February 24, 2025 • 33 mins
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Ever wonder how to perfectly balance elegance and budget when planning a wedding? Join us on Mind Your Heart as we unravel Emily's journey towards a stunning February 2026 wedding that promises an "old money minimalist with an elevated luxury vibe." With the Florida heat in mind, we're on a quest for the ideal indoor venue that echoes simplicity through white flowers and charming whitewashed brick walls. From mismatched bridesmaids' dresses in striking shades to capturing unforgettable memories with photography, we aim to make wedding planning both exciting and inspiring.
Alongside Trina's tales of bridesmaid adventures and the weight of financial expectations, we tackle the age-old debate between hiring a DJ or a band. Unique touches like disposable cameras and a retro phone for voicemail guestbook entries add a modern twist to time-honored traditions. With stories of personal regrets and cherished moments, this episode paints a vivid picture of the intricate details and special touches that transform wedding dreams into reality. Embrace the blend of aesthetics and practicalities as we venture through the wedding preparations that promise a memorable celebration without breaking the bank.
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Transcript
Episode Transcript
Available transcripts are automatically generated. Complete accuracy is not guaranteed.
Speaker 1 (00:02):
Hey, welcome to Mind your Heart Podcast, your
favorite corner of the internetwhere we chat about all things
mental health.
I'm Emily.
Speaker 2 (00:10):
And I'm Trina.
Together, we're like yourreal-life Lorelai and Rory
Gilmore.
Each week, we'll bring you realconversations about the world
of mental health and we willpeel back layers on topics like
anxiety, depression and muchmore.
Speaker 1 (00:24):
We're here to chat with you about the tough stuff,
the everyday stuff andeverything in between.
So grab your emotional supportwater bottle I know we have ours
.
Find your comfiest chair orkeep your eyes on the road and
let's get into it.
Are you ready, mom?
Speaker 2 (00:39):
Absolutely.
Join us as we mind our heartsand hopefully make minding yours
a little easier.
Speaker 1 (00:46):
Welcome back, welcome back to Mind your Heart with
Daisy Mae Yep, it's you.
Speaker 2 (00:52):
Daisy's here today, so I'm Trina.
Speaker 1 (00:54):
Debery, oh, we did not introduce ourselves in the
last episode.
I'm Emily Olmostonski.
Speaker 2 (01:00):
Yay.
So, if you missed, two weeksago we shared that we were going
to be, that the podcast wouldcome every other Monday and that
Emily's engaged Yay, emily andJake are engaged.
So that was very exciting andwe went kind of along on that
one and I ended up talking moreabout my perspective than I
(01:24):
meant to, so I do not mean toand then I got so emotional.
So today we're going to talkabout, like, your vision, your
vision boards and your, yourplans or your thinking for
wedding stuff, and it'll be alittle bit shorter, but I know
(01:46):
that I, everyone that's in yourlife, is excited to know your,
you guys, and your thinking onwedding stuff.
Speaker 1 (01:57):
Well, I don't know where you want me to start.
Like, what do you want?
Speaker 2 (02:01):
Well, we can start with your original wedding plan
when you were like four and youplanned to marry Barney and it
was going to be a five dollarbudget.
So I think that we should go tothat plan.
I think not okay, so you tellus where, um like you, you have
you've created vision boardsyeah, um, we hired a wedding
(02:23):
planner, which I'm very excitedabout.
Speaker 1 (02:28):
Her name is Lindsay and she's an angel sent from
heaven.
She's so good.
She's already like helping uswith stuff, like getting
everything moving, and we senther like our top five wedding
venues that like we want to tour, um, so she's like getting like
quotes and gonna set up sometours soon.
(02:51):
so we'll start looking at venues, because that's really the
first thing that like we need tolike nail down so that way we
can get like the date.
Um, but we're thinking that thewedding will be in febru 2026.
Um, so that way.
Well, initially I was like Iwant the weather to be like nice
, like around that time of year,cause normally in Florida
(03:13):
February is like is not hot, butit's not like freezing cold
anymore.
Um, it's just like nice weather.
And but then, like Jake and Iwere looking at venues and stuff
why did you make that face?
Speaker 2 (03:28):
Because I thought it was still cold in February.
Yeah, but it's not likefreezing.
Yeah, I mean we were in Florida, yeah.
Speaker 1 (03:35):
Yeah, I thought you were being like no, it's hot.
I'm like, no, it's not February, but I like I wanted it to, not
for people to not feel likethey're sweating, but I'm like
we're not doing anything, likewe're looking at venues indoors,
like we're looking at likehotels and stuff like that, um,
and so we're like I don't knowwhy that was like, yeah, such an
(03:57):
important factor.
But um, I also I don't know-it's hot, it's, it's miserable,
it is.
Speaker 2 (04:03):
Yeah, I got married in November and it was still hot
.
I was going to say November isnot cold enough.
Speaker 1 (04:09):
in Florida it was.
Speaker 2 (04:10):
Yeah, it was.
Is that when I got?
Yeah, it was still hot.
I remember being so hot in mywedding dress going to the
church.
Speaker 1 (04:19):
Well, it only starts getting cold in Florida in like
late December and then gettingcold in florida in like late
december, and then january iswhen it's actually cold for like
a week.
Speaker 2 (04:29):
It just depends.
It's been different, like itwas different for me growing up,
and then the weather haschanged.
It's hotter, longer, it doesn't.
The cold doesn't last very long.
I hate that so much.
Yeah, that stinks.
All right so indoors.
We know it's going to beindoors, which is always smart,
in my opinion, in Florida.
All right so, and then the dateis going to be in February.
(04:50):
Yeah, Twenty, twenty six, justnot on Valentine's Day, so
that's very exciting.
What are, what are the kinds ofvenues that you're looking at
Like?
what's the overall like idea ofit.
Speaker 1 (05:06):
OK, so like the vibe of the vibe, that's what of our
wedding.
Like the aesthetic of it.
Okay, so like the vibe of thevibe, that's what of our wedding
.
Like the aesthetic of it willbe um, kind of like an old money
, like minimalist, but likeelevated, like luxury type.
Look like that's.
That's the vibe that we're goingfor um, can you describe that a
little more, because I need amore of a visual image yeah, so
(05:26):
like um, as far as like when,when you're thinking, when I'm
thinking about the ceremony,like I'm vividly thinking about
my, our favorite venue, theyhave a picture on the knot which
is like just I'm like oh, sopretty.
Um, like they have a room thathas like brick wall but it's
(05:47):
like more of like a whitewashed,distressed kind of look.
And then, um, like the aisle,like is very like simple.
There's just like white flowers, like on either side, um, and
then just like just simplechairs, like everything else is
like, there's not like a big oldarch or anything like that.
Like it's just very, it'ssimple, but it's like elevated
(06:09):
and classy, which is like where,like the old money, feel like
comes in?
Speaker 2 (06:15):
Do you, would you think when, when you say that
like I'm envisioning, rememberwhen Ross married?
Yeah, not Rachel.
Speaker 1 (06:23):
What's her name?
Emily?
Speaker 2 (06:24):
When he married Emily that it was like yeah I mean,
obviously the church was fallingdown, but it was still, yeah,
it was pretty, so pretty, yeah,yeah kind of like that, but like
a little more simple and likenot as like hoity-toity okay
because that like ross was likewearing like a tuxedo.
Speaker 1 (06:43):
Okay, so no tux, I don't know if it'll be like a
full.
I mean it'll like he'll wearsomething like that, but like,
not like with like a Cumberbund.
Speaker 2 (06:53):
Yeah, like or a vest, I don't know.
I don't love a vest, I don'tknow.
I mean like that one, yeah umand like it he's like.
So no bow ties like yeah he'llwear like a regular tie, like it
, so like a bright, a nice suit.
Yeah, so not necessarily a tux,but a nice suit.
What about?
Speaker 1 (07:12):
okay, interesting, that's interesting I feel like
that's definitely more of athing now nowadays, um, but I
like that yeah, and like alittle bit of like a vintage-y
feel Like what I want for thecake is like to just be like a
one, one tier.
