Jerry welcomes Dalton and Melina for a candid, funny, and sometimes raw conversation about what many lesbians navigate day-to-day. From being ignored at gay bars and dress-code gatekeeping to why some lesbians feel safer in “straight” spaces, Melina shares lived realities that don’t get talked about enough. The trio also gets practical about relationships—hyphenated names, beneficiaries, insurance, and handling a mutual split with compassion. They touch on Roe’s reversal, pregnancy-test basics, and debunking sexual-health myths (PSA: don’t use food as lube). It’s an episode about respect, safety, and growing up without growing hard.
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Episode Transcript
Available transcripts are automatically generated. Complete accuracy is not guaranteed.
UNKNOWN (00:01):
Thank you.
SPEAKER_02 (00:53):
Hello and welcome to the Pink Bunny Podcast and I'm
your host Jerry Williams andtoday we've got a couple guests
that are going to join me today.
I have my husband Dalton.
Hi.
And we also have Melina here.
SPEAKER_00 (01:07):
Howdy howdy.
SPEAKER_02 (01:08):
So I invited them today because there's a few
things that I think from awoman's perspective, I think
are, is helpful to a lot ofpeople because my experiences,
Dalton's experiences are waydifferent than your experiences,
especially when it comes to, youknow, being in the LGBTQ
(01:30):
community and dealing with thepublic.
You know, there are certainthings that I think as men, we
get a lot of, you know, take alot of shit for.
And it's different from women, Ithink.
Well, I mean, especially lesbian
SPEAKER_00 (01:44):
women, you know.
I do agree in a lot of thosedifferent aspects.
When it comes to...
I do agree in that, 100%.
And when it comes to a lot oflesbians, it's a back and forth.
The reason why I say that isbecause we don't really get a
whole lot from straight people.
We get actually more from gays.
SPEAKER_02 (02:04):
Meaning?
SPEAKER_00 (02:05):
Meaning...
I will have more of aconfrontation when it comes to
gay men than I would with anystraight person.
And that's why a lot of lesbianstend to go to straight bars
because all straight men want todo is convert them back.
SPEAKER_02 (02:22):
Yeah, like they can.
SPEAKER_00 (02:23):
Exactly.
They can't.
But that is a huge issue.
And compared to if I was to goto a gay bar, it's more along
the lines of like, ugh.
lesbians.
SPEAKER_02 (02:34):
Oh, you're
SPEAKER_00 (02:35):
in my territory.
Yeah, and a lot of times it goesto, like, I'll go to a bar and
I'll try to get a drink and Iwill be the last one taken care
of.
No way! And I would be the firstone at the bar.
Are you serious?
All the time.
It's happened for, I mean, I'vebeen gay for about, shoot, a
very long time.
Wow.
(02:56):
Correct, since I was born.
And yeah, so that's been a hugething and it's really fun For me
to actually go out of my way andbring random people because
they're like, no, you're cool,you're amazing, you're this.
And I'm like, watch.
And I will literally go to a gaybar, especially in San Antonio
or Austin or anything like that,and I'll go and there'll be 15,
(03:18):
20 gay men, all amazing,beautiful human beings.
SPEAKER_02 (03:23):
Not all of
SPEAKER_00 (03:25):
them.
I mean...
I'm trying to be nice.
But then I'll sit there and thenI'll be the last one taken care
of.
SPEAKER_02 (03:34):
Oh, that really sucks.
SPEAKER_00 (03:35):
It's a very interesting thing to think
about.
Yeah.
And you only really deal with itas being a lesbian.
SPEAKER_02 (03:42):
Oh, that's...
I'm really disappointed to hearthat, honestly.
I did not know that.
SPEAKER_00 (03:47):
Yeah, that's why most lesbians, like, they'll go
to the gay bars every now andthen, but for the most part,
they'll go to a random straightbar because...
They'll get taken care of.
SPEAKER_02 (03:57):
Wow.
You know, I'm old.
I'm going to be 62 this year.
But I remember when, and I'vetold Dalton this before, you
know, when I was coming out andgoing out, I don't go obviously
as much as I used to, but besidethe point, I remember when in
certain leather bars, women werenot allowed at all.
(04:18):
At all.
And if they were to try to getin, they would...
come up with some ridiculousthing like, oh, you're wearing
open-toed shoes.
Oh, you have cologne on orperfume or whatever.
It would be some reason to tell,to exclude you.
SPEAKER_00 (04:37):
You don't have a handkerchief in the back of your
pocket.
