October 7, 2024 • 47 mins
What if confronting trauma could lead to greater resilience? This episode commemorates the one-year anniversary of the Hamas attacks on Israel, a day etched in memory for its heartbreak and chaos. We recount the personal stories of survivors and those affected by the ongoing violence, including the recent missile attack from Iran. Through these narratives, we grapple with the emotional aftermath and the public's challenging responses, while urging listeners to critically evaluate the sources of their information amidst a polarized media landscape.
Join us as we navigate the intricate web of the Israeli-Palestinian conflict from a deeply personal perspective. Growing up in Israel and engaging with Palestinian peers, we have faced backlash and threats for vocalizing support for Israel's right to exist. This episode tackles the misconceptions surrounding the conflict, emphasizing that it's against organizations, not individuals. We highlight the importance of fostering a nuanced understanding of the Middle Eastern political landscape, and the personal toll of advocating for peace in a world riddled with misinformation.
Reflecting on Jewish identity and the resilience required to thrive amid adversity, we delve into the complexities of navigating trauma and trust issues. The constant uncertainty has altered relationships and perspectives, making self-reliance and routine critical anchors. Despite the challenges, there is a hopeful belief in the wisdom gained, and a readiness to embrace a redefined sense of normalcy. As we look towards the future, we aim to balance serious themes with lighter content, maintaining authenticity while offering hope and resilience as we face whatever comes next.
Your hosts: @lynnhazan_ and @tonydoesknow
follow us on social @ltkpod!
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Transcript
Episode Transcript
Available transcripts are automatically generated. Complete accuracy is not guaranteed.
Speaker 1 (00:07):
okay, um, welcome back.
This is being released onoctober 7th, 2024, so it has
been, as of today, a year sincethe horrific attacks on Israel
from Hamas that saw the murderof several thousand Jewish
(00:36):
people stolen from their homes,stolen from the music festival
and, more than likely, unlessthings change in the coming days
, there are still over 100innocent men, women and small
children still being heldcaptive in Gaza right now.
(00:56):
We wanted to release somethingthat sort of honored the
one-year mark, something wecertainly hoped we would never
have to do, but we are, and it'sbeen the longest year, but also
(01:20):
still feels like yesterday thatwe woke up on a Saturday
morning to the news of theattack.
I mean, it really feels like amonth ago and 10 years ago all
at the same time, like lineartime does not apply to what the
experience has been for us, forthe community, for us, for the
(01:43):
community.
So with that, uh, I don't knowexactly where this will go, um,
but we're going to give it ourbest shot and see where it takes
us.
And, um, we're also ironicallyor not ironically, we are
(02:09):
recording this on October 1st.
It's about seven hours afterIran launched 180 ballistic
missiles at the state of Israel,many of which landed in some
versions, some were shrapnellanded, some actually hit
directly into Israel.
(02:30):
Thank God no Israelis werekilled in the attack, although
there was a terrorist attacksimultaneously that seems to be
it's hard to say if it wascoordinated or not but did take
the lives of six innocentIsraelis.
And then there was aPalestinian in Jericho that was
(02:51):
killed by the shrapnel of one ofthe IRGC's missiles.
So a very heavy day that iscommemorating a very heavy year.
It was a very intense two hoursto see and to know, in this
case, unlike in April when Iranlaunched their barrage of
(03:14):
rockets.
Those were different, becausethose were drones, those were
cruise missiles, they were notballistic missiles that can
cover the ground between Tehranand Israel in 12 minutes.
The other ones in April, takemuch longer.
You have much more heads up andthey're easier to deal with.
Regardless, either one is anact of war, essentially against
(03:40):
the state of Israel, and thisone will likely prove, by the
time we release this podcast, tobe an escalation that Israel
will respond to in a verypowerful way.
And who knows where we'll be inthe next five days.
But here we are a year later,nonetheless still dealing with
(04:01):
the day-to-day violence, war,trauma, anxiety, intensity that
has not given much room forlight or real hope to see the
light at the end of the tunnelat all, aside from a few moments
of joy where either the hostagewas released, some were rescued
(04:23):
.
Beyond that, the joyous momentsfrom this are few and far
between.
Speaker 2 (04:30):
Yeah, well, very well said, I think, a lot about the
night before.
It was Friday night and it'sinteresting because we weren't
doing Shabbat like prettyregularly.
But that night we had Shabbatdinner and we had some friends
over and I decided to make likean Israeli meal.
(04:53):
I don't know, I just decidedlike I wanted just to make
schnitzel and Israeli salad andhummus and pita and just like
have a good time with friendsand we had a really good night.
Speaker 1 (05:04):
Amazing night.
Speaker 2 (05:04):
And I remember going to sleep that night like just
feeling good, and then Saturdaymorning I think, you got out of
bed.
You went.
Noah woke up.
Speaker 1 (05:17):
Yeah.
Speaker 2 (05:17):
And I looked on my phone.
I had hundreds of missedmessages and calls and I didn't
know it was.
I couldn't, you know, catch mybearing and but I saw one
message and I don't know why,but it stood out to me and it
was a message of my group chat.
Girls that I grew up with whenI lived in Israel were on a
group chat and one of them senta message like sending you all
(05:41):
hugs.
And I don't know why, butthat's when I knew that
something awful happened.
I don't know why.
It was just like, like, justsent, seeing that message,
sending you all hugs, hopeeveryone's okay.
My, I like I remember my heartsinking.
And that's when I opened thenew, you know the news and saw
(06:03):
everything that was going on andI couldn't believe it.
I couldn't believe it and no,right away, called my parent, my
parents they were in Israel atthe time called my sister Um,
couldn't reach my sister,messaging Like it, just like
it's so much going on.
You know, you, I have so manypeople that I love in Israel and
it's just like and I'm tryingto figure it out Like what was
(06:27):
going on, like I saw, I rememberI saw one video of Hamas
terrorists, like shooting atpeople in the street and people
being taken hostage.
It was like a barrage ofhorrible images as I opened my
eyes on a Saturday morning andthen we saw like images from
Nova and I was like Lee, myniece.
(06:48):
She's 26 years old and sheloves to go party and she loves
to go to raves and, and rightaway I Lee's okay, you know.
But then she said, you know, alot of her friends are missing
and it was just all this stuffgoing on and it was so
overwhelming and it just feelslike since that morning, every
(07:15):
single morning, I wake up and Iexperience it again in some form
or way.
I experience trauma everysingle day and I'm expecting bad
news every single day.
And the worst part of of thatfirst day was when I was kind of
(07:36):
re-reporting what was going onin the news.
Right away, in my messages, inmy DMs, people were saying that
Israel is committing genocideand saying all these things
about Israel and all that,basically that we had it coming,
that we deserve, basically thatwe deserve this, or what about?
People were what abouting?
What about Palestinians?
(08:02):
And I obviously didn't have thetime and the energy and space
to respond to these people Ijust like blocked right away.
But I couldn't believe thatmost of the messages that I was
getting from people was that washate and very little messages
asking me if my family is okay.
There were, and of course,there were, a ton of people that
reached out to ask me if myparents were okay, if my sister
(08:23):
was okay, and I'm very thankfulfor those people, but I'm, I was
horrified at the amount ofpeople that reached out to ask
me if my parents were okay, ifmy sister was okay, and I'm very
thankful for those people, butI'm, I was horrified at the
amount of people who, while myniece was still searching for
her friends, while we werefiguring out that everybody was
safe, while attacks were stillgoing on, at this point, people
(08:43):
were what abouting, were whatabouting and and repeating all
this Hamas propaganda, and Icouldn't believe it and it was
heartbreaking.
And then I and then started, andthen it was just, you know, the
next, the first two months of,uh, from October to December.
(09:06):
I don't even remember.
It's almost where I was likehere, but I was.
I was a shell of myself.
Yeah, the amount of of trauma,and you know it's it's, it's
like seeing the Holocaust liveon social media.
You know it's like seeing theHolocaust live on social media
and then seeing the world notgive a fuck about you, not give
(09:29):
a fuck about the hostages.
Or worse, yeah, and then thislast year and it's like and I
say this all the time I livelike a parallel, I live parallel
lives, like I have this part ofme that's in constant grief and
trauma and just horror, likejust constant.
(09:52):
And then there's the other sideof me that's with Noah and
going to the park and looking upat the sun and looking at
nature and making love with myhusband and the beauty of life
right, but deep down there'sthis trauma and guilt and shame
and every possible feeling thatyou could possibly feel, a
(10:15):
negative feeling, and it's beenheartbreaking.
It's been heartbreaking beingJewish and being Israeli and
being villainized and beingcalled a baby killer and being
called all these horrible things.
Because I'm proud to be Jewish,because I'm proud to be Israeli
(10:42):
, I don't have an Israelipassport.
I lived in Israel six years.
Others people could say you'renot Israeli, you were born in
fucking Canada.
What are you in Israel?
But I feel Israeli.
I've always felt Israeli.
I grew up in an Israeli home.
My grandparents survived theHolocaust and the only country
(11:04):
that would take them was Israel.
