Feeling like your once-reliable planner just can’t keep up with your real life anymore?
Whether it’s a new job, a second kid, or just life getting more complicated, many professional women hit a wall where their old systems break down. In this episode, attorney-turned-time-management-expert Kelly Nolan shares how she went from burnout to building the Bright Method™—a scheduling system designed for the invisible load women carry.
In this episode, you will:
- Discover the common tipping points that make your trusted planning system obsolete
- Learn how the Bright Method™ addresses the real mental load that traditional time management ignores
- Get a step-by-step look at how to reclaim control using digital calendaring and a weekly two-week planning routine
If you’re ready to stop drowning in to-dos and finally see your real capacity, hit play and learn how to bring structure and calm back into your week.
Featured on the podcast:
The Bright Method website
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Life can be overwhelming, but on this podcast, you'll discover practical strategies to overcome overwhelm, imposter syndrome, and negative self-talk, manage time effectively, set boundaries, and stay productive in high-stress jobs—all while learning how to say no and prioritize self-care on the Overwhelmed Worki...
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Episode Transcript
Available transcripts are automatically generated. Complete accuracy is not guaranteed.
Kelly Nolan (00:05):
I'm going to clutter up your calendar, but
I'm going to lighten up yourmind.
And to me, that is the muchhigher priority here.
Michelle Gauthier (00:14):
Working Woman the podcast that helps you be
more calm and more productive bydoing less.
I'm your host, Michelle Gauthier, a former overwhelmed working
woman and current life coach.
On this show, we unpack thestress and pressure that today's
working woman experiences andin each episode you'll get a
(00:37):
strategy to bring more calm,ease and relaxation to your life
.
Hi friend, if you've ever feltlike you're drowning in your
to-do list, raising my handright now or falling constantly
behind or just feeling guiltythat you still can't seem to do
it all, this episode is going tobe great for you.
(00:59):
My guest today is Kelly Nolan.
I'm so excited to have her on.
I basically stalked her down totry to get her to come and talk
to you guys, because I lovewhat she's doing.
She is a former patent attorneyand now she is a time
management expert and she's thefounder of something called the
Bright Method, which is apractical, really structured
system designed specifically forus professional women who are
(01:21):
juggling a million things andfeeling stretched too thin.
So when you listen to Kelly'sinterview today, you're going to
hear why your current timemanagement system might be
failing you and how to createone that actually works for your
real life, and how to uncoverand manage the invisible to-do
list that's draining your energy.
It was really interesting inour conversation thinking about
all the things that we do thataren't anywhere on our to-do
(01:45):
list or on our calendar, andthen she's going to teach us,
too, the key to using yourcalendar as a powerful tool for
clarity and confidence andboundary setting.
I'm really excited to have youon today.
I absolutely love what you'redoing and I can't wait to hear
about it, but tell us first howyou got into being a time
(02:06):
management expert from aftergoing to law school and being a
patent lawyer, sure thing.
Kelly Nolan (02:12):
So I basically had been organized most of my life
on the you know, I had my paperplanners did okay, I would say
organized on the time front.
On that front my physicalorganization skills are not up
to snuff, but I had beenorganized and my systems of
paper planners had gotten me farand things were going well.
And then I became an actualattorney and I got really
(02:34):
overwhelmed pretty quickly.
I looked like I had it togetheron the outside, I was hitting
deadlines, all of that, butinside I was way too anxious,
way too stretched thin when Ihad time.
You know, outside of being anactual lawyer I just couldn't
focus on my friends.
I was constantly thinking aboutwork and worrying about things
and just was like this cannot.
(02:54):
And I looked for timemanagement help.
This was probably like 2012, 13,somewhere in there and there
just wasn't much help out there.
Or, candidly, looking back, alot of it was from men who
probably had a lot more supportat home than I did as a single
(03:17):
person as an attorney, and Istruggled for help, couldn't
make anything stick, and thenslowly over time, started
cobbling together what I thoughtof as my own weird little
system for managing my time, andI kept practicing.
I thought that the system I'dcome up with was just helping me
get to where everybody elsealready was.
That's how it felt at the time,and it wasn't until years later
(03:38):
that I realized oh, otherpeople feel like I felt, and so
I started teaching timemanagement, and that's what I do
now.
I teach what now I call theBright Method.
My own weird little system isnow rebranded into something
that sounds cool.
Michelle Gauthier (03:50):
Yes, it does.
I love the name.
I love the name.
Yeah, that is so cool.
Okay, so when you said youteach the Bright Method, how do
you teach it?
Like, if somebody wants tolearn about it, is it a class?
Do they work with youone-on-one?
Kelly Nolan (04:11):
Yep.
So historically, I've run it intwo eight-week programs each
year, usually start of thecalendar year and the start of
the school year.
In this fall, in 2025, I'm goingto be starting to run it more
open so that people can joinwhen it's best for them, because
it is a time-consuming processto learn, which is a little
ironic when you're feelingstrapped on time, and so I want
people to be able to jump inwhen it works for them, and so I
should be still hammering outall the details, but opening it
(04:34):
kind of like at the first ofeach month between September and
probably April, and what it isis I walk people through step by
step, through learning thesystem and kind of like four
chapters and dig into it, andthen we have a couple of weeks
where we run the whole systemout together and happy to go
into it more.
Michelle Gauthier (04:51):
Yes, I definitely want to hear all
about it, because one of the bigpillars that we talk about on
this podcast is time management.
Lots of things that come in tocause overwhelm, but I feel like
being able to efficiently andeffectively manage your time is
a huge portion of what causesoverwhelm.
So I definitely want to ask youabout that.
(05:12):
How did you know that it justwasn't?
You said you had this papersystem that you would use, and
then something happened and thatjust didn't work anymore.
What was that thing like?
Because my clients will talkabout how they've been able to
handle things for a long timeand all of a sudden they're
completely overwhelmed.
Was it a specific thing, or canyou say what it was for you for
(05:35):
?
Kelly Nolan (05:35):
me well taking a step back.
I just I think my belief andit's just my, you know, based on
the clients I work with is thata lot of us have systems that
get us very far and then there'ssome tipping point in life that
happens that life becomes morecomplicated and the systems that
got us far just can't keep up.
For me I was an early bloomer,it was my first real job.
(05:59):
For other people it's becominga manager, becoming an executive
.
It might be switching to adifferent company.
It might be having a first kidmaybe having a second kid.
It can be a lot of differentthings, maybe helping a parent.
There are a lot of tippingpoints where again, life gets
more complicated and suddenlythis system that you always use
(06:19):
to give you clarity no longer ismaking you feel the way you
want to feel inside and givingyou that clarity.
And, at least for past me, Iwas like, well, I've always used
the system, it's always worked,so it must be me when in
reality I think it's just asystem failure, that it can't.
It just can't keep.
Michelle Gauthier (06:35):
Yes, yes, okay.
Yeah, that's very in line withwhat I hear about overwhelm in
general.
Where I've been fine, I've beenan overachiever all my life,
I've managed all these things, Iwill say often, the second baby
is the put it over the edge.
You can't just can't manage allthe things at the same time.
So that makes sense, that yousee that one too Okay.
(06:55):
So tell me about the brightmethod.
I love the name, first of all,and since you were a patent
lawyer, I love that it has alittle TM after it too.
It's official.
Of course you're going to coverdown on that.
So tell me what it is as a timemanagement system and like how
it's different from your basictime management system.
Kelly Nolan (07:20):
Yeah, well, I think it's just really geared towards
helping professional workingwomen, and I think that what
I've realized is, in the past, alot of the systems I had tried
before again were often by men,and it's no knock on men, but
typically, very broadly,generally speaking, men usually
have more support from theirspouse at home than women do,
and double whammy women areoften providing that support, so
(07:41):
there's even more on theirplate, and so really, what I
think it comes down to that's adifferentiator is that it helps
with the mental load that goeswith all the roles and we can
get into that, and it also helpspeople draw boundaries in a
more clear way, but in a waythat works for women.
