When I found myself at a crossroads during a transformative women's retreat, little did I know that the path to empowerment would be illuminated by Raquel, a luminary in the realm of holistic health and breathwork. Our latest podcast captures this intimate narrative, where vulnerability meets strength, and the wisdom of our inner child dances with the intuition that guides us through womanhood. As Raquel shares her own ascent from health struggles to inspiring women to embrace their purpose, we celebrate the nurturing power of community and the sheer courage that comes from stepping into motherhood with eyes wide open.
We often overlook the joyous simplicity of play or the profound self-awareness sparked by a cherished childhood photograph. This episode, however, embraces these as gateways to healing. Delving into practices from inner child meditation to vision board creation, Raquel and I reveal how reconnecting with the playful spirit and tender compassion for our younger selves can unlock gratitude and growth. Our discussion traverses the landscape of ritual and how women can reclaim their intuition, setting boundaries that echo self-love and articulate a life lived true to one's essence.
Picture your day beginning not just with the chime of an alarm but with rituals that nourish your soul and harness the power of intention. In the tranquil camaraderie of our conversation, Raquel and I share the diverse tapestries of our daily routines—how journaling can be a sanctuary for joy, breathwork a conduit for balance, and morning rituals a foundation for both structure and spontaneity. We invite you to join us in exploring the holistic practices that can infuse your life with serenity and inspiration, from the first sip of an Ayurvedic morning tea to the guiding light of an Oracle card.
Your hosts: @lynnhazan_ and @tonydoesknow
follow us on social @ltkpod!
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Transcript
Episode Transcript
Available transcripts are automatically generated. Complete accuracy is not guaranteed.
Speaker 1 (00:01):
Hey, welcome to the Lynn and Tony Know podcast.
I'm your host, lynn.
Speaker 2 (00:04):
And I'm Tony.
We are both wellness coachesand married with kids.
Speaker 1 (00:07):
Join us as we talk about all things health,
wellness, relationships, lifehacks, parenting and everything
in between unfiltered.
Thanks for listening and let'sget into it.
Welcome to the show, welcomeback.
I am very excited, for I know Ikeep saying that but like we've
been having like reallyexciting guests and I'm just an
excited person you know Listen.
(00:28):
I mean, our listeners are gonnabe like.
This bitch is always excited.
Speaker 2 (00:32):
It would be weird if you opened up and be like we
have a guest on it's kind ofwhatever, but here we go.
No, but I'm legitimatelyexcited.
Speaker 1 (00:38):
I know, I know and also, like what I love about all
our guests is that I have apersonal connection with each
and every one of them and it'skind of like really wonderful
how just people you meet, justkind of the divine intervention
of bringing those people backinto your life to kind of talk
about things that reallyinterest me and you know our
(01:00):
spirituality and yeah, it's abeautiful thing.
Speaker 2 (01:03):
No, that's awesome and all of our guests are
legitimately exciting.
Speaker 1 (01:08):
So today we have Raquel, and I met her when I was
okay, so I was seven monthspregnant.
It was last October.
I was very, very pregnant and Iwas kind of in the state of
pregnancy where I was like atthe end and I was feeling like
over it, but I was also likereally afraid of of, you know,
(01:29):
becoming a mom again after, youknow, 10 years of you know.
Mia was 10 years old and it'slike, oh my God, I'm doing this
again and I was dealing with alot of like, a lot of things
were coming up for me.
And Soul Spirit is a local yogastudio here in Jersey City and
I was doing prenatal yoga andthe owner, Liz, is like just a
(01:49):
beautiful human being and herand Raquel did a retreat, a
woman's retreat.
Speaker 2 (01:56):
That's how I'm at Now .
The pieces are coming together,yeah.
Speaker 1 (01:58):
So I'm like pregnant, like massive, and I signed up
for this retreat.
It was like in Long Island andit required me to drive like
three, four hours and I was likewhat the hell am I doing?
This is crazy.
But like everything in my soulwas like you need this, you need
this time on your own, you needthis time to connect with other
women, you need to work some ofyour stuff out before you have
(02:22):
this baby, and it was just kindof like a divine thing that
pushed me there, pushed me to go, cause you remember, like the
day before I was like I don'tknow if I want to go, like I
don't feel comfortable driving100%.
And Tony actually went on amen's retreat that weekend and
it was like the first time in awhile that we were like
separated from each other andespecially, you know, during
pregnancy it's a very vulnerabletime and you want to be with
(02:43):
your partner.
Well, in my case, I was likevery attached and it was like a
hard thing but it was likenecessary and I went on this
retreat and I was surrounded byjust the most beautiful women
and so encouraging and it wassuch a like a healing space and
I worked through a lot of likemy fears, and Raquel did like
(03:03):
some breath work and we did someyoga and we did some sound bowl
, like healing, and I had likesome moments of like you know,
kind of like breakdowns.
I guess you know like I brokedown crying in a few of the
moments and I was I don't evenremember about what made like
I'm going to ask Raquel actuallyto maybe remind me if she
(03:25):
remembers but yeah, it was abeautiful, beautiful moment and
I left.
I left the retreat feeling justrenewed and just ready for like
the journey and I was just like, yeah, it's really beautiful to
be surrounded by other womenand it's just something that I
was like I need to do more ofthis.
And fast forward to a couple ofmonths ago.
(03:45):
I started feeling this likestagnant energy and I reached
out to Raquel to do some breathwork with her and it also was
like an hour and we did breath,we talked about like what I'm
feeling and we did the breathwork and I felt like this huge
release and some clarity aroundcertain things that I needed in
(04:05):
life.
And so, yeah, she's on the showand she's just like, if you
follow her, she just like a rayof light, just so positive and
like especially in this fuckedup world that we live in with
all this negativity.
I love following just likewomen that are just like just
empowering and happy and youknow, living their truth and
encouraging, and it's just likea wonderful thing.
(04:27):
So I'm excited to kind of likeget into it with her.
So I'm going to read her bio.
So Raquel is a women's body, manand breath work coach on a
mission to help women get out oftheir heads and into their
bodies inherent wisdom toconnect deeper to the core of
who they are.
After years of struggling withvarious health related issues,
from Lyme's disease to chronicstress, anxiety and fatigue, as
(04:49):
well as a complete disconnectionfrom her body and emotional
world, she went on a journey toheal and look within.
Through her book, or herjourney, raquel immersed herself
into the world of holistichealth and healing practices as
a trained holistic health coachDavid Elliott, breath work and
facilitator, advanced Pranayamaguide, 200 hour Hatha and Yen
yoga teacher, organizationalmindfulness and meditation
(05:10):
instructor and reiki master,raquel loves to empower women
with somatic body based tools tocalm their nervous system,
connect deeper within and comehome to their true nature so
that they too can lead a life ofpurpose and connected to their
unique feminine essence.
Speaker 3 (05:24):
Welcome to the show.
Thank you so much, oh my gosh.
And thank you for diving alittle bit deeper as to how we
know each other and just quicklywant to touch on the one thing
that you said of really how whatbrought you on the journey of
coming to the retreat was thatyour soul just kept saying I
need to do this.
I don't know what it is.
(05:44):
I'm so pregnant.
It's probably not ideal for meto drive all the way out to Long
Island, but listening to thathas really also been a little
guiding force on my journey, soI just want to say thank you for
sharing that.
Thank you.
Speaker 1 (05:59):
And you know, actually the whole, even the
whole thing of me driving on myown, like it was like my first
time in months where I was alonewith myself and my thoughts,
like driving in the car, and itwas like you know it's, it's a
beautiful out, it's like fall,and it was just kind of like I
get to be into, I get to be withmyself right now, and I think a
lot of times with women,especially moms, we're so busy
(06:20):
taking care of other people thateven just that moment of being
with your thoughts and beingalone is like few and far in
between and that was like reallynice and I was like, oh yeah, I
am an individual, like I'm Lynn, you know, and that was a
really nice thing.
So let's talk a little bitabout like the retreat, you know
, and what that was like.
(06:41):
And I'm sure people are curiouslike what, what goes, what
happens in these?
You know, you see people goingon retreats and like people say
I'm going to a retreat, likewhat happened?
And you automatically think ofthat show with Nicole Kinman.
You know that show perfect nineperfect strangers.
You watched it with me.
Speaker 2 (06:58):
Oh yeah, yeah, Did you watch it?
No, I haven't no.
Speaker 1 (07:03):
So like it's kind of like a kooky, you think, like a
people think it's like a kookything, like what?
What goes on at these retreats?
Speaker 3 (07:09):
So it's really, really funny that you ended up
at a retreat, because that'sactually what sparked my healing
journey was going on a retreatmyself.
So so many different things canhappen at a retreat, but
because of my background andwhat I really learned, I like to
include yoga, meditation,breath work.
But for a lot of people it'sjust a chance to get outside of
(07:33):
their day to day.
First off, we're usually all inthe same environment 24, seven,
around the same people.
So just taking a moment to putyourself outside of that already
creates this level ofdiscomfort that creates a deeper
sense of just starting to lookat ourselves from a different
perspective.
And then, on top of that, youhave all of these women coming
together and they're also apoint of reflection.
(07:56):
I don't know how many timesthroughout the retreat you heard
someone mentioning something ontheir own journey and you're
like, oh, I can relate so muchto that.
I didn't really look at that inthat light.
Or I haven't even had a chance,after all of these years of
being in my regular, typicalnine to five or work schedule,
to get to begin to look a littledeeper within.
(08:20):
So I would say the main thingsthat happen at retreat is just
that opportunity.
Maybe it's a week, a weekendlong thing, maybe you go on a 10
day of a postnat retreat andthings get a little wild, but it
is just that moment to look alittle deeper within and then
get to have other people reflectto you the different things
(08:41):
that really are looking to maybebe healed or to discover a
little bit more at that spaceand time.
Speaker 1 (08:50):
So tell us a little bit more about your journey to
becoming who you are today, yourhealing journey, I guess, your
spiritual journey to becomebasically a healer right.
Speaker 3 (09:00):
Well, yes, right, I feel like as healers.
Whenever someone says thatthey're like you're a healer,
it's like oh, do I really wantto claim myself as that?
Especially, you know so manywomen.
I feel like we've had decadesof just suppression.
So for someone to say that toyou it's like oh, my God, am I a
healer?
So thank you for a hot thing.
Yeah, I got it.
Well, the other thing.
Speaker 2 (09:21):
you can call it and this is something that I've
taken on in the men's work thatI do a facilitator, because
everybody does their own healing, essentially like when it's
true healing they do their ownhealing.
The body and the mind, the soul, can heal itself and then there
are people that will facilitateand know how to open the
avenues towards that healing andpoint you in the right
(09:41):
direction.
So it's like facilitating isanother word that I think would
be maybe more comfortable than ahealer.
Speaker 1 (09:50):
I like the.
I think she's a healer.
She has like you know, she hasa talent.
And I think her life, you knowher life story, brought her to
where she is.
So, yes, tell us, tell us more.
Speaker 3 (10:00):
healer Of course, thank you, thank you.
So my journey really gotstarted.
This was pre pandemic, pretalks on mental health, and I
was actually working incorporate fashion and during
this phase of my life I wasfresh out of school, I really
was my whole life.
(10:21):
I would say it was very, verydriven.
I always had that when at allcosts work yourself to the point
of complete burnout, completeexhaustion, really just overall
thinking that my success wasdetermined on what I produce and
what I achieve.
So this, right off the bat, wasreally the lens or the
viewpoint of how I was justviewing my life and it was a bit
(10:45):
of a wake up call.
During that time period,working in just corporate
fashion and seeing, okay, myhealth is actually suffering a
lot, a lot, a lot.
Knowing that, you know, I wasworking in a stressful
environment, of course, on topof that, but I was having
insomnia, sleepless nights, Inoticed myself having panic
attacks I would say a healthy,non healthy little dose of IBS
(11:09):
or gastrointestinal issues, andall of it really stemming from
this deeper layer of completenervous system dysregulation,
not being out of space where Ihonored my body, I honored my
emotions and overall, just notknowing myself at a deeper level
, only ever focusing on theoutward, the outward appearance,
(11:30):
the outward achieving.
