August 31, 2025 • 19 mins
We explore the importance of planting patience as a character trait in our children through both teaching and modeling this crucial skill. As mentors to our children, we must recognize they learn more from watching our behavior than from our verbal corrections, making our own patience practice essential for their development.
• Children observe and mimic our behaviors, including impatience and hasty decision-making
• Patience is the capacity to accept delays without becoming annoyed or anxious
• The "microwave mentality" often leads to poor decisions and regret
• Practice listing wants/needs with timeframes to identify patience challenges
• Consider whether immediate desires (like relationships or job changes) are truly beneficial
• Learning to accept "blocks" as blessings can prevent repeated mistakes
• Taking 24 hours before making important decisions helps cultivate patience
• Parents must actively teach life skills, not just correct behaviors
Tell another single mom about this podcast to help spread the message of intentional parenting and mentoring.
https://singlemomsunitedpodcast.com/
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Transcript
Episode Transcript
Available transcripts are automatically generated. Complete accuracy is not guaranteed.
Speaker 1 (00:01):
Hey ladies, welcome to the Mom2Mentor podcast.
If this is your first timejoining, welcome If you are a
repeat listener.
Thank you so much for yourloyalty.
I really truly appreciate itfrom the bottom of my heart.
(00:22):
Hey, I'm not going to prolongtoday's discussion or episode.
As you know, and as a repeatlistener, I've been planning a
virtual character garden, andthat garden consists of
identifying characteristictraits we want to plant into
(00:42):
your child or your children tohelp them be successful in this
world.
And this is also a reminder youare more than a mom, you are a
mentor.
And what is a mentor?
It's a person who gives helpand advice to those with less
experience about life, to thosewith less experience about life.
(01:04):
And who would that be?
That's right your children oryour child.
As parents and myself, I wasmore verbal than visual and
meaning.
I was correcting my children astrying to change that behavior.
They were displaying, versusnot always recognizing.
(01:26):
They're paying attention towhat they see.
Hmm, yeah, mom.
So guess what?
I'm not in this boat by myself.
Your children are also payingattention to what they see in
you, what type of example youare being in front of them.
So it's important for us to tryto display more positive
(01:49):
behaviors than negative and tryto consciously control what our
children see and hear.
I tell you from experience yeah, there's some things I saw my
kids doing that I know they onlysaw this behavior from me.
(02:10):
It was nothing that I said tothem.
This podcast is all aboutmentoring and parenting and
getting in position for ourchildren to be successful in
life, because at some pointyou're going to have to release
them into the world.
So let's prepare them so theycan be successful.
(02:32):
All right, I'm getting back ontopic here Again.
If you're a repeat listener,you know I have a tendency to
get off the exit on my journey.
So what am I talking abouttoday?
The character seed that I wantto plant today is patience.
Ooh, this is a hot topic andguess what?
(02:54):
I'm still working on me when itcomes to patience, and I guess
that some of you are in the sameposition when it comes to
waiting.
Right, you probably have thatmicrowave mentality of I need
this right now Because that'swhat a microwave does it speeds
(03:14):
up the process of cooking, right, and then it doesn't always
taste good in the microwave.
Sometimes you got to use astove, you got to use the oven
right way.
Sometimes you got to use astove, you got to use the oven
right.
Patience, and how to definepatience, what it is and why we
need it.
The definition of patience isthe mental capacity to accept or
(03:36):
tolerate delay that's the wordof the day.
Delay and resolving problemswithout becoming annoyed or
anxious for things we want orneed.
That's my problem and that'swhy I struggle sometimes with
(03:57):
working in groups or teams,because I know what I want and I
know when I want it.
I don't like to keep talkingabout the same thing over and
over again.
That drives me bananas and I'msure with you as well, moms.
Not getting that resolution youneed immediately drives you
(04:20):
crazy.
And then, as a result of usgoing bananas, then we make some
bad decisions because we don'twant to wait.
And then we wonder why thatdecision is bad?
Because we wouldn't take thetime to research it, ask more
questions about it.
We just jump right in and thenafter the fact, oh crap, why did
(04:46):
I do that?
It's not because we'reimpatient.
Why do we need patience?
Because everything we ask orwant isn't going to happen
immediately, and it's not alwaysa bad thing for it not to
happen immediately.
Right, there could be a reason.
(05:06):
There could be a block ofsomething that's out there.
That's better.
