16.5 Lights, Camera, Spirits Part 2 - "The Special" (NSFW) - Matt and Friends Drink the Universe

Episode Transcript
Available transcripts are automatically generated. Complete accuracy is not guaranteed.
Matt (00:00):
10, 9, 8, 7, 6, 5, 4, 3, 2 , 1.
We have liftoff.
Welcome to Matt and Friends.
Drink the Universe.

(00:21):
Welcome back everybody.
This is going to be part 2 ofour Halloween special Lights
camera spirits.
Alright and post interview withHarrison.

(00:45):
As promised, we are going towatch and react to his movie.

Rob / Chris (00:49):
The Special.
That's right, and I'm stillhere.
Guys, it's Rob.
We've got two other friendsjoining us today.

Siobhan (00:55):
Oh hey, it's Siobhan.

Oh, chris, I'm sorry I spoke over you.
I'm in there, right awayAlright we're coming here from
the podcasting couch.
Yep, and what did Harrison say?

Matt (01:08):
You should watch this one with somebody you hate, wow.

Jerry (from the movie) (01:11):
What Didn't he say that?
Thanks, chris.

Siobhan (01:14):
And you asked us to be part of this.

Matt (01:15):
thanks a lot, I did well, then he clarified like somebody
you don't like from pastrelationship and I said, okay,
okay still jeez.
Also mentioned.
You'll find yourself yelling atthe screen.
Don't stick your dick in thebox.
So.

Siobhan (01:27):
Okay, just get ready, I'm going to say it.

Is that a weird Brad Pitt moment going to come
up?
Not in a home, oh no, oh, thisis in a world, an association
with everything's on firepresents I can't read, I don't
know that you need to read yeah,a saw.

Siobhan (01:46):
Stop.

Matt (01:47):
What you don't like.
That I mean no, Bert.
Running director's commentary.

Would you please look when you reach for the
candy Jesus, that's in my lap.
Whoa.

Siobhan (02:04):
I was just grabbing the fish.
Just grabbing the fish, oh thefish Poor fish isn't even here
Defend himself.

Mike (from the movie) (02:12):
Susan Moses I am.
Paul Cutman.

Matt (02:19):
Rob does some woodworking Works with the wood.

Siobhan (02:24):
He does.

Matt (02:26):
Yeah, you and your wife together, that's great Many
wooden projects.

Very talented work in the wood, thank you.

Siobhan (02:33):
I'm saying nothing.

Man, this guy can screw.
Hey, hey, hey, thank you.
Oh man, we should have timestamped this so people can like
watch it along with us.

Siobhan (02:50):
We might be able to.

They're, they're they're standing in the hole.
They'll hear the dialogue andbe able to mash that up.
Yeah, oh, that's that is true.
I didn't.
I didn't realize that theycould hear what we're hearing,
which makes a lot of sense.

Siobhan (03:05):
It's your first time.

Hey, glad I could have it with you guys.
Oh, oh, and before everythinghappens, be Harrison Smith.
There he is, yeah, directing.
We are drinking the specialcocktail.
Yes, the perp, which is, ofcourse, our grape jello, of
course Infused with oh yes, well, we, we described it earlier,

(03:29):
so grape jello, vanilla sippingvodka and Sprite A floating
gelatinous blob.
And now begins the special.

Couldn't you have to Jerry?
The best revenge is revenge.
Hey, come on, she cheated onyou first right.

So I have to cheat on her.

You know what she's gonna give you, don't
Mom, why she's gonna mistake.
Kindness for weakness, allright, you'll be sending the
wrong message.
That's all right to fuck aroundwithout consequences.
This will even the score.
A healthy relationship is anequal relationship.

Siobhan (04:10):
Yeah, this guy is a douche.

Yeah.
I don't know who am I gonnacheat with Mort?
Don't look at me, guys, you'reon the list.

Siobhan (04:21):
But I'm Jerry.

You're a good guy, mort, with the jokes,
and you're a great husband.
You think so, I know so.

Siobhan (04:29):
Especially if you cheat on your wife.

Matt (04:30):
This dude is the frat guy in the corner that gives you
advice and everybody's likedon't listen to that guy Right
Now.

See, this guy is the special my friend
the special Take a sip everytime they say it what?

For a $5 happy ending.
I could be myself a free Grossplease.

Trust me, it is not what you think.
Before we go, I'm gonna needyou to put this bag on your head
.
Kidding me?

That seems safe.
Don't look like I'm kidding.

Put that on your head or you can forget
it.
Why?
Because I know you well enoughthat, after you have what you're
about to have, you're gonna goback there every single night
until you're broke, and eventhat won't be enough.
So consider this a preventativemeasure, really.

Matt (05:18):
Really Put the bag on.

Come on Okay.
Okay, yeah, dick.

You're gonna love it man.

Matt (05:33):
Okay.

Siobhan (05:35):
Is this the end of the movie?
He's dead now.

He breathed in once and he's dead.

Siobhan (05:40):
Yep, I don't know what he is.

Matt (05:43):
I mean, at least he didn't tie it under the neck there.

I want this to be a Batman film.

Yeah, right, yeah right here I am.

Siobhan (06:00):
United.

All right , my friend, we have arrived.
Can I take this off?
Yeah, take it off.

Where.

Siobhan (06:28):
Also, where do they live that?
He goes there and then he'slike well, I guess I'll never
figure out where this is.

I feel like there's places you could
drive me around like within anhour or a few hours.

Matt (06:42):
I have no idea where I am.

I'm about to drop a pin.

Siobhan (06:49):
Google Maps.

Ladies.

The only one who looks excited is douchey Will
Wheaton.

Oh, I'm definitely getting a little bit
of a oh man.

He's like if Will Wheaton, and what's the guy
that's his?
He's like Picard's right hand.

Siobhan (07:20):
Right here, yeah, like if Will Wheaton and.

Ryker were one person, that's that guy.

Matt (07:28):
That's a lot of glitter.

Like me.

I like you Jerry.

Siobhan (07:47):
I don't believe her.

How does she know?

his name is Jerry.
You have it in your eyes.
He will want the special.
That's what you're for.

She's not the special Her no.
Which one is it then?
Oh, none of these.
I mean, they all seem prettydamn special to me, man.
What do you want?

Oh no, Madam Zora.
Yeah, we're here for thespecial.

Matt (08:25):
What of you?

Oh, not just my buddy here.

Det. Barnes (from the movie (08:29):
His eyes.

Hey, I'm Jerry, she's not deaf what?

Dracula is a special.
Oh hell, no, no.

Matt (08:49):
You don't find me attractive.

Or maybe you like sin or my other dolls
better, Jerry, after fiveminutes you're going to be
forgetting all about Lisa $60now.
Since.
When.

Since the last time.

Matt (09:16):
The inflation baby.

Look, this is the color of the drink.
I know, yeah, there's nobody inhere.

Siobhan (09:24):
It's special.

Matt (09:26):
Nailed it Boom oh.

Siobhan (09:42):
What the fuck Strap in, jerry?
Ooh, those curtains.
These are special, all rightwell.

Matt (09:54):
Anybody want to read the box out loud?

Siobhan (09:55):
Stick it in here.

Matt (09:57):
There we go.
He seems confused about theinstructions.

Siobhan (10:13):
I'm like, sir.
I mean fair enough, though ifyou were about to do that, you
probably want to know whatyou're getting into.
I like that.
There's a bed in there.

No, it's in, Mike.
That's some kind of joke.

Siobhan (10:43):
I like this noir music.
We're in a detective.

I was just going to say that.

Siobhan (10:49):
See, I saw her across the room.
She said stick it in here.

She said put it in the box and I said ma'am, I'm
not here for that.
Me and my pencil mustache willtake my business elsewhere.

You know what they say you went in Rome,
right?

All right , I like this room.
I feel like he's going to die.

Siobhan (11:18):
I hope so.
Oh my God, I definitely am.

Matt (11:20):
Shame you don't have it A little handsy.
Oh, I got it.

Believe me, I'm going to bring it A few
times apparently.

Not ominous at all.

Siobhan (11:33):
Right.

Nope, come on, we'll write it.

Hello, hello, wow of.

I mean, I'm not doing a box.
Why do you need to adjust?

Siobhan (12:28):
so intrigued.

Matt (12:31):
It does seem like a lot of pelvic adjustment like that
he's laughing now like it's likedown and down and out.

Oh, oh, everybody take a slur.
Sounds like our cocktail.
Everybody's like the specialtip.

