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April 7, 2024 19 mins

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Embark on a voyage of faith and fortitude as Coach Joe DuPaix opens up about the spiritual playbook that has guided him through a labyrinth of life's toughest challenges. From the sting of career setbacks at BYU to the task of supporting a family, Joe's narrative is a compelling saga of perseverance, interwoven with the comforting embrace of his faith in Jesus Christ. His candid reflections serve as a beacon for anyone struggling to find their footing amidst the chaos of life's trials and tribulations.

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Episode Transcript

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Lily (00:06):
Hello everyone and welcome to.
More Than Coincidence,remembering Jesus Christ in your
As the author and finisher ofour faith, our Savior writes
personal experiences into eachof our lives which can later
strengthen, empower and bring uspeace upon reflection.
This podcast is dedicated tosharing these anchoring memories

from everyone's unique storiesin order to collectively
remember and testify of thereality of Jesus Christ and His
presence in our lives.
I'm your host, lily, and I'mvery excited to share these
experiences together.
Okay, so today on the podcastwe have Joe Dupay, or, as we
like to call him in our house,coach Dupay.

How you doing, coach?

Joe DuPaix (00:50):
I'm doing really, really good.
How about you?

Lily (00:52):
Will you introduce yourself alittle bit for everybody?

Joe DuPaix (00:56):
Oh man, sure.
So I grew up in Salt Lake City,utah, and I kind of wanted to.
I love the game of footballObviously I'm still coaching,
but I want to play for my dadway back in the day.
So I grew up in Sandytechnically, and as I got to
high school I was able to playfor my dad and have that

experience of winning a bunch ofgames with him.
And then I got into college andplayed quarterback down at Snow
College and then went down toSouthern Utah, played at
Southern Utah.
When I got done there, my wifeand I we met my sophomore year
in college, got married rightbetween my sophomore and junior
year, and when I graduated fromSouthern Utah we got right into

the college coaching thing.
Our first job was out inMissouri and at that time we had
one little baby and Monicawanted to get back closer to her
family and to Utah.
So we moved from Missouri backto Utah.
I took a job at Riverton HighSchool and taught there for one
and a half years and that'swhere we had our second child.

And from there I had anopportunity to go out to
California and coach at Cal Polyin San Luis Obispo, california,
and while I was there as theoffense coordinator and the
quarterback coach but, moreimportantly, we had three more
little babies.
So our young family of fivekids.

We really enjoyed our time inSan Luis Obispo, just hanging
out, going to the beach,barbecuing a lot of hot dogs
back in the day.

Lily (02:32):
Oh yeah, it's beautiful down there.

Joe DuPaix (02:34):
It is awesome.
It is awesome and we won abunch of games and so life was
And after that we went to Navyand I had the opportunity to
work with Kenyumatololo, who'sone of the finest head football
coaches in the world.
We had another little one there, Cooper and then from there we

went to BYU there's a BYU for alittle bit, and we had Kennedy
while we were at BYU.
And then we ended up coming toVirginia, so as the head coach
here at Southern Virginia, whenI had the opportunity to work
with you and your husband in2016 and 17.
And that's when we rounded outour eighth child and six boys,

two girls, many, many moves andit's been quite the adventure.
But we got done at SouthernVirginia while we were there for
two years and then I went backto Navy.
I was there for another fiveyears and just had some great
opportunities to spend time withCoach Nyumatololo and the gang,

and then came back here toSouthern Virginia a year ago.
So back as a head coach now forone year, and it's been really,
really awesome.
As far as the ride is concernedA lot of ups, a lot of downs, a
lot of great experiences, Notthe routine every day, living in

one house my entire life.
Not saying that's wrong by anymeans, but just different
We all have challenges andsometimes Monica and I joke
We've been married 28 years now.
We were sealed in Salt LakeCity Temple but 28 years later
we kind of joke about why do wealways choose such hard things

to do?
And that's just kind of beenour ammo over the years.
Without her incredible exampleand strength there's no way that
we'd be where we are today.
But it's been really, reallycool.

