As a former Marine ReconScout Sniper, I've weathered storms both literal and metaphorical, but nothing quite mirrors the tempest of reintegration that veterans face. Sean Duclay from Sail Ahead joins me, your host Thad David, to navigate these choppy waters, revealing how sailing provides a lifeline to veterans adrift in the civilian world. We set sail on a remarkable voyage where Sean charts the course of Sail Ahead's origin, its impactful mission, and the community's fervent support that's been the wind in its sails, touching over 4,000 veterans' lives.
The tales we share are as vast and deep as the ocean itself, from the poignant visual of 219 name tags honoring fallen heroes to the stirring accounts of veterans reclaiming their sense of purpose at sea. Through Sean's eyes, we glimpse the profound tributes paid to these warriors, the comradery found on deck, and the aspiration to reach further shores and touch more lives. It's an odyssey of remembrance, healing, and the unwavering resolve to combat the veteran suicide crisis—one sail at a time.
Hoisting the mainsail, we then tack towards the very heart of what makes Sail Ahead a sanctum for solace and strength. Stories unfurl like sails in the wind, capturing the raw emotion and therapeutic breakthroughs that occur amidst the waves. You'll hear about the seamless teamwork, the cathartic conversations, and the sense of belonging fostered through this unique sailing community. It's more than a sport; it's a vessel of hope, where veterans and their families find camaraderie, healing, and a new direction in life's vast ocean. Join us on this passionate pursuit to set new courses for veteran support and discover the ripple effects of change, one sail at a time.
Check out there website and support Sail Ahead:
https://www.sailahead.org/
Contact Thad - VictoriousVeteranProject@Gmail.com
Thanks for listening!
Mark as Played
Transcript
Episode Transcript
Available transcripts are automatically generated. Complete accuracy is not guaranteed.
Sean Duclay (00:00):
Well, especially if you think about the people that
have never been on a boatbefore and suddenly like, let's
assume we're in windy conditionsand it's wavy, you don't.
Something that maybe a lot ofpeople don't think about, who
have never gone sailing, is thatwe're propelled by the wind and
the boat heals over, but that'stotally normal, but it can be
(00:22):
healed over, you know, 10degrees, 20, 30 degrees, uh, 45
degrees if you have a lot ofwind, and that's just very
unnatural for our floors to be45 degrees.
So, a lot of people.
It's scary, you know.
You see the railing of the boatthat gets buried under the
water as it's rushing past andall you can hear is the loud
wind and the waves um in the.
(00:44):
For someone new, it's eitherexhilarating or it's terrifying,
but afterwards you survive andthen you're like dang, I did
that, you know we did that, andthat was like wow, that was
incredible.
Thad David (00:59):
My name is Thad David.
I'm a former Marine recon scoutsniper with two deployments to
Iraq.
As a civilian, I've nowfacilitated hundreds of personal
and professional developmenttrainings across the country,
and it struck me recently thatthe same things that help
civilians will also helpveterans succeed in their new
roles as well.
Join me as we define civiliansuccess principles to inspire
(01:20):
veteran victories.
Welcome to another episode.
I'm here today with Sean Duclayof Sail Ahead.
How are you doing, sean?
I'm doing well.
Thank you, thad.
How are you, man?
I'm excellent.
I'm very excited.
I know somebody reached out andlinked us up together, and when
I heard about all the thingsthat you do currently and
everything you've been doing forquite some time, it's
(01:41):
fascinating to think about allthe good work you and your
brother are doing.
Sean Duclay (01:50):
So I'm excited to jump in and share it.
Well, thank you.
Yeah, I love every opportunityto talk about it, so this is
just as fun for me as it is foryou, I'm sure.
Thad David (01:54):
It's excellent and just to let everybody know right
away, on a sale ahead, you andyour brother started it.
You were 14, your brother was16.
Just for anybody that doesn'tknow anybody listening what is
Sail Ahead Sure?
Sean Duclay (02:07):
So Sail Ahead is, as you said, is, an organization
my brother and I started whenwe were 14 and 16.
And it started with a verybasic premise.
As a family we've been sailingour whole lives.
My parents even have a storywhere my brother Killian, when
he was in the cradle as baby,they put him on the high side of
the sailboat as ballast toflatten it out.
(02:29):
So we've always been on thewater and for myself and my
brother Killian it was alwaystherapeutic.
My brother would say he wouldalways forget about the math
test he just flunked when wewere out on the water.
So when we were 14 and 16, onemorning getting ready to go to
school, we heard on our localnews channel that at least that
(02:52):
the VA had produced a study thatwas saying at least 22 veterans
die by suicide every day, whichwe know is actually really an
underrepresentation of thereality that there's over 70,000
veterans in our county ofSuffolk County and many, many,
many homeless veterans in NewYork City, which is in our
backyard, etc.
(03:12):
So we were shocked by this.
We were disturbed by this, sowe decided to take it into our
own hands and we invited aVietnam veteran sailing with us
At the time we were sailing inthe winter out of Oyster Bay on
dinghies and not a recipe forsuccess, if you take an older
(03:33):
gentleman, a veteran, sailing inthe winter on a dinghy.
So he actually asked us to cutthe sail short, which we did,
but nevertheless, when we gotback to the beach he gave us
both a hug.
He started crying, so westarted crying and he told us
that in the 20 years that he wasgoing to therapy for his PTSD,
that was the best therapy heever had.
So we sort of you know we setout to do good.
(03:54):
We just didn't realize how muchof an impact we could have had.
And the second we realized, youknow, the potential that
sailing had on helping people.
There was no decision to bemade.
We just started devising planshow to maximize our impact, how
(04:16):
to connect the sailing worldwith the veteran world.
And it's been 10 years now.
Sail Ahead is my full-time joband we've taken over 4,000
veterans sailing.
Thad David (04:28):
Over how many veterans sailing 4,000.
4,000.
That's an impressive,impressive number, especially
for taking it on at such a youngage.
I think about what I was doingat the age of 14, and it was
definitely not something asimpactful as this, so it's
really fascinating to hear about.
Sean Duclay (04:47):
I think we definitely benefited from being
young in some ways, because thecommunity, you know, they saw
what we were trying to do.
They saw that we had someunique ideas and so they really
were very, very helpful.
You know, a bunch of differentsectors of our community were
very much behind us and theywanted to see us succeed.
So there was some advantage tobeing young.
(05:09):
A story I like to tell is oneof the ways we try to diversify
to take veterans sailing asopposed to just taking them on
our boat.
On our boats is we approach ayacht club, the Centerport Yacht
Club.
On our boats is we approach theyacht club, the Centerport
Yacht Club, which is the yachtclub that this year will be the
(05:29):
eighth year that we partner withthem for a big event, and the
biggest event we've had withthem featured 54 sailboats and
two helicopters.
And it all started because oneday kind of knocked on their
door and the pitch was this hey,can we use your facilities,
(05:50):
your sailors and their boats andtake a bunch of veterans
sailing?
And oh, yeah, can you pay foreverything and maybe we can get
some burgers too?
So they said yes, and you knowit's shocking but it's a
testament to.
Uh, I think a lot of peoplereally just want to do good.
They just don't know exactlyhow you know.
So you make it easy for them onhow they can help and they'll
(06:13):
be eager to jump on thatopportunity.
So, uh, so this has become atradition and the centerport
yacht club wants to do thisevery year for as long as they
exist.
So it's been immenselysuccessful.
We know, with just that eventwe organize six every year, but
with just that event we've savedsome lives.
So you know, it's a greatfeeling.
(06:34):
Everyone has a sense of beingon the same team, of working
towards something bigger, and sothat's what I mean Like the
community really supported us.
We don't really see it as us byourselves doing all this.
We've had just last year we had, like, I think, 80 boat owners
that volunteered throughout theyear.
So you know, it's a wholecommunity that's really behind
(06:57):
us.
Thad David (06:58):
That's fascinating and I really appreciate your
comment that I think might bejust a little bit opposite of
what some other people would say, but you said a lot of people
really just want to help.
They have good in their heartand they just don't know where
to help and you're justproviding that opportunity for
it and what a beautiful way oflooking at life and that's
(07:21):
fascinating.
So you're now going to do that.
One specific one.
You said every year it takesplace every year.
Sean Duclay (07:26):
Yeah, this year 2024, will be the eighth year we
do it with the Center for YachtClub.
Okay, and we do it every yearand so, beyond just having one
event with the Center for YachtClub, it's the biggest event
Sail Ahead does every year.
A lot of the skippers go on totake veterans sailing during
weekly races or just privatelyon their boats on weekends, and
(07:48):
so we view our role in someregard as being kind of some
sort of a broker where weconnect veterans with skippers
and sailors and we try to matchby personality and age and
things like that, so that theycan get along and hopefully they
do, and then the relationshipyou know lives on without us
(08:11):
having to be involved.
Thad David (08:13):
Wow.
So y'all are, I mean, on top ofhosting these events.
Your end goal is to help getveterans paired up, matched up
with other people that they cango sailing with long term and
hopefully have that I mean, itsounds like in some cases could
be a lifelong friendship thatthey're creating yeah, yeah, I
mean, we have that.
Sean Duclay (08:31):
We have some some incredible stories of, uh, of
there's, there's, uh one skipperwho is also a vietnam veteran.
Uh, he's a double purple heartrecipient and he told us that
the way he characterized hisexperience in Vietnam is I think
he spent 280-some days playinghide-and-seek and twice he was
(08:52):
found.
But he's someone who neverreally talked about his
experience and like never, notto his family, not to us, even
though we've known him for years, and like never not to his
family, not to us, even thoughwe've known him for years.
And then one day, one of theseevents at the Center for Yacht
Club, we had on his boat a youngMarine Corps captain who was in
(09:13):
Afghanistan and Iraq, and thatwas the very first time where
the Vietnam veteran opened upabout his experience was on that
boat that day, and it wasbecause he thought that by
sharing his experience he wouldhelp the younger generation,
which he did, and they were ableto connect over some shared
(09:33):
adversity.
And you know, like, basically,that has nothing really to do
with me, except that we createdthe conditions that that could
take place, but it's magical,you know, that's really really
cool, something we're reallyhappy about and proud of, you
know.
Thad David (09:49):
You should be very proud of it and I love you're
leading the way with humility.
You know you're really I meanyou're brokering all of it and
you're giving out all thecredits to everybody else and
it's really a magical thing.
It's wonderful.
It's a breath of fresh air tobe able to speak with you about
it.
