June 23, 2025 • 19 mins
Are you the youngest child who’s always been seen as “the fun one”—but never quite taken seriously? In this episode of Not Your Therapist, we’re breaking down the psychology of the youngest child: how being the “baby” of the family shapes your personality, relationships, and sense of identity.
We explore how youngest kids often become the entertainer or escape artist, the impact of being underestimated, and how this birth order role can lead to charm, deflection, and hidden pressure to prove yourself in adulthood. It’s not all fun and games when you’re secretly tired of being seen as “the irresponsible one.”
Whether you’re the family wildcard or the secretly exhausted youngest, this episode will help you unpack what you inherited—and how to outgrow it.
👉 Ask me a question or suggest a topic hello@kaylareilly.com
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Transcript
Episode Transcript
Available transcripts are automatically generated. Complete accuracy is not guaranteed.
Speaker 1 (00:00):
Y'all, this is episode three.
Four, episode four of our is itfour?
Yes, okay, episode four of thebirth order little series that
I'm doing about why birth ordermatters.
That we did the eldest child,then we talked about the middle
child, now we're going to talkabout the youngest child, aka
(00:24):
the baby of the family.
If you're the baby of thefamily, you were born into a
different world and it shows, solet's hop on into it.
I'm excited about this one,mainly because I've had three
cups of coffee and I'm a littlejazzed.
Woo, let's do it.
(00:50):
By the time you showed up as thebaby in the family, your
parents were tired, they weredistracted, they were spread
thin and maybe even a littleover it.
You had fewer rules, youprobably had less structure and
way more flexibility, and yougot more attention and
(01:13):
indulgence from older siblingsand parents.
So babies always get lots ofattention from parents because
they're babies, they're so cuteand other people, but also you
had older siblings that wereprobably doting on you and
giving you attention as well.
However, that attention andthat doting and that indulgence
(01:35):
probably came with a hidden costof being underestimated.
You were probably dismissed alot or babied even long after
you grew up, you were the funone, the comic relief, the
adorable wild card.
But were you ever takenseriously?
Probably not.
(01:56):
Now, listen, I am married to ababy.
I don't mean I don't mean anactual, I don't mean an actual
baby, or do I Listen?
He's a man, so there's that.
And he is the youngest of four,so he definitely has this like
(02:20):
people underestimate him anddon't take him seriously kind of
a thing.
But he also projects a lot oflike fun, silly vibes.
Let's talk a little bit moreabout the psychology of this of
being the youngest child.
So research shows that youngestchildren are more likely to be
creative, charismatic, veryrisk-taking.
(02:42):
They're attention-seekingbecause it worked.
It worked when they werechildren, right.
They are typically sociallysavvy and sometimes very
manipulative.
So don't lie.
You know that.
You know how to cry on cue orget what you want.
Won't Just come on.
Cry on cue or get what you want, won't Just come on, admit it.
(03:06):
And also, here's a darker sideright, you're more likely to be
coddled or seen as less capableor less likely to develop a
strong internal structure orsense of personal responsibility
, because being irresponsibleand coddled and babied is
reinforcing you beingirresponsible, right.
(03:28):
And sometimes you secretlystruggle with a lot of
self-doubt.
So if you got to be the baby,you probably have a part of you
that still feels very stuckthere in that babyhood.
So let's talk about what youlearn to do and what that cost
(03:50):
you.
You might have learned andremember when we talked in the
previous couple of episodes.
If you haven't listened to them, go listen to them.
It's going to benefit you,trust me.
I want you to think about thebirth order of your parents, the
birth order of your partner,the birth order of your children
, right?
This stuff matters.
So getting a deep understandingof, let's say, the eldest, even
(04:13):
if you're not the eldest, isgoing to help you, and I talk
about stuff like classicconditioning and all that stuff.
But anyways, okay.
So this is what was reinforcedin you Humor equals safety,
right.
If you're funny, if youentertain, if you're like the
clown, you're safe.
