Episode Transcript
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David Kochberg (00:00):
Hello, Math
Therapy listeners! This is
(00:02):
David, Vanessa's producer, andbefore you skip this episode,
because I know you are notsubscribed to it to listen to
me, I could not resist puttingtogether a short bonus episode
to share with you.
So, Season 5 was a huge success,and I know everyone's back to
school, so if you missed any ofthe previous seasons, or you
need a little inspiration ormotivation right now, I
definitely recommend revisitingsome past episodes.
(00:25):
Now, I don't have to tell youthat Vanessa is a phenomenal
interviewer.
She's got such a natural talentfor putting guests at ease and
for diving right into complextopics.
However, there was one challengethat kept coming up this season.
Vanessa forgot how to saygoodbye.
This had never been an issue inthe early seasons of the
(00:47):
podcast, but I started to noticeit creep up a little in season
four.
And last season, it was totallyout of control, as you will soon
hear.
So, very quickly, all of ourinterviews are recorded
remotely, and they'll start withVanessa and the guest chatting a
little bit.
That way I can test out theaudio on both ends, and they can
get relaxed and comfortable witheach other before we begin
recording.
(01:07):
Then, in theory, at the end ofthe conversation, once Vanessa
has asked her famous final twoquestions and starts to wrap up,
she'll say something like,"Oh myGod, thank you so much for
coming on my podcast".
That's my Vanessa impression.
And then the guest will be like,"thanks for having me, that was
so much fun".
And then Vanessa would say bye,the guest says bye, and then
that would be the end of theinterview, but they would both
(01:29):
know that they'd be staying onafter the call to debrief.
They're just saying goodbye forthe podcast, they're not going
to say goodbye and hang up rightaway.
So that all seems very normal,right?
Well, she just couldn't do it.
Guest after guest, it actuallygot more and more awkward, and I
recently listened back to someof them and I thought they were
hilarious, so I just had toshare them with you because I
(01:50):
think you may too.
So without further ado, I giveyou what I consider to be my
personal crowning achievement inmy work on Math Therapy, a brief
bonus episode I like to call"TheAwkward Goodbye".
Vanessa Vakharia (02:05):
Okay.
Tell people where to find youand like what things to look you
up at.
Robert Kaplinsky (02:08):
Yeah.
So my website isrobertkaplinsky.com,
openmiddle.com Openmiddle onsocial media as well.
If you're interested, hit me up.
Vanessa Vakharia (02:17):
Okay, now we
have to say goodbye.
Okay.
Bye Bye
Robert Kaplinsky (02:24):
Bye Vanessa.
Vanessa Vakharia (02:25):
Bye You have
to say bye back.
Robert Kaplinsky (02:28):
Buh-bye
Vanessa Vakharia (02:31):
Oh my God.
I'm dead, if you could seeDavid's face right now.
I dunno!
David Kochberg (02:38):
Just, just say
goodbye as if you're saying
goodbye to someone.
Vanessa Vakharia (02:42):
You know how
you're always like, why do you
hang up so fast on the phone?
David Kochberg (02:46):
Yeah,
Vanessa Vakharia (02:46):
I think that's
why I think I have a problem
with doing it.
David Kochberg (02:50):
Just pre, you're
pretending you're, because
obviously you're not gonna hangup, but just like,
Vanessa Vakharia (02:54):
but it's
weird, it's inauthentic.
David Kochberg (02:56):
Just role play.
Imagine you were just sayinggoodbye to him.
Vanessa Vakharia (02:58):
Okay, Robert.
Great talk.
All right, I'll talk to youlater.
Bye.
David Kochberg (03:01):
That's not what
what you would do!
Vanessa Vakharia (03:02):
What do you
mean that's not what I would do?
What would I do?
David Kochberg (03:04):
You did it so
quickly!
Vanessa Vakharia (03:06):
But I do do it
quickly.
You're always getting mad at mecause you're like, why'd you
hang up so fast?
Okay, we're done by the way.
What a treat.
Oh my God.
I'm so glad I was eating asandwich on the floor of that
hallway that one day.
This has been amazing.
Um, Bye.
David Kochberg (03:29):
What's wrong
with you?
Liesl McConchie (03:32):
Okay.
That was pretty bad, Vanessa.
I'm sorry.
I'm with David on this one.
I'm sorry.
Vanessa Vakharia (03:36):
I feel like I,
I don't know.