Like you have to, we have to becomfortable to draw boundaries,
(08:03):
comfortable enough and like knowhow to phrase it, because we
know it comes off differentlywhen women draw boundaries than
men and things like that, and soI like working on that with
women as well, and I find thatwe'll talk about it more.
But like what the bright methodgives you helps you feel more
confident standing in your knowor drawing a boundary, whatever
it might be, because you feellike you have a better sense
(08:24):
that your boundary isobjectively reasonable, given
everything on your plate.
Michelle Gauthier (08:31):
Okay, that makes sense.
Like you can look at it and seeyeah, I'm not just saying I
don't have enough time, I haveeverything, the system and the
way we'll talk about it just iseverything's visual.
Kelly Nolan (09:01):
You can see it.
I can look at my calendar andsee what's on my plate and see
what has to move and push backand be like, no, I have this
other deadline at this time, andit just gives you a lot of
clarity.
That I just was.
I was lacking before.
Michelle Gauthier (09:13):
Yes, absolutely, and I think, at
least in my experience withworking in corporate, a lot of
companies' cultures are builtaround the idea.
I'm assuming law is definitelyin the same thing, where working
a ton, working many hours, thatwhole, well, this has to be
done tomorrow.
I don't know how you're goingto get it done, but it has to be
(09:35):
done tomorrow.
And so the thought of havinglike a fully laid out here's
everything I'm working on,here's how long it's going to
take I mean I just feel calminside thinking about that.
Kelly Nolan (09:45):
I love that.
Michelle Gauthier (09:46):
Yeah, so how do we get there?
I know it's much that we cancover on like a 30 minute
podcast, but just high level.
What is the right method?
Kelly Nolan (09:54):
So basically what it is is, even though I was a
paper planner lover again, Ijust don't think it could keep
up with life, and so I do go allin on a digital calendar.
Just to be really clear, Istill process paper and pen.
I have a legal pad right nextto me still, but when it comes
to actually managing time andunderstanding where time is
going, I do think a digitalcalendar just can't be beat.
(10:15):
So I focus on that.
It's either Outlook, google,apple, some combination of those
, and so we leverage thosesystems with a lot of smart
strategies.
So in chapter one, what we do iswe dig into the invisible
personal to-do list, so kind ofeverything we're managing at
home.
If you really think about, like, especially your mornings and
(10:36):
your evenings, all the thingsthat we do like showering and
getting ready, walking your dog,making meals if you have little
kids, bed and bath times withkids if you have older kids,
homework, like if you don't havekids, all the other things that
we do with our time all ofthose things take up a ton of
mental space, but they also takeup hours of our day and, oh my
(10:56):
gosh, I have to pause for asecond because I've literally
never thought about my taking ashower and getting ready as like
a to do list item, an invisibleto do list item.
Michelle Gauthier (11:06):
But you do have to build that, you know, 45
minutes or whatever, especiallyif I have to dry my hair.
Yeah, takes a while.
Kelly Nolan (11:14):
Yeah, yeah.
And that's what I love aboutthis is it's exactly what you're
saying is we don't tend to putit on our calendar, we don't
tend to tend to put it on a todo list, and yet that and all
those other things I mentionedwe're playing that jigsaw puzzle
in our head here is do all ofthat but then put it in the
(11:40):
calendar.
And what I love about a digitalcalendar is you can repeat
things you know every workday orevery Monday, wednesday, it
looks like this you can repeatthem and then you move them
around Like I'm not like, andthen you live it your life
rigidly, like.
That's not the point.
It's just get all the thingsthat you already are juggling
out of your head and into asystem so you can see them
visually and understand.
Does this even work?
(12:01):
And sometimes you see, oh, I'vebeen trying to do an hour and a
half of things in an hour andthat's why my mornings are tough
.
And I can readjust then, andalso it shows you what's left
over, like what your actualcapacity is to do other things,
and that's really important,because often we're like I have
12 hours to figure out what todo today and in reality, four or
five of those hours are takenup by all the things that we
(12:23):
just talked about, and so it's agood reality check on what is
your actual capacity.
So that's where we start.
When is your energy great?
How do you want to match makethat?
What are your high energythings?
How do you plan you know?
(12:44):
How much email do you deal withevery day?
How are we going to protect atleast some time for that?
It doesn't have to be.
You know, email is a good nookand cranny activity, but it also
.
If you have five hours of emailevery day, you should probably
block at least three hours onyour calendar for it, Things
like that.
Chapter three is really when weget into more of the one-off
to-do list stuff.
That's where a lot of peoplelike to start with time blocking
, and I think that's often a bigmistake and an understandable
(13:05):
one.
That people make is they hearabout time blocking and putting
things in your calendar andyou're like, cool, I'm going to
start doing that.
But again, if you are lookingat 12 hours of free time, you
time block that beautifully.
Michelle Gauthier (13:14):
forget all the invisible stuff then you
don't have a realistic game planand then you think the plan
doesn't work.
Yes, when really it's justyou're not considering
everything.
Ok, that makes a lot of sense.
Kelly Nolan (13:25):
Yeah, you either blame yourself or you blame time
blocking without realizing.
You know it's a totallyunderstandable mistake to make,
but that can help.
A lot is starting where westart.
And then the last component isthere are a couple of planning
sessions I recommend likeannually and things like that,
but the big one is a weeklyplanning session that I love to
hold on Fridays, maybe Thursdaysif Fridays are tough for you,
(13:46):
if your energy is too low.
Michelle Gauthier (13:49):
And what do you do on Friday?
Kelly Nolan (13:51):
So I am a big proponent of really being clear
about what you're trying toaccomplish and when we talk
about what I think a successfulplanning session looks like, it
can be about two hours.
I like to be really realisticabout planning and time
management in general and so inthat planning session, high
level overview is.
(14:13):
Step one is gather all theaction items that have come at
you, flown at you over the weekfrom all the different places
and that can look different forpeople.
That can look differently.
You know if you're in Slack orTeams or email or your head, or
just even looking at yourproject overview, I teach a
bird's eye view of like what areall the things on your plate?
Michelle Gauthier (14:33):
Think about all of those.
Kelly Nolan (14:34):
But it also can be your natural tendencies.
Like I, if I'm on the go, I useApple reminders just to capture
to-dos, and so one of my lineitems during that week is to go
look at my reminders and pullout all of the to-dos and then
bridge them to the calendar,make sure you kind of have
(15:00):
captured everything you need todo and roughly throw it in the
calendar when you think it'sgoing to happen, when you think
you need to do.
It can be next week, be threeweeks from now, could be three
months from now.
And then step two is kind ofsmoothing out the next two weeks
.
I like planning two weeks at atime.
I just think it's reallyhelpful to have a little bit of
a broader view than just a week,and that can be smoothing
things out.
You, you know, pushing thingsout, prioritizing within the
calendar, that kind of stuff.
(15:20):
It can also be looking at childcare planning, you know, just
making sure you have extra childcare where you need it, extra
pet care, things like that Okay.
Michelle Gauthier (15:29):
Okay, that makes sense.
I like the concept.
I've never thought about doingtwo weeks out until I started
listening to your podcast, and Ithink it's a really interesting
concept, because then you kindof have already done a once over
on the week you're on and thenyou're doing the long view on
the second week, so that justsort of once you get into that
rhythm, I bet that feels reallygood, where you can kind of fine
(15:50):
tune the week that's coming upand you're not starting from
scratch.
Kelly Nolan (15:53):
Yeah, and I think that there are some things that
we see, and I should say, evenfarther than two weeks out, that
you're like oh man, I got tostart working on that now you
don't want to just see somethingand I will say that's a line
item and kind of that.
