Insights, Numerology & Letting Go with Hallie Young & Nicole Cato

Send us a text

Join in this week with a round table talk with my faves! So much great insight and different perspectives.

This episode revolves around the themes of personal growth and the importance of celebrating small victories as we enter a new year. The hosts discuss numerology's impact on self-awareness and identity shifts, emphasizing the need to break free from limiting beliefs while fostering mindful habits and realistic goal-setting.

• Embracing the concept of endings as new beginnings 
• The significance of personal reflections in areas of our lives 
• Understanding how limiting beliefs hold people back 
• Celebrating small victories and their cumulative impact 
• Developing realistic habits and self-talk strategies 
• The transformative journey of personal empowerment and growth 
• Encouraging listeners to reset their mindset anytime and anywhere

Thank you for joining me today. Please know that this podcast and the information shared is not to replace or supplement any mental health or personal wellness modalities provided by practitioners. It’s simply me, sharing my personal experiences and I appreciate you respecting and honoring my story and my guests. If something touched your heart please feel free to like, share and subscribe. Have a beautiful day full of gratitude, compassion and unconditional love.

Episode Transcript

Speaker 1 (00:03):
What's up everyone?
Welcome to this episode ofCrystal Clear.
I'm excited to have my firstlike I'm just going to say it,
threesome podcast.

Speaker 2 (00:13):
I didn't know, that's what you were going to say.

Speaker 1 (00:16):
It's a rectangle table Anyway so we have Mrs
Hallie Pilot Young and NicoleCato, who are former guests of
mine for their individualpodcast, but this could either
be a shit show, a magicalexperience, or a little bit of
all of the above.
We're excited to be here tochit, chat and just share all

(00:37):
the things, all the things.
It's a new year, it's a newvibe.
We're going to talk about thelittle wins, the big wins,
overcoming obstacles andpersonal, like you know, whether
you're a resolution kind ofperson, or you're just a wing it
and let it flow and surrenderkind of person.
We're just going to kind of gothrough and have an open
conversation today.
So welcome, ladies.

Speaker 2 (01:01):
Even just listening to you describe that, I'm like,
if we wanted to, this could besix hours long.
Oh, I know, it could absolutelybe six hours, and we would
forget we were being filmed.

Speaker 1 (01:10):
So that's the thing Right, which you do anyway, I
try to forget like it's all notthere.
Honestly, some of our bestconversations.

Speaker 3 (01:16):
I'm like man.
We should have filmed that.

Speaker 2 (01:19):
Every time Crystal and I talk on the phone we're
like this could have been anepisode, I know.

Speaker 1 (01:23):
Seriously.
So yeah, ladies welcome.
How are you?
How are your holidays?
What's in store for you for2025?
Let's just start there.
What's our vision here?

Speaker 3 (01:36):
Yeah, so I feel like the ending of 2024 was a nine
year for me so those of you thatdon't follow astrology nine
years like finishing of tyingends of things, and it was a
slow year and so I kind of feltlike a big finish.
I anticipated a big finish fora nine year, but I felt like the
the bow on it was figuring out.

(02:00):
I have to do like an identityshift, so not to get too deep
too fast.

Speaker 1 (02:05):
No, I love it, let's go, I'm all in.

Speaker 3 (02:07):
So after nine comes one and so and that's changed.
So I felt like my guides slowedme down a lot at the end of
last year and I almost felt likesomething was slowing me down
and so I just kind of went withit and was like, okay, I'm
slowing down and I was like thepeople that will understand will
understand, and those thatdon't, they're on their path

(02:30):
Eventually.
Maybe one day they'llunderstand.
But I didn't do a lot inDecember, to be honest.
I did like the traditionalstuff with my kids because I
want for them, but a lot of theextra stuff like I didn't have
my traditional cookie Christmasparty and I just kind of was in
my little cocoon, you know,outside of like my immediate
family, and so I feel likecoming up is a big shift.

(02:53):
So I felt like maybe that waspreparation for that.

Speaker 1 (02:56):
Well, and I think too , it gives us time to slow down,
to soak it in.
Because when we're going andwe're doing, and we're doing all
these things, even thetraditional things why are we
doing the traditional things?

Speaker 3 (03:10):
Are we doing it because we've always done it, or
are we?

Speaker 1 (03:12):
doing it because we really enjoy doing it.

Speaker 3 (03:14):
Don't you catch yourself sometimes in the
traditional thing Like what am Idoing?
Oh, we were totallynon-traditional this year and
we'll get there.

Speaker 1 (03:19):
But yeah, a hundred percent because it's just almost
like repetitive Right, it's ahabit.
Yeah, 100%, because it's justalmost like repetitive Right.

Speaker 3 (03:25):
It's a habit.
Yeah, so yeah, I'm excited foryou.

Speaker 1 (03:28):
I love that you had a slow year, an intentional year,
and you have two little ones.
What are they?
Two and six.

Speaker 3 (03:33):
Yes, two and seven.

Speaker 2 (03:35):
Two and seven.

Speaker 1 (03:36):
So I mean it's not an easy stage of life.

Speaker 3 (03:40):
A lot of emotions a lot of big feelings, a lot of
to-dos.
Santa is still a big.
The elf on the shelf which waslike I resisted for so long, but
here he is.

Speaker 1 (03:50):
I remember those days when there were three expecting
elf on the shelf and you'd wakeup in the morning and just like
throw it across the room.

Speaker 3 (03:57):
I was sick during December, and so the elf was
sick and Savannah was like hehasn't moved or she hasn't moved
in four days, and I was likeshe's sick too.
It's contagious.

Speaker 1 (04:06):
It's like you know, see, I love that for you and
we'll get into a little morenumerology maybe how I can brief
us on that in a little bit.
I know, I'm like, yeah, and Iwas reading my mind.
All right, let's do it.

Speaker 2 (04:19):
Let's hear Well, I love that in a nine year last
year which is, like you said,about endings, and now you're in
a one which is new beginnings.
But universally, 2025 isanother nine year.

Speaker 1 (04:27):
I know I'm like, so I'm getting here You're going to
have a slow new beginning, aslow one which I'm okay with.

Speaker 3 (04:32):
Yeah, maybe it's just process time.
Yes, right, it's intentional.

Speaker 2 (04:37):
And for people who have no idea what we're talking
about, you get so 2024 was aneight year, because you add up
two plus zero, plus two plusfour, and then you keep adding
the digits, basically until theyreduce to a single one.
So if it added up to 10, youwould add, then one plus zero
and you would get one.
You keep going until it gets asingle digit.
I was trying to explain this toJake and he's like you're not

(04:59):
explaining this very well.
So you know, yeah, if you writeit down on paper, it makes
sense.
So last year was an eight year,universally.
This is for all of us.
Now we're in a nine year, whichis about endings, but I think
people hear endings and they'relike oh God, I'm scared, like
what's going to end?
Yeah, like they associate anegative with it, but it's not
it doesn't have to be bad Likeyou don't have to label the
endings as good or bad.

(05:19):
It could be a great thing thatsome things like what if the
things that are ending arethings that no longer serve you
and that probably is what'shappening patterns or core
beliefs, or relationships andthings yes, exactly things that
no longer serve you exactlyright.
So you know, now we're allcollectively in a nine year, but
then we all have our ownindividual years, which is you
add up the digits of the currentyear again, but then also with

(05:40):
your birth date.
So I know, I I feel like mybest friends.
I know everybody's numerologyyears, like Crystal's in a six
year this year.

Speaker 1 (05:48):
I'm one year behind you.

Speaker 3 (05:52):
Starting off with a threesome.

Speaker 2 (05:53):
Sorry.

Speaker 1 (05:59):
Empowerment podcast season.
I'm telling you, yeah.

Speaker 2 (06:02):
Yeah.
But I mean like when I look atyou I'm like okay, cool, like I
get like a preview of like myyear because I'm one year behind
you, so I'm in a five year thisyear, and so last year I was in
a four, and so four is allabout.
It's the grind, it's hard work.

