September 8, 2024 • 33 mins
How do you navigate life when the unexpected hits hard? Meet Kim, a devoted mother and grandmother whose life literally begins to spin when she suddenly develops Mal de Débarquement Syndrome (MDDS), a rare and perplexing neurological condition. If that wasn't enough, Kim's health continues to nosedive as she stubbornly refuses to figure out a new "normal," which results in a battle for her life from septic shock, respiratory failure, hypoxia, and severe memory loss. Unable to recognize familiar faces and places, she turns to journaling and spiritual reflection to document her healing journey and record how she sees Christ and miracles throughout her day. This chapter is a testament to the transformative power of faith, emphasizing how embracing Jesus Christ's plan for us can bring peace and perspective even in the most challenging times.
Please reach out to me if you are interested in sharing your story! I would LOVE to hear from you. :)
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Episode Transcript
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Lily (00:06):
Hello everyone and welcome to.
More Than Coincidence,remembering Jesus Christ in your
Story.
As the author and finisher ofour faith, our Savior writes
personal experiences into eachof our lives which can later
strengthen, empower and bring uspeace upon reflection.
This podcast is dedicated tosharing these anchoring memories
(00:26):
from everyone's unique storiesin order to collectively
remember and testify of thereality of Jesus Christ and his
presence in our lives.
I'm your host, lily, and I'mvery excited to share these
experiences together.
Welcome everybody to thepodcast tonight.
Today we have Kim.
How are you, kim?
Kim (00:44):
Hi, I'm doing great.
Thank you for having me.
Will you introduce yourself foreverybody, Sure?
So my name is Kim Bulpit.
I have five children and threegrandchildren, a son-in-law and
a daughter-in-law, and I live inLehigh Utah.
Lily (01:02):
Yeah, you're one of the coolest people I know in the
Lord.
Kim (01:06):
Well, you're my spiritual big sister, even though you
could be one of my youngestchildren.
I'm glad.
I'm glad that you're here withme.
Lily (01:14):
No, it's good, we get it.
We get to teach each other.
Yes, absolutely.
I will ask you the question,kim what memories do you have in
your life that you reflect on,that prick your heart and
remembrance of Jesus Christ andanchor you to him?
Kim (01:26):
Oh, there's so many, so many, some of the most recent I
can talk about today becausethey're recent, yeah, and they
prick my heart a lot, uh-huh,because I'm still working on
some of them, right, a lot,because I'm still working on
some of them, right.
Um, my two youngest are twins.
(01:48):
Last July we sent them off,actually end of June, sent them
off on their missions.
I can't believe it's been a year, it has been a year.
Part of me is like, oh, my gosh, it's been a year.
And the other part of me islike, oh, it's only been a year.
Right, yeah, and I would lovefor them to be home, but at the
same time I don't want them tobe anywhere else.
(02:08):
Right?
They cannot learn what they'relearning right now in any other
way, exactly In any othercapacity, in any other short
two-year duration of time.
That spiritual growth is thatpricking themselves in
remembrance of Christ.
This is the best thing they cando.
So I'm glad they're there.
They're good examples to me.
So they left.
(02:29):
I was an empty nester, myhusband and I empty nesters.
And we thought, wow, we're goingto have best time of our life
so much fun.
I was married at 19, had myfirst baby two weeks before my
first anniversary.
So I was, I was a, I was ateenage.
Um, you're a young mom and andmarried and yeah, and all I did
(02:51):
was kids you've been going forforever, going, going, going
yeah.
So I was really looking forwardto this time, thinking, oh my
goodness, I'm, I'm, I'm going to, you know, do so many things
right.
So many, now, many.
Now is the time.
Lily (03:04):
I've earned this.
I definitely have earned this.
Kim (03:07):
Well, we had the opportunity, we sent them off
and then we had the opportunityto go on a beautiful Alaskan
cruise with my sweetmother-in-law and my in-laws and
it was fabulous.
I had a time of my life, it wasbeautiful.
Lily (03:19):
She wails.
We did, we saw all kinds ofthings and glaciers and
beautiful, oh my gosh, theweather, the captain, even said,
the weather has never been thisgood for me.
And it was just, it was likeperfect, it was it was really.
Kim (03:33):
I just was like oh, I can't wait to to bring my kids here.
Lily (03:37):
I want everyone to see this Right.
I've heard Alaskan cruises arereally awesome.
They're gorgeous.
Kim (03:41):
It's just, it's just something else.
Yeah, so we did that, got backand was doing great.
About two days after I umstarted to feel a little sick, I
thought well, maybe I have thisstomach flu.
I'm a little nauseous, I'm alittle dizzy, something's off.
During that whole day, right bythe end of the day, I, I, I
(04:04):
felt like, oh, my goodness,something is really off, I have
to go lay down.
I went and laid down arounddinner time and as soon as I
laid down I realized I was sodizzy and not like spinning
dizzy, like being on asuspension bridge with people
jumping around you.
Oh my gosh, and you're notholding on Right, you're just
(04:27):
going up and down and you'refree falling at the same time.
It was the weirdest, oh my gosh, and it was so it was.
it was so panicky and it made mefeel so sick and out of control
, yeah, and I yelled to myhusband to come in and he came
in and I tried to explain how Iwas feeling and I tried to get
up and I fell to the ground, Icouldn't walk.
(04:49):
I could not walk Not because mymuscles were not strong enough,
well, but the spinning like youcouldn't even keep your balance
.
I could not figure which waywas up and down at the time.
So he took me um to the ER and Iwas diagnosed with something
called malday debarkmentsyndrome.
Mdds, okay, yeah, I've neverheard of it.
(05:10):
It's because it's rare I hadnever heard of it either.
At first I thought is thisvertigo?
Like what, what?
Lily (05:15):
is yeah, or like I just got off a boat and maybe caught
something on the cruise someinner ear or something, I didn't
know.
Kim (05:21):
I just thought oh yeah, this is.
They're gonna give me somemedicine.
I'll see a doctor if they needto, and then we'll be fine.
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
So they did give me somemedicine.
They sent me to an ENT.
They sent me to a chiropractor.
They sent me to a physicaltherapist.
They sent me to I saw aneurologist.
We went all these differentroutes to find out what to do
(05:42):
with this.
It wasn't anything other thanan incorrect neuropathway in my
brain, so I was born with thisgenetic predisposition for this.
But in order for it to come out, this incorrect neuropathway,
you have to have the exact setof circumstances Usually women
(06:03):
around my age, type A,personalities involved in a lot
of things you know, always gotsomething going.
Maybe puts a lot of pressure onthemselves.
And the funnest part of thisall is like, usually in
menopause ding, ding, ding me, Ihave everything.
Lily (06:21):
Just you know just everything, so I found out.
Kim (06:25):
this is really rare, but it has to have the perfect storm,
and I was the perfect storm.
So I thought, well, okay, thisis, this is what it is.
I, I, it was 24, seven, norelief.
Um, it was really hard to get afork to my mouth.
I couldn't brush my hair orbrush my teeth.
You know general, anything thatyou're doing with your body
(06:46):
sitting Sitting, yeah, gettingout of bed anything Anything was
way off and I would fall, so Ineeded a lot of help.
I started some balance training.
I found a really great doctor inColorado who deals with MDDS
specifically and got to startseeing her via thankfully we
(07:07):
have the internet.
Lily (07:08):
Yeah, the telehealth, so we can do telehealth.
Kim (07:11):
Got to do that, because there was no way I was traveling
.
Lily (07:13):
Yeah, no way.
Kim (07:14):
Riding in a car was hard.
Just anything was hard Right.
So I came to find out that thisis something that doesn't have
a cure.
