Do you worry that your desires make you “too much”?
Like wanting more connection, more honesty, or more love means something is wrong with you?
You're not broken—you’re just becoming.
In this episode of Nope! We’re Not Monogamous, I’m getting all the way real about the internalized guilt so many of us carry when we crave “more” in our relationships. More connection. More truth. More you. And especially inside non-monogamy, where wanting more can trigger every insecurity we’ve ever inherited from monogamy culture.
🔍 We’re unpacking:
- Why wanting more doesn’t make you greedy—it makes you honest
- The myth of being “enough” in non-monogamy and why it’s total B.S.
- How monogamous conditioning gaslights our desire and shrinks our relationships
- What “enough” actually means—and why it’s YOUR definition that matters
- Why non-monogamy isn’t inherently chaotic (but support + tools matter)
- How to let go of the shame and build relationships that are truthful, not performative
✨ If you’ve been asking yourself, “Am I selfish for wanting more?” or “Would they still want others if I were enough?”—this one’s for you. And spoiler: no, you're not selfish. You're self-aware.
Mentioned in this episode:
👉 My 3-month coaching program Breaking Free From Monogamy—for folks ready to stop surviving and start creating love on your terms. Learn more at elleciapaine.com
If this episode made your heart exhale…
➡️ Leave a review.
➡️ Share it with someone who needs to hear it.
➡️ Or DM me on Instagram @elleciapaine and tell me what hit.
Because you’re not too much. You’re just ready to stop pretending crumbs are enough.
And that? That’s the beginning of something real.
📰 Subscribe to Not A Monogamous Newsletter to stay up to date with new episodes and offerings from Ellecia. https://elleciapaine.podia.com/newsletter
❤️ Enjoying the show? The best way to thank us is by following and leaving a review or a note. And if you want more, join our Patreon! http://www.patreon.com/notmonogamous
👀 Find Us Online
🌍 Website: https://www.elleciapaine.com
📘 Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/elleciapaine
📸 Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/elleciapaine/
Music: Composer/Author (CA): Oscar Lindstein
STIM IPI: 572 393 237
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