But if we don't display thatpatience and allow the better to
happen, we're always going toget into this vicious cycle of
why did I do that?
That's how I know.
(05:28):
So, ladies, again, when you'remaking decisions, take your time
, think on it before you jump inwith both feet.
Yeah, at least 24 hours.
And again, talking to myself,I'm trying to work on myself
(05:48):
right here as well, and I thinkI'm doing pretty good.
I'm doing better when it comesto making decisions.
I am now waiting 24 hours oncritical issues.
I'm waiting that have long-termimpact.
We are going to have to makedecisions every day about one
(06:13):
thing or another and we have todisplay patience.
And when we display patienceand learn how to do that, then
we have to teach our children.
Everything is not going to beright when you ask for it, it's
just not.
If we want to cultivate ornurture patience, here's an
(06:37):
exercise I would challenge youto do List things that you want
or need.
Then add a time frame or dateyou want to receive your wants
or needs.
I use notebook and OneNote tocapture ideas and thoughts, so
you can do the same right.
Just take this opportunity,capture what you want or need
(07:04):
and put a time frame around it.
You may say, yeah, I need thisin 24 hours.
How are you going to get it?
You're going to borrow it.
You're going to get a secondjob.
What are you going to do?
How are you going to get it?
Watch where I'm going with this, because that 24 hours may come
around and you may not havethat money, and that's where
(07:26):
patience comes into play.
You may want a new relationship.
Why do you want a newrelationship?
I hear a lot of young ladiessaying I miss being in a
relationship, and that's fine.
But is it because of lonelinessor there's just a void in your
life that you think arelationship can feel?
(07:48):
Hmm, yeah, it may not be arelationship at all.
It may be you taking theopportunity to go after
something you really want inlife, related to your career,
your hobby, something that couldhelp fill that void.
(08:10):
So that doesn't mean you haveto have a man, and I think
having a man or being in arelationship is a good thing,
especially if you understandeach other and there's good
balance there.
But sometimes you're just notgoing to find that.
So do you go out and settle forany guy that comes along and
(08:34):
guess what?
Sometimes that happens becausewe think, well, I'm lonely.
This is how I feel theloneliness versus really
understanding that void thatyou're experiencing in your life
and going back and filling itwith just taking that hobby.
And going to another level.
(08:54):
Look, I'm podcasting and I loveit.
I absolutely love podcasting.
I was self-taught.
I was self-taught.
I went out and I did myresearch and I did my reviews
and I bought the equipment andall of that stuff and I enjoy it
.
It's one of my favorite thingsto do and even though I have
(09:24):
limited interaction with you allNow, does it take the place of
a relationship, kind of sort ofright?
But I'm at the stage of my lifewhere I'm rounding out life and
some things are more importantthan others.
Why do you want these items?
And once you put that down, andthen what type of timeframe
you're looking at for thesethings to happen, because that's
(09:47):
how you're going to define howpatient you are.
That's how we cultivate and weidentify where our level of
patience is, because that'simportant.
Again, remember, you're goingto have to pay this for it with
your children.
So do that exercise and I'dlove to know how that comes out
Now.
(10:07):
I just gave you an example of arelationship being in a
relationship, not being in arelationship.
But what about your job, yourcareer as moms?
We have children now, so it'smore than me, it's we, and so
some things have to change as aresult of the we.
(10:28):
We have income coming in, butit's a job that we may not like,
and that's okay.
But keep in mind, if you say Ijust can't stand the people I
work with, if you say I justcan't stand the people I work
with, well, guess what, moms,the grass isn't always greener
next door, at another place ofemployment, because you still
(10:50):
have people.
So do you learn how to dealwith those people?
And then you set up a time frame, right, if you're having issues
with your coworkers, then OK,let me get this 30, 60 days, and
maybe it's me and sometimes andagain I'm speaking to myself,
(11:11):
it's me, it's not them.
Sometimes it's me is how Ireceive things, and I'm already
prejudging and formulating myopinion, versus saying you know
what?
Take a step back, absorb whatis happening.
Now do you need to acknowledgehow that person approached you,
(11:34):
or do you say you know what?
Okay, whatever, now that I know, thank you for being honest and
I'm going to move on, and aresponse may never even be
required based on how thatperson approached you.
Yep, and guess what?
Now you just found peace.
But again we get in jobs.
(11:56):
We don't like them because wedon't like our coworkers, and
sometimes we don't even like theresponsibilities that we're
given, and so we're quick togive up and say I'm moving on to
the next one.
