June 30, 2025 • 39 mins
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The medical establishment has a dirty secret: most doctors receive only ONE HOUR of menopause training during their entire education. This staggering knowledge gap explains why millions of women suffer needlessly through perimenopause and menopause without proper care or understanding.
When host Trina shares her personal journey through menopause that began relatively young at age 47, she reveals the physical and emotional hell she endured. From debilitating hot flashes that made her feel like she was "burning from the inside" to extreme mood swings, brain fog, and depression - these symptoms weren't just inconveniences but life-altering challenges that healthcare providers routinely dismissed.
Most shocking is how symptoms many women attribute to aging, autoimmune conditions, or mental health issues might actually stem from hormone imbalances. Vaginal atrophy (which affects urinary health too), unexplained weight gain, osteopenia, skin changes, and even cognitive difficulties can all connect back to plummeting hormone levels. Meanwhile, common ingredients like soy act as hormone disruptors, making symptoms worse while hiding in everything from supplements to medications.
The disparity between how we treat men's and women's health becomes painfully obvious. As Trina points out, "If we were to tell men that their penis was going to shrivel up, it would be a medical emergency," yet women are expected to accept vaginal atrophy as an inevitable part of aging. While medications like Viagra receive fast-track approval, many hormone treatments for women remain understudied or inaccessible.
Finding specialized care often requires deep research, significant financial investment, and persistence against a system that continues to marginalize women's experiences. But the transformation possible with proper hormone management - from improved cognitive function to better sleep, mood stability, and sexual wellness - makes the fight worthwhile.
Have you experienced unexplained symptoms your doctor dismissed? Listen now, then share with the women in your life who deserve better healthcare. Together, we can demand the medical system stop treating women's bodies as mysterious afterthoughts.
Links Mentioned in the Show:
You Are Not Broken, Dr. Kelly Casperson: 318. How (AND WHY) to Prescribe Hormones
The Drive: Women's Sexual Health, Menopause, and Hormone Replacement Therapy (Dr. Rachael Rubin)
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Transcript
Episode Transcript
Available transcripts are automatically generated. Complete accuracy is not guaranteed.
Speaker 1 (00:02):
Hey, welcome to Mind your Heart Podcast, your
favorite corner of the internetwhere we chat about all things
mental health.
I'm Emily.
Speaker 2 (00:10):
And I'm Trina.
Together, we're like yourreal-life Lorelai and Rory
Gilmore.
Each week, we'll bring you realconversations about the world
of mental health and we willpeel back layers on topics like
anxiety, depression and muchmore.
Speaker 1 (00:24):
We're here to chat with you about the tough stuff,
the everyday stuff andeverything in between.
So grab your emotional supportwater bottle I know we have ours
.
Find your comfiest chair orkeep your eyes on the road and
let's get into it.
Are you ready, mom?
Speaker 2 (00:39):
Absolutely.
Join us as we mind our heartsand hopefully make minding yours
a little easier.
Welcome back.
Welcome back, I think we wereoff a week.
What do you mean?
I feel like we were late fortwo weeks because we somehow I
(00:59):
messed it up, I think.
Speaker 1 (01:01):
Oh, okay, well, also, we hit 750 downloads that I was
gonna?
Speaker 2 (01:08):
did I send you that or did you see that?
Speaker 1 (01:10):
no, I saw I got an email.
Okay, yeah, I was like whoa,yeah, that's good, that's
exciting.
I think so too.
I feel like the most we've gotis like 50, so 750 like it feels
like a boost.
Speaker 2 (01:24):
I thought so too.
I was like, really, yeah, Ithought the same thing.
Okay, so today we have ahormone, we have a yeah, one
individual hormone yes we have ahormone.
We have an episode abouthormones because I have recently
(01:44):
been doing some massiveresearch and I am on a soapbox.
Speaker 1 (01:51):
So yeah, I would also like to preface this episode
that we are not experts in therealm of hormones or medical
advice.
Speaker 2 (01:59):
So, however, I have been called a doctor before.
Speaker 1 (02:04):
But that does not mean that you are a doctor.
No, I am not a doctor orlicensed or qualified to give
medical information or advice.
Speaker 2 (02:13):
That is true.
I've only taken anatomyphysiology one and two.
I didn't go to nursing school.
I regret it, so take thisinformation with what you will
yes, and I was only called adoctor as a sarcastic name,
because I often researchedmedical advice well and because,
(02:38):
like you, often diagnosepre-doctor visit but, I say
regardless of you not being adoctor nine times out of 10,
you're pretty spot on.
Yes, I am, and the other thingis and this is what I've learned
with most things is that youhave to advocate for yourself.
That is the huge key and thatyou have to do all the
(03:01):
background research, whetheryou're dealing with your doctor
or an attorney, or anyone elsefor that matter, because it
seems as if the legwork is notbeing done by some people.
And some people are very openso I don't mean to generalize
Like some doctors and even someattorneys are very open to you
(03:23):
know, learning and listening andwhatever, but then there are
some people that are just likewell, that's not it and that is
frustrating.
All right, so let's jump intothe hormone situation.
I went through menopause young,pretty young.
I mean, I was 47, which isright on the line of menopause,
(03:44):
like them calling that too young.
But I really think that oftenwomen don't realize, and even
doctors because I will say thisabout the medical community they
get an hour of menopausetraining in their residency.
Speaker 1 (03:59):
What yeah?
Speaker 2 (04:01):
an hour.
Speaker 1 (04:01):
That's it, like their whole entire.
Speaker 2 (04:04):
Yes, so they don't know a lot about this and I am
not just guessing this.
This is information.
I listened to several podcastswhich I'm going to share in the
show notes.
One of them is called You'reNot Broken, which was an
excellent podcast, and she is aurologist who was doing a
conference for other medicalprofessionals and um, and she
(04:28):
was sharing that with othermedical professionals and she's
like I know we only had an hourof menopause training and um, it
was crazy.
So it wasn't like she was justguessing, she was like giving
information and then it's crazy.
Speaker 1 (04:40):
But it's not surprising, because the lack of
information that goes on aroundwomen's health in healthcare in
general is disturbing.
Speaker 2 (04:52):
It really is disturbing because and I'm going
to use this example, which is avery blatant example but if we
were to tell men that theirpenis was going to shrivel up,
it would be a medical emergency.
We would have a nationalemergency on our hands, for sure
(05:12):
.
But if you tell a woman thatyour vagina is atrophying, which
is basically dry and dyinginside, nothing happens Like
you're like, well, you can usesome Vagisil.
Nothing happens Like you'relike, well, you can use some
Vagisil, you could try estrogenor vaginal estrogen, but so it
is really shocking.
(05:33):
Okay, so, anyway.
So when I was going through, Ididn't realize at the time that
when I was going throughmenopause, I realized I had all
the things.
I had massive hot flashes.
I felt like I wanted.
I didn't want anyone to touchme.
I felt like I was on fire.
All the things, I had, massivehot flashes.
I felt like I wanted.
I didn't want anyone to touchme.
I felt like I was on fire fromthe inside.
I wanted to scream, I wanted tomurder people.
I've never been so angry or sador disturbed in my life.
(05:57):
I mean I was past divorce, butI remember thinking if we hadn't
just gotten divorced, we wouldhave gotten a divorce because I
couldn't handle anything.
And I mean I don't rememberthat.
Like I don't remember when Iwas at Daughtry is when I was
teaching at it, which Ishouldn't have said out loud,
but anyway, it was teaching at aschool in my district and it
(06:20):
was.
I felt like I was in hell, likeactual hell, Not only like it
was.
I was already leading up withperimenopause.
I had very bad periods, if youremember that.
Yeah, I do remember that, yeah,and that I mean, they were so
bad that it was like I had touse two super plus at one time
and it would only last for 45minutes.
(06:41):
Yeah, I recall that was stillwhen I was in the classroom.
Yeah, and I classroom, and thatwas when I was getting divorced
.
Yeah, because that was at theother school yeah, that was at
their school and I had to take amedication that actually
reduced the amount of bleedingbecause it was just so out of
control.
I mean, I had to have extraclothes at school, I had to have
(07:02):
a procedure with my students soI could go to the bathroom.
Sometimes I'd have to callthrough the door to my student
teacher and have him go get acolleague, because it was like
out of control in the bathroomand I'm like, oh my gosh, I'm
bleeding out Like it was.
Just it was intense, so badthat when I was looking for a
(07:22):
car I went car shopping.
Do you remember?
Oh, I remember this, yes I do.
