Episode Transcript
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Speaker 1 (00:17):
Hey, I'm Lemon.
I am just like you, sisterfriend.
Talk about stepping into thatoverflow that God has for us by
becoming those ultimate Proverbs31 women.
Hey, I'm Lemon.
I am just like you, sisterfriend.
I knew God had something morein store for me, but I couldn't
see a way out of the laundrypiles and, frankly, I resented
that.
Proverbs 31 woman.
How was I going to live up tothe hype?
(00:39):
That is until I found out howto really step into becoming
this Proverbs 31 woman throughleadership development.
In this podcast you're going tofind financial freedom,
leadership, growth andmotivation so you'll be able to
do all the things God has calledyou to do with ease and really
step into that land of milk andhoney.
Welcome back to the Milk andHoney podcast.
(01:00):
I'm your host, lemon Price, andtoday I have my friend, crystal
, and I'm really excited.
Actually, I found Crystal onTikTok like a year ago maybe,
and I was, so I was justobsessed with her and what she
was doing.
And so she talks about she'ssober living and she's a sober
coach and she works withChristian women to embrace this
sobriety and unlock their truepurpose.
(01:22):
And so she has had her ownbattles with binge drinking and
that is really what brought herhere.
Is God bringing her throughthis?
And so she approacheseverything through a biblical
and practical lens, so women canbreak free.
Speaker 2 (01:36):
So thank you, my
friend, for being here.
Thank you for having me.
I'm super excited to be here.
Speaker 1 (01:42):
I'm super excited.
I really was like obsessed withyour story and just hearing you
kind of talk about the thingsyou've been through.
So for everybody who doesn'tknow, can you tell everybody a
little bit about your historyand how you kind of arrived here
?
Speaker 2 (01:55):
Yeah, definitely.
I'll share it in a nutshell.
So I was never physicallyaddicted to alcohol, but I got
close so I was.
Speaker 1 (02:04):
My friend, I have
been obsessed with you and your
story for literally probably ayear now.
For those who don't know yourhistory, new background.
Would you share a little bit ofyour story with us?
Speaker 2 (02:15):
Yeah, absolutely I.
When it comes to drinking, Iwas more so a binge drinker, so
I was never physically addictedto alcohol, but I did get really
close to that.
And so I was the kind of girlthat Monday through Friday I
would work out, I would go towork, I would do what I had to
do, but once the weekend camealong, I was out at the bars and
I was never the person thatjust wanted to have one drink.
(02:35):
I remember even thinking peoplethat just had one drink I was
like why would you just have onedrink?
There's no fun in that.
And so I would always end uptipsy or, most of the time,
drunk, making decisions that Iwouldn't make when I was sober,
and I kind of played that gamefor gosh probably over 10 years.
And during that time I ofcourse started to question my
relationship with alcohol.
(02:56):
When I started to just haveconsequences for my drinking my
first DWI, I started to justrecognize that things were
happening that I wouldn'tremember so having just constant
blackouts, relationships, justkind of getting hindered from my
alcohol consumption and thingslike that, and always believed
in God but never really had arelationship with Jesus, and so
(03:18):
kind of just fast forwardingwhen my drinking just kind of
escalated.
I was in a toxic relationshipfor about 10 years and I didn't
know at that time, but hestruggled with addiction.
But as we kind of went throughour relationship his addiction
really escalated and then Irealized that I was using
alcohol to just really cope andI didn't know how to navigate
that relationship.
(03:39):
I was very new to whataddiction even looked like.
Even though I knew I was abinge drinker, I never really
saw that as an addiction, eventhough that is obviously that's
really close to addiction.
You can have that emotionaladdiction and things like that.
And so I just found myselfreally using alcohol to cope
just with his addiction reallyand just also with the toxicity,
with the trauma that went alongwith that.
(03:59):
And in the midst of that'sreally when I found Jesus.
And, like I said, I was alreadya believer.
But I remember there was thistime where I was just searching
for something.
I didn't know it was Jesus atthat time, but I was searching
for something and as I look backI really just feel like this
was a Holy Spirit just leading.
I had this idea.
I was like you know what, maybeI should join a Bible study
which was never even a thoughtat that time.