SPEAKER_02 (04:39):
Anything.
Yeah, exactly.
I mean, that still happens.
Like, we were just looking upthat thing in Vegas, right?
The other day, like, that BarbDries or whatever the hell it's
called, and they're saying,like, you can't wear jeans.
Oh, well, that's a dress code.
But I'm just saying, at the sametime, they can find a way to not
let you in because they'reostracizing you because they
(04:59):
think you're ugly or whateveryou're gay you're a lesbian
you're you know
SPEAKER_00 (05:04):
but when you really think about it like that happens
everywhere like just another ithink two weeks ago i went to a
bar and they did not let me inwhat yeah it's because i had a i
had my crow like my neck tattoo
SPEAKER_02 (05:18):
and
SPEAKER_00 (05:19):
and they literally went sorry
SPEAKER_02 (05:20):
Oh, you're a threat.
Yeah.
SPEAKER_00 (05:22):
Or who knows?
I'm a threat.
And I was like, that's body art.
Like, I'm not.
Was it a bar
SPEAKER_02 (05:27):
bar or like a restaurant bar?
SPEAKER_00 (05:28):
It was a bar bar.
It was, what is that one bar?
Downtown, I think it's SanAntonio.
Anyway, we don't have the nameon it.
It doesn't really matter.
Yeah.
SPEAKER_02 (05:39):
Because they didn't let you in, so why name them?
Disappointing.
SPEAKER_00 (05:43):
Exactly.
They deserve all the people.
Hey.
Because I used to go there allthe time.
It was an amazing place.
But, yeah, so they wouldn't letme in.
And I was like, oh, that'sweird.
But that is also a normal thing.
And that's why we just talkedabout, like, that's dress code.
Yeah.
It happens all the time.
SPEAKER_02 (06:02):
Well, when you and your, I'm going to say your
wife, even though I know thatthings are changing for you.
She
SPEAKER_00 (06:10):
is, yes, you're my wife.
SPEAKER_02 (06:12):
When you guys would go out, did you also experience
that same thing as a couple?
SPEAKER_00 (06:21):
Or did people even know?
It was really funny becausewe've been married for a long
time.
And in the beginning, it wasvery funny because I would say,
hey, these are things that I'vedealt with.
Because she wasn't
SPEAKER_02 (06:35):
as...
SPEAKER_00 (06:37):
She was experienced, but she wasn't as experienced as
I am.
Okay.
And so when we finally went outto the gay bars or whatever, I
went, hey, watch this.
And she went, what?
And I was like, I'm going to bethe last one to be taken care
of.
And it literally happened.
And then she sat there and shelooked at me and she went, are
(06:58):
you serious?
SPEAKER_02 (06:59):
Did that really happen?
SPEAKER_00 (07:01):
Did that really just happen because you've been in
the industry for so long?
You're going to get tipped well.
But you are willing to look at aperson and be like, lesbian, I
don't want to take care of youjust because I'm at the gay bars
and just because you're a gayguy.
And I love gay men.
Clearly, I'm on this podcast.
SPEAKER_02 (07:20):
I mean, I think it's because Caitlin hasn't
experienced it because...
Well, she did because she waswith her.
Well, she experienced it, butshe hasn't experienced it
because she's more not of thelooking like a lesbian.
Do you know what I mean?
More feminine, so to speak, inher looks.
Not...
anything other than that but Ifeel like she hasn't experienced
(07:40):
it before because like they'rejust like oh another little
queen here on her bacheloretteparty get her drinks so she can
go back
SPEAKER_00 (07:47):
on the dance floor so you're probably saying like
okay she's just a straight womandoing whatever she wants exactly
when she's with me it's adifferent type of not to be
SPEAKER_02 (07:57):
this may come across rude so correct me if I'm wrong
but is there still a term thelipstick lesbian or is that not
a thing
SPEAKER_00 (08:05):
you know what I am old enough to know I have no
idea oh okay what any terms areoh
SPEAKER_02 (08:12):
okay I just remember that being a term back when
SPEAKER_00 (08:16):
I don't know abbreviations through text
messages I am 31 years old and Ihave no idea well
SPEAKER_02 (08:20):
that's a good thing then hopefully a term like that
just died
SPEAKER_00 (08:23):
please just don't g Like, that's just weird.
SPEAKER_02 (08:27):
Gotta go.
I'm like, what does that mean?
I don't even know what thatmeant.
I just deciphered it for him.
I went way over my head.
I was like, