May 15, 2025 • 40 mins
Dive into this enlightening exploration of gratitude and its remarkable impact on our lives. Today's episode unfolds the science behind gratitude, revealing how this simple emotion can enhance happiness, improve mental health, and strengthen relationships. Host Tammy Hershberger shares inspiring insights about the benefits of gratitude, including its effects on brain chemistry and emotional resilience.
Learn practical strategies for incorporating gratitude into your daily routine, from keeping a journal to expressing appreciation in your relationships. Hear how gratitude can lead to greater happiness and satisfaction both at home and work, encouraging a mindset shift toward positivity. As we navigate through the conversation, discover how gratitude not only improves individual health and emotional well-being but also fosters stronger social bonds and teamwork.
The episode emphasizes the importance of taking a moment to appreciate the little things in life, encouraging listeners to reflect on what they are thankful for daily. Whether you’re familiar with gratitude practices or exploring them for the first time, this episode offers valuable insights to enhance your journey toward self-awareness, encouragement, and overall well-being.
If you found value in this discussion, don’t forget to subscribe and share your thoughts in the comments. Your engagement helps us grow and enrich this community focused on building happier, healthier lives!
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Episode Transcript
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Tammy Hershberger (00:01):
Welcome to the Light Up your Business
podcast, the show where we divedeep into the world of small
businesses.
I'm your host, tammyHershberger, and each episode
will bring you inspiring stories, expert insights and practical
tips to help your small businessthrive.
Whether you're an entrepreneurjust starting out or a seasoned
business owner, this podcast isyour go-to source for success in
(00:21):
the small business world.
Let's get started to source forsuccess in the small business
world.
Let's get started.
Hi everyone, I want to welcomeyou back to another episode of
Light Up your Business podcast.
My name is Tammy Hershbergerand today I want to talk about
gratitude and the effects on thebrain.
So this article I found by thisperson named I'm going to
(00:43):
probably destroy this person'sname, but it's Madhulina Roy
Chowdhury and it was wrote onApril 9th of 2019, and it was
scientifically reviewed byWilliam Smith and it says it's
talking about how we all wantthis happy life, these cushy
jobs, perfect family, financialstability, great social life,
(01:03):
and we're always in thisinfinite pursuit of happiness.
That is mostly kind of a mirage, right, and you think about,
like, how often do we reallyexperiment to say thank you and
appreciate what you have in themoment?
Gratitude is a very powerfulhuman emotion.
By conveying and receivingsimple thank you messages, we
can truly derive the pleasurethat we seek everywhere else.
(01:26):
Gratitude comes from the Latinword gratia, which means
gratefulness or thankfulness.
So really, in this most simpleform, gratitude is a state of
thankfulness or a state of beinggrateful.
Proverbs says gratitude cantransform common days into
thanksgiving, turn routine jobsinto joy and change ordinary
(01:46):
opportunities into blessings.
So in positive psychology,gratitude is the human way of
acknowledging the good things oflife, and Scientologists I
don't know where that just camefrom psychologists have defined
gratitude as a positiveemotional response that we
perceive on giving or receivinga benefit from someone.
(02:11):
Gratitude is associated withpersonal benefits that were not
intentionally sought after,deserved or earned, but rather
because of the good intentionsof another person.
That's according to Emmons andMcCullough in 2004.
That's according to Emmons andMcCullough in 2004.
So thanking others, thankingourselves, you know, thanking
Mother Nature or, in my case,the Almighty God, gratitude in
(02:33):
any form can enlighten the mindand make us feel happier.
It has healing effects on us.
The benefits of gratitude areendless and in this article
we're going to go into here ittalks about like trying to
explore what gratitude is, thescientific base on it and
understanding how we can usegratitude to be happier in our
life.
So they have this littletriangular chart thing in this
article and it's talking aboutthe benefits of gratitude.
(02:58):
So first you get a happier you,you have positive emotions and
thoughts, you're more aware andawake, you have increased
self-satisfaction, your mood isenhanced, and then you have
these physical benefits, so it'smaybe a fitter you.
Your immune system getsstronger, you have less body
aches and pains, your bloodpressure is optimal and your
(03:18):
cardiac functioning is workinggreat.
You get better sleep.
And then there's the better you, which is the social side, and
that's better communication,more empathy, stronger
interpersonal relationships,more likability among group
members, more involvement as ateam member.
So if you take gratitude aspart of a happy life and being
(03:38):
happy may result in a betterhealth across a lifetime the
most immediate and reliablebenefits of gratitude are likely
to be psychological and socialrather than the physical.
So how does gratitude work?
Excuse me, my throat's messedup.
There's a quote from RobertBrault that says enjoy the
(03:58):
little things, for one day youmay look back and realize they
were big things.
I think that's kind of what weforget is like, especially me
being a business owner and doingall the things I do.
I get so enthralled in theselike big moments of like I got
to hit a million dollars, I gotto double the business, I got to
hire five people this year,whatever.
And I forget about like justthe most basic stuff.
(04:20):
I mean, this morning I kind ofthought about that.
I was like, well, man, I'mreally enjoying my warm cup of
coffee on this cool morningright, or when it's summertime
and I'm out on my patio and thebirds are chirping and there's a
nice little breeze and it'ssunny and I'm, you know, just
sitting there enjoying themoment, or the times when, you
know, I look at my little as Icall him my grandson.
I don't actually have kids, butI've adopted this kid as my
(04:46):
grandson, so, if you don't likeit too bad, but in those moments
I look at that little guy andhe's smiling and he's playing
and he's happy and I'm like thisis what it's about.
This is such a great momentwatching him be happy, and so
those things like that is whatwe need to kind of focus on.
So gratitude in all forms isassociated with happiness.
So whether we say thank you tosomeone or receive the same from
someone else.
The feelings it brings is apure satisfaction, encouragement
(05:09):
.
Expressions of gratitude helpin building and sustaining
long-term relationships, helpsus deal with adversity and
bounce back from them withstrength and motivation.
So let's talk about gratitudeand how it brings happiness.
Gratitude improvesinterpersonal relationships at
home and at work.
The connection betweengratitude and happiness is
(05:32):
really multidimensional.
When you express gratitude,basically to others, but also to
ourselves, it induces thesepositive emotions and it's
mostly happiness ourselves, andinduces these positive emotions,
and it's mostly happiness.
By producing feelings ofpleasure and contentment,
gratitude impacts our overallhealth and well-being as well.
(05:54):
In a survey on gratitude thatwas done on adult professionals,
this British psychologist andwellness expert named Robert
Holden found that 65 out of 100people that were selected over
health, although they indicatedthat both were equally important
for good life Holden, in astudy, suggested that the roots
of many psychological conditionslike depression, anxiety and
(06:16):
stress are really caused byunhappiness.
So think about that.
When we're depressed, we mightbe blaming our spouse.
When we're depressed, we mightbe blaming the weather.
When we're depressed, we mightsay, well, I just don't have
enough money.
Or we're anxious or stressed,it's because of work.
Well, it's probably more thatyou're just not happy.
(06:37):
Simple practices likemaintaining a gratitude journal,
complimenting yourself, sendingsmall tokens and thank you
notes to maybe your spouse or,you know, your friends, can make
them feel a lot better andenhance their mood almost
immediately.
A couple of studies have alsoindicated that partners who
express their thankfulness toeach other often sustain their
(06:57):
relationships with mutual trust,loyalty, and they had
long-lasting happy relationships.
So when you look at basicallygratitude on the left side, true
happiness on the right side,what kind of falls down the
middle?
Well, it's optimism, it'sselflessness, it's spirituality,
it's empathy and self-esteem.
(07:18):
So gratitude improves yourhealth.
So just being thankful improvesyour health.
Gratitude impacts on mental andphysical well-being Positive
psychology and mental health.
Researchers in the past fewdecades have established an
overwhelming connection betweengratitude and good health.
So keeping like a nice littlegratitude journal causes less
(07:38):
stress, improves the quality ofyour sleep and builds emotional
awareness by just writing downthings you're happy and thankful
for.
Right, it also buildsprofessional commitment.
So when you think aboutgrateful from the sense of
workers, they're more efficient,they're more productive,
they're more responsible.
By expressing gratitude in theworkplace in a very proactive
(08:03):
way towards buildinginterpersonal relationships and
bonds, they trigger feelings ofcloseness and bonding.
So if you want your team, who'svery divided, to come together,
let's talk about some gratitude,right, maybe they're thankful
for their job, maybe they'rethankful that you bought them
new equipment.
Maybe they're thankful theyhave a warm, you know office to
work in.
Whatever, find ways to bringgratitude in.
(08:23):
Maybe you tell them howgrateful you are for them and
then they recognize good workthey give and that gives
everyone their basically ownimportance in the group and then
they'll actually communicatewith the other team members and
remember gratitude is reallyimportant.
To be a leader Also, you needto be compassionate, considerate
(08:44):
, empathetic and love others,right, but gratitude will help
bring all that out, I believe.
And then there's thisneuroscientific research into
gratitude and it says Zig Ziglarif you're a fan of him, like I
am he says gratitude is thehealthiest of all human emotions
.