Step one is you don'tnecessarily have to back out and
plan out how you're going toaccomplish all your projects in
like, let's say, the next threemonths during a planning session
(16:16):
.
But pretend you're a lawyer.
When I was a litigator you knowthere's some deadlines that you
just want to scan the nextthree months and make sure that
type of deadline's not on there,because if you have like a
motion for summary judgment.
You need to know that threemonths in advance and maybe more
.
And so you?
That's the type of stuff thatyou don't.
Again, you don't have to likeevery deadline you see in the
next three months, figure outhow you're going to accomplish
(16:43):
it, but you want to see thosebig ones and you want to be kind
of consistently looking at thehorizon for those two.
Michelle Gauthier (16:45):
Okay, okay, that makes sense.
And what are some of the thingsthat the women who are in your
group and learning your methods?
What are some of the thingsthat they object to or struggle
with in terms of getting all oftheir time on paper?
Like, do they say I can't dothis, or it takes too much time
to plan it, or it's toostructured, like, what are some
(17:05):
of the objections that someonemight have if they're going from
paper planning or very looseplanning to this method?
That's much more strategic andspecific.
Kelly Nolan (17:16):
Yep, I would say the biggest initial one is this
looks really overwhelming.
There is a lot in there, and Ido teach tech strategies to help
it not be quite so overwhelming, but it is.
I mean, we are putting a lotmore in your calendar than you
probably have traditionally doneand I think that people are
(17:40):
suddenly like I don't, this isover.
I don't like it, and what Iencourage people to do is think
this is just reflecting whatyou're already doing with your
time.
You're just now having to seeit and confront it, but it's
already what you were doing withyour time Again before.
You might've just held all ofthe things you're seeing in your
head, where now we're justgetting it out of your head and
(18:03):
into a calendar that we can playwith and we can be flexible
with it.
We don't have to live with thisrigidly, but now we get to play
with it outside of our brains,and what I really think about it
is.
The other thing I would say,too, is often the calendar looks
and feels overwhelming to readthrough, because it's a great
(18:24):
red flag that you are trying todo too much.
To me, there's such a simpleelegance of a digital calendar
that there's only so much space.
There are only so many blocksof things that are going to fit
in there.
Much space, there are only somany blocks of things that are
going to fit in there.
And if it is overwhelming andyou're tightening things up to
try and fit it in and all thatkind of stuff, that's just a red
flag for you that you're tryingto do an objectively
(18:47):
unrealistic amount of things.
And that can be hard.
I'm not saying that.
I mean there's a lot offrustration in that, but I
really encourage people to runtowards that front end
frustration because it will saveyou day to day living from
stress if you are planning morerealistically.
Michelle Gauthier (19:04):
Yes, I feel like your point I love.
I just want to repeat, becauseit was so good is that your
digital calendar might look morecluttered than you're used to
seeing, but your brain feels somuch more clear and you and I
both know from working withwomen who feel overwhelmed that
when your brain is clear you canmake actual progress on things.
(19:24):
When your brain is cluttered,you can't even decide what to
start on because you're just inthat space of overwhelm.
This is just reminding me ofwhen I first got divorced and I
was trying to figure out havingmy own business, being a single
mom and the finances of that.
I had to go and start checkingall my bank transactions every
(19:45):
day and it's one of those thingsyou want to look at for the
listener I'm covering my eye andkind of looking away like.
I don't even want to see howmany times I went to Starbucks
last week and I came from aprevious life where I wouldn't
have even thought about that orworried about that.
So it did kind of give me like astress response to see them.
But the more that I looked atthem yeah, and just like you
(20:08):
said, it's a quick red flag Ifyou're spending more than you're
actually bringing in you'relike, oh OK, I'm overspent on
this.
And it's very similar to whatyou're talking about with the
calendar.
And now when I don't look at thetransactions I feel anxious,
like I want to see them all comein so I can be like yeah, I
know that one, I chose to spendthat one, so it feels completely
(20:28):
different.
So I like that.
It's kind of like getting usedto the idea of seeing all these
things outside of your brain,when we're used to carrying them
around in our brain Absolutely.
Yeah, that's awesome.
So you work, are basicallyworking all the time with women
who feel stretched too thin whenthey realize they can't do it
(20:50):
all or that they're there haveway more things on their to do
list than they can actually do.
If they feel bad about that orguilty about that, how do you
advise them?
What should they do?
Yeah, got more than they canactually handle.
Kelly Nolan (21:05):
Well, they're kind of two big different approaches,
based on personal andprofessional, because obviously
in some we have more controlthan the other.
Sometimes, on the personal sideof things, I do feel like a lot
of us put a lot of pressure onourselves on the personal front,
whether it's goal setting orhouse projects or whatever it is
, and there can be a real, youknow, confrontation moment with
(21:28):
yourself on the expectationsthat we're putting on ourselves.
Let's say you've come to therealization that you can't do it
all, but now you're like.
But now what do I do?
There are a couple of differentapproaches.
One, I think, is having a greatlike, having a place.
I think of this as my bird'seye view.
That I was mentioning is kindof like the overview in my
business or your professionallife, and then the overview in
(21:50):
your personal life, like the bigbuckets of things, not all the
little big buckets In mybusiness.
It's also like you know themain projects I'm working on at
a time, maybe the products I'mselling and your career.
(22:12):
It might be like your owncareer goals those like kind of
big bucket type things and thenalso all of your active projects
and maybe some of your likeback burner type projects.
And speaking of the back burnerthing on your personal life and
your business life, I think it'sreally helpful to have some
sort of back burner column thatyou can park things that you're
not going to do right now.
(22:33):
Or an alternative is you justkeep a list of some somewhere
that, let's say, you have a lotof house projects you want to do
.
You have like a house projectapple note in that planning
session.
What you do is remind yourselfto go, look at those places and
evaluate.
Do I want to do one of thesethings now?
And I find that just havingsomewhere I can park those
(22:54):
things that I'm kind of comingto terms, that I can't do right
now, having somewhere to parkthem and know I'll revisit them
each week or each month, reallyhelps me.
Let them go and take thepressure off of.
I think sometimes we kind oflike think about things or feel
like we have to do them becausewe're afraid we're going to
forget if we don't.
Michelle Gauthier (23:10):
And as long as you can kind of park,
something that's good.
Kelly Nolan (23:13):
I kind of went off on a tangent there, going to
like, let's say, I have too muchto do.
That's.
One option is to kind of lookat all the things, brain dump
them, if you want to, and pullout anything that can wait.
Put them on one of those backburner columns or those lists or
(23:34):
calendar out six months fromnow, consider doing this, and
just then get it off your braindump to-do list type thing and
just start calling out what canI punt out, what can I really
punt out.
Then move for the more shorterterm things and then the medium
ground.
That's really good on thepersonal front, where we a
little bit have some morecontrol over what we do In the
professional life.
That can be obviously harderand what I really recommend
(23:55):
doing this is harder than itsounds, but I also think it's
doable is what is the topdepartment organization,
whatever you want to think about, what is the top goal we're
working towards right now andwhich of these projects support
that and which ones don't andcould be punted out.
And if you have the autonomy tomake some of those calls and
(24:16):
say, actually we're going toprioritize these three things,
and part of prioritizing ismaking sure we have the time and
energy as a team to do them,and that requires eliminating
other things.
Then you can make those toughcalls.
I find having the clarity ofwhat's the one goal we're
working on right now to reallyhelp with that.
If you can't make those calls,though, that helps you go into a
(24:36):
conversation with the data atyour fingertips in that way and
say, hey, from where I'm sittingright now, this is the top goal
.
Given that, I think these arethe projects we should
prioritize.
I do not think we canaccomplish these other things
and those three things and Iwant to make sure we get those
top three priorities projectsdone, even if you're wrong on
(24:56):
what the top goal is.