It's something that can be putinto remission, but it can take
some time and there's a lot ofthings I had to do to get it
into remission a lot of things Ihad to give up.
My doctor said you're going tohave to stop working, and I
(07:38):
worked as a computer teacher foran elementary school.
Lily (07:41):
I taught.
Kim (07:42):
K through three.
I saw them all once a week.
They were my school babies.
Lily (07:45):
I called them, my school babies, especially as an empty
nester, you're probably lookingforward to still having like
kids in your life and this wasmy, the beginning of my fifth
year teaching them.
And.
Kim (07:55):
I, just I was in my comfort zone and I was like you know,
the Lord is so good to me I'm anempty nester.
Lily (08:02):
I've got my dream job.
Kim (08:03):
I have time on my hands.
I'm young enough to be able toexperience and do things.
You know, my health is great.
I just I was really excited andthen I had this heavy weight
thrown on me that rocked myworld.
Well, I'm kind of stubborn, youknow type.
Lily (08:25):
A personality, I can do this.
No, I can't relate to that atall, right, so I told my doctors
well, I'm not going to quitwork.
Kim (08:33):
I can do this.
I can do this Right.
So they had to give me tools.
They I wore ankle weightsaround my ankles.
Does that help?
Like just ground you something.
It helped ground me Kind ofinteresting, right?
Yeah, and my focus was whattools do I need to be able to
continue doing what I want to do?
Yeah, my tools were medication,my tools were learning about
(08:59):
balance.
My tools were strengthening mybody and my muscles in ways that
I hadn't been before.
Right, I was literallyrelearning to walk, relearning
to take care of myself.
Yeah, and those were my tools.
That's what I focused on.
I didn't forget about JesusChrist.
I didn't forget about myrelationship with him.
(09:20):
I didn't forget about howimportant he was to me and what
that was.
Lily (09:24):
Yeah.
Kim (09:24):
But my focus was Was elsewhere, elsewhere.
Lily (09:28):
Right.
Kim (09:29):
And so time went on and I wasn't getting healthy very fast
and I was getting frustratedand I remember telling my
husband this is going on forever.
I can't see an end to this.
They said it could take acouple of months.
It could take maybe up to ayear.
You just never know how longit'll take to get it in
remission.
Well, school started.
(09:50):
One of my favorite littlekindergartners noticed that I
was wearing something on myankles and he said Mrs Bullpit,
why are you wearing sausages onyour ankles?
Lily (10:02):
I thought that was about that.
Kim (10:04):
First of all, they are so honest.
They are so honest and and itjust made me giggle and see,
instead of this heaviness thatwas pulling me down during that
day, it made me giggle.
Lily (10:15):
And I thought you're right .
I am wearing sausages on myankle.
Kim (10:20):
The kids were so sweet.
Lily (10:22):
My school was so sweet.
Kim (10:23):
I had parents telling me oh , my child prays for you.
I had other parents telling memy child goes to the temple and
puts your name in the temple.
Yeah, wow.
And I was so touched Right bythem remembering what was
important yeah, remembering themost important things to help me
get through things Right.
(10:43):
And I had glimpses ofremembering that, and then I
would go back to focusing on mytools.
Yeah, tools are good, don't getme wrong.
Yeah, that was like my focus.
Yeah, tools are good, don't getme wrong.
Yeah, yeah, yeah, that was likemy focus, right, right.
So October came.
I had bronchitis for about amonth and a half oh my gosh.
(11:04):
And the doctor had tried, inaddition to you know, all this
MDDS, my world was literallyrocking and I had antibiotics
and steroids and and I usuallyget sick in the winter and I
have a cough for a few months,and so I thought well, this is
what I'm doing again.
It's fine, I just pushedthrough.
I would get winded.
But then I would tell myself,right, oh, just push through,
(11:27):
you're fine.
I want my job, I want my kids.
Lily (11:29):
I don't want to stop.
Kim (11:30):
I'll be fine, it's not contagious, so I'm not hurting
them.
Yeah, because the doctors toldme what I had was not contagious
with my cough and stuff.
Right, it is something that Iturned into something.
Lily (11:40):
So just keep going, it's not hurting anyone, just keep
going.
Kim (11:44):
I need this job.
I want this job.
I like the fulfillment it givesme.
I like the connection with thechildren, with the wonderful
people at my school that workedthere.
I liked the extra money so Icould go travel and see my
grandchildren and do fun things.
I got a lot from it, so Ipushed through.
Lily (12:02):
I think it's almost a way for you to find control in your
life when you literally are outof control physically.
Like it was maybe you even justtrying to find some sense of,
some semblance of normalcy, likeI am not an invalid, like I can
still do these things and evenmaybe proving to yourself like I
can still function.
Kim (12:19):
That's so profound, that is exactly that is exactly what I
had told my, my husband.
This gives me a sense ofpurpose.
This is my normal.
Lily (12:32):
Right.
This makes me feel more normalto be able to go and do this,
because then, when I come home,I have to crash because I'm
exhausted.
Kim (12:40):
I have to sleep.
I have to, whatever that is,but that I could pretend nothing
was wrong, exactly, exactly.
So I pushed through, keptpretending.
One morning I got up to getready for school, realized I was
way off.
So I decided well, I'll justrotate some Tylenol and Advil
today, just see how it goes,I'll just see how I go at school
(13:02):
and the shower.
That morning I almost fellthree times and it wasn't
because of my motion, it was adifferent feeling of falling, it
kind of caught me off guard.
So I thought, well, I'm going tolay down for a minute but I'll
be fine, Called in sick to workgot a sub Right Thought well,
I'll be fine.
Lily (13:20):
Um.
Kim (13:28):
I had this feeling and this thought came into my head.
Something is seriously wrong.
So I thought, well, I'm goingto lay here the next thing I
knew my fingers are literallytouch, texting my husband Like.
I didn't even realize I wasdoing it.
Something is wrong.
Well, he came home and I toldhim I just need to sleep and
I'll probably be fine.
He said I want to take you tothe ER.
Lily (13:40):
Yeah, I would say sleeping is probably not good for
something with a brain problemright, right, me.
Kim (13:46):
Being me was like just give me some time and I'll be fine,
just watch me today.
Just watch me today yeah, well,part way he came in and said no
, you're going to the ER rightnow.
Yeah, within 10 minutes ofbeing in the ER, I was diagnosed
with septic shock.
I had code sepsis.
No, I don't remember most ofthis, I just know what the
doctors told me, and my husbandand my parents ended up coming
(14:09):
over and told me my bronchitishad turned to pneumonia.
yeah, I had passed the levels ofsevere sepsis to septic shock.
Um, my heart had damage.
I had a punctured lung.
My lungs 50 percent weredamaged and black and not.
The doctors thought that thepulmonologist kept asking if I'd
(14:30):
been a smoker my whole life.
No, I've never smoked a day inmy life.
Yeah, I actually feel like I'mallergic to cigarette smoke.
Lily (14:36):
The symptoms I get when I smell it, yeah.
Kim (14:38):
I had.
I had respiratory failure withhypoxia.
It did damage in my brain, itdid damage to my liver.
Lily (14:46):
Yeah, everything, my heart , everything needs oxygen.
Kim (14:49):
Everything, everything.
It took three and a half tofour hours to stabilize me
enough to leave the er room togo up to the icu.
Wow, they didn't know if I wasgonna live or die right.
Um, I spent five days in theicu and didn't realize it was as
serious as it was until theytold me we didn't know if you
were gonna make it or not.
(15:09):
Three days of the icu.
I was on 24 hour watch.
They just didn't know if I wasgoing to make it or not.
Right, and thankfully, by thegrace of God, literally,
literally, I made it.
Yeah, and I went home.
And I remember going home andthinking what am I going to do?
(15:31):
What?
