April 6, 2024 • 21 mins
Ever wondered why you can't stop eating at night?
Can you relate to the feeling of late-evening pantry raids after a not-so-peachy day. You might eat a biscuit, then five minutes later a slice of cheese. Followed by a handful of grapes… and half a Mars bar. Then go back to the biscuits for (probably) 6 more.
…Trying to fill that hole, that gap, that needed to be fed.
If you are nodding along, thinking, "Mmm-Hmm, this is me," just know you're not alone. I’ve been there, done that, plenty of times myself.
Together, we'll uncover WHY those (unhelpful) daytime diets might set us up for evening binges and HOW a shift towards balanced, intentional eating to build healthier habits to kick emotional eating to the curb.
Say hello to a world where complex carbs, proteins, healthy fats, and fiber are your BFFs in the fight against the late-night munchies, and where you can FINALLY feel in control around food.
The second half of today's chat we peel back the layers of emotional eating - with experiences from my own journey. If you've ever found solace in a cookie (or half the packet..) we're going to break down those patterns and learn how to find comfort beyond the pantry and let go of the food-guilt (HOORAY!)
Register for my FREE webinar here: https://lyndicohen.easywebinar.live/event-registration
Want to feel more in control around food? Check out my Stop Struggling With Food Guide, currently on sale for 40% off.
You’ll also find 50 of my favourite recipes to get you inspired!
Looking for more support to feel in control around food? I'd love to support you in my Binge Free Academy.
Come follow me on the gram at @nude_nutritionist (no nude pics, sorry).
Want to share some feedback or have an idea for an episode, I'd LOVE to hear from you - hit me up at hello@lyndicohen.com
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Transcript
Episode Transcript
Available transcripts are automatically generated. Complete accuracy is not guaranteed.
Speaker 1 (00:00):
I still remember the meal plan she gave me that
dietitian I saw when I wasprobably 19 years old.
For breakfast, I would startwith a black coffee, a small
piece of toast with somethinglike cottage cheese on it.
Morning tea was a small apple.
She even specified that itneeded to be small.
(00:21):
Lunch was a salad with proteinand low-fat salad dressing.
Afternoon I was allowed 100g offat-free, no added sugar
yoghurt.
Well, I bet you can guess whathappened as soon as I walked
through the door.
I get home after studying atuniversity all day pumping
(00:43):
myself up with sugar-free energydrinks and I'd rampage through
my kitchen.
I would cook up noodles and Iwould eat chocolate by the block
.
I would demolish ice creamBread would just end to me and I
couldn't stop eating.
Now, this is a bit of anextreme example of when I was
(01:06):
completely denying myself offood during the day, only to end
up binge eating at night.
I've had less extreme versionsof this, though, where I've been
on a healthy eating plan, doingwhat I thought was a little bit
more balanced, and yet I'dstill come home and the
avalanche of eating would startand I'd eat more than I planned.
Even if it wasn't binge eating,I was definitely eating more
(01:28):
than I wanted to and I felt soincredibly helpless, like why
can everyone else be in controlof food?
But I am not in control, and Ireally thought there was
something wrong with me for avery long time.
Well, turns out there wasnothing wrong with me.
The reason I couldn't stopovereating at night time wasn't
an intrinsic fault or flaw.
There was nothing wrong with mywillpower.
(01:49):
I was doing a whole bunch ofthings that were making it so
hard for me to actually stopeating when I felt full.
Hello everyone, and welcome toanother episode of no Wellness
Wankery.
I am your host, lindy Cohen, adietitian and nutritionist who's
(02:10):
done far too many diets.
In fact, it used to be acompulsive binge and emotional
eater and now I can't rememberthe last time I felt out of
control with food.
I helped thousands andthousands of people feel normal
around food, something you sodeserve.
This podcast is research andscience backed, because that's
what we need.
We need to follow advice thatis actually rooted in the
(02:32):
evidence Instead of followingall this silly diet advice.
It just makes health eating waymore complicated than it needs
to be.
In this podcast, you are goingto hear from experts like myself
, real stories from clients andpeople who are going through
exactly what you're goingthrough, and the aim is to help
you feel relaxed and in controlaround food, something you so
(02:53):
deserve.
Today's episode is for anyonewho's ever wondered why can't I
stop overeating at night, whatis wrong with me?
And if you are one of thosepeople who you feel like you try
so hard to be good during theday, only to end up binge eating
or overeating at night, thenyou're in the right place, my
(03:14):
friend.
So, whether it's binging onsomething sweet after dinner or
inhaling whatever food you canget your paws on after work,
this is manageable andpreventable if you address the
causes of this behavior, andwe're going to get into it in
this podcast.
