He's AFRAID of the SKY?!?! | MADHD Ep 31 | - Mike and Dylan HATE! Drama

Episode Transcript
Available transcripts are automatically generated. Complete accuracy is not guaranteed.
(00:00):
We need a fancy like Joe Rogan table so we could do that.
We can get one. Switch to the.
If we're looking at each other, then I'm not like, you know,
acting like, well. Then I think it won't be
performing like you won't be like feeling like you need to
entertain. We'll just legit be having a

(00:21):
conversation. Well now I can't use this for
the beginning of the episode. Why not?
For the like, you know how I waslike, man, I hate when they
start a conversation before theyactually get into the podcast.
Yeah, we're just being like every other podcaster ever.
Wow, we're such welcome to, we're such podcasting people.
Welcome to Mike and Dylan Hate, hate drama where we, I'll give

(00:43):
you advice to try to get throughlife because life fucking sucks,
man. It fucking sucks.
If you're like Mike, why are you?
Why are you wearing glasses today?
Can you explain the back story on the glasses?
So the glasses, they're really scratched up all right, and they
have like a perpetual fog tent. Till how long?
How long have you had the framesversus these?

(01:03):
So the lenses I have had for four years and then the frame OK
yeah 'cause the lenses are the Cpart OK And then the frame got
broke my. Youngest one before he moved on
to the PlayStation. Yeah, before he moved on to the
PlayStation, he had a fascination with my glasses and

(01:23):
snapped one of the arms of it off.
So then I got this frame from Walmart and it didn't quite fit,
so I had to, like, bend it up a little bit to get the frames to
pop in. But hey, listen, I didn't have
to go to the eye doctor. Mike went like I'd say 8 months
without glasses because his son broke.
Him and I am blind. I am like blind blind.

(01:44):
Well, it's funny because one dayhe was, you know, he'd been a
long time without his glasses, and they put mine on and he's
like, God, you're blind. And then now that he has his
glasses back, he took his off and put mine on.
And he's like, oh, yeah, we got about the same prescription.
Yeah. But it's one of those things
where your eyes don't adjust until you wear them for a little
bit. It was it was an experience, you
know, I got. I had a lot of people honking at

(02:05):
me, had a lot of angry piano, just a lot of me doing this.
Sorry, brother. Yeah, Sorry, brother.
See you there. I thought you were just like a
telephone pole. I was avoiding you but like.
Right. But yeah, now to have glasses on
my video gaming has gotten better.
I can actually see things. I'm not like attacking random

(02:26):
trees and shit. So did you get your lights on
your car fixed? No, no, no, I still can't.
I can't so. And I've had Dylan help because
Dylan's more knowledgeable aboutcars.
So the high beams and the regular lights went out at the
same time. So I am a smart part.
I don't know shit about cars. OK, And then have a dad.

(02:46):
You can't judge me. I don't know shit about cars.
So they go out at the same time.I'm smart enough to know that's
not a light bulb that just went out.
Something like, yeah, something electrical happened.
We are figuring it out, so I bring it over here.
Dylan's looking at it and it's like this long ass fuse.
The biggest fuse I've ever. Seen the biggest fuse ever and

(03:07):
it has to be like you, you have to go to a Kia dealership to get
it. And I'm just like man, I ain't
doing. I just won't drive my car.
You got any mechanics on that are listening that could what?
What year is it 20/20/21? 2021 and bro so here's the thing
too. I didn't want that fucking car.
Yeah, I wanted like a 1999 HondaCivic.

(03:31):
Yeah, just a beater. Paint, paint rusted off of it.
Just to get to point a point, BIdon't give a fuck about cars.
And I had another Kia. It was like a 2016 and it was
two or three payments away from being fully paid off.
So my grandpa had to go to Raleigh and he was like, hey,
can I use your car? Because I got to get this part

(03:52):
for my car. He had never been in like an
accident or anything like that. So I was like, yeah, I don't
care. So I pick him up and we're
driving to where I work because I'm, I'm going to get out at
work and then he's going to takemy car.
So. And there was a sign that I
shouldn't let him use my fuckingcar.
We park or we get to a light. The red arrow is returning red.

(04:14):
Yeah. And he's like, you know, you
don't got to stop at these. I was like, yeah, yeah, you do.
That's why it's red. They wouldn't have that if you
didn't have to stop at these. And he was like, oh, I never
really thought of that. I was like, there's a sign that
I probably shouldn't let him useit.
So you. Didn't think of that in the
moment, did you? No.
So like halfway through work I get a phone call and apparently
he had tried to do AU turn from the middle lane and got

(04:37):
sideswiped and the only reason it didn't turn into like a
bigger deal was because the people that hit him admitted to
speeding. If they didn't admit to it,
there was it was 100% all on himthat could be done, but he
admitted to it. So so then, you know, we get the

(04:57):
insurance money and Amy's like, well, you need to go to core
that you could drive the kids around in and I'm like, no, I
can just get like a little. You can drive kids around in a
beater too, right? Like I mean you can.
And I'm like, I don't I don't want to do payments on a car
because the more shit we add to bills and shit like that like I
want some breathing room. And she was like no you we got

(05:17):
to get now I have that fucking within like 3 months the Amy
didn't change or didn't get an oil change in it and the head
gasket cracked on it. So now I can't go over like 3000
RPMS or whatever or it starts smoking real bad out of the back
and then now the lights don't work so I can't drive it.
Or right now I could drive till like 9 O clock at night.

(05:39):
Yeah, because it's summer. Yeah, so I mean, I look like a
douche bag at that that late because, you know, you should
have your headlights on by that point.
But you know, I just once again,I just got a lot of people
honking at me. You.
Could just redneck engineer likea light bar on it and then so
then you're technically not as in like you're driving after
dark but at least people will know.

(06:00):
That the funniest shit was when I went to help my grandma out
that one day and I was like oh fuck, I'm in my car.
And so I had to drive back. It was like 9:00 at night, but
it was also three months ago so it was dark and I had a ride
from High Point to Lexington with my hazard lights on.
No lights in the car. All you see going down the
highway is my hazard lights. And I made it all the way home.

(06:20):
No cops stop me. Like do your fucking jobs guys.
Like you should be there to takepeople like me off the road.
Have you ever heard of the urbanlegends?
Well, I guess there was a more recent one, but they, there was
always one up where I grew up inNew York where there was
somebody that like the cops would sit there and they were
like, you know, radar checking speeds and like at a certain

(06:42):
time every like couple weeks or something, there'd be like 250
and like nothing was there. It was just black.
So like the, the story was, is that it was a guy in like a
Lambo with like night vision glasses on, like smuggling drugs
up and down the highway. And so he could just like go
completely Incognito. And then they eventually like
put like a roadblock and stoppedhim but.

(07:04):
Bro, just fucking hop inside of like a Kia Carnival, all right?
Yeah, put you a little nice middle-aged lady right there,
throw you on some glasses and a polo and no cop ever is going to
stop you. And if they do stop you, be
like, oh, sorry, buckaroo, I didn't know I was speeding.
And he was like this dork. And then he's just going to,
he's just going to let you go about your day.

(07:25):
That's what I told my friends like that used to like wear like
tie dyes and hemp necklaces and all this stuff.
And then they'd be like selling like mushrooms or weed or
something. And I'm like, it's not bad that
you're selling mushrooms or weed, but.
Don't look the part. Yeah, you don't have to look the
part, bro. Just that's specifically if you
want to be great at it. Just don't just look like you
don't even look like you look down on it.

(07:46):
Yeah. And if you look like you look
down on it, yeah, we could sell the fuck out of drugs.
Look. Well, that's synchronicity right
there. Neck tattoo and, you know,
sleeves. I could.
I could. Throw a polo.
Yeah, throw a polo on I'll. Get some laser laser treatment
on. Your no, I'll just put a Pitbull
in the car and then the cop willknow that I'm like trying to
turn my life around because that's what all that's what

(08:07):
felons do, man, when they they're trying to turn their
life around to get a Pitbull or they start rescuing pitbulls
you. Think we should start giving
some advice? Oh, should we?
Fuck, I was enjoying the conversation, but I, I, I want,
I don't want people to have to wait too long before they get
the first one. Yeah, before they get the
renowned advice. The that's the reason they come
is for the advice, because they're like, man, you know?

(08:27):
Helping people's lives. Yeah, it's it's too much money
to pay for therapy. Mike and Dylan is going to have
to help us. All right, so the title is, am I
an asshole for cutting ties withmy friend?
This should be on 2 daddies. Dear Mike and Dylan, I'm sorry I
didn't make it to the June 15th Reach around behind the closed
Denny's in Thomasville, NC extravaganza.
You better be sorry, Dick. Yeah, my heart's still broken

(08:49):
from that. I'm not going to lie.
I was ready for a mic. Reach around.
You were not ready. I'll tell you that right now.
You are not ready, but I don't live in the area.
This is my girlfriend's story. Crystal.
All the names are fake. She feels really upset because
she is losing a friend and needsadvice.
Crystal, 40 female, and Heaven, 34 female both work together.

(09:09):
I feel like heaven's not made-up.
No, that seems. Like a That seems like a real
name. Yeah.
They bonded over their relationship issues and drinking
Heaven has two kids, John, 12, and Jess, 16.
Female. I bet Heaven's name is like
Nevaeh or something. I'm really enlightened.
I'm just going to heaven backwards.

(09:30):
That's crazy. But every time I meet in Nevada,
that's crazy because I had a catnamed Nevada.
I've. Never heard that, but now that
makes sense. Yeah, no, there are tons of
people. Tons of people have a kid named
Nevada and they just like, this is my and they're always evil
and it's heaven backwards. And I'm like, I know I had a cat
named Nevada. And it was the devil.
No, Nevada was dope. Dope little cat Crystal and I

(09:53):
started to work on our relationship and we started to
drink less which really helped. Heaven continued to fight with
Herman to the point where they were screaming and screaming
matches in front of the kids andthen one would leave and come
back a couple hours later. Heaven would tell Crystal about
how she was craving sex because Herman could not have sex with
her due to medical and relationship issues.
Heaven started to hang out with an old friend of hers, Dennis,

(10:13):
34, male who was a drug addict and has had allegedly had sexual
relationships with a 16 year old.
Pyre. Haha they put pyre there.
Good. Yeah exactly.
Having grits with your family? Throw a little bit of bacon bits
in it, turn around, see some people screaming.
Wonderful day. Do you feed them to the dog
after they're cooked or what do you do with like afterwards?

(10:33):
Or do you just just burn it until it's like just sheer dust?
Leave them there for a couple days, maybe the grit will like
form some kind of like rock likematerial overtime and we could
just have statues of them and that'll be like a reminder when
you're going through like town. Don't be a pedophile.
Or like the crows will come and like Peck at them and then
they're staying away from like the.
Crows like grits. I assume.

(10:55):
Well, they like meat, and there's meat underneath those
grits. There is meat underneath those
grits. I'm thinking of like a nice
little grit thing where like there's ham in it now.
Pretty good. Yesterday, Heaven told Crystal
that she took Jess and her friend Kim, 16, to Dennis's
house. She told the kids it's for a
Wellness check, but it was really for some male attention.

(11:16):
Crystal told her that she's not OK with that due to past
traumas. And the guy is obviously gross.
Crystal and I said if she wants to be destructive to not bring
the kids and get them involved. Heaven told Crystal about how
much fun the kids had and Heavenhas not really heard them laugh
like that before. They all got home at 5:00 AM
last night. Crystal and Heaven had a long
talk about the whole situation. Crystal tried to tell her that

(11:37):
this is the wrong path, it couldlead to something bad happening
to Jess and her friend. Heaven was making excuses
because she loved the attention of another man and access to
drugs. Crystal decided that the best
course of action is to cut ties with having a focus on us.
So Mike and Dylan, is Crystal the asshole for cutting ties
with heaven because of her bad decision making?
Edit Dylan, for the love of God,please stop interrupting Mike.