Well, guess what?
There's still going to be aprocess you got to follow.
There's still going to bepeople you have to work with.
So, building that patience,understanding the why, why
(12:24):
you're impatient, and what thevalue is when you learn to
develop patience Because whenyou learn to develop patience,
you're going to identify betterthings for you.
Mm-hmm, and understand thingstake time, just as with this
(12:45):
podcast, in this series that I'mdoing about planting seeds.
Anybody ever garden before?
You know, if you plant a seed,it's not.
Whatever you plant, it's notgoing to sprout up overnight.
You have to cultivate it.
You know I mentioned in the pastI'm a Christian and I would say
(13:07):
here recently I've asked God toblock anything that I've asked
for.
If it's not for me, block it.
I don't need additional drama,I don't need to be on that
carousel experiencing the samemistakes over and over and over
again, because I'm impatient.
(13:28):
So I said, god, if it's notmeant for me, block it.
If it's blocked, I'm good,thank you.
And I move on.
And I'm glad that I'm at thisarea in my life and I'm glad
that I'm at this area in my life.
I'm able to move on and say youknow what is not in your will,
(13:53):
I am going to accept the blockbecause this isn't meant for me,
because I'm tired of making thesame mistakes over and over and
over again because of lack ofpatience.
Because of lack of patience.
And I tell you, it's abeautiful thing when you don't
get what you want.
It really is.
(14:15):
So, ladies, the next time youthink about that relationship
and it doesn't work out, and hesays it's me, it's not, you
count your blessings, not.
You count your blessings.
Or that job you thought was foryou had your name written all
over it, and they say sorry, wefound a better candidate.
Count your blessings.
That's a good thing andunderstand that there's better
(14:38):
out there for you.
And that's how you explain itto your children If they don't
get something that they reallywant or think they need, there's
something better for you.
That's your talk off Again, notjust to your children, but to
you.
All right, ladies, now, if youenjoyed this episode, I
(14:59):
encourage you to tell anothersingle mom.
It's all about mentoring beingthat example for our children.
Yeah, because they're juststarting out in this world and
you're probably halfway inbetween life.
Right now, where I'm finishingout life, I've learned a lot
(15:23):
related to parenting and what'sneeded to be a good parent
Because, again, while I wasraising my children, there was a
lot of correcting happening,but I wasn't doing an effective
job with educating, talking withthem, teaching them about life.
(15:44):
I encourage you, moms, takethis opportunity.
Don't just correct yourchildren.
Teach them.
Don't put it on the schools,don't put it on other
institutions.
Own your responsibility as aparent to teach your children.
(16:07):
Hey, have a wonderful day, afantastic week and a marvelous
month.
Take care.
Hey ladies, welcome to the Mom2Mentor podcast.
If this is your first timejoining, welcome If you are a
repeat listener.
Thank you so much for yourloyalty.
I really truly appreciate itfrom the bottom of my heart.
(00:22):
Hey, I'm not going to prolongtoday's discussion or episode.
As you know, and as a repeatlistener, I've been planning a
virtual character garden, andthat garden consists of
identifying characteristictraits we want to plant into
(00:42):
your child or your children tohelp them be successful in this
world.
And this is also a reminder youare more than a mom, you are a
mentor.
And what is a mentor?
It's a person who gives helpand advice to those with less
experience about life, to thosewith less experience about life.
(01:04):
And who would that be?
That's right your children oryour child.
As parents and myself, I wasmore verbal than visual and
meaning.
I was correcting my children astrying to change that behavior.
They were displaying, versusnot always recognizing.
(01:26):
They're paying attention towhat they see.
Hmm, yeah, mom.
So guess what?
I'm not in this boat by myself.
Your children are also payingattention to what they see in
you, what type of example youare being in front of them.
So it's important for us to tryto display more positive
(01:49):
behaviors than negative and tryto consciously control what our
children see and hear.
I tell you from experience yeah, there's some things I saw my
kids doing that I know they onlysaw this behavior from me.
(02:10):
It was nothing that I said tothem.
This podcast is all aboutmentoring and parenting and
getting in position for ourchildren to be successful in
life, because at some pointyou're going to have to release
them into the world.
So let's prepare them so theycan be successful.
(02:32):
All right, I'm getting back ontopic here Again.
If you're a repeat listener,you know I have a tendency to
get off the exit on my journey.
So what am I talking abouttoday?