Lily (15:31):
am I going to do?
Kim (15:32):
I had to take time off work at that point.
Yeah, you cannot go back towork.
Lily (15:36):
Yeah, you can't justify that, you're literally coming
back from the dead.
So you need some time.
I was forced into this?
Kim (15:43):
Yeah, forced into this, and so I took the time off work.
Did you feel really?
Lily (15:49):
angry and bitter.
I feel like I'd be kind ofangry, like I thought I had
everything and then everythingcrashes again.
Kim (15:56):
I told my husband what am I supposed to learn from this?
What good has come, I know.
Through our trials we learn andwe grow, and good comes from it
.
I cannot see good right now Ican't see the good.
In fact, it was so hard and Iwas so sick and I had to be, in
oxygen at my house, right, and Ihad to have home health care
and there were times that I saidwhy didn't Heavenly Father just
(16:18):
let me die?
Right, this is too hard.
Everything's been taken awayfrom me.
Yeah, right, I also had memoryissues, right, because I had
loss of oxygen.
Yeah, I'd go into my closet andclothes some of the clothes
were new.
My husband's, like it was thebest best thing for for and it
(16:40):
came from.
This is your closet was like anew shopping experience for you
every day.
I didn't so so and there was.
Lily (16:46):
I thought I have never seen this shirt before.
Kim (16:48):
This is great.
Um, on the flip side, I didn'trecognize some of the people at
my, in my neighborhood or in myward I didn't recognize some of
the drawers in my house.
I didn't recognize some of thebuildings that had been there
for years and it terrified me,right, it was very scary it's
like what important things maybehave I lost?
Lily (17:08):
what have I lost?
What have I lost?
You don't even know.
Kim (17:11):
I didn't know what I didn't know.
In fact, I remember writingdown at know I didn't know what
I didn't know.
In fact, I remember writing downat one time I don't know what I
don't know, and that is morescary than not knowing what I
know.
Right, what I don't know?
Does that make sense?
Yeah, no, totally.
That was more scary to me.
Also, I learned about my brain.
It was like no, since I hadrespiratory failure with hypoxia
(17:34):
.
I learned that my brain waslike a wedge of Swiss cheese.
You cut a slice and every dayyou don't know which holes are
going to be where and how bigthey're going to be.
So sometimes I remembered somethings and sometimes I didn't.
Lily (17:46):
Yeah.
Kim (17:46):
That was very scary to me.
Lily (17:48):
Yeah.
Kim (17:48):
And frustrating Right frustrating right, I had days I
remember, about two months outafter being home from the
hospital, that I didn'tunderstand why I was sick and
why I was feeling the way I wasfeeling and what was going on.
And my husband said well, youwere in the ICU.
Yeah, I had to explaineverything again.
You had septic shock.
(18:10):
You almost died.
You've had some damage to yourvital organs and your brain
Right and I looked at him and Isaid why haven't?
Lily (18:22):
you told me and I was so mad, I feel so like to, you just
need like all the sticky noteseverywhere.
Kim (18:25):
That's when we realized that I needed a journal.
I needed to journal what I knewand what I had learned and I
started every day, what I knew,what I'd learned, what I was
grateful for, so that I couldsee in my own handwriting the
tender mercies from my heavenlyfather.
I could see Jesus Christhelping me along the way.
(18:47):
I had to write it down and eventhough my physical body and
brain could not remember, Icould see in my own handwriting
what was going on and how I wasimproving.
And the good Right, Because myfocus for so long had been what
are my tools?
What do I have to do to gethealthy?
What am?
Lily (19:06):
I forgetting.
Kim (19:07):
What am I?
And it was.
That was a constant state ofanxiety and like panic yeah, I
can't.
And panic and relying on thethings of man, right, right,
which in reality we still haveto do that.
We have to rely on the thingshere that are good for us, that
do help us, right, right.
But my general focus, my firstand foremost focus, had slipped
(19:31):
away from Jesus Christ.
Right and his role in helpingme through this and his role of
touching my heart and helping merealize the blessings, right,
and the tender mercies and thelittle miracles and the little
gains.
Yeah, without that Right I washeaded down in my progress.
(19:53):
Exactly, right, it's through himthat I can progress with these
other things Right, these othertools that I was given Right,
and I realized that I had reallygotten away from that.
Lily (20:07):
Yeah, so do you feel like you just really had to change
your perspective?
It's your perspective and yourparadigm shift exactly to help,
absolutely.
Kim (20:18):
I had been given so many blessings during this time.
I had faith in blessings.
I had been listening.
I didn't stop listening.
I mean, obviously there was alot of time I couldn't go to
church.
I didn't stop studying, though Ididn't stop listening and
trying to learn, right, but myfocus was so focused on healing
and getting my body healthy,which is good, right, but I had
(20:41):
to shift it through what meanswhat was the first and foremost
important meaning Instead ofbeing.
This is so hard every day.
I don't see the good in this.
Lily (20:50):
Yeah.
Kim (20:51):
I had to choose Jesus Right .
Don't see the good in this.
Yeah, I had to choose JesusRight.
I had to choose where he wasand how he was helping me every
single day, whether or not, hewould heal you.
Lily (21:01):
That's right.
Because I feel like, yeah, ifit were me, I'd be praying like
okay, you're supposed to be themaster healer, like when
something going to happen, right, yeah, or even just you know,
pray that I can find anotherdoctor that this medication
would.
Yeah, the thy will be done.
Portion.
Kim (21:22):
That we kind of.
I think that is the difference,thy will, I am following your
hand in my life Right Throughthis journey yeah, even though
it is not the journey I wouldhave chosen for myself, yeah,
yeah, yeah.
Like it usually isn't Right, butapparently he knows what's best
(21:44):
for me.
He knows what kim bull pitneeds to go through in this life
to become my best self in orderto be able to return and live
with him.
100.
I have faith and trust and Iknow that, right, I know that.
I know that through thehardships, right.
I remember my boys on a mission.
At this time I didn't know whatthey knew, or didn't know Cause
(22:05):
I had a lot of memory loss.
Lily (22:07):
Yeah, panicking that their mom was dying.
Kim (22:09):
Yeah Right, my, my kids and my husband kept them updated
the best they can without alsoworrying them too much.
Tried to give them, feed thempositives.
Yeah, but they were such asweet, tender, tender, miracle
mercies in my life to be able to.
We can now um video call themand talk video call them every
(22:31):
single week, yeah, and at firstI remember being a little like
oh my gosh, I have differentdays with each boy.
I want them on the same day.
I want to see their faces onthe same day.
Lily (22:38):
How come?
Kim (22:39):
I can't have the same p-day when I can video and I can see
them together.
Lily (22:43):
But now with your memory loss.
You wouldn't remember if whichday was.
Kim (22:47):
I don't remember who I've talked to what or when.
Anyway, right, but I came tofind that the blessing in that
different day yeah was was atender mercy so I got forward to
.
I got more things to lookforward to during my week.
Yeah, you know, I got more daysto experience it.
That was wonderful.
I remember my son Trevor oneday, knowing some of the things
(23:10):
I'd gone through and I wasfeeling frustrated at that point
.
Yeah, I might not be able to goback to work.
I had started back to work.
I had cut it down to very twodays a week.
Lily (23:19):
Yeah, and I had to have help?
Kim (23:20):
Yeah, and I had to have help, yeah, and I had to do the
minimum Right, but I was stillpushing and I remember feeling
so frustrated, like my healthhad only gotten better to a
certain point.
Right, and my son, trevor, saidhe had listened to a talk by
someone and I wish I could getcredit where credit is due.
Uh-huh, I can't remember who itwas, but it talked about are
(23:40):
you willing to give up what youwant most, what you love most,
for the God you love more?