By far the biggest mistake Isee so many people making, so
(03:42):
many clients making, is noteating enough during the day,
and I know you're probably goingto say to me I am eating enough
.
That's why I need help withnutrition.
I can't stop eating, and Iwould say one of the biggest
problems is that you're probablyeating most of your food at
nighttime, doing it in a waythat feels really out of control
, and this is how we're leadingto that intense overeating as
(04:05):
opposed to intentionally eatingmore during the day.
So, remembering there'sdifference between impulsive
eating and intentional eating,and what I need you to do is
give yourself permission to eatmore than you probably think you
should during the day.
Like I told you in the beginning, I had these meal plans
throughout my entire teens andtwenties.
That would tell me what I wasand was not allowed to eat, and
(04:28):
so it's really hard for me toforget what a perfect day on the
plate looks like.
I have all these ideas of whatis acceptable, what is not
acceptable, what is naughty,what is good, what is bad and,
as a result, what I found I wasdoing is I was trying to stick
to what I thought a healthy meallooked like.
I'd finished the meal let's sayit's lunchtime and I still had
a little sweet craving.
I was like, oh, I'm quitesatisfied.
(04:50):
But the willpower was stillstrong at that point and I would
persevere and try to stick tomy diet and be good, only to get
into that inevitable overeatingat night time.
Now, what I learned the hard wayand through seeing thousands of
clients, is that when we adjustwhat you eat during the day,
making sure you're actuallyeating enough and, as I said,
sometimes more than you thinkyou're allowed to eat based on
(05:13):
all those diet rules.
What you're going to notice ismore satisfaction, a reduction
in cravings, and you might findthat that overeating at night
time becomes a thing of the past.
Here's what I want you lookingfor.
I want you to make sure thosemeals that you're eating are
adequately balanced.
You know the drill.
We're looking for a complexcarbohydrate, something that's
(05:36):
high in fiber, something withprotein and healthy fats, and
each of these three componentscome together to help you create
a meal that is truly satisfying.
Then we want to add vegetables,or fruit or legumes because
legumes, they do count towardsour veggie intake as well and
we're bulking out our meal bydoing this, making sure that
(05:56):
there's enough roughage for ourgut to work at its best and
making sure that there'sactually enough food in our
stomach that it presses againstthe stomach lining, which sends
those message to our brain tosay, ah, they're eaten, they're
full, that's cool, we can chillnow.
Firstly, if you are one of thosepeople who are trying to save
calories for later in the day,it is such a recipe for
(06:19):
overeating when you get toohungry or when you start feeling
a little bit tired or stressed,and you know what Life is very
stressful.
If you were a robot and youlived in a controlled
environment and you didn't haveto deal with the dramas of life,
I'm pretty sure you could stickto a meal plan.
But the reason those havefailed are because you are a
(06:40):
human with a complex life.
So stop wishing that.
Oh, you know, I'll be able tostick to the diet when life
calms down.
When I finish this project,when my kids go back to school,
we always say this I willfinally be able to stick to it
when all these beautiful thingscome into alignment.
But that's just not the way itworks.
Instead, building those balancepills with those you know that
(07:03):
healthy fat, with the protein,with the carbohydrates, and
eating more than you probablythink you should during the day
and experiment with this andyou're going to see that, oh,
maybe it does make a bigdifference.
Now you might be going okay,but what should I eat?
Now it's hard for me on apodcast to tell you what you
should be eating, because if youwere seeing me one on one or in
something like my Binge FreeAcademy, I'd be able to help you
(07:24):
and we'll talk about all thosedifferent ideas of things that
you could be having, butgenerally, you know, it could be
a sandwich with tuna and somechopped cherry tomatoes on the
side.
Now, that can be a reallysimple, few-ingredient kind of
meal.
It could be some scrambled eggsthat you're having on a slice
of toast.
It could be maybe somethingthat you had from dinner last
(07:47):
night.
It could be a pasta.
I know us dieters we're reallyfear pasta, but I tell you what
I sat down to have a pasta theother day.
It's a broccoli mac and cheese.
The recipe is on my website ifyou want to grab it.
It's also inside my Back toBasics app and I finished eating
that meal, which is so easy topull together, and I felt so
(08:08):
satisfied.
You know what?
The creaminess of the cheese,something I was told to avoid
when I was a dieter.
That is what made me feelsatisfied.
The pasta made me feel full andthe broccoli added to the bulk
of what I was eating.
There was some cottage cheeseadded in there and that was
adding in that protein.
So it was an awesome, balancedmeal, something my dieting past
(08:29):
would have gone on or.
You definitely can't eat that.
That's way too much.
But I ate to satisfaction andyou know what?
I ended up having a reallylight dinner because I actually
just wasn't that hungry.