(11:59):
Just kidding, guys. The show is awesome and makes my
day so much better. You must be having terrible
days, buddy. Look, this is like a story that
I would read or that I would like, I guess be like living in
if I didn't. Yeah.
But yeah, Crystal definitely made the the right decision,
buddy. Like, I don't think not, you

(12:20):
know, it is unfortunate that herand her heaven and her man be
arguing. All right, that's a terrible
that's a terrible that's a terrible thing.
And in front of the kids. What does not make that
situation better is then having her go and sleep with a drug
dealer for drugs. Honestly, I think a, and it

(12:42):
sounds, it's gonna sound terrible, OK.
And you're gonna be like, wow, Mike, I didn't know you were the
narc type. But look, kids don't choose to
be in households where there is drug abuse and shit like that.
So I think the best course of action is to give her a wake up
call and just like make a littlecall to CPS just to do like a
check. Listen, CPS ain't gonna do shit.
Ain't gonna take their kids. Kids have been in way worse
circumstances. And CPS will be like, all right,

(13:02):
here you go. I think they're fine.
Yeah, We'll, we'll give it. We'll give it back to the the
mother who is currently doing drugs and talking about killing
herself and the kids and then the mom will kill the kids, not
herself. I never read about that.
The the mom then doesn't take her own life but she kills the
kid. Just give a little call so she
can get just at least get a little wake up call.

(13:22):
Like hey, if you really care about these kids, step the fuck
up. Well, yeah, cuz ultimately the
innocent parties are the kids and that and so like by allowing
heaven to continue to go cuz like that's one of the craziest
things about predators and the shitty people in this world.
A lot of them are charming. There's some of the nicest
people you'll meet initially andthen like.

(13:45):
Only people who are watching just saw the devilish look.
That's right, I bring up the pyre so nobody expects me.
But like I mean classes. During those Bros like fogging
up on my hot face. Yeah, but like with the, you
know, the kids, she's like, oh, they had, they had such a good
time and they laughed and they enjoyed themselves.
Yeah, because he's a manipulative fucking asshole who
sells drugs and sleeps with 16 year old girls.

(14:07):
Like, no, don't take your kids over there.
Like just because he's like an enjoyable.
Mom should know, like the mom should be well aware of this.
The bitch is like what, 34? Got to be.
Like that is the age. Listen, that's the age where we
assume that you know right from wrong, that you should be like,
huh, do I want to take my kids to go cheat on my husband and to

(14:28):
do some drugs? Well, don't you think that would
like ruin your time anyways though?
Like, I mean, if you're really trying to like have a good time,
like kids. Unless they're one of the moms
that don't mind if they their kids here.
A moaning bro that's my mom usedto do that.
Well, I mean, that my mother wasa screamer, you know, growing up

(14:49):
with drug addicts is it's an experience and you got to deal
with the good, which is you could do a lot of more, like you
can get by with a lot more things that they would be like,
oh, yeah, that's normal. You know, they're just going to
go in the woods and light some shit on fire.
You know, just be safe. Don't set anything else on fire.
All right? But then you got to deal with
the bad, too. And it is that they don't see
past any of their problems, really.

(15:11):
So yeah, when they start doing it at night and what's so funny
is they had no shame because like, me and my brothers would
be like playing video games or some shit.
And my oldest would be like, oh,do it harder, do it harder.
Mocking them. Yeah, bro, Jason just mocked the
goddamn shit out of them. And I'm like, they hear that.

(15:32):
What did they think we're cheering them on?
Like go in there and fuck my mom, brother, You're like, yeah,
good job. It's so look, man, it's fucking
weird. It's fucking weird.
And I think that's why that could be why I have like mental
health problems. Dude you have like 1000 reasons
why you have mental. Health and it's just it's like
it's speaking to a therapist andthe therapist, like, I get done

(15:53):
with the story. The therapist, like, I think I'm
gonna kill myself, OK, because Idon't know, life could be like
this like Jesus Christ. But yeah, I just.
I don't obviously Crystal made the right decision.
All right, yes. Nobody is going to read that
story. I'm like, Crystal, you got a
sport, your friend. Well, there's going to be some
people that are going to be likeCrystal.
You got a sport your friend likewell.
And congratulations on you, you and Crystal for like.

(16:17):
Focusing on sobriety. And yeah, and like, trying to
make your life better, like like, you know, me and Mike on
MADH or no, this is MADHD. Like we had that big discussion
about advertising and stuff and like, neither one of us are
advocating that people do drugs or not do drugs or drink or not
drink. Like they're all personal
decisions. But if you have a problem, you

(16:38):
have a problem. And like, yes, if you have a
beer here and there, it's not a big deal.
If you're getting like fucking hammered all the time, it is
terrible. If you're waking up in the
morning and you're like, well, the only a shot will stop the
shake. Got to talk to somebody.
Got to got to speak to somebody.If you're at a point to where
you're like, it's OK for me to take my kids over to this drug
dealer's house while I sleep with him and he gives me drugs,

(17:00):
we're probably, yeah, we're at awe're at a point where we got to
talk to somebody. We got to we got to speak to
someone. And no judgement like other
than. Little bit of judgment, the
safety. Of your kids, like that's where
I judge. But like you as a individual,
like you can get as fucked up asyou want to.
It's a problem though, and you should probably rein it in,
figure it out, solve that shit because like, I'm sorry, life at

(17:25):
least most of the addicts are inrecovering addicts and former
addicts that I've talked to, life is actually better without
the drugs. It's not as like high of highs,
but it's also not as low of lows.
So it's. Just kind of a in between a
steady flat line of. We're all right.
Yeah, we're good. Yeah, we're good.
It's not like, you know, waking up in the morning being like all

(17:46):
groggy and shit. And listen, as a guy who has
done a lot of drugs in his life,I could tell you that Dylan is
wrong. Look, Dylan's wrong.
Don't stop, OK? If you if you ain't got no kids
and you ain't got no family, just keep going, brother.
Like, keep going. See how far you can take it all
right? Without, like, really, really
getting crazy and, you know, fucking a lot of shit up.

(18:07):
See, I was fucking up other people's lives.
I was always the like, I mean, I've done a lot of drugs too.
I just didn't do like the hard drugs.
I was like, you know, weed. Weed is like psychedelics.
If it comes from the earth. That's my.
That's basically my if. It comes from the Earth.
Like if you got a like, you know, if you got to get it, if
you got to siphon it from the plant with gasoline, then it

(18:27):
starts to become a drug, all right.
Like if you got to make that shit in like a trailer using
shit that you got from Walmart, every single ingredient.
All right, now the idea for the damn, what is it called?
Sudafed. Yeah, yeah.
Now that now they. Thanks by the way, meth heads
for. Fucking it makes it a pain in
the ass. I could just go get some cold.
Because my wife likes that stuffand every time I got to show my

(18:48):
idea and I was like, how many times do I got to show this
before they like I get a knock on my door.
Now, I never did the big three in drugs, which is crack, heroin
and meth, because I was like, man, I just I don't know.
I still think that I would have been like a responsible crack.
It like I would have been a responsible crack And I'm like,
you only smoke. I only smoke crack on Saturdays.
All right, and I have to at least get half of my supply for

(19:12):
free because I'm not spending, you know, money on it.
Hey, I like to play video games more than I like to do drugs.
So I would be a waiting on a game a lot more with a lot more
anticipation than the the crack.So heroin, I just don't feel
like I've seen people do heroin and they talk about how good it

(19:33):
feels. But I am more of an upper guy.
I like I like to conversate. And you know, I enjoy the I
enjoy the sociality of drugs. All right, I enjoy the the
socialness of it, being able to talk to people about the
craziest shit you ever talked about.
We'll. See, that's why you do
psychedelics and then you just have 5 conversations that you're
talking to yourself about and you don't even have to worry

(19:56):
about anybody else. I've done acid twice, I've done
streams twice. The acid.
I don't know if I told the storyabout the doing the acid.
No, I'm not on the. But I've done two hits of it and
I had. This is the first time I ever
did it and I'm pretty high and Iremember I thought it was going
to be like leprechauns and shit like that.

(20:16):
It was not like your vision likemight get a little bit distorted
if you're staring off at something like off in the
distance. It could be different things.
I remember going outside and there was a birdhouse in the
neighbor's yard and I was looking at it and it kind of
looked like an evil little face smiling at me.
So I like walk up to it. I was like oh what is it?
And it's a birdhouse. I'm like oh that's cool.

(20:37):
So I'm like 3 hours into it and my friend starts to watch
Trailer Park Boys. So I'm like you know what, I
feel good enough. I'm a go home.
So I get in the car, it's like midnight.
I start going down business 85 in North Carolina and the
shadows off the trees like goingby and the trees going by and

(20:58):
I'm just like I can't fucking see anything.
So now I'm going 15 miles an hour down the highway and I'm
just like sitting there. I'm like, well, if the cop pulls
me over, I'll be like, listen, I'm having a panic attack,
brother. I'm panicking real bad.
All right? I don't know what I I don't know
how much like, I was trying to think of a, a coherent way to
explain to a cop that I'm freaking out without it sounding

(21:18):
like drugs. You know what I'm saying?
I'll just be like, yeah, I'm freaking out because the trees
are moving, man. Like and oh, he would have hit
you with. The flashlight in your your
pupil I'd have been like puss. In boots.
Yeah. Just save me brother.
It's just a panic. Attack, I swear.
But yeah. I was just like not my not my
type of thing was I could do coke.
I could do well see you made a wrong.

(21:39):
Decision in that process like never get behind the wheel of a
car like that is but it was. Over like I was like it's been 3
hours what other drug do you need to do that three hours
later it's still having an effect yeah no, I.
I made a poor decision one time.We were down at the beach
visiting a friend of mine in Wilmington, and we didn't let
him know that we had just eaten some mushrooms on the beach.

(22:01):
And we come back to his house and I think he was practicing
with his buddy, playing music. And we got back and he's like,
yeah, after we get done with practice, we'll go down and eat
something. So we went and took showers.
Best showers ever are when you are under the influence of
mushrooms and so like shower awesome, get out on top of the

(22:24):
porch in Wilmington. Beautiful day.
Awesome. And then he's like, let's go to
the restaurant. And I made it down the stairs,
out the door and maybe like one house over and there was like
this big, huge tree. And I was like, I'm just going
to sit down at this tree. And I, I don't really want to go
to the restaurant. I'll just sit at the tree.
And there's like, no, come on, man.
And so like me and my other buddy are tripping, but the one

(22:44):
guy that lives down there doesn't know we're tripping.
He just thinks we'd like been drinking.
So he's like, yeah, let's go to the restaurant.
So we get there and we're standing in like the crowd of
people, like at the bar waiting for a booth, right?
I'm like starting to freak out. I'm just like, as long, like as
soon as we get to this booth, I'll be good because it's just
going to be the three of us then.
And like, it's not going to be this big old crowd.

(23:05):
And then right as I was thinkingthat three spots open up at the
bar and my buddy that doesn't know we're tripping is like, Oh,
we'll just sit at the bar. And so we sit down there and you
know, like it was one of those posters behind us, like or not
behind us, but behind the bartender of like the NFL.
And you know, they're always like mean mugging and like, look
at how dirty and shit. And so like I'm just like

(23:27):
slouching down. And so it's me, the guy that
doesn't know we're tripping and then the other guy that is
tripping and in the process of doing this, they're having a
conversation. So like, I'm just like wall
here. I'm you're, you're more.
Focused on the mean black guys on the poster coming to get you
right. There's a couple of big white.
Guys on there too, I think like Ben Roethlisberger or something
like that. But like it was just like a

(23:48):
bunch of huge dudes like mean mugging me.
And then like another thing is when you're tripping, like you
can't eat. And so we're at a restaurant to
eat and the bartender comes up. He's like, what do you want?
And I basically just grab the menu and I'm like.
Because I can't read. Right now, either like, I'm just
like in full panic mode and I'm just like you.