My, my grandparents, on myfather's side, escaped Morocco
when he was eight years old,with nothing, with only the
shirt on his back and the onlycountry that would take him was
Israel.
My father fought two wars andmy father was a musician.
He had no interest in being inthe IDF, but the IDF is at 18,
(11:28):
you are forced to serve in themilitary, and my father had to
fight in two wars and God knowswhat he saw.
So, yes, I am proud of where Icome from.
I am proud of the Jewish nation,am proud of the Jewish nation
and to see people villainize acountry that I love so much and
(11:56):
it's not perfect and I discussedthis in previous time.
I've been protesting BibiNetanyahu since I'm 13 years old
, literally, you know, I'm notnecessarily like, like I'm not
happy necessarily with mygovernment in America or like,
or I was in Canada, right, doesit mean that I'm not proud of of
being Israeli and Jewish?
(12:17):
I am very proud and I alwayswill be, and no matter how
unpopular it is and no matterhow many horrible words people
will call me, I will never,never, turn my back on my
country, ever, ever, and I wantpeace more than anybody, and
(12:38):
I've always, and this is my life, this is literally my life.
And to see Americans light thisis literally my life and to see
Americans you know with fromfucking butt, fuck nowhere or
whatever, who have no skin inthe game, who have never been to
the Middle East, who've madethe pro-Palestinian cause their
whole fucking personality, it'sso it makes me sick.
Speaker 1 (13:02):
Yeah.
Speaker 2 (13:02):
Because they don't care about Palestinian lives.
They don't care, they're justleeched themselves onto a cause
because it's trendy and popular,Dehumanizing Israelis,
dehumanizing Jews that our livesdon't matter.
I've been.
(13:25):
I just I've been called everyhorrible fucking name and like,
and it's almost like, to a pointwhere it doesn't sting anymore.
Speaker 1 (13:32):
Yeah.
Speaker 2 (13:35):
You know it doesn't sting anymore.
Speaker 1 (13:36):
Yeah.
Speaker 2 (13:44):
And sometimes I try to find the silver lining.
And the silver lining isgetting closer to my faith,
getting closer to being Jewish,it's getting closer to my family
.
Right, it's finding mycommunity in Jersey, the Jewish
community, and taking out thetrash.
(14:04):
Yeah, in Jersey, the Jewishcommunity, and taking out the
trash.
Yeah, the universe has takenout the trash.
Speaker 1 (14:12):
Yeah.
Speaker 2 (14:12):
So much trash.
Speaker 1 (14:17):
Yeah, the friend group is smaller.
There are people that I wouldnot consider myself close with
anymore, that I may haveconsidered beforehand.
And what has been the mostshocking to me, especially as
somebody who came into thisconflict, a relatively blank
(14:41):
slate, right, I didn't know that.
I was aware of the of, of thetension between the two groups.
I mean, it was literally, Ithink, the day before our first
trip to Israel when there was ashooting on Dizengoff, which is
the like the main street and oneof the main streets where
(15:04):
people hang out, the bars andstuff in Tel Aviv.
There was a shooting, aterrorist attack in Dizengov.
So it was always a thing.
And then, both times we went, wedidn't go to the old city of
Jerusalem just because tensionswere high, for whatever reason.
Well, we go during the holidaysand during the holidays.
(15:24):
The tensions seem to flare up alittle bit more.
During the holidays and duringthe holidays, the tensions seem
to flare up a little bit more.
So, going into this relativelya blank slate, what I found so
shocking with people that I knowthat, when confronted about
sharing misinformation fromsources that are that are are
wildly biased against Israel,the staunchness with which they
(15:47):
defend their ill-conceivedpositions, the rebuttals
rebuttals that you would not seein any other moment like this
in history, where if a blackperson said to you during Black
Lives Matter, during COVID, hey,what you're sharing is harmful
(16:08):
to our people, I would like youto take some consideration about
what you're sharing before youshare it, you wouldn't go.
No, I think I'm going to do itanyway, because this seems
pretty right and I think I'mmore correct than you are.
A person with lived experienceis telling me and this is not
just like a one-off thing thisis across the board with people
(16:28):
that.
I know personally, with very fewexceptions and there are
exceptions there have beenpeople that have listened, that
have taken recommendations forbooks and read them and said,
hey, thank you for letting meknow about this book.
I really appreciate it, butthat is the exception to the
rule that seems to be.
That is the exception to therule that seems to be.
I just read an article and Ihave a friend that told me X, y,
(16:51):
z and I know more than you now.
Yeah, almost across the board.
It's, it's like from people thatI've had people tell me to
educate myself.
Speaker 2 (17:01):
I grew up in this conflict right.
Not only did I live in Israel, Iwas also part of an exchange
program with Palestinianstudents.
You know I was volunteering forMeretz, which is the most
leftist political organizationin Israel.
Like as leftist and asprogressive as you can can
(17:23):
possibly possibly.
Yeah, I studied middle easthistory and my teacher was a
christian egyptian.
No bias there actually leantowards not loving israel so
much, but I learned from him andso I know this conflict and
(17:44):
seeing people in my dms who've,who I who've literally probably
got their information fromtiktok yeah but even from media.
Look how, how, how.
The new york times, obscurewashington post, like the, like
the.
Speaker 1 (18:01):
The bias is crazy they get accused of bias both
ways.
What's interesting about thoseis you literally have to go
writer by writer, Like it's notone institution leaning one way
or the other although some arefor sure but it's like there are
specific people that they allowto just write whatever trash
(18:21):
they want and just publish it.
Speaker 2 (18:24):
Right, but it, but it's.
What's crazy is that whathappened to listening and
learning right and no, and andI've tried to have constructive
conversations with people andpeople will sometimes come to me
in a respectful way and thenthey, as soon as they got my
attention, they switch on me.
You know what I'm saying andI've just it's not my job to
(18:46):
educate you.
It's not my job, like it's not,and I try to.
I think I've done a good job inthe past, like year, to try to
educate people and and sharesources that I, I, I trust, but
it, it, the villainizing has notstopped and the amount of
vitriol and hate and I, you know, I, I didn't share some of the
(19:11):
stuff that we were dealing with.
It was almost to a point whereI had to file a police report.
I've been, you know, I've beenput on a list, on a Zionist list
.
It's absurd that this is theworld we live in, it's 2024.
And me being Jewish and bebelieving in Israel's right to
exist and Israel right to defendhimself has made me a genocidal
(19:34):
baby killer.
Speaker 1 (19:36):
Yeah.
Speaker 2 (19:37):
And you know I'll post collaborations with other
businesses and I'll get the mosthorrifying comments and
thankfully, some of thesebusinesses appreciate what I do
and still respect me and respectmy views to still hire me.
Speaker 1 (19:54):
Yeah.
Speaker 2 (19:55):
And I'm thankful for those little opportunities that
I get, but it's definitelyaffected my bottom line.
It's affected my business.
I've lost thousands offollowers because I believe in
Israel's right to exist.
I'm not the Israeli government.
I don't have a direct line toBibi Netanyahu where I can call
him and be like hey, maybe youshould think about your strategy
(20:17):
a little bit differently.
I have zero Jews, and Israelishave no control over what the
government decides, have nocontrol over what the government
decides.
You know what I mean.
Nobody wanted this war,absolutely.
I'm horrified for the people ofGaza.
(20:41):
I'm horrified.
It's horrifying.
I don't want to see dead babiesand all these things.
Nobody wants to see death Like.
It's not something that I wantor any Jewish person wants.
We do not celebrate death.
We don't celebrate when peopledie.
We celebrate when terroristsdie, get killed.
Yeah, you know, I postedsomething like a week ago when
(21:06):
Nasrallah, who is a hugeterrorist.
Speaker 1 (21:09):
One of the biggest.
Speaker 2 (21:10):
One of the biggest terrorists and Israel
assassinated him and, yeah, Iwas happy about it and somebody
called me disgusting.
I'm disgusting, okay.
Speaker 1 (21:21):
Oh well.
I guess I'm disgusting.
Yeah, oh well.
And what is becoming more clear, especially in the past I don't
know, two weeks is now.
What is ultimately happening isIsrael is being backed into a
(21:42):
corner where they are literallysingle-handedly going to
recreate the Middle East,literally single-handedly going
to recreate the Middle East.
Speaker 2 (21:51):
They are taking out the trash, they are curing the
cancer of the Islamic regime andit is going to go down in
history as one of the mostsweeping reforms of the Middle
East, and I want people tounderstand you know, if you know
nothing about this conflict,Israel is not fighting against
(22:12):
the Palestinian people.
Israel is fighting Hamas.
Speaker 1 (22:15):
They're not fighting against the Lebanese people.
Israel is not fighting againstthe Lebanese people.
Speaker 2 (22:19):
They're fighting against Hezbollah.
Israel is not fighting againstthe Iranian people.
They're fighting against theIRGC.
Speaker 1 (22:27):
They're not fighting against Yemen.
They're fighting against theIRGC.
They're not fighting againstYemen, they're fighting the
Houthis.
Speaker 2 (22:30):
They're fighting radical Islamism, which nobody
wants.