(04:22):
So I know that was the HolySpirit for sure.
And I had come across anacquaintance from high school
actually, and her and herhusband were doing what I
thought was a Bible study, butthey were actually running
church from home and so it was asmall church and so they
invited me over.
I went over there and from thatpoint on I always say God
wrecked my life in the best waypossible, because they really
(04:43):
showed me the unconditional loveof Christ.
I started reading the Bible, Istarted to build my relationship
with Christ, and this is reallywhen I started to get that
conviction to let go of thatrelationship, which I already
knew.
Once I started reading the wordof God and building that
relationship with Christ, I knewthat it wasn't in alignment at
all, and so it probably took meabout two years into really
(05:05):
building that relationship withChrist to finally make that move
, and so I ended up leaving therelationship about gosh yeah,
about after 10 years.
And then I was like, okay, it'sgoing to be so much easier to
stop drinking now, right,because he's the problem.
Right, I wasn't fully takingaccountability because I was
like, oh, yeah, like he's theproblem.
That's why I'm drinking andit's going to be fine.
And so I ended the relationshipand that's actually when I
(05:28):
started drinking even more.
And that was the first time whenI, I remember, I went out
drinking and I woke up, ofcourse, having a hangover,
feeling the anxiety, all thefeelings.
And I just remember having thisfeeling too, which I would have
this over and over again whereI was just like Crystal, like
(05:48):
you are not living up to yourpotential.
This is not what God has foryou.
And for the first time in mylife, I felt like I was losing
control and I had this thoughtwhere it was like and again I
feel like this is the HolySpirit to you where it was just
like you can continue to drinklike this, but you're not going
to fulfill the purpose that Godhas for you.
And so that was probably one ofthe scariest moments, because I
had never felt that way before,I never felt like I was losing
control.
And I also knew that if I keptdrinking like that, I would
become physically addicted toalcohol, because the days where
(06:11):
I was sober, they were less andless.
At that point, it wasn't justthe weekends, it was like
Wednesday, thursday, friday,maybe take a day off and then,
you know, keep going.
So whenever those feelings,whenever that hangover would
wear off and those feelingswould come up, that's when I
would want to go drink again.
I didn't know how to navigatemy emotions triggers, nothing
like that.
(06:31):
And so at that point is reallywhen I reached out to my church,
because they knew what wasgoing on with my relationship
and with alcohol and just kindof the journey I was on, and so
they helped me stay accountablePraise God, thank God for them.
And then I also hired a sobercoach, like myself, I know at
that time I was looking for afaith-based coach but couldn't
really find one.
But this coach really helped mejust kind of get the beginning
stages of that accountability aswell.
And then I also hired aChristian therapist and I just
(06:53):
covered all my bases because Iwas like, whatever you're doing,
crystal, it is not working.
So we need accountability, weneed support.
And so from that point on itkind of just led me to where I'm
at today and obviously justcoaching women, christian women,
and just helping them breakthat binge drinking cycle.
And even some women that cometo me they're just like maybe
they drink once a month andthey're just like man, like I,
(07:14):
have this conviction that theLord is putting on my heart and
I just can't seem to give it up.
And so that's what we focus on,and really just focus on also
just having a sober mind,because it's about so much more
than just letting go of alcohol,but really developing that mind
of Christ.
So that's it in a nutshell.
I always try to condense it,but there's so many moving
pieces there.
Speaker 1 (07:33):
I know I love this
story because I feel like I can
relate to parts of your story,yeah, so much.
Maybe that's why we bonded isbecause I'm like, oh yeah, I
could see myself in that part, Icould see how this part is
close to my life.
Yeah and yeah, getting to aplace now where it's okay.
I mean, now I'm like I'll have.
I think my husband bought me abottle of wine like three months
ago and I had one glass from itand now I just use it to cook
(07:56):
all the time.
Because I'm like I can't.
I just can't, unless I'm aroundone friend and then then she's
we're going to put, she's we'regoing to, but now she's a mom,
so maybe not, but in our early20s we did the same thing,
though it was the same thingLike we were normal sober people
, like Monday to Thursday wewould go out to Westies, which
is terrible.
It's like working in the schoolsystem and things like that.