Oh my gosh.
I had my two friends with me andwe went to this car place and
the guy was insane.
He ended up taking us on a.
He did the test drive he didn'tlet me test drive, he test
drove and then he wanted to showus how fast the car would go in
(07:44):
circles.
So we were doing like donuts ina parking lot and then he was
slamming on the brakes.
I've never been so scared in mylife.
What an idiot.
It was insane.
But in the meantime I wasbleeding like crazy and I went
to go to the bathroom and I hadlike bled through my pants and I
(08:06):
was like what am I going to do?
I'm in the bathroom.
I don't know if I maybe I wastexting, but my friends were
like out there with the salesguy just chatting away and I was
in the bathroom for a very longtime.
Speaker 1 (08:21):
It was.
I will say, though, like thepeople that you were with were
two very patient people, so likeit was like the perfect people
for you to spend with.
Speaker 2 (08:31):
But they were like what's going on?
And so I had to take my pantsoff and wash them in the sink
and put them back on.
And then, finally, someone cameto check on me.
I'm like, for gosh sakes, Idon't think I had my phone, I
think that was the problem andI'm like what do I do?
And I had this shirt over thetop of, like this flesh colored
(08:51):
tank top, and I had to take thetop shirt off and wrap it around
my waist like an apron, becausethe blood was in the front too,
for some reason.
And so I had to walk throughthe dealership with a flesh
colored tank top.
I looked naked with my apronshirt and it was so bad.
Speaker 1 (09:13):
Well, and then, like you did, end up getting a car
and there was blood on the seat,on the driver's seat, you're
right at home.
Speaker 2 (09:20):
That was when my, that was when I did end up
getting that kia.
Speaker 1 (09:23):
Yeah, yeah because, one of the people called me and
was like okay, here's whatyou're gonna do.
You're gonna get some warmwater and put some salt in it
and then a little bit of likeperoxide and like put it in a
spray bottle.
And when we get home, rightaway you got to come out and
spray this stuff and like get atowel, and so like it came right
(09:46):
out yeah it literally cameright out with that.
But, um, it was like you werelike upset and I was like I'm
ready.
Speaker 2 (09:53):
Like you came home and I was like I got the spray
bottle in my rag, like I don'teven remember that I just know
that perimenopause was hell, andthat's really when it starts,
because what happens is and thisis the part that I listen to on
these podcasts the scientificpart was that your hormone level
, let's say your estrogen level,is like out of 50.
(10:15):
And then during perimenopause,it's out of 50 one day, and then
the next day it might be zero,and the next day it might be
1,000.
One day, and then the next dayit might be zero, and the next
day it might be a thousand, andthe peaks of it are so extreme
for your body that you, you like, feel like you're going crazy,
and which is a reallyfrustrating thing.
And also, I didn't realize,when I was officially like going
(10:37):
, like my period had stopped,that your hormones like like
start to totally shut off andyou are no longer.
And we need our hormones forour skin, our skin tone, our
skin elasticity, the moisture inyour skin, moisture in all of
(10:57):
your body, especially in yourvagina, and I'm going to be
really descriptive in thisepisode and you also need it for
your bone strength, you need itfor everything and you just
don't realize how crucial it is.
And at that point I was, likeyou know, divorced and not
(11:21):
having sex.
So I was like whatever, oh well, my vagina is dying.
Oh well, I was already told Iwas cold and dead inside.
So I guess I am, and you know.
So it was like you know it was.
It was a part of you knowsomething that someone had
already said about me.
So I kind of like, well, Iguess this is medical evidence,
(11:41):
that that's true, and so it'sterrible, and so I just didn't
care, I didn't think of it.
And then I got osteopenia,which is the beginning of
osteoporosis, and I was like, ohcrap, and like all these other
things happened that I thoughtwere part of my like autoimmune
(12:02):
stuff.
Speaker 1 (12:03):
Yeah, and also Can you explain what osteopenia is?
Because I have no idea.
Speaker 2 (12:09):
Okay, so osteopenia is like the breakdown of, like
your bones, and it will impactyour spine, your hips, your
knees.
Like yeah, so it's like can beworse Is that genetic?
Yeah, oh shit, like, um, yeah,so it's like can be genetic.
(12:30):
Yeah, oh shit.
It can be worse in um, certainparts of your body.
And the worst part is is if youhave osteopenia that develops
into osteoporosis, like youcan't have like a hip
replacement they won't replaceyeah, so you are like screwed.
So the ways to stop that or toactually reverse it, you can
reverse it.
That's what my hormone persontold me, which I'll get to in a
second.
(12:51):
But you want to do weightbearing, exercise.
You want to make sure you'regetting enough vitamin D, you
want to make sure you're gettingenough calcium, you want to
make sure iron.
All those things are reallyimportant and the weight bearing
is one of the most importantthings to do and I do all of
that.
I do all the things they saythat you're supposed to do.
Yeah, and so because I'm like,oh, my gosh, I'm 40, what was I
(13:14):
like?
Maybe 50, when they told me Igot osteopenia and I'm like,
well, and they were like we haveto watch it and see how fast it
progresses.
Which I was like, oh, becausethe most bone loss happens in
the very beginning, after you'venot had your period for a year,
and so they have to determine,like, how fast it's going and
(13:37):
they're like well, there arethings we can do, but they don't
do it when you're an osteopenia, which makes no sense and and
so, and you don't, you know,osteoporosis makes it more more
likely that you're going tofracture or break something.
So when you hear about peoplelike breaking a hip and dying
and you know, and in, like allthese things, this is like a
(13:59):
common thing that can happen.
But when you are things, thisis like a common thing that can
happen.
But when you are like, you canmaybe accept that when you're 70
.
But I would still wouldn'taccept that.
But when you're, you know, 47or 50, like that you just got a
long way to go.
And honestly, that is somethingthat has been really shocking to
me is that I I kind of havecome to terms with like okay, my
(14:23):
kids are, I was going to say,launched, but now my son is back
Halfway.
They can function mostlyWithout me.
I guess this is like thebeginning of the end.
That's terrible.
Well, because it feels like ifI'm going to age at this rate,
(14:43):
there's no way I can carry thisbody around for another 30 years
, like it feels impossible to me, and you know, because the
moment I turned 40, it was likearthritis.
The moment I turned 50, it'slike osteopenia, menopause,
depression, weight gain, likethe list goes on and on and on,
(15:07):
and the depression had gotten,had got worse, like just you
know, even in the last couple ofyears.
And I already know I have a lowserotonin level, so that's like
a given.
But when you're not makingestrogen and progesterone it's
(15:27):
worse, and so they up yourantidepressant and so then you
start having.
Another thing that happens ispeople don't know this, because
a lot of people don't even knowhow your vagina is made up.
But your urethra is part of yourvagina and it's part of the
muscle and tissue of your vaginaand so when that starts to
atrophy or be dry because oflack of hormone, then you start.
(15:49):
It's like the whole of yoururethra starts like getting
smaller.
So then you start gettingfrequent urinary tract
infections because you're notletting your pee go all the way
out and actually people die ofUTIs, which I did not know.
Yes, I learned that on thesepodcasts and they actually said
that they would be able to wipeout the deficit if they could
(16:10):
just give women over 65 onMedicare vaginal estrogen.
If they could just give womenvaginal estrogen, it would
eliminate all the UTIs.
It would not just vaginalestrogen, that If they could
just give women vaginal estrogenit would eliminate all the UTIs
.
It would not just vaginalestrogen that you put up there.
You also have to have like acream on the urethra, because
the up there does everythingelse for everything else, but it
(16:32):
doesn't touch the urethra.
So you have to do it on theurethra as well and it can
eliminate like frequent gettingup and going to the bathroom and
it actually makes youcompletely pee when you need to
pee, not hold up a little bitmore inside which is what causes
bacteria and infection.
So I also take cranberry pills.
(16:53):
Like I was doing all thesethings because I did start
getting UTIs and I was like, ohmy gosh.
So I started taking cranberrypills and I'm like, okay, so I'm
trying to be proactive andreally the thing that like I'm
like I'll just deal with allthese symptoms and the hot
flashes are not what they usedto be.
And when I met with the hormonelady, actually I will be honest
(17:19):
, the thing that has pushed meto the brink is the weight gain,
because in the last like sixmonths, I'm like what is
happening?
It's like I feel I'm like justpacking on weight and I'm like I
don't understand what ishappening here.
And I'm like I can't understandwhat is happening here and I'm
(17:41):
like I can't get a hold of this.