Lily (04:39):
I love Monica.
She was so amazing to work with.
She's awesome, that's so fun.
And I think, on the topic ofresilience and relationships and
all these blessings from God,what memories have you had that
the Lord's put into your life,that prick your heart and
remembrance of Him?

Joe DuPaix (04:57):
Oh man, so many experiences and it really comes
down to my relationship with mySavior, jesus Christ, and just
what the gospel has done for us.
It seems like a lot of times.
There's been a lot of highsthroughout our life where things

are going great, but there'salso been some lows.
Right, and as a BYU.
I loved my time at BYU, beingclose to family, worked for a
great man, bronco Mendenhall,who I still consider a mentor
today, even though, after beingthere a little bit, we were let
Bronco hired a new offensivecoordinator and that particular

offensive coordinator brought inhis own people and I wasn't one
of those guys.
And that's the way footballworks.
And so I remember, while Monicaand I were just trying to figure
out life and we were living inpleasant grove at the time and
just trying to figure out, whatare we going to do at this time?
We have seven kids and they'reall young.

Madeline was in high school andwe're just trying to go through
How in the world are we goingto do this?
What are we going to do?
Right, take care of our family,pay all the bills, et cetera.
And there was a day where I wasa little bit in the dumps right
I was in a little bit, I wasjust like gosh dang, you know,
and Monica's like you know whatyeah.

Like you know what, let's go getsome lunch and we can just talk
about plans.
And so I jumped in the car anddrove down to Costa Vita in
pleasant grove, and I went tograb the key out of the console
and it wasn't there and it wasjust a little key fob right
About the size of my AirPodscase.

And the fob wasn't sittingthere.
And I said, monica, do you havea key by chance?
I'm checking all my pockets andI can't find the key anyplace.
And I'm like it's reallybizarre, because you can't drive
the car without the fob, thekey, yeah, yeah, you start up,
but then it's not going to drive.
And so I got out of the car.
I was like, well, let's just goeat.
Obviously it's got to be inhere somewhere.

So I get out of the car and Iwalk behind the car to go up in
Monica's door and as I'm walkingbehind the car, that little key
fob is sitting on the backbumper of the vehicle.

Lily (07:20):
No way.

Joe DuPaix (07:21):
Now number one.
I don't remember ever puttingit there.
I have no idea how it ended upthere, let alone how it stayed
on the bumper while we droveover gutters and through

Lily (07:34):

Joe DuPaix (07:35):
You know, we weren't on the freeway but we were
doing maybe 50 miles an hour atcertain points of the drive and
here's that little key fob stillsitting on the back of the
bumper and I saw that it wasjust like a slap in the face.
All right, I got it, you got me.
You know you we're gonna beokay.
This is a you know, it's alittle one of those tender

mercies where you know whatwe're gonna be okay and I don't
know what's gonna happen.
I don't know where the money'sgonna come from, I don't know
how we're gonna feed our kids,but I know that heavenly father
Things looking out for us andthe details that he does that
with her through the roofimpressive.
But Right that was a moment forme where I was like, okay, let's

go, you know, and and of course, monica, I laughed about it as
we ate lunch and and things haveworked out right, you know.
Yeah, when you look back intime and connect the dots,
things always happen for areason, and Usually when you
look forward and try to plan outyour life, nothing seems to

work the way that you expectedto and you can't paint that
picture or plan it all out.

Lily (08:44):

Joe DuPaix (08:46):
It's just interesting the way that it
works, and just anothertestament to our savior that
He'd be very involved.

Lily (08:55):
That's so cool.
How do you feel like you'veseen the Lord in your life as as
an athlete and as a coach?
Because I feel like that's areally unique experience to be
able to have this reallyinteresting connection with the
physical and the spiritual andthe mental when it all comes
And so how do you feel likeyou've seen the Lord in not only

your athletics but also in theathletics of your children and
as a coach, like, where do youfeel like God is in that?

