October 26, 2024 • 18 mins
There’s hidden ease all around us—if we take the time to notice it. In this episode, I share how to uncover the moments of simplicity, flow, and joy that already exist in your life.
Plus, explore these Messy Journaling Questions (MJQs) to deepen your reflection:
- Where am I insisting this is the only way to do something or have something?
- When do I use words like 'difficult' and 'hard work'?
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Speaker 1 (00:00):
Welcome to the Gentle Rebellion where overwhelm is
optional.
Hello, how are you doing?
Lovely to have you here with meagain this week.
I hope you had a good week.
At the risk of sounding reallysilly, I didn't know about
(00:21):
airport lounges.
I didn't know about airportlounges.
So by airport lounges I meanthese secret oasis where you pay
extra money before a flight togo and sit in there in comfort
and get fed endless food anddrinks.
To me it's magical.
I kind of knew of theirexistence as in you can see them
(00:43):
, can't you, when you're atairports Well, at least I've
seen them for years where it'slike this secret door or this
corridor with this sign going tosomething like a secret club,
which I assumed was forfirst-class travellers, paying
like £10,000 for a trip orsomething.
I didn't think it was availableto me.
I just it wasn't even on myradar and I wasn't resentful.
(01:06):
I don't have a problem with it.
I've, happily, every time I'vebeen to an airport in my life,
I've been excited.
So it's not like it's takenaway anything from my life, not
knowing that it was open to me.
And then, on the first day ofour road trip, I had this
amazing experience of being inan airport lounge Excuse the
(01:26):
noise just giving the dogs somebiscuits.
That odd noise.
If you heard it was Ruby on herback on the floor, legs in the
air, rolling around justcelebrating the day life, I
don't know.
Anyway, hopefully they'll be abit quieter for you now.
So airport lounges had no ideathey existed, turns out, they're
(01:48):
awesome.
So what happened was we gotBarclays travel insurance and
Simon chose the one that gaveyou extra things, and one of the
extra things was airportlounges.
Oh, my goodness, he was soexcited about his airport lounge
, and also he wanted to get hismoney's worth, that we went
early to the airport.
(02:09):
Now, I don't know about you,whether you're an early to the
airport or a late to the airportperson.
I was going to allow just twohours because I'd read that you
no longer have to do three hours.
I think airports have got a bitmore organised recently.
Well, at least my experiencehas been that they're running
really well now.
But no, apparently we needed togo for three hours so we could
(02:32):
get our money's worth andbasically eat everything in
sight, which I certainlycouldn't do.
But anyway, it was quiteamusing.
I cannot believe how wonderfulit was.
It just really, really added tothe adventure.
It felt like such luxury.
But for me also it was thatcalm, steadiness, so there's not
(02:54):
a lot of movement.
I mean there is movementobviously because people are
coming in and out of an airportlounge to catch their flight,
but in general it just feltcalmer, stiller, just easier,
and that ease, that comfort.
I could just sit and read mybook, oh my goodness.
So this got me thinking.
(03:18):
Airport lounges have been hiddenfrom me.
So what else is hidden from methat would make my life easier?
So the airport lounges havebeen there all the time.
I mean, I don't know thehistory of them, I don't really
care to look, but let's justassume the airport lounges have
been available to me all thistime, but I didn't realize it.
(03:40):
I wasn't aware of them, eventhough I'd glimpsed them out of
the corner of my eye.
So even when they did come intomy awareness, I turned away
from them, I switched off myawareness of them, because I
just made an assumption thatthey weren't available to me and
this wasn't true.
Now, obviously there are timesin my life when I had less money
(04:00):
, so maybe that was true, or Iwas in a hurry, so there would
be no point.
So there's all sorts of reasonswhy that would be
understandable.
So it's not a judgment.
It's not the point, is it?
What are our hidden airportlounges?
That's my point.
So to find the hidden airportlounges, I have to be able to
(04:24):
bring the hidden ways of havingmore ease into my awareness,
which means I have to assumethere are hidden eases available
to me.
And once I've made thatassumption, I can then look at
the world with this new andexciting gently rebellious lens.
Where is there hidden ease thatI'm not seeing or I'm
(04:48):
dismissing?