Siobhan (12:45):
Oh.

What.

Oh.

Siobhan (13:13):
Jerry has found the special.
That was three and a halfseconds.
Well, no wonder there's a bed.

Got it Post special coma relaxation yeah.

Siobhan (13:29):
I guess, my god, her programs.
What do you think that shewatches?

Generals of our lives right, there you go.

Siobhan (13:38):
Soaps for sure.
Is that time of night be great,as she wore watch telenovelas.

Oh telenova.

Siobhan (13:51):
Are you oh?

Mike, yeah, jerry, jerry Mike.
Amen.

Matt (14:03):
He needs to reevaluate his choice and friends, his friend.

Mike.

Siobhan (14:09):
Mike Riker.

Me see what you guys get paid for.

But oh, there's a, stick your tongue out.

Siobhan (14:22):
DNA, oh no.

There you go.

Siobhan (14:27):
I like that.
He's grossed out and all he hadto do was put his belt on.

Matt (14:32):
Judging from the hand motions.

Siobhan (14:33):
I think he was assisting on a return to sender
situation.
Yeah, you stuck it in gottastick it back in.

Matt (14:41):
He's out cold being hugged by a large Russian man.

Don't bring this one back.
Tell him to not return.
He has won that once.
Okay, what he just wanted thatonce she doesn't want another 60
dollars.
Didn't I tell you hey, just betransparent.

(15:11):
I didn't have to hold on toyour penis while we lifted you
in the car.
I've had one of those like fourhour Viagra boners.

Siobhan (15:22):
I like that.
He didn't know that, he didn'tknow how he was breathing, but
he's like you got one of themfour hour Viagra boners, like
he's observant.
Look at that.

Matt (15:33):
Can't that happen post mortem I thought, that was a
thing that can happen postmortem.

Siobhan (15:40):
Like a rig of mortis rig of mortis situation.

Matt (15:42):
Yeah, rig of moaner.

Siobhan (15:43):
I mean I'd.

I'd Rigorrection.
Rigorrection guys, I feel likewe're missing really key
elements of the plot here.
That's sick.
You fucking with a bar, oh mygod hey you good boy on such a
mistake Next time.

All right , she's a great follower, I'm
trust once a week.
Fuck the bar.
I need this man hey, hey, hey,hey, baby steps, baby steps,
we'll see.

Siobhan (16:24):
We're even and you must be.
Lisa like Lisa.

Motel Manager (from th (16:30):
Drinking with Mike again.

How'd you find out about Anyway?
you know, drunk friend, of afriend type of thing, you know
there must be a pretty goodcustomer, because then one day
that old lady, she offered methe special.
I did it once.
Once is enough.
Why is this?
Some kind of rule or something?

(16:58):
Talk to sin, she knows, once isenough.
Thanks, man.
That's what I do For thesupport.

Siobhan (17:14):
He shoves, takes back in pants.
We square.

Yeah, but he does a good time with the
france.

Matt (17:19):
All I can hear is the song guy love from scrubs, mm-hmm.

Hey, don't forget the Ryerson files.

Yeah, I'm cool, thanks I think I'm
just gonna go to sleep.

Siobhan (17:38):
I'm pregnant, jury oh what.

Plot twist Are you serious?
You had me at hello.
I thought I thought.

Mike, you're swim or swim, tee hee.

Siobhan (17:54):
Let's get Maury Povich in, you sure it's mine, oh.
Damn Cold brother.

I'm not feeling really well and I'm too
shocked.
I mean, this is, this is bignews.

Siobhan (18:15):
Oh good, Are you going to hug her?
That's going to be so awkward.

Det. Barnes (from the movi (18:18):
He's right.

Matt (18:21):
Awkward.
He's already off the cliff, man.

You like that side boob?

Oh.

Motel Manager (from the mo (19:08):
Good morning, Jerry.
You need to see these newpictures Bye Trudy.

Siobhan (19:13):
No, what office is this ?

You didn't after you got home.

What is this white suit?

Siobhan (19:35):
I know it's Miami Vice.

She told me she's pregnant, what?
And she said I was having somekind of wet dream last night.
Apparently I was saying someshit in my sleep.
So she flat-out asked me thismorning if I fucked someone else
, fair enough.
And then she told me that shebought me a snowblower for my
birthday, and the guy that she'sbeen going to see down to

(19:59):
shopping center that it text isa goddamn fucking salesman, mike
.

And you're buying that, who takes?

a snowblower?
No, mike, I mean, she's my wifeand I trust her, and now I
cheat on her because I listen toyou.

Matt (20:16):
That seems like it was a horrible idea.

Don't blame me.

We knew what the fuck we were doing,
jerry.

I might give you a little piece of
wisdom here.
Okay, forget it, ever happened.

Hey, the whole thing was a wet dream.
Yeah, I mean, it's not like itwas real pussy.

Siobhan (20:43):
It wasn't.
It's in a box, dude.
What did you think it was?

It was a flush slice, jacking off the
corn.

Is that cheating?
That's a little above my paygrade, but just forget it ever
happened.

Siobhan (20:54):
What does this man?
Do he's not a doctor.

I think there are failures.

Siobhan (20:58):
He's talking about screwing a box is above his pay
grade.

I said never happen.
I said forget it, I'm goingwith salesman.
Yeah but you did.

You've watched this .
Do you know what they are?
I have no idea.

Siobhan (21:17):
Good, well, that's good .

He's Rachel's.
He's wearing sunglasses at work.
He's my sherry.
Mystic wonder on that computerHer whore, everybody want candy.

(21:40):
Good, thank you.

You have reached mystic wonder.

Siobhan (21:59):
Girl.
What isn't she a psychic?
Is she allowed to haveunforeseen circumstances?
If she's a psychic, this is nother whole job.
She's supposed to see all thecircumstances.

Anybody catch that goat photo?

Siobhan (22:12):
The client's called about tomorrow's meeting.

Lunch.

Siobhan (22:16):
It's a little early for lunch, isn't it?
What do you want me to tell theclients?
Tell them I'm going to lunch.

Is Mike going with you?

Siobhan (22:24):
You fucking see, mike.

Oh, okay .

Siobhan (22:29):
That's good.
This guy's kind of a douche too.

Matt (22:32):
Maybe it's not all on Mike 180.

Really yeah, that's a sick RBG poster Right next to

(23:05):
a poster for the documentary ofa man who climbed the Wall Free
, solo Alex Honnold.

Siobhan (23:20):
This man has the rage.

I'll be right with you.
Yeah, I'm on my lunch break.
I don't have a lot of time,Then please sit down.
Can you just tell me where tofind Madame Zora?

I don't know who you're talking about.

You're a psychic and you can't find
another psychic.

Siobhan (23:38):
Don't think that's how that works.

Randy Bells Morticia.

Siobhan (23:44):
Yeah, sounds like she really wants to help you when
you insult her.

Matt (23:47):
Right.

Siobhan (23:48):
Also, do you think it's like Professor X, where he can
see all the mutants in the worldand he goes into that thing.
Like do you think that's whatpsychics have, the like thing
where they go inside?
Yeah, that cocktail's a time.

I have it.

Siobhan (24:00):
Did you just like throw your faces for her?

No, no, no.
I was just laughing at the factthat you're bringing up
Professor X and Suri Bro.

Siobhan (24:07):
Yeah, well, that's it.
Isn't that what it's like?
He's like all right, you're apsycho, you don't know where
other psychics are.
No, no, no wait.

I'm here for the special Sin is not here
.
No, no sin.

Uh, the special.

I seem to remember you, your eyes I
don't, I don't.

Det. Barnes (from the movie) (24:52):
I love you.
I was just waiting for that.

Siobhan (24:54):
Yep, You're my best friend.
I'm like waiting for him to do.
He's like what if I stick myfinger in it and my toe what I'm

(25:18):
not so sure?
I'd want to know at this point.

Matt (25:23):
So sure I'd put my eye that close to the hole.

Yeah, right yeah.

Siobhan (25:33):
Yeah X.
Do we have guesses about what'sin here?
Oh, Do you have a guess, Chris?

I don't know Okay.

Matt (26:08):
Some aggressive knockings.

No, no, no, no, no, no no.

Siobhan (26:16):
I don't know what just happened.
What?

The box hit.

Siobhan (26:21):
Oh, no, girl oh.

Is this the slow death?
Is she in the box.
Now Something about her box.

Siobhan (26:35):
I'm so, did he.