I had at one point hit a weightthat I was when I was pregnant
and I'm like this is upsettingto me because I don't feel and
also all I wanted to eat waspudding.
I just wanted sugar all thetime.
It felt like an addiction.
(18:01):
It felt like people when theyneed to have a glass of wine
every night to unwind.
That's what I felt like.
I was like if I could just getto that nightly pudding,
everything will be fine.
It was like taking Xanax.
It was like, ah, and I'm likethis is not a healthy situation.
(18:22):
But the thing is, is that togain the amount of weight that
I've gained in the short amountof time that I've gained it, I
would have to be eating puddingnonstop.
And I wasn't.
And I also work out six days aweek and I eat healthy all the
rest of the meals.
So I'm like this is not makingsense and people weren't
(18:43):
listening, and that's theproblem is that they're like, oh
, it's fine.
I'm like it's not fine, youdon't.
You know, you eat one thing andyou gain 10 pounds.
That's not supposed to happen,yeah.
And and then I found out theculprit of that and this is what
I get on my soy soapbox is soy.
And so what happened is I hadto change cranberry pills and I
(19:04):
got some that accidentally hadsoy.
And I had to change vitaminsbecause my favorite company,
goop, stopped producing them,which those have made me feel so
much better for so long that Ijust I'm like I have begged them
to please make them again.
And I found this company thatsaid that they were soy free.
(19:24):
They were more expensive thanGoop.
They're supposed to be apersonal vitamin brand.
They gave you a personal planand then they have soy.
They actually they use a highquality soy called lechon or
whatever, and they're like itshouldn't affect most people.
Well, it does, it's still soy.
Speaker 1 (19:46):
People who are also allergic to soy should know that
.
Like what company was this thatsaid this Persona, persona,
yeah, and so I'm like and seemost people don't even realize
the disruptor.
Speaker 2 (19:56):
And so I'm like and see most people don't even
realize the disruptor, thehormone disruptor that soy is.
And soy is so many foods and ifI get like a certain amount of
soy, I can have, like every oncein a while a cookie or whatever
(20:16):
, and not it's not the end ofthe world.
But if it like keeps buildingon itself, then all of a sudden
it's like I eat one thing and Igain 10 pounds on itself.
Then all of a sudden it's likeI eat one thing and I gain 10
pounds.
It is like and it's thatbloated, like holding water kind
of look that I actually gotwhen I was on birth control.
So I was like, oh my gosh, andso, and it's soy, and so soy.
And the other part is is thatsome hormones are even made with
(20:37):
soy.
And I'm like what, how are youmaking a hormone for a female
using soy, when soy is a hormonedisruptor?
It mimics estrogen, except fornot the kind of estrogen in your
body, but like what.
So it just makes me so mad.
There's so many things that makeme so frustrated with what
(20:57):
we're doing to women and how wejust don't know, you know, or or
that we just don't care andwe're just it's the cheaper
alternative, so we're going touse soy.
I had to specifically ask thepharmacy for peanut, for the
peanut oil one rather than theone with soy, and and so it's.
It's crazy, and I feel likeI've lost track of what I was
(21:20):
saying.
So, anyway.
So I did this research, Ilistened to these podcasts.
They were talking about how allthese doctors should know about
it, how your rheumatologistshould know about it, your
general practitioner, yourpsychiatrist, your gynecologist
All of these people should know,because a lot of these symptoms
joint issues, dry skin, dryeyes, dry mouth, dry all that
(21:42):
all of these things can behormone related, and so all of
these things that we think areone thing could actually be that
your hormones aren't regulated.
If you gain weight in a shortamount of time, and it's a
significant amount, can behormone related, if you all
these things, and so it's likewhich lead to other.
Speaker 1 (22:03):
Yeah, other issues.
Speaker 2 (22:04):
And so I, I, I researched and I was like, Okay,
I need, because they're like Isaid, barely any training.
So I found people that werecertified in menopause, like
their menopause certified.
So they actually have moretraining in menopause, or
menopause, yes, and or they'reanother, another type of doctor
(22:26):
that also can can qualify is asex doctor, who specializes in
sex and whatever.
Because, yeah, that's anotherthing, like, when your hormones
aren't regulated, you reallydon't care about having sex,
which is right now I'm like,well, that's fine, but do you
want to never care about havingsex?
And also, that is somethingthat, you know, I probably felt,
(22:48):
even in my marriage.
And it's like, when you don'thave any testosterone, which
women are supposed to have, thenit's your libido can be like
completely shot, and that's eventrue for men, like men's
testosterone level alsofluctuates, and when theirs is
low, the same thing can happento them.
And so you know, and we've donethings for men, like Viagra,
(23:11):
but we've done nothing for women.
And also, testosterone isn'teven FDA approved for women.
So it have it's, it's like, oh,it makes me so mad.
So, anyway, so I found, I found.
So then I was like searching, Iwent to chat GPT and I went to
the deep research of chat GPT,not just your regular free
(23:34):
version, but you're.
You know, this is the one thatpeople pay $200 a month for.
I pay 20, but you get a certainnumber of deep research, yeah,
yeah.
So I did my deep research onhormones and I was like this is
the kind of doctor that I want.
I want them to be specializedin this or this.
I want them to have maybe evenheard of these people Rachel
(23:55):
Rubin, which is a huge advocatefor hormone replacement therapy,
and she is also a neurologist,and I've heard her speak on many
podcasts.
She's excellent, so that's aperson I would recommend for
sure and I'm like, and so I'velisted all this stuff.
And then they came back withthese experts that are most of
(24:16):
them were in Tampa and they werelike these people, like these
people will do this, thesepeople.
And then one of the things theysaid about the person that I
picked, which was Dr Reyes, wasthat she also gave testosterone.
Like she wasn't opposed totestosterone, which some people
are, and I'm like, well, thatdoesn't make sense, that doesn't
seem like it's well balanced,because the three hormones that
(24:39):
women, you know progesterone,estrogen and testosterone all
need to be leveled out.
And so the first initialconsultation with her is
expensive, it's very expensiveand your insurance doesn't cover
it, and thankfully my momstepped in, which I really
(25:02):
appreciate, because that's thething Like most people can't
afford to.
I mean it's $450 for theinitial visit and then 250 every
followup, and then themedication was another like 250.
So it is a very expensive yeah,it's not feasible for like just
(25:24):
your average person and likeyour insurance, like mine it was
, like your co-pay is, you know,90 and 80, and I'm like I can't
do this I thought it wasmonthly, but it was for three
months.
So I was like, okay, next timeI'll just have them give it to
me in a month at a time, becausethen it will be but there's
also a prescription websitecalled cost plus drugs, um, by
(25:48):
mark cuban, where they're?
Speaker 1 (25:51):
you basically are like just paying for the actual
cost of the drug instead of thelike up, upsell or whatever that
they charge you from likepharmacies.
So, and that that this appliesto any prescription.
So if anyone out there is like,oh I'm, I have a prescription
(26:12):
and it's so expensive I can'tafford it, look up cost plus
drugs um, goodrx didn't work forthis, so I'm going to try cost
plus drugs.
Cost plus drugs is betterbecause GoodRx gives you a
discount, but cost plus drugs isliterally just the cost of the
original drug.
Speaker 2 (26:32):
They did have another discount card and my doctor
also gave me a discount card,but that didn't reduce it.
It was actually less with myinsurance, but they did get one
of the things down.
But I'm like I made them runeverything under a discount
because I'm like I'm not paying90.
I'm not paying my.
What it would have been was$450.
(26:54):
Yeah, so I got it down to 250,which I thought was still a lot.
But that's for three months,that's a three, that's still a
lot.
It's still a lot.
So I'm going to, now that Iknow exactly what they are, I'm
going to, you know, look intocost plus drugs.
But I was, I felt I was, I wasreally calm, but I was like
getting frustrated at thepharmacy.
The other thing is the pharmacyis like why is she prescribing
(27:16):
all of this?
And so the point is is, aftertalking, dr Reyes gave me an
hour, like we sat there for anhour and I told her about all of
my symptoms and all of mymedical history and she had
copies of my blood work that Ihad sent in advance and I need
to give her my bone density.
I keep forgetting.
And then, and I filled out thisextensive questionnaire and all
(27:40):
these different things, andshe's like we can't just start
you.
You probably have zero hormones.
She's like we can't start youat a beginning level, we need to
start you at a moderate level.
And so what she's like, nomatter what the vaginal estrogen
and the cream or whatever willlike, at least bring that back
(28:03):
to life and you won't have likeexcessive dryness, which is, you
know, kind of a game changer,because that dryness can be very
uncomfortable.
