June 11, 2024 • 28 mins
Text Brian & Shawna (Fan Mail)
Ever wondered if taking a break could be the key to unlocking a healthier, more balanced life? Join us as Mr. & Mrs.KillerB share their personal journey through the challenges of maintaining a live podcast show and balancing life's many responsibilities. We'll discuss how stepping back allowed us to refresh, reevaluate our priorities, and create much-needed margin in our lives. From the types of vacations people enjoy to the importance of humility, we'll reflect on what truly matters and how taking a break can lead to deeper insights.
Stress isn’t always about fear; sometimes, it's about the crushing weight of responsibilities. In this episode, we explore the significant impact of stress on mental health and personal stories from our time off. The conversation takes a heartfelt turn as we unpack the difficulties of dealing with pride, emphasizing the critical role of self-awareness and open communication. We'll recount a personal revelation about pride and stress, illustrating the importance of confronting and growing from personal struggles, even when it's tough to step away from something you love.
From managing household garbage during financial struggles to adapting to new environments, we highlight how adversity can drive personal growth. Practicing gratitude and trusting in a higher purpose beyond financial gain can keep us grounded. We share insights on recognizing a higher purpose, trusting God's timing, and staying humble. Tune in to hear how our experiences have shaped our perspective, and how embracing humility and gratitude can lead to a more fulfilling life.
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Transcript
Episode Transcript
Available transcripts are automatically generated. Complete accuracy is not guaranteed.
Speaker 1 (00:01):
Do you like to talk about, like, what caused you to
choose to take the break?
Speaker 2 (00:06):
Taking a break was actually probably the.
It was one of the hardestthings that I really decided to
do.
We've been doing Killer BeeStudios for two years now and I
could feel the pressure I needto sort things out.
My lesson learned was a littlebit different, I think, a little
bit more personal and I don't Ikind of was going hesitant.
Different, I think, a littlebit more personal, and I kind of
(00:26):
was going hesitant, going backand forth, like do I actually
want to share this at the show?
Welcome to the New Horizonspodcast.
I'm Brian Curie.
Speaker 1 (00:34):
And I'm Shauna Curie, also known as Mr and Mrs Killer
B, in virtual reality.
So this podcast is recordedlive from the metaverse at the
Killer B Studios where real lifestories and God experiences are
shared in a way, only themetaverse at the Killer Bee
Studios, where real life storiesand God experiences are shared
in a way only the metaverse canoffer.
Speaker 2 (00:48):
With that, let's go ahead and dive in to today's
episode.
Oh yeah, it's great to seeeverybody at the Killer Bee
Studios.
Great to be back.
It's been a long time.
Do you like that Great to beback?
Speaker 3 (01:02):
Yeah it's like at the wah-wah button here.
Speaker 2 (01:05):
Yeah, I see that Tonight we're going to talk
about our break.
We're going to talk about ourbreak and redefining our time.
We're going to talk about someawareness that started taking
place in our lives.
We're going to talk aboutmargin and we're going to talk
about a little bit abouthumility.
Did I say that right?
Humility yeah, I a little bitabout humility.
Did I say that right?
Humility yeah, I felt like aroar off tongue wrong.
Speaker 1 (01:26):
It's so sad you doubt yourself so often now, because
I always correct them.
So now he's like is that theright word?
Is that the right word?
Speaker 2 (01:33):
Well, you know, I'm going to ask you guys first, but
let me know, by some confetti,how many of you love taking a
vacation.
Throw some confetti if you lovevacations.
Okay, okay, it looks likemostly everybody.
There's a couple people thatdon't Okay, so I'm going to ask
you this Let me know, bythrowing some confetti, how many
(01:54):
of you in here are beach people, yeah, yeah.
I know we're beach people, okay, all right.
How many of you are outdoorpeople Outdoors?
Speaker 1 (02:03):
Okay yeah, outdoors too, yeah, somewhat, yes, yeah,
I know Breeze is definitelyOutdoor at the beach.
Speaker 2 (02:09):
You can't yeah, You're outdoor at the beach,
Like if we went camping.
She'd be like no, we're notdoing that.
Speaker 1 (02:13):
No, I don't camp.
No, there's lots of reasonsEspecially primitive camping,
though I've heard that's awesome.
I want to try that.
Yes, has anybody been glampingbefore?
Oh man, I really want to dothat the uh okay.
Speaker 2 (02:30):
So let me ask one more how many of you are more
like staycation people?
You just want to stay, likestay around your home area and
hang out there.
I like a good staycation,sometimes too, yeah yeah, well,
it's kind of easy for us becausewe live in florida.
Speaker 1 (02:42):
So yeah, well, we would probably consider a
staycation like stayingliterally at home, which I'm
okay with that too sometimes.
Yeah, that's true.
Speaker 2 (02:51):
Staying in.
Speaker 1 (02:51):
Florida.
That's not too much of asacrifice.
Speaker 2 (02:57):
Okay, so let's start off.
Mrs Killer Bee, let's start offthis topic to talk about.
I want to open up with yousharing with me about.
You know, we took about threemonths.
I guess we're going on aboutthree months on this break right
now, which is a long break.
Some people have asked me ifwe're actually coming back,
because I guess we are comingback, but we've just had so much
(03:17):
stuff going on in life that wereally need to press pause and
evaluate everything that's goingon.
So I'm going to ask you toshare what does taking a break
mean to you?
Speaker 1 (03:28):
You know, brian brought it up to me originally
and it just felt like even theidea of it felt like a cool
drink of water, like, yes, Ilike that idea and I I forgot
how long I've been the co-hostnow.
But I'm different than a lot ofpeople, I think, because I love
(03:50):
people, I love talking topeople.
I think for the most part I'man extrovert, but the older I've
gotten, the more I've realizedthat I need more quiet time,
more alone time, more downtimethan I used to, yeah, and so,
like, sometimes the idea ofdoing a show every Thursday
started to get a little heavyfor me.
(04:11):
And also, as some of you knowor maybe don't know, I've gone
back to work over the last yearand so it's increased over time
and now I'm working five to sixdays a week, which I realized
for a lot of people is no bigdeal, but for me it's taken a
lot of adjustment because I'mjust used to doing what I want
(04:35):
when I want to and in a lot ofways I've built that into my
schedule the best I can.
But still it's taken a lot, of,a lot of adjustment.
So don't think I'm a baby forthat.
It's just been, uh, it's justbeen different for me.
So, anyway, the idea of a breakwas really welcome for me and,
(04:55):
um, as you all know too, likeyou know, brian's been dealing
with health issues, so like allof that has weighed on me too.
So it's given me a chance to,you know, just like take a
breath, like not have as manyobligations, and kind of
reevaluate what I'm doing,what's important, what I really
(05:16):
need to be doing with my time.
Speaker 2 (05:19):
Is there anything particular that really stood out
as something that you learnedduring this break?