So during this little phase ofmy life, my partner who I'm
still with at this time he hadthis brilliant idea to go on a
little bit of a weekend retreat.
So this was a yoga retreat andthis was supposed to be
inversion.
So if you know a little bitabout yoga, this is the
headstands or you know theintense aspects of yoga that
(11:52):
maybe a lot of us don't evenpractice in our day to day.
So, being this very go getterself, I was like, yes, we have a
weekend of like just flippingupside down.
This is going to be awesome.
Not thinking I'm going toactually take time to look at
myself.
So fast forward, go on thisamazing retreat.
What I didn't realize, that theemphasis or the focus of this
(12:13):
retreat was going to be actuallystarting to slow down.
One of the major components wasmeditation, and this was before
I had a meditation practice,before I really had a yoga
practice, and I remember thatweekend, the first time I
meditated.
I don't know what happened tome, but I felt like I was
floating.
(12:33):
I felt like the first time inmy life I actually felt a little
sense of a connection, a deeperconnection to who I am, at more
of a soul level or core, corelevel of self.
So fast forward.
I had this amazing experience,this little bit of an epiphany.
I get back to my nine to fivejob and right when I get there,
(12:54):
everyone in the office looks atme.
They're like what happened toyou, like there's something
different here.
It looks like you're glowing.
I was like, yeah, I feel likethat.
I had this awesome retreat andthen, before I know it, there is
this, you know, really intense,urgent thing that has to get
done, and right away I snap outof it and it's back to work mode
.
So I'm not even kidding you.
(13:15):
That day I remember sitting atmy desk and already applying to
essentially work at thismeditation center, this yoga
ashram, and essentially quit myjob and move there.
If I got the position and fastforward, maybe two weeks after
that I land this job doingdigital marketing for them,
which is essentially what I wasalready doing in corporate
(13:37):
fashion I end up having myapartment lease running out in
like the next three weeks.
So all at once, in a threeweeks time, I quit my job, leave
, you know, hoboken and I end upmoving to this yoga ashram in
the Poconos and really just likeletting, letting the world, the
(13:58):
universe kind of guide me, andduring that time I end up
spending about two years there.
I do my 200 hour yoga teachertraining, I'm studying holistic
health, ayurveda and just abunch of different practices
from you know, breath work,meditation, all those things.
But the biggest thing I want toemphasize here, when I made this
(14:21):
big decision, the first thing Iremember when I get to the yoga
ashram is I have, you know they, they wanted to give me a whole
week off.
And I'm like, guys, I don'tneed a whole week off.
Like I'm from New York, likelet's, let's get this party
started, let's get moving.
They're like, okay, you cancome in in two days, but we're
going to give you a little bitof space.
I get the whole room arranged,everything done in a couple of
(14:45):
hours, and then I'm twiddling mythumbs there and not knowing
what to do and I'm in the middleof nowhere.
It's not like you can just goand you know, pop over to a play
or entertain yourself in someway, distract yourself in some
way, but you actually have tosit there and be with yourself
and when you know, your mind iskind of like a prison, or at
(15:06):
least mine was during that time.
It was like complete and utterdread and I remember when I
finally started to sink in, Islept for like three months
straight.
I was completely burnt out.
My nervous system was at aphase of just trying to
understand itself, trying torewire and get out of fight or
(15:29):
flight mode, essentially.
So that's where my journeystarted.
And, yeah, the healing.
The healing took place.
Speaker 1 (15:39):
That's amazing.
And what, and at what point inthis journey where you like I
have a gift or I want to helpother people, like, how did that
happen for you?
Speaker 3 (15:50):
Yeah, so I initially always had this thought in my
head that I was here forsomething more.
I think a lot of us maybe comehere onto this earth with a
greater mission before maybewe're even born, who knows?
Whatever, whatever you believein doesn't matter, but I always
felt from a young age that I washere for something more.
(16:11):
But I could never really painta picture of what that was or
what that felt like or what thatlooked like.
So when I started to do thosepractices regular yoga, regular
meditation, regular, like I said, connection to myself it kind
of just started to unfold.
I would say that I reallyreally felt that call when the
(16:32):
pandemic hit.
So I actually did my 200 houryoga teacher training the three
weeks before they shut all ofNew York and everything down.
So this was like 6am to 9pmevery single day intensity and,
of course, if you're doing yoga,meditation and breath work
every day for three weeks,you're probably going to have a
(16:53):
spiritual awakening or someweird things are going to start
happening to you, and that'spretty much what started
happening to me.
I would start to get a lot ofvisions.
I would just start to seethings in different lenses, so
to speak, and that was when Istarted to really feel that call
.
We were in complete lockdownmode.
I was living at the yoga ashram.
(17:14):
There was maybe only 50 otherpeople there, and when there's
only 50 people there, you'reseeing the same people every
single day.
I started to really just wantto help and want to show people
that there is another way.
I really felt like of course, alot of people experienced a lot
of mental health issues or maybethe first time actually having
(17:37):
to sit with themselves, and Ifound that the practices that I
had been doing had really put mymindset in a different state,
as well as knowing that when westart to come into more peace
and calm in the body, we canautomatically enter into more
spaces like joy or feeling morelight, and I knew that that
(17:59):
avenue for me and probably a lotof other people, was just
starting to do these practices.
So, little by little, I startedto show up online and start to
share and then, maybe I want tosay a year after the pandemic, I
left and I had this wholelittle business plan and that's
where Heal From the Inside Out,this whole idea, came to life
(18:23):
and, yeah, it's been a beautifuljourney since then.
Speaker 1 (18:27):
I love that.
Speaker 2 (18:29):
So you work with women only or primarily.
Speaker 3 (18:36):
Primarily women.
I have worked with men in thepast, but I've felt this deeper
call to continue to help womenspecifically, probably like you
have the call to help men, too,as well.
Speaker 2 (18:49):
Yeah Well, for me it's a byproduct of being a
member of a men's communityfirst and then growing within
that community to start servingother men, so I don't know that
I would ultimately limit myselfto men only.
It's just where I've learnedand the language that I speak,
obviously, and where I can bringthe most value at the moment.
(19:13):
So when a woman is likestarting from zero, let's say
and zero in the sense that theydon't have a background in doing
work like this, they don't havean understanding of what it
looks like, how do you sort ofpaint the picture of what this
(19:33):
experience of working with youmight be?
Speaker 3 (19:36):
So it really depends where the woman is coming from,
because with the broad spectrumof women, this could be someone
who is maybe 50 or 60 years old.
She's lived her whole life andshe just doesn't feel fulfilled
and maybe she's going throughthat midlife crisis where she's
waking up, or maybe the woman isearlier in her mid-20s, 30s.
(20:02):
Once again, that feeling ofthis isn't working.
There's something more for me,I think, where I really meet a
lot of women is in that space ofstarting to question, because
when we're so rigid in our oneway of thinking or how we
thought our whole lives, how ourparents have thought, the
values or the systems instilledupon us, it's hard to break out
(20:25):
of that, unless you are alreadystarting to do some of that
initial work or just starting tobecome curious and wonder
what's going on here.
There is something more outthere for me, and I don't know
who or what to do.
That's usually where I meet alot of women.
(20:46):
The other place is, I feel thata lot of women are constantly
and I know this is where I wasmyself in our minds, so, like
when we're completely in ourminds, we're completely in our
logical, analytical thinking,maybe in our masculine, so to
speak.
A lot of the times, we forgetabout what makes us unique as a
(21:08):
female-bodied woman, which isgonna be everything that's
happening from the neck down ouractual physical body.
So that could be starting toget a sense.
This is what I love to work onwomen with get a sense of
starting to understand yourbody's natural signals, your
body's natural cues, especiallywhen it comes to intuition.
(21:30):
So like, yes, we all haveintuition, but how many times do
we actually cut ourselves offfrom it because of stress or
because of trauma, or because wedon't have a sense of trust for
ourselves?
So, beginning to allow women tofeel again, and that's where we
start to add those practiceswhen it comes to breathwork,
(21:51):
when it comes to even justmindfulness, mindfulness when it
comes to the body that's whenwe can get into those deeper
layers, because I feel like thebody of course there's that book
the Body Keeps the Score.
That's really where a lot ofthose hidden answers are gonna
be.
Speaker 1 (22:09):
So let's talk a little bit more about women who
are not in touch with theirintuition, because I think it's
a product of environment and,like you said, trauma and
society, that there's a lot, of,a lot placed on our shoulders
especially.
I mean I can speak for myselfas a.
I'm a mom, I'm a business ownerand I feel like I always feel
(22:31):
like I have a lot on myshoulders.
I'm also like in the public andsometimes you let people
outside voices kind of influencehow you feel about certain
situations, how you feel aboutyourself, and I feel like
intuition is like a muscle thatneeds to be practiced and the
less you use it, the less intouch you are with it.
So can you like dive into thata little bit more?
Speaker 3 (22:54):
Yeah, yeah, I love that.
So I like to do little games,so to speak, and they can be so
simple.
You can do these games withyourself to begin to develop
this muscle, like you're saying,for example, you might have a
day off and this is your daywhere you might spend it.
(23:15):
This is an example, becauseI've definitely done this before
.
Maybe you spend it Netflix andchilling.
You spend it binge watching aseries.
Instead, what if you allowedyourself that space and allowed
yourself that day to go outsideand then lead with what starts
to light you up where your bodystarts to want to go?
So this would be an experimentof okay, you walk outside, your
(23:39):
mind maybe starts to go to themaybe not so good habits that
you have.
Oh, I'm gonna get a croissant,or I'm gonna not saying a
croissant is bad, but you knowwhat I mean.
Yeah, whatever the happens, itcould be worse than a croissant.
Speaker 2 (23:52):
Yeah, my drug dealer's right down the street,
yeah yeah, yeah yeah, yeah.
Speaker 3 (23:59):
But instead it's like , okay, I'm going outside in
this moment, okay, what does mybody start to want to do?
What feels expansive in my bodyright now?
Does it feel expansive for meto go right or to go left?
Do I usually always go rightbecause that's the way to the
park, or do I really wanna trysomething different today and it
(24:20):
feels a little bit moreexciting?
Or as if it feels like yourbody is expanding to go left and
then from there continuing toallow your body to be the
mechanism of what allows you tofeel that expansion.
And then from that space ofexpansion, that's where you also
feel that joy.
So it's maybe inviting inthings that feel a little more
(24:43):
playful for you that day.
I think so many women cut offintuition because they also cut
off the inner child that wantsto be in their joy, wants to
play, wants to do a sillyintuitive dance or to sing or to
scream.
So how can we start to invitein that sense of expansion and
(25:12):
playfulness and from that,that's where the intuition
starts to light up a little bitmore.
So, taking that day off anddoing something fun.
Speaker 1 (25:22):
No, I love that idea.
Now let's expand a little biton inner child.
So if somebody is just likelistening to this, doesn't know
all this jargon, that we knowwhat is the inner child Like,
can you get into that a littlebit more?
Yeah?
Speaker 3 (25:36):
so I've how I've personally connected to the
inner child is in so manydifferent levels of the child
itself.
For me personally, I don'tremember a lot of my childhood,
so maybe some other people areon that boat where they
experienced a lot of trauma orthey disassociated and they
literally left their body formaybe a lot of traumatic events.
(25:58):
Connecting to the inner childmight be a little challenging.
How I usually see it is youusually remember things in like
seven year increments, Cause Iin seven years.
I know that, like the brainrewires itself, a lot of
different things happen in thespan of seven years.
Speaker 2 (26:17):
Maybe Tony can expand a little bit All of your cells
in your entire body outside ofthe central nervous system,
because your central nervoussystem doesn't regenerate
cellular growth, which is why alot of people in the field that
you're in and we work in believethat trauma is stored in the
central nervous system.
But every other cell in yourbody will replace itself over
the course of seven years, notin seven year rotations, but
(26:39):
every seven years.
You will have new cellulargrowth in each part of your body
.
They all move at a differentpace, but yeah.
Speaker 3 (26:46):
Beautiful.
So for me, because of that, Iguess I remember things in seven
year increments, so to speak.