All these pro-choice peoplethat follow me, the liberals,
the LGBTQ community trust mewhen I tell you you don't want
Sharia law in our country.
Speaker 1 (22:49):
Unless you want to be dead, because that's what it
boils down to.
If you want to usher in yourown execution, great go nuts.
You don't have to wait, you cango over there, yeah.
But that's not.
That's not to say that israelwants war with any of these
(23:17):
countries.
We are not invading countries,we are at war with iranian
proxies and, and the distinctionbetween iran and the irgc needs
to be made, because again, it'siran if you go back and look
what iran was before the irgctook over it was a beautiful,
beautiful, beautiful culture,beautiful country, modernized.
Speaker 2 (23:39):
Like living the life do you want to tell people how
the irgc took over Iran?
How did it happen?
Speaker 1 (23:49):
Colleges.
It started.
Speaker 2 (23:51):
It started with the left.
Speaker 1 (23:56):
It started with the left and started with academia
and propagandizing institutionsof higher learning.
I mean, this is how a lot offascism starts.
I mean, this isn't a one-off.
This is like.
This is how it starts.
This is ding ding ding dingthis is the blueprint.
I mean it is not hard to draw aline from from 40, 50 years ago
(24:16):
, young minds who aren't fullydeveloped right tell them that
their life is terrible, rightthat they need a change.
Give them a sense of community,a sense of belonging, give them
a uniform, give them theplaybook, and then let them do
the rest.
Speaker 2 (24:32):
Right, and then until it's too late.
Speaker 1 (24:35):
Right, but we've seen this movie and the adults in
the room remember seeing thismovie and aren't going to let it
play out to the end again.
And that's just the way it is.
And at this point, israel'skind of said with or without you
, we are going to do what isnecessary to put a stop to this
(24:57):
and you either get on board oryou get out of the way.
That's essentially what they'vetold the United States.
They didn't inform them of thestrike against the strike
against Nasrallah.
So no, we can't afford it yeah.
Speaker 2 (25:11):
No, it's afford yeah.
Speaker 1 (25:14):
There's always a leak in every blabber mouth and
every friend group, and we'rethe blabber mouth.
Speaker 2 (25:20):
Yeah, I agree.
I think Israel should do itsown thing at this point and and
because everybody telling uswhat to do, like we're cleaning
up the world.
Speaker 1 (25:29):
Yeah, we don't need any anchors attached to our legs
.
And look what happens.
Look at the speed andefficiency with which they
operate, now that they don'tgive a fuck what anybody thinks,
like the way that they haveeliminated Hezbollah and
crippled them in the matter ofless than a month.
Speaker 2 (25:49):
And again, all of this is as a result of attacks.
The war in Gaza is as a resultof them still holding our
hostages.
It's a result of them murdering1,200 people in the most
horrible and horrifying way,coming into our most peaceful
communities and killing the mostpeaceful of our residents.
(26:13):
That is, in itself, a show thatthey do not want peace.
There is no diplomacy withHamas.
Speaker 1 (26:21):
Nope.
Speaker 2 (26:23):
And they embed themselves in humanitarian zones
.
They shoot rockets fromhumanitarian zones.
They, you know, use their ownpeople as human shields.
And again and then the war.
And what's happening in Lebanonis as a result of 11 months of
(26:44):
nonstop rockets, 11 months.
Speaker 1 (26:48):
Something like 10,000 rockets.
Speaker 2 (26:49):
In what country in the world would withstand 11
months of nonstop rockets, rightwhen 100,000 people had to
evacuate their homes for 11months?
Speaker 1 (27:04):
Right, and what part of Lebanon is Israel occupying?
Speaker 2 (27:10):
Nothing.
Speaker 1 (27:11):
What part of Yemen is Israel occupying?
Speaker 2 (27:14):
Exactly.
So a year, a year of this, ayear of this has elapsed, and
you know, and we're labeled asthe aggressor and we're fighting
a war on seven fronts and we'rethe aggressor.
You can't even see israel onthe map.
It's this fucking small.
(27:35):
It's the size of new jersey.
It's the size of new jersey.
And we're the aggressor andwe're the colonizers.
There are are 22 Muslimcountries.
There is one Jewish nation.
We just want everybody to leaveus alone.
That's it.
(27:57):
We just want, we want to beable to live in our indigenous
homeland.
We want to live in peace.
We want to.
We want to be left alone and inreturn, we will innovate, we
will build, we will.
You know the COVID vaccine.
How much, how much innovationhas come out of this tiny
fucking country.
We will give back to the world.
(28:20):
Just leave us alone.
Speaker 1 (28:26):
Yeah, because if you don't, they'll innovate in ways
that will blow up your pagers.
Speaker 2 (28:32):
Which is crazy, and this shit makes me fucking proud
.
That whole thing with thebeepers.
How of a precise attack onhezbollah?
Yeah, and, and what?
And of course, the jew hatersare they're mad when we're
precise, right, they're mad whenwe're not precise.
(28:54):
You know what is it gonna beLike?
What's the way?
Speaker 1 (28:59):
The only way is to lay down and die.
Speaker 2 (29:01):
Yes, People love dead Jews.
Speaker 1 (29:04):
Yeah, the way is to lay down and die Love dead Jews
Right.
Speaker 2 (29:10):
Well, we're not going anywhere.
Speaker 1 (29:11):
Nope.
Speaker 2 (29:12):
We've survived everything, and the more I like
get deep into my Judaism and themore I learn about all the
holidays and the more I learnabout our history.
You just open a book ofTehillim which is Psalms right,
and it's constant stories ofsome schmuck.
Speaker 1 (29:31):
Resilience, yeah, yeah.
Speaker 2 (29:36):
You can't get rid of us.
Speaker 1 (29:37):
No.
Speaker 2 (29:38):
And it's kind of like my story as chickpea you can't
get rid of us.
No, and it's kind of like mystory as chickpea you can't get
rid of me.
You know what I mean.
Speaker 1 (29:43):
You'll leave on your own terms.
No, not a moment before.
Guess what.
If you do end up leaving here,it'll probably be to go to
Israel.
Speaker 2 (29:55):
Yeah.
Speaker 1 (29:57):
And they'll still be mad.
Yeah.
Speaker 2 (30:01):
And they'll still be mad.
And I and I think the silverlining for me in this year is
just getting to a place of beingcomfortable being hate, like
for years I struggle with peoplebeing people hating me, right.
For a whole decade I've been indoing this, right, I've been on
social media and I've beenblogging and doing my thing and
(30:23):
the haters always got to mealmost to a point where I
stopped.
I mean, I stopped writing twoyears ago, right, I stopped
doing something that I reallytruly loved because of the
bullying.
It was just.
I got burnt out from it, right.
But now, after a year, I'm kindof in a place where I'm like,
ok, they hate me because they'reanti-Semites.
(30:44):
It was never personal.
Speaker 1 (30:46):
Sure.
Speaker 2 (30:47):
It was never really personal.
They don't know me.
They just see me as a Jew, as aIsraeli and whatever tropes
come with that, that I'm agentrifier and that I'm what
else All the things that theysay right, and at the end of the
day, I know who I am.
I worked really hard to get towhere I am.
(31:08):
I still continue to work hard.
Nothing is given to me on asilver platter.
Nothing was given to my parents.
My parents worked very hard tobuild a life that they have and
I'm very inspired by them and Iwork really hard.
I wake up every morning and Ibust my ass for my clients and
for my family and for mycommunity, and I know who I am
(31:32):
and people can call me all thethings and it won't matter.
Speaker 1 (31:38):
Yeah, I sort of ripped that bandaid off just
being in a band when I was 20years old.
It got kind of popular and theneverybody tells you how shitty
your music is.
You read enough comments likethat and you get over it you
withstand pretty much anything,yeah and I'm proud.
Speaker 2 (31:53):
I'm proud to be jewish more than ever, more than
ever.
I'm proud to be part of thiscommunity and sometimes I'm like
I look at the sky and I'm likeHashem why did you choose me to
be a Jew?
Why me?
Why me 0.2.
It's like winning the lottery,but like the opposite of winning
(32:14):
the lottery.
You know why me?
Why, because it being a jew,comes with such a heavy, heavy
emotional price yeah it being ajew I.
I was born into this world withtrauma in my bones and just
even being just existing.
(32:36):
I have trauma and the beginning.
I don't think I shared this.
Oh, maybe I shared this when wehad Raquel.
Remember Raquel?
I did a breathwork workshop withher for like 30 minutes and I
did breathwork and I had visions.
And I had two visions and thiswas like a couple of weeks post
(33:00):
October 7th, like I went therecause I wanted some like relief,
you know, and during the breathwork, like you can go into like
a deep, trans or meditativestate.
And I had two visions and oneof them I was in my Safda, my
grandmother's body and I.
(33:22):
I was on a horse and carriageand I felt the, like the, the
horse, you know, like the, um,what's the noise that the horse
does?
Like the when they're walking,like a trotting, horse trot,
horse trot, yeah, horse trot,horse trot, yeah.