I was going to say and if you'rehaving sex and you're having
painful sex because I can't Ican't imagine having sex with
completely dry no.
(28:23):
Oh, exactly, yeah, so, um, Imean it's like yeah, so, anyway,
it is.
So that's our, that's.
I've been taking that for whathas it been only a week and that
that already feels better, andthat's something that you have
to continue doing.
Like if you stop, it's going togo right back to being dry and
(28:43):
atrophy, but now it's come backto life, woohoo, yeah.
So I'm like, yes, let's have abirthday party, so anyway.
So then the next step is I hadto have blood work and I just
had that done yesterday, so Ihave to wait for the results and
then I'll start taking a.
They give you, there's likeoptions you can do, like an
(29:06):
estrogen patch.
They don't want to do subdermallike on your skin, because
there was a study that came outin like the 2000s that scared
everyone to death about hormones, saying it was linked to breast
cancer, and that has been foundto be significantly inaccurate
or not significantly, what's theword?
(29:28):
Statistically significant?
And so it is, but they stillhave that wording on the
packaging.
They won't take the wording offthe packaging.
Speaker 1 (29:38):
People are like they still have to read this may
cause cancer yeah and you know,which is very alarming and yeah
no kidding, yeah, but also thething about that is too, is that
every freaking thing in theworld or at least, if you're in
america, everything should havethat on it may cause cancer,
because everything's producedwith heavy amounts of plastic
(30:00):
and um, a whole bunch of othershit that we and also if they
think estrogen taking oralestrogen can cause cancer.
Speaker 2 (30:08):
That would mean that soy could cause cancer.
So that's that's my question iswhy aren't you writing that on
your on all the food that are inthe grocery store, because
everything has soy in it.
So anyway, but she's like youdon't just take.
When you take estrogen byitself, especially orally, then
it can be linked to breastcancer.
(30:29):
But if you are taking itsubdermally, which means on your
skin, either through a patch orthrough a cream or through a
gel and I didn't want to do thepatch because I'm like I like to
go to hot yoga sometimes and Idon't want to I just I hate
sticky, and so I'm going to do agel on your leg and then you
(30:49):
take an oral progesterone.
But you take those together.
You're not taking progesteronewithout estrogen, you're not
taking estrogen withoutprogesterone, and then we'll see
, like, where my levels are andthen if we need to add the
testosterone, then we'll go fromthere.
So it just.
I just felt like she was likethis is what we're going to do,
and she was, and she was likenot opposed to, she didn't like
(31:13):
have a certain regimen that shehas to do for everyone.
You know what I mean.
Speaker 1 (31:17):
Like it was customized to the person.
Speaker 2 (31:20):
Yes, so I just it was like I'm excited to see, and
also now that I figured out thatthe soy was in my vitamins and
I've stopped taking that for thelast couple of weeks, weight
has gone off.
Speaker 1 (31:31):
I'm so mad about that , like when you told me that and
the fact that they're like froma legal standpoint, I'm like,
how are you allowed to put nosoy when there is a soy based
product in your product?
Like, yeah, that doesn't makesense because isn't there?
Like like there's food and drugregulations where, like, if
(31:56):
something is gluten, soy ordairy free, like but they, I
think they think because youdon't.
Speaker 2 (32:01):
Even the doctor at first was like well, the
progesterone can be made withsoy.
And she's like do you have?
Like do you get, can youbreathe?
And I was like what?
And at first I got mad aboutthat for a second.
I'm like so my severity has tobe that I can't breathe, that
I'm dying.
Yeah, yeah, I'm like.
Actually, it's like I'm talkingabout like 10 pounds gained in
(32:22):
a day.
And she's like, oh, no, no, no,she's like we got to get the
peanut one.
And so I'm like I'm not takingmy chances here with soy.
So, anyway, so weight has, likethat's gotten better, thank
goodness.
Just eliminating the soy?
Yeah, so, but it's so I'mexcited.
Speaker 1 (32:39):
I just don't understand how they can put that
on the podcast.
No, I can't either.
Speaker 2 (32:42):
I don't either.
The other thing is that thatcan happen is that you can't
sleep, like when your hormonesare messed up you can't sleep.
So then you can't sleep.
That leads to a bunch of otherissues and then the whole like
even possibly the ADD thingshe's like a lot of people are
being diagnosed with ADD as anadult.
But thing she's like a lot ofpeople are being diagnosed with
(33:04):
ADD as an adult.
But it may not be actually ADD.
It can be hormone based,because the brain fog is
unbelievable, and so it's likeyou're taking medicine to go to
sleep.
You're taking medicine to beawake, you're taking medicine to
concentrate.
So my hope is to level myhormone.
Another thing that happens isyour body tries to make estrogen
.
That's part of the reason whyyou gain weight, cause it it.
(33:27):
It like gets it from fat, likewhen you store fat.
It tries to get like badestrogen.
It's trying to do anything toget.
I mean, so it's so it's reallyinteresting the.
But I'm so it's reallyinteresting.
But she's like I just can'twait to see, like how much
better I feel.
And I'm like I can't wait forthat either, like I think it's
(33:49):
going to be exciting.
Speaker 1 (34:04):
Hope in, in aging, as opposed to like just shriveling
up and being like, oh well,this is it, yeah, that's.
It's sad that that is.
Like that would be yourexpectation.
Like there shouldn't be.
Like that shouldn't be the case.
Like there should be advocacyfor women's health from doctors
period.
Not just like that you have tosearch on the deep web to find
(34:29):
and then, like, pay hundreds andhundreds of dollars to see.
Speaker 2 (34:33):
Like that is just again, because if this were men,
this would be a totallydifferent story.
Yeah for sure.
Because it is a totallydifferent story, yeah for sure.
That's what's so frustrating.
Because it is a totallydifferent story.
Yeah, it is.
Because most of medical researchis done based on the male
anatomy, and now they've justcut more female, more research
on women's health with thisadministration.
(34:54):
So then we have that on top ofeverything else.
So it's just, oh, it makes mecrazy.
Everything else.
So it's just, oh, it makes mecrazy.
But I just, I think it's reallyimportant for women to know
their bodies and to know, like,how things work and to
understand that some symptomsare not necessarily like some
kind of disease or illness.
(35:15):
That can actually be a, youknow, sign of your hormones
being out of whack.
Speaker 1 (35:20):
Yeah, and I think it's also important to and even
when you're young.
Speaker 2 (35:24):
This doesn't have to be like perimenopause menopause.
It can be.
I mean, like I even think ofthat for you sometimes about
like having hot flashes at 25.
Like that can be hormonerelated.
Speaker 1 (35:38):
Well, I don't necessarily have hot flashes,
but you get really hot, yeah,but that's not like I don't,
that's not like as much anymore,like that's not something that
really happens anymore.
Um, but yeah, it's.
Also is we live in florida, solike I'm just sweaty?
Um, but I don't remember what Iwas gonna say.
(36:02):
You cut me off so it's all rightjust knowing your body, knowing
your um well, I think that it'simportant for women
specifically, but really anyone,to know that, like, it's okay
to question your doctors Because, like, while they are
(36:22):
quote-unquote an expert in theirfield, they are also still
human and they don't have allthe information sometimes and
ultimately, you know your bodybetter than anyone.
So, if somebody's sayingsomething that doesn't sit right
with you or you don't agreewith or doesn't feel like it's
solving the problem, then keepquestioning them, keep asking
(36:45):
them things and if that pissesthem off, go find a different
doctor.
Speaker 2 (36:48):
I agree I totally agree.
I I think that makes so muchsense and I have a friend who
I'm like.
You're not getting the rightanswer.
It's hard to do because we'retaught to like listen to the
authority, Just listen, and thenthat's it.
Speaker 1 (37:02):
Yeah, and like there's that like I don't know
what societal like pressure oflike, as women too, like we're,
like we listen to authority andlike that's what we do, but like
that's it doesn't have to belike that because, like, because
they're there to help you,their literal whole, entire job
(37:23):
is to help you, not to tell youand to fuel their ego.
So if something doesn't matchup with what's going on with you
, then you're allowed to speakup.
And again, if that makes adoctor upset or frustrated, then
that's just not a person thatyou should be seeing and it's
okay to break up with ahealthcare provider.
Speaker 2 (37:45):
Yeah.
Yeah, you deserve to haveanswers, and sometimes you do
not.
Sometimes you always have toadvocate for yourself.