Number two the second mostcommon mistake, or something I
see people falling into the trapof, is using food to self
soothe at night.
(08:50):
Something I found very usefulis to remind myself of this.
Food is not joy, food is notsleep, food is not rest, food is
not connection.
Food is not going to offer youall the things that you need.
It's not self care, it's justfood.
And due to all these diets thatwe have tried, we have loaded
(09:10):
all this emotional baggage ontofood.
And perhaps you were a kid whowas raised by parents who used
food as a reward.
If you're a good girl, I'llgive you a lollipop, or you're
given a lollipop by going to thedoctor and getting your
vaccination, a reward for yourgood behavior, or food was taken
away from you.
If you're a bad girl, I'm notgonna let you eat or you're not
(09:31):
gonna be able to have dinner.
All the kinds of things that wewere taught growing up, or
perhaps it was.
You have to finish everythingon your plate, almost using food
as a punishment.
And all of this behavior, allthese learned experiences from
growing up really do help toreinforce that.
Food is something that can beused for emotional soothing.
Now I have to say it is true,food is very good at emotionally
(09:53):
regulating for a little bit, itdoes a whole raft of things
that make us feel good.
That is why we so oftencelebrate with food.
You think about a birthday cakeor party food, or even if we're
grieving, you're at a wake,there's food, there's like a
connector between all of us, andso some degree of emotional
(10:13):
eating is normal and healthy.
In fact, eating food is justone of the many coping
strategies you have up yoursleeve.
The issue is when emotionaleating becomes your go-to self
soothing strategy, as it hadbecome for me.
I looked forward to coming homebecause I knew I had my binge
(10:34):
waiting for me, that food.
It didn't really seem to judgeme and I knew I could just
escape life for that brieflittle moment while I was eating
whatever it was.
I go through the drive-throughget McDonald's, get whatever I
wanted, and just for that briefperiod of time it's like I could
suspend reality, escapism andits ultimate, and I was so using
(10:55):
food to self-soothe.
Now, over the years, I'vebecome so much better at
recognizing what I'm actuallyfeeling and then reminding
myself of the fact that food isnot joy, it's not sleep, it's
not rest, it's not connection,it's just food.
And perhaps you could try thatfor yourself.
Next time you feel that urge toeat emotionally, you can remind
yourself food is not thesethings, even if you end up
(11:17):
emotionally eating.
So you're coming home, you'regoing oh, I've had a really
tough day, I just wanna eatsomething.
Simply becoming aware of thefact that you are emotional
eating is a huge improvement.
You can go oh, I've had a hardday, this is emotional eating.
Try not to judge that feeling.
Just sit with it, go, okay, Iknow what I'm doing.
The awareness can make such adifference already a huge
(11:38):
improvement.
Then the next step you could gookay, well, I am still gonna do
a bit of emotional eating.
But what else can I also addinto this to help me self-soothe
?
So you might go all right, well, I'm gonna have some chocolate,
and then I'm also gonna see ifI can get to bed a little bit
earlier, because what I reallyneed is rest.
Or I'm gonna text my friendsand just tell them I had a
really tough day.
So we think about this as habitstacking habit stacking for
(12:02):
your emotional eating Then thenext step is going okay.
Now, maybe we don't always needthe emotional eating.
Once you've strengthened yourability to use some of these
other self-soothing skills, youmight find that actually the
emotional eating isn't asimportant.
Now, if you're doing this inconjunction with creating a
healthier relationship with food, you are going to get the best
(12:22):
results.
Number three another hugemistake is not recognizing that
your diet rules are controllingyou.
Now, if you are like me and youhave tried countless diets
whether it's the Akins or Ketoor Macros or the cabbage soup
(12:43):
diet, weight Watchers, noom,jenny Craig I mean, I can go on,
I can go on.
Do you want me to go on?
Are you probably nodding yourhead, going, okay, I've done
some of these as well.
Well, if you aren't that person, every single time you have
gone on one of those diets, it'slike you've picked up a handful
of sand and you've popped itinto your brain and each diet
(13:05):
you're adding in another handfulof sand.
Now, each granule of sand isanother diet rule and it's
filling your brain.
And right now, if you've beendieting for years a decade,
maybe decades can you imaginehow many conflicting diet rules
are probably existing in yourbrain, making it so incredibly
(13:25):
hard for you to simply make afood choice.
You know, you look at a menu.
You go oh my goodness, thereare so many options.
Which is the healthiest, whichis the best?
Oh, that's got too high insugar and fat and carbs and it
feels like you're not allowed toeat anything.
The problem with these dietrules is we think that they are
the solution, but they arereally the problem.
If you feel like you have tomake up for overeating or binge
(13:47):
eating episodes the next day,then that is also another diet
rule.