(33:43):
So I felt gallop, right.
So I felt the, and I only sawmy grandmother's eyes.
She had beautiful green eyesand I felt her fear and I felt
her hunger, a physical hungerthat I've never experienced in
my life literal like literalhunger.
I felt her hunger and I felt herfear.
(34:03):
And the second vision that Ihad it was my father, much
younger 20, 18, 19, 20 years old, like very young, and all
around him was rubble like a warzone, and that was in black and
(34:28):
white.
And I had these two visions andin the last year I think about
those visions a lot Because Ifeel like it's trauma that
wasn't processed before I wasborn and it's in me, it's in my
body.
Does that make sense?
Speaker 1 (34:49):
Yeah, yeah, it makes all the sense in the world.
Speaker 2 (34:55):
And this is just from my father and my grandmother.
And then there's years of myancestors previous.
It's never been easy for Jewsand I can only imagine what
they've been through, and I fear, are my daughters going to have
(35:18):
this unprocessed trauma.
Speaker 1 (35:20):
Listen, can't worry about that.
I mean some who knows.
Yeah, you can only work throughthe things that you are
afforded the ability to workthrough in this lifetime, and
then whatever's left to sort outis for the next generation to
sort out.
It's kind of the way it is foranybody.
You just are uniquelypositioned with more than most.
Speaker 2 (35:42):
But the point is, I was already born into this world
with all this stuff, and a lotof Jews who are listening to
this, who have experienced thislast year, also have it in them.
Even the Jews that areanti-Zionist.
That's a form of trauma.
(36:02):
Yeah, their trauma is playingout in a different way.
You know they're they'rethey're they want to assimilate
so bad, they want to fit in, sobad that they're going against
their own people.
Speaker 1 (36:14):
Yep.
Speaker 2 (36:15):
And this again.
This has been played outmultiple times in history.
Speaker 1 (36:18):
This is not new, not the first example.
Speaker 2 (36:23):
And, of course, those people piss me off, but I try
to have empathy towards them,understanding that it is a, it's
a form of, it's a traumaresponse.
Trauma response, yeah Right, iswanting to fit in, is wanting
to be accepted, is wanting to bepart of something.
Right that is popular.
Speaker 1 (36:44):
Yeah, self-preservation technique for
sure, yeah, until it's notUltimately, it works against any
self-preservation as a whole.
But you can understand wherethat line of thinking comes from
.
But regardless, one year, 100plus hostages still that need to
(37:10):
come home.
At this point, the hostagesreturning likely does not end
the fighting.
It might end the fight,fighting in Gaza, which you know
ultimately needs to happen.
It needs to happen as quicklyas the hostages are returned and
(37:32):
Hamas puts down its weapons,like the that.
That portion of this, thiswhole war can can be over with
those two things in an instant.
But the dominoes that havefallen, especially recently,
have launched something biggerthan that that I don't think the
(37:52):
fighting stops altogether now.
It's gone too far and for toolong, and now Israel has to bag
up the trash and actually takeit out.
Speaker 2 (38:05):
It's crazy.
You know.
I part of me wishes that onOctober 8th the international
community would would have wentinto the streets and demanded
the hostages to be released.
Speaker 1 (38:22):
You know yeah, in the war, in the war in gaza would
have been over and none of therest of this would have happened
.
But a year out now, you know,part of me wants to believe that
this played out exactly how ithad to, regardless of the of the
(38:42):
, the cost of life that it iscosting and the cost of innocent
life that it is costing.
Speaker 2 (38:51):
That's a it's a hard thing to say because and I
understand what you're sayingbut you know, I think about,
like Hirsch and I think aboutHirsch's mother.
You know these and all the 1200people that, uh, you know we
would just watch the documentaryWe'll dance.
I watched the documentary We'lldance again on Paramount,
highly recommend you watch it.
It's about the Nova Novafestival and you watch it and it
(39:14):
just I it's a straw, it's astruggle.
Yeah, you know, and I know wetalked about faith and hope and
Judaism in the last episode, butit's something that I really
struggle like, oh, it was meantto happen, this was meant to
happen.
You know how do you say that tofamily members of people who
were brutally?
Speaker 1 (39:35):
murdered.
It's way harder to do that, butit was meant to happen because
it did.
And I know that sounds callous,but if you are to lean into
(39:58):
faith, as we have been doingmore and more and I've been
doing more even well beforeOctober 7th there's one thing
that I know is that I know itwas meant to happen because it
did, because we can't just saythat about the good things that
happen and would I have a toughtime sitting across from from
(40:21):
Rachel Poland and saying that,yeah, but I would still believe
it and having heard her speakmultiple times, I would.
I would say some part of herbelieves it too and I would have
to believe it.
If it was my kid, I would haveto.
(40:43):
I would go insane.
And there are, you know, ahundred plus families that still
still are dealing with that andI don't really know how to end
(41:12):
this episode.
If I'm being honest, I don'tknow what resolve looks like.
We don't have it.
Speaker 2 (41:17):
No.
Speaker 1 (41:17):
We don't have resolve , so there isn't any.
Yet it's like a day't have it.
No, we don't have resolve, sothere isn't any.
Speaker 2 (41:21):
Yet it's like a day-by-day thing and you know,
today was horrible.
It's like I always say, like Idon't even have any tears left.
After this year, I don't havetears left, and today I cried.
After this year, I don't havetears left today and I, today I
(41:44):
cried, seeing seeing themissiles you know hit and and
seeing my family group chat andmy sister asking if you know the
kids are okay and um, it's justso intense.
Yeah, it was very intense, acouple of hours very intense and
I and and I have to go about myday and I'm going on a work
call and like somebody's like,oh, the weather's looking better
(42:05):
, and I'm just like, yeah, youknow, and it's just like a, it's
like a living a parallel life,and it's really hard to go about
my day.
You know, it's really reallyhard.
A lot of days I'm fake, really,faking it till.
I make it, and I'm really likepushing through when I want to
be curled up in a ball and watchthe news.
(42:28):
And that's just been thereality of the last year of how,
how hard it's been.
Speaker 1 (42:34):
And I told you today, like my, my WhatsApp with, with
Daniel, who's Israeli, who Iwork with in real estate.
One message is hey, did XYZhappen with this property?
Did we do that?
Hey, did you see?
100 ballistic missiles arecoming in?
Yeah, it's crazy.
Oh, by the way, did we get thisdone?
Oh, my God, did you see the?
(42:55):
It's psychotic.
It's a psychotic way to existand go about your day, and it's
been like like every day youwake up with that possibility.
Speaker 2 (43:04):
Yeah.
Speaker 1 (43:06):
It's crazy.
Speaker 2 (43:07):
Yeah.
And it continues but all we cando is a show up, and it helps
to talk about it, and it helpsto it and it helps to be
consistent in our routines andthis is where trying to be
healthy and be cold plunge.
(43:28):
We got to get back on our coldplunging and just take it day by
day.
Speaker 1 (43:31):
Yeah, you know, that's where we're at and I
can't believe it's october 7,2023 yeah just we've been stuck
in that on this date and in thisdate forever means this you
(43:53):
know, like I hope to god thatthe war is over all of it, by
the time this date rolls aroundnext year.
But but when the state rollsaround next year, it will still
bear the weight of what happenedtwo years prior.
Speaker 2 (44:05):
No, I know that I'm never going to be the same
person.
Speaker 1 (44:09):
No.
Speaker 2 (44:10):
That this has changed me in so many ways.
Yeah, and I see the worlddifferently.
I see other people differently.
I see other people differently.
Yeah, I definitely don't trustas I used to.
I don't have faith as I used toin terms of like other people,
(44:36):
and I think that's going to besomething hard for me, you know.
You know what I'm saying.
Speaker 1 (44:43):
Yeah, I do, but I think it's also somebody that I
look up to.
A lot says, if somebody askshim if he trusts them, he always
says no, Right, Like do youtrust me?
And he's like no.
(45:09):
And I'm like really.
He's like yeah, no, why would I?
He's like all I have to do istrust in my ability to, to trust
my instincts about you.
Speaker 2 (45:12):
That's a good point.
Speaker 1 (45:14):
Which I think is what is sharpened in you and I think
, is a better way to be.
You don't have to trustsomebody else.
You don't have to trust anybody.
You don't have to trust me.
You don't have to trust yourmom.
You don't have to trust yourdad.
You have to trust in yourability to know what's right and
wrong and know where to go.
Speaker 2 (45:28):
Yeah.
Speaker 1 (45:29):
You trust in your instincts about other people.
You don't have to put yourtrust in other people.
I Okay.
Speaker 2 (45:43):
Bronx is different.
Speaker 1 (45:44):
This year has been a year unlike any other and we'll
stand alone as a year unlike anyother for what I imagine is the
rest of our lives, For betteror for worse.
But I do believe that once weget a chance to recuperate from
this at some point hopefullysooner than later we will
(46:07):
understand that the wisdom andthe lessons that we got out of
it were valuable and will makeus better people because of it.
That's all we can do, yeah.
Speaker 2 (46:20):
And we'll get through .