Matt (26:37):
Angu Wachter was the box.

Siobhan (26:41):
Don't help her, though it's cool.

Matt (26:44):
Oh no, that's the opposite of helping.

Whoa, you made me do this.

Just got real dark, real fast.

Siobhan (26:56):
We about to American history access lady.

Oh.

Matt (27:04):
Could?
It was on the crunching soundthere, Harrison.

Siobhan (27:06):
Yeah, some Foley artistry.
Love me for some fresh tracheasounds.

I did this for you box.

Siobhan (27:16):
Cause you and me are buddies now.

Matt (27:18):
Looking in the mirror questioning his recent choices.
She's very dead.

Siobhan (27:25):
Well, I bet that woman who's trying to find her through
the psychic network is notgoing to be able to find her for
sure now Beep beep, beep.

It's called a horribro hey.

Siobhan (27:35):
There you go, took a bit, we got there.

Sometimes I just need to think.

Uh-oh.

Siobhan (27:59):
That parking is only a dollar.
That's amazing.

I don't know where they are Is that a chain mail
sweater Looks like it.
Oh my God, did he go to fiveguys.
Is that a broken-out?

Matt (28:09):
part.

Are they leaders?
What a scarf, though.

Siobhan (28:22):
I know he's very committed to it too.
Oh my God, your hands are dirtyagain.

Hey.

Motel Manager (from the mov (29:32):
Hey .

Just use my card.

Siobhan (29:45):
He spent his last hundred and twenty on the
special the place is real big onMiller Light All right.

Yeah , I'm going to go upstairs.
Second door on the left.
I got a couple simple rules uphere.

Siobhan (30:11):
Yeah, that's a good one .

Yeah , get in the toilet, clean up
your mess on the bed or whereveryou make it.
Don't leave that shit for me.
And when you return the key,you don't bring it down here,
you bring it upstairs to me, gotit?
Yeah, hey.

Siobhan (30:26):
Sounds lovely.

When you leave, take the body with
you.

What my?

favorite character so far.

Siobhan (30:42):
Yeah, for sure.

Bartender Guy who accepts snuffs Box.
It's our first home.
We're home.
What do you want?

to do.

Siobhan (30:55):
Let me carry you over the threshold.

What should we get for?

dinner box.

Siobhan (31:04):
How are they going to watch that TV?
That's fair.

Matt (31:07):
Six feet near on top of us On the side of the bed.

Yeah, it's at the perfect angle if he just turns
the box to the right, then hecan just look up to his left
while he's in the midst ofboxing.

He's just going to look at it.

Oh, that's a good one.
He's just going to look at it.
I killed for you Box.
It's you and me forever.

Siobhan (31:33):
Forever and ever, and at least six more nights.

He's going to cut a hole in the back of it too.
Oh my God, Just to make it feeldirtier On the bed.

Siobhan (31:52):
It's time, I swear to God, if we have to hear this
noise again.

Oh, prepare oh.

Siobhan (32:05):
Yeah, it's longer than your lunch break, son.

Matt (32:09):
He's been on lunch for like four and a half hours, oh.

Oh, no what.

Siobhan (32:19):
I like that.

It matters that he can't just put
it on.

Siobhan (32:23):
Don't look anymore Box.

No one.

Siobhan (32:27):
You hush up and I'll be back soon no one can have you,
but me Box.

That's good, I like that we decided to use this
voice.

Siobhan (32:35):
Excuse me, sir, you're the new guest here.

Yeah, I am.
Why Do you want the room clean?
No, I don't need anything.
Don't worry about it.
Don't change the tiles, Don'tchange the bed.

Just don't come in here for any
reason.
No, nothing, nada.
Just stay out of the room, okay, Okay.

I'll stay out while you're there.

Oh, my God, you don't go in there for
any reason.
Not when I'm here, not when I'mnot here.
What the fuck is so hard aboutthat?

Okay, okay, I'll stay out that a girl.

He is off the wheels.

Siobhan (33:09):
Dude, Come on in please .
I'm surprised that guy hired acleaner, though.

He's okay .

That is also shocking, we're your
employees.

It's just me, and.

Det. Barnes (from the m (33:25):
Madonna , and how long have you worked
for her?
I'm sorry, what's her real nameagain?
Anya Grubinski.
I have been with Madonna allthese.
I've been with her for a fewyears, security and maintenance.

(33:48):
Really, it's enough riffraffand a fortune teller joint to
have a guy like you as a bouncer.
Okay, this place has a smell.
You know when you were doingthis for a while you can almost
be blind and know where you are.
Yeah, locker rooms have theirown smell, bowling alleys, strip

(34:10):
clubs why does he have all thepheromones, did you?

know that .
Tell me detective Rose droppingknowledge what?

is it that you smell Tea,
cigarettes Pussy?

Oh shit.
I tell you already.
I go to the store and she knowsDo not let anyone in until
Yvonne returns.

But she does not listen, anything
else I do not know.

And you have no idea who could have
done this.

I am Nazi psychic.

Siobhan (34:58):
Fair enough.

Kimo Zabi .
No, where were you?
What do you mean?
Lunch.
I came by, you were alreadygone.
I just felt like being alone,without all of mine.
If you have not guessed, thatis all.
Yeah, mike, that is all.
All right, you know no hardfeelings.

(35:23):
Nope, I have forgotten already.
Really.
Is that what you said I shoulddo?
Yeah, but I did not think youactually would.
Yeah, well I am.
I have to make things rightwith Lisa and hopefully in a
week or two everything will beback to normal Good place to
start.
Do you want to hit Mort's afterwork tonight?

(35:43):
No, I can't.
I made reservations with Lisaat Chang's.

Have fun .

So where is your drinking buddy tonight?
Ah, with the wife, where youshould be.
Oh, when are you going to getmarried, man?

Oh.

Come on, mort.
You know I am not the marriedtype.
In fact, I don't even thinkhumans are meant to be
monogamous.
You know, males are wired tospread their seed.
Ah, he is that guy.

Siobhan (36:15):
Yeah, I am not chick, she just gave him a look.

Well, maybe I should have been a
farmer.
Huh yeah, Maybe you should haveyou okay with that.
I need another.

Siobhan (36:24):
I am fine, he is like an entire beer.
You need another beer.
Oh my God box.

We are having different experiences now.

Siobhan (36:34):
Well, I mean, it would evolve.

Matt (36:35):
You hope right, I am pretty sure the outcome is the
same.
He is going to go buy a littlesquare wedding dress.

Siobhan (36:55):
Yeah.

Matt (36:56):
Oh.

Siobhan (37:03):
That will bring you down real quick, huh I guess he
can see the TV.

Foul play is suspected.

Siobhan (37:18):
Reporting from downtown .
You don't know where that is,but downtown.

Matt (37:27):
Right near Madame Zoris.

Siobhan (37:28):
Oh, oh, yeah, right, he knows he dropped the pin.

Matt (37:37):
Some people just can't follow instructions.
They need to know more.

Oh, oh, we are going in.
Oh, we are three fingers at allat once.
Why don't you start with one,work your way up to three?

Siobhan (37:48):
That doesn't.

Oh oh no, there's noises.

Oh God.

Siobhan (38:01):
No.

Oh, oh.

Siobhan (38:20):
I don't understand what he's.
If you don't understand, Idefinitely don't understand.

He removed a bit of blob, is it?

burning.

The goo makes it feel good.
Oh oh, it looked.
It looked unpleasant.

Siobhan (38:40):
Oh, oh, that is that I can't tell.
I feel like that took like 10seconds.

That's how good the box is.

Matt (38:53):
I mean, I clearly feel like he clearly hasn't
demonstrated a penchant forstamina up until this point in
the movie there's a refractoryperiod.

Siobhan (38:59):
Friends, Look that up.

Must get more goo.

Matt (39:05):
We'll put a link to that down below now.

Siobhan (39:09):
The goo or Rob decided too much goo.
For the record, he's having amoment.

Matt (39:19):
Thank you for not launching that all over the
living room.

Siobhan (39:23):
That's a nice carpet.
Oh, oh God.

Why is?

Matt (39:33):
making it into go bottle.

Siobhan (39:35):
Okay, I'm gonna lose it .
What is that book?
It's filled milk, it looksreally uplifting, especially
when she's pregnant.

It's about breastfeeding Upside down.

Hey, how'd it go.

Had what go.

The reason you're late the meeting
with Mr Ryerson.
You called him up.

Oh yeah.