I like to be one of those likevintage, like heart cakes that's
like just white and it has likeall the things on the edge and
(07:35):
it says like just married.
Okay, they're so cute.
I think those cakes are so cute.
Speaker 2 (07:40):
That is funny.
That's, that'll be a um.
That's, that's, that's yeah.
Publix could make that yeah mycake was made at Publix actually
, yeah well, my our Lindsay waslike.
Speaker 1 (07:50):
She was like you should just get a cake from
Publix.
It's so much cheaper.
And I was like so much cheaper.
Fine with me, wedding cakes, Ilike cake from Publix are
outrageous oh yeah, um, eileenbought mine at from.
Speaker 2 (08:01):
That was a gift.
Yeah, my cake, um, but it wasactually.
It didn't look like a cake fromPublix, it was actually really
pretty.
Speaker 1 (08:07):
Yeah, well, publix is good yeah, they can make good
cakes yeah, so I think that's.
Speaker 2 (08:11):
Um, yeah, I mean, because cakes can be like
thousands of dollars, which iswhich is I would, yeah, and they
don't taste good.
They never taste good andsometimes you can also do a like
a fake whatever and have asheet cake in the back.
Speaker 1 (08:23):
People do that too, yeah no, I know, I would much
rather have like a cute littledessert bar.
Like money for that, likebecause I love sweets.
So I'm like I want there to besome kind of dessert that would
be cute.
Speaker 2 (08:36):
So, like something like that.
I went to a wedding that theyhad like a candy bar and it was
adorable.
Yeah, it was very cute.
Speaker 1 (08:42):
Oh, my friend's wedding.
They just had a popcorn bar andthat was so good.
I was like I love that.
Speaker 2 (08:49):
Okay.
Speaker 1 (08:50):
So like something like that.
And then just have the cake bereally simple, like really just
for the act of cutting it, yeah,and then, like, as far as like
the dress goes which, like Jakestop listening to this part, sir
Um, I, I really want like a, adress that can like transform,
(09:11):
like, cause I want to be able, Iwant to wear like the same
dress the whole time, but I wantit to like look different for
the reception.
Um, so like, the dress yeah, thedress that I'm, that I really
have like fallen in love withonline, is like it has like this
, really pretty like lace andlike detailed like bodice and
(09:32):
it's like a sweetheart necklinebut like has like almost like
leaves, like crocheted, like asthe straps, pretty.
Speaker 2 (09:41):
So this is different than the one?
That, no, it's the one.
Oh, okay.
Speaker 1 (09:51):
I showed you and it's like a corset, like bodice area
, and then, like the skirt islike this, just like complete,
like plain, like ball gown type,like silhouette.
Um, that's just like white andit's not like silk but it kind
of like, has that look like of,just like a classic white, but
that skirt is detachable andwhen you take the skirt off then
like underneath, like the, thesame like look of the bod, like
(10:12):
the bodice part is is like ashort mini, like skirt, so it's
like a cocktail dress.
Yeah, Um so you basically justadd like the big ball gown skirt
, like ceremony um, which, likeI think I love that idea.
Yeah, um because like I want tohave fun and like dance and
walk around and like becomfortable.
Um, because I also think likefor the reception, I'll probably
(10:36):
like I won't.
I'm not wearing heels, so I'llprobably get like custom like
Nike dunks or something likethat, because that's just like
very much like us.
So, Jake definitely wants towear like a nice, like classy
shoe for the ceremony, but I'mguessing that we'll both do
something like with shoes forthe reception.
(10:57):
What about a veil?
The veil, something simple,simple.
Speaker 2 (11:02):
Yeah.
Speaker 1 (11:02):
Long, short, not short, I don't know, because
like that wouldn't really gowith like the style of dress
that I want.
Um, so, like long, but likevery simple, like I don't want
it to really have any details,like I literally just want it to
be like basically a piece oftool yeah, well, that's
basically what mine was.
Speaker 2 (11:22):
Yeah, I mean, I it was, it was a.
I attached it to a thing that Imade.
That like was like a bun, likeit went around my hair so my
hair was up and then it wasinside that thing and the veil
attached to that.
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
Do you want a veil in front?
Yeah, I mean, are you gonna dothat whole thing where they flip
(11:42):
the veil over?
Speaker 1 (11:43):
no, no um, I want pictures with it, like we're
like both under it and stufflike that.
That's really the main reason Iwant a veil.
Yeah, um, it's just for thepictures.
Um, so yeah, and we're, wereally want the same
photographers that shot ourengagement to do our wedding, so
like we're our engagement to doour wedding, so like we're like
(12:09):
, we're talking with them.
Speaker 2 (12:09):
Um, yeah, I'm like what else?
What about um time of day likefood, like stuff, like that?
Speaker 1 (12:14):
I don't really know.
I mean like I don't really knowanything about that yeah like
and what that even like lookslike.
Like going into I do know, likefor like bridesmaids dresses,
like I will want it to be likekind of mixed matched, like I
want all of my bridesmaids tofeel comfortable and confident.
Like I don't feel picky aboutwhat they wear.
Like I'm probably just gonnagive them a couple swatches
(12:38):
because, like our colors arelike white and black and then
like a mauve pink and like asage, like eucalyptus type green
.
Um, so like I'll probably givelike a couple of swatches of
like a green and like the pinkto my bridesmaids and they can
pick out a dress like withwhatever in that color range.
(12:59):
So that's good, yeah, um, sothat way it's like very like it
incorporates both of thosecolors and um, because I like
that like look of like the mixmatch what about the groomsmen?
Speaker 2 (13:10):
will they wear a suit as well?
Speaker 1 (13:13):
yeah, yeah, no, they'll probably just wear a
black suit okay yeah and then umso maybe just have like a
colored pocket square orsomething yeah, so usually like
what about the size?
Speaker 2 (13:26):
because like size of what, like the number of people
there like the guests.
Yeah, uh, it'll be less than ahundred, yeah well, I mean
usually it's like around ahundred dollars a person yeah
you start thinking of that, sothen take that into
consideration.
Speaker 1 (13:42):
So, yeah, yeah yeah, well, I mean like we've had,
like, our guest list curated forquite some time you have like
90 people on it I think.
So I don't.
I don't know what the exactnumber is, but um, and also like
I'm like keeping in mind that,like some people won't come yeah
(14:05):
, so yeah that's which, like youdon't even think about.
You're like at first, because Iwas talking to my friend who
just got married.
She's like, like you invitepeople and like you think like
all these people are gonna come,but some of them won't be there
.
Yeah.
Speaker 2 (14:20):
Yeah.
Speaker 1 (14:21):
And I was like, oh yeah, like that's true.
Speaker 2 (14:24):
But you have to assume that if they are yeah,
for sure, yeah, yeah.
So and so some things I know.
That I know is that you likeit's no kids like a no kids
ceremony.
I know that's important.
And then, like what are the top?
Like I'm willing to spend mymoney on this?
The photographer.
The photographer, that's the.
(14:44):
Then, like what are the top?
Like I'm willing to spend mymoney on this, the photographer
the photographer.
Speaker 1 (14:46):
That's the most important thing.
Speaker 2 (14:46):
So um, so then you would even be less of a venue if
you um had to like choose.
Yeah, yeah, so the photographeris the most important.
Yeah, okay, what would be thenext thing?
What about flowers?
Speaker 1 (15:05):
uh, well, I saw like some really pretty ways to do it
like with even like fakeflowers, which I know is like
controversial but, um, and I cantell even you don't like that.
Speaker 2 (15:16):
But well, flowers was in my top five so okay, that's
why I'm yeah, I don't care yeah,I cared about flowers and um
nanny had some kind of a dealwith the florist and they were
absolutely beautiful.
Speaker 1 (15:27):
I mean I would love like yeah, really pretty flowers
.
Speaker 2 (15:31):
But I also like I it's not like, I'm like if I
don't feel judgment, I like youdon't, yeah, yeah like if I
don't get like, I'm willing todo whatever is like reasonably
priced.
Speaker 1 (15:42):
I don't really feel like very like attached to the
flowers or really to anythingother than for the photographer.
