AARON ADAMS: Caregiver and Author - A Son's Harrowing Journey Through Our Broken Healthcare System - Love Conquers Alz

Episode Transcript
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(02:47):
deep dive into everything,Alzheimer's, The Good, The Bad
and everything in between. Andnow here are your hosts, Susie
singer, Carter and me, Donpriess singer, song, music.

Susie Singer Carter (03:03):
Hi everybody. I am Susie singer
Carter, and

Don Priess (03:06):
I'm Don priess, and this is Love conquers all's
Hello Susan,

Hi, Don.
How you doing? You got casualthere? I said, Don Yeah,

Don Priess (03:15):
you did. Yeah. I normally it's Donald. Yes, it's
Don I wasn't even sure if youwere talking to me, enlightening

the mood enlightening today, before we do
a deep dive into where we'regoing today. Yeah. So speaking
of that, hi everybody. Thanksfor joining us. Love conquers
all's we really appreciate youcoming back and being loyal
listeners, and we hope thatwe're bringing value to your

(03:44):
life. And I think today will beparticularly valuable in terms
of kind of a different subjectthat we're kind of skewing a
little bit to go along with ourwhere our head's at right now,
which is in our documentary, NoCountry for Old people, right?
And because of that, we have avery special co host guest with

(04:07):
us, a guest co host, which is,which is none other than Rick
montcastle.

Don Priess (04:13):
I was wondering who that extra guy was up? Yeah,

yes. Rick montcastle, hi,

Rick Mountcastle (04:17):
Susie, Hi Don Thank you for having me.

Don Priess (04:19):
Hello, Rick, of course.

So in case you don't know, Rick is not, not
only is he the CO producer,along with Don and I on that
documentary, No Country for Oldpeople. Rick, I'm going to give
you his very prestigiousbackground, is a former retired
US Attorney, an award winningfederal and state prosecutor who

(04:42):
prosecuted one of many caseswhich but you might have heard
of the Purdue pharma case wherehe prosecuted them for
fraudulently marketingOxycontin, and that story in
particular, was was featured ina Miniseries. On Hulu called
dope sick, and Rick wasportrayed by Peter sarscard,

(05:05):
who's really, so he's reallyfinding his his Starlight right
now he's in everything, right?

Don Priess (05:13):
Like, well, like we were just watching presumed
innocent, and there he isplaying another another
prosecutor, yes. Anotherprosecutor, yes, another
prosecutor.

He found his niche. Well, I

think that his career took off once he
portrayed me in the Hulu.

Who could read it any other way? Rick, of
course, read it any other way?
Yeah. He

Don Priess (05:37):
wasn't as nice. He wasn't as nice and presumed
innocent as he was, you know,you know, I didn't like him as
much as when he played.

He was smarmy. Yeah, he was he was
icky. But side note, presumedinnocent. Very, very intriguing.
We liked it. Yeah. Okay, so, youknow, back to, back to our show
the way that Rick and I met, incase you also don't know that
story, and I'll try to be brief,but it's really, it's really

(06:06):
kind of interesting, and it'swhat Rick always says, There are
no coincidences. And I waswatching dope sick, and in the
final episode, the actor who wasplaying his partner came in and
announced their next case, whichwas also a pharmaceutical case,
which was against Abbott Labs,who produced ox I know Depakote,

(06:32):
which, and they off marketedthat drug, which is a Black
Label drug, to nursing homes.
And my mom was a victim ofDepakote, and I didn't know what
it was until her doctor told meI thought that her, I thought
her Alzheimer's was progressing,and that was eight years before
she died, and she became, shewent from this, you know, very
physically healthy person, to azombie. And so I reached out to

(06:55):
Rick on LinkedIn, and said,Would you come on our show? And
he did. And that was during thetime that my mom and I were
going through such horrible, youknow, that whole journey with
the nursing home, and that Rickwas the very first person to

(07:15):
tell me that it wasn't just mymom's issue and my issue and
this particular nursing home. Itwas really a systemic crisis. So
from there Rick, Rick was, wasit's a long story. I won't go
all into it, but Rick wasactually retiring that year,
which was 2022, and when wedecided to do the documentary,

(07:37):
he was all in because he hadalso prosecuted nursing homes
for over two decades and reallydidn't see any any significant
change. And he, as he says, issick of it, right? Rick, right.

I am. I'm sick of the same old, same old thing
going on over and over again foryear after year after year, and
it's time for a change,

right? So, of course, we were, you know,
beyond ecstatic. Because youknow, what Rick brings to to
this documentary is invaluable,and his experience on on the
political side, and all of thethe you know, the the underbelly

(08:22):
of what we see as as consumers.
You know, he had that experiencebeing boots on the ground and
having and dealing with familiesand basically saying, I have my
hands are tied, like, this isthe this kind of care is the
now, the standard and so, youknow, we're coming from it with
all different kinds ofperspectives. And what we're

(08:44):
finding as we're doing thisdocumentary is that the stories
are there. They're endless, andthey're really important. So
obviously we can't put them allin the documentary area. We'd be
we'd have, like, years and yearsworth of material. But there I
want, I want, you know, we justYeah, and we decided that you

(09:04):
know, that we need. It would bereally powerful to share with
you guys, other people'sstories, so that you can
understand the breadth of thisissue and that people, it isn't
just an elderly person's issue.
Or it isn't just, you know, adiversity issue, or some you

(09:25):
know, people you know in inrural, rural areas, these, you
know, these nursing home issuesare not outliers. These are the
standard. And the good, the goodnursing homes and long term care
facilities are, are the thoseare the outliers

and so Susie, it's not just a nursing home
issue. It's acute carehospitals, which is we're going
to look at today, rehabfacilities. It's basically
anything that is in a position,any kind of facility that is
respond. Responsible for takingcare of people, not just elders,

(10:03):
but disabled folks and peoplethat are recovering from
surgery. They're responsible fortaking care of them in these
facilities. And what we'reseeing is that they are they're
basically abusing and neglectingthe patients. And so the breadth
of this is, actually, is beyondwhat we had imagined when we

(10:27):
first started the project. Iwould say,

I think so.
And, and, you know, we didn'ttouch, we tried, you know,
because of that, the massivebreadth of this, of this issue,
we we stayed primarily onnursing homes in the
documentary, but and that's whywe want to bring more stories
that that you know, actuallytalk about what Rick just said.
So our last episode, we didthat, and we're doing it again,

(10:53):
this episode with with anotherperson. And we just think it's
going to be so valuable for youall to listen to these stories
so that it doesn't happen toyou, so that you can be prepared
and understand what you're upagainst and why this documentary
is so damn important. So withoutfurther. ADO Dawn well

Don Priess (11:14):
today, our guest is Erin Adams. Aaron is a heavy
machine operator for the local649, International Union of
Operating Engineers, and livesin Peoria, Illinois. His father,
Thomas Adams was a robust 75year old who was a beloved
brother, father, uncle, nephew,cousin and friend, but after

(11:34):
treatment for heart issues,Aaron's father was sent to an
acute rehab hospital, and thisis where the story of Thomas
Adams took an unexpected anddark turn. Today we have his
son, Aaron, with us to sharetheir harrowing journey. So
let's say hello to Aaron Adams.
Hello, Aaron.