So I remember this part of methat was seven years old and she
maybe this was before she wasmore tainted, she was more
playful, more silly.
I have this really funny memoryof myself running.
(27:08):
I was completely naked.
I ran outside in my backyardand I'm just running around and
like feeling so free, feeling soopen.
So for me that's a beautifulmemory of myself when I'm seven
years old.
Then I think back to 14, okay,I was a teenager.
I remember feeling so secludedand like I was so scared of what
(27:30):
other people thought of me.
I was so shut down for myself,shut down for my emotions.
So of course, that memory isone oh, we wanna revisit that
because there's something there,there's some belief system work
to do there, and then fromthere it's like okay, we're
moving on to 21.
In college, what was thatversion of you?
So there's so many differentareas, I think, of the inner
(27:51):
child that we can revisit.
But a great way to start tounlock some of these memories is
to move into a meditationspecifically for it.
So this would essentially besomeone, either me or someone on
the internet even, you couldtype in inner child healing and,
of course, do this when you'rein a safe space, maybe even
(28:13):
finding a therapist to do thiswork with too as well.
This would be really starting todive into in a systematic way
what is a version of you thatyou connect to, where it felt
off for you, where you maybe hada very challenging childhood or
challenging experience, andthen from there, that's when we
(28:36):
can start to see okay, well,what needs to be healed here,
what are some of the beliefsthat were instilled upon you
because of that experience, andfrom there then you could start
to invite in the healingcomponents, which would be, like
I said, inviting in maybe someof the play that comes with it,
inviting in some of the feminineaspects, like the dance, the
(28:58):
vocal toning, all of that stuffto help move that out of the
system and then to also gain adeeper sense of awareness and
perspective when it comes tothat version of you.
The other thing, last but notleast, is I always recommend any
of the clients that I have tohave a photo of yourself at that
(29:18):
age that feels tender for you.
So maybe it's that seven yearold version of yourself, or
younger, you have on your iPhoneor you have in front of your
mirror and just giving reverenceto that version of you every
day, giving her the tender loveand affection and maybe just
even witnessing yourself sayingI love you, I love all aspects
(29:41):
of you in the mirror.
All really, really healing inour child practices.
Speaker 1 (29:47):
Yeah, I remember the first few times I did like inner
child meditations.
Like the first one was like thisis really weird.
And then the second time I waslike, okay, I'm gonna try to
like lean into this and I thinkthe meditation that I had it was
like me as an adult like nowbasically meeting my younger
self, like at a park orsomething like that and giving
(30:11):
my younger self a hug, and itwas like and I just started
crying it was so like beautifuland intense and like it was like
the first time I met like myinner kid and it was just like
my first time getting in touchwith that side of me and it's
like very powerful and I thinkthat's a really good starting
point for people is to just getin touch with that younger part
(30:34):
of yourself and see where theyare and like what their needs
are and what's missing for them,what maybe things that were
missing from your childhood andgiving them that love that you
felt was like missing.
It's really hardcore, but it'samazing Like 15 minutes and it
could do so much for yourself-esteem.
(30:57):
I feel like.
Speaker 2 (30:58):
I mean.
And then the next level, for itis like, once you have access
to it and you start to get intouch with that inner child,
then you can give yourselfpermission to take that version
of you into every part of yourday.
You can take that because, likeyou were saying, the inner
child has access unfetteredaccess to joy, unfettered access
(31:21):
to gratitude, unfettered accessto play, because they are not
bound by the traumas that we are, they're not bound by the rules
of being an adult, being a mom,being a person with a job and
responsibilities.
But if you can bring that partof you with you into the rest of
your day, it'll allow you tohave the access to any access to
(31:41):
joy and gratitude, even withinthe rules that we play by and
the responsibilities that wehold now as adults.
Speaker 3 (31:48):
Yes, 100%.
And one thing that's coming tomind, as you're saying that,
we're still in the new year andI, this past weekend, did my
vision board.
I think that a vision board andI mean like the grab newspapers
not newspapers but magazines,actually, if you can find them,
maybe you have a group offriends that can come together,
(32:09):
bring their old magazines, andhaving that space to be like an
inner child play date is sohealing, how I recommend.
Speaker 1 (32:20):
We love it.
Speaker 2 (32:21):
We do that.
Speaker 1 (32:22):
Yeah, we do that.
It's so much fun.
It's hard to find magazinesthese days.
Speaker 2 (32:26):
We did struggle with the magazine part of the process
but we ultimately we printedand clipped whatever we couldn't
source through magazines.
But magazines were harder tofind than we thought.
Speaker 3 (32:37):
So true.
And then it gets very expensivereally quick If you do find the
magazines.
Speaker 1 (32:43):
Yes, that is true, yeah but vision boarding is a
lot of fun because you can justbe creative with it and just let
your dreams run wild and it's areally fun kind of a fun
feeling too.
Yeah.
Speaker 3 (32:55):
And then, if you wanna add that intuition
component, like you were talkingabout, it's like can I bring it
back down and into my body?
When I see an image, does thatlight up every single cell of my
body, that's gonna be the thingyou wanna clip out.
If it's something that's like,ooh, no, don't want, that
doesn't feel good, and it'salmost like this is when we
(33:16):
start to listen somatically toour body.
Oh, it starts to make me wannapush away or my shoulders hunch
down and back.
That's when you wanna continuemoving on.
It's like, oh, that's not forme at this time.
Can I make this board?
That thing that makes me wannastand in like power pose, with
the arms open, the chest open,and just every time you look at
(33:38):
it it's like that sensation ofjoy.
Speaker 1 (33:42):
And tell me a little bit more how important for women
specifically being in touchwith their intuition is when it
comes to setting boundaries andit really like loving yourself
fully.
Because I feel like womenespecially, we tend to be people
pleasers.
We tend to be uncomfortablewith our anger, we tend to be
(34:05):
uncomfortable saying no.
We wanna please everybody, wewanna say yeah.
I know that this is an issuefor a lot of women and has been
an issue for me until I did thework and that I was able to get
to a place where I could say noor I could set boundaries for
myself or I could tell people myneeds, like even attracting a
healthy relationship, being ableto say to Tony, like these are
(34:27):
the things that I need in arelationship or in that sort of
thing.
So can we dive into that alittle bit?
Speaker 3 (34:34):
Yeah, so for myself, I noticed that when I really
needed to express myself, butfor I would say, for my whole
life, my throat was very, veryblocked off, but I would
viscerally feel the sensationsin my neck Like and I think
we've all had that experiencewhen you're like I need to say
(34:55):
something, it's right there, Ifeel it and it's like you're
holding back and you could feelyourself holding back.
So for women, when you cancontinue to come back into that
body and actually notice thosesensations, you'll begin to
notice, in moments where you areholding yourself back, where
(35:16):
you aren't expressing that no oryou aren't expressing that yes,
how many times we actuallydon't say yes to the things we
really desire and really want.
So a big thing here for settingboundaries is going to be
continuing to, like I said, comeback into the body and then use
(35:39):
it as that resource or thatsensation of knowing when it's
starting, you're starting to shyaway or hide back from
expressing.
And I know that the breath, ofcourse, bringing it back to the
breath is a big tool for beingable to finally express those
boundaries in a healthy way.
(36:00):
When we get outside of ourlogical thinking mind, we get
into the body and into thebreath.
Whatever you're not processingregularly or whatever is stored
in the body actually starts tocome out.
So I've noticed that when Ihave private clients for
emotional release breath workwhich is a different style than
(36:23):
regular calming, groundingbreath that you would do when
you have anxiety or stress whenyou do this technique you'll
start to notice.
I noticed the women that arereally holding back or playing
small.
Their jaw is so clenched andtheir mouth starts to get really
small like an O, and then ifyou have clenching intention
(36:45):
here, you know you have it inthe hips too.
So what are the hips?
The hips are also connected toour boundaries.
So there is this deepconnection when it comes to a
woman's womb, our boundarycenter, and then also when it
comes to your form of expression.
So when I noticed thathappening in the body, it's like
you wanna let out the biggestscream, the biggest yell, and
(37:06):
you know, through allowingyourself to just hear your own
voice shouting no or justscreaming and letting it all out
, that through that first off,there's usually always sadness
behind it, because there's apart of you that's maybe not
listening to, that inner childthat wants to say no, wants to
(37:27):
be in their power and theirtruth, but then you're also
getting to a point where it'sreleasing, and then those blocks
or that limitation isn't asintense the next time you have
an experience where you want tosay no and allow it to come
through.
Another thing that's been reallyhealing is that I lead a lot of
women circles and there are somany different practices you can
(37:50):
do just through an embodieddance that can be how are you
expressing your no, like?
What does it feel like to justpush away with your hands and to
like, do like a culley breathwith your tongue out, screaming
like no, and then also to haveother women witnessing you
(38:11):
saying that and being in yourboundary truth?
And then also, what does itlook like for a yes and to
actually feel desire or pleasurein your body?
Okay, then you can experienceand express that through your
own body, because that looksdifferent for each and every
person, but through the act ofdoing it and working with your
(38:34):
own system.
That is really what allows youto shift each and every new
expression that you have when itcomes to your boundaries.
Speaker 1 (38:47):
Beautiful.
Very cool, tony, you seem likeyou're in thought.
Speaker 2 (38:54):
No, it's all very much.
Yeah, you are doing the femaleversion of what I do with men,
essentially in terms of thebreath work and the expression
through it.
We probably use differentsystems of breath work, but very
much in line with it, because Idid have a question and I was
(39:16):
stalling until it came into mybrain and then it popped in.
Yeah, so you talked multipletimes about being lit up and
what it feels like in theexpansion, like even cellular,
like what it feels like to bemaking the right decision and
sort of based on the knowing andyour body's telling you this is
(39:38):
the way you should go.
How do you and you sort oftouched on it a little bit how
do you bring that idea to lifefor somebody who's going?
I've never been lit up in theway that you're describing I
don't know what, that this is aforeign language.
You're essentially asking themto tap into something that
they've never experienced.
(39:58):
How do you bring them from notunderstanding that to get to the
point where they're like, oh,that's it, I get it.
Speaker 3 (40:06):
Yeah.
So it kind of goes back to theinner child a little bit.
But your inner child knew howto play.
It knew the things that wereactually fun for you, that were
joyful for you.
Maybe we have very analyticalthinkers and maybe what was
joyous for them as a kid wasplaying with puzzles and problem
(40:28):
solving and maybe writing.
Or maybe for other people thatfeel a little more creative, it
was being outside, being innature.
Nature is an amazing place thatcan bring so much joy if you
allow it to or being creativeand just taking space to paint.
(40:49):
And I think the big overarchingthing here, when it comes to
starting to create a life thatis more joyous, is that you have
to continue to make the thingsthat maybe you didn't deem
important in the past asimportant and as purposeful just
of the state of doing it.
(41:09):
So, for example, when it comesto doing artwork, maybe you have
in your mind, oh, I don't wantto do this artwork, this is
stupid, there's no reason for meto do this right now.
I'm not an artist.
And then we start to paint ouridentity around it.
It's like that's not the reasonyou're doing it.
(41:30):
You're doing it for the fact ofthis, maybe just playing with
color in this moment is bringingyou joy.
It's not going to be the nextvan Gogh, but the point is to
begin to invite more of that inand a really, really great
practice for all of my cerebralpeople out there.
I'm very cerebral myself, so Iget it is going to be journaling
(41:54):
.
So what that would look like isliterally and this is actually
a practice I started doingduring my spiritual awakening
where I would essentially letwhatever needed to come through
to come through with no purposeat all.
So it could look like grabbingyour journal in the morning and
just starting to write outwhatever comes to mind.
So it could be right away youstarting to write out all the
(42:17):
things of oh, this is my to do,this is what I have to get done
today, xyz.
But then you reach a point whereit's like, oh, that's all done,
don't have to do that anymore.
So then can you see what allowsto come through you in that
moment when all of theessentials, the things that make
you feel safe, have to bewritten out and done, what comes
(42:37):
through after that?
And that's where you start toconnect into that deeper sense
of your inner core, your innerbeing.