Okay, like there's not anythingwhere I'm like I need.
Speaker 2 (15:52):
Yeah, that wasn't a judgment I had no, yeah, I know
I and when I helped do a weddingfor um, a friend of mine, yeah,
we my other friend and I did ittogether and we did very simple
werangeas, which is my favorite.
We did hydrangeas in silverbuckets and it turned out so
beautiful, so it wasn't anything.
(16:13):
I mean, it was a very limitedbudget, so it was.
It wasn't anything crazy, butit turned out really pretty.
Speaker 1 (16:21):
Yeah, I'm okay with whatever saves us money.
So flowers are not the topthing.
Speaker 2 (16:26):
Okay.
So what about your bouquet?
Because that was my bouquet,was so beautiful, but it was so
heavy that I had to pass it off.
Speaker 1 (16:32):
I don't really care about that.
Speaker 2 (16:33):
Okay.
Speaker 1 (16:34):
Because I'm going to be holding it for like 20, 30
minutes and then I'll throw itto people later.
Speaker 2 (16:41):
So if that's Well, you don't have to.
Yeah, I mean, you can do alittle side bouquet that gets
thrown.
Speaker 1 (16:48):
Yeah, whatever, I don't know that I really like
you care about that, yeah.
Speaker 2 (16:52):
All right, so the photographer, that stuff is
number one.
Speaker 1 (16:58):
I feel like it's probably important to both of us
to have good entertainment likethe DJ yeah you want a DJ, not
a band.
Speaker 2 (17:06):
Yeah, not a band.
Yeah, DJ, yeah we want a DJ?
Yeah, that's an important thing.
What about?
What are we forgetting?
The venue, the food.
Speaker 1 (17:17):
Yeah, well, obviously I want the food to be good, but
I think that'll depend on thevenue.
Speaker 2 (17:21):
Yeah.
Speaker 1 (17:21):
Because we'll have to like go to the actual venue and
be like let's taste what you'vegot, because, like I think,
some of them that we like sentto Lindsay are like it's going
to be like, oh, this, you haveto get it through the hotel or
whatever.
Which is fine if it's like alltogether, that's just easier,
yeah, and like less vendors to.
Speaker 2 (17:44):
Is the food?
Is that like an important part,or?
Speaker 1 (17:45):
you're just kind of like yeah, whatever.
I mean I feel like it'simportant because I want.
I don't want people to be likethis sucks yeah, yeah but I also
like I'm not serving like asteak dinner yeah, everyone,
yeah, you know, yeah, yeah so,like I mean also to me.
I'm like wedding food is weddingfood?
Like, will you do a sit down?
Will you have a buffet?
I don't know.
(18:05):
I don't know that I really wanta buffet.
I don't love that.
Yeah, like for me, like, but Idid really like.
I keep talking about my friendwho got married.
She like it was like less thana month ago she did a buffet.
But it was like there werepeople there that like asked
like what do you want?
(18:26):
And they served it.
I like that.
I'm like I'm okay with that.
I don't love at least like forme to like have the guests to go
and like pick things out.
I just feel like that's I don'tknow.
I just don't like it.
It's just not my favorite, likeI would prefer it for somebody
(18:48):
like I want them to feel likeserved Okay, whether it be like
they're walking up with theirplate and somebody's putting it
on there or like.
And I did really when I went tosomebody's wedding a few years
ago and they like came with theplate or whatever.
That was great, but like I'mlike that's probably way more
yeah.
So I'm like I would be totallyfine if it was a buffet style,
but like there were people Iwould want people to be like
manning that yeah.
Speaker 2 (19:09):
OK.
Speaker 1 (19:12):
Because I also think that's better for cleanliness.
Yeah, but that's just somethingthat I think about yeah, I
wouldn't want like a bunch ofhands on my food.
Speaker 2 (19:25):
Yeah, what so?
What?
What is is something?
What about, like special dances?
Do you have like I know, likethings about that?
Speaker 1 (19:33):
I don't know.
That feels difficult to me, um,because like my dad won't be
invited, so that'll be, be likesomething that's like different.
Like you'll walk me down theaisle and I don't know.
I thought about, like you and Ilike doing a dance, like I
(19:56):
thought that would be cute, thatwould be cute.
So I think like something likethat Elphaba.
Galinda yeah, yeah, but like I'msureake and his mom will have
one like um and maybe like, evenlike grandparents or something
like maybe he'll like dance withgrammy and I'll dance with
steve or something.
So, um, yeah, I don't know, Iguess, like I haven't thought
(20:19):
about like all those littlethings yet, especially because I
feel so relieved that whenthose things, when I do have to
make those decisions, like yeah,yeah I'd be like tell me what
you want with this and I'll belike okay, yeah like she, like I
, don't have to think about likegoing down the list, like and
you don't, you're right and youalso don't have to.
Speaker 2 (20:37):
Like you just thought I had a facial expression about
flowers.
I, I didn't, I don't care, likeI, whatever you want is what I
want.
Um, I asked what your topthings were because it's like,
as far as prior, you don't havelike an open-ended budget, so
it's like no what is what is apriority to you?
What is it?
And like we had differentpriorities, you and I, so it was
(20:58):
um well, like my we.
You know your dad cared abouthaving an open bar for five
hours.
Speaker 1 (21:06):
Yeah, yeah, that's not a thing for you yeah, that
was a huge expense yeah, we willnot have an open bar at our
wedding.
Well, if, if we have likealcohol, it'll be like beer and
wine and it'll be a cash bar.
Because, like I just don't want, neither of us want that.
Speaker 2 (21:23):
We're not drinkers.
Speaker 1 (21:23):
so there won't be like hard liquor, I mean, unless
somebody brings a flask, butwhich is whatever which people
do, do whatever you want.
Yeah, I'm just not paying forit, yeah, so yeah, how about
dancing?
Speaker 2 (21:37):
So there will be dancing.
Oh yeah, yeah, a DJ, because Iwant to have fun, like that's
the thing, Like with a dj, likeyou want somebody who can like
get people on the dance floorfor sure.
Do you have any?
Speaker 1 (21:54):
um, do you want to do any group dancing, do you?
Speaker 2 (21:55):
no, probably not, okay yeah, yeah, I mean, I'm
just.
These are just all like I'mthinking of.
Speaker 1 (21:58):
I mean, I was a bridesmaid seven times this
episode to my wedding planneryeah so that way you should be
like oh okay, good, noted yeah,no, yeah, she'll ask you, she'll
.
Speaker 2 (22:08):
She'll have all these things I've been to.
I was a bridesmaid seven timesand I know that's insane, isn't
that insane?
Seven different dresses, yeah,and some extravagant.
One of my bridesmaid's dresseswas a Vera Wang, so like that
was, did you have to?
Speaker 1 (22:24):
pay for it.
Speaker 2 (22:24):
Yeah, yeah, did you have to pay for it.
Yeah, yeah, yeah, I mean I feellike I paid a little bit less
because my friend's mom, my goodfriend Eileen I'm going to give
her a shout out Eileen's momshe was determined that I needed
extra length and I'm like no, Idon't need extra length, I'm
tall in my waist.
I actually had many shops ofbridesmaid shops tell me that I
(22:48):
was the perfect size forbridesmaids dresses, because
that was the size.
The samples came in, yeah, andI was like, which was always too
big for everyone else but fitme, and I didn't have to have
anything ever hemmed, yeah, andso I was so.
But so she ordered extra length.
She paid for that, but then Ihad to pay to alter it and get
it chopped off.
So it was like what in theworld?
(23:10):
Yeah, so that was the one thatI'm like why is this so long?
Yeah, and then Eileen's, likemy mom, ordered extra length.
I'm like what?
So?
Yeah, I feel like they helpedme with that dress too, because
that was expensive.
Um, I had a couple of bridesthat did that.
One, my one friend, picked avery expensive raw silk dress
(23:33):
and and, and they had a verylarge budget for the wedding and
I, I was like broke.
I mean, I wasn't still.
I think I was still in collegewhen she got married.
So either that or I was justteaching, like I was broke.
