Generational Trauma and Boarding School Syndrome w/ Piers Cross

Piers Cross is no stranger to the silent damage that elite education can leave behind. He is a leadership coach, author, and documentarian. Cross talks about a deeply personal and widely underexplored topic—generational trauma. Especially one that stems from boarding school syndrome.

In his poignant documentary Boarding on Insanity, Cross sheds light on this emotional trauma. He highlights the structural neglect embedded within boarding school systems. "My father went to boarding school, my godfather went, my uncle went—it was just the done thing," he shares. At age 11, he follows in their footsteps. What begins as an exciting adventure quickly devolves into a harsh reality when his mother fails to pick him up for leave day. "Suddenly, I realized I couldn’t go home anymore," he recalls.

That realization triggers a painful emotional spiral that Cross buries for years. The culture of stoicism at school teaches boys to suppress emotions, especially grief. "I remember crying one night and the whole dormitory came in laughing, shouting, ‘You're not so cool, Cross.’ I made a decision that night to never cry again." That internalized vow carries forward into adulthood. This contributes to what he later recognizes as a complete emotional shutdown. It is a pattern common among men dealing with childhood neglect and toxic resilience.

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