#151| Why Doing More Keeps You Stuck in Overwhelm & What To Do Instead: Overwhelm, Productivity, Time Management & People Pleasing

Does it ever feel like even your downtime needs to be productive?

If you catch yourself checking emails while watching TV or listening to podcasts during every errand, you're not alone. This episode dives into why constant multitasking might be increasing your overwhelm — not helping it — and how reclaiming just five minutes of stillness a day can change everything.

In this episode, you'll learn: 

• Why productivity doesn't come from doing more — and what actually restores your energy
• Two key reasons your brain resists slowing down (and how to work through them)
• Simple ways to create pockets of calm without guilt or discomfort

Press play and discover why stillness might be your secret weapon against burnout.

Wondering why you're overwhelmed? Take my "why am I overwhelmed" quiz to find out the source of your overwhelm, and what to do about it.

Send Me a Message - Have a question, comment, or just want to say hi? Message me here, I'd love to chat!

Work With Me - Interested in working with me 1-on-1, taking a class, or joining one of my coaching groups? Message me here to get the scoop.

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Life can be overwhelming, but on this podcast, you'll discover practical strategies to overcome overwhelm, imposter syndrome, and negative self-talk, manage time effectively, set boundaries, and stay productive in high-stress jobs—all while learning how to say no and prioritize self-care on the Overwhelmed Worki...

Episode Transcript

Speaker 1 (00:00):
Just even a tiny pocket of stillness will really
give you much more energy forthe rest of your day.
You're listening to OverwhelmedWorking Woman, the podcast that
helps you be more calm and moreproductive by doing less.
I'm your host, michelle Gothier, a former Overwhelmed Working

(00:21):
Woman and current life coach.
On this show, we unpack thestress and pressure that today's
working woman experiences, andin each episode you'll get a
strategy to bring more calm,ease and relaxation to your life
.
Hi, friend, thanks for joiningtoday.

(00:42):
Last week, I was coaching one ofmy coaching groups.
There's a group that I sell atthe beginning of the year, where
you can meet with me once amonth throughout the whole year
to make sure that you're ontrack with your goals and see
what's going well and what's notgoing well, and then I coach
everybody to try to get them upand ready for the next month.
It's a really fun group andeveryone is making lots of

(01:04):
progress, but last week, when wewere meeting, we found that
there was this theme among allof us, and so I wanted to share
that with you in case you'refeeling the same thing.
So what we're going to talkabout today is why constantly
doing something, multitaskingand basically making progress at
all moments of the day isprobably increasing your

(01:24):
overwhelm instead of decreasingit.
Sometimes we feel like workingmore is going to solve our
overwhelm, but it doesn't.
And then two big reasons why westruggle to do less what
happens in our brain when we doless and consider ourselves to
be quote unquote lazy orunproductive?
And then I'll give you a coupleeasy ways to practice stillness
and give you a little challengefor the week ahead.

(01:46):
So that's what we're going tocover today.
Like I mentioned last week inour group coaching session, we
were talking about the month andreviewing the month and what
didn't go well and what a lot ofpeople noticed was that they
were just busy doing things allthe time, even when it wasn't
actually necessary.
So some examples of that wouldbe even when I'm doing my dishes

(02:07):
, I feel like I need to belistening to a self-help book.
Or even when I'm relaxing quoteunquote and watching TV, I'm
checking my work emails or doingsomething else on my phone,
because just watching TV isn'tenough or isn't enough
productivity.
Or when I'm exercising orwalking or driving, I always

(02:29):
need to have like a secondactivity going.
So maybe listening to a podcastor listening to an audio book
or calling your sister orwhatever it is, and what we
found in talking about that is,when you do that, you really
never get a break, and obviouslythat makes sense Intellectually
speaking.
You're thinking, yeah, thatmakes sense.

(02:50):
If I'm never just doing onething or just doing nothing like
, let's just say, I'm drivingand I'm only driving and I'm not
listening to anything and I'mjust allowing whatever thoughts
come, you can see how that couldbe much more relaxing.
But there are a couple thingsthat keep people, that prevent
people from doing that, andthose two things are number one

(03:12):
we tie our enoughness to ourproductivity.
So what that means is I havethis subconscious belief in my
mind that I am only worthy orenough based on how much I
produce or do.
So therefore, it makes sensethat if you ever feel like
you're not doing somethingproductive or making progress in

(03:32):
some way, that your brain willsend you the message of you're
not enough.
You have to do more than this.
You can't just be.
That's not allowed.
I just want to remind you thatyour worth actually isn't
something that you earn by doingthings.
You're already enough, and yourworthiness and your enoughness
in the world come from just youbeing, not from you doing.