If you feel like you need toreduce your portion sizes to be
good, even mindful eating can besome kind of form of diet rule
thinking I've got to be goodtoday.
I'm not allowed this manycarbohydrates.
I can't eat after 6 pm oh mygoodness.
The list goes on and on.
Some people have hundreds,perhaps even thousands of these
(14:08):
diet rules that have all cometogether to make healthy eating
so much harder.
So a really important step weneed to do is identify which
other diet rules that controlyou the most and start to pull
them out of your brain, makinghealthy eating so much easier.
If you have not read my book.
Your Weight is Not the Problem.
I talk about this in depth.
I give you very tangible tipson how you can start to unpick
(14:31):
those diet rules, focusing onthe ones that are going to make
the biggest impact, the biggestimprovement in your life
immediately.
You can get your Weight is Notthe Problem from any online
retailer at the moment wherebooks are sold, and also some
really good bookshops, and it issuch a good place to start Now.
(14:52):
I recently came across someinteresting research from UNSW
which showed how tired it is.
So maybe that's you people whohave lots of diet rules.
You're not actually able toadjust how much you eat
according to your hunger andfullness Someone who is what I
call unicorn, who has neverdieted before.
If they eat more than I before,they might wake up the next day
(15:13):
and go I'm not actually thathungry.
I might change what I'm eatingtoday to account for it.
Or they wake up really hungryand they might eat more.
If you're a dieter, that is aforeign concept, because, once
again, we have that meal planplaying in our minds that we
cannot forget what we should beeating and we try to stick to it
and, as a result of these dietrules, these meal plans, the
(15:35):
idea of what we should be eating, actually means that we don't
do that kind of compensatorynatural behavior that
non-dieters do.
That is so important, that isso healthy and another reason
why removing these diet ruleswill actually make intuitive
eating so much easier.
A lot of people were saying tome I've tried intuitive eating.
It's so hard, I can't do it.
Well, we do have to also stopdieting at the same time.
(15:57):
These two ideas have to coexist.
You can't just do one withoutthe other.
You can't just use intuitiveeating as a means to try and
lose weight, because you'reprobably gonna end up overeating
more.
And the stake number four isnot seeking help or trying to go
it alone.
Now, situations like this, whenyou are overeating at night or
(16:18):
you're binge eating at night, ifyou go on being untreated or
you just go, I'm just going towhite knuckle it and try even
harder.
What tends to happen is it getsworse and worse over time, and
that's due to the compensationthat you're doing.
The next day, you're going,lying in bed, going oh no, I
can't believe I messed up yetagain.
I'm going to start againtomorrow or I'm going to start
(16:39):
again on Monday.
You wake up and you go right,we're going to be good.
You typically under eat, likethat meal plan I told you about
in the beginning, or you justeat, you think you're eating
enough, but you're still not,and then we are getting into
that inevitable overeatingpattern again.
You can see the pattern onceyou're aware of it.
I think it's incredibly helpfulthat, as I said, there are so
(17:01):
many little bits and bobs thatwe want to be tackling in order
to get on top of this overeating, on top of this emotional
eating and on top of this bingeeating, all of which are three
different things requiringslightly different strategies
for each.
So please do not try and go italone.
Do not rely on your Instagramfeed to give you ideas on how to
manage your wellbeing, which,according to recent research, is
(17:23):
where most people are nowgetting their health advice,
which scares me, and there's yetanother reason why I am
actually sharing a lot of adviceon Instagram at nude underscore
nutritionist.
Now, if you are ready to go,you know I don't want to be the
person who comes home and justfalls into the pantry and that
doom and guilt and shame thatfollows.
(17:43):
If you're sick of that cycle,you can actually do something
about it.
I have my free five day coursefor emotional and binge eating.
If this is you and you're goingyes, this is me I think I would
benefit then I'll leave a linkin the description Go ahead and
you can do that five day course.
It's totally free.
I'm giving you lots of tips.
I'm giving you some really nicelike visuals and ideas on what
(18:03):
you can do to make a differencein your overeating this week.
So if you go ahead and you dothat, you're going to notice a
big shift very quickly.
And, of course, if you arelooking for that one on one
support, you're going.
I actually need a professional,and not just professional,
someone who's also walked in myshoes before I get it.
I am that person and I wouldlove to help you inside my binge
(18:24):
free Academy.
Binge free Academy is the onlyplace where you can get that
group live coaching with me,where I can answer your
questions, help you fix this,help you recover from what might
be years and years of dieting.
Now, sadly, recovery andlearning how to feel more in
control and relax around foodisn't a quick fix.
I'm the first to admit that.
(18:44):
But that's why, when you dobinge free Academy.
