.
Especially this part of theworld, you can never really know
whether it's original.
Speaker 1 (26:28):
So I don't really like them.
Speaker 2 (26:31):
I watch shoes, jeans and t-shirts.
I don't really.
Speaker 1 (26:36):
You know, the rich people, the wealthy people,
usually do street brands.
They do a lot of street brandsbecause clothes are things that
we are going to use more often.
So maybe the shoes andaccessories and the bags would
make a difference, because whenyou have a lot you'll be able to
change, but with clothes theseare things that we will be
wearing every day.
So I think those things shouldbe like basic styles that we
(26:59):
should get, not really investmuch in it, but be able to get
qualities that make so muchsense here.
Speaker 2 (27:10):
You were speaking about how you got yourself into
personal brand Personal stylingyes.
And then, though, something yousaid when we were speaking
about you sitting at the frontrolling class, which I thought
was very nice.
Speaker 1 (27:27):
So usually back in school I would go to canton
manteau to get clothes becauseI'd always wanted to be that
girl that I look all fly, allfly in a nice way.
Somebody would turn and look atyou and be like, oh nice, this
is nice, I really like this.
Not in a seductive way, don'tget me wrong, but in a very, I
(27:50):
think, respectful way.
Respectful way, yes, that's theword.
So back in school I wouldalways be the last to come into
the classroom, but always sit infront.
I walk in right before thelecture comes in, sit right in
front and immediately he's done,I stand and I walk out of the
class.
So eventually people startednoticing me and people would
(28:13):
approach oh hey, you're the girl, can I be your friend?
I like who you're wearing.
Where did you get that from?
So that was how I made friendsthrough what I was wearing in
school.
Not too much, I wasn't evendoing too much because I was
always in jeans and stuff aswell, but the fact that I was
able to put them together andfor it to look very attractive
(28:36):
on me for people to complimentthat.
I think that was how I was ableto get acquainted with people
like my classmates and stufflike that, and even people out
on my Seniors and stuff.
Yes, my seniors, my seniorslike that.
So after school, after myservice, I had this friend from
(28:57):
school that had just traveled toNigeria.
I got back that morning and shewas a designer.
She was a designer.
We intended going to design inschool, but I was like I'm not
the kind of person that I liketo sit at one place for long, so
I like to move, I always wantto move.
So she went into school todesign and after that she was.
(29:22):
Then she invited me and saidone morning where she was
shooting with Becca, and thatmorning she invited me over to
take her on set because she madethe outfit as well.
So I got on set and Becca had astylist.
Funny enough, all the All whatthe stylist was doing, I was so
(29:43):
itchy to get it done so, out ofnowhere, my friend just told
Becca that oh, she's a stylist,my friend is a stylist.
The next morning I had a callfrom my friend that Becca said
she was having an event thatevening and she wanted me to
style her.
And that's how I've been astylist for this long.
Speaker 2 (30:03):
Wow, that's beautiful .
Speaker 1 (30:05):
Yeah, that was how I ended up, because I say this all
the time, so suppose I didn'tfollow my friend that day.
Where would my destiny be now?
Because I just listened to thevoice.
I was like a girl just out ofschool.
I finished my service, I washome and largely I didn't have
anything to do, so I justfollowed her on set for her to
(30:27):
wear the clothes for the lady aswell.
So she called me and she waslike she wanted to.
She wanted me to style her fora concert that was in December.
That was December 2015.
Yes, 2015,.
Yes, and I style her and it hasbeen from that day.
Speaker 2 (30:50):
Yeah, yeah, but one of the things I wanted to know
was you know what's the thoughtprocess though?
You see, when you see a person,what's the thought process?
Is it just you pick the clothesand then that's you like it's
gonna fit that person, it'sgonna fit that person?
Or you actually picture a typeof outfit for a person and then
(31:13):
you just go for it, or you haveoptions.
Speaker 1 (31:16):
Okay, so this is it, I think, with styling first of
all, before I choose an outfitor I style anybody, I always ask
people of what they do.