So the easiest ones to findwould be the ones that I'm
seeing but dismissing Seeingthem but dismissing them.
So that means there's anunderlying assumption that
they're not available to me.
So that's what I'm playing withthis week, and I'd like to
invite you to do it as well,because here's to finding more
(05:12):
hidden ease.
So I always want to start withthe easiest ones to let in.
I've no idea what these are now, because this is just something
I'm exploring, but who knowswhat's going to happen.
Do you want to play this gamewith me?
So this game is put on thegently rebellious lens of the
(05:33):
assumption is there is hiddenease, and now I'm going to look
for it and the easiest place tofind that is the ones that I'm
seeing but dismissing, and theseeing but then dismissing ones
are based on a belief or anassumption I'm making.
So this is an opportunity maybeto go a little bit deeper with
(05:54):
this, should you choose to, I'mgoing to play with it, but
gently and lightly, assumingnothing is wrong, dropping any
judgment any well, I ought to bebetter at valuing myself and
accepting.
Help, drop all the nonsense,normal judgment.
It's so boring and it just addsto the pressure and the
overwhelm.
So instead I'm going to inviteyou to just play with me,
(06:16):
because this is what I'm doing.
I'm going to play with this.
So I've got two messyjournaling questions here.
So, messy journaling.
There's a whole episode on that.
It sounds silly, but it's areally serious practice.
So the idea is that, instead ofjournaling and trying to keep
it all legible and really neatand trying really hard to find
the one correct answer or youknow, going back over time and
(06:41):
trying to record all of themesses up you made and analysing
it like serious journaling likethat.
Oh, my goodness, I do apologisefor my dogs.
Did you hear that?
That was Rosie, it's ridiculous.
Sorry, I don't know what to doabout it Apart from lock the
doors down.
Lock the doors, lock the doors,lock the dogs downstairs and
that just feels really mean andI know most of you enjoy hearing
(07:03):
the dogs, but that was a.
That was a weird piglet noisethere from Rosie.
Thank you very much.
So back to messy journaling.
Messy journaling is a way to getout of your head into your body
, connect to your body and yourheart and allow the words to go
move across the page.
So you're asking deeperquestions.
You allow the words to go moveacross the page, so you're
asking deeper questions.
You allow the words, if youchoose to, to resonate in every
cell in your body and then getcurious and just allow the pen
(07:27):
to move across the page and seewhat comes up.
And because what comes up tendsto be faster than the hand can
move, you're going to drop theneed to spell correctly, have
punctuation, even finishsentences, even finish words.
So it's messy, doesn't have tobe legible, because what you're
(07:50):
doing is allowing this deepconnection as easily as possible
and then you can just let go ofit.
So it's designed to bedestroyed afterwards.
It's not trying to keep arecord.
It's not heavy, it's just light.
It's just, it's curious.
It's curious and it's out ofthe head into the body, so you
can play with that.
There's a whole episode.
I'm not sure what episode is.
(08:11):
Might be 66.
Anyway, it's the first year ofthis podcast, so enjoy that.
There will also be blogarticles about it too, or you
can ask me a question.
You can just email me, heidi,at heidimarkcouk, and I will
tell you more if you like.
Okay, so these are thequestions for messy journaling
(08:32):
for this week.
Should you choose to accept theplay challenge?
Where am I insisting this is theonly way to do something or
have something?
Where am I insisting that thisis the only way to do something
or have something?
I hope you wrote that down ifyou want it.
(08:53):
So when we insist there's onlyone way, we restrict all of the
easier ways.
I do this all the time.
It's not just you, we all do itright, and sometimes there is
one way that's been working fora long time or kind of working,
and then it stops working aswell.
(09:14):
But we think, well, it did work, so I need to stick with it.
And sometimes it's just time tosay, well, there's some useful
information here.
It's not working as well as itwas, or it could be better.
Maybe in some way it could beeasier.
So I'm open to the idea thatthere's another way, even if I
can't see it, which brings meback to one of my well-known
(09:34):
sayings, which is trust.
There's always an easier way,especially when you can't find
one, especially when you can'tfind one, because that's when
the overwhelm's there.
If you can't see an easier way,just assume it's not you, it's
not life not being on your side.
