July 15, 2025 • 38 mins
Mistakes can feel insurmountable, but they are often just stepping stones in your journey towards success. In this engaging episode of the Light Up Your Business podcast, host Tammy Hershberger discusses the pivotal role mistakes play in business and personal growth. Through candid storytelling and relatable examples, Tammy emphasizes the importance of reframing our perspective on setbacks, transforming them into invaluable lessons that fuel innovation and resilience.
Listeners will benefit from actionable insights on how to navigate failures, whether in a business context or personal life. The conversation covers how acknowledgment and acceptance of emotions surrounding mistakes are essential in fostering learning and growth. Moreover, Tammy highlights real-world examples, such as businesses that have thrived after initially stumbling.
This episode encourages listeners to embrace their unique journeys, shift their mindsets, and leverage the challenges they've faced into opportunities for positive transformation. You'll also discover strategies for implementing lessons learned and fostering connections through support networks, emphasizing that no one needs to face their struggles alone.
Join us in turning problems into opportunities and setbacks into victories. Share your experiences with us on social media, and remember to keep pushing forward with courage and determination! Don't forget to subscribe, leave a review, and spread the word!
Say goodbye to overwhelm and self-doubt, and hello to confidence and success. Join the Faith Filled Coaching family today and step into the abundant future you've always envisioned.
Visit FaithFilledCoach.com to schedule your free 30-minute consultation. Let's make your business dreams a reality, together.
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Transcript
Episode Transcript
Available transcripts are automatically generated. Complete accuracy is not guaranteed.
Tammy Hershberger (00:01):
Welcome to the Light Up your Business
podcast, the show where we divedeep into the world of small
businesses.
I'm your host, TammyHershberger, and each episode
will bring you inspiring stories, expert insights and practical
tips to help your small businessthrive.
Whether you're an entrepreneurjust starting out or a seasoned
business owner, this podcast isyour go-to source for success in
(00:21):
the small business world.
Let's get started to source forsuccess in the small business
world.
Let's get started.
Hi everyone, I want to welcomeyou back to another episode of
Light Up your Business podcast.
My name is Tammy Hershberger.
It's been a minute.
I took a little break fromrecording.
It's winter and I'm freezingand I just decided to do some
(00:44):
other stuff and I am back.
I've got a bunch of episodeswe're going to knock out and
today's episode.
I want to talk to you guys aboutturning mistakes into mastery
and that's called reframingfailures into lessons.
I think I've talked about thisa little bit in the past, but I
don't like calling mistakesfailures.
I used to do that.
With help of therapy and a lotof personal growth, I have
learned that there really is nomistakes in life.
(01:04):
Mistakes are really justlessons.
I mean, some lessons are morecostly than others, but we learn
something If you don't.
You got problems here becauseyou should be learning from the
things that you're failing at orthe things that you didn't do
right, and hopefully you dobetter next time.
So to me, it's crucial forevery business leader,
(01:25):
entrepreneur and anyone with abig dream to learn that you've
got to reframe these things.
We're talking about reframingmistakes in business into
valuable lessons.
So if you've ever felt likeyour latest blunder might be the
end of the world, I have beenthere.
Stay tuned, because we're aboutto turn those mistakes into
mastery.
So we all make mistakes,especially in business.
From failed product launches tounsuccessful marketing
(01:48):
campaigns, it's easy to getdiscouraged when things don't go
according to plan, but what ifI told you that mistakes are
actually golden opportunities indisguise?
Today, we'll discuss how toreframe those inevitable errors
into powerful lessons that drivegrowth and innovation.
So let's talk about the natureof mistakes.
So if you start byacknowledging that a fundamental
(02:10):
truth is mistakes are a part ofevery successful business
journey, I guarantee you, if youtalk to all the big guys who
own all the big, hugecorporations, they will tell you
that mistakes happen, failurehappens.
Not every business ventureworks, not every plan you make
works.
I mean, that's in life, right,and if you're going to make
(02:30):
mistakes, you're probably notpushing the envelope enough.
I would say you're probablyplaying small.
What does playing small mean?
It means that you're not livingup to your potential.
You're not even trying thethings that scare you.
And I'm huge on like,especially in this stage of my
life I'm 41 years old I am tiredof playing scared.
I'm tired of playing small.
(02:51):
I'm tired of not just going forit.
I mean, what's the worst that'sgoing to happen?
I mean, the absolute worst iskind of what happened to me.
I had to walk away from abusiness but and I lost it
because of that, that's like theworst.
But did it kill me?
Nope, I'm still here.
Did it hurt?
Yes.
Did I learn some massive lessons?
Absolutely.
Do I have some new things thatI'm going to take into my other
(03:12):
business ventures and into myfuture that I've learned from
you?
Bet you it's.
It's definitely.
I'm thankful.
Actually, I've learned a lot ofthings from the things that have
happened to me.
I've learned that there'sthings inside of me that needed
to be dealt with.
I've learned that I can bestubborn.
I've learned that I don't giveany easy.
I've learned to also berelentless and fight for what I
(03:32):
want and fight for what's bestfor me and my family and my
mental health.
And so I take all those momentsthat look like failure, that
look like loss, that look likestuff that maybe I shouldn't
have done, like, and I don'treally have regrets.
Regrets to me are, I think, abigger mistake.
If you want to call it amistake is a regret.
Don't have regrets.
(03:53):
Have those moments that youmaybe think are regrets and you
take them and you you analyzethem and you look at them and
then you ask yourself what can Itake from that?
Right, did your marriage fallapart?
What can you learn from that?
Did you lose a friendship?
What can you learn from that?
You know, did you physicallysomehow break your arm or
whatever?
What did you learn?
Maybe you don't do somethingstupid again, maybe you don't
(04:14):
hold the ladder like that, oryou know, maybe you watch where
you're walking, or maybe youslow down, or maybe you do that
safety checklist first, orwhatever it is.
I mean, obviously that's mostimportant, but there's these
things in life that I thinkhappen to us.
Sometimes we do them toourselves and you look at it and
you say, okay, well, that thatruined everything.
(04:35):
Well, I mean, it maybe did ruinsome stuff, but I guarantee you
, if you dig into it and you beadult about it and you, you know
, maybe seek some help for it orwhatever it is, it can turn
around, it can be used for good.
God will use these bad thingsfor good.
So it's important to look atmistakes and then look at them
(04:56):
with this critical mind of like,what feedback can I get from
this?
Right?
What is this thing revealing tome that I can improve on?
And maybe you know, if wehadn't gone through those things
, we wouldn't notice thosethings.
Oprah Winfrey says mistakes arestepping stones to wisdom
because you learn from them.
Right?
I don't.
I would like to actually talkto someone that hasn't learned
(05:16):
something from a mistake they'vemade.
I mean, it's literally assimple as a little kid who
touches the stove and getsburned.
Well, do we want him to do that?
No, did he learn something?
Yeah, be careful touching thestove.
It's hot, I mean there's.
It's a lesson this kid's goingto take with him further in life
, right?
So maybe you think about toyourself well, what does that?
(05:38):
What does that quote stand Likewhen you hear it?
What does that mean to you?
What are you learning from that?
Right, mistakes are steppingstones to wisdom.
And then I want to talk to youabout a few examples of some
common mistakes, so that maybeyou can look at them a little
different, see them different.
And then I want to talk abouthow to deal with failure.
So it says here consider aproduct launch that's flopped.
(06:00):
It's easy to see this as afailure, but instead it can be
viewed as valuable feedback.
Right, you want to analyze it.
And then you want to askyourself these things.
So in this specific example,it's going to fit, but I think
in life all these things fit.
So in this product launch, aswe're saying here, what did you
learn about the target market?
So why did your product fail?
Did you have the wrong marketin mind?
(06:21):
Did you have the wrong customer?
You know, do you know yourcustomer?
Do you do a customer avatar andsay, okay, who am I trying to
sell this product to?
So I'm looking in my studiohere and I'm seeing a water
bottle, right?
Well, I would think waterbottles can probably be sold to
most anybody.
I mean, young kids are takingthem to school, old people are
taking them to work, to the gym,I mean everywhere.
(06:41):
Who doesn't have a water bottlethese days?
You know, when I grew up as akid, we didn't have these water
bottles.
We went to the water fountainand shared germs with everyone
else and you could only get themon your break between classes.
And today, I mean I have thiswater bottle and I probably paid
30 bucks for this thing.
I mean, some of these Stanleysare $40, so whoever came up with
this water bottle, they've soldit to us in a way that's like
(07:04):
we got to have it, got to spend40 bucks on water.
I saw a meme the other day thattalked about that.
It was like here we are, we'repaying a lot of money for these
water bottles, and why?
Because we wanted to keep ouryou know water cold for three
days.
And I got to have it becauseit's cool, right?
Well, the guy was like why areyou not drinking your water fast
(07:25):
?
It has to be cold for threedays.
You should be replacing itfaster.
And that's the point.
I mean we're spending all thismoney because it's cool, because
this marketing campaign told uswe need to have it.
So if it fails, you need to lookat, like why did it fail?
Was there unforeseen problemswith the product?
Did it not really hold thewater cold for three days?
(07:47):
Did it leak?
Did the handle bust off tooeasy?
Did the colors fade in the sunLike what is it?
What went wrong with it?
Because these are opportunitiesto refine the product based on
real world data, rather thanjust assuming people didn't like
it right, or perhaps you putall this marketing campaign and
it didn't go as well as you hadhoped.
Right, it didn't get as manyviews or it didn't sell any
product.
(08:07):
Instead of viewing it as awaste of time and resources,
analyze the data right.
Why didn't it work?
Why didn't it reach the peoplewe wanted?
Was it too long?
Was it too short?
Was it boring?
Was it not interesting enough?
Did I put it on the wrongplatforms?
You know I've done some.
I've talked to some peopleabout TikTok and Instagram and
(08:27):
Facebook and typically Facebookis tending to be the older
generation.
Now I use it at 40.
I know people in their 30susing it but, like TikTok, tends
to be younger generation.
I actually just downloaded theapp.
We're doing some research hereon some marketing opportunities
at the barnyard and we want tosee, kind of, what the different
platforms are, and we're goingto test out some ads to see what
(08:50):
does better and where.
Now I would assume thatFacebook, maybe Instagram, is
going to be better than TikTok,but you never know.
I mean, if you're trying to getyour company out there and you
want views, you got to go wherethe views are right, and then
you're going to look at it andsay, well, it didn't work here
in this campaign.
So then what can I improve onthe next campaign?
We do Shorter video, longervideo, something that gets your
(09:13):
attention, maybe better hashtags, whatever it is, dig into it,
right.
So everything gathered fromthis experience is insightful
for crafting a more effectivecampaign in the future.
There is a quote from MayaAngelou and it says I can be
changed by what happens to me,but I refuse to be reduced by it
(09:39):
.
This quote is huge to mebecause I look at, I look at my
life and I think, okay,sometimes these quote-unquote
mistakes change you right and,unfortunately, sometimes certain
things, some failures,especially in business, in
relationships, they kind ofharden you a little bit right.
They change you in the factthat it could make you more
scared to talk to people, morescared to let people in.
(10:00):
You might close your heart offmore.
You might just get thisperception of like everybody is
terrible, nobody cares about me,blah, blah, blah, blah.
Right, there's all these thingsthat you can tell yourself that
are probably not true.
And if you tell yourself enoughthat these things are true,
then they become theseself-limiting beliefs, right?
So if you say everybody is outto get me, or nobody wants to be
(10:20):
my friend, or everybody's goingto hurt me, well, you're not
going to go out and try to makefriends because you're scared.
And in business you don't wantto play scared.
In life you don't want to playscared, right?
So for me, I have determined inmy life in the window business,
that all that mess that happenedyou know in past businesses
that I it just kind of it worked, but it wasn't exciting and I
(10:41):
ended up leaving or just closingthe business or whatever.
But it wasn't exciting and Iended up leaving or just closing
the business or whatever.
I refuse myself to be reducedby these things.
So my business didn't work out.
I refuse to give up on business, I refuse to give up on people.
I refuse to tell myself that Ican't do business because one
thing didn't work out.
I refuse to say everybody isnot good because they were all
(11:01):
mean to me.
I just refuse that.
I'm not going to stand invictim land and play that game.
I am going to stand as a victor.
I'm going to turn the yuck intogood right.
The Bible talks about the Lordwill turn beauty into ashes.
I'm sorry, that's not right.
I will turn ashes into beauty.
That's not.
God doesn't do that.
So God helps you.
He will turn the bad into goodright.
(11:23):
But if you get this mindset oflike I fail and I can't do it
and I'm so, I'm such a loser andthen you turn into other things
, which that'll lead you down apath to victim, and then you
become an addict and you throweverybody away and you push
everyone away and theneverything that's great about
life just goes away and I hatewatching that.
I think that's why I have such apassion for people, because I
(11:45):
see them playing small, I seethem playing scared and the more
I have fixed my own emotionaland mental stuff in the past
these regrets and these hurtsand these pains and these things
that kept me playing small attimes I've worked through a
bunch of them and then thatopens up this capacity for me to
say okay, these mistakes arenot defining for me.
(12:06):
These mistakes maybe changed me.
Sure, these mistakes and I keepusing the word mistakes just to
prove a point to you but theselessons is what I need to
transition that into is theselessons have taught me that it
can be really good and it can gobad, but it can be good again.
I mean, just because it changedonce doesn't mean it can't
change again.
Or just because this productdidn't work doesn't mean the
(12:29):
whole business is kaput.
Right, maybe there's a betterproduct or maybe you tweak that
product.
That's how we get greatinnovation, because you
constantly are working andchanging and fixing and
adjusting.
And I think that's howbusinesses you start it and most
people are like me.
They start, they don't knowwhat the hell they're doing, and
then you start and then you'relike okay, I have some success.
And then you learn well, ifyou're not careful with your
money, you're going to be out ofmoney.
(12:50):
Or if you treat your employeesbad, they're going to quit, or I
don't know.
If you don't treat yourbusiness partner good, it's not
going to work.
And so you have to startadjusting and tweaking things
and learning to be a betterleader.
And then you do more researchand you study and you take
classes or you go to conferencesand you start to see that like
there is hope for me right,there's hope for me.
I used to be a mess and I'm notthat way anymore.
(13:12):
I'm, you know, I've always beena hard worker and I've always
tried my best, but internally Ijust took everything on me and I
internalized everything thatit's my fault and I could do
better and this isn't workingbecause of me and and that's
that's a trippy place to be.
I mean, it's very limiting,it's very hurtful, it's very
hard to to push past that andI'm if you ask anyone that knows
(13:33):
me, I'm very, very strong and Ican push through and I can make
stuff happen.
But if you do that long enoughwithout dealing with it, it will
crumble you.
And that is kind of where Iended up after the window
business debacle.
It's like I just fell apart.
I mean I kept, I did businessand my business didn't hurt
Barnyard didn't hurt and myother stuff and I picked up new
business stuff and I tried newventures and I kept going.
(13:56):
But internally I was prettymessed up, I was broken, and I
think that's a testament to likewhere I am today.
Today, I don't know, it's beenlike a little over a year and a
half since I had to walk awayfrom the business and you know,
I wished it was very different,but it's just not, and so I'm
going to keep going.
I'm going to push harder as farand when I say push harder, I
(14:19):
don't like the mentality of likejust push through it and ignore
it and push it away and push itaway.
I of like just push through itand ignore it and push it away
and push it away.
I'm talking about I'm gonnapush through because I'm gonna
keep going to therapy, I'm gonnakeep discussing the hard stuff,
I'm gonna keep reaching out topeople that matter to me.
I'm gonna keep trying.
If things go awry, ifconversations don't go the way I
planned, I'm gonna face it andgo back and rehab another
conversation and the people thatare in my life that I care
(14:40):
about and that's all part of themistakes, because sometimes we
say things that maybe we didn'tmean or came off wrong or the
other person perceived itdifferently, and I'm not the
type that's going to be like,okay, well, you can just be mad.
(15:01):
No, I want to fix it, becauseif I mess it up, let's fix it.
Or if you hurt my feelings,instead of just being upset and
not talking to you and basicallydoing the silent treatment,
it's going to get you nowhere.
All that's going to do is ruinyour friendship, your marriage,
your business.
You have to face it and youtalk it through and I'm telling
you there's so much relief andhappiness that comes with that,
even if it turns out like we'rejust not meant to be business
(15:23):
partners or we're not meant tobe friends or whatever.
Talk through it so that way youend on a positive note.
You can end with at least peacein your heart.
You can end with like I wishyou well.
I don't want to hurt you, youknow, I hope life's good to you.
That is so much better thanending in a place of like I
can't talk to you and I hate youand I whatever, like it's just
not good for you, it's not goodfor them.
And so there's all these thingsthat we can reframe right, okay
(15:49):
.
So I want to talk to you aboutthis reframing.
Dealing with failure is tough,but it's a crucial part of
growth and learning.
So how do we navigate it and Ihave kind of a list here that we
created.
I want to make sure I getthrough as much of it as I can
and hopefully don't missanything.
So I'm going to jump betweenboth of these.
So reframing mistakes.
So you want to acknowledge andaccept it.
(16:10):
So it says it's natural to feelupset, frustrated or
disappointed when things don'tgo as planned.
You need to allow yourself toprocess those emotions and it's
okay to feel down as long as youdon't let those feelings
control you.
You have to take responsibilityfor what you did, because
denial will not help you learnor grow.
(16:32):
You have to accept the errorsas part of the progress, right?
So it's okay to acknowledgelike I'm always just going to
refer back to me and I hope, asyou're listening to this, you're
thinking about whatever you'regoing through or whatever you're
trying to process and you kindof put this on yourself.
But for me, because I'm the onetalking here, it took me a while
to acknowledge how angry I was,how full of resentment I was
(16:57):
right for the things that hadhappened.
I I felt like I put myself intoa pretzel trying to figure out
how to fix it and unfortunately,as I've said in the past.
There's two sides.
Some people are not in the sameplace you are and I think
sometimes people can't meet youthere, unfortunately.
And that's okay, I've learnedit's okay because they're just
(17:18):
not where they're supposed,where I need them to be, or
where they're not in a placewhere we can move forward,
unfortunately.
