April 5, 2025 • 41 mins
What if the boldest move you could make was believing you’re already enough?
In this powerful episode, Chantée Christian sits down with Randi B.—truth-teller, speaker, and unapologetic rogue in the DEI space—to explore the revolutionary act of radical self-worth. After 24 years in change management, Randi walked away from corporate conformity and created Truthing, a platform rooted in authenticity over approval.
Together, they unpack the emotional toll of being Black women in traditional workplaces, the hard-earned freedom of entrepreneurship, and the uncomfortable truth about why so many of us struggle to celebrate ourselves. From pricing your services to loving yourself out loud, this conversation is a mirror and a permission slip.
Randi doesn’t hold back—and neither should you.
Connect with Randi B via YouTube | Instagram
Listen now and start shifting your perspective!
Tag us & share your biggest takeaway using #MyBestShiftPodcast.
________________________
SUPPORT US BY SUPPORTING OUR PARTNER(S)
Buzzsprout – Following this link let's Buzzsprout know we sent you, gets you a $20 Amazon gift card if you sign up for a paid plan, and helps support our show https://www.buzzsprout.com/?referrer_id=1381600.
Headliner – Following this link let’s Headliner know we sent you https://make.headliner.app/referral/info_AwIgqs.
________________________
THE DREAM TEAM -- CREDITS
Audio Engineering: Superb Media (kevinwatkins.nyc@gmail.com)
Music Composition: Hitz Muzic Group, LLC (hitzmuzicgroup@gmail.com)
Photography: Peculiar Images by R.J. Paulk (rj@peculiarimages.us)
Hair: Rob Fooks Hair Salon (rob@robfooks.com)
Custom Artwork: Janae Danielle Consulting and Design (janaedanielleco@gmail.com)
Get your copy of "Awareness Put Me On" Today!
Follow us @MyBestShift_LLC on Instagram.
Mark as Played
Transcript
Episode Transcript
Available transcripts are automatically generated. Complete accuracy is not guaranteed.
Chantée Christian (00:03):
Welcome to the My Best Shift podcast.
I'm your host, ChantéeChristian.
In today's episode, I'll betalking about embracing
self-worth and the power ofauthenticity with Randi B.
Hi Randi, how you doing today.
Randi B. (00:19):
I am doing pretty well .
Thank you for having me, lady.
Good to talk to you.
Chantée Christian (00:24):
Yes, it's so good to see you.
So before we get too deep intoour conversation today, why
don't you tell the people alittle bit about yourself?
Randi B. (00:33):
That's always a tough question.
It's why it's so hard to talkabout ourselves, right Always.
Chantée Christian (00:38):
It's the one question that always stops
people.
Randi B. (00:40):
Right, my name is Randi B.
, or Randi Bryant.
I am a former DEI person,diversity, equity and inclusion
person.
I have owned a changemanagement company for 24 years.
Recently I have gone rogue andhave spent more time just
(01:01):
talking directly and candidlyabout issues that before I used
to tiptoe around because Ididn't want to offend people or
you know, the truth is hard.
So the center of my platform iscalled Truthy.
I'm all about truth and tellingyour truth, living your truth,
listening to the truth of others.
I believe that's the only waywe make change.
(01:21):
That's me, I mean.
I don't know what else to say.
I'm a Sagittarius.
I like traveling.
Chantée Christian (01:30):
It feels like a dating profile.
Randi B. (01:34):
I'm 5'7, with brown eyes.
Chantée Christian (01:41):
So I met you at an event where you were
talking about what it lookedlike and what it felt like to
own a business as a Black womanand be a change agent.
There's so much of this lifethat we have been living and so
much literal change that ishappening, what feels like every
day, and I'm curious like howdo you sustain?
Randi B. (02:08):
Wine.
Oh no, I'm sorry, oh sorry,you're looking for both of that.
I believe that the typicalworkforce has made it difficult,
particularly for Black women,to function and also be happy
not to, like DMX say.
You know y'all gonna make melose my mind up in here.
(02:34):
I think it's literally almost ahostile place for us to be most
places, and so we have decidedto create spaces of our own, and
once you feel the level ofpeace that comes with that and
by peace that doesn't meanyou're not working ungodly hours
, you are not crying, staying upall night, wondering how you're
going to pay bills, like all ofthat exists.
(02:55):
I don't want to glamorize beingan entrepreneur, but just the
peace of not having to deal withthe microaggressions piece of
not having to deal with themicroaggressions, the
macroaggressions, just thefeeling that if you work your
butt off, if you work hardenough, you can actually
accomplish some things, whereasI believe that we became
discouraged in typicalworkplaces where we felt as if,
(03:18):
regardless of how hard we worked, we could not get to where we
deserve to be, and so I managedit.
One just the fear of having togo back to a traditional place.
So fear of that helps Walkingin my purpose.
I'm absolutely doing what Ifeel that I should be doing,
even though sometimes I don'twant to do it because it's
(03:39):
difficult and challenging.
And sometimes I'm asking youknow, god and I have some frank
conversations, so I'm like, okay, let's talk about this again.
So what you're saying is, thisis what I'm supposed to be doing
, like I'm getting this feeling,but you're not making it easy
for me.
I thought if I did what I wasso called to do, then it would
be easy.
And no, that's not it.
Chantée Christian (04:00):
My God, if I had a white towel.
Oh my God, my God, if I had awhite towel, I'd throw it at you
.
Randi B. (04:07):
Sorry, go ahead Surrounding yourself with the
right people.
You will lose people along yourjourney.
Yeah, having people thatsupport you.
You know there's always memesthat talk about those people
that say, oh, your little job,your little company, you're
trying to do your little hobbyand put you down.
You know they don't validatewhat you're doing and you need
validation because it is scary.
(04:28):
It's scary to be out here byyourself and being judged on
things Protecting yourself.
Because I am so public Mostpeople who have a job in their
business you're going to bepublic, even if it's just on
Yelp or something.
People are unhappy.
So sometimes people there'sjust on Yelp or something.
People are unhappy, sosometimes people there's no day.
(04:49):
I don't get nasty things to me.
I mean there is no day and soyou have to.
I'm not necessarily sayingbuild up a tough skin.
I'm saying block people, useyour resources.
Chantée Christian (04:59):
Yeah, absolutely.
I love that and I think thatit's important to really talk
about the debunking ofglamorizing entrepreneurship.
So it's coming up on four yearssince I left corporate and
became a solopreneur and Ithought it was this very rosy,
(05:22):
beautiful experience because ofall the things that I've seen
and that I heard about it.
And when I got in it I was like, well, where are the people who
gonna do it Me?
You know, like who are thesepeople?
And I think that it's also Iremember for Awareness, put Me
(05:45):
On.
We had a call and one of theauthors said you know, well,
it's just a little project.
And I saw red because I waslike there's nothing little
about this and if you're goingto surround yourself with people
who say that to you, then youneed to take a deeper look
within yourself to find out whythat's resonating with you.
(06:07):
Why aren't you upset about?
Randi B. (06:11):
it.
Yes, that has been arealization I've actually had
this past year.
I was my own worst advocate,yeah, and I didn't take myself
seriously as I should, and sowhy should I have expected
others to take me seriously?
(06:32):
I was doing the work, for sure,but I still did not respect
myself.
One of my friends did a retreata Pilates retreat 17 black women
at Maraval Resort, and I wasonly one of those black women
who did one of those in the airobstacle courses that are insane
(06:53):
.
Of course you did, I did, andthey show you the equipment
because they want you to trustthe equipment.
They say do you trust theequipment?
Do you trust that We'vedesigned this to keep you safe?
Then there's a woman who standson the ground who manages the
ropes and before they allow youto start climbing, you have to
answer the question that sheasked you do you trust me?
And I said yes, and so then Istarted climbing up the obstacle
(07:16):
course and I felt I was goingto die and I'm not scared of
heights, but I was terrified.
I finally get to the top beforeI've done any of the moving
across, and there's one of theiremployees up there and I said I
don't know what y'all do inthese situations, but you're
going to have to get ahelicopter to get my black ass
down because I'm not doing this,I'm not going down, I'm not
(07:39):
going through, I'm not goingaround.
So y'all going to have to Idon't know what the protocol is,
but figure it out, get me downfrom this thing, right?
So as I was up there, I said,okay, you trust the ropes, the
equipment, you trust the peoplein charge, and I realized I
didn't trust myself fully, yeah.
(08:01):
So I've been working on that,you know, working on trusting
myself, yeah, and learning howto be my biggest advocate.
And then that helped me notbecome so annoyed when the
people around me weren't I mean,don't get me wrong, those
people still don't need to bearound you but I allowed them
around me, I think at firstbecause they were echoing how I
(08:22):
was feeling on the inside alittle bit.
Oh for sure, yeah, because I'mBlack, right, I was raised in a
traditional Black family thatyou got a job and you got
benefits and you were happy,that was it.
So to say oh my God, 20,000likes on a post.
I sound ridiculous and so in mymind I'm like girl that is so
embarrassing right.