That conversation just exhibitssuch leadership to me and
strategic thinking, versus justgoing in and being like I am
overwhelmed.
Yeah.
Michelle Gauthier (25:05):
I can't do all of this.
Kelly Nolan (25:11):
Yeah, but I feel about this approach is you're
demonstrating leadership, whichI think often we shy away from
these conversations becausewe're afraid we'll come off as
weak.
Michelle Gauthier (25:14):
where this, I think you can come off as
strong, even if you're wrongagain on what the top priority
is yes, exactly If I'm thinkingabout a former employee coming
to me and saying these are allthe things I'm working on.
I think these are the top threepriorities.
I can't get to these other two.
I'd be so delighted, instead ofjust saying I don't know what
to do.
I'm overwhelmed.
You know that really shows likeinitiative and leadership.
Kelly Nolan (25:36):
Yeah, I think the final great part of that too is
hopefully you're getting to thenkeep and move forward with
projects you're also reallyenjoying.
And I think that part of thebeauty of coming up with
solutions in these things ishopefully the solution you want
that they then pick up on andrun with.
And I will say just to berealistic, I've had clients
where a lot of theseconversations have gone really
(25:57):
well.
Often, I think, bosses have noidea what's fully on your plate
and had no idea that you were inso many meetings that you want
to eliminate some meetings orhave so many projects they don't
know, and so there are a lot ofgreat bosses out there who I've
been pleasantly delighted havebeen, have had great responses,
and then there's some thathaven't, and I've had that in my
own life and to me, boundariesin the way that we're talking
(26:20):
about essentially still workeven when they don't, because
they show you the person's truecolors, and that is really good
data for you to know.
Moving forward Doesn't mean youhave to leave the job right
away, but I do think it helpsinform how much of our life are
we willing to sacrifice for thisjob that's not willing to show
up for us in that way?
(26:40):
So, yeah, it's still reallygood data too.
Michelle Gauthier (26:42):
Yes, interesting information, yes,
yes, okay, great.
I love this whole method andconcept and I think that once
you have the faith in yourcalendar and you believe that if
something's on your calendar itwill get done, it feels great
to put like I just kickedsomething out to June and I'm
not going to give it any thoughtuntil I get there.
And when I get to June I'mgoing to be surprised.
(27:04):
I'll be like, oh yeah, that'sgreat, I forgot about this.
Yeah, I feel I can rest assuredthat I don't have to think
about it because I know I havethis system and that's how I
work it.
And when I get there I'llevaluate Is it June or is it
going to go to August, or isthis the month that I work on it
?
So even if you are listeningand thinking, oh my gosh, that
sounds so overwhelming, it feelslike one of those things that
(27:27):
might be surge overwhelming,like it might be overwhelming at
first, but once you get it andyou have the system, you can
feel so much calmer.
Kelly Nolan (27:35):
Yeah, I completely agree.
I love it.
I love your point on that.
You'll get to June and be like,oh yeah, because like that in
and of itself is valuable,because then your energy about
it is fresh, in and of itself isvaluable, because then your
energy about it is fresh,there's excitement versus if you
are staring this down on yourto-do list for until June and
you're going to be like alreadysick of it and tired of it
exactly I hate there's a realdifference.
Michelle Gauthier (27:57):
I only like on my calendar what I'm going to
actually do that week, yeah.
Kelly Nolan (28:02):
I think that's great, yes.
Michelle Gauthier (28:03):
Yes, Okay, great.
Well, I want to ask you the twoquestions that I ask every
guest.
The first one is what issomething that you do when you
feel overwhelmed to makeyourself feel better?
Kelly Nolan (28:16):
Well, candidly, my first reaction is to protect
energy as best I can.
So, as lame as it sounds,prioritizing sleep and,
unfortunately, cutting outalcohol, I have found to be
really good.
Like, everything's better whenyou have energy, so when you're
overwhelmed more energy is notgoing to hurt.
So that's really valuable On thetime management front, I would
(28:36):
say, is really identifyingwhat's stressing me out, what's
the real issue or issuesstressing me out, and then
thinking about how can I use mycalendar to help me see how this
can get done.
So if there was a work meetingthat is causing a lot of
overwhelm and anxiety, it'sreally just sitting down with a
paper and pen and being likewhat are all the things I have
(28:58):
to do to make this meeting asuccess?
I got to draft the slides.
I might have to edit the slides.
I might need to get data fromsomeone.
I need to polish it.
I'm going to want to practicethe presentation, probably twice
.
I need to figure out what I'mgoing to wear.
I'm going to need to go to thedry cleaners.
I need to pick up from the drycleaners.
I need to shower and get ready.
I need to pack up my bag, likeall the little things, and then
(29:18):
calendar those out.
And what's really strange to meis how much that reduces my
anxiety around something becauseI think it helps our brains
understand okay, this can getdone.
I see how it can get done and itdoes not all need to get done
right now.
Just like approach this step bystep, and that really helps me
(29:40):
when I'm feeling overwhelmed?
Michelle Gauthier (29:42):
Okay, okay, that's great.
So, essentially, sleep, don'tdrink.
And then plan it on yourcalendar.
Okay, perfect, I love it.
And then second and this mightbe real obvious based on what we
just talked about but what'ssomething you do to save
yourself time or effort?
Kelly Nolan (29:59):
Well, I'll skip the obvious stuff of you know what
I love and I will say that onething I do is I do work from
home.
And one thing I shifted a whileago now I can't even remember
is I do not clean the house whenI'm at home.
I will do things like laundry,like you know, getting the big
things moving through the system, but the kitchen's a mess.
My office is kind of a mess.
(30:20):
I don't really deal with thecleaning until my kids are home
and then I try and cleaneverything.
My office I might clean becauseI'm like in here and it bothers
me at a certain point, but Ifound that you know you can
spend a lot of time all day longcleaning up your house, for
sure, yes.
And I think just realizingthat's a great activity to do
with my kids are around, I cantalk to them.
They tend to follow me aroundand you know I can like talk to
(30:43):
them then, and we're movingaround versus spending my very
cherished limited child carehours cleaning up.
Michelle Gauthier (30:49):
Yes, yes, so you save yourself time by doing
the thing you're supposed to bedoing during the time that
you've allotted to do it.
Kelly Nolan (30:56):
I love it.
Michelle Gauthier (30:57):
That's great, that's great.
This was so good, Kelly.
Thank you so much.
Before we wrap up, I will putyour website in the show notes,
but I want you to tell us abouta free way that people can work
with you.
Kelly Nolan (31:12):
Well, thank you so much for having me, Michelle.
This was really fun and it wasa joy to have you on my podcast
too, so definitely go check outMichelle's podcast also.
I have a free five-day program.
I call it the Reset and Refresh.
I'll share the link andbasically it's for five days.
You get free five video lessonswith guides to walk you through
some of the pillars of this.
I have a lot of women who gothrough it and that's all they
(31:33):
need and off they are runningand if you want more, it's a
great way to get a taste of whatthe Bright Method is beyond
today's episode.
I do believe that timemanagement is incredibly
personal.
I don't think that everyoneshould be using my method.
It's just if it's a right fitfor you.
I'd love to get to work withyou and it's a great way to
check it out.
So it's at kellynolancom slashrefresh, but again, the link can
(31:55):
be in the show notes.
Michelle Gauthier (31:56):
Yeah, I'll definitely put those on the show
notes so they're easy to find.
And if you are loving thisconversation and this idea, your
podcast is also called theBright Method.
Kelly Nolan (32:07):
Yes, yes, thank you I can listen to.
Michelle Gauthier (32:10):
Yes, so they can listen to your podcast as
well.
And it was funny when I reachedthis random little backstory
but when I reached out to Kellyand pitched for me to be on her
podcast and she said, oh my gosh, I listened to your podcast.