(24:08):
You want that? Yeah, yeah, All right.
And. You just want a side of cheese,
that's it. You want some cheese dip, so
drink it. He came out with like a.
Sandwich with like fries and I just tried to eat a single fry
and like well I'm panic attacking and just try to eat
that. I swear I had that thing in my
mouth for like 20 minutes just going.
Trying to chew. It and swallow it and so I ended

(24:29):
up like putting my head down sweating all that craziness.
Finally we get like ready to go,we pay, we go outside, I'm fine
again. Like as soon as we're outside,
I'm fine again. And like that's one of the
biggest things that I ever learned is like, I've eaten
mushrooms a bunch of times and like some of the worst.
I mean, all of them were good times and some of them were
around big crowds, but it's big crowds at like a hippie festival

(24:51):
where everybody else is on drugstoo and you know it.
So you're not like paranoid thatlike somebody's going to like
find out that you're tripping. And so like when you're in
society thought it was going. To be like a 90s commercial
where they're like, this guy's on drugs and then like fucking
the camera gets real close to you and like what that's.
Exactly what's so funny, though?Is everybody who does shrooms an
acid will tell you a story like that before they're like you

(25:13):
just drive it. I'm like what?
No, that's how you just you justdescribed an awful experience.
I go through panic attacks regularly without drugs.
I don't need the drugs to to getinto a panic attack.
Well, that's what we need to. Do the documentary for so that
we can actually like fix the shit inside you.
And yes it will be through hallucinogens.
You guys don't know this. All right, I have a lot of

(25:34):
mental health issue. Like I have a lot of problems
that I go through. It might seem like all sunshine
and rainbows. Mike's this really, really funny
guy, all right, But I have like you don't, you don't get out of
a childhood that I had unscathed.
You don't get out of drug addiction unscathed.
And it's like a lot of stuff that, you know, that I still got
to work on because it does affect my day-to-day, it affects

(25:57):
sleep, all sorts of shit. Well, and unfortunately.
It affects people around you, right?
Though not intentionally right. And it's a lot of work,
unfortunately because we live inAmerica that work costs money.
So we are going to do the document.
Like I said, I have the fucking agoraphobia from the, you know,
the drug induced panic attack I had in like 2018 or 29, I can't

(26:19):
remember which year was from thetramadol.
And then, you know, just just coupled on with the the other
shit like it is, it's a it's a pretty rough life for MM can sit
here and be, you know, funny andstuff.
And I, you know, it's the podcast is me and Dylan
essentially shooting the shit and the the mic that you get,
you know, on the podcast is the mic that is, you know, generally

(26:42):
in life with people. I'm not, you know, sitting here
being like a Debbie Downer and shit like that.
But when people are like, man, Ican't believe that guy committed
suicide, but I can you can't seeit.
You can't see it on the outside.I do want to say too, you ain't
got to worry about that like me ever Fucking just killing
myself. I love me too much and I am able
to recognize that, Hey, the good, the good thing, the the

(27:06):
shit like when like shit happensto like Robin Williams, him
taking his life, you know, Anthony Bourdain, the shit like
that, while it is a tragedy in that moment, saves more lives.
Like you don't understand how many lives that saves because
then you be like, well, you know, you see these guys, they
didn't seem like that. So the end that really opens
people's eyes to like start asking family members questions,

(27:27):
start asking their children questions because they're like,
you know, I see my kid, my kid, you know, seems normal.
But I just have to make sure because a lot of parents, they
have a, you know, a normal childwho's going to school.
He comes home, he plays video games.
And then one day they walk into the house and he's hung himself
in a closet. And it does, it does open up the
conversations for us to be like,OK, we know this shit happens to

(27:48):
people that don't fucking, whichhonestly, I don't want to talk
about on the podcast, but I was just like, this is like a today
thing. We had a big today moment.
I went to bed at like 9:00 last night.
And then I woke up at 1:00 and with the whole tooth shit, like
the tooth thing on top of it. We we've talked about Mike's
broken tooth with the whole tooth thing on top of it.

(28:10):
I've just been fucking just going through it honestly.
Suicide is a lot cheaper though because the fucking not for your
family. Because then they got to figure
out how to. I don't know man, I really
think. I really think because all the
followers I have listened and everybody likes to show out when
somebody dies. That's why I like, you know,
musicians get way more famous when they kill themselves.

(28:31):
Yeah, if I were to do that, oh man, they raise a fuck ton of
money for my family. Yeah, I guess so.
You'd be fucked like the guy that's with me every day.
The podcast I'd much rather. Have you here look the guys on
the? Podcast are the people, people
that watch the podcast, they really know we know we know
Dylan's there. We know.
We know Dylan's poor because he was associated with Mike so
fucking. We'll do a separate.
We'll do this. GoFundMe is for Dylan and I'd be

(28:54):
funny if that one just like out did the family one like Dylan's
got like $1.1 million in his andmy family has like $3500.
You know they'd be taken care. Of but don't do it.
Oh. Man saying some.
Gay shit like that makes it listen guys.
Once again, you don't have to worry about that.
Like I am aware enough to be like, hey, like they're like I

(29:15):
understand that I have like mental health shit going on in
my life and that the the where it gets too fucked up is when I
stopped talking about it. That's when like I don't know
that's when things will kind of get worse is when I just like
cuz I'll shut off Dylan. I know that Dylan knows that I
just shut off. I don't like you know, we'll be

(29:35):
fucking it. What sucks is the it's so hard
to talk about, all right, because look, I come from a
time, I come from a time where it was gay to talk about your
feelings, all right, So I'm going to be a little bit gay
right now, but it's like, you know, I deal with things where
like my normal day-to-day, I would seem like I would be like

(29:57):
an extrovert. I'm not an extrovert.
I'm more introverted, especiallylike in public and shit like
that. I will, you know, crack jokes
with people. I will especially like when
someone comes up and meets me, I'll go out of my way to try to
be more extroverted because you don't want to meet somebody and
they're just like, oh, hey, man,yeah, thank you for the enjoying
the like, I fucking sit there and I crack jokes because that
makes somebody's day. Like I imagine if I met somebody

(30:18):
that I fucking admired or enjoyed their content and then I
came up to it and I was like, man, and they're just lying, but
I think. Also, I think you kind of put
that pressure on yourself because I think people know
you're just a regular guy and you are funny and you're gonna
be funny even in a regular conversation.
But I feel like you, you feel like you gotta do that.

(30:39):
But if any of these people that are listening right now met you
right now over at the bar, they would not be like, Mike wasn't
even really that funny. I don't think that people put
that on you. You put that on yourself.
And that's one of those things that I've talked with Mike about
is he puts a lot of pressure on himself to perform and to do

(30:59):
things. And like with this podcast,
I've, we were just talking aboutbefore we got on here was like
how much it has to be like thesedifferent shticks and these
different gimmicks and stuff like that.
I. Just genuinely like, you know,
unfortunately during the time I popped off, I popped off during
a time where, you know, the shithas shifted more towards the

(31:20):
short form content. And that is just like, it has to
be something that people watch from beginning to end.
And it always has to be something.
And there has to be like something going on.
You got to be funny. You got to be fucking just like
crazy. And then the clips you see off
of just like the big podcasts, like you when you see that
stuff, you're like, OK, well, you know, if I want to grow then

(31:40):
I have to do that stuff. Yeah, Cuz I did, like I said, I
didn't watch podcasts before we started a podcast and I just
assumed that we would, you know,it, it is a conversation, but it
just has to be like fucking compelling.
I, I didn't understand why. Just like people sat down and,
and fucking did it. And then people would comment
and just be like, you know, we just enjoy hearing y'all talk.

(32:01):
You know, I was like, that's fucking, that's fucking wild.
But with the, the introverted stuff, so I, it's like I have
throughout the day, I'll have the then it comes with like
being bipolar, you have like thehighs and then you have like the
fucking lows. And what sucks is, is if I were
to do one of the like when people, when people talk about

(32:24):
lows, it's not that you're sad or you know, you feel depressed
or, or or really with depressiontoo.
It's not that you feel sad, it'sthat you feel nothing.
And if you could, if you've never experienced what it feels
like to feel nothing, you would take like when I get into those

(32:44):
like I look up click, like click, the sad moments from like
clicking shit like that just to try to make myself feel, try to
make myself feel sad because feeling nothing hurts like it.
It almost like to a physical point hurts.
It's the weirdest shit when you just feel nothing.
It's just like apathy. You have no care to do anything.
You don't want to listen to music, there's nothing that you

(33:05):
want to do and you just feel hollow on the inside.
Like that is the worst shit. Like I'll look up sad stuff
because I know if I look up sad stuff and I can make myself sad,
then from the sadness I can makemyself happy.
And if y'all you guys are like Mike, that sounds crazy.
It is fucking crazy, man. It's fucking wild.
But it's just really hard to, I don't know right now for me to

(33:25):
like put in the work to do, likethe podcast part is easy.
This is the easy part. Having conversation with a
friend, talking to, you know, you guys, that's the easy part.
It's then like when you got to do all the, you know,
promotional stuff for it, get people, get people to watch it
and shit like that. That's what makes it fucking
hard. And I'm just like, we have all

(33:46):
this content from, you know, especially 2 daddies. 2 daddies
is a lot more marketable than Mike and Dylan hate drama
because it's more niched. If you guys ever want to get
into anything, always start off with a niche.
People say that, but the reason you start off with a niche is
because there's people that are looking for that content.
All right? People aren't looking for just

(34:06):
like a general general podcast where, you know, two guys sit
here and just shoot the shit. People are looking more for, you
know, actual things match the gathering fucking architecture
shit like that. Shit that they're, you know,
passionate about World War, a World War 2 fucking podcast.
So 2 daddies is a lot more marketable.
We have all those clips and thenalso from the social media.

(34:30):
I was popping off from doing theam I the asshole stuff ad switch
to doing that. So naturally it makes sense.
What you would do is. Just take the fucking clips from
2 daddies judging baddies and cut them up and put them on the
fucking social media platforms with a little thing that says
hey check it out. Can't fucking do that.
Like I can't. Like, it's so hard to just,

(34:50):
like, drag myself to do that shit.
Yeah, it's mental. Blockages it's not it's not like
that you're lazy and don't want to do it.
It's like finding the ability tolike actually make yourself take
that first step. Move into the move in front of
your computer, do the thing and like once because that's one
thing that I've noticed with youis like once we get you running
like you're running and everything's good, but like the

(35:13):
second that it falls off like it's hard to get you back going
again, like and that's. The shitty part too is I am a
dad, so it's like throughout theday we'll be going and then I
have to do something leave and you know, go get a kid or
something like that. And then fuck in the middle of
that. I just like I said, I'll the
drive goes away. It's replaced with the

(35:33):
hollowness. And then I just got to be like,
well, fucking maybe I'll maybe I'll get a spark here in a
minute. And it's this the shitty part
about mental health. And it's all This is why it's
good to just like talk about it too, because talking about it
does help. Like honestly, talking about
anything does help. And it's, it's just if you, if
you have a friend that goes through it, like Dylan, Dylan

(35:54):
will see too. Like when I'm dealing with
something mental health related,because you know, I have that.
And then I have like the fuckingagoraphobia.
Remember when we were doing the podcast, we still we got to, we
got to cut that, cut up my part and put it on Reddit just so
people can see what it's like. I was on the third floor.
Yeah, I think it was 3rd, 6th. No it.
Was sixth. It might have been fifth.
Yeah, it was it. Wasn't higher than five, it
wasn't it? Wasn't high but still like it.

(36:17):
The fucking agoraphobia is like the worst one.
I hate that fucking shit and that's what we walk into the.
Studio and like as you walk intothe entrance of the door for the
whole office part you can just see straight out over top of
Winston Salem and so like Mike'slike Nope yeah, Dylan.
'S Dylan was like I don't it might not be as bad and I'm like
trying to hold shit so I don't like physically pass out Well,

(36:39):
that was before we. Even like when we got out of the
truck, that's when I knew because like I haven't seen.
I know you've talked about it and like when I picked you up
from like Pilot Mountain and stuff like that, I could see
that you were like, uncomfortable.
But when we pulled up in front of the office building and then,
like, you were like, literally like wobbly legs, like about to
fall over. I was like, OK, like, this isn't

(37:01):
just, like, you know, tough it out, but like, get that's a
fucking die. That's I hate this shit too,
because bro, it's like one side of your brain is just in panic
mode and the other side is like,bro, you're so stupid, like
nothing's going to happen. Do you think you're going to
float up in the sky and die, Mike?
Like what, what are you doing? We just need to like calm down,
take a deep breath. And then the other side of the

(37:22):
brain is like, I'll fucking passout right now.
I don't give a fuck. I'm scared like this is I'm not
fucking with this shit. So so Dylan does get to see it
When we were going to Georgia, which fucking Jesus, it's hard
for me to go to another city. Going to another state was
rough. Like it was rough.
I don't believe in benzos, like I don't.