Chantée Christian (08:42):
First of all, let me stop you right now.
Okay, that is not embarrassing,but it feels that way when
you're used to being raiseddifferently.
Randi B. (08:50):
It's supposed to be a bonus.
Chantée Christian (08:52):
But, see, I think it's so important to
really like tweeze this out alittle bit, because to me it
feels like one, it's too commonin our entire community as Black
women, but Black people ingeneral, but two, it's this
(09:21):
polarity between being humbleand about humility.
We, especially as Black women,are not taught what it actually
is, and so of course, it feelsembarrassing for you to be like
I got 20,000 likes on a post,when really it's a point of
(09:42):
excitement because you got20,000 likes on our post.
And when I think about likeChristianity and how it all ties
in, especially how Black womenare raised in spaces and how it
is like generational right,because you and I are two
different generations and still,and yet it's the same thing
(10:05):
that echoes around us.
It's like this huge echochamber.
It really grinds my gearsbecause I tell some of my
clients this and, like those ofyou that believe in Jesus and
those of you that have everheard of him, believe it or not,
one way or another, you'veheard of the existence of said
person, the most humble personthat ever walked the earth,
perfect, and yet you always knewwho he was.
Randi B. (10:29):
Right.
Chantée Christian (10:30):
Right, there was never, not a fact that was
told through him.
Randi B. (10:35):
Right the point.
Chantée Christian (10:36):
Right.
He was still humble though,right, and I think that
sometimes, when we teachhumility, we infuse this ego in
it.
It's not the ego, it's thefacts, and so if we're speaking
facts, then the facts are.
Ma'am, you got 20,000 likes ona post, right Doing the damn
(10:57):
thing.
Randi B. (10:58):
But it goes back.
It's a full circle momentbecause just at the beginning,
when you said tell us aboutyourself I think that's why it's
difficult to talk aboutyourself, because you feel
almost like you're bragging.
It's hard to talk aboutyourself and it's funny, the
post I did get 20,000, actuallyI think it's double.
That was a post I had doneabout Cardi B and she had said
she was a 10.
(11:18):
When I tell you people weredogging her like ripping her
apart for calling herself a 10.
And I told people, I said itreally made me scared.
I said, because I'm on thisjourney now in my 50s, still on
this journey to love myself andto celebrate myself, and people
tell you that's what you shoulddo.
But the minute you do, theminute you do, people tear you
(11:39):
down.
And so I said this quote thatI'd heard before that said
people love you until you loveyourself.
Chantée Christian (11:46):
Oh, that's good Right.
Randi B. (11:48):
And I said you can't take a compliment, because if
someone says, girl, I love thatdress, we feel like we have to
say, oh, it was on sale, or it'sold, or honey, it's so tight on
me, are you sure?
We can't just say, thank you, Iknow, girl, I'll wear this
tonight.
Right yeah, thank you, I know,girl, I'll wear this tonight.
Right yeah, because we've beenso trained to always put
(12:09):
ourselves down, particularly asBlack women, because I'll tell
you, I have two Black sons.
If I say to them, oh, you lookreally nice today, they'll say I
know, right.
Chantée Christian (12:17):
Look at that, look at that.
Randi B. (12:20):
No, but I didn't teach them that I think testosterone,
I'm telling you, I think menhave an arrogance.
I mean, I call it arrogance, aconfidence that most women don't
have.
Chantée Christian (12:32):
Because we're not taught to, we're not taught
to, we're not taught to andwe're not celebrated when we do,
we're called stuck up.
Randi B. (12:39):
She thinks she's cute.
Who does she think she is?
Chantée Christian (12:41):
Yeah, exactly what happened to Cardi B.
She was like I'm a 10.
And when?
Randi B. (12:46):
someone says who does she think she is?
It should be.
She thinks she's fantastic, shereally loves herself, and is
that?
Chantée Christian (12:52):
a bad thing.
When did loving oneself becomea bad thing?
Since forever?
Randi B. (12:57):
as a woman, as a girl, we've always been taught to
play small, yeah, but you haveto love yourself.
You have to think highly ofyourself in order to be an
entrepreneur, in order to be aleader, in order to even post,
to think that you have somethingto say, regardless if it's at
(13:17):
your job, even if you have acorporate job, but you post.
You have to think that you havesomething to say that people
would esteem as valuable.
And so we hurt ourselves byblocking the love that we should
have for ourselves.
Chantée Christian (13:33):
That was good .
Say it for the people in theback.
Randi B. (13:38):
I'm trying to create this echo chamber in myself.
I'm telling you, I've blockedmyself worse than anybody else.
I am my own worst enemy becauseof that fear of loving myself.
I'm telling you, I've blockedmyself worse than anybody else.
I am my own worst enemy becauseof that fear of loving myself.
The stigma that's attached toit.
It's important that we loveourselves.
Chantée Christian (13:53):
No, it is, and I think that there's been so
much shame around lovingourselves and taking care of
ourselves and even if you justthink about it historically
right, I always like to take itback.
Take it back.
It's only been a little over400 years since we have been in
(14:15):
an institution that created aspace where we couldn't be
loving on ourselves.
We had to be protective, we hadto fight and we had to be on
guard, and then, as theprogression of that, we've
always and continually stillhaving to be on guard.
(14:36):
But now we're taking care ofeveryone else too, and so there
hasn't been a generation yetthat's an adult that hasn't had
direct impacts of that tricklingeffect.
So of course, we shy away fromthe spotlight.
(14:57):
It wasn't safe, and we are innew times where it still doesn't
feel safe at times.
Randi B. (15:06):
Oh, I have really paid attention just in the way that
they spoke about our formerfirst lady, michelle Obama, and
the way they talked about here.
This woman is an Ivy Leaguegraduate, used to be a former
managing partner, which is atough place to get.
A mother of two children whoare doing well, a wife, just
(15:30):
someone that anyone else wouldlook up to, and they have and
continue to tear her down, andso I mean, yes, we should think
about 400 years ago, but look,you can look at four hours ago,
four days ago, four months agoor months ago.
We are continuously maligned,and I believe that it's
purposeful.
(15:51):
I think that there is a wholewell, white supremacy is
designed to make us feel lessthan Right, and so you either
look at all the features that wehated about ourselves, from our
lips to our butt, and howthey're now just seen as great
because they're not on us.
They're being purchased byother people.
It's understandable, and so Ibelieve loving yourself is the
(16:15):
greatest revolution.
They say being yourself is thegreatest revolution.
Loving yourself, particularlyfor a black woman, is the
greatest revolution, and we needto do it.
We're absolutely for ourhappiness and success.
We have to start to believe inourselves and listen.
We do a good job in believingin each other.
Chantée Christian (16:33):
Ain't nothing like sisterhood.
Randi B. (16:35):
We hype each other up but, we need to do it for
ourselves too.
Chantée Christian (16:39):
Yeah, and I was actually talking to a client
earlier today and we were goingthrough her intentions for 2025
and she just kept saying I'mnot fully showing up and I was
like, well, what does fullyshowing up look like for you?
And she was saying I post, butI don't post consistently.
I share highlights and thingsthat are happening, but not
(17:03):
consistently.
I don't really listen to myintuition fully, like I'll hear
it and be like no, that ain't itRight, like how you were
talking about you and God havingfrank conversations, because a
lot of times, walking in ourpurpose isn't easy.
Well, let me rephrase that 95%of the time, walking in your
purpose, regardless of what yourpurpose is, your purpose,
(17:24):
regardless of what your purposeis, is not an easy cakewalk.
Randi B. (17:29):
No.
Chantée Christian (17:29):
Right.
I'm constantly reminded that Iwas chosen for this.
I did not pick this Right, andI'll tell anyone that my idea of
life was being a partner at PWCby 40.
That was it.
That's all I wanted to do.
I didn't know what was going tohappen after that.
That's all I wanted to do.
I didn't know what was going tohappen after that, but that's
all I wanted to do.
(17:49):
And then life changed.
I changed because I wasn'tliving and walking in my gifts
and walking in my purpose, andso when she said that I thought
about me, I was like what Idon't post consistently?
Randi B. (18:10):
But I think that goes back to because I didn't.
I just started postingconsistently and I get better
and better because, again, Iwasn't taking myself seriously.
And it's hard because you postand you might have not very many
people that even look at it,much less like it, and you're
like what am I doing?
And that's what I mean.
(18:31):
You have to believe in yourselfso much that you said I'm doing
what I'm supposed to be doing.
It took a lot for me to takemyself seriously and say because
I would do it for somebody else.
If I were getting paid by acorporation to work on their
marketing and I knew I needed topost every day, I bet you I
would do it with no problem,regardless of how many likes I
got or anything.
(18:53):
But when it comes to posting formyself, about myself and my
feelings and opinions, I didn't.
And so it all goes back tobelieving in ourselves.
And so I said I believe in whatI'm doing.
Or let me tell you somethingI'm not quite there, but I'm
faking it.
And since I started faking itand taking myself seriously, I
am telling you I saw a change intwo weeks.