But for me and this is where I'mtalking to you is you've got to
face what you're feeling.
You know you can't control theother person.
You can't get them to movethrough things if they don't
want to control the other person.
You can't get them to movethrough things if they don't
want to.
You can't get them to work onthings if you don't want to.
But you can acknowledge yourown feelings and I think that's
(17:44):
important.
So and that is a lot of what Ididn't do in the past I would
stuff it down and be like Ican't even be mad at this person
, because then it's just goingto cause more problems and I'd
push it away and then somethingelse would happen and then I'd
be, you know, more hurt orwhatever, and I would like in my
mind say I'm really angry, butthen I push it down and it's a
nope, just got to keep going andI may address it a little bit,
but I ultimately would give upon it Cause I'm like it's just
going to push them away orwhatever and instead I need to.
(18:05):
It took me a long time torealize like I'm angry, but
what's below the surface of that?
Well, I'm anger is usually hurt, right.
And why am I hurt?
What's the reason I'm hurt?
Am I frustrated?
In my case, I was frustrated.
I was very disappointed.
I had too high of expectations.
That happens, right, because Ihold myself to a high standard.
(18:26):
But not everybody's like me.
Not everybody has the samedesires and goals and values,
and so when you kind of projectthat onto someone else and they
can't hit it, it's going todisappoint me.
I would imagine if they careabout you, it's really going to
disappoint themselves becausethey're trying.
I would see that in my business.
I would see my business partnertrying, unfortunately I don't
(18:49):
know, through all of it.
I think it just got too much atthe end and I don't think that
person was in a place to to moveforward.
And so for me realizing that,like I can't control this stuff
anymore, I have to face it,because it just builds so much
resentment that then it's like awall.
You can't even get over itright, and then you kind of have
to start to analyze it, andthat's kind of what I was just
(19:12):
talking about taking a step backand dissect what went wrong.
You want to look at the factorsthat led to the outcome.
So then it's like, depending onwhatever it is, was it a lack
of research?
Was it poor planning?
Was it just a person that isnot in a good place and you
can't really move past it?
Was it you didn't have enoughmoney, like you didn't open in
the right location?
Maybe I don't know.
(19:34):
Maybe you did a mobile and youshould have done more of a
stationary business right.
Or maybe you did a businesswhere you put it in a location
that was not good and maybe itwould have been better in a
mobile business for, like, acoffee shop or whatever.
So you just got to kind of lookat that and say, okay, what
went wrong?
And for me, with my pastbusiness I've had a lot of time
to do that and I can see a lotof spaces that it went wrong.
(19:55):
Now I can't go back and changethat or fix that.
I wished I could.
It's not how it works, but nowI know, going forward in my
current business and my currentventures, if there's other
things in the future, I knowwhat to avoid and what not to do
this time and remember to bereally objective.
You know, look at like I sawthat I did this, but how could I
(20:16):
look at it differently?
How could I have done thatdifferently?
Because you want to understandthe why so you can prevent it
from happening in the future.
And then you want to kind offind lessons.
Again, that's part of whatwe're talking about identifying
the key takeaways.
What insights can you draw fromthe situation?
How do you apply these lessonsgoing forward?
And then you want to implementthe change right, use the
(20:38):
lessons learned to makeimprovement.
You want to adjust yourstrategies, refine your
processes, apply what you'velearned to future projects.
So I work with some coachingclients and I'm noticing, like a
lot of small businesses andthis is not, this is standard I
think it happens to most smallbusinesses because you get going
and sales are most importantbecause you got to have money
coming in.
Then you start getting thesales and then you start to grow
(21:00):
and then it just kind ofbecomes mayhem and you're trying
to keep up and then there's nosystem for problems, there's no
system to track orders, there'sno system to track clients, and
I see it a lot where thesebusinesses they're just
struggling because they're likethe money's coming in but it's
all going back out and it'schaos and I'm stressed out.
And so that's where it worksgood to sit down with a coach
like me, because I'm looking topdown, I'm not so emotionally
(21:22):
invested in the business whereyou are, so I can start to see,
like, okay, I can see from theoutside the chaos, I can kind of
look through it, because you'reso knee deep in it.
There's that saying you can'tsee the forest through the trees
.
That's why a coach like me isgreat, because I can come in, I
have to spend a little time inyour business, but I can see,
like, okay, you guys are notcommunicating, clearly, your
(21:42):
systems are a wreck, or maybeyou don't even have any.
Um, I can see that, like, youdon't have a budget, you don't,
you don't know your numbers,whatever.
And so then me and you can sitdown and start going through
these things and saying, okay,it's not just here's homework,
take it back.
Because the problem is whenyou're so deep in that and
you're so stressed out andwhatever, you don't have the
time to say, okay, I'm taking anhour to work on this.
(22:04):
But if you're working with me,I'm going to say we're going to
meet, you're going to respect mytime, you're going to actually
show up, and then we're going towork through it together and
we're going to start knockingthese things off the list and
over time it does take time tofix problems.
You can start to see, okay, wehave a system, this is running
smoother.
Or I have a budget.
I can see like we're not makingany money because we're
(22:25):
spending it all, or we're notcharging enough so we have to
raise prices.
And together we start to workthrough that.
And that's why a coach isreally great.
So if if you don't have one, Irecommend it.
I'm a business coach.
There's tons of businesscoaches out there.
It's really good to see,because then I also I've been
through this stuff.
I run my own business, I runmultiple businesses, I've had
business partners, I havebusinesses I run by myself.
(22:47):
I mean I just I've seen a lotand I feel for people in
business who love their business.
They're trying to do right, youknow, for the customer and for
their families and they're juststruggling because it's a lot.
And I've been through a lot andI've built businesses and I
just know how it works and I cansee it.
Now.
I don't run corporations, I'mnot a coach for a corporate
(23:08):
person, I'm just I don't runbillion dollar business.
I mean I have no idea what thateven looks like, but you know,
I would say a business startingout all the way up to a few
million dollars.
I mean I've got a pretty goodbusiness in the barnyard and I
kind of I've built the systems.
I mean window cleaning.
We built all the systems fromscratch.
Unfortunately, the systems werenot the problem, it was more
just the people trying to getalong, which is the hardest part
(23:31):
.
People, you know we can't makeeach other do what we want to do
and sometimes our values get alittle mixed up and our lives
change and we go in differentdirections.
So that's all part of that.
And then let's see here I wantto see which one I want to go to
next.
I would say the next thingwould be the implementing, which
again I was talking about withthe coach, using the lessons
(23:53):
that you've learned to makeimprovements.
So would be the implementingwhich again I was talking about
with the coach using the lessonsthat you've learned to make
improvements.
So you're adjusting yourstrategies, refining the process
right what we just talked aboutand then start applying it,
start putting it into practice.
Because if we just talk aboutit which I feel like happened in
my business we talked aboutstuff until finally the showing
up just didn't happen anymore,but we talked about it and then
we just as much as I would pushto implement, implement.
(24:19):
It takes the people in yourteam to implement those things,
because I can't be everywhereand so you have to get buy-in
and get the people on board.
And then you want to.
I would say, kind of sit downwith your team and share the
lessons you've learned, sharethem with the team or the
network.
It not only helps others learnfrom your experience, but also
solidifies your ownunderstanding of it.
And even just kind of talkinghere on this, this platform, my
(24:40):
podcast, it reminds me of like,yeah, I mean I've got some stuff
to keep working on and I'vedone, I've made some big
progress and I wished the onlywell.
I won't go too much into this,but the only team member I
wished I could share this withwas my old business partner.
I wish we were at a place wherewe could sit down and just like
talk about it and not talkabout it because there's any
(25:02):
saving anymore, it's too late.
But I think there's so muchgrowth in discussing the past
and not not coming back of likeyou did this and blame, but like
the revelations.
There's healing and growth inthat and I just that's the one
thing I wish was different.
I wish this person would bewilling to talk to me and in a
place of like, not condemnationand blame, but growth and change
(25:23):
.
Because, man, I've learned somuch and, you know, no one else
knows that except for the peoplethat were in it with you, and
so I do hope and pray that Godwill somehow align that someday
and it'll work out and change.
But you know, for now I'm justgoing to keep figuring it out
for me and keep trying my bestto change.
Unfortunately I can't go back tomy company and do that because
it's not my company anymore, butI do it currently in my the
(25:44):
barnyard business I and it'sreally helped me in coaching
because I can see the strugglesand you know, sometimes it's
hard to take criticism,sometimes it's hard to see the
things that you're personallydoing that you know other people
see, but they're too afraid totell you.
And that's one thing about abusiness coach if they're a good
(26:04):
one, they will tell you to yourface, like you're being really
hard on your people or you'retreating them wrong, or you're
being too hard on yourself, ormaybe you're not taking any time
for yourself or whatever.
And they will tell you to yourface some of the things that
they're seeing so that you canstart to make adjustments.
That is the most invaluablething ever, because that is also
talking about that.
In my past experience again inmy business partner, especially
(26:31):
the first few years, I learnedso much from this person because
he was a bit of a.
He wasn't a big talker, butwhen he would talk I would
listen because he didn't say aton right and I saw things that
I he would tell me a lot I was,I was working too much and I
need to relax a little bit andhave some more fun.