The character seed that I wantto plant today is patience.
Ooh, this is a hot topic andguess what?
(02:54):
I'm still working on me when itcomes to patience, and I guess
that some of you are in the sameposition when it comes to
waiting.
Right, you probably have thatmicrowave mentality of I need
this right now Because that'swhat a microwave does it speeds
(03:14):
up the process of cooking, right, and then it doesn't always
taste good in the microwave.
Sometimes you got to use astove, you got to use the oven
right way.
Sometimes you got to use astove, you got to use the oven
right.
Patience, and how to definepatience, what it is and why we
need it.
The definition of patience isthe mental capacity to accept or
(03:36):
tolerate delay that's the wordof the day.
Delay and resolving problemswithout becoming annoyed or
anxious for things we want orneed.
That's my problem and that'swhy I struggle sometimes with
(03:57):
working in groups or teams,because I know what I want and I
know when I want it.
I don't like to keep talkingabout the same thing over and
over again.
That drives me bananas and I'msure with you as well, moms.
Not getting that resolution youneed immediately drives you
(04:20):
crazy.
And then, as a result of usgoing bananas, then we make some
bad decisions because we don'twant to wait.
And then we wonder why thatdecision is bad?
Because we wouldn't take thetime to research it, ask more
questions about it.
We just jump right in and thenafter the fact, oh crap, why did
(04:46):
I do that?
It's not because we'reimpatient.
Why do we need patience?
Because everything we ask orwant isn't going to happen
immediately, and it's not alwaysa bad thing for it not to
happen immediately.
Right, there could be a reason.
(05:06):
There could be a block ofsomething that's out there.
That's better.
But if we don't display thatpatience and allow the better to
happen, we're always going toget into this vicious cycle of
why did I do that?
That's how I know.
(05:28):
So, ladies, again, when you'remaking decisions, take your time
, think on it before you jump inwith both feet.
Yeah, at least 24 hours.
And again, talking to myself,I'm trying to work on myself
(05:48):
right here as well, and I thinkI'm doing pretty good.
I'm doing better when it comesto making decisions.
I am now waiting 24 hours oncritical issues.
I'm waiting that have long-termimpact.
We are going to have to makedecisions every day about one
(06:13):
thing or another and we have todisplay patience.
And when we display patienceand learn how to do that, then
we have to teach our children.
Everything is not going to beright when you ask for it, it's
just not.
If we want to cultivate ornurture patience, here's an
(06:37):
exercise I would challenge youto do List things that you want
or need.
Then add a time frame or dateyou want to receive your wants
or needs.
I use notebook and OneNote tocapture ideas and thoughts, so
you can do the same right.
Just take this opportunity,capture what you want or need
(07:04):
and put a time frame around it.
You may say, yeah, I need thisin 24 hours.
How are you going to get it?
You're going to borrow it.
You're going to get a secondjob.
What are you going to do?
How are you going to get it?
Watch where I'm going with this, because that 24 hours may come
around and you may not havethat money, and that's where
(07:26):
patience comes into play.
You may want a new relationship.
Why do you want a newrelationship?
I hear a lot of young ladiessaying I miss being in a
relationship, and that's fine.
But is it because of lonelinessor there's just a void in your
life that you think arelationship can feel?
(07:48):
Hmm, yeah, it may not be arelationship at all.
It may be you taking theopportunity to go after
something you really want inlife, related to your career,
your hobby, something that couldhelp fill that void.
(08:10):
So that doesn't mean you haveto have a man, and I think
having a man or being in arelationship is a good thing,
especially if you understandeach other and there's good
balance there.
But sometimes you're just notgoing to find that.
So do you go out and settle forany guy that comes along and
(08:34):
guess what?
Sometimes that happens becausewe think, well, I'm lonely.
This is how I feel theloneliness versus really
understanding that void thatyou're experiencing in your life
and going back and filling itwith just taking that hobby.
And going to another level.
(08:54):
Look, I'm podcasting and I loveit.
I absolutely love podcasting.
I was self-taught.
I was self-taught.
I went out and I did myresearch and I did my reviews
and I bought the equipment andall of that stuff and I enjoy it
.
It's one of my favorite thingsto do and even though I have
(09:24):
limited interaction with you allNow, does it take the place of
a relationship, kind of sort ofright?
But I'm at the stage of my lifewhere I'm rounding out life and
some things are more importantthan others.
Why do you want these items?