Can do yeah, and we'll getthrough this too.
Speaker 1 (46:23):
Yeah, Okay.
Well, we'll be back at it withI don't even know what I would
call regular, regularlyscheduled programming.
Speaker 2 (46:36):
Maybe something happier.
Speaker 1 (46:38):
Something happier.
Speaker 2 (46:40):
Yeah.
Speaker 1 (46:40):
Okay, we'll see what we can do.
I mean, we just released anepisode about a TV show and then
we come back with this Welcometo the ride.
This is our life, this is itYou're getting it and we keep it
real.
Yeah, all right, let's go tobed, okay, peace, peace.
Speaker 2 (47:03):
Okay, all right, bronxie, all right, let's go to
bed okay, peace, peace, okay.
Speaker 1 (47:06):
All right bronxy, all right buddy.
okay, um, welcome back.
This is being released onoctober 7th, 2024, so it has
been, as of today, a year sincethe horrific attacks on Israel
from Hamas that saw the murderof several thousand Jewish
(00:36):
people stolen from their homes,stolen from the music festival
and, more than likely, unlessthings change in the coming days
, there are still over 100innocent men, women and small
children still being heldcaptive in Gaza right now.
(00:56):
We wanted to release somethingthat sort of honored the
one-year mark, something wecertainly hoped we would never
have to do, but we are, and it'sbeen the longest year, but also
(01:20):
still feels like yesterday thatwe woke up on a Saturday
morning to the news of theattack.
I mean, it really feels like amonth ago and 10 years ago all
at the same time, like lineartime does not apply to what the
experience has been for us, forthe community, for us, for the
(01:43):
community.
So with that, uh, I don't knowexactly where this will go, um,
but we're going to give it ourbest shot and see where it takes
us.
And, um, we're also ironicallyor not ironically, we are
(02:09):
recording this on October 1st.
It's about seven hours afterIran launched 180 ballistic
missiles at the state of Israel,many of which landed in some
versions, some were shrapnellanded, some actually hit
directly into Israel.
(02:30):
Thank God no Israelis werekilled in the attack, although
there was a terrorist attacksimultaneously that seems to be
it's hard to say if it wascoordinated or not but did take
the lives of six innocentIsraelis.
And then there was aPalestinian in Jericho that was
(02:51):
killed by the shrapnel of one ofthe IRGC's missiles.
So a very heavy day that iscommemorating a very heavy year.
It was a very intense two hoursto see and to know, in this
case, unlike in April when Iranlaunched their barrage of
(03:14):
rockets.
Those were different, becausethose were drones, those were
cruise missiles, they were notballistic missiles that can
cover the ground between Tehranand Israel in 12 minutes.
The other ones in April, takemuch longer.
You have much more heads up andthey're easier to deal with.
Regardless, either one is anact of war, essentially against
(03:40):
the state of Israel, and thisone will likely prove, by the
time we release this podcast, tobe an escalation that Israel
will respond to in a verypowerful way.
And who knows where we'll be inthe next five days.
But here we are a year later,nonetheless still dealing with
(04:01):
the day-to-day violence, war,trauma, anxiety, intensity that
has not given much room forlight or real hope to see the
light at the end of the tunnelat all, aside from a few moments
of joy where either the hostagewas released, some were rescued
(04:23):
.
Beyond that, the joyous momentsfrom this are few and far
between.
Speaker 2 (04:30):
Yeah, well, very well said, I think, a lot about the
night before.
It was Friday night and it'sinteresting because we weren't
doing Shabbat like prettyregularly.
But that night we had Shabbatdinner and we had some friends
over and I decided to make likean Israeli meal.
(04:53):
I don't know, I just decidedlike I wanted just to make
schnitzel and Israeli salad andhummus and pita and just like
have a good time with friendsand we had a really good night.
Speaker 1 (05:04):
Amazing night.
Speaker 2 (05:04):
And I remember going to sleep that night like just
feeling good, and then Saturdaymorning I think, you got out of
bed.
You went.
Noah woke up.
Speaker 1 (05:17):
Yeah.
Speaker 2 (05:17):
And I looked on my phone.
I had hundreds of missedmessages and calls and I didn't
know it was.
I couldn't, you know, catch mybearing and but I saw one
message and I don't know why,but it stood out to me and it
was a message of my group chat.
Girls that I grew up with whenI lived in Israel were on a
group chat and one of them senta message like sending you all
(05:41):
hugs.
And I don't know why, butthat's when I knew that
something awful happened.
I don't know why.
It was just like, like, justsent, seeing that message,
sending you all hugs, hopeeveryone's okay.
My, I like I remember my heartsinking.
And that's when I opened thenew, you know the news and saw
(06:03):
everything that was going on andI couldn't believe it.
I couldn't believe it and no,right away, called my parent, my
parents they were in Israel atthe time called my sister Um,
couldn't reach my sister,messaging Like it, just like
it's so much going on.
You know, you, I have so manypeople that I love in Israel and
it's just like and I'm tryingto figure it out Like what was
(06:27):
going on, like I saw, I rememberI saw one video of Hamas
terrorists, like shooting atpeople in the street and people
being taken hostage.
It was like a barrage ofhorrible images as I opened my
eyes on a Saturday morning andthen we saw like images from
Nova and I was like Lee, myniece.
(06:48):
She's 26 years old and sheloves to go party and she loves
to go to raves and, and rightaway I Lee's okay, you know.
But then she said, you know, alot of her friends are missing
and it was just all this stuffgoing on and it was so
overwhelming and it just feelslike since that morning, every
(07:15):
single morning, I wake up and Iexperience it again in some form
or way.
I experience trauma everysingle day and I'm expecting bad
news every single day.
And the worst part of of thatfirst day was when I was kind of
(07:36):
re-reporting what was going onin the news.
Right away, in my messages, inmy DMs, people were saying that
Israel is committing genocideand saying all these things
about Israel and all that,basically that we had it coming,
that we deserve, basically thatwe deserve this, or what about?
People were what abouting?
What about Palestinians?
(08:02):
And I obviously didn't have thetime and the energy and space
to respond to these people Ijust like blocked right away.
But I couldn't believe thatmost of the messages that I was
getting from people was that washate and very little messages
asking me if my family is okay.
There were, and of course,there were, a ton of people that
reached out to ask me if myparents were okay, if my sister
(08:23):
was okay, and I'm very thankfulfor those people, but I'm, I was
horrified at the amount ofpeople that reached out to ask
me if my parents were okay, ifmy sister was okay, and I'm very
thankful for those people, butI'm, I was horrified at the
amount of people who, while myniece was still searching for
her friends, while we werefiguring out that everybody was
safe, while attacks were stillgoing on, at this point, people
(08:43):
were what abouting, were whatabouting and and repeating all
this Hamas propaganda, and Icouldn't believe it and it was
heartbreaking.
And then I and then started, andthen it was just, you know, the
next, the first two months of,uh, from October to December.
(09:06):
I don't even remember.
It's almost where I was likehere, but I was.
I was a shell of myself.
Yeah, the amount of of trauma,and you know it's it's, it's
like seeing the Holocaust liveon social media.
You know it's like seeing theHolocaust live on social media
and then seeing the world notgive a fuck about you, not give
(09:29):
a fuck about the hostages.
Or worse, yeah, and then thislast year and it's like and I
say this all the time I livelike a parallel, I live parallel
lives, like I have this part ofme that's in constant grief and
trauma and just horror, likejust constant.
(09:52):
And then there's the other sideof me that's with Noah and
going to the park and looking upat the sun and looking at
nature and making love with myhusband and the beauty of life
right, but deep down there'sthis trauma and guilt and shame
and every possible feeling thatyou could possibly feel, a
(10:15):
negative feeling, and it's beenheartbreaking.
It's been heartbreaking beingJewish and being Israeli and
being villainized and beingcalled a baby killer and being
called all these horrible things.
Because I'm proud to be Jewish,because I'm proud to be Israeli
(10:42):
, I don't have an Israelipassport.
I lived in Israel six years.
Others people could say you'renot Israeli, you were born in
fucking Canada.
What are you in Israel?
But I feel Israeli.
I've always felt Israeli.
I grew up in an Israeli home.
My grandparents survived theHolocaust and the only country
(11:04):
that would take them was Israel.
My, my grandparents, on myfather's side, escaped Morocco
when he was eight years old,with nothing, with only the
shirt on his back and the onlycountry that would take him was
Israel.
My father fought two wars andmy father was a musician.
He had no interest in being inthe IDF, but the IDF is at 18,
(11:28):
you are forced to serve in themilitary, and my father had to
fight in two wars and God knowswhat he saw.
So, yes, I am proud of where Icome from.
I am proud of the Jewish nation,am proud of the Jewish nation
and to see people villainize acountry that I love so much and
(11:56):
it's not perfect and I discussedthis in previous time.
I've been protesting BibiNetanyahu since I'm 13 years old
, literally, you know, I'm notnecessarily like, like I'm not
happy necessarily with mygovernment in America or like,
or I was in Canada, right, doesit mean that I'm not proud of of
being Israeli and Jewish?