Speaker 1 (05:24):
I wouldn't say I have it down, but what I'm starting
to learn, like what this hasallowed me to be able to see, is
how to react more.
What's the right word?
Like react quicker when I'mfeeling, you know, exhausted,
(05:44):
when I'm feeling overwhelmed,like don't let that, keep
building.
That's something I've struggledwith my whole life.
Is I just let things build,build, build, build, build, and
then I can't take it anymore.
So I'm through this quiet time.
It has allowed me to, likerecognize it faster and do
something about it you know likedeal with that quicker and not
(06:05):
let it build, Because you knowhow it is.
I mean, have any of you dealtwith this before, where you let
things build, let things buildand then you explode and then
it's terrible, Like you have,you know, conflicts with your
loved ones and you're exhaustedand you know all of that.
I don't want to do that.
I mean nobody wants to do that,but I've always struggled with
(06:28):
that and so I just want to, youknow, catch that early, deal
with things early, so that Idon't get to the place where
then it's a whole big thing.
Speaker 2 (06:37):
Yeah, does anybody else?
Can anybody else relate to thatat all?
Yeah, yeah, learning this.
What are some of the signs thatyou notice in yourself and with
that also, what are some of thethings you're, you're putting
in place to kind of be moreaware of that?
You know I'm going to like fallapart.
That's what I start to feel.
Speaker 1 (06:53):
Like you know I would say it feels like higher
anxiety.
I would say it feels likeexhaustion.
It feels like I feel like I'msnapping at you or Ashton or
(07:17):
whoever you know is talking tome.
Like you know, my patience islower, so that's how I recognize
it and the things I'm puttingin place is like being willing
to say I need a couple minutes,I need to go by you, by myself.
Like just a little bit ago Ikind of felt like feeling a
little bit of anxiety so I saidI'm gonna go take a bath, like
(07:39):
just like taking myself out ofthe situation even for a couple
minutes can help a lot, you know, and it's not that anyone's
doing anything that's annoyingme, it's just that you know
things start to pile on and ifyou don't take a minute to
decompress, then that's when youget in a situation you don't
want to be in, you know treatpeople you love in a way you
(07:59):
don't want to treat them.
Speaker 2 (08:00):
I don't know if anybody else here can relate to
it.
If you guys have any, if you'vedealt with that, what are some
of the signs you guys kind ofnoticed, maybe in your own life
too?
If you guys think of somethingyou know, let us know if you'd
like to share, because I thinkthis helps us all, cause I think
we all can feel that pressureat times, that life's just
really getting heavy, there's alot going on and you need to
break, you need to need to getsome space, but sometimes we
(08:23):
don't feel like we can say thatuh, sometimes I mean even
sometimes when mrs killer btells me that she wants to take
a break, it might, you know, Imight take it as I've upset her
some way, and it's like tryingto have that communication open
to understand that, hey, I needa break from it isn't a bad
thing.
And they tell me all the timethey need a break from me.
(08:44):
So, but whatever, I make themlaugh so hard.
Speaker 1 (08:50):
Well, brian, what are some ways that you like?
How do you notice when you'regetting overwhelmed?
Speaker 2 (08:56):
I think that I think I can feel.
You know, I never reallythought of it as stress before,
because stress, I don't know,for some reason in my mind I put
stress into the category of,like, I'm afraid of something.
Speaker 1 (09:09):
Oh, interesting.
Speaker 2 (09:10):
But that's like, so, like if people would say like I
think you might be dealing withstress.
Well, you said that before Isaid it today.
Yeah, you said it today.
And what did I say back to youtoday?
Speaker 1 (09:21):
You said I'm not feeling stressed.
Speaker 2 (09:24):
No.
I said no, I guess I could be.
I could have been feelingstressed.
See, she wasn't listening.
I actually said I was.
Speaker 1 (09:29):
I just forgot what you said.
Speaker 2 (09:31):
Because I had to think about it.
At first I did say no, I'm notstressed, and I was like maybe I
was because of things happening.
I'm like, okay, I have torecategorize where stress is.
It doesn't really mean I'mafraid of something, but there's
a lot of pressure and thatstarts building anxiety and
stuff too, and I'm like you knowwhat, maybe it was stress.
So I had to start learning that.
(09:52):
I think that's probably a bigone.
But feeling like I can't breathe, like almost feeling like, ok,
I've got so much stuff going on,I feel like I'm running back
and forth trying to makeeverything happen, and that's
some of the things I startedlearning during our break was I
don't need to make all thisstuff happen, like I need to
really just step back and letthe right things happen.
(10:13):
And if even if I think it's theright thing, if it's not
happening, that's all right,because it's not the right thing
for right now.
If it was, it would just besomething else.
Yeah, so understanding how todo that and then also unplugging
and being able to let my bodyrest some from all the stuff
that we're doing.
You know, when we talked abouttaking the break, we thought we
(10:35):
did not expect that, that theshow would be the hardest thing
for us not to want to jump, tojump back in.
I think it was like the nextweek or two weeks later.
We're like man, we really missbeing there and doing the show
and talking to people andconnecting.
But we knew if we just jumpedback in we weren't helping the
situation.
Speaker 1 (10:53):
So would you like to talk about, like, what caused
you to choose to take the break?
Speaker 2 (10:58):
yeah, I could definitely do.
Yeah, taking a break wasactually probably the I think
I've already said this it wasone of the hardest things that I
really decided to do.
We've been doing Killer BeeStudios for two years now.
When I knew I needed to take abreak from everything, this was
the last thing that I washolding on to.
I was like, no, I don't want todo that.
But I also knew that there was alot of stuff happening and I
(11:20):
could feel the pressure andthere's a lot of preparation
that goes in when we have gueststhat we bring in and we have to
prepare.
Diener probably knows that too.
Diener's hosting her own shownow, creator Spotlight and
there's a lot of preparationthat goes into it.
And then working with yourguests and I was like I just
need a break from that andreally it.
(11:54):
And I was like I just need abreak from that and really it's
just because I needed time withyou guys too.
I need to sort things out andnot feel the pressure.
I have to be back in there todo the show.
And I think that's probably thebiggest thing, biggest reason
show, because I love this showand we love I mean we get
stories of people whose liveshave been impacted from the
stuff we're talking about, thatwe're thinking about suicide and
we're struggling withaddictions.
I mean, those are things it'shard to walk away from if you
know that kind of impact'shappening.
Just because I loved it, I hadto press pause on it for my
(12:18):
health and and for us as afamily.
There's things that we'researching and wanted to get
answers on as well.
So, if you think about thethings that you learned, my
lesson learned was a little bitdifferent, I think, a little bit
more personal, and I don't Ikind of was going hesitant,
(12:38):
going back and forth, like, do Iactually want to share this at
the show?