Hi, Aaron.
Hello. Hello, hello.

Unknown (11:54):
Thank you. Thank you for having me.

Thank you for being here. We really
appreciate it. And appreciateyou sharing your story with us,
because I know how hard it is,and part of sometimes it's
cathartic, but then also it'sreally difficult to relive it.
So thank you. Do you want tojust give us a little recap of

(12:21):
how we got to this conversationtoday, and then we'll dive in
and get into the nitty gritty.

Unknown (12:29):
Okay, well, I guess it kind of started with my father
in his health issues. I didn'treally take it serious, because,
you know, Dad, you just thinkthat he's going to make it
through anything, kind of likeyou think, mom, she'll just make
it through anything. And he hada stent put in, and the stent

(12:54):
was bad. It got infected. Oncethat state got infected, he went
to the hospital and theyreplaced it initially, but they
didn't take the infection out.
So the second step becameinfected, and the hospital who
had replaced it chose not todeal with it because it was had
been like three months when theyhad just had the open heart

(13:15):
surgery previously. So they senthim up to Chicago. I'm in the
Chicago area, so they sent himup to Chicago, and the hospital
handled it. Loyola, they handledthe situation, but they didn't
get all the infection out. Ittraveled down to his leg. He had
come home, and he was homeprobably three days, if I'm not

(13:36):
mistaken, but he just keptexplaining, you know,
expressing, so much pain inhere, and I'm in pain, I'm in
pain, and I'm paying and I'mthinking to myself, Dad, you
can't be in that much pain. Youget up and you drive, you know,
three hours to go getwatermelons. You load up the
back of your truck, you bringthem back here, and then you sit
out and you give them away andyou sell them. You can't be in
that much pain. And heexpressed, he said he was so

(13:56):
Loyola ended up sending him tokindred North Lake hospital for
rehabilitation. They had wentback into the leg, got the
infection out, sewed him backup, and said, Okay, we're going
to get you back walking again,get you back home. So while he
was there, his health just kindof declined. And it seemed

(14:20):
really weird, because he wouldcall me every day and he'd say,
you know, I'm doing this, or II'm doing that, you know, he'd
give me different details aboutwhat was going on with his care.
It was a bit challenging for meto get up there, because
Chicago's approximately threehours away from where I'm at
now, and then I worked an hourand a half south from where I'm
at now, so that was about fourand a half hours to get to him,

(14:43):
you know, get back and forth towork, and I'm his only child, so
that was a challenge as well.
But slowly but surely, he hewould stop calling, and I'm
wondering, like, how come he'snot. Checking in. Usually, he
calls and checks in. And therewas one time that I called and

(15:04):
they said, Aaron, I'm weak. I'mweak. I'm so weak I can't hold
my phone up. And I'm thinking tomyself, That's impossible, Dad,
you're there for rehabilitation.
You know, how can you not holdyour phone up? I couldn't fathom
that idea. I mean, I thought hewas just trying to get out. I
thought he was just trying tohurry up and get home because he
wanted to be home and eat normalfood and play with shadow, you
know, because he loves shadow. Imean, he loves this dog, but he

(15:26):
was actually losing his strengthfor whatever reason, whether it
was because all of the infectionwasn't out or, you know, the
treatment of the facility, theworst part of the situation was
it was something that needed tobe done, and the caretakers,
they weren't doing what theywere supposed to, you know, and

(15:46):
I think this topic is a littlebroader than actually what we we
initially came for, because as Isat and thought about it, you
know, with him not being able tohold up his phone, that should
be an issue. If I come to get myleg, you know, to get rehab on
my leg, and you overhear metelling my son I can't hold my
phone up. You know, as thetaker, as a caretaker, that
should be an issue of concern,at least for me, it would be,

(16:08):
you know, but as time grew on,he stopped calling totally. And
so I placed a call, and, youknow, asked like, Hey, where's
he at? What's going on? And hewould tell me things like, you
know, they're hiding my phone,or they're not letting me call.
Yeah, it was, it was some thingsthere that that were very, very

(16:29):
concerning. And as timeprogressed on, I went, you know,
I went up to speak with thedoctor, and I said, Hey, can I
can I get my dad to come home?
We have a Kindred Hospital in inmy area, you know, can I get him
to come here? And the doctor wasgung ho for it? Yeah, we can do
that. We can do it. And I'mlike, okay, great. We'll make

(16:52):
arrangements. I'll talk to thehospital here. You can talk to
the people you need to talk to.
We'll make arrangements. We'llget him home. The next day, he
went unresponsive and flatlinedright after I had that
conversation with the doctorthat was on a Friday. On a
Saturday, he flatlined. No onenotified me. No one called me
Sunday, which was the next dayafter that he he flatlined. I

(17:13):
had a text from my uncle andsaid, Hey, your dad is
unresponsive. You need to get tothe hospital. And so I'm
thinking, that doesn't makesense. How is he unresponsive?
You know, I get to the hospital,and when I when I get there, I
speak with the doctor, and hesays, Well, he was unresponsive
yesterday for eight minutes, butwe resuscitated him. But we

(17:36):
don't know if there's any braindamage. We don't know. So we'll
do the, you know, the EEG andall the different tests they
wanted to run. So I said, Okay.
I asked, Well, do you know whathappened? Can you explain what
happened? The explanation I wasgiven was like, when an old car
goes bad, you know, everythingstarts breaking down when the
carburetor goes bad, you know,God, I

heard that too. Yeah,

Unknown (18:01):
yeah. So that was same thing, Aaron, that's crazy,

isn't I'm sorry. No, no worse, yeah.

Unknown (18:09):
So, yeah, I was a little perturbed. I Well, more
than a little. I was upset. Imean, I'm not even allowed to
you. I was upset. And I lookedat him and I'm like, Are you
serious? Are you really going togive me the analogy of a car,
and my father's laying here likea vegetable, you know. So that
kind of started the the the firewithin me, you know, and disdain

(18:30):
within me for this, thissituation, what we're talking
about to kind of justprogressively move forward. I
had asked the doctor, I said,you know, once we find out what
his brain activity is, you know,what the level of brain activity
is, I still want to get himhome, you know, because if he's
going to be a vegetable, hemight as well be a vegetable at

(18:52):
my house instead of being avegetable in your hospital, you
know. And so I was told Icouldn't afford to get him home.
No transport service would doit. I mean, everything in the
world why they didn't want torelease my father to me,

who told you that the case manager or the
doctor,

Unknown (19:10):
the doctor, the head physician, told me that yeah and
yeah, yeah, he explained to methat I couldn't afford it, which
was funny, because he doesn'tknow what I do for a living. He
doesn't know, you know, I don'thave kids, I don't have I own
several properties. I own all myvehicles. You know, I make a
great living. When I say greatliving, I'm I'm good, you know

(19:32):
what I mean? So you're good. Hedoesn't know that I'm good, you
know, okay, but good.