(08:17):
And yeah, it was never one.
And so then it led to baddecisions.
I like met my first husbandwhile I was at a bar, like in
Atlantic City, and I knew that Ihad a vision from God like I
was going to meet my husband inchurch and all these things, and
so I married this man who in abar, from Atlantic City and he
(08:38):
had an opioid addiction andthat's the first time I'd ever
really experienced addiction andlike what that looks like,
which, yeah, I mean there wastimes like it made my drinking
worse.
Yeah, it made my addiction Ifeel like a little bit worse and
things like that.
And then when I split, then Iwas just by myself.
I moved to Georgia by myselffor six months and just lived
alone for six months.
(08:58):
God was like, let me just pluckyou and move you, and so then I
feel like I didn't.
I had no friends, so it waseasy for me to not binge drink
anymore Any of those things.
I did the same thing for asolid almost 10 years.
That behavior existed and thenwhen I found you I was like oh,
my gosh this is so similar and Ilove that you brought up to you
(09:20):
.
It's not necessarily that you'relike going out and drinking a
ton to you and that's why peoplecome to you.
They're coming to you becauseof other issues, right?
Or they want to give it up, orwhere.
What would you say to likethose kind of women who are like
I only have one glass of wine amonth, but God's calling me to
give it up, or like where do youfeel like the hangup is for
people and even giving up likethat one glass of wine a month?
Speaker 2 (09:39):
Yeah, I mean, I feel
like when it comes to that, it
can vary.
So some people, someone thatcomes to me, they maybe have
previously had a binge drinkingissue, but they've gotten to a
point where they can quote,unquote, moderate it, but the
Lord is still pressing on theirheart where it's he's no, like I
didn't say to moderate and Isaid totally remove it, even if
it's just for a season or ifit's just an idol, really is
(10:00):
what it comes down to, cause itcould be alcohol, it can be
exercise, it can be anythingthat can be an idol, right.
But I feel like, for thosewomen that do come to me, when
it's maybe just those couple ofglasses of wine, it's because
the Lord has already beenworking with them on binge
drinking before, but they'restill trying to hold on to that
alcohol, right To that idol.
And what I've seen to be truetoo which was obviously true for
(10:21):
me as well is just that it's ahindrance, right.
A lot of women that come to me,they are leaders or
entrepreneurs.
They have this big calling ontheir life and this, too, it's.
The Lord is going to mold us,the Lord is going to take us to
the pressing and the crushing,and it requires us to not live
like the world, and thatrequires letting go of those
idols like alcohol for some ofus.
Obviously, that's noteverybody's conviction, but you
(10:44):
know, the women that do come tome.
That's where they're at, wherethey're just like man, but I'm
not even getting drunk anymore.
Why?
Why do I have to give this upand I'm like, I don't know, I'm
not God, but clearly likethere's.
There's something that iskeeping you attached to this.
This is a hindrance, this is astrong cold, and so that's kind
of what I see.
Speaker 1 (11:03):
And those women?
Do you primarily work withpeople in the United States?
Speaker 2 (11:08):
Primarily, but I've
worked with a couple women from
Canada, things like that.
It really just depends, yeah,all over.
Speaker 1 (11:13):
Yeah, because I feel
like other cultures.
Necessarily.
I feel like alcohol is a littlebit less, I don't know, taboo
maybe.
Yeah, where, like you're havinga glass of wine at lunch and
stuff, like in Spain, right.
People are like, oh, andthey're having a glass of wine
at lunch and it's like normal.
Like in Spain, right, peopleare like, oh, and they're having
a glass of wine at lunch andit's like normal.
So I'm like I wonder if thebinge drinking rate is the same
in other places, as it is likehere in the state.
Speaker 2 (11:36):
Yeah, I feel like
it's definitely worse here.
That's just my take on it.
Speaker 1 (11:42):
It is super
interesting how, like a cultural
attitude towards drinking andeverything too, can impact, like
the strongholds and things thatwe have.
Speaker 2 (11:50):
Yeah, and I think too
, we've just been molded to numb
and not really go through thehuman experience, these
different feelings and emotionsthat we get as a human, and I
know we like to sometimes labelokay, it was the bad, it was the
good emotion.