I love that and you mentionedearlier.
Thank you for sharing any otherstories like that.
(10:11):
Share along the way, because Ilove to hear about that stuff.
Did you mention and I want tomake sure I heard it right that
you do that was one of sixevents that y'all do every year.
Sean Duclay (10:20):
Yes.
So what are the other eventsthat you do.
So we partner with a bunch ofyacht clubs around Long Island.
So, to name a few, there's theSeacliff Yacht Club, the
Centerport Yacht Club, theSagamore Yacht Club, babylon
Yacht Club.
We also have an event inBuffalo Harbor and also,
(10:42):
pre-pandemic, we had since 2017until the pandemic, we had
events every year in Tacoma,washington, for the Ranger
Battalion over there.
Okay, and the reason being isbecause one of our missions at
Sailorhead is to honor andremember our mates, and I'll
show you our mates.
These are our mates.
(11:03):
They're the name tag Over 219veterans who've died by suicide.
So if we go back to the originof Sail Ahead, the statistic of
22 a day 219 is one short of 220.
So these are the self-inflictedcasualties in the United States
(11:25):
every 10 days, and we carry ourmates with us wherever we go,
for a number of reasons.
One is kind of the shock factorFor people who don't have any
concept of what's going on inthe military community.
This is the same 22 a day.
People might associate it witha push-up challenge or something
(11:47):
like that, but these are realhuman lives represented by name
tags.
Behind every one of theseveterans there's a family that's
suffered.
So one of our mates his name isRyan James Day.
He's a US Army Ranger.
He was 21 when he took his lifeand he was stationed in
Washington, in Tacoma.
(12:08):
So our event there was in honorof him and another Ranger, matt
Wilson, who also took his life,and the whole point is bring
the Ranger community togetherfor a day of fun.
We don't want to make anyonetoo sad by talking about these
realities, but they are.
It is a reality, so we have totalk about it.
(12:29):
But we also make the day aboutfun and healing and connectivity
.
Thad David (12:35):
So that's what, excuse me, no, you're good.
I mean just for anybody that,if you're listening to this only
and you weren't able to see itSean actually held up you said
210 name tags.
I mean it's 219.
It's a.
I mean it really hits you whenyou see that.
I mean you.
(12:58):
I know that was the point of itwhen you say 22 a day, but when
you actually hold that up andyou see all those name tags that
it's that's very powerful.
Sean Duclay (13:10):
Those name tags, that it's that's very powerful.
Yeah and uh.
And so we started with 219 nametags and the one that's missing
, you know, uh, 22 a day times10 days is 220.
The one that's missingrepresents the life that we try
to save.
Um, last, uh, through our work,we've met many more veterans
who have friends who have diedby suicide, so we now have more
than 219, but that's the numberwe started with and uh, and the
(13:33):
incredible the thing is that, uh, you know it's a symbol, but
it's also real.
These are real human lives thatI'm holding in my hands right
now through these name tags, andthe reason I say that is
because we went sailing withthem years ago, when we first
had them duplicated, and so Itook a selfie of a name tag that
(13:58):
says shampoo and that's a womanwho.
She took her life at a veryyoung age, and I took a selfie
with her and I sent it to hermom and her mom said oh, wow,
you know my daughter had nevergone sailing before, so you know
she's referring to a name tag,you know.
(14:19):
So it's not that this is thespirit of over 219 people people
, but also of all the veteransthat have died by suicide.
You know the the mission is tokeep their names alive, so
anytime I can insert their namesor an anecdote, I do that.
So thank you, thad, forproviding me with the platform
to do that.
Um, but yeah, you know it's uh,so so that's that.
(14:44):
That's why we went out toTacoma, washington.
We have six of those eventswhere, uh, we organize, usually
with yacht clubs, and uh, we webring veterans out, they go
sailing, we feed everyone andthen we also do regular sailing
outings.
But uh, our, those are ourevents.
There are spectacles, there areceremonies, there are speeches.
(15:07):
It's all about helping peopleconnect with other people,
keeping the memory of people whohave lost their lives alive and
things of that nature findingpeople to help.
Thad David (15:24):
It's very, very powerful.
I love it.
I mean, you're honoring thefallen men and women and I love
that you leave the one open,because that's the purpose
inside of your organization andthe purpose of what you and your
brother are doing.
It's a really, really powerful.
It's powerful to see it all.
So thank you for sharing that.
Yeah, my pleasure.
(15:48):
And are you back in Tacoma orare you not back?
Sean Duclay (15:52):
in Tacoma.
Have you done that?
You said since the pandemic youhaven't been.
No, no, but we'd like to dothat again.
Thad David (15:58):
I have quite a few friends.
I was just there for work andsome good friends of mine live
in Tacoma and I'm confident theywould love to help out.
So, on a side note, I wouldlove to get you guys linked up
and I think it would be reallycool to see it all take place.
Sean Duclay (16:14):
Yeah, yeah, that'd be great.
Thad David (16:16):
Yeah, and so you got the six events and they sound
like they're all aside fromTacoma, all over near the Long
Island area.
Hmm, yeah.
Sean Duclay (16:24):
Buffalo and Tacoma are theoma all over near the
Long Island area.
Yeah, buffalo and Tacoma arethe only two not in the Long
Island area okay and then uh andthen, because that's where I'm
from, that's where I live, andwe also have New York City right
nearby, you know.
Thad David (16:36):
So there's a lot, a lot of veterans, uh, in this
area that could benefit from ouruh organizing ah well, yeah, I
think it's fascinating, and itmakes sense that it's centrally
located to where you are,because your reach can only be
so far as you're growing, and sowhat does it look like?
The future what's your gameplan for the future of Sail
(16:58):
Ahead?
Sean Duclay (16:59):
Sure.
So, like I said, sail Ahead ismy full-time job, but that only
started last year.
So now that kind of frees me upto do to kind of expand a
little bit.
And the way that looks likemoving forward is that in 2024,
we have a we are discussing withour VA the local VA here, which
(17:22):
is the North Port VA to takeveterans sailing that are part
of their mental health andadaptive sports programs.
They have 350 veterans enrolledin those programs and the idea
is to take them sailing betweenJune and Thanksgiving twice a
(17:43):
week June and Thanksgiving twicea week.
We're offering for between likesix and 20 veterans.
We're offering them to gosailing twice a week every week
between June and Thanksgiving.
So the idea would be toreplicate that.
Wherever there's a big VA nextto water and so Buffalo is a
(18:05):
good example of the next placewe're hoping to do that perhaps
next year and then, you know,whenever.
I think the sailing world andthe veteran world too, they're
kind of small worlds, so ifpeople are a part of what we're
doing, pretty much everyonelikes what we're doing and they
(18:26):
want to take it to their home.
So a lot of different yachtclubs have asked us if we can
set up operations with them, forinstance, the Indian Harbor
Yacht Club and the San DiegoYacht Club.
So what's left is for me to goover there, connect with the
sailing community and theveterans community and then try
and create something out of itTurn veterans into sailors.
(18:49):
I don't know if you know muchabout sailing, that in the
sailing world but racing is asuper big deal.
There's a very high tech.
I mean you could also have lowtech racing, but for the most
part, I think veterans tend tolike the higher tech, high
performance, let's pushourselves, let's push the boat,
kind of mentality.
So, uh, so try and, you know,create opportunities for
(19:13):
veterans to sail.
That's that's how I view my jobcreating sailing opportunities
for veterans.
And uh, what is uh, what'sinteresting is that there are
some people you know, who know,who are going through something
difficult in life and all theyneed could be one day where
people treat them nice and takethem out on the water, which is
(19:36):
sort of unique.
Not everyone goes sailing.
I live on an island and I grewup sailing, so for me it's a
normal thing, but most people onthe island have never been
sailing.
A lot of people don't even knowhow to swim.
So sometimes, just one day ofbeing treated special, of being
reassured that there are peopleout there even if they're
strangers that care for you, isall you need to get out of a
(19:58):
funk.
Oftentimes, though, you needsomething more sustainable,
something that lasts over thewhole season, so that's where
those programs come in, wherewe're trying to get people
sailing every week or everymonth, or something like that.
Just just yeah.
Thad David (20:19):
What's the most common?
Just out of curiosity, becauseI mean 4,000 veterans is a.
That's a lot of veterans thatthat you and your brother have
gotten out on a sailboat.
What's the most common piece offeedback that you hear after
one or after several sailingtrips from veterans?
Sean Duclay (20:38):
You know, I think, uh, I think not for nothing, but
the fact that we run it as afamily, like my, my parents have
, are involved.
My two younger sisters are alsovery involved.
The fact that we run it as afamily makes it necessarily very
personal.
And, uh, a lot of the veteransthat we, that we sail with, end
(20:59):
up coming over to our house atsome point and then becoming
best friends and we have dinnerwith them all the time.
So I think, just how you know,and we, really we I mean, like I
said, now it's a job, but itused to only be for passion and
pleasure that we did this, sothat that's something you can
(21:20):
feel.
You know, it's not like aservice that we provide, because
, whatever, it's something thatwe want to do that we like doing
.
So, the the most commonfeedback is like just just the I
don't know, I don't know how tosay it and not sound corny, but
just like the love, just thelove well, you can feel I mean
it, it exudes from you justtalking about it.
Thad David (21:42):
I mean you can tell this is something that you're
doing because you love it andbecause you're passionate about
it, and so I could see that asbeing a very powerful, moving
experience.
It's really amazing, reallyfascinating, and I know you
shared the story about theVietnam veteran that went and it
was kind of a rocky, rocky trip.
(22:03):
You'll have to turn the boatback.
It was kind of a rocky, rockytrip.
Y'all had to turn the boat back.
Sean Duclay (22:11):
It seemed like that , really, that one trip just
changed everything for him.
Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, he yeah.
You know, it's reallyinteresting to see the way some
people respond to the sailing,because some people, it's almost
like it's a catalyst wherethey're going through something
difficult.
So, in this case, his name isfritz, this veteran, and fritz
was, uh, he was going through arough patch, it's fair to say,
(22:34):
and then we went sailing withhim through the course of the
entire winter, pretty much everyweekend, and uh, it's, it seems
like and he said this itempowered him to do some things
that he was wanting to do foryears, but because he was stuck
in a rut or I don't know theword for it, you know some kind
of a brain fog, he didn't do it.
(22:58):
But so, in his example, hewanted to go back to Haiti,
where he's from, and spend sometime with his family and kind of
reconnect with his roots, andthen he and then come back to
New York, which he did.