You also probably learned andgot reinforced that if you
(04:36):
messed up, someone else wouldclean it up.
You also probably learned,right, the three big hitters
Humor is safety.
If you mess up, someone else isgoing to clean it up, or you've
got like some kind of a safetynet and that people don't expect
much of you and that can beboth freeing and also insulting
(04:58):
at the same time.
It's a little bit of aconundrum.
So sometimes you probably leaninto or leaned into sure I'll be
the fun one, and other timesyou tried so hard to be taken
seriously and still felt like noone listened, which can be
patronizing and frustrating andreally, really infuriating.
(05:22):
It might create a lot ofresentment, so you might look
carefree, but underneath you'reprobably exhausted from trying
to prove that you're more thanjust the fun one.
So how this might show up inadulthood for you.
In your relationships you mightrely on charm or deflection
(05:43):
instead of emotionalvulnerability.
And man, me and my husbandstruggle with this because
anytime I try to connect withhim he makes a joke because
that's his default right it's tobe funny and silly and goofy,
which is a lot of fun.
I love that about him.
People really like him.
(06:04):
He's so charismatic and it'svery frustrating for me because
I want seriousness, I wantconnection in a deeper way, I
want to feel closeness with him,and humor is a way of keeping
people farther away.
It's a way of being guarded.
So a lot of times this humor orcharm that deflects emotional
(06:36):
vulnerability can really be abad thing, a weakness for you in
your adult relationships.
It probably served you as thebaby growing up, but now not so
much.
Another way this might show upin adulthood is expecting others
to take care of logistics andhard stuff, and you might not do
(06:58):
that explicitly, but you mightimplicitly do that.
So mental load is a thing for alot of your partners probably a
lot of your partners probably.
So this pattern might show upin your relationships where
you're kind of putting theresponsibility of making
decisions and what to do and howto do it and when to do it on
(07:22):
your partner, and your partnerprobably feels burdened and
stressed out because you areimplicitly kind of pushing the
responsibility on to them.
Now you might also overcorrectby becoming hyper independent to
escape the baby label.
(07:43):
This is what my younger sisterdid.
Sorry, lex, I'm telling on youbut she very much like
overcorrects and very hyperindependent, doesn't need
anybody and is really trying toprove herself, um, to try to get
away from, like the babyness,the baby label.
(08:04):
Uh, at work.
The way this might show up isyou're probably creative, you're
charismatic, but you mightdoubt your leadership skills and
you might also secretly cravestructure but also resist it.
So it is this like the babyusually struggles with these
(08:28):
double edged swords a lot oftimes, right, like you want to
be taken seriously but also youput responsibility on other
people.
You crave structure but alsoyou don't want to be in
structure and you fight it.
So it's a lot of these littlelike dialectics to opposing
things.
(08:48):
So it's kind of like a constantbattle for the baby.
So with family, I say the baby,the youngest, the baby that
might be insulting.
I could see how that would be astruggle for a lot of the
youngest children.
It's just the term baby, butI'm going to use it anyways
because that's what I think ofwhen I think of this dynamic.
Okay, so in your family oforigin you're still probably the
(09:12):
one everyone jokes about, evenif you've evolved past the baby
role.
That's very much how my husbandis.
I don't know why, but everyonein his family has this urge to
tell embarrassing stories aboutmy husband.
So anytime we're around familythey're constantly telling
(09:35):
stories and laughing abouteither things he did bad or
things he did that were sillyand goofy, and like it just
keeps him stuck in this role andalso it can be incredibly
patronizing.
He doesn't take it as seriouslybecause he's used to it, but I
definitely see the implicit waythat it impacts him.
(09:56):
So another thing with yourfamily of origin is you might
feel like people don't fullyrespect your boundaries or your
authority because they don'ttake you seriously.
I see this very much with mysister.
I can definitely see how nobodyreally respects her boundaries
(10:16):
or authority.