(37:46):
They are detrimental to people'shealth.
It's one of the withdrawals thatcan kill you.
I had to get some of those to goto fucking Georgia.
I know that was like no way. Which honestly I wish I didn't
do like not because like I do, Iwouldn't like that high anyways,
but it only lasted for like likeI'd have 30 minutes of like
relief and then it's like back to panic and I'm like, what the

(38:07):
fuck is this like worthless? Yeah, this is crack.
Anxiety medicine like this is this is essentially shittier.
So I don't know with a differentSSRI's though, because they're
like the ones that like build upin your system.
Those, those have their own scariness about them too,
because it's like, oh, well, if you, you know, fuck around and
do this, you'll get serotonin syndrome and die.

(38:27):
And I'm like, what the fuck are you?
You'll fucking have a, all of this shit is like soup, like the
medicine that you're supposed totake.
And I know it's just like, it's partially by anxiety too,
because it's the craziest shit. I'll have anxiety over medicine,
but if somebody was like, I got a couple Percocets, I'm like,
oh, all right, well, this is a medicine.
Yeah, why don't you divvy them out?

(38:48):
Which bro? That frustrates Amy to no end.
Because I like get sick and she'll give me some medicine for
my sickness and I'll be reading the back.
She's like, the fuck you readingthe back for?
Like you have snorted drugs off the back of a toilet before.
I was like, I am now 32 years old, OK, responsible.
My, my body has been run down. I got to make sure that I'm not

(39:09):
going to fuck up from this. And that is part of it that
fucks me up, which is why, like I said, I do want to start the
the because the part of the documentary too, is going to be
me getting healthier. But when we get into the, the
actual building, once we get up to the floor, I'm still like,
we'll, we'll, we'll try to get my part from that.

(39:30):
And just so, so we can just do alittle, we should put some like
like happy because I'm just, andI'm looking at the camera too.
I'm trying to make it a funny moment because I'm just, I'm
going through it. But then the guy starts talking
about the Panthers. And because he was able to do
something that got my like attention, it just took it just

(39:51):
took me out of it. And then I'm starting to have
like a real actual conversation and then once that.
Conversation's over, you went. Yeah, right back down.
And. I was like, now I got to go cuz
I've I've, you know, essentiallythe spark is gone.
Well, that's got. To be just taxing cuz like, I
mean technically everything we do is chemicals.
And so to put yourself in like, oh shit, there's a tiger or a

(40:14):
lion about to eat me for like 40minutes and then you get like a
quick like 5 minute reprieve andthen like it's back to like
tigers here. And then you're like, after that
it's just got to be like days that it's got to take to like
get back to normal, brother. It's.
And so that, like I said, that'sone piece of it.
And then you have like the highs, the lows and, and you

(40:34):
got, you can't fucking do certain things because then your
body for no reason, no fucking logical reason, just wants to
freak out about something. But like, sometimes it really is
just a, a struggle to just get out of bed.
And that's why I like when I talk a lot of shit about the
people in my past, I give my mommore of a, a reprieve.
You know, she did drugs, she laid in bed essentially all day.

(40:57):
But to understand that she went through shit that would fold
fucking 99.9% of people on this earth, you know, she did all
right with what she had. You know, I never grew up and
was like, Oh, my mom don't love me, you know, so I could just, I
could just understand what she she went through.

(41:19):
And then, you know, I do have another brother and he goes
through a lot of the similar stuff that I go through.
And I don't know, it's not like a pat on the back, but I was
like, fuck, I could be like that, you know, And it's just
it's rough. It's rough too, because, you
know, you see somebody struggling, you understand what
they've went through, but there's like fucking nothing you

(41:40):
can do to help them. And that's the so if we.
Figure this all out if we do this documentary and we figure
out like how to fix you, we needto make one of these fucking
therapies a sponsor of our fucking podcast, right it's.
Like I. Mean ultimately that's like the
whole goal is to get that stuff out there because I'm sorry and
like, you know, people I think mostly agree with this, but like

(42:02):
prescription drugs do not fix problems.
They no, they mask yes, they deal with the symptoms, but they
never actually like fix the underlying issues.
So you're constantly fucking. Lexapro.
I was, I was prescribed Lexapro 1215 years ago, a long fucking
time ago. And I'm looking it up.
And that's the worst thing you could do, though.

(42:23):
I mean, I guess you need to do it because it's medication, but
I'm looking it up and it's just like, yeah, you know, it kind of
worked for me. And then some people were like,
fuck, I thought I was dying. Listen, I, it, it took me from
like panic attacks to you're going to die attacks.
And then also my Dick would justejaculate randomly and I'm like,
what the fuck? Why?
Why? Like I don't listen, I'm OK

(42:45):
having a panic attack. I'm not OK with my Dick
ejaculating randomly. I can like I could cover up a
panic attack. I can't just be in a store just
like oh God, and you can cover up a hard.
On and you can't cover up the finish like the finish is the
problem that is a. Lot of them are like that.
I do think with the documentary,Step 1 is like I want to do the
cognitive behavioral therapy. But the biggest thing of the

(43:08):
documentary too is you guys can tell I'm not the healthiest of
all of people. I was pretty healthy back when I
was working and I do believe like I could still, you know, go
to the beach, go to a tall like a high floor in a building.
That didn't bother me. And it was like, as you know, I

(43:30):
got focused more on content and focused away from, you know,
being healthy and, and just, it was technically not even
healthy. I was just working, you know, 12
hours in a hot ass factory. If you're fat during that,
brother, kudos cuz your old lady's laying it down and you're
just, you're just gobbling it up.
But but to, to go to what I am now, you know, 24250 just 100%

(43:58):
if you eat better, if you exercise like this is real shit
that does really affect your mental state.
It's easy to tell somebody with like, you know, mental illness
to oh, well, if you just eat right and you exercise
regularly, it'll be better for you because then they have to do
it. You know what I'm saying?
And getting getting past like just even in late, because I've

(44:21):
had definitely had lazy moments.So we're not, I'm not going to
be like, Oh, everything's mentalillness, you know, blah, blah,
blah. There's been times where I'm
like, I'm just going to play a fucking video game even if I
feel good. So it's not only getting past
the like human part of us now, just like wanting to just like
relax and shit like that. It's also getting over the
hurdle of then the fucking just like you can't really do fucking

(44:43):
anything. You have no desire to do
anything. Getting over those two things.
That makes it really fucking hard.
But Dylan got some exercise equipment.
So we're going to fucking, we'regoing to start working out.
Yeah, we started this morning. I by the time I got to the
office, I'd already done 40 minutes of exercise, got in 3500

(45:05):
steps and just and, and like, that's the thing though, is
like, it's so counterproductive.Like mentally it's so I got into
really, really good shape when Iwas like 23 and then I was like,
I'm going to take a couple weeksoff because like I worked really
hard did it. And like I, that's been my joke
that I tell everybody is like, I'm still on that two week break
and I'm 38 years old now. Like, I mean, it's been 15 years

(45:27):
and like, I still like claim like, Oh yeah, I know what I'm
doing with, you know, exercisingand all that stuff.
But it is a weird like chicken and egg scenario where, yes,
exercise, exercising and eating right is good for your mental
health. It makes you feel better.
It makes you feel like you have more energy.
However, like you also have likethe evolutionary things of like,

(45:52):
hey, I'm not going to like go out and do all this exercise
because I want to save my calories.
And it's not even something thatyou're putting like in your
brain. It's just the way your body
operates. And so like, it does feel good
to be lazy and then it also feels bad to be lazy.
So it's like this whole weird system that like keeps probation
even fuck. Sucks, man.
Why couldn't I have just been like, I don't know, a dog tiger,

(46:14):
not a dog. If I was a dog, I'd have it.
I'd have it rough. I'd be in like a dog fighting
and I'm like my fuck. Well, at least you'd be out.
Quick, I'd be sitting in a. Cage watching somebody watch
like you know fucking homeward bound.
I'm like look haves a good family they're going to run away
from it like what the fuck is this?
I think they got left somewhere by accident and then they were
like, we're just going to travelthere.
So you always go to the. Negative.

(46:35):
Like I just think of like all the dogs that I've had and like,
I am an extremely. Positive person.
I'm just saying if that was it, like I would be in like a dog
fighting ring and then, you know, I do think I would make it
out of it. You know, I would be the, I
would be the dog that wanted to change.
And then I would get adopted by a felon, all right, that adopts
pit bulls to change their life. And then me and that guy would

(46:57):
be, we'd be all right. But he'd only had me for like 2
years till I died. Because, you know, I've been
through a lot, brother. Yeah.
How many throats? Did you RIP out in the process
the dog fight a bunch in order? To get out me.
And him would be out in. The park playing and I just stop
and have fucking like PTSD of everything.
I'd like to see another dog and I should be like blood.
I'm sorry like all we're going to get to another piece of
advice. Oh man am I the asshole?

(47:24):
Slash needs advice. Hey Mike and Dylan.
All right guys some back story. So I moved away from my home
state 12 years ago for a job andgot the job I wanted and haven't
talked to my dad's dad's side ofthe family since.
So as I am sitting down I decided to check Facebook and
got a message from a family member who is a convicted
pedophile starting off good. He got arrested for it a while

(47:46):
ago while I was in high school. I wasn't the victim, it was
their own kid. Basically the Facebook message
was like yo I haven't seen you in a while, how's life blah blah
blah. Basically the person wanted to
know if they could come visit me, would I be the asshole if I
cut off contact and just not replied anymore?
What would y'all do? As far as I know they have no
idea where I live, only what state I live in.

(48:06):
Now look, this is perfect advicefor Mike because we've actually
had a couple instances of littlepedophilia in the family.
Now when I talk about like the shit that my grandpa did, a lot
of that shit didn't like become signed, sealed, delivered until
afterwards. Like I had my own experience
with like the shit he said. People are going to hear this

(48:29):
story and they're going to be like, that's so weird.
Like you just you cut off contact.
You don't love them anymore. It's fucking hard.
It's it's the family thing. It's the you grow up with, you
know, family's family. This is your grandpa, this is
your brother, this is your dad. And you're supposed to love
them. And blood is thicker than water.
And you grow up with that shit. It does make it hard to sever
connections. At the end of the day, yes you
got to like not talk to them anymore.

(48:50):
They're a terrible fucking person and you owe them nothing
ever. You don't owe them sympathy.
You don't owe them anything. Cutting off connection is good
but there is this weird dynamic that's like because they are
related to you and that's just something like you have to.
Honestly, I think it's good thatyou move states away if you do
have a toxic side of the family and not good side of the family,

(49:13):
especially if they defend that guy.
That's one thing I can't stand is the, you know, well,
everybody knows he's this way. Fuck that shit like my, that's
why my kids just didn't, they didn't go to my, my grandma will
be like, when am I going to see them kids?
Papa dies. Like when Papa dies, that's when
you'll see them. There is that like connection
too. And the thing about our grandpa

(49:36):
too, was, is like, I had, you know, my experience when I was
young and I was like, you know, there's a part of you that just
was like, that didn't happen. You're just that that didn't
happen because your brain doesn't want to believe that
shit. So I had told my sister about
it. Once again, you can't tell my
sister shit. And she's a fat bitch and I

(49:56):
gotta get on my fucking nerves. I love her because I have to.
But you know what I'm saying? I see, there it goes.
I love her because I have to. Wouldn't wouldn't help me if I
was in a fucking box on the sideof the road.
I don't fucking know. But I told her like what
happened when I was young. So of course, naturally she went
back and immediately told my grandpa that.