And so I remember that theyhelped with the dress, which is,
(23:53):
you know, very kind andconsiderate.
Obviously they cared about mebeing in the wedding, so that
was really nice.
But, yeah, lots of bridesmaids'dresses, lots of weddings, and
every wedding was so different.
Everyone was so different and Iknow, like what was important
(24:14):
to me and what, and then some ofthe things that were important
to your dad that I wouldn't havecared about, like if it was
somebody else, yeah, I didn'tget the dress that I wanted.
Like that was a big regret.
That was a regret.
That was it's still a regret.
I'm like I'm still upset aboutthat this many years later and
I'm not married.
(24:34):
So I wanted this dress and thisgirl.
I was trying it on and thisother bride came in and she
wanted to try it on and theytook it from me and I was
actually gonna buy it, likeright then, because I bought my
own dress, yeah and um and I itwas like it was like a princess
dress, it was like tulle all theway and it had a thick band
(24:57):
like a satin band around thebottom yeah and then the top was
very plain and simple and, um,and it was like a dress for me,
yeah, and I really loved it.
The dress I ended up picking, Istill felt good and I loved the
back of it.
Speaker 1 (25:12):
It was like but it wasn't your.
Say yes to the dress.
Speaker 2 (25:14):
No, it wasn't yeah and um, I mean so don't pick the
wrong dress I will not yeah, orthe wrong person.
I did love having my long whitegloves.
Yeah, no.
Speaker 1 (25:29):
I will not have that.
Yeah, I wouldn't pick that now.
Speaker 2 (25:32):
That would be the last thing I would ever pick.
But, at the time it just feltso.
Like royal yeah royal, I don'tknow.
Funny.
So that's Okay, that's exciting.
What are we missing?
I feel like we're missingsomething.
Speaker 1 (25:50):
So food, so food.
We've talked about um flowersphotography.
Well, like some of the oops,what's something that some of
the like little details that Icare about?
Um like we want to have, likedisposable cameras, like yeah at
all the tables, um.
Well, actually I think we'regonna do like banquet style
tables, so it'll be like one,like a couple long tables, um,
but like I want to have like abunch.
Speaker 2 (26:09):
I'm confused, like at the reception yeah.
Speaker 1 (26:12):
I mean, okay, go ahead yeah, like a long table
okay yeah so like there's abunch of people on one side okay
, okay, okay, okay, yeah, okay,I get it.
Speaker 2 (26:20):
yeah, banquet style, okay, yeah, I'm sorry, I could
not get round out of my mindyeah, yeah, all right.
Speaker 1 (26:25):
Yeah, so I think, like I want, we want that and I
really, ever since I found this,like I am like I need this at
our wedding.
It's called After the Tone.
It's like basically like this,like retro looking phone and you
like people can leave like avoicemail.
And so and like you can get itlike on vinyl, like afterwards,
(26:50):
like they'll send you therecording, obviously, but um, I
think that is so cute yeah so Ireally would like to do that.
Um, that was like alwayssomething I was like, yep, I
want to do that so I'm like assoon as I know our date.
Speaker 2 (27:03):
I'm booking after the tone um, because I ship you the
phone and everything like yeah,and you can pick the color, so
um it, it and it's so muchbetter than a guest book, I mean
, which is also cool, but it's.
It's like you get to hear theirvoice.
Yeah, I think that would be.
I think that would be so coolto have that, like I would
actually want that right now.
Speaker 1 (27:23):
Yeah, I think that's really cool.
You get to hear like whateverybody would and also like
towards the end of the nightpeople are like, oh yeah,
whatever, and I mean I have thatfrom the wedding video?
Speaker 2 (27:33):
yeah, um, for sure, but um, which is also fun to see
.
Yeah, but um, but I like theafter the tone thing sounds cool
yeah, so like I definitely I'veI've always wanted to do that.
Speaker 1 (27:47):
I don't know like I care about like getting my nails
done.
Speaker 2 (27:50):
Yeah.
Speaker 1 (27:52):
Like those little things I feel like there, when
it comes to like wedding stuff,like I don't feel like super,
like uptight about anything, atleast yet, not yet.
Yeah, maybe that'll change, butI just feel like I'm'm like I
don't want it to be stress like,I want it to just be like
(28:13):
exactly like what we want it tobe.
And if it's not like and it nothave to be like some perfect
whatever like it like, howeverit's going to be, will be
perfect yeah, like that's justhow I feel.
I'm like just taking some of thepressure off of it, especially
because I'm like I'm reallyexcited about like the honeymoon
and like the stuff likebeforehand, like doing like a
(28:37):
bachelorette, like trip, likewith like my friends and stuff
like that.
Like I'm excited for that, um,and just like some of like the
lead up and and whatnot.
And oh, one thing that's superimportant to me is like doing
our own vows.
Speaker 2 (28:51):
Yeah.
Speaker 1 (28:51):
I've always been like we're writing our own vows.
I want that to be very personaland like we're having or we
haven't asked him yet, but we'regoing to ask somebody that is
like close, personal to us toofficiate.
So yeah, we, we're gonna havethat.
(29:12):
Like those.
The more personal things arewhat I care about, rather than
like the stuff for like the look, I guess if that makes sense
like I care more about how itfeels than like what other
people see, because, like andone thing Lindsay had said to me
she was like the thing aboutthe photos is like that's the
only thing from your wedding dayother than, obviously, the
(29:33):
after the tone thing that youget to keep.
Yeah, the rest of it is like amemory that you have and like an
experience which, like, isobviously important, but like
you physically get to have thesephotos forever, the experience
is something that you hold on totoo, For sure.
Yeah, and she was like that'ssuper important.
(29:54):
And she had said she was like Iwant it to feel like you would
never want to do it again,because you couldn't replicate
how perfect it was.
She was like that's my goal forall of my couples.
And I was like perfect goal forlike all of my couples and I
was like perfect, that isexactly what I want.
So, yeah, I I feel like I'm not,I'm trying not to be like high
(30:14):
strung or high stress like, andjust care about the things that
are, like the relationships withthe people, yeah that we will,
that will be there.
Like I'm just more excited tohave all those people that we
love, like in one space.
Like I think that's so cool.
Yeah, so yeah, and we'll havelike a sweetheart table.
I always wanted to do that,like, so that way it's like
(30:36):
there is a moment where we'rejust sitting, the two of us.
Yeah, yeah, because it'llbarely be like that.
Speaker 2 (30:41):
Yeah, so, yeah, yeah, I don't know if that's it, but
I think that's cool, I thinkthat's great.
Yeah, that's exciting.
Thank you for sharing.
Speaker 1 (30:51):
Yeah, Thank you for asking.
Yeah, I'm excited.
When I was talking to Lindsayabout this in the beginning I
was like the little Emily in meis like this is so crazy, Like
it's actually like reallyhappening, like this is an
actual thing.
It's actually like reallyhappening, like this is an
actual thing, that's happeningyeah so it like feels like it
(31:12):
doesn't hit me like that.
I'm like gonna be a bride,you're a bride yeah, I sent you
that picture.
Speaker 2 (31:19):
Did you get that picture, the bride picture from
when you were little?
No, you didn't.
I don't think so I sent it toyour phone.
You were dressed in the bridedress and you're sitting in
front of the ottoman.
Speaker 1 (31:34):
I don't remember, maybe I did wait.
Speaker 2 (31:39):
Let me look, all right I just remember you
dressing up as a bride and Ithought you were on the ottoman.
I thought I remembered yousitting on the ottoman, but
you're actually sitting in frontof it and I mean it's a picture
of a picture, so it's not likeit's that great.
Speaker 1 (31:58):
But it's not showing up in like our texts.
Speaker 2 (32:03):
All right, I'll have to look, maybe it didn't send.
Speaker 1 (32:09):
Yeah, no, I don't see it.
Oh wait this one.
Yes, that's so cute.
Speaker 2 (32:14):
Yeah, yeah, that's cute, Don't you look?
You look beautiful.
Speaker 1 (32:22):
Yeah, it just looks so like, I don't know, like just
sweet yeah, so pure For sure.