I'm fine.

Motel Manager (from the movi (40:14):
Is that really where you were?

What do you mean?

You were now drinking with Mike or
someone else.

We talked about this, remember we're good
.

Siobhan (40:31):
Remember Are we cherry?

Matt (40:38):
No, I'm at a box.

I'm not feeling well.

Siobhan (40:41):
She's got magic goo.
I'm leaving you Bye.

I called her boxan, boxan.

Matt (40:51):
Is that a filled with Satan silly buddy.

Siobhan (40:57):
We had.
After that scene, I'm trying todrink this drink and I cannot.
It's gonna freak me out.

You're not doing well with the goo.
Oh, there's more goo, damn it.

Siobhan (41:06):
Did you just go in there room and do this
Apparently?
Oh God, what are you doing?

I thought you were watching a show
.
She watched General Hospitalnight too, I was just getting
ready to come out and surpriseyou.

Siobhan (41:25):
Surprise, surprise, surprise.
Like what, like what?
Why are?

you gooing.

They just wrestling .
Is he gonna kill her now?
I really, oh box, it's not thesame.

I'm just gonna put a box on your head.
Don't worry about it.

I justwhat Think square thoughts Fucking coffee
oh my God, that's so gross.

I'm gonna go in there room and do this.
I'm gonna go in there room anddo this.
Square thoughts.

Siobhan (42:18):
Fucking coffee, oh my God, that was so great.
Fucking coffee.
Look at that fish.

I thought it was a billy pass.
You remember those?
Oh yeah, Yep.

Siobhan (42:32):
Take me to the river.

I got fucking coffee.

I'd rather cut in my mornings on the
weekends, you know I'll talk toyou later.

Siobhan (42:53):
What is happening?

I'm so clever.

Siobhan (42:59):
Nobody knows, at least Val Lisa.
Look at him skipping.

This is Mike.

Hi Mike, lisa, Sorry to bother you
at work, but I was wondering ifI could talk to you about Jerry
.

Okay, what about?

Does he seem like himself to you
lately?

Uh, how do you mean I?

Motel Manager (from the m (43:57):
don't know.
It's just that he treated melike a one-night stand this
morning.

It's likehe couldn't get out of here
quick enough.

Motel Manager (from the (44:04):
Morning Mr.

Hartford, no Frank.

It's a great fucking morning no.

Do you think he's cheating Mike?

No, it's a gootastic morning you know, if
he is, he hasn't told me aboutit.

You're late again, not anymore.
I need to know if this is anaffair.

Matt (44:27):
If you see or hear anything suspicious will you let
me know?

Yeah , of course.

No, he's not.

Siobhan (44:33):
No, he won't.

Matt (44:38):
That's your best option for friend to call you in a
problem.

Siobhan (44:41):
Yeah, really Jeez, you're like shit.

That my least you're talking to.

Actually it was, and you know why she
called.
She thinks you're having anaffair, are you?
Am.
I what.

Just because you want to fuck my wife
doesn't mean you can talk toher behind my back.
Hey, she called me.
Next time don't answer.

Siobhan (45:08):
This is moving so normally for me.
Like what oh?

Oh, no, oh.

Siobhan (45:20):
Oh God, oh she about to have.

Oh.

Siobhan (45:26):
That's a nice manicure.
Oh girl, we about to see blood,aren't we?
I'm gonna be sad.

Oh.

So you've come to tell me that you
found.
What did this?

Matt (45:45):
That's traumatizing.

That was a word park.
This time I know what I heard.
You've been doing in search ofyour own.

But you found something.

What we found is a lot of things
that can't be traced back toanyone with a record.
I'm actually here because I'mwondering if whoever did this
took more than your boss, myboss, madam.

Nothing was taken but Madame's life.

Siobhan (46:12):
You trying to protect the box.

You have something stuck in your
tooth, like if it's a popcorn,maybe stuck in your teeth way
back here, no matter how muchyou pick at it and won't come
out.
You ever had that happen, Ifloss.

In Mother.

Det. Barnes (from the mo (46:30):
Russia .

Perfect.

Det. Barnes (from the mov (46:32):
Teeth floss you.
You don't seem very concernedwith whether or not we find
whoever did this to MissKravinsky.
In fact, it's almost as if youdon't want us to catch this
person.

Siobhan (46:42):
I feel like that's not what's happening at all.

I am said something that's stuck in your
tooth.

Det. Barnes (from the m (46:48):
Exactly , exactly.

Americans have a saying what goes around
comes around.

Motel Manager (from the movie (46:58):
I think whoever did this will get
what they deserve.

Det. Barnes (from the mo (47:06):
What's of a cult book, Sierra Yvonne.

Is that?

Matt (47:09):
a book literally called Korea Cult I sure is he made a
quite good assumption.

I must have heard of a curse on someone
.

Madame did that for free.
I wish I had her powers.
What curse in Madame did this.
So it was a man.

I assume so yes, well, yvonne, why
would a man frequent a fortunetell her, let alone kill one?

Men want to know things too.

Some things are wrong.

Yeah , you know I find a lot wrong
actually what was on his tableagain.

Siobhan (47:51):
He was looking at the man in the mirror.

A box, a life working with a woman.
Box for what?

For putting things in.
And where is this box Penises,these missings?

He said nobody took anything else?

Siobhan (48:11):
Oh, there it is, there's the box.

Has he got it under ?

Siobhan (48:17):
the covers now?
I don't think so.

Oh, no, okay, I don't know why there are covers.

Siobhan (48:23):
How are the covers in between what it's?
Because we're not watching aporn.
That's why, so we don't get aglimpse.

What eat ?

It's not the same.

Siobhan (48:39):
It's not the same, no, the same.
No.
Box is mad at him.
Oh, no, Doctor there seems tobe a burning sensation.
Oh yeah, bummer, and I don'tfeel bad for you, oh God.

Yeah, trudy, this is Jerry.
Can you tell him?
Sir Roth, I'm not going to makeback in today.
I'm really sick.

Siobhan (49:18):
Brian, the doctor will see you now Shit.

Yeah, sorry, they're calling me in
Mm-hmm, mm-hmm.

Matt (49:24):
Yeah, God.

Siobhan (49:26):
Oh.

Matt (49:27):
So you're married.

Yes .

Matt (49:29):
You and your wife having more sex than usual.

No less than usual, actually.
Ow, sorry, he's got boxburn.
You having sex with anyoneother than your wife.
No, you sure, unless I'm sleepfucking no oh the hell are all
these splinters Doc?

Matt (49:46):
I can't help if you're not alone you having sex with
anyone else no.

So you're masturbating more than
usual, unless I'm using a cheesegrater.
I mean, look at this, it'sspreading.
I mean it comes and goes, it'sall in my fucking dick, man.
I mean, what is this?

Matt (50:04):
I don't know what.
I'll tell you what, Mr Smith.
This guy's good.
Whatever it is that your penisand you are doing, just do it
less often.
Okay, I'm going to write you aprescription for some LNX
ointment.
Go ahead and put that on acouple times a day, see if that
works.

Siobhan (50:24):
I like his little.
Hmm, Remember the ointment.
What a good doctor.

Jesus, my penis burns I want the large tube.

Matt (50:37):
Just a minute.

I wish that there was like narration during some
parts of this, you got a messagefrom here, from like someone
with a very specific type ofvoice, morgan.
Freeman Hmm, what was that day?
He really?

loved that box.

His penis has fallen off.
Yeah, just rubbing on my dickright, oh Fuck.
Oh, does it hurt that bad?

Siobhan (51:03):
This guy seems like a good guy, I'm going to go get
him.
Does it hurt that bad this guyseems?

like a fucking wuss .
It looks like he has splinters.

Siobhan (51:13):
Is it?
It looks like hair.
It's not been kind.
Yeah, well, that's what.

It looks like he's getting stone skin from Game of
Thrones oh.

Yeah.

I like that.
You had to like look beneaththe microphones.

Siobhan (51:27):
Got the scale, the gray scale.

Gray scale.
I got you.

Siobhan (51:37):
I'm scared, jerry.
Here we go, oh please.
I made bad decisions.

(52:02):
I made bad decisions.

Matt (52:05):
I made bad decisions, I made bad decisions, I made bad
decisions and I think it's goingto fall off.

Siobhan (52:13):
Jerry, no one feels bad .
What are you doing?

No, I'm sick.

Siobhan (52:19):
It's like, oh God, you're going to be a nightmare.