I don't.
It's so
Liesl McConchie (03:39):
Try that again.
Try that again.
David Kochberg (03:41):
Just be like,
you say like, oh my God, this
has been so amazing.
Thank you so much for coming onthe podcast.
Vanessa Vakharia (03:46):
But I don't
say the word"bye"?
David Kochberg (03:47):
You don't have
to.
Vanessa Vakharia (03:48):
Fine.
Liesl, this has been absolutelyso amazing.
I'm truly honored.
Thank you so much for coming onmy podcast.
Liesl McConchie (03:54):
Thank you.
It's been such a pleasure.
David Kochberg (03:58):
That was a great
improvement.
And then if you wanted to takeit a step further, then you
could simply say bye.
Vanessa Vakharia (04:05):
But think
about it.
Watch this.
Liesl, thank you so much.
It's been amazing.
It's been an honor.
Thank you so much for coming onmy podcast.
Bye.
Liesl McConchie (04:13):
Oh
David Kochberg (04:13):
No, after she
says thank you.
Vanessa Vakharia (04:14):
Oh, after she
says thank you.
Liesl McConchie (04:15):
Yeah.
I got, yeah.
Let me, let, let me,
Vanessa Vakharia (04:17):
Okay.
Right.
Liesl, it has been so amazing.
It has been such an honor.
I'm such a huge fan.
Thank you so much for coming onmy podcast.
Liesl McConchie (04:23):
It's been an
absolute pleasure.
Thank you so much for having me.
Vanessa Vakharia (04:26):
Bye.
I don't like it.
I don't like it.
It's weird! It's weird.
Liesl McConchie (04:34):
David, edit it.
Make it sound right.
Crystal Watson (04:36):
you can find me
on Instagram crystalmwatson You
can find me atcrystalmwatson.com Um, or you
can find me out and about inCincinnati.
So if you see me on the streets,holler I'll, I'll say What's up.
I'm pretty, I'm, I'm a prettycool person.
Vanessa Vakharia (04:51):
You're so
cool.
Okay.
has been the fucking best.
You are the best.
Loved every single minute ofthis, and I hope to see you in
the streets of Cincinnati orWink, wink, wink, wink, Canada,
maybe sometime soon?
Crystal Watson (05:05):
I'm on my way.
I'm on my way.
Vanessa Vakharia (05:11):
That's the
end.
You don't need to say goodbyebecause the music will start
playing.
Oh my God, David is hanging hishead in his hands right now.
Crystal Watson (05:19):
Just say
goodbye.
David Kochberg (05:22):
Thanks for
coming on the podcast.
Vanessa Vakharia (05:23):
Thank you so
much for coming on my pod
David Kochberg (05:25):
Wait until I
finish talking and then say it.
Vanessa Vakharia (05:27):
Oh, Crystal,
thank you so much for coming on
the pod.
Crystal Watson (05:31):
You're welcome.
Goodbye, adios, auf wiedersehen,all of the things.
Vanessa Vakharia (05:35):
Bye.
She did it for me.
She did it for me.
That helped.
David Kochberg (05:40):
I know.
That's the thing you have totrust the guest to help you with
the goodbye.
Vanessa Vakharia (05:44):
Great, and
stay tuned.
Maybe we'll do episode two whereI live.
Read Dan Meyers's birth chart
Dan Meyer (05:50):
Bonus.
Bonus for, yeah, the subscribersbonus for the uh, Patreon
Vanessa Vakharia (05:55):
Okay, this has
been amazing.
This is the part where I saygoodbye.
Dan Meyer (05:59):
Thank you.
So long.
Vanessa Vakharia (06:00):
Goodbye.
Don't actually go though.
Dan Meyer (06:03):
Cut.
Vanessa Vakharia (06:04):
Did I, look, I
did it! I said, bye.
David Kochberg (06:07):
You did, but you
still were kind of awkward about
it, but you, but it was good.
It was better.
Vanessa Vakharia (06:10):
This has been
so fun.
I can't believe we did it.
I can't believe we met.
I can't believe we're bothCanadian.
I can't believe you used to be aprofessional paddler and
honestly, you're changing theworld.
This is so cool, and I thinkyou're great.
Peter Liljedahl (06:29):
Thanks,
Vanessa.
I think you're great too, andI'm going to correct this great
egregious oversight of notfollowing you on Twitter.
Vanessa Vakharia (06:37):
Oh my God.