Right, and that just hit melike a ton of bricks.
Yeah, wow.
Am I willing to give up pushingmy agenda?
Well, this job makes me happy.
This job is fulfilling to methis job.
I'm doing good things here thisis good.
(24:02):
Right of failing to the thisjob.
I'm doing good things here.
This is right, right for,ultimately, jesus christ, who
knows me intimately, right andis willing to help me along the
path that my heavenly fatherwants me to go on.
Am I willing to give that upfor those, jesus christ and my
and my heavenly father that Ilove more yeah, and it just to
(24:25):
the very core, hit me, wow, hitme Well.
Miracle number two that sameweek my other son had not talked
to Trevor, my other missionaryson, nathan they had not
conversed didn't know I wasgoing through this.
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
And Nathan said I have athought I want to share with you
(24:45):
, mom.
And he brought up that veryexact talk about giving up what
we want most and what we lovemost for the God who loves us
and who we love more, and sothat was my sign yes, quit my
job.
Quit my job, quit my job.
Change paths and let JesusChrist be the lens that I look
(25:09):
through right to help me heal,to help me do whatever my
journey is.
Yeah, in this life, to learnwhatever I need to through him.
I wasn't doing bad thingsbefore, right, but obviously
such an abrupt stop for me wasnot the path I was supposed.
Lily (25:28):
It was an abrupt turnaround yeah, I can't even
imagine how hard that would havebeen.
I would have been like, okay,one day a week, we'll just we'll
slowly ease out of this, andthat's what I did for a while
even after coming back from thedead.
I still decided I was going to,just you know a little bit here
and there, yeah, but giving itall up, as hard as that is as
(25:50):
hard as that was because I lovedit.
Kim (25:52):
I finally found like my purpose I felt like in life
Right Is to be with thesechildren and be able to teach
them about internet safety?
Lily (26:04):
Yeah, and important skills be able to teach them.
Kim (26:06):
We can't we can't necessarily talk about Jesus
Christ in school, but I talk tothem about their inner Jiminy
Cricket all the time you haveone you have an inner Jiminy
Cricket it is leading you.
Lily (26:16):
You listen to that right.
You know we couldn't talk aboutthose things.
Kim (26:19):
But I right, but I told them that because I felt it was
so important, so I thought I'mgiving up something so good.
Lily (26:25):
Yeah.
But, with for what, like youdon't even know Right now, I
don't know.
Kim (26:30):
Yeah, I still don't exactly know.
I have little ideas, littlethings.
Um, my dad has Parkinson's.
I was going to say, with allthe family stuff going on, and
now he has dementia parkinson's.
I was gonna say, with all thefamily stuff going on and now he
has dementia.
Yeah, and my dad type apersonality.
He was a bishop, he was a statepresident, he was a mission
president, he was a templepresident, he ran his own
(26:52):
company, he built it, he sold it, whoa, he, he, my dad, knew and
could do, in my opinion,everything, yeah, right and
clear, even up until he was 74.
I mean, he had some Parkinson'sduring that time, right, but he
was still going, but he wasstill my goodness, I wonder
where you get it from.
(27:14):
The apple doesn't feel far fromthe tree, fall far from the tree
.
But, um, watching him changethis past little while, yeah,
and losing some of himself indementia, right, and seeing him
struggle with Parkinson's andwatching his brain be confused
and forget and be scared, yeah.
Some of the things that I wentthrough during this with my
(27:36):
balance issues.
Lily (27:37):
Yeah.
Kim (27:38):
You know the falling.
We would laugh.
He was my shaky buddy, We'dfall together.
Lily (27:42):
It was fine.
Kim (27:43):
We, we had comfort in each other because we knew how each
other kind of felt.
Right, right.
Yes, and then my brain, theforgetting, the anxiety, the
depression that came with it.
Right, the scariness, theconfusion.
Right the crying and seeing himdo that at times.
Lily (28:00):
Right we were buddies, the mourning what you were morning.
Kim (28:04):
The loss yeah, like you have to go through that grieving
process.
I kind of feel like everythingthis past year and it's been
over just over a year since thisall has happened yeah, it's
helped me in some small wayconnect on a level with my dad
that no one else in my familycan they want to.
(28:25):
They're there for him, theylove him, they empathize with
him, they see the struggle andthey're so good to him.
But there's something about whatI went through, that we can sit
and talk and I can maybe helpexplain a little bit what he's
feeling when he can't get thewords Right Exactly and my dad
(28:49):
is my hero.
Yeah, if I can help be hiswords when he can't find them,
this is worth it.
If that's the only thing I'msupposed to learn.
Yeah, through quittingeverything and relying on Jesus
and having Jesus Christ prick myheart so much, in so many
different ways, yeah, helping mydad and being able to be his
(29:12):
words and sit with him in themud when it's ugly, yeah, then
it's all worth it.
Lily (29:19):
yeah which is crazy because, if you think about it,
it's going back to the one ofhow christ ministers, to the one
oh yeah and you're getting tohave that opportunity of
ministering to the one in thatrespect as well in a totally
unique way that only the saviorcould offer fully and completely
.
But you can even get a tinyglimpse of what even that could
(29:42):
be like, and that's reallyspecial.
Kim (29:45):
Absolutely.
It's so small, it's such asmall thing to be able to do,
but such a powerful, huge,life-changing, wonderful
experience for me and I'mstarting to see.
No, I don't understand why Iwent through everything I went
(30:06):
through or why it still plaguesme a little bit yeah yeah, but I
have such great faith in thepath that I need to follow, in
Jesus Christ being my lens thatI see through in order to do
(30:28):
everything else, and him beingmy anchor and him being yoked
with him, needing Jesus morethan I need air.
And I'm telling you when you'rein the hospital and you can't
breathe Right.
Lily (30:41):
Kind of puts a new perspective on things.
It's a big perspective.
Kim (30:44):
I had to struggle to breathe for so long, but guess
what?
Lily (30:47):
Yeah.
Kim (30:48):
There's so many things in my life that I have needed to
struggle and need Jesus morethan I need air, and when I'm
able to do that and I'm notperfect at this I am learning,
yeah, and I'm thankful I'mlearning, and I hope to always
continue to learn because I needit Right.
But when I reach out for himmore than I need air to breathe,
things are okay.
(31:09):
Yeah, might not be better or thebest, it's not easy, yeah, but
there's hope and there's healing, and there's peace and there's
happiness, yeah, and there'scalm in Jesus Christ.
I know that to be true withevery fiber of my being.
I can't deny it.
(31:30):
I've seen it, I felt it, I'vebreathed it, literally.
Lily (31:35):
Literally.
Kim (31:38):
And for that I'm grateful, that's wonderful.
Lily (31:41):
Well, I actually I don't have any other, any other
questions.
Kim (32:10):
So, if you don't have any other further thoughts, would
you mind just have a testimonyof our Heavenly Father's plan,
that it is individual and uniquefor each one of us, yet the
same covenant path takes us backto him, all of us.
I have a testimony that if werely on our Savior, if we do the
little things start where weare, don't expect perfection,
because do the little thingsstart where we are?
Don't expect perfection becausewe won't ever be there in this
life.
Right, and that's okay, right,yeah.
Lily (32:31):
That's okay.
Kim (32:32):
I will never make it in this life, but I can make
progress and I can continue todo that through my Savior, jesus
Christ, and that is mytestimony that he lives, that he
is there for each one of us inour journey, continually.
We'll be there, no matter what.
(32:53):
Whether we reach for him or not, he is still standing by us and
I'm grateful for that, and Isay this in the name of Jesus
Christ, amen.
Lily (33:01):
Amen.
Thank you, Kim, for spendingtime with me today.