(19:15):
I mean a real change in twoweeks, which also helped me to
say okay, girl, now you got it.
You're taking yourselfseriously.
The world will mirror that backto you.
Now they're taking it.
Chantée Christian (19:26):
The world will mirror that back to you.
Now they're tickers, yeah, butI had to do it.
Yeah, it reminds me of like,because you're being obedient
and you're doing what he toldyou to do.
You're seeing the fruits ofyour labor right Versus you,
halfly doing what he asked youto do Correct, and halfly seeing
the fruits, yeah, sometimes noteven halfly, just like none no
(19:49):
fruit.
Randi B. (19:51):
It's a dry dead tree.
Chantée Christian (19:53):
Listen, that's a preach to myself, okay.
So I made a bingo card lastyear.
I made one this year too, but Imade a bingo card and on the
bingo card I said go viral onone of these crazy ass platforms
, just one.
Well, I also didn't do half ofthe things I was supposed to do
on the platforms, right?
However, I posted one day aboutme and a friend going hiking on
(20:13):
TikTok.
That video has almost 20,000views.
I wasn't even in it.
I don't remember anythingimportant about it.
When I tell you, there were solike over 300 comments.
I was like this has nothing todo with my content, and yet this
(20:35):
is what was the thing, and Ifelt bad for all the new
followers that came on because Iwas like that's not the content
that I provide.
Randi B. (20:44):
Absolutely feel the same way, right?
Because the ones that have donewell, I think I'd be in my
authentic self and I'm like letme just real quick, just tell
these people that I didn't likethat movie or whatever.
And it'll be the one that goesbonkers, yeah, and then the one
that I'm being serious like I'llget nothing, but it's okay,
yeah, it's okay, yeah.
Chantée Christian (21:06):
It's okay.
Yeah, that branch of lovingyourself is also being
consistent with yourself, right,right, like how you were saying
, like if it was a nine to fiveor a job, it would be something
that you would do, and so it'slike, well, why can't I do that
for me?
It's a lack of love somewhere.
Randi B. (21:24):
I believe that.
No, I agree, I know that when Ihave to show up to a work
because I still do a lot ofonline trainings I've never been
late to an online training.
But when I show up to myphysical training, for my
workouts, I have never been ontime Because that's for me and
(21:47):
it's something I'm working on.
But again, I really do believethat it goes back to that love
piece.
Chantée Christian (21:54):
Yeah, and I think it's just.
It's something that we need somuch more of and more
understanding of theimplications of it when we don't
Right.
Right, because we're talkingabout it from, like, an
entrepreneurship side, but if welook at this from someone who
is still working at 9 to 5, andI'm thinking of so many ways
(22:17):
that it shows up lack ofboundaries, right, yeah, lack of
boundaries, like telling peopleno.
Randi B. (22:25):
How do we expect people to respect us if we don't
fully respect ourselves?
Or even when you think aboutour romantic lives, how do we
expect someone to love us if wetruly don't love ourselves?
And I believe people can senseit, I believe they can sniff it,
they could tell like a dogcould like when you have
weaknesses and holes that theycan like get through Absolutely.
(22:47):
And so the journey is the lovefor ourselves, because it
directs everything we do witheverybody.
Chantée Christian (22:54):
A hundred percent, and it's so important
to realize that the people thatwe like so listening to this
book, which I don't even knowwhy I'm listening to it.
Well, I mean, I'm about to tellyou the title, so that part
will be clear, but it's calledwhy You're Not Married Yet, and
I'm listening to it and I'mchuckling because I'm thinking
(23:15):
about all of the guys that Idated for a certain period of
time that I said were the sameperson.
Randi B. (23:23):
Oh yeah.
Chantée Christian (23:24):
I'm like, I don't understand, like they have
.
Well, I'm the commondenominator, right.
Right and so it's like, okay,well, it's something about me
that's one attracting them rightand it's something about me
that like something about themthat I'm not being honest about.
(23:47):
And so when you talk about thatlack of love, to me it's like
this little pillar of a voidthat really needs to be filled.
But first we got to feel itwithin ourselves.
So when I started doing thework and really exploring, like
what the hell is wrong with meand that was not from a
judgmental perspective that waslike I've got to stop dating the
same guy.
This shit is terrible.
(24:08):
And like something's got tochange.
I was like, oh, it really wasme.
Now, that didn't mean that theyweren't.
You know how they were.
However, there was a piece ofme that liked some of those
things.
It was a piece of me that wasgiving off the energy of I'm not
really trying to be in arelationship or I really like
(24:28):
being kind of carefree until Ididn't right.
Randi B. (24:31):
Right.
Chantée Christian (24:32):
But it so starts with us.
Randi B. (24:35):
People spend a lot of time talking about the people in
their lives that suck, Don'tget me wrong, that's fun too,
Like it's nice to dog over, youknow, when you've gone through
something bad.
But ultimately, the question Ialways ask my friends is like
but we have to talk about whydid we choose that person?
Yeah, why did we choose thatperson?
Yeah, Right, yeah.
And usually I mean I can go onand on about that why did we let
(24:59):
that job mistreat us for years?
And this is the thing, and thisis where I believe Black women.
Although we do uplift eachother, I do believe that our
history and everything we dowork from a scarcity mindset.
Oh for sure, and so I do believethat we will tell each other
girl please, you got a good job,they paying you that much and
(25:19):
ain't you get benefits?
Girl, please, you be crazy toleave that job.
Girl, please, your man makesthis much and he might be
hitting you upside your head andcheating or whatever the thing
is.
Or maybe he's loyal, kind,wonderful, but he's boring you
to death or whatever it is.
Yeah, I think that we very muchencourage each other to settle
(25:41):
in all things, thinking thatwe're being loving, and I
believe I'll never forget this.
I was living in Marin County,california, which is
extraordinarily white, and it'swhen the money markets crash and
I'm hiking with these and oh somy husband is like a corporate
attorney and he's like I don'tknow if I'm gonna have a job
(26:02):
Immediately.
I'm like shoot, you know we cansell this house.
I'm gonna go back and do this.
You know I'm up to like I'mdoing bake sale, the bar to kids
school.
We're going to get this money.
I'll be in a strong black woman, Right?
So the next day I go hikingwith these women where their
husbands were actuallystockbrokers and stuff.
They were actually moneymanagers and already lost their
jobs, and the women are verymuch like.
(26:23):
I don't know what he's going todo, because I told him I have to
have my nanny because you know,I have tennis on Thursdays, I
have Pilates on Fridays, Ivolunteer at the library and he
needs to figure it out.
And I'm like, oh, theexpectation, and I'm not saying
I still shouldn't be a writer,right?
(26:44):
But what you expect, right,what the expectation is.
And then I have a similar story.
I was in Mykonos, greece,turned out.
I didn't know I was there forthis, but it was a big party
that happens every year, turnedout.
I didn't know I was there forthis, but it was a big party
that happens every year.
And we're at the speech club,jackie O's speech club, and
everybody is a gay man, but meand my friend Terry, another
(27:05):
black woman, and her two gayfriends.
When I tell you, every man andI'm talking about thousands of
men was fine, I'm talking aboutbodies it's a bathing suit I'm
talking fine, I'm looking good.
And it's a bathing suit, I'mtalking fine, I'm looking good.
And I said, see, theexpectations from a gay man to
another gay man is I like thiskind of body, honey, like I need
(27:25):
a body?
And I say, and the men, theyjust know we'll take them.
Like, just here, we are feelingourselves, sometimes trying to
look a certain way, and we willhave a man who's, let's just say
, the body ain't tight, but theexpectation they don't feel like
they have to reach out to you.
They may feel like they have toearn a certain amount, but they
don't think about their looksthe same way.
(27:46):
And I was like people dosometimes serve you to your
level of expectation.
You know expectations and youknow expectations.
And when we're telling peopleI'll accept anything, that's
exactly what the hell.
They give you that part,anything, anything.
So that's another thing I'vebeen thinking about.
Even with that, I've alwaystried to be that super nice
person when I go to restaurantsor stay at hotels.
(28:08):
So don't get me wrong, I'mstill nice and respectful.
But I see how they jump forother people and I'm like I
expect good service too, youknow.
Chantée Christian (28:16):
I'm nice.
Randi B. (28:17):
I'm nice about it, don't act inappropriate.
But I believe that we need toraise the bar for each other and
say, no, baby, you aredeserving of that.
What do you want that?
Of course you should.
Of course you should want tomake this much, have this much
vacation time, this type ofbenefits and a company car.
So I'm going to help you.
(28:38):
Look for something Instead ofsaying, girl, you better be
happy with that job.
Chantée Christian (28:42):
Yeah, like we do.
It's an old mentality, right.
It's that mindset of we didn'thave it and so now you have it
and you've got to hold on to it,right?
So scarcity at its best and atits finest.
And something that I remembertelling someone when I was
trying to make my decision onshould I leave corporate,
shouldn't I leave?
(29:02):
Because it really wasn't in myplan to leave.
I remember someone saying, oh myGod, you would leave that great
job for what?