Yeah, you just do.
Speaker 1 (37:57):
Yep.
Speaker 2 (37:59):
Well, thank you for letting me share mine.
Speaker 1 (38:02):
Get on your soy soapbox.
Speaker 2 (38:03):
Yes get on my soy soapbox All right.
Speaker 1 (38:10):
Well, if you have questions or if you've
experienced stuff like this,please comment on this episode.
Speaker 2 (38:19):
Please comment on this episode.
Share it with people, with yourother female friends, because
there's such a lack of knowledgearound this topic and find
those podcasts that I wastalking about.
Dr Rachel Rubin if you searchher on any podcast platform, you
will find all the podcastsshe's been.
She doesn't have a podcastherself I wish she did but she's
(38:41):
been a guest on a lot becauseshe's really trying to spread
the word and then you are notbroken.
I think it's called um I can'tthink of her name, but she's
really pushing this informationas well.
Speaker 1 (38:54):
So those are good places to start we'll put them
in the description below, so youcan find those easily.
Speaker 2 (39:04):
Yeah.
All right Till next time.
Bye.
Hey, welcome to Mind your Heart Podcast, your
favorite corner of the internetwhere we chat about all things
mental health.
I'm Emily.
Speaker 2 (00:10):
And I'm Trina.
Together, we're like yourreal-life Lorelai and Rory
Gilmore.
Each week, we'll bring you realconversations about the world
of mental health and we willpeel back layers on topics like
anxiety, depression and muchmore.
Speaker 1 (00:24):
We're here to chat with you about the tough stuff,
the everyday stuff andeverything in between.
So grab your emotional supportwater bottle I know we have ours
.
Find your comfiest chair orkeep your eyes on the road and
let's get into it.
Are you ready, mom?
Speaker 2 (00:39):
Absolutely.
Join us as we mind our heartsand hopefully make minding yours
a little easier.
Welcome back.
Welcome back, I think we wereoff a week.
What do you mean?
I feel like we were late fortwo weeks because we somehow I
(00:59):
messed it up, I think.
Speaker 1 (01:01):
Oh, okay, well, also, we hit 750 downloads that I was
gonna?
Speaker 2 (01:08):
did I send you that or did you see that?
Speaker 1 (01:10):
no, I saw I got an email.
Okay, yeah, I was like whoa,yeah, that's good, that's
exciting.
I think so too.
I feel like the most we've gotis like 50, so 750 like it feels
like a boost.
Speaker 2 (01:24):
I thought so too.
I was like, really, yeah, Ithought the same thing.
Okay, so today we have ahormone, we have a yeah, one
individual hormone yes we have ahormone.
We have an episode abouthormones because I have recently
(01:44):
been doing some massiveresearch and I am on a soapbox.
Speaker 1 (01:51):
So yeah, I would also like to preface this episode
that we are not experts in therealm of hormones or medical
advice.
Speaker 2 (01:59):
So, however, I have been called a doctor before.
Speaker 1 (02:04):
But that does not mean that you are a doctor.
No, I am not a doctor orlicensed or qualified to give
medical information or advice.
Speaker 2 (02:13):
That is true.
I've only taken anatomyphysiology one and two.
I didn't go to nursing school.
I regret it, so take thisinformation with what you will
yes, and I was only called adoctor as a sarcastic name,
because I often researchedmedical advice well and because,
(02:38):
like you, often diagnosepre-doctor visit but, I say
regardless of you not being adoctor nine times out of 10,
you're pretty spot on.
Yes, I am, and the other thingis and this is what I've learned
with most things is that youhave to advocate for yourself.
That is the huge key and thatyou have to do all the
(03:01):
background research, whetheryou're dealing with your doctor
or an attorney, or anyone elsefor that matter, because it
seems as if the legwork is notbeing done by some people.
And some people are very openso I don't mean to generalize
Like some doctors and even someattorneys are very open to you
(03:23):
know, learning and listening andwhatever, but then there are
some people that are just likewell, that's not it and that is
frustrating.
All right, so let's jump intothe hormone situation.
I went through menopause young,pretty young.
I mean, I was 47, which isright on the line of menopause,
(03:44):
like them calling that too young.
But I really think that oftenwomen don't realize, and even
doctors because I will say thisabout the medical community they
get an hour of menopausetraining in their residency.
Speaker 1 (03:59):
What yeah?
Speaker 2 (04:01):
an hour.
Speaker 1 (04:01):
That's it, like their whole entire.
Speaker 2 (04:04):
Yes, so they don't know a lot about this and I am
not just guessing this.
This is information.
I listened to several podcastswhich I'm going to share in the
show notes.
One of them is called You'reNot Broken, which was an
excellent podcast, and she is aurologist who was doing a
conference for other medicalprofessionals and um, and she
(04:28):
was sharing that with othermedical professionals and she's
like I know we only had an hourof menopause training and um, it
was crazy.
So it wasn't like she was justguessing, she was like giving
information and then it's crazy.
Speaker 1 (04:40):
But it's not surprising, because the lack of
information that goes on aroundwomen's health in healthcare in
general is disturbing.
Speaker 2 (04:52):
It really is disturbing because and I'm going
to use this example, which is avery blatant example but if we
were to tell men that theirpenis was going to shrivel up,
it would be a medical emergency.
We would have a nationalemergency on our hands, for sure
(05:12):
.
But if you tell a woman thatyour vagina is atrophying, which
is basically dry and dyinginside, nothing happens Like
you're like, well, you can usesome Vagisil.
Nothing happens Like you'relike, well, you can use some
Vagisil, you could try estrogenor vaginal estrogen, but so it
is really shocking.
(05:33):
Okay, so, anyway.
So when I was going through, Ididn't realize at the time that
when I was going throughmenopause, I realized I had all
the things.
I had massive hot flashes.
I felt like I wanted.
I didn't want anyone to touchme.
I felt like I was on fire.
All the things, I had, massivehot flashes.
I felt like I wanted.
I didn't want anyone to touchme.
I felt like I was on fire fromthe inside.
I wanted to scream, I wanted tomurder people.
I've never been so angry or sador disturbed in my life.
(05:57):
I mean I was past divorce, butI remember thinking if we hadn't
just gotten divorced, we wouldhave gotten a divorce because I
couldn't handle anything.
And I mean I don't rememberthat.
Like I don't remember when Iwas at Daughtry is when I was
teaching at it, which Ishouldn't have said out loud,
but anyway, it was teaching at aschool in my district and it
(06:20):
was.
I felt like I was in hell, likeactual hell, Not only like it
was.
I was already leading up withperimenopause.
I had very bad periods, if youremember that.
Yeah, I do remember that, yeah,and that I mean, they were so
bad that it was like I had touse two super plus at one time
and it would only last for 45minutes.
(06:41):
Yeah, I recall that was stillwhen I was in the classroom.
Yeah, and I classroom, and thatwas when I was getting divorced
.
Yeah, because that was at theother school yeah, that was at
their school and I had to take amedication that actually
reduced the amount of bleedingbecause it was just so out of
control.
I mean, I had to have extraclothes at school, I had to have
(07:02):
a procedure with my students soI could go to the bathroom.
Sometimes I'd have to callthrough the door to my student
teacher and have him go get acolleague, because it was like
out of control in the bathroomand I'm like, oh my gosh, I'm
bleeding out Like it was.
Just it was intense, so badthat when I was looking for a
(07:22):
car I went car shopping.
Do you remember?
Oh, I remember this, yes I do.
Oh my gosh.
I had my two friends with me andwe went to this car place and
the guy was insane.
He ended up taking us on a.
He did the test drive he didn'tlet me test drive, he test
drove and then he wanted to showus how fast the car would go in
(07:44):
circles.
So we were doing like donuts ina parking lot and then he was
slamming on the brakes.
I've never been so scared in mylife.
What an idiot.
It was insane.
But in the meantime I wasbleeding like crazy and I went
to go to the bathroom and I hadlike bled through my pants and I
(08:06):
was like what am I going to do?
I'm in the bathroom.
I don't know if I maybe I wastexting, but my friends were
like out there with the salesguy just chatting away and I was
in the bathroom for a very longtime.
Speaker 1 (08:21):
It was.
I will say, though, like thepeople that you were with were
two very patient people, so likeit was like the perfect people
for you to spend with.
Speaker 2 (08:31):
But they were like what's going on?
And so I had to take my pantsoff and wash them in the sink
and put them back on.
And then, finally, someone cameto check on me.
I'm like, for gosh sakes, Idon't think I had my phone, I
think that was the problem andI'm like what do I do?