And and there was some thingsthere that, like I can really
(26:53):
dig into there was nuggets ofgoodness and some, and there was
times he told me I wasn't in myother businesses, I wasn't
charging enough, or he wouldtell me how valuable I was, and
I don't know.
Those are things I am sothankful for, because not
everybody was telling me thatand I wasn't being good on
myself.
And so having that kind ofmirror if you will, that will
tell you the truth is is reallyI don't know it's really
(27:15):
valuable.
So, anyway, I'll continue.
So once you do that, you want toset some new goals.
It says failure doesn't meanyou should quit Never, quit
Never, please, never give up.
Relentlessness and I guess justdesire keeps me going, because
I'm like, I'm not going to takethat.
I'm not a no person, I don'tlike no, I want to find a way
(27:36):
around it.
There's gotta be a better way.
You don't want to be my friend?
Why?
How can we fix it Right?
Or you don't want to buy myproduct Okay, how can we maybe
change that?
Or, uh, you can't know.
I think that's just a fightthat's in me and I don't like no
(27:57):
.
So if you, if you're a noperson, let's talk, because I'd
like to get around that untilmaybe, or yeah, so there's a
different way, or maybe I justdon't work with a company, but
it's.
I think there's just got to bea fight in you that you want to
say that's so.
Then, talking about goals, breakthem down into smaller,
achievable steps so the journeyfeels more manageable.
(28:18):
Maintain a growth mindset.
Embrace the belief that skillsand abilities can improve with
effort and learning.
Those who view challenges asopportunities for growth are
more resilient in the face offailure.
And then it talks about seekingsupport.
Don't do it alone.
Talk to friends, talk to family, talk to mentors, talk to your
(28:40):
business partner.
Talk to your employees to apoint where you can Now some
stuff you can't talk to themabout because they need to not
know every little detail of yourbusiness.
That could cause some issues.
But if you can find otherbusiness owners, talk to a coach
.
I mean that's if it's businessstuff.
Talk to a coach, right, or amentor.
If it's personal stuff, talk toa therapist.
(29:03):
Talk to someone you can trust,someone that doesn't really have
fight in the game but they careabout you improving, if I would
say that they usually offerfresh perspective, encouragement
and helpful advice.
And then really take care ofyourself.
During tough times, it'simportant to take care of
yourself, your mental andphysical well-being.
Get to the gym, go for walks,mental health, you know growth
(29:24):
books, yoga, there's therapists,there's counselors.
There's so much stuff out therethat if you would just reach
out for help.
I see people that I knowthey're struggling and they just
they think they have to do itby themselves and that's
probably a trust issue, I'm sure, but they're afraid of getting
hurt.
But I wish they would just likejust trust and just let people
(29:47):
be people.
I mean, we're not perfect, butthere is good people out there
and when you find them you hangon to them because they're
you're going to need them.
I mean, life can be hard, it'sa battle sometimes and I think
with good people behind you itlessens the burden.
And then the Lord.
Talk to the Lord.
If you're a believer I hope youare, but I mean the Lord.
I've let some stuff out to himand I trust that there's some
(30:09):
stuff that's not good right nowthat he's going to continue to
work on and will make betterbecause he's a faithful God.
You always want to eat well,right, you want to exercise, you
want to get plenty of sleep andyou want to keep your mind
clear and focused on the biggerpicture, and that's something I
was telling one of my coachingclients the other day was, since
(30:29):
I've started working on mymental health and my emotional
health in the past and traumaand all this stuff.
It's like the more I get thatout, the less heavy my emotional
baggage is and the more clear Ithink every day, the faster I
get stuff done Like I'm.
I'm so mentally clear right nowbecause I'm just cruising
through things and I'm just I'mnot carrying the weight of all
this stuff.
It's not there anymore and I'mso thankful for that, because
(30:53):
there was a time when I couldn't, I had no capacity left.
I was so emotionally bankruptand I was mentally drained and I
was physically exhausted andthings took so much longer and
things went awry because Icouldn't, I couldn't hold the
bag anymore.
You know, the bag was bustingat the seams and now that that
(31:13):
barrel of mine is kind ofstarting to empty out, it's so
refreshing and life is so muchmore exciting and fun again and
I can enjoy what I'm doing andenjoy the moments.
And then you know, don't letfear and failure stop you.
It can sometimes paralyze you.
Remember that every successfulperson has experienced failure
along the way.
What matters is theirpersistence and the fact that
(31:36):
they bounce back right.
Don't ever let failure and Ibelieve a devil likes to push
that on you, like you failed,this didn't work, this
relationship didn't work,whatever.
And then you go in a hole andyou hide.
And man, don't do that.
Come out swinging, come outproud.
I mean, be proud that you tried, even if you failed.
Your business didn't make it,you didn't have the money and it
didn't work or I don't know.
(31:57):
You've learned those lessons.
You took a swing at the batright, like if you just go up
there and never swing at theball, well, that's pretty sad.
I mean you don't even have achance to fail because you
didn't try.
That's harder for me not tryingthan failing.
I mean, what do I really carewhat these people think as I'm
getting older?
That's really true and that'snot saying that I just go and
hurt people.
That's not what I'm talkingabout.
(32:18):
But I don't know.
I'm actually looking at a signright now that's in my coaching
studio and it says hustle untilyour haters ask if you're hiring
right, because you have peoplearen't going to be, they're not
going to like you, no matterwhat you do, they're going to
always, you know, be against you.
And I kind of like that.
It's kind of cheeky, becauseI'm like I'm going to hustle and
(32:39):
do it in the way that God willhonor it.
So much of these people can'tdeny that I did something great.
Right Like I don't care if theydon't like it, but at the same
time, maybe it'll inspire themto quit being such a putz and
get off their butt and dosomething.
And that's my next point is keeptrying.
Most importantly, don't give up.
Every time you pick yourself up, you grow stronger.
(33:01):
The road to success is rarely astraight path, and persistence
is the key.
And remember that sometimesthings fail, it's okay.
The key is learning from yourmistakes and using them to
improve.
So I want to tell you a storythat's kind of interesting.
It says Starbucks made amisstep when it initially tried
to scale too quickly in the2000s, the company faced
(33:23):
criticism for its overexpansionand decline in coffee quality.
However, they took thesecriticisms seriously, redefined
their business model and focusedon their core values, and this
led to revamping the brand.
And then, all of a sudden, thisresurgence in popularity rose
up, and now look where they are.
So I mean, I think for me, mymisstep was I guess it would be
(33:52):
not having clear boundaries, notstaying in my lane, and I don't
know it's.
It's a hard one for me because Idon't think I'd take any of it
back.
You know it's hard that my egois like I would never do it
again.
That's not true.
I had so many good experiences.
I wish it was in a verydifferent place.
I wish that business would begrowing so good right now.
(34:13):
But you know you can't live inthe past, you can't live with
regret.
And so just remember, cultivatethat growth mindset, get that
feedback, reflect and thencelebrate the wins.
Man recognize and celebrate theimprovements you made as a
result of learning from yourlessons.
They'll keep you motivated andfocus on continual growth.
And I think doing things likethis telling people, get out
(34:34):
there and be a platform of themistakes you've made and I'm
putting it out there I freaking,messed up man.
I didn't do everything great,but I've learned a lot and I
think my heart for people isstill there.
My heart to help people isstill there.
And these mistakes, they're notthe end of the road, they're
just the valuable detour on thepath to success.
So this quote from Trevor Noahsays mistakes are the dots that
(34:58):
connect our experiences andshape the narrative of our lives
.
Your lessons are your pivotalmoments that lead to growth,
resilience and creativity.
And so the last thing I'm goingto say before I end this is I
was there's, I don't know.
It's like a video on YouTube youcan watch, but it's Tombstone
and it's got great music behindit, but it's talking about the
(35:18):
dash and it's saying that lifeis the dash right.
So on your tombstone it's likeI was born in 1983, I died 2045,
whatever it is, and there'sthat dash in between and it's
like what is, what is the dash?
Well, that is, that's your life, that's your experiences,
that's the happiness, themoments of regret.
That's that's all these things,right, and the dash is what
matters in life, because youdon't I apologize, I'm actually
(35:43):
getting emotional talking aboutthis but the dash is like that's
all you get, man.
I mean, some people get 20 orsome get 50, some get 100.
But what you do in the middle iswhat matters, right.
The people that you love andaffect, and the children you
raise, and the spouse that yougrow old with, and the
businesses you raise up, and thepeople that work for your
(36:04):
business.
That's what matters, the stuffin the middle.
So don't sweat the small stuff.
You made a mistake in themiddle.
Keep going.
There's so much life yet.
Don't give up and don't live inregret, because everything is a
lesson, everything is somethingyou will learn, and so I just I
hope you think about that today.
(36:25):
So, if you enjoyed this episode,don't forget to subscribe, like
, share, you know, do all of it.
Like my page, share my page.
I am on all different platforms.
I'm on Facebook, instagram,iheartradio, apple Podcasts,
youtube.
I will be adding video here inthe next few weeks.
I have a good friend of minewho's going to come in and help
me with that, so we'll have thatsoon.
(36:47):
I challenge you to keep pushingforward and turning those
mistakes into mastery.
Thank you so much for listeningtoday.