Yeah, so pure For sure, yeah,All right well, all right, well,
I think that's it.
I think that's it too.
Speaker 2 (32:37):
Yeah, all right, we'll see you in a couple weeks.
Speaker 1 (32:41):
Thank, you for listening.
Don't forget to like andsubscribe and all the good
things and tell us what you wantto hear about.
If you have any questions aboutwedding stuff, I would love to
answer that for sure any tipsthat you wish that you did or
you wish you didn't do.
That's valuable too so leavethem below.
(33:04):
But yeah, we'll see you in acouple weeks.
Hey, welcome to Mind your Heart Podcast, your
favorite corner of the internetwhere we chat about all things
mental health.
I'm Emily.
Speaker 2 (00:10):
And I'm Trina.
Together, we're like yourreal-life Lorelai and Rory
Gilmore.
Each week, we'll bring you realconversations about the world
of mental health and we willpeel back layers on topics like
anxiety, depression and muchmore.
Speaker 1 (00:24):
We're here to chat with you about the tough stuff,
the everyday stuff andeverything in between.
So grab your emotional supportwater bottle I know we have ours
.
Find your comfiest chair orkeep your eyes on the road and
let's get into it.
Are you ready, mom?
Speaker 2 (00:39):
Absolutely.
Join us as we mind our heartsand hopefully make minding yours
a little easier.
Speaker 1 (00:46):
Welcome back, welcome back to Mind your Heart with
Daisy Mae Yep, it's you.
Speaker 2 (00:52):
Daisy's here today, so I'm Trina.
Speaker 1 (00:54):
Debery, oh, we did not introduce ourselves in the
last episode.
I'm Emily Olmostonski.
Speaker 2 (01:00):
Yay.
So, if you missed, two weeksago we shared that we were going
to be, that the podcast wouldcome every other Monday and that
Emily's engaged Yay, emily andJake are engaged.
So that was very exciting andwe went kind of along on that
one and I ended up talking moreabout my perspective than I
(01:24):
meant to, so I do not mean toand then I got so emotional.
So today we're going to talkabout, like, your vision, your
vision boards and your, yourplans or your thinking for
wedding stuff, and it'll be alittle bit shorter, but I know
(01:46):
that I, everyone that's in yourlife, is excited to know your,
you guys, and your thinking onwedding stuff.
Speaker 1 (01:57):
Well, I don't know where you want me to start.
Like, what do you want?
Speaker 2 (02:01):
Well, we can start with your original wedding plan
when you were like four and youplanned to marry Barney and it
was going to be a five dollarbudget.
So I think that we should go tothat plan.
I think not okay, so you tellus where, um like you, you have
you've created vision boardsyeah, um, we hired a wedding
(02:23):
planner, which I'm very excitedabout.
Speaker 1 (02:28):
Her name is Lindsay and she's an angel sent from
heaven.
She's so good.
She's already like helping uswith stuff, like getting
everything moving, and we senther like our top five wedding
venues that like we want to tour, um, so she's like getting like
quotes and gonna set up sometours soon.
(02:51):
so we'll start looking at venues, because that's really the
first thing that like we need tolike nail down so that way we
can get like the date.
Um, but we're thinking that thewedding will be in febru 2026.
Um, so that way.
Well, initially I was like Iwant the weather to be like nice
, like around that time of year,cause normally in Florida
(03:13):
February is like is not hot, butit's not like freezing cold
anymore.
Um, it's just like nice weather.
And but then, like Jake and Iwere looking at venues and stuff
why did you make that face?
Speaker 2 (03:28):
Because I thought it was still cold in February.
Yeah, but it's not likefreezing.
Yeah, I mean we were in Florida, yeah.
Speaker 1 (03:35):
Yeah, I thought you were being like no, it's hot.
I'm like, no, it's not February, but I like I wanted it to, not
for people to not feel likethey're sweating, but I'm like
we're not doing anything, likewe're looking at venues indoors,
like we're looking at likehotels and stuff like that, um,
and so we're like I don't knowwhy that was like, yeah, such an
(03:57):
important factor.
But um, I also I don't know-it's hot, it's, it's miserable,
it is.
Speaker 2 (04:03):
Yeah, I got married in November and it was still hot
.
I was going to say November isnot cold enough.
Speaker 1 (04:09):
in Florida it was.
Speaker 2 (04:10):
Yeah, it was.
Is that when I got?
Yeah, it was still hot.
I remember being so hot in mywedding dress going to the
church.
Speaker 1 (04:19):
Well, it only starts getting cold in Florida in like
late December and then gettingcold in florida in like late
december, and then january iswhen it's actually cold for like
a week.
Speaker 2 (04:29):
It just depends.
It's been different, like itwas different for me growing up,
and then the weather haschanged.
It's hotter, longer, it doesn't.
The cold doesn't last very long.
I hate that so much.
Yeah, that stinks.
All right so indoors.
We know it's going to beindoors, which is always smart,
in my opinion, in Florida.
All right so, and then the dateis going to be in February.
(04:50):
Yeah, Twenty, twenty six, justnot on Valentine's Day, so
that's very exciting.
What are, what are the kinds ofvenues that you're looking at
Like?
what's the overall like idea ofit.
Speaker 1 (05:06):
OK, so like the vibe of the vibe, that's what of our
wedding.
Like the aesthetic of it.
Okay, so like the vibe of thevibe, that's what of our wedding
.
Like the aesthetic of it willbe um, kind of like an old money
, like minimalist, but likeelevated, like luxury type.
Look like that's.
That's the vibe that we're goingfor um, can you describe that a
little more, because I need amore of a visual image yeah, so
(05:26):
like um, as far as like when,when you're thinking, when I'm
thinking about the ceremony,like I'm vividly thinking about
my, our favorite venue, theyhave a picture on the knot which
is like just I'm like oh, sopretty.
Um, like they have a room thathas like brick wall but it's
(05:47):
like more of like a whitewashed,distressed kind of look.
And then, um, like the aisle,like is very like simple.
There's just like white flowers, like on either side, um, and
then just like just simplechairs, like everything else is
like, there's not like a big oldarch or anything like that.
Like it's just very, it'ssimple, but it's like elevated
(06:09):
and classy, which is like where,like the old money, feel like
comes in?
Speaker 2 (06:15):
Do you, would you think when, when you say that
like I'm envisioning, rememberwhen Ross married?
Yeah, not Rachel.
Speaker 1 (06:23):
What's her name?
Emily?
Speaker 2 (06:24):
When he married Emily that it was like yeah I mean,
obviously the church was fallingdown, but it was still, yeah,
it was pretty, so pretty, yeah,yeah kind of like that, but like
a little more simple and likenot as like hoity-toity okay
because that like ross was likewearing like a tuxedo.
Speaker 1 (06:43):
Okay, so no tux, I don't know if it'll be like a
full.
I mean it'll like he'll wearsomething like that, but like,
not like with like a Cumberbund.
Speaker 2 (06:53):
Yeah, like or a vest, I don't know.
I don't love a vest, I don'tknow.
I mean like that one, yeah umand like it he's like.
So no bow ties like yeah he'llwear like a regular tie, like it
, so like a bright, a nice suit.
Yeah, so not necessarily a tux,but a nice suit.
What about?
Speaker 1 (07:12):
okay, interesting, that's interesting I feel like
that's definitely more of athing now nowadays, um, but I
like that yeah, and like alittle bit of like a vintage-y
feel Like what I want for thecake is like to just be like a
one, one tier.
I like to be one of those likevintage, like heart cakes that's
like just white and it has likeall the things on the edge and
(07:35):
it says like just married.
Okay, they're so cute.
I think those cakes are so cute.
Speaker 2 (07:40):
That is funny.
That's, that'll be a um.
That's, that's, that's yeah.
Publix could make that yeah mycake was made at Publix actually
, yeah well, my our Lindsay waslike.
Speaker 1 (07:50):
She was like you should just get a cake from
Publix.
It's so much cheaper.
And I was like so much cheaper.
Fine with me, wedding cakes, Ilike cake from Publix are
outrageous oh yeah, um, eileenbought mine at from.