I'm there holding your hand.
That's why you have lifetimeaccess to the course content.
Because it's tricky.
I know the common mistakes andtraps and I'm there to help you
avoid them.
Now I hope you found today'sepisode useful.
If you liked this podcast, Iwould be so grateful if you left
(19:08):
a review for it.
Honestly, sometimes I feel likeI'm just sitting here in my
study talking to no one, andknowing that you are out there
really is motivating for me togo.
I should keep doing this.
I should keep providing thisfree content for you, hopefully
making a difference in youreating.
So please go ahead and leave areview and help motivate me.
(19:29):
I'd be so grateful.
And if you have a friend, amother, a sister, a grandmother,
anyone who you think wouldbenefit from no Wellness Wankery
podcast, please do forward onthis podcast to them.
It would make such a bigdifference.
Anyway, thank you so much forlistening to today's episode.
I'll see you next time.
I still remember the meal plan she gave me that
dietitian I saw when I wasprobably 19 years old.
For breakfast, I would startwith a black coffee, a small
piece of toast with somethinglike cottage cheese on it.
Morning tea was a small apple.
She even specified that itneeded to be small.
(00:21):
Lunch was a salad with proteinand low-fat salad dressing.
Afternoon I was allowed 100g offat-free, no added sugar
yoghurt.
Well, I bet you can guess whathappened as soon as I walked
through the door.
I get home after studying atuniversity all day pumping
(00:43):
myself up with sugar-free energydrinks and I'd rampage through
my kitchen.
I would cook up noodles and Iwould eat chocolate by the block
.
I would demolish ice creamBread would just end to me and I
couldn't stop eating.
Now, this is a bit of anextreme example of when I was
(01:06):
completely denying myself offood during the day, only to end
up binge eating at night.
I've had less extreme versionsof this, though, where I've been
on a healthy eating plan, doingwhat I thought was a little bit
more balanced, and yet I'dstill come home and the
avalanche of eating would startand I'd eat more than I planned.
Even if it wasn't binge eating,I was definitely eating more
(01:28):
than I wanted to and I felt soincredibly helpless, like why
can everyone else be in controlof food?
But I am not in control, and Ireally thought there was
something wrong with me for avery long time.
Well, turns out there wasnothing wrong with me.
The reason I couldn't stopovereating at night time wasn't
an intrinsic fault or flaw.
There was nothing wrong with mywillpower.
(01:49):
I was doing a whole bunch ofthings that were making it so
hard for me to actually stopeating when I felt full.
Hello everyone, and welcome toanother episode of no Wellness
Wankery.
I am your host, lindy Cohen, adietitian and nutritionist who's
(02:10):
done far too many diets.
In fact, it used to be acompulsive binge and emotional
eater and now I can't rememberthe last time I felt out of
control with food.
I helped thousands andthousands of people feel normal
around food, something you sodeserve.
This podcast is research andscience backed, because that's
what we need.
We need to follow advice thatis actually rooted in the
(02:32):
evidence Instead of followingall this silly diet advice.
It just makes health eating waymore complicated than it needs
to be.
In this podcast, you are goingto hear from experts like myself
, real stories from clients andpeople who are going through
exactly what you're goingthrough, and the aim is to help
you feel relaxed and in controlaround food, something you so
(02:53):
deserve.
Today's episode is for anyonewho's ever wondered why can't I
stop overeating at night, whatis wrong with me?
And if you are one of thosepeople who you feel like you try
so hard to be good during theday, only to end up binge eating
or overeating at night, thenyou're in the right place, my
(03:14):
friend.
So, whether it's binging onsomething sweet after dinner or
inhaling whatever food you canget your paws on after work,
this is manageable andpreventable if you address the
causes of this behavior, andwe're going to get into it in
this podcast.
By far the biggest mistake Isee so many people making, so
(03:42):
many clients making, is noteating enough during the day,
and I know you're probably goingto say to me I am eating enough
.
That's why I need help withnutrition.
I can't stop eating, and Iwould say one of the biggest
problems is that you're probablyeating most of your food at
nighttime, doing it in a waythat feels really out of control
, and this is how we're leadingto that intense overeating as
(04:05):
opposed to intentionally eatingmore during the day.
So, remembering there'sdifference between impulsive
eating and intentional eating,and what I need you to do is
give yourself permission to eatmore than you probably think you
should during the day.
Like I told you in the beginning, I had these meal plans
throughout my entire teens andtwenties.
That would tell me what I wasand was not allowed to eat, and
(04:28):
so it's really hard for me toforget what a perfect day on the
plate looks like.
I have all these ideas of whatis acceptable, what is not
acceptable, what is naughty,what is good, what is bad and,
as a result, what I found I wasdoing is I was trying to stick
to what I thought a healthy meallooked like.