And once you put that down, andthen what type of timeframe
you're looking at for thesethings to happen, because that's
(09:47):
how you're going to define howpatient you are.
That's how we cultivate and weidentify where our level of
patience is, because that'simportant.
Again, remember, you're goingto have to pay this for it with
your children.
So do that exercise and I'dlove to know how that comes out
Now.
(10:07):
I just gave you an example of arelationship being in a
relationship, not being in arelationship.
But what about your job, yourcareer as moms?
We have children now, so it'smore than me, it's we, and so
some things have to change as aresult of the we.
(10:28):
We have income coming in, butit's a job that we may not like,
and that's okay.
But keep in mind, if you say Ijust can't stand the people I
work with, if you say I justcan't stand the people I work
with, well, guess what, moms,the grass isn't always greener
next door, at another place ofemployment, because you still
(10:50):
have people.
So do you learn how to dealwith those people?
And then you set up a time frame, right, if you're having issues
with your coworkers, then OK,let me get this 30, 60 days, and
maybe it's me and sometimes andagain I'm speaking to myself,
(11:11):
it's me, it's not them.
Sometimes it's me is how Ireceive things, and I'm already
prejudging and formulating myopinion, versus saying you know
what?
Take a step back, absorb whatis happening.
Now do you need to acknowledgehow that person approached you,
(11:34):
or do you say you know what?
Okay, whatever, now that I know, thank you for being honest and
I'm going to move on, and aresponse may never even be
required based on how thatperson approached you.
Yep, and guess what?
Now you just found peace.
But again we get in jobs.
(11:56):
We don't like them because wedon't like our coworkers, and
sometimes we don't even like theresponsibilities that we're
given, and so we're quick togive up and say I'm moving on to
the next one.
Well, guess what?
There's still going to be aprocess you got to follow.
There's still going to bepeople you have to work with.
So, building that patience,understanding the why, why
(12:24):
you're impatient, and what thevalue is when you learn to
develop patience Because whenyou learn to develop patience,
you're going to identify betterthings for you.
Mm-hmm, and understand thingstake time, just as with this
(12:45):
podcast, in this series that I'mdoing about planting seeds.
Anybody ever garden before?
You know, if you plant a seed,it's not.
Whatever you plant, it's notgoing to sprout up overnight.
You have to cultivate it.
You know I mentioned in the pastI'm a Christian and I would say
(13:07):
here recently I've asked God toblock anything that I've asked
for.
If it's not for me, block it.
I don't need additional drama,I don't need to be on that
carousel experiencing the samemistakes over and over and over
again, because I'm impatient.
(13:28):
So I said, god, if it's notmeant for me, block it.
If it's blocked, I'm good,thank you.
And I move on.
And I'm glad that I'm at thisarea in my life and I'm glad
that I'm at this area in my life.
I'm able to move on and say youknow what is not in your will,
(13:53):
I am going to accept the blockbecause this isn't meant for me,
because I'm tired of making thesame mistakes over and over and
over again because of lack ofpatience.
Because of lack of patience.
And I tell you, it's abeautiful thing when you don't
get what you want.
It really is.
(14:15):
So, ladies, the next time youthink about that relationship
and it doesn't work out, and hesays it's me, it's not, you
count your blessings, not.
You count your blessings.
Or that job you thought was foryou had your name written all
over it, and they say sorry, wefound a better candidate.
Count your blessings.
That's a good thing andunderstand that there's better
(14:38):
out there for you.
And that's how you explain itto your children If they don't
get something that they reallywant or think they need, there's
something better for you.
That's your talk off Again, notjust to your children, but to
you.
All right, ladies, now, if youenjoyed this episode, I
(14:59):
encourage you to tell anothersingle mom.
It's all about mentoring beingthat example for our children.
Yeah, because they're juststarting out in this world and
you're probably halfway inbetween life.
Right now, where I'm finishingout life, I've learned a lot
(15:23):
related to parenting and what'sneeded to be a good parent
Because, again, while I wasraising my children, there was a
lot of correcting happening,but I wasn't doing an effective
job with educating, talking withthem, teaching them about life.
(15:44):
I encourage you, moms, takethis opportunity.
Don't just correct yourchildren.
Teach them.
Don't put it on the schools,don't put it on other
institutions.
Own your responsibility as aparent to teach your children.
(16:07):
Hey, have a wonderful day, afantastic week and a marvelous
month.
Take care.
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