(12:17):
I am very proud and I alwayswill be, and no matter how
unpopular it is and no matterhow many horrible words people
will call me, I will never,never, turn my back on my
country, ever, ever, and I wantpeace more than anybody, and
(12:38):
I've always, and this is my life, this is literally my life.
And to see Americans light thisis literally my life and to see
Americans you know with fromfucking butt, fuck nowhere or
whatever, who have no skin inthe game, who have never been to
the Middle East, who've madethe pro-Palestinian cause their
whole fucking personality, it'sso it makes me sick.
Speaker 1 (13:02):
Yeah.
Speaker 2 (13:02):
Because they don't care about Palestinian lives.
They don't care, they're justleeched themselves onto a cause
because it's trendy and popular,Dehumanizing Israelis,
dehumanizing Jews that our livesdon't matter.
I've been.
(13:25):
I just I've been called everyhorrible fucking name and like,
and it's almost like, to a pointwhere it doesn't sting anymore.
Speaker 1 (13:32):
Yeah.
Speaker 2 (13:35):
You know it doesn't sting anymore.
Speaker 1 (13:36):
Yeah.
Speaker 2 (13:44):
And sometimes I try to find the silver lining.
And the silver lining isgetting closer to my faith,
getting closer to being Jewish,it's getting closer to my family
.
Right, it's finding mycommunity in Jersey, the Jewish
community, and taking out thetrash.
(14:04):
Yeah, in Jersey, the Jewishcommunity, and taking out the
trash.
Yeah, the universe has takenout the trash.
Speaker 1 (14:12):
Yeah.
Speaker 2 (14:12):
So much trash.
Speaker 1 (14:17):
Yeah, the friend group is smaller.
There are people that I wouldnot consider myself close with
anymore, that I may haveconsidered beforehand.
And what has been the mostshocking to me, especially as
somebody who came into thisconflict, a relatively blank
(14:41):
slate, right, I didn't know that.
I was aware of the of, of thetension between the two groups.
I mean, it was literally, Ithink, the day before our first
trip to Israel when there was ashooting on Dizengoff, which is
the like the main street and oneof the main streets where
(15:04):
people hang out, the bars andstuff in Tel Aviv.
There was a shooting, aterrorist attack in Dizengov.
So it was always a thing.
And then, both times we went, wedidn't go to the old city of
Jerusalem just because tensionswere high, for whatever reason.
Well, we go during the holidaysand during the holidays.
(15:24):
The tensions seem to flare up alittle bit more.
During the holidays and duringthe holidays, the tensions seem
to flare up a little bit more.
So, going into this relativelya blank slate, what I found so
shocking with people that I knowthat, when confronted about
sharing misinformation fromsources that are that are are
wildly biased against Israel,the staunchness with which they
(15:47):
defend their ill-conceivedpositions, the rebuttals
rebuttals that you would not seein any other moment like this
in history, where if a blackperson said to you during Black
Lives Matter, during COVID, hey,what you're sharing is harmful
(16:08):
to our people, I would like youto take some consideration about
what you're sharing before youshare it, you wouldn't go.
No, I think I'm going to do itanyway, because this seems
pretty right and I think I'mmore correct than you are.
A person with lived experienceis telling me and this is not
just like a one-off thing thisis across the board with people
(16:28):
that.
I know personally, with very fewexceptions and there are
exceptions there have beenpeople that have listened, that
have taken recommendations forbooks and read them and said,
hey, thank you for letting meknow about this book.
I really appreciate it, butthat is the exception to the
rule that seems to be.
That is the exception to therule that seems to be.
I just read an article and Ihave a friend that told me X, y,
(16:51):
z and I know more than you now.
Yeah, almost across the board.
It's, it's like from people thatI've had people tell me to
educate myself.
Speaker 2 (17:01):
I grew up in this conflict right.
Not only did I live in Israel, Iwas also part of an exchange
program with Palestinianstudents.
You know I was volunteering forMeretz, which is the most
leftist political organizationin Israel.
Like as leftist and asprogressive as you can can
(17:23):
possibly possibly.
Yeah, I studied middle easthistory and my teacher was a
christian egyptian.
No bias there actually leantowards not loving israel so
much, but I learned from him andso I know this conflict and
(17:44):
seeing people in my dms who've,who I who've literally probably
got their information fromtiktok yeah but even from media.
Look how, how, how.
The new york times, obscurewashington post, like the, like
the.
Speaker 1 (18:01):
The bias is crazy they get accused of bias both
ways.
What's interesting about thoseis you literally have to go
writer by writer, Like it's notone institution leaning one way
or the other although some arefor sure but it's like there are
specific people that they allowto just write whatever trash
(18:21):
they want and just publish it.
Speaker 2 (18:24):
Right, but it, but it's.
What's crazy is that whathappened to listening and
learning right and no, and andI've tried to have constructive
conversations with people andpeople will sometimes come to me
in a respectful way and thenthey, as soon as they got my
attention, they switch on me.
You know what I'm saying andI've just it's not my job to
(18:46):
educate you.
It's not my job, like it's not,and I try to.
I think I've done a good job inthe past, like year, to try to
educate people and and sharesources that I, I, I trust, but
it, it, the villainizing has notstopped and the amount of
vitriol and hate and I, you know, I, I didn't share some of the
(19:11):
stuff that we were dealing with.
It was almost to a point whereI had to file a police report.
I've been, you know, I've beenput on a list, on a Zionist list
.
It's absurd that this is theworld we live in, it's 2024.
And me being Jewish and bebelieving in Israel's right to
exist and Israel right to defendhimself has made me a genocidal
(19:34):
baby killer.
Speaker 1 (19:36):
Yeah.
Speaker 2 (19:37):
And you know I'll post collaborations with other
businesses and I'll get the mosthorrifying comments and
thankfully, some of thesebusinesses appreciate what I do
and still respect me and respectmy views to still hire me.
Speaker 1 (19:54):
Yeah.
Speaker 2 (19:55):
And I'm thankful for those little opportunities that
I get, but it's definitelyaffected my bottom line.
It's affected my business.
I've lost thousands offollowers because I believe in
Israel's right to exist.
I'm not the Israeli government.
I don't have a direct line toBibi Netanyahu where I can call
him and be like hey, maybe youshould think about your strategy
(20:17):
a little bit differently.
I have zero Jews, and Israelishave no control over what the
government decides, have nocontrol over what the government
decides.
You know what I mean.
Nobody wanted this war,absolutely.
I'm horrified for the people ofGaza.
(20:41):
I'm horrified.
It's horrifying.
I don't want to see dead babiesand all these things.
Nobody wants to see death Like.
It's not something that I wantor any Jewish person wants.
We do not celebrate death.
We don't celebrate when peopledie.
We celebrate when terroristsdie, get killed.
Yeah, you know, I postedsomething like a week ago when
(21:06):
Nasrallah, who is a hugeterrorist.
Speaker 1 (21:09):
One of the biggest.
Speaker 2 (21:10):
One of the biggest terrorists and Israel
assassinated him and, yeah, Iwas happy about it and somebody
called me disgusting.
I'm disgusting, okay.
Speaker 1 (21:21):
Oh well.
I guess I'm disgusting.
Yeah, oh well.
And what is becoming more clear, especially in the past I don't
know, two weeks is now.
What is ultimately happening isIsrael is being backed into a
(21:42):
corner where they are literallysingle-handedly going to
recreate the Middle East,literally single-handedly going
to recreate the Middle East.
Speaker 2 (21:51):
They are taking out the trash, they are curing the
cancer of the Islamic regime andit is going to go down in
history as one of the mostsweeping reforms of the Middle
East, and I want people tounderstand you know, if you know
nothing about this conflict,Israel is not fighting against
(22:12):
the Palestinian people.
Israel is fighting Hamas.
Speaker 1 (22:15):
They're not fighting against the Lebanese people.
Israel is not fighting againstthe Lebanese people.
Speaker 2 (22:19):
They're fighting against Hezbollah.
Israel is not fighting againstthe Iranian people.
They're fighting against theIRGC.
Speaker 1 (22:27):
They're not fighting against Yemen.
They're fighting against theIRGC.
They're not fighting againstYemen, they're fighting the
Houthis.
Speaker 2 (22:30):
They're fighting radical Islamism, which nobody
wants.
All these pro-choice peoplethat follow me, the liberals,
the LGBTQ community trust mewhen I tell you you don't want
Sharia law in our country.
Speaker 1 (22:49):
Unless you want to be dead, because that's what it
boils down to.
If you want to usher in yourown execution, great go nuts.
You don't have to wait, you cango over there, yeah.
But that's not.
That's not to say that israelwants war with any of these
(23:17):
countries.
We are not invading countries,we are at war with iranian
proxies and, and the distinctionbetween iran and the irgc needs
to be made, because again, it'siran if you go back and look
what iran was before the irgctook over it was a beautiful,
beautiful, beautiful culture,beautiful country, modernized.
Speaker 2 (23:39):
Like living the life do you want to tell people how
the irgc took over Iran?
How did it happen?
Speaker 1 (23:49):
Colleges.
It started.
Speaker 2 (23:51):
It started with the left.
Speaker 1 (23:56):
It started with the left and started with academia
and propagandizing institutionsof higher learning.
I mean, this is how a lot offascism starts.
I mean, this isn't a one-off.
This is like.
This is how it starts.
This is ding ding ding dingthis is the blueprint.
I mean it is not hard to draw aline from from 40, 50 years ago
(24:16):
, young minds who aren't fullydeveloped right tell them that
their life is terrible, rightthat they need a change.
Give them a sense of community,a sense of belonging, give them
a uniform, give them theplaybook, and then let them do
the rest.
Speaker 2 (24:32):
Right, and then until it's too late.
Speaker 1 (24:35):
Right, but we've seen this movie and the adults in
the room remember seeing thismovie and aren't going to let it
play out to the end again.
And that's just the way it is.
And at this point, israel'skind of said with or without you
, we are going to do what isnecessary to put a stop to this
(24:57):
and you either get on board oryou get out of the way.
That's essentially what they'vetold the United States.
They didn't inform them of thestrike against the strike
against Nasrallah.
So no, we can't afford it yeah.
Speaker 2 (25:11):
No, it's afford yeah.
Speaker 1 (25:14):
There's always a leak in every blabber mouth and
every friend group, and we'rethe blabber mouth.
Speaker 2 (25:20):
Yeah, I agree.
I think Israel should do itsown thing at this point and and
because everybody telling uswhat to do, like we're cleaning
up the world.
Speaker 1 (25:29):
Yeah, we don't need any anchors attached to our legs
.
And look what happens.
Look at the speed andefficiency with which they
operate, now that they don'tgive a fuck what anybody thinks,
like the way that they haveeliminated Hezbollah and
crippled them in the matter ofless than a month.
Speaker 2 (25:49):
And again, all of this is as a result of attacks.
The war in Gaza is as a resultof them still holding our
hostages.
It's a result of them murdering1,200 people in the most
horrible and horrifying way,coming into our most peaceful
communities and killing the mostpeaceful of our residents.
(26:13):
That is, in itself, a show thatthey do not want peace.
There is no diplomacy withHamas.
Speaker 1 (26:21):
Nope.
Speaker 2 (26:23):
And they embed themselves in humanitarian zones
.
They shoot rockets fromhumanitarian zones.
They, you know, use their ownpeople as human shields.
And again and then the war.
And what's happening in Lebanonis as a result of 11 months of
(26:44):
nonstop rockets, 11 months.
Speaker 1 (26:48):
Something like 10,000 rockets.
Speaker 2 (26:49):
In what country in the world would withstand 11
months of nonstop rockets, rightwhen 100,000 people had to
evacuate their homes for 11months?
Speaker 1 (27:04):
Right, and what part of Lebanon is Israel occupying?
Speaker 2 (27:10):
Nothing.
Speaker 1 (27:11):
What part of Yemen is Israel occupying?
Speaker 2 (27:14):
Exactly.
So a year, a year of this, ayear of this has elapsed, and
you know, and we're labeled asthe aggressor and we're fighting
a war on seven fronts and we'rethe aggressor.
You can't even see israel onthe map.
It's this fucking small.
(27:35):
It's the size of new jersey.
It's the size of new jersey.
And we're the aggressor andwe're the colonizers.
There are are 22 Muslimcountries.
There is one Jewish nation.
We just want everybody to leaveus alone.
That's it.
(27:57):
We just want, we want to beable to live in our indigenous
homeland.
We want to live in peace.
We want to.
We want to be left alone and inreturn, we will innovate, we
will build, we will.
You know the COVID vaccine.
How much, how much innovationhas come out of this tiny
fucking country.
We will give back to the world.
(28:20):
Just leave us alone.
Speaker 1 (28:26):
Yeah, because if you don't, they'll innovate in ways
that will blow up your pagers.
Speaker 2 (28:32):
Which is crazy, and this shit makes me fucking proud
.
That whole thing with thebeepers.
How of a precise attack onhezbollah?
Yeah, and, and what?
And of course, the jew hatersare they're mad when we're
precise, right, they're mad whenwe're not precise.
(28:54):
You know what is it gonna beLike?
What's the way?
Speaker 1 (28:59):
The only way is to lay down and die.
Speaker 2 (29:01):
Yes, People love dead Jews.
Speaker 1 (29:04):
Yeah, the way is to lay down and die Love dead Jews
Right.
Speaker 2 (29:10):
Well, we're not going anywhere.
Speaker 1 (29:11):
Nope.
Speaker 2 (29:12):
We've survived everything, and the more I like
get deep into my Judaism and themore I learn about all the
holidays and the more I learnabout our history.
You just open a book ofTehillim which is Psalms right,
and it's constant stories ofsome schmuck.
Speaker 1 (29:31):
Resilience, yeah, yeah.
Speaker 2 (29:36):
You can't get rid of us.
Speaker 1 (29:37):
No.
Speaker 2 (29:38):
And it's kind of like my story as chickpea you can't
get rid of us.
No, and it's kind of like mystory as chickpea you can't get
rid of me.
You know what I mean.
Speaker 1 (29:43):
You'll leave on your own terms.
No, not a moment before.
Guess what.
If you do end up leaving here,it'll probably be to go to
Israel.
Speaker 2 (29:55):
Yeah.
Speaker 1 (29:57):
And they'll still be mad.
Yeah.
Speaker 2 (30:01):
And they'll still be mad.
And I and I think the silverlining for me in this year is
just getting to a place of beingcomfortable being hate, like
for years I struggle with peoplebeing people hating me, right.
For a whole decade I've been indoing this, right, I've been on
social media and I've beenblogging and doing my thing and
(30:23):
the haters always got to mealmost to a point where I
stopped.
I mean, I stopped writing twoyears ago, right, I stopped
doing something that I reallytruly loved because of the
bullying.
It was just.
I got burnt out from it, right.
But now, after a year, I'm kindof in a place where I'm like,
ok, they hate me because they'reanti-Semites.
(30:44):
It was never personal.
Speaker 1 (30:46):
Sure.
Speaker 2 (30:47):
It was never really personal.
They don't know me.
They just see me as a Jew, as aIsraeli and whatever tropes
come with that, that I'm agentrifier and that I'm what
else All the things that theysay right, and at the end of the
day, I know who I am.
I worked really hard to get towhere I am.
(31:08):
I still continue to work hard.
Nothing is given to me on asilver platter.
Nothing was given to my parents.
My parents worked very hard tobuild a life that they have and
I'm very inspired by them and Iwork really hard.
I wake up every morning and Ibust my ass for my clients and
for my family and for mycommunity, and I know who I am
(31:32):
and people can call me all thethings and it won't matter.
Speaker 1 (31:38):
Yeah, I sort of ripped that bandaid off just
being in a band when I was 20years old.
It got kind of popular and theneverybody tells you how shitty
your music is.
You read enough comments likethat and you get over it you
withstand pretty much anything,yeah and I'm proud.
Speaker 2 (31:53):
I'm proud to be jewish more than ever, more than
ever.
I'm proud to be part of thiscommunity and sometimes I'm like
I look at the sky and I'm likeHashem why did you choose me to
be a Jew?
Why me?
Why me 0.2.
It's like winning the lottery,but like the opposite of winning
(32:14):
the lottery.
You know why me?
Why, because it being a jew,comes with such a heavy, heavy
emotional price yeah it being ajew I.
I was born into this world withtrauma in my bones and just
even being just existing.
(32:36):
I have trauma and the beginning.
I don't think I shared this.
Oh, maybe I shared this when wehad Raquel.
Remember Raquel?
I did a breathwork workshop withher for like 30 minutes and I
did breathwork and I had visions.
And I had two visions and thiswas like a couple of weeks post
(33:00):
October 7th, like I went therecause I wanted some like relief,
you know, and during the breathwork, like you can go into like
a deep, trans or meditativestate.
And I had two visions and oneof them I was in my Safda, my
grandmother's body and I.
(33:22):
I was on a horse and carriageand I felt the, like the, the
horse, you know, like the, um,what's the noise that the horse
does?
Like the when they're walking,like a trotting, horse trot,
horse trot, yeah, horse trot,horse trot, yeah.
(33:43):
So I felt gallop, right.
So I felt the, and I only sawmy grandmother's eyes.
She had beautiful green eyesand I felt her fear and I felt
her hunger, a physical hungerthat I've never experienced in
my life literal like literalhunger.
I felt her hunger and I felt herfear.
(34:03):
And the second vision that Ihad it was my father, much
younger 20, 18, 19, 20 years old, like very young, and all
around him was rubble like a warzone, and that was in black and
(34:28):
white.
And I had these two visions andin the last year I think about
those visions a lot Because Ifeel like it's trauma that
wasn't processed before I wasborn and it's in me, it's in my
body.
Does that make sense?
Speaker 1 (34:49):
Yeah, yeah, it makes all the sense in the world.
Speaker 2 (34:55):
And this is just from my father and my grandmother.