You don't need to fight theuniverse, it's just overwhelm.
(09:55):
Nothing's wrong.
Get out of your head into yourbody.
Feel your feet on the groundand just allow easier ways to be
revealed to you by just lettinggo.
And I don't mean standing therein this kind of full sense of
yes, I'm just letting go, I'mrelaxed, and then expecting all
these ideas to come to you.
No, I literally mean feel yourfeet on the ground, allow your
(10:19):
belly to notice how you feel,notice how you feel neutrally,
ask a question.
So there's got to be an easierway.
I wonder what it is, get into astate of curiosity.
Let go get on with your day andwait for stuff to be revealed,
(10:44):
because the answers are alwaysall around us and with hindsight
we can see there is easier ways, right?
I mean, if you take big things,like a job that was killing you
because it was so stressful,when you look back you can see
that there were other optionsthat you couldn't see at the
time because you were stuck insurvival mode, which is chronic
overwhelm.
That's okay, that's normal.
(11:07):
That's okay, that's normal.
But using the wisdom ofhindsight now requires the same
thing If you clear the overwhelm, you get that now there are
always easier ways to do things.
There's a lot of hidden helpand freedom from restrictive
(11:28):
assumptions and beliefs, allsorts of things, because there's
all sorts of ways of livingyour life, because you're smart,
capable, highly driven, bighearted and determined to live
this full life, which means thatfor you especially, there are
lots of ways of doing things.
But it often takes a shift, andthe shift is usually the
(11:48):
letting go of the assumptionthat there's one right way of
doing it.
So that's the first messyjournaling question.
Where am I insisting?
This is the only way to dosomething or have something?
The last one?
There's only two.
Who wants more than that?
That's plenty right.
In fact, you've already gotenough.
You don't even have to get apen out if you don't want to.
Obviously, the second messyjournaling question gift to you
(12:10):
this week is to notice yourlanguage.
So to just watch your language.
When do I use words such asdifficult or hard work?
So this is related to theassumption that life is hard,
that everything worth havingrequires sacrifice, because if
that's true, then by definitionlife will be hard and you will
(12:36):
sacrifice your health, yourrelationships, your free time,
your ability to switch off andhear your partner speak.
You will sacrifice becauseyou're assuming that's the deal
you've made with the universe.
But not everybody lives thatway.
There's all sorts of ways ofliving, and finding the way that
works for you matters.
So let's just assume that lifedoesn't have to be hard and that
(12:58):
success doesn't require thesacrifice of your health and
relationships.
How would that change thingsfor you?
Well, hugely, and that is thewhole gentle rebellion.
But instead of that hugequestion, I invite you instead
to just watch your language.
And I don't mean watch yourlanguage as in catch yourself
out and try and change it.
No, I don't mean thought police.
(13:19):
I mean get curious about thewords you're using, because they
will reveal to you where yourhidden ease is.
So if you're saying but thatwould be too much hard work or
that would be really difficult.
So, for example, I'll give yousomething that I'm playing with
at the moment.
So we haven't finishedrenovating the house, but we
(13:41):
also want to do an extension.
But the extension is along-term thing and so it's
easier to think well, I'm noteven going to think about it
because it's not on the table atthe moment, but that's not much
fun.
And also it's easier to do itmore slowly, right, it's easier
to have plans and dreams andimagine them in and then get
(14:02):
focused on them and then nothave to wait.
So normally what happens is youdecide what you want to do and
then you have to wait for theworkman to be free.
Well, what if we do it theother way around?
And it's just easy and that'swhat I'm up to.
So I'm inviting somebody aroundto talk about what's possible
way before we've actually got akind of fixed plan, because
(14:23):
we're still renovating and alsowe've just been on a big
adventure, so a lot of therenovating money went on a huge
road trip, which is beautiful,and we've got another one
planned as well.
So you know, like there'schoices in life.
But it's easier and more fun to.
Well, I've decided it's easierand more fun to play with the
(14:44):
idea of what the extension wouldlook like, way before we're
actually seriously, you know.
So there's nothing concrete, sothere's no rush, there's no
hurry.
So before I was thinking well,it's too difficult to think
about it because we're not readyto do it, it's not on the cards
yet.