So I feel like we are a verysimilar minds and if you like
the things that I'm talkingabout, you'll like what Kelly's
(32:30):
talking about and vice versabecause we're both trying to
solve the same type of problem,so I really loved collaborating
with you.
It feels great, and now I feellike I have another new friend
that I made from podcastAbsolutely.
Kelly Nolan (32:42):
I love that.
I love that.
More business friends yeahexactly, exactly Okay.
Michelle Gauthier (32:47):
Thank you for being here today.
Thank you for listening to theOverwhelmed Working Woman
podcast.
If you want to learn more aboutmy work, head over to my
website at michellegauthier.
com.
See you next week.
I'm going to clutter up your calendar, but
I'm going to lighten up yourmind.
And to me, that is the muchhigher priority here.
Michelle Gauthier (00:14):
Working Woman the podcast that helps you be
more calm and more productive bydoing less.
I'm your host, Michelle Gauthier, a former overwhelmed working
woman and current life coach.
On this show, we unpack thestress and pressure that today's
working woman experiences andin each episode you'll get a
(00:37):
strategy to bring more calm,ease and relaxation to your life
.
Hi friend, if you've ever feltlike you're drowning in your
to-do list, raising my handright now or falling constantly
behind or just feeling guiltythat you still can't seem to do
it all, this episode is going tobe great for you.
(00:59):
My guest today is Kelly Nolan.
I'm so excited to have her on.
I basically stalked her down totry to get her to come and talk
to you guys, because I lovewhat she's doing.
She is a former patent attorneyand now she is a time
management expert and she's thefounder of something called the
Bright Method, which is apractical, really structured
system designed specifically forus professional women who are
(01:21):
juggling a million things andfeeling stretched too thin.
So when you listen to Kelly'sinterview today, you're going to
hear why your current timemanagement system might be
failing you and how to createone that actually works for your
real life, and how to uncoverand manage the invisible to-do
list that's draining your energy.
It was really interesting inour conversation thinking about
all the things that we do thataren't anywhere on our to-do
(01:45):
list or on our calendar, andthen she's going to teach us,
too, the key to using yourcalendar as a powerful tool for
clarity and confidence andboundary setting.
I'm really excited to have youon today.
I absolutely love what you'redoing and I can't wait to hear
about it, but tell us first howyou got into being a time
(02:06):
management expert from aftergoing to law school and being a
patent lawyer, sure thing.
Kelly Nolan (02:12):
So I basically had been organized most of my life
on the you know, I had my paperplanners did okay, I would say
organized on the time front.
On that front my physicalorganization skills are not up
to snuff, but I had beenorganized and my systems of
paper planners had gotten me farand things were going well.
And then I became an actualattorney and I got really
(02:34):
overwhelmed pretty quickly.
I looked like I had it togetheron the outside, I was hitting
deadlines, all of that, butinside I was way too anxious,
way too stretched thin when Ihad time.
You know, outside of being anactual lawyer I just couldn't
focus on my friends.
I was constantly thinking aboutwork and worrying about things
and just was like this cannot.
(02:54):
And I looked for timemanagement help.
This was probably like 2012, 13,somewhere in there and there
just wasn't much help out there.
Or, candidly, looking back, alot of it was from men who
probably had a lot more supportat home than I did as a single
(03:17):
person as an attorney, and Istruggled for help, couldn't
make anything stick, and thenslowly over time, started
cobbling together what I thoughtof as my own weird little
system for managing my time, andI kept practicing.
I thought that the system I'dcome up with was just helping me
get to where everybody elsealready was.
That's how it felt at the time,and it wasn't until years later
(03:38):
that I realized oh, otherpeople feel like I felt, and so
I started teaching timemanagement, and that's what I do
now.
I teach what now I call theBright Method.
My own weird little system isnow rebranded into something
that sounds cool.
Michelle Gauthier (03:50):
Yes, it does.
I love the name.
I love the name.
Yeah, that is so cool.
Okay, so when you said youteach the Bright Method, how do
you teach it?
Like, if somebody wants tolearn about it, is it a class?
Do they work with youone-on-one?
Kelly Nolan (04:11):
Yep.
So historically, I've run it intwo eight-week programs each
year, usually start of thecalendar year and the start of
the school year.
In this fall, in 2025, I'm goingto be starting to run it more
open so that people can joinwhen it's best for them, because
it is a time-consuming processto learn, which is a little
ironic when you're feelingstrapped on time, and so I want
people to be able to jump inwhen it works for them, and so I
should be still hammering outall the details, but opening it
(04:34):
kind of like at the first ofeach month between September and
probably April, and what it isis I walk people through step by
step, through learning thesystem and kind of like four
chapters and dig into it, andthen we have a couple of weeks
where we run the whole systemout together and happy to go
into it more.
Michelle Gauthier (04:51):
Yes, I definitely want to hear all
about it, because one of the bigpillars that we talk about on
this podcast is time management.
Lots of things that come in tocause overwhelm, but I feel like
being able to efficiently andeffectively manage your time is
a huge portion of what causesoverwhelm.
So I definitely want to ask youabout that.
(05:12):
How did you know that it justwasn't?
You said you had this papersystem that you would use, and
then something happened and thatjust didn't work anymore.
What was that thing like?
Because my clients will talkabout how they've been able to
handle things for a long timeand all of a sudden they're
completely overwhelmed.
Was it a specific thing, or canyou say what it was for you for
(05:35):
?
Kelly Nolan (05:35):
me well taking a step back.
I just I think my belief andit's just my, you know, based on
the clients I work with is thata lot of us have systems that
get us very far and then there'ssome tipping point in life that
happens that life becomes morecomplicated and the systems that
got us far just can't keep up.
For me I was an early bloomer,it was my first real job.
(05:59):
For other people it's becominga manager, becoming an executive
.
It might be switching to adifferent company.
It might be having a first kidmaybe having a second kid.
It can be a lot of differentthings, maybe helping a parent.
There are a lot of tippingpoints where again, life gets
more complicated and suddenlythis system that you always use
(06:19):
to give you clarity no longer ismaking you feel the way you
want to feel inside and givingyou that clarity.
And, at least for past me, Iwas like, well, I've always used
the system, it's always worked,so it must be me when in
reality I think it's just asystem failure, that it can't.
It just can't keep.
Michelle Gauthier (06:35):
Yes, yes, okay.
Yeah, that's very in line withwhat I hear about overwhelm in
general.
Where I've been fine, I've beenan overachiever all my life,
I've managed all these things, Iwill say often, the second baby
is the put it over the edge.
You can't just can't manage allthe things at the same time.
So that makes sense, that yousee that one too Okay.
(06:55):
So tell me about the brightmethod.
I love the name, first of all,and since you were a patent
lawyer, I love that it has alittle TM after it too.
It's official.
Of course you're going to coverdown on that.
So tell me what it is as a timemanagement system and like how
it's different from your basictime management system.
Kelly Nolan (07:20):
Yeah, well, I think it's just really geared towards
helping professional workingwomen, and I think that what
I've realized is, in the past, alot of the systems I had tried
before again were often by men,and it's no knock on men, but
typically, very broadly,generally speaking, men usually
have more support from theirspouse at home than women do,
and double whammy women areoften providing that support, so
(07:41):
there's even more on theirplate, and so really, what I
think it comes down to that's adifferentiator is that it helps
with the mental load that goeswith all the roles and we can
get into that, and it also helpspeople draw boundaries in a
more clear way, but in a waythat works for women.
Like you have to, we have to becomfortable to draw boundaries,
(08:03):
comfortable enough and like knowhow to phrase it, because we
know it comes off differentlywhen women draw boundaries than
men and things like that, and soI like working on that with
women as well, and I find thatwe'll talk about it more.
But like what the bright methodgives you helps you feel more
confident standing in your knowor drawing a boundary, whatever
it might be, because you feellike you have a better sense
(08:24):
that your boundary isobjectively reasonable, given
everything on your plate.