Speaker 1 (06:16):
It's laying the foundation, it's building the
system, oh my God.

Speaker 2 (06:48):
No-transcript have to be careful with that in a four
year, because it can lead tohealth issues if you're working
so hard that you just burnyourself out.
Yeah, and I feel like you alsodid a great job of that in your
four year, because it was theyear that you really debuted
crystal clear.
But you were very careful inthe beginning to be like, okay,
but it's not going to be aworkhorse thing, it's going to

(07:09):
be a passion.
Yeah.
I'm going to enjoy it.
I'm not going to do it because Ihave to Right Um, yeah.
So now I'm in a five year whichis change, um, and I love
change, like I feel like a lotof people hate change and I
fully embrace change.
So, yeah, big changes in life,desire for freedom, that's kind
of the theme of my year.

(07:29):
I feel like big changes arecoming and I totally welcome
them, embrace them and goingback to, you know, not labeling
them as good or bad.
Yeah, just accepting,surrendering, embracing Love,
that yeah, whatever it is, youknow, bring it on, and then
we'll adapt and celebrate orwe'll navigate, you know, if
it's not what you planned.
But I think having goals andhaving expectations are two very

(07:55):
different things.

Speaker 1 (07:56):
Very different, and I think that that's where society
gets a lot of things twisted,because I think generationally
we're releasing a lot ofexpectations from generational
stuff or family stuff orwhatever, and then trying to
come in, but I still find myselfsetting expectations for myself

(08:17):
all the time yes, I'll get alittle bit more to that.
So what is six year?
So that's my year this year, soI'm in a six and a nine, so I'm
ending something.
But what is six year, so that'smy year this year, so I'm in a
six and a nine, so I'm endingsomething.

Speaker 2 (08:27):
But what is six?
I always I forget six.
Six is there's a focus onresponsibility, but there's a
focus on like home life, familylife, like very family centric.

Speaker 1 (08:35):
Okay, and also finishing.
I thought that was five.

Speaker 2 (08:37):
No, no, five is big changes, you know, kind of like
that desire for freedom whichmakes sense, sense for you.
You travel to places you'venever been to.
Yeah, yeah, in peru, italy.

Speaker 1 (08:47):
Yeah, I actually looked at my vision board that
we made last year.

Speaker 2 (08:51):
I did all of it, yeah I mean, it was a freaking giant
llama with machu picchu in themiddle and I'm like, right there
, the only thing was egypt.

Speaker 1 (08:58):
But I'm pretty sure we're doing that this year so
that's exciting, that's so yeah,that's like.
Matt's bucket list trip.
So six is family andresponsibility.

Speaker 2 (09:05):
Yeah, and also finishing old projects, so I'm
excited to see what comes backfor you what?

Speaker 1 (09:12):
resurfaces for you in your sixth year.

Speaker 2 (09:14):
I like that yeah like maybe something you started,
and then you were like oh, Ihaven't done this in a while or
I forgot about that.

Speaker 1 (09:19):
Right, yeah, retreats it could be.

Speaker 3 (09:21):
Yeah, it goes back to like what you were saying
earlier, like your perspectiveof that Right Totally change
this year.
Right yeah, On what family timemeans.
I like that.
I like that Well honestly.

Speaker 1 (09:33):
I mean, I feel that shift.
Our oldest is going to college,right?
Yeah, our youngest is supposedto be going to kindergarten and
the other two are in high school.
So it's like what does thatmean?
And I think I've been pondering, like, do I put him in regular
school or do I put him in likefreedom, feral school, where he
can free spirited children,which he definitely is?

(09:55):
Like it's going to be astruggle to get him to go back
to preschool in my day.
Um, so I see that.
So maybe something's changingin my dynamic.
And, um, it's funny, my lifecoach is I haven't talked to her
in two weeks, just from theholidays, and we got into bed
last night and I was like Ithink I want to quit my job and
I think I want to be like.
And Matt's like are you okay?

(10:17):
I'm like, I'm not really goingto quit my job.

Speaker 2 (10:20):
I really love my job and I wouldn't want anyone else
to do my job, and I'm like youknow what?

Speaker 1 (10:23):
It's Thursday and I haven't had a Kathy call in two
weeks and I think I'm justdumping on you right now and
that's okay.
He's like can I just have a hug?

Speaker 2 (10:30):
Yeah, can I?
I think, that's actually what Ineed to.
I think I really just need aphysical touch.

Speaker 1 (10:41):
Yeah, right, because I got home and I took a podcast
on this.
I put up four Christmas treesthis year in my home, from 14
feet all the way to 8 feet BigChristmas trees.

Speaker 3 (10:49):
It's not just a minute.

Speaker 1 (10:50):
Christmas tree, it's not a little arrangement, but
yesterday I took most of themdown and it felt so good to take
them down, although I had afour-year-old be like why are
you doing that?
Why are you taking it away?
Why are you taking it away?
Why are you putting it away?
It's still Christmas.
Like he just doesn't understand.
There's still.
Christmas stuff everywhere, andso apparently I need to wait
until UTC knocks it all downright.

Speaker 3 (11:12):
That's the official.
Then go back.

Speaker 1 (11:14):
But I felt so good to just start fresh and have my
house back, and then I'm like ofcourse I'm like, ooh, I think'm
going to make a new seatingarea over here and I'm like,
wrapped up in, like designing anew seating area, yeah, so just
forcing myself to kind of slowdown and be in the moment.
So I love that six isresponsibility and family time,

(11:35):
and maybe what the change ofthat might look like.
Yeah, I think that I'm lookingforward to embracing that and
diving a little deeper into that.

Speaker 2 (11:42):
Yeah, it's like a focus on the home life.
You know which is good?

Speaker 1 (11:50):
Yeah, I think it's going to be a really grounding
year for you, yeah, yeah, I feellike five was too.
Honestly, I feel like, eventhough there was a lot of travel
, I allowed myself to be inthose moments and not like
constantly swirling about.
I should have, I could, Istopped, shoulda, woulda coulda
myself.

Speaker 3 (12:07):
I felt like you were very mindful too about leading
up to it, not putting too muchin front of your trips and then
coming back trying as much asyou could to cushion, I know
from a board meeting came backto board meetings family,
shareholder meetings and likeall the things.
Yeah, then it was chill yeahhonestly, we had had a very low
key Thanksgiving.

Speaker 1 (12:28):
Very low key intentional holiday.
We did things very differentthis year and I think that you
know that's been one of thethings and maybe it'll just lead
into a new conversation herebut really accepting that things
are changing.
You know, my grandfather is 83.
I haven't seen him in a while.
I need to manage to get my wayup to Tallahassee but, like my,

(12:51):
we usually go to my in-laws forChristmas Eve.
We didn't do that this year.
I hosted at my house and youknow, just realizing that we
really love our intimate timewith our kids and just what does
that look like?
Going forward and being okaywith being like the first person
to do it differently oraccepting that things are going
to be done differently andhonoring the fact that it was
the last Christmas and holidaywith all of the family in the

(13:13):
house, without a kid gone.
Mind you, he's my bonus son.
I didn't give birth to a childthat's 18 years old Right.

Speaker 2 (13:22):
But I didn't start that young.

Speaker 1 (13:23):
Right, thank goodness .
So yeah, I think it's just alot of acceptance for me.
This year.
I'm like, oh, it's going to beall about empowerment, but I
think it was a lot more.
2025 for me was a lot more oflike surrender flow and
accepting than like gung ho asempowerment was, and that was

(13:44):
more of like the four year yeahso, as you said, year five is
what changed.
yeah, and so that would thatthat flows.
Actually, if it's like the fouris the grind year, it was all
about the empowerment I do do do, but still finding my being
part, and I will.
I will say that I've recentlyfeel like I'm I'm like itching,

(14:07):
like something is nudging me todive deeper into my spiritual
practices and my mindfulnesstime and just have my like B
time and I think that was partof the whole conversation last
night.
I'm like I don't have that, butjust getting back into a
routine, finding making thattime for myself.
It's not like you're just goingto find it on a shelf Like I

(14:27):
need to carve that out and makeit.