They just kind of, you know,laugh it off or slough it off.
It's like, oh, she'll be okayand that's hurtful, okay.
So signs that you might bestuck in this youngest role,
which you're already probablyrealizing.
If you downplay serious emotions, like with jokes, with humor
(10:38):
deflecting, maybe you wait forsomeone else to take charge or
you feel resentful when theydon't.
You crave validation but youresist accountability.
This is a big one, remember Iwas talking about those
double-edged swords.
Dialectics just means twoopposing forces, right?
Two opposing forces.
(10:58):
So craving validation, but youdon't want to take
accountability Because, remember, when we talked about
conditioning, you werereinforced for being
irresponsible.
So why would you takeaccountability?
That's not your MO, right?
So in order to get validation,you have to take accountability
(11:20):
for yourself.
So it's really interesting this, being the youngest, is full of
these opposing forces.
Another one is you feelunderestimated in your family or
belittled in your family, evenit's probably still to this day.
The youngest child might growup, but the role never retires.
(11:43):
Do you know what I'm saying?
Like you might very much begrown up, but the role of being
the youngest and being the babyin the family is going to be
there, especially if you allowyourself to sink back into it.
So here's how I want you toreclaim your power.
I want you to try to lean intoletting go of the need to be
(12:08):
liked and focus on beingrespected.
Liked and focus on beingrespected.
So, instead of everyone likingyou all the time and this is
hard for the baby when peopleare mad at you or like
expressing a different opinion,like you're really nervous,
anxious, uncomfortable withgoing against the grain because
(12:30):
it's very much outside of yourrole.
But if you don't go outside ofthe grain and you don't express
your opinions and you don't takeyourself seriously or tell
people that things hurt yourfeelings, you're never going to
be respected.
So when you have the urge to dosomething, ask yourself am I
(12:50):
doing this to be liked?
And what's more important to me, to be liked or to be respected
?
Now another thing that you cando to reclaim your power and
really break out of this role isto practice making clear
decisions without waiting forsomeone older, wiser, whatever
(13:12):
it doesn't even have to besomeone older or wiser.
Without waiting for someoneolder, wiser, whatever, it
doesn't even have to be someoneolder or wiser.
Without waiting for somebodyelse to co-sign or give you
approval or make that decisionfor you.
So my husband slips into this alot where he'll make a decision
like, hey, I'm going to do thisfor the kids, is that okay?
Okay, and so he's looking forme to sign off and it's like, of
(13:36):
course it's okay.
Like you're the parent, you'remaking a decision.
I'm not involved at all, I 100%support you and I remind him of
that a lot.
Right, like, hey, you'redoubting yourself, and I know
it's kind of a fine line becauseyou can easily say, oh well,
I'm trying to co-parent with youor I'm trying to, you know, be
(13:56):
collaborative.
But there really is a cleardifference when you evaluate
your intention, right, there'san intention behind it.
If you are intentionally beingcollaborative and co-parenting
with someone, great, or beingmarried, whatever, you know,
(14:18):
deciding on dinner, whatever butmake sure that that's your
intention, not, hey, I am makinga decision but then I have to
check to make sure that's okay,because I need validation or I'm
seeking that approval or I'mfeeling anxious, right, that's
that lack of intention.
So I know that's a nuanceddistinction, but you'll feel it
(14:45):
when you practice making cleardecisions.
You want to kind of lean intoavoiding the need to get someone
to co-sign or approve it.
Get someone to co-sign orapprove it.
Now the last way that I suggestyou try to reclaim your power
and lean into this grown role isto get comfortable with being
(15:10):
serious and assertive.
And seen, I would say, assertivecommunication skills are
probably the one that I seelacking the most in adults who
are the youngest in their family.
They either are very, verypassive and silly and goofy or
(15:31):
quiet, or they have flown allthe way to the opposite end of
the pendulum and they areaggressive, right.