But the truth is that God madeus the way, he made us right To
express these emotions, to feelthese emotions and just like
triggers, right, like sometimesthose are red flags that we need
(12:12):
to look at something or it's ared flag that we need to, not
even a red flag, but maybe moreso that it highlights something
that the Lord is trying to healus.
And so we're constantly numbing.
How are we going to besensitive to the Holy Spirit?
How are we actually going toheal, go to the next level with
the Lord and healing it, andfulfill the purpose that God has
for us and I think that's a bigpart of it is that it's like if
we have anxiety or we have, whydon't we feel some sort of way?
(12:34):
It's okay, go take a pill, godrink this drink, and it's hold
on for a second.
What is the root of this?
Why am I feeling this way?
Did I even go to God?
There are steps before thatthat I feel like we can go to,
opposed to always numbing.
I feel like society has justkind of conditioned us to think
that way.
Speaker 1 (12:52):
Okay, yes, and even
thinking about the type of
people that you primarily workwith it's entrepreneurs, it's
leaders yeah, I think there's anexpectation to one.
Be super social, right, whenyou're so, drinking becomes a
social thing, but then also youhave to be high productive all
the time too, and so we almostdon't create space to have this
(13:14):
human experience.
Speaker 2 (13:16):
Yeah, which I think
is interesting too, because I do
work with a lot of coaches, andit's like we can preach all day
to people.
We're just like, oh yeah, weknow what to tell others, but
then we don't actually take thatadvice and apply it to our
lives sometimes.
Yeah, I totally agree with that.
It can be challenging to makethat time when we are so
productive and, like you said,when we put this pressure on
ourselves which, again, when weput that pressure on ourselves,
(13:39):
that means we are not reallyallowing ourselves to get our
strength from the Lord we'reprobably out of alignment, right
, we're probably just morestriving opposed to abiding in
the Lord, and so that'ssomething to look at too.
I feel like I can go off on somany different tangents, but
yeah, I love that Strivinginstead of abiding.
Speaker 1 (13:55):
That means you need
to put it on like a t-shirt or
something.
Speaker 2 (13:59):
Yeah, it reminds me
from a song I forget which one
it is, but it literally singsthat it's, instead of striving,
really abiding in the Lord.
And I stuck in my head.
I love that the Lord and Istuck in my head.
Speaker 1 (14:11):
I love that.
Yes, definitely put that on at-shirt or something for your
client.
I should.
I'm going to take note of that.
Yeah, we're going to see her insix months coming out with a
whole clothing line strivinginstead of abiding.
No, but I do think I thinkthere's pressure for sure on,
especially as women too.
Right, because chances are likethey're also taking care of
their home and their family andall this.
So it's like, where's thedowntime for you to process and
(14:33):
experience life as a whole?
Do you feel like, because haveyou seen this primarily with
women who come to you, who arein like leadership roles and
there's like a certainexpectation of them?
Is it like a harder for them tocome?
Right, because is there like apride issue?
Is it like shame?
I would love to hear a littlebit about some of the emotions
(14:54):
these women are like workingthrough.
Speaker 2 (14:57):
Yeah, definitely.
I feel like the biggest onethat I've seen and it's probably
because this was me is pridefor sure and I'll go back to my
story.
I know for myself I feel likepride and shame for sure.
I know for myself, though, justbeing a leader and being just a
very independent person ingeneral, I always thought I was
just like I should be able tofigure this out on my own.
I should be able to stopdrinking on my own, like I'm not
(15:19):
living under a bridge, I'm notphysically addicted or I'm not
as bad as other people are, so Ishould be able to figure this
out.
And so that's what I do see.
And a lot of the women that docome to me, the leaders they're
just dumbfounded.
They're just like why can I notfigure this out?
I'm a strong, independent woman.
And then they start to get inthis guilt and shame cycle.
(15:40):
Then they kind of hide, but Ido feel like the pride and the
shame is definitely a big thingthat we have to break through.
By the time they get to me,they still have that pride a
little bit, but they're justlike okay, crystal, I don't want
to go to my church.
I feel judged.
They have these differentfeelings, but I've been watching
you and you have a similarstory, so can you help me out
with this?