Speaker 2 (08:01):
That was a gift.
Yeah, my cake, um, but it wasactually.
It didn't look like a cake fromPublix, it was actually really
pretty.
Speaker 1 (08:07):
Yeah, well, publix is good yeah, they can make good
cakes yeah, so I think that's.
Speaker 2 (08:11):
Um, yeah, I mean, because cakes can be like
thousands of dollars, which iswhich is I would, yeah, and they
don't taste good.
They never taste good andsometimes you can also do a like
a fake whatever and have asheet cake in the back.
Speaker 1 (08:23):
People do that too, yeah no, I know, I would much
rather have like a cute littledessert bar.
Like money for that, likebecause I love sweets.
So I'm like I want there to besome kind of dessert that would
be cute.
Speaker 2 (08:36):
So, like something like that.
I went to a wedding that theyhad like a candy bar and it was
adorable.
Yeah, it was very cute.
Speaker 1 (08:42):
Oh, my friend's wedding.
They just had a popcorn bar andthat was so good.
I was like I love that.
Speaker 2 (08:49):
Okay.
Speaker 1 (08:50):
So like something like that.
And then just have the cake bereally simple, like really just
for the act of cutting it, yeah,and then, like, as far as like
the dress goes which, like Jakestop listening to this part, sir
Um, I, I really want like a, adress that can like transform,
(09:11):
like, cause I want to be able, Iwant to wear like the same
dress the whole time, but I wantit to like look different for
the reception.
Um, so like, the dress yeah, thedress that I'm, that I really
have like fallen in love withonline, is like it has like this
, really pretty like lace andlike detailed like bodice and
(09:32):
it's like a sweetheart necklinebut like has like almost like
leaves, like crocheted, like asthe straps, pretty.
Speaker 2 (09:41):
So this is different than the one?
That, no, it's the one.
Oh, okay.
Speaker 1 (09:51):
I showed you and it's like a corset, like bodice area
, and then, like the skirt islike this, just like complete,
like plain, like ball gown type,like silhouette.
Um, that's just like white andit's not like silk but it kind
of like, has that look like of,just like a classic white, but
that skirt is detachable andwhen you take the skirt off then
like underneath, like the, thesame like look of the bod, like
(10:12):
the bodice part is is like ashort mini, like skirt, so it's
like a cocktail dress.
Yeah, Um so you basically justadd like the big ball gown skirt
, like ceremony um, which, likeI think I love that idea.
Yeah, um because like I want tohave fun and like dance and
walk around and like becomfortable.
Um, because I also think likefor the reception, I'll probably
(10:36):
like I won't.
I'm not wearing heels, so I'llprobably get like custom like
Nike dunks or something likethat, because that's just like
very much like us.
So, Jake definitely wants towear like a nice, like classy
shoe for the ceremony, but I'mguessing that we'll both do
something like with shoes forthe reception.
(10:57):
What about a veil?
The veil, something simple,simple.
Speaker 2 (11:02):
Yeah.
Speaker 1 (11:02):
Long, short, not short, I don't know, because
like that wouldn't really gowith like the style of dress
that I want.
Um, so, like long, but likevery simple, like I don't want
it to really have any details,like I literally just want it to
be like basically a piece oftool yeah, well, that's
basically what mine was.
Speaker 2 (11:22):
Yeah, I mean, I it was, it was a.
I attached it to a thing that Imade.
That like was like a bun, likeit went around my hair so my
hair was up and then it wasinside that thing and the veil
attached to that.
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
Do you want a veil in front?
Yeah, I mean, are you gonna dothat whole thing where they flip
(11:42):
the veil over?
Speaker 1 (11:43):
no, no um, I want pictures with it, like we're
like both under it and stufflike that.
That's really the main reason Iwant a veil.
Yeah, um, it's just for thepictures.
Um, so yeah, and we're, wereally want the same
photographers that shot ourengagement to do our wedding, so
like we're our engagement to doour wedding, so like we're like
(12:09):
, we're talking with them.
Speaker 2 (12:09):
Um, yeah, I'm like what else?
What about um time of day likefood, like stuff, like that?
Speaker 1 (12:14):
I don't really know.
I mean like I don't really knowanything about that yeah like
and what that even like lookslike.
Like going into I do know, likefor like bridesmaids dresses,
like I will want it to be likekind of mixed matched, like I
want all of my bridesmaids tofeel comfortable and confident.
Like I don't feel picky aboutwhat they wear.
Like I'm probably just gonnagive them a couple swatches
(12:38):
because, like our colors arelike white and black and then
like a mauve pink and like asage, like eucalyptus type green
.
Um, so like I'll probably givelike a couple of swatches of
like a green and like the pinkto my bridesmaids and they can
pick out a dress like withwhatever in that color range.
(12:59):
So that's good, yeah, um, sothat way it's like very like it
incorporates both of thosecolors and um, because I like
that like look of like the mixmatch what about the groomsmen?
Speaker 2 (13:10):
will they wear a suit as well?
Speaker 1 (13:13):
yeah, yeah, no, they'll probably just wear a
black suit okay yeah and then umso maybe just have like a
colored pocket square orsomething yeah, so usually like
what about the size?
Speaker 2 (13:26):
because like size of what, like the number of people
there like the guests.
Yeah, uh, it'll be less than ahundred, yeah well, I mean
usually it's like around ahundred dollars a person yeah
you start thinking of that, sothen take that into
consideration.
Speaker 1 (13:42):
So, yeah, yeah yeah, well, I mean like we've had,
like, our guest list curated forquite some time you have like
90 people on it I think.
So I don't.
I don't know what the exactnumber is, but um, and also like
I'm like keeping in mind that,like some people won't come yeah
(14:05):
, so yeah that's which, like youdon't even think about.
You're like at first, because Iwas talking to my friend who
just got married.
She's like, like you invitepeople and like you think like
all these people are gonna come,but some of them won't be there
.
Yeah.
Speaker 2 (14:20):
Yeah.
Speaker 1 (14:21):
And I was like, oh yeah, like that's true.
Speaker 2 (14:24):
But you have to assume that if they are yeah,
for sure, yeah, yeah.
So and so some things I know.
That I know is that you likeit's no kids like a no kids
ceremony.
I know that's important.
And then, like what are the top?
Like I'm willing to spend mymoney on this?
The photographer.
The photographer, that's the.
(14:44):
Then, like what are the top?
Like I'm willing to spend mymoney on this, the photographer
the photographer.
Speaker 1 (14:46):
That's the most important thing.
Speaker 2 (14:46):
So um, so then you would even be less of a venue if
you um had to like choose.
Yeah, yeah, so the photographeris the most important.
Yeah, okay, what would be thenext thing?
What about flowers?
Speaker 1 (15:05):
uh, well, I saw like some really pretty ways to do it
like with even like fakeflowers, which I know is like
controversial but, um, and I cantell even you don't like that.
Speaker 2 (15:16):
But well, flowers was in my top five so okay, that's
why I'm yeah, I don't care yeah,I cared about flowers and um
nanny had some kind of a dealwith the florist and they were
absolutely beautiful.
Speaker 1 (15:27):
I mean I would love like yeah, really pretty flowers
.
Speaker 2 (15:31):
But I also like I it's not like, I'm like if I
don't feel judgment, I like youdon't, yeah, yeah like if I
don't get like, I'm willing todo whatever is like reasonably
priced.
Speaker 1 (15:42):
I don't really feel like very like attached to the
flowers or really to anythingother than for the photographer.
Okay, like there's not anythingwhere I'm like I need.
Speaker 2 (15:52):
Yeah, that wasn't a judgment I had no, yeah, I know
I and when I helped do a weddingfor um, a friend of mine, yeah,
we my other friend and I did ittogether and we did very simple
werangeas, which is my favorite.
We did hydrangeas in silverbuckets and it turned out so
beautiful, so it wasn't anything.
(16:13):
I mean, it was a very limitedbudget, so it was.
It wasn't anything crazy, butit turned out really pretty.