Based on what you do, wedetermine the kind of outfit
that will go with you.
And in terms of, like, yourbody type, your complexion, the
(31:41):
event you're attending, thatalso play a measure.
With the color palette, things,colors that look good on you,
all those things play a measurebefore I would even come up with
an outfit.
So I just don't pick.
Maybe you're going out and youdon't have to like in terms of
ladies, you don't have to wearsomething short where, if you
(32:04):
said, you would feeluncomfortable.
And many are times you people,you see people at events that
you'll be like, oh, did shereally come out from the house?
Because they didn't reallythink properly about the kind of
people they were meeting, thekind of crowd they were coming
into.
So, as a stylist, what I do isI help you put all those things
(32:24):
in place before you even come upto put an outfit on for you to
look good.
Speaker 2 (32:31):
Yes, I see yes, so you do that work.
Speaker 1 (32:35):
Yes, I do that work.
I plan all the looks.
I create mood boards.
I don't just we create moodboards, I send you mood boards
of the looks we are trying toperceive the shoes that will go
with the looks, the hair thatwill go, the kind of makeup that
will go with the looks, theaccessories that will go with it
, the bags that will go with thelooks, In fact.
So a whole lot of process goesinto it.
(32:57):
So when you're choosing anoutfit, you just don't choose
because it's an outfit, it'snice.
I've gotten into a boutique,I've seen this cool outfit and I
know it's going to work on meand I'm just buying it to wear
to an event.
Nope.
Speaker 2 (33:10):
That's what I do most of the time.
You just pick here like no, nothat's nice.
Speaker 1 (33:14):
No, no, no, no Okay.
Speaker 2 (33:16):
Yes, there's a process to it.
Speaker 1 (33:18):
Yeah, yeah, yeah, no, I just and a lot of people
think styling is just forcelebrities.
But I don't think that's it,because anybody that is trying
to leave a Mac or trying tobuild a brand should have a
personal stylist.
Yes, but here it's been so hardhere, to be honest with you,
(33:41):
because when I started I wasgetting a lot of celebrity jobs
like most of the clientele baysI had were all celebrities.
But over the years I've evolved.
I realized that people reallyneed help.
Celebrities are all we see, buton a daily basis, a lot of
people need help.
So I started with the personalstyling, where I try to look
(34:05):
into people's personal lives tobe able to come up with wardrobe
capsules for them, things thatwill suit their personality and
their brand.
So if they are going now, theyhave varieties of stuff to wear
that would make them feelcomfortable in it as well.
So most people, like women,most people always end up
(34:27):
wearing loose stuff all the time.
Have you realized?
You always wear like a shirt.
The normal thing is a whiteshirt for ladies, the men to
white shirt, that's it.
They don't really add anythingto it and they just wear like
that.
Speaker 2 (34:42):
That's true, I'm learning.
I just didn't think this wholething was that deep.
It's deep.
I just thought, look, if I'mgoing to church and I need to
see you go, like four or fiveseats pick one of them, wear it.
This is where, if I'm going,for a wedding get one.
(35:02):
I didn't really think I have tosit down for you to make a plan
about my life and the thingsI'm going to wear.
Speaker 1 (35:09):
If you're able to plan about what you put in your
body, why not?
Don't you want to?
Yes, If you have to plan onthings you like.
I remember when we were havingbreakfast you said you don't
take a meat, so why can't youplan what you look like for
people to see?
Speaker 2 (35:23):
I guess I do, I guess I should, you should.
Speaker 1 (35:27):
I think those are things that we should have.
You should have wardrobestaples, things that people
would find in your wardrobe.
Those things are like a go-tostuff that every day you can use
.
But then again, a lot of peopledon't prioritize that.
A lot of people have clothes intheir closet, but anytime they
(35:48):
have to go out they have to shop.
Yes, and to tell you the truth,the last time I don't even shop
.
I hardly shop, because I makethe most out of the things I buy
, things I'm very intentionalabout it.