So they're just finally get tothat point.
(16:01):
But yeah, pride and shame is sohuge and that was really big
for me too.
Speaker 1 (16:11):
Ooh, I actually
really love that you said this
too, because I think it would behard to go to your church right
, Especially if they have aleadership role at their church
or anything like that too.
Speaker 2 (16:17):
Which is the case
sometimes.
Speaker 1 (16:18):
Yeah, which I feel
could totally be the case.
There's definitely been timeswhere I've been in conversations
with somebody oh, so-and-sostepped back from leadership
because you're struggling withthis addiction or this addiction
.
And I'm like man, that kind offeels terrible.
You know what I mean.
To rip something away from themthat gives them a little bit of
purpose.
Yeah, so I could see not goingto your church too and then
(16:40):
feeling like you have no outletbecause you can't talk to people
at church, you can't do allthose things.
I know I grew up or I likeattended like a very high
control religious organizationand, like you, were actively
encouraged actually to monitoreach other's behavior.
Right, I know people in thatchurch who, like if they did
have a bottle of wine, like theywould hide it under their
(17:01):
kitchen sink before people cameover yeah, because they didn't
want a member to see it inpassing and they would actively.
It was very interesting.
They'd be like, okay, we thinkcrystal would be really good
working with the children, doesanybody not agree?
And you would raise your handas a congregation and be like I
don't agree and then they wouldgo meet with you after and be
(17:21):
like.
I saw her like have a glass ofwine and so therefore she can't
be working with children, so soI definitely think there's like
a lack of community kind of inthat way too.
So it can feel really isolatingand alone, because who are you
supposed to talk to when youcreate this beautiful safe space
for women to come and workthrough these issues where they
probably couldn't otherwise?
Speaker 2 (17:43):
Yeah, definitely, and
I think it goes back to like we
were talking about thatpressure to like as Christians
sometimes, you know, and yeah, Idefinitely, I see that a lot
and I think it's I don't know,it's such an honor to that
(18:13):
no-transcript.
Remember I was working with acoach at one time and she wasn't
a Christian and she was like,yeah, she was like I don't know
if women are really going toneed you in the Christian space,
because I don't only thinkChristians drink and I was like
I'm a Christian and I wasstruggling with binge drinking,
so it's just again.
I can go off on so manydifferent tangents there, but I
(18:35):
think it's.
I agree with you.
I think it's such a need withinthe church too, where people
need community and people needsomewhere to go to because they
can feel that judgment or theycan feel that shame and guilt,
and even if it is a welcomingchurch, like it.
Speaker 1 (18:51):
Okay, I love this.
So, on this thread then,because there's pressure and
everything, do you think thatthe church and like the
Christian community as a whole,could be like doing better?
What are some things you thinkthat they could do?
Sorry, this is asking her likea big C question.
What do you think the wholechurch could do to make this
like a safer place, you know, oris it something that you think
(19:13):
has to exist outside of thechurch, like for those reasons
we talked about?
Speaker 2 (19:18):
gosh, I think we
definitely need to have both,
and I I don't know what's comingto mind really is just showing
that unconditional love.
I mean, I feel like it reallycomes down to love.
I mean, I feel like when and itmakes me think back to the
church that I was at that timethey weren't sitting there
saying, oh crystal, youshouldn't be drinking.
Oh crystal, drinking oh Crystal?
Oh my gosh, that's how youdrink, that's how you're acting,
(19:38):
you're a Christian, right?
So there was literally nojudgment.
They loved me through it all.
Yes, they shared truth with me,but it was in a loving way.
And so I think, really go backto the Bible and go back to how
Jesus responded, how Jesusteaches us how to be, like.
One of the main things he tellsus is to love each other, right
.
And so I think if the churchjust focused on that, opposed to
(20:00):
being so focused on sin notthat we shouldn't talk about it,
but I think truly, if we can goback to that would make a world
of a difference.
And even if we just look at theworld right now, there's so
much confusion, there's so muchof an identity crisis, there's
so much going on, and it's Itruly believe it's because of
(20:23):
that lack of love that peopleare not really receiving.
Speaker 1 (20:27):
That's what I would
say with the church for sure.