So I talk about this a lot,where skills, interpersonal
skills or personality traits arealways on a spectrum.
So I kind of imagine it as likea ball hanging from whatever on
(15:56):
a string, a little pendulumright Swinging and right in the
middle is where we want to beand one side of the so like.
Take assertiveness, for example, assertiveness is in the middle
and then way on the left handside is being passive and silly.
And you know, or passive orsilly or quiet or whatever, and
(16:20):
then all the way on the otherside, on the right side, is
being aggressive or curt orabrasive.
Now, what we're aiming for hereis to be assertive.
Assertiveness craves calm.
Assertiveness craves clarity.
Assertiveness is all aboutexpressing your needs but then
(16:46):
not dominating.
So I think becoming comfortable, being serious can be really
uncomfortable for those who wereraised as being a clown and
playing off feelings.
It's a way of being guarded,right, it's just a different way
of being guarded.
Whereas the middle child isusually guarded by being
(17:07):
defensive or shut down orwithdrawn or avoidant, the baby
is usually guarded by beinggoofy and silly and joking and
sarcastic guarded by being goofyand silly and joking and
sarcastic.
Okay, here's a littleaffirmation or mantra for you I
am not just the youngest, I'mwise, I'm capable and I'm worthy
(17:28):
of being taken seriously.
Okay, being the youngest shapedhow you saw yourself and how
others saw you and also see youto this day.
But you don't have to live inthat role anymore.
You're allowed to lead, you'reallowed to speak up and you're
allowed to be taken seriously,even if no one expected that
(17:49):
from you before.
It's uncomfortable breaking outof your role, but you can do it
and remember that it's bestwhen done in small doses.
It's easier to sustain smallchanges than to try to change
everything all at once.
So try to lean into thisassertive, accountable kind of
(18:10):
version of yourself slowly butsurely, and I promise it's going
to get easier.
I promise it's going to shifthow you are in relationships.
It's also going to shift howpeople see you in the
relationships.
So thanks for hanging with methrough this birth order series
so far.
I'm going to do one more.
I'm going to do the only child,because I think it's a unique
(18:33):
situation and it's worth its ownepisode.
All right, so I will catch younext week and until then, be
well.
And if you want to connect withme, hop on over to Kayla
Rileycom or check me out onsocials.
My I'm on Tik TOK and Instagramthe most and my handle now is
private practice with Kayla.
(18:54):
All right, be good.
See you next time, okay, bye.
Y'all, this is episode three.
Four, episode four of our is itfour?
Yes, okay, episode four of thebirth order little series that
I'm doing about why birth ordermatters.
That we did the eldest child,then we talked about the middle
child, now we're going to talkabout the youngest child, aka
(00:24):
the baby of the family.
If you're the baby of thefamily, you were born into a
different world and it shows, solet's hop on into it.
I'm excited about this one,mainly because I've had three
cups of coffee and I'm a littlejazzed.
Woo, let's do it.
(00:50):
By the time you showed up as thebaby in the family, your
parents were tired, they weredistracted, they were spread
thin and maybe even a littleover it.
You had fewer rules, youprobably had less structure and
way more flexibility, and yougot more attention and
(01:13):
indulgence from older siblingsand parents.
So babies always get lots ofattention from parents because
they're babies, they're so cuteand other people, but also you
had older siblings that wereprobably doting on you and
giving you attention as well.
However, that attention andthat doting and that indulgence
(01:35):
probably came with a hidden costof being underestimated.
You were probably dismissed alot or babied even long after
you grew up, you were the funone, the comic relief, the
adorable wild card.
But were you ever takenseriously?
Probably not.
(01:56):
Now, listen, I am married to ababy.
I don't mean I don't mean anactual, I don't mean an actual
baby, or do I Listen?
He's a man, so there's that.
And he is the youngest of four,so he definitely has this like
(02:20):
people underestimate him anddon't take him seriously kind of
a thing.
But he also projects a lot oflike fun, silly vibes.