Isn't that interestingGratitude?
Some people, I all humanemotions, isn't that interesting
Gratitude?
(09:05):
Some people I don't even think.
Think of gratitude as anemotion.
Emotion, you know, sadness anddepressed and anxious.
But gratitude is thankful, I amthankful.
It actually kind of makes mesmile when I say I'm thankful,
makes me appreciative, makes mehappy.
So it says gratitude wassignificant in ancient
philosophies and cultures, forexample in the Roman culture and
(09:31):
I'm going to butcher this namewhere Cicero mentioned gratitude
as the mother of all humanfeelings and an area of
neuropsychological research.
However, it was a rare subjectof concern until the last couple
of decades.
So let's kind of get into thegratitude on the brain stuff
here.
So it says neural mechanismsthat are responsible for
(09:52):
feelings of gratitude havegrabbed attention lately.
Studies have demonstrated thatat the brain level, more
judgmental geez, I can't eventalk more judgments involving
feelings of gratitude are evokedin the right anticular temporal
cortex.
People who express and feelgratitude have a higher volume
of gray matter in the rightinterior temporal gyrus, which
(10:15):
is so interesting.
You can actually see it in thebrain.
There's more tissue there.
It's so interesting how ourbodies are made, I think you
there.
It's so interesting how ourbodies are made, I think.
So there's this little charthere.
It says gratitude in the brain.
So one wires and fires newneural connections to the bliss
center, which is kind of alwayshappening the more grateful you
(10:40):
are.
It enhances dopamine andserotonin and the
neurotransmitters areresponsible for happiness.
So the more of that you'regetting, the more happy you're
going to be.
It reduces fear and anxiety byregulating the stress hormone,
and then it fosters cognitiverestructuring by evoking
positive thinking.
So you look at all that and I'mlike, well geez, just being
grateful, just being thankful,does all of that?
(11:01):
I have more dopamine andserotonin flowing through my
brain, right?
I have this cognitiverestructuring happening that's
making me think more positive.
I have all these anxietiesbeing reduced and more regulated
I mean, who doesn't?
Just by being thankful, bybeing grateful, right?
So this is kind of interesting.
I'm talking aboutneurotransmitters.
(11:23):
You know I'm not a scienceperson, I'm not smart in that
direction, so I'm just going toread this to you.
It says Emily Fletcher, thefounder of Ziva, a well-known
meditation training site,mentioned in one of her
publications that gratitude is anatural antidepressant.
The effects of gratitude, whenpracticed daily, can also be the
same as medication.
It produces a feeling oflong-lasting happiness and
(11:46):
contentment, the psychologicalbasis of which lies at the
neurotransmitter level.
So when we express gratitudeand receive the same, our brain
releases dopamine and serotonin,the two crucial neurotrans
transmitters responsible for ouremotions, and they make us feel
good.
They enhance our moodimmediately.
They make us happy from theinside out.
(12:06):
So by consciously practicinggratitude every day, we can help
these natural pathways tostrengthen themselves and
ultimately create this permanentgrateful and positive nature
within ourselves.
And anytime we don't have totake medicine.
I am for it Because medicine isthe problem I have.
Now I'm not telling you don'ttake your medicine, but if you
look at those medicines andthat's I'm going to give you a
(12:27):
kind of a drastic example, but Idon't know, say it's for
migraines and I'm taking thismedicine.
Well, some of those medicationsyou have hair loss, weight gain
, your knee could fall off.
I feel like there's like thesenasty side effects that are
sometimes actually way worsediabetes, other things than what
(12:49):
you're actually trying to treat.
So I'm like you're going to fixyour knee, but your arm's going
to fall off or whatever.
Because I'm like, just pleaselook at the side effects and
think, is this worth what I'mtrying to fix?
Because it's going to cause meto have all these other problems
.
And so when you can find thesenatural ways, I say do it.
(13:09):
So then it talks about gratitudeand social psychology.
Gratitude has a social aspectto it that argues basically that
it's really a socially drivenemotion.
Social psychologists believe itto be entwined with the
perception of what we have donefor others and what others have
done for us.
So it's kind of the give andtake.
According to them, gratitude isan emotion that directly
targets at building andsustaining social bonding.
(13:31):
Okay, so, like the moregrateful we are with each other,
the more we're going to bond.
So in this sense it's got likeyour emotions or feelings of
gratitude lead to perceivedsocial support and likability,
which leads to improved groupdynamics and communications,
which then all flows into thesestrong interpersonal connections
(13:52):
.
We all want friends, we allneed them, and so we kind of
build each other up with thisgratitude.
How gratitude affects the brain.
It is not happiness that bringsus gratitude, it is gratitude
that brings us happiness.
So think about that.
If you say, um, I have to behappy before I'm grateful, I
(14:18):
have a button for you and it'sthis one.
It's called no, not true, notaccurate, complete bull.
The reason is you will be happywhen you become more grateful,
right?
So it's like nagging about howyour spouse is so miserable.
Well, maybe you should begrateful for them and maybe then
(14:39):
, by your actions of beinggrateful, they will be nicer to
you and then overall, thingswill improve.
Right, that's how it works.
So then it talks aboutgratitude may be a gesture.
You know just certain kind ofwords that you're using and then
we give or receive them to eachother, right.
But these simple exchanges ofthankfulness go a long way in
(15:01):
affecting our overall biologicalfunctioning, especially the
brain and the nervous system.
Any kind of effect of gratitudeon the brain is very
long-lasting.
Besides enhancing self-love andempathy, gratitude significantly
impacts body functions andpsychological additions like
stress, anxiety and depression.
So one gratitude releases toxicemotions.
(15:23):
The limbic system is part ofthe brain that is responsible
for all emotional experiences.
It consists of oh jeepers,those are huge words thalamus,
hypothalamus, amygdala,hippocampus and cingulate gyrus,
I think, is how you say it.
Studies have shown thathippocampus and amygdala the two
(15:47):
main sites regulating emotions,the memory and the body
functions.
They get activated withfeelings of gratitude.
A study conducted onindividuals seeking mental
health guidance revealed thatparticipants of the group who
wrote letters of gratitudebesides their regular counseling
sessions felt better andrecovered sooner.
I personally have a grateful orgratitude section in my quiet
(16:09):
time every day.
In my journal there's a sectionwhere I write the things each
day that I'm thankful for and itreally does kind of remind you
like get off the surface, getoff the big stuff and look at
the everyday stuff that I am sothankful for, and it really does
kind of remind you, like, getoff the surface, get off the big
stuff and look at the everydaystuff that I am so thankful for.
I'm thankful for my husband.
I'm thankful for my businesses.
I'm so thankful for the teamthat I have that helps support
me and my businesses.
I'm thankful for my warm cup ofcoffee.
(16:32):
I'm thankful for my warm home.
I'm thankful for a nice home.
I'm thankful for my car thatgets me to work every day.
There's all these things thatyou can look at and be like just
thankful for.
Okay, then it talks aboutgratitude reduces pain.
This is from Emmons andMcCullough.
They did a study that wastitled Counting Blessings Versus
(16:52):
Burdens and it says a studyconducted on evaluating the
effect of gratitude on physicalwell-being indicated that 16% of
the patients who kept agratitude journal reported
reduced pain symptoms and weremore willing to work out and
cooperate with the treatmentprocedure.
And then, when you dig deeperinto that, the cause unleashed
by that regulating the level ofdopamine gratitude fills is more
(17:15):
vitality, thereby reducingfeelings of pain.
I I mean, are you getting whatthis does?
There's so much effects it has.
It's wild three gratitudeimproves sleep quality.
So there's some studies thathave shown receiving and
displaying simple acts ofkindness activate the amyg no,
the hypothalamus, and therebyregulating all bodily mechanisms
(17:37):
controlled by the hypothalamus,out of which sleep is a vital
one.
So that thing regulatesBasically.
Let me rephrase that when youhave this hypothalamic
regulation happening throughgratitude, it's basically
(17:57):
causing you to go deeper andhealthier in your sleep, right?
So like you're getting intoyour REM, you're getting a full
night's sleep, you're not wakingup all the time, and so you're
getting better sleep, you'refeeling more refreshed and
you're energetic every morning.
Who doesn't want that?
Gratitude aims and stressregulation.
So in this McCardian Childrythey did a study and in one of
(18:18):
their studies on gratitude andappreciation, they found that
participants who felt gratefulshowed a marked reduction in the
level of cortisol, the stresshormone.
They had better cardiacfunctioning and were more
resilient to emotional setbacksand negative experiences.
Remember, earlier you talkedabout bounce back.
That's what it is Somethingkind of emotionally bad kind of
happens and instead of you justcrumbling into a million pieces,
(18:39):
it may hit you, but you'regoing to bounce back faster,
you're going to keep moving.
So by practicing gratitude, wecan handle stress better.
And then, by merelyacknowledging and appreciating
the little things in life, westart to rewire the brain to
deal with the presentcircumstances with more of
awareness and this broaderperception.
(19:00):
And then, when you start doingthat, think about that you're
going to make better decisions.