Kim (33:03):
Thanks Lily, I really appreciate it, I love you.
Lily (33:05):
I love you too.
Thanks again for tuning in toMore Than Coincidence,
remembering Jesus Christ in yourstory.
Please follow us on socialmedia or share us with a friend.
If you have an experience you'dlike to share, feel free to
reach out tomorethancoincidencerememberhim
at gmailcom.
I can't wait to hear all of theamazing memories you all have
(33:28):
of our Savior.
See you next time.
Hello everyone and welcome to.
More Than Coincidence,remembering Jesus Christ in your
Story.
As the author and finisher ofour faith, our Savior writes
personal experiences into eachof our lives which can later
strengthen, empower and bring uspeace upon reflection.
This podcast is dedicated tosharing these anchoring memories
(00:26):
from everyone's unique storiesin order to collectively
remember and testify of thereality of Jesus Christ and his
presence in our lives.
I'm your host, lily, and I'mvery excited to share these
experiences together.
Welcome everybody to thepodcast tonight.
Today we have Kim.
How are you, kim?
Kim (00:44):
Hi, I'm doing great.
Thank you for having me.
Will you introduce yourself foreverybody, Sure?
So my name is Kim Bulpit.
I have five children and threegrandchildren, a son-in-law and
a daughter-in-law, and I live inLehigh Utah.
Lily (01:02):
Yeah, you're one of the coolest people I know in the
Lord.
Kim (01:06):
Well, you're my spiritual big sister, even though you
could be one of my youngestchildren.
I'm glad.
I'm glad that you're here withme.
Lily (01:14):
No, it's good, we get it.
We get to teach each other.
Yes, absolutely.
I will ask you the question,kim what memories do you have in
your life that you reflect on,that prick your heart and
remembrance of Jesus Christ andanchor you to him?
Kim (01:26):
Oh, there's so many, so many, some of the most recent I
can talk about today becausethey're recent, yeah, and they
prick my heart a lot, uh-huh,because I'm still working on
some of them, right, a lot,because I'm still working on
some of them, right.
Um, my two youngest are twins.
(01:48):
Last July we sent them off,actually end of June, sent them
off on their missions.
I can't believe it's been a year, it has been a year.
Part of me is like, oh, my gosh, it's been a year.
And the other part of me islike, oh, it's only been a year.
Right, yeah, and I would lovefor them to be home, but at the
same time I don't want them tobe anywhere else.
(02:08):
Right?
They cannot learn what they'relearning right now in any other
way, exactly In any othercapacity, in any other short
two-year duration of time.
That spiritual growth is thatpricking themselves in
remembrance of Christ.
This is the best thing they cando.
So I'm glad they're there.
They're good examples to me.
So they left.
(02:29):
I was an empty nester, myhusband and I empty nesters.
And we thought, wow, we're goingto have best time of our life
so much fun.
I was married at 19, had myfirst baby two weeks before my
first anniversary.
So I was, I was a, I was ateenage.
Um, you're a young mom and andmarried and yeah, and all I did
(02:51):
was kids you've been going forforever, going, going, going
yeah.
So I was really looking forwardto this time, thinking, oh my
goodness, I'm, I'm, I'm going to, you know, do so many things
right.
So many, now, many.
Now is the time.
Lily (03:04):
I've earned this.
I definitely have earned this.
Kim (03:07):
Well, we had the opportunity, we sent them off
and then we had the opportunityto go on a beautiful Alaskan
cruise with my sweetmother-in-law and my in-laws and
it was fabulous.
I had a time of my life, it wasbeautiful.
Lily (03:19):
She wails.
We did, we saw all kinds ofthings and glaciers and
beautiful, oh my gosh, theweather, the captain, even said,
the weather has never been thisgood for me.
And it was just, it was likeperfect, it was it was really.
Kim (03:33):
I just was like oh, I can't wait to to bring my kids here.
Lily (03:37):
I want everyone to see this Right.
I've heard Alaskan cruises arereally awesome.
They're gorgeous.
Kim (03:41):
It's just, it's just something else.
Yeah, so we did that, got backand was doing great.
About two days after I umstarted to feel a little sick, I
thought well, maybe I have thisstomach flu.
I'm a little nauseous, I'm alittle dizzy, something's off.
During that whole day, right bythe end of the day, I, I, I
(04:04):
felt like, oh, my goodness,something is really off, I have
to go lay down.
I went and laid down arounddinner time and as soon as I
laid down I realized I was sodizzy and not like spinning
dizzy, like being on asuspension bridge with people
jumping around you.
Oh my gosh, and you're notholding on Right, you're just
(04:27):
going up and down and you'refree falling at the same time.
It was the weirdest, oh my gosh, and it was so it was.
it was so panicky and it made mefeel so sick and out of control
, yeah, and I yelled to myhusband to come in and he came
in and I tried to explain how Iwas feeling and I tried to get
up and I fell to the ground, Icouldn't walk.
(04:49):
I could not walk Not because mymuscles were not strong enough,
well, but the spinning like youcouldn't even keep your balance
.
I could not figure which waywas up and down at the time.
So he took me um to the ER and Iwas diagnosed with something
called malday debarkmentsyndrome.
Mdds, okay, yeah, I've neverheard of it.
(05:10):
It's because it's rare I hadnever heard of it either.
At first I thought is thisvertigo?
Like what, what?
Lily (05:15):
is yeah, or like I just got off a boat and maybe caught
something on the cruise someinner ear or something, I didn't
know.
Kim (05:21):
I just thought oh yeah, this is.
They're gonna give me somemedicine.
I'll see a doctor if they needto, and then we'll be fine.
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
So they did give me somemedicine.
They sent me to an ENT.
They sent me to a chiropractor.
They sent me to a physicaltherapist.
They sent me to I saw aneurologist.
We went all these differentroutes to find out what to do
(05:42):
with this.
It wasn't anything other thanan incorrect neuropathway in my
brain, so I was born with thisgenetic predisposition for this.
But in order for it to come out, this incorrect neuropathway,
you have to have the exact setof circumstances Usually women
(06:03):
around my age, type A,personalities involved in a lot
of things you know, always gotsomething going.
Maybe puts a lot of pressure onthemselves.
And the funnest part of thisall is like, usually in
menopause ding, ding, ding me, Ihave everything.
Lily (06:21):
Just you know just everything, so I found out.
Kim (06:25):
this is really rare, but it has to have the perfect storm,
and I was the perfect storm.
So I thought, well, okay, thisis, this is what it is.
I, I, it was 24, seven, norelief.
Um, it was really hard to get afork to my mouth.
I couldn't brush my hair orbrush my teeth.
You know general, anything thatyou're doing with your body
(06:46):
sitting Sitting, yeah, gettingout of bed anything Anything was
way off and I would fall, so Ineeded a lot of help.
I started some balance training.
I found a really great doctor inColorado who deals with MDDS
specifically and got to startseeing her via thankfully we
(07:07):
have the internet.
Lily (07:08):
Yeah, the telehealth, so we can do telehealth.
Kim (07:11):
Got to do that, because there was no way I was traveling
.
Lily (07:13):
Yeah, no way.
Kim (07:14):
Riding in a car was hard.
Just anything was hard Right.
So I came to find out that thisis something that doesn't have
a cure.
It's something that can be putinto remission, but it can take
some time and there's a lot ofthings I had to do to get it
into remission a lot of things Ihad to give up.
My doctor said you're going tohave to stop working, and I
(07:38):
worked as a computer teacher foran elementary school.
Lily (07:41):
I taught.
Kim (07:42):
K through three.
I saw them all once a week.
They were my school babies.
Lily (07:45):
I called them, my school babies, especially as an empty
nester, you're probably lookingforward to still having like
kids in your life and this wasmy, the beginning of my fifth
year teaching them.