Speaker 3 (14:29):
Be intentional about it, yeah.

Speaker 2 (14:31):
This was.
This was a conversation I hadwith Jake and this is, I feel,
like a perfect segue to talkabout, like starting fresh in a
new year and like do you setresolutions?
Do you not Right the habits?
Because he is such a you can'teven call it a routine.
He's got this morning ritualand it's just like part of his
brain like wakes up, doesn't goon his phone, goes and drinks a

(14:51):
big glass of water with likevitamin D and vitamin K drops in
it.
Whatever goes and does like a15 minute stretch prayer
meditation routine.
Like it's amazing.

Speaker 1 (14:58):
It's really amazing.
Then works out.

Speaker 2 (14:59):
Yeah, and he.
But he doesn't even.
It's not even likeno-transcript on the beach and I

(15:33):
was reading it.
I'm like I'm so cliche rightnow.

Speaker 1 (15:36):
I didn't start before the new year.

Speaker 2 (15:38):
I will say it was like the last week of 2024.
But I think, even with myspiritual practice, I was
noticing if I wasn't making timeto do it, it wasn't happening,
and I always feel better when Ido it.

Speaker 1 (15:51):
It's like anything.

Speaker 2 (15:51):
It's like making your bed, it's like a workout, but,
like for me, every time I do itI get deeper and deeper into my
spiritual practice and into myconnection with the universe and
every time I do it I'm like I'mso glad I did this right, and
so now I just I'm on like a 10day hot streak, so we're going
to keep it going.
But I wake up, I don't grab myphone, I just get up, brush my

(16:13):
teeth, whatever, wash my face,and then I go into my little Zen
den office and lay on theground and I meditate and I
journal and I do my cards andwhatever it is, and I get my oil
disco ball essential oildiffuser turned on.
Yeah.

Speaker 3 (16:27):
And all my Hallie things.
I saw that in your story.

Speaker 2 (16:30):
I love it, but it feels.
It feels so good to not have itbe a thought anymore.
And then I feel like also notbeing unrealistic about it and
Jake helped me a lot because I,you and I are very similar in
this way, like very all ornothing, like very extreme or
like nothing, and I feel likeI'm specifically talking about

(16:50):
like workouts, eating healthy,you know.
So, like with workouts in mymind, if I wasn't doing like an
hour, I wasn't doing anything.
And Jake's like no, I do, yousee me, I do like 20 minutes
every day and I come backdripping in sweat and I'm like,
oh, you're right.
I come back dripping in sweatand I'm like, oh, you're right.
And because I think the morethat you are unrealistic about
those habits, your rituals, yourroutines you're only setting
yourself up to then feel likeshit about yourself when you

(17:13):
don't meet them Because.
How could you meet them?
Because?
they're not realistic, like whohas two and a half hours every
single morning to do all thesethings.
So just making it realistic hasalready been helpful for me.
And I don't know it takes a lotof like identity shifting, like
you were talking about, likechanging your core beliefs of
like I have to if I'm gonna workout.

(17:36):
It has to be for x amount oftime or I'm not worthy or
whatever the core belief is likewhatever the the deep, deep
core belief from your childhoodis like I'm not gonna be loved
if I can't prove that I achievedthis thing or whatever it is,
and so I feel like that is goingto be a big part of my change
in 2025, too, is undoing some ofthose stories and genuinely

(17:56):
understanding and believing that, yes, hallie, 15 minutes of
working out if that's all youhave time for that day is better
than doing nothing.
Oh, a hundred percent, yes, Ahundred percent.
Yes, so that's where I'm at inmy routine.

Speaker 1 (18:11):
Yeah, I love that and I I can definitely relate, I
know, on all the things.
Exercise is one thing, though,like I'm always all, like I
can't ever do nothing, andthat's just a psychotic core
belief I have.
But it's also a physical, like Ijust have to move my body.
I'm a mover.

(18:31):
Like have you ever done thelife languages?
Yes, oh, life languages.
It's like I'm a moverinfluencer responder.
Oh, my God, I need to do that.
Yes, I'll send it to you.
So it's interesting.
I'm a mover influencerresponder, but those three have
gone in different order over thedifferent stages of my life, so
I have to honor that because Iknow that it will come out in

(18:54):
other ways.
And so that's kind of what theconversation was like last night
when I was like you know, Ifeel like I'm not there, and
Matt's like well, you, your jobis community outreach, so your
job is to be out in thecommunity.
Like you don't have to be causeI feel like something within me
is pressuring myself to go sitin the office for all this

(19:14):
period of time and.
I'm like, but what would Ireally do?
Like, my job is committeemeetings and, you know,
organizing events and all theseother things, and it's like and
the, the guilt and the shame andthe ego creeping in.

Speaker 2 (19:24):
Right, but I'm doing that.

Speaker 3 (19:26):
And he's like no one shames me, Like you're doing
this to yourself, I'm like, I'maware.

Speaker 1 (19:29):
I'm doing it to myself, but it's a perfect
example of it's.
Like it doesn't have to be allor nothing, like I don't have to
be sitting in a desk for fourhours a week that way.
That's why I've never had acorporate job before.
So it's honoring A our capacity.
B setting realistic goals.
I know as a remote worker, Ihave to carve out hours in the

(19:54):
day to actually get my job done.
Otherwise I will be floatingout in space or exercising or
walking, or I will skip myresponsibilities to do the
things that like, the fluffythings that are easy for me and
that come naturally to me.
So I think that you know in therealm of this for our listeners
, like when you're setting goalsfor yourself or resolutions or

(20:17):
whatever the hell you want tocall them, just be realistic and
really celebrate the littlewins too.
Like just do one thing everyday to get you to where your end
goal is Like.
If I don't want my emails topile up, I need to carve out
some time to get through themall, answer them all, because
I'm historical for readingemails at a stoplight and never

(20:39):
following through because Iforget about it in three hours,
right, thank goodness.
For talk to text.
I do a lot of that, although Iread it back sometimes and I'm
like I'm not sure this AI isreally AI.

Speaker 2 (20:53):
Now I just have to do it way over again.

Speaker 1 (20:55):
Yeah and so, yeah, so really just setting realistic,
like what works for you and likethat one thing every day to get
you to whatever the goals are,and it doesn't have to be one
thing, it can be multiple things.

Speaker 2 (21:09):
Yeah, you know like a 15 minute walk or stretching
Something.
Yeah, whatever, yeah whateverit is.

Speaker 3 (21:16):
To like with the all or nothing and the one thing a
day.
Somewhere we got convinced thatit is all or nothing, and so if
I can't do what my future selfwants to do, all of it today.
Then we get tired of it, right,like it's emotionally
exhausting.
But if I can do one thingtomorrow that gets me closer to

(21:39):
where I want to be, like that'sprogress.
And we've kind of lost that.
And I think, going back to likethe nine year and in finishing
and endings I had to end a lotof limiting beliefs to create
new ones, and so that was like awhole.
I mean it's been years but lastyear was really big on like

(21:59):
finding what are those limitingbeliefs?
Because I think that sometimesis our obstacle in starting new
things or starting new habits isI can't do this or I've never
been able to do it before, sowhy can't?

Speaker 1 (22:10):
I do it now.
I'm not a morning person I'mnot an evening person.

Speaker 2 (22:13):
Creating an identity that enforces the opposite of
what you're trying to do, andit's hard work.

Speaker 3 (22:17):
And I think I would look at people I admire talk
about identity shifts orchanging yourself and was like,
well, this is what they did.
And I couldn't do that exactly.
So I was like I would getfrustrated and then I'd fall
back into.
You know, you fall back ondefault when you can't do what
you want to do.
But you know, I'm just cause wedo work out.