And then there's years of myancestors previous.
It's never been easy for Jewsand I can only imagine what
they've been through, and I fear, are my daughters going to have
(35:18):
this unprocessed trauma.
Speaker 1 (35:20):
Listen, can't worry about that.
I mean some who knows.
Yeah, you can only work throughthe things that you are
afforded the ability to workthrough in this lifetime, and
then whatever's left to sort outis for the next generation to
sort out.
It's kind of the way it is foranybody.
You just are uniquelypositioned with more than most.
Speaker 2 (35:42):
But the point is, I was already born into this world
with all this stuff, and a lotof Jews who are listening to
this, who have experienced thislast year, also have it in them.
Even the Jews that areanti-Zionist.
That's a form of trauma.
(36:02):
Yeah, their trauma is playingout in a different way.
You know they're they'rethey're they want to assimilate
so bad, they want to fit in, sobad that they're going against
their own people.
Speaker 1 (36:14):
Yep.
Speaker 2 (36:15):
And this again.
This has been played outmultiple times in history.
Speaker 1 (36:18):
This is not new, not the first example.
Speaker 2 (36:23):
And, of course, those people piss me off, but I try
to have empathy towards them,understanding that it is a, it's
a form of, it's a traumaresponse.
Trauma response, yeah Right, iswanting to fit in, is wanting
to be accepted, is wanting to bepart of something.
Right that is popular.
Speaker 1 (36:44):
Yeah, self-preservation technique for
sure, yeah, until it's notUltimately, it works against any
self-preservation as a whole.
But you can understand wherethat line of thinking comes from
.
But regardless, one year, 100plus hostages still that need to
(37:10):
come home.
At this point, the hostagesreturning likely does not end
the fighting.
It might end the fight,fighting in Gaza, which you know
ultimately needs to happen.
It needs to happen as quicklyas the hostages are returned and
(37:32):
Hamas puts down its weapons,like the that.
That portion of this, thiswhole war can can be over with
those two things in an instant.
But the dominoes that havefallen, especially recently,
have launched something biggerthan that that I don't think the
(37:52):
fighting stops altogether now.
It's gone too far and for toolong, and now Israel has to bag
up the trash and actually takeit out.
Speaker 2 (38:05):
It's crazy.
You know.
I part of me wishes that onOctober 8th the international
community would would have wentinto the streets and demanded
the hostages to be released.
Speaker 1 (38:22):
You know yeah, in the war, in the war in gaza would
have been over and none of therest of this would have happened
.
But a year out now, you know,part of me wants to believe that
this played out exactly how ithad to, regardless of the of the
(38:42):
, the cost of life that it iscosting and the cost of innocent
life that it is costing.
Speaker 2 (38:51):
That's a it's a hard thing to say because and I
understand what you're sayingbut you know, I think about,
like Hirsch and I think aboutHirsch's mother.
You know these and all the 1200people that, uh, you know we
would just watch the documentaryWe'll dance.
I watched the documentary We'lldance again on Paramount,
highly recommend you watch it.
It's about the Nova Novafestival and you watch it and it
(39:14):
just I it's a straw, it's astruggle.
Yeah, you know, and I know wetalked about faith and hope and
Judaism in the last episode, butit's something that I really
struggle like, oh, it was meantto happen, this was meant to
happen.
You know how do you say that tofamily members of people who
were brutally?
Speaker 1 (39:35):
murdered.
It's way harder to do that, butit was meant to happen because
it did.
And I know that sounds callous,but if you are to lean into
(39:58):
faith, as we have been doingmore and more and I've been
doing more even well beforeOctober 7th there's one thing
that I know is that I know itwas meant to happen because it
did, because we can't just saythat about the good things that
happen and would I have a toughtime sitting across from from
(40:21):
Rachel Poland and saying that,yeah, but I would still believe
it and having heard her speakmultiple times, I would.
I would say some part of herbelieves it too and I would have
to believe it.
If it was my kid, I would haveto.
(40:43):
I would go insane.
And there are, you know, ahundred plus families that still
still are dealing with that andI don't really know how to end
(41:12):
this episode.
If I'm being honest, I don'tknow what resolve looks like.
We don't have it.
Speaker 2 (41:17):
No.
Speaker 1 (41:17):
We don't have resolve , so there isn't any.
Yet it's like a day't have it.
No, we don't have resolve, sothere isn't any.
Speaker 2 (41:21):
Yet it's like a day-by-day thing and you know,
today was horrible.
It's like I always say, like Idon't even have any tears left.
After this year, I don't havetears left, and today I cried.
After this year, I don't havetears left today and I, today I
(41:44):
cried, seeing seeing themissiles you know hit and and
seeing my family group chat andmy sister asking if you know the
kids are okay and um, it's justso intense.
Yeah, it was very intense, acouple of hours very intense and
I and and I have to go about myday and I'm going on a work
call and like somebody's like,oh, the weather's looking better
(42:05):
, and I'm just like, yeah, youknow, and it's just like a, it's
like a living a parallel life,and it's really hard to go about
my day.
You know, it's really reallyhard.
A lot of days I'm fake, really,faking it till.
I make it, and I'm really likepushing through when I want to
be curled up in a ball and watchthe news.
(42:28):
And that's just been thereality of the last year of how,
how hard it's been.
Speaker 1 (42:34):
And I told you today, like my, my WhatsApp with, with
Daniel, who's Israeli, who Iwork with in real estate.
One message is hey, did XYZhappen with this property?
Did we do that?
Hey, did you see?
100 ballistic missiles arecoming in?
Yeah, it's crazy.
Oh, by the way, did we get thisdone?
Oh, my God, did you see the?
(42:55):
It's psychotic.
It's a psychotic way to existand go about your day, and it's
been like like every day youwake up with that possibility.
Speaker 2 (43:04):
Yeah.
Speaker 1 (43:06):
It's crazy.
Speaker 2 (43:07):
Yeah.
And it continues but all we cando is a show up, and it helps
to talk about it, and it helpsto it and it helps to be
consistent in our routines andthis is where trying to be
healthy and be cold plunge.
(43:28):
We got to get back on our coldplunging and just take it day by
day.
Speaker 1 (43:31):
Yeah, you know, that's where we're at and I
can't believe it's october 7,2023 yeah just we've been stuck
in that on this date and in thisdate forever means this you
(43:53):
know, like I hope to god thatthe war is over all of it, by
the time this date rolls aroundnext year.
But but when the state rollsaround next year, it will still
bear the weight of what happenedtwo years prior.
Speaker 2 (44:05):
No, I know that I'm never going to be the same
person.
Speaker 1 (44:09):
No.
Speaker 2 (44:10):
That this has changed me in so many ways.
Yeah, and I see the worlddifferently.
I see other people differently.
I see other people differently.
Yeah, I definitely don't trustas I used to.
I don't have faith as I used toin terms of like other people,
(44:36):
and I think that's going to besomething hard for me, you know.
You know what I'm saying.
Speaker 1 (44:43):
Yeah, I do, but I think it's also somebody that I
look up to.
A lot says, if somebody askshim if he trusts them, he always
says no, Right, Like do youtrust me?
And he's like no.
(45:09):
And I'm like really.
He's like yeah, no, why would I?
He's like all I have to do istrust in my ability to, to trust
my instincts about you.
Speaker 2 (45:12):
That's a good point.
Speaker 1 (45:14):
Which I think is what is sharpened in you and I think
, is a better way to be.
You don't have to trustsomebody else.
You don't have to trust anybody.
You don't have to trust me.
You don't have to trust yourmom.
You don't have to trust yourdad.
You have to trust in yourability to know what's right and
wrong and know where to go.
Speaker 2 (45:28):
Yeah.
Speaker 1 (45:29):
You trust in your instincts about other people.
You don't have to put yourtrust in other people.
I Okay.
Speaker 2 (45:43):
Bronx is different.
Speaker 1 (45:44):
This year has been a year unlike any other and we'll
stand alone as a year unlike anyother for what I imagine is the
rest of our lives, For betteror for worse.
But I do believe that once weget a chance to recuperate from
this at some point hopefullysooner than later we will
(46:07):
understand that the wisdom andthe lessons that we got out of
it were valuable and will makeus better people because of it.
That's all we can do, yeah.
Speaker 2 (46:20):
And we'll get through .
Can do yeah, and we'll getthrough this too.
Speaker 1 (46:23):
Yeah, Okay.
Well, we'll be back at it withI don't even know what I would
call regular, regularlyscheduled programming.
Speaker 2 (46:36):
Maybe something happier.
Speaker 1 (46:38):
Something happier.
Speaker 2 (46:40):
Yeah.
Speaker 1 (46:40):
Okay, we'll see what we can do.
I mean, we just released anepisode about a TV show and then
we come back with this Welcometo the ride.
This is our life, this is itYou're getting it and we keep it
real.
Yeah, all right, let's go tobed, okay, peace, peace.
Speaker 2 (47:03):
Okay, all right, bronxie, all right, let's go to
bed okay, peace, peace, okay.
Speaker 1 (47:06):
All right bronxy, all right buddy.
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