He was there.
Can

I ask you a question? Yeah, they're
stereotyping you but can I askyou, was your dad? He was 75
which, in today's world is notan old, you know, old person,
and so was he on? Clearly, hewas on Medicare, but was he on
Medicaid at that point, too forthe long term care? Or, I

Unknown (19:58):
think so, because what I. Talked to his caseworker,
person, she said that he had hadboth. They had transferred him
to both Medicare and Medicaid,if I'm not mistaken. And I
think, and I hate to say he wasstereotyping me. I don't want to
just say that, but I thinkbecause my father being so far
away, me having limited accessto him, and him being on

(20:22):
Medicaid and Medicare, he hemade a safe assumption. Let's
say he made a safe assumptionthat we weren't able to, you
know, you know, fund getting himhome. And so I took it as that,
you know, at first I took itlike, oh, you know, I kind of
gave him the look like, Dude,you know. But then I said, You
know what? Maybe because of thiscircumstance, he's making this

(20:45):
assumption, and not because ofanything else.

Don Priess (20:50):
Yeah, Rick, I had a question, would a doctor
normally be making those thatassumption or those decisions,
or wouldn't that be a caseworker or someone from the
administration

he was, he was probably the medical director.
And you know, oftentimes thedoctors don't like to do that.
They probably should. Theyshould be talking to to families
more. But a lot of times theydon't. They like to send a
social worker or a caseworker,manager, case manager out. But I

(21:23):
think it's, you know, you'd wantto talk to the doctor that was
treating you our loved ones,right? That's the person you
want to have that face to faceconversation with.

Don Priess (21:32):
So I don't know, right? But as far as it's, as
far as, like, determiningtransportation, Yeah, isn't
that? That doesn't seem to behis position that seems

out of his purview. Yeah,

nobody knows.
Nobody knows for sure. Theyshould not be making that
assumption, right? That shouldbe up to the family to decide
what, what's within their meansto do. But I think that was like
a, you know, I think as the asAaron starts talking a little
bit more, will find that theydidn't want, they were they
didn't want something to bediscovered. Okay, they were

(22:06):
hiding something. And thedoctor, being part of that
group, didn't want necessarily.
I mean, he's getting paid bythat rehab facility. Gotcha. You
know, he might have even aposition there of some sort of
authority. And there'ssomething, you know, I think
it'll become clearer, as Aarontalks, that maybe they were

(22:28):
hiding

Unknown (22:28):
some what I think he was attempting. And by no means
am I attempting to take thisside of the doctor, but I think
he was attempting to deter mefrom trying to get my dad home,
as Rick was explaining. So Ithink in him making the
statement about finance thatmight have scared me, I guess he
was thinking, which it didn't,but in his mind, he was thinking

(22:51):
that possibly might deter himfrom continuing to try to push
the issue about getting him backto Peoria. He also stated that,
you know, no transportationcompany would do it. He said,
You know, it's a three hourtrip. Your dad is on the
ventilator. We can't transporthim with the ventilator. You
know, he gave me every reason inthe world, everyone that he

(23:13):
could possibly come up with.
That was the initial answer. So,yeah, I was, I got, I got really
upset, you know, I got upset tothe point where I told him, I
told him, I don't want you tosay anything else to me. You go
that way. I'll go this way.
We're not going to talk anymore.
From here on out, it's going tobe somebody else who
communicates with me because,yeah, we're just not going to do
this. And he, he was upset afterthat, I left, you know, let me

(23:36):
go back a little bit. I honestlywas going to pull the plug that
day. When I saw my dad thatSunday, I was going to pull the
plug, but I had a friend go upwith me, and she's a nurse, and
so I was like, You know what? Iprobably need somebody who knows
about what's going on, because Idon't know anything, and they
could probably tell me anything.

(23:57):
I need someone who knows theterminology, who understands so
I called her. I said, Hey, youwant to go to Chicago with me?
Dad's in the hospital, they say,flatlined yesterday, and now
he's, you know, unresponsive.
And she's like, yes. So wedrove, we got up there, and so
she looked at me, she says,Aaron, don't do that yet. And
I'm like, Oh, I can't watch him.
I can't see him like this. Ijust got to do this. And she's
like, No, don't do that yet. Andso I'm like, Okay, I called my

(24:21):
mom. My mom said, Aaron, give ita week, just wait. So I said,
Okay, I waited that week, andthey still hadn't got the EEG
report. And I'm like, how do younot know what his brain activity
is after a week, you told meit'd be two days. Now it's a
week later. We still don't know.
So I said, Okay. Next thing Iknow he I go up with, I go up
with my Flm, F, L, M, a, becauseit's called the problems at my

(24:46):
job. I he has like eightdoctors, and all of them are
calling me every day. Excuse meto ask, can they do something
else, you know? Can we turn thetrach tube? Can we add more of
this? Whatever the stuff wasthey were using to keep his
heart. Rate up, you know,because it's his blood pressure,
whatever they need to keep thethe veins constricted. So they
would call the kidney doctor,the nutrition doctor. And I'm at
work, and I'm getting thesecalls, and my supervisor like,

(25:09):
hey, what's what's going on, youknow? And I'm like, Man, dad's
in the hospital. He's dying, andhe's like, Well, you know, the
company we're working for, theydon't want you on your phone.
And I mean, three, four or fivetimes a day, I got a different
doctor every time they go in tosee him, that doctor would give
me a call, you know. So it'sjeopardizing my job. So I take
the FL M A paperwork up there,and he tells me he's not cited
it unless I do a DNR or pull theplug. So he gives me the option

(25:34):
to do one of the two. And atthat point,

Whoa, yeah.
That's a family that's FamilyMedical Leave Act, which is,
it's a law that says certainemployers have to allow
employees time off of work totake care of a family emergency,
like a medical emergency, likethat, but, but, but Erin's
talking about needing to havethe doctor gets to sign it to so

(26:00):
the employer to verify it withthe employer.

Don Priess (26:06):
But you have to have a do not resuscitate, or a that
they they're making you do that.