This is actually a huge deal.
Are we still recording?
Yes.
Okay.
This is a big moment.
This is a big moment for me.
Thank you so much.
Okay.
There.
I don't even have to say bye.
Right.
We can just end.
Peter Liljedahl (06:49):
Yeah, we can
just end.
David Kochberg (06:50):
No you should
still say goodbye.
Vanessa Vakharia (06:52):
David's gonna
kill me.
Davids gonna kill
David Kochberg (06:54):
You should still
end the, the interview session.
Vanessa Vakharia (06:56):
And on that
note, Peter Liljedahl has
followed me on Twitter,everyone.
I don't know, I, have you?
Have you?
I'm gonna check.
Peter Liljedahl (07:03):
I will, I, I'll
do it right now.
Vanessa Vakharia (07:05):
Bye.
Don't hang up.
Peter Liljedahl (07:08):
I won't hang
up.
Vanessa Vakharia (07:11):
I thought you
said I didn't have to officially
say bye cause I was so weird atit.
Um, um, um, um, okay.
Let's start, I guess.
Deborah Peart (07:23):
Sure.
Vanessa Vakharia (07:23):
Trying to
think now if I wanna start like
this, I am gonna start.
We're just gonna start.
Hello.
Deborah Peart (07:27):
Ok.
Hi!
Vanessa Vakharia (07:28):
Hi.
Oh, and wait, I have to tell youthis because I have huge
insecurities about it.
At the end, I'm gonna say bye,but don't actually hang up and
like, David's alreadyeyerolling, I just am very
awkward about it.
I'm not gonna be awkward.
It's gonna be fine, but like,don't actually hang up at the
end.
Deborah Peart (07:43):
Yes, because then
we talk afterwards and I, we can
say bye, but then stay.
Vanessa Vakharia (07:50):
That's what I
mean.
Yeah.
And I just have a lot of goodbyeanxiety.
Like, like people have mathanxiety.
I have good, I have completionanxiety.
That sounds like something else.
David Kochberg (07:58):
You can practice
a goodbye right now.
Vanessa Vakharia (07:59):
I'm not
practicing a goodbye.
Deborah Peart (08:01):
Well, I typically
expect that we're going stay on
to wrap up.
I promise I won't hang up!
Vanessa Vakharia (08:08):
Okay.
Great, great, great, great,great, great.
Okay.
Deborah we are here.
We have made it.
I, first of all, welcome to thepodcast.
Deborah Peart (08:17):
Thank you.
Glad to be here.
Vanessa Vakharia (08:20):
Okay, great.
Yeah, I have hello and goodbyeanxiety.
Okay, well next time you see me,I will be rocking the
rhinestones.
Thank you so much.
This was the best.
Thanks for being on the pod.
Deborah Peart (08:32):
Thanks for having
me.
This was fun.
Vanessa Vakharia (08:37):
David's face
right now if you could see David
he's just like
David Kochberg (08:40):
You just can't
do it.
Vanessa Vakharia (08:43):
Uh, that was
not bad.
David Kochberg (08:44):
It was not good!
Vanessa Vakharia (08:49):
Oh my god.
David Kochberg (08:50):
You just make it
awkward.
Vanessa Vakharia (08:51):
I don't know
man, I can't Okay Thank you so
much.
This has honestly been ahighlight of my entire life.
I'm not even saying that withhyperbole
Jo Boaler (09:00):
Thank you very much
for having me.
David Kochberg (09:03):
Great.
That's great.
You can stop.
Vanessa Vakharia (09:05):
Yes, we did
it.
Okay.
I've had a rough, I'm sorry.
I don't know how to say goodbye,but I'm getting better at it.
Good.
Just, I just, now I'm picturingwhen she says it that the music
will come up and that's makingit feel more natural to me.
David Kochberg (09:17):
Okay.
All right, that's it.
I hope that you found that asentertaining as I still do, and
I also hope that you willforgive my increasing
frustration with Vanessa overthe course of those recordings.
The wheels are in motion overhere for the next season of Math
Therapy, and in the meantime, asalways, you can reach Vanessa on
social media at TheMathGuru.
Feel free to offer any supportor advice in dealing with her
(09:40):
sudden onset goodbye anxiety.
You can also hit her up if thereare any specific topics that you
want her to explore next season.
As for me, all that's left tosay is, Goodbye.
Now that wasn't so hard, was it?