And.
Kim (07:55):
I, just I was in my comfort zone and I was like you know,
the Lord is so good to me I'm anempty nester.
Lily (08:02):
I've got my dream job.
Kim (08:03):
I have time on my hands.
I'm young enough to be able toexperience and do things.
You know, my health is great.
I just I was really excited andthen I had this heavy weight
thrown on me that rocked myworld.
Well, I'm kind of stubborn, youknow type.
Lily (08:25):
A personality, I can do this.
No, I can't relate to that atall, right, so I told my doctors
well, I'm not going to quitwork.
Kim (08:33):
I can do this.
I can do this Right.
So they had to give me tools.
They I wore ankle weightsaround my ankles.
Does that help?
Like just ground you something.
It helped ground me Kind ofinteresting, right?
Yeah, and my focus was whattools do I need to be able to
continue doing what I want to do?
Yeah, my tools were medication,my tools were learning about
(08:59):
balance.
My tools were strengthening mybody and my muscles in ways that
I hadn't been before.
Right, I was literallyrelearning to walk, relearning
to take care of myself.
Yeah, and those were my tools.
That's what I focused on.
I didn't forget about JesusChrist.
I didn't forget about myrelationship with him.
(09:20):
I didn't forget about howimportant he was to me and what
that was.
Lily (09:24):
Yeah.
Kim (09:24):
But my focus was Was elsewhere, elsewhere.
Lily (09:28):
Right.
Kim (09:29):
And so time went on and I wasn't getting healthy very fast
and I was getting frustratedand I remember telling my
husband this is going on forever.
I can't see an end to this.
They said it could take acouple of months.
It could take maybe up to ayear.
You just never know how longit'll take to get it in
remission.
Well, school started.
(09:50):
One of my favorite littlekindergartners noticed that I
was wearing something on myankles and he said Mrs Bullpit,
why are you wearing sausages onyour ankles?
Lily (10:02):
I thought that was about that.
Kim (10:04):
First of all, they are so honest.
They are so honest and and itjust made me giggle and see,
instead of this heaviness thatwas pulling me down during that
day, it made me giggle.
Lily (10:15):
And I thought you're right .
I am wearing sausages on myankle.
Kim (10:20):
The kids were so sweet.
Lily (10:22):
My school was so sweet.
Kim (10:23):
I had parents telling me oh , my child prays for you.
I had other parents telling memy child goes to the temple and
puts your name in the temple.
Yeah, wow.
And I was so touched Right bythem remembering what was
important yeah, remembering themost important things to help me
get through things Right.
(10:43):
And I had glimpses ofremembering that, and then I
would go back to focusing on mytools.
Yeah, tools are good, don't getme wrong.
Yeah, that was like my focus.
Yeah, tools are good, don't getme wrong.
Yeah, yeah, yeah, that was likemy focus, right, right.
So October came.
I had bronchitis for about amonth and a half oh my gosh.
(11:04):
And the doctor had tried, inaddition to you know, all this
MDDS, my world was literallyrocking and I had antibiotics
and steroids and and I usuallyget sick in the winter and I
have a cough for a few months,and so I thought well, this is
what I'm doing again.
It's fine, I just pushedthrough.
I would get winded.
But then I would tell myself,right, oh, just push through,
(11:27):
you're fine.
I want my job, I want my kids.
Lily (11:29):
I don't want to stop.
Kim (11:30):
I'll be fine, it's not contagious, so I'm not hurting
them.
Yeah, because the doctors toldme what I had was not contagious
with my cough and stuff.
Right, it is something that Iturned into something.
Lily (11:40):
So just keep going, it's not hurting anyone, just keep
going.
Kim (11:44):
I need this job.
I want this job.
I like the fulfillment it givesme.
I like the connection with thechildren, with the wonderful
people at my school that workedthere.
I liked the extra money so Icould go travel and see my
grandchildren and do fun things.
I got a lot from it, so Ipushed through.
Lily (12:02):
I think it's almost a way for you to find control in your
life when you literally are outof control physically.
Like it was maybe you even justtrying to find some sense of,
some semblance of normalcy, likeI am not an invalid, like I can
still do these things and evenmaybe proving to yourself like I
can still function.
Kim (12:19):
That's so profound, that is exactly that is exactly what I
had told my, my husband.
This gives me a sense ofpurpose.
This is my normal.
Lily (12:32):
Right.
This makes me feel more normalto be able to go and do this,
because then, when I come home,I have to crash because I'm
exhausted.
Kim (12:40):
I have to sleep.
I have to, whatever that is,but that I could pretend nothing
was wrong, exactly, exactly.
So I pushed through, keptpretending.
One morning I got up to getready for school, realized I was
way off.
So I decided well, I'll justrotate some Tylenol and Advil
today, just see how it goes,I'll just see how I go at school
(13:02):
and the shower.
That morning I almost fellthree times and it wasn't
because of my motion, it was adifferent feeling of falling, it
kind of caught me off guard.
So I thought, well, I'm going tolay down for a minute but I'll
be fine, Called in sick to workgot a sub Right Thought well,
I'll be fine.
Lily (13:20):
Um.
Kim (13:28):
I had this feeling and this thought came into my head.
Something is seriously wrong.
So I thought, well, I'm goingto lay here the next thing I
knew my fingers are literallytouch, texting my husband Like.
I didn't even realize I wasdoing it.
Something is wrong.
Well, he came home and I toldhim I just need to sleep and
I'll probably be fine.
He said I want to take you tothe ER.
Lily (13:40):
Yeah, I would say sleeping is probably not good for
something with a brain problemright, right, me.
Kim (13:46):
Being me was like just give me some time and I'll be fine,
just watch me today.
Just watch me today yeah, well,part way he came in and said no
, you're going to the ER rightnow.
Yeah, within 10 minutes ofbeing in the ER, I was diagnosed
with septic shock.
I had code sepsis.
No, I don't remember most ofthis, I just know what the
doctors told me, and my husbandand my parents ended up coming
(14:09):
over and told me my bronchitishad turned to pneumonia.
yeah, I had passed the levels ofsevere sepsis to septic shock.
Um, my heart had damage.
I had a punctured lung.
My lungs 50 percent weredamaged and black and not.
The doctors thought that thepulmonologist kept asking if I'd
(14:30):
been a smoker my whole life.
No, I've never smoked a day inmy life.
Yeah, I actually feel like I'mallergic to cigarette smoke.
Lily (14:36):
The symptoms I get when I smell it, yeah.
Kim (14:38):
I had.
I had respiratory failure withhypoxia.
It did damage in my brain, itdid damage to my liver.
Lily (14:46):
Yeah, everything, my heart , everything needs oxygen.
Kim (14:49):
Everything, everything.
It took three and a half tofour hours to stabilize me
enough to leave the er room togo up to the icu.
Wow, they didn't know if I wasgonna live or die right.
Um, I spent five days in theicu and didn't realize it was as
serious as it was until theytold me we didn't know if you
were gonna make it or not.
(15:09):
Three days of the icu.
I was on 24 hour watch.
They just didn't know if I wasgoing to make it or not.
Right, and thankfully, by thegrace of God, literally,
literally, I made it.
Yeah, and I went home.
And I remember going home andthinking what am I going to do?
(15:31):
What?
Lily (15:31):
am I going to do?
Kim (15:32):
I had to take time off work at that point.
Yeah, you cannot go back towork.
Lily (15:36):
Yeah, you can't justify that, you're literally coming
back from the dead.
So you need some time.
I was forced into this?
Kim (15:43):
Yeah, forced into this, and so I took the time off work.
Did you feel really?
Lily (15:49):
angry and bitter.
I feel like I'd be kind ofangry, like I thought I had
everything and then everythingcrashes again.