Let's talk a little bit moreabout the psychology of this of
being the youngest child.
So research shows that youngestchildren are more likely to be
creative, charismatic, veryrisk-taking.
(02:42):
They're attention-seekingbecause it worked.
It worked when they werechildren, right.
They are typically sociallysavvy and sometimes very
manipulative.
So don't lie.
You know that.
You know how to cry on cue orget what you want.
Won't Just come on.
Cry on cue or get what you want, won't Just come on, admit it.
(03:06):
And also, here's a darker sideright, you're more likely to be
coddled or seen as less capableor less likely to develop a
strong internal structure orsense of personal responsibility
, because being irresponsibleand coddled and babied is
reinforcing you beingirresponsible, right.
(03:28):
And sometimes you secretlystruggle with a lot of
self-doubt.
So if you got to be the baby,you probably have a part of you
that still feels very stuckthere in that babyhood.
So let's talk about what youlearn to do and what that cost
(03:50):
you.
You might have learned andremember when we talked in the
previous couple of episodes.
If you haven't listened to them, go listen to them.
It's going to benefit you,trust me.
I want you to think about thebirth order of your parents, the
birth order of your partner,the birth order of your children
, right?
This stuff matters.
So getting a deep understandingof, let's say, the eldest, even
(04:13):
if you're not the eldest, isgoing to help you, and I talk
about stuff like classicconditioning and all that stuff.
But anyways, okay.
So this is what was reinforcedin you Humor equals safety,
right.
If you're funny, if youentertain, if you're like the
clown, you're safe.
You also probably learned andgot reinforced that if you
(04:36):
messed up, someone else wouldclean it up.
You also probably learned,right, the three big hitters
Humor is safety.
If you mess up, someone else isgoing to clean it up, or you've
got like some kind of a safetynet and that people don't expect
much of you and that can beboth freeing and also insulting
(04:58):
at the same time.
It's a little bit of aconundrum.
So sometimes you probably leaninto or leaned into sure I'll be
the fun one, and other timesyou tried so hard to be taken
seriously and still felt like noone listened, which can be
patronizing and frustrating andreally, really infuriating.
(05:22):
It might create a lot ofresentment, so you might look
carefree, but underneath you'reprobably exhausted from trying
to prove that you're more thanjust the fun one.
So how this might show up inadulthood for you.
In your relationships you mightrely on charm or deflection
(05:43):
instead of emotionalvulnerability.
And man, me and my husbandstruggle with this because
anytime I try to connect withhim he makes a joke because
that's his default right it's tobe funny and silly and goofy,
which is a lot of fun.
I love that about him.
People really like him.
(06:04):
He's so charismatic and it'svery frustrating for me because
I want seriousness, I wantconnection in a deeper way, I
want to feel closeness with him,and humor is a way of keeping
people farther away.
It's a way of being guarded.
So a lot of times this humor orcharm that deflects emotional
(06:36):
vulnerability can really be abad thing, a weakness for you in
your adult relationships.
It probably served you as thebaby growing up, but now not so
much.
Another way this might show upin adulthood is expecting others
to take care of logistics andhard stuff, and you might not do
(06:58):
that explicitly, but you mightimplicitly do that.
So mental load is a thing for alot of your partners probably a
lot of your partners probably.
So this pattern might show upin your relationships where
you're kind of putting theresponsibility of making
decisions and what to do and howto do it and when to do it on
(07:22):
your partner, and your partnerprobably feels burdened and
stressed out because you areimplicitly kind of pushing the
responsibility on to them.
Now you might also overcorrectby becoming hyper independent to
escape the baby label.
(07:43):
This is what my younger sisterdid.
Sorry, lex, I'm telling on youbut she very much like
overcorrects and very hyperindependent, doesn't need
anybody and is really trying toprove herself, um, to try to get
away from, like the babyness,the baby label.
(08:04):
Uh, at work.
