Teaching By Example Turns Hard Days Into Lessons

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We explore determination as a teachable, visible habit that kids absorb by watching us. From a slow start to 17,250 downloads, we show how small goals, persistence, and self-compassion turn moms into mentors.

• reframing from nurturer to mentor
• why modeling beats lecturing for kids
• defining clear, achievable goals
• staying persistent through slow seasons
• learning from challenges with flexibility
• practicing self-discipline without perfectionism
• reconnecting to motivation rooted in children’s needs
• simple habits that make resilience visible at home

If you did, leave me some feedback. I'd love to hear from you because we are determined as moms.

https://singlemomsunitedpodcast.com/

As Mom's we are more than nurturers we are Mentors to our children.

Episode Transcript

SPEAKER_00 (00:01):
Hey ladies, welcome to the Mom to Mentor podcast.
If this is your first timejoining, welcome.
If you are a repeat listener,thank you for your loyalty.
Hey, it's a new week, a newmonth, and new expectations.

(00:21):
Remember, you are more than justa mom and a nurturer and a
provider.
You are a mentor, meaning youare setting that example for
your children as it relates totheir behavior and how they
conduct themselves in life.
And so this podcast is designedto encourage, motivate, and also

(00:47):
educate, that reminding you, youcan do this.
Yeah, there are going to be somehard days, and you're like, you
know what, I just don't have itin me.
How do I know?
Yeah.
Been there, done that, have thet-shirt.
I have several t-shirts.
When it comes to being a parentand a single parent, at that,

(01:10):
there are going to be morechallenging days than not, but
you'll get through it.
And so, as a result of thispodcast, and what I'm trying to
introduce to you is that you canset that example for your
children.
You can be that mentor.

(01:33):
And while I'm providing you withexamples and seeds or character
seeds that you can plant withinyour children, just keep in mind
they are visual.
They are going to adapt to whatthey see before they adapt to
what they hear.
And we want to get out of thecorrecting mode, mom.

(01:56):
And as I was raising mychildren, I was doing a lot of
correcting, but I wasn't doing alot of educating.
Why wasn't I doing a lot ofeducating?
Because I didn't know I wassupposed to.
And that's what makes thispodcast different.
Because I'm going to give youthe tools and the resources that

(02:20):
you can tap into as it relatesto educating your children.
All right, so let's get theparty started for the day.
We're talking aboutdetermination today.
And so I'm going to make this alittle more personal than the
other episodes because I am on ajourney of really trying to

(02:46):
embrace determination.
And it links back to thispodcast that I started three
plus years ago.
And thankfully, as of thisweekend, I'm at 17,250
downloads.
So thank you, all of you allthat come back and you that are
just arriving per se andlistening to this podcast.

(03:10):
Thank you so much all over theworld, all over the country.
Wow.
So I must be doing somethingright.
So again, this topic links backto determination because
certainly I never envisionedthat I would have 17,250

(03:31):
downloads of this podcast.
And it's like, wow, and wow.
And it started off slow.
I'm not gonna beat around thebush related to that.
It started off real slow.
And that's where determinationcomes in at.
I've tweaked some things sinceI've started this podcast.

(03:52):
As many of you know that havebeen following me or are
following me.
It started off with Single MomsUnited, right?
Because I didn't know what topicor label that I wanted to give
this podcast.
But I know that I'm a singlemom.
I know that I was able toaccomplish some things

(04:14):
throughout life with my kids andgetting my degree and doing some
other things.
And again, alone, right?
That's why it started off withSingle Moms United.
But as I'm transitioning andmoving forward and as I'm
talking through things, now istime to update the title to Mom

(04:37):
to Mentor, because we are morethan just nurturers and
providers.
One thing that I know with mykids as they were growing up,
they did a lot of mimicking ofmy behaviors.
That's how I know that we haveto go to the next level, ladies,

(05:00):
as far as what we allow ourchildren to see.
And also how we are providingthat example to them.
We can talk until we're blue inthe face, but they are going to
pay attention to what they see.
And this is going to make iteasier for you because now you

(05:20):
don't have to sit down and theconversation doesn't have to be
uncomfortable.
Now you're trying to find theright words, you're trying to
find this, you're trying toexplain it so that they
understand.
And all they have to do is seeyou do it.
It's just that simple, mom.
So today's topic is really moreso for you.

(05:45):
And once I share this with you,then your children are going to
see you adapting these behaviorsand incorporating these
behaviors in your life becausethat's how they learn.
All right.
So today's topic again is aboutdetermination.

(06:08):
And as a mom, we're going tohave hard days.
You're just going to have that.
And so when you have those harddays, it's easy to give up.
It's easy to say, I'm done.
I'm finished.
I don't want to do this anymore.
I'm good.
Let's hit restart, reset on mylife because I didn't intend for

(06:32):
it to transact this way.
And that's fair.
That is absolutely fair to havethat mentality.
But you can't act on it becausethe kids are here.
It's a done deal.
So you can't act on it, but it'sfair to have that mindset.