Kim (15:56):
I told my husband what am I supposed to learn from this?
What good has come, I know.
Through our trials we learn andwe grow, and good comes from it
.
I cannot see good right now Ican't see the good.
In fact, it was so hard and Iwas so sick and I had to be, in
oxygen at my house, right, and Ihad to have home health care
and there were times that I saidwhy didn't Heavenly Father just
(16:18):
let me die?
Right, this is too hard.
Everything's been taken awayfrom me.
Yeah, right, I also had memoryissues, right, because I had
loss of oxygen.
Yeah, I'd go into my closet andclothes some of the clothes
were new.
My husband's, like it was thebest best thing for for and it
(16:40):
came from.
This is your closet was like anew shopping experience for you
every day.
I didn't so so and there was.
Lily (16:46):
I thought I have never seen this shirt before.
Kim (16:48):
This is great.
Um, on the flip side, I didn'trecognize some of the people at
my, in my neighborhood or in myward I didn't recognize some of
the drawers in my house.
I didn't recognize some of thebuildings that had been there
for years and it terrified me,right, it was very scary it's
like what important things maybehave I lost?
Lily (17:08):
what have I lost?
What have I lost?
You don't even know.
Kim (17:11):
I didn't know what I didn't know.
In fact, I remember writingdown at know I didn't know what
I didn't know.
In fact, I remember writing downat one time I don't know what I
don't know, and that is morescary than not knowing what I
know.
Right, what I don't know?
Does that make sense?
Yeah, no, totally.
That was more scary to me.
Also, I learned about my brain.
It was like no, since I hadrespiratory failure with hypoxia
(17:34):
.
I learned that my brain waslike a wedge of Swiss cheese.
You cut a slice and every dayyou don't know which holes are
going to be where and how bigthey're going to be.
So sometimes I remembered somethings and sometimes I didn't.
Lily (17:46):
Yeah.
Kim (17:46):
That was very scary to me.
Lily (17:48):
Yeah.
Kim (17:48):
And frustrating Right frustrating right, I had days I
remember, about two months outafter being home from the
hospital, that I didn'tunderstand why I was sick and
why I was feeling the way I wasfeeling and what was going on.
And my husband said well, youwere in the ICU.
Yeah, I had to explaineverything again.
You had septic shock.
(18:10):
You almost died.
You've had some damage to yourvital organs and your brain
Right and I looked at him and Isaid why haven't?
Lily (18:22):
you told me and I was so mad, I feel so like to, you just
need like all the sticky noteseverywhere.
Kim (18:25):
That's when we realized that I needed a journal.
I needed to journal what I knewand what I had learned and I
started every day, what I knew,what I'd learned, what I was
grateful for, so that I couldsee in my own handwriting the
tender mercies from my heavenlyfather.
I could see Jesus Christhelping me along the way.
(18:47):
I had to write it down and eventhough my physical body and
brain could not remember, Icould see in my own handwriting
what was going on and how I wasimproving.
And the good Right, Because myfocus for so long had been what
are my tools?
What do I have to do to gethealthy?
What am?
Lily (19:06):
I forgetting.
Kim (19:07):
What am I?
And it was.
That was a constant state ofanxiety and like panic yeah, I
can't.
And panic and relying on thethings of man, right, right,
which in reality we still haveto do that.
We have to rely on the thingshere that are good for us, that
do help us, right, right.
But my general focus, my firstand foremost focus, had slipped
(19:31):
away from Jesus Christ.
Right and his role in helpingme through this and his role of
touching my heart and helping merealize the blessings, right,
and the tender mercies and thelittle miracles and the little
gains.
Yeah, without that Right I washeaded down in my progress.
(19:53):
Exactly, right, it's through himthat I can progress with these
other things Right, these othertools that I was given Right,
and I realized that I had reallygotten away from that.
Lily (20:07):
Yeah, so do you feel like you just really had to change
your perspective?
It's your perspective and yourparadigm shift exactly to help,
absolutely.
Kim (20:18):
I had been given so many blessings during this time.
I had faith in blessings.
I had been listening.
I didn't stop listening.
I mean, obviously there was alot of time I couldn't go to
church.
I didn't stop studying, though Ididn't stop listening and
trying to learn, right, but myfocus was so focused on healing
and getting my body healthy,which is good, right, but I had
(20:41):
to shift it through what meanswhat was the first and foremost
important meaning Instead ofbeing.
This is so hard every day.
I don't see the good in this.
Lily (20:50):
Yeah.
Kim (20:51):
I had to choose Jesus Right .
Don't see the good in this.
Yeah, I had to choose JesusRight.
I had to choose where he wasand how he was helping me every
single day, whether or not, hewould heal you.
Lily (21:01):
That's right.
Because I feel like, yeah, ifit were me, I'd be praying like
okay, you're supposed to be themaster healer, like when
something going to happen, right, yeah, or even just you know,
pray that I can find anotherdoctor that this medication
would.
Yeah, the thy will be done.
Portion.
Kim (21:22):
That we kind of.
I think that is the difference,thy will, I am following your
hand in my life Right Throughthis journey yeah, even though
it is not the journey I wouldhave chosen for myself, yeah,
yeah, yeah.
Like it usually isn't Right, butapparently he knows what's best
(21:44):
for me.
He knows what kim bull pitneeds to go through in this life
to become my best self in orderto be able to return and live
with him.
100.
I have faith and trust and Iknow that, right, I know that.
I know that through thehardships, right.
I remember my boys on a mission.
At this time I didn't know whatthey knew, or didn't know Cause
(22:05):
I had a lot of memory loss.
Lily (22:07):
Yeah, panicking that their mom was dying.
Kim (22:09):
Yeah Right, my, my kids and my husband kept them updated
the best they can without alsoworrying them too much.
Tried to give them, feed thempositives.
Yeah, but they were such asweet, tender, tender, miracle
mercies in my life to be able to.
We can now um video call themand talk video call them every
(22:31):
single week, yeah, and at firstI remember being a little like
oh my gosh, I have differentdays with each boy.
I want them on the same day.
I want to see their faces onthe same day.
Lily (22:38):
How come?
Kim (22:39):
I can't have the same p-day when I can video and I can see
them together.
Lily (22:43):
But now with your memory loss.
You wouldn't remember if whichday was.
Kim (22:47):
I don't remember who I've talked to what or when.
Anyway, right, but I came tofind that the blessing in that
different day yeah was was atender mercy so I got forward to
.
I got more things to lookforward to during my week.
Yeah, you know, I got more daysto experience it.
That was wonderful.
I remember my son Trevor oneday, knowing some of the things
(23:10):
I'd gone through and I wasfeeling frustrated at that point
.
Yeah, I might not be able to goback to work.
I had started back to work.
I had cut it down to very twodays a week.
Lily (23:19):
Yeah, and I had to have help?
Kim (23:20):
Yeah, and I had to have help, yeah, and I had to do the
minimum Right, but I was stillpushing and I remember feeling
so frustrated, like my healthhad only gotten better to a
certain point.
Right, and my son, trevor, saidhe had listened to a talk by
someone and I wish I could getcredit where credit is due.
Uh-huh, I can't remember who itwas, but it talked about are
(23:40):
you willing to give up what youwant most, what you love most,
for the God you love more?
Right, and that just hit melike a ton of bricks.
Yeah, wow.
Am I willing to give up pushingmy agenda?
Well, this job makes me happy.
This job is fulfilling to methis job.
I'm doing good things here thisis good.
(24:02):
Right of failing to the thisjob.
I'm doing good things here.
This is right, right for,ultimately, jesus christ, who
knows me intimately, right andis willing to help me along the
path that my heavenly fatherwants me to go on.