Anxiety and depression.
So I've dealt with both ofthese and it's talking about by
using gratitude and reducing thestress hormone and managing the
automatic nervous system,gratitude significantly reduces
symptoms of depression andanxiety and at the neurochemical
level, feelings of gratitudeare associated with an increase
(19:24):
in the natural no, I'm sorry,it's neural modulation at the
prefrontal cortex, the brainsite responsible for managing
negative emotions like guilt,shame and violence.
So first of all, I'm just goingto say this you can all tell I
am not a science major, I'm nota scientific person.
I can barely say these words.
So work with me here.
(19:44):
Business is more my thing, butI do find it very, very
fascinating that being grateful.
I mean I know people who havesome stuff they should be so
freaking grateful for andthey're not, and they're
miserable people and I'm justlike man.
I wish you would see howblessed you are.
So at the end of this articlehere it's talking about.
(20:05):
Does gratitude change the brain?
So it says?
Ucla did a research they callit the mindful awareness, and it
said that gratitude does changethe neural structures in the
brain.
It makes us feel happier andmore content.
Feeling grateful andappreciating others when they do
something good for us triggersthe good hormones, and then that
(20:26):
regulates the immune system,which, if your immune system is
in good shape, what you're notgetting sick so much so.
Scientists have suggested that,by activating the reward center
of the brain, gratitudeexchange alters the way we see
the world and ourselves.
And then there's thisinteresting Dr Alex Korb.
(20:46):
He wrote a book called UpwardSpiral and he mentions in his
book that when we give andreceive thank you notes, our
brain is automaticallyredirected to pay attention to
what we have, producingintrinsic motivation and a
strong awareness of the present.
And at the neurochemical level,gratitude acts as a catalyst for
neurotransmitters like thesebig words again serotonin,
(21:09):
dopamine I have no idea how tosay this last one Noropinephrine
.
I don't know If I all I can sayis a scientific podcast, I
would be off the air.
No one will listen to mebecause I can't pronounce the
words.
So thank you for being with me.
I promise you this is going tobe good for you.
Just ignore my words because Ican't say them.
(21:31):
So kind of like the end all beall thing here is like just be
thankful for what you have andyou'll end up having more, and
if you really concentrate onwhat you don't have, you'll
never have enough.
The bible talks about how wetake a mountain, or no, we make
mountains out of molehills,right, and so, like we make
(21:52):
things too big, our mind blowsthese things out of proportion,
and so I want you guys to behappy.
I want you to have all thisenergy and feel good and feel
healthy and not be depressed andnot be anxious.
So just have more gratitude,right.
So in the morning, think ofways you can have more gratitude
, think of you know things andwrite them down.
While you're having your coffeeAt the end of the night, if
that's when you want to do it.
Write down the things you'rethankful for for that day,
(22:13):
because it does impact us.
It impacts our body, our immunesystem, our emotions, our
physical, our mental, all of it.
And then it talks aboutcultivating happiness and joy.
So let's kind of wrap this upwith this so how do I get this
joy?
How do I get this gratefulness?
Well, I'm kind of sad that Ihave to tell you that, but we're
going to do that anyway.
(22:33):
So one is appreciate yourself.
You know, we, a lot of timespeople especially women, but I'm
sure men do it we stand infront of that mirror and we tear
ourselves apart.
Right, my butt's too big, I'vegained too much weight, my boobs
are not big enough, whatever.
And so, instead of doing that,how about you stand there and
say five good things aboutyourself?
How about you complimentyourself?
(22:53):
Use words that are the oppositeI'm beautiful, I'm loyal, I'm
disciplined, I'm kind, I'mloving, I'm loyal, I'm
disciplined, I'm kind, I'mloving and then see how that
makes you feel and repeat thisoften to yourself.
And then do that gratitudejournal.
Right, get a journal, anotebook, a something, and write
down things you know.
One minimum, five is great,three is great.
Every day of all the thingsthat you're grateful for, don't
(23:15):
overlook the small things, nomatter how unimportant they may
seem.
Gratitude visits.
We all have someone whoseunconditional support and help
has meant a lot to us.
We feel as if we owe ourhappiness and success to them.
If we have such a person in ourlives.
They might be your friend, yourfamily or a professional
associate.
Try to meet with them once amonth, if you can Get that plan
(23:37):
set up.
Go and then express to themthat you're thankful for them.
Let them know they're importantto you.
Talk about good memories, talkto them about things that you
are looking to do so you can gettheir support.
Usually that will bring afeeling of sanctity and
positivity to you.
So I mean one for me is I don'tsee her enough but my friend
(23:58):
Margaret Perry.
She was an amazingbusinesswoman.
She's, in a way, kind ofmentored me without knowing it.
I worked for her and she was anamazing boss.
I learned a lot from her and Ilearned about standing up for
myself.
My mother taught me that, likehow you fight and you stand up
for yourself.
You don't let people push youaround, you don't take no for an
answer.
Then you find that gratitudebuddy right.
And these are good if you havethem like your spouse or a
(24:22):
friend at work or whatever, andyou can talk to them daily if
possible.
Just have a few minuteconversation with them.
Tell them about things you'rethankful for.
Let them tell you what they'rethankful for Sharing the
thoughts of gratefulness withsomeone is a great way to
motivate yourself and strengthenyour emotional skills.
And then, talking back toanxiety, how do we, like get
this anxiety out?
(24:42):
Well, anxiety is our body'sinward wake-up call that
something is wrong, something isnot right.
John Deloney has a good bookabout anxiety that I highly
recommend you read.
And so when fear sets in, whenthat body is starting to freak
out and the alarms are going offand you're panicking a little
bit and you having this anxiety,what happens is your body
starts releasing hormones thatcreate that fight-or-flight mode
(25:04):
right, and we react very muchsimilar.
So the brain doesn't get muchtime to analyze the right or
wrong when the adrenaline starts.
The worst upshot of anxiety isit makes us feel insecure and we
start questioning that innerstrength and then eventually
these coping mechanisms start tofail.
So there's a book by Alex Korbnamed Grateful Brain, and it
(25:26):
says in that book that our brainis conditioned to function in a
repeated way.
For example, a person whoworries too much about the
adverse outcomes willsubconsciously rewire his brain
to process negative informationonly.
And he mentions that our mindcannot focus on positive and
negative at the same time.
It gets confused.
I don't know what to do.
And then he talks about byconsciously practicing gratitude
(25:48):
, we can train the brain toattend selectively to positive
emotions and thoughts, whichthen reduces the anxiety and
that apprehension feeling wehave.
This is kind of an interestingstudy.
It says it's a study thatvalidates the relationship
(26:10):
between gratitude and death.
This will be interesting.
Or death anxiety Okay, I got it.
So it's anxiety that like I'mterrified to die.
And this was Law and ching.
2011 is the study, so it says.
The experiment was conducted on83 chinese adults from 60 or 60
years old and above.
They were divided into threegroups.
(26:31):
One group was asked to writegratitude notes and words of
positivity, another was asked towrite about their and the third
was asked to just write aboutneutral tasks.
So they do all this and it saysthe groups were exposed to
stimuli arousing death anxietythe inevitable fear that we're
all going to suffer.
Results showed thatparticipants of the first group
(26:53):
who did the grateful notesshowed fewer symptoms of the
death anxiety than the other twogroups when they reexamined all
of the results again.
That with a gratitude attitudein life, we gain acceptance and
become fearless of the future.
At a neurobiological level,gratitude regulates the
sympathetic system thatactivates our anxiety response
(27:16):
and at the psychological levelit conditions the brain to
filter the negative emotions,ruminations and focus on the
positive thoughts.
So again you can see gratitudepractices are really effective
for treating phobias like death,anxiety, ptsd, social phobia
and things of such nature.
(27:38):
Gratitude makes sense of yourpast, brings peace for today and
creates a vision for tomorrow.
So even if you're in grief forexample, right Like I man, I've
been through some stuff.
My mother passed away, like sixyears ago, I think, something
like that.
My grandmother passed away, whowas like my second mother.
I've personally experiencedsome serious loss and I don't
(28:03):
know, grief is hard to move onfrom.
I don't know grief is hard tomove on from, especially if you
just kind of sit in it.
And as difficult as it maysound, if you can grieve with
some kind of gratitude it canbring rays of hope in in the
darkest times.
Finding a reason to be thankfulin days of despair may seem
impossible.
There's a book wrote by KellyBuckley and she says in her book
(28:24):
how she found the meaning ofher pain in life after losing
her 23 year old son.
While it is true that practicinggratitude makes us resilient to
negative emotions and distress.
It cannot be denied thatmundane misfortunes are
inevitable and bound to affectour well-being.
So let's talk about griefmanagement, because grief I know
so many people that deals withgrief Some people have just
(28:46):
pushed it down.
I did that for a long time andgrief's going to happen.
I mean, life is short, we'renot all going to be here forever
and I would like for you tohave ways to deal with it if you
are grieving now or ifsomething happens in the future.
One is you kind of want to cryit out, right?
Crying doesn't make us weak,men.
If you're listening, I've heardyou say it men are weak if they
(29:07):
cry.