Unknown (26:12):
That's insane. Try to make me. Try to make me. Um, he
tried to make me. And I lookedat him and I told him, dude,
you're going to suck, because hetold me he wouldn't sign it. And
I'm like, Dude, you're going tosign this paper, and I'm not
going to do anything. I'm notdoing anything, but you're going
to sign the paper. I mean, hewas upset with me. I was upset

(26:33):
with him, you know. And I thinkhe kind of felt like, well, you
know, I got this six foot blackguy, 235 pounds, sitting here
telling me I'm gonna sign thepaper, even though I don't
really want to. I think I'mgoing to, you know, and so at
that time, you might have, youknow, kind of stereotyping like,
you know,

I'd rather have your stereotype than mine,
because this is what they didwith me. This is what they went
with me, that like that, thatdumb, that dumb blonde in the
other room. What the hell she'stalking about? A buddy. Nobody
was intimidated by me. Oh,

Unknown (27:08):
goodness, I'm so sorry.
I should have been there foryou.
But he signed the paper. Hefussed his way out. Told me it
was stupid, you know, whatever.
But he did sign it. I didn't,you know, do that. I didn't do
the DNR. But the nurse told methat they thought that I was
going to do the DNR that day.

(27:30):
And I told him, I'm not doing ituntil my dad gets home. I'll do
the Do Not Resuscitate once he'sin my care. So smart, you know,
smart. And so I left thehospital, a course upset he, you
know, the doctor walked off. Andso I began to call companies,
every transportation company Icould think of, and found one.
They said, Yes, we can do itwith the vet tube. We can do it.

(27:50):
We can get him back. We can gethim to the Kindred. We'll pull
the vet tube from the KindredHospital, and then, if he's, you
know, if he survives, you canget him home. Perfect. I just
want him back in Peoria. That'sall I want. A couple days later,
they would call me back and say,Hey, we talked to that doctor.
He said, No, we shouldn't do it,because this, this and this. And
I'm like, Are you serious?
They're like, yes. Like, okay.

(28:14):
Next week comes by, I findanother company to do it. They
say yes. Couple days later, theytell me why they can't, because
the doctors told them somethingelse. So I called up there, I
told him, I said, Hey, listen, Idon't want you to speak to any
more of the transportationcompanies if you're going to
tell them they can when they'vetold me they can. It's some
reason you're trying to stop mefrom getting my dad. I don't
know why. I have no idea whatwhat you're doing, but you're

(28:35):
trying to impede on everyopportunity that I'm having to
get my father home. I just wantmy dad home. Dude, that's what I
want. I don't want him dyinghere. I want him home. And so
he's, you know, of course, hetried to give me the spill of
why, and this medical issue,that medical issue, it was just

(28:56):
a whole lot. There were someother things that I wish I could
say what they were doing, butunbeknownst to me, I don't know
about the medical field, sowhile they were calling me,
asking me for my permission todo certain stuff, they weren't
documenting the calls. Sobecause I wouldn't do the DNR,
they want to contact the EthicsCommission committee to revoke
my Power of Attorney rights sothey would be able to have power

(29:19):
of attorney to do the DNR, andwhatever happened after that. I
mean, it was some weird, weirdstuff going on, and how, you
know, they're able to manipulatethe system that they've set up
against you. And when you don'tknow, you don't know. So, you
know, that was one of thethings, his medications continue
to increase. And I'm like, whyare these medications
increasing? If he's a vegetable,why are we increasing

(29:41):
medication? But if you're sayingit's going to help the
situation, you know not onlythat, but if your medication is
so high, we can't transport youbecause you have too much of
this medication in you, or toomuch of that medication in you,
so you can't be moved. Youunderstand? I didn't know this
at the time, but they. Do. So ifwe can tell we'll say, Hey,

(30:01):
Aaron, can we, you know, givehim. We need to give him more
whatever of this. Oh, yeah, goahead, as long as it's going to
help, you know. And you come tofind out, it wasn't really to
help, it was really to, youknow, make the situation work in
their favor. Long story short,third weekend about another
company, they say yes. A coupledays later, they tell me why

(30:23):
they can't do it. So I, youknow, I kept talking to
everybody, though I'm justmeeting new people, talking to
new people. And finally, I metthis young lady. Go ahead,

I was your mom. Was your mother, part of
the caretaking, caregiving?
Well, because she was, she livedcloser right to where your

Unknown (30:44):
dad's at. So my mother was in Arizona visiting
grandkids, so she was out therewith all the great my mom's a
snowbird, you know, in thewinter time she goes to Arizona,
summertime, she comes back toIllinois, so she's in Arizona.
And I'm kind of keeping herupdated on what's going on,
what's going on, but I don'twant to really stress her with
it, because, you know, she'sabout all I got left. So I don't

(31:06):
want to, you know her, you know,have a heart attack and die on
me. And, you know, I just tryto, yeah, I'm trying to handle
it, you know.

And too much, my friend, you were
handling a lot, because I wasthe only one handling. My mom, I
was the only one, so I know,yeah, yeah.

Unknown (31:24):
So I spoke to a young lady, and she initially said she
would be able to, but then sheexplained to me that she
wouldn't, but she referred me toa company that specialized in
transporting individuals like mydad, who would be on hospice
with the vit tube with all themachines hooked up just like
that. So I'm like, Yes, I'mgetting him home. So I'm calling

(31:46):
the family, hey, I'm getting himhome. He's coming on, whatever.
So I contact the company.
They're like, yeah, we can do ithere. We want to lay eyes on him
first. So I said, Okay, perfect.
So they go up, they lay eyes onthem. They see the condition,
they call me and say, We can dothis, but the hospital wants
this DNR before he leaves. Willyou sign the DNR for them? I
said I will not sign the DNR forthem. I know what happens. You

(32:10):
know, at that point in time,usually at that time, the help
totally declines, and he'llprobably be dead. I will not
sign it for them. I'll sign itonce he gets home. That's the
agreement I'll make with youguys. If not, then you guys just
going to have to keep him at thevegetable and we're going to
figure something else out. But Irefused, so she said, Okay,
same, absolutely, absolutely,yeah. So they went and saw him.

(32:33):
They did some investigating.
They saw some things didn't addup. Didn't add up between what
the doctor was saying, what thefile was saying, Things didn't
add up. So they called me andsaid, Hey, Aaron, you know
things aren't adding up. Iexplained to him everything I
have been through throughout thewhole situation, and they're
just like, you know, we're sorryabout that. We'll get your dad
home. So the day of themsupposed to be bringing him

(32:56):
home, they talk to the doctor.
Doctor gives them something,they call me and say, Aaron,
look, we can't do it. And I'mlike, hold

on.

Unknown (33:06):
I'm like, Hold on, wait. I understand that when my
dad arrives, he'll probably bedead within five minutes. I
understand that I've acceptedthat fact, but I want him to do
it here. That's all I'm askingfrom you guys, is I just want
him here. I don't want himanywhere else. I want him to die
here, right? I can't get my Ican't get his auntie up there.

(33:29):
My grandmother's only celibatesister. I can't get her to
Chicago. I can't get the wholefamily there to see him before
he passes. I'm accepting thatfact. I just want him here. It's

okay. I feel you take your time.