(22:38):
I'm like I didn't get up tosquatting what I did because I
started that day and was likeone day I'll be able to lift it.
You start small and then youget there.
So it's like kind of the samementality when you're changing
your identity, you have to spenda lot of time internally and
we're not built that way today,in today's world.
No, we have so many externaldistractions, if you start your

(23:09):
day on social media, you'reimmediately confirming all of
your limiting beliefs.
Probably I don't look like thatlife.
I don't look.
Yes, I'm not listening to myhigher self, I'm not connected
to myself, and I think for me wetalked about journaling last
time.
For me, journaling, I had tostop saying this is exactly what
I want my dream life.
Journaling, like I had to stopsaying this is what, exactly
what I want my dream life tolook like, because I had a hard
time defining that and so Iwould battle with myself, and so

(23:29):
it was like I wasn't gettinganywhere because I couldn't
define a vision, but I coulddefine qualities Right, so I had
to kind of like take a stepback and say, like well,
regardless of what I want, Ihave to focus on what that
future vision feels like.

Speaker 2 (23:44):
Right, right, like feelings, feelings, it feels
like freedom and empowerment andworthy and okay, yeah.

Speaker 3 (23:53):
So I had to change.
And for me, changing identity Irecently kind of gone through
this in December is like myself-talk and-talk and I was not
big on affirmations.
I was like these don't work.
But for me recentlyaffirmations have been big
because if I don't do them I amletting my subconscious run wild

(24:13):
and my subconscious talk I meanit's not, it's full of my
roommate.
Yeah, it's like telling me Ican't do this and I can't.
Your roommate is your ego forthis.
I'll look up that book.
But um, got my room.
My ego was telling me, likeyou're, you have lived 38 years
and you haven't done this before.

(24:34):
You haven't felt worthy, youhaven't felt, you know,
righteous or holy or any ofthese things.
So, stepping into that, like,okay, we'll try that.
But then you start to.
I feel like you get tests.
The first, within like thefirst couple of weeks, you
decide to start out on a newpath and it's like those are
tests because it's like well,how sure are you that you want
to continue in this?

(24:55):
And I also think our bodies andthis world are, they get
accustomed to feelings and soit's like you've felt this way
for so long, because it doesn'tdifferentiate whether your
feelings are good or bad, itjust knows.
This is the feeling you've hadfor 38 years, and now you want
to change that.
And so your body is like tryingto protect you until like, no,

(25:17):
no, no, you don't want to dothat.
We've always done this Right.

Speaker 1 (25:22):
Yes, that's when we get into certain relationship
patterns or have a tendency topull from comfort zone, even
though it's usually notcomfortable at all Right.
I shouldn't say it's notcomfortable, it's not like
settling you always see thosememes that pop up.

Speaker 2 (25:41):
Your nervous system feels good around X, y and Z,
like butterflies aren't a goodthing, like ooh okay yeah okay,
oh wow, thanks for telling menow, but not the way it's
supposed to it all works out theway it's supposed to, yeah, but
like back to what you weresaying about, just like, when
you're not that like, we'vealways done it this way and
you're going to be this way.
I was listening to, um, mymentor, even though she doesn't

(26:04):
know it, gabby Bernstein, her,her podcast, the other day,
talking about, like, why yourmanifestations aren't happening
and, um, you know, it's becauseyou have a core belief that
doesn't align with what you'retrying to whatever put out into
the world.
And a good tool, I feel like,for that.
Um, something she mentioned isyou know, if you're, if you're
trying to rework a core believer, an old story, and then your

(26:28):
ego creeps in like Nope, that'stoo good to be true, you can't
change it.
She's like, literally, justlike, snap the rubber band and
be like I forgive the fear and Iforgive the judgment and I'm
willing to see this differently.
Like that statement.
I was like wow that works.
Like, I choose to forgive thefear, and I choose to forgive
the judgment or whatever it is.
I forgive the lack mentality.

(26:48):
I forgive the victim mentality,whatever it is.
I'm willing to see thisdifferently.
It's just like a huge shift.
Wow, I love that.

Speaker 1 (26:56):
I mean even being aware that it's your ego too is
progress, and that was a hugething.
Going back to the roommateMichael Singer was a really
great book.
Eckhart Tolle, very greatauthor for references for
understanding like deeper inside, like what the ego is.

Speaker 2 (27:12):
Versus your actual, true self.

Speaker 1 (27:14):
Yes, and then I talk about this a lot Like is it my
false self that's wanting tohave this conversation right now
, or is it my true self?
And anytime you feel victimizedor you feel like blaming
someone or your feelings gethurt, you have to.
Really, you know I you don'thave to, but I encourage you to

(27:35):
take a step back.
What?

Speaker 3 (27:37):
is it about me that is hurt about this?

Speaker 1 (27:39):
Is hurt right now.
And going back to the wementioned this in our last
podcast the nonviolentcommunication book.
Like what is coming aliveinside of me right now Because
it has nothing to do with theoutside source.

Speaker 2 (27:48):
Right Like what part of me.

Speaker 1 (27:50):
What is this part?

Speaker 2 (27:51):
that was so offended by it.
Like it's not me, it's part ofme.

Speaker 3 (27:54):
I could be in a situation and be so heartbroken,
and the same situation happenedto y'all and you think nothing
of it.

Speaker 2 (28:00):
Yeah, because we're excited, right, yeah, yeah.

Speaker 3 (28:03):
Because it is literally our perception, our
viewpoint, our ego coming intoit, going no, this thing has
hurt us in the past, so we're weknow now.
Yeah, this is bad, yeah.

Speaker 1 (28:14):
Yeah, a great example of that is I have a girlfriend
and we were talking about thingsand she, you know, she got very
upset because someone canceledplans on her.
And I'm like, if someonecancels plans on me, I'm like
freedom, don't you worry aboutit, exactly, oh, I'm so sorry,
I'm like.

Speaker 3 (28:32):
you don't have to explain anything.

Speaker 2 (28:33):
I enjoy the downtime and it's happening for a reason
Like enjoy whatever else youhave going on or you're sick or
whatever.

Speaker 1 (28:40):
So that's just a perfect, just something that
happens to every one example ofjust let it go and not taking it
personally.

Speaker 2 (28:47):
And I talk about this all the time.

Speaker 1 (28:50):
But if we can not personalize other people's stuff
.
It's a huge way to allow theego to just back off.

Speaker 2 (28:58):
Yeah, mel Robbins just came up with a new book
about this.

Speaker 3 (29:01):
Yes.

Speaker 2 (29:01):
Yeah.

Speaker 1 (29:08):
About her let them.
I love the let them theory.
Yes, I am so excited to readthat book and that's one of the
examples she uses.

Speaker 2 (29:10):
I mean oh is it?
Yeah, Like if someone, if yourfriends do something and they
don't invite you.
Okay, let them Right.
You know like if you want yourhusband to whatever start biking
with you, cause like biking hedoesn't want to like, let him
you know, like just let them.

Speaker 3 (29:22):
Yeah, I went through a whole thing last year he will
not do it, but I gotta let it goit's like oh yeah, like

Speaker 2 (29:31):
sometimes we're guilty of wanting to like
control our partner or like wantthem to be more like us or
whatever, and sometimes like youneed to just let them yeah do
their thing.

Speaker 1 (29:40):
That was 100.
What helped my relationshipsettle is when we started to
realize that, like letting yoube you, yeah, let him be him.
His journey is different thanmine.
That's okay, right.

Speaker 3 (29:52):
My kids.

Speaker 1 (29:54):
Let them be them, and that's where I think I struggle
.

Speaker 2 (29:56):
Yes.

Speaker 1 (29:58):
Oh, you're yes.

Speaker 3 (29:59):
Yeah.

Speaker 1 (30:00):
Getting yelled at about the Christmas.

Speaker 2 (30:02):
I'm like I'm going to let you be you.

Speaker 1 (30:03):
Yeah, I'm sensing a lot of resistance from Laura
right now, and maybe you just godo something else.
A lot of resistance.

Speaker 2 (30:09):
Brody, you're at a low vibe right now.
You're at a low vibe, yeah.

Speaker 1 (30:13):
High vibe, but in a different direction than I was.