And then I think the soulstarts to speak a little bit
more.
And the soul wants you to be inyour joy.
It wants you to be living thatlife that feels really free for
you, whatever that means for you.
Speaker 1 (42:57):
Are you ever in a bad mood?
Speaker 3 (43:01):
Yeah, so I think what's really changed for me is
having the practices to helpmyself.
Speaker 1 (43:12):
So when I am, I'm what do you do?
What do you do when you're likespiraling, like if you, you
know we all have our moments, nomatter how spiritual, and you
know we have the tools.
But what do you do when you'rejust like I fuck all this, yeah.
Speaker 3 (43:27):
So it's funny.
I did a silent meditationretreat at Karpalu.
It's in the Berkshires Greatplace, and one of the practices
that they had us do was towardsthe end of the retreat, when we
were all feeling really, reallygood and accomplished.
They had us write a letter toourselves to read when we feel
(43:47):
like complete shit, when it'sjust like you're at the end of
you know whatever, and you knowit's just one of those days.
So it could be writing yourselflike a future letter and being
like I'm going to read this whenI need it the most and it's
going to remind me, like what abadass person you are and that
you can do it and you just needrest and like can you allow
(44:09):
yourself to have rest?
It's as simple as that.
Or it's leaning on my practices,like every single day I have to
do breath work.
It's like breath translates tospirit literally and it helps me
one first off, just feelregulated in my nervous system
(44:30):
and then also just helps me feelmore connected, more connected
to myself and then moreconnected to the universe.
Breathwork, meditation, andthen you can't go wrong with
yoga Anytime you're like I don'twant to get up, I don't want to
go on my mat.
I don't want to go to yogapractice.
I promise you, if you just makethat initial step of opening up
(44:50):
your yoga mat or booking aclass and walking to the class,
you will stop spiraling afterthat yoga class.
Something about actually doingand using the breath and using
your body as that vehicle to getyou out out of your own way,
out of your head, is really whatshifts it.
Speaker 1 (45:13):
Can you walk us through your daily morning
routine and night routine, yourdaily practices?
What does that look like foryou?
What time do you wake up andwhat do you eat?
What do you drink?
All that stuff?
Speaker 3 (45:24):
Sure, I love it.
So I don't even want to tellyou guys, because I know you
guys are amazing with yourmorning practices.
No, not always.
Speaker 1 (45:34):
Listen, listen.
No, we're not.
This is not always, of coursenot always.
Speaker 3 (45:39):
I spab every morning.
Speaker 2 (45:42):
Also not every morning, that's like four to
five times a week.
But it's funny becauseeverybody all the people that
are living a life of somepurpose, some drive and ambition
and wellness we all wannacompare notes on the morning
(46:02):
rituals and the nightly rituals.
We all wanna compare notes andsee what everybody else is doing
and it's easy to forget that itis so much more important just
to have some and to have some ofthat structure in place than
what it literally is right, like, so like our morning rituals
could be different than the nextsuccessfully living person's
(46:24):
rituals.
But the theme is that everybodyhas something that they fall on
or they start their day withand then they go to bed with.
But it's funny.
Speaker 1 (46:34):
It's interesting because people think that we
have our morning routine dialedin but we don't.
Like we have a kid and someweeks we're like on point and
we're working out and we'remeditating and we're doing the
cold plunge and we're having agreen smoothie and all that
stuff and then some mornings.
It's a fucking shit show, youknow what I mean, and like we're
lucky to get like one thing inand that's just the way it is,
(46:57):
but like we keep going back toour practices.
Speaker 2 (47:00):
But the differences for everyone that's listening is
that we ultimately gotourselves to a place where, if
there's a day that gets likejust completely ran over by
chaos and unpredictability, wecan flip the switch back the
next day.
It's not like we have to startfrom zero and rebuild, Like we
have it in our pockets, Like allright back to the playbook.
(47:20):
We're good.
But it's the people that likeare building something and
building the sacred dailyrituals that, if you're not in a
place of like this is secondnature to me and then something
comes by and derails you.
Speaker 1 (47:33):
Now you're reset to zero and you know it's not
everybody needs to do a morningritual necessarily.
Like maybe you're more of likea midday ritual person or a
nighttime right?
So like tell us what a typicalday yeah it is for you.
Speaker 3 (47:47):
So I usually every day is a little different based
on my schedule, but I do try towake up by seven and when I wake
up, sometimes I check my phoneand if you're listening to this
and you check your phone, it'sokay.
While I would love to say thatyou know, every morning I get up
my phone's away from my bed andyou know it's this beautiful,
(48:10):
glorious thing.
Yeah, sometimes I use it as away to get up.
So I get up.
I try to get sunlight on myface first thing in the morning,
so usually by the time I'mopening the blinds, there is sun
beaming, of course, if it's notraining or snowing or anything
like that spend just a couple ofminutes there feeling the sun
(48:32):
on my face.
I try to take a few breathsjust to feel grounded in that
moment, and then from there, youknow, after the brushing teeth
and all of that stuff, I go intothe kitchen.
I do infuse things that I'velearned from Arruveta over the
years.
So something really amazing todo is to drink warm water with
(48:56):
lemon.
If you want to make it extra,you can add honey, because it
has this scraping quality to thebody, so it starts to release
toxins.
Okay, we need to add honey.
Speaker 2 (49:05):
Add some honey nurse.
Speaker 1 (49:06):
Yeah, I do Okay.
Speaker 3 (49:09):
And then from there I have a morning coffee and I
start to make the morningsmoothie.
Usually I always add for awhile I was doing the medical
medium, his detox smoothie.
Now I kind of yeah, yeah, yeah.
So I was doing that for yearsactually.
And then now I've kind of comeup with my own little
(49:30):
combination I have it's like a.
It's cleansing greens for theliver.
It's a powder from Anna MamundiHerbal's so I put that in my
smoothie, usually have spinach,banana, wild blueberries, add
orange juice or some oat milk toit, blend it all up.
(49:51):
Usually that's my firstbreakfast of the morning.
I don't have more breakfastthan that, but that's my
breakfast of the morning.
Speaker 2 (49:59):
And then and middle day breakfast.
Speaker 3 (50:02):
Yeah, yeah, yeah, right, I try to only have three
meals a day From there.
I usually try to, of course.
I make the bed and then I gointo my office, which I have a
little altar off to the sidethat I usually try to hide and
that is what has, you know, allof my little spiritual goodies
(50:23):
on it and I try to meditate inthat space.
What I love to do is actuallyspend a little bit more time
doing breath than the actualmeditation.
So what that looks like is, ifI have 30 minutes, it would be
20 minutes of breath work andthen 10 minutes of meditation.
So my breath practices change.
(50:45):
And if you're a female bodilyowner, then I recommend to not
do intense breath work practiceswhen you're actually on your
menstrual cycle.
So when I'm on my menstrualcycle, my breath techniques are
more calming to the body, moredownward focusing.
So you know that would meanextension of the exhale versus
(51:08):
the inhale, getting more oxygenor air on the exhale versus the
inhale.
But usually when I am not on mycycle I do more upward focusing
breath practices.
So that could mean breath offire.
That could mean moreintensifying and oxygenating and
(51:31):
detoxifying breath practices.
Kundalini yoga breath practices, if you had to research a term.
And then when I start to sinkinto that, my mind and my body
are already prepped formeditation.
So then usually I'll do a 10minute meditation.
(51:51):
After that breath I like to pulla card lately for the day.
So I've been pulling an Oraclecard deck.
I have this Rose Oracle deck byRebecca Campbell that I love.
If you wanna just look her upas a person, she's amazing,
rebecca Campbell.
And then from there usuallythat's my morning.
(52:13):
I like to exercise in themorning if I get the chance, but
if I don't, then I'll exerciseat night.
Try to get movement in at leastonce a day, yes, and then
throughout the day variousthings, whether that be a
one-on-one coaching sessionSometimes I do a lot of
(52:34):
corporate wellness calls, so Ihave those stacked up a lot of
the days and then at night.
Nighttime is like my favoritefavorite thing to really really
start to calm the body down.
I love to have tea at night, solike a very cleansing herbal
tea.
I love yeah, lynn does it Same.
(52:59):
If you're a Trader Joe's fan, Ilove to get the sleepy time tea
I think it's called somethinglike that and the chamomile in
combination with other herbsalready prepare your body for
bedtime.
I try to limit phone use, ofcourse, at night, and then when
(53:20):
I actually step into the bedroom, first thing I do is I turn off
all the lights and I put acandle on.
Just already starting to switchthe environment from daytime to
nighttime with the candlereally just relaxes my nervous
system.
I then what I really really loveto do and I honestly recommend
(53:41):
this to all my clients is tohave a practice of releasing
anything that you came incontact with during the day.
So you can call this prayer,you can call this cord cutting,
whatever you wanna call it.
It's like can you take for me?
I like to actually havesomething physical.
So I'll sage my room or I'llpalo santo it, and then I'll
(54:05):
just stand right beside my bedand start to say I release
anything I came in contact withtoday.
I release the cord with, andI'll name specific people that I
spend a lot of time withthroughout the day Just more of
these energetic practices toespecially being a healer, so to
(54:26):
speak, to release that from myphysical being.
And then from there I usuallyfeel sleepy after letting go of
all the other things from theday, and I start to sink into
bed with a book, and then Ialways fall asleep after the
first three pages.
(54:48):
So if you have trouble sleepingjust read a book at night,
you'll be fine.
Speaker 1 (54:53):
So Love Island before bed is probably not a good idea
.
Speaker 2 (54:57):
Hey, listen, that's our smudging.
Speaker 1 (55:00):
That's how we smudge.
Speaker 2 (55:02):
No, but I have a mentor that does exactly what
you're talking about.
He comes together with his wifeand they release all of the
stuff that they picked up fromeverybody along the day.
She does women's work, he doesmen's work, and you come in
contact and you it's not thatyou take on other people's stuff
, but you're in contact withother people's stuff like all
(55:24):
day long.
So I love the idea.
Speaker 1 (55:26):
We should start doing that.
Speaker 2 (55:27):
Yeah, I love the idea of kind of just it's not
getting rid of or anything likethat, but it's just like
releasing, just releasing anysort of things that you picked
up throughout the day, that'sone, and what I'm picking up
from all the people that we'vebeen interviewing lately, all
these wellness people, is thatwe need to start drinking
smoothies in the morning.
Speaker 1 (55:46):
I think we need to get on back on the smoothie
train On the smoothie train.
I used to really drive thesmoothie train the last three
people that we've interviewed,each and every one of said that
they have a smoothie in themorning, yeah so.
Speaker 3 (56:00):
Well, something I want to say there though.
Is.
So this comes back to.
Are you Veda?
If you're a very airy person,so this is the person that's
like, always on the go.
They're maybe have a lot ofanxious tendencies, have a lot
of thoughts, they're in theirhead a lot.
A smoothie sometimes mightactually be too much for your
(56:21):
digestive system because it'scold.
So are you Vedically speaking?
If you have Vata is what it'scalled the Doshia, then that'll
actually yeah, so you're finewith smoothies.
But if you have cold and you'relike that airy person, I don't
know what am I?
Speaker 1 (56:40):
You might feel a little more airy person.
Speaker 3 (56:42):
Well, usually your combination.
So what I do because I am aVata, I'm an airy person and a
Pitta too combo.
I add bananas and avocado to mysmoothie and I try to not have
it like.
I never add ice, I try to haveit like at room temperature.
So that's what works for me.
I can't have like raw salad andlike with like barely any
(57:08):
dressing or raw foods.
In general.
It is horrible to digest thedigestive tract.
If you are of the qualities inmy body, it's really adding more
warmth into the system.
Speaker 1 (57:23):
Do you do like a quiz online to determine like what
you are?
Sure are you?
Speaker 3 (57:29):
Vediccom.
Yeah, there are quizzes.
Speaker 1 (57:31):
Yeah, yeah, yeah, Rick, how.
So how do people find you?
Where can they follow you, andall that good stuff.
Speaker 3 (57:39):
Awesome.
So it's pretty much my firstname and my last name for
everything.