You don't feel hot?

I'm going to say that again.

Siobhan (52:28):
Is there anything I can do to help?

No, I think I'm just going to try to
sleep it off.
I got to get to work tomorrow.

Siobhan (52:36):
You get rid of a rash right.
You sleep it off.

What kind of sick are you?

Oh no, blue sick, gold sick why?

Dick rot sick.

Siobhan (52:52):
Gray scale.

Motel Manager (from the movie (52:54):
I think I'm miscarried.

Siobhan (52:56):
Me and Shireen.

Did you hear me?
I heard you.

Matt (53:04):
One redeeming chance to say something heartfelt.

Sorry.

You're sorry, that's it what is this
going?

I hate this man yeah.

I know right.

Yep.

Siobhan (53:23):
If he could just get gray scale on his whole body and
suffocate, that'd be cool.

I don't want a VD, if that's your asking
, because, again, I am notcheating on you.

Please, please, we could try again.

We will, we will.

Please, can I just get some sleep please
?

Thanks, jerry, just wants some sleep.
Oh my God, his eyes.

Matt (54:13):
He know he's not feeling well, he looks rough.
He's left the box alone.

Siobhan (54:16):
Yeah, really.
Well, he has to.

Matt (54:25):
Do you look green?
Or is it just me?
Yeah, okay, hey, I saw green,the color of the blind guy saw
green.

Siobhan (54:30):
Oh good job.
Oh my, oh Lanta.

Oh, he definitely has the gray scale.

Siobhan (54:39):
That's oh yeah, aired out.
She's about to be like youdon't have an STI.

Matt (54:45):
Samuel Tarly.
What Paging Samuel Tarly?

Siobhan (54:49):
Did you ride on asphalt with your stomach?

Has it not been more than?

Siobhan (55:12):
six days?
Oh, I don't think so.
Has it only been like?

Matt (55:15):
two or three or four, yeah , at the most.

Siobhan (55:18):
Oh, he covered it again .
I feel like that was I stillhear box.

I missed you.

Siobhan (55:24):
That woman's going to come in and be like.
I dusted it for you, sir westill haven't learned Right.

Right.

Siobhan (55:41):
He pulls out a sign it's like be back soon.

It's empty.
We'll return at 12.
No, no, no, no oh shit.

Matt (56:05):
Unplug it and plug it back in again.

Siobhan (56:06):
Maybe it's that time of the month, so what's hiding?

How in the world has he not thought to cut this
lock off yet?

Siobhan (56:13):
Honestly, this, that is blowing my mind.

Sir, you can get bolt cutters yeah foreshadowing
the plumbing and heatingsupplies stores closed.
Please break it.

Siobhan (56:27):
So where are they?
That there's like this type ofstore?
Does he not know how to use a?

Matt (56:32):
door.
He's now uptown.

Oh fancy Uptown Jerry Looking for a set of wire
cutters, bolt cutters.
Yeah, do you have a settlingtorch, sir?

Matt (56:48):
I mean, there's a couple ways you can attack this problem
.

Siobhan (56:51):
Yeah, he's going to walk in and punch someone in the
head.

Matt (56:54):
Plumbing supply hoses are not one of those ways.
Yeah, yeah.

I'm looking for a I don't know what
to call it.
Yeah, I need to cut a lock.

Like bolt cutters.

Siobhan (57:08):
We've been saying it this whole time, Jerry.

All of the subtext of the clerk.
Clerk, you fucking idiot.
You know, I'm looking for athing that cuts a bolt.
Oh, like a bolt cutter.

Sir.

Matt (57:25):
The clerk's like we got another one.
He's going to be on the newstomorrow.

Comes back with a police officer.

Yeah, how big is the lock?
These should work fine.

Yeah, they're used, is that okay?
Yeah, that's fine, that'll work.

Siobhan (57:49):
I've definitely been using a used thing this whole
time, in fact.

And empty.

Siobhan (57:57):
Yeah, I mean, you just established that.

It's an empty box.
What could it be?
A box full of nothing for youand me.

Siobhan (58:10):
Oh God, it's a bunch of jizz.

Yeah, trudy, it's Jerry.
Thanks, yeah, but I'm afraidI'm still not feeling so well.
So, yeah, okay, trudy, okayTrudy, yeah, I will, all right,
okay.

Siobhan (58:24):
Did it die?
Is it a gnome?

(58:54):
Why is he saying shh no, is ita baby Ew?

What.

Siobhan (59:16):
Oh, you got the dead.
Thing.

Matt (59:25):
It's the squishing sounds that are by Frith and Wurst.

Siobhan (59:28):
So it shriveled to the back of the box Is that what we
think?
And he opened it up, and now hegrabbed it out.

And he's not working with enough to get to
the back of the box apparently.

Siobhan (59:36):
No, he does have the scale.
Oh, thank God, I'm so scared Idon't even know.

Oh God, when do we see it?

Siobhan (59:49):
So it's like a floating vagina.

Can we see it?
It's.

Siobhan (59:55):
Okay, he has the burning the cigarette burns.

Matt (01:00:00):
What I do believe.
He does indeed have the plague.

Jerry (from the movie) (01:00:03):
Yeah.

Matt (01:00:04):
Or Ebola, one of the two.

Siobhan (01:00:06):
The goop?
Oh, that's shit.
It looks like it's doing realgood work for you, sir.

Matt (01:00:19):
It might require a steroidal cream.

Siobhan (01:00:22):
I mean it is a prescription, right.
I don't think I was knowingthis was going to be such an
allegory, this movie Onaddiction it really is.

Matt (01:00:33):
That is one of the stated themes.

Rob / Chris (01:00:34):
Here's our credit card statement.
Oh, god oh my God, I'm genius,nailed it.
Also.
Why are we talking aboutclimate change?
What you said, something aboutAl Gore.

Siobhan (01:00:44):
No, I said allegory.

Rob / Chris (01:00:47):
Okay.

Siobhan (01:00:49):
That's the inconvenient truth right there, and I said
allegory.

Motel Manager (from the mo (01:00:57):
What do you mean?

Rob / Chris (01:00:58):
He's not at work, he called in sick, I'm going to
hang up on this.
Oh my girl.

Siobhan (01:01:06):
Small town Whoville.

Rob / Chris (01:01:08):
One thing is in focus.

Siobhan (01:01:10):
He went to Whoville.

Matt (01:01:12):
Went to Whoville.

Siobhan (01:01:13):
Yeah, that one of those things that said Whoville US I
don't know where that is.
That was very ominous for herjust getting into her car to
leave.
It's all the roundups, faultMonsanto, blame them.

Matt (01:01:30):
Talk about climate change, I mean whatever this guy does
for a living, I'm still stuck onthat Like he's got to be doing.
Well, she's driving, alexis.

Rob / Chris (01:01:39):
So really nice house.
Yeah, do they.
Did you see that kitchenearlier?
I would cook there.

Siobhan (01:01:50):
They're clearly not impoverished.
Well, it must be cheap to livein Whoville.
As long as you don't encounterthe Grinch, I feel like you're
all set.

Matt (01:02:04):
You're horton here as a whore, Rob.
If we were smart, we would haveasked Harrison where this was
filmed.

Siobhan (01:02:10):
I think it was filmed in Lancaster.
Yeah, yeah, I think I readsomewhere it has a Pennsylvania
vibe for sure, I think it's likecentral PA-ish.

Matt (01:02:19):
Actually that bar with the yingling tap handle right in
the middle.

Siobhan (01:02:21):
All these homes make me think of Amish Country.

It could also be Ohio.
I feel so bad for her, true.

Matt (01:02:28):
I just functionally feel awful for her.
Oh God, this woman's seen somuch shit.

Siobhan (01:02:31):
Oh my God, there's a lady in the room.

Matt (01:02:33):
There's a lady in the room .
We got another one.

Siobhan (01:02:38):
That seemed useful.
I told you not to clean it.
Oh, look at her, I like her.

Matt (01:02:46):
And why not, what A lot of people have been missing the
session.

Siobhan (01:02:51):
Yeah, Jerry Lisa.

Lisa Lisa.

Mike (from the movie) (01:02:59):
Lisa.

What do you think?

Matt (01:03:02):
Open the door.

Wait a minute Now, Jerry.

Matt (01:03:08):
My box isn't decent.
Hold on, I didn't want you tofind out this way.
Put her lid on.

Rob / Chris (01:03:14):
This is boxing.

Siobhan (01:03:16):
Yep, she's squishy but I love her.