(03:55):
And it makes sense that we'resort of raised to believe that
to be productive is to be good.
You want to do that, butremember just to gently check
yourself and say oh wait, am Idoing that thing unconsciously?
Am I choosing to just runmyself ragged because I believe
in order to be enough, I have tobe producing?

(04:15):
And then the other reason whypeople don't want to do this.
So, for example, the other dayI was feeling overwhelmed
because I had just been back toback to back in clients and
meetings and then I had to gosomewhere in my car and I
realized I just need silence.
So I just drove in my car incomplete silence and I was
actually going to my daughter'shorse barn, which is kind of
like out on some country typeroads, and I noticed how

(04:38):
beautiful it was and by the timeI got there I felt completely
calm, versus if I would havecalled someone on the phone or
listened to a book or donesomething else to distract me
from that.
So the reason why people don'tdo that.
So just think about yourselfright now.
Think about the idea of justdriving in complete silence.
What often comes up for peopleis.

(04:59):
I need a distraction frommyself.
I don't want to be alone.
I'm afraid of what thoughtsmight come up or what feelings
might come up if I'm alone,because when we sit, still, this
is kind of like if you're inthe shower or something, unless
you bring your phone in theshower, which I hope you don't
but when we're in the shower andit's just quiet, all these

(05:21):
thoughts come up.
I have lots of great ideas inthe shower, for example, but
that's because my brain isn'tdistracted by anything else.
I'm just standing there and I'mthinking.
But people are afraid to do thatbecause they don't want to feel
sadness or anxiety or stress,and, yes, that can be
uncomfortable, depending on whatthat feeling is.
But I'm here to tell youbecause I tried really hard to

(05:42):
kind of outrun those feelings,but they just keep coming back.
Those feelings are there,they're just waiting for you.
So you might as well give thema listen now versus pushing them
off for another couple of years.
I truly believe that our braintries to give us messages and if
it doesn't work, then our bodywill give them to us.
Like, for example, I alwayshave lower back pain when I'm

(06:05):
feeling stressed.
My body has a little indicatorto tell me, hey, something's not
right.
Better take a look at that.
And so if you think about thatand you're afraid to do nothing
because you're afraid of whatcan come up, it can guide you
through exactly how to feelthose emotions in a way that
still feels safe, even though itcan feel a little scary to be
alone with our own feelings.

(06:25):
In fact, next Thursday'sepisode is going to be about
that exact topic.
So how to use this method that Icall near, to be near your
feelings, to allow yourself toprocess them and feel them, and
not be afraid of what thosefeelings are.
Personally, I used to thinksadness was the very worst thing
that could happen to me, andnow I know on the other side of

(06:46):
sadness there is true joy.
Okay, so back to doing amillion things all the time.
We know that when we do singletasking or when we sit in
silence, for example, like afive minute meditation, there is
science to support the ideathat we are then restored and
can be much more productive thanif we're just constantly doing

(07:08):
things.
Just even a tiny pocket ofstillness will really give you
much more energy for the rest ofyour day.
So here's my challenge for youthis week.
I challenge you to sit insilence in one way or another,
for five minutes sometime thisweek.
Here are some examples.
Number one you could just sitstill and meditate, or lie down

(07:31):
and meditate for five minutesand just be with your own
thoughts.
People usually hate that idea,so if that sounds like
impossible to you, then Ichallenge you to do a task in
your home without any otherdistractions.
So cook dinner or do the dishesor fold a load of laundry just

(07:53):
doing that, only that one thing.
Or do what I did and just drivefor five minutes with no radio
no, nothing on, and see how youfeel after, notice, if you feel
less overwhelmed than you didbefore you did that task.
I also want to remind you of acouple things.
You don't have to earn yourenoughness.

(08:15):
You're already enough that youcan stop and rest without
feeling guilty.
And that if that silence feelshard, because you're already
enough that you can stop andrest without feeling guilty, and
that if that silence feels hardbecause you're afraid of your
own feelings or you're afraid ofyour own thoughts a it's
probably not as scary as youthink.
And B next Thursday I'm goingto teach you exactly what to do
with those feelings, and thatwill be episode number 153.

(08:40):
If you've gotten something outof this podcast today and maybe
you have a friend who is anoverdoer like you and you want
to send her this podcast, thatwould be amazing.
If you've gotten value out oftoday's episode, or any episode
in this podcast, I would be sograteful if you would leave me a
rating and review.
It really helps the podcast getshown to many other overwhelmed

(09:01):
working women so that we canachieve our goal of no woman
left behind.
We all feel less stress andless overwhelmed.
Have a great week.
See you soon.
Thank you for listening to theOverwhelmed Working Woman
podcast.
If you want to learn more aboutmy work, head over to my

(09:24):
website at michellegothiercom.
See you next week.