He went back to Haiti for a fewyears.
He was always sending videos ofhim partying, having fun, you
know, living life, and and soyou have responses like that.
(23:20):
You have responses, you have.
It's just really interesting.
Interesting the way peoplerespond to it.
It's it tends to be.
It's almost overwhelminglypositive, except for the very
few people who are get seasick,and that's just too bad.
There's nothing we can do aboutthat, unfortunately.
Thad David (23:35):
But what ends up happening?
Sean Duclay (23:37):
just with people that get seasick so we have uh,
we have support boats out there,ribs, uh, and if it's too bad,
uh, we will.
We'll get them from a sailboatonto a rib and bring them back
on shore and then give them aburger or something like that.
Okay.
Thad David (23:56):
That's unfortunate.
Yeah, do they.
I wonder if they have still,even in that, stepping out,
stretching outside of their, Iwould imagine, stretching
outside of their comfort zone, Iwould imagine even that was a
powerful experience for them.
Sean Duclay (24:11):
I think yeah, I've read, you know, in college I
took some psychology classesexperiences, exposure to new
experiences is really helpful toyour brain and really important
(24:31):
for you know, creating uh goodfeelings.
So, uh, so, yeah, I, I like tothink that way.
I know that for most people Ithink that's true.
You know the salty air, thebeing in nature, uh a reminder
that that you know a lot of your, a lot of problems are kind of
in your head and that we'resmaller than we think and things
matter less than we think,because when you're out there on
(24:53):
the water, it's just you, thepeople around you and the
elements, and, and that's allthat matters is, can we get to
our destination in one piece,without breaking anything,
without losing anybody?
And there's something kind ofprimal about that, there's
something a little likerecalibrating about that.
Thad David (25:16):
Yeah, what would be?
Because you said a lot ofproblems in our head.
They seem bigger but they'rereally that much smaller.
But once you get out there,everything kind of melts away
because you're so focused.
What would be an example of aproblem that?
Just out of curiosity I don'tknow if you have one off the top
of your head, but it feels likea big problem.
(25:38):
But once you get out there it'slike man, not such a big
problem.
Sean Duclay (25:42):
I, I'm not a veteran, so I'm not going to
speak for any veterans, but Ican speak for myself personally,
If I go somewhere public and Ihave social anxiety or something
like that, and then I go stepon a boat and I realize, wow,
how silly that was.
We're all just small, nobodyreally cares about the life I'm
(26:05):
living.
Uh, we're just on a rockfloating through space and blah,
blah, blah.
Yeah, you know it's, it's kindof.
It puts things in perspective,I think absolutely when it's.
Thad David (26:18):
I love the hyper-focused nature of it the
more I read about those types ofthings.
There's a really good book.
I've referenced it a few times.
It's called Stealing Fire andhe references different
activities that force your mindto be 100% present to what is
going on right now and the wayyou're describing some of these
(26:41):
sailing trips.
It seems like you have nochoice but to be hyper-focused
in, and that's what I think.
Far too often we avoid thosescenarios where we're
hyper-focused in and that's whenour mind tends to wander and it
creates a big story around.
And again, not to minimizesomebody's experience, because
it might be a big deal, but Iknow, for me, in that same light
(27:05):
, sometimes this little thingkind of feels like a much larger
thing, and a lot of times it'sbecause it had too much time to
dance around on my head, whereaswhen you get hyper-focused in,
it gives clarity and peace ofmind.
Sean Duclay (27:17):
Yeah, it's a it's.
It gives you an opportunity toprioritize everything you know,
well, I love it.
Thad David (27:25):
And there's this other, this I've been trying to
track her down because I want tointerview her and it's an
episode I'm going to record soon.
It's about the types of fun.
There's three types of fun Typeone fun.
Type two fun.
Type three fun.
Are you familiar with those?
Sean Duclay (27:40):
I've heard of one is in the moment.
Two is like after the momentpasses, right and then go ahead.
Thad David (27:49):
You explain it.
No, no, you're good and I'msure there's been several
variations of this one.
But the way that she describedit it was an old REI article
from a very, very long time agothat I happened to come across.
But basically, type one fun islike man, this is fun.
Like this, this is fun.
I'm having fun right now.
Type three fun is this is nofun.
I'm not enjoying myself.
(28:10):
I'm not going to enjoy this inthe future and it's not fun
right now.
But type two fun is very much.
It's not super enjoyable rightnow.
Like it's like man.
This is kind of sketchy, butafter the fact it's when it's
really fun that the situation'sover and you look back on it and
it's like wow, that was reallyfun and I could imagine even
(28:32):
getting scared on a sailboat.
I bet you're giving out a lot oftype 2 fun.
Sean Duclay (28:36):
Oh yeah, oh yeah, oh yeah.
Well, especially if you thinkabout the people that have never
been on a boat before andsuddenly, like, let's assume
we're in windy conditions andit's wavy, something that maybe
a lot of people don't thinkabout, who have never gone
sailing, is that we're propelledby the wind and the boat heels
(28:57):
over, but that's totally normal.
But it can be heeled over 10degrees, 20, 30 degrees, 45
degrees if you have a lot ofwind, and that's just very
unnatural for our floors to beat 45 degrees.
So for a lot of people it'sscary.
You see the railing of the boatthat gets buried under the
water as it's rushing past andall you can hear is the loud
(29:18):
wind and the waves.
In the moment, for someone new,it's either exhilarating or it's
terrifying, but but afterwardsyou survive.
And then you're like dang, Idid that, you know we did that,
and that was like wow, that wasincredible.
You don't, you don't have to bemoving that fast, uh, to get
(29:40):
that kind of rush.
And on a sailboats, you know,accepting the most high tech,
most expensive boats in theworld, they don't usually go
that fast, they don't usuallyexceed like 15 miles an hour,
let's say, or even less so, butthat doesn't matter.
What matters is that it's youand your equipment in this case
(30:02):
your boat dealing against thewind and the waves, and things
are under a lot of stress,because if you have 15 mile an
hour winds and a huge amount ofsail, then things are leaning
and craning, and it's your jobto make sure you're operating
that boat safely, that you'retaking advantage of what nature
(30:23):
is offering you, and you knowagain, if you're new to that,
what nature's offering you.
Thad David (30:28):
And, uh, you know again if you're new to that,
it's a terrifying experience,but there's there's something
cool about uh, you know aboutgoing sailing with uh veterans
and then, uh, making them scaredon your well and it's I mean,
it seems like you're combining alot of these great things that
are just we know we're good foryou know, type two, fun, great
(30:49):
for your mind, getting hyperfocused in on the moment and and
really letting all the problemsof the day.
That, uh, made me think about myson's going through.
He's in kindergarten, butthey're doing little deal, big
deal, like when to let yourselfescalate up and like processing
through and it's he's got thispicture that that he's, that he
goes back to, so anytime he'sgot something we always
(31:10):
reference.
All right, finn, is it a bigdeal or is this a little deal?
And he like sometimes he walksover to a sheet and you know
that's a little deal.
But I think, as adults, I knowfor me, for me, probably benefit
from somebody stopping me andsaying that, which I know is not
what you're doing.
But being out on a boat forcesour mind to prioritize and I
love that.
Sean Duclay (31:30):
Yeah, that just kind of happens naturally on a
boat.
I think Another really greatpart about it is that when
you're sailing, I sometimesliken it to a forced group
therapy session.
Because if I'm sailing and I'mout there with a few veterans
who may have never met eachother before, but they might
both have TBI or post-traumaticstress or depression or are
(31:56):
otherwise both sufferingadjacent things, then suddenly
no one's out there, no one'seavesdropping, no one's judging
you and you can't really bailout because you'd have to swim
back.
So not only are we physicallyworking together, because and
this is why sailing is so muchbetter than powerboating no
(32:19):
offense to any powerboaters outthere but essentially on a
powerboat you have one personwith the key, you turn the key
and from the wheel you haveeverything.
You have speed, you havemaneuvering, whereas on a
sailboat everyone has a job.
There are two sails for themost part, there's a front sail
and there's the main sail.
(32:40):
There's a jib and a main sail,and then you also have a driver.
So you need to be a team andyou need to be communicating
well and you're sort of in ittogether.
And if you can't work as a teamwell, then you're sort of
screwed because you can't makeit to your destination.
So it forces teamwork, itforces cooperation, it forces
(33:02):
camaraderie.
Work, it forces cooperation, itforces camaraderie.
And then again, if youexperience the same things in
the military as so often itseems to me that veterans have
very similar experiences thenit's kind of a good fertilized
ground for healing conversationsand things like that.
The one time I saw this in themost poignant way is we partner
(33:28):
with the Long Island MaritimeMuseum as well, and they have an
oyster boat that's over 130years old.
Congress declared it a NationalHistoric Landmark.
So I like to joke, I think it'sthe only landmark that you
could drive.
But we decided to have anall-women's veteran outing and
(33:49):
besides the crew and myself,everyone on board was a woman
and a veteran.
And within five minutes ofleaving the dock, three complete
strangers were already cryingand talking about experiences
they had with military sexualtrauma, mst and uh.
And I thought, like you know,yeah, I mean, wow, you know,
(34:10):
there's, all I have to do is getpeople on the boat and then and
then make sure it's operating.
But I don't have to do anything, I don't have to be a
psychologist, it kind of it justsort of happens, you know.
Thad David (34:22):
So yeah, that kind of leads into one question that
I was going to ask you as well,because you had referenced it to
group therapy.
And then, obviously, this is avery powerful example of the
healing that can take place andit doesn't seem like there's any
(34:44):
forced conversations.
There's no forced group talk,anything like that.
If somebody listening were tosay I want to go do this, I
would imagine that could be aholdup.
Is there a forced conversation,anything like that?
Sean Duclay (34:58):
So no, the way we started Sailhead as a family,
we're taking veterans sailingand they kind of became our
friends and it was just aregular sort of friendly thing,
and we like that spirit becauseI think it it brings out the
best in people and people arevery open that way.
Um, we haven't tried this, butI imagine that by introducing,
(35:20):
uh, for example, a psychologistalthough there are undoubtedly
benefits to that I think it willjust sort of like put people,
uh, in a defensive mode, youknow, or otherwise you know it
like we just want the space tokind of be like pure fun, you
know, and, uh, and and, as abyproduct, uh, there's some
(35:43):
catharsis going on, there's sometherapy that's going, you know,
like it's.
We try to be sneaky about it.