We're growing quickly and I'mso thankful for all of you
listening today.
We're growing quickly and I'mso thankful for all of you.
Please share your ownexperiences and insights by
visitingwwwlightupyourbusinesspodcastcom
.
And thank you and you guys havea great day and I will see you
next time.
And remember, in the world ofbusiness, every success story
(37:14):
begins with a passionate dreamand ends with a strategic
billion dollar handshake.
Stay ambitious, stay innovativeand keep making those deals
that reshape tomorrow.
Thank you all for tuning in anduntil next time remember.
Proverbs 3.3 says let love andfaithfulness never leave you.
(37:36):
Bind them around your neck,write them on the tablet of your
heart.
That way you will win favor anda good name in the sight of God
and man.
And remember.
If you like what you heardtoday, click the follow button
so you never miss an episode.
Welcome to the Light Up your Business
podcast, the show where we divedeep into the world of small
businesses.
I'm your host, TammyHershberger, and each episode
will bring you inspiring stories, expert insights and practical
tips to help your small businessthrive.
Whether you're an entrepreneurjust starting out or a seasoned
business owner, this podcast isyour go-to source for success in
(00:21):
the small business world.
Let's get started to source forsuccess in the small business
world.
Let's get started.
Hi everyone, I want to welcomeyou back to another episode of
Light Up your Business podcast.
My name is Tammy Hershberger.
It's been a minute.
I took a little break fromrecording.
It's winter and I'm freezingand I just decided to do some
(00:44):
other stuff and I am back.
I've got a bunch of episodeswe're going to knock out and
today's episode.
I want to talk to you guys aboutturning mistakes into mastery
and that's called reframingfailures into lessons.
I think I've talked about thisa little bit in the past, but I
don't like calling mistakesfailures.
I used to do that.
With help of therapy and a lotof personal growth, I have
learned that there really is nomistakes in life.
(01:04):
Mistakes are really justlessons.
I mean, some lessons are morecostly than others, but we learn
something If you don't.
You got problems here becauseyou should be learning from the
things that you're failing at orthe things that you didn't do
right, and hopefully you dobetter next time.
So to me, it's crucial forevery business leader,
(01:25):
entrepreneur and anyone with abig dream to learn that you've
got to reframe these things.
We're talking about reframingmistakes in business into
valuable lessons.
So if you've ever felt likeyour latest blunder might be the
end of the world, I have beenthere.
Stay tuned, because we're aboutto turn those mistakes into
mastery.
So we all make mistakes,especially in business.
From failed product launches tounsuccessful marketing
(01:48):
campaigns, it's easy to getdiscouraged when things don't go
according to plan, but what ifI told you that mistakes are
actually golden opportunities indisguise?
Today, we'll discuss how toreframe those inevitable errors
into powerful lessons that drivegrowth and innovation.
So let's talk about the natureof mistakes.
So if you start byacknowledging that a fundamental
(02:10):
truth is mistakes are a part ofevery successful business
journey, I guarantee you, if youtalk to all the big guys who
own all the big, hugecorporations, they will tell you
that mistakes happen, failurehappens.
Not every business ventureworks, not every plan you make
works.
I mean, that's in life, right,and if you're going to make
(02:30):
mistakes, you're probably notpushing the envelope enough.
I would say you're probablyplaying small.
What does playing small mean?
It means that you're not livingup to your potential.
You're not even trying thethings that scare you.
And I'm huge on like,especially in this stage of my
life I'm 41 years old I am tiredof playing scared.
I'm tired of playing small.
(02:51):
I'm tired of not just going forit.
I mean, what's the worst that'sgoing to happen?
I mean, the absolute worst iskind of what happened to me.
I had to walk away from abusiness but and I lost it
because of that, that's like theworst.
But did it kill me?
Nope, I'm still here.
Did it hurt?
Yes.
Did I learn some massive lessons?
Absolutely.
Do I have some new things thatI'm going to take into my other
(03:12):
business ventures and into myfuture that I've learned from
you?
Bet you it's.
It's definitely.
I'm thankful.
Actually, I've learned a lot ofthings from the things that have
happened to me.
I've learned that there'sthings inside of me that needed
to be dealt with.
I've learned that I can bestubborn.
I've learned that I don't giveany easy.
I've learned to also berelentless and fight for what I
(03:32):
want and fight for what's bestfor me and my family and my
mental health.
And so I take all those momentsthat look like failure, that
look like loss, that look likestuff that maybe I shouldn't
have done, like, and I don'treally have regrets.
Regrets to me are, I think, abigger mistake.
If you want to call it amistake is a regret.
Don't have regrets.
(03:53):
Have those moments that youmaybe think are regrets and you
take them and you you analyzethem and you look at them and
then you ask yourself what can Itake from that?
Right, did your marriage fallapart?
What can you learn from that?
Did you lose a friendship?
What can you learn from that?
You know, did you physicallysomehow break your arm or
whatever?
What did you learn?
Maybe you don't do somethingstupid again, maybe you don't
(04:14):
hold the ladder like that, oryou know, maybe you watch where
you're walking, or maybe youslow down, or maybe you do that
safety checklist first, orwhatever it is.
I mean, obviously that's mostimportant, but there's these
things in life that I thinkhappen to us.
Sometimes we do them toourselves and you look at it and
you say, okay, well, that thatruined everything.
(04:35):
Well, I mean, it maybe did ruinsome stuff, but I guarantee you
, if you dig into it and you beadult about it and you, you know
, maybe seek some help for it orwhatever it is, it can turn
around, it can be used for good.
God will use these bad thingsfor good.
So it's important to look atmistakes and then look at them
(04:56):
with this critical mind of like,what feedback can I get from
this?
Right?
What is this thing revealing tome that I can improve on?
And maybe you know, if wehadn't gone through those things
, we wouldn't notice thosethings.
Oprah Winfrey says mistakes arestepping stones to wisdom
because you learn from them.
Right?
I don't.
I would like to actually talkto someone that hasn't learned
(05:16):
something from a mistake they'vemade.
I mean, it's literally assimple as a little kid who
touches the stove and getsburned.
Well, do we want him to do that?
No, did he learn something?
Yeah, be careful touching thestove.
It's hot, I mean there's.
It's a lesson this kid's goingto take with him further in life
, right?
So maybe you think about toyourself well, what does that?
(05:38):
What does that quote stand Likewhen you hear it?
What does that mean to you?
What are you learning from that?
Right, mistakes are steppingstones to wisdom.
And then I want to talk to youabout a few examples of some
common mistakes, so that maybeyou can look at them a little
different, see them different.
And then I want to talk abouthow to deal with failure.
So it says here consider aproduct launch that's flopped.
(06:00):
It's easy to see this as afailure, but instead it can be
viewed as valuable feedback.
Right, you want to analyze it.
And then you want to askyourself these things.
So in this specific example,it's going to fit, but I think
in life all these things fit.
So in this product launch, aswe're saying here, what did you
learn about the target market?
So why did your product fail?
Did you have the wrong marketin mind?
(06:21):
Did you have the wrong customer?
You know, do you know yourcustomer?
Do you do a customer avatar andsay, okay, who am I trying to
sell this product to?
So I'm looking in my studiohere and I'm seeing a water
bottle, right?
Well, I would think waterbottles can probably be sold to
most anybody.
I mean, young kids are takingthem to school, old people are
taking them to work, to the gym,I mean everywhere.
(06:41):
Who doesn't have a water bottlethese days?
You know, when I grew up as akid, we didn't have these water
bottles.
We went to the water fountainand shared germs with everyone
else and you could only get themon your break between classes.
And today, I mean I have thiswater bottle and I probably paid
30 bucks for this thing.
I mean, some of these Stanleysare $40, so whoever came up with
this water bottle, they've soldit to us in a way that's like
(07:04):
we got to have it, got to spend40 bucks on water.
I saw a meme the other day thattalked about that.
It was like here we are, we'repaying a lot of money for these
water bottles, and why?
Because we wanted to keep ouryou know water cold for three
days.
And I got to have it becauseit's cool, right?
Well, the guy was like why areyou not drinking your water fast
(07:25):
?
It has to be cold for threedays.
You should be replacing itfaster.
And that's the point.
I mean we're spending all thismoney because it's cool, because
this marketing campaign told uswe need to have it.
So if it fails, you need to lookat, like why did it fail?
Was there unforeseen problemswith the product?
Did it not really hold thewater cold for three days?
(07:47):
Did it leak?
Did the handle bust off tooeasy?
Did the colors fade in the sunLike what is it?
What went wrong with it?
Because these are opportunitiesto refine the product based on
real world data, rather thanjust assuming people didn't like
it right, or perhaps you putall this marketing campaign and
it didn't go as well as you hadhoped.
Right, it didn't get as manyviews or it didn't sell any
product.
(08:07):
Instead of viewing it as awaste of time and resources,
analyze the data right.
Why didn't it work?
Why didn't it reach the peoplewe wanted?
Was it too long?
Was it too short?
Was it boring?
Was it not interesting enough?
Did I put it on the wrongplatforms?
You know I've done some.
I've talked to some peopleabout TikTok and Instagram and
(08:27):
Facebook and typically Facebookis tending to be the older
generation.
Now I use it at 40.