Speaker 1 (16:21):
Yeah, I'm okay with whatever saves us money.
So flowers are not the topthing.
Speaker 2 (16:26):
Okay.
So what about your bouquet?
Because that was my bouquet,was so beautiful, but it was so
heavy that I had to pass it off.
Speaker 1 (16:32):
I don't really care about that.
Speaker 2 (16:33):
Okay.
Speaker 1 (16:34):
Because I'm going to be holding it for like 20, 30
minutes and then I'll throw itto people later.
Speaker 2 (16:41):
So if that's Well, you don't have to.
Yeah, I mean, you can do alittle side bouquet that gets
thrown.
Speaker 1 (16:48):
Yeah, whatever, I don't know that I really like
you care about that, yeah.
Speaker 2 (16:52):
All right, so the photographer, that stuff is
number one.
Speaker 1 (16:58):
I feel like it's probably important to both of us
to have good entertainment likethe DJ yeah you want a DJ, not
a band.
Speaker 2 (17:06):
Yeah, not a band.
Yeah, DJ, yeah we want a DJ?
Yeah, that's an important thing.
What about?
What are we forgetting?
The venue, the food.
Speaker 1 (17:17):
Yeah, well, obviously I want the food to be good, but
I think that'll depend on thevenue.
Speaker 2 (17:21):
Yeah.
Speaker 1 (17:21):
Because we'll have to like go to the actual venue and
be like let's taste what you'vegot, because, like I think,
some of them that we like sentto Lindsay are like it's going
to be like, oh, this, you haveto get it through the hotel or
whatever.
Which is fine if it's like alltogether, that's just easier,
yeah, and like less vendors to.
Speaker 2 (17:44):
Is the food?
Is that like an important part,or?
Speaker 1 (17:45):
you're just kind of like yeah, whatever.
I mean I feel like it'simportant because I want.
I don't want people to be likethis sucks yeah, yeah but I also
like I'm not serving like asteak dinner yeah, everyone,
yeah, you know, yeah, yeah so,like I mean also to me.
I'm like wedding food is weddingfood?
Like, will you do a sit down?
Will you have a buffet?
I don't know.
(18:05):
I don't know that I really wanta buffet.
I don't love that.
Yeah, like for me, like, but Idid really like.
I keep talking about my friendwho got married.
She like it was like less thana month ago she did a buffet.
But it was like there werepeople there that like asked
like what do you want?
(18:26):
And they served it.
I like that.
I'm like I'm okay with that.
I don't love at least like forme to like have the guests to go
and like pick things out.
I just feel like that's I don'tknow.
I just don't like it.
It's just not my favorite, likeI would prefer it for somebody
(18:48):
like I want them to feel likeserved Okay, whether it be like
they're walking up with theirplate and somebody's putting it
on there or like.
And I did really when I went tosomebody's wedding a few years
ago and they like came with theplate or whatever.
That was great, but like I'mlike that's probably way more
yeah.
So I'm like I would be totallyfine if it was a buffet style,
but like there were people Iwould want people to be like
manning that yeah.
Speaker 2 (19:09):
OK.
Speaker 1 (19:12):
Because I also think that's better for cleanliness.
Yeah, but that's just somethingthat I think about yeah, I
wouldn't want like a bunch ofhands on my food.
Speaker 2 (19:25):
Yeah, what so?
What?
What is is something?
What about, like special dances?
Do you have like I know, likethings about that?
Speaker 1 (19:33):
I don't know.
That feels difficult to me, um,because like my dad won't be
invited, so that'll be, be likesomething that's like different.
Like you'll walk me down theaisle and I don't know.
I thought about, like you and Ilike doing a dance, like I
(19:56):
thought that would be cute, thatwould be cute.
So I think like something likethat Elphaba.
Galinda yeah, yeah, but like I'msureake and his mom will have
one like um and maybe like, evenlike grandparents or something
like maybe he'll like dance withgrammy and I'll dance with
steve or something.
So, um, yeah, I don't know, Iguess, like I haven't thought
(20:19):
about like all those littlethings yet, especially because I
feel so relieved that whenthose things, when I do have to
make those decisions, like yeah,yeah I'd be like tell me what
you want with this and I'll belike okay, yeah like she, like I
, don't have to think about likegoing down the list, like and
you don't, you're right and youalso don't have to.
Speaker 2 (20:37):
Like you just thought I had a facial expression about
flowers.
I, I didn't, I don't care, likeI, whatever you want is what I
want.
Um, I asked what your topthings were because it's like,
as far as prior, you don't havelike an open-ended budget, so
it's like no what is what is apriority to you?
What is it?
And like we had differentpriorities, you and I, so it was
(20:58):
um well, like my we.
You know your dad cared abouthaving an open bar for five
hours.
Speaker 1 (21:06):
Yeah, yeah, that's not a thing for you yeah, that
was a huge expense yeah, we willnot have an open bar at our
wedding.
Well, if, if we have likealcohol, it'll be like beer and
wine and it'll be a cash bar.
Because, like I just don't want, neither of us want that.
Speaker 2 (21:23):
We're not drinkers.
Speaker 1 (21:23):
so there won't be like hard liquor, I mean, unless
somebody brings a flask, butwhich is whatever which people
do, do whatever you want.
Yeah, I'm just not paying forit, yeah, so yeah, how about
dancing?
Speaker 2 (21:37):
So there will be dancing.
Oh yeah, yeah, a DJ, because Iwant to have fun, like that's
the thing, Like with a dj, likeyou want somebody who can like
get people on the dance floorfor sure.
Do you have any?
Speaker 1 (21:54):
um, do you want to do any group dancing, do you?
Speaker 2 (21:55):
no, probably not, okay yeah, yeah, I mean, I'm
just.
These are just all like I'mthinking of.
Speaker 1 (21:58):
I mean, I was a bridesmaid seven times this
episode to my wedding planneryeah so that way you should be
like oh okay, good, noted yeah,no, yeah, she'll ask you, she'll
.
Speaker 2 (22:08):
She'll have all these things I've been to.
I was a bridesmaid seven timesand I know that's insane, isn't
that insane?
Seven different dresses, yeah,and some extravagant.
One of my bridesmaid's dresseswas a Vera Wang, so like that
was, did you have to?
Speaker 1 (22:24):
pay for it.
Speaker 2 (22:24):
Yeah, yeah, did you have to pay for it.
Yeah, yeah, yeah, I mean I feellike I paid a little bit less
because my friend's mom, my goodfriend Eileen I'm going to give
her a shout out Eileen's momshe was determined that I needed
extra length and I'm like no, Idon't need extra length, I'm
tall in my waist.
I actually had many shops ofbridesmaid shops tell me that I
(22:48):
was the perfect size forbridesmaids dresses, because
that was the size.
The samples came in, yeah, andI was like, which was always too
big for everyone else but fitme, and I didn't have to have
anything ever hemmed, yeah, andso I was so.
But so she ordered extra length.
She paid for that, but then Ihad to pay to alter it and get
it chopped off.
So it was like what in theworld?
(23:10):
Yeah, so that was the one thatI'm like why is this so long?
Yeah, and then Eileen's, likemy mom, ordered extra length.
I'm like what?
So?
Yeah, I feel like they helpedme with that dress too, because
that was expensive.
Um, I had a couple of bridesthat did that.
One, my one friend, picked avery expensive raw silk dress
(23:33):
and and, and they had a verylarge budget for the wedding and
I, I was like broke.
I mean, I wasn't still.
I think I was still in collegewhen she got married.
So either that or I was justteaching, like I was broke.
And so I remember that theyhelped with the dress, which is,
(23:53):
you know, very kind andconsiderate.
Obviously they cared about mebeing in the wedding, so that
was really nice.
But, yeah, lots of bridesmaids'dresses, lots of weddings, and
every wedding was so different.
Everyone was so different and Iknow, like what was important
(24:14):
to me and what, and then some ofthe things that were important
to your dad that I wouldn't havecared about, like if it was
somebody else, yeah, I didn'tget the dress that I wanted.
Like that was a big regret.
That was a regret.
That was it's still a regret.