I'd finished the meal let's sayit's lunchtime and I still had
a little sweet craving.
I was like, oh, I'm quitesatisfied.
(04:50):
But the willpower was stillstrong at that point and I would
persevere and try to stick tomy diet and be good, only to get
into that inevitable overeatingat night time.
Now, what I learned the hard wayand through seeing thousands of
clients, is that when we adjustwhat you eat during the day,
making sure you're actuallyeating enough and, as I said,
sometimes more than you thinkyou're allowed to eat based on
(05:13):
all those diet rules.
What you're going to notice ismore satisfaction, a reduction
in cravings, and you might findthat that overeating at night
time becomes a thing of the past.
Here's what I want you lookingfor.
I want you to make sure thosemeals that you're eating are
adequately balanced.
You know the drill.
We're looking for a complexcarbohydrate, something that's
(05:36):
high in fiber, something withprotein and healthy fats, and
each of these three componentscome together to help you create
a meal that is truly satisfying.
Then we want to add vegetables,or fruit or legumes because
legumes, they do count towardsour veggie intake as well and
we're bulking out our meal bydoing this, making sure that
(05:56):
there's enough roughage for ourgut to work at its best and
making sure that there'sactually enough food in our
stomach that it presses againstthe stomach lining, which sends
those message to our brain tosay, ah, they're eaten, they're
full, that's cool, we can chillnow.
Firstly, if you are one of thosepeople who are trying to save
calories for later in the day,it is such a recipe for
(06:19):
overeating when you get toohungry or when you start feeling
a little bit tired or stressed,and you know what Life is very
stressful.
If you were a robot and youlived in a controlled
environment and you didn't haveto deal with the dramas of life,
I'm pretty sure you could stickto a meal plan.
But the reason those havefailed are because you are a
(06:40):
human with a complex life.
So stop wishing that.
Oh, you know, I'll be able tostick to the diet when life
calms down.
When I finish this project,when my kids go back to school,
we always say this I willfinally be able to stick to it
when all these beautiful thingscome into alignment.
But that's just not the way itworks.
Instead, building those balancepills with those you know that
(07:03):
healthy fat, with the protein,with the carbohydrates, and
eating more than you probablythink you should during the day
and experiment with this andyou're going to see that, oh,
maybe it does make a bigdifference.
Now you might be going okay,but what should I eat?
Now it's hard for me on apodcast to tell you what you
should be eating, because if youwere seeing me one on one or in
something like my Binge FreeAcademy, I'd be able to help you
(07:24):
and we'll talk about all thosedifferent ideas of things that
you could be having, butgenerally, you know, it could be
a sandwich with tuna and somechopped cherry tomatoes on the
side.
Now, that can be a reallysimple, few-ingredient kind of
meal.
It could be some scrambled eggsthat you're having on a slice
of toast.
It could be maybe somethingthat you had from dinner last
(07:47):
night.
It could be a pasta.
I know us dieters we're reallyfear pasta, but I tell you what
I sat down to have a pasta theother day.
It's a broccoli mac and cheese.
The recipe is on my website ifyou want to grab it.
It's also inside my Back toBasics app and I finished eating
that meal, which is so easy topull together, and I felt so
(08:08):
satisfied.
You know what?
The creaminess of the cheese,something I was told to avoid
when I was a dieter.
That is what made me feelsatisfied.
The pasta made me feel full andthe broccoli added to the bulk
of what I was eating.
There was some cottage cheeseadded in there and that was
adding in that protein.
So it was an awesome, balancedmeal, something my dieting past
(08:29):
would have gone on or.
You definitely can't eat that.
That's way too much.
But I ate to satisfaction andyou know what?
I ended up having a reallylight dinner because I actually
just wasn't that hungry.
Number two the second mostcommon mistake, or something I
see people falling into the trapof, is using food to self
soothe at night.
(08:50):
Something I found very usefulis to remind myself of this.
Food is not joy, food is notsleep, food is not rest, food is
not connection.
Food is not going to offer youall the things that you need.
It's not self care, it's justfood.
And due to all these diets thatwe have tried, we have loaded
(09:10):
all this emotional baggage ontofood.
And perhaps you were a kid whowas raised by parents who used
food as a reward.
If you're a good girl, I'llgive you a lollipop, or you're
given a lollipop by going to thedoctor and getting your
vaccination, a reward for yourgood behavior, or food was taken
away from you.
If you're a bad girl, I'm notgonna let you eat or you're not
(09:31):
gonna be able to have dinner.
All the kinds of things that wewere taught growing up, or
perhaps it was.
You have to finish everythingon your plate, almost using food
as a punishment.