Like that's crazy.
And I remember saying to themthis isn't your vision.
I didn't come to you aboutwhether, if it's because a good
job is the reason why I shouldstay or not, that's not why I
(29:26):
should stay.
I should stay because I feellike I'm still doing the work,
like I'm still being impactful,right, versus feeling like I'm
being controlled and doing allthese other things.
And so I remember also sayingI've got to protect my vision,
because everyone doesn't haveand share in the vision, right.
(29:49):
And because of that, they'reprojecting their own fears on
you, absolutely, and it's in thebest.
Like they mean well, but likeone of my grandmothers used to
say, the pathway to hell waspaved with good intentions.
Like your intentions meannothing.
Because when she said that shewas thinking you got a lifestyle
, you like to live, you have allof these things Well, she is
(30:12):
not wrong.
Yes, right, let's be clear.
And that wasn't what I needed inthe moment, and it wasn't that
I needed somebody to say, oh myGod, that's a great idea.
I needed somebody to reallyhelp me think through the
process.
Right, because, while I'venever been through a divorce, I
felt like, after I've been inthe workforce for almost 20
(30:34):
years of doing a thing and beingidentified with this thing,
that I was abandoning it andthat who was I going to be
without it?
Right, and so with someone thatasks me, who am I, I tell the
people a little bit about myself.
I struggled so much because Iwas so used to saying I'm a
(30:55):
consultant, I do this, or,especially like in the DMV, what
do you do?
Right, everybody.
I hate that question, but it'salways well, what do you do?
Who do you work for?
And so I was able to quicklyrattle it off.
But then, when I left, I waslike who am I?
Right?
And then I had to get clearwith I'm not any of that stuff.
(31:15):
Yes, I do those things, butthat's not who I am.
Randi B. (31:19):
Mm, hmm.
Chantée Christian (31:20):
And through the dating process, because I
had also reentered the datingworld around the same time.
Guys would be like, well, whatdo you do?
And I'd be like do I tell themthat I have an award winning
podcast and I'm a best sellingauthor?
Who am I to this person?
And so I think that, like for meit was when you talked about
(31:42):
earlier around community, it wasthat small group of people that
I could trust with my visionand with my heart to be able to
be real with me, yes, to be like.
You know, every day will be agreat day, but you can crunch
those numbers how you want tocrunch them, you know.
If you're ready, go do it.
If you're not ready, stay untilyou feel like you're ready and
(32:05):
explore the why you're not ready.
Randi B. (32:07):
Right, yeah, I love that and are we ever really
ready it's funny when we weretalking earlier, I was thinking
about again your expectationsand how we come to scarcity
mindset when I started speaking.
Until this day, I do not demandwhat a lot of speakers ask for
and I'll be kind of like, well,whatever you have, like I should
(32:30):
just be happy, you know, andit's taken.
I have a couple of really goodfriends.
It's like no, you need tocharge at least this, so I at
least have my minimum.
But it has been a struggle andagain that goes back to the work
I'm doing to love myself, tofeel as if I'm deserving, yeah,
of the same thing, likeparticularly in DEI.
(32:51):
The highest paid DEI speakersare white women who have been in
the game, some of them wayshorter time than I have, are,
you know, published authors onthe subject and things like that
.
But it's like what I wastalking about their husbands.
They have the expectation theysee themselves as worthy and
deserving, and so I write thatdown.
(33:11):
I say you are worthy, you areworthy, but it's, it's a process
and we need to work on ensuringthat the generations,
especially me, behind me, evenin front of me, because we're
still trying of just realizingthat we're worthy, because it
affects even, like what I'mthinking about my generation and
older even going to the doctoradvocating for yourself because
(33:31):
you are worthy of this person'stime and them paying attention
and ensuring you're getting agood checkup or whatever.
And knowing your worth man,like really knowing your worth
is powerful throughout.
Chantée Christian (33:41):
Yeah that's powerful.
And I remember I had gotten abusiness coach and he asked me
how much did I charge for myspeaking engagements?
And I told him and I heard audand I was like hello.
He said I fell off my porchbecause are you kidding me?
(34:04):
And I was like no.
He was like hold on, hold on,hold on.
Let me go pull back up your bio, right?
He said, because maybe I'm theone that's mistaken.
He said because maybe I'm theone that's mistaken.
He was like do you know howmany literal letters you have
behind your name?
I was like I do.
(34:25):
He was like there's no reasonwhy you aren't doing 10 times
this number as your base.
And I was like no one is payingthat type of money.
So I go, they are, I go into my, I go into my chat and people
are like oh yeah, I don't speakfor anything less than a grand.
I don't speak for any.
And I'm like USD, are wetalking about pesos?
(34:47):
Because I'm confused Exceptpesos, hilarious.
And so I had to practice sayingthe number.
Yes, because I was souncomfortable with saying the
number, which I'm like.
Now, if you ask me for aconsulting fee, I don't have no
problem saying that numberbecause I had been saying it for
(35:07):
so long but I hadn't said myspeaker fee or all these things,
and so I was just like peoplepaying that.
Randi B. (35:17):
Right, where are they Sign me up?
Sign me up.
But the thing is is, if youknew your worth, it doesn't even
matter what people are paying,because people will find your
price.
Like, yeah, people could buypurses for $20, but there's
somebody who said my purse isworth $5,000.
Well, and people sure boughtthem.
Chantée Christian (35:34):
Well and buy, and you telling us what do you
want to leave the people with?
Randi B. (35:46):
Oh, I, think I've been saying it, since I've been
running my mouth, that you areworthy.
You're absolutely worthy and tocontinuously your number one job
should be continuously lovingyourself and building up
yourself.
Loving yourself and building upyourself so you feel as if
(36:11):
you're worthy of all the greatthings that this universe has
for you.
And I believe that when we feelas if we're worthy, we are
better for the people around us.
And we talk about spoilingourselves and taking care of
ourselves.
And it's so easy to go get ourhair done and our nails done,
our massages, our buyingourselves something.
That's not the work.
That is not.
(36:33):
That's easy.
The work is inner and findingall the areas where we're
blocked and there are tons, yeah, and just continuously doing
the work.
Because what I am experiencingnow and I'm sad it took me 54
years to get here you know ithas been a constant journey as
more doors are opening, as I amseeing my worth, as I am walking
(36:58):
away from things, as I am inthe biggest struggle I've ever
had right now, business-wise,where someone hasn't done me
right and I've never.
This has never happened to meand they've made some threats to
me and I don't know why I'm socalm, cause I'm like you can
take it, because I'm going toget twice as much later I'll be
(37:21):
fine, and I'm only there nowbecause I have worked on myself
and I believe in myself morethan I did a year ago or five
years ago.
So that's what I would say, andI know it's harder,
particularly for Black women,which is why we should work
harder to get it.
I love that.
Chantée Christian (37:41):
I love that.
And how can people find you onthese social media platforms and
make sure we build up yourlikes and your following?
Randi B. (37:48):
Oh, thank you, I'm Randi B, everybody, and that's
with an I R-A-N-D-I-B.
So on Facebook, I'm Randi B.
On Instagram, I'm Randiunderscore, underscore B.
On TikTok, I'm the Randi B.
I'm moving to fan base TikTok.
I'm having trust issues with itright now.
I don't know how long orforever or whatever.
I'm on all the things, anything.
(38:10):
You're on LinkedIn, I'm RandiBryant.
So, whatever, just go on it.
I'm even on the red note.
Whatever it is, I'm Randi B orsomething.
Just look for.
Chantée Christian (38:17):
Randi B and you'll find me.
Yes, her SEO works wonders.
Oh, it does.
Randi B. (38:23):
It does, it does.
Chantée Christian (38:23):
And oh, it does, it does, it does, it does.
And we will also make sure thatall of your handles and all
those things are in the shownotes.
Randi B. (38:31):
Okay, thank you.
Oh, and truthing cards.
Just real quick Truthing cardsfor Black people to ask.
You know, it's like a game onAmazon.
Those are called truthing, sotruthing I-N-G on truth.
That's also a way you can findme.
Chantée Christian (38:44):
And when do they air on the good TV?
Randi B. (38:47):
Oh, so right now.
My show started about two weeksago and it is called Truthing
on Amazon Prime.
If you go to Amazon Prime rightnow and look up Truthing, you
will see me and listen to theshow.
We have some good topics likecan you be pro-Black and only
date white people?
What does Black mean?
Do we hurt ourselves as Blackpeople by trying to assimilate?
(39:09):
And it's Black people havingthese conversations, these
honest conversations, and doingsome truly.
Chantée Christian (39:14):
Mm-hmm, look at that, look at that, y'all she
on TV.
Y'all she on TV.
No, I thank you so so much foralways saying yes.
You know, I just I trulyappreciate not just the work you
so so much for always sayingyes.
You know, I just I trulyappreciate not just the work you
do, but the re-gifting andreinforcement for the community
(39:36):
and I just appreciate you somuch and thank you.
Randi B. (39:40):
And thank you for seeing me and asking me so I can
say yes and providing theopportunities.