In other words, yeah.
Thad David (35:52):
Well, I mean it seems like the perfect recipe to
just organically let it takeplace.
You know there doesn't need tobe an added piece to it.
Yeah, an added piece to it?
Um, and I would imagine that'sprobably why people would would
sign up to go, because there isno, like you said, it would just
add a different, a differentelement to it.
(36:13):
Not that there's not a benefitto a psychologist or
psychiatrist, like that's havethose benefits as well, but just
letting it take place is uhpretty fascinating, and it's
also about our background.
Sean Duclay (36:26):
No one in my family is a mental health expert, you
know.
So we kind of it's almost likewe make do with what we have,
but it turns out that thestrategy we've employed up until
now we really like and itreally works.
So we don't, you know.
So we just want to replicate itas many times as we can.
Thad David (36:41):
I think it's.
It's an incredible thing.
I'd love to hear about it.
And another thought thatanybody that's listening that
might be thinking to themselvesyou know, I want to sign up, I
want to do this.
How much sailing knowledge doessomebody need to have in order
to be able to?
Sean Duclay (36:55):
go out and you want to be involved.
Obviously you're still welcome.
It's not.
You know, we take anyone, butwe use experienced skippers,
(37:16):
usually on their own boats.
But we also have some boats ofour own and we recently
partnered with a foundationcalled the Sterling Harbor
Foundation and they maintain, Ithink, 20 or so classic
sailboats.
Some of them are over 100 yearsold, and so if someone who
doesn't know how to sail wantsto go sailing, well, first of
(37:38):
all, I speak with you usuallyand then we have a conversation
about it, we can establish theproper expectations, what kind
of gear you need to bring, andthen, once you're there, you'll
have uh, you'll, usually I'm theone sailing with you, but
otherwise you have a veryexperienced skipper with crew.
Um, a lot of the skippers thatsail with us are also racers and
(38:00):
have done races like theBermuda race, offshore races
that last days.
Uh.
So you know we the last thingwe want to do is have a bad
experience, and part of that ismaking sure that we have
knowledgeable and like,competent people operating the
boats Right.
And then, if you want to learnhow to sail and don't know
(38:20):
anything about sailing, we alsohave had programs to get
veterans uh what's called basickeelboat certified, certified
which uh is offered by theamerican sailing association and
uh and otherwise.
Just by continuing to come withus week in, week out, you'll
learn how to sail and you knowwe're happy to teach.
And then a veteran has and canbecome crew on boats and then
(38:46):
we'll invite you to races.
Offshore races are fun.
They're not for everybody butyou know.
Thad David (38:53):
That's.
That's amazing.
And another question that Iwant to ask you too, because
it's such a just kind of yourcentral location how many
veterans of the 4 000000 arewithin your general area, and is
it common for people to fly infrom all parts?
Just knowing that you've beenaround for 10 years, I would
(39:13):
imagine your reach has beenpretty far.
Sean Duclay (39:16):
Yeah, so most, the vast majority of people who
participate in our events orprograms are local.
A lot of veterans have comefrom other states.
It's not just veterans.
We also deal a lot with thefamilies of veterans because
obviously, if an individualwithin a family is suffering or,
worse yet, passes away or dies,then the family is also
(39:41):
suffering as well.
So we extend our sailing.
Our sailing goes beyond theveteran, it includes their
family and you know, of course,like if a veteran is a father or
a mother, we don't want them tonot take their kids.
You know that's part of healingis.
You know we need your supportsystem there.
So we have in the pastfundraised and we've had
(40:04):
families, especially of ourmates, families of our mates
that we fundraise for, to comefly in from Colorado, from
Washington, idaho, louisiana,new Jersey, which is really
close, but New Jersey and a fewother states, texas and a few
others and a few others.
And the reason is, you know,especially for the families of
(40:25):
our mates, the reason why webring them is to honor their
loved one specifically, and eachof our events honors one mate
at a time and then we have theirfamily come and their family
can talk about their loved one.
You know it's a way to celebrateand remember their life, but
then it's also kind of apowerful way, a message of if
(40:50):
you're struggling, you know,here's someone telling you that
you know they had a loved onethat was also struggling and
lost the fight.
So if you're struggling now andyou don't think you're winning,
just reach out, and we're justtrying to create the most safe
possible environment that peoplefeel comfortable talking to us,
(41:10):
you know.
And then, as I said, we're notmental health care professionals
, but there are enough peoplethat are participating in our
events and that are involved inthe community that can take it
from there.
Once someone says I need help,there are people around that can
help you and so yeah, but forthe most part they're local,
(41:31):
they're tri-state area prettymuch and uh, so yeah, but for
the most part they're local, thetri-state area pretty much.
Thad David (41:35):
Well, it's.
I imagine you had it and I'djust love to know that anybody
that was listening or islistening and felt compared,
because it sounds incredible.
It sounds like something thatwould be a blast just to go out
and and experience.
So it would be.
It would be really cool to seeor hear about other people
flying out, which it sounds likethat's already happening.
Sean Duclay (41:57):
Yeah, actually there's one veteran who won't
mind that I say this because hetold me that I could.
His name is Ron.
He's a ranger, he was a ranger,he was a ranger and he
(42:20):
struggled with mental health andsuicidal thoughts resulting
from an injury, and he has TBInow.
And so his best friend is MattWilson.
And he's another ranger who didunfortunately succumb to
suicide, and he's the ranger wewere honoring in Tacoma,
washington.
So Ron has struggled withsuicidal thoughts for many, many
(42:44):
years and over time he's becomea friend of ours.
He comes to New York a lot.
Whenever we're in Washington,we would go visit him.
Now he lives in Curacao and sohe agreed to come to one of our
events a few months in advance.
It was about a month away fromthe event and I was texting him
hey, did you book your tickets?
You know you could stay at ourhouse for the weekend or however
long you want.
Blah, blah, blah.
(43:06):
And then you know, with eachpassing day he would respond
less or not respond at all, andwe started to get worried.
There's a spiral happening thatwe were aware of.
So I just activated the networkof everyone I knew who knew him
and we were just calling him,sending him love, voice memos,
(43:28):
positive, uplifting things, andI bought him a plane ticket the
morning of the event, eventhough he knew about it months
in advance.
He got on the plane, he showedup and he told me later that day
, after the event and thefestivities were done, that I
but we have saved his lifethrough, you know, rallying the
(43:51):
cavalry and uh, and reallystaying on him until he came and
uh, and the funny thing afterthat was that, um, we'd say,
okay, ron, so you know, after afew days, we're like okay, you
know, are you gonna, when areyou leaving?
And he said, well, I'llprobably like a plane tickets
(44:11):
tomorrow.
And he ended up staying for liketwo and a half weeks.
But that's totally fine, welove him and that's what we set
out to do is help people andhe's an example of someone who
really needed help and whoselife we saved.
And he won't mind me sayingthat.
He said he'd give me permissionto share that story, but you
(44:35):
know, it's kind of a.
It kind of shows you like thatthis job isn't like any other
job, you know it's.
There is no clocking out youhave.
It's a human job.
You're dealing with humanpeople and, and you know like I
would just want to help peopleis basically the idea and, uh,
(44:55):
sometimes that takes work andsometimes it's creative, um, but
you know, the point is, let'sgo sailing.
Thad David (45:02):
You know, let's go sailing, let's go sailing, let's
go sailing yeah, well, I thinkit's incredible because it's a
rare thing to find somebody thatis so committed, as you and
your family, with what they say.
This is my goal, this is whatI'm doing, and you are all in,
and it's not a nine to five likeyou said, and it's a breath of
(45:24):
fresh air to hear about, and Ijust love to hear about all the
lives you're changing and saving.
Sean Duclay (45:30):
Thank you, Matt yeah.
Thad David (45:31):
Thank you for doing what you're changing and saving.
Thank you for that.
Yeah, thank you for doing whatyou're doing.
What is the best place for ifsomebody wants to just help out?
I would imagine you takedonations.
What's the best place forsomebody to reach out, kind of
get more information and maybehelp support?
What does that look like?
Sean Duclay (45:51):
Yeah, so we are a 501c3.
So we do accept donations, andvoting isn't cheap,
unfortunately.
We offer all of our services atno cost to veterans, so if
anyone is feeling inspired bythis discourse we've been having
, they can go to saleaheadorgand they'll find a donate button
(46:14):
on our website.
There's also a fairly decentamount of information.
If you wanted to learn more, wealso have a page dedicated to
our mates, so if you want tolearn about our mates, who are
over 19 veterans who died bysuicide, and you want to read
about their bios, I would lovefor you to go to our website and
(46:37):
read about them.
If you unfortunately knowsomeone who did die of suicide
and you'd like them to behonored in that way, send an
email, info at sailaheadorg andthen we can figure something out
all right.
Thad David (46:58):
Very much appreciate it.
Thank you, sean, for foreverything that you've shared
here thus far, and if just thewebsite, is that the best place
for people to get in touch withyou to kind of check it out?
Sean Duclay (47:10):
website yeah, the website's the best.
There's okay, look at instagram, but website's definitely the
best yeah website's the best wayto go.
Thad David (47:17):
You know it's fascinating stuff.
I'm excited to dive deeper intoall of this and you've shared
several stories, but I want tojust ask you, as we start to
wrap all of this up, like whatis one more story or just one of
the things that we haven'ttalked about?
That's one of your favoritethings to share.
Sean Duclay (47:41):
Well, just that.
So my family has always beenabout hospitality and helping
people, being kind, I guess in aword.
And so when we started SailAhead, my brother and I and we
just took one veteran sailingand we realized that this thing
(48:02):
that we're privileged to takefor granted, this sport, which
is kind of not for everyonebecause of the expensive nature
of it, once we realized howhelpful it could be, we just
wanted to keep doing it.
And since then, just the mostvaluable stories I have, the
(48:24):
most enriching experiences andthe best friends I've made have
all been through this.
So you, uh, you say uh, I'minspiring, or or what you said,
and I think, no, for me it'sjust uh, I'm being pulled, you
know it's uh, it's, it's um, I'mdoing it very selfishly, no,
I'm just kidding.
But it's provided me with suchimmense value throughout all
(48:48):
these years that that you knowthere's no way I'm not going to
keep going all these years thatyou know there's no way I'm not
going to keep going.
Thad David (49:00):
I know I talked to several people doing really
great things and that always isa big talking point or a
pinnacle is what you just sharedthat you know the people that
are giving out the most to otherpeople are usually that they
get the most in return and, likeyou said, it's pulling you
towards it and it's fascinating.