But that's what this is about,that this show, the New Horizons
podcast, is all about sharingour real life experiences and
being real with each other, andmy lesson I learned actually
just happened, probably only afew days ago, maybe two or three
days ago, and Mrs Killer Beedidn't even know it until I
(13:00):
mentioned it to her today that Imight be struggling with a
pride issue.
That was something that I hadto recognize and and the way, I
don't know if has anybody hereever struggled with pride before
?
Has anybody here?
Yeah, it's not something that'sreally something that you
really want to talk about.
It's not something that youreally want to receive when
(13:21):
someone tells you that you mightbe dealing with a pride issue.
And that's kind of the way ithappened.
We're just back from vacation.
Something was something juststarted frustrating me and I
said something.
I said something to Mrs KillerBee and she told me she's like I
think you're dealing with prideand I'm like, of course, I'm
like I didn't want to hear that.
(13:42):
I don't.
That's the last thing I want tohear, cause I don't want to be
someone that struggles withpride.
But then I knew that she wasalso.
She was on to something, shewas touching something.
I'm like, if it, if it is thatsensitive, if she says that,
then there's definitely a,there's something there that's a
problem that has to be takencare of.
I asked I want to ask you,shauna or Mrs Killer B what were
(14:05):
their sign?
What was the sign to you thatsaid, hey, he's dealing with a
pride issue.
And what did it take?
Was it easy for you to tell methat?
It felt like to me?
It was easy for her to tell me.
It was not hard for me to tellyou because I knew it, I knew it
, I knew it see, no, because Ithought it was so obvious that I
(14:28):
didn't think it would be asurprise to you.
Speaker 1 (14:31):
But, um, the way I could tell was that little
things were just driving younuts like things were like
bothering you on such a deeplevel where it was something
where I was like, why is thatbothering you?
It's not a big deal, you know.
And so when I mentioned it toyou I didn't think it was even
(14:52):
going to be a big deal.
I was just like clearly healready knows that this is
what's bothering him, but Ididn't know it would be like a
surprise to you or something youhadn't already realized.
Speaker 2 (15:02):
Yeah, If anybody has a comment or a thought or a
question, feel free to let usknow.
We'll bring you up LostVirtually.
How are you doing?
It's great?
Speaker 3 (15:08):
to see you, man.
Good to see you Besides mypride issue.
Speaker 2 (15:12):
I'm doing pretty good .
Well all you need to overcomepride is a good memory, Thanks,
Virtually what I'm learning ispride can be.
It starts off as a thought, butthen it can start turning into
different actions, Absolutely.
And you know, mine or my pridewas starting in a thought, but
(15:34):
you started seeing it coming outverbally and becoming a problem
and it's great to have peopleclose to you that can speak into
that in your life.
So you helped me become moreaware of that and that helps me
begin the process of movingbeyond that as well.
Speaker 1 (15:48):
You know, it's a beautiful thing that you
mentioned that, because you knowit happens to everybody where
you're struggling with something, but sometimes you don't even
recognize the how it's affectingyour actions until someone
close to you shares that withyou.
And, like I said, when Ibrought that up to Brian I
didn't even realize that wasgoing to be a big deal to him,
(16:10):
you know.
So it's good to like be gentlewhen you're talking to your
loved ones about what they mightbe struggling with.
Um, I'm not always great atthat.
Um, I like tend to either avoidsomething for so long that you
know it becomes a problem, orI'm too forceful and then that
becomes a problem.
I'm not good in the middle, soI'm going to work on getting
better at that.
(16:31):
But yeah, it's hard Sometimes.
It's hard to understand yourown really your own sin patterns
.
It's hard until someone helpsyou recognize, you know, how
you're reacting to things, stufflike that.
Speaker 2 (16:45):
It's kind of like with, you know, with Arcane,
when he was young.
We talked about there was atime in our life it was when I
lost my job during the economycrash in 2010.
And we we couldn't afford tohave garbage picked up at the
house and what we did was wewould put all our garbage in our
garage and then the church thatwe were serving at a church
what we do is we'd load up thatwhole truck and the church told
us you can put your trash in ourdumpster.
(17:07):
So I was embarrassed by it.
So I would put all the trash inthe garage until it got so bad
that we had to put it in thetruck and drive down and dump it
.
And, of course, I'd do it atnighttime.
And one thing I learned is Iwas talking to our cans.
Like you know, there's things inour life that we all kind of
carry our own baggage and wekind of throw that baggage and
(17:29):
we hide it somewhere, but thatbaggage isn't something that
we're supposed to continue tokeep and hold onto.
But the thing is, is you keeppiling it up?
It's going to start stinkingand that's where it got to the
point where I'm like I have togo get rid of the trash because
it smells out there and I'mgoing to have to just own up to
this situation and go dump this,even though it hurt my ego a
little bit.
(17:49):
But it was a great opportunityto kind of show and teach them
about how we got to deal withthat stuff before it starts
stinking, because it'll startaffecting other people around us
and they'll start smelling thestink, and what's sometimes bad
is we don't end up smelling ourown stink because we're used to
(18:11):
being in it.
Speaker 1 (18:11):
What's that commercial?
You go nose blind.
Speaker 2 (18:12):
Yeah, nose blind.
That's a new one.
I've never heard that.
Speaker 1 (18:14):
Spiritually nose blind.
Speaker 2 (18:15):
Wow, that's a new one , that's a new one.
Well, another thing I wrotedown was, I think that one of
the things because I made somenotes on trying to help, how to
help myself in this, this areatoo and one of the things I
wrote down was evaluating mymotivations, like what's
motivating me, what's motivatingthis to like, why do I feel
this way at this time?
(18:36):
Why do I need to be the onethat is always right, or I need
to be the one that's recognized,or I need to be the one that is
always right, or I need to bethe one that's recognized, or I
need to be the one, like I hadto start asking those questions
internally and say, hey, what,what is my motives here, and if
those motives aren't good, thatthat needs to change.
So that was something I wrotedown.
(18:57):
And then I guess, also practiceand humility, like being able
to listen, like more actually,just not to have to always have
the input to say, but listen andadmit my mistakes, like I
probably shouldn't.
You're right, when that personcut me off and I had had enough,
it really wasn't that big of adeal, but big of a deal, but I
made a big deal.
And if I really thought aboutit, I could feel I don't know if
(19:19):
you guys can this, but likewhen they cut me off, I could
feel like the tension in my bodylike tensioning up.
You guys want to hear a funnystory about drivers in Florida?
You guys want to hear it?
Throw some confetti if you guyswant to hear a funny story
about drivers in Florida.
Okay, all right.
So when we first moved toFlorida in 2013, we served at a
church out here and what wasinteresting was we moved to
(19:39):
Florida and everybody's so great, they're so nice.
You go in the restaurants, theywant to sit down and just talk
to you.
It's like the waiter orwaitress and they just spend
hours talking to you instead ofworking.
I'm like what the heck?