That validates people and meparticularly.
So thank you so much.
Chantée Christian (39:49):
Thank you I enjoy talking with Randi B about
embracing self-worth, livingauthentically and the powerful
journey of self-discovery.
Her insights on navigatingchallenges, building community
and unapologetically claimingour worth are truly inspiring.
(40:09):
Thank you for joining us andremember to stop doing shit that
doesn't serve you.
For more information or ifyou'd like to reach out to us,
visit us at mybestshiftunderscore LLC on Instagram.
See you later.
Welcome to the My Best Shift podcast.
I'm your host, ChantéeChristian.
In today's episode, I'll betalking about embracing
self-worth and the power ofauthenticity with Randi B.
Hi Randi, how you doing today.
Randi B. (00:19):
I am doing pretty well .
Thank you for having me, lady.
Good to talk to you.
Chantée Christian (00:24):
Yes, it's so good to see you.
So before we get too deep intoour conversation today, why
don't you tell the people alittle bit about yourself?
Randi B. (00:33):
That's always a tough question.
It's why it's so hard to talkabout ourselves, right Always.
Chantée Christian (00:38):
It's the one question that always stops
people.
Randi B. (00:40):
Right, my name is Randi B.
, or Randi Bryant.
I am a former DEI person,diversity, equity and inclusion
person.
I have owned a changemanagement company for 24 years.
Recently I have gone rogue andhave spent more time just
(01:01):
talking directly and candidlyabout issues that before I used
to tiptoe around because Ididn't want to offend people or
you know, the truth is hard.
So the center of my platform iscalled Truthy.
I'm all about truth and tellingyour truth, living your truth,
listening to the truth of others.
I believe that's the only waywe make change.
(01:21):
That's me, I mean.
I don't know what else to say.
I'm a Sagittarius.
I like traveling.
Chantée Christian (01:30):
It feels like a dating profile.
Randi B. (01:34):
I'm 5'7, with brown eyes.
Chantée Christian (01:41):
So I met you at an event where you were
talking about what it lookedlike and what it felt like to
own a business as a Black womanand be a change agent.
There's so much of this lifethat we have been living and so
much literal change that ishappening, what feels like every
day, and I'm curious like howdo you sustain?
Randi B. (02:08):
Wine.
Oh no, I'm sorry, oh sorry,you're looking for both of that.
I believe that the typicalworkforce has made it difficult,
particularly for Black women,to function and also be happy
not to, like DMX say.
You know y'all gonna make melose my mind up in here.
(02:34):
I think it's literally almost ahostile place for us to be most
places, and so we have decidedto create spaces of our own, and
once you feel the level ofpeace that comes with that and
by peace that doesn't meanyou're not working ungodly hours
, you are not crying, staying upall night, wondering how you're
going to pay bills, like all ofthat exists.
(02:55):
I don't want to glamorize beingan entrepreneur, but just the
peace of not having to deal withthe microaggressions piece of
not having to deal with themicroaggressions, the
macroaggressions, just thefeeling that if you work your
butt off, if you work hardenough, you can actually
accomplish some things, whereasI believe that we became
discouraged in typicalworkplaces where we felt as if,
(03:18):
regardless of how hard we worked, we could not get to where we
deserve to be, and so I managedit.
One just the fear of having togo back to a traditional place.
So fear of that helps Walkingin my purpose.
I'm absolutely doing what Ifeel that I should be doing,
even though sometimes I don'twant to do it because it's
(03:39):
difficult and challenging.
And sometimes I'm asking youknow, god and I have some frank
conversations, so I'm like, okay, let's talk about this again.
So what you're saying is, thisis what I'm supposed to be doing
, like I'm getting this feeling,but you're not making it easy
for me.
I thought if I did what I wasso called to do, then it would
be easy.
And no, that's not it.
Chantée Christian (04:00):
My God, if I had a white towel.
Oh my God, my God, if I had awhite towel, I'd throw it at you
.
Randi B. (04:07):
Sorry, go ahead Surrounding yourself with the
right people.
You will lose people along yourjourney.
Yeah, having people thatsupport you.
You know there's always memesthat talk about those people
that say, oh, your little job,your little company, you're
trying to do your little hobbyand put you down.
You know they don't validatewhat you're doing and you need
validation because it is scary.
(04:28):
It's scary to be out here byyourself and being judged on
things Protecting yourself.
Because I am so public Mostpeople who have a job in their
business you're going to bepublic, even if it's just on
Yelp or something.
People are unhappy.
So sometimes people there'sjust on Yelp or something.
People are unhappy, sosometimes people there's no day.
(04:49):
I don't get nasty things to me.
I mean there is no day and soyou have to.
I'm not necessarily sayingbuild up a tough skin.
I'm saying block people, useyour resources.
Chantée Christian (04:59):
Yeah, absolutely.
I love that and I think thatit's important to really talk
about the debunking ofglamorizing entrepreneurship.
So it's coming up on four yearssince I left corporate and
became a solopreneur and Ithought it was this very rosy,
(05:22):
beautiful experience because ofall the things that I've seen
and that I heard about it.
And when I got in it I was like, well, where are the people who
gonna do it Me?
You know, like who are thesepeople?
And I think that it's also Iremember for Awareness, put Me
(05:45):
On.
We had a call and one of theauthors said you know, well,
it's just a little project.
And I saw red because I waslike there's nothing little
about this and if you're goingto surround yourself with people
who say that to you, then youneed to take a deeper look
within yourself to find out whythat's resonating with you.
(06:07):
Why aren't you upset about?
Randi B. (06:11):
it.
Yes, that has been arealization I've actually had
this past year.
I was my own worst advocate,yeah, and I didn't take myself
seriously as I should, and sowhy should I have expected
others to take me seriously?
(06:32):
I was doing the work, for sure,but I still did not respect
myself.
One of my friends did a retreata Pilates retreat 17 black women
at Maraval Resort, and I wasonly one of those black women
who did one of those in the airobstacle courses that are insane
(06:53):
.
Of course you did, I did, andthey show you the equipment
because they want you to trustthe equipment.
They say do you trust theequipment?
Do you trust that We'vedesigned this to keep you safe?
Then there's a woman who standson the ground who manages the
ropes and before they allow youto start climbing, you have to
answer the question that sheasked you do you trust me?
And I said yes, and so then Istarted climbing up the obstacle
(07:16):
course and I felt I was goingto die and I'm not scared of
heights, but I was terrified.
I finally get to the top beforeI've done any of the moving
across, and there's one of theiremployees up there and I said I
don't know what y'all do inthese situations, but you're
going to have to get ahelicopter to get my black ass
down because I'm not doing this,I'm not going down, I'm not
(07:39):
going through, I'm not goingaround.
So y'all going to have to Idon't know what the protocol is,
but figure it out, get me downfrom this thing, right?
So as I was up there, I said,okay, you trust the ropes, the
equipment, you trust the peoplein charge, and I realized I
didn't trust myself fully, yeah.
(08:01):
So I've been working on that,you know, working on trusting
myself, yeah, and learning howto be my biggest advocate.
And then that helped me notbecome so annoyed when the
people around me weren't I mean,don't get me wrong, those
people still don't need to bearound you but I allowed them
around me, I think at firstbecause they were echoing how I
(08:22):
was feeling on the inside alittle bit.
Oh for sure, yeah, because I'mBlack, right, I was raised in a
traditional Black family thatyou got a job and you got
benefits and you were happy,that was it.
So to say oh my God, 20,000likes on a post.
I sound ridiculous and so in mymind I'm like girl that is so
embarrassing right.
Chantée Christian (08:42):
First of all, let me stop you right now.
Okay, that is not embarrassing,but it feels that way when
you're used to being raiseddifferently.
Randi B. (08:50):
It's supposed to be a bonus.
Chantée Christian (08:52):
But, see, I think it's so important to
really like tweeze this out alittle bit, because to me it
feels like one, it's too commonin our entire community as Black
women, but Black people ingeneral, but two, it's this
(09:21):
polarity between being humbleand about humility.
We, especially as Black women,are not taught what it actually
is, and so of course, it feelsembarrassing for you to be like
I got 20,000 likes on a post,when really it's a point of
(09:42):
excitement because you got20,000 likes on our post.
And when I think about likeChristianity and how it all ties
in, especially how Black womenare raised in spaces and how it
is like generational right,because you and I are two
different generations and still,and yet it's the same thing
(10:05):
that echoes around us.
It's like this huge echochamber.
It really grinds my gearsbecause I tell some of my
clients this and, like those ofyou that believe in Jesus and
those of you that have everheard of him, believe it or not,
one way or another, you'veheard of the existence of said
person, the most humble personthat ever walked the earth,
perfect, and yet you always knewwho he was.
Randi B. (10:29):
Right.
Chantée Christian (10:30):
Right, there was never, not a fact that was
told through him.
Randi B. (10:35):
Right the point.
Chantée Christian (10:36):
Right.
He was still humble though,right, and I think that
sometimes, when we teachhumility, we infuse this ego in
it.