Speaker 3 (30:15):
Yeah, yeah, right, right, I went through a whole
thing last year with a group ofacquaintances that I thought
were nice acquaintances.
We were not friendlyacquaintances, right, like
honestly I thought we werefriends, yeah, just to be
totally vulnerable.
And they started this wholerumor about me.
That was going on for like ayear and I didn't know about it
until someone told me.

(30:36):
And do we want to say what therumor was?

Speaker 1 (30:38):
No.

Speaker 3 (30:40):
Because I don't want it to keep you alive.

Speaker 1 (30:41):
I know I didn't know who wanted it out there.

Speaker 3 (30:44):
Oh my God, Tell me later yeah.
But it was nasty against me andmy marriage and I realized very
quickly they were not myfriends.
Yeah, and it was so painful andit was so hurtful and I old me,

(31:04):
many versions of me would havelashed out and created lots of
chaos and been like who said Imean, I would have ripped down
walls trying to find out wherethis came from.
Yes, but then I was, like, whatam I defend?
Like this isn't true at all.
So like, what am I?
What are you defending?
Exactly right and true.
Also knowing, like, where yourattention goes, your energy
flows, like, is this where isthis really where you want?
your energy, like no, I don'twant to put any energy towards

(31:27):
this, I just want all of this toend.
And going back to the all ornothing mentality, I was like I
said I'm not talking to any ofthem anymore, I'm done like, and
my husband, who was kind ofironic that he said this, but
anyway he was like you don'thave to be all like, they can be
acquaintances and that's it.
Like you don't right.

(31:48):
Yes, like, because it's yourpiece like whatever you're
comfortable with, you don't.
You don't have to explainanything to them or explain why
you suddenly aren't checking inevery day or doing this or that
or you know whatever, andthey're a part of my life that I
can't get away from.
So it's been challenging, butthe let them theory is like

(32:08):
they're coming after me becauseof their own stuff.
And that's hard to realize,especially if you're not in a
self-development journey.
But accepting and surrenderingto it was like.
But accepting and surrenderingto it was like I don't really
care what they, you know it'sfreeing, it is freeing.
It's like go ahead.
And then I quickly realizedthey're just going to move on to

(32:29):
the next rumor.
So like, the more you justsurrender to it, the more
quickly they can move on to thenext person.

Speaker 1 (32:35):
Yeah, you know and realize it's their own stuff,
like yeah, I mean the three ofus talk all the time.
I don't think we've ever had aconversation about another human
no, never.

Speaker 3 (32:47):
No, because it's never come up.
It's never.
I mean we might.

Speaker 1 (32:50):
And if we are, we're like oh, they're on their
journey, they're doing thisRight?

Speaker 3 (32:53):
Yeah, it's part of the soul contract, can you
believe Like, if anyone onestarts a conversation.
Can you believe we're like?
What year are they in?

Speaker 1 (33:02):
What's the numerology Right?
But it's like always with likeuplifting compassion and I go
back to and I've had to do thistoo Like you go back to
different stages of life andthere are people that I don't
want to totally block outbecause I love them, but I'm
just not the same person as Iwas when I was surrounded by
them all the time, and when I doget myself in situations with

(33:23):
them, it's like okay, well, Ijust I don't see that.
And it goes back to like theidentity thing, and I think one
thing that I've really workedhard on is not identifying with
any, like trying to not identifywith anything.

Speaker 2 (33:37):
Yeah.

Speaker 1 (33:38):
Try to have just like an open, clean slate, because I
feel like that allows me to bemore open to receive, because
when you start putting yourselfin little boxes, like mom, wife,
podcaster, outreach.

Speaker 3 (33:53):
It limits you.

Speaker 1 (33:54):
And that's where I think the whole like I need to
be doing this more.
I need to be.
That's where the need you feelso pulled in different
directions.

Speaker 2 (34:02):
Yeah, because you've already labeled yourself as this
thing.

Speaker 1 (34:04):
I'm a hostess, I'm hosting holidays, so I have to
make everything grandiose.
No, you really don't.
You're welcoming people intoyour home.
You don't have to be like, itdoesn't have to be all of it,
right, and I think that I'vereally.
I mean, it's a constant, it'severy day.
Stop identifying with littlethings, yeah, and it just allows

(34:24):
it to be more open and fluid,rather than I'm just moving from
one bucket to the other bucket.

Speaker 2 (34:31):
Yeah, you know.
Or setting yourself up fordisappointment when it doesn't
happen the way that you'velabeled it should happen and we
only get disappointed when wewhat Set an expectation.

Speaker 1 (34:40):
Yeah disappointed when we what Set an expectation.
So it's like and even for mykids and my family, my marriage,
my coworkers, like settingexpectations is like the most
toxic trait, because it's soself-sabotaging, because, like
most of the time, no one elseknows what our expectations are
anyway.
Like let's just face that, like, yeah, so we're doing it to

(35:03):
ourselves, yeah, and so it'sreally interesting because I
mean, we've all been around orseen, like had a teacher or a
mentor, like maybe not a mentora family member or someone that
sets crazy expectations outthere, right, and do we ever
feel like we're going to live upto them?

Speaker 3 (35:19):
No.

Speaker 1 (35:20):
Do we ever feel like we are worthy of even catching.
But where does that come from?
Like we said, it comes fromtheir own stuff.
Right, if you find that it'slike a big and this is just
something to look out for outthere.
If you have someone in yourlife that is an expectation
setter and it's like you know ithas to be this way it has to be

(35:40):
.
That is an expectation setterand it's like you know it has to
be this way, that is theirstuff.
Yeah, that is their stuff.
You are seen, you are heard,you are validated.
Let that be their stuff.
But there are a lot ofrelationships where it's very
hard because it could be aparent, it could be a spouse, it
could be a child, you know,whatever Someone in your life
you can't necessarily get awayfrom Right, but you have to

(36:00):
manage to work through it andfor me, that's been the biggest
thing is like, even for myself,like stop and I'm.
I feel like I've gotten reallygood about not setting
expectations for like life, butI obviously still do it in some
realm, but I with myself so hardoh, yeah, so hard same, so hard
to not have an expectation.
We're conditioned, at least hereto.

Speaker 3 (36:21):
we go into school and there's immediately
expectations.
You know, sit down and be quiet.
In America, I don't ever know.

Speaker 1 (36:31):
I know Because you have listeners all over the
world, I know.

Speaker 3 (36:35):
But yeah, in America we go into school at six years,
five Pre-K starts at four andthere's expectations, and so we
internalize that and we learn.
Expectations are external.
It's what somebody expects ofme versus what am I feeling?
How do I like this?
Do I like this?
Does?

Speaker 1 (36:51):
this work for me.
Does it feel good?

Speaker 3 (36:52):
It's like and you're also taught like you know as
kids, when it's like well, Idon't want to do this, I don't
want to participate, like that'sbad.

Speaker 2 (36:58):
You're bad, you're naughty.

Speaker 3 (36:59):
Yeah, yeah.

Speaker 2 (37:00):
Yeah yeah.
You're rebellious, like if youtalk in class like oh, he's too
chatty.

Speaker 3 (37:04):
Yeah, Like I think you know what that does to kids'
little.

Speaker 1 (37:06):
Right Shuts them down .
Forethroat chakras yeah, I know.

Speaker 3 (37:16):
Tatum used wow yeah, that's why she's gone in death.

Speaker 1 (37:21):
It literally closed up, I think we've all seen that
real.

Speaker 3 (37:25):
That's like the troublemakers in class are the
leaders in nature.
When the teacher takes them outin nature, I'm like yeah,
because there's no expectationout there.

Speaker 1 (37:35):
It is do what feels good and they are brave like
wild little spirits, and, yeah,I could do a whole series on
outdated systems.

Speaker 3 (37:48):
Oh yeah, yes, especially like not to get into
religion, but for me, religionwas a big part of like.
Feelings are bad, yeah, and soit was like, regardless of what
the feeling is, it's bad, so why?