Everybody closed down at threebecause it's like oh, we've had
a long day, we gotta go,probably to the beach or
something great people.
Until they get in their carsand I told this to a the group
of the church.
(20:00):
I was like you guys, everybodyhere is great.
You guys are like oh, we loveyou, you're great people.
Then you get in your cars andyou guys turn into like little
demons and you guys are likehonking your horn, like before
the light even turns green, likewe had one person give us a
middle finger.
Because, I mean, I don't know,they gave us the middle finger
driving behind us and becausethey didn't like how slow we
were going.
(20:20):
And then they pulled up next tous at the light and I'm like,
oh great.
And they're like like this.
I'm like, oh okay, I'm like I'mgonna lose it.
They rolled, I wrote in mywindow.
I'm like, uh, your hood's openbecause we had our hood was
bungee cord closed because thehood latch was shut.
I'm like, oh, you're so nice,but you gave me, like, the
middle finger and riding mybumper all the way up here.
You want to bring up the Q&Amic there, arcane.
Speaker 3 (20:43):
Good to see y'all.
I just had to put my hand up asa native Floridian and say I'm
not just going to sit up hereand listen to y'all bash us as
drivers.
Okay, Perhaps it's the ones whodidn't you moved here that
maybe have the issue.
No, we can't.
Speaker 2 (21:04):
I will say after we got a big problem was we kept
our Ohio plates for a long time.
Once we got rid of that, it gotmuch better so yeah, I think
there's some.
Speaker 1 (21:14):
They're like get out of here tourists.
Speaker 2 (21:18):
They call them the snowbirds, like snowbirds, get
out of here.
Speaker 3 (21:22):
You make our traffic terrible, not when you live here
they call them the snowbirds.
Speaker 2 (21:22):
Like snowbirds, get out of here you make our traffic
terrible.
I know we're one of thosepeople now.
Speaker 3 (21:27):
But okay, so y'all, we got y'all.
Speaker 2 (21:29):
That's all.
But.
Speaker 3 (21:31):
I just wanted to say this is a good topic.
When I saw the inbox comethrough and just you know that
you all were kind of launchingagain or coming out of a break,
I mean it was just reallyrefreshing to see that we had a
Bible study yesterday thattalked about how much faith it
takes just to be and not to bebusy.
Speaker 2 (21:54):
You know, what I mean .
Speaker 3 (21:55):
So I think, that this is really in line with the
messaging that God is trying toget to all of us, like, even
when I saw the message, I'm like, yeah, I got to do this, this
and this, but it was just likewhy don't you just be and maybe
understand that this issomething you might need instead
?
Of acquiring all the time, kindof receiving what God has.
(22:17):
So I just wanted to celebrateboth of you and sharing your
truth.
But it is.
Speaker 2 (22:24):
It is very, very much in the vein is what I want to
say so yeah, thank you Michelle,thank you, thank you I feel
like we're learning about.
Speaker 1 (22:35):
you know, it's so against the culture to slow down
, and I mean I I'm certainly notthe first person to point that
out that's something I feel likeeveryone's talking about right
now.
But it's so hard to do.
It's so hard to make yourselfjust slow down and be I like
that way of putting it just be,you know, and especially if you
(22:57):
feel like you're getting killerB.
Yes.
Speaker 2 (23:01):
Okay.
Speaker 1 (23:03):
I actually kind of like that so yes.
I think that's something I'mlearning now that I'm back to
work.
I'm I used to think like that'snot something I struggle with.
I don't want to go, go, go.
But now that I'm working again,I see how that is such a trap,
because there's always morethings to do and there's only so
(23:24):
much time.
So I get it now.
I'm sorry that.
I always thought you know, youall were too busy.
No, not you people in general,but just people in the world.
Speaker 2 (23:33):
One of the other things that I wrote on here I
don't I only have like one, likea couple more things to kind of
talk about, because I don'twant to keep people here too
late but the other thing I wrotedown was to focus on personal
growth, my own personal growthand I mean that by like they set
my own personal goals and stopcomparing myself to others.
Like I'm like if pride becomesan issue, it's usually because
(23:56):
you're comparing yourself tosomebody else, and I was like
I've got to be careful that I'mnot doing that and and be okay,
like set goals for that.
Challenge me and my ownpersonal growth instead of
worrying about other people.
And then I wrote this down toactually celebrate those people.
yeah, that's great I'm like butthat's it's great, but you know
(24:17):
it's not easy if you're dealingwith pride, so, uh, but it's
definitely something.
I think that if I can't do that, then there's a problem.
I got to be like there shouldbe red flags, like hey,
something, be careful here.
But when I was out here,someone was talking to me and
they said the thing of and maybesome people here might be able
to relate to it, but it wasn'tas touchy this time, but I was
(24:38):
aware of it because of of thisprocess that I'm going through
now and someone said you guysare monetized, right, and again,
we've been in here for twoyears working hard and have
invested money, real money, intohelping to build what we're
doing in here and connectingpeople, and with that, god has
(24:59):
blessed us for that.
But then that little thing aboutbeing monetized hung over my
head and I'm like why aren't wemonetized?
There's so much more we coulddo and it would really get to me
.
And then this time, when thisperson brought it up and they
were so shocked, I'm like, yeah,I found myself going down the
path.
I was like I know everybody'sshocked that we're not.
I was like I don't understandeither.
But then I was like you knowwhat?
This isn't going anywhere good,except for it's going to
(25:21):
resurface up pride.
And so I changed the subject.
I don't want to stay there,because this is not healthy.
And it doesn't matter if we'remonetized, because when we meet
with people they're like well,what are you guys doing in the
metaverse?
Isn't it just a game?
We've all heard that, and now Ihave messages saved on my phone
that I'm showing them.
Like this is a message came inright here and I can share this
(25:42):
in here because this was publicon social media.
I was like but before we wenton a break, I got a message from
somebody on social media on apublic post that said that they
were, they came here and thatthe killer B studios saved their
entire family.
Like they were already thatnight they were going to go home
and burn down their house andkill.
I think they had three kids,their wife and, I think, two
(26:04):
dogs or something like that, butit was like a total of seven
people.
But they came in here and heardsomebody's story and it wasn't
us, it was somebody else.
That story was up here beingshared and it connected to them
and it changed the direction oftheir life.
I'm like that is a betterpayoff than any monetization
that you can get in here.
Absolutely it's impacting livesand that's something I had to
(26:26):
remind myself.
So, being aware of those thingsand then also practicing, the
last thing I had was practicinggratitude, you know, taking time
and remembering and thankingGod for the things that he has
done.
When I thought about that, evenwith the studios and in our
life, things like we all aregoing to have seasons that are
up like we're up on top of themountain.
(26:47):
There's a lot of times weremember the seasons that we're
down in the valley though morethan anything, especially when
we're down in the valley.