The way this might show up isyou're probably creative, you're
charismatic, but you mightdoubt your leadership skills and
you might also secretly cravestructure but also resist it.
So it is this like the babyusually struggles with these
(08:28):
double edged swords a lot oftimes, right, like you want to
be taken seriously but also youput responsibility on other
people.
You crave structure but alsoyou don't want to be in
structure and you fight it.
So it's a lot of these littlelike dialectics to opposing
things.
(08:48):
So it's kind of like a constantbattle for the baby.
So with family, I say the baby,the youngest, the baby that
might be insulting.
I could see how that would be astruggle for a lot of the
youngest children.
It's just the term baby, butI'm going to use it anyways
because that's what I think ofwhen I think of this dynamic.
Okay, so in your family oforigin you're still probably the
(09:12):
one everyone jokes about, evenif you've evolved past the baby
role.
That's very much how my husbandis.
I don't know why, but everyonein his family has this urge to
tell embarrassing stories aboutmy husband.
So anytime we're around familythey're constantly telling
(09:35):
stories and laughing abouteither things he did bad or
things he did that were sillyand goofy, and like it just
keeps him stuck in this role andalso it can be incredibly
patronizing.
He doesn't take it as seriouslybecause he's used to it, but I
definitely see the implicit waythat it impacts him.
(09:56):
So another thing with yourfamily of origin is you might
feel like people don't fullyrespect your boundaries or your
authority because they don'ttake you seriously.
I see this very much with mysister.
I can definitely see how nobodyreally respects her boundaries
(10:16):
or authority.
They just kind of, you know,laugh it off or slough it off.
It's like, oh, she'll be okayand that's hurtful, okay.
So signs that you might bestuck in this youngest role,
which you're already probablyrealizing.
If you downplay serious emotions, like with jokes, with humor
(10:38):
deflecting, maybe you wait forsomeone else to take charge or
you feel resentful when theydon't.
You crave validation but youresist accountability.
This is a big one, remember Iwas talking about those
double-edged swords.
Dialectics just means twoopposing forces, right?
Two opposing forces.
(10:58):
So craving validation, but youdon't want to take
accountability Because, remember, when we talked about
conditioning, you werereinforced for being
irresponsible.
So why would you takeaccountability?
That's not your MO, right?
So in order to get validation,you have to take accountability
(11:20):
for yourself.
So it's really interesting this, being the youngest, is full of
these opposing forces.
Another one is you feelunderestimated in your family or
belittled in your family, evenit's probably still to this day.
The youngest child might growup, but the role never retires.
(11:43):
Do you know what I'm saying?
Like you might very much begrown up, but the role of being
the youngest and being the babyin the family is going to be
there, especially if you allowyourself to sink back into it.
So here's how I want you toreclaim your power.
I want you to try to lean intoletting go of the need to be
(12:08):
liked and focus on beingrespected.
Liked and focus on beingrespected.
So, instead of everyone likingyou all the time and this is
hard for the baby when peopleare mad at you or like
expressing a different opinion,like you're really nervous,
anxious, uncomfortable withgoing against the grain because
(12:30):
it's very much outside of yourrole.
But if you don't go outside ofthe grain and you don't express
your opinions and you don't takeyourself seriously or tell
people that things hurt yourfeelings, you're never going to
be respected.
So when you have the urge to dosomething, ask yourself am I
(12:50):
doing this to be liked?
And what's more important to me, to be liked or to be respected
?
Now another thing that you cando to reclaim your power and
really break out of this role isto practice making clear
decisions without waiting forsomeone older, wiser, whatever
(13:12):
it doesn't even have to besomeone older or wiser.
Without waiting for someoneolder, wiser, whatever, it
doesn't even have to be someoneolder or wiser.
Without waiting for somebodyelse to co-sign or give you
approval or make that decisionfor you.
So my husband slips into this alot where he'll make a decision
like, hey, I'm going to do thisfor the kids, is that okay?