And I had this shirt over thetop of, like this flesh colored
(08:51):
tank top, and I had to take thetop shirt off and wrap it around
my waist like an apron, becausethe blood was in the front too,
for some reason.
And so I had to walk throughthe dealership with a flesh
colored tank top.
I looked naked with my apronshirt and it was so bad.
Speaker 1 (09:13):
Well, and then, like you did, end up getting a car
and there was blood on the seat,on the driver's seat, you're
right at home.
Speaker 2 (09:20):
That was when my, that was when I did end up
getting that kia.
Speaker 1 (09:23):
Yeah, yeah because, one of the people called me and
was like okay, here's whatyou're gonna do.
You're gonna get some warmwater and put some salt in it
and then a little bit of likeperoxide and like put it in a
spray bottle.
And when we get home, rightaway you got to come out and
spray this stuff and like get atowel, and so like it came right
(09:46):
out yeah it literally cameright out with that.
But, um, it was like you werelike upset and I was like I'm
ready.
Speaker 2 (09:53):
Like you came home and I was like I got the spray
bottle in my rag, like I don'teven remember that I just know
that perimenopause was hell, andthat's really when it starts,
because what happens is and thisis the part that I listen to on
these podcasts the scientificpart was that your hormone level
, let's say your estrogen level,is like out of 50.
(10:15):
And then during perimenopause,it's out of 50 one day, and then
the next day it might be zero,and the next day it might be
1,000.
One day, and then the next dayit might be zero, and the next
day it might be a thousand, andthe peaks of it are so extreme
for your body that you, you like, feel like you're going crazy,
and which is a reallyfrustrating thing.
And also, I didn't realize,when I was officially like going
(10:37):
, like my period had stopped,that your hormones like like
start to totally shut off andyou are no longer.
And we need our hormones forour skin, our skin tone, our
skin elasticity, the moisture inyour skin, moisture in all of
(10:57):
your body, especially in yourvagina, and I'm going to be
really descriptive in thisepisode and you also need it for
your bone strength, you need itfor everything and you just
don't realize how crucial it is.
And at that point I was, likeyou know, divorced and not
(11:21):
having sex.
So I was like whatever, oh well, my vagina is dying.
Oh well, I was already told Iwas cold and dead inside.
So I guess I am, and you know.
So it was like you know it was.
It was a part of you knowsomething that someone had
already said about me.
So I kind of like, well, Iguess this is medical evidence,
(11:41):
that that's true, and so it'sterrible, and so I just didn't
care, I didn't think of it.
And then I got osteopenia,which is the beginning of
osteoporosis, and I was like, ohcrap, and like all these other
things happened that I thoughtwere part of my like autoimmune
(12:02):
stuff.
Speaker 1 (12:03):
Yeah, and also Can you explain what osteopenia is?
Because I have no idea.
Speaker 2 (12:09):
Okay, so osteopenia is like the breakdown of, like
your bones, and it will impactyour spine, your hips, your
knees.
Like yeah, so it's like can beworse Is that genetic?
Yeah, oh shit, like, um, yeah,so it's like can be genetic.
(12:30):
Yeah, oh shit.
It can be worse in um, certainparts of your body.
And the worst part is is if youhave osteopenia that develops
into osteoporosis, like youcan't have like a hip
replacement they won't replaceyeah, so you are like screwed.
So the ways to stop that or toactually reverse it, you can
reverse it.
That's what my hormone persontold me, which I'll get to in a
second.
(12:51):
But you want to do weightbearing, exercise.
You want to make sure you'regetting enough vitamin D, you
want to make sure you're gettingenough calcium, you want to
make sure iron.
All those things are reallyimportant and the weight bearing
is one of the most importantthings to do and I do all of
that.
I do all the things they saythat you're supposed to do.
Yeah, and so because I'm like,oh, my gosh, I'm 40, what was I
(13:14):
like?
Maybe 50, when they told me Igot osteopenia and I'm like,
well, and they were like we haveto watch it and see how fast it
progresses.
Which I was like, oh, becausethe most bone loss happens in
the very beginning, after you'venot had your period for a year,
and so they have to determine,like, how fast it's going and
(13:37):
they're like well, there arethings we can do, but they don't
do it when you're an osteopenia, which makes no sense and and
so, and you don't, you know,osteoporosis makes it more more
likely that you're going tofracture or break something.
So when you hear about peoplelike breaking a hip and dying
and you know, and in, like allthese things, this is like a
(13:59):
common thing that can happen.
But when you are things, thisis like a common thing that can
happen.
But when you are like, you canmaybe accept that when you're 70
.
But I would still wouldn'taccept that.
But when you're, you know, 47or 50, like that you just got a
long way to go.
And honestly, that is somethingthat has been really shocking to
me is that I I kind of havecome to terms with like okay, my
(14:23):
kids are, I was going to say,launched, but now my son is back
Halfway.
They can function mostlyWithout me.
I guess this is like thebeginning of the end.
That's terrible.
Well, because it feels like ifI'm going to age at this rate,
(14:43):
there's no way I can carry thisbody around for another 30 years
, like it feels impossible to me, and you know, because the
moment I turned 40, it was likearthritis.
The moment I turned 50, it'slike osteopenia, menopause,
depression, weight gain, likethe list goes on and on and on,
(15:07):
and the depression had gotten,had got worse, like just you
know, even in the last couple ofyears.
And I already know I have a lowserotonin level, so that's like
a given.
But when you're not makingestrogen and progesterone it's
(15:27):
worse, and so they up yourantidepressant and so then you
start having.
Another thing that happens ispeople don't know this, because
a lot of people don't even knowhow your vagina is made up.
But your urethra is part of yourvagina and it's part of the
muscle and tissue of your vaginaand so when that starts to
atrophy or be dry because oflack of hormone, then you start.
(15:49):
It's like the whole of yoururethra starts like getting
smaller.
So then you start gettingfrequent urinary tract
infections because you're notletting your pee go all the way
out and actually people die ofUTIs, which I did not know.
Yes, I learned that on thesepodcasts and they actually said
that they would be able to wipeout the deficit if they could
(16:10):
just give women over 65 onMedicare vaginal estrogen.
If they could just give womenvaginal estrogen, it would
eliminate all the UTIs.
It would not just vaginalestrogen, that If they could
just give women vaginal estrogenit would eliminate all the UTIs
.
It would not just vaginalestrogen that you put up there.
You also have to have like acream on the urethra, because
the up there does everythingelse for everything else, but it
(16:32):
doesn't touch the urethra.
So you have to do it on theurethra as well and it can
eliminate like frequent gettingup and going to the bathroom and
it actually makes youcompletely pee when you need to
pee, not hold up a little bitmore inside which is what causes
bacteria and infection.
So I also take cranberry pills.
(16:53):
Like I was doing all thesethings because I did start
getting UTIs and I was like, ohmy gosh.
So I started taking cranberrypills and I'm like, okay, so I'm
trying to be proactive andreally the thing that like I'm
like I'll just deal with allthese symptoms and the hot
flashes are not what they usedto be.
And when I met with the hormonelady, actually I will be honest
(17:19):
, the thing that has pushed meto the brink is the weight gain,
because in the last like sixmonths, I'm like what is
happening?
It's like I feel I'm like justpacking on weight and I'm like I
don't understand what ishappening here.
And I'm like I can't understandwhat is happening here and I'm
(17:41):
like I can't get a hold of this.
I had at one point hit a weightthat I was when I was pregnant
and I'm like this is upsettingto me because I don't feel and
also all I wanted to eat waspudding.
I just wanted sugar all thetime.
It felt like an addiction.
(18:01):
It felt like people when theyneed to have a glass of wine
every night to unwind.
That's what I felt like.
I was like if I could just getto that nightly pudding,
everything will be fine.
It was like taking Xanax.
It was like, ah, and I'm likethis is not a healthy situation.
(18:22):
But the thing is, is that togain the amount of weight that
I've gained in the short amountof time that I've gained it, I
would have to be eating puddingnonstop.
And I wasn't.
And I also work out six days aweek and I eat healthy all the
rest of the meals.
So I'm like this is not makingsense and people weren't
(18:43):
listening, and that's theproblem is that they're like, oh
, it's fine.
I'm like it's not fine, youdon't.
You know, you eat one thing andyou gain 10 pounds.
That's not supposed to happen,yeah.
And and then I found out theculprit of that and this is what
I get on my soy soapbox is soy.