Michelle Gauthier (08:31):
Okay, that makes sense.
Like you can look at it and seeyeah, I'm not just saying I
don't have enough time, I haveeverything, the system and the
way we'll talk about it just iseverything's visual.
Kelly Nolan (09:01):
You can see it.
I can look at my calendar andsee what's on my plate and see
what has to move and push backand be like, no, I have this
other deadline at this time, andit just gives you a lot of
clarity.
That I just was.
I was lacking before.
Michelle Gauthier (09:13):
Yes, absolutely, and I think, at
least in my experience withworking in corporate, a lot of
companies' cultures are builtaround the idea.
I'm assuming law is definitelyin the same thing, where working
a ton, working many hours, thatwhole, well, this has to be
done tomorrow.
I don't know how you're goingto get it done, but it has to be
(09:35):
done tomorrow.
And so the thought of havinglike a fully laid out here's
everything I'm working on,here's how long it's going to
take I mean I just feel calminside thinking about that.
Kelly Nolan (09:45):
I love that.
Michelle Gauthier (09:46):
Yeah, so how do we get there?
I know it's much that we cancover on like a 30 minute
podcast, but just high level.
What is the right method?
Kelly Nolan (09:54):
So basically what it is is, even though I was a
paper planner lover again, Ijust don't think it could keep
up with life, and so I do go allin on a digital calendar.
Just to be really clear, Istill process paper and pen.
I have a legal pad right nextto me still, but when it comes
to actually managing time andunderstanding where time is
going, I do think a digitalcalendar just can't be beat.
(10:15):
So I focus on that.
It's either Outlook, google,apple, some combination of those
, and so we leverage thosesystems with a lot of smart
strategies.
So in chapter one, what we do iswe dig into the invisible
personal to-do list, so kind ofeverything we're managing at
home.
If you really think about, like, especially your mornings and
(10:36):
your evenings, all the thingsthat we do like showering and
getting ready, walking your dog,making meals if you have little
kids, bed and bath times withkids if you have older kids,
homework, like if you don't havekids, all the other things that
we do with our time all ofthose things take up a ton of
mental space, but they also takeup hours of our day and, oh my
(10:56):
gosh, I have to pause for asecond because I've literally
never thought about my taking ashower and getting ready as like
a to do list item, an invisibleto do list item.
Michelle Gauthier (11:06):
But you do have to build that, you know, 45
minutes or whatever, especiallyif I have to dry my hair.
Yeah, takes a while.
Kelly Nolan (11:14):
Yeah, yeah.
And that's what I love aboutthis is it's exactly what you're
saying is we don't tend to putit on our calendar, we don't
tend to tend to put it on a todo list, and yet that and all
those other things I mentionedwe're playing that jigsaw puzzle
in our head here is do all ofthat but then put it in the
(11:40):
calendar.
And what I love about a digitalcalendar is you can repeat
things you know every workday orevery Monday, wednesday, it
looks like this you can repeatthem and then you move them
around Like I'm not like, andthen you live it your life
rigidly, like.
That's not the point.
It's just get all the thingsthat you already are juggling
out of your head and into asystem so you can see them
visually and understand.
Does this even work?
(12:01):
And sometimes you see, oh, I'vebeen trying to do an hour and a
half of things in an hour andthat's why my mornings are tough
.
And I can readjust then, andalso it shows you what's left
over, like what your actualcapacity is to do other things,
and that's really important,because often we're like I have
12 hours to figure out what todo today and in reality, four or
five of those hours are takenup by all the things that we
(12:23):
just talked about, and so it's agood reality check on what is
your actual capacity.
So that's where we start.
When is your energy great?
How do you want to match makethat?
What are your high energythings?
How do you plan you know?
(12:44):
How much email do you deal withevery day?
How are we going to protect atleast some time for that?
It doesn't have to be.
You know, email is a good nookand cranny activity, but it also
.
If you have five hours of emailevery day, you should probably
block at least three hours onyour calendar for it, Things
like that.
Chapter three is really when weget into more of the one-off
to-do list stuff.
That's where a lot of peoplelike to start with time blocking
, and I think that's often a bigmistake and an understandable
(13:05):
one.
That people make is they hearabout time blocking and putting
things in your calendar andyou're like, cool, I'm going to
start doing that.
But again, if you are lookingat 12 hours of free time, you
time block that beautifully.
Michelle Gauthier (13:14):
forget all the invisible stuff then you
don't have a realistic game planand then you think the plan
doesn't work.
Yes, when really it's justyou're not considering
everything.
Ok, that makes a lot of sense.
Kelly Nolan (13:25):
Yeah, you either blame yourself or you blame time
blocking without realizing.
You know it's a totallyunderstandable mistake to make,
but that can help.
A lot is starting where westart.
And then the last component isthere are a couple of planning
sessions I recommend likeannually and things like that,
but the big one is a weeklyplanning session that I love to
hold on Fridays, maybe Thursdaysif Fridays are tough for you,
(13:46):
if your energy is too low.
Michelle Gauthier (13:49):
And what do you do on Friday?
Kelly Nolan (13:51):
So I am a big proponent of really being clear
about what you're trying toaccomplish and when we talk
about what I think a successfulplanning session looks like, it
can be about two hours.
I like to be really realisticabout planning and time
management in general and so inthat planning session, high
level overview is.
(14:13):
Step one is gather all theaction items that have come at
you, flown at you over the weekfrom all the different places
and that can look different forpeople.
That can look differently.
You know if you're in Slack orTeams or email or your head, or
just even looking at yourproject overview, I teach a
bird's eye view of like what areall the things on your plate?
Michelle Gauthier (14:33):
Think about all of those.
Kelly Nolan (14:34):
But it also can be your natural tendencies.
Like I, if I'm on the go, I useApple reminders just to capture
to-dos, and so one of my lineitems during that week is to go
look at my reminders and pullout all of the to-dos and then
bridge them to the calendar,make sure you kind of have
(15:00):
captured everything you need todo and roughly throw it in the
calendar when you think it'sgoing to happen, when you think
you need to do.
It can be next week, be threeweeks from now, could be three
months from now.
And then step two is kind ofsmoothing out the next two weeks
.
I like planning two weeks at atime.
I just think it's reallyhelpful to have a little bit of
a broader view than just a week,and that can be smoothing
things out.
You, you know, pushing thingsout, prioritizing within the
calendar, that kind of stuff.
(15:20):
It can also be looking at childcare planning, you know, just
making sure you have extra childcare where you need it, extra
pet care, things like that Okay.
Michelle Gauthier (15:29):
Okay, that makes sense.
I like the concept.
I've never thought about doingtwo weeks out until I started
listening to your podcast, and Ithink it's a really interesting
concept, because then you kindof have already done a once over
on the week you're on and thenyou're doing the long view on
the second week, so that justsort of once you get into that
rhythm, I bet that feels reallygood, where you can kind of fine
(15:50):
tune the week that's coming upand you're not starting from
scratch.
Kelly Nolan (15:53):
Yeah, and I think that there are some things that
we see, and I should say, evenfarther than two weeks out, that
you're like oh man, I got tostart working on that now you
don't want to just see somethingand I will say that's a line
item and kind of that.
Step one is you don'tnecessarily have to back out and
plan out how you're going toaccomplish all your projects in
like, let's say, the next threemonths during a planning session
(16:16):
.
But pretend you're a lawyer.
When I was a litigator you knowthere's some deadlines that you
just want to scan the nextthree months and make sure that
type of deadline's not on there,because if you have like a
motion for summary judgment.
You need to know that threemonths in advance and maybe more
.
And so you?
That's the type of stuff thatyou don't.
Again, you don't have to likeevery deadline you see in the
next three months, figure outhow you're going to accomplish
(16:43):
it, but you want to see thosebig ones and you want to be kind
of consistently looking at thehorizon for those two.