It's Raquel Ravello.
On Instagram, raquelravellocomfor my website.
Usually I post a lot of what Ihave coming up on Instagram and
my website's under constructionright now so you won't get the
(57:59):
most up to date stuff, but it'salways nice to take a peek.
If you feel called, always justshoot me a DM or you could send
me an email at hello atRaquelRavellocom, and I'm always
happy to dive in deeper there.
Speaker 1 (58:14):
Well, thank you so much for having us.
Speaker 2 (58:18):
Yeah, for having us Sorry.
Thank you for sharing thisspace with us today.
Speaker 1 (58:25):
That's the right thing to say.
Speaker 2 (58:27):
No, it was an awesome , awesome conversation.
Yeah, we loved it.
Speaker 1 (58:30):
Yeah, thanks again, thank you guys, and we'll
definitely talk soon.
Bye.
Hey, welcome to the Lynn and Tony Know podcast.
I'm your host, lynn.
Speaker 2 (00:04):
And I'm Tony.
We are both wellness coachesand married with kids.
Speaker 1 (00:07):
Join us as we talk about all things health,
wellness, relationships, lifehacks, parenting and everything
in between unfiltered.
Thanks for listening and let'sget into it.
Welcome to the show, welcomeback.
I am very excited, for I know Ikeep saying that but like we've
been having like reallyexciting guests and I'm just an
excited person you know Listen.
(00:28):
I mean, our listeners are gonnabe like.
This bitch is always excited.
Speaker 2 (00:32):
It would be weird if you opened up and be like we
have a guest on it's kind ofwhatever, but here we go.
No, but I'm legitimatelyexcited.
Speaker 1 (00:38):
I know, I know and also, like what I love about all
our guests is that I have apersonal connection with each
and every one of them and it'skind of like really wonderful
how just people you meet, justkind of the divine intervention
of bringing those people backinto your life to kind of talk
about things that reallyinterest me and you know our
(01:00):
spirituality and yeah, it's abeautiful thing.
Speaker 2 (01:03):
No, that's awesome and all of our guests are
legitimately exciting.
Speaker 1 (01:08):
So today we have Raquel, and I met her when I was
okay, so I was seven monthspregnant.
It was last October.
I was very, very pregnant and Iwas kind of in the state of
pregnancy where I was like atthe end and I was feeling like
over it, but I was also likereally afraid of of, you know,
(01:29):
becoming a mom again after, youknow, 10 years of you know.
Mia was 10 years old and it'slike, oh my God, I'm doing this
again and I was dealing with alot of like, a lot of things
were coming up for me.
And Soul Spirit is a local yogastudio here in Jersey City and
I was doing prenatal yoga andthe owner, Liz, is like just a
(01:49):
beautiful human being and herand Raquel did a retreat, a
woman's retreat.
Speaker 2 (01:56):
That's how I'm at Now .
The pieces are coming together,yeah.
Speaker 1 (01:58):
So I'm like pregnant, like massive, and I signed up
for this retreat.
It was like in Long Island andit required me to drive like
three, four hours and I was likewhat the hell am I doing?
This is crazy.
But like everything in my soulwas like you need this, you need
this time on your own, you needthis time to connect with other
women, you need to work some ofyour stuff out before you have
(02:22):
this baby, and it was just kindof like a divine thing that
pushed me there, pushed me to go, cause you remember, like the
day before I was like I don'tknow if I want to go, like I
don't feel comfortable driving100%.
And Tony actually went on amen's retreat that weekend and
it was like the first time in awhile that we were like
separated from each other andespecially, you know, during
pregnancy it's a very vulnerabletime and you want to be with
(02:43):
your partner.
Well, in my case, I was likevery attached and it was like a
hard thing but it was likenecessary and I went on this
retreat and I was surrounded byjust the most beautiful women
and so encouraging and it wassuch a like a healing space and
I worked through a lot of likemy fears, and Raquel did like
(03:03):
some breath work and we did someyoga and we did some sound bowl
, like healing, and I had likesome moments of like you know,
kind of like breakdowns.
I guess you know like I brokedown crying in a few of the
moments and I was I don't evenremember about what made like
I'm going to ask Raquel actuallyto maybe remind me if she
(03:25):
remembers but yeah, it was abeautiful, beautiful moment and
I left.
I left the retreat feeling justrenewed and just ready for like
the journey and I was just like, yeah, it's really beautiful to
be surrounded by other womenand it's just something that I
was like I need to do more ofthis.
And fast forward to a couple ofmonths ago.
(03:45):
I started feeling this likestagnant energy and I reached
out to Raquel to do some breathwork with her and it also was
like an hour and we did breath,we talked about like what I'm
feeling and we did the breathwork and I felt like this huge
release and some clarity aroundcertain things that I needed in
(04:05):
life.
And so, yeah, she's on the showand she's just like, if you
follow her, she just like a rayof light, just so positive and
like especially in this fuckedup world that we live in with
all this negativity.
I love following just likewomen that are just like just
empowering and happy and youknow, living their truth and
encouraging, and it's just likea wonderful thing.
(04:27):
So I'm excited to kind of likeget into it with her.
So I'm going to read her bio.
So Raquel is a women's body, manand breath work coach on a
mission to help women get out oftheir heads and into their
bodies inherent wisdom toconnect deeper to the core of
who they are.
After years of struggling withvarious health related issues,
from Lyme's disease to chronicstress, anxiety and fatigue, as
(04:49):
well as a complete disconnectionfrom her body and emotional
world, she went on a journey toheal and look within.
Through her book, or herjourney, raquel immersed herself
into the world of holistichealth and healing practices as
a trained holistic health coachDavid Elliott, breath work and
facilitator, advanced Pranayamaguide, 200 hour Hatha and Yen
yoga teacher, organizationalmindfulness and meditation
(05:10):
instructor and reiki master,raquel loves to empower women
with somatic body based tools tocalm their nervous system,
connect deeper within and comehome to their true nature so
that they too can lead a life ofpurpose and connected to their
unique feminine essence.
Speaker 3 (05:24):
Welcome to the show.
Thank you so much, oh my gosh.
And thank you for diving alittle bit deeper as to how we
know each other and just quicklywant to touch on the one thing
that you said of really how whatbrought you on the journey of
coming to the retreat was thatyour soul just kept saying I
need to do this.
I don't know what it is.
(05:44):
I'm so pregnant.
It's probably not ideal for meto drive all the way out to Long
Island, but listening to thathas really also been a little
guiding force on my journey, soI just want to say thank you for
sharing that.
Thank you.
Speaker 1 (05:59):
And you know, actually the whole, even the
whole thing of me driving on myown, like it was like my first
time in months where I was alonewith myself and my thoughts,
like driving in the car, and itwas like you know it's, it's a
beautiful out, it's like fall,and it was just kind of like I
get to be into, I get to be withmyself right now, and I think a
lot of times with women,especially moms, we're so busy
(06:20):
taking care of other people thateven just that moment of being
with your thoughts and beingalone is like few and far in
between and that was like reallynice and I was like, oh yeah, I
am an individual, like I'm Lynn, you know, and that was a
really nice thing.
So let's talk a little bitabout like the retreat, you know
, and what that was like.
(06:41):
And I'm sure people are curiouslike what, what goes, what
happens in these?
You know, you see people goingon retreats and like people say
I'm going to a retreat, likewhat happened?
And you automatically think ofthat show with Nicole Kinman.
You know that show perfect nineperfect strangers.
You watched it with me.
Speaker 2 (06:58):
Oh yeah, yeah, Did you watch it?
No, I haven't no.
Speaker 1 (07:03):
So like it's kind of like a kooky, you think, like a
people think it's like a kookything, like what?
What goes on at these retreats?
Speaker 3 (07:09):
So it's really, really funny that you ended up
at a retreat, because that'sactually what sparked my healing
journey was going on a retreatmyself.
So so many different things canhappen at a retreat, but
because of my background andwhat I really learned, I like to
include yoga, meditation,breath work.
But for a lot of people it'sjust a chance to get outside of
(07:33):
their day to day.
First off, we're usually all inthe same environment 24, seven,
around the same people.
So just taking a moment to putyourself outside of that already
creates this level ofdiscomfort that creates a deeper
sense of just starting to lookat ourselves from a different
perspective.
And then, on top of that, youhave all of these women coming
together and they're also apoint of reflection.
(07:56):
I don't know how many timesthroughout the retreat you heard
someone mentioning something ontheir own journey and you're
like, oh, I can relate so muchto that.
I didn't really look at that inthat light.
Or I haven't even had a chance,after all of these years of
being in my regular, typicalnine to five or work schedule,
to get to begin to look a littledeeper within.
(08:20):
So I would say the main thingsthat happen at retreat is just
that opportunity.
Maybe it's a week, a weekendlong thing, maybe you go on a 10
day of a postnat retreat andthings get a little wild, but it
is just that moment to look alittle deeper within and then
get to have other people reflectto you the different things
(08:41):
that really are looking to maybebe healed or to discover a
little bit more at that spaceand time.
Speaker 1 (08:50):
So tell us a little bit more about your journey to
becoming who you are today, yourhealing journey, I guess, your
spiritual journey to becomebasically a healer right.
Speaker 3 (09:00):
Well, yes, right, I feel like as healers.
Whenever someone says thatthey're like you're a healer,
it's like oh, do I really wantto claim myself as that?
Especially, you know so manywomen.
I feel like we've had decadesof just suppression.
So for someone to say that toyou it's like oh, my God, am I a
healer?
So thank you for a hot thing.
Yeah, I got it.
Well, the other thing.
Speaker 2 (09:21):
you can call it and this is something that I've
taken on in the men's work thatI do a facilitator, because
everybody does their own healing, essentially like when it's
true healing they do their ownhealing.
The body and the mind, the soul, can heal itself and then there
are people that will facilitateand know how to open the
avenues towards that healing andpoint you in the right
(09:41):
direction.
So it's like facilitating isanother word that I think would
be maybe more comfortable than ahealer.
Speaker 1 (09:50):
I like the.
I think she's a healer.
She has like you know, she hasa talent.
And I think her life, you knowher life story, brought her to
where she is.
So, yes, tell us, tell us more.
Speaker 3 (10:00):
healer Of course, thank you, thank you.
So my journey really gotstarted.
This was pre pandemic, pretalks on mental health, and I
was actually working incorporate fashion and during
this phase of my life I wasfresh out of school, I really
was my whole life.
(10:21):
I would say it was very, verydriven.
I always had that when at allcosts work yourself to the point
of complete burnout, completeexhaustion, really just overall
thinking that my success wasdetermined on what I produce and
what I achieve.
So this, right off the bat, wasreally the lens or the
viewpoint of how I was justviewing my life and it was a bit
(10:45):
of a wake up call.
During that time period,working in just corporate
fashion and seeing, okay, myhealth is actually suffering a
lot, a lot, a lot.
Knowing that, you know, I wasworking in a stressful
environment, of course, on topof that, but I was having
insomnia, sleepless nights, Inoticed myself having panic
attacks I would say a healthy,non healthy little dose of IBS
(11:09):
or gastrointestinal issues, andall of it really stemming from
this deeper layer of completenervous system dysregulation,
not being out of space where Ihonored my body, I honored my
emotions and overall, just notknowing myself at a deeper level
, only ever focusing on theoutward, the outward appearance,
(11:30):
the outward achieving.
So during this little phase ofmy life, my partner who I'm
still with at this time he hadthis brilliant idea to go on a
little bit of a weekend retreat.
So this was a yoga retreat andthis was supposed to be
inversion.
So if you know a little bitabout yoga, this is the
headstands or you know theintense aspects of yoga that
(11:52):
maybe a lot of us don't evenpractice in our day to day.
So, being this very go getterself, I was like, yes, we have a
weekend of like just flippingupside down.
This is going to be awesome.
Not thinking I'm going toactually take time to look at
myself.
So fast forward, go on thisamazing retreat.
What I didn't realize, that theemphasis or the focus of this
(12:13):
retreat was going to be actuallystarting to slow down.
One of the major components wasmeditation, and this was before
I had a meditation practice,before I really had a yoga
practice, and I remember thatweekend, the first time I
meditated.
I don't know what happened tome, but I felt like I was
floating.
(12:33):
I felt like the first time inmy life I actually felt a little
sense of a connection, a deeperconnection to who I am, at more
of a soul level or core, corelevel of self.
So fast forward.
I had this amazing experience,this little bit of an epiphany.
I get back to my nine to fivejob and right when I get there,
(12:54):
everyone in the office looks atme.
They're like what happened toyou, like there's something
different here.
It looks like you're glowing.
I was like, yeah, I feel likethat.
I had this awesome retreat andthen, before I know it, there is
this, you know, really intense,urgent thing that has to get
done, and right away I snap outof it and it's back to work mode
.
So I'm not even kidding you.
(13:15):
That day I remember sitting atmy desk and already applying to
essentially work at thismeditation center, this yoga
ashram, and essentially quit myjob and move there.
If I got the position and fastforward, maybe two weeks after
that I land this job doingdigital marketing for them,
which is essentially what I wasalready doing in corporate
(13:37):
fashion I end up having myapartment lease running out in
like the next three weeks.
So all at once, in a threeweeks time, I quit my job, leave
, you know, hoboken and I end upmoving to this yoga ashram in
the Poconos and really just likeletting, letting the world, the
(13:58):
universe kind of guide me, andduring that time I end up
spending about two years there.
I do my 200 hour yoga teachertraining, I'm studying holistic
health, ayurveda and just abunch of different practices
from you know, breath work,meditation, all those things.
But the biggest thing I want toemphasize here, when I made this
(14:21):
big decision, the first thing Iremember when I get to the yoga
ashram is I have, you know they, they wanted to give me a whole
week off.
And I'm like, guys, I don'tneed a whole week off.
Like I'm from New York, likelet's, let's get this party
started, let's get moving.
They're like, okay, you cancome in in two days, but we're
going to give you a little bitof space.
I get the whole room arranged,everything done in a couple of
(14:45):
hours, and then I'm twiddling mythumbs there and not knowing
what to do and I'm in the middleof nowhere.
It's not like you can just goand you know, pop over to a play
or entertain yourself in someway, distract yourself in some
way, but you actually have tosit there and be with yourself
and when you know, your mind iskind of like a prison, or at
(15:06):
least mine was during that time.
It was like complete and utterdread and I remember when I
finally started to sink in, Islept for like three months
straight.
I was completely burnt out.
My nervous system was at aphase of just trying to
understand itself, trying torewire and get out of fight or
(15:29):
flight mode, essentially.
So that's where my journeystarted.
And, yeah, the healing.
The healing took place.
Speaker 1 (15:39):
That's amazing.
And what, and at what point inthis journey where you like I
have a gift or I want to helpother people, like, how did that
happen for you?
Speaker 3 (15:50):
Yeah, so I initially always had this thought in my
head that I was here forsomething more.
I think a lot of us maybe comehere onto this earth with a
greater mission before maybewe're even born, who knows?
Whatever, whatever you believein doesn't matter, but I always
felt from a young age that I washere for something more.
(16:11):
But I could never really painta picture of what that was or
what that felt like or what thatlooked like.
So when I started to do thosepractices regular yoga, regular
meditation, regular, like I said, connection to myself it kind
of just started to unfold.
I would say that I reallyreally felt that call when the
(16:32):
pandemic hit.
So I actually did my 200 houryoga teacher training the three
weeks before they shut all ofNew York and everything down.
So this was like 6am to 9pmevery single day intensity and,
of course, if you're doing yoga,meditation and breath work
every day for three weeks,you're probably going to have a
(16:53):
spiritual awakening or someweird things are going to start
happening to you, and that'spretty much what started
happening to me.
I would start to get a lot ofvisions.
I would just start to seethings in different lenses, so
to speak, and that was when Istarted to really feel that call
.
We were in complete lockdownmode.
I was living at the yoga ashram.
(17:14):
There was maybe only 50 otherpeople there, and when there's
only 50 people there, you'reseeing the same people every
single day.
I started to really just wantto help and want to show people
that there is another way.
I really felt like of course, alot of people experienced a lot
of mental health issues or maybethe first time actually having
(17:37):
to sit with themselves, and Ifound that the practices that I
had been doing had really put mymindset in a different state,
as well as knowing that when westart to come into more peace
and calm in the body, we canautomatically enter into more
spaces like joy or feeling morelight, and I knew that that
(17:59):
avenue for me and probably a lotof other people, was just
starting to do these practices.
So, little by little, I startedto show up online and start to
share and then, maybe I want tosay a year after the pandemic, I
left and I had this wholelittle business plan and that's
where Heal From the Inside Out,this whole idea, came to life
(18:23):
and, yeah, it's been a beautifuljourney since then.
Speaker 1 (18:27):
I love that.
Speaker 2 (18:29):
So you work with women only or primarily.
Speaker 3 (18:36):
Primarily women.
I have worked with men in thepast, but I've felt this deeper
call to continue to help womenspecifically, probably like you
have the call to help men, too,as well.
Speaker 2 (18:49):
Yeah Well, for me it's a byproduct of being a
member of a men's communityfirst and then growing within
that community to start servingother men, so I don't know that
I would ultimately limit myselfto men only.
It's just where I've learnedand the language that I speak,
obviously, and where I can bringthe most value at the moment.
(19:13):
So when a woman is likestarting from zero, let's say
and zero in the sense that theydon't have a background in doing
work like this, they don't havean understanding of what it
looks like, how do you sort ofpaint the picture of what this
(19:33):
experience of working with youmight be?
Speaker 3 (19:36):
So it really depends where the woman is coming from,
because with the broad spectrumof women, this could be someone
who is maybe 50 or 60 years old.
She's lived her whole life andshe just doesn't feel fulfilled
and maybe she's going throughthat midlife crisis where she's
waking up, or maybe the woman isearlier in her mid-20s, 30s.
(20:02):
Once again, that feeling ofthis isn't working.
There's something more for me,I think, where I really meet a
lot of women is in that space ofstarting to question, because
when we're so rigid in our oneway of thinking or how we
thought our whole lives, how ourparents have thought, the
values or the systems instilledupon us, it's hard to break out
(20:25):
of that, unless you are alreadystarting to do some of that
initial work or just starting tobecome curious and wonder
what's going on here.
There is something more outthere for me, and I don't know
who or what to do.
That's usually where I meet alot of women.
(20:46):
The other place is, I feel thata lot of women are constantly
and I know this is where I wasmyself in our minds, so, like
when we're completely in ourminds, we're completely in our
logical, analytical thinking,maybe in our masculine, so to
speak.
A lot of the times, we forgetabout what makes us unique as a
(21:08):
female-bodied woman, which isgonna be everything that's
happening from the neck down ouractual physical body.
So that could be starting toget a sense.
This is what I love to work onwomen with get a sense of
starting to understand yourbody's natural signals, your
body's natural cues, especiallywhen it comes to intuition.
(21:30):
So like, yes, we all haveintuition, but how many times do
we actually cut ourselves offfrom it because of stress or
because of trauma, or because wedon't have a sense of trust for
ourselves?
So, beginning to allow women tofeel again, and that's where we
start to add those practiceswhen it comes to breathwork,
(21:51):
when it comes to even justmindfulness, mindfulness when it
comes to the body that's whenwe can get into those deeper
layers, because I feel like thebody of course there's that book
the Body Keeps the Score.
That's really where a lot ofthose hidden answers are gonna
be.
Speaker 1 (22:09):
So let's talk a little bit more about women who
are not in touch with theirintuition, because I think it's
a product of environment and,like you said, trauma and
society, that there's a lot, of,a lot placed on our shoulders
especially.
I mean I can speak for myselfas a.
I'm a mom, I'm a business ownerand I feel like I always feel
(22:31):
like I have a lot on myshoulders.
I'm also like in the public andsometimes you let people
outside voices kind of influencehow you feel about certain
situations, how you feel aboutyourself, and I feel like
intuition is like a muscle thatneeds to be practiced and the
less you use it, the less intouch you are with it.
So can you like dive into thata little bit more?
Speaker 3 (22:54):
Yeah, yeah, I love that.
So I like to do little games,so to speak, and they can be so
simple.
You can do these games withyourself to begin to develop
this muscle, like you're saying,for example, you might have a
day off and this is your daywhere you might spend it.
(23:15):
This is an example, becauseI've definitely done this before
.
Maybe you spend it Netflix andchilling.
You spend it binge watching aseries.
Instead, what if you allowedyourself that space and allowed
yourself that day to go outsideand then lead with what starts
to light you up where your bodystarts to want to go?
So this would be an experimentof okay, you walk outside, your
(23:39):
mind maybe starts to go to themaybe not so good habits that
you have.
Oh, I'm gonna get a croissant,or I'm gonna not saying a
croissant is bad, but you knowwhat I mean.
Yeah, whatever the happens, itcould be worse than a croissant.
Speaker 2 (23:52):
Yeah, my drug dealer's right down the street,
yeah yeah, yeah yeah, yeah.
Speaker 3 (23:59):
But instead it's like , okay, I'm going outside in
this moment, okay, what does mybody start to want to do?
What feels expansive in my bodyright now?
Does it feel expansive for meto go right or to go left?
Do I usually always go rightbecause that's the way to the
park, or do I really wanna trysomething different today and it
(24:20):
feels a little bit moreexciting?
Or as if it feels like yourbody is expanding to go left and
then from there continuing toallow your body to be the
mechanism of what allows you tofeel that expansion.
And then from that space ofexpansion, that's where you also
feel that joy.
So it's maybe inviting inthings that feel a little more
(24:43):
playful for you that day.
I think so many women cut offintuition because they also cut
off the inner child that wantsto be in their joy, wants to
play, wants to do a sillyintuitive dance or to sing or to
scream.
So how can we start to invitein that sense of expansion and
(25:12):
playfulness and from that,that's where the intuition
starts to light up a little bitmore.
So, taking that day off anddoing something fun.
Speaker 1 (25:22):
No, I love that idea.
Now let's expand a little biton inner child.
So if somebody is just likelistening to this, doesn't know
all this jargon, that we knowwhat is the inner child Like,
can you get into that a littlebit more?
Yeah?
Speaker 3 (25:36):
so I've how I've personally connected to the
inner child is in so manydifferent levels of the child
itself.
For me personally, I don'tremember a lot of my childhood,
so maybe some other people areon that boat where they
experienced a lot of trauma orthey disassociated and they
literally left their body formaybe a lot of traumatic events.
(25:58):
Connecting to the inner childmight be a little challenging.
How I usually see it is youusually remember things in like
seven year increments, Cause Iin seven years.
I know that, like the brainrewires itself, a lot of
different things happen in thespan of seven years.
Speaker 2 (26:17):
Maybe Tony can expand a little bit All of your cells
in your entire body outside ofthe central nervous system,
because your central nervoussystem doesn't regenerate
cellular growth, which is why alot of people in the field that
you're in and we work in believethat trauma is stored in the
central nervous system.
But every other cell in yourbody will replace itself over
the course of seven years, notin seven year rotations, but
(26:39):
every seven years.
You will have new cellulargrowth in each part of your body
.
They all move at a differentpace, but yeah.
Speaker 3 (26:46):
Beautiful.
So for me, because of that, Iguess I remember things in seven
year increments, so to speak.
So I remember this part of methat was seven years old and she
maybe this was before she wasmore tainted, she was more
playful, more silly.
I have this really funny memoryof myself running.
(27:08):
I was completely naked.
I ran outside in my backyardand I'm just running around and
like feeling so free, feeling soopen.
So for me that's a beautifulmemory of myself when I'm seven
years old.
Then I think back to 14, okay,I was a teenager.
I remember feeling so secludedand like I was so scared of what
(27:30):
other people thought of me.
I was so shut down for myself,shut down for my emotions.
So of course, that memory isone oh, we wanna revisit that
because there's something there,there's some belief system work
to do there, and then fromthere it's like okay, we're
moving on to 21.
In college, what was thatversion of you?
So there's so many differentareas, I think, of the inner
(27:51):
child that we can revisit.