But to take and press pause andremember all the things that
God has done for us, that keepsour mind in a gratitude zone
that we can remember and trustGod and helps prevent us to stay
away from that pride.
Speaker 1 (27:06):
I was just going to say, just to take that one step
further, as you know, likespecifically about the
monetization thing.
You know, I like to think likethere's clearly a reason why
that hasn't happened and that'sbest for us, for what we're
doing here for now.
You know, maybe it'll happen inthe future, maybe not, but no
(27:27):
matter what, there's got to be areason why that's not happening
.
You know, god's got it undercontrol and he's brought us this
far, like if he wants us tokeep going, that's going to
happen, Amen.
Speaker 2 (27:38):
And if we're doing it to be monetized, then are we
doing it for the right reason.
If you enjoyed this episodedon't forget.
Do you like to talk about, like, what caused you to
choose to take the break?
Speaker 2 (00:06):
Taking a break was actually probably the.
It was one of the hardestthings that I really decided to
do.
We've been doing Killer BeeStudios for two years now and I
could feel the pressure I needto sort things out.
My lesson learned was a littlebit different, I think, a little
bit more personal and I don't Ikind of was going hesitant.
Different, I think, a littlebit more personal, and I kind of
(00:26):
was going hesitant, going backand forth, like do I actually
want to share this at the show?
Welcome to the New Horizonspodcast.
I'm Brian Curie.
Speaker 1 (00:34):
And I'm Shauna Curie, also known as Mr and Mrs Killer
B, in virtual reality.
So this podcast is recordedlive from the metaverse at the
Killer B Studios where real lifestories and God experiences are
shared in a way, only themetaverse at the Killer Bee
Studios, where real life storiesand God experiences are shared
in a way only the metaverse canoffer.
Speaker 2 (00:48):
With that, let's go ahead and dive in to today's
episode.
Oh yeah, it's great to seeeverybody at the Killer Bee
Studios.
Great to be back.
It's been a long time.
Do you like that Great to beback?
Speaker 3 (01:02):
Yeah it's like at the wah-wah button here.
Speaker 2 (01:05):
Yeah, I see that Tonight we're going to talk
about our break.
We're going to talk about ourbreak and redefining our time.
We're going to talk about someawareness that started taking
place in our lives.
We're going to talk aboutmargin and we're going to talk
about a little bit abouthumility.
Did I say that right?
Humility yeah, I a little bitabout humility.
Did I say that right?
Humility yeah, I felt like aroar off tongue wrong.
Speaker 1 (01:26):
It's so sad you doubt yourself so often now, because
I always correct them.
So now he's like is that theright word?
Is that the right word?
Speaker 2 (01:33):
Well, you know, I'm going to ask you guys first, but
let me know, by some confetti,how many of you love taking a
vacation.
Throw some confetti if you lovevacations.
Okay, okay, it looks likemostly everybody.
There's a couple people thatdon't Okay, so I'm going to ask
you this Let me know, bythrowing some confetti, how many
(01:54):
of you in here are beach people, yeah, yeah.
I know we're beach people, okay, all right.
How many of you are outdoorpeople Outdoors?
Speaker 1 (02:03):
Okay yeah, outdoors too, yeah, somewhat, yes, yeah,
I know Breeze is definitelyOutdoor at the beach.
Speaker 2 (02:09):
You can't yeah, You're outdoor at the beach,
Like if we went camping.
She'd be like no, we're notdoing that.
Speaker 1 (02:13):
No, I don't camp.
No, there's lots of reasonsEspecially primitive camping,
though I've heard that's awesome.
I want to try that.
Yes, has anybody been glampingbefore?
Oh man, I really want to dothat the uh okay.
Speaker 2 (02:30):
So let me ask one more how many of you are more
like staycation people?
You just want to stay, likestay around your home area and
hang out there.
I like a good staycation,sometimes too, yeah yeah, well,
it's kind of easy for us becausewe live in florida.
Speaker 1 (02:42):
So yeah, well, we would probably consider a
staycation like stayingliterally at home, which I'm
okay with that too sometimes.
Yeah, that's true.
Speaker 2 (02:51):
Staying in.
Speaker 1 (02:51):
Florida.
That's not too much of asacrifice.
Speaker 2 (02:57):
Okay, so let's start off.
Mrs Killer Bee, let's start offthis topic to talk about.
I want to open up with yousharing with me about.
You know, we took about threemonths.
I guess we're going on aboutthree months on this break right
now, which is a long break.
Some people have asked me ifwe're actually coming back,
because I guess we are comingback, but we've just had so much
(03:17):
stuff going on in life that wereally need to press pause and
evaluate everything that's goingon.
So I'm going to ask you toshare what does taking a break
mean to you?
Speaker 1 (03:28):
You know, brian brought it up to me originally
and it just felt like even theidea of it felt like a cool
drink of water, like, yes, Ilike that idea and I I forgot
how long I've been the co-hostnow.
But I'm different than a lot ofpeople, I think, because I love
(03:50):
people, I love talking topeople.
I think for the most part I'man extrovert, but the older I've
gotten, the more I've realizedthat I need more quiet time,
more alone time, more downtimethan I used to, yeah, and so,
like, sometimes the idea ofdoing a show every Thursday
started to get a little heavyfor me.
(04:11):
And also, as some of you knowor maybe don't know, I've gone
back to work over the last yearand so it's increased over time
and now I'm working five to sixdays a week, which I realized
for a lot of people is no bigdeal, but for me it's taken a
lot of adjustment because I'mjust used to doing what I want
(04:35):
when I want to and in a lot ofways I've built that into my
schedule the best I can.
But still it's taken a lot, of,a lot of adjustment.
So don't think I'm a baby forthat.
It's just been, uh, it's justbeen different for me.
So, anyway, the idea of a breakwas really welcome for me and,
(04:55):
um, as you all know too, likeyou know, brian's been dealing
with health issues, so like allof that has weighed on me too.
So it's given me a chance to,you know, just like take a
breath, like not have as manyobligations, and kind of
reevaluate what I'm doing,what's important, what I really
(05:16):
need to be doing with my time.
Speaker 2 (05:19):
Is there anything particular that really stood out
as something that you learnedduring this break?
Speaker 1 (05:24):
I wouldn't say I have it down, but what I'm starting
to learn, like what this hasallowed me to be able to see, is
how to react more.
What's the right word?
Like react quicker when I'mfeeling, you know, exhausted,
(05:44):
when I'm feeling overwhelmed,like don't let that, keep
building.
That's something I've struggledwith my whole life.
Is I just let things build,build, build, build, build, and
then I can't take it anymore.
So I'm through this quiet time.
It has allowed me to, likerecognize it faster and do
something about it you know likedeal with that quicker and not
(06:05):
let it build, Because you knowhow it is.
I mean, have any of you dealtwith this before, where you let
things build, let things buildand then you explode and then
it's terrible, Like you have,you know, conflicts with your
loved ones and you're exhaustedand you know all of that.