Unknown (33:53):
It's okay. So she said, Okay, if you will agree to doing
the DNR, once he gets there, wewill bring up hope to you here.
I said, Thank you. She sent methe paperwork. I signed the
paperwork. They got on theirway. They started coming. They
put him in the ambulance, gothim home, so we got a chance to

(34:16):
spend time with him. You know,we hung out with him all the
family was here, and heactually, we spent time for
probably about 30 minutes withthe mid tube. They gave us that,
which I was very grateful for,because they really were
supposed to take it out fiveminutes after he arrived. But
they gave us time, um, and whenthey pulled the vent, he lived

(34:37):
about an hour. I mean, not much,but that was, that was enough,
you know, he breathed on hisown. We got to talk to him, you
know, everybody got to see him,and I kissed him, and I said,
Dad, it's your choice, becausehe was breathing really good,
like he was, I thought he wasgoing to come through, you know,
he start pumping really heavy.
You. And I said, it's yourchoice, choice, whatever you

(35:01):
want to do. I'm here. It'swhatever you want to do. So
then, of course, he took hislast breath, and the family
started to exit out. And that'swhen I was notified there were
some things that I needed to seefrom the transportation team. I
had already had plans on I hadalready had plans on taking some

(35:21):
pictures, because, you know,some of the physical conditions
that I had already saw, therewas a scar on his a sore on his
mouth, huge scab on his ear. SoI wanted to see what the rest of
his body looked like, you know,very inquisitive. And when you
tell me no, I'm thinking ofways. How can I get this done?

(35:43):
So and why are you telling meno? What is the reason you're
saying no? Yeah, so the nursesrolled his body, and that's what
I've seen. Some of the mosthorrific sites I've ever seen in
my life, the size of my hand.
Like I said, I'm six foot, about230 pounds, and my hand is not

(36:06):
really huge by this back andpalm of basketball, you know,
and there were bed swords on hisbody, the size of my hand, you
know, both my hands round, youknow that. But you know, and
height or and width, that waslike, how it was the size of a
dinner plate. And I'm like, oh,okay, I understand now. I get

(36:28):
it. I get it. This is why Icouldn't afford to get him home,
you know, that's right. This iswhy, you know, all of the
different things that werebrought to me, and why the
attempts to stop me from fromgetting him home. And so they
began to explain to me what thethe bedsores were, you know. And
I'm grateful for those nurses.
They were so wonderful. I mean,they were just the sweetest
ladies in the world. But theyexplained to me, you know, how

(36:50):
that happens, you know, underwhat conditions those things
happen. And

I'm just going to interject and say for
our audience that, you know, andI'd say it all the time, but it
is the hallmark of neglect.
They're not. They are avoidable.
And our experts said that on ourdocumentary, they are, they are
avoidable, and they are the theyare one of, you know, five
things that are the hallmark ofneglect, and that that is, that

(37:20):
is on their to do list is tomake sure that it doesn't
happen, and if they begin,there's always too avoided to
get to that level that your dadhad. That's me, Susie, saying
that, not you, but

CMS, the Centers for Medicaid, CMS will
tell you, says they are neverevents. They should never happen
in any kind of care situation,right? And

Don Priess (37:42):
if they do, they can be treated. If they're caught
when they're when they see thesepeople, you know, they they deal
with this person. If they see itstarting, it can be treated. It
can be avoided, but it has tobe. It is neglect,

yeah, it's neglect. The same with the UTIs.
I was told my mom, oh, olderpeople just get UTIs full stop.
End of story. That's it. Wecan't do anything about it.
That's baloney. That's notthat's neglect. Absolutely

Unknown (38:12):
they told me the same thing. They said the same thing.

Yeah, and so can I also want to say
because for people listening,what Aaron did is, is is really
important, is that he iscurious, and he was curious, and
he didn't take what everyonetold him as the gospel. And when
you have a gut feeling and youknow your person better than
anyone else, like you know yourdad better than anyone else, I

(38:38):
knew my mom better, and I saidto them, I'm not because I had
my mom on on full resuscitation,because, you know, I didn't want
to have Do Not Resuscitate untilI could look in her eyes and
know she was ready to go, right?
I didn't want anyone else makingthat decision in the middle of
the night when I wasn't there,right, right? And I wasn't and I
wasn't being Pollyanna, and itwasn't like I'm trying to

(39:02):
prolong my mom's life and keepher suffering. No, not at all.
But I needed to know. I neededto see her, because I know my
mom. She gave me the high sign.
I know her absolutely so as youknew your dad and as you loved
him more than anyone in thatroom could so, yeah, so I and

(39:23):
what? So what you did? I justwant the audience to know that
that that is so important whenyou when your intuition or your
instinct is telling youotherwise, and it's very
difficult to go up against thiswhole team of people that are
telling you the opposite. Itdoesn't matter if it's one
person or 20 people, if you havean inkling that you're right or
there's something fishy orsomething wrong, stick with your

(39:46):
instinct. Right, right? Aaron,Absolutely,

Unknown (39:49):
I agree 100% follow your gut.

Don Priess (39:53):
Yeah, and that's hard when you're sitting there
and they're the expert and theyknow, and they've been through
this and and it's very difficultto say. Well, no, no, I'm not
listening to that. You know,that's difficult. It's hard.
Well,

because you get gas lit, and they tell you,
yeah, I'm sure they thought, Oh,he's angry, you know, you're
just upset, and you're dad andyou know, this is, you know, I
heard that all day long. I know,we know it's so hard. We know
you're in stress. We understand.
And BS, a lot of BS, yeah, so,but it's hard because you're
vulnerable. You

Unknown (40:26):
are, you are. But the thing was, excuse me, the thing
was, it didn't make sense. AndI'm a guy who's I'm I'm
realistic, but I'm rational. Ilike the information. Once I get
the information, then I processit to say, Okay, this doesn't
make sense. You're telling methat you know we have to do a

(40:46):
DNR, or we have to pull the ventto and betray but I'm thinking
you just told me he's avegetable. He doesn't feel pain.
He's not responding to pain, sowhy do we have to do anything
right now, if he's notresponding to pain, it doesn't
make sense that we have to do aDNR. Well, you don't want him to
go through more pain if they dothe CPR on him. But he's not

(41:07):
responding to it. He doesn'tfeel the pain. So what are you
talking about, Doc? You know, Imean, I just look like this. I
might have boo boo writtenacross my forehead sometime. But
today is not that day, you know,today,

I wonder if I had that written on my back. I
thought it was my hair color,

Unknown (41:35):
but yeah, so it just didn't make sense. You know,
you're pressuring me to dosomething, but there's no
logical reason to do it, exceptthat exactly you're trying to,
you're trying to work somethingout over here has nothing to do
with the patient himself. So,so, yeah, that was, that was a
big part in it, you know. Andthat's where we're at today, you

(41:58):
know.

Right, right. So, wow. So, first of
all, thanks for ruining mymascara, and I'm so sorry.

Don Priess (42:10):
Mine, too. Mine's a mess.