I'm like I'm still upset aboutthat this many years later and
I'm not married.
(24:34):
So I wanted this dress and thisgirl.
I was trying it on and thisother bride came in and she
wanted to try it on and theytook it from me and I was
actually gonna buy it, likeright then, because I bought my
own dress, yeah and um and I itwas like it was like a princess
dress, it was like tulle all theway and it had a thick band
(24:57):
like a satin band around thebottom yeah and then the top was
very plain and simple and, um,and it was like a dress for me,
yeah, and I really loved it.
The dress I ended up picking, Istill felt good and I loved the
back of it.
Speaker 1 (25:12):
It was like but it wasn't your.
Say yes to the dress.
Speaker 2 (25:14):
No, it wasn't yeah and um, I mean so don't pick the
wrong dress I will not yeah, orthe wrong person.
I did love having my long whitegloves.
Yeah, no.
Speaker 1 (25:29):
I will not have that.
Yeah, I wouldn't pick that now.
Speaker 2 (25:32):
That would be the last thing I would ever pick.
But, at the time it just feltso.
Like royal yeah royal, I don'tknow.
Funny.
So that's Okay, that's exciting.
What are we missing?
I feel like we're missingsomething.
Speaker 1 (25:50):
So food, so food.
We've talked about um flowersphotography.
Well, like some of the oops,what's something that some of
the like little details that Icare about?
Um like we want to have, likedisposable cameras, like yeah at
all the tables, um.
Well, actually I think we'regonna do like banquet style
tables, so it'll be like one,like a couple long tables, um,
but like I want to have like abunch.
Speaker 2 (26:09):
I'm confused, like at the reception yeah.
Speaker 1 (26:12):
I mean, okay, go ahead yeah, like a long table
okay yeah so like there's abunch of people on one side okay
, okay, okay, okay, yeah, okay,I get it.
Speaker 2 (26:20):
yeah, banquet style, okay, yeah, I'm sorry, I could
not get round out of my mindyeah, yeah, all right.
Speaker 1 (26:25):
Yeah, so I think, like I want, we want that and I
really, ever since I found this,like I am like I need this at
our wedding.
It's called After the Tone.
It's like basically like this,like retro looking phone and you
like people can leave like avoicemail.
And so and like you can get itlike on vinyl, like afterwards,
(26:50):
like they'll send you therecording, obviously, but um, I
think that is so cute yeah so Ireally would like to do that.
Um, that was like alwayssomething I was like, yep, I
want to do that so I'm like assoon as I know our date.
Speaker 2 (27:03):
I'm booking after the tone um, because I ship you the
phone and everything like yeah,and you can pick the color, so
um it, it and it's so muchbetter than a guest book, I mean
, which is also cool, but it's.
It's like you get to hear theirvoice.
Yeah, I think that would be.
I think that would be so coolto have that, like I would
actually want that right now.
Speaker 1 (27:23):
Yeah, I think that's really cool.
You get to hear like whateverybody would and also like
towards the end of the nightpeople are like, oh yeah,
whatever, and I mean I have thatfrom the wedding video?
Speaker 2 (27:33):
yeah, um, for sure, but um, which is also fun to see
.
Yeah, but um, but I like theafter the tone thing sounds cool
yeah, so like I definitely I'veI've always wanted to do that.
Speaker 1 (27:47):
I don't know like I care about like getting my nails
done.
Speaker 2 (27:50):
Yeah.
Speaker 1 (27:52):
Like those little things I feel like there, when
it comes to like wedding stuff,like I don't feel like super,
like uptight about anything, atleast yet, not yet.
Yeah, maybe that'll change, butI just feel like I'm'm like I
don't want it to be stress like,I want it to just be like
(28:13):
exactly like what we want it tobe.
And if it's not like and it nothave to be like some perfect
whatever like it like, howeverit's going to be, will be
perfect yeah, like that's justhow I feel.
I'm like just taking some of thepressure off of it, especially
because I'm like I'm reallyexcited about like the honeymoon
and like the stuff likebeforehand, like doing like a
(28:37):
bachelorette, like trip, likewith like my friends and stuff
like that.
Like I'm excited for that, um,and just like some of like the
lead up and and whatnot.
And oh, one thing that's superimportant to me is like doing
our own vows.
Speaker 2 (28:51):
Yeah.
Speaker 1 (28:51):
I've always been like we're writing our own vows.
I want that to be very personaland like we're having or we
haven't asked him yet, but we'regoing to ask somebody that is
like close, personal to us toofficiate.
So yeah, we, we're gonna havethat.
(29:12):
Like those.
The more personal things arewhat I care about, rather than
like the stuff for like the look, I guess if that makes sense
like I care more about how itfeels than like what other
people see, because, like andone thing Lindsay had said to me
she was like the thing aboutthe photos is like that's the
only thing from your wedding dayother than, obviously, the
(29:33):
after the tone thing that youget to keep.
Yeah, the rest of it is like amemory that you have and like an
experience which, like, isobviously important, but like
you physically get to have thesephotos forever, the experience
is something that you hold on totoo, For sure.
Yeah, and she was like that'ssuper important.
(29:54):
And she had said she was like Iwant it to feel like you would
never want to do it again,because you couldn't replicate
how perfect it was.
She was like that's my goal forall of my couples.
And I was like perfect goal forlike all of my couples and I
was like perfect, that isexactly what I want.
So, yeah, I I feel like I'm not,I'm trying not to be like high
(30:14):
strung or high stress like, andjust care about the things that
are, like the relationships withthe people, yeah that we will,
that will be there.
Like I'm just more excited tohave all those people that we
love, like in one space.
Like I think that's so cool.
Yeah, so yeah, and we'll havelike a sweetheart table.
I always wanted to do that,like, so that way it's like
(30:36):
there is a moment where we'rejust sitting, the two of us.
Yeah, yeah, because it'llbarely be like that.
Speaker 2 (30:41):
Yeah, so, yeah, yeah, I don't know if that's it, but
I think that's cool, I thinkthat's great.
Yeah, that's exciting.
Thank you for sharing.
Speaker 1 (30:51):
Yeah, Thank you for asking.
Yeah, I'm excited.
When I was talking to Lindsayabout this in the beginning I
was like the little Emily in meis like this is so crazy, Like
it's actually like reallyhappening, like this is an
actual thing.
It's actually like reallyhappening, like this is an
actual thing, that's happeningyeah so it like feels like it
(31:12):
doesn't hit me like that.
I'm like gonna be a bride,you're a bride yeah, I sent you
that picture.
Speaker 2 (31:19):
Did you get that picture, the bride picture from
when you were little?
No, you didn't.
I don't think so I sent it toyour phone.
You were dressed in the bridedress and you're sitting in
front of the ottoman.
Speaker 1 (31:34):
I don't remember, maybe I did wait.
Speaker 2 (31:39):
Let me look, all right I just remember you
dressing up as a bride and Ithought you were on the ottoman.
I thought I remembered yousitting on the ottoman, but
you're actually sitting in frontof it and I mean it's a picture
of a picture, so it's not likeit's that great.
Speaker 1 (31:58):
But it's not showing up in like our texts.
Speaker 2 (32:03):
All right, I'll have to look, maybe it didn't send.
Speaker 1 (32:09):
Yeah, no, I don't see it.
Oh wait this one.
Yes, that's so cute.
Speaker 2 (32:14):
Yeah, yeah, that's cute, Don't you look?
You look beautiful.
Speaker 1 (32:22):
Yeah, it just looks so like, I don't know, like just
sweet yeah, so pure For sure.
Yeah, so pure For sure, yeah,All right well, all right, well,
I think that's it.
I think that's it too.
Speaker 2 (32:37):
Yeah, all right, we'll see you in a couple weeks.
Speaker 1 (32:41):
Thank, you for listening.
Don't forget to like andsubscribe and all the good
things and tell us what you wantto hear about.
If you have any questions aboutwedding stuff, I would love to
answer that for sure any tipsthat you wish that you did or
you wish you didn't do.
That's valuable too so leavethem below.
(33:04):
But yeah, we'll see you in acouple weeks.
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