That is baloney.
You have no heart if you don'tcry.
In my opinion, cry it out Now.
You don't want to cry every day, every hour.
I mean, like you should be ableto kind of let it out and then
be dry for a little bit and thenit happens, maybe in a couple
days or whatever.
But just know, crying is an actof acceptance and awareness of
our emotions.
We cry because we know we arefeeling sad and we know why
(29:31):
we're feeling sad.
It gives us a way to vent thepain and helps us to step out
and change our lives.
Okay, so cry it out.
Then collect the broken pieces.
Grieving with gratitude lets usappreciate the things we still
have.
For example, for a person whojust got fired from his job,
being thankful for his familyand friends who stand by his
side during the crisis can helpreduce the pain.
(29:52):
By consciously acknowledgingtheir love and support, he or
she can feel grateful and regainthe motivation to look for
other employment opportunities.
Right, you don't have to justbe in it by yourself.
Then you want to ask for help.
Not everybody likes to do this.
I mean, I'm not always great atit myself.
Make sure you seek professionalhelp when you're just your
(30:13):
coping mechanisms are notworking.
Studies have shown that peoplewho practice gratitude are more
willing to participate incounseling and therapy for
managing their depression, andthe prognosis is much brighter
in these cases.
I you've probably heard me talkabout I am a huge advocate for
therapy.
I have been to I go to aChristian therapist Amazing,
I've only been to one in my lifeand this, this woman, is
(30:35):
amazing.
Um, we bring God into it and Ifind that I heal emotionally,
mentally, so much faster byhaving God brought into it.
So I think, if you havestruggles and you're not sure
how to deal with it, or you'rescared to dig into it because
you don't know if you can getyourself back out, well, you
need some help, and so Irecommend that Keeping a
(30:55):
gratitude jar is fun.
I actually have one.
There's a little glass jarSometimes they're boxes and you
just take a little piece ofpaper.
Then, each day or you know, Idon't always do it every day,
but I do it when I have some bigstuff happening that I notice
or something that really meanssomething to me I'll write the
little piece of paper and I'llput it in the jar.
So it could be family, goodhealth, something your friends
did, you know, you got a newhome, whatever.
(31:19):
You endured something that youdidn't think you were going to
make it through.
And then, as that jar fills up,you'll start to see that
there's all these blessings, andevery now and then, or every
three months or whatever, youopen the jar and you read it
because it reminds you, or, ifyou're having a really bad day,
open it and remind yourself ofall the blessings and all the
things you have to be gratefulfor.
Okay, so then resilience ittalks about that.
(31:41):
Um, it's part of a copingmechanism, really.
By managing positive emotionslike satisfaction, happiness and
pleasure, gratitude enhancesour emotional resilience and
builds our inner strength tocombat stress.
I think sometimes we forget toattend to the better things in
life because we're already thereand we don't have to do
(32:03):
anything to make them stay withus.
Practicing gratitude is thebest way to remind ourselves to
do the things that give uscourage to move on in life.
Okay, so then there's anotherstudy.
It's kind of a boring study,I'm going to skip that one
Building resilience withgratitude.
(32:23):
Many psychologists believe thatemotional resilience is an
interplay of five componentsSocial competence, which is the
ability to stand out amongothers and urge to win a
situation.
Problem solving, the ability tofocus on solutions and
proactively act on them.
Autonomy, the motivation toexercise freedom and ask for it
when it's required.
Forgiveness, the inner power tolet go of something and move on
(32:46):
.
And empathy, the strength tofeel others and look into the
matter from their point of view.
I want to hit those last tworeally quick Resilience,
forgiveness and empathy, withoutgoing too far into it.
You guys know my story.
I have found in therapy, bylearning to face the truth,
(33:07):
learning to face the things I'vestruggled with, the things that
I, you know have hurt me, Ihave found so much forgiveness
and empathy and those kind of gotogether because as I forgive
people for hurting me or forgivepeople for letting me down or
whatever, I start to see thisempathy of like they're people,
they're struggling, they havetheir own issues.
There's probably things I don'tknow anything about that
(33:32):
they've gone through.
And then I start to realize,like, if they're human and
they've got problems, and Iprobably don't know about some
of those problems, why in theworld would I constantly stay
angry at them Because they'rehurting, they don't know, maybe,
how to deal with stuff, orthey're not dealing with stuff,
or they're so depressed oranxious or whatever.
And then I start to realizelike, well, I'm going to forgive
those people and then thatbrings up this freedom inside of
me, this forgiveness.
(33:54):
The weight goes away and I don'thave to carry it anymore and
what that does is it helps ussee the positive things in life.
It basically kind of rebuildsthat pessimistic outlook into
more of an optimistic.
I used to be the worstpessimist.
I am an optimist.
Over the years and, being abeliever, that has changed for
me.
I think it helps to staygrounded and accept the present
situation, even if it's a harshreality.
(34:15):
You know, the harsh reality forme is I don't have my business
anymore, but I accept that andI'm okay with it.
And I know there's betterthings coming for me, see, and
that's called being resilient,right, maintaining good health
by regulating your metabolicfunctioning and then the
hormonal imbalances, let's noteven talk about that this time.
Sustain relationships andappreciate people who are there
(34:35):
for us.
Then we feel more loved, caredfor and more hopeful.
So a few, really quickly,practices for building that
emotional resilience.
Meditation, breath work isreally good.
You know, doing that gratitudelist, making notes about
gratitude.
You know small thank you notesto your wife or your spouse or
(34:56):
your workers.
On the meditation side, I'llhit that real quick.
You just kind of want to sitback, take a few deep breaths,
feel more relaxed.
You'll kind of recollect thepainful memories of the past.
You know, maybe some illnessthat you or your loved ones
fought, financial struggles,whatever.
You'll want to close your eyes,take, you know, let yourself
kind of go back to those dayswhere you were struggling.
Then slowly move your attentionand bring it back to the life
(35:19):
you're living now.
Think of all the things younever thought you could get
today, or things that you neverthought you could do because of
how hurtful something was in thepast, and then imagine how safe
and happy you are.
Take a moment to rejoice and bekind of accomplished in a
silent way.
Just kind of sit there and bethankful for those moments and
then stay there for a moment andthen slowly open your eyes and
(35:42):
then notice how you feel.
I would imagine gratefulnessshould come into you Gratitude
and stress.
This is an interesting quote.
William Arthur Ward says Godgave you a gift of 86,400
seconds today.
Have you used one of thoseseconds to say thank you?
Have you?
You driving in your car rightnow?
You listening while you'reworking out?
(36:02):
Did you say thank you to anyone?
I don't know.
Maybe you should.
Uh, stress in our body'snatural response to change,
whether it's good or bad.
Positive stress or another wordI can't say use your stress, I
don't know brings us joy and isusually the least of our
concerns.
Unforeseen setbacks triggernegative stress or distress and
(36:23):
we consider it toxic and we justwant to get rid of it.
Okay, let's see if there'sanything else interesting in
this article.
One thing I thought wasinteresting.
Talking about depression, itsays it's impossible to feel
depressed and grateful at thesame time.
So think about that, uh.
(36:44):
Dr john medina wrote a bookcalled brain rules and he
mentions how gratitude could bean eye-opener in low times.
He indicated that by lookingaround and acknowledging the
support we have right now, wecan successfully shift focus
from our burdens to theblessings we have.
So depression has apsychological and neurochemical
base, both of which can beaddressed by gratitude.
(37:04):
By displacing our attentionfrom problems to solutions.
Gratitude practices hit theserotonin, dopamine and oxytocin
neurotransmitters that make usfeel good.
With the surge of thesechemicals in the brain, the
apathy gets curbed away and werevive the motivation that
depression has sucked away.
So let's not be depressed,let's be more thankful, let's
(37:28):
see what.
There's anything elseinteresting.
I think that is good for thatsection.
If you're out there justexisting, I want you to live
life to its fullest.
Find those things you'rethankful for, express those
things you know.
Focus on those things you'rethankful for.
Express those things you know,focus on those things and
(37:49):
remember that practicinggratitude is synonymous to
expressing our feelings forothers and ourselves.
By simple words of love andpraise, we not only make others
feel good, but we also feel alot better ourselves.
Gratitude is about feeling theright, feeling good right now
and feeling good about the rightthings and at the right time.
It's inseparably linked withself-discipline and motivation.
(38:10):
It may not give us instantrelief from pain and stress, but
it brings the feelings ofcontrol back to us and, in time,
it can start to change byacknowledging and appreciating
our assets.
Gratitude gives us the chargefor your own lives.
And this woman named RobinSharman her quote says no,
sharma is her name her quotesays gratitude drives happiness,
(38:33):
happiness boosts productivity,productivity reveals mastery and
mastery inspires the world.
Hey, if you appreciate thisepisode, like share, subscribe,
leave me a message.
Remember, I'm on all platforms.
If you want to be a guest on myshow, I'm always looking for
business owners, people who runa business, people who are
(38:53):
subcontracted anything Painters,drywallers, coffee shops, I
don't know.
Whatever you do, if you havesome kind of business, I want to
talk to you.