I don't want to do that.
I mean nobody wants to do that,but I've always struggled with
(06:28):
that and so I just want to, youknow, catch that early, deal
with things early, so that Idon't get to the place where
then it's a whole big thing.
Speaker 2 (06:37):
Yeah, does anybody else?
Can anybody else relate to thatat all?
Yeah, yeah, learning this.
What are some of the signs thatyou notice in yourself and with
that also, what are some of thethings you're, you're putting
in place to kind of be moreaware of that?
You know I'm going to like fallapart.
That's what I start to feel.
Speaker 1 (06:53):
Like you know I would say it feels like higher
anxiety.
I would say it feels likeexhaustion.
It feels like I feel like I'msnapping at you or Ashton or
(07:17):
whoever you know is talking tome.
Like you know, my patience islower, so that's how I recognize
it and the things I'm puttingin place is like being willing
to say I need a couple minutes,I need to go by you, by myself.
Like just a little bit ago Ikind of felt like feeling a
little bit of anxiety so I saidI'm gonna go take a bath, like
(07:39):
just like taking myself out ofthe situation even for a couple
minutes can help a lot, you know, and it's not that anyone's
doing anything that's annoyingme, it's just that you know
things start to pile on and ifyou don't take a minute to
decompress, then that's when youget in a situation you don't
want to be in, you know treatpeople you love in a way you
(07:59):
don't want to treat them.
Speaker 2 (08:00):
I don't know if anybody else here can relate to
it.
If you guys have any, if you'vedealt with that, what are some
of the signs you guys kind ofnoticed, maybe in your own life
too?
If you guys think of somethingyou know, let us know if you'd
like to share, because I thinkthis helps us all, cause I think
we all can feel that pressureat times, that life's just
really getting heavy, there's alot going on and you need to
break, you need to need to getsome space, but sometimes we
(08:23):
don't feel like we can say thatuh, sometimes I mean even
sometimes when mrs killer btells me that she wants to take
a break, it might, you know, Imight take it as I've upset her
some way, and it's like tryingto have that communication open
to understand that, hey, I needa break from it isn't a bad
thing.
And they tell me all the timethey need a break from me.
(08:44):
So, but whatever, I make themlaugh so hard.
Speaker 1 (08:50):
Well, brian, what are some ways that you like?
How do you notice when you'regetting overwhelmed?
Speaker 2 (08:56):
I think that I think I can feel.
You know, I never reallythought of it as stress before,
because stress, I don't know,for some reason in my mind I put
stress into the category of,like, I'm afraid of something.
Speaker 1 (09:09):
Oh, interesting.
Speaker 2 (09:10):
But that's like, so, like if people would say like I
think you might be dealing withstress.
Well, you said that before Isaid it today.
Yeah, you said it today.
And what did I say back to youtoday?
Speaker 1 (09:21):
You said I'm not feeling stressed.
Speaker 2 (09:24):
No.
I said no, I guess I could be.
I could have been feelingstressed.
See, she wasn't listening.
I actually said I was.
Speaker 1 (09:29):
I just forgot what you said.
Speaker 2 (09:31):
Because I had to think about it.
At first I did say no, I'm notstressed, and I was like maybe I
was because of things happening.
I'm like, okay, I have torecategorize where stress is.
It doesn't really mean I'mafraid of something, but there's
a lot of pressure and thatstarts building anxiety and
stuff too, and I'm like you knowwhat, maybe it was stress.
So I had to start learning that.
(09:52):
I think that's probably a bigone.
But feeling like I can't breathe, like almost feeling like, ok,
I've got so much stuff going on,I feel like I'm running back
and forth trying to makeeverything happen, and that's
some of the things I startedlearning during our break was I
don't need to make all thisstuff happen, like I need to
really just step back and letthe right things happen.
(10:13):
And if even if I think it's theright thing, if it's not
happening, that's all right,because it's not the right thing
for right now.
If it was, it would just besomething else.
Yeah, so understanding how todo that and then also unplugging
and being able to let my bodyrest some from all the stuff
that we're doing.
You know, when we talked abouttaking the break, we thought we
(10:35):
did not expect that, that theshow would be the hardest thing
for us not to want to jump, tojump back in.
I think it was like the nextweek or two weeks later.
We're like man, we really missbeing there and doing the show
and talking to people andconnecting.
But we knew if we just jumpedback in we weren't helping the
situation.
Speaker 1 (10:53):
So would you like to talk about, like, what caused
you to choose to take the break?
Speaker 2 (10:58):
yeah, I could definitely do.
Yeah, taking a break wasactually probably the I think
I've already said this it wasone of the hardest things that I
really decided to do.
We've been doing Killer BeeStudios for two years now.
When I knew I needed to take abreak from everything, this was
the last thing that I washolding on to.
I was like, no, I don't want todo that.
But I also knew that there was alot of stuff happening and I
(11:20):
could feel the pressure andthere's a lot of preparation
that goes in when we have gueststhat we bring in and we have to
prepare.
Diener probably knows that too.
Diener's hosting her own shownow, creator Spotlight and
there's a lot of preparationthat goes into it.
And then working with yourguests and I was like I just
need a break from that andreally it.
(11:54):
And I was like I just need abreak from that and really it's
just because I needed time withyou guys too.
I need to sort things out andnot feel the pressure.
I have to be back in there todo the show.
And I think that's probably thebiggest thing, biggest reason
show, because I love this showand we love I mean we get
stories of people whose liveshave been impacted from the
stuff we're talking about, thatwe're thinking about suicide and
we're struggling withaddictions.
I mean, those are things it'shard to walk away from if you
know that kind of impact'shappening.
Just because I loved it, I hadto press pause on it for my
(12:18):
health and and for us as afamily.
There's things that we'researching and wanted to get
answers on as well.
So, if you think about thethings that you learned, my
lesson learned was a little bitdifferent, I think, a little bit
more personal, and I don't Ikind of was going hesitant,
(12:38):
going back and forth, like, do Iactually want to share this at
the show?
But that's what this is about,that this show, the New Horizons
podcast, is all about sharingour real life experiences and
being real with each other, andmy lesson I learned actually
just happened, probably only afew days ago, maybe two or three
days ago, and Mrs Killer Beedidn't even know it until I
(13:00):
mentioned it to her today that Imight be struggling with a
pride issue.
That was something that I hadto recognize and and the way, I
don't know if has anybody hereever struggled with pride before
?
Has anybody here?
Yeah, it's not something that'sreally something that you
really want to talk about.
It's not something that youreally want to receive when
(13:21):
someone tells you that you mightbe dealing with a pride issue.
And that's kind of the way ithappened.
We're just back from vacation.
Something was something juststarted frustrating me and I
said something.