Speaker 1 (37:58):
is that, though?
What's the explanation behindthat?
Because I'm not very religious.

Speaker 3 (38:02):
So one of the biggest scriptures that I was taught
from, probably like six yearsold is your heart is deceitful
above all things.
What, above all things, is yourheart is deceitful.

Speaker 1 (38:13):
That is written, yes, that's wild.

Speaker 3 (38:15):
But there's also a scripture that says from your
heart floweth your life.
So it's like-.

Speaker 1 (38:20):
So that kind of contradicts each other.

Speaker 3 (38:21):
Well, the Bible contradicts itself in a lot of
ways, which kind of was like the.
But I was always a child thatwas like does that mean Right,
but why?
And you know.
So I had big feelings as a kid,yeah, and I was taught that
those were bad Unless theyaligned with everyone around you
, right.

Speaker 2 (38:40):
Right, Stop.
Well, and that asking you weretaught that asking why is bad
too.
Yeah, Like, why does it saythis?
Why is it this?

Speaker 3 (38:45):
way Right and it was like I'm not trying to offend
anyone, I'm just genuinely, andyou got shut down and then you
had to get throat surgery as anadult.
I know I'm like they say Cainkilled Abel and then a group of
people killed them.
But like, where did the groupof people come from?
There was only Adam and Eve,cain and Abel, I don't know,
anyway, and how did the rest of?

(39:09):
the society get here, Did theyfuck their mom?
We're all related.
Okay, there was lots ofquestions, but it was like, I'm
sorry, I said it I never.

Speaker 1 (39:21):
They lost me there they lost me there.

Speaker 3 (39:24):
They lost me there, I'm out.

Speaker 1 (39:25):
No one could ever answer the question.

Speaker 3 (39:28):
But it was religion, a lot of feelings.
Feelings are bad because theycan't they can't control
feelings.
So it's like if we can beatthat out of you now I can get
you where I want you.
And I just bucked the systemthe whole way.
But I will say to peoplelistening if you can look up
abraham hicks yeah, oh, my god,god, oh yes.

Speaker 2 (39:50):
Well, that's a big.

Speaker 3 (39:54):
Thing.

Speaker 1 (39:54):
Okay, yes, because we have time.

Speaker 2 (39:56):
Oh, we're good Because we've been talking for
five hours.

Speaker 3 (39:59):
No, we're good we're in the astral realm, no, but
that's a whole new podcast.

Speaker 2 (40:05):
Yes, abraham Hicks, talk about that more.

Speaker 3 (40:07):
So for me, coming from, feelings are bad.
Shut them down to.
Feeling is what creates yourreality was like, well, wait a
minute.
And it took me months andprobably it would not take all
of you months to get to get this, but it was a lot of
conditioning that I had to breakto even listen to it.
I felt shameful.
I would listen to it in secret,like I turn it down as low as I

(40:29):
can put my headphones on, likewhat if someone finds me
listening to this?
Because it went totally againstmy religious upbringing.
But then when I startedpracticing it, I was like, but
wait, this works.
Yeah, your heart is notdeceitful.
Above all things, it's actuallywhat creates your life.

Speaker 1 (40:48):
And compassion and like where's the compassion in
that?
Like aren't we supposed?
To be like unconditionally,yeah like, but that was that's
the reason I.

Speaker 3 (40:58):
Another reason I think that things organized
stuff just doesn't click with mewell, is like there's so many
rules I'm not a big role personspiritualism your faith is very
personal so it's hard to sayyour faith has to look like this
yeah, because it is sostructured, it's like so
dichotomous.
Yeah, like there's like mywhole language.
When I came out of my 20s, mywhole language was that was was

(41:22):
what I was taught to speak.
I was like this isn't me.
This is just what I've been so.

Speaker 1 (41:28):
How do you feel now and how has that shifted for you
?

Speaker 3 (41:31):
You know, I was always called rebellious growing
up and I was because I wasn'tdoing what I was supposed to be
doing and I thought that was bad.
And that's where a lot of myshame came from was because it
was like these people said I wasbad.
But when I look back I'm likebut what I was actually doing
was bad, I was just findingmyself.

Speaker 1 (41:53):
And you were doing exactly what you're supposed to
be doing, because you wouldn'tbe here doing what you're doing
now if you hadn't done thatRight, and that's what I think
is huge for people to understand.
Like whatever part of your life, your journey, wherever you are
, it's happening the way it'ssupposed to happen.
For what's going to happen next.

Speaker 2 (42:10):
Oh my God.
Yeah, I love that you said that, because I feel like all the
time I just whether it's like myfriends or family, whatever
anybody stuck in their own head,it's like, well, what if I make
the wrong choice?

Speaker 3 (42:19):
I'm like you can't, you literally can't.
I remember when you told methat for the first time, I was
like oh yeah, that feels so good.
Yeah, yeah, you're like, butyou can't make the wrong choice.
And you're like whoa, yeah, wow, that takes a lot of pressure
off.
Yeah, it's actually a reallygood book.

Speaker 1 (42:35):
I think it's called what Should Danny Do.
It's a really good kids book,but I feel like we need one for
adults, because it starts outand it's like, okay, well, if he
makes this choice, it givesscenarios.
Well, if he makes this choice,turn to this page.
If he makes this choice turn tothis page.
If he makes this choice, turn tothis page and it shows like the
different scenarios, whether hefaces it with compassion or
faces it with, you know,resistance, and I mean the book

(43:01):
could go on forever and it iskind of long.
But I was like, oh my god,someone needs to create an adult
book like this.
It's a lot of work because backand forth, but it was really
interesting because it shows youit's okay.
In some days you're going tomake choices, or even Did you
ever feel like you have dayswhere you're rebellious against

(43:22):
yourself?
Yes, I want to do this, but youknow what I'm not going to.

Speaker 3 (43:28):
Okay.
You really showed us.

Speaker 1 (43:36):
I feel like there's a lot of times but it's like but
those days are fine and it goesback to that four agreements
book.
It's like knowing that yourbest one day is different and
like every day is going to bedifferent.
So having that grace andcompassion and unconditional
love for yourself along the wayis huge.

Speaker 2 (43:54):
Especially for women, sorry.

Speaker 3 (43:56):
No no.

Speaker 2 (43:57):
Men, okay, I'm so glad you said that, because men
are on a 24 hour cycle.
Oh yeah, Women are on a 28 to32 to 35, whatever day cycle.
So, having grace for yourselfand real like where you're at in
your different phases, yourdifferent four phases of your
cycle, I mean there's like yourovulatory phase, there's your

(44:17):
luteal phase, molecular, yourmenstrual like workouts aren't
going to look the same.

Speaker 3 (44:22):
Activities aren't going to feel the same.

Speaker 2 (44:23):
You're not going to want to schedule meetings for
certain days, like and it allgoes back to the expectations
thing Like I'm going to do thisworkout for an hour every single
day.
Well, that's actually not evengood for you.
No, it's not good for you.

Speaker 1 (44:35):
Right yeah, when I started cycle syncing and
learning more about that, whichI didn't start doing until I was
like 38 years old, this is thestuff we should be teaching our
young girls.
Yes 100% and even our men,because then they will
understand.

Speaker 3 (44:49):
Yes, the cycle.
I'm crazy certain weeks of themonth or yes.

Speaker 2 (44:59):
There are just certain weeks.

Speaker 1 (45:00):
You walk in, you give a hug, you, pat on the back,
you order takeout and you don'task any freaking questions, yeah
, yeah.
But I mean we and I think thatthis is where we can come far as
a society is educatingourselves more on these things,
because it's like going back tolike in school and like
empowering people and teachingthem what we really need and
nurturing us as humans, insteadof just like memorizing a bunch

(45:20):
of stuff yeah, yeah, I totallyagree.

Speaker 2 (45:22):
Yeah, like how to have healthy hormones, balance
your hormones, balance yournervous system.
You don't have to just likeundo all this damage right years
later because your nervoussystem.
You don't have to just likeundo all this damage years later
because your nervous system wasso like tight gripped onto
everything like fight or flightforever.