I find it interesting.
I find it's interesting to seehow you started, how you
overcame things.
You know what stresses you had.
We can all learn from eachother and if we all just come
and share with each other, werise up together.
So thank you for listening.
(39:15):
I will see you guys next time.
Have a great day and rememberin the world of business, every
success story begins with apassionate dream and ends with a
strategic billion-dollarhandshake.
Stay ambitious, stay innovativeand keep making those deals
that reshape tomorrow.
Thank you all for tuning in anduntil next time, remember.
(39:38):
Proverbs 3.3 says Let love andfaithfulness never leave you.
Bind them around your neck,Write them on the tablet of your
heart.
That way you will win favor anda good name in the sight of God
and man.
And remember.
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Welcome to the Light Up your Business
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I'm your host, tammyHershberger, and each episode
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(00:21):
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Hi everyone, I want to welcomeyou back to another episode of
Light Up your Business podcast.
My name is Tammy Hershbergerand today I want to talk about
gratitude and the effects on thebrain.
So this article I found by thisperson named I'm going to
(00:43):
probably destroy this person'sname, but it's Madhulina Roy
Chowdhury and it was wrote onApril 9th of 2019, and it was
scientifically reviewed byWilliam Smith and it says it's
talking about how we all wantthis happy life, these cushy
jobs, perfect family, financialstability, great social life,
(01:03):
and we're always in thisinfinite pursuit of happiness.
That is mostly kind of a mirage, right, and you think about,
like, how often do we reallyexperiment to say thank you and
appreciate what you have in themoment?
Gratitude is a very powerfulhuman emotion.
By conveying and receivingsimple thank you messages, we
can truly derive the pleasurethat we seek everywhere else.
(01:26):
Gratitude comes from the Latinword gratia, which means
gratefulness or thankfulness.
So really, in this most simpleform, gratitude is a state of
thankfulness or a state of beinggrateful.
Proverbs says gratitude cantransform common days into
thanksgiving, turn routine jobsinto joy and change ordinary
(01:46):
opportunities into blessings.
So in positive psychology,gratitude is the human way of
acknowledging the good things oflife, and Scientologists I
don't know where that just camefrom psychologists have defined
gratitude as a positiveemotional response that we
perceive on giving or receivinga benefit from someone.
(02:11):
Gratitude is associated withpersonal benefits that were not
intentionally sought after,deserved or earned, but rather
because of the good intentionsof another person.
That's according to Emmons andMcCullough in 2004.
That's according to Emmons andMcCullough in 2004.
So thanking others, thankingourselves, you know, thanking
Mother Nature or, in my case,the Almighty God, gratitude in
(02:33):
any form can enlighten the mindand make us feel happier.
It has healing effects on us.
The benefits of gratitude areendless and in this article
we're going to go into here ittalks about like trying to
explore what gratitude is, thescientific base on it and
understanding how we can usegratitude to be happier in our
life.
So they have this littletriangular chart thing in this
article and it's talking aboutthe benefits of gratitude.
(02:58):
So first you get a happier you,you have positive emotions and
thoughts, you're more aware andawake, you have increased
self-satisfaction, your mood isenhanced, and then you have
these physical benefits, so it'smaybe a fitter you.
Your immune system getsstronger, you have less body
aches and pains, your bloodpressure is optimal and your
(03:18):
cardiac functioning is workinggreat.
You get better sleep.
And then there's the better you, which is the social side, and
that's better communication,more empathy, stronger
interpersonal relationships,more likability among group
members, more involvement as ateam member.
So if you take gratitude aspart of a happy life and being
(03:38):
happy may result in a betterhealth across a lifetime the
most immediate and reliablebenefits of gratitude are likely
to be psychological and socialrather than the physical.
So how does gratitude work?
Excuse me, my throat's messedup.
There's a quote from RobertBrault that says enjoy the
(03:58):
little things, for one day youmay look back and realize they
were big things.
I think that's kind of what weforget is like, especially me
being a business owner and doingall the things I do.
I get so enthralled in theselike big moments of like I got
to hit a million dollars, I gotto double the business, I got to
hire five people this year,whatever.
And I forget about like justthe most basic stuff.
(04:20):
I mean, this morning I kind ofthought about that.
I was like, well, man, I'mreally enjoying my warm cup of
coffee on this cool morningright, or when it's summertime
and I'm out on my patio and thebirds are chirping and there's a
nice little breeze and it'ssunny and I'm, you know, just
sitting there enjoying themoment, or the times when, you
know, I look at my little as Icall him my grandson.
I don't actually have kids, butI've adopted this kid as my
(04:46):
grandson, so, if you don't likeit too bad, but in those moments
I look at that little guy andhe's smiling and he's playing
and he's happy and I'm like thisis what it's about.
This is such a great momentwatching him be happy, and so
those things like that is whatwe need to kind of focus on.
So gratitude in all forms isassociated with happiness.
So whether we say thank you tosomeone or receive the same from
someone else.
The feelings it brings is apure satisfaction, encouragement
(05:09):
.
Expressions of gratitude helpin building and sustaining
long-term relationships, helpsus deal with adversity and
bounce back from them withstrength and motivation.
So let's talk about gratitudeand how it brings happiness.
Gratitude improvesinterpersonal relationships at
home and at work.
The connection betweengratitude and happiness is
(05:32):
really multidimensional.
When you express gratitude,basically to others, but also to
ourselves, it induces thesepositive emotions and it's
mostly happiness ourselves, andinduces these positive emotions,
and it's mostly happiness.
By producing feelings ofpleasure and contentment,
gratitude impacts our overallhealth and well-being as well.
(05:54):
In a survey on gratitude thatwas done on adult professionals,
this British psychologist andwellness expert named Robert
Holden found that 65 out of 100people that were selected over
health, although they indicatedthat both were equally important
for good life Holden, in astudy, suggested that the roots
of many psychological conditionslike depression, anxiety and
(06:16):
stress are really caused byunhappiness.
So think about that.
When we're depressed, we mightbe blaming our spouse.
When we're depressed, we mightbe blaming the weather.
When we're depressed, we mightsay, well, I just don't have
enough money.
Or we're anxious or stressed,it's because of work.
Well, it's probably more thatyou're just not happy.
(06:37):
Simple practices likemaintaining a gratitude journal,
complimenting yourself, sendingsmall tokens and thank you
notes to maybe your spouse or,you know, your friends, can make
them feel a lot better andenhance their mood almost
immediately.
A couple of studies have alsoindicated that partners who
express their thankfulness toeach other often sustain their
(06:57):
relationships with mutual trust,loyalty, and they had
long-lasting happy relationships.
So when you look at basicallygratitude on the left side, true
happiness on the right side,what kind of falls down the
middle?
Well, it's optimism, it'sselflessness, it's spirituality,
it's empathy and self-esteem.
(07:18):
So gratitude improves yourhealth.
So just being thankful improvesyour health.
Gratitude impacts on mental andphysical well-being Positive
psychology and mental health.
Researchers in the past fewdecades have established an
overwhelming connection betweengratitude and good health.
So keeping like a nice littlegratitude journal causes less
(07:38):
stress, improves the quality ofyour sleep and builds emotional
awareness by just writing downthings you're happy and thankful
for.
Right, it also buildsprofessional commitment.
So when you think aboutgrateful from the sense of
workers, they're more efficient,they're more productive,
they're more responsible.
By expressing gratitude in theworkplace in a very proactive
(08:03):
way towards buildinginterpersonal relationships and
bonds, they trigger feelings ofcloseness and bonding.
So if you want your team, who'svery divided, to come together,
let's talk about some gratitude,right, maybe they're thankful
for their job, maybe they'rethankful that you bought them
new equipment.
Maybe they're thankful theyhave a warm, you know office to
work in.
Whatever, find ways to bringgratitude in.
(08:23):
Maybe you tell them howgrateful you are for them and
then they recognize good workthey give and that gives
everyone their basically ownimportance in the group and then
they'll actually communicatewith the other team members and
remember gratitude is reallyimportant.
To be a leader Also, you needto be compassionate, considerate
(08:44):
, empathetic and love others,right, but gratitude will help
bring all that out, I believe.
And then there's thisneuroscientific research into
gratitude and it says Zig Ziglarif you're a fan of him, like I
am he says gratitude is thehealthiest of all human emotions
.
Isn't that interestingGratitude?
Some people, I all humanemotions, isn't that interesting
Gratitude?
(09:05):
Some people I don't even think.
Think of gratitude as anemotion.
Emotion, you know, sadness anddepressed and anxious.
But gratitude is thankful, I amthankful.
It actually kind of makes mesmile when I say I'm thankful,
makes me appreciative, makes mehappy.
So it says gratitude wassignificant in ancient
philosophies and cultures, forexample in the Roman culture and
(09:31):
I'm going to butcher this namewhere Cicero mentioned gratitude
as the mother of all humanfeelings and an area of
neuropsychological research.
However, it was a rare subjectof concern until the last couple
of decades.
So let's kind of get into thegratitude on the brain stuff
here.