It's not the ego, it's thefacts, and so if we're speaking
facts, then the facts are.
Ma'am, you got 20,000 likes ona post, right Doing the damn
(10:57):
thing.
Randi B. (10:58):
But it goes back.
It's a full circle momentbecause just at the beginning,
when you said tell us aboutyourself I think that's why it's
difficult to talk aboutyourself, because you feel
almost like you're bragging.
It's hard to talk aboutyourself and it's funny, the
post I did get 20,000, actuallyI think it's double.
That was a post I had doneabout Cardi B and she had said
she was a 10.
(11:18):
When I tell you people weredogging her like ripping her
apart for calling herself a 10.
And I told people, I said itreally made me scared.
I said, because I'm on thisjourney now in my 50s, still on
this journey to love myself andto celebrate myself, and people
tell you that's what you shoulddo.
But the minute you do, theminute you do, people tear you
(11:39):
down.
And so I said this quote thatI'd heard before that said
people love you until you loveyourself.
Chantée Christian (11:46):
Oh, that's good Right.
Randi B. (11:48):
And I said you can't take a compliment, because if
someone says, girl, I love thatdress, we feel like we have to
say, oh, it was on sale, or it'sold, or honey, it's so tight on
me, are you sure?
We can't just say, thank you, Iknow, girl, I'll wear this
tonight.
Right yeah, thank you, I know,girl, I'll wear this tonight.
Right yeah, because we've beenso trained to always put
(12:09):
ourselves down, particularly asBlack women, because I'll tell
you, I have two Black sons.
If I say to them, oh, you lookreally nice today, they'll say I
know, right.
Chantée Christian (12:17):
Look at that, look at that.
Randi B. (12:20):
No, but I didn't teach them that I think testosterone,
I'm telling you, I think menhave an arrogance.
I mean, I call it arrogance, aconfidence that most women don't
have.
Chantée Christian (12:32):
Because we're not taught to, we're not taught
to, we're not taught to andwe're not celebrated when we do,
we're called stuck up.
Randi B. (12:39):
She thinks she's cute.
Who does she think she is?
Chantée Christian (12:41):
Yeah, exactly what happened to Cardi B.
She was like I'm a 10.
And when?
Randi B. (12:46):
someone says who does she think she is?
It should be.
She thinks she's fantastic, shereally loves herself, and is
that?
Chantée Christian (12:52):
a bad thing.
When did loving oneself becomea bad thing?
Since forever?
Randi B. (12:57):
as a woman, as a girl, we've always been taught to
play small, yeah, but you haveto love yourself.
You have to think highly ofyourself in order to be an
entrepreneur, in order to be aleader, in order to even post,
to think that you have somethingto say, regardless if it's at
(13:17):
your job, even if you have acorporate job, but you post.
You have to think that you havesomething to say that people
would esteem as valuable.
And so we hurt ourselves byblocking the love that we should
have for ourselves.
Chantée Christian (13:33):
That was good .
Say it for the people in theback.
Randi B. (13:38):
I'm trying to create this echo chamber in myself.
I'm telling you, I've blockedmyself worse than anybody else.
I am my own worst enemy becauseof that fear of loving myself.
I'm telling you, I've blockedmyself worse than anybody else.
I am my own worst enemy becauseof that fear of loving myself.
The stigma that's attached toit.
It's important that we loveourselves.
Chantée Christian (13:53):
No, it is, and I think that there's been so
much shame around lovingourselves and taking care of
ourselves and even if you justthink about it historically
right, I always like to take itback.
Take it back.
It's only been a little over400 years since we have been in
(14:15):
an institution that created aspace where we couldn't be
loving on ourselves.
We had to be protective, we hadto fight and we had to be on
guard, and then, as theprogression of that, we've
always and continually stillhaving to be on guard.
(14:36):
But now we're taking care ofeveryone else too, and so there
hasn't been a generation yetthat's an adult that hasn't had
direct impacts of that tricklingeffect.
So of course, we shy away fromthe spotlight.
(14:57):
It wasn't safe, and we are innew times where it still doesn't
feel safe at times.
Randi B. (15:06):
Oh, I have really paid attention just in the way that
they spoke about our formerfirst lady, michelle Obama, and
the way they talked about here.
This woman is an Ivy Leaguegraduate, used to be a former
managing partner, which is atough place to get.
A mother of two children whoare doing well, a wife, just
(15:30):
someone that anyone else wouldlook up to, and they have and
continue to tear her down, andso I mean, yes, we should think
about 400 years ago, but look,you can look at four hours ago,
four days ago, four months agoor months ago.
We are continuously maligned,and I believe that it's
purposeful.
(15:51):
I think that there is a wholewell, white supremacy is
designed to make us feel lessthan Right, and so you either
look at all the features that wehated about ourselves, from our
lips to our butt, and howthey're now just seen as great
because they're not on us.
They're being purchased byother people.
It's understandable, and so Ibelieve loving yourself is the
(16:15):
greatest revolution.
They say being yourself is thegreatest revolution.
Loving yourself, particularlyfor a black woman, is the
greatest revolution, and we needto do it.
We're absolutely for ourhappiness and success.
We have to start to believe inourselves and listen.
We do a good job in believingin each other.
Chantée Christian (16:33):
Ain't nothing like sisterhood.
Randi B. (16:35):
We hype each other up but, we need to do it for
ourselves too.
Chantée Christian (16:39):
Yeah, and I was actually talking to a client
earlier today and we were goingthrough her intentions for 2025
and she just kept saying I'mnot fully showing up and I was
like, well, what does fullyshowing up look like for you?
And she was saying I post, butI don't post consistently.
I share highlights and thingsthat are happening, but not
(17:03):
consistently.
I don't really listen to myintuition fully, like I'll hear
it and be like no, that ain't itRight, like how you were
talking about you and God havingfrank conversations, because a
lot of times, walking in ourpurpose isn't easy.
Well, let me rephrase that 95%of the time, walking in your
purpose, regardless of what yourpurpose is, your purpose,
(17:24):
regardless of what your purposeis, is not an easy cakewalk.
Randi B. (17:29):
No.
Chantée Christian (17:29):
Right.
I'm constantly reminded that Iwas chosen for this.
I did not pick this Right, andI'll tell anyone that my idea of
life was being a partner at PWCby 40.
That was it.
That's all I wanted to do.
I didn't know what was going tohappen after that.
That's all I wanted to do.
I didn't know what was going tohappen after that, but that's
all I wanted to do.
(17:49):
And then life changed.
I changed because I wasn'tliving and walking in my gifts
and walking in my purpose, andso when she said that I thought
about me, I was like what Idon't post consistently?
Randi B. (18:10):
But I think that goes back to because I didn't.
I just started postingconsistently and I get better
and better because, again, Iwasn't taking myself seriously.
And it's hard because you postand you might have not very many
people that even look at it,much less like it, and you're
like what am I doing?
And that's what I mean.
(18:31):
You have to believe in yourselfso much that you said I'm doing
what I'm supposed to be doing.
It took a lot for me to takemyself seriously and say because
I would do it for somebody else.
If I were getting paid by acorporation to work on their
marketing and I knew I needed topost every day, I bet you I
would do it with no problem,regardless of how many likes I
got or anything.
(18:53):
But when it comes to posting formyself, about myself and my
feelings and opinions, I didn't.
And so it all goes back tobelieving in ourselves.
And so I said I believe in whatI'm doing.
Or let me tell you somethingI'm not quite there, but I'm
faking it.
And since I started faking itand taking myself seriously, I
am telling you I saw a change intwo weeks.
(19:15):
I mean a real change in twoweeks, which also helped me to
say okay, girl, now you got it.
You're taking yourselfseriously.
The world will mirror that backto you.
Now they're taking it.
Chantée Christian (19:26):
The world will mirror that back to you.
Now they're tickers, yeah, butI had to do it.
Yeah, it reminds me of like,because you're being obedient
and you're doing what he toldyou to do.
You're seeing the fruits ofyour labor right Versus you,
halfly doing what he asked youto do Correct, and halfly seeing
the fruits, yeah, sometimes noteven halfly, just like none no
(19:49):
fruit.
Randi B. (19:51):
It's a dry dead tree.
Chantée Christian (19:53):
Listen, that's a preach to myself, okay.
So I made a bingo card lastyear.
I made one this year too, but Imade a bingo card and on the
bingo card I said go viral onone of these crazy ass platforms
, just one.
Well, I also didn't do half ofthe things I was supposed to do
on the platforms, right?
However, I posted one day aboutme and a friend going hiking on
(20:13):
TikTok.
That video has almost 20,000views.
I wasn't even in it.
I don't remember anythingimportant about it.
When I tell you, there were solike over 300 comments.
I was like this has nothing todo with my content, and yet this
(20:35):
is what was the thing, and Ifelt bad for all the new
followers that came on because Iwas like that's not the content
that I provide.
Randi B. (20:44):
Absolutely feel the same way, right?
Because the ones that have donewell, I think I'd be in my
authentic self and I'm like letme just real quick, just tell
these people that I didn't likethat movie or whatever.