I said something to Mrs KillerBee and she told me she's like I
think you're dealing with prideand I'm like, of course, I'm
like I didn't want to hear that.
(13:42):
I don't.
That's the last thing I want tohear, cause I don't want to be
someone that struggles withpride.
But then I knew that she wasalso.
She was on to something, shewas touching something.
I'm like, if it, if it is thatsensitive, if she says that,
then there's definitely a,there's something there that's a
problem that has to be takencare of.
I asked I want to ask you,shauna or Mrs Killer B what were
(14:05):
their sign?
What was the sign to you thatsaid, hey, he's dealing with a
pride issue.
And what did it take?
Was it easy for you to tell methat?
It felt like to me?
It was easy for her to tell me.
It was not hard for me to tellyou because I knew it, I knew it
, I knew it see, no, because Ithought it was so obvious that I
(14:28):
didn't think it would be asurprise to you.
Speaker 1 (14:31):
But, um, the way I could tell was that little
things were just driving younuts like things were like
bothering you on such a deeplevel where it was something
where I was like, why is thatbothering you?
It's not a big deal, you know.
And so when I mentioned it toyou I didn't think it was even
(14:52):
going to be a big deal.
I was just like clearly healready knows that this is
what's bothering him, but Ididn't know it would be like a
surprise to you or something youhadn't already realized.
Speaker 2 (15:02):
Yeah, If anybody has a comment or a thought or a
question, feel free to let usknow.
We'll bring you up LostVirtually.
How are you doing?
It's great?
Speaker 3 (15:08):
to see you, man.
Good to see you Besides mypride issue.
Speaker 2 (15:12):
I'm doing pretty good .
Well all you need to overcomepride is a good memory, Thanks,
Virtually what I'm learning ispride can be.
It starts off as a thought, butthen it can start turning into
different actions, Absolutely.
And you know, mine or my pridewas starting in a thought, but
(15:34):
you started seeing it coming outverbally and becoming a problem
and it's great to have peopleclose to you that can speak into
that in your life.
So you helped me become moreaware of that and that helps me
begin the process of movingbeyond that as well.
Speaker 1 (15:48):
You know, it's a beautiful thing that you
mentioned that, because you knowit happens to everybody where
you're struggling with something, but sometimes you don't even
recognize the how it's affectingyour actions until someone
close to you shares that withyou.
And, like I said, when Ibrought that up to Brian I
didn't even realize that wasgoing to be a big deal to him,
(16:10):
you know.
So it's good to like be gentlewhen you're talking to your
loved ones about what they mightbe struggling with.
Um, I'm not always great atthat.
Um, I like tend to either avoidsomething for so long that you
know it becomes a problem, orI'm too forceful and then that
becomes a problem.
I'm not good in the middle, soI'm going to work on getting
better at that.
(16:31):
But yeah, it's hard Sometimes.
It's hard to understand yourown really your own sin patterns
.
It's hard until someone helpsyou recognize, you know, how
you're reacting to things, stufflike that.
Speaker 2 (16:45):
It's kind of like with, you know, with Arcane,
when he was young.
We talked about there was atime in our life it was when I
lost my job during the economycrash in 2010.
And we we couldn't afford tohave garbage picked up at the
house and what we did was wewould put all our garbage in our
garage and then the church thatwe were serving at a church
what we do is we'd load up thatwhole truck and the church told
us you can put your trash in ourdumpster.
(17:07):
So I was embarrassed by it.
So I would put all the trash inthe garage until it got so bad
that we had to put it in thetruck and drive down and dump it
.
And, of course, I'd do it atnighttime.
And one thing I learned is Iwas talking to our cans.
Like you know, there's things inour life that we all kind of
carry our own baggage and wekind of throw that baggage and
(17:29):
we hide it somewhere, but thatbaggage isn't something that
we're supposed to continue tokeep and hold onto.
But the thing is, is you keeppiling it up?
It's going to start stinkingand that's where it got to the
point where I'm like I have togo get rid of the trash because
it smells out there and I'mgoing to have to just own up to
this situation and go dump this,even though it hurt my ego a
little bit.
(17:49):
But it was a great opportunityto kind of show and teach them
about how we got to deal withthat stuff before it starts
stinking, because it'll startaffecting other people around us
and they'll start smelling thestink, and what's sometimes bad
is we don't end up smelling ourown stink because we're used to
(18:11):
being in it.
Speaker 1 (18:11):
What's that commercial?
You go nose blind.
Speaker 2 (18:12):
Yeah, nose blind.
That's a new one.
I've never heard that.
Speaker 1 (18:14):
Spiritually nose blind.
Speaker 2 (18:15):
Wow, that's a new one , that's a new one.
Well, another thing I wrotedown was, I think that one of
the things because I made somenotes on trying to help, how to
help myself in this, this areatoo and one of the things I
wrote down was evaluating mymotivations, like what's
motivating me, what's motivatingthis to like, why do I feel
this way at this time?
(18:36):
Why do I need to be the onethat is always right, or I need
to be the one that's recognized,or I need to be the one that is
always right, or I need to bethe one that's recognized, or I
need to be the one, like I hadto start asking those questions
internally and say, hey, what,what is my motives here, and if
those motives aren't good, thatthat needs to change.
So that was something I wrotedown.
(18:57):
And then I guess, also practiceand humility, like being able
to listen, like more actually,just not to have to always have
the input to say, but listen andadmit my mistakes, like I
probably shouldn't.
You're right, when that personcut me off and I had had enough,
it really wasn't that big of adeal, but big of a deal, but I
made a big deal.
And if I really thought aboutit, I could feel I don't know if
(19:19):
you guys can this, but likewhen they cut me off, I could
feel like the tension in my bodylike tensioning up.
You guys want to hear a funnystory about drivers in Florida?
You guys want to hear it?
Throw some confetti if you guyswant to hear a funny story
about drivers in Florida.
Okay, all right.
So when we first moved toFlorida in 2013, we served at a
church out here and what wasinteresting was we moved to
(19:39):
Florida and everybody's so great, they're so nice.
You go in the restaurants, theywant to sit down and just talk
to you.
It's like the waiter orwaitress and they just spend
hours talking to you instead ofworking.
I'm like what the heck?
Everybody closed down at threebecause it's like oh, we've had
a long day, we gotta go,probably to the beach or
something great people.
Until they get in their carsand I told this to a the group
of the church.
(20:00):
I was like you guys, everybodyhere is great.
You guys are like oh, we loveyou, you're great people.
Then you get in your cars andyou guys turn into like little
demons and you guys are likehonking your horn, like before
the light even turns green, likewe had one person give us a
middle finger.
Because, I mean, I don't know,they gave us the middle finger
driving behind us and becausethey didn't like how slow we
were going.
(20:20):
And then they pulled up next tous at the light and I'm like,
oh great.
And they're like like this.
I'm like, oh okay, I'm like I'mgonna lose it.