Thank you so much for takingthe time to jump on to share
everything that you're doing andif I can do anything to help
out, please don't hesitate toreach out.
Sean Duclay (49:23):
Well, thank you, thad.
You're already helping byhelping us to get the word out,
by asking me questions thatbring out the best stories.
So thank you very much Iappreciate it, thank you.
Well, especially if you think about the people that
have never been on a boatbefore and suddenly like, let's
assume we're in windy conditionsand it's wavy, you don't.
Something that maybe a lot ofpeople don't think about, who
have never gone sailing, is thatwe're propelled by the wind and
the boat heals over, but that'stotally normal, but it can be
(00:22):
healed over, you know, 10degrees, 20, 30 degrees, uh, 45
degrees if you have a lot ofwind, and that's just very
unnatural for our floors to be45 degrees.
So, a lot of people.
It's scary, you know.
You see the railing of the boatthat gets buried under the
water as it's rushing past andall you can hear is the loud
wind and the waves um in the.
(00:44):
For someone new, it's eitherexhilarating or it's terrifying,
but afterwards you survive andthen you're like dang, I did
that, you know we did that, andthat was like wow, that was
incredible.
Thad David (00:59):
My name is Thad David.
I'm a former Marine recon scoutsniper with two deployments to
Iraq.
As a civilian, I've nowfacilitated hundreds of personal
and professional developmenttrainings across the country,
and it struck me recently thatthe same things that help
civilians will also helpveterans succeed in their new
roles as well.
Join me as we define civiliansuccess principles to inspire
(01:20):
veteran victories.
Welcome to another episode.
I'm here today with Sean Duclayof Sail Ahead.
How are you doing, sean?
I'm doing well.
Thank you, thad.
How are you, man?
I'm excellent.
I'm very excited.
I know somebody reached out andlinked us up together, and when
I heard about all the thingsthat you do currently and
everything you've been doing forquite some time, it's
(01:41):
fascinating to think about allthe good work you and your
brother are doing.
Sean Duclay (01:50):
So I'm excited to jump in and share it.
Well, thank you.
Yeah, I love every opportunityto talk about it, so this is
just as fun for me as it is foryou, I'm sure.
Thad David (01:54):
It's excellent and just to let everybody know right
away, on a sale ahead, you andyour brother started it.
You were 14, your brother was16.
Just for anybody that doesn'tknow anybody listening what is
Sail Ahead Sure?
Sean Duclay (02:07):
So Sail Ahead is, as you said, is, an organization
my brother and I started whenwe were 14 and 16.
And it started with a verybasic premise.
As a family we've been sailingour whole lives.
My parents even have a storywhere my brother Killian, when
he was in the cradle as baby,they put him on the high side of
the sailboat as ballast toflatten it out.
(02:29):
So we've always been on thewater and for myself and my
brother Killian it was alwaystherapeutic.
My brother would say he wouldalways forget about the math
test he just flunked when wewere out on the water.
So when we were 14 and 16, onemorning getting ready to go to
school, we heard on our localnews channel that at least that
(02:52):
the VA had produced a study thatwas saying at least 22 veterans
die by suicide every day, whichwe know is actually really an
underrepresentation of thereality that there's over 70,000
veterans in our county ofSuffolk County and many, many,
many homeless veterans in NewYork City, which is in our
backyard, etc.
(03:12):
So we were shocked by this.
We were disturbed by this, sowe decided to take it into our
own hands and we invited aVietnam veteran sailing with us
At the time we were sailing inthe winter out of Oyster Bay on
dinghies and not a recipe forsuccess, if you take an older
(03:33):
gentleman, a veteran, sailing inthe winter on a dinghy.
So he actually asked us to cutthe sail short, which we did,
but nevertheless, when we gotback to the beach he gave us
both a hug.
He started crying, so westarted crying and he told us
that in the 20 years that he wasgoing to therapy for his PTSD,
that was the best therapy heever had.
So we sort of you know we setout to do good.
(03:54):
We just didn't realize how muchof an impact we could have had.
And the second we realized, youknow, the potential that
sailing had on helping people.
There was no decision to bemade.
We just started devising planshow to maximize our impact, how
(04:16):
to connect the sailing worldwith the veteran world.
And it's been 10 years now.
Sail Ahead is my full-time joband we've taken over 4,000
veterans sailing.
Thad David (04:28):
Over how many veterans sailing 4,000.
4,000.
That's an impressive,impressive number, especially
for taking it on at such a youngage.
I think about what I was doingat the age of 14, and it was
definitely not something asimpactful as this, so it's
really fascinating to hear about.
Sean Duclay (04:47):
I think we definitely benefited from being
young in some ways, because thecommunity, you know, they saw
what we were trying to do.
They saw that we had someunique ideas and so they really
were very, very helpful.
You know, a bunch of differentsectors of our community were
very much behind us and theywanted to see us succeed.
So there was some advantage tobeing young.
(05:09):
A story I like to tell is oneof the ways we try to diversify
to take veterans sailing asopposed to just taking them on
our boat.
On our boats is we approach ayacht club, the Centerport Yacht
Club.
On our boats is we approach theyacht club, the Centerport
Yacht Club, which is the yachtclub that this year will be the
(05:29):
eighth year that we partner withthem for a big event, and the
biggest event we've had withthem featured 54 sailboats and
two helicopters.
And it all started because oneday kind of knocked on their
door and the pitch was this hey,can we use your facilities,
(05:50):
your sailors and their boats andtake a bunch of veterans
sailing?
And oh, yeah, can you pay foreverything and maybe we can get
some burgers too?
So they said yes, and you knowit's shocking but it's a
testament to.
Uh, I think a lot of peoplereally just want to do good.
They just don't know exactlyhow you know.
So you make it easy for them onhow they can help and they'll
(06:13):
be eager to jump on thatopportunity.
So, uh, so this has become atradition and the centerport
yacht club wants to do thisevery year for as long as they
exist.
So it's been immenselysuccessful.
We know, with just that eventwe organize six every year, but
with just that event we've savedsome lives.
So you know, it's a greatfeeling.
(06:34):
Everyone has a sense of beingon the same team, of working
towards something bigger, and sothat's what I mean Like the
community really supported us.
We don't really see it as us byourselves doing all this.
We've had just last year we had, like, I think, 80 boat owners
that volunteered throughout theyear.
So you know, it's a wholecommunity that's really behind
(06:57):
us.
Thad David (06:58):
That's fascinating and I really appreciate your
comment that I think might bejust a little bit opposite of
what some other people would say, but you said a lot of people
really just want to help.
They have good in their heartand they just don't know where
to help and you're justproviding that opportunity for
it and what a beautiful way oflooking at life and that's
(07:21):
fascinating.
So you're now going to do that.
One specific one.
You said every year it takesplace every year.
Sean Duclay (07:26):
Yeah, this year 2024, will be the eighth year we
do it with the Center for YachtClub.
Okay, and we do it every yearand so, beyond just having one
event with the Center for YachtClub, it's the biggest event
Sail Ahead does every year.
A lot of the skippers go on totake veterans sailing during
weekly races or just privatelyon their boats on weekends, and
(07:48):
so we view our role in someregard as being kind of some
sort of a broker where weconnect veterans with skippers
and sailors and we try to matchby personality and age and
things like that, so that theycan get along and hopefully they
do, and then the relationshipyou know lives on without us
(08:11):
having to be involved.
Thad David (08:13):
Wow.
So y'all are, I mean, on top ofhosting these events.
Your end goal is to help getveterans paired up, matched up
with other people that they cango sailing with long term and
hopefully have that I mean, itsounds like in some cases could
be a lifelong friendship thatthey're creating yeah, yeah, I
mean, we have that.
Sean Duclay (08:31):
We have some some incredible stories of, uh, of
there's, there's, uh one skipperwho is also a vietnam veteran.
Uh, he's a double purple heartrecipient and he told us that
the way he characterized hisexperience in Vietnam is I think
he spent 280-some days playinghide-and-seek and twice he was
(08:52):
found.
But he's someone who neverreally talked about his
experience and like never, notto his family, not to us, even
though we've known him for years, and like never not to his
family, not to us, even thoughwe've known him for years.
And then one day, one of theseevents at the Center for Yacht
Club, we had on his boat a youngMarine Corps captain who was in
(09:13):
Afghanistan and Iraq, and thatwas the very first time where
the Vietnam veteran opened upabout his experience was on that
boat that day, and it wasbecause he thought that by
sharing his experience he wouldhelp the younger generation,
which he did, and they were ableto connect over some shared
(09:33):
adversity.
And you know, like, basically,that has nothing really to do
with me, except that we createdthe conditions that that could
take place, but it's magical,you know, that's really really
cool, something we're reallyhappy about and proud of, you
know.
Thad David (09:49):
You should be very proud of it and I love you're
leading the way with humility.
You know you're really I meanyou're brokering all of it and
you're giving out all thecredits to everybody else and
it's really a magical thing.
It's wonderful.
It's a breath of fresh air tobe able to speak with you about
it.
I love that and you mentionedearlier.
Thank you for sharing any otherstories like that.
(10:11):
Share along the way, because Ilove to hear about that stuff.
Did you mention and I want tomake sure I heard it right that
you do that was one of sixevents that y'all do every year.
Sean Duclay (10:20):
Yes.
So what are the other eventsthat you do.
So we partner with a bunch ofyacht clubs around Long Island.
So, to name a few, there's theSeacliff Yacht Club, the
Centerport Yacht Club, theSagamore Yacht Club, babylon
Yacht Club.
We also have an event inBuffalo Harbor and also,
(10:42):
pre-pandemic, we had since 2017until the pandemic, we had
events every year in Tacoma,washington, for the Ranger
Battalion over there.
Okay, and the reason being isbecause one of our missions at
Sailorhead is to honor andremember our mates, and I'll
show you our mates.
These are our mates.
(11:03):
They're the name tag Over 219veterans who've died by suicide.
So if we go back to the originof Sail Ahead, the statistic of
22 a day 219 is one short of 220.
So these are the self-inflictedcasualties in the United States
(11:25):
every 10 days, and we carry ourmates with us wherever we go,
for a number of reasons.
One is kind of the shock factorFor people who don't have any
concept of what's going on inthe military community.
This is the same 22 a day.
People might associate it witha push-up challenge or something
(11:47):
like that, but these are realhuman lives represented by name
tags.