So it says neural mechanismsthat are responsible for
(09:52):
feelings of gratitude havegrabbed attention lately.
Studies have demonstrated thatat the brain level, more
judgmental geez, I can't eventalk more judgments involving
feelings of gratitude are evokedin the right anticular temporal
cortex.
People who express and feelgratitude have a higher volume
of gray matter in the rightinterior temporal gyrus, which
(10:15):
is so interesting.
You can actually see it in thebrain.
There's more tissue there.
It's so interesting how ourbodies are made, I think you
there.
It's so interesting how ourbodies are made, I think.
So there's this little charthere.
It says gratitude in the brain.
So one wires and fires newneural connections to the bliss
center, which is kind of alwayshappening the more grateful you
(10:40):
are.
It enhances dopamine andserotonin and the
neurotransmitters areresponsible for happiness.
So the more of that you'regetting, the more happy you're
going to be.
It reduces fear and anxiety byregulating the stress hormone,
and then it fosters cognitiverestructuring by evoking
positive thinking.
So you look at all that and I'mlike, well geez, just being
grateful, just being thankful,does all of that?
(11:01):
I have more dopamine andserotonin flowing through my
brain, right?
I have this cognitiverestructuring happening that's
making me think more positive.
I have all these anxietiesbeing reduced and more regulated
I mean, who doesn't?
Just by being thankful, bybeing grateful, right?
So this is kind of interesting.
I'm talking aboutneurotransmitters.
(11:23):
You know I'm not a scienceperson, I'm not smart in that
direction, so I'm just going toread this to you.
It says Emily Fletcher, thefounder of Ziva, a well-known
meditation training site,mentioned in one of her
publications that gratitude is anatural antidepressant.
The effects of gratitude, whenpracticed daily, can also be the
same as medication.
It produces a feeling oflong-lasting happiness and
(11:46):
contentment, the psychologicalbasis of which lies at the
neurotransmitter level.
So when we express gratitudeand receive the same, our brain
releases dopamine and serotonin,the two crucial neurotrans
transmitters responsible for ouremotions, and they make us feel
good.
They enhance our moodimmediately.
They make us happy from theinside out.
(12:06):
So by consciously practicinggratitude every day, we can help
these natural pathways tostrengthen themselves and
ultimately create this permanentgrateful and positive nature
within ourselves.
And anytime we don't have totake medicine.
I am for it Because medicine isthe problem I have.
Now I'm not telling you don'ttake your medicine, but if you
look at those medicines andthat's I'm going to give you a
(12:27):
kind of a drastic example, but Idon't know, say it's for
migraines and I'm taking thismedicine.
Well, some of those medicationsyou have hair loss, weight gain
, your knee could fall off.
I feel like there's like thesenasty side effects that are
sometimes actually way worsediabetes, other things than what
(12:49):
you're actually trying to treat.
So I'm like you're going to fixyour knee, but your arm's going
to fall off or whatever.
Because I'm like, just pleaselook at the side effects and
think, is this worth what I'mtrying to fix?
Because it's going to cause meto have all these other problems
.
And so when you can find thesenatural ways, I say do it.
(13:09):
So then it talks about gratitudeand social psychology.
Gratitude has a social aspectto it that argues basically that
it's really a socially drivenemotion.
Social psychologists believe itto be entwined with the
perception of what we have donefor others and what others have
done for us.
So it's kind of the give andtake.
According to them, gratitude isan emotion that directly
targets at building andsustaining social bonding.
(13:31):
Okay, so, like the moregrateful we are with each other,
the more we're going to bond.
So in this sense it's got likeyour emotions or feelings of
gratitude lead to perceivedsocial support and likability,
which leads to improved groupdynamics and communications,
which then all flows into thesestrong interpersonal connections
(13:52):
.
We all want friends, we allneed them, and so we kind of
build each other up with thisgratitude.
How gratitude affects the brain.
It is not happiness that bringsus gratitude, it is gratitude
that brings us happiness.
So think about that.
If you say, um, I have to behappy before I'm grateful, I
(14:18):
have a button for you and it'sthis one.
It's called no, not true, notaccurate, complete bull.
The reason is you will be happywhen you become more grateful,
right?
So it's like nagging about howyour spouse is so miserable.
Well, maybe you should begrateful for them and maybe then
(14:39):
, by your actions of beinggrateful, they will be nicer to
you and then overall, thingswill improve.
Right, that's how it works.
So then it talks aboutgratitude may be a gesture.
You know just certain kind ofwords that you're using and then
we give or receive them to eachother, right.
But these simple exchanges ofthankfulness go a long way in
(15:01):
affecting our overall biologicalfunctioning, especially the
brain and the nervous system.
Any kind of effect of gratitudeon the brain is very
long-lasting.
Besides enhancing self-love andempathy, gratitude significantly
impacts body functions andpsychological additions like
stress, anxiety and depression.
So one gratitude releases toxicemotions.
(15:23):
The limbic system is part ofthe brain that is responsible
for all emotional experiences.
It consists of oh jeepers,those are huge words thalamus,
hypothalamus, amygdala,hippocampus and cingulate gyrus,
I think, is how you say it.
Studies have shown thathippocampus and amygdala the two
(15:47):
main sites regulating emotions,the memory and the body
functions.
They get activated withfeelings of gratitude.
A study conducted onindividuals seeking mental
health guidance revealed thatparticipants of the group who
wrote letters of gratitudebesides their regular counseling
sessions felt better andrecovered sooner.
I personally have a grateful orgratitude section in my quiet
(16:09):
time every day.
In my journal there's a sectionwhere I write the things each
day that I'm thankful for and itreally does kind of remind you
like get off the surface, getoff the big stuff and look at
the everyday stuff that I am sothankful for, and it really does
kind of remind you, like, getoff the surface, get off the big
stuff and look at the everydaystuff that I am so thankful for.
I'm thankful for my husband.
I'm thankful for my businesses.
I'm so thankful for the teamthat I have that helps support
me and my businesses.
I'm thankful for my warm cup ofcoffee.
(16:32):
I'm thankful for my warm home.
I'm thankful for a nice home.
I'm thankful for my car thatgets me to work every day.
There's all these things thatyou can look at and be like just
thankful for.
Okay, then it talks aboutgratitude reduces pain.
This is from Emmons andMcCullough.
They did a study that wastitled Counting Blessings Versus
(16:52):
Burdens and it says a studyconducted on evaluating the
effect of gratitude on physicalwell-being indicated that 16% of
the patients who kept agratitude journal reported
reduced pain symptoms and weremore willing to work out and
cooperate with the treatmentprocedure.
And then, when you dig deeperinto that, the cause unleashed
by that regulating the level ofdopamine gratitude fills is more
(17:15):
vitality, thereby reducingfeelings of pain.
I I mean, are you getting whatthis does?
There's so much effects it has.
It's wild three gratitudeimproves sleep quality.
So there's some studies thathave shown receiving and
displaying simple acts ofkindness activate the amyg no,
the hypothalamus, and therebyregulating all bodily mechanisms
(17:37):
controlled by the hypothalamus,out of which sleep is a vital
one.
So that thing regulatesBasically.
Let me rephrase that when youhave this hypothalamic
regulation happening throughgratitude, it's basically
(17:57):
causing you to go deeper andhealthier in your sleep, right?
So like you're getting intoyour REM, you're getting a full
night's sleep, you're not wakingup all the time, and so you're
getting better sleep, you'refeeling more refreshed and
you're energetic every morning.
Who doesn't want that?
Gratitude aims and stressregulation.
So in this McCardian Childrythey did a study and in one of
(18:18):
their studies on gratitude andappreciation, they found that
participants who felt gratefulshowed a marked reduction in the
level of cortisol, the stresshormone.
They had better cardiacfunctioning and were more
resilient to emotional setbacksand negative experiences.
Remember, earlier you talkedabout bounce back.
That's what it is Somethingkind of emotionally bad kind of
happens and instead of you justcrumbling into a million pieces,
(18:39):
it may hit you, but you'regoing to bounce back faster,
you're going to keep moving.
So by practicing gratitude, wecan handle stress better.
And then, by merelyacknowledging and appreciating
the little things in life, westart to rewire the brain to
deal with the presentcircumstances with more of
awareness and this broaderperception.
(19:00):
And then, when you start doingthat, think about that you're
going to make better decisions.
Anxiety and depression.
So I've dealt with both ofthese and it's talking about by
using gratitude and reducing thestress hormone and managing the
automatic nervous system,gratitude significantly reduces
symptoms of depression andanxiety and at the neurochemical
level, feelings of gratitudeare associated with an increase
(19:24):
in the natural no, I'm sorry,it's neural modulation at the
prefrontal cortex, the brainsite responsible for managing
negative emotions like guilt,shame and violence.
So first of all, I'm just goingto say this you can all tell I
am not a science major, I'm nota scientific person.
I can barely say these words.
So work with me here.
(19:44):
Business is more my thing, butI do find it very, very
fascinating that being grateful.
I mean I know people who havesome stuff they should be so
freaking grateful for andthey're not, and they're
miserable people and I'm justlike man.
I wish you would see howblessed you are.