(50:17):
And this was like a couple months before he died.
So we're outside and he brings it up and he's like, why did you
tell your sister this? And I was like, oh, you know,
cuz I don't know. Yeah, well, you know what I'm
saying? Like I don't remember what I
said for him to say this, but heliterally confirmed that he did

(50:38):
that. And I was just like, that's the
wildest shit, bro. Cuz then like it's, it's now
real, like it's 100% real you asan adult here.
And that is different than you as a fucking 8-9 year old here
in that shit. Because now you know that that
what happened happened. And once again, like I was never
assaulted by my grandpa. Allegedly there were other

(51:00):
people that, well, I'm 100% surenow because, you know, you take
the allegedly away then, but I don't know where I was going.
That's the one thing about just like thinking about shit is I'll
just fucking lose it. But like he helped out a fuck

(51:21):
ton growing up. He was like literally a
pedophile was in my childhood, was the only person I could
fucking rely on. Yeah, so it does.
Like I will, I will be the firstperson to say.
I won't be the first person to say I don't know why I said I
will be the first person to say I will say that.
You know, I assume being a pedophile is just like being

(51:43):
attracted to like me, Hispanic, Hispanic woman with a big ass.
Like that's what I assume kids are to those guys, which is
obviously a sickness. Like it's obviously something's
fucking wrong with your brain. Like if you are, you don't think
so. If somebody's attracted
children, brother, I think there's something wrong going on
upstairs. Well, yeah, no, I think.
But I don't think it's comparable to you like in big

(52:05):
Latina booties. Like I think it's, I think it is
literally like it's like a powerdynamic and it's all these other
things. But it's not just like that's
you know your your interest likeit.
OK, Yeah, yeah, yeah. I see what you're saying now,
because essentially I'm saying like there's something mentally
wrong, but then there's nothing mentally wrong with like a like
in a Hispanic woman, big ass. Yeah, yeah, OK, I see what

(52:27):
you're saying right there. So I kind of fucked that part
up. You can't like, that's one of
the things is like, you like it.It'd be like absolving somebody
of like, well, I just like to, you know, strangle people until
they're not alive anymore. We can make ATV.
Show called The Good Pedophile. Like he he's attracted to
children, but he doesn't do anything.
You know what I'm saying? Well, that's what I like.
Heard that you know, it was on somebody else's podcast about
like some guy that he was like at the end of his life and he's

(52:48):
like he's like, is there anything?
And he's like, well, you know, I'm just proud of myself because
I'm like, I'm attracted to children and I made get through
without like actually doing anything.
And like, I mean, I'm sorry, like if that's your thing, then
like, but once we. Have one.
That's what I'm saying, though. Once you have 1-2 stories about
that happening now, that 100% means all right, that you get

(53:09):
hired for. There's one thing on those.
Yeah, there's one thing about having bad thoughts.
You could have thoughts every night of shooting up a school.
If you never shoot up a school, guess what?
You're not a bad person. No, you're not.
You're not a bad person. So if you seek help for
something that's wrong, you're not a bad person.
The moment, the moment you message a kid, go after a kid,
any of that shit, you deserve like it's great day.

(53:29):
Like it's and it's it's really hard.
I had a hair floating on my hat and I kept looking at it.
There might be another one. I don't fucking know.
Wife's and it was my wife's longhair too.
Do you see it? Look, it's on the tip of my
hand. Yeah, got it.
But it does suck too, because, you know, I have that experience

(53:50):
when I'm a kid. It's not like it was.
He was just doing it every day to everybody.
And it was like, ah, watch out for Paw Paw.
He's in the room now. You would hear, you would hear
whispers of it and shit like that.
And yeah, they're opportunistic.Right, they find the money and
then you have. Like this actually good grandpa.
Like if you think of grandpa things, he's broke.
Bro help me set up my. First bank account, which, you

(54:11):
know, help me like he helped me set up with the like the
employees Credit Union, help me get like when I was homeless,
help me get my fucking adult high school diploma and shit
like that. Like an actual person that would
like help family out and shit like that.
Like he was essentially, if you're thinking about just
grandpa things was a great grandpa.

(54:33):
And even when, like even when you have that, he's on his
deathbed, everything's out. Everybody's, you know, because
that's what happens. Like when someone passes away
like that, then the stories of what everybody else went through
comes to light. And then you're having this
conflicting thing where you're just like, fuck, like it's hard
for me to hate a guy because youhave two.
Different. Yeah, you have.

(54:53):
Versions of him, you have two different versions of them and
it's just it's a fucking, it's arough and it's a weird dynamic
to go through. And honestly, like I said, you
should not have contact with them, especially, you know, ones
if they've been charged. Like definitely that shit 100%
happened. Like I said with my grandpa
growing up, you have that experience when you're 8 or 9

(55:15):
years old, but you're like, maybe I could have fucked that
up. Like maybe maybe that was wrong.
Maybe I just fucking created that because you know of the
whispers that people said. And then to have that, you know.
Confirmed. Confirmed.
And then the shit you know from other family members come out
and shit like that. And you're watching a guy who
was the only person that would fucking help you out when you

(55:36):
were a kid dying. And you're, you're going through
all this shit about the, the evil shit that he did.
Like you, you found you found out the evil shit that he has
done to so many people. Like when on a scale that is
fucking almost like mind boggling fucking MSNBC shit,
like fucking a fucking 60 minuteepisode.

(55:57):
Like it's, it's just it's it's it's weird, man.
And well see the the. Thing that I've brought up when
you've talked about this before,though, is like and it's not
none of this is ever to absolve the actual perpetrator.
But like this is one of those things is like it's the chicken
and the egg scenario once again.And I I feel like this is like

(56:17):
most of life is like he probablywas not unscathed from his
childhood. Oh, no, no, no, no.
He. Went through, he went through.
So it's the breaking of the cycle.
And that's The thing is like that one guy in the podcast,
whatever that said, like, you know, like I've been attracted
to kids my whole life and I madeit through without doing
anything. That's how it gets broken.

(56:38):
But there's like so many people out there that they were hurt,
they were abused, and then they go on to perpetrate that same
thing. And that is where the cycle like
if it can be broken. And I'm not saying that like,
you know, if no kids were abusedfor the next 50 years, we won't
have pedophiles anymore. They're still sick people.
There's still things that are going to happen.
But a lot of that stuff comes from childhood trauma, things

(57:01):
that were done to them. They think.
And not even that they think it's OK.
It's like, almost like a, a weird way of like, I don't know
the, the science behind it, but like, he was probably abused,
you know, and then that causes issues with your mom and then
that puts you in a vulnerable position because your mom can't
actually defend you in the scenario.
And she doesn't necessarily defend against somebody.

(57:22):
Like, there's just so much. Packed into.
It and it's never saying like itwas OK what he did.
However, there's a reason behindwhy he was a perpetrator,
especially on that scale. Like how like what caused him to
have that fucked up brain that allowed him to think that any of
that was OK and then to do that to other people?

(57:44):
Yeah. And then we're going.
To stop so another, another instance of this bro there was
like Mike during his childhood. I was dip diving and ducking
like pedophiles around every corner bro.
So we're going to talk about my uncle and this this is the this
is the this is where like, I don't know, I guess cuz I never

(58:07):
also really you know, was like, I liked them, you know what I'm
saying? It was like it's just weird.
It's weird how you know family still reacts to those people
because you, you, you hear aboutpeople defend in the family
pedophile and that's like the that's crazy shit, man.
That's like that's weird. If you have to tell your
children, hey, don't wear this because someone's coming over,

(58:28):
bro. That person should not be
allowed at your fucking house. Like that is which you know,
once again, it's like like you said, there are people that are
going to want to break the cycle.
There are people that just like fucking they get fucked up by it
and they fucking they do it. That does not absolve them.
That does not make them a good person that does not fucking.
You don't then get to say, well,why I see why they I see why no,

(58:48):
no, like you, once you do that to somebody else, to a child,
especially you just you have in my belief, you have lost your
right to live. If you take away the innocence
of something, then you just don't deserve to be on this
planet anymore. But so my uncle and I do want to
tell the story correctly becausehe was found guilty.

(59:13):
There was a whole trial and everything.
So he was a weird mother fucker.Like he was the type of like
when we, me and my brothers wereover and his sons, like he would
just be watching pornography in the living room and our dad
would be over and he'd just be like, all right, this is normal.
I'm right, but this is not normal.
I'm going to go outside. So like he was always very, very

(59:37):
fucking weird. So well, and who just puts?
That on as like a like just to watch it like I mean, there's an
activity that you do with it to like, you know, make it come to
a conclusion like there's no climax to the right when I told
you guys. I was like, yeah, I was very
aware what sex was. It was like 5 or 6 years old.
I'd walk into a house and peoplewould just be watching porn
together. That's why like it's a family
thing. It's fucking weird, but one of

(01:00:00):
my cousins had a kid and he would watch them.
So the lady that my Uncle Mary, this was not my aunt.
This was like later, way later in his life.
She was like, there's something fucking weird going on.
And shout out to this lady because without her, like I
said, she's not the one that's going to defend somebody.

(01:00:20):
And then technically there's no relationship like blood
relationship to the to the kid. But she was like, there's
something fucking weird going on.
Maybe I don't know this guy as well as I do.
So she set up fucking cameras and caught what was going on,
the things that he was doing to his grandchild.
So he gets arrested and they're doing the whole court thing.

(01:00:42):
And my dad is just like, he did not do that stuff.
I just they are lying on him. They have made-up something.
So then he goes to court and he hears the recordings and shit
like that. So now he knows that and he's
just like, This is why I just fucking look, I'm not going to

(01:01:03):
sit here and judge like religious people.
I understand there are, you know, Christians out there that
are good. There's Muslims out there that
are just good people, but a lot of people do use like religion
to be just like, well, you know,he just needs to find God and he
needs to no, bro, like fuck no, no, that's not a that's not a
fucking this is not a you need to find God.

(01:01:24):
This is a, he is a terrible fucking person.
He did start off like he was like that after the the court
thing, but then like he would start saying shit like, Oh, I
miss my brother. That's that's wild.
That's wild. My brother to my knowledge is
not molested anybody. All he did was he just kept
asking me for money and I was like, listen, if you never
messaged me again in my life, I'm OK with that.
But to say that stuff and then to, I don't know, just be like,

(01:01:48):
well, you know, through God we can forget.
No, no, I'm not Listen, God can forgive people.
I cannot. And The thing is, is like.
That not to say that that personcan't ever like live a normal
life, but The thing is though, is like anybody that knows that
to like be cool with that and like accept it as but like I
could never look at somebody thesame way again.

(01:02:09):
So like they can find new peopleand, you know, not ever disclose
what happened and as long as they go through life, then yeah,
sure have a regular life after that.
But like, I'm sorry, like knowing that a kid was abused
and in the most horrific. Ways like I had the like I said
I can't really go in depth because it is something that

(01:02:30):
like legally happened. I don't want to get anything
wrong. Yeah, but to like I'm allergic
to lawsuits, but to. Like know that that damage was
done to a kid and multiple kids probably, and then be able to
look that person in the eye and be like, yeah, no, he changed.
He turned his life around. Like, no.
What's so funny too, is. With, you know, both sides of
the family, my mom's side and mydad's side.

(01:02:53):
Air quotes. Yeah, air quotes.
Dad's side is that like there were people that would do good,
like they would start, you know,being somewhat to what we would
consider successful and they'd move the fuck away.
Yes. And the whole, the whole thing
was, well, they're turning theirback on the family.
They forget where they came from.
Yes. And then you you have these like
misconceptions of people and then the shit comes out and

(01:03:14):
you're just like, Oh, well, that's the fucking.
Those are the normal people. Those are people that are like,
oh, dude, we are not cool with what the the shit that has been
going on. So it does give you a different,
what's the word perception. Yeah, perspective, perspective.
There we go. Perception.
Usually a different perspective on people that you grew up with,

(01:03:35):
bro. Like it there.
There's things that you can be told.
There's things that could come to light that the way you have
viewed your family all of your life can change in a fucking
millisecond. And it's the craziest shit.
But yeah, man, like, bro, that'sthat was just two instances of
pet. There's like 4-4 more like and

(01:03:55):
it's like rough, bro. And it was, I don't know, I was
really good about not putting myself in those situations.
Like I was like, OK, if I'm a hang around this person, it's
going to be in a place where like people are around like
during the like I'm like if somebody goes to a different
room, I'm not going in that room.
Yeah, you're going. With somebody to make sure that

(01:04:16):
you're always and it sucks to be10.
Years old and have to have that fucking like state of mind now
because that's your. Innocence, my grandpa.
Was different like that. He was the one that cuz like I
said, we had the moment when I was 8 and I was like, nothing
had happened before and I was like, I was like Brock, call the
fuck cops. And honestly, it's weird you ask
that fucking question like, and I guess he could be he could

(01:04:39):
understand that, you know, Mikeyain't fucking with that shit.
So after that too, like I still,I don't know why, but I was able
to understand that it was OK to be like I'd go to his house and
fucking crush cans. That's how I would get like
games. That's how I got a fucking
PlayStation, bro. You know how many cans you got a
fucking crush to get a fucking PS2 back in the day, bro, it was

(01:05:00):
a fucking it was a lot, bro. In New York, you'd.
Just turn them in and you get $0.05 each one.
No, we had to. Crush them.
And then it was by weight. Yeah.
No, we. I did that down here and I had a
55 gallon drum full and I took it and it was like 10 bucks and
I was like I'm not doing this anymore.
Like just not worth it. Bro, we would have a there and
you've seen my grandpa's house, we would have a mountain in that

(01:05:22):
one side. Now that it's like full of other
shit because he was like a fucking hoarder.
That whole thing was just a mountain of fucking cans he just
picked. That's all he bro.
That's all he like, he literallylike he would go cut down
people's trees. He worked for the city.
Like when somebody like died, hewould go in and clean up the

(01:05:42):
house and shit. So he had just like so much
fucking shit. Like I'm saying in his backyard,
there's like a treasure trove ofshit back there.
I just can't go through it because I'm afraid of snakes and
spiders and shit. But like, I knew it was, I still
knew it was OK. Some people I was like, Nah
because a, the aggressive ones would like fucking scare me

(01:06:04):
because I was like, especially being little.
I was like, you know, he's 17 years old because they have
those, they have those, He's 17 years old.
Like what if he was just like, Nah, fuck this shit, we're doing
it. And I was like, I can't fucking
get out of that situation. So there it's it's a weird, it's
weird growing up during that life.
Now, I do think that in those situations, I'm not saying like

(01:06:29):
a middle class and an upper class family do not have they
have those people, but they havelike kind of like more resources
to stop that shit And shit's like not like doesn't get like
normalized and stuff Where in the poor families it's you know,
I don't know how it works because I only have my poor
family to go off of. Well, and you entrust.
Your, your family amongst your family.