I mean, I'm just so sorry about that. You
have

I am too.
It is, it is. I'm so sorry. And

the thing about it is that this is not an
outlier. This this What happenedto you, happens on a regular
basis. And in all these in thesefacilities, you have people
trying to cover up. They'retelling basically, they lied to
you about why you couldn't bringyour dad home, and, you know,

(42:44):
it's, we just, it has to bechanged. We can't, we can't have
this. It's, it's ridiculous. Andyeah, and so my heart goes out
to you. It's just awful. And IYeah,

it's no wonder. When you think about
like people are listening nowtoo. Sometimes you people just
give up because it is so hard tofight against that kind of
pressure. There's a big pressurethat they put on you, and they
can make you feel, I don't knowif this happened to you, but
many people I talked to haveexpressed this and and there was
a, you know, I'm gonna say thatI contemplated it, but it never

(43:22):
really affected me. Where theytry to make you feel guilty,
like you're you're hurting themby not making this decision.
You're hurting or causingsuffering. Yeah, you're causing
them to suffer, and you whenyou're going, but wait, no, no,
what you're doing, what they'redoing, is causing her to suffer.
This, this doesn't make sense tome. I'm not a doctor, but I have
Google, and my gut fingers, Igot fingers, and I looked up a

(43:46):
lot of stuff. And by and large,everything that I predicted kept
happening, you know, like theywouldn't take a Foley catheter
out. I'm saying I did research.
It's like, that's like poison tokeep that in a person that
doesn't need it, she's fine. Sheneeds it. It's, you know, her
wound did it up. Next thing youknow, she's hemorrhaging in bed
from a Foley catheter, needsblood transfusion, has to be

(44:06):
rushed to the hospital. It's nonstop, because they won't listen
to the family, and they haveulterior motives, which is at
bottom line, follow the moneyalways, and that. And it's down
to understaffing. I get, youknow, so, as we talk about in
the documentary, but it's hard.
And I get why people, especiallywhen you have tons of other

(44:32):
responsibilities, if you have afamily, you have children, you
have a job, you have all kindsof things, and you don't you've
never been put in thissituation. Now, you're dealing
with a with a, right? You know,I didn't know what a, f, L, M,
a, is that

Unknown (44:47):
it? FL,

yeah, because, I mean, I'm independent
contractors, so I had to getthat permission. But, you know,
I imagine that that most peopledon't know what that is. We.
Don't know what we need to do.
We don't know our rights, right,and so we're scrambling, and
some people don't have thefortitude. That doesn't make
them worse, these don't, right,they just don't, and that's and

(45:12):
that's just the truth, and theyshouldn't have to. It's not like
I shouldn't take my car in.
Let's, let's go back to the caranalogy and take it in and and I
don't know one thing. Yeah, Idon't know anything about
carburetors. I shouldn't haveto. If I'm taking it to the
professional and paying my money

Unknown (45:31):
Exactly, exactly, I

agree. Why do I have to go home and Google
it and find

out that's so interesting that that they use
the car thing with you too.
Susie, I hadn't, hadn't knownthat. Yeah, that that, that must
be, that must be the standard,one of the standard lines they
used to gaslight people, right,

right?
Because I was, they were,because the doctor, when he
first admit, like, dischargedher, which she had gone in with,
because of this wound that Ididn't know about. They didn't
tell me. That didn't happenthere Aaron, which,

Don Priess (46:05):
by the way, they buy they need to tell you. They have
to tell you. And of course, theygot

to the hospital. Yeah, when she got to
the hospital, they said theydidn't want the responsibility
on them, so they said, yourmother's here, but she was also
admitted with a stage fourwound, so we wanted you to know
that. So when I called thefacility, they said, Oh, it
didn't happen here. Soapparently it happened on the
way to the hospital, right?
Yeah, yeah, yeah. So yeah. Andso when she was finally and she

(46:36):
also was trached for no reasonshe was she didn't need it. It's
just easier. It's easier. Theygave her a G tube to feed her
through the belly. She didn'tneed that. It's easier, right?
It's then all you have to do isturn the machines. They don't
have to deal with them, becauseit's time consuming, and when
you're understaffed, that's howyou do it well. Plus

they get the charge for those procedures, and
they get the charge, it startsmore money,

right? So when she when she was released,
and I said, is my I wanted toknow, Is my mom dying? And the
doctor was literally said to me,stop being so dramatic. No, your
mom, no, in a good way. He wassaying it in a good way. He was
saying, like, Bill, your mom isa health She's a strong woman.
She will get her back to herbase where she was, but by the
time I got back to the facility,that's when I started getting

(47:26):
that analogy. It's like, well,you know, everything's breaking
down, and this is what happens.
It's like a car. You know, it'slike a car. So when things get
starts, like one thing triggersanother and and that's how it
works. And I'm saying but, butyou're not taking care of her at
all, so you just writing heroff, like, take care of the
wound. Take care of this, youknow. And, and, yeah, they just

(47:49):
wanted me to give up. They justsaid it's gonna die from the
wound. Yeah, yeah, yeah. So, youknow, and most, and I understand
most people would, a lot ofpeople would go, my mom's dying,
and the from the wound, that'swhat they told me. And that's
it, end of story.

Don Priess (48:11):
And that's and some people don't have, some people
don't have family at all, left.
That's drift to the, you know,where there's nobody advocating
for them. You know,

Aaron, can I just tell you I was there? I
gave up everything for sixmonths. I'm not a helicopter
mother by any I'm daughter byany chance, you know, stretch of
the of the imagination. Butwhen, when all this, when the,
you know, poop hit the fan? Iwas like, Okay, that's it. I
have to go every day, because ifI don't, God knows what's going
to happen. And it wasn't, youknow, wasn't a three hour drive,

(48:43):
but it was definitely in LA atleast over an hour each way,
right? Because of traffic, Iended up moving into my ex
brother in law's house, like,two miles away, because I
couldn't take the I couldn't goback and forth every day so, but
I mean, even me being thereevery day didn't help. No, FYI,
isn't that horrible?

Unknown (49:02):
It is. It is because it's kind of like what Don said
you you trust the doctors. Youtrust these people because they
went to school for all theseyears. You know, they know the
medical terminology, and youjust, you expect the system to
work the way they tell you it'sgoing to work. You know, when I
go to the hospital because Ihave a cough. I actually went to

(49:23):
prompt care a couple of days agobecause my tops were swollen.
And so the young lady said,well, we'll test you for strep.
So she did that. And she said,Well, right now, we don't know,
but I'm still going to treat youas if you had strep. And so I'm
thinking, Okay, how long willthis go to make my toxins feel
better? My throat won't beswollen, you know? And so she
gave me some some sort ofsteroid, and she gave me some

(49:44):
sort of bacteria, likeamoxicillin. So I'm thinking,
Okay, I think it's going towork. I'm trusting her, and what
she's prescribing me to do whatshe said it's going to do. We
put our family members in thesecare facilities, and we expect
these. Facilities to do whatthey're supposed to do, you
know. And then they come outdead, you know. And I hate to be

(50:06):
so blatantly blood about it, butthat's what happens, you know.
And people think, Oh, well,well, he said it was because
1949 Pintos carburetor, youknow, goes bad after 60,000
miles, it's supposed to be thatway, you know. And I don't know
nothing about a 49 Pinto. Idon't know if you guys do, but

(50:27):
I'm 45 so I didn't tell youabout a 4549 Pinto, you know.
But if he tells me aboutsomething that I have no
knowledge of, and he just throwsit over my you know, throws the
cover over my head, or theblanket over my head, then I'm
thinking, Okay, well maybe thatis what happened. You know, his
liver went bad, then his kidneywent bad, then his

doctor was too old.