So at the end of this articlehere it's talking about.
(20:05):
Does gratitude change the brain?
So it says?
Ucla did a research they callit the mindful awareness, and it
said that gratitude does changethe neural structures in the
brain.
It makes us feel happier andmore content.
Feeling grateful andappreciating others when they do
something good for us triggersthe good hormones, and then that
(20:26):
regulates the immune system,which, if your immune system is
in good shape, what you're notgetting sick so much so.
Scientists have suggested that,by activating the reward center
of the brain, gratitudeexchange alters the way we see
the world and ourselves.
And then there's thisinteresting Dr Alex Korb.
(20:46):
He wrote a book called UpwardSpiral and he mentions in his
book that when we give andreceive thank you notes, our
brain is automaticallyredirected to pay attention to
what we have, producingintrinsic motivation and a
strong awareness of the present.
And at the neurochemical level,gratitude acts as a catalyst for
neurotransmitters like thesebig words again serotonin,
(21:09):
dopamine I have no idea how tosay this last one Noropinephrine
.
I don't know If I all I can sayis a scientific podcast, I
would be off the air.
No one will listen to mebecause I can't pronounce the
words.
So thank you for being with me.
I promise you this is going tobe good for you.
Just ignore my words because Ican't say them.
(21:31):
So kind of like the end all beall thing here is like just be
thankful for what you have andyou'll end up having more, and
if you really concentrate onwhat you don't have, you'll
never have enough.
The bible talks about how wetake a mountain, or no, we make
mountains out of molehills,right, and so, like we make
(21:52):
things too big, our mind blowsthese things out of proportion,
and so I want you guys to behappy.
I want you to have all thisenergy and feel good and feel
healthy and not be depressed andnot be anxious.
So just have more gratitude,right.
So in the morning, think ofways you can have more gratitude
, think of you know things andwrite them down.
While you're having your coffeeAt the end of the night, if
that's when you want to do it.
Write down the things you'rethankful for for that day,
(22:13):
because it does impact us.
It impacts our body, our immunesystem, our emotions, our
physical, our mental, all of it.
And then it talks aboutcultivating happiness and joy.
So let's kind of wrap this upwith this so how do I get this
joy?
How do I get this gratefulness?
Well, I'm kind of sad that Ihave to tell you that, but we're
going to do that anyway.
(22:33):
So one is appreciate yourself.
You know, we, a lot of timespeople especially women, but I'm
sure men do it we stand infront of that mirror and we tear
ourselves apart.
Right, my butt's too big, I'vegained too much weight, my boobs
are not big enough, whatever.
And so, instead of doing that,how about you stand there and
say five good things aboutyourself?
How about you complimentyourself?
(22:53):
Use words that are the oppositeI'm beautiful, I'm loyal, I'm
disciplined, I'm kind, I'mloving, I'm loyal, I'm
disciplined, I'm kind, I'mloving and then see how that
makes you feel and repeat thisoften to yourself.
And then do that gratitudejournal.
Right, get a journal, anotebook, a something, and write
down things you know.
One minimum, five is great,three is great.
Every day of all the thingsthat you're grateful for, don't
(23:15):
overlook the small things, nomatter how unimportant they may
seem.
Gratitude visits.
We all have someone whoseunconditional support and help
has meant a lot to us.
We feel as if we owe ourhappiness and success to them.
If we have such a person in ourlives.
They might be your friend, yourfamily or a professional
associate.
Try to meet with them once amonth, if you can Get that plan
(23:37):
set up.
Go and then express to themthat you're thankful for them.
Let them know they're importantto you.
Talk about good memories, talkto them about things that you
are looking to do so you can gettheir support.
Usually that will bring afeeling of sanctity and
positivity to you.
So I mean one for me is I don'tsee her enough but my friend
(23:58):
Margaret Perry.
She was an amazingbusinesswoman.
She's, in a way, kind ofmentored me without knowing it.
I worked for her and she was anamazing boss.
I learned a lot from her and Ilearned about standing up for
myself.
My mother taught me that, likehow you fight and you stand up
for yourself.
You don't let people push youaround, you don't take no for an
answer.
Then you find that gratitudebuddy right.
And these are good if you havethem like your spouse or a
(24:22):
friend at work or whatever, andyou can talk to them daily if
possible.
Just have a few minuteconversation with them.
Tell them about things you'rethankful for.
Let them tell you what they'rethankful for Sharing the
thoughts of gratefulness withsomeone is a great way to
motivate yourself and strengthenyour emotional skills.
And then, talking back toanxiety, how do we, like get
this anxiety out?
(24:42):
Well, anxiety is our body'sinward wake-up call that
something is wrong, something isnot right.
John Deloney has a good bookabout anxiety that I highly
recommend you read.
And so when fear sets in, whenthat body is starting to freak
out and the alarms are going offand you're panicking a little
bit and you having this anxiety,what happens is your body
starts releasing hormones thatcreate that fight-or-flight mode
(25:04):
right, and we react very muchsimilar.
So the brain doesn't get muchtime to analyze the right or
wrong when the adrenaline starts.
The worst upshot of anxiety isit makes us feel insecure and we
start questioning that innerstrength and then eventually
these coping mechanisms start tofail.
So there's a book by Alex Korbnamed Grateful Brain, and it
(25:26):
says in that book that our brainis conditioned to function in a
repeated way.
For example, a person whoworries too much about the
adverse outcomes willsubconsciously rewire his brain
to process negative informationonly.
And he mentions that our mindcannot focus on positive and
negative at the same time.
It gets confused.
I don't know what to do.
And then he talks about byconsciously practicing gratitude
(25:48):
, we can train the brain toattend selectively to positive
emotions and thoughts, whichthen reduces the anxiety and
that apprehension feeling wehave.
This is kind of an interestingstudy.
It says it's a study thatvalidates the relationship
(26:10):
between gratitude and death.
This will be interesting.
Or death anxiety Okay, I got it.
So it's anxiety that like I'mterrified to die.
And this was Law and ching.
2011 is the study, so it says.
The experiment was conducted on83 chinese adults from 60 or 60
years old and above.
They were divided into threegroups.
(26:31):
One group was asked to writegratitude notes and words of
positivity, another was asked towrite about their and the third
was asked to just write aboutneutral tasks.
So they do all this and it saysthe groups were exposed to
stimuli arousing death anxietythe inevitable fear that we're
all going to suffer.
Results showed thatparticipants of the first group
(26:53):
who did the grateful notesshowed fewer symptoms of the
death anxiety than the other twogroups when they reexamined all
of the results again.
That with a gratitude attitudein life, we gain acceptance and
become fearless of the future.
At a neurobiological level,gratitude regulates the
sympathetic system thatactivates our anxiety response
(27:16):
and at the psychological levelit conditions the brain to
filter the negative emotions,ruminations and focus on the
positive thoughts.
So again you can see gratitudepractices are really effective
for treating phobias like death,anxiety, ptsd, social phobia
and things of such nature.
(27:38):
Gratitude makes sense of yourpast, brings peace for today and
creates a vision for tomorrow.
So even if you're in grief forexample, right Like I man, I've
been through some stuff.
My mother passed away, like sixyears ago, I think, something
like that.
My grandmother passed away, whowas like my second mother.
I've personally experiencedsome serious loss and I don't
(28:03):
know, grief is hard to move onfrom.
I don't know grief is hard tomove on from, especially if you
just kind of sit in it.
And as difficult as it maysound, if you can grieve with
some kind of gratitude it canbring rays of hope in in the
darkest times.
Finding a reason to be thankfulin days of despair may seem
impossible.
There's a book wrote by KellyBuckley and she says in her book
(28:24):
how she found the meaning ofher pain in life after losing
her 23 year old son.
While it is true that practicinggratitude makes us resilient to
negative emotions and distress.
It cannot be denied thatmundane misfortunes are
inevitable and bound to affectour well-being.
So let's talk about griefmanagement, because grief I know
so many people that deals withgrief Some people have just
(28:46):
pushed it down.
I did that for a long time andgrief's going to happen.
I mean, life is short, we'renot all going to be here forever
and I would like for you tohave ways to deal with it if you
are grieving now or ifsomething happens in the future.
One is you kind of want to cryit out, right?
Crying doesn't make us weak,men.
If you're listening, I've heardyou say it men are weak if they
(29:07):
cry.
That is baloney.
You have no heart if you don'tcry.
In my opinion, cry it out Now.
You don't want to cry every day, every hour.
I mean, like you should be ableto kind of let it out and then
be dry for a little bit and thenit happens, maybe in a couple
days or whatever.
But just know, crying is an actof acceptance and awareness of
our emotions.
We cry because we know we arefeeling sad and we know why
(29:31):
we're feeling sad.
It gives us a way to vent thepain and helps us to step out
and change our lives.
Okay, so cry it out.
Then collect the broken pieces.
Grieving with gratitude lets usappreciate the things we still
have.
For example, for a person whojust got fired from his job,
being thankful for his familyand friends who stand by his
side during the crisis can helpreduce the pain.