Okay, I love that advice somuch, so if somebody is
listening right now, and they'relike okay, crystal, I'm
struggling with my one glass ofwine, or I'm secretly binge
drinking, or maybe I'm afull-blown addict right now.
Speaker 2 (20:42):
What advice would you
have for them?
Yeah, I would say that it'sokay to ask for help.
I would say I know there can bea lot of confusion too when
we're going through this processof, okay, should I drink,
should I not drink, especiallyin that binge drinking cycle,
because it's that gray area.
And I kind of just want to say,if you're having that confusion
, to really just go back toJesus, like what has God already
(21:03):
told?
Speaker 1 (21:03):
you.
Speaker 2 (21:03):
Because we can.
We can go and Google, we can goand ask somebody else hey, is
my drinking bad, or this andthat.
But it really comes down towhat God is really speaking to
you about and just allowingyourself to go on that
conviction, allowing yourself tojust trust the Lord and really
just taking that pressure offthat you have to do it alone.
That's probably the main advicethat I would give, especially
(21:24):
to leaders and things like that.
You don't have to do it aloneand at the end of the day,
everybody has their ownstruggles.
It's just some people.
You can see others more.
You can see some peoplestruggles more than others.
But at the end of the day, weare Christian or not, we are all
human beings and we allstruggle and the Lord called us
to carry each other's burdens.
He says to lay it at his feet,and I'll stop right there
(21:46):
because if not I'll probablykeep rambling.
But that's the one thing I willsay is that you don't have to
do it alone, you don't have tohave that shame or guilt and
it's okay to ask for help.
You're not signing your lifeaway.
It's just kind of taking thatnext step to freedom, which the
Lord is probably alreadyconvicting you on.
Speaker 1 (22:01):
Okay, I love this.
Where can they go to find you,so they don't have to do it
alone?
Speaker 2 (22:06):
Yeah, so I have a
free community it's called the
Kingdom Alliance Community onFacebook, and then I also have a
12-week mentorship that'scalled the Clean Method
Mentorship and that's where Ireally take you through a
12-week curriculum and I justshow you everything that the
Lord has really taught me, whatI've learned through my own
experience and education ofreally letting go of alcohol but
, like I said, really learninghow to develop a sober mind,
(22:28):
because it goes beyond just thebottle.
We do talk a lot about otherthings because I know for myself
, when I stopped drinkingalcohol, I started overdoing it
with caffeine and then it wasfood and I was over obsessing
over my body, and so we reallytouch on all those different
things and relationships andthings like that, and so that's
essentially what the 12 weekclean method mentorship is.
So I would say on Facebook is agreat place to find me.
Speaker 1 (22:50):
I'm also on TikTok
and yeah also on TikTok and,
yeah, I love it.
I will link to all of her stuff.
That's where I found her withTikTok, that's where we
connected many moons ago, and soI am just so grateful that
you're here.
We probably could do likemultiple episodes talking about
what it actually means to besober minded, and poor Crystal
was not prepared for me to askher like, hey, how should we fix
(23:11):
the church?
I gave her no prep for that, bythe way, but I just love and
appreciate you being here andjust sharing this with us
because, yeah, so many of ushave either been through it, we
know somebody who's gone throughit, and it's not the easiest
thing to ask for help for.
So I just appreciate you beingso vocal and willing to share
your story so that others canfind freedom.
Speaker 2 (23:32):
Yeah, definitely.
Speaker 1 (23:37):
Thank you so much for
having me.
I appreciate you.
Thank you, friend.
Hey friend, what a joy it hasbeen to share today's journey
with you.
If you found a spark ofinspiration or a nugget of
wisdom that resonated, would youbless someone else by sharing
this episode with them?
It could be the encouragementthey need to step into their
purpose and calling.
Also, if you could spare amoment to leave a review, it
would mean the world to me.
I really appreciate yourfeedback and it really helps our
(24:00):
community grow.
Remember, the road todiscovering God's call for you
isn't one you have to walk alone.
So join me again next Mondayfor another episode where we'll
continue to explore the depthsof leadership and the heights of
our heavenly calling.
Until then, keep seeking, keepgrowing and keep trusting in his
plan.