They rolled, I wrote in mywindow.
I'm like, uh, your hood's openbecause we had our hood was
bungee cord closed because thehood latch was shut.
I'm like, oh, you're so nice,but you gave me, like, the
middle finger and riding mybumper all the way up here.
You want to bring up the Q&Amic there, arcane.
Speaker 3 (20:43):
Good to see y'all.
I just had to put my hand up asa native Floridian and say I'm
not just going to sit up hereand listen to y'all bash us as
drivers.
Okay, Perhaps it's the ones whodidn't you moved here that
maybe have the issue.
No, we can't.
Speaker 2 (21:04):
I will say after we got a big problem was we kept
our Ohio plates for a long time.
Once we got rid of that, it gotmuch better so yeah, I think
there's some.
Speaker 1 (21:14):
They're like get out of here tourists.
Speaker 2 (21:18):
They call them the snowbirds, like snowbirds, get
out of here.
Speaker 3 (21:22):
You make our traffic terrible, not when you live here
they call them the snowbirds.
Speaker 2 (21:22):
Like snowbirds, get out of here you make our traffic
terrible.
I know we're one of thosepeople now.
Speaker 3 (21:27):
But okay, so y'all, we got y'all.
Speaker 2 (21:29):
That's all.
But.
Speaker 3 (21:31):
I just wanted to say this is a good topic.
When I saw the inbox comethrough and just you know that
you all were kind of launchingagain or coming out of a break,
I mean it was just reallyrefreshing to see that we had a
Bible study yesterday thattalked about how much faith it
takes just to be and not to bebusy.
Speaker 2 (21:54):
You know, what I mean .
Speaker 3 (21:55):
So I think, that this is really in line with the
messaging that God is trying toget to all of us, like, even
when I saw the message, I'm like, yeah, I got to do this, this
and this, but it was just likewhy don't you just be and maybe
understand that this issomething you might need instead
?
Of acquiring all the time, kindof receiving what God has.
(22:17):
So I just wanted to celebrateboth of you and sharing your
truth.
But it is.
Speaker 2 (22:24):
It is very, very much in the vein is what I want to
say so yeah, thank you Michelle,thank you, thank you I feel
like we're learning about.
Speaker 1 (22:35):
you know, it's so against the culture to slow down
, and I mean I I'm certainly notthe first person to point that
out that's something I feel likeeveryone's talking about right
now.
But it's so hard to do.
It's so hard to make yourselfjust slow down and be I like
that way of putting it just be,you know, and especially if you
(22:57):
feel like you're getting killerB.
Yes.
Speaker 2 (23:01):
Okay.
Speaker 1 (23:03):
I actually kind of like that so yes.
I think that's something I'mlearning now that I'm back to
work.
I'm I used to think like that'snot something I struggle with.
I don't want to go, go, go.
But now that I'm working again,I see how that is such a trap,
because there's always morethings to do and there's only so
(23:24):
much time.
So I get it now.
I'm sorry that.
I always thought you know, youall were too busy.
No, not you people in general,but just people in the world.
Speaker 2 (23:33):
One of the other things that I wrote on here I
don't I only have like one, likea couple more things to kind of
talk about, because I don'twant to keep people here too
late but the other thing I wrotedown was to focus on personal
growth, my own personal growthand I mean that by like they set
my own personal goals and stopcomparing myself to others.
Like I'm like if pride becomesan issue, it's usually because
(23:56):
you're comparing yourself tosomebody else, and I was like
I've got to be careful that I'mnot doing that and and be okay,
like set goals for that.
Challenge me and my ownpersonal growth instead of
worrying about other people.
And then I wrote this down toactually celebrate those people.
yeah, that's great I'm like butthat's it's great, but you know
(24:17):
it's not easy if you're dealingwith pride, so, uh, but it's
definitely something.
I think that if I can't do that, then there's a problem.
I got to be like there shouldbe red flags, like hey,
something, be careful here.
But when I was out here,someone was talking to me and
they said the thing of and maybesome people here might be able
to relate to it, but it wasn'tas touchy this time, but I was
(24:38):
aware of it because of of thisprocess that I'm going through
now and someone said you guysare monetized, right, and again,
we've been in here for twoyears working hard and have
invested money, real money, intohelping to build what we're
doing in here and connectingpeople, and with that, god has
(24:59):
blessed us for that.
But then that little thing aboutbeing monetized hung over my
head and I'm like why aren't wemonetized?
There's so much more we coulddo and it would really get to me
.
And then this time, when thisperson brought it up and they
were so shocked, I'm like, yeah,I found myself going down the
path.
I was like I know everybody'sshocked that we're not.
I was like I don't understandeither.
But then I was like you knowwhat?
This isn't going anywhere good,except for it's going to
(25:21):
resurface up pride.
And so I changed the subject.
I don't want to stay there,because this is not healthy.
And it doesn't matter if we'remonetized, because when we meet
with people they're like well,what are you guys doing in the
metaverse?
Isn't it just a game?
We've all heard that, and now Ihave messages saved on my phone
that I'm showing them.
Like this is a message came inright here and I can share this
(25:42):
in here because this was publicon social media.
I was like but before we wenton a break, I got a message from
somebody on social media on apublic post that said that they
were, they came here and thatthe killer B studios saved their
entire family.
Like they were already thatnight they were going to go home
and burn down their house andkill.
I think they had three kids,their wife and, I think, two
(26:04):
dogs or something like that, butit was like a total of seven
people.
But they came in here and heardsomebody's story and it wasn't
us, it was somebody else.
That story was up here beingshared and it connected to them
and it changed the direction oftheir life.
I'm like that is a betterpayoff than any monetization
that you can get in here.
Absolutely it's impacting livesand that's something I had to
(26:26):
remind myself.
So, being aware of those thingsand then also practicing, the
last thing I had was practicinggratitude, you know, taking time
and remembering and thankingGod for the things that he has
done.
When I thought about that, evenwith the studios and in our
life, things like we all aregoing to have seasons that are
up like we're up on top of themountain.
(26:47):
There's a lot of times weremember the seasons that we're
down in the valley though morethan anything, especially when
we're down in the valley.
But to take and press pause andremember all the things that
God has done for us, that keepsour mind in a gratitude zone
that we can remember and trustGod and helps prevent us to stay
away from that pride.
Speaker 1 (27:06):
I was just going to say, just to take that one step
further, as you know, likespecifically about the
monetization thing.
You know, I like to think likethere's clearly a reason why
that hasn't happened and that'sbest for us, for what we're
doing here for now.
You know, maybe it'll happen inthe future, maybe not, but no
(27:27):
matter what, there's got to be areason why that's not happening
.
You know, god's got it undercontrol and he's brought us this
far, like if he wants us tokeep going, that's going to
happen, Amen.
Speaker 2 (27:38):
And if we're doing it to be monetized, then are we
doing it for the right reason.
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