Don Priess (50:51):
But you want to hear and you want to hear answers.
You want to hear eithersolutions or reasons you want to
hear. You don't want to hearthey don't know. You don't want
to hear there's you want to hearanything, even if it's something
that's not positive, but you'rehearing something you want to
see a path, and that's where westart just accepting because you
want to hear

but also, they also tell you things you
also don't want to just hearsomething either. Because, if
you remember, at the theemergency hospital, they told me
my mom was on life support,which she wasn't. She lived
another five months after that,but they wanted her to. They
were basically right, yeah, andand he Yeah, and when I found

(51:32):
out that they were upping herfentanyl like every half hour,
and I don't know why, and thenshe shouldn't have been on it in
the first place, right? And sohe anyway, long story short, he
said, Yeah, I can stop it. Butyou know, your mom, her, her
organs have probably started toshut down by now. And once they
shut down, there's no turningback. And I said, Okay, well,

(51:55):
there must be tests for that tosee if they have begun to shut
down. And he said, yeah, thereare. So, you know, couple hours
later, he meets him at thehospital, yeah, let's just guess
on someone's life. So he showshe shows up, and he goes, you're
not going to believe it. They'reall at 100% I have, boom, never

(52:17):
saw that. I've never seen this.
It's a miracle. It's a miracle.
Your mom, your mom's amazing.
It's a miracle. And I'm like,okay, but he told me her, her
vitals, her organs were shuttingdown period. So if I wasn't such
a stubborn bee, I would have,you know, I would have accepted
it and said, Oh, okay, and lether go. Did

they ever do that, that brain scan, that,
that they said they were goingto do to see what kind of
function they ever actually dothat? Because I know they said
they did okay. They did

Unknown (52:53):
end up doing it. They did do it. I got the report, I
think, don't quote me on this,but I think it was like a week
later, and they said it was lowlevel brain activity. So of
course, he was unresponsive topain, he was unresponsive to
touch, he was unresponsive toeverything, but he was breathing

(53:15):
like 25% over the vent tube. Sohe was breathing some on his
own, but everything else justwasn't functional. And I kind
of, I kind of knew, you know,when I saw him that first time,
I leaned over and I talked tohim, and I could, I could I knew
he knew I was there. There wasno question about it. I got a
bond with my dad like no other.
And I know him. He knows me. Andwhen I leaned over and I

(53:35):
whispered in his ear, I saw him,you know, you could see him. Try
to blink a little bit try to dosomething to let me know he knew
I was there. So I knew that Iknew that he that that at least
that part of him was stillthere. Um, but there was nothing
else, you know, Rick, there wasnothing else. And once they came
back with the test saying it waslow level brain activity and you

(53:58):
know, he was still unresponsiveto pain. It was just about, we
were just at a place where, nowit's like, okay, well, let me
get him home. You know, right,that's, that's, if he's going to
be on hospice, I'll do better byhaving him at home than having
to drive an hour and a half orthree hours there, three hours
back. You know, every day, hourand a half to work, hour and a

(54:20):
half back up that way, to getthat way. And so, you know,
that's where we ended up beingwith, with, with my dad in that
situation.

Okay, could he have been like, could they
have had him on the, you know,heavy duty opiates that he
wasn't responsive because ofthat?

Unknown (54:40):
Well, I I snapped out about that, because early on,
you know, he was expressing alot of pain, so they were
feeding them these, thesemedications and and when I found
out, I'm like, What? What? Youknow, what are you doing? And
they're like, oh, we have him onthis. And that, and this and

(55:00):
that, and I'm like, Well, Icould've swore I spoke to
someone and told them, do notgive him any hard medications.
If, the, if the, if the, youknow, Tylenol three is the most
I wanted him to have. You know,I didn't want the fentanyl. I
didn't want the morphine. Ididn't want any of those,
because not only are theyaddictive? But in his condition,

(55:23):
you know exactly, and that wasjust kind of common sense to me.
I'm not if I know you can't getup, walk around and hang out,
your body's not going to processthem, those drugs properly, you
know, they're just going to sitand it's going to, like you
said, suppress you more. Andanother friend of mine, who she

(55:44):
was a CNA, and she told me, shesaid, you know when you have
combative patients, or, you knowpatients like that, they give
them specific drugs that slowlykill them, but they give it in
increments where you don't evenknow that it's doing that. And
you know when they decide to saywhat they did, how they did,
they're justified because of thesmall doses over a period of

(56:06):
time, you know. And so that wasanother issue, but I told the
doctor. I said, No morefentanyl, no more morphine, none
whatsoever. And if you do decideyou have to give him, call me
and let's discuss why you needto do this, and then I'll make
the decision as to yes or no.
But they didn't. They just keptdoing it. And then when I called
and found out that they had theysaid, Oh, but we're doing it in

(56:28):
smaller doses. I said, but yeah,you were supposed to call me,
you know? But that that's whatthey do.

Don Priess (56:37):
Yeah, as one of our experts in the documentary says,
he goes, it's slow motion. Slowmotion. Euthanasia is what it
is. No it's you're just and youdon't know what's happening.

Yeah. And for our, for and for an expert
to say that that means that thisis, this is not unusual. This is
unusual thing. And, and I'lltell you the reason, what made
me think of it is that when mymom was at that hospital with
that doctor that said her organswere shutting down, when I found
out she was on fentanyl,finally, like when they told me

(57:11):
she was on life support, andthey took out the trach, and she
looked like she was dying,because, I mean, she looked like
what I ever imagined, Like mouthopen, not responsive, like
nothing, and then three dayslater, because you're supposed
to die within a couple hours,three days later, she came out
of whatever this was, and I toldhim that, and he was still on

(57:34):
the fentanyl. She's still on it.
But my mom was a force. Liketelling you, my mom was a force.
If she didn't want to go. Shewas not going. And I was like,
Mom, because my nephew wasthere. He goes. Nanny is not
nanny is wide awake and smilingright now, wake up, Susie, I
went over and Mama, you're atroublemaker. What is going on
with you? What's going on here?