Okay, and so he's looking forme to sign off and it's like, of
(13:36):
course it's okay.
Like you're the parent, you'remaking a decision.
I'm not involved at all, I 100%support you and I remind him of
that a lot.
Right, like, hey, you'redoubting yourself, and I know
it's kind of a fine line becauseyou can easily say, oh well,
I'm trying to co-parent with youor I'm trying to, you know, be
(13:56):
collaborative.
But there really is a cleardifference when you evaluate
your intention, right, there'san intention behind it.
If you are intentionally beingcollaborative and co-parenting
with someone, great, or beingmarried, whatever, you know,
(14:18):
deciding on dinner, whatever butmake sure that that's your
intention, not, hey, I am makinga decision but then I have to
check to make sure that's okay,because I need validation or I'm
seeking that approval or I'mfeeling anxious, right, that's
that lack of intention.
So I know that's a nuanceddistinction, but you'll feel it
(14:45):
when you practice making cleardecisions.
You want to kind of lean intoavoiding the need to get someone
to co-sign or approve it.
Get someone to co-sign orapprove it.
Now the last way that I suggestyou try to reclaim your power
and lean into this grown role isto get comfortable with being
(15:10):
serious and assertive.
And seen, I would say, assertivecommunication skills are
probably the one that I seelacking the most in adults who
are the youngest in their family.
They either are very, verypassive and silly and goofy or
(15:31):
quiet, or they have flown allthe way to the opposite end of
the pendulum and they areaggressive, right.
So I talk about this a lot,where skills, interpersonal
skills or personality traits arealways on a spectrum.
So I kind of imagine it as likea ball hanging from whatever on
(15:56):
a string, a little pendulumright Swinging and right in the
middle is where we want to beand one side of the so like.
Take assertiveness, for example, assertiveness is in the middle
and then way on the left handside is being passive and silly.
And you know, or passive orsilly or quiet or whatever, and
(16:20):
then all the way on the otherside, on the right side, is
being aggressive or curt orabrasive.
Now, what we're aiming for hereis to be assertive.
Assertiveness craves calm.
Assertiveness craves clarity.
Assertiveness is all aboutexpressing your needs but then
(16:46):
not dominating.
So I think becoming comfortable, being serious can be really
uncomfortable for those who wereraised as being a clown and
playing off feelings.
It's a way of being guarded,right, it's just a different way
of being guarded.
Whereas the middle child isusually guarded by being
(17:07):
defensive or shut down orwithdrawn or avoidant, the baby
is usually guarded by beinggoofy and silly and joking and
sarcastic guarded by being goofyand silly and joking and
sarcastic.
Okay, here's a littleaffirmation or mantra for you I
am not just the youngest, I'mwise, I'm capable and I'm worthy
(17:28):
of being taken seriously.
Okay, being the youngest shapedhow you saw yourself and how
others saw you and also see youto this day.
But you don't have to live inthat role anymore.
You're allowed to lead, you'reallowed to speak up and you're
allowed to be taken seriously,even if no one expected that
(17:49):
from you before.
It's uncomfortable breaking outof your role, but you can do it
and remember that it's bestwhen done in small doses.
It's easier to sustain smallchanges than to try to change
everything all at once.
So try to lean into thisassertive, accountable kind of
(18:10):
version of yourself slowly butsurely, and I promise it's going
to get easier.
I promise it's going to shifthow you are in relationships.
It's also going to shift howpeople see you in the
relationships.
So thanks for hanging with methrough this birth order series
so far.
I'm going to do one more.
I'm going to do the only child,because I think it's a unique
(18:33):
situation and it's worth its ownepisode.
All right, so I will catch younext week and until then, be
well.
And if you want to connect withme, hop on over to Kayla
Rileycom or check me out onsocials.
My I'm on Tik TOK and Instagramthe most and my handle now is
private practice with Kayla.
(18:54):
All right, be good.
See you next time, okay, bye.
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