I'm able to buy things that I'mable to restyle, so that I
don't have to be buying newclothes all the time.
(36:09):
And then, when it even comes tocolors of shoes, of bags I buy,
I always think about colors.
Yes, yes, you have to thinkabout things that you can be
using in diverse ways thanhaving only an outfit or a shoe
or a bag that you're able to useonce a year.
Speaker 2 (36:31):
I love it, I love it, I love it, I love it, I love it
.
I'm empowered.
That's it.
Speaker 1 (36:38):
I love it.
So I say this all the time.
I think my confidence level hasreally gotten to the space
where I don't think anybody canbreak me, because I tell you
what.
Tell me.
Speaker 2 (36:54):
So even starting to wear rings was something I had
to get used to, and thenstarting to wear glasses.
Now how are people going tolook at it?
People are going to think I'mbeing weird, I'm trying to be
(37:17):
extra.
I used to like to keep itsimple, but now I'm getting
there.
Now I'm adding some necklacesand things like that, and people
still see me and they're likeoh right, you got a ring there
and then a ring there.
And then we're like, okay, I'mjust trying, yeah, yeah.
Speaker 1 (37:38):
A lot of people find it so hard coming out from their
comfort zone.
That's the thing what they'velearned all their lives.
I think humans are naturallyunder man to change.
For me telling a client to wearsomething short above her knee,
or wearing a crop top I wearcrop top a lot because I like to
sometimes define, not crop topin a very seductive way but just
(38:01):
show a little bit of skin.
As a woman, you always don'thave to be all covered,
depending on where you're going.
Sometimes you have to show ifit's a weekend show, some back
show, some.
You know what I'm saying.
So clients like oh, where doesit say should be like with which
stomach?
That's the first thing theywill ask me.
I'm like you're perfect, buttell me, doesn't have to be
(38:23):
totally flat for you beforeyou'll be able to wear that.
If you do that, you'll be stuckwith boring stuff all the time
You'll be stuck with.
But you have to be able tolengthen it Brings some
excitement, excitement, exactly,exactly.
If you're going out with yourfriends, your girlfriend, you
(38:44):
want to look very youthful, andstuff like that, you should add
some sort of you know someelement that will make you look
more sexy.
Yeah.
Speaker 2 (38:55):
Well then, I guess there's a fine line between
being sexy and being seductive.
Then, yes, you see a lot of theladies showing a lot of
cleavage.
Speaker 1 (39:05):
Okay.
So with the cleavage thing, youcan show a little as a lady.
Actually let me rephrase it asa lady you can show cleavage,
but not too much.
The thing is you have to keepthe mind wondering what is there
?
It's like opening up of a cakeor opening food up.
You don't open it too much, youjust open for people to smell
(39:25):
the aroma.
You close it back, so peoplewould be curious to know what's
been in there.
That's the thing.
But the thing is, when youspill everything out and they
are saying so what are theygoing to be curious about to see
again?
Speaker 2 (39:38):
Nothing.
Some of the men too are sayingthat if you're showing it too
much, then you're causingtrouble for other men.
How are you going to?
And it's making other men wantto chase after the women and
things like that.
So they want it all closed.
Speaker 1 (39:58):
No, all closed.
In a way that you don't get meLike if I'm not saying you
should make everything short Ina way you tease a bit, is that
it doesn't have to be allcovered, because myself I've
been guilty for some time now,because anytime I go out with my
husband, okay, I show more ofcurves than skin.
(40:20):
I feel that's what I've beendoing.
But now I have to beintentional about there should
be a balance where I showed moreof a little bit of the cleavage
and stuff like that for it tobe about that.
Speaker 2 (40:31):
When you're with your husband.
Speaker 1 (40:32):
Just when I'm with my husband.
That is not that I'm going outlike telling people, yes, it's
not that I'm going out ortelling people, okay, I need a
man, or like I need a man tocall me.
But then again you're with aman and you'll be like, damn,
she's sexy, she's with her man.
Yeah, you get what I'm saying,so that your man doesn't look at
(40:52):
other sexy girls.