And all of this behavior, allthese learned experiences from
growing up really do help toreinforce that.
Food is something that can beused for emotional soothing.
Now I have to say it is true,food is very good at emotionally
(09:53):
regulating for a little bit, itdoes a whole raft of things
that make us feel good.
That is why we so oftencelebrate with food.
You think about a birthday cakeor party food, or even if we're
grieving, you're at a wake,there's food, there's like a
connector between all of us, andso some degree of emotional
(10:13):
eating is normal and healthy.
In fact, eating food is justone of the many coping
strategies you have up yoursleeve.
The issue is when emotionaleating becomes your go-to self
soothing strategy, as it hadbecome for me.
I looked forward to coming homebecause I knew I had my binge
(10:34):
waiting for me, that food.
It didn't really seem to judgeme and I knew I could just
escape life for that brieflittle moment while I was eating
whatever it was.
I go through the drive-throughget McDonald's, get whatever I
wanted, and just for that briefperiod of time it's like I could
suspend reality, escapism andits ultimate, and I was so using
(10:55):
food to self-soothe.
Now, over the years, I'vebecome so much better at
recognizing what I'm actuallyfeeling and then reminding
myself of the fact that food isnot joy, it's not sleep, it's
not rest, it's not connection,it's just food.
And perhaps you could try thatfor yourself.
Next time you feel that urge toeat emotionally, you can remind
yourself food is not thesethings, even if you end up
(11:17):
emotionally eating.
So you're coming home, you'regoing oh, I've had a really
tough day, I just wanna eatsomething.
Simply becoming aware of thefact that you are emotional
eating is a huge improvement.
You can go oh, I've had a hardday, this is emotional eating.
Try not to judge that feeling.
Just sit with it, go, okay, Iknow what I'm doing.
The awareness can make such adifference already a huge
(11:38):
improvement.
Then the next step you could gookay, well, I am still gonna do
a bit of emotional eating.
But what else can I also addinto this to help me self-soothe
?
So you might go all right, well, I'm gonna have some chocolate,
and then I'm also gonna see ifI can get to bed a little bit
earlier, because what I reallyneed is rest.
Or I'm gonna text my friendsand just tell them I had a
really tough day.
So we think about this as habitstacking habit stacking for
(12:02):
your emotional eating Then thenext step is going okay.
Now, maybe we don't always needthe emotional eating.
Once you've strengthened yourability to use some of these
other self-soothing skills, youmight find that actually the
emotional eating isn't asimportant.
Now, if you're doing this inconjunction with creating a
healthier relationship with food, you are going to get the best
(12:22):
results.
Number three another hugemistake is not recognizing that
your diet rules are controllingyou.
Now, if you are like me and youhave tried countless diets
whether it's the Akins or Ketoor Macros or the cabbage soup
(12:43):
diet, weight Watchers, noom,jenny Craig I mean, I can go on,
I can go on.
Do you want me to go on?
Are you probably nodding yourhead, going, okay, I've done
some of these as well.
Well, if you aren't that person, every single time you have
gone on one of those diets, it'slike you've picked up a handful
of sand and you've popped itinto your brain and each diet
(13:05):
you're adding in another handfulof sand.
Now, each granule of sand isanother diet rule and it's
filling your brain.
And right now, if you've beendieting for years a decade,
maybe decades can you imaginehow many conflicting diet rules
are probably existing in yourbrain, making it so incredibly
(13:25):
hard for you to simply make afood choice.
You know, you look at a menu.
You go oh my goodness, thereare so many options.
Which is the healthiest, whichis the best?
Oh, that's got too high insugar and fat and carbs and it
feels like you're not allowed toeat anything.
The problem with these dietrules is we think that they are
the solution, but they arereally the problem.
If you feel like you have tomake up for overeating or binge
(13:47):
eating episodes the next day,then that is also another diet
rule.
If you feel like you need toreduce your portion sizes to be
good, even mindful eating can besome kind of form of diet rule
thinking I've got to be goodtoday.
I'm not allowed this manycarbohydrates.
I can't eat after 6 pm oh mygoodness.
The list goes on and on.
Some people have hundreds,perhaps even thousands of these
(14:08):
diet rules that have all cometogether to make healthy eating
so much harder.
So a really important step weneed to do is identify which
other diet rules that controlyou the most and start to pull
them out of your brain, makinghealthy eating so much easier.
If you have not read my book.
Your Weight is Not the Problem.
I talk about this in depth.
I give you very tangible tipson how you can start to unpick
(14:31):
those diet rules, focusing onthe ones that are going to make
the biggest impact, the biggestimprovement in your life
immediately.