Joe DuPaix (09:24):
Yeah, well, I truly believe that God is very
involved in in my lifepersonally as an athlete.
You know I would pray.
I still remember I pray.
You know that I would go outand perform at the very highest
level that I could performAthletically and mentally and
and just have that skill set tobe able to do everything that I
really needed to do for thesuccess of our football team.

And I know that God cares, hecares about me.
Now I can't tell you that hecares whether we win or not,
necessarily because there's alot of good people on the field
at one time, but, yep, but when,when, when Helen father is
caring about me, I know withoutquestion that I'm going to be
able to go out and perform at myhighest level.

So, as a player, that's how Ifelt and I truly felt like I was
very blessed in my playing days, not only with good health but
a lot of success and Successfulteammates, success on the game
filled just overall.
But yeah, as you know, watchingour kids kind of grow up and go

through that process, it's beenfun to try and teach them some
of those lessons and and seethem actually take it serious
and and some more than others,but there's no question that God
isn't in the details.
He cares about us.
And and then, of course, as acoach, here's Southern Virginia,
you know, one of the reasonswhy I really want wanted to come

back here was to be the headcoach and be able to help give
direction to not just 12 peoplein my position room, but 200
plus people, to the whole team.
And we talked about increasingspirituality Within our players
and we talked about prayer andwe talked about Christ.
We talked about things thatreally matter.

We're not solely trying todevelop them on the football
field, but we're also tryingtrying to develop them
spiritually so they can becomethe best fathers and husbands.
Down the road, and and withoutGod, that's really really,
really, really hard, and evenwith God, there's a lot of

Lily (11:30):

Joe DuPaix (11:31):
But through faith and belief, we know he'll have a
have us and make sure that weare blessed and taken care of.
But right, but we definitelytalked about that quite a bit
and I thought it was pretty cool, you know.
Just, you know there's beensome Christian athletes that
have kind of stepped up recently, you know, and made comments,
whether beyond social media andwhatnot, about about how their

faith in Christ yeah, he has animpact on their life and I love
seeing that because it's realright and it just has brought me
tremendous peace, knowing thatwhen I have Christ in my life,
I'm going to be okay and I'm notso stressed about the outcome.

Now I want to and I expect towin, but I know that things are
going to work out because I'mtrying to do my best for him and
to live my life so that he canhave the ultimate success right
as we strive to build Zion.
So that's just a little bitabout my history with those


Lily (12:35):
That's awesome.
Well, I just love how you bringup this line of just kind of
letting him have it, letting himtake it, and, knowing you and
knowing your family, you guys dogive 200% all the time right
and every day, I thinkeverywhere all over the world,
people are trying to give theirbest, and it's so nice to know

or at least try and get ourminds in the perspective that we
can give our best, and thenhe'll magnify whatever we have.
And sometimes that is thehardest thing.
Especially as an A-typepersonality, I'm always like
I've got to do everything I can,I've got to be perfect, I've
got to get it all done right,and so when things fall short,
it hurts, and I've really had tolearn to say oh, he's got me,

the key fob was there.
I've had to have those momentsin my life too.
So I think that's really cool,that that's what you're touching
on, that we can give all and weneed to give our all, but at
the end of the day, it's him.

Joe DuPaix (13:33):
It is, it is and he's going to give that much
And I will say this that when Ihad the opportunity to work
with you, I don't think any ofmy organization of files and
equipment and things that youhave within the football program
have ever been at that samehigh level.

Lily (13:51):
So don't sell yourself short.

Joe DuPaix (13:53):
You're super organized and super on point and
I used to enjoy just sittingback and you'd walk in the
office on occasion and tell oneof the coaches listen.
Now you can't put that here.
It's got to go there orwhatever, and I was like we're
in good hands here.
So I appreciate that I tried,so you did a great job, but even

at that, like you said, westrive to do our best.
Whatever our best is is what weneed to do, and Christ will
take it above and beyond.