Speaker 1 (45:35):
Yeah, I mean hormones .
If everyone can learn abouthormones from a young age, they
control everything in your body,everything Like your
neurological function, yourendocrine function, everything
yeah.

Speaker 3 (45:51):
You would be more accepting of yourself.
I think you would have moregrace if you knew like,
scientifically, some things areout of my control right now.
Right, so I need to justunderstand, because sometimes
we're like, no, I need to justwork hard enough through this
feeling.

Speaker 2 (46:04):
Yeah, because your ego is like oh well, if you, if
you've started to say toyourself like well
scientifically your ego would belike well is that just an
excuse?
Are you just being crazy?
You know, yeah, a hundredpercent.

Speaker 1 (46:12):
I mean Matt and I got the brain scans.
Perfect example when we got thescience behind what was going
on in our brains individually,then as a couple.
It saved our freaking marriage.

Speaker 3 (46:23):
I did because I understood my patterns.

Speaker 1 (46:26):
He understood what was going on with him and it was
like, oh my gosh, we all of asudden had so much more grace
and compassion for each otherbecause we got to the root of it
, and I think that that and Ireally feel like right now we
have this like movement like ourgeneration is really bringing
in, like get down to the rootand the science behind it and
get the root of the issue rather, than like brushing it off, and

(46:46):
empathy for peopleunderstanding like.

Speaker 3 (46:48):
Just like I, have things that created me and my
limiting beliefs.
Others I don't know what otherpeople have been through that
caused them to react in such away that I disapprove of.

Speaker 1 (47:00):
Right or that I found offensive or I found rude Right
.
Yes, you know.
Yeah, there was a little lady.
I was at UTC.
There was a little lady behindme in traffic yesterday and the
whole row in front of me was outinto the middle of the
intersection, right.

Speaker 3 (47:14):
So they were already blocking the road.
You can't go anywhere and she'slike honking at me to go.

Speaker 1 (47:17):
I'm like, where do you want me to go?
Where am I going to go?
If I pull up, I'm going to beblocking.
We would be blocking both wayscycle.
And she's still honking.
She's still.
And I'm like, wow, she mustreally have to go potty.

Speaker 2 (47:35):
She must really have to go potty, or something
because I mean, can she clearlynot see that?

Speaker 3 (47:44):
I just I like to be a courteous driver.
Anyway, I feel like it's a carI always like to let people in.

Speaker 2 (47:48):
I like to let people get in the other way, because
I'm infamous for being thatperson in the lane that I'm like
I need to get across.

Speaker 3 (47:51):
Please let me yeah me too, rolling the window down.
Thank you, I'm like tellingSavannah, I'm like wave to them.
Your kids are great at helpingyou get through traffic.

Speaker 1 (48:00):
But I really deny her .
Yeah, but it's like I inanother life.
I would have been like, oh man,like why are you honking at me?
You know?

Speaker 2 (48:08):
what.

Speaker 1 (48:08):
I mean, or I would have pulled up and been rushing
the people in front of me Likewe weren't going anywhere.

Speaker 3 (48:13):
Right Like we weren't going anywhere.
Cow in the Parking Lot is agood book for that.
Cow in the Parking Lot yes,it's about like anger and
understanding other people's.
Specifically, traffic is kindof where the book starts off.

Speaker 1 (48:25):
I love it.
Everyone's had some sort ofroad rage incident if you're a
licensed driver, but it's reallyjust an outlet Like this
opportunity is presenting me arelease of these emotions.

Speaker 3 (48:35):
This situation isn't really the problem.

Speaker 1 (48:37):
Right.

Speaker 3 (48:38):
It's all the stuff I have.
It's coming alive in me.

Speaker 1 (48:43):
And that's just it.

Speaker 3 (48:44):
But having the awareness to learn that about
yourself is huge and that'sprobably been like the most eye
opening just the awareness partwhich I think as a collective,
for you're talking about usbeing a nine year not to jump,
but I think endings bringawareness because it makes you
reflect on what is happening andwhat is stopping and what's.

(49:06):
So it's like if this is ending,which, for me, like my nine
year, was good because therewere things I wanted to end, so
it's like if this is ending,which, for me, like my nine year
, was good because there werethings I wanted to end.
So it was like I was trying tofind out, like how do I end
these limiting beliefs?
But I think as a collectivethere's a lot of limiting
beliefs that are ending toohopefully.
You know, I think, at least inmy world.

Speaker 1 (49:25):
People are going to take this a lot of different
ways.
If you think about it, we'regoing to have a new president
again this year right, yeah,like right yeah but if we can
look at it as like anopportunistic ending rather than
a like you know, the fog, thedrones, the president, like
everyone's out to get us and Ithink it's just coming from that
like it's not a victim, likewe're.
Not all victims here we're,we're all here to like, evolve

(49:50):
and grow, create heaven on earth, like I truly believe that I'm
like.

Speaker 3 (49:53):
That's one thing I do truly believe for my religious
upbringing.
It's like that we and allreligions actually have this in
their texts that we are here tocreate heaven on earth, and I
think I don't know what jobwe're doing, but I feel like I'm
trying my best in my own world.

Speaker 1 (50:09):
In my own world.
Yes, I think that's.

Speaker 3 (50:10):
And that's all we can really do.
Yeah, you know, and I think Ithink we all contribute oh 100%.

Speaker 1 (50:16):
Yeah, I mean 100%, just like we were saying earlier
, like we're, it's like thatFind your, find your vibe tribe
yeah.

Speaker 2 (50:22):
Or Pam.

Speaker 1 (50:32):
Like we lady that we all see, and that was one thing,
like the first visit with hershe was like you were thinking,
in black and white I'm like what.
I was even wearing black andwhite that day, I'm not kidding
like a white shirt, like inblack blue shorts.
And it's funny because Iobviously I try not to wear
black and white too much with myguy.
I mean it's black.

Speaker 2 (50:50):
Well, it's like um you're.

Speaker 1 (50:54):
You're thinking in black and white.
You need to find your vibetribe because I was like all or
nothing and it was like I needto do this.
I'm on my own path, like, andit was like no, you're not.
And the more people you bring inyour circle that make you feel
good and the more you kind oflet go of that make you not.
Yeah, that you know.
Getting back to you know noteveryone can make you feel it,

(51:16):
but if you are feeling a certainway around a certain crowd,
somebody, honor that.
Whether it's good, bad,indifferent, null and void, but
honor it and have the awarenessto kind of soul search and just
like this is okay and that I canchoose my feeling For me.

Speaker 3 (51:35):
I was like, oh, that sounds fun, that sounds like I
want to do that.

Speaker 1 (51:38):
Yeah, you can choose to look at things differently.

Speaker 3 (51:41):
Realizing the reason you want the things you want
isn't for the thing, it's forthe feeling.
And realizing I can have thatfeeling now.
I don't have to wait for that Ilove it.
It's like I can do that.

Speaker 2 (51:58):
Yes, yeah, you actually are allowed.
Actually can, but I?

Speaker 3 (52:01):
think there's so many distractions in our society.

Speaker 2 (52:05):
And I'm not saying it's intentional Well, maybe.

Speaker 3 (52:07):
Yeah, because I do think our power does come from
within.
And if you don't spend yourtime in the mornings deciding
who you're going to be and whoyou're going to connect to and
here's my energy for today andhere's my feeling for today of
course, things happen throughoutthe day, but when I do do my
morning rituals, it is a totallydifferent day than when I just

(52:27):
wake up and start like check myphone.

Speaker 1 (52:37):
I'm cooking breakfast .

Speaker 3 (52:38):
I'm doing all these things it's like I I'm almost
being led right versus leadingright and you can do that
anytime like you can.

Speaker 1 (52:40):
You can reset.
You can, yeah, right, but whenyou get in your quiet car you
can do it then like okay, orwhen you know, it doesn't have
to be like right in the morning.