But then I've just shaken upand gone.
(15:06):
Yeah, but it might be fun todream and plan, and of course it
is because it takes a long timeactually.
Well, I find it takes a longtime to get two people's dreams
considered and in line andreally discussed.
Well, that's what I've learnedfrom being in a relationship for
a long time is that you need togive the other person time and
(15:29):
yourself time to consider, tothink oh well, if we did it that
way, what would this mean?
I know somebody who built theirown house or designed it
themselves and had it built orsomething like that, and I said,
oh, that must be wonderfulbecause you've got everything
where you wanted it.
And he said to me yes, but italso means that every time you
go to switch on a light switchthat's in the wrong place.
Only you are to blame, whichwas interesting, whereas if,
(15:57):
imagine, you just relax and youspend a long time thinking about
it, then are you more likely toallow more ideas to come up.
Anyway, this is just my ideathat, instead of assuming it's
difficult, what if I make iteasy?
Because while it's not highstakes, it will become high
stakes?
What it looks like Right nowit's no stakes, so fun, it's
(16:18):
just fun.
Anyway, that's quite a bigthing.
But often the things that wethink we're using words like
that would be hard work or it'sreally hard work to do that feel
like they're big things anyway.
So how about making themlighter?
Anyway, this isn't about the.
The invitation is actually much, much easier than that.
It's just the idea to getcurious about where your hidden
(16:39):
ease is by listening to yourselftalk.
That's it.
So, anyway, I'm going to bedoing these as well this week.
So if you want to drop me aline and let me know how you get
on, I'd love that.
I love it when people contactme.
I had two lovely messages thisweek about last week's Gently
Rebellious Read my newsletter,which is usually linked to what
(17:01):
I'm talking about in the podcast, and that was just.
It's just really nice.
It's always lovely to hear fromyou, so thank you when you
reach out, thank you to thosepeople.
It means a lot.
Okay, that's it, guys.
I wish you a week of lovelylittle moments that tickle your
(17:21):
heart and make you laugh outloud when you realise, oh, I've
been doing it the hard way, Icould have done it an easier,
easier way.
I wish you a week and a life,obviously, but this week let's
focus on hidden ease.
I wish you a week of findingdelightful, easier ways of doing
things.
Lots of hidden ease.
Enjoy For more resources tohelp you gently rebel.
Welcome to the Gentle Rebellion where overwhelm is
optional.
Hello, how are you doing?
Lovely to have you here with meagain this week.
I hope you had a good week.
At the risk of sounding reallysilly, I didn't know about
(00:21):
airport lounges.
I didn't know about airportlounges.
So by airport lounges I meanthese secret oasis where you pay
extra money before a flight togo and sit in there in comfort
and get fed endless food anddrinks.
To me it's magical.
I kind of knew of theirexistence as in you can see them
(00:43):
, can't you, when you're atairports Well, at least I've
seen them for years where it'slike this secret door or this
corridor with this sign going tosomething like a secret club,
which I assumed was forfirst-class travellers, paying
like £10,000 for a trip orsomething.
I didn't think it was availableto me.
I just it wasn't even on myradar and I wasn't resentful.
(01:06):
I don't have a problem with it.
I've, happily, every time I'vebeen to an airport in my life,
I've been excited.
So it's not like it's takenaway anything from my life, not
knowing that it was open to me.
And then, on the first day ofour road trip, I had this
amazing experience of being inan airport lounge Excuse the
(01:26):
noise just giving the dogs somebiscuits.
That odd noise.
If you heard it was Ruby on herback on the floor, legs in the
air, rolling around justcelebrating the day life, I
don't know.
Anyway, hopefully they'll be abit quieter for you now.
So airport lounges had no ideathey existed, turns out, they're
(01:48):
awesome.
So what happened was we gotBarclays travel insurance and
Simon chose the one that gaveyou extra things, and one of the
extra things was airportlounges.
Oh, my goodness, he was soexcited about his airport lounge
, and also he wanted to get hismoney's worth, that we went
early to the airport.
(02:09):
Now, I don't know about you,whether you're an early to the
airport or a late to the airportperson.
I was going to allow just twohours because I'd read that you
no longer have to do three hours.