Behind every one of theseveterans there's a family that's
suffered.
So one of our mates his name isRyan James Day.
He's a US Army Ranger.
He was 21 when he took his lifeand he was stationed in
Washington, in Tacoma.
(12:08):
So our event there was in honorof him and another Ranger, matt
Wilson, who also took his life,and the whole point is bring
the Ranger community togetherfor a day of fun.
We don't want to make anyonetoo sad by talking about these
realities, but they are.
It is a reality, so we have totalk about it.
(12:29):
But we also make the day aboutfun and healing and connectivity
.
Thad David (12:35):
So that's what, excuse me, no, you're good.
I mean just for anybody that,if you're listening to this only
and you weren't able to see itSean actually held up you said
210 name tags.
I mean it's 219.
It's a.
I mean it really hits you whenyou see that.
I mean you.
(12:58):
I know that was the point of itwhen you say 22 a day, but when
you actually hold that up andyou see all those name tags that
it's that's very powerful.
Sean Duclay (13:10):
Those name tags, that it's that's very powerful.
Yeah and uh.
And so we started with 219 nametags and the one that's missing
, you know, uh, 22 a day times10 days is 220.
The one that's missingrepresents the life that we try
to save.
Um, last, uh, through our work,we've met many more veterans
who have friends who have diedby suicide, so we now have more
than 219, but that's the numberwe started with and uh, and the
(13:33):
incredible the thing is that, uh, you know it's a symbol, but
it's also real.
These are real human lives thatI'm holding in my hands right
now through these name tags, andthe reason I say that is
because we went sailing withthem years ago, when we first
had them duplicated, and so Itook a selfie of a name tag that
(13:58):
says shampoo and that's a womanwho.
She took her life at a veryyoung age, and I took a selfie
with her and I sent it to hermom and her mom said oh, wow,
you know my daughter had nevergone sailing before, so you know
she's referring to a name tag,you know.
(14:19):
So it's not that this is thespirit of over 219 people people
, but also of all the veteransthat have died by suicide.
You know the the mission is tokeep their names alive, so
anytime I can insert their namesor an anecdote, I do that.
So thank you, thad, forproviding me with the platform
to do that.
Um, but yeah, you know it's uh,so so that's that.
(14:44):
That's why we went out toTacoma, washington.
We have six of those eventswhere, uh, we organize, usually
with yacht clubs, and uh, we webring veterans out, they go
sailing, we feed everyone andthen we also do regular sailing
outings.
But uh, our, those are ourevents.
There are spectacles, there areceremonies, there are speeches.
(15:07):
It's all about helping peopleconnect with other people,
keeping the memory of people whohave lost their lives alive and
things of that nature findingpeople to help.
Thad David (15:24):
It's very, very powerful.
I love it.
I mean, you're honoring thefallen men and women and I love
that you leave the one open,because that's the purpose
inside of your organization andthe purpose of what you and your
brother are doing.
It's a really, really powerful.
It's powerful to see it all.
So thank you for sharing that.
Yeah, my pleasure.
(15:48):
And are you back in Tacoma orare you not back?
Sean Duclay (15:52):
in Tacoma.
Have you done that?
You said since the pandemic youhaven't been.
No, no, but we'd like to dothat again.
Thad David (15:58):
I have quite a few friends.
I was just there for work andsome good friends of mine live
in Tacoma and I'm confident theywould love to help out.
So, on a side note, I wouldlove to get you guys linked up
and I think it would be reallycool to see it all take place.
Sean Duclay (16:14):
Yeah, yeah, that'd be great.
Thad David (16:16):
Yeah, and so you got the six events and they sound
like they're all aside fromTacoma, all over near the Long
Island area.
Hmm, yeah.
Sean Duclay (16:24):
Buffalo and Tacoma are theoma all over near the
Long Island area.
Yeah, buffalo and Tacoma arethe only two not in the Long
Island area okay and then uh andthen, because that's where I'm
from, that's where I live, andwe also have New York City right
nearby, you know.
Thad David (16:36):
So there's a lot, a lot of veterans, uh, in this
area that could benefit from ouruh organizing ah well, yeah, I
think it's fascinating, and itmakes sense that it's centrally
located to where you are,because your reach can only be
so far as you're growing, and sowhat does it look like?
The future what's your gameplan for the future of Sail
(16:58):
Ahead?
Sean Duclay (16:59):
Sure.
So, like I said, sail Ahead ismy full-time job, but that only
started last year.
So now that kind of frees me upto do to kind of expand a
little bit.
And the way that looks likemoving forward is that in 2024,
we have a we are discussing withour VA the local VA here, which
(17:22):
is the North Port VA to takeveterans sailing that are part
of their mental health andadaptive sports programs.
They have 350 veterans enrolledin those programs and the idea
is to take them sailing betweenJune and Thanksgiving twice a
(17:43):
week June and Thanksgiving twicea week.
We're offering for between likesix and 20 veterans.
We're offering them to gosailing twice a week every week
between June and Thanksgiving.
So the idea would be toreplicate that.
Wherever there's a big VA nextto water and so Buffalo is a
(18:05):
good example of the next placewe're hoping to do that perhaps
next year and then, you know,whenever.
I think the sailing world andthe veteran world too, they're
kind of small worlds, so ifpeople are a part of what we're
doing, pretty much everyonelikes what we're doing and they
(18:26):
want to take it to their home.
So a lot of different yachtclubs have asked us if we can
set up operations with them, forinstance, the Indian Harbor
Yacht Club and the San DiegoYacht Club.
So what's left is for me to goover there, connect with the
sailing community and theveterans community and then try
and create something out of itTurn veterans into sailors.
(18:49):
I don't know if you know muchabout sailing, that in the
sailing world but racing is asuper big deal.
There's a very high tech.
I mean you could also have lowtech racing, but for the most
part, I think veterans tend tolike the higher tech, high
performance, let's pushourselves, let's push the boat,
kind of mentality.
So, uh, so try and, you know,create opportunities for
(19:13):
veterans to sail.
That's that's how I view my jobcreating sailing opportunities
for veterans.
And uh, what is uh, what'sinteresting is that there are
some people you know, who know,who are going through something
difficult in life and all theyneed could be one day where
people treat them nice and takethem out on the water, which is
(19:36):
sort of unique.
Not everyone goes sailing.
I live on an island and I grewup sailing, so for me it's a
normal thing, but most people onthe island have never been
sailing.
A lot of people don't even knowhow to swim.
So sometimes, just one day ofbeing treated special, of being
reassured that there are peopleout there even if they're
strangers that care for you, isall you need to get out of a
(19:58):
funk.
Oftentimes, though, you needsomething more sustainable,
something that lasts over thewhole season, so that's where
those programs come in, wherewe're trying to get people
sailing every week or everymonth, or something like that.
Just just yeah.
Thad David (20:19):
What's the most common?
Just out of curiosity, becauseI mean 4,000 veterans is a.
That's a lot of veterans thatthat you and your brother have
gotten out on a sailboat.
What's the most common piece offeedback that you hear after
one or after several sailingtrips from veterans?
Sean Duclay (20:38):
You know, I think, uh, I think not for nothing, but
the fact that we run it as afamily, like my, my parents have
, are involved.
My two younger sisters are alsovery involved.
The fact that we run it as afamily makes it necessarily very
personal.
And, uh, a lot of the veteransthat we, that we sail with, end
(20:59):
up coming over to our house atsome point and then becoming
best friends and we have dinnerwith them all the time.
So I think, just how you know,and we, really we I mean, like I
said, now it's a job, but itused to only be for passion and
pleasure that we did this, sothat that's something you can
(21:20):
feel.
You know, it's not like aservice that we provide, because
, whatever, it's something thatwe want to do that we like doing
.
So, the the most commonfeedback is like just just the I
don't know, I don't know how tosay it and not sound corny, but
just like the love, just thelove well, you can feel I mean
it, it exudes from you justtalking about it.
Thad David (21:42):
I mean you can tell this is something that you're
doing because you love it andbecause you're passionate about
it, and so I could see that asbeing a very powerful, moving
experience.
It's really amazing, reallyfascinating, and I know you
shared the story about theVietnam veteran that went and it
was kind of a rocky, rocky trip.
(22:03):
You'll have to turn the boatback.
It was kind of a rocky, rockytrip.
Y'all had to turn the boat back.
Sean Duclay (22:11):
It seemed like that , really, that one trip just
changed everything for him.
Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, he yeah.
You know, it's reallyinteresting to see the way some
people respond to the sailing,because some people, it's almost
like it's a catalyst wherethey're going through something
difficult.
So, in this case, his name isfritz, this veteran, and fritz
was, uh, he was going through arough patch, it's fair to say,
(22:34):
and then we went sailing withhim through the course of the
entire winter, pretty much everyweekend, and uh, it's, it seems
like and he said this itempowered him to do some things
that he was wanting to do foryears, but because he was stuck
in a rut or I don't know theword for it, you know some kind
of a brain fog, he didn't do it.
(22:58):
But so, in his example, hewanted to go back to Haiti,
where he's from, and spend sometime with his family and kind of
reconnect with his roots, andthen he and then come back to
New York, which he did.
He went back to Haiti for a fewyears.
He was always sending videos ofhim partying, having fun, you
know, living life, and and soyou have responses like that.
(23:20):
You have responses, you have.
It's just really interesting.
Interesting the way peoplerespond to it.
It's it tends to be.
It's almost overwhelminglypositive, except for the very
few people who are get seasick,and that's just too bad.
There's nothing we can do aboutthat, unfortunately.
Thad David (23:35):
But what ends up happening?
Sean Duclay (23:37):
just with people that get seasick so we have uh,
we have support boats out there,ribs, uh, and if it's too bad,
uh, we will.
We'll get them from a sailboatonto a rib and bring them back
on shore and then give them aburger or something like that.
Okay.
Thad David (23:56):
That's unfortunate.
Yeah, do they.
I wonder if they have still,even in that, stepping out,
stretching outside of their, Iwould imagine, stretching
outside of their comfort zone, Iwould imagine even that was a
powerful experience for them.
Sean Duclay (24:11):
I think yeah, I've read, you know, in college I
took some psychology classesexperiences, exposure to new
experiences is really helpful toyour brain and really important
(24:31):
for you know, creating uh goodfeelings.
So, uh, so, yeah, I, I like tothink that way.
I know that for most people Ithink that's true.