And so what happened is I hadto change cranberry pills and I
(19:04):
got some that accidentally hadsoy.
And I had to change vitaminsbecause my favorite company,
goop, stopped producing them,which those have made me feel so
much better for so long that Ijust I'm like I have begged them
to please make them again.
And I found this company thatsaid that they were soy free.
(19:24):
They were more expensive thanGoop.
They're supposed to be apersonal vitamin brand.
They gave you a personal planand then they have soy.
They actually they use a highquality soy called lechon or
whatever, and they're like itshouldn't affect most people.
Well, it does, it's still soy.
Speaker 1 (19:46):
People who are also allergic to soy should know that
.
Like what company was this thatsaid this Persona, persona,
yeah, and so I'm like and seemost people don't even realize
the disruptor.
Speaker 2 (19:56):
And so I'm like and see most people don't even
realize the disruptor, thehormone disruptor that soy is.
And soy is so many foods and ifI get like a certain amount of
soy, I can have, like every oncein a while a cookie or whatever
(20:16):
, and not it's not the end ofthe world.
But if it like keeps buildingon itself, then all of a sudden
it's like I eat one thing and Igain 10 pounds on itself.
Then all of a sudden it's likeI eat one thing and I gain 10
pounds.
It is like and it's thatbloated, like holding water kind
of look that I actually gotwhen I was on birth control.
So I was like, oh my gosh, andso, and it's soy, and so soy.
And the other part is is thatsome hormones are even made with
(20:37):
soy.
And I'm like what, how are youmaking a hormone for a female
using soy, when soy is a hormonedisruptor?
It mimics estrogen, except fornot the kind of estrogen in your
body, but like what.
So it just makes me so mad.
There's so many things that makeme so frustrated with what
(20:57):
we're doing to women and how wejust don't know, you know, or or
that we just don't care andwe're just it's the cheaper
alternative, so we're going touse soy.
I had to specifically ask thepharmacy for peanut, for the
peanut oil one rather than theone with soy, and and so it's.
It's crazy, and I feel likeI've lost track of what I was
(21:20):
saying.
So, anyway.
So I did this research, Ilistened to these podcasts.
They were talking about how allthese doctors should know about
it, how your rheumatologistshould know about it, your
general practitioner, yourpsychiatrist, your gynecologist
All of these people should know,because a lot of these symptoms
joint issues, dry skin, dryeyes, dry mouth, dry all that
(21:42):
all of these things can behormone related, and so all of
these things that we think areone thing could actually be that
your hormones aren't regulated.
If you gain weight in a shortamount of time, and it's a
significant amount, can behormone related, if you all
these things, and so it's likewhich lead to other.
Speaker 1 (22:03):
Yeah, other issues.
Speaker 2 (22:04):
And so I, I, I researched and I was like, Okay,
I need, because they're like Isaid, barely any training.
So I found people that werecertified in menopause, like
their menopause certified.
So they actually have moretraining in menopause, or
menopause, yes, and or they'reanother, another type of doctor
(22:26):
that also can can qualify is asex doctor, who specializes in
sex and whatever.
Because, yeah, that's anotherthing, like, when your hormones
aren't regulated, you reallydon't care about having sex,
which is right now I'm like,well, that's fine, but do you
want to never care about havingsex?
And also, that is somethingthat, you know, I probably felt,
(22:48):
even in my marriage.
And it's like, when you don'thave any testosterone, which
women are supposed to have, thenit's your libido can be like
completely shot, and that's eventrue for men, like men's
testosterone level alsofluctuates, and when theirs is
low, the same thing can happento them.
And so you know, and we've donethings for men, like Viagra,
(23:11):
but we've done nothing for women.
And also, testosterone isn'teven FDA approved for women.
So it have it's, it's like, oh,it makes me so mad.
So, anyway, so I found, I found.
So then I was like searching, Iwent to chat GPT and I went to
the deep research of chat GPT,not just your regular free
(23:34):
version, but you're.
You know, this is the one thatpeople pay $200 a month for.
I pay 20, but you get a certainnumber of deep research, yeah,
yeah.
So I did my deep research onhormones and I was like this is
the kind of doctor that I want.
I want them to be specializedin this or this.
I want them to have maybe evenheard of these people Rachel
(23:55):
Rubin, which is a huge advocatefor hormone replacement therapy,
and she is also a neurologist,and I've heard her speak on many
podcasts.
She's excellent, so that's aperson I would recommend for
sure and I'm like, and so I'velisted all this stuff.
And then they came back withthese experts that are most of
(24:16):
them were in Tampa and they werelike these people, like these
people will do this, thesepeople.
And then one of the things theysaid about the person that I
picked, which was Dr Reyes, wasthat she also gave testosterone.
Like she wasn't opposed totestosterone, which some people
are, and I'm like, well, thatdoesn't make sense, that doesn't
seem like it's well balanced,because the three hormones that
(24:39):
women, you know progesterone,estrogen and testosterone all
need to be leveled out.
And so the first initialconsultation with her is
expensive, it's very expensiveand your insurance doesn't cover
it, and thankfully my momstepped in, which I really
(25:02):
appreciate, because that's thething Like most people can't
afford to.
I mean it's $450 for theinitial visit and then 250 every
followup, and then themedication was another like 250.
So it is a very expensive yeah,it's not feasible for like just
(25:24):
your average person and likeyour insurance, like mine it was
, like your co-pay is, you know,90 and 80, and I'm like I can't
do this I thought it wasmonthly, but it was for three
months.
So I was like, okay, next timeI'll just have them give it to
me in a month at a time, becausethen it will be but there's
also a prescription websitecalled cost plus drugs, um, by
(25:48):
mark cuban, where they're?
Speaker 1 (25:51):
you basically are like just paying for the actual
cost of the drug instead of thelike up, upsell or whatever that
they charge you from likepharmacies.
So, and that that this appliesto any prescription.
So if anyone out there is like,oh I'm, I have a prescription
(26:12):
and it's so expensive I can'tafford it, look up cost plus
drugs um, goodrx didn't work forthis, so I'm going to try cost
plus drugs.
Cost plus drugs is betterbecause GoodRx gives you a
discount, but cost plus drugs isliterally just the cost of the
original drug.
Speaker 2 (26:32):
They did have another discount card and my doctor
also gave me a discount card,but that didn't reduce it.
It was actually less with myinsurance, but they did get one
of the things down.
But I'm like I made them runeverything under a discount
because I'm like I'm not paying90.
I'm not paying my.
What it would have been was$450.
(26:54):
Yeah, so I got it down to 250,which I thought was still a lot.
But that's for three months,that's a three, that's still a
lot.
It's still a lot.
So I'm going to, now that Iknow exactly what they are, I'm
going to, you know, look intocost plus drugs.
But I was, I felt I was, I wasreally calm, but I was like
getting frustrated at thepharmacy.
The other thing is the pharmacyis like why is she prescribing
(27:16):
all of this?
And so the point is is, aftertalking, dr Reyes gave me an
hour, like we sat there for anhour and I told her about all of
my symptoms and all of mymedical history and she had
copies of my blood work that Ihad sent in advance and I need
to give her my bone density.
I keep forgetting.
And then, and I filled out thisextensive questionnaire and all
(27:40):
these different things, andshe's like we can't just start
you.
You probably have zero hormones.
She's like we can't start youat a beginning level, we need to
start you at a moderate level.
And so what she's like, nomatter what the vaginal estrogen
and the cream or whatever willlike, at least bring that back
(28:03):
to life and you won't have likeexcessive dryness, which is, you
know, kind of a game changer,because that dryness can be very
uncomfortable.
I was going to say and if you'rehaving sex and you're having
painful sex because I can't Ican't imagine having sex with
completely dry no.
(28:23):
Oh, exactly, yeah, so, um, Imean it's like yeah, so, anyway,
it is.
So that's our, that's.
I've been taking that for whathas it been only a week and that
that already feels better, andthat's something that you have
to continue doing.
Like if you stop, it's going togo right back to being dry and
(28:43):
atrophy, but now it's come backto life, woohoo, yeah.
So I'm like, yes, let's have abirthday party, so anyway.
So then the next step is I hadto have blood work and I just
had that done yesterday, so Ihave to wait for the results and
then I'll start taking a.
They give you, there's likeoptions you can do, like an
(29:06):
estrogen patch.
They don't want to do subdermallike on your skin, because
there was a study that came outin like the 2000s that scared
everyone to death about hormones, saying it was linked to breast
cancer, and that has been foundto be significantly inaccurate
or not significantly, what's theword?