(01:06:51):
Like, so you like, you got to goto work, you got to do this.
And so like you drop a kid off at like, oh, you know, it's just
the uncle's house or whatever. And you know, the crazy thing is
though is if they had any inkling of that stuff going on,
but like what I was going to mention a little bit ago was
like. Even though.
You weren't abused in that way. Like your innocence was still

(01:07:14):
stolen and you were always on guard.
Like, and I don't know whether you're, you know, mom told you
to watch out for it or you just maybe like, I don't know how you
knew it, but like your innocencewas gone actually, because I
actually. Got assaulted when I was real
little, so I knew about it. So yeah, yeah.
So I knew about it. And I was like, hey, we don't
want to, like, do that. I guess I was like more aware of

(01:07:37):
the situation, yeah. And like, that's the craziest
thing. Wow, random.
What the fuck is that? Like how I got all these
pedophiles? Right.
Yeah, I got all these. Pedophiles right here that I
know of. All right, honestly more
comfortable with these pedophiles, all right, to know
to understand like, hey, there'sweird people.
And then it just fuck in it justhacked like I was like 5 or 6.

(01:07:58):
I can't, I don't I can't like mybrain won't like allow me to the
slide, the slide, yeah, the slide.
And then after like some shit came out, like I would have like
the the dream of that person there, but I was like, Nah, I
don't really give a fuck becauselike I could be like someone
would have those type of memories and shit where like

(01:08:20):
they block something out and they'll be like, I just got to
remember. I got to, I got to know what
happened. I'm just like, I'm cool.
Not I ain't got to unbury that shit.
I just fucking, I just not care like if he did it, he's in the
worst fucking place right now. Or, you know, they're dead or
they're just life karma almost, you know, I'm saying the

(01:08:42):
universe gave them all the shit,so why would I even, you know,
fucking care about that? Because in the end, technically
they got what they deserve so well and.
Just to wrap up the story on like what they were saying, like
my advice is if if you're friends with them on Facebook
and there was like a Facebook message or something like that,
then like it's kind of a little bit harder.

(01:09:03):
But if you're not friends with them and it just went into like
your message requests, you neverhave to answer it ever.
And also if you. Want to publicly say fuck fuck
you, you can do that. You could do that man.
If you got shitty family bro. Let everybody know that you
don't fuck with somebody you don't fuck.
Like once again just because yougrew up with people and they are

(01:09:24):
blood related that does not givethem a right to be shitty to
you. That does not give them a right
to treat you poorly to hurt you and shit like that.
You were allowed to say fuck youto people and anybody that
doesn't have your back when you say fuck you to the person that
has hurt you they don't deserve or even if they didn't.
Abuse you or anything like that like you can still right yeah
just. Like just a shitty person once

(01:09:46):
again. Like if you say fuck you to that
person and there's people in your family that don't have your
back or they, they, they talk down about you, then you also
know those people don't deserve your, your love and shit like
that. Well, and I think that's one of.
The best things that you've talked about is how, how like,
it doesn't matter whether you'refriends, family or anything.

(01:10:06):
Like the people that fuck with you are the people that fuck
with you. Yeah, there's a longy.
Like, this one's pretty long too.
I think that one's for. Oh, that's AITA.
We can say that for two daddies,yeah, it's a.
Submission from one of our listeners.
Look at that, I guess. That gets the people who haven't
went from here to two daddies over there to listen.
OK, so we got. Two of them then cuz I think
this one no. This one should I put to get my

(01:10:28):
job? This one asked.
Three yeah, look at that, 3 little ones.
Yeah, All right, sorry we went off on a pedophile pedophile
rant. But once again, I think.
But that's a crazy thing too, though, is to go through all
that and they're like, there's never been a moment where I've
looked at a kid and was like delicious, like there's not I've
not had that situation. So once again, when people are

(01:10:49):
like, well, you know, he went through it, bro.
That does not give you any fucking excuse.
No, like you get no, no sympathyfor me.
So like I, I. Can see where it it could cause
people to have that the second you.
The second you act. Upon anything, people go through
trauma. Differently yes, I will say that
still it doesn't matter what fucking mental illness you had

(01:11:10):
like oh, we went through the whole tangent about like, you
know how how rough shit is for me, for me to let down to allow
my mental illness to like let down my family let down Dylan or
something like that. That's not cool.
Like that's not honestly mental illness.
That's your thing, bro. Like that's the thing you carry
around. You can find help for it.
You cannot find help for it. If you then choose to not find

(01:11:30):
help for it is not OK to then allow that.
Even if you do find help for it,it's not OK for that to bring
other people down. Yeah, it's you still.
Got consequences and you still got.
Responsibilities and shit and you're not absolved from that
stuff. I am also not speaking on shit
like schizophrenia, shit that actually like you need.
To seek help for all this stuff,well I mean even like.

(01:11:51):
That's just rough. That's rough.
And things we cannot speak on onthis podcast because we don't
have that type of like the absolutely.
You cannot decipher reality fromfiction.
I don't want anybody to hear this podcast and be like, you
know what, I could choose not todo my medication.
And no, no, definitely. There are people out there.
People will tell you that therapy is shit.

(01:12:14):
Therapy is shit for people who don't need therapy.
Yeah, that's it. Therapy is shit for people who I
think they need therapy well andthere's probably bad.
Therapists too. I mean, you don't know just cuz
you had a therapist and it didn't work, right?
Yeah. Therapists are normal fucking
people that honestly go through their own bullshit and that is
why if you are talking to a medical professional and you're

(01:12:35):
like this person's not helping, get a new one.
Get a new one. It's like you go fix, get your
car fixed and it comes back and it's not actually fixed.
You don't be like let. Me just keep sending it to him
every week until he fucking figures it out.
You. You.
Find. A new mechanic because they are
once again the the process to getting to become a therapist is

(01:12:56):
a lot easier the process you know and there's a lot more
people doing it and there are a lot of people that are dealing
with their own shit that actually that that do it and it
is it is something to that is definitely something you don't
just all right the first person I've met if they do a really
really good job yes keep them ifthey are just they don't you
don't feel like you're. Progressing.

(01:13:17):
They don't feel like you're. Yeah, you're progressing.
Or they're, you know, trying to help.
Definitely seek somebody else out.
The title is How to Have a Better Relationship with my
Teenage Brother. Dear Mike and Dylan.
I said, OK, I'll read it. I'll read it, right.
Dear Dylan and Mike, he fucked it up all right.
I thought I'd switch things up and keep you on your toes.

(01:13:38):
Mike hates. It.
I don't know. It's a, it's a joke Look,
honestly, Dylan and Mike is how people should do it because I
believe in going alphabetical order.
That's what I said. In the beginning, but it makes
way more sense. Mike and Dylan, I am. 19 and my
brother is 16. When we were kids we used to
play all the time and fight all the time but when I became a
teenager we drifted apart. Probably mostly my fault

(01:13:59):
honestly. Then I moved out for two years
and now I live at home again andit's just really awkward.
And then or I want to be friendswith him again but every time I
try to connect with him he just kind of gives me a wall.
Me and my other brother 13 get along great and he's like a mini
version of me but I just don't know how to be a better Big
Brother to the 16 year old. Oh God.
And not to mention he is so entitled and always leaves my

(01:14:20):
car on empty when he borrows it among other things.
But I want to keep this short. I love your podcast so much.
The last advice of mine you readwas actually very helpful.
Thanks. Those oh make those 911 moon pie
shirts. I need one.
We got to make some. We do listen.
We got to sell some shit. This is what people don't.
Understand they'll be like, oh come out with merch for this.
OK, think of a shirt. OK, if I were to go get 100

(01:14:46):
shirts made, there are 7 fuckingsizes Sway, I'm fucking that up.
Small, medium, large, extra. Yeah, small, medium, large,
extra large, 2XL3XL. So there's 6 at first we.
Started with 7 but we yeah, it was like.
Fuck, we're sorry guys. We got we got to cut this off at
some point. So then you got to divide that

(01:15:10):
up. Yeah, it was like.
It was like look purchase intense is is very expensive so.
A funny thing that's to that's to my big big.
Boys. All right, guys, look, be big,
be voluptuous. Don't let it impact your health.
Once we get up to like the 4X, man, I want to see us trying to
trying to improve a little bit. Yeah, been reining in a little
bit. All right, so one of the funny
things. Was is we when we ordered the

(01:15:31):
stickers because like we packaged all of them into
packaging and we had sizes from extra small to 3X because they
didn't have like a 4X in that combo.
And so I told Mike I was like, would it be funny if I just
stick the extra small stickers on the 4X?
Yeah. And so I did.
So like the the 15 people, they got 4X shirts, they got extra

(01:15:52):
small stickers on their 4X shirts.
But yeah, you have to. Do you have to do six of those?
And that's for every single shirt that comes out now.
Also that 6 does not break down.Like you could just get an even
amount. You have to do it on a fucking.
There's a ratio yeah on a curve that you have to do it on and if
you get it wrong cuz you have toorder like when you when you go

(01:16:14):
to right when you get shirts made.
We don't fucking they're not print on demand shirts.
Labor line was not like they're made locally.
We know the people who fucking you know, print the shirts.
Me and Dylan are out there fucking like God, going back to
places being like, hey, this is wrong.
And they're like, oh, OK, we'll fix this.
And then they fuck it up again. Listen, brother, we're trying to

(01:16:34):
sell. We're trying to give people good
quality shit, fucking fix it. But when you do stuff like that,
like it's, it's very fucking difficult because they want to
run out. You have to get more, but you
have to order on a thousands. To, like, run a new shirt.
Yeah, it's. Thousands of dollars to run.
It's just very, very difficult and so.
Right now we're sitting on a bunch of 1st edition because we
really thought that it was just going to do gangbusters from the

(01:16:55):
beginning and it's done good like people have supported.
However, we still have $10,000 worth of clothes.
Absolutely 1st edition still sitting over there because and
maybe we just sucked at our designs.
I thought the designs were pretty good but I'm no that's
really shit on. Designs, I think it's just the
marketing. And Mike doesn't really like to
market to you guys and to his audiences on the other platforms

(01:17:19):
like he, and rightfully so. Like he doesn't want to just be
like, I buy my shit all the time.
Right? Well, I didn't get into comedy
because I was like, man, I couldn't fucking sell people a
lot of stuff with my comedy. I was like, I just want to make
people laugh. Yeah.
And and then the platforms pay us, but they don't pay.
They do not, man. They don't.
They hate paying us. We thought that the the clothes
were going to be a good thing. But right now we are offering

(01:17:39):
30% off all labor llama stuff. MADHD is the code 30.
M ADHD30 yeah but for this advice right here, the reason
that you are not connecting withyour 16 year old brother is
because he is 16 way more. Interested.
In other things that are happening than his older brother
well and it happens. It happens.
You literally said like you fucking during that time you got

(01:18:03):
away from hanging out with him during that age and that's just
going to happen, man. And he listen, either he's going
to get through all this and he'sgoing to be your brother again
and you are going to be as thickas thieves.
But when you're 16 years old, a 16 year old boy, brother, what
the fuck are you thinking about?Pussy pussy video.
Games like Right Yeah, hanging out with.
Friends smoking Doo Doo weed like that that's what the fuck

(01:18:26):
you give a fuck about you don't yeah you know like man I don't
want to go to the park with my brother fuck that shit I want to
hang out with bitches when you said that he's.
Entitled. Like, I'm sorry, but like he's
16. Really.
Be self. Self reflective here, were you
not entitled yourself during that time because 13 year old?
Brother's about to go through that too.
They start thinking that they'rea grown.
They know every man. Yeah, I know how to do
everything, bro. It ain't shit to life.

