Are You Seeking Something Too Perfect?

Perfectionism might be the thief that's stealing your joy and you don't even realize it. What if the only upgrade you truly need is your thinking? In this thought-provoking episode, I explore our tendency to zero in on tiny imperfections while completely missing the beauty of what's already before us.

Think about those vacation photos where all you notice is your messy hair or that awkward sign in the background - missing entirely that these images capture beautiful, irreplaceable moments. Or consider how we do this with people: having an ambitious, loving partner but fixating on their occasional lateness, or enjoying a stable job but complaining about the office snacks (yes, those Oreos became a legitimate point of contention at my previous workplace!).

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Episode Transcript

Speaker 1 (00:00):
Welcome to Let it Be Easy with Susie Moore.
What if the only upgrade orchange you need is your thinking
?
Let me put this question to youthis way Are you seeking
something too perfect?

(00:21):
You know, I just got back froma trip and I was looking at a
lot of the photos that I wastaking and I was like, oh, my
hair doesn't look good in thatone.
Or oh, you can see that weirdsign in the background in that
one.
Or oh, this one's like slightlyfuzzy in this area and I
thought this is ridiculous.
These photos are gorgeous,they're fun, they captured a

(00:41):
moment and I want to relive themand enjoy them as I look, as I
share, as I even post a coupleof them.
It's so easy to zero in on thelittle bits that we don't like,
and this doesn't just apply tophotos, although I know some
people take their photos veryseriously.
It could apply to a lot.

(01:03):
Think about your partner.
If you have one, maybe he orshe is wonderful and ambitious
and hardworking, but they arelate a lot, or they're messy, or
they don't always ask you thedeep questions that you care
about, that you wish they wouldask you.
Or what about, if your job ispretty great, your salary's

(01:23):
decent, you feel like it'sstable, especially now and
there's a lot of uncertainty,but your co-worker is really
annoying.
Or even the snacks are bad.
I'm not joking.
In my last job we had a fewpeople who were complaining
about the snacks and I was like,hey, free snacks the way I grew
up we don't complain aboutanything that's free.
But I remember thinking, gosh,really that's a point of
contention.
The Oreos, they wantedhealthier snacks.

(01:43):
I mean, look, I like Oreos, butI'm like, gosh, really that's a
point of contention.
The Oreos, they wantedhealthier snacks.
I mean, look, I like Oreos, butI'm like we're missing the
point here.
This is a great company.
They give us a lot of stuff.
We're really supported here andyou're complaining about the
snacks.
Whether it's a photo, whetherit's a person, whether it's a
situation at work, are youseeking something too perfect?
You know, I work with a lady,very successful, who gave a lot

(02:06):
of presentations and she saidthat she could never even look
at a recording.
And it was suggested if youwant to be a great presenter,
it's advisable you look at yourvideos.
You can see how you look, youcan see your body language and
you can kind of correct yourselfor improve yourself.
The same way an athlete does.
They watch themselves duringthe game again and again.

(02:28):
Their coach shows them oh, didyou see this?
And oh, you missed that, andmaybe next time it can be very
helpful.
But she said to me Susie, if Isee a single mistake in a
presentation, she's like I'llfreak out, I'll go into a
tailspin and it will completelyruin my day.
And I said to her you know whatfeedback have you been getting

(02:50):
on your presentations, becauseyou seem pretty booked up.
And she was like, look, it'salways good.
The surveys I send, thesatisfaction reports are, like,
you know, five stars, good,repeat, repeat.
We would like her back.
And I said but what, like?
What would freak you out?
Like, give me an example ofsomething that would freak you
out.
Like, give me an example ofsomething that would freak you
out.
And she's like a typo.
She's like if I use the wrongwords, sometimes you know when

(03:11):
she's getting started, she canmaybe accidentally use the wrong
word.
We all do this, we're humanbeings.
Oh my gosh.
And she said if I, though, lookback at a recording and I see a
single mistake, she's like Iwill cringe so hard, I'll berate
myself to the point of I suck,I should give up, I should go do
something else.
And it's so extreme.
I said to her what if it wereme?
What if I were telling you this?

(03:32):
What if it were me looking backat my Zooms, looking back at my
presentations, thinking I can'teven see a single error,
because I will feel like a totalloser?
And she was like that is soharsh.
What if we can just lay downbeing perfect?
What if 80% is good enough?
Right, 80, 85%, let it be goodenough.

(03:55):
What if good enough is?
When I started doing this moreand more in recent years, it
made me a way better friend,definitely a way better wife,
letting a lot of small things go, not thinking I had to control
every single thing, making itperfect how we spent our weekend
, what we did with our money,what we should be talking about,
where we should be going onvacation, all these things that

(04:18):
just added stress to my life,removed all of the joy, removed
the presence, removed really thewhole point of it all.
Are you seeking something tooperfect and, as a result,
robbing yourself of somethingthat's pretty damn great?
Until tomorrow, my friends, somuch love and ease.

(04:42):
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(05:06):
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