You know the salty air, thebeing in nature, uh a reminder
that that you know a lot of your, a lot of problems are kind of
in your head and that we'resmaller than we think and things
matter less than we think,because when you're out there on
(24:53):
the water, it's just you, thepeople around you and the
elements, and, and that's allthat matters is, can we get to
our destination in one piece,without breaking anything,
without losing anybody?
And there's something kind ofprimal about that, there's
something a little likerecalibrating about that.
Thad David (25:16):
Yeah, what would be?
Because you said a lot ofproblems in our head.
They seem bigger but they'rereally that much smaller.
But once you get out there,everything kind of melts away
because you're so focused.
What would be an example of aproblem that?
Just out of curiosity I don'tknow if you have one off the top
of your head, but it feels likea big problem.
(25:38):
But once you get out there it'slike man, not such a big
problem.
Sean Duclay (25:42):
I, I'm not a veteran, so I'm not going to
speak for any veterans, but Ican speak for myself personally,
If I go somewhere public and Ihave social anxiety or something
like that, and then I go stepon a boat and I realize, wow,
how silly that was.
We're all just small, nobodyreally cares about the life I'm
(26:05):
living.
Uh, we're just on a rockfloating through space and blah,
blah, blah.
Yeah, you know it's, it's kindof.
It puts things in perspective,I think absolutely when it's.
Thad David (26:18):
I love the hyper-focused nature of it the
more I read about those types ofthings.
There's a really good book.
I've referenced it a few times.
It's called Stealing Fire andhe references different
activities that force your mindto be 100% present to what is
going on right now and the wayyou're describing some of these
(26:41):
sailing trips.
It seems like you have nochoice but to be hyper-focused
in, and that's what I think.
Far too often we avoid thosescenarios where we're
hyper-focused in and that's whenour mind tends to wander and it
creates a big story around.
And again, not to minimizesomebody's experience, because
it might be a big deal, but Iknow, for me, in that same light
(27:05):
, sometimes this little thingkind of feels like a much larger
thing, and a lot of times it'sbecause it had too much time to
dance around on my head, whereaswhen you get hyper-focused in,
it gives clarity and peace ofmind.
Sean Duclay (27:17):
Yeah, it's a it's.
It gives you an opportunity toprioritize everything you know,
well, I love it.
Thad David (27:25):
And there's this other, this I've been trying to
track her down because I want tointerview her and it's an
episode I'm going to record soon.
It's about the types of fun.
There's three types of fun Typeone fun.
Type two fun.
Type three fun.
Are you familiar with those?
Sean Duclay (27:40):
I've heard of one is in the moment.
Two is like after the momentpasses, right and then go ahead.
Thad David (27:49):
You explain it.
No, no, you're good and I'msure there's been several
variations of this one.
But the way that she describedit it was an old REI article
from a very, very long time agothat I happened to come across.
But basically, type one fun islike man, this is fun.
Like this, this is fun.
I'm having fun right now.
Type three fun is this is nofun.
I'm not enjoying myself.
(28:10):
I'm not going to enjoy this inthe future and it's not fun
right now.
But type two fun is very much.
It's not super enjoyable rightnow.
Like it's like man.
This is kind of sketchy, butafter the fact it's when it's
really fun that the situation'sover and you look back on it and
it's like wow, that was reallyfun and I could imagine even
(28:32):
getting scared on a sailboat.
I bet you're giving out a lot oftype 2 fun.
Sean Duclay (28:36):
Oh yeah, oh yeah, oh yeah.
Well, especially if you thinkabout the people that have never
been on a boat before andsuddenly, like, let's assume
we're in windy conditions andit's wavy, something that maybe
a lot of people don't thinkabout, who have never gone
sailing, is that we're propelledby the wind and the boat heels
(28:57):
over, but that's totally normal.
But it can be heeled over 10degrees, 20, 30 degrees, 45
degrees if you have a lot ofwind, and that's just very
unnatural for our floors to beat 45 degrees.
So for a lot of people it'sscary.
You see the railing of the boatthat gets buried under the
water as it's rushing past andall you can hear is the loud
(29:18):
wind and the waves.
In the moment, for someone new,it's either exhilarating or it's
terrifying, but but afterwardsyou survive.
And then you're like dang, Idid that, you know we did that,
and that was like wow, that wasincredible.
You don't, you don't have to bemoving that fast, uh, to get
(29:40):
that kind of rush.
And on a sailboats, you know,accepting the most high tech,
most expensive boats in theworld, they don't usually go
that fast, they don't usuallyexceed like 15 miles an hour,
let's say, or even less so, butthat doesn't matter.
What matters is that it's youand your equipment in this case
(30:02):
your boat dealing against thewind and the waves, and things
are under a lot of stress,because if you have 15 mile an
hour winds and a huge amount ofsail, then things are leaning
and craning, and it's your jobto make sure you're operating
that boat safely, that you'retaking advantage of what nature
(30:23):
is offering you, and you knowagain, if you're new to that,
what nature's offering you.
Thad David (30:28):
And, uh, you know again if you're new to that,
it's a terrifying experience,but there's there's something
cool about uh, you know aboutgoing sailing with uh veterans
and then, uh, making them scaredon your well and it's I mean,
it seems like you're combining alot of these great things that
are just we know we're good foryou know, type two, fun, great
(30:49):
for your mind, getting hyperfocused in on the moment and and
really letting all the problemsof the day.
That, uh, made me think about myson's going through.
He's in kindergarten, butthey're doing little deal, big
deal, like when to let yourselfescalate up and like processing
through and it's he's got thispicture that that he's, that he
goes back to, so anytime he'sgot something we always
(31:10):
reference.
All right, finn, is it a bigdeal or is this a little deal?
And he like sometimes he walksover to a sheet and you know
that's a little deal.
But I think, as adults, I knowfor me, for me, probably benefit
from somebody stopping me andsaying that, which I know is not
what you're doing.
But being out on a boat forcesour mind to prioritize and I
love that.
Sean Duclay (31:30):
Yeah, that just kind of happens naturally on a
boat.
I think Another really greatpart about it is that when
you're sailing, I sometimesliken it to a forced group
therapy session.
Because if I'm sailing and I'mout there with a few veterans
who may have never met eachother before, but they might
both have TBI or post-traumaticstress or depression or are
(31:56):
otherwise both sufferingadjacent things, then suddenly
no one's out there, no one'seavesdropping, no one's judging
you and you can't really bailout because you'd have to swim
back.
So not only are we physicallyworking together, because and
this is why sailing is so muchbetter than powerboating no
(32:19):
offense to any powerboaters outthere but essentially on a
powerboat you have one personwith the key, you turn the key
and from the wheel you haveeverything.
You have speed, you havemaneuvering, whereas on a
sailboat everyone has a job.
There are two sails for themost part, there's a front sail
and there's the main sail.
(32:40):
There's a jib and a main sail,and then you also have a driver.
So you need to be a team andyou need to be communicating
well and you're sort of in ittogether.
And if you can't work as a teamwell, then you're sort of
screwed because you can't makeit to your destination.
So it forces teamwork, itforces cooperation, it forces
(33:02):
camaraderie.
Work, it forces cooperation, itforces camaraderie.
And then again, if youexperience the same things in
the military as so often itseems to me that veterans have
very similar experiences thenit's kind of a good fertilized
ground for healing conversationsand things like that.
The one time I saw this in themost poignant way is we partner
(33:28):
with the Long Island MaritimeMuseum as well, and they have an
oyster boat that's over 130years old.
Congress declared it a NationalHistoric Landmark.
So I like to joke, I think it'sthe only landmark that you
could drive.
But we decided to have anall-women's veteran outing and
(33:49):
besides the crew and myself,everyone on board was a woman
and a veteran.
And within five minutes ofleaving the dock, three complete
strangers were already cryingand talking about experiences
they had with military sexualtrauma, mst and uh.
And I thought, like you know,yeah, I mean, wow, you know,
(34:10):
there's, all I have to do is getpeople on the boat and then and
then make sure it's operating.
But I don't have to do anything, I don't have to be a
psychologist, it kind of it justsort of happens, you know.
Thad David (34:22):
So yeah, that kind of leads into one question that
I was going to ask you as well,because you had referenced it to
group therapy.
And then, obviously, this is avery powerful example of the
healing that can take place andit doesn't seem like there's any
(34:44):
forced conversations.
There's no forced group talk,anything like that.
If somebody listening were tosay I want to go do this, I
would imagine that could be aholdup.
Is there a forced conversation,anything like that?
Sean Duclay (34:58):
So no, the way we started Sailhead as a family,
we're taking veterans sailingand they kind of became our
friends and it was just aregular sort of friendly thing,
and we like that spirit becauseI think it it brings out the
best in people and people arevery open that way.
Um, we haven't tried this, butI imagine that by introducing,
(35:20):
uh, for example, a psychologistalthough there are undoubtedly
benefits to that I think it willjust sort of like put people,
uh, in a defensive mode, youknow, or otherwise you know it
like we just want the space tokind of be like pure fun, you
know, and, uh, and and, as abyproduct, uh, there's some
(35:43):
catharsis going on, there's sometherapy that's going, you know,
like it's.
We try to be sneaky about it.
In other words, yeah.
Thad David (35:52):
Well, I mean it seems like the perfect recipe to
just organically let it takeplace.
You know there doesn't need tobe an added piece to it.
Yeah, an added piece to it?
Um, and I would imagine that'sprobably why people would would
sign up to go, because there isno, like you said, it would just
add a different, a differentelement to it.
(36:13):
Not that there's not a benefitto a psychologist or
psychiatrist, like that's havethose benefits as well, but just
letting it take place is uhpretty fascinating, and it's
also about our background.
Sean Duclay (36:26):
No one in my family is a mental health expert, you
know.
So we kind of it's almost likewe make do with what we have,
but it turns out that thestrategy we've employed up until
now we really like and itreally works.
So we don't, you know.
So we just want to replicate itas many times as we can.
Thad David (36:41):
I think it's.
It's an incredible thing.
I'd love to hear about it.
And another thought thatanybody that's listening that
might be thinking to themselvesyou know, I want to sign up, I
want to do this.
How much sailing knowledge doessomebody need to have in order
to be able to?
Sean Duclay (36:55):
go out and you want to be involved.
Obviously you're still welcome.
It's not.
You know, we take anyone, butwe use experienced skippers,
(37:16):
usually on their own boats.
But we also have some boats ofour own and we recently
partnered with a foundationcalled the Sterling Harbor
Foundation and they maintain, Ithink, 20 or so classic
sailboats.