What else?
You look boring beside him.
Speaker 2 (40:57):
Yeah, you know what.
Speaker 1 (40:59):
That's the truth.
You know sometimes.
Speaker 2 (41:00):
That's the truth.
Yeah, that's the truth.
That's the truth, yeah.
Speaker 1 (41:06):
You have to look like that.
You have to.
You can be the good girl, butyou have to be there.
Good girl bad girl, bad girl aswell.
There should be a balance.
He can't be.
Speaker 2 (41:15):
Is there a time that a woman would dress, having in
mind that the men are going tolook at this?
Speaker 1 (41:22):
Yeah, depending on the type of woman the woman that
you're talking about we have alot of women Because as part of
the dressing, the styling, youknow it's there.
Speaker 2 (41:31):
is there a conscious effort to, to review certain
things, to gain attention fromthe opposite?
Speaker 1 (41:38):
sex?
Absolutely, okay, absolutely,depending on the kind of woman
that you're talking about.
If a woman is taken, or if awoman really wants a man,
obviously she's going to do thatfor attention.
But a woman who is classy andelegant, I think we show you
something, but we're not showyou much.
(42:00):
We know we don't show you much.
But the people we have, thepeople that are in town that
they are like hey, I'm here,call me, this is what I'm here
for.
And then we have the other typeof women that I'm classy, I'm
sexy, but I'm not looking for aman.
How about that?
Speaker 2 (42:19):
Yeah, that's, that's also the one.
See me personally.
I didn't choose my wife becauseshe was showing me things.
I chose her because that's justwho I liked.
Speaker 1 (42:32):
Obviously, no man chooses any man because of that.
When I talk about choosing,it's not for kids.
You're an adult, so you shouldknow what I'm talking about.
So yeah, of course, like goingout to the club dressing, most
people come to the club forhookups and being an SWE.
So obviously when you'reselling something, you have to
display it well for people tosee it.
(42:52):
So if you're selling, you haveto display it properly.
But somebody who comes to theclub who just want to have fun,
I don't think will overlydisplay much because she's just
there for a good time.
She's there not to attract men.
I've been in the club whereI've seen women that have
(43:13):
dressed like really nice, sexy,but not too much of an attention
, but they are just there tohave fun.
Those kind of women aredifferent from the people that
they're selling.
You should know.
You should know.
Speaker 2 (43:34):
Well, we're selling, but yeah, how do you bring
somebody to the realization thatthey have to start being
confident about the new outfitor the new brand that you've
given them?
Speaker 1 (43:52):
Okay, yeah, I say this all the time depending on
what you face and the scope youfind yourself, you try to adjust
yourself.
That's what I just said.
When you start meeting CEOs,you start sitting in boardrooms
with top CEOs and you see theway they even dress, the way
they smell the watch they have,the kind of things they wear,
(44:16):
your mind will start positioningthat, hey, you have to blend in
.
Speaker 2 (44:20):
So you get the client to do it themselves, so you
don't have any.
No, I do that.
Speaker 1 (44:25):
The fact is, when I come to you telling you I want
to do the dd-d-d-d-d-d, and thatat that time you'll be like
what is this One of theinstances this girl talking
about?
When you go out in the worldand you start seeing people that
you realize that you are notmatching up to the standard,
then you come back to me.
That is when I'll help you andwith that they are easy for
change.
But when you go in there tryingto talk to them, to change the
(44:48):
scope of how they pray, theyfeel very undermined.
They don't even see the essenceof it being that way.
It's just like what's it called?
That was the best example thatI can cite right now.
When people don't take good careof their health and when their
health start deteriorating allof a sudden, when you tell them
(45:10):
100 drugs to make them feel good, they will buy without even
complaining.
Oh yeah, so people have aproblem you can solve.
You can give them a solution.
If they don't realize they havea problem, trust me, every
solution you get give them isnot going to work for them.
Speaker 2 (45:25):
Yeah, that's true, I mean there are.