You can get your Weight is Notthe Problem from any online
retailer at the moment wherebooks are sold, and also some
really good bookshops, and it issuch a good place to start Now.
(14:52):
I recently came across someinteresting research from UNSW
which showed how tired it is.
So maybe that's you people whohave lots of diet rules.
You're not actually able toadjust how much you eat
according to your hunger andfullness Someone who is what I
call unicorn, who has neverdieted before.
If they eat more than I before,they might wake up the next day
(15:13):
and go I'm not actually thathungry.
I might change what I'm eatingtoday to account for it.
Or they wake up really hungryand they might eat more.
If you're a dieter, that is aforeign concept, because, once
again, we have that meal planplaying in our minds that we
cannot forget what we should beeating and we try to stick to it
and, as a result of these dietrules, these meal plans, the
(15:35):
idea of what we should be eating, actually means that we don't
do that kind of compensatorynatural behavior that
non-dieters do.
That is so important, that isso healthy and another reason
why removing these diet ruleswill actually make intuitive
eating so much easier.
A lot of people were saying tome I've tried intuitive eating.
It's so hard, I can't do it.
Well, we do have to also stopdieting at the same time.
(15:57):
These two ideas have to coexist.
You can't just do one withoutthe other.
You can't just use intuitiveeating as a means to try and
lose weight, because you'reprobably gonna end up overeating
more.
And the stake number four isnot seeking help or trying to go
it alone.
Now, situations like this, whenyou are overeating at night or
(16:18):
you're binge eating at night, ifyou go on being untreated or
you just go, I'm just going towhite knuckle it and try even
harder.
What tends to happen is it getsworse and worse over time, and
that's due to the compensationthat you're doing.
The next day, you're going,lying in bed, going oh no, I
can't believe I messed up yetagain.
I'm going to start againtomorrow or I'm going to start
(16:39):
again on Monday.
You wake up and you go right,we're going to be good.
You typically under eat, likethat meal plan I told you about
in the beginning, or you justeat, you think you're eating
enough, but you're still not,and then we are getting into
that inevitable overeatingpattern again.
You can see the pattern onceyou're aware of it.
I think it's incredibly helpfulthat, as I said, there are so
(17:01):
many little bits and bobs thatwe want to be tackling in order
to get on top of this overeating, on top of this emotional
eating and on top of this bingeeating, all of which are three
different things requiringslightly different strategies
for each.
So please do not try and go italone.
Do not rely on your Instagramfeed to give you ideas on how to
manage your wellbeing, which,according to recent research, is
(17:23):
where most people are nowgetting their health advice,
which scares me, and there's yetanother reason why I am
actually sharing a lot of adviceon Instagram at nude underscore
nutritionist.
Now, if you are ready to go,you know I don't want to be the
person who comes home and justfalls into the pantry and that
doom and guilt and shame thatfollows.
(17:43):
If you're sick of that cycle,you can actually do something
about it.
I have my free five day coursefor emotional and binge eating.
If this is you and you're goingyes, this is me I think I would
benefit then I'll leave a linkin the description Go ahead and
you can do that five day course.
It's totally free.
I'm giving you lots of tips.
I'm giving you some really nicelike visuals and ideas on what
(18:03):
you can do to make a differencein your overeating this week.
So if you go ahead and you dothat, you're going to notice a
big shift very quickly.
And, of course, if you arelooking for that one on one
support, you're going.
I actually need a professional,and not just professional,
someone who's also walked in myshoes before I get it.
I am that person and I wouldlove to help you inside my binge
(18:24):
free Academy.
Binge free Academy is the onlyplace where you can get that
group live coaching with me,where I can answer your
questions, help you fix this,help you recover from what might
be years and years of dieting.
Now, sadly, recovery andlearning how to feel more in
control and relax around foodisn't a quick fix.
I'm the first to admit that.
(18:44):
But that's why, when you dobinge free Academy.
I'm there holding your hand.
That's why you have lifetimeaccess to the course content.
Because it's tricky.
I know the common mistakes andtraps and I'm there to help you
avoid them.
Now I hope you found today'sepisode useful.
If you liked this podcast, Iwould be so grateful if you left
(19:08):
a review for it.
Honestly, sometimes I feel likeI'm just sitting here in my
study talking to no one, andknowing that you are out there
really is motivating for me togo.
I should keep doing this.
I should keep providing thisfree content for you, hopefully
making a difference in youreating.
So please go ahead and leave areview and help motivate me.
(19:29):
I'd be so grateful.
And if you have a friend, amother, a sister, a grandmother,
anyone who you think wouldbenefit from no Wellness Wankery
podcast, please do forward onthis podcast to them.
It would make such a bigdifference.
Anyway, thank you so much forlistening to today's episode.
I'll see you next time.
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