(01:18:47):
It's so fucking easy right now and it just happens.
And then there's after after that point of he gets through
all this stuff and he there's going to come a point where life
smacks him in the face and says,you don't know shit.
You thought, you think you have this all figured out.
Wow, this is in layers. Still going through that.
Yeah, and they're just. Like, and then they, you know,

(01:19:08):
that's when you see who really has your back in life, because I
guarantee you your brother's surrounded by all these guys
that he thinks he's going to be friends with forever and
everything's going to be sweet. And then life happens and life
gets hard. And that's when you really find
out the people who's going to bethere for you, the people that
are going to fuck with you. And that's, you know, if you got
a good brother, do you fall backon them?
If you got good friends, you know, you fucking fall back on

(01:19:29):
them. And then essentially, you know,
the friend group that you're hanging out with when you're 16
years old is really expansive and that shit starts shrinking
down because those are people that would not, they don't want
to go through the fire with people they don't want.
They just want to hang out and have fun.
And once shit gets hard, well, they'll just switch to somewhere
else to hang out and have fun. But he's going through the

(01:19:49):
moment of his life where he is more concerned with other
things. He's going to find out like
eventually that life is not so sweet.
It is very hard. And I guarantee you get within
four years. He'll be your best bud again.
Do you know that That's like? Biological, or at least I've
heard that it's biological like that.
Like there's a reason why kids think like older people are

(01:20:10):
stupid and that they don't know anything and like that they need
to just get away from their family.
It's basically so that like, sayyou were in like a tribe, you
would want to leave that tribe so that like basically your
genetics go and mix with not theclose tribe so that like you're
continuously like expanding the genetics rather than like

(01:20:32):
inbreeding. And so there's like a science
between like when kids go through puberty and finally
decide that they're going to become like sexually active and
like want to have kids and all that stuff.
Like it's so that you don't stayin that little circle and like
basically pollute the pool with just staying in that.
I watch the tik. T.O.K I feel like honestly, I

(01:20:53):
feel like I am far right when I watch a like a TikTok and then
it's like a goofy conspiracy andI'll be like, wow, that sounds
possible because I do no research in it.
That's why I just feel like the far, far right because they like
to do that. They like to read the memes and
just be like, oh fuck, this is real.
I saw one that was like, you know people, we're the only
things on this planet that the sun fucks us up.

(01:21:17):
Like the sun fucks us up. If you're out in the sun, you
can get fucking cancer and shit like that and it fucking burns
your skin and shit. We can't just drink water.
Like fucking animals can just walk up.
Polluted water doesn't matter. Just go up and fucking drink it.
We do that, we get fucking discetary.
We're shitting ourselves. So we got to like boil the water
and shit like that. We are so not adapted to this
Earth. And he was like, what if aliens

(01:21:39):
dropped us off here? And I'm just like, boom, there
it is. We're aliens.
We're the aliens. And then aliens would just,
they'd be us. Like the spaceship would come by
and just be some dudes like, youguys ever tried mushrooms?
Yeah, we got them here. We do DMT every.
I really enjoyed. That one it was it was really
good. The only thing that threw a

(01:21:59):
wrench in that is a black people.
I was like, they have adapted tothe sun.
So that kind of does throw a wrench into his fucking.
It was a nice little conspiracy for the white person theory.
Yeah. For the for the 10 minutes that
watched it, I used to watch ancient.
Aliens all the time just becauselike it's like a funny like, you
know, like junk food type show. And I'm like not that I believe

(01:22:24):
that the aliens built the pyramids or anything like that,
but like then it got so like they were running out of shit to
talk about and so then they're like in this.
Could it be ancient alien physicist or whatever the Yeah,
I want to take a. Second though for my people on
the far right, I do want to say I love y'all.
OK I shit on I shit on the left and the right just not as

(01:22:47):
someone that dislikes you or hates you.
But is there someone I'm like the disappoint.
I just want to see everybody do better yeah and and get along
OK, AI be fucking y'all up man. Y'all are the only ones that be
sharing AI and be like look at this.
And it was like a Starbucks commercial and it was like
scenes from a Starbucks commercial where it's like a
cult thing and there there's like a effigy there and I was

(01:23:08):
like yeah guys it's a fucking AI.
Like 34,000 comments and I'm like bro we are.
But if it supports. Your narrative cooked, yeah.
Yeah, yeah. And like I said, I'm not saying
it out of hate. I still love you.
I still fuck with you. I am not honestly, there's not a
lot of things that you could tell me that you are that you
hold as like value or whatever that's going to be like, Oh, I

(01:23:30):
don't fuck with this. This is crazy.
And if you're like, look, well, it's part of my family values
that I touch kids now that doesn't like like I said, if you
I don't give a fuck what your beliefs are.
I respect, you know, people's religions.
I respect their values. You know, their fucking their
cultural things. And I know people like to joke
around and say why people don't have, they have cultural things

(01:23:50):
that they fucking that they do and that they value and shit
like that. I still fuck with you.
Once again. I just believe that we all can
do better, that we all can get along way better than what we're
doing now and that there is there is an enemy to people, but
it's not the people that are fucking being oppressed.
It's not us, Bill Bird. Did it was like on a subway just

(01:24:10):
recently and it was like his take on something.
And so they're sitting there with these cards with their
little mics on them and talking about stuff.
And he brought up, and I know you said that he's far left and
he might be, but like one of thethings that he was saying, he's
like, you know, like Californians hate Texans and
Texans hate, you know, Californians and like, it's all

(01:24:32):
this stuff. And like one of the points that
he brought up that I think is sovalid is like the left saying
when they're like, you know, youcan, you can just disown anybody
that ever voted for Trump, Like you don't ever have to talk to
him. And like he's like, that's the
problem is like, you know, it's,it's no longer like we're all
Americans. Like technically a Californian

(01:24:52):
is American, a Texas Texans, an American.
And like that's where like things have just broken down
completely is because there's nomore just like, Hey, we're
Americans and then we are a Texan or we're a Californian.
But that doesn't like absolve usfrom being we're Americans.
Like we are all in this together.
The thing is and. What I try to explain to people
too, is because I that's the goofiest shit when when people

(01:25:15):
on the left are like, you can absolutely like you, you don't
love them anymore and you cast them out of your life and shit
like that. That's so fucking wild.
Because look, I do not agree with the deportation thing.
I don't OK, That's fucking if you don't like hearing that
boohoo, you can boohoo somewhereelse.
I don't give a fuck, OK? That is not someone just saying,
oh, you know what? I don't fucking like Mexicans.

(01:25:37):
Get them out of here. That's not someone thinking
that. That is the media everyday
saying they're coming over here and killing, killing, you know,
our children. And they're they're fucking,
they're raping and they're they're fucking doing drugs and
all this shit. The same thing every single
other fucking race is doing at an incredibly higher rate than a
bad person from Mexico that cameover here is doing.

(01:25:59):
Every single race fucking does that.
But if the media harps on it every single fucking day and
that's all someone's exposed to,guess what?
They are going to believe that the reason that this country is
bad is because there's Mexicans here that didn't say hey, I'm
coming over. Well, and a lot of them aren't.
Sneaking across the border, theycome over for a work visa and
they don't go back home. Like there's, there's a million

(01:26:19):
ways that they got here. And like, yes, probably.
Let me finish my point. But if you have someone like
that, that's telling aside this over and over and over again,
that's going to have people believe in that this is a
fucking problem. But then for you to go, well,
I'm just not going to like that person and I'm never going to
speak to them again because of that.

(01:26:40):
What the fuck are you doing? Like you, you're not, you're not
changing shit. If you have something that is
telling, it's the same somethingthat's telling you guys not to
like this. And it's the same something
that's telling them not to like something.
And that's what's creating the the divide in America.
And no matter how much you don'ttalk to a single person over
there or don't talk, you're not going to create any change doing

(01:27:02):
that until you're able to changethe thing that's telling people
what they should, how they should feel, what they should
think. And it's doing it on both sides.
Whether you fucking like to think so or not, it is doing it
on both sides to create separation.
Until you are able to change that thing, nothing will ever
change. See if if we're.
Gonna talk about the regulation of alcohol and gambling in the

(01:27:24):
last episode. I could get behind we the people
deciding that like 24 hour news has to go away like the fucking
Murdoch just. Busting through the door beats
Dylan to death with a baseball bat.
MSNBC. Fox News, CNN, fucking America,
like all these like all the fucking news channels just get
rid of on Spotify. I have no idea.

(01:27:46):
Let's got a doubt it. I bet the parent company that on
Spotify now. Oh no, we're up.
Is all done Murdoch. We're never.
Going to reach that 10,000 hours.
Yep, because. He he fucking, he owns every
like fucking Fox, CNN, all of them really.
Yep, the parent company that owns them is owned by Murdoch.

(01:28:06):
That's what's crazy man. That dude just like fucking
anything. He's like Thanos.
I don't know how the guy is. He could be an all right person.
I just don't. I just don't believe when you
own everything and whatever story is whatever my thing is is
I don't think. And here's the thing, because
people will have their conspiracies.
I don't think the media is inherently evil.

(01:28:29):
I don't think their goal, like they're all in goal was like,
look, we're going to separate everybody.
So it's really fucking control them and get away with anything.
I think the media was just like we want people to watch and the
only way people are going to watch is a shit is crazy and
doom and gloom and the the craziest shit you ever fucking
saw and then a byproduct. Is and then a byproduct?
That is, is the government go, oh, now we can do whatever we

(01:28:50):
want because the media has them so God damn fucking divided that
we can fucking start playing offof that.
So yeah, I believe, I don't fucking know.
I just think we're fucked. Look, look, let's just we can
coup d'etat, all right? Y'all can.
Look, I got a bad knee, all right?
Y'all go out there and fight, and I'll be supporting you from
the South. Yeah.
Whoever wins, just just wins. All I know is, is that if you

(01:29:14):
truly, if you truly believe in your heart of hearts that
nothing can be solved and you'relike, I, I want to rebel against
the man. All these look, little countries
that are like fending off these super fucking rich first world
countries should tell you, you got a fighting chance, brother.
Like when Russia and Ukraine started fighting, I was like,
oh, man, a week, yeah, a week. And there's not going to be

(01:29:36):
Ukraine. And Ukraine was just like, we
just got some sticks and some drones.
We just start fucking up. And I'm like, what?
Like it is, it's very fucking hard.
And I don't know. Well, they did get a lot of.
Support from many different nations.
God damn it, Joe. Biden like at a point I was
like, yeah, it's cool to help everybody out.
I was like, God damn, like we'rehungry too, buddy.
We're hungry too buddy, but we got 2.

(01:29:58):
More to get through there. Yeah, yeah.
Fuck, I set the paper down. I'm glad I didn't set it over
there. Yeah, cuz we got all right.
So this one says. Am I the asshole?
Am I the asshole? I got my wife on sick meds
because I couldn't stand walkingon egg shells anymore and we
have a three-year old that constantly had her mom yell over
the dumbest stuff. In my opinion we are buying a
house while we stay with my mom.My mom also felt like she had to

(01:30:20):
walk on egg shells. My wife kept talking about
putting boundaries on my mom andher own house.
Then she started saying things to me and my mom was trying to
poison her or she started they they thought they thought that
him and his mom were trying to poison her.

(01:30:40):
Now she is on meds. She has chilled out.
Fuck you, you fucking you fucker.
What She chilled out but mad because she has to be on meds.
But I tell her it's a little selfish not to be on meds and to
be OK with how she acts in frontof people.
I feel like going out and getting drunk and saying I like
it so I'm going to do it more because I become an ass when I

(01:31:04):
drink just to show her it's not fair for people around me if I
do the same thing you do when you stop taking your meds.
There's not a singular, not one.I just, period.
Paste it comma. Exclamation point.
There is nothing in there brother.
I don't know what the fuck I just read so.
So basically. His wifes acting like a butt and

(01:31:26):
being real aggressive. They live at his mom's house.
She's being a butt to her. She thinks they're trying to
poison her and then he's saying that he's going to start
drinking and acting like an asshole so that she can see what
it's like when she gets off of her meds.
My take on it is like, y'all need some therapy.
Like legit like you, you. She probably needs to talk to
somebody. You need to talk to somebody.