There are some patients thatyou know they have to have a
first episode of stroke beforethey start taking their yes,
hypertension, exactly regularlyyou know, especially some of us
they just don't like taking themtaking them.
Speaker 1 (45:41):
You know, I understand people have to hit
that that, yes, when they hitthe rock, like people telling
you oh, um, my husband doesn'tlook coming off in, now I want
to get my groove back on,they've realized, maybe they've
noticed the man Is not givingthem the attention they want.
So now they want to feel sexyagain.
That is when they will comeback to you, hmm, but if they
(46:01):
are okay, they wouldn't see anydifference in doing all that
bedroom branding as well.
No, no bedroom brand.
As a woman, everything that'stalks about confidence in a
woman is what I Would reallywant to.
That is what I said.
Anything that would bring awoman's confidence back, I'm up
for it.
People that go to postpartumdepression a lot of women go
(46:23):
through that.
The body changes afterchildbirth.
A lot of women are not able todeal with it and, and Loki,
people don't talk about it.
And then you realize that theystart wearing loose doubts all
the time and then you hear themtalking about oh, when I was
there before I had kids, I had agreat buddy, I had this, I had
great buddy.
But what changed Childbirth?
(46:45):
But I feel childbirth shouldn'trestrict you from being yourself
.
A lot of women fall under thatumbrella of because I have kids,
my body has changed and I can'tlook like the way I used to
look.
But I feel every woman, aftersome time you have to get your
body in shape, you have to getyour groove back on because,
(47:05):
mind you me, the men who tellyou oh, you're okay, you're that
, you that, but they didn't meetyou like that.
They didn't meet you like that.
That's, that wasn't what theymarried to.
They married Even thoughchanges are prone to happen.
But you have to make aconscious effort to make sure
that, even even if it's not forthe man, for you yourself as a
(47:26):
woman.
You have to be so confident inyourself, in your body, and how
you even dress should be moreappealing for yourself.
So I say this all the times lookat yourself a Five years of you
from now and ask if you'll beable to date yourself.
Okay, there should be aconstant change in in in you the
(47:48):
more you go.
There should be constant changein how you put yourself
together and stuff like that badIf you.
If you look at people like fiveyears ago and five years from
now.
A lot of women stop doing allof that After they get married.
I don't know why they stop,they just stop.
But before marriage, don't bedressing, doing the right things
(48:11):
, but right after marriage isstop everything.
Forgetting marriage is a longtime thing.
Speaker 2 (48:16):
They were selling.
Now it's been bought.
Speaker 1 (48:18):
Even, even, even if it has been bought, they should
always be maintenance.
Maintenance is key because youalways have to maintain what
you've bought or else is notgoing to, it's not going to look
fresh, yeah, so you always haveto maintain it.
They should always bemaintenance as well.
Speaker 2 (48:47):
I'm definitely for married women and men, yes,
taking care of themselves yes athome because I I realized that
I was losing hair here.
Okay.
So Actually, I thought, losingmy hair one of about 19 years,
wow.
So when I got married, yes, itwent like it went like that.
(49:08):
Oh, okay, the kids came in, wow.
So I want to take it.
And I got it done.
What did you do?
I did a hair transplant.
Speaker 1 (49:14):
So I?
Is it the laser?
Speaker 2 (49:18):
no Proposed hair transplant where they take it
from the back of my hair andthen put it here.
So I got that done.
Speaker 1 (49:24):
Yeah, because I remember the first time I met
you, wasn't that?
I did it about two years ago.
Oh yeah, cuz I met you.
It was, it wasn't this so wasit that the hair wasn't growing
or what it just went?
Wow, was it the weather inLondon money precious, love
money precious money precious.
(49:45):
Does it count?
It does it?
Yeah, I want money, and it's myfamily as well.
My daddy, yeah, of course.
If isn't, I think it's a hairduty stuff.
Speaker 2 (49:52):
I'm still gonna go back and get a crown down
because they have to do in twoparts.
Speaker 1 (49:56):
Wow, but it's all part of my that you've been
asking, man, you as a man,you've been able to do that.