But a great way to start tounlock some of these memories is
to move into a meditationspecifically for it.
So this would essentially besomeone, either me or someone on
the internet even, you couldtype in inner child healing and,
of course, do this when you'rein a safe space, maybe even
(28:13):
finding a therapist to do thiswork with too as well.
This would be really starting todive into in a systematic way
what is a version of you thatyou connect to, where it felt
off for you, where you maybe hada very challenging childhood or
challenging experience, andthen from there, that's when we
(28:36):
can start to see okay, well,what needs to be healed here,
what are some of the beliefsthat were instilled upon you
because of that experience, andfrom there then you could start
to invite in the healingcomponents, which would be, like
I said, inviting in maybe someof the play that comes with it,
inviting in some of the feminineaspects, like the dance, the
(28:58):
vocal toning, all of that stuffto help move that out of the
system and then to also gain adeeper sense of awareness and
perspective when it comes tothat version of you.
The other thing, last but notleast, is I always recommend any
of the clients that I have tohave a photo of yourself at that
(29:18):
age that feels tender for you.
So maybe it's that seven yearold version of yourself, or
younger, you have on your iPhoneor you have in front of your
mirror and just giving reverenceto that version of you every
day, giving her the tender loveand affection and maybe just
even witnessing yourself sayingI love you, I love all aspects
(29:41):
of you in the mirror.
All really, really healing inour child practices.
Speaker 1 (29:47):
Yeah, I remember the first few times I did like inner
child meditations.
Like the first one was like thisis really weird.
And then the second time I waslike, okay, I'm gonna try to
like lean into this and I thinkthe meditation that I had it was
like me as an adult like nowbasically meeting my younger
self, like at a park orsomething like that and giving
(30:11):
my younger self a hug, and itwas like and I just started
crying it was so like beautifuland intense and like it was like
the first time I met like myinner kid and it was just like
my first time getting in touchwith that side of me and it's
like very powerful and I thinkthat's a really good starting
point for people is to just getin touch with that younger part
(30:34):
of yourself and see where theyare and like what their needs
are and what's missing for them,what maybe things that were
missing from your childhood andgiving them that love that you
felt was like missing.
It's really hardcore, but it'samazing Like 15 minutes and it
could do so much for yourself-esteem.
(30:57):
I feel like.
Speaker 2 (30:58):
I mean.
And then the next level, for itis like, once you have access
to it and you start to get intouch with that inner child,
then you can give yourselfpermission to take that version
of you into every part of yourday.
You can take that because, likeyou were saying, the inner
child has access unfetteredaccess to joy, unfettered access
(31:21):
to gratitude, unfettered accessto play, because they are not
bound by the traumas that we are, they're not bound by the rules
of being an adult, being a mom,being a person with a job and
responsibilities.
But if you can bring that partof you with you into the rest of
your day, it'll allow you tohave the access to any access to
(31:41):
joy and gratitude, even withinthe rules that we play by and
the responsibilities that wehold now as adults.
Speaker 3 (31:48):
Yes, 100%.
And one thing that's coming tomind, as you're saying that,
we're still in the new year andI, this past weekend, did my
vision board.
I think that a vision board andI mean like the grab newspapers
not newspapers but magazines,actually, if you can find them,
maybe you have a group offriends that can come together,
(32:09):
bring their old magazines, andhaving that space to be like an
inner child play date is sohealing, how I recommend.
Speaker 1 (32:20):
We love it.
Speaker 2 (32:21):
We do that.
Speaker 1 (32:22):
Yeah, we do that.
It's so much fun.
It's hard to find magazinesthese days.
Speaker 2 (32:26):
We did struggle with the magazine part of the process
but we ultimately we printedand clipped whatever we couldn't
source through magazines.
But magazines were harder tofind than we thought.
Speaker 3 (32:37):
So true.
And then it gets very expensivereally quick If you do find the
magazines.
Speaker 1 (32:43):
Yes, that is true, yeah but vision boarding is a
lot of fun because you can justbe creative with it and just let
your dreams run wild and it's areally fun kind of a fun
feeling too.
Yeah.
Speaker 3 (32:55):
And then, if you wanna add that intuition
component, like you were talkingabout, it's like can I bring it
back down and into my body?
When I see an image, does thatlight up every single cell of my
body, that's gonna be the thingyou wanna clip out.
If it's something that's like,ooh, no, don't want, that
doesn't feel good, and it'salmost like this is when we
(33:16):
start to listen somatically toour body.
Oh, it starts to make me wannapush away or my shoulders hunch
down and back.
That's when you wanna continuemoving on.
It's like, oh, that's not forme at this time.
Can I make this board?
That thing that makes me wannastand in like power pose, with
the arms open, the chest open,and just every time you look at
(33:38):
it it's like that sensation ofjoy.
Speaker 1 (33:42):
And tell me a little bit more how important for women
specifically being in touchwith their intuition is when it
comes to setting boundaries andit really like loving yourself
fully.
Because I feel like womenespecially, we tend to be people
pleasers.
We tend to be uncomfortablewith our anger, we tend to be
(34:05):
uncomfortable saying no.
We wanna please everybody, wewanna say yeah.
I know that this is an issuefor a lot of women and has been
an issue for me until I did thework and that I was able to get
to a place where I could say noor I could set boundaries for
myself or I could tell people myneeds, like even attracting a
healthy relationship, being ableto say to Tony, like these are
(34:27):
the things that I need in arelationship or in that sort of
thing.
So can we dive into that alittle bit?
Speaker 3 (34:34):
Yeah, so for myself, I noticed that when I really
needed to express myself, butfor I would say, for my whole
life, my throat was very, veryblocked off, but I would
viscerally feel the sensationsin my neck Like and I think
we've all had that experiencewhen you're like I need to say
(34:55):
something, it's right there, Ifeel it and it's like you're
holding back and you could feelyourself holding back.
So for women, when you cancontinue to come back into that
body and actually notice thosesensations, you'll begin to
notice, in moments where you areholding yourself back, where
(35:16):
you aren't expressing that no oryou aren't expressing that yes,
how many times we actuallydon't say yes to the things we
really desire and really want.
So a big thing here for settingboundaries is going to be
continuing to, like I said, comeback into the body and then use
(35:39):
it as that resource or thatsensation of knowing when it's
starting, you're starting to shyaway or hide back from
expressing.
And I know that the breath, ofcourse, bringing it back to the
breath is a big tool for beingable to finally express those
boundaries in a healthy way.
(36:00):
When we get outside of ourlogical thinking mind, we get
into the body and into thebreath.
Whatever you're not processingregularly or whatever is stored
in the body actually starts tocome out.
So I've noticed that when Ihave private clients for
emotional release breath workwhich is a different style than
(36:23):
regular calming, groundingbreath that you would do when
you have anxiety or stress whenyou do this technique you'll
start to notice.
I noticed the women that arereally holding back or playing
small.
Their jaw is so clenched andtheir mouth starts to get really
small like an O, and then ifyou have clenching intention
(36:45):
here, you know you have it inthe hips too.
So what are the hips?
The hips are also connected toour boundaries.
So there is this deepconnection when it comes to a
woman's womb, our boundarycenter, and then also when it
comes to your form of expression.
So when I noticed thathappening in the body, it's like
you wanna let out the biggestscream, the biggest yell, and
(37:06):
you know, through allowingyourself to just hear your own
voice shouting no or justscreaming and letting it all out
, that through that first off,there's usually always sadness
behind it, because there's apart of you that's maybe not
listening to, that inner childthat wants to say no, wants to
(37:27):
be in their power and theirtruth, but then you're also
getting to a point where it'sreleasing, and then those blocks
or that limitation isn't asintense the next time you have
an experience where you want tosay no and allow it to come
through.
Another thing that's been reallyhealing is that I lead a lot of
women circles and there are somany different practices you can
(37:50):
do just through an embodieddance that can be how are you
expressing your no, like?
What does it feel like to justpush away with your hands and to
like, do like a culley breathwith your tongue out, screaming
like no, and then also to haveother women witnessing you
(38:11):
saying that and being in yourboundary truth?
And then also, what does itlook like for a yes and to
actually feel desire or pleasurein your body?
Okay, then you can experienceand express that through your
own body, because that looksdifferent for each and every
person, but through the act ofdoing it and working with your
(38:34):
own system.
That is really what allows youto shift each and every new
expression that you have when itcomes to your boundaries.
Speaker 1 (38:47):
Beautiful.
Very cool, tony, you seem likeyou're in thought.
Speaker 2 (38:54):
No, it's all very much.
Yeah, you are doing the femaleversion of what I do with men,
essentially in terms of thebreath work and the expression
through it.
We probably use differentsystems of breath work, but very
much in line with it, because Idid have a question and I was
(39:16):
stalling until it came into mybrain and then it popped in.
Yeah, so you talked multipletimes about being lit up and
what it feels like in theexpansion, like even cellular,
like what it feels like to bemaking the right decision and
sort of based on the knowing andyour body's telling you this is
(39:38):
the way you should go.
How do you and you sort oftouched on it a little bit how
do you bring that idea to lifefor somebody who's going?
I've never been lit up in theway that you're describing I
don't know what, that this is aforeign language.
You're essentially asking themto tap into something that
they've never experienced.
(39:58):
How do you bring them from notunderstanding that to get to the
point where they're like, oh,that's it, I get it.
Speaker 3 (40:06):
Yeah.
So it kind of goes back to theinner child a little bit.
But your inner child knew howto play.
It knew the things that wereactually fun for you, that were
joyful for you.
Maybe we have very analyticalthinkers and maybe what was
joyous for them as a kid wasplaying with puzzles and problem
(40:28):
solving and maybe writing.
Or maybe for other people thatfeel a little more creative, it
was being outside, being innature.
Nature is an amazing place thatcan bring so much joy if you
allow it to or being creativeand just taking space to paint.
(40:49):
And I think the big overarchingthing here, when it comes to
starting to create a life thatis more joyous, is that you have
to continue to make the thingsthat maybe you didn't deem
important in the past asimportant and as purposeful just
of the state of doing it.
(41:09):
So, for example, when it comesto doing artwork, maybe you have
in your mind, oh, I don't wantto do this artwork, this is
stupid, there's no reason for meto do this right now.
I'm not an artist.
And then we start to paint ouridentity around it.
It's like that's not the reasonyou're doing it.
(41:30):
You're doing it for the fact ofthis, maybe just playing with
color in this moment is bringingyou joy.
It's not going to be the nextvan Gogh, but the point is to
begin to invite more of that inand a really, really great
practice for all of my cerebralpeople out there.
I'm very cerebral myself, so Iget it is going to be journaling
(41:54):
.
So what that would look like isliterally and this is actually
a practice I started doingduring my spiritual awakening
where I would essentially letwhatever needed to come through
to come through with no purposeat all.
So it could look like grabbingyour journal in the morning and
just starting to write outwhatever comes to mind.
So it could be right away youstarting to write out all the
(42:17):
things of oh, this is my to do,this is what I have to get done
today, xyz.
But then you reach a point whereit's like, oh, that's all done,
don't have to do that anymore.
So then can you see what allowsto come through you in that
moment when all of theessentials, the things that make
you feel safe, have to bewritten out and done, what comes
(42:37):
through after that?
And that's where you start toconnect into that deeper sense
of your inner core, your innerbeing.
And then I think the soulstarts to speak a little bit
more.
And the soul wants you to be inyour joy.
It wants you to be living thatlife that feels really free for
you, whatever that means for you.
Speaker 1 (42:57):
Are you ever in a bad mood?
Speaker 3 (43:01):
Yeah, so I think what's really changed for me is
having the practices to helpmyself.
Speaker 1 (43:12):
So when I am, I'm what do you do?
What do you do when you're likespiraling, like if you, you
know we all have our moments, nomatter how spiritual, and you
know we have the tools.
But what do you do when you'rejust like I fuck all this, yeah.
Speaker 3 (43:27):
So it's funny.
I did a silent meditationretreat at Karpalu.
It's in the Berkshires Greatplace, and one of the practices
that they had us do was towardsthe end of the retreat, when we
were all feeling really, reallygood and accomplished.