(29:52):
By consciously acknowledgingtheir love and support, he or
she can feel grateful and regainthe motivation to look for
other employment opportunities.
Right, you don't have to justbe in it by yourself.
Then you want to ask for help.
Not everybody likes to do this.
I mean, I'm not always great atit myself.
Make sure you seek professionalhelp when you're just your
(30:13):
coping mechanisms are notworking.
Studies have shown that peoplewho practice gratitude are more
willing to participate incounseling and therapy for
managing their depression, andthe prognosis is much brighter
in these cases.
I you've probably heard me talkabout I am a huge advocate for
therapy.
I have been to I go to aChristian therapist Amazing,
I've only been to one in my lifeand this, this woman, is
(30:35):
amazing.
Um, we bring God into it and Ifind that I heal emotionally,
mentally, so much faster byhaving God brought into it.
So I think, if you havestruggles and you're not sure
how to deal with it, or you'rescared to dig into it because
you don't know if you can getyourself back out, well, you
need some help, and so Irecommend that Keeping a
(30:55):
gratitude jar is fun.
I actually have one.
There's a little glass jarSometimes they're boxes and you
just take a little piece ofpaper.
Then, each day or you know, Idon't always do it every day,
but I do it when I have some bigstuff happening that I notice
or something that really meanssomething to me I'll write the
little piece of paper and I'llput it in the jar.
So it could be family, goodhealth, something your friends
did, you know, you got a newhome, whatever.
(31:19):
You endured something that youdidn't think you were going to
make it through.
And then, as that jar fills up,you'll start to see that
there's all these blessings, andevery now and then, or every
three months or whatever, youopen the jar and you read it
because it reminds you, or, ifyou're having a really bad day,
open it and remind yourself ofall the blessings and all the
things you have to be gratefulfor.
Okay, so then resilience ittalks about that.
(31:41):
Um, it's part of a copingmechanism, really.
By managing positive emotionslike satisfaction, happiness and
pleasure, gratitude enhancesour emotional resilience and
builds our inner strength tocombat stress.
I think sometimes we forget toattend to the better things in
life because we're already thereand we don't have to do
(32:03):
anything to make them stay withus.
Practicing gratitude is thebest way to remind ourselves to
do the things that give uscourage to move on in life.
Okay, so then there's anotherstudy.
It's kind of a boring study,I'm going to skip that one
Building resilience withgratitude.
(32:23):
Many psychologists believe thatemotional resilience is an
interplay of five componentsSocial competence, which is the
ability to stand out amongothers and urge to win a
situation.
Problem solving, the ability tofocus on solutions and
proactively act on them.
Autonomy, the motivation toexercise freedom and ask for it
when it's required.
Forgiveness, the inner power tolet go of something and move on
(32:46):
.
And empathy, the strength tofeel others and look into the
matter from their point of view.
I want to hit those last tworeally quick Resilience,
forgiveness and empathy, withoutgoing too far into it.
You guys know my story.
I have found in therapy, bylearning to face the truth,
(33:07):
learning to face the things I'vestruggled with, the things that
I, you know have hurt me, Ihave found so much forgiveness
and empathy and those kind of gotogether because as I forgive
people for hurting me or forgivepeople for letting me down or
whatever, I start to see thisempathy of like they're people,
they're struggling, they havetheir own issues.
There's probably things I don'tknow anything about that
(33:32):
they've gone through.
And then I start to realize,like, if they're human and
they've got problems, and Iprobably don't know about some
of those problems, why in theworld would I constantly stay
angry at them Because they'rehurting, they don't know, maybe,
how to deal with stuff, orthey're not dealing with stuff,
or they're so depressed oranxious or whatever.
And then I start to realizelike, well, I'm going to forgive
those people and then thatbrings up this freedom inside of
me, this forgiveness.
(33:54):
The weight goes away and I don'thave to carry it anymore and
what that does is it helps ussee the positive things in life.
It basically kind of rebuildsthat pessimistic outlook into
more of an optimistic.
I used to be the worstpessimist.
I am an optimist.
Over the years and, being abeliever, that has changed for
me.
I think it helps to staygrounded and accept the present
situation, even if it's a harshreality.
(34:15):
You know, the harsh reality forme is I don't have my business
anymore, but I accept that andI'm okay with it.
And I know there's betterthings coming for me, see, and
that's called being resilient,right, maintaining good health
by regulating your metabolicfunctioning and then the
hormonal imbalances, let's noteven talk about that this time.
Sustain relationships andappreciate people who are there
(34:35):
for us.
Then we feel more loved, caredfor and more hopeful.
So a few, really quickly,practices for building that
emotional resilience.
Meditation, breath work isreally good.
You know, doing that gratitudelist, making notes about
gratitude.
You know small thank you notesto your wife or your spouse or
(34:56):
your workers.
On the meditation side, I'llhit that real quick.
You just kind of want to sitback, take a few deep breaths,
feel more relaxed.
You'll kind of recollect thepainful memories of the past.
You know, maybe some illnessthat you or your loved ones
fought, financial struggles,whatever.
You'll want to close your eyes,take, you know, let yourself
kind of go back to those dayswhere you were struggling.
Then slowly move your attentionand bring it back to the life
(35:19):
you're living now.
Think of all the things younever thought you could get
today, or things that you neverthought you could do because of
how hurtful something was in thepast, and then imagine how safe
and happy you are.
Take a moment to rejoice and bekind of accomplished in a
silent way.
Just kind of sit there and bethankful for those moments and
then stay there for a moment andthen slowly open your eyes and
(35:42):
then notice how you feel.
I would imagine gratefulnessshould come into you Gratitude
and stress.
This is an interesting quote.
William Arthur Ward says Godgave you a gift of 86,400
seconds today.
Have you used one of thoseseconds to say thank you?
Have you?
You driving in your car rightnow?
You listening while you'reworking out?
(36:02):
Did you say thank you to anyone?
I don't know.
Maybe you should.
Uh, stress in our body'snatural response to change,
whether it's good or bad.
Positive stress or another wordI can't say use your stress, I
don't know brings us joy and isusually the least of our
concerns.
Unforeseen setbacks triggernegative stress or distress and
(36:23):
we consider it toxic and we justwant to get rid of it.
Okay, let's see if there'sanything else interesting in
this article.
One thing I thought wasinteresting.
Talking about depression, itsays it's impossible to feel
depressed and grateful at thesame time.
So think about that, uh.
(36:44):
Dr john medina wrote a bookcalled brain rules and he
mentions how gratitude could bean eye-opener in low times.
He indicated that by lookingaround and acknowledging the
support we have right now, wecan successfully shift focus
from our burdens to theblessings we have.
So depression has apsychological and neurochemical
base, both of which can beaddressed by gratitude.
(37:04):
By displacing our attentionfrom problems to solutions.
Gratitude practices hit theserotonin, dopamine and oxytocin
neurotransmitters that make usfeel good.
With the surge of thesechemicals in the brain, the
apathy gets curbed away and werevive the motivation that
depression has sucked away.
So let's not be depressed,let's be more thankful, let's
(37:28):
see what.
There's anything elseinteresting.
I think that is good for thatsection.
If you're out there justexisting, I want you to live
life to its fullest.
Find those things you'rethankful for, express those
things you know.
Focus on those things you'rethankful for.
Express those things you know,focus on those things and
(37:49):
remember that practicinggratitude is synonymous to
expressing our feelings forothers and ourselves.
By simple words of love andpraise, we not only make others
feel good, but we also feel alot better ourselves.
Gratitude is about feeling theright, feeling good right now
and feeling good about the rightthings and at the right time.
It's inseparably linked withself-discipline and motivation.
(38:10):
It may not give us instantrelief from pain and stress, but
it brings the feelings ofcontrol back to us and, in time,
it can start to change byacknowledging and appreciating
our assets.
Gratitude gives us the chargefor your own lives.
And this woman named RobinSharman her quote says no,
sharma is her name her quotesays gratitude drives happiness,
(38:33):
happiness boosts productivity,productivity reveals mastery and
mastery inspires the world.
Hey, if you appreciate thisepisode, like share, subscribe,
leave me a message.
Remember, I'm on all platforms.
If you want to be a guest on myshow, I'm always looking for
business owners, people who runa business, people who are
(38:53):
subcontracted anything Painters,drywallers, coffee shops, I
don't know.
Whatever you do, if you havesome kind of business, I want to
talk to you.
I find it interesting.
I find it's interesting to seehow you started, how you
overcame things.
You know what stresses you had.
We can all learn from eachother and if we all just come
and share with each other, werise up together.
So thank you for listening.
(39:15):
I will see you guys next time.
Have a great day and rememberin the world of business, every
success story begins with apassionate dream and ends with a
strategic billion-dollarhandshake.
Stay ambitious, stay innovativeand keep making those deals
that reshape tomorrow.
Thank you all for tuning in anduntil next time, remember.
(39:38):
Proverbs 3.3 says Let love andfaithfulness never leave you.
Bind them around your neck,Write them on the tablet of your
heart.
That way you will win favor anda good name in the sight of God
and man.
And remember.
If you like what you heardtoday, click the follow button
so you never miss an episode.
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