I know people in their 30susing it but, like TikTok, tends
to be younger generation.
I actually just downloaded theapp.
We're doing some research hereon some marketing opportunities
at the barnyard and we want tosee, kind of, what the different
platforms are, and we're goingto test out some ads to see what
(08:50):
does better and where.
Now I would assume thatFacebook, maybe Instagram, is
going to be better than TikTok,but you never know.
I mean, if you're trying to getyour company out there and you
want views, you got to go wherethe views are right, and then
you're going to look at it andsay, well, it didn't work here
in this campaign.
So then what can I improve onthe next campaign?
We do Shorter video, longervideo, something that gets your
(09:13):
attention, maybe better hashtags, whatever it is, dig into it,
right.
So everything gathered fromthis experience is insightful
for crafting a more effectivecampaign in the future.
There is a quote from MayaAngelou and it says I can be
changed by what happens to me,but I refuse to be reduced by it
(09:39):
.
This quote is huge to mebecause I look at, I look at my
life and I think, okay,sometimes these quote-unquote
mistakes change you right and,unfortunately, sometimes certain
things, some failures,especially in business, in
relationships, they kind ofharden you a little bit right.
They change you in the factthat it could make you more
scared to talk to people, morescared to let people in.
(10:00):
You might close your heart offmore.
You might just get thisperception of like everybody is
terrible, nobody cares about me,blah, blah, blah, blah.
Right, there's all these thingsthat you can tell yourself that
are probably not true.
And if you tell yourself enoughthat these things are true,
then they become theseself-limiting beliefs, right?
So if you say everybody is outto get me, or nobody wants to be
(10:20):
my friend, or everybody's goingto hurt me, well, you're not
going to go out and try to makefriends because you're scared.
And in business you don't wantto play scared.
In life you don't want to playscared, right?
So for me, I have determined inmy life in the window business,
that all that mess that happenedyou know in past businesses
that I it just kind of it worked, but it wasn't exciting and I
(10:41):
ended up leaving or just closingthe business or whatever.
But it wasn't exciting and Iended up leaving or just closing
the business or whatever.
I refuse myself to be reducedby these things.
So my business didn't work out.
I refuse to give up on business, I refuse to give up on people.
I refuse to tell myself that Ican't do business because one
thing didn't work out.
I refuse to say everybody isnot good because they were all
(11:01):
mean to me.
I just refuse that.
I'm not going to stand invictim land and play that game.
I am going to stand as a victor.
I'm going to turn the yuck intogood right.
The Bible talks about the Lordwill turn beauty into ashes.
I'm sorry, that's not right.
I will turn ashes into beauty.
That's not.
God doesn't do that.
So God helps you.
He will turn the bad into goodright.
(11:23):
But if you get this mindset oflike I fail and I can't do it
and I'm so, I'm such a loser andthen you turn into other things
, which that'll lead you down apath to victim, and then you
become an addict and you throweverybody away and you push
everyone away and theneverything that's great about
life just goes away and I hatewatching that.
I think that's why I have such apassion for people, because I
(11:45):
see them playing small, I seethem playing scared and the more
I have fixed my own emotionaland mental stuff in the past
these regrets and these hurtsand these pains and these things
that kept me playing small attimes I've worked through a
bunch of them and then thatopens up this capacity for me to
say okay, these mistakes arenot defining for me.
(12:06):
These mistakes maybe changed me.
Sure, these mistakes and I keepusing the word mistakes just to
prove a point to you but theselessons is what I need to
transition that into is theselessons have taught me that it
can be really good and it can gobad, but it can be good again.
I mean, just because it changedonce doesn't mean it can't
change again.
Or just because this productdidn't work doesn't mean the
(12:29):
whole business is kaput.
Right, maybe there's a betterproduct or maybe you tweak that
product.
That's how we get greatinnovation, because you
constantly are working andchanging and fixing and
adjusting.
And I think that's howbusinesses you start it and most
people are like me.
They start, they don't knowwhat the hell they're doing, and
then you start and then you'relike okay, I have some success.
And then you learn well, ifyou're not careful with your
money, you're going to be out ofmoney.
(12:50):
Or if you treat your employeesbad, they're going to quit, or I
don't know.
If you don't treat yourbusiness partner good, it's not
going to work.
And so you have to startadjusting and tweaking things
and learning to be a betterleader.
And then you do more researchand you study and you take
classes or you go to conferencesand you start to see that like
there is hope for me right,there's hope for me.
I used to be a mess and I'm notthat way anymore.
(13:12):
I'm, you know, I've always beena hard worker and I've always
tried my best, but internally Ijust took everything on me and I
internalized everything thatit's my fault and I could do
better and this isn't workingbecause of me and and that's
that's a trippy place to be.
I mean, it's very limiting,it's very hurtful, it's very
hard to to push past that andI'm if you ask anyone that knows
(13:33):
me, I'm very, very strong and Ican push through and I can make
stuff happen.
But if you do that long enoughwithout dealing with it, it will
crumble you.
And that is kind of where Iended up after the window
business debacle.
It's like I just fell apart.
I mean I kept, I did businessand my business didn't hurt
Barnyard didn't hurt and myother stuff and I picked up new
business stuff and I tried newventures and I kept going.
(13:56):
But internally I was prettymessed up, I was broken, and I
think that's a testament to likewhere I am today.
Today, I don't know, it's beenlike a little over a year and a
half since I had to walk awayfrom the business and you know,
I wished it was very different,but it's just not, and so I'm
going to keep going.
I'm going to push harder as farand when I say push harder, I
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don't like the mentality of likejust push through it and ignore
it and push it away and push itaway.
I of like just push through itand ignore it and push it away
and push it away.
I'm talking about I'm gonnapush through because I'm gonna
keep going to therapy, I'm gonnakeep discussing the hard stuff,
I'm gonna keep reaching out topeople that matter to me.
I'm gonna keep trying.
If things go awry, ifconversations don't go the way I
planned, I'm gonna face it andgo back and rehab another
conversation and the people thatare in my life that I care
(14:40):
about and that's all part of themistakes, because sometimes we
say things that maybe we didn'tmean or came off wrong or the
other person perceived itdifferently, and I'm not the
type that's going to be like,okay, well, you can just be mad.
(15:01):
No, I want to fix it, becauseif I mess it up, let's fix it.
Or if you hurt my feelings,instead of just being upset and
not talking to you and basicallydoing the silent treatment,
it's going to get you nowhere.
All that's going to do is ruinyour friendship, your marriage,
your business.
You have to face it and youtalk it through and I'm telling
you there's so much relief andhappiness that comes with that,
even if it turns out like we'rejust not meant to be business
(15:23):
partners or we're not meant tobe friends or whatever.
Talk through it so that way youend on a positive note.
You can end with at least peacein your heart.
You can end with like I wishyou well.
I don't want to hurt you, youknow, I hope life's good to you.
That is so much better thanending in a place of like I
can't talk to you and I hate youand I whatever, like it's just
not good for you, it's not goodfor them.
And so there's all these thingsthat we can reframe right, okay
(15:49):
.
So I want to talk to you aboutthis reframing.
Dealing with failure is tough,but it's a crucial part of
growth and learning.
So how do we navigate it and Ihave kind of a list here that we
created.
I want to make sure I getthrough as much of it as I can
and hopefully don't missanything.
So I'm going to jump betweenboth of these.
So reframing mistakes.
So you want to acknowledge andaccept it.
(16:10):
So it says it's natural to feelupset, frustrated or
disappointed when things don'tgo as planned.
You need to allow yourself toprocess those emotions and it's
okay to feel down as long as youdon't let those feelings
control you.
You have to take responsibilityfor what you did, because
denial will not help you learnor grow.
(16:32):
You have to accept the errorsas part of the progress, right?
So it's okay to acknowledgelike I'm always just going to
refer back to me and I hope, asyou're listening to this, you're
thinking about whatever you'regoing through or whatever you're
trying to process and you kindof put this on yourself.
But for me, because I'm the onetalking here, it took me a while
to acknowledge how angry I was,how full of resentment I was
(16:57):
right for the things that hadhappened.
I I felt like I put myself intoa pretzel trying to figure out
how to fix it and unfortunately,as I've said in the past.
There's two sides.
Some people are not in the sameplace you are and I think
sometimes people can't meet youthere, unfortunately.
And that's okay, I've learnedit's okay because they're just
(17:18):
not where they're supposed,where I need them to be, or
where they're not in a placewhere we can move forward,
unfortunately.
But for me and this is where I'mtalking to you is you've got to
face what you're feeling.
You know you can't control theother person.
You can't get them to movethrough things if they don't
want to control the other person.
You can't get them to movethrough things if they don't
want to.
You can't get them to work onthings if you don't want to.
But you can acknowledge yourown feelings and I think that's
(17:44):
important.
So and that is a lot of what Ididn't do in the past I would
stuff it down and be like Ican't even be mad at this person
, because then it's just goingto cause more problems and I'd
push it away and then somethingelse would happen and then I'd
be, you know, more hurt orwhatever, and I would like in my
mind say I'm really angry, butthen I push it down and it's a
nope, just got to keep going andI may address it a little bit,
but I ultimately would give upon it Cause I'm like it's just
going to push them away orwhatever and instead I need to.