Speaker 3 (52:46):
You can do it at any time during your day, because I
do think people think like well,it's, it's gone, so I'll try
tomorrow, or I can't meditate,no.

Speaker 1 (52:53):
Focusing like putting your hand over your tummy and
your hand over your heart forlike eight breaths.
That's a meditation, yeah.

Speaker 3 (53:00):
Right, you could be at work and go in the bathroom
for five minutes and just takeright.

Speaker 2 (53:03):
Yeah, I do that when I'm at my fundraising events.

Speaker 3 (53:06):
I need a minute.
You have to Every time before Igo on stage.
I do the same prayer.

Speaker 2 (53:10):
And I don't always have time to wake up and do it
and slowly do it.
I mean, I make time during thecocktail hour where everyone
else is busy and I escape for asecond and I literally go in the
bathroom and put my palms upand just do my thing for 90
seconds and it instantly shiftsyou 100%.
It's all you need sometimes,yeah.

Speaker 1 (53:30):
At around big energy events, especially too, oh yes,
which, like they always are,there's always 500 people.

Speaker 2 (53:36):
I'm the one who's like going on stage to be this
channel to either like raisethis money or not raise the
money.

Speaker 1 (53:40):
Like you know and I don't let that scare me I'm like
okay, and yeah, and so that's,like always, my prayer.

Speaker 2 (53:47):
Like I put my palms up and they start to tingle,
which, by the way, they've beentingling since we've been
sitting here and talking.
Oh, I love it.

Speaker 1 (53:52):
Yeah, like majorly tingling it is, I love it.
Nothing like a threesomewithout a tingle, nothing like a
threesome, without a tingle.

Speaker 2 (54:03):
No lotion needed.
I was like crystal, crystal.
What am I sitting there Likedon't care anymore, all right.

(54:25):
So if there's one thingstarting this year off, kicking
this year, things that you wantbefore they happen, like if
you're looking at your visionboard and they're like just
words on a page to you or it'sjust images and you don't
connect to what that feels like,you won't become a match to
attract it.

(54:46):
Yes, so if you're doingsomething like that, like it's
awesome.
Jake and I sat and made visionboards the other night.

Speaker 3 (54:53):
Have the feeling before it's here.

Speaker 2 (54:54):
Have the feeling, before you get the thing, like
look at those things and, okay,what does it feel like to be
there in that place that I havea picture of on my board, or
what does it feel like to-.

Speaker 3 (55:03):
Be that version of yourself.

Speaker 2 (55:04):
Yeah, be that version of yourself, and then the
universe doesn't know thedifference of whether that's
real or fake, it just knows thatyou're a match for it.

Speaker 1 (55:11):
Yeah, so I love that.
Yeah, oh, that's a good one.

Speaker 3 (55:14):
That's my best so to piggyback on that, because I
totally believe that and for me,I always heard that and was
like, yes, it resonated with meimmediately.
But there were limiting beliefsthat kept me from that future
version and I had to resolvethose.
And maybe this isn't foreverybody, but for me I had to
resolve them before I could findmy new identity.
I had to, but I didn't want tobecause I don't feel good Right,

(55:36):
Like saying like I don't feelabundant, I don't feel worthy, I
don't feel confident, so, but Ihad to go into a year of like
why, you know?
before I could get there and noteverybody, I think, has to do
that, but I did before.
I could like finish that andthen say, okay, now how do I
want to feel?
But I had to identify what thatfeeling was because I haven't

(56:00):
felt those things before.
So it was like describe indetail what you think that would
feel like, or listen to peoplethat you think embody those
feelings and describe whatthey're showing, what kind of
feeling like.
Oh, they are showing thatthey're very confident.
They don't care what anyonethinks about, what they look
like, they don't think you knowlike.
So it was like okay, we'llstart to feel those things.

(56:22):
And I noticed havingself-awareness of like my
internal self, my internaldialogue, was not lining up with
, like when I wasn'tintentionally thinking I would
default to my old life.
Right, because that's just, andit's not like, oh, your body's
trying to sabotage, that's justwhat it's always known.
And so I had to also recognizethis.

(56:42):
Isn't like your body trying toself-sabotage, it's just trying
to like maintain status quo it'sa brain, but it's a
neurological.

Speaker 1 (56:49):
It's literally you have to literally create new
synapses.

Speaker 2 (56:53):
And if it was?

Speaker 3 (56:53):
easy.
You would have already done ita million times over.
So, like I think, for meputting an intentional time
every day to go.
How do you want to think today?
And I, I personally have phonereminders on my phone at two
times during the day to go.
How was your thinking?

Speaker 2 (57:10):
Because I don't?

Speaker 3 (57:10):
because if I don't, I just go right back into status
quo Especially.
I think I the school break wasgood for me because it kind of
gave me that time.
But when school starts back forme, you go back into your
normal life and it's like youget up.
At this time the kids have tobe here, you go to the gym, you
just, and so your thinking isjust like your subconscious is

(57:31):
doing its thing, it's like, no,I'm going to tell it what we're
thinking and you can do thingsdifferently, even when school
starts.
Yeah, yes, so I'm hoping I'vestarted that.

Speaker 2 (57:39):
Oh my, God, yes, a hundred percent.
Well, and that's like it's likethe snapping the rubber band,
like I'm willing to see thisdifferently.

Speaker 3 (57:47):
That's kind of what the alarm is for me Like you
know, where have you beenthinking in the last five hours?
Yeah, okay, like, well, thenlet's just get back on track and
has your day been in?

Speaker 1 (57:56):
alignment with that, and I think that that's what I
want to piggyback on both ofthose with is for everyone to
know that every day is a new day, every hour is a new hour,
every minute is a new minute.
You can reset at any time.
Yeah, period.
Yeah.
If you started the year arguingwith someone that you love or

(58:19):
someone that you don't, you knoweating a whole bag of Oreos
because yourself.

Speaker 2 (58:21):
I don't know, you're going through something hungover
, it doesn't matter.

Speaker 1 (58:24):
It doesn't mean your whole year has to be that way.
It means like, guess what, in10 minutes you can do things
differently.
You can start over anytime.
Whatever that means Like at anypoint, and I think that this
goes back to the all or nothing.
I have to tell myself this somuch, depending on what it is,
or you know where I'm going inmy day, because I think we get
into our routine, which I'm, youknow.

(58:44):
I like routine, but I'm alsoreally starting to love
embracing more change and nothaving as much as a routine and
just kind of like.
I'm just going to wing it todayand see what I feel like and
honor what I feel like feelsright for me today.
Yeah, so that's just somethingthat I think is super pivotal
when you're setting your goalsKnow that any time you can reset

(59:05):
yes, like at any point in time.
Yeah, and I love that.
And we've all had to do it amillion times without even
acknowledging and that's anotherchallenge to go back and think
of it, cause this is a big win,not even a little win.
Go back and think of the timesyou have reset, you know.
Think of, you know just thingsyou did last week, like oh wow,
I did this and I did that, orlike and celebrate the wins.

(59:27):
I think that we all need to getmore used to celebrating what
we have done and what we haveaccomplished and what we you
know and it doesn't have to bebig things, it could be.
You know, I maintained mysanity during my kids being home
.

Speaker 2 (59:40):
Well, right, yeah, not just the action resets but
like the thinking resets.
Like every time you do thateach day like, wow, nicole, I
just shifted my vibration fromyou know like negative spiral to
you know a different way to seeit.

Speaker 1 (59:52):
Right, and the more that we do that, we literally
rewire our brains and if we justcelebrate like, celebrate
yourself.
So you know what you guys Thankyou for tuning in today.
My girlfriend's here Love them.
We're going to go on the roadwith this one day and keep you
guys posted.
Oh that would be fun we're goingto let them in on the real

(01:00:17):
thing.
We're going to let them in, butseriously, do you go into this
year celebrating yourself,celebrating your life, no matter
where you are, and just own it,own it all and thank you,
ladies so much for being here,love you.

Speaker 3 (01:00:35):
This was fun.

Speaker 1 (01:00:36):
Love you Peace.