Some of them are over 100 yearsold, and so if someone who
doesn't know how to sail wantsto go sailing, well, first of
(37:38):
all, I speak with you usuallyand then we have a conversation
about it, we can establish theproper expectations, what kind
of gear you need to bring, andthen, once you're there, you'll
have uh, you'll, usually I'm theone sailing with you, but
otherwise you have a veryexperienced skipper with crew.
Um, a lot of the skippers thatsail with us are also racers and
(38:00):
have done races like theBermuda race, offshore races
that last days.
Uh.
So you know we the last thingwe want to do is have a bad
experience, and part of that ismaking sure that we have
knowledgeable and like,competent people operating the
boats Right.
And then, if you want to learnhow to sail and don't know
(38:20):
anything about sailing, we alsohave had programs to get
veterans uh what's called basickeelboat certified, certified
which uh is offered by theamerican sailing association and
uh and otherwise.
Just by continuing to come withus week in, week out, you'll
learn how to sail and you knowwe're happy to teach.
And then a veteran has and canbecome crew on boats and then
(38:46):
we'll invite you to races.
Offshore races are fun.
They're not for everybody butyou know.
Thad David (38:53):
That's.
That's amazing.
And another question that Iwant to ask you too, because
it's such a just kind of yourcentral location how many
veterans of the 4 000000 arewithin your general area, and is
it common for people to fly infrom all parts?
Just knowing that you've beenaround for 10 years, I would
(39:13):
imagine your reach has beenpretty far.
Sean Duclay (39:16):
Yeah, so most, the vast majority of people who
participate in our events orprograms are local.
A lot of veterans have comefrom other states.
It's not just veterans.
We also deal a lot with thefamilies of veterans because
obviously, if an individualwithin a family is suffering or,
worse yet, passes away or dies,then the family is also
(39:41):
suffering as well.
So we extend our sailing.
Our sailing goes beyond theveteran, it includes their
family and you know, of course,like if a veteran is a father or
a mother, we don't want them tonot take their kids.
You know that's part of healingis.
You know we need your supportsystem there.
So we have in the pastfundraised and we've had
(40:04):
families, especially of ourmates, families of our mates
that we fundraise for, to comefly in from Colorado, from
Washington, idaho, louisiana,new Jersey, which is really
close, but New Jersey and a fewother states, texas and a few
others and a few others.
And the reason is, you know,especially for the families of
(40:25):
our mates, the reason why webring them is to honor their
loved one specifically, and eachof our events honors one mate
at a time and then we have theirfamily come and their family
can talk about their loved one.
You know it's a way to celebrateand remember their life, but
then it's also kind of apowerful way, a message of if
(40:50):
you're struggling, you know,here's someone telling you that
you know they had a loved onethat was also struggling and
lost the fight.
So if you're struggling now andyou don't think you're winning,
just reach out, and we're justtrying to create the most safe
possible environment that peoplefeel comfortable talking to us,
(41:10):
you know.
And then, as I said, we're notmental health care professionals
, but there are enough peoplethat are participating in our
events and that are involved inthe community that can take it
from there.
Once someone says I need help,there are people around that can
help you and so yeah, but forthe most part they're local,
(41:31):
they're tri-state area prettymuch and uh, so yeah, but for
the most part they're local, thetri-state area pretty much.
Thad David (41:35):
Well, it's.
I imagine you had it and I'djust love to know that anybody
that was listening or islistening and felt compared,
because it sounds incredible.
It sounds like something thatwould be a blast just to go out
and and experience.
So it would be.
It would be really cool to seeor hear about other people
flying out, which it sounds likethat's already happening.
Sean Duclay (41:57):
Yeah, actually there's one veteran who won't
mind that I say this because hetold me that I could.
His name is Ron.
He's a ranger, he was a ranger,he was a ranger and he
(42:20):
struggled with mental health andsuicidal thoughts resulting
from an injury, and he has TBInow.
And so his best friend is MattWilson.
And he's another ranger who didunfortunately succumb to
suicide, and he's the ranger wewere honoring in Tacoma,
washington.
So Ron has struggled withsuicidal thoughts for many, many
(42:44):
years and over time he's becomea friend of ours.
He comes to New York a lot.
Whenever we're in Washington,we would go visit him.
Now he lives in Curacao and sohe agreed to come to one of our
events a few months in advance.
It was about a month away fromthe event and I was texting him
hey, did you book your tickets?
You know you could stay at ourhouse for the weekend or however
long you want.
Blah, blah, blah.
(43:06):
And then you know, with eachpassing day he would respond
less or not respond at all, andwe started to get worried.
There's a spiral happening thatwe were aware of.
So I just activated the networkof everyone I knew who knew him
and we were just calling him,sending him love, voice memos,
(43:28):
positive, uplifting things, andI bought him a plane ticket the
morning of the event, eventhough he knew about it months
in advance.
He got on the plane, he showedup and he told me later that day
, after the event and thefestivities were done, that I
but we have saved his lifethrough, you know, rallying the
(43:51):
cavalry and uh, and reallystaying on him until he came and
uh, and the funny thing afterthat was that, um, we'd say,
okay, ron, so you know, after afew days, we're like okay, you
know, are you gonna, when areyou leaving?
And he said, well, I'llprobably like a plane tickets
(44:11):
tomorrow.
And he ended up staying for liketwo and a half weeks.
But that's totally fine, welove him and that's what we set
out to do is help people andhe's an example of someone who
really needed help and whoselife we saved.
And he won't mind me sayingthat.
He said he'd give me permissionto share that story, but you
(44:35):
know, it's kind of a.
It kind of shows you like thatthis job isn't like any other
job, you know it's.
There is no clocking out youhave.
It's a human job.
You're dealing with humanpeople and, and you know like I
would just want to help peopleis basically the idea and, uh,
(44:55):
sometimes that takes work andsometimes it's creative, um, but
you know, the point is, let'sgo sailing.
Thad David (45:02):
You know, let's go sailing, let's go sailing, let's
go sailing yeah, well, I thinkit's incredible because it's a
rare thing to find somebody thatis so committed, as you and
your family, with what they say.
This is my goal, this is whatI'm doing, and you are all in,
and it's not a nine to five likeyou said, and it's a breath of
(45:24):
fresh air to hear about, and Ijust love to hear about all the
lives you're changing and saving.
Sean Duclay (45:30):
Thank you, Matt yeah.
Thad David (45:31):
Thank you for doing what you're changing and saving.
Thank you for that.
Yeah, thank you for doing whatyou're doing.
What is the best place for ifsomebody wants to just help out?
I would imagine you takedonations.
What's the best place forsomebody to reach out, kind of
get more information and maybehelp support?
What does that look like?
Sean Duclay (45:51):
Yeah, so we are a 501c3.
So we do accept donations, andvoting isn't cheap,
unfortunately.
We offer all of our services atno cost to veterans, so if
anyone is feeling inspired bythis discourse we've been having
, they can go to saleaheadorgand they'll find a donate button
(46:14):
on our website.
There's also a fairly decentamount of information.
If you wanted to learn more, wealso have a page dedicated to
our mates, so if you want tolearn about our mates, who are
over 19 veterans who died bysuicide, and you want to read
about their bios, I would lovefor you to go to our website and
(46:37):
read about them.
If you unfortunately knowsomeone who did die of suicide
and you'd like them to behonored in that way, send an
email, info at sailaheadorg andthen we can figure something out
all right.
Thad David (46:58):
Very much appreciate it.
Thank you, sean, for foreverything that you've shared
here thus far, and if just thewebsite, is that the best place
for people to get in touch withyou to kind of check it out?
Sean Duclay (47:10):
website yeah, the website's the best.
There's okay, look at instagram, but website's definitely the
best yeah website's the best wayto go.
Thad David (47:17):
You know it's fascinating stuff.
I'm excited to dive deeper intoall of this and you've shared
several stories, but I want tojust ask you, as we start to
wrap all of this up, like whatis one more story or just one of
the things that we haven'ttalked about?
That's one of your favoritethings to share.
Sean Duclay (47:41):
Well, just that.
So my family has always beenabout hospitality and helping
people, being kind, I guess in aword.
And so when we started SailAhead, my brother and I and we
just took one veteran sailingand we realized that this thing
(48:02):
that we're privileged to takefor granted, this sport, which
is kind of not for everyonebecause of the expensive nature
of it, once we realized howhelpful it could be, we just
wanted to keep doing it.
And since then, just the mostvaluable stories I have, the
(48:24):
most enriching experiences andthe best friends I've made have
all been through this.
So you, uh, you say uh, I'minspiring, or or what you said,
and I think, no, for me it'sjust uh, I'm being pulled, you
know it's uh, it's, it's um, I'mdoing it very selfishly, no,
I'm just kidding.
But it's provided me with suchimmense value throughout all
(48:48):
these years that that you knowthere's no way I'm not going to
keep going all these years thatyou know there's no way I'm not
going to keep going.
Thad David (49:00):
I know I talked to several people doing really
great things and that always isa big talking point or a
pinnacle is what you just sharedthat you know the people that
are giving out the most to otherpeople are usually that they
get the most in return and, likeyou said, it's pulling you
towards it and it's fascinating.
Thank you so much for takingthe time to jump on to share
everything that you're doing andif I can do anything to help
out, please don't hesitate toreach out.
Sean Duclay (49:23):
Well, thank you, thad.
You're already helping byhelping us to get the word out,
by asking me questions thatbring out the best stories.
So thank you very much Iappreciate it, thank you.
Popular Podcasts
United States of Kennedy
United States of Kennedy is a podcast about our cultural fascination with the Kennedy dynasty. Every week, hosts Lyra Smith and George Civeris go into one aspect of the Kennedy story.
Dateline NBC
Current and classic episodes, featuring compelling true-crime mysteries, powerful documentaries and in-depth investigations. Follow now to get the latest episodes of Dateline NBC completely free, or subscribe to Dateline Premium for ad-free listening and exclusive bonus content: DatelinePremium.com
Bookmarked by Reese's Book Club
Welcome to Bookmarked by Reese’s Book Club — the podcast where great stories, bold women, and irresistible conversations collide! Hosted by award-winning journalist Danielle Robay, each week new episodes balance thoughtful literary insight with the fervor of buzzy book trends, pop culture and more. Bookmarked brings together celebrities, tastemakers, influencers and authors from Reese's Book Club and beyond to share stories that transcend the page. Pull up a chair. You’re not just listening — you’re part of the conversation.