Michelle Gauthier (16:45):
Okay, okay, that makes sense.
And what are some of the thingsthat the women who are in your
group and learning your methods?
What are some of the thingsthat they object to or struggle
with in terms of getting all oftheir time on paper?
Like, do they say I can't dothis, or it takes too much time
to plan it, or it's toostructured, like, what are some
(17:05):
of the objections that someonemight have if they're going from
paper planning or very looseplanning to this method?
That's much more strategic andspecific.
Kelly Nolan (17:16):
Yep, I would say the biggest initial one is this
looks really overwhelming.
There is a lot in there, and Ido teach tech strategies to help
it not be quite so overwhelming, but it is.
I mean, we are putting a lotmore in your calendar than you
probably have traditionally doneand I think that people are
(17:40):
suddenly like I don't, this isover.
I don't like it, and what Iencourage people to do is think
this is just reflecting whatyou're already doing with your
time.
You're just now having to seeit and confront it, but it's
already what you were doing withyour time Again before.
You might've just held all ofthe things you're seeing in your
head, where now we're justgetting it out of your head and
(18:03):
into a calendar that we can playwith and we can be flexible
with it.
We don't have to live with thisrigidly, but now we get to play
with it outside of our brains,and what I really think about it
is.
The other thing I would say,too, is often the calendar looks
and feels overwhelming to readthrough, because it's a great
(18:24):
red flag that you are trying todo too much.
To me, there's such a simpleelegance of a digital calendar
that there's only so much space.
There are only so many blocksof things that are going to fit
in there.
Much space, there are only somany blocks of things that are
going to fit in there.
And if it is overwhelming andyou're tightening things up to
try and fit it in and all thatkind of stuff, that's just a red
flag for you that you're tryingto do an objectively
(18:47):
unrealistic amount of things.
And that can be hard.
I'm not saying that.
I mean there's a lot offrustration in that, but I
really encourage people to runtowards that front end
frustration because it will saveyou day to day living from
stress if you are planning morerealistically.
Michelle Gauthier (19:04):
Yes, I feel like your point I love.
I just want to repeat, becauseit was so good is that your
digital calendar might look morecluttered than you're used to
seeing, but your brain feels somuch more clear and you and I
both know from working withwomen who feel overwhelmed that
when your brain is clear you canmake actual progress on things.
(19:24):
When your brain is cluttered,you can't even decide what to
start on because you're just inthat space of overwhelm.
This is just reminding me ofwhen I first got divorced and I
was trying to figure out havingmy own business, being a single
mom and the finances of that.
I had to go and start checkingall my bank transactions every
(19:45):
day and it's one of those thingsyou want to look at for the
listener I'm covering my eye andkind of looking away like.
I don't even want to see howmany times I went to Starbucks
last week and I came from aprevious life where I wouldn't
have even thought about that orworried about that.
So it did kind of give me like astress response to see them.
But the more that I looked atthem yeah, and just like you
(20:08):
said, it's a quick red flag Ifyou're spending more than you're
actually bringing in you'relike, oh OK, I'm overspent on
this.
And it's very similar to whatyou're talking about with the
calendar.
And now when I don't look at thetransactions I feel anxious,
like I want to see them all comein so I can be like yeah, I
know that one, I chose to spendthat one, so it feels completely
(20:28):
different.
So I like that.
It's kind of like getting usedto the idea of seeing all these
things outside of your brain,when we're used to carrying them
around in our brain Absolutely.
Yeah, that's awesome.
So you work, are basicallyworking all the time with women
who feel stretched too thin whenthey realize they can't do it
(20:50):
all or that they're there haveway more things on their to do
list than they can actually do.
If they feel bad about that orguilty about that, how do you
advise them?
What should they do?
Yeah, got more than they canactually handle.
Kelly Nolan (21:05):
Well, they're kind of two big different approaches,
based on personal andprofessional, because obviously
in some we have more controlthan the other.
Sometimes, on the personal sideof things, I do feel like a lot
of us put a lot of pressure onourselves on the personal front,
whether it's goal setting orhouse projects or whatever it is
, and there can be a real, youknow, confrontation moment with
(21:28):
yourself on the expectationsthat we're putting on ourselves.
Let's say you've come to therealization that you can't do it
all, but now you're like.
But now what do I do?
There are a couple of differentapproaches.
One, I think, is having a greatlike, having a place.
I think of this as my bird'seye view.
That I was mentioning is kindof like the overview in my
business or your professionallife, and then the overview in
(21:50):
your personal life, like the bigbuckets of things, not all the
little big buckets In mybusiness.
It's also like you know themain projects I'm working on at
a time, maybe the products I'mselling and your career.
(22:12):
It might be like your owncareer goals those like kind of
big bucket type things and thenalso all of your active projects
and maybe some of your likeback burner type projects.
And speaking of the back burnerthing on your personal life and
your business life, I think it'sreally helpful to have some
sort of back burner column thatyou can park things that you're
not going to do right now.
(22:33):
Or an alternative is you justkeep a list of some somewhere
that, let's say, you have a lotof house projects you want to do
.
You have like a house projectapple note in that planning
session.
What you do is remind yourselfto go, look at those places and
evaluate.
Do I want to do one of thesethings now?
And I find that just havingsomewhere I can park those
(22:54):
things that I'm kind of comingto terms, that I can't do right
now, having somewhere to parkthem and know I'll revisit them
each week or each month, reallyhelps me.
Let them go and take thepressure off of.
I think sometimes we kind oflike think about things or feel
like we have to do them becausewe're afraid we're going to
forget if we don't.
Michelle Gauthier (23:10):
And as long as you can kind of park,
something that's good.
Kelly Nolan (23:13):
I kind of went off on a tangent there, going to
like, let's say, I have too muchto do.
That's.
One option is to kind of lookat all the things, brain dump
them, if you want to, and pullout anything that can wait.
Put them on one of those backburner columns or those lists or
(23:34):
calendar out six months fromnow, consider doing this, and
just then get it off your braindump to-do list type thing and
just start calling out what canI punt out, what can I really
punt out.
Then move for the more shorterterm things and then the medium
ground.
That's really good on thepersonal front, where we a
little bit have some morecontrol over what we do In the
professional life.
That can be obviously harderand what I really recommend
(23:55):
doing this is harder than itsounds, but I also think it's
doable is what is the topdepartment organization,
whatever you want to think about, what is the top goal we're
working towards right now andwhich of these projects support
that and which ones don't andcould be punted out.
And if you have the autonomy tomake some of those calls and
(24:16):
say, actually we're going toprioritize these three things,
and part of prioritizing ismaking sure we have the time and
energy as a team to do them,and that requires eliminating
other things.
Then you can make those toughcalls.
I find having the clarity ofwhat's the one goal we're
working on right now to reallyhelp with that.
If you can't make those calls,though, that helps you go into a
(24:36):
conversation with the data atyour fingertips in that way and
say, hey, from where I'm sittingright now, this is the top goal
.
Given that, I think these arethe projects we should
prioritize.
I do not think we canaccomplish these other things
and those three things and Iwant to make sure we get those
top three priorities projectsdone, even if you're wrong on
(24:56):
what the top goal is.
That conversation just exhibitssuch leadership to me and
strategic thinking, versus justgoing in and being like I am
overwhelmed.
Yeah.
Michelle Gauthier (25:05):
I can't do all of this.
Kelly Nolan (25:11):
Yeah, but I feel about this approach is you're
demonstrating leadership, whichI think often we shy away from
these conversations becausewe're afraid we'll come off as
weak.
Michelle Gauthier (25:14):
where this, I think you can come off as
strong, even if you're wrongagain on what the top priority
is yes, exactly If I'm thinkingabout a former employee coming
to me and saying these are allthe things I'm working on.