Motel Manager (from the m (01:03:20):
Jesus Christ, it stinks in here.
It's an old room.

Bogdan has a very potent perfume.

Siobhan (01:03:33):
Smells like Is it her?
Oh, oh.

Motel Manager (from the movi (01:03:40):
Is the girl you're cheating on me
with?
I hope it's the girl.

She's she's pansexual.

Motel Manager (from the (01:03:48):
You're gonna deny it, even though I
caught you, you're pathetic.

Where is she?

Rob / Chris (01:03:57):
I've been fucking my cherry back up.

Siobhan (01:03:58):
I'm trying to figure out what they're saying in the
background.

Rob / Chris (01:04:01):
He's watching a show about addiction, oh.

Siobhan (01:04:04):
I wonder why.

How could you Jerry?

Siobhan (01:04:08):
How could you?
God, it's not killer, oh my god, he might no.

Motel Manager (from the mov (01:04:14):
Get off me oh.

Oh, hell yeah, Right in the dick rod.

Siobhan (01:04:18):
Right in the scaly dick .

Rob / Chris (01:04:22):
There's no girl, there's just oh oh okay, Wait it
ble-, it breathed.

Oh.

Siobhan (01:04:30):
Jesus, oh no, does he have a knife?

Rob / Chris (01:04:34):
Or is he just strangling her?
Okay, yeah, right in the dickrod.
Yeah girl, get in the dickagain.
Woo, get that girl.

I'm healing you in the dick.

Siobhan (01:04:42):
Oh my god, you're gonna kill your wife.
Jesus, this man, boxzan, is ahell of a drug.
She's dead.
Sir, you don't have to be inthe box tonight.
He will sell it's like an alienthing.
That was weird looking.

Matt (01:05:06):
I don't know why it's moving.
A goo ball.
We did good, though thecocktail looks pretty spot on.

Siobhan (01:05:12):
I'm glad I finished it cause-.

Rob / Chris (01:05:15):
I made it based upon what it looked like on the
poster.

Siobhan (01:05:17):
Yeah.

Rob / Chris (01:05:21):
I love you Lisa.

Siobhan (01:05:31):
Good night, Lisa.

Rob / Chris (01:05:33):
Lisa, I'm going to combine you with Boxzan.

Siobhan (01:05:36):
You will be in Lisa's box.

Matt (01:05:44):
Lisa.

Oh, I did this for you.

Siobhan (01:05:47):
Oh.

What the fuck is he?

Siobhan (01:05:51):
doing.
Look at his face my precious.
I did this for you.

What.

You're not allowed to look, Lisa.

Siobhan (01:06:05):
He's too beautiful.
Oh, so you're psychotic now.

Rob / Chris (01:06:22):
Oh no.

Siobhan (01:06:22):
I'm horrified, oh no.
This is the worst part this isthe scariest part of this movie
right here, oh no.

Rob / Chris (01:06:32):
Oh, not what I thought he was going for.
It's not over yet.
Watch me do it.

Siobhan (01:06:37):
Lisa.

Rob / Chris (01:06:43):
Hold my hand.
Oh my god, hell yeah.

Oh no.

Siobhan (01:06:47):
I did not see it no, no oh oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh
oh.
Oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh,oh, oh, oh, oh oh oh, oh, oh oh
, Interesting choice.
Oh, oh, oh, oh, oh.

(01:07:31):
What are you washing off?
Oh, oh.

Rob / Chris (01:07:34):
It's the rag he's been cleaning with.
I thought it was her hair.

Siobhan (01:07:38):
I thought it was her shirt.

Matt (01:07:40):
He was told to take the body with him.

He was indeed.
I just oh no.

Matt (01:07:52):
You have made choices.

Rob / Chris (01:07:54):
Jerry is seeing himself for the first time.

Look at me eyes Scary, scary.

Oh nice.

Siobhan (01:08:05):
Talk about rig a mortis .

Rob / Chris (01:08:09):
I'm going to wipe around her lips.
Thank you, Hannibal Lecter.

Siobhan (01:08:17):
Remember the lips Clarice?
We thought reading the people'snames was bad.

It doesn't seem like they're having
that, bro, just oh my open gash.

Siobhan (01:08:29):
Oh my Lord, Her brain was falling out.

Rob / Chris (01:08:33):
I think that he was a painter in real life.

Siobhan (01:08:37):
Oh, this is good, not even the trunk, the back seat.
She liked the back seat, we puther in it.

Rob / Chris (01:08:46):
She likes the fresh air.
It is his lexis Is he going togo in a garage Boxing.
Just got an upgrade.
She can come home with me now.

Matt (01:08:57):
See, my functional brain is just thinking how's he going
to get his car home?

Oh well.

Oh there's a snowblower.

Rob / Chris (01:09:05):
Hey delivery for Jerry oh Jesus.

Siobhan (01:09:13):
Been talking to Lyssa, old cutter Jerry.

You're the guy Excuse me.

You're the guy, I'm the guy.

Siobhan (01:09:28):
Oh God, that's poor man Is your wife on her way here.

No, she's not on her way here.
She asked me to meet you, so oh, right, yeah, hey, why don't I?
Give you a once-over on this,Dick.
I can read a manual and figureit out myself.
It's a snowblower.
It's not blowing me, is it?
Oh, oh.

Rob / Chris (01:09:52):
Look out.

We're involved in stupid things, so
you could drop the wholebullshit salesman act.

Okay , yeah right, jerry, no problem,
if you can just give me yourinitials here that man has such
a nice coat For a snowblowerdelivery dude.

Siobhan (01:10:10):
It's a deluxe snowblower.

Matt (01:10:13):
What is that?
I know he's got that on lock.

Siobhan (01:10:17):
Oh my God, what's?

Rob / Chris (01:10:18):
happening now.

Siobhan (01:10:19):
Look at that nice polka dot blanket.
It's so nice.
Is that Boxan?
Does he have?

Rob / Chris (01:10:26):
Boxan, you live in the tub now.

Siobhan (01:10:28):
Does he have a fuck-goo starter and he's going to just
sourdough it up for everybody inthe neighborhood and start
selling fuck-goo to everyone.
Oh, fuck-goo starter.

Rob / Chris (01:10:36):
Now he's a dealer.

Siobhan (01:10:38):
Instead of just a user.

Oh, Ooh, ooh.

Rob / Chris (01:10:44):
Maybe Boxan is thirsty.

Matt (01:10:47):
We can re-higrate it.

Rob / Chris (01:10:49):
Yeah, hungry.
Oh my God, why does it move?
Is it a lot?
It's breathing.

Siobhan (01:11:00):
And now I am confused.
Okay, well, that's good,because I'm confused too, so at
least we're all on that samepage.
I'm just going to put Lisa outhere.

Matt (01:11:06):
Yeah, she won't smell at all.

Siobhan (01:11:09):
It'll be fine.

Rob / Chris (01:11:10):
Lisa, you can live in the garage.
What is this?
The crawl space.

Siobhan (01:11:33):
Oh my God, she's so heavy, it's supposed to be very
difficult with Dick Rod.
Yeah, well.

Matt (01:11:41):
He's like, hey, there's that Christmas present I
couldn't find.

Siobhan (01:11:45):
Merry Christmas, Lisa.
What I get it?
I'll make her into a Christmastree.

Rob / Chris (01:11:55):
No one will know.
Oh my God, she's in the boxwhat I think she's in the box.
Did he chop her up?
That's what I'm assuming.
With what the bolt cutter Oneknuckle at a time.
He's making some kind of anapparatus.

(01:12:18):
How does this man?
It sticks to her.

Siobhan (01:12:22):
I'm like.

Rob / Chris (01:12:28):
Boxster what he doesn't want people to be able
to see inside.

Matt (01:12:38):
I'm just going to say if I started doing that to my
windows my neighbors would knowin half a second.
Yeah, like you don't havecurtains.

Siobhan (01:12:45):
Yeah, I'm going to talk to her through the lights.

Rob / Chris (01:12:52):
Okay, this is not at all what I thought he was
doing.
I'm very confused.

Siobhan (01:12:59):
Oh my God Dear, it blit Nope.

Rob / Chris (01:13:08):
Why does it move so much?
It looks like an alien tadpoleI.
Oh my God, oh God, it lookslike a scrotum, looks like a
giant, like the scrotum of aTyrannosaurus Rex.
Oh my God, I hate it whatscrotum looks like that.

Siobhan (01:13:27):
Nobody's scrotum looks like that.
It looks like an egg.

Matt (01:13:32):
A lizard scrotum, if yours looks like that please dial
1-800.

Siobhan (01:13:34):
Please call a doctor, not Mike and maybe not that
dude's doctor.

Rob / Chris (01:13:40):
He sucks, mike and Mort.

Siobhan (01:13:42):
His hair is very perfect.

Look at his hair it's feathered and he's
oh With more information onthis story.
I have Ivan Marovitch,caretaker, and Madame Zoras,
whoever did this.
I hope you are watching now.

I know what is happening to you and I
am the only one who can help you.

So when you are ready to accept my help.

Rob / Chris (01:14:09):
I will be here waiting for you.

Siobhan (01:14:14):
Well, it's got to go everybody.

This is not a suspicious exit at all.
Clean up, it's clean enough.

Well scoop.

You know you really don't look like
the usual type of person I getcoming through this place.

It's a pretty high class place you got
here.

That's real funny.
No, I just mean like you don'tlook like a meth head or some
sloshed up drunk.

Siobhan (01:14:45):
Damn, what a compliment .

Did you kill someone?
Hey look, don't get me wrong.
I don't give a fuck one way orthe other, but they come up in
here to get you.

Siobhan (01:14:54):
I'm just going to say I didn't know anything.
How well does that work for you?

Take them.

Matt (01:15:00):
Seems like a polished strategy the way he's delivering
it so.

What for comrags?
Okay, all right.

Siobhan (01:15:12):
Get out and by.

Matt (01:15:13):
Spectacular, he might be my favorite character.

Siobhan (01:15:16):
Yeah, he really is.

Anybody home?
Hello Lisa.

Matt (01:15:36):
Oh God, mike, she's in the crawl space.

Siobhan (01:15:42):
Are you home?

Rob / Chris (01:15:43):
I smell you Boxan the special two, the downfall of
my conch Lisa.

Siobhan (01:16:04):
Oh god, oh, he's about to find the boom, boom room,
lisa.

Are you in there?

Rob / Chris (01:16:13):
He's gonna recognize it.

Siobhan (01:16:16):
You think he knows?

Rob / Chris (01:16:17):
Well, he's gonna know the glow.
He knows the glow, he's been inthe glow.
What?

Siobhan (01:16:24):
the fuck.
Yeah, that's what we're saying,mike.

Rob / Chris (01:16:27):
I'm gonna say I've enjoyed every minute of this, by
the way.
Oh is the rod up around hisneck now.
Oh yeah, oh my god it's allconsuming.

I'm a big deal.

Rob / Chris (01:16:46):
Fucking coffee.

Siobhan (01:16:49):
You gotta keep that gate close to you.

Rob / Chris (01:16:52):
Keep gate close.

Yep.

Oh god, lisa, are you in here?

Siobhan (01:17:13):
Oh, is it the goo.

Oh, you can hear it.

Siobhan (01:17:16):
Oh.

Rob / Chris (01:17:18):
Why does it move?

Siobhan (01:17:19):
Because it's a little crusty.
You guys remember, gack.
What the fuck did you do?
Goo, he does know.

Matt (01:17:27):
I do remember Gack yes.
Yeah, it's giving me Gack vibes.

Siobhan (01:17:30):
Yeah, I have slime at my house.
I don't think that though.

Matt (01:17:33):
Did you allow your Gack to lay out in the woods for like
eight?

years and become moldy.

Matt (01:17:38):
No, I didn't whack the Gack.

Siobhan (01:17:40):
Get out of here, Mike.

Matt (01:17:42):
Oh, Mike run, she bought him that nice slobber, or?

Siobhan (01:17:50):
just left it outside.
I know Mike.

Oh god, mike, what's up man?
Hey, jeez, what are you doinghere?
You got shit.

What this?
Yeah, it's just a rash.
Doc gave me some kind ofointment.

Rob / Chris (01:18:02):
It is on his neck now.
It's a signal.

It's pretty gross, right, is that?
from that thing.

Siobhan (01:18:06):
It's a signal.
The thing in the tub, it's theAl Gore of it all.

That's what that guy was talking about.
What?
Who was talking about that guy,the big guy from Madame Zora's?
He was on the TV.
She's dead, you know.
And he said whoever did it?
Oh, he knows he's got somethingI can fix.

It Is that you Come on, Mike, you
believe that shit.
He's just trying to trick me tocome to him so he can turn me
into the police.

Okay, let's get you to the hospital.

I'm gonna stay here, Jerry.
Look how did you get in here.

The garage door was open.
It's always open.

Matt (01:18:42):
He really didn't flinch at his friend committing murder.

Siobhan (01:18:44):
Right, I'm like, didn't he just admit that?
He's like what?

I'm just here to help you, man Help.

I mean it's a little late for that.

Listen, isn't?
it.
Listen, jerry.
If you had anything to do withMadame Zora's death, I won't
worry about it.

Siobhan (01:18:58):
We'll cover it up, like he just sort of admitted he did
.

Trust me, I'm your buddy.
I'm your buddy.
What about Lisa?
You gonna help me cover that up.

Rob / Chris (01:19:09):
She got in the way.
She got in the way.
Brazen Love Jerry.

Hey, did you forget that?
You know this is all your fault, bible Tellin' me to cheat on
my wife.

Is that you?
I need help.
I said one time, one and donedon't go back, I'm gonna call a
sponsor.

Oh no, what goes around?

Siobhan (01:19:32):
comes around.
Oh no, Don't breathe in.
Oh, my sweet Jesus.

Oh no.

Siobhan (01:19:40):
No, Bummer dude.
Oh, this is the third.
Got the rage.
You're squeezing his neck.
It's a little bit of a pain.

Matt (01:19:55):
You're suffocating in a bag.
I know I'm like I don't.

Siobhan (01:20:01):
This is really like Real yeah, pretty visceral, if
you will.
I think I've ever seen this inreal life, but I would assume
that's what it looks like nodegree.

Rob / Chris (01:20:12):
No, no, no, no, no, no hey, shhh, box hand, it's
okay hey.

Ew.

Siobhan (01:20:34):
Come here, she's so like Come here beautiful.
Where does it go in?
It looks amorphous.

I.

Siobhan (01:20:54):
I mean I just, oh, god oh.
God, y'all don't want to screwthat thing.
No, what?
Okay, I mean, it's his bias,friend Always wearing his
flannel pajamas.
Yep, yep, oh, it's so cozy withyou.
Box Hand.

Matt (01:21:09):
You and me, and me and you .

Siobhan (01:21:11):
I like the reference too.
You know how sometimes you canget nose blind to stuff.

Rob / Chris (01:21:16):
Oh no, oh, oh, it's getting pussy.

Siobhan (01:21:19):
He done.
He got the boils, got the boxybowl.

Matt (01:21:25):
He's got the box-bowl.

Siobhan (01:21:27):
Oh so.

Oh God, I ain't gonna cover that up.

Siobhan (01:21:36):
Hmm, that doesn't look good at all, god damn.

Oh are your teeth falling out.

Siobhan (01:21:48):
Are you a leper now Looking good, jerry, what Still?

Rob / Chris (01:21:57):
got it yeah, oh no, oh no, oh no, oh no.

Siobhan (01:22:04):
This man is so committed.

Matt (01:22:06):
Oh, oh, the stringy goo.
Oh, oh God, oh God, no, no, no.

Rob / Chris (01:22:15):
I'm afraid of the fire.

Siobhan (01:22:25):
I'm afraid of.


Rob / Chris (01:22:32):
Oh God, oh God.

Siobhan (01:22:35):
Oh Yo, I thought that was the real door.

What are you doing here?
It's your birthday.

Are you okay, Jerry Is?

Rob / Chris (01:22:48):
that a rash?
Oh, that guy's super off-trend.
Is that a rash, poor?

Siobhan (01:22:51):
baby.
But you can't be that sickbecause your wife didn't call us
and cancel.
She's sick too.
Can we see her?

Oh damn, these people.
We both were Thanks for coming.
I'm sorry we didn't call youguys, but the parties canceled.
You can just go now, thanks.

Rob / Chris (01:23:12):
You can just go now .

Could you just get off my property?
I thought your wife wassleeping.
Okay, george, fuck off.
Okay, both of you, all of you,let's get out of here, get off
my property.

Siobhan (01:23:25):
I'm sick.
Oh no, that man literally.