They had us write a letter toourselves to read when we feel
(43:47):
like complete shit, when it'sjust like you're at the end of
you know whatever, and you knowit's just one of those days.
So it could be writing yourselflike a future letter and being
like I'm going to read this whenI need it the most and it's
going to remind me, like what abadass person you are and that
you can do it and you just needrest and like can you allow
(44:09):
yourself to have rest?
It's as simple as that.
Or it's leaning on my practices,like every single day I have to
do breath work.
It's like breath translates tospirit literally and it helps me
one first off, just feelregulated in my nervous system
(44:30):
and then also just helps me feelmore connected, more connected
to myself and then moreconnected to the universe.
Breathwork, meditation, andthen you can't go wrong with
yoga Anytime you're like I don'twant to get up, I don't want to
go on my mat.
I don't want to go to yogapractice.
I promise you, if you just makethat initial step of opening up
(44:50):
your yoga mat or booking aclass and walking to the class,
you will stop spiraling afterthat yoga class.
Something about actually doingand using the breath and using
your body as that vehicle to getyou out out of your own way,
out of your head, is really whatshifts it.
Speaker 1 (45:13):
Can you walk us through your daily morning
routine and night routine, yourdaily practices?
What does that look like foryou?
What time do you wake up andwhat do you eat?
What do you drink?
All that stuff?
Speaker 3 (45:24):
Sure, I love it.
So I don't even want to tellyou guys, because I know you
guys are amazing with yourmorning practices.
No, not always.
Speaker 1 (45:34):
Listen, listen.
No, we're not.
This is not always, of coursenot always.
Speaker 3 (45:39):
I spab every morning.
Speaker 2 (45:42):
Also not every morning, that's like four to
five times a week.
But it's funny becauseeverybody all the people that
are living a life of somepurpose, some drive and ambition
and wellness we all wannacompare notes on the morning
(46:02):
rituals and the nightly rituals.
We all wanna compare notes andsee what everybody else is doing
and it's easy to forget that itis so much more important just
to have some and to have some ofthat structure in place than
what it literally is right, like, so like our morning rituals
could be different than the nextsuccessfully living person's
(46:24):
rituals.
But the theme is that everybodyhas something that they fall on
or they start their day withand then they go to bed with.
But it's funny.
Speaker 1 (46:34):
It's interesting because people think that we
have our morning routine dialedin but we don't.
Like we have a kid and someweeks we're like on point and
we're working out and we'remeditating and we're doing the
cold plunge and we're having agreen smoothie and all that
stuff and then some mornings.
It's a fucking shit show, youknow what I mean, and like we're
lucky to get like one thing inand that's just the way it is,
(46:57):
but like we keep going back toour practices.
Speaker 2 (47:00):
But the differences for everyone that's listening is
that we ultimately gotourselves to a place where, if
there's a day that gets likejust completely ran over by
chaos and unpredictability, wecan flip the switch back the
next day.
It's not like we have to startfrom zero and rebuild, Like we
have it in our pockets, Like allright back to the playbook.
(47:20):
We're good.
But it's the people that likeare building something and
building the sacred dailyrituals that, if you're not in a
place of like this is secondnature to me and then something
comes by and derails you.
Speaker 1 (47:33):
Now you're reset to zero and you know it's not
everybody needs to do a morningritual necessarily.
Like maybe you're more of likea midday ritual person or a
nighttime right?
So like tell us what a typicalday yeah it is for you.
Speaker 3 (47:47):
So I usually every day is a little different based
on my schedule, but I do try towake up by seven and when I wake
up, sometimes I check my phoneand if you're listening to this
and you check your phone, it'sokay.
While I would love to say thatyou know, every morning I get up
my phone's away from my bed andyou know it's this beautiful,
(48:10):
glorious thing.
Yeah, sometimes I use it as away to get up.
So I get up.
I try to get sunlight on myface first thing in the morning,
so usually by the time I'mopening the blinds, there is sun
beaming, of course, if it's notraining or snowing or anything
like that spend just a couple ofminutes there feeling the sun
(48:32):
on my face.
I try to take a few breathsjust to feel grounded in that
moment, and then from there, youknow, after the brushing teeth
and all of that stuff, I go intothe kitchen.
I do infuse things that I'velearned from Arruveta over the
years.
So something really amazing todo is to drink warm water with
(48:56):
lemon.
If you want to make it extra,you can add honey, because it
has this scraping quality to thebody, so it starts to release
toxins.
Okay, we need to add honey.
Speaker 2 (49:05):
Add some honey nurse.
Speaker 1 (49:06):
Yeah, I do Okay.
Speaker 3 (49:09):
And then from there I have a morning coffee and I
start to make the morningsmoothie.
Usually I always add for awhile I was doing the medical
medium, his detox smoothie.
Now I kind of yeah, yeah, yeah.
So I was doing that for yearsactually.
And then now I've kind of comeup with my own little
(49:30):
combination I have it's like a.
It's cleansing greens for theliver.
It's a powder from Anna MamundiHerbal's so I put that in my
smoothie, usually have spinach,banana, wild blueberries, add
orange juice or some oat milk toit, blend it all up.
(49:51):
Usually that's my firstbreakfast of the morning.
I don't have more breakfastthan that, but that's my
breakfast of the morning.
Speaker 2 (49:59):
And then and middle day breakfast.
Speaker 3 (50:02):
Yeah, yeah, yeah, right, I try to only have three
meals a day From there.
I usually try to, of course.
I make the bed and then I gointo my office, which I have a
little altar off to the sidethat I usually try to hide and
that is what has, you know, allof my little spiritual goodies
(50:23):
on it and I try to meditate inthat space.
What I love to do is actuallyspend a little bit more time
doing breath than the actualmeditation.
So what that looks like is, ifI have 30 minutes, it would be
20 minutes of breath work andthen 10 minutes of meditation.
So my breath practices change.
(50:45):
And if you're a female bodilyowner, then I recommend to not
do intense breath work practiceswhen you're actually on your
menstrual cycle.
So when I'm on my menstrualcycle, my breath techniques are
more calming to the body, moredownward focusing.
So you know that would meanextension of the exhale versus
(51:08):
the inhale, getting more oxygenor air on the exhale versus the
inhale.
But usually when I am not on mycycle I do more upward focusing
breath practices.
So that could mean breath offire.
That could mean moreintensifying and oxygenating and
(51:31):
detoxifying breath practices.
Kundalini yoga breath practices, if you had to research a term.
And then when I start to sinkinto that, my mind and my body
are already prepped formeditation.
So then usually I'll do a 10minute meditation.
(51:51):
After that breath I like to pulla card lately for the day.
So I've been pulling an Oraclecard deck.
I have this Rose Oracle deck byRebecca Campbell that I love.
If you wanna just look her upas a person, she's amazing,
rebecca Campbell.
And then from there usuallythat's my morning.
(52:13):
I like to exercise in themorning if I get the chance, but
if I don't, then I'll exerciseat night.
Try to get movement in at leastonce a day, yes, and then
throughout the day variousthings, whether that be a
one-on-one coaching sessionSometimes I do a lot of
(52:34):
corporate wellness calls, so Ihave those stacked up a lot of
the days and then at night.
Nighttime is like my favoritefavorite thing to really really
start to calm the body down.
I love to have tea at night, solike a very cleansing herbal
tea.
I love yeah, lynn does it Same.
(52:59):
If you're a Trader Joe's fan, Ilove to get the sleepy time tea
I think it's called somethinglike that and the chamomile in
combination with other herbsalready prepare your body for
bedtime.
I try to limit phone use, ofcourse, at night, and then when
(53:20):
I actually step into the bedroom, first thing I do is I turn off
all the lights and I put acandle on.
Just already starting to switchthe environment from daytime to
nighttime with the candlereally just relaxes my nervous
system.
I then what I really really loveto do and I honestly recommend
(53:41):
this to all my clients is tohave a practice of releasing
anything that you came incontact with during the day.
So you can call this prayer,you can call this cord cutting,
whatever you wanna call it.
It's like can you take for me?
I like to actually havesomething physical.
So I'll sage my room or I'llpalo santo it, and then I'll
(54:05):
just stand right beside my bedand start to say I release
anything I came in contact withtoday.
I release the cord with, andI'll name specific people that I
spend a lot of time withthroughout the day Just more of
these energetic practices toespecially being a healer, so to
(54:26):
speak, to release that from myphysical being.
And then from there I usuallyfeel sleepy after letting go of
all the other things from theday, and I start to sink into
bed with a book, and then Ialways fall asleep after the
first three pages.
(54:48):
So if you have trouble sleepingjust read a book at night,
you'll be fine.
Speaker 1 (54:53):
So Love Island before bed is probably not a good idea
.
Speaker 2 (54:57):
Hey, listen, that's our smudging.
Speaker 1 (55:00):
That's how we smudge.
Speaker 2 (55:02):
No, but I have a mentor that does exactly what
you're talking about.
He comes together with his wifeand they release all of the
stuff that they picked up fromeverybody along the day.
She does women's work, he doesmen's work, and you come in
contact and you it's not thatyou take on other people's stuff
, but you're in contact withother people's stuff like all
(55:24):
day long.
So I love the idea.
Speaker 1 (55:26):
We should start doing that.
Speaker 2 (55:27):
Yeah, I love the idea of kind of just it's not
getting rid of or anything likethat, but it's just like
releasing, just releasing anysort of things that you picked
up throughout the day, that'sone, and what I'm picking up
from all the people that we'vebeen interviewing lately, all
these wellness people, is thatwe need to start drinking
smoothies in the morning.
Speaker 1 (55:46):
I think we need to get on back on the smoothie
train On the smoothie train.
I used to really drive thesmoothie train the last three
people that we've interviewed,each and every one of said that
they have a smoothie in themorning, yeah so.
Speaker 3 (56:00):
Well, something I want to say there though.
Is.
So this comes back to.
Are you Veda?
If you're a very airy person,so this is the person that's
like, always on the go.
They're maybe have a lot ofanxious tendencies, have a lot
of thoughts, they're in theirhead a lot.
A smoothie sometimes mightactually be too much for your
(56:21):
digestive system because it'scold.
So are you Vedically speaking?
If you have Vata is what it'scalled the Doshia, then that'll
actually yeah, so you're finewith smoothies.
But if you have cold and you'relike that airy person, I don't
know what am I?
Speaker 1 (56:40):
You might feel a little more airy person.
Speaker 3 (56:42):
Well, usually your combination.
So what I do because I am aVata, I'm an airy person and a
Pitta too combo.
I add bananas and avocado to mysmoothie and I try to not have
it like.
I never add ice, I try to haveit like at room temperature.
So that's what works for me.
I can't have like raw salad andlike with like barely any
(57:08):
dressing or raw foods.
In general.
It is horrible to digest thedigestive tract.
If you are of the qualities inmy body, it's really adding more
warmth into the system.
Speaker 1 (57:23):
Do you do like a quiz online to determine like what
you are?
Sure are you?
Speaker 3 (57:29):
Vediccom.
Yeah, there are quizzes.
Speaker 1 (57:31):
Yeah, yeah, yeah, Rick, how.
So how do people find you?
Where can they follow you, andall that good stuff.
Speaker 3 (57:39):
Awesome.
So it's pretty much my firstname and my last name for
everything.
It's Raquel Ravello.
On Instagram, raquelravellocomfor my website.
Usually I post a lot of what Ihave coming up on Instagram and
my website's under constructionright now so you won't get the
(57:59):
most up to date stuff, but it'salways nice to take a peek.
If you feel called, always justshoot me a DM or you could send
me an email at hello atRaquelRavellocom, and I'm always
happy to dive in deeper there.
Speaker 1 (58:14):
Well, thank you so much for having us.
Speaker 2 (58:18):
Yeah, for having us Sorry.
Thank you for sharing thisspace with us today.
Speaker 1 (58:25):
That's the right thing to say.
Speaker 2 (58:27):
No, it was an awesome , awesome conversation.
Yeah, we loved it.
Speaker 1 (58:30):
Yeah, thanks again, thank you guys, and we'll
definitely talk soon.
Bye.
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