I would say I really applaudyou for that, because a lot of
people would have just been like, oh, what is it like?
I'm a man.
If I have the money, what elsedo I have to keep away?
And that is what happens here alot.
I say that all the time.
Like men here, aside their carsand their houses, they have
(50:19):
nothing to prove.
So the first thing that they,they know not for you, yo, true
man, the first thing that I wantyou to see when they meet you
up with, when they meet up withyou, is the car.
And then they invite you Totheir house to see and that's
safe.
They feel if they show you thistwo things, then that's it.
But I feel the personaldevelopment is something that
women should be attracted to inmen.
(50:40):
That here, ah, anything goesthey want a man who has the, the
, the, the cousin, the musical,the cousin, the house.
That will not give them any.
Yeah, but for rather fall forthat than a man on a mission,
yeah, yeah.
Speaker 2 (50:55):
I understand.
Yeah, so I think it helped me alot.
Yeah, who stopped my confidence?
And yeah, I remember when mywife she was about to deliver.
Hmm when a conversation and shesaid she started saying some
things and I pressed record.
She goes make sure when Ideliver you're gonna push me to
(51:19):
lose the weight.
Speaker 1 (51:20):
Okay.
Speaker 2 (51:21):
And I said how do you want me to do it?
And she said say nasty thingsto me To get her to exercise,
okay.
And I did that, you did thatand she's done, amazing, amazing
, wow.
Speaker 1 (51:35):
She's done, amazing, wow.
Speaker 2 (51:36):
So it's good we work on ourselves.
Speaker 1 (51:38):
Yes.
Speaker 2 (51:38):
We shouldn't just give up just because we found
espoused and things like that.
So the personal aspect of ourlives need to carry on.
Speaker 1 (51:45):
Exactly, yeah, exactly.
I think it's a whole lot of fun.
And then again, I don't blamepeople as much in the country,
because if you have a lot offinancial burdens on you, you
know even be able to take goodcare of yourself, trust you me.
But then again we can't faultthat all the time.
You have to be intentionalabout your life and you don't
(52:07):
have to look like your problem,that's it, whoa.
You have to look like yourproblem.
You have to have command overyour problem, because the
problem met you.
It didn't meet the problem, soyou were there before the
problem.
So definitely the problemshould outshine you the
individual.
Yeah, you know, yeah, that's sodeep.
Yes, yeah, life is all aboutbeing intentional about yourself
(52:30):
all the time.
If you're not, it's just goingto swallow you, because the
problem will never end.
Speaker 2 (52:35):
It never goes away.
It never goes away, it nevergoes away Kiddy.
Speaker 1 (52:42):
He said, well, allow me make her enjoy life, problem,
no, go finish her.
That's it, it's true.
When I heard that lyrics I waslike wow, it's true, it's never
going to end.
So you have to live your lifeto the fullest by dressing all
the time, looking good all thetime, feeling good, the feeling
you have when you are well puttogether.
I don't know for men, but forwomen for me.
Speaker 2 (53:04):
I think I've already told you when I did my hair.
You know, when you first do thehair, you get scabs a lot.
It looks very bad.
Wow, I was confident as fuck.
I was like you're taking thisout and I said yeah, because I
know the destination.
Speaker 1 (53:24):
What happened?
What happened?
So the hair?
So does it grow?
Do you cut it?
They shave everything off.
So what did you do?
Did you cut it off?
No, do you cut it off or itdoesn't grow, and that's how it
is this?
Speaker 2 (53:37):
No, it grows.
This is my actual hair.
It grows.
I just put duerag on it.
But on this show, right, welike to ask a few questions, and
the first question ismotivation or discipline?
Speaker 1 (53:55):
It has to be discipline.
For me, I think discipline getsa job.
Then Discipline is when, evenwhen you're tired, you have to
do it Together.
Results you have to do it.
Discipline is key to me.
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
Speaker 2 (54:14):
Yeah, I agree.