Am I willing to give that upfor those, jesus christ and my
and my heavenly father that Ilove more yeah, and it just to
(24:25):
the very core, hit me, wow, hitme Well.
Miracle number two that sameweek my other son had not talked
to Trevor, my other missionaryson, nathan they had not
conversed didn't know I wasgoing through this.
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
And Nathan said I have athought I want to share with you
(24:45):
, mom.
And he brought up that veryexact talk about giving up what
we want most and what we lovemost for the God who loves us
and who we love more, and sothat was my sign yes, quit my
job.
Quit my job, quit my job.
Change paths and let JesusChrist be the lens that I look
(25:09):
through right to help me heal,to help me do whatever my
journey is.
Yeah, in this life, to learnwhatever I need to through him.
I wasn't doing bad thingsbefore, right, but obviously
such an abrupt stop for me wasnot the path I was supposed.
Lily (25:28):
It was an abrupt turnaround yeah, I can't even
imagine how hard that would havebeen.
I would have been like, okay,one day a week, we'll just we'll
slowly ease out of this, andthat's what I did for a while
even after coming back from thedead.
I still decided I was going to,just you know a little bit here
and there, yeah, but giving itall up, as hard as that is as
(25:50):
hard as that was because I lovedit.
Kim (25:52):
I finally found like my purpose I felt like in life
Right Is to be with thesechildren and be able to teach
them about internet safety?
Lily (26:04):
Yeah, and important skills be able to teach them.
Kim (26:06):
We can't we can't necessarily talk about Jesus
Christ in school, but I talk tothem about their inner Jiminy
Cricket all the time you haveone you have an inner Jiminy
Cricket it is leading you.
Lily (26:16):
You listen to that right.
You know we couldn't talk aboutthose things.
Kim (26:19):
But I right, but I told them that because I felt it was
so important, so I thought I'mgiving up something so good.
Lily (26:25):
Yeah.
But, with for what, like youdon't even know Right now, I
don't know.
Kim (26:30):
Yeah, I still don't exactly know.
I have little ideas, littlethings.
Um, my dad has Parkinson's.
I was going to say, with allthe family stuff going on, and
now he has dementia parkinson's.
I was gonna say, with all thefamily stuff going on and now he
has dementia.
Yeah, and my dad type apersonality.
He was a bishop, he was a statepresident, he was a mission
president, he was a templepresident, he ran his own
(26:52):
company, he built it, he sold it, whoa, he, he, my dad, knew and
could do, in my opinion,everything, yeah, right and
clear, even up until he was 74.
I mean, he had some Parkinson'sduring that time, right, but he
was still going, but he wasstill my goodness, I wonder
where you get it from.
(27:14):
The apple doesn't feel far fromthe tree, fall far from the tree
.
But, um, watching him changethis past little while, yeah,
and losing some of himself indementia, right, and seeing him
struggle with Parkinson's andwatching his brain be confused
and forget and be scared, yeah.
Some of the things that I wentthrough during this with my
(27:36):
balance issues.
Lily (27:37):
Yeah.
Kim (27:38):
You know the falling.
We would laugh.
He was my shaky buddy, We'dfall together.
Lily (27:42):
It was fine.
Kim (27:43):
We, we had comfort in each other because we knew how each
other kind of felt.
Right, right.
Yes, and then my brain, theforgetting, the anxiety, the
depression that came with it.
Right, the scariness, theconfusion.
Right the crying and seeing himdo that at times.
Lily (28:00):
Right we were buddies, the mourning what you were morning.
Kim (28:04):
The loss yeah, like you have to go through that grieving
process.
I kind of feel like everythingthis past year and it's been
over just over a year since thisall has happened yeah, it's
helped me in some small wayconnect on a level with my dad
that no one else in my familycan they want to.
(28:25):
They're there for him, theylove him, they empathize with
him, they see the struggle andthey're so good to him.
But there's something about whatI went through, that we can sit
and talk and I can maybe helpexplain a little bit what he's
feeling when he can't get thewords Right Exactly and my dad
(28:49):
is my hero.
Yeah, if I can help be hiswords when he can't find them,
this is worth it.
If that's the only thing I'msupposed to learn.
Yeah, through quittingeverything and relying on Jesus
and having Jesus Christ prick myheart so much, in so many
different ways, yeah, helping mydad and being able to be his
(29:12):
words and sit with him in themud when it's ugly, yeah, then
it's all worth it.
Lily (29:19):
yeah which is crazy because, if you think about it,
it's going back to the one ofhow christ ministers, to the one
oh yeah and you're getting tohave that opportunity of
ministering to the one in thatrespect as well in a totally
unique way that only the saviorcould offer fully and completely
.
But you can even get a tinyglimpse of what even that could
(29:42):
be like, and that's reallyspecial.
Kim (29:45):
Absolutely.
It's so small, it's such asmall thing to be able to do,
but such a powerful, huge,life-changing, wonderful
experience for me and I'mstarting to see.
No, I don't understand why Iwent through everything I went
(30:06):
through or why it still plaguesme a little bit yeah yeah, but I
have such great faith in thepath that I need to follow, in
Jesus Christ being my lens thatI see through in order to do
(30:28):
everything else, and him beingmy anchor and him being yoked
with him, needing Jesus morethan I need air.
And I'm telling you when you'rein the hospital and you can't
breathe Right.
Lily (30:41):
Kind of puts a new perspective on things.
It's a big perspective.
Kim (30:44):
I had to struggle to breathe for so long, but guess
what?
Lily (30:47):
Yeah.
Kim (30:48):
There's so many things in my life that I have needed to
struggle and need Jesus morethan I need air, and when I'm
able to do that and I'm notperfect at this I am learning,
yeah, and I'm thankful I'mlearning, and I hope to always
continue to learn because I needit Right.
But when I reach out for himmore than I need air to breathe,
things are okay.
(31:09):
Yeah, might not be better or thebest, it's not easy, yeah, but
there's hope and there's healing, and there's peace and there's
happiness, yeah, and there'scalm in Jesus Christ.
I know that to be true withevery fiber of my being.
I can't deny it.
(31:30):
I've seen it, I felt it, I'vebreathed it, literally.
Lily (31:35):
Literally.
Kim (31:38):
And for that I'm grateful, that's wonderful.
Lily (31:41):
Well, I actually I don't have any other, any other
questions.
Kim (32:10):
So, if you don't have any other further thoughts, would
you mind just have a testimonyof our Heavenly Father's plan,
that it is individual and uniquefor each one of us, yet the
same covenant path takes us backto him, all of us.
I have a testimony that if werely on our Savior, if we do the
little things start where weare, don't expect perfection,
because do the little thingsstart where we are?
Don't expect perfection becausewe won't ever be there in this
life.
Right, and that's okay, right,yeah.
Lily (32:31):
That's okay.
Kim (32:32):
I will never make it in this life, but I can make
progress and I can continue todo that through my Savior, jesus
Christ, and that is mytestimony that he lives, that he
is there for each one of us inour journey, continually.
We'll be there, no matter what.
(32:53):
Whether we reach for him or not, he is still standing by us and
I'm grateful for that, and Isay this in the name of Jesus
Christ, amen.
Lily (33:01):
Amen.
Thank you, Kim, for spendingtime with me today.
Kim (33:03):
Thanks Lily, I really appreciate it, I love you.
Lily (33:05):
I love you too.
Thanks again for tuning in toMore Than Coincidence,
remembering Jesus Christ in yourstory.
Please follow us on socialmedia or share us with a friend.
If you have an experience you'dlike to share, feel free to
reach out tomorethancoincidencerememberhim
at gmailcom.
I can't wait to hear all of theamazing memories you all have
(33:28):
of our Savior.
See you next time.
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