Rob / Chris (01:23:30):
First of all those people were not in the rest of
the movie.

Siobhan (01:23:33):
Who are they?

Rob / Chris (01:23:35):
Neighbors.

Matt (01:23:37):
Are they?

Siobhan (01:23:39):
Oh God, I think she died.

Rob / Chris (01:23:44):
She went from a C cup to a nothing cup.

Siobhan (01:23:49):
If this was a musical, I would watch it.
Oh my God.

Rob / Chris (01:23:54):
You think Bea Harrison would be interested in
directing a musical, making lessinto a musical.

Siobhan (01:24:01):
You have this, a jukebox musical.
What can we do?

Matt (01:24:04):
I will ask him on X and see what he says Boxing in.

Siobhan (01:24:07):
Oh God, boxing in.
You don't have to turn intoblack goose, it's just a
jellyfish.
Now I will eat you and we willbe one, those fucking neighbors.
It's your birthday.

Det. Barnes (from the movie (01:24:27):
Why are you here?

It's your birthday.

Siobhan (01:24:33):
Oh no, Can't survive without the box.
What do you think it was goingto do?

Rob / Chris (01:24:43):
It's still like it sounds like pop rocks.

Motel Manager (from the movi (01:24:44):
It sounds like pop rocks.

Rob / Chris (01:24:47):
It's like it's actively making a noise.

Siobhan (01:24:50):
I'm just like, is this rock bottom?
That's what we think.

You were so young Boxing.

Siobhan (01:25:10):
I feel like those people were like trying to be an
intervention.

Matt (01:25:23):
You must fix her.

I see, you got my message.
Tell me.

Of course , Is this what you talk from us
it is dead no.

No, rooney.
Yeah, I don't know.
I think it is.
Can you fix it?

The hell's that Come with me.
What are we doing?

in here.
What's it done?
Try to relax while I see what Ican do about my friend Friend.
Wait For what it's worth.
I'm really sorry.
That's good.
Listen to make up for it.
You know the business that youlost.

Siobhan (01:26:06):
I used part of it on me with my wife.

I mean it like it, like rocked the
world.
Man, it works inside the woman.
I tried the woman.
I tried the woman.
I tried a little bit, but itdoes nothing for the girl.
I've put it on me first and itall happened inside of her.
Who cares about what it doesfor the girls?
I mean, it's all about the guys, right?
I mean they're your customers.

(01:26:29):
As long as it satisfies him,Can you throw him in the street
and hit him with a car, please.
I want to know what's specialwith my girls.

Siobhan (01:26:34):
Some things to think about.

Yes, I mean, maybe we could work
together I mean I can helpPartners or something and I
could be with it again.
I mean I can help, I can bewith it again.

Do not worry, we will be with it again.

So you'll be able to help me.
Of course, I will get startedBetter if you relax now.

Siobhan (01:27:00):
Thank you.
Is the goo, the like remnantsof dudes, who this has happened
to?
And he's just been fucking likegoo remnants of the people
before him.
Did I guess it Sourdough,starter as I'm saying Goo,
remnants is the guess.

Rob / Chris (01:27:19):
Oh yeah, I mean I'd be okay with that, Just saying
oh yeah.

Det. Barnes (from the movie) (01:27:25):
I got to make a new box, so this
is going to be reboxa.

Siobhan (01:27:29):
You got to do better than reboxa.
No, I got to do better.

Rob / Chris (01:27:32):
I got to do better than reboxa.

Matt (01:27:34):

Rob / Chris (01:27:38):
I got to do better than reboxa Box into Select.

Siobhan (01:27:42):
Box alu.

Rob / Chris (01:27:44):
Box alu, that's electric box.
There, you go electric goopthere you go, Dude.

Siobhan (01:27:52):
the shit on your face is not.
It's like the least of yourworries.
You got some mental illness.
Oh no, not the hair, mybeautiful locks.
Okay, so I'm here for thisending, if I was right.

Rob / Chris (01:28:20):
It's a fresh box.

Oh god.

Rob / Chris (01:28:23):
Now the teeth are gonna come out All at once or
just one, nope.

Siobhan (01:28:27):
And I'm not.
Oh, you're like your whole jaw.
What are we doing?
I don't know.
If you didn't yank it out ofyour face, it probably would
have stayed there.

Rob / Chris (01:28:51):
If Varan is making.

Siobhan (01:28:52):
You should like whip up a quick box.
Yeah, oh, no oh.

Rob / Chris (01:29:01):
Oh my.

Siobhan (01:29:01):
Mm-hmm, he went it up he is not well.

Rob / Chris (01:29:04):
This is escalated quickly.

Siobhan (01:29:06):
Oh, he's got that allergy.
Oh Please, varan, help me.

Boxing.
Oh my god.

Siobhan (01:29:30):
Oh, all right, he's like.
I knew I shouldn't have hadpeanuts.
Where's my EpiPen?

Oh my god .

Siobhan (01:29:46):
It is time.

Rob / Chris (01:29:47):
You know what's horrifying though this the way
he is decomposing is veryreminiscent about what happens
if you actually get Ebola.

Siobhan (01:29:59):
Oh yeah, we're with you , like like pre-been melty flesh
.

Rob / Chris (01:30:02):
You become liquid.

Siobhan (01:30:04):
Yeah, it's crazy From the inside out.
How scary is that?

Oh, my god everybody 99 bananas Mm.

Dude A plus to this special effects.

Siobhan (01:30:23):
I know I feel like they have.

Rob / Chris (01:30:25):
Special effects are outstanding.

Siobhan (01:30:26):
He looking like Palpatine there.
Yeah, he kind of does.
Oh my lord.

Matt (01:30:34):
I second that, Chris.
Oh no, you got to touch them.

Siobhan (01:30:37):
Why would you not use gloves or something?
I mean, I guess he doesn'treally care.
Huh, oh yeah right, is it?
Just the head, Guys.
The leg Is it just the head?
It's a second head.

Rob / Chris (01:30:53):
Why not use the cleaver?
Use the oh.

Siobhan (01:30:58):
I mean, it's not really made of anything.
Oh.

Oh my god .

Rob / Chris (01:31:11):
Oh Well, we're closing the investigation
because we have no leads.

Siobhan (01:31:18):
Okay.

Det. Barnes (from the movie) (01:31:21):
I smell pussy, mm-hmm, guess I
could have been a new psychic.
So I just am coming a mile away.
So you're here to arrest me,then Actually I'm here because
the money we found in MadameZora's hand yielded DNA evidence
.
Jerry Harford Sound familiar.

(01:31:41):
I do not know him.

Siobhan (01:31:44):
Sounds like every other white dude that's ever been
here.
You think he may have killedMadame Zora.

Motel Manager (from the movie (01:31:53):
I don't know you like what you
see.
Oh no, this poor man, maybesomething less compromising.

Siobhan (01:32:07):
And more special.

What are you implying?
Let me offer you somethingbetter.

Rob / Chris (01:32:17):
Let me give you this special no charge.

Siobhan (01:32:23):
I wonder what makes it so good, just dead guy head.
Oh, I'm just saying.

Rob / Chris (01:32:30):
Double entendre there.
Dead guy head-head.

Yeah.

Rob / Chris (01:32:35):
It's that those gummy Like but why Is that?
The end.
Why was it so alive still?
Oh my god.

Siobhan (01:32:46):
I guessed it.

I feel very proud of that.

Matt (01:32:51):
Yeah, be Harrison.

Siobhan (01:32:55):
Well done.

Rob / Chris (01:32:57):
I really did enjoy the message of it all, which I
don't think a lot of horrormovies and maybe I don't watch
enough, but I don't think a lotof horror movies really give you
that kind of Some do, but yeah.
Layers Like Journey.

Siobhan (01:33:15):
Yeah, that was quite the good time.

Rob / Chris (01:33:22):
I laughed.

Siobhan (01:33:23):
The good time, oh my god.
Well, what a time.

Yes .

Siobhan (01:33:30):
I definitely won't look at Jello again, thank you.

Matt (01:33:46):
And I'll see you in the next episode.
Thanks for listening to Mattand Friends Drink the Universe.

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16.5 Lights, Camera, Spirits Part 2 - "The Special" (NSFW)

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.css-14f5ked{margin:0;word-break:break-word;display:-webkit-box;-webkit-box-orient:vertical;box-orient:vertical;-webkit-line-clamp:2;overflow:hidden;}16.5 Lights, Camera, Spirits Part 2 - "The Special" (NSFW)