Speaker 1 (54:16):
If you're not disciplined, trust me, like
motivation can motivate you, butif you, it's not going to make
you do the work as early aspossible, because you're going
to work on your own time.
But discipline is being havingbreakfast at eight in the
morning and making sure you havebreakfast at eight in the
morning to get something done.
But motivation you're going tohave breakfast, you can choose
(54:38):
to have it at 11.
And that's like three hoursbehind you.
And don't forget time is money,time is everything.
The more your time is beingtaken off, your lifespan is also
being taken away from you.
Speaker 2 (54:51):
Fantastic, yeah.
And then the other one is thebest personal development book
that you've ever.
Speaker 1 (55:00):
Maybe two.
Okay, I think there's a book Idon't really remember the author
I think I had I don't remember,but a friend gifted to me and
I'm not really good at readingbooks.
To be honest with you, I'm notreally a book person.
Speaker 2 (55:16):
Maybe you should do audio books.
Speaker 1 (55:17):
Yes, I love audio books.
Yeah, audio books.
Yes, driving, listening topeople podcast I love that a lot
about sitting up to read books.
Trust me, the next five minutesI'm sleeping.
I'm not going to lie about it,but that's me.
That has always been me.
Speaker 2 (55:35):
Yeah, that has always been me.
Yeah and Bivé, what's your?
What's the best advice you everhad?
Speaker 1 (55:44):
Keep doing what you're doing and the right
people will fish you out.
That has been my ever Keepdoing what you're doing.
And the right people will fishyou out.
Yeah, nice.
That's nice, it all started whenI, when I started styling here
(56:04):
in Ghana, I was so depressed.
There are a lot of times that Ihad wanted to even stop this
and go back to corporate andit's for real.
So there was this lady, um,alessia Andreina, out.
She doesn't even know theimpact she has had on me.
Um, since that time, I thinkit's been.
If my son is five, I think I'mgoing to be five.
(56:25):
Um, I think the past four years, I think that's what has really
helped me.
So I got really depressedbecause there were a lot of
competitors in the market thenand she, she people were like
you don't do a lot ofaccessories compared to like the
other stylists we have, cause Iwas thinking my, my, my way of
(56:48):
styling people is more relatablethan editorial.
I don't know if you get whatI'm saying, because we're in
styling.
We have a lot of sections.
We have the editorial looks andthen we have the personal,
personal styling.
I think my forte is more intopersonal styling.
How people look on a daily basematters to me than on the red
(57:10):
carpet.
Right, that we matter redcarpet, I don't really.
It's an occasional stuff, ormaybe editorials, but I really
want people to have thisconfidence in their everyday
life.
That is for me.
I think that was my market.
So I complained to her.
I was like Sandra, like I feelI'm not doing well in what I was
(57:31):
doing, like I was so depressedand she was like we will need
Keep doing what you're doing andthe right people will fish you
out.
Four years down the lane, Ireally want to turn care for
using that to talk to me,because I had made up my mind
that I was going to go back intocorporate.
(57:53):
But here I am now, so happy I'mserving a lot of people, having
a lot of testimonies fromclients, helping them begin
their confidence and all that.
It's very much of a ministryfor me, because had it not been
that I had left, I had left thisjourney, what would have been
(58:16):
the story by now?
So I have been doing what Iknow how to do best and through
that, by the grace of God, I'vebeen able to attract the right
crowd, the right people.
Speaker 2 (58:27):
They are fishing you.
Yes, that's amazing.
That's amazing to hear.
Speaker 1 (58:30):
Yes.
Speaker 2 (58:32):
But, wow, thank you so much.
I think it's been an awesomeconversation and then I hope
that our listeners and ourviewers are going to learn how
to do their personal brandingand things like that, and those
that need you will contact you.
But I've learned a lot.
I've learned a lot.
Speaker 1 (58:52):
And thanks for having me.
Speaker 2 (58:53):
You're absolutely welcome.
Thank you for your time today.
Honestly, I appreciate it.
All right connected minds.
We'll speak to you guys anothertime.
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