And it'll be the one that goesbonkers, yeah, and then the one
that I'm being serious like I'llget nothing, but it's okay,
yeah, it's okay, yeah.
Chantée Christian (21:06):
It's okay.
Yeah, that branch of lovingyourself is also being
consistent with yourself, right,right, like how you were saying
, like if it was a nine to fiveor a job, it would be something
that you would do, and so it'slike, well, why can't I do that
for me?
It's a lack of love somewhere.
Randi B. (21:24):
I believe that.
No, I agree, I know that when Ihave to show up to a work
because I still do a lot ofonline trainings I've never been
late to an online training.
But when I show up to myphysical training, for my
workouts, I have never been ontime Because that's for me and
(21:47):
it's something I'm working on.
But again, I really do believethat it goes back to that love
piece.
Chantée Christian (21:54):
Yeah, and I think it's just.
It's something that we need somuch more of and more
understanding of theimplications of it when we don't
Right.
Right, because we're talkingabout it from, like, an
entrepreneurship side, but if welook at this from someone who
is still working at 9 to 5, andI'm thinking of so many ways
(22:17):
that it shows up lack ofboundaries, right, yeah, lack of
boundaries, like telling peopleno.
Randi B. (22:25):
How do we expect people to respect us if we don't
fully respect ourselves?
Or even when you think aboutour romantic lives, how do we
expect someone to love us if wetruly don't love ourselves?
And I believe people can senseit, I believe they can sniff it,
they could tell like a dogcould like when you have
weaknesses and holes that theycan like get through Absolutely.
(22:47):
And so the journey is the lovefor ourselves, because it
directs everything we do witheverybody.
Chantée Christian (22:54):
A hundred percent, and it's so important
to realize that the people thatwe like so listening to this
book, which I don't even knowwhy I'm listening to it.
Well, I mean, I'm about to tellyou the title, so that part
will be clear, but it's calledwhy You're Not Married Yet, and
I'm listening to it and I'mchuckling because I'm thinking
(23:15):
about all of the guys that Idated for a certain period of
time that I said were the sameperson.
Randi B. (23:23):
Oh yeah.
Chantée Christian (23:24):
I'm like, I don't understand, like they have
.
Well, I'm the commondenominator, right.
Right and so it's like, okay,well, it's something about me
that's one attracting them rightand it's something about me
that like something about themthat I'm not being honest about.
(23:47):
And so when you talk about thatlack of love, to me it's like
this little pillar of a voidthat really needs to be filled.
But first we got to feel itwithin ourselves.
So when I started doing thework and really exploring, like
what the hell is wrong with meand that was not from a
judgmental perspective that waslike I've got to stop dating the
same guy.
This shit is terrible.
(24:08):
And like something's got tochange.
I was like, oh, it really wasme.
Now, that didn't mean that theyweren't.
You know how they were.
However, there was a piece ofme that liked some of those
things.
It was a piece of me that wasgiving off the energy of I'm not
really trying to be in arelationship or I really like
(24:28):
being kind of carefree until Ididn't right.
Randi B. (24:31):
Right.
Chantée Christian (24:32):
But it so starts with us.
Randi B. (24:35):
People spend a lot of time talking about the people in
their lives that suck, Don'tget me wrong, that's fun too,
Like it's nice to dog over, youknow, when you've gone through
something bad.
But ultimately, the question Ialways ask my friends is like
but we have to talk about whydid we choose that person?
Yeah, why did we choose thatperson?
Yeah, Right, yeah.
And usually I mean I can go onand on about that why did we let
(24:59):
that job mistreat us for years?
And this is the thing, and thisis where I believe Black women.
Although we do uplift eachother, I do believe that our
history and everything we dowork from a scarcity mindset.
Oh for sure, and so I do believethat we will tell each other
girl please, you got a good job,they paying you that much and
(25:19):
ain't you get benefits?
Girl, please, you be crazy toleave that job.
Girl, please, your man makesthis much and he might be
hitting you upside your head andcheating or whatever the thing
is.
Or maybe he's loyal, kind,wonderful, but he's boring you
to death or whatever it is.
Yeah, I think that we very muchencourage each other to settle
(25:41):
in all things, thinking thatwe're being loving, and I
believe I'll never forget this.
I was living in Marin County,california, which is
extraordinarily white, and it'swhen the money markets crash and
I'm hiking with these and oh somy husband is like a corporate
attorney and he's like I don'tknow if I'm gonna have a job
(26:02):
Immediately.
I'm like shoot, you know we cansell this house.
I'm gonna go back and do this.
You know I'm up to like I'mdoing bake sale, the bar to kids
school.
We're going to get this money.
I'll be in a strong black woman, Right?
So the next day I go hikingwith these women where their
husbands were actuallystockbrokers and stuff.
They were actually moneymanagers and already lost their
jobs, and the women are verymuch like.
(26:23):
I don't know what he's going todo, because I told him I have to
have my nanny because you know,I have tennis on Thursdays, I
have Pilates on Fridays, Ivolunteer at the library and he
needs to figure it out.
And I'm like, oh, theexpectation, and I'm not saying
I still shouldn't be a writer,right?
(26:44):
But what you expect, right,what the expectation is.
And then I have a similar story.
I was in Mykonos, greece,turned out.
I didn't know I was there forthis, but it was a big party
that happens every year, turnedout.
I didn't know I was there forthis, but it was a big party
that happens every year.
And we're at the speech club,jackie O's speech club, and
everybody is a gay man, but meand my friend Terry, another
(27:05):
black woman, and her two gayfriends.
When I tell you, every man andI'm talking about thousands of
men was fine, I'm talking aboutbodies it's a bathing suit I'm
talking fine, I'm looking good.
And it's a bathing suit, I'mtalking fine, I'm looking good.
And I said, see, theexpectations from a gay man to
another gay man is I like thiskind of body, honey, like I need
(27:25):
a body?
And I say, and the men, theyjust know we'll take them.
Like, just here, we are feelingourselves, sometimes trying to
look a certain way, and we willhave a man who's, let's just say
, the body ain't tight, but theexpectation they don't feel like
they have to reach out to you.
They may feel like they have toearn a certain amount, but they
don't think about their looksthe same way.
(27:46):
And I was like people dosometimes serve you to your
level of expectation.
You know expectations and youknow expectations.
And when we're telling peopleI'll accept anything, that's
exactly what the hell.
They give you that part,anything, anything.
So that's another thing I'vebeen thinking about.
Even with that, I've alwaystried to be that super nice
person when I go to restaurantsor stay at hotels.
(28:08):
So don't get me wrong, I'mstill nice and respectful.
But I see how they jump forother people and I'm like I
expect good service too, youknow.
Chantée Christian (28:16):
I'm nice.
Randi B. (28:17):
I'm nice about it, don't act inappropriate.
But I believe that we need toraise the bar for each other and
say, no, baby, you aredeserving of that.
What do you want that?
Of course you should.
Of course you should want tomake this much, have this much
vacation time, this type ofbenefits and a company car.
So I'm going to help you.
(28:38):
Look for something Instead ofsaying, girl, you better be
happy with that job.
Chantée Christian (28:42):
Yeah, like we do.
It's an old mentality, right.
It's that mindset of we didn'thave it and so now you have it
and you've got to hold on to it,right?
So scarcity at its best and atits finest.
And something that I remembertelling someone when I was
trying to make my decision onshould I leave corporate,
shouldn't I leave?
(29:02):
Because it really wasn't in myplan to leave.
I remember someone saying, oh myGod, you would leave that great
job for what?
Like that's crazy.
And I remember saying to themthis isn't your vision.
I didn't come to you aboutwhether, if it's because a good
job is the reason why I shouldstay or not, that's not why I
(29:26):
should stay.
I should stay because I feellike I'm still doing the work,
like I'm still being impactful,right, versus feeling like I'm
being controlled and doing allthese other things.
And so I remember also sayingI've got to protect my vision,
because everyone doesn't haveand share in the vision, right.
(29:49):
And because of that, they'reprojecting their own fears on
you, absolutely, and it's in thebest.
Like they mean well, but likeone of my grandmothers used to
say, the pathway to hell waspaved with good intentions.
Like your intentions meannothing.
Because when she said that shewas thinking you got a lifestyle
, you like to live, you have allof these things Well, she is
(30:12):
not wrong.
Yes, right, let's be clear.
And that wasn't what I needed inthe moment, and it wasn't that
I needed somebody to say, oh myGod, that's a great idea.
I needed somebody to reallyhelp me think through the
process.
Right, because, while I'venever been through a divorce, I
felt like, after I've been inthe workforce for almost 20
(30:34):
years of doing a thing and beingidentified with this thing,
that I was abandoning it andthat who was I going to be
without it?
Right, and so with someone thatasks me, who am I, I tell the
people a little bit about myself.
I struggled so much because Iwas so used to saying I'm a
(30:55):
consultant, I do this, or,especially like in the DMV, what
do you do?
Right, everybody.
I hate that question, but it'salways well, what do you do?