(57:55):
She starts laughing. By themorning, she's watching TV, and
I'm calling the doctor. I'mgoing, I want my mom out of this
hospital. And I went to go takea shower. By the time I got
back, I won't go through all thedetails, my mom was again,
looking like a zombie with hermouth open, not responsive, and
that's when the nurse told methe doctor had come and told her

(58:16):
to up the fentanyl every halfhour

Don Priess (58:20):
after telling her he was taking her off of it.

So these are things that we don't know,
because we don't know that'sright, and unless you know your
person so well, and then and youhappen to be lucky enough to be
there with them, like we said,we stood vigil, like I was there
like I was right next to my mom,because they said she was dying.

(58:44):
I'm not going to leave heralone, right? So, yeah, so I I'm
so sorry.

Unknown (58:52):
I'm sorry for your experience. It's one that no one
should have to go through,nobody,

and especially our parents.

Don Priess (59:01):
If, if, if you could tell, if you could just say,
Here's, there's no magicsolution to what you went
through or what people are goingthrough every day. But if
there's any advice you couldgive to anybody, something that
you would have done differently,something that you think you can
actually do, is there anythingthat you could tell people that
to avoid anything, and you maynot, because it's such a

(59:25):
difficult situation, but is thatjust anything come to mind?

Unknown (59:29):
There is, you know, I have spoke with Rick and, you
know, we've had couple detail,in depth, detailed
conversations, and initially Ifelt like it was my fault, you
know, and Rick kind of helped methrough that, that thought
process of understanding that itwasn't because my dad, he had
asked me multiple times. Hesaid, get me out of here. He

(59:49):
asked me, you know, he wouldliterally, you know, tell me why
he was still cognitive and hewas able to talk. He would say,
Aaron, get me out of here. Getme out of here. And I'm
thinking. You know, Dad, youjust don't want to do what the
people say. Just do your rehabcome home, you know. And he
begged me, I mean, he begged meto get him out of there. And I

(01:00:12):
brushed it off dog, you know. Ibrushed it off thinking that the
hospital was going to take careof my dad, you know. So if I
could give out any tidbit ofadvice, it would be, when you
have a loved one who is able tocommunicate with you and tell
you what they're experiencing,don't take it lightly. First

(01:00:34):
off, find out all of theinformation you can find out
about what this situation is.
You know, Google, like Susiesaid, I use a thing called Chat
GPT. I ask chat GPT a millionquestions a day, but find out
all of the information. And I'mnot saying pull your people out
of hospitals. I'm not sayingthat because it's not all bad.

(01:00:56):
You know, even though it seemslike this may be standard
operating procedure. Now,they're not all bad, you know,
but be informed. Get all of theinformation and make yourself
aware. You know, don't be afraidto, you know, hug your family
member and kind of look to seewhat you see, you know, just to,
you know, do a visual to get anunderstanding of where you're at

(01:01:19):
in the situation. Too manytimes, we kind of just let them
sit there. We sit over in theother chair, and we talk to em
from a distance and not get overand, you know, become part of
the situation, you know, or partof the solution, if I can say
that better. Um, so becomeactive. Become very active in
the whether it's a transition tocome home or transition, you

(01:01:42):
know, to move on to whatever'snext, become active in your
family members lives, andcommunicate, you know, share
your stories so others will gothrough it. Who, who are going
through will know what's what'sgoing on. Because, you know, at
some point, like I said, I don'thave any kids, so I may end up
in one of these places, youknow, just like my father, I

(01:02:02):
might be in that situation, youknow, and if I don't have anyone
to tell my story or to doanything to help me, so I don't
experience what he did and whatSusie's mom did, and what so
many others are experiencing onan everyday basis. So it's up to
us to just be active,Amen, yes, indeed, yes. That's,

(01:02:23):
that is.

Don Priess (01:02:27):
I mean, that's, that's all we can do.

Susie Singer Carter (01:02:30):
And now for now, yeah, for now,

until we can get the system to the to the way it
should be working, which, youknow that that's a big, it's a
big task. But, you know, peoplelike you sharing your stories,
that's, that's the first step toto that solution. So,

yeah, I mean, I want to thank, first of
all, thank you, Erin, forsharing your story. I know, just
hearing it, I feel like, youknow, we, become like a family,
you know, like, I know yourheart, I know who you are. I
feel you like you've made me cryalready so many times today

(01:03:08):
because I'm there with you, likeI've walked, I've walked in your
shoes, yeah, and I get it, and Iknow that so many people
listening to your story willfeel the same way. And so, you
know, we are, we do have power,and that's why we're doing this
documentary, and that's whywe're talking to people like
you, because if, if we areinformed, when we know better,

(01:03:31):
we do better, right? And, andthat's, that's the whole point
of the conversation, and thedocumentary is to inform so that
we can do better. So we that weare armed with knowledge, and so
everybody, please support NoCountry for Old people. It's so
important, as you can seethrough Aaron's story. And you

(01:03:53):
know, it doesn't matter ifyou're man, woman, blonde,
brown, whatever you are. Youknow, a whatever, it's going to
affect you. We it affects all ofus. Aaron, how old are you?
You're in your 40s, 4045 45 Imean, you know you're a young
man in the middle of your life,and you had to deal with it. Not
fair. Your dad was not an old,elderly man like you know, he

(01:04:17):
didn't. He was that wasn'tsupposed to happen to him and
shouldn't have happened to him.
So we all need to band togetheras as a community, nationwide, a
nation, a national community.
And if you want to join usthere, we're doing a people over
profit movement. Go to NoCountry for Old people.com. You

(01:04:41):
can sign up there, whatever yourstrengths are, if you want to
organize, if you want to, youknow if you can walk, make
signs, whatever it is you'vedone this before. Help us out.
We haven't we want, we need yourhelp, and we're still raising
money for the final parts ofthis documentary, and also for
the movement. You can go to thenational consumer voice for long

(01:05:03):
term quality, for quality longterm care, and we have, there's
a link there. You can make a taxfree donation and help us out
that way. But in the meantime,take care of yourselves and your
loved ones, because love ispowerful, right? Don Yes,

it is. Love is powerful. Love is contagious,
and love conquers all's we do.
Thank everybody for watching,listening. If you like what you
hear and see, then pleasesubscribe and share and and we
will, we will see you. Thankyou, Rick my castle, thank you
Rick mount casos, our specialguest. And again, thank you,
Aaron Adams, and he's

just special in sharing your heart,
yes, yeah. Love you, Aaron. I'msending you love and a big hug
and thank you. Yeah, okay, takecare everyone. Bye, bye. Take
care bye, bye. You.

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AARON ADAMS: Caregiver and Author - A Son's Harrowing Journey Through Our Broken Healthcare System

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.css-14f5ked{margin:0;word-break:break-word;display:-webkit-box;-webkit-box-orient:vertical;box-orient:vertical;-webkit-line-clamp:2;overflow:hidden;}AARON ADAMS: Caregiver and Author - A Son's Harrowing Journey Through Our Broken Healthcare System