(01:31:47):
Cuz like, yeah, you shouldn't belike forcing your wife on the
medicine. Also she shouldn't be an
asshole. But like y'all need to work that
out. And like, I'm sorry for your mom
that you brought this whole situation into her house.
Like hurry up and get your houseand move out and like get your
therapy because ultimately it doesn't sound like a healthy
situation for anybody involved. You, your wife, your mom, your

(01:32:10):
kid, I'm. Just going to let Dylan on that
one because my brain could not fuck comprehend what he was
asking. Like I could not, I just
couldn't wrap my head around that story.
It was it was fucking me up. So the next one says UFC.
Hey Mike and Dylan, I just wanted to talk a little bit
about the UFC since Mike also likes it.
What do you think about Jon Jones retiring?
And who do you got winning between Charles Oliveira and

(01:32:32):
Ilya Taporia? Also, the UFC contract start at
12:00 and 12:00 for your first two fights.
I think you mentioned fighter pay in a recent pod.
So I thought I'd say that I've watched every single episode on
both podcasts. Keep it up.
I don't think it's, I don't think it's.
They start at 12:00 and 12:00 because I think someone just got
8 and 8 like. It might vary at one of the

(01:32:54):
fight. Nights how big of a.
Crowd, you're like how it might differ.
It might differ between like it being a Fight Night, it being a
fucking fight island card, it being a fucking.
Pay for it so. What do you think about 'cause
there's multiple, there's two questions, John Jones.
All right, What do you think about John Jones retiring?
All right, so here's the thing about John Jones.

(01:33:15):
I used to stand so hard for JohnJones.
There is no way that I would have been like, he is not the
greatest fighter ever. And this the reason that we
start to stand somebody is is like nostalgia, all right.
Even though John is technically just retired, we viewed him as
an active fighter. That man has been retired for

(01:33:37):
essentially a year and a half now since he fought Steep A.
So you got to put it into perspective.
Like I said, we have the nostalgia.
There are things that you cannotoverlook when it comes to Jon
Jones. Did Jon Jones clear out the
light heavyweight division in a way we had never seen before?
Yes. I also think that adds a lot to

(01:33:58):
it is of how he did it. But when you think of the run
of, you know, Shogun, Lyoto Machida, Vitor Belfort, Chael
Sonnen, when you think about Rashad Evans, think about that
55 fight span right there. And that's really when people
are like that. He cleared out the division.

(01:34:20):
Shogun did not did not fight John Jones in shape.
And he had a problem of not being conditioned in his fights.
Like when he first came to the UFC, he was dealing with an
injury, but he had a problem with not being conditioned in
his fights. Rampage and Rashad.
Rampage was kind of he's he's a veteran, he's on, you know, the
twilight of his career. And Rashad after the, you know,

(01:34:46):
I'm not here to because all these guys were greats and, and
in my in my mind, they are, you know, greats.
But Lyoto, once every people figured out his style, it was
figured out like he people were so just in awestruck of his, you
know, karate stance, leaning back.
People didn't know how to fucking engage with him.
And then they were like, Oh, if I just let this guy come in,
that's my opportunity. Don't go in on him.

(01:35:07):
He was a poor man's Anderson Silva essentially, which
Anderson, like he could counter you like no one else.
The the craziest counters ever. But then if you if you if you
didn't engage him, he'd just beat the fuck out of you.
Like he would just chop you down.
So Leota didn't have that aspect.
So when when people figured out Leota Machida, it was a lot
easier to beat him. Then you kind of get into the

(01:35:27):
newer age where he's, you know, fighting, you know, Gustav's and
you know, Anthony Smith, Reyes, those kind of guys.
Once again, I'm not taking anything away.
He lost that fight to Alexander Gustafson.
I said it during when I love JonJones the most.
So even going through this thingwith Tom Aspinall, he lost that

(01:35:48):
fight. All right, The Reyes, I don't
believe he lost the Reyes fight.I think he out pointed Reyes.
I do think that a man with a fucked up knee took him to the
absolute brink of destruction. So then you go to the
heavyweight division and you fight Serogon, who I don't
think. I think he is just like, listen,

(01:36:10):
we're going to train today. I do not want to do any of that
grapple stuff. If you touch me with your sweaty
body, I'm going to scream and cry because he has zero ground
game whatsoever. If you were absolutely
manhandled on the ground by Francis Zingano, all right, you
don't have a ground game. So we all knew what was going to
happen there. If John just took him to the
ground, he's going to be a wet noodle.
John is absolutely the best grappler that we have seen,

(01:36:33):
especially towards the heavier end of the division.
And then to fight Steep A who I mean, should have walked in
there on a Walker. A lot of Jon Jones is
overinflated. So then we're going to talk
about someone else too, who around the same time, Daniel

(01:36:56):
Cormier, we know that Jon Jones beat him twice.
You could say 1 was for, you know, 1 was a no contest for
PEDs, but he finished DC in thatfight.
DC destroyed the light heavyweight division.
He fought, you know, heavyweightbecause he was in heavyweight

(01:37:16):
way before he was a light heavyweight.
I know he fought Barnett and allthem guys down and fucking
Bigfoot all in Strikeforce. So with what he did in the
heavyweight division and in the light heavyweight division, I
value that more than what Jon Jones did in the light
heavyweight and in the heavyweight division.
And I know it sounds crazy, but once you pop for something that

(01:37:37):
you take to be better than you could possibly be, I can no
longer say the things that you did were great like I can't
because you're taking performance enhancers to beat
other guys who are not Daniel Cormier ain't that man ain't
fucking look at him. Well, he might have fucking put
his hand on a towel to to weigh less, but he can't take no

(01:37:58):
performance and answers. And and once you have someone
who who pops multiple times, notjust one time John and Bob just
one time fucking you can pick a grandma nut sack.
Once you have that, you just can't, you're not considered the
best anymore. So what we did was we watched a
guy who should have retired a while ago waste 2 two years of a

(01:38:21):
man's prime who is going to be agreat in his division.
And once again, Jon Jones did great things in the 205 LB
division, things we will probably never see again, a
level of dominance we will neversee again.
You can't then look at me and say, well, he never did steroids
during that because he has done steroids.
So I can't register him any higher than, you know, should he

(01:38:42):
be the best pound for pound bestfighter ever?
Yeah, but he can't. Sorry, he did steroids.
Charles Oliveira versus Ilya Taporia.
Look, I could tell you all day long that Charles is bigger.
Ilya got dropped in his first fucking and his other
lightweight belt. You can't.
You can't. I don't know.
He punches people really fuckinghard.
That's it. Like he fucking and he's good at

(01:39:04):
doing it. You can't can't tell you who is
going to win. Charles is good, but Ilya,
people will be like there's no chance for him to win and then
he knocks out the other guy thatthey just said the man can
fucking hit. He's probably the best boxer,
the best striker right now with his hands in the UFC, best
boxer. So if it goes to the ground,

(01:39:25):
does Charles have a chance? I don't know how much Ilya's
been tested on the ground. He is fucking ridiculously hard
to get down. But if I had to take somebody,
I'm going to take the guy who keeps saying who everybody keeps
betting against and then he knocks out the other guy who's
they're like, whoa, that guy's way too good for you to be.
He can't beat Volk, He can't beat Max Holloway.
And then he fucking does it. So I'm I'm just not going to bet

(01:39:45):
against him. But yeah, I do be love in the
UFC, though a little bit. I do I'm I'm super casual
though, Like I do not have time to watch PFL fucking Bellator.
I used to back in the day. I used to watch fucking
everything before there was fucking.
PFL, you know, we had Bellator, World Series of fighting, the

(01:40:06):
UFC, obviously. What else do we have?
I couldn't get Dream. I didn't know.
I didn't even know what the fuckDream played on.
And that was more of a Japanese promotion.
After Pride died, Yeah, I think I watched.
Like 15 years ago and watched for like a year or two and then
watched like The Ultimate Fighter and all that, and then
kind of just stopped. Ultimate Fighter was doped.
Though, man, and I got a lot of a lot of odds on it.

(01:40:28):
I remember Rampage. Back in the day on that like he
was training people or like he was, he was coming up through
it, right? Yeah, he was one of the.
Coaches he was coaching against the first one.
Has he done it twice? I remember there was shot Evans
one just cuz that one had Kimbo slice in it.
So yeah, I remember that. So cuz I.
Used to watch. Bum fights all the time.
Back in the day, yeah. Roy Nelson.
Won that one by knocking out Brandon Schaub.
And that was the first time I ever lost money betting somebody

(01:40:51):
cuz I was like, bro, look at Brandon Schaub like he is this
big dude. Like he, he can move around a
lot versus a fat guy. He's fat.
Like that's it. He's fat and can wrestle people.
And by knockout I didn't think that I was like, maybe he'll
like wrestle him. TKO just fucking bounces a
fucking hook right off the back of Shab's head like.

(01:41:12):
And that was all she wrote. I was like, how so?
Because my friend was like, yeah, I think Roy Nelson's going
to win. And I was like, you're well, I
mean, I wasn't just like 100% onjob.
I was like, yeah, if he can defend Roy's takedowns, which I
think from the time that the show ended till now, that's all
he's worked on is takedown defense and shit like that.

(01:41:36):
But look, people shit on shop. He was he was a good fighter.
And if you ever got mad at him in a public area and wanted to
fight him, I would highly adviseyou not like, I don't care what
you think about his comedy. Once again, you know my
perspective on a comedian. If there's a bunch of people
that find him funny, they're a comedian, whether you like him
or don't like him. I'm just saying there's some

(01:41:58):
comedians like Matt Rife. If you don't like Matt Rife and
you was like, look, I'm a talk shit to him.
I can see that. Don't do it to shop.
All right, but I think this has been a good episode of M ADHD.
What do you think? Great.
All right, yeah, if you guys would like for us to answer some
advice in your life, you can go to mikeanddylan.com, MIKEANDDY,
lan.com to submit just a story, something you would like advice

(01:42:23):
on. Also give us a.
Call on our voicemail number. We can put that on the air as
well. That's all.
Mike and Dylan too, The voicemail number.
We could play the voicemail. I suggest when you do it,
though, let's not do it while we're driving down the road in a
car. Let's be in like a area maybe
that's quiet, no wind, no wind coming so we could put it on
there. We've had submissions, but guys,

(01:42:43):
you got to stop doing it in a car because then it's just can't
understand it, guys. And then buy some.
Labor llama so we can make those911 moon pie shirts. 911 Moon.
Pie shirts, Yeah, if we if we get through this stuff, we are
going to start doing the the Mike and Dylan merch.
I don't think any. I don't think we got any fucking
fun things going on on 2 daddies.

(01:43:04):
No, these two new episodes. No, I mean with the with the
inside jokes. Oh no.
Yeah, we ain't. We ain't got.
One of those yet guys. Mayonnaise Dick.
Mayonnaise. Dick is here, I know, and
that's. Why I said it.
So there was. Oh yeah, because.
Don't fall the mass is going to be upset, but look guys, we'll
see you next time Oh wait wait, leave us a fucking rate the
podcast all right, share it share it to a friend no more

(01:43:25):
than anything rate it because when people look at podcasts
yeah, but we got. Ratings, we need shares.
No, we're, we're popping. Up in the big guy stuff like
like in fucking the big podcasters stuff.
So when someone clicks on us andthey only see like, you know,
99, there's like this is just a fucking so if we had a lot more
of those people do fuck with that man.
That is a thing they view. They're like, oh, this is a good

(01:43:46):
podcast because it has a lot of I don't know why.
All right, we'll do it all. Yeah, do it, do it, do it.
All do it live. See you next time guys later.

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He's AFRAID of the SKY?!?! | MADHD Ep 31 |

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.css-14f5ked{margin:0;word-break:break-word;display:-webkit-box;-webkit-box-orient:vertical;box-orient:vertical;-webkit-line-clamp:2;overflow:hidden;}He's AFRAID of the SKY?!?! | MADHD Ep 31 |