Who do you work for?
And so I was able to quicklyrattle it off.
But then, when I left, I waslike who am I?
Right?
And then I had to get clearwith I'm not any of that stuff.
(31:15):
Yes, I do those things, butthat's not who I am.
Randi B. (31:19):
Mm, hmm.
Chantée Christian (31:20):
And through the dating process, because I
had also reentered the datingworld around the same time.
Guys would be like, well, whatdo you do?
And I'd be like do I tell themthat I have an award winning
podcast and I'm a best sellingauthor?
Who am I to this person?
And so I think that, like for meit was when you talked about
(31:42):
earlier around community, it wasthat small group of people that
I could trust with my visionand with my heart to be able to
be real with me, yes, to be like.
You know, every day will be agreat day, but you can crunch
those numbers how you want tocrunch them, you know.
If you're ready, go do it.
If you're not ready, stay untilyou feel like you're ready and
(32:05):
explore the why you're not ready.
Randi B. (32:07):
Right, yeah, I love that and are we ever really
ready it's funny when we weretalking earlier, I was thinking
about again your expectationsand how we come to scarcity
mindset when I started speaking.
Until this day, I do not demandwhat a lot of speakers ask for
and I'll be kind of like, well,whatever you have, like I should
(32:30):
just be happy, you know, andit's taken.
I have a couple of really goodfriends.
It's like no, you need tocharge at least this, so I at
least have my minimum.
But it has been a struggle andagain that goes back to the work
I'm doing to love myself, tofeel as if I'm deserving, yeah,
of the same thing, likeparticularly in DEI.
(32:51):
The highest paid DEI speakersare white women who have been in
the game, some of them wayshorter time than I have, are,
you know, published authors onthe subject and things like that
.
But it's like what I wastalking about their husbands.
They have the expectation theysee themselves as worthy and
deserving, and so I write thatdown.
(33:11):
I say you are worthy, you areworthy, but it's, it's a process
and we need to work on ensuringthat the generations,
especially me, behind me, evenin front of me, because we're
still trying of just realizingthat we're worthy, because it
affects even, like what I'mthinking about my generation and
older even going to the doctoradvocating for yourself because
(33:31):
you are worthy of this person'stime and them paying attention
and ensuring you're getting agood checkup or whatever.
And knowing your worth man,like really knowing your worth
is powerful throughout.
Chantée Christian (33:41):
Yeah that's powerful.
And I remember I had gotten abusiness coach and he asked me
how much did I charge for myspeaking engagements?
And I told him and I heard audand I was like hello.
He said I fell off my porchbecause are you kidding me?
(34:04):
And I was like no.
He was like hold on, hold on,hold on.
Let me go pull back up your bio, right?
He said, because maybe I'm theone that's mistaken.
He said because maybe I'm theone that's mistaken.
He was like do you know howmany literal letters you have
behind your name?
I was like I do.
(34:25):
He was like there's no reasonwhy you aren't doing 10 times
this number as your base.
And I was like no one is payingthat type of money.
So I go, they are, I go into my, I go into my chat and people
are like oh yeah, I don't speakfor anything less than a grand.
I don't speak for any.
And I'm like USD, are wetalking about pesos?
(34:47):
Because I'm confused Exceptpesos, hilarious.
And so I had to practice sayingthe number.
Yes, because I was souncomfortable with saying the
number, which I'm like.
Now, if you ask me for aconsulting fee, I don't have no
problem saying that numberbecause I had been saying it for
(35:07):
so long but I hadn't said myspeaker fee or all these things,
and so I was just like peoplepaying that.
Randi B. (35:17):
Right, where are they Sign me up?
Sign me up.
But the thing is is, if youknew your worth, it doesn't even
matter what people are paying,because people will find your
price.
Like, yeah, people could buypurses for $20, but there's
somebody who said my purse isworth $5,000.
Well, and people sure boughtthem.
Chantée Christian (35:34):
Well and buy, and you telling us what do you
want to leave the people with?
Randi B. (35:46):
Oh, I, think I've been saying it, since I've been
running my mouth, that you areworthy.
You're absolutely worthy and tocontinuously your number one job
should be continuously lovingyourself and building up
yourself.
Loving yourself and building upyourself so you feel as if
(36:11):
you're worthy of all the greatthings that this universe has
for you.
And I believe that when we feelas if we're worthy, we are
better for the people around us.
And we talk about spoilingourselves and taking care of
ourselves.
And it's so easy to go get ourhair done and our nails done,
our massages, our buyingourselves something.
That's not the work.
That is not.
(36:33):
That's easy.
The work is inner and findingall the areas where we're
blocked and there are tons, yeah, and just continuously doing
the work.
Because what I am experiencingnow and I'm sad it took me 54
years to get here you know ithas been a constant journey as
more doors are opening, as I amseeing my worth, as I am walking
(36:58):
away from things, as I am inthe biggest struggle I've ever
had right now, business-wise,where someone hasn't done me
right and I've never.
This has never happened to meand they've made some threats to
me and I don't know why I'm socalm, cause I'm like you can
take it, because I'm going toget twice as much later I'll be
(37:21):
fine, and I'm only there nowbecause I have worked on myself
and I believe in myself morethan I did a year ago or five
years ago.
So that's what I would say, andI know it's harder,
particularly for Black women,which is why we should work
harder to get it.
I love that.
Chantée Christian (37:41):
I love that.
And how can people find you onthese social media platforms and
make sure we build up yourlikes and your following?
Randi B. (37:48):
Oh, thank you, I'm Randi B, everybody, and that's
with an I R-A-N-D-I-B.
So on Facebook, I'm Randi B.
On Instagram, I'm Randiunderscore, underscore B.
On TikTok, I'm the Randi B.
I'm moving to fan base TikTok.
I'm having trust issues with itright now.
I don't know how long orforever or whatever.
I'm on all the things, anything.
(38:10):
You're on LinkedIn, I'm RandiBryant.
So, whatever, just go on it.
I'm even on the red note.
Whatever it is, I'm Randi B orsomething.
Just look for.
Chantée Christian (38:17):
Randi B and you'll find me.
Yes, her SEO works wonders.
Oh, it does.
Randi B. (38:23):
It does, it does.
Chantée Christian (38:23):
And oh, it does, it does, it does, it does.
And we will also make sure thatall of your handles and all
those things are in the shownotes.
Randi B. (38:31):
Okay, thank you.
Oh, and truthing cards.
Just real quick Truthing cardsfor Black people to ask.
You know, it's like a game onAmazon.
Those are called truthing, sotruthing I-N-G on truth.
That's also a way you can findme.
Chantée Christian (38:44):
And when do they air on the good TV?
Randi B. (38:47):
Oh, so right now.
My show started about two weeksago and it is called Truthing
on Amazon Prime.
If you go to Amazon Prime rightnow and look up Truthing, you
will see me and listen to theshow.
We have some good topics likecan you be pro-Black and only
date white people?
What does Black mean?
Do we hurt ourselves as Blackpeople by trying to assimilate?
(39:09):
And it's Black people havingthese conversations, these
honest conversations, and doingsome truly.
Chantée Christian (39:14):
Mm-hmm, look at that, look at that, y'all she
on TV.
Y'all she on TV.
No, I thank you so so much foralways saying yes.
You know, I just I trulyappreciate not just the work you
so so much for always sayingyes.
You know, I just I trulyappreciate not just the work you
do, but the re-gifting andreinforcement for the community
(39:36):
and I just appreciate you somuch and thank you.
Randi B. (39:40):
And thank you for seeing me and asking me so I can
say yes and providing theopportunities.
That validates people and meparticularly.
So thank you so much.
Chantée Christian (39:49):
Thank you I enjoy talking with Randi B about
embracing self-worth, livingauthentically and the powerful
journey of self-discovery.
Her insights on navigatingchallenges, building community
and unapologetically claimingour worth are truly inspiring.
(40:09):
Thank you for joining us andremember to stop doing shit that
doesn't serve you.
For more information or ifyou'd like to reach out to us,
visit us at mybestshiftunderscore LLC on Instagram.
See you later.
Popular Podcasts
On Purpose with Jay Shetty
I’m Jay Shetty host of On Purpose the worlds #1 Mental Health podcast and I’m so grateful you found us. I started this podcast 5 years ago to invite you into conversations and workshops that are designed to help make you happier, healthier and more healed. I believe that when you (yes you) feel seen, heard and understood you’re able to deal with relationship struggles, work challenges and life’s ups and downs with more ease and grace. I interview experts, celebrities, thought leaders and athletes so that we can grow our mindset, build better habits and uncover a side of them we’ve never seen before. New episodes every Monday and Friday. Your support means the world to me and I don’t take it for granted — click the follow button and leave a review to help us spread the love with On Purpose. I can’t wait for you to listen to your first or 500th episode!
The Breakfast Club
The World's Most Dangerous Morning Show, The Breakfast Club, With DJ Envy And Charlamagne Tha God!
The Joe Rogan Experience
The official podcast of comedian Joe Rogan.