(18:05):
It took me a long time torealize like I'm angry, but
what's below the surface of that?
Well, I'm anger is usually hurt, right.
And why am I hurt?
What's the reason I'm hurt?
Am I frustrated?
In my case, I was frustrated.
I was very disappointed.
I had too high of expectations.
That happens, right, because Ihold myself to a high standard.
(18:26):
But not everybody's like me.
Not everybody has the samedesires and goals and values,
and so when you kind of projectthat onto someone else and they
can't hit it, it's going todisappoint me.
I would imagine if they careabout you, it's really going to
disappoint themselves becausethey're trying.
I would see that in my business.
I would see my business partnertrying, unfortunately I don't
(18:49):
know, through all of it.
I think it just got too much atthe end and I don't think that
person was in a place to to moveforward.
And so for me realizing that,like I can't control this stuff
anymore, I have to face it,because it just builds so much
resentment that then it's like awall.
You can't even get over itright, and then you kind of have
to start to analyze it, andthat's kind of what I was just
(19:12):
talking about taking a step backand dissect what went wrong.
You want to look at the factorsthat led to the outcome.
So then it's like, depending onwhatever it is, was it a lack
of research?
Was it poor planning?
Was it just a person that isnot in a good place and you
can't really move past it?
Was it you didn't have enoughmoney, like you didn't open in
the right location?
Maybe I don't know.
(19:34):
Maybe you did a mobile and youshould have done more of a
stationary business right.
Or maybe you did a businesswhere you put it in a location
that was not good and maybe itwould have been better in a
mobile business for, like, acoffee shop or whatever.
So you just got to kind of lookat that and say, okay, what
went wrong?
And for me, with my pastbusiness I've had a lot of time
to do that and I can see a lotof spaces that it went wrong.
(19:55):
Now I can't go back and changethat or fix that.
I wished I could.
It's not how it works, but nowI know, going forward in my
current business and my currentventures, if there's other
things in the future, I knowwhat to avoid and what not to do
this time and remember to bereally objective.
You know, look at like I sawthat I did this, but how could I
(20:16):
look at it differently?
How could I have done thatdifferently?
Because you want to understandthe why so you can prevent it
from happening in the future.
And then you want to kind offind lessons.
Again, that's part of whatwe're talking about identifying
the key takeaways.
What insights can you draw fromthe situation?
How do you apply these lessonsgoing forward?
And then you want to implementthe change right, use the
(20:38):
lessons learned to makeimprovement.
You want to adjust yourstrategies, refine your
processes, apply what you'velearned to future projects.
So I work with some coachingclients and I'm noticing, like a
lot of small businesses andthis is not, this is standard I
think it happens to most smallbusinesses because you get going
and sales are most importantbecause you got to have money
coming in.
Then you start getting thesales and then you start to grow
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and then it just kind ofbecomes mayhem and you're trying
to keep up and then there's nosystem for problems, there's no
system to track orders, there'sno system to track clients, and
I see it a lot where thesebusinesses they're just
struggling because they're likethe money's coming in but it's
all going back out and it'schaos and I'm stressed out.
And so that's where it worksgood to sit down with a coach
like me, because I'm looking topdown, I'm not so emotionally
(21:22):
invested in the business whereyou are, so I can start to see,
like, okay, I can see from theoutside the chaos, I can kind of
look through it, because you'reso knee deep in it.
There's that saying you can'tsee the forest through the trees
.
That's why a coach like me isgreat, because I can come in, I
have to spend a little time inyour business, but I can see,
like, okay, you guys are notcommunicating, clearly, your
(21:42):
systems are a wreck, or maybeyou don't even have any.
Um, I can see that, like, youdon't have a budget, you don't,
you don't know your numbers,whatever.
And so then me and you can sitdown and start going through
these things and saying, okay,it's not just here's homework,
take it back.
Because the problem is whenyou're so deep in that and
you're so stressed out andwhatever, you don't have the
time to say, okay, I'm taking anhour to work on this.
(22:04):
But if you're working with me,I'm going to say we're going to
meet, you're going to respect mytime, you're going to actually
show up, and then we're going towork through it together and
we're going to start knockingthese things off the list and
over time it does take time tofix problems.
You can start to see, okay, wehave a system, this is running
smoother.
Or I have a budget.
I can see like we're not makingany money because we're
(22:25):
spending it all, or we're notcharging enough so we have to
raise prices.
And together we start to workthrough that.
And that's why a coach isreally great.
So if if you don't have one, Irecommend it.
I'm a business coach.
There's tons of businesscoaches out there.
It's really good to see,because then I also I've been
through this stuff.
I run my own business, I runmultiple businesses, I've had
business partners, I havebusinesses I run by myself.
(22:47):
I mean I just I've seen a lotand I feel for people in
business who love their business.
They're trying to do right, youknow, for the customer and for
their families and they're juststruggling because it's a lot.
And I've been through a lot andI've built businesses and I
just know how it works and I cansee it.
Now.
I don't run corporations, I'mnot a coach for a corporate
(23:08):
person, I'm just I don't runbillion dollar business.
I mean I have no idea what thateven looks like, but you know,
I would say a business startingout all the way up to a few
million dollars.
I mean I've got a pretty goodbusiness in the barnyard and I
kind of I've built the systems.
I mean window cleaning.
We built all the systems fromscratch.
Unfortunately, the systems werenot the problem, it was more
just the people trying to getalong, which is the hardest part
(23:31):
.
People, you know we can't makeeach other do what we want to do
and sometimes our values get alittle mixed up and our lives
change and we go in differentdirections.
So that's all part of that.
And then let's see here I wantto see which one I want to go to
next.
I would say the next thingwould be the implementing, which
again I was talking about withthe coach, using the lessons
(23:53):
that you've learned to makeimprovements.
So would be the implementingwhich again I was talking about
with the coach using the lessonsthat you've learned to make
improvements.
So you're adjusting yourstrategies, refining the process
right what we just talked aboutand then start applying it,
start putting it into practice.
Because if we just talk aboutit which I feel like happened in
my business we talked aboutstuff until finally the showing
up just didn't happen anymore,but we talked about it and then
we just as much as I would pushto implement, implement.
(24:19):
It takes the people in yourteam to implement those things,
because I can't be everywhereand so you have to get buy-in
and get the people on board.
And then you want to.
I would say, kind of sit downwith your team and share the
lessons you've learned, sharethem with the team or the
network.
It not only helps others learnfrom your experience, but also
solidifies your ownunderstanding of it.
And even just kind of talkinghere on this, this platform, my
(24:40):
podcast, it reminds me of like,yeah, I mean I've got some stuff
to keep working on and I'vedone, I've made some big
progress and I wished the onlywell.
I won't go too much into this,but the only team member I
wished I could share this withwas my old business partner.
I wish we were at a place wherewe could sit down and just like
talk about it and not talkabout it because there's any
(25:02):
saving anymore, it's too late.
But I think there's so muchgrowth in discussing the past
and not not coming back of likeyou did this and blame, but like
the revelations.
There's healing and growth inthat and I just that's the one
thing I wish was different.
I wish this person would bewilling to talk to me and in a
place of like, not condemnationand blame, but growth and change
(25:23):
.
Because, man, I've learned somuch and, you know, no one else
knows that except for the peoplethat were in it with you, and
so I do hope and pray that Godwill somehow align that someday
and it'll work out and change.
But you know, for now I'm justgoing to keep figuring it out
for me and keep trying my bestto change.
Unfortunately I can't go back tomy company and do that because
it's not my company anymore, butI do it currently in my the
(25:44):
barnyard business I and it'sreally helped me in coaching
because I can see the strugglesand you know, sometimes it's
hard to take criticism,sometimes it's hard to see the
things that you're personallydoing that you know other people
see, but they're too afraid totell you.
And that's one thing about abusiness coach if they're a good
(26:04):
one, they will tell you to yourface, like you're being really
hard on your people or you'retreating them wrong, or you're
being too hard on yourself, ormaybe you're not taking any time
for yourself or whatever.
And they will tell you to yourface some of the things that
they're seeing so that you canstart to make adjustments.
That is the most invaluablething ever, because that is also
talking about that.
In my past experience again inmy business partner, especially
(26:31):
the first few years, I learnedso much from this person because
he was a bit of a.
He wasn't a big talker, butwhen he would talk I would
listen because he didn't say aton right and I saw things that
I he would tell me a lot I was,I was working too much and I
need to relax a little bit andhave some more fun.
And and there was some thingsthere that, like I can really
(26:53):
dig into there was nuggets ofgoodness and some, and there was
times he told me I wasn't in myother businesses, I wasn't
charging enough, or he wouldtell me how valuable I was, and
I don't know.
Those are things I am sothankful for, because not
everybody was telling me thatand I wasn't being good on
myself.
And so having that kind ofmirror if you will, that will
tell you the truth is is reallyI don't know it's really
(27:15):
valuable.
So, anyway, I'll continue.
So once you do that, you want toset some new goals.
It says failure doesn't meanyou should quit Never, quit
Never, please, never give up.
Relentlessness and I guess justdesire keeps me going, because
I'm like, I'm not going to takethat.
I'm not a no person, I don'tlike no, I want to find a way
(27:36):
around it.
There's gotta be a better way.