(29:28):
Statistically significant?
And so it is, but they stillhave that wording on the
packaging.
They won't take the wording offthe packaging.
Speaker 1 (29:38):
People are like they still have to read this may
cause cancer yeah and you know,which is very alarming and yeah
no kidding, yeah, but also thething about that is too, is that
every freaking thing in theworld or at least, if you're in
america, everything should havethat on it may cause cancer,
because everything's producedwith heavy amounts of plastic
(30:00):
and um, a whole bunch of othershit that we and also if they
think estrogen taking oralestrogen can cause cancer.
Speaker 2 (30:08):
That would mean that soy could cause cancer.
So that's that's my question iswhy aren't you writing that on
your on all the food that are inthe grocery store, because
everything has soy in it.
So anyway, but she's like youdon't just take.
When you take estrogen byitself, especially orally, then
it can be linked to breastcancer.
(30:29):
But if you are taking itsubdermally, which means on your
skin, either through a patch orthrough a cream or through a
gel and I didn't want to do thepatch because I'm like I like to
go to hot yoga sometimes and Idon't want to I just I hate
sticky, and so I'm going to do agel on your leg and then you
(30:49):
take an oral progesterone.
But you take those together.
You're not taking progesteronewithout estrogen, you're not
taking estrogen withoutprogesterone, and then we'll see
, like, where my levels are andthen if we need to add the
testosterone, then we'll go fromthere.
So it just.
I just felt like she was likethis is what we're going to do,
and she was, and she was likenot opposed to, she didn't like
(31:13):
have a certain regimen that shehas to do for everyone.
You know what I mean.
Speaker 1 (31:17):
Like it was customized to the person.
Speaker 2 (31:20):
Yes, so I just it was like I'm excited to see, and
also now that I figured out thatthe soy was in my vitamins and
I've stopped taking that for thelast couple of weeks, weight
has gone off.
Speaker 1 (31:31):
I'm so mad about that , like when you told me that and
the fact that they're like froma legal standpoint, I'm like,
how are you allowed to put nosoy when there is a soy based
product in your product?
Like, yeah, that doesn't makesense because isn't there?
Like like there's food and drugregulations where, like, if
(31:56):
something is gluten, soy ordairy free, like but they, I
think they think because youdon't.
Speaker 2 (32:01):
Even the doctor at first was like well, the
progesterone can be made withsoy.
And she's like do you have?
Like do you get, can youbreathe?
And I was like what?
And at first I got mad aboutthat for a second.
I'm like so my severity has tobe that I can't breathe, that
I'm dying.
Yeah, yeah, I'm like.
Actually, it's like I'm talkingabout like 10 pounds gained in
(32:22):
a day.
And she's like, oh, no, no, no,she's like we got to get the
peanut one.
And so I'm like I'm not takingmy chances here with soy.
So, anyway, so weight has, likethat's gotten better, thank
goodness.
Just eliminating the soy?
Yeah, so, but it's so I'mexcited.
Speaker 1 (32:39):
I just don't understand how they can put that
on the podcast.
No, I can't either.
Speaker 2 (32:42):
I don't either.
The other thing is that thatcan happen is that you can't
sleep, like when your hormonesare messed up you can't sleep.
So then you can't sleep.
That leads to a bunch of otherissues and then the whole like
even possibly the ADD thingshe's like a lot of people are
being diagnosed with ADD as anadult.
But thing she's like a lot ofpeople are being diagnosed with
(33:04):
ADD as an adult.
But it may not be actually ADD.
It can be hormone based,because the brain fog is
unbelievable, and so it's likeyou're taking medicine to go to
sleep.
You're taking medicine to beawake, you're taking medicine to
concentrate.
So my hope is to level myhormone.
Another thing that happens isyour body tries to make estrogen
.
That's part of the reason whyyou gain weight, cause it it.
(33:27):
It like gets it from fat, likewhen you store fat.
It tries to get like badestrogen.
It's trying to do anything toget.
I mean, so it's so it's reallyinteresting the.
But I'm so it's reallyinteresting.
But she's like I just can'twait to see, like how much
better I feel.
And I'm like I can't wait forthat either, like I think it's
(33:49):
going to be exciting.
Speaker 1 (34:04):
Hope in, in aging, as opposed to like just shriveling
up and being like, oh well,this is it, yeah, that's.
It's sad that that is.
Like that would be yourexpectation.
Like there shouldn't be.
Like that shouldn't be the case.
Like there should be advocacyfor women's health from doctors
period.
Not just like that you have tosearch on the deep web to find
(34:29):
and then, like, pay hundreds andhundreds of dollars to see.
Speaker 2 (34:33):
Like that is just again, because if this were men,
this would be a totallydifferent story.
Yeah for sure.
Because it is a totallydifferent story, yeah for sure.
That's what's so frustrating.
Because it is a totallydifferent story.
Yeah, it is.
Because most of medical researchis done based on the male
anatomy, and now they've justcut more female, more research
on women's health with thisadministration.
(34:54):
So then we have that on top ofeverything else.
So it's just, oh, it makes mecrazy.
Everything else.
So it's just, oh, it makes mecrazy.
But I just, I think it's reallyimportant for women to know
their bodies and to know, like,how things work and to
understand that some symptomsare not necessarily like some
kind of disease or illness.
(35:15):
That can actually be a, youknow, sign of your hormones
being out of whack.
Speaker 1 (35:20):
Yeah, and I think it's also important to and even
when you're young.
Speaker 2 (35:24):
This doesn't have to be like perimenopause menopause.
It can be.
I mean, like I even think ofthat for you sometimes about
like having hot flashes at 25.
Like that can be hormonerelated.
Speaker 1 (35:38):
Well, I don't necessarily have hot flashes,
but you get really hot, yeah,but that's not like I don't,
that's not like as much anymore,like that's not something that
really happens anymore.
Um, but yeah, it's.
Also is we live in florida, solike I'm just sweaty?
Um, but I don't remember what Iwas gonna say.
(36:02):
You cut me off so it's all rightjust knowing your body, knowing
your um well, I think that it'simportant for women
specifically, but really anyone,to know that, like, it's okay
to question your doctors Because, like, while they are
(36:22):
quote-unquote an expert in theirfield, they are also still
human and they don't have allthe information sometimes and
ultimately, you know your bodybetter than anyone.
So, if somebody's sayingsomething that doesn't sit right
with you or you don't agreewith or doesn't feel like it's
solving the problem, then keepquestioning them, keep asking
(36:45):
them things and if that pissesthem off, go find a different
doctor.
Speaker 2 (36:48):
I agree I totally agree.
I I think that makes so muchsense and I have a friend who
I'm like.
You're not getting the rightanswer.
It's hard to do because we'retaught to like listen to the
authority, Just listen, and thenthat's it.
Speaker 1 (37:02):
Yeah, and like there's that like I don't know
what societal like pressure oflike, as women too, like we're,
like we listen to authority andlike that's what we do, but like
that's it doesn't have to belike that because, like, because
they're there to help you,their literal whole, entire job
(37:23):
is to help you, not to tell youand to fuel their ego.
So if something doesn't matchup with what's going on with you
, then you're allowed to speakup.
And again, if that makes adoctor upset or frustrated, then
that's just not a person thatyou should be seeing and it's
okay to break up with ahealthcare provider.
Speaker 2 (37:45):
Yeah.
Yeah, you deserve to haveanswers, and sometimes you do
not.
Sometimes you always have toadvocate for yourself.
Yeah, you just do.
Speaker 1 (37:57):
Yep.
Speaker 2 (37:59):
Well, thank you for letting me share mine.
Speaker 1 (38:02):
Get on your soy soapbox.
Speaker 2 (38:03):
Yes get on my soy soapbox All right.
Speaker 1 (38:10):
Well, if you have questions or if you've
experienced stuff like this,please comment on this episode.
Speaker 2 (38:19):
Please comment on this episode.
Share it with people, with yourother female friends, because
there's such a lack of knowledgearound this topic and find
those podcasts that I wastalking about.
Dr Rachel Rubin if you searchher on any podcast platform, you
will find all the podcastsshe's been.
She doesn't have a podcastherself I wish she did but she's
(38:41):
been a guest on a lot becauseshe's really trying to spread
the word and then you are notbroken.
I think it's called um I can'tthink of her name, but she's
really pushing this informationas well.
Speaker 1 (38:54):
So those are good places to start we'll put them
in the description below, so youcan find those easily.
Speaker 2 (39:04):
Yeah.
All right Till next time.
Bye.
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