Lily (14:25):

Joe DuPaix (14:25):
I know that to be true and if I didn't, man, I
can't even imagine in today'sworld how I could live a life
full of joy.
Every day I wake up and I'mhappy, Right Life.
That doesn't mean it's perfect,but I'm happy, and with
everything all that turmoiltoday.

If I didn't have Jesus Christin my life, I'm not sure that
that would be the case.
It would be so much harder tojust go on your day to day

Lily (14:57):
Well, because I think havingthe gospel of Jesus Christ and
knowing the plan of salvation itgives you I don't want to say
like an end goal, but it doesgive you something to hope for
and to look at, rather thanwaking up every day and doing
the daily grind and wondering,like, what is this for?
Like, of course you love yourfamily and of course you do
things for your family, you dothings for those that you love.
But I think, at the end of theday, knowing that there is more,

that it's like I'm doing thisfor my family for long term,
like not just this life, but forthe future too, like eternal
future, I know, I think thatbrings me a lot of peace too.

Joe DuPaix (15:32):
So yeah, I totally agree, 100% Awesome.

Lily (15:37):
Well, are there any other memories that you would like to
share before you leave us withthe testimony?

Joe DuPaix (15:43):
You know, just just overall life in general.
You know, I know that life ishard.
I'm privileged to sit down withplayers daily and hear their
struggles, hear their stories.
Back when I was a player, Imean I couldn't call homeless, I

had to pay phone or I wrote aletter nowadays.
You know, these young men andathletes across the world still
have one foot back home becauseof social media, and one foot
wherever they're going to school, and what that leads to is some
And so I hear about thosechallenges where I had a young

man today text me and say hey,you know I'm doing all right,
coach, can I come by and talk toyou?
My family's going through thisreally hard thing and yada, yada
, yada and sharing details abouthis life.
And so the players that I havethe opportunity to coach and
work with right now are reallygoing through some challenges in
life, and a lot of times as wediscuss those those challenges,

it kind of comes back to whereJesus Christ is in their life.
And so I love the fact that Ican be where I am right now,
where, hopefully, I'm addingvalue to their lives, not
because of me, joe Dupais, butbecause of my relationship with
God, because of my testimony ofJesus Christ, and I think that

there's a lot of good that'sthat's being done there.
But I also know there's a lotmore that can be done, and I
just know, you know, I'll justtell you that I know that Christ
is real, that he loves me.
He loves each of us.
You know I alluded to itearlier I don't know how I would
be if I didn't have JesusChrist in my corner, but the

fact that I do, the fact that Iam playing for his team and that
I know with certainty that hehas my back, allows me to truly
wake up with joy in my hearteach and every day, and that is
something that I'm so gratefulfor, definitely super grateful
for the church of Jesus Christ,the Latter Day Saints, and all

the lessons that are garneredthrough that knowledge that
we're able to learn each andevery day.
I just know that my life isbetter and will continue to be
better the more I truly invest,with intention, my efforts to be
better at those things.

Lily (18:22):
Right, that's awesome.
Well, I really appreciate allyour thoughts and just it's been
great catching up with you andI hope that this next football
season goes great.
Spring ball is coming up, soyou've got a lot of work you got
to get done.

Joe DuPaix (18:37):
Spring ball is coming up and our season is just
around the corner and you'reright, we have a ton to do.
There's so much we need to dojust from an development
standpoint, but that's why we'rehere and we have players who
are super excited about it.
So we'll anticipate and expectyour prayers, lily.

Lily (18:54):
So thank you and you keep up the great work.
Well, you got our prayers andyou got my thanks for coming on
I really appreciate it.

Joe DuPaix (19:01):
Awesome, you bet, thank you.

Lily (19:05):
Thanks again for tuning into more than coincidence,
remembering Jesus Christ in yourstory.
Please follow us on socialmedia or share us with a friend.
If you have an experience you'dlike to share, feel free to
reach out to more thancoincidencerememberhimatgmailcom
I can't wait to hear all of theamazing memories you all have
of our Savior.

See you next time.
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