You don't want to be my friend?
Why?
How can we fix it Right?
Or you don't want to buy myproduct Okay, how can we maybe
change that?
Or, uh, you can't know.
I think that's just a fightthat's in me and I don't like no
(27:57):
.
So if you, if you're a noperson, let's talk, because I'd
like to get around that untilmaybe, or yeah, so there's a
different way, or maybe I justdon't work with a company, but
it's.
I think there's just got to bea fight in you that you want to
say that's so.
Then, talking about goals, breakthem down into smaller,
achievable steps so the journeyfeels more manageable.
(28:18):
Maintain a growth mindset.
Embrace the belief that skillsand abilities can improve with
effort and learning.
Those who view challenges asopportunities for growth are
more resilient in the face offailure.
And then it talks about seekingsupport.
Don't do it alone.
Talk to friends, talk to family, talk to mentors, talk to your
(28:40):
business partner.
Talk to your employees to apoint where you can Now some
stuff you can't talk to themabout because they need to not
know every little detail of yourbusiness.
That could cause some issues.
But if you can find otherbusiness owners, talk to a coach
.
I mean that's if it's businessstuff.
Talk to a coach, right, or amentor.
If it's personal stuff, talk toa therapist.
(29:03):
Talk to someone you can trust,someone that doesn't really have
fight in the game but they careabout you improving, if I would
say that they usually offerfresh perspective, encouragement
and helpful advice.
And then really take care ofyourself.
During tough times, it'simportant to take care of
yourself, your mental andphysical well-being.
Get to the gym, go for walks,mental health, you know growth
(29:24):
books, yoga, there's therapists,there's counselors.
There's so much stuff out therethat if you would just reach
out for help.
I see people that I knowthey're struggling and they just
they think they have to do itby themselves and that's
probably a trust issue, I'm sure, but they're afraid of getting
hurt.
But I wish they would just likejust trust and just let people
(29:47):
be people.
I mean, we're not perfect, butthere is good people out there
and when you find them you hangon to them because they're
you're going to need them.
I mean, life can be hard, it'sa battle sometimes and I think
with good people behind you itlessens the burden.
And then the Lord.
Talk to the Lord.
If you're a believer I hope youare, but I mean the Lord.
I've let some stuff out to himand I trust that there's some
(30:09):
stuff that's not good right nowthat he's going to continue to
work on and will make betterbecause he's a faithful God.
You always want to eat well,right, you want to exercise, you
want to get plenty of sleep andyou want to keep your mind
clear and focused on the biggerpicture, and that's something I
was telling one of my coachingclients the other day was, since
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I've started working on mymental health and my emotional
health in the past and traumaand all this stuff.
It's like the more I get thatout, the less heavy my emotional
baggage is and the more clear Ithink every day, the faster I
get stuff done Like I'm.
I'm so mentally clear right nowbecause I'm just cruising
through things and I'm just I'mnot carrying the weight of all
this stuff.
It's not there anymore and I'mso thankful for that, because
(30:53):
there was a time when I couldn't, I had no capacity left.
I was so emotionally bankruptand I was mentally drained and I
was physically exhausted andthings took so much longer and
things went awry because Icouldn't, I couldn't hold the
bag anymore.
You know, the bag was bustingat the seams and now that that
(31:13):
barrel of mine is kind ofstarting to empty out, it's so
refreshing and life is so muchmore exciting and fun again and
I can enjoy what I'm doing andenjoy the moments.
And then you know, don't letfear and failure stop you.
It can sometimes paralyze you.
Remember that every successfulperson has experienced failure
along the way.
What matters is theirpersistence and the fact that
(31:36):
they bounce back right.
Don't ever let failure and Ibelieve a devil likes to push
that on you, like you failed,this didn't work, this
relationship didn't work,whatever.
And then you go in a hole andyou hide.
And man, don't do that.
Come out swinging, come outproud.
I mean, be proud that you tried, even if you failed.
Your business didn't make it,you didn't have the money and it
didn't work or I don't know.
(31:57):
You've learned those lessons.
You took a swing at the batright, like if you just go up
there and never swing at theball, well, that's pretty sad.
I mean you don't even have achance to fail because you
didn't try.
That's harder for me not tryingthan failing.
I mean, what do I really carewhat these people think as I'm
getting older?
That's really true and that'snot saying that I just go and
hurt people.
That's not what I'm talkingabout.
(32:18):
But I don't know.
I'm actually looking at a signright now that's in my coaching
studio and it says hustle untilyour haters ask if you're hiring
right, because you have peoplearen't going to be, they're not
going to like you, no matterwhat you do, they're going to
always, you know, be against you.
And I kind of like that.
It's kind of cheeky, becauseI'm like I'm going to hustle and
(32:39):
do it in the way that God willhonor it.
So much of these people can'tdeny that I did something great.
Right Like I don't care if theydon't like it, but at the same
time, maybe it'll inspire themto quit being such a putz and
get off their butt and dosomething.
And that's my next point is keeptrying.
Most importantly, don't give up.
Every time you pick yourself up, you grow stronger.
(33:01):
The road to success is rarely astraight path, and persistence
is the key.
And remember that sometimesthings fail, it's okay.
The key is learning from yourmistakes and using them to
improve.
So I want to tell you a storythat's kind of interesting.
It says Starbucks made amisstep when it initially tried
to scale too quickly in the2000s, the company faced
(33:23):
criticism for its overexpansionand decline in coffee quality.
However, they took thesecriticisms seriously, redefined
their business model and focusedon their core values, and this
led to revamping the brand.
And then, all of a sudden, thisresurgence in popularity rose
up, and now look where they are.
So I mean, I think for me, mymisstep was I guess it would be
(33:52):
not having clear boundaries, notstaying in my lane, and I don't
know it's.
It's a hard one for me because Idon't think I'd take any of it
back.
You know it's hard that my egois like I would never do it
again.
That's not true.
I had so many good experiences.
I wish it was in a verydifferent place.
I wish that business would begrowing so good right now.
(34:13):
But you know you can't live inthe past, you can't live with
regret.
And so just remember, cultivatethat growth mindset, get that
feedback, reflect and thencelebrate the wins.
Man recognize and celebrate theimprovements you made as a
result of learning from yourlessons.
They'll keep you motivated andfocus on continual growth.
And I think doing things likethis telling people, get out
(34:34):
there and be a platform of themistakes you've made and I'm
putting it out there I freaking,messed up man.
I didn't do everything great,but I've learned a lot and I
think my heart for people isstill there.
My heart to help people isstill there.
And these mistakes, they're notthe end of the road, they're
just the valuable detour on thepath to success.
So this quote from Trevor Noahsays mistakes are the dots that
(34:58):
connect our experiences andshape the narrative of our lives
.
Your lessons are your pivotalmoments that lead to growth,
resilience and creativity.
And so the last thing I'm goingto say before I end this is I
was there's, I don't know.
It's like a video on YouTube youcan watch, but it's Tombstone
and it's got great music behindit, but it's talking about the
(35:18):
dash and it's saying that lifeis the dash right.
So on your tombstone it's likeI was born in 1983, I died 2045,
whatever it is, and there'sthat dash in between and it's
like what is, what is the dash?
Well, that is, that's your life, that's your experiences,
that's the happiness, themoments of regret.
That's that's all these things,right, and the dash is what
matters in life, because youdon't I apologize, I'm actually
(35:43):
getting emotional talking aboutthis but the dash is like that's
all you get, man.
I mean, some people get 20 orsome get 50, some get 100.
But what you do in the middle iswhat matters, right.
The people that you love andaffect, and the children you
raise, and the spouse that yougrow old with, and the
businesses you raise up, and thepeople that work for your
(36:04):
business.
That's what matters, the stuffin the middle.
So don't sweat the small stuff.
You made a mistake in themiddle.
Keep going.
There's so much life yet.
Don't give up and don't live inregret, because everything is a
lesson, everything is somethingyou will learn, and so I just I
hope you think about that today.
(36:25):
So, if you enjoyed this episode,don't forget to subscribe, like
, share, you know, do all of it.
Like my page, share my page.
I am on all different platforms.
I'm on Facebook, instagram,iheartradio, apple Podcasts,
youtube.
I will be adding video here inthe next few weeks.
I have a good friend of minewho's going to come in and help
me with that, so we'll have thatsoon.
(36:47):
I challenge you to keep pushingforward and turning those
mistakes into mastery.
Thank you so much for listeningtoday.
We're growing quickly and I'mso thankful for all of you
listening today.
We're growing quickly and I'mso thankful for all of you.
Please share your ownexperiences and insights by
visitingwwwlightupyourbusinesspodcastcom
.
And thank you and you guys havea great day and I will see you
next time.
And remember, in the world ofbusiness, every success story
(37:14):
begins with a passionate dreamand ends with a strategic
billion dollar handshake.
Stay ambitious, stay innovativeand keep making those deals
that reshape tomorrow.
Thank you all for tuning in anduntil next time remember.
Proverbs 3.3 says let love andfaithfulness never leave you.
(37:36):
Bind them around your neck,write them on the tablet of your
heart.
That way you will win favor anda good name in the sight of God
and man.
And remember.
If you like what you heardtoday, click the follow button
so you never miss an episode.
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