I think airports have got a bitmore organised recently.
Well, at least my experiencehas been that they're running
really well now.
But no, apparently we needed togo for three hours so we could
(02:32):
get our money's worth andbasically eat everything in
sight, which I certainlycouldn't do.
But anyway, it was quiteamusing.
I cannot believe how wonderfulit was.
It just really, really added tothe adventure.
It felt like such luxury.
But for me also it was thatcalm, steadiness, so there's not
(02:54):
a lot of movement.
I mean there is movementobviously because people are
coming in and out of an airportlounge to catch their flight,
but in general it just feltcalmer, stiller, just easier,
and that ease, that comfort.
I could just sit and read mybook, oh my goodness.
So this got me thinking.
(03:18):
Airport lounges have been hiddenfrom me.
So what else is hidden from methat would make my life easier?
So the airport lounges havebeen there all the time.
I mean, I don't know thehistory of them, I don't really
care to look, but let's justassume the airport lounges have
been available to me all thistime, but I didn't realize it.
(03:40):
I wasn't aware of them, eventhough I'd glimpsed them out of
the corner of my eye.
So even when they did come intomy awareness, I turned away
from them, I switched off myawareness of them, because I
just made an assumption thatthey weren't available to me and
this wasn't true.
Now, obviously there are timesin my life when I had less money
(04:00):
, so maybe that was true, or Iwas in a hurry, so there would
be no point.
So there's all sorts of reasonswhy that would be
understandable.
So it's not a judgment.
It's not the point, is it?
What are our hidden airportlounges?
That's my point.
So to find the hidden airportlounges, I have to be able to
(04:24):
bring the hidden ways of havingmore ease into my awareness,
which means I have to assumethere are hidden eases available
to me.
And once I've made thatassumption, I can then look at
the world with this new andexciting gently rebellious lens.
Where is there hidden ease thatI'm not seeing or I'm
(04:48):
dismissing?
So the easiest ones to findwould be the ones that I'm
seeing but dismissing Seeingthem but dismissing them.
So that means there's anunderlying assumption that
they're not available to me.
So that's what I'm playing withthis week, and I'd like to
invite you to do it as well,because here's to finding more
(05:12):
hidden ease.
So I always want to start withthe easiest ones to let in.
I've no idea what these are now, because this is just something
I'm exploring, but who knowswhat's going to happen.
Do you want to play this gamewith me?
So this game is put on thegently rebellious lens of the
(05:33):
assumption is there is hiddenease, and now I'm going to look
for it and the easiest place tofind that is the ones that I'm
seeing but dismissing, and theseeing but then dismissing ones
are based on a belief or anassumption I'm making.
So this is an opportunity maybeto go a little bit deeper with
(05:54):
this, should you choose to, I'mgoing to play with it, but
gently and lightly, assumingnothing is wrong, dropping any
judgment any well, I ought to bebetter at valuing myself and
accepting.
Help, drop all the nonsense,normal judgment.
It's so boring and it just addsto the pressure and the
overwhelm.
So instead I'm going to inviteyou to just play with me,
(06:16):
because this is what I'm doing.
I'm going to play with this.
So I've got two messyjournaling questions here.
So, messy journaling.
There's a whole episode on that.
It sounds silly, but it's areally serious practice.
So the idea is that, instead ofjournaling and trying to keep
it all legible and really neatand trying really hard to find
the one correct answer or youknow, going back over time and
(06:41):
trying to record all of themesses up you made and analysing
it like serious journaling likethat.
Oh, my goodness, I do apologisefor my dogs.
Did you hear that?
That was Rosie, it's ridiculous.
Sorry, I don't know what to doabout it Apart from lock the
doors down.
Lock the doors, lock the doors,lock the dogs downstairs and
that just feels really mean andI know most of you enjoy hearing
(07:03):
the dogs, but that was a.
That was a weird piglet noisethere from Rosie.
Thank you very much.
So back to messy journaling.
Messy journaling is a way to getout of your head into your body
, connect to your body and yourheart and allow the words to go
move across the page.
So you're asking deeperquestions.
You allow the words to go moveacross the page, so you're
asking deeper questions.
You allow the words, if youchoose to, to resonate in every
cell in your body and then getcurious and just allow the pen
(07:27):
to move across the page and seewhat comes up.