(06:52):
But you have to becomedetermined that I'm going to get
through this.
Yeah.
Ask me how I know all thechallenges that I went through
with raising my kids.
I was determined.
One setback is not going to puta period at the end of the

(07:15):
sentence.
It's only a comma.
When we think aboutdetermination, why do we need
it?
Determination is crucial forsuccess as it involves the
commitment to achieve goals,regardless of obstacles.
We don't give up when faced withobstacles or challenges.

(07:39):
When you think of the worddetermination, link it to don't
give up.
That's it.
That's the bottom line.
I don't care what you encounter,keep going, moms.
Keep moving.
Why?
Because your children are there.
You can't go back and changethings.

(08:01):
So you have to move forward.
You have to develop thatdetermined mindset that I'm
going to get through this.
All right.
So I'm going to give you somepractical advice that you can
use to help you achieve yourgoals and so that you remain

(08:21):
determined.
The first one is set cleargoals.
Define what you want to achieveand create specific and
measurable goals to stayfocused.
Again, back to my podcast orthis podcast.
I don't need 100 moms to comeand say, oh, great, you did

(08:43):
wonderful and I'm doing this,I'm doing that.
My goal has always been one, tomake a difference with one.
Why did I set my goal at one?
Because it's more achievable.
It's just that simple.
So if one young lady comes backand says, hey, thank you so
much.
I really appreciate yourpodcast.

(09:06):
I've adopted some things basedon what you shared, and I've
tried to incorporate it in mylife.
And as a result of that, I'mseeing some positive changes.
And guess what, ladies?
I've gotten that.
And I've gotten it multipletimes.
So I've achieved my goal.
Something else to consider.

(09:26):
Stay persistent.
Use strategies to overcomeobstacles and maintain
motivation over time.
I told you I started off withone name, one title, and now I'm
transitioning to another titleagain to be more aligned with
the goals of where I'm trying tomake that achievement as it

(09:52):
relates to you adopting andbeing able to educate your
children.
Next, learn from challenges.
Understand that determination isnot about stubbornness, it's
about resilience and the abilityto adapt.
Again, when I started mypodcast, I was I've had several

(10:16):
microphones over time.
I used a different software.
So I used different thingsbecause I didn't like the way I
sounded.

(10:43):
So let me go over here and trythis.
Let me try this new microphone.
Let me see how to betterposition where I'm doing my
recording.
So all of these things I takeinto consideration because I
want to stay persistent.
I'm not gonna let one thing stopthis podcast from happening

(11:06):
because it's too important.
Again, learn from challenges.
We're also talking aboutpractice self-discipline.
Develop habits that increaseyour chances of reaching your
goals and stay committed tothem.
Now, initially, I said I'm gonnaproduce one episode a week.

(11:28):
Depending on what's going on inmy life, sometimes it's been
produce an episode a month,unfortunately.
But I still say that while Ididn't meet my expectation of
producing an episode every week,the good news is I didn't stop.
I slowed down, but I didn'tstop.

(11:50):
And that's what we're talkingabout.
Practice that self-discipline,mom.
Whatever you're going through,whatever those challenges are,
embrace it.
You can slow down, and that'sfair, but don't stop.
And then reflect on yourmotivation.
Regularly assess what drives youand ensure your goals are

(12:15):
meaningful and relevant to youraspirations.
Yeah, what motivates you?
And long story short, ladies,for you as moms, it should be
your children.
I want to be the best parentthat I know how to be.
Not a perfect parent, but a goodparent.

(12:36):
And I've told you time and timeagain that a good mom teaches.
It doesn't mean you're perfect,it doesn't mean you're gonna get
it right all the time, but itmeans that I am focused on
teaching my children so they canbe successful in this life.

(12:58):
When it's time for them to goout and adventure on their own,
I want them to not take life soserious that I don't that
they're saying, I don't want todo this anymore.
But saying, hey, this is achallenge my mom told me about,
and this is what she said that Ishould do.

(13:21):
Or this is how I saw her handleher challenge.
Or challenges.
I'm sorry, because it's going tobe multiple.
Because as soon as you get overone, here comes another
challenge that you're going tohave to address.
And it starts with you.
Get motivated, mom, because yourkids are watching.

(13:48):
Now, by applying theseprinciples, you can enhance your
determination and improve yourchances of achieving your
objective.
And what is your objective?
Being the best mom that you knowhow to be.
All right, ladies.
I hope you enjoyed today'sepisode.

(14:09):
If you did, leave me somefeedback.
I'd love to hear from youbecause we are determined as
moms.
Yeah, that's part of ourcharacter.
It's we're determined.
We're more than just nurturersand providers.
We are examples and we aredetermined to not only meet our

(14:32):
goal as being a good parent, butexceeding that goal.
All right, you have a great day.
Take care.