I think these are the top threepriorities.
I can't get to these other two.
I'd be so delighted, instead ofjust saying I don't know what
to do.
I'm overwhelmed.
You know that really shows likeinitiative and leadership.
Kelly Nolan (25:36):
Yeah, I think the final great part of that too is
hopefully you're getting to thenkeep and move forward with
projects you're also reallyenjoying.
And I think that part of thebeauty of coming up with
solutions in these things ishopefully the solution you want
that they then pick up on andrun with.
And I will say just to berealistic, I've had clients
where a lot of theseconversations have gone really
(25:57):
well.
Often, I think, bosses have noidea what's fully on your plate
and had no idea that you were inso many meetings that you want
to eliminate some meetings orhave so many projects they don't
know, and so there are a lot ofgreat bosses out there who I've
been pleasantly delighted havebeen, have had great responses,
and then there's some thathaven't, and I've had that in my
own life and to me, boundariesin the way that we're talking
(26:20):
about essentially still workeven when they don't, because
they show you the person's truecolors, and that is really good
data for you to know.
Moving forward Doesn't mean youhave to leave the job right
away, but I do think it helpsinform how much of our life are
we willing to sacrifice for thisjob that's not willing to show
up for us in that way?
(26:40):
So, yeah, it's still reallygood data too.
Michelle Gauthier (26:42):
Yes, interesting information, yes,
yes, okay, great.
I love this whole method andconcept and I think that once
you have the faith in yourcalendar and you believe that if
something's on your calendar itwill get done, it feels great
to put like I just kickedsomething out to June and I'm
not going to give it any thoughtuntil I get there.
And when I get to June I'mgoing to be surprised.
(27:04):
I'll be like, oh yeah, that'sgreat, I forgot about this.
Yeah, I feel I can rest assuredthat I don't have to think
about it because I know I havethis system and that's how I
work it.
And when I get there I'llevaluate Is it June or is it
going to go to August, or isthis the month that I work on it
?
So even if you are listeningand thinking, oh my gosh, that
sounds so overwhelming, it feelslike one of those things that
(27:27):
might be surge overwhelming,like it might be overwhelming at
first, but once you get it andyou have the system, you can
feel so much calmer.
Kelly Nolan (27:35):
Yeah, I completely agree.
I love it.
I love your point on that.
You'll get to June and be like,oh yeah, because like that in
and of itself is valuable,because then your energy about
it is fresh, in and of itself isvaluable, because then your
energy about it is fresh,there's excitement versus if you
are staring this down on yourto-do list for until June and
you're going to be like alreadysick of it and tired of it
exactly I hate there's a realdifference.
Michelle Gauthier (27:57):
I only like on my calendar what I'm going to
actually do that week, yeah.
Kelly Nolan (28:02):
I think that's great, yes.
Michelle Gauthier (28:03):
Yes, Okay, great.
Well, I want to ask you the twoquestions that I ask every
guest.
The first one is what issomething that you do when you
feel overwhelmed to makeyourself feel better?
Kelly Nolan (28:16):
Well, candidly, my first reaction is to protect
energy as best I can.
So, as lame as it sounds,prioritizing sleep and,
unfortunately, cutting outalcohol, I have found to be
really good.
Like, everything's better whenyou have energy, so when you're
overwhelmed more energy is notgoing to hurt.
So that's really valuable On thetime management front, I would
(28:36):
say, is really identifyingwhat's stressing me out, what's
the real issue or issuesstressing me out, and then
thinking about how can I use mycalendar to help me see how this
can get done.
So if there was a work meetingthat is causing a lot of
overwhelm and anxiety, it'sreally just sitting down with a
paper and pen and being likewhat are all the things I have
(28:58):
to do to make this meeting asuccess?
I got to draft the slides.
I might have to edit the slides.
I might need to get data fromsomeone.
I need to polish it.
I'm going to want to practicethe presentation, probably twice
.
I need to figure out what I'mgoing to wear.
I'm going to need to go to thedry cleaners.
I need to pick up from the drycleaners.
I need to shower and get ready.
I need to pack up my bag, likeall the little things, and then
(29:18):
calendar those out.
And what's really strange to meis how much that reduces my
anxiety around something becauseI think it helps our brains
understand okay, this can getdone.
I see how it can get done and itdoes not all need to get done
right now.
Just like approach this step bystep, and that really helps me
(29:40):
when I'm feeling overwhelmed?
Michelle Gauthier (29:42):
Okay, okay, that's great.
So, essentially, sleep, don'tdrink.
And then plan it on yourcalendar.
Okay, perfect, I love it.
And then second and this mightbe real obvious based on what we
just talked about but what'ssomething you do to save
yourself time or effort?
Kelly Nolan (29:59):
Well, I'll skip the obvious stuff of you know what
I love and I will say that onething I do is I do work from
home.
And one thing I shifted a whileago now I can't even remember
is I do not clean the house whenI'm at home.
I will do things like laundry,like you know, getting the big
things moving through the system, but the kitchen's a mess.
My office is kind of a mess.
(30:20):
I don't really deal with thecleaning until my kids are home
and then I try and cleaneverything.
My office I might clean becauseI'm like in here and it bothers
me at a certain point, but Ifound that you know you can
spend a lot of time all day longcleaning up your house, for
sure, yes.
And I think just realizingthat's a great activity to do
with my kids are around, I cantalk to them.
They tend to follow me aroundand you know I can like talk to
(30:43):
them then, and we're movingaround versus spending my very
cherished limited child carehours cleaning up.
Michelle Gauthier (30:49):
Yes, yes, so you save yourself time by doing
the thing you're supposed to bedoing during the time that
you've allotted to do it.
Kelly Nolan (30:56):
I love it.
Michelle Gauthier (30:57):
That's great, that's great.
This was so good, Kelly.
Thank you so much.
Before we wrap up, I will putyour website in the show notes,
but I want you to tell us abouta free way that people can work
with you.
Kelly Nolan (31:12):
Well, thank you so much for having me, Michelle.
This was really fun and it wasa joy to have you on my podcast
too, so definitely go check outMichelle's podcast also.
I have a free five-day program.
I call it the Reset and Refresh.
I'll share the link andbasically it's for five days.
You get free five video lessonswith guides to walk you through
some of the pillars of this.
I have a lot of women who gothrough it and that's all they
(31:33):
need and off they are runningand if you want more, it's a
great way to get a taste of whatthe Bright Method is beyond
today's episode.
I do believe that timemanagement is incredibly
personal.
I don't think that everyoneshould be using my method.
It's just if it's a right fitfor you.
I'd love to get to work withyou and it's a great way to
check it out.
So it's at kellynolancom slashrefresh, but again, the link can
(31:55):
be in the show notes.
Michelle Gauthier (31:56):
Yeah, I'll definitely put those on the show
notes so they're easy to find.
And if you are loving thisconversation and this idea, your
podcast is also called theBright Method.
Kelly Nolan (32:07):
Yes, yes, thank you I can listen to.
Michelle Gauthier (32:10):
Yes, so they can listen to your podcast as
well.
And it was funny when I reachedthis random little backstory
but when I reached out to Kellyand pitched for me to be on her
podcast and she said, oh my gosh, I listened to your podcast.
So I feel like we are a verysimilar minds and if you like
the things that I'm talkingabout, you'll like what Kelly's
(32:30):
talking about and vice versabecause we're both trying to
solve the same type of problem,so I really loved collaborating
with you.
It feels great, and now I feellike I have another new friend
that I made from podcastAbsolutely.
Kelly Nolan (32:42):
I love that.
I love that.
More business friends yeahexactly, exactly Okay.
Michelle Gauthier (32:47):
Thank you for being here today.
Thank you for listening to theOverwhelmed Working Woman
podcast.
If you want to learn more aboutmy work, head over to my
website at michellegauthier.
com.
See you next week.
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