And because what comes up tendsto be faster than the hand can
move, you're going to drop theneed to spell correctly, have
punctuation, even finishsentences, even finish words.
So it's messy, doesn't have tobe legible, because what you're
(07:50):
doing is allowing this deepconnection as easily as possible
and then you can just let go ofit.
So it's designed to bedestroyed afterwards.
It's not trying to keep arecord.
It's not heavy, it's just light.
It's just, it's curious.
It's curious and it's out ofthe head into the body, so you
can play with that.
There's a whole episode.
I'm not sure what episode is.
(08:11):
Might be 66.
Anyway, it's the first year ofthis podcast, so enjoy that.
There will also be blogarticles about it too, or you
can ask me a question.
You can just email me, heidi,at heidimarkcouk, and I will
tell you more if you like.
Okay, so these are thequestions for messy journaling
(08:32):
for this week.
Should you choose to accept theplay challenge?
Where am I insisting this is theonly way to do something or
have something?
Where am I insisting that thisis the only way to do something
or have something?
I hope you wrote that down ifyou want it.
(08:53):
So when we insist there's onlyone way, we restrict all of the
easier ways.
I do this all the time.
It's not just you, we all do itright, and sometimes there is
one way that's been working fora long time or kind of working,
and then it stops working aswell.
(09:14):
But we think, well, it did work, so I need to stick with it.
And sometimes it's just time tosay, well, there's some useful
information here.
It's not working as well as itwas, or it could be better.
Maybe in some way it could beeasier.
So I'm open to the idea thatthere's another way, even if I
can't see it, which brings meback to one of my well-known
(09:34):
sayings, which is trust.
There's always an easier way,especially when you can't find
one, especially when you can'tfind one, because that's when
the overwhelm's there.
If you can't see an easier way,just assume it's not you, it's
not life not being on your side.
You don't need to fight theuniverse, it's just overwhelm.
(09:55):
Nothing's wrong.
Get out of your head into yourbody.
Feel your feet on the groundand just allow easier ways to be
revealed to you by just lettinggo.
And I don't mean standing therein this kind of full sense of
yes, I'm just letting go, I'mrelaxed, and then expecting all
these ideas to come to you.
No, I literally mean feel yourfeet on the ground, allow your
(10:19):
belly to notice how you feel,notice how you feel neutrally,
ask a question.
So there's got to be an easierway.
I wonder what it is, get into astate of curiosity.
Let go get on with your day andwait for stuff to be revealed,
(10:44):
because the answers are alwaysall around us and with hindsight
we can see there is easier ways, right?
I mean, if you take big things,like a job that was killing you
because it was so stressful,when you look back you can see
that there were other optionsthat you couldn't see at the
time because you were stuck insurvival mode, which is chronic
overwhelm.
That's okay, that's normal.
(11:07):
That's okay, that's normal.
But using the wisdom ofhindsight now requires the same
thing If you clear the overwhelm, you get that now there are
always easier ways to do things.
There's a lot of hidden helpand freedom from restrictive
(11:28):
assumptions and beliefs, allsorts of things, because there's
all sorts of ways of livingyour life, because you're smart,
capable, highly driven, bighearted and determined to live
this full life, which means thatfor you especially, there are
lots of ways of doing things.
But it often takes a shift, andthe shift is usually the
(11:48):
letting go of the assumptionthat there's one right way of
doing it.
So that's the first messyjournaling question.
Where am I insisting?
This is the only way to dosomething or have something?
The last one?
There's only two.
Who wants more than that?
That's plenty right.
In fact, you've already gotenough.
You don't even have to get apen out if you don't want to.
Obviously, the second messyjournaling question gift to you
(12:10):
this week is to notice yourlanguage.
So to just watch your language.
When do I use words such asdifficult or hard work?
So this is related to theassumption that life is hard,
that everything worth havingrequires sacrifice, because if
that's true, then by definitionlife will be hard and you will
(12:36):
sacrifice your health, yourrelationships, your free time,
your ability to switch off andhear your partner speak.
You will sacrifice becauseyou're assuming that's the deal
you've made with the universe.
But not everybody lives thatway.
There's all sorts of ways ofliving, and finding the way that
works for you matters.
So let's just assume that lifedoesn't have to be hard and that
(12:58):
success doesn't require thesacrifice of your health and
relationships.
How would that change thingsfor you?
Well, hugely, and that is thewhole gentle rebellion.
But instead of that hugequestion, I invite you instead
to just watch your language.
And I don't mean watch yourlanguage as in catch yourself
out and try and change it.
No, I don't mean thought police.
(13:19):
I mean get curious about thewords you're using, because they
will reveal to you where yourhidden ease is.
So if you're saying but thatwould be too much hard work or
that would be really difficult.
So, for example, I'll give yousomething that I'm playing with
at the moment.
So we haven't finishedrenovating the house, but we
(13:41):
also want to do an extension.
But the extension is along-term thing and so it's
easier to think well, I'm noteven going to think about it
because it's not on the table atthe moment, but that's not much
fun.
And also it's easier to do itmore slowly, right, it's easier
to have plans and dreams andimagine them in and then get
(14:02):
focused on them and then nothave to wait.
So normally what happens is youdecide what you want to do and
then you have to wait for theworkman to be free.
Well, what if we do it theother way around?
And it's just easy and that'swhat I'm up to.
So I'm inviting somebody aroundto talk about what's possible
way before we've actually got akind of fixed plan, because
(14:23):
we're still renovating and alsowe've just been on a big
adventure, so a lot of therenovating money went on a huge
road trip, which is beautiful,and we've got another one
planned as well.
So you know, like there'schoices in life.
But it's easier and more fun to.
Well, I've decided it's easierand more fun to play with the
(14:44):
idea of what the extension wouldlook like, way before we're
actually seriously, you know.
So there's nothing concrete, sothere's no rush, there's no
hurry.
So before I was thinking well,it's too difficult to think
about it because we're not readyto do it, it's not on the cards
yet.
But then I've just shaken upand gone.
(15:06):
Yeah, but it might be fun todream and plan, and of course it
is because it takes a long timeactually.
Well, I find it takes a longtime to get two people's dreams
considered and in line andreally discussed.
Well, that's what I've learnedfrom being in a relationship for
a long time is that you need togive the other person time and
(15:29):
yourself time to consider, tothink oh well, if we did it that
way, what would this mean?
I know somebody who built theirown house or designed it
themselves and had it built orsomething like that, and I said,
oh, that must be wonderfulbecause you've got everything
where you wanted it.
And he said to me yes, but italso means that every time you
go to switch on a light switchthat's in the wrong place.
Only you are to blame, whichwas interesting, whereas if,
(15:57):
imagine, you just relax and youspend a long time thinking about
it, then are you more likely toallow more ideas to come up.
Anyway, this is just my ideathat, instead of assuming it's
difficult, what if I make iteasy?
Because while it's not highstakes, it will become high
stakes?
What it looks like Right nowit's no stakes, so fun, it's
(16:18):
just fun.
Anyway, that's quite a bigthing.
But often the things that wethink we're using words like
that would be hard work or it'sreally hard work to do that feel
like they're big things anyway.
So how about making themlighter?
Anyway, this isn't about the.
The invitation is actually much, much easier than that.
It's just the idea to getcurious about where your hidden
(16:39):
ease is by listening to yourselftalk.
That's it.
So, anyway, I'm going to bedoing these as well this week.
So if you want to drop me aline and let me know how you get
on, I'd love that.
I love it when people contactme.
I had two lovely messages thisweek about last week's Gently
Rebellious Read my newsletter,which is usually linked to what
(17:01):
I'm talking about in the podcast, and that was just.
It's just really nice.
It's always lovely to hear fromyou, so thank you when you
reach out, thank you to thosepeople.
It means a lot.
Okay, that's it, guys.
I wish you a week of lovelylittle moments that tickle your
(17:21):
heart and make you laugh outloud when you realise, oh, I've
been doing it the hard way, Icould have done it an easier,
easier way.
I wish you a week and a life,obviously, but this week let's
focus on hidden ease.
I wish you a week of findingdelightful, easier ways of doing
things.
Lots of hidden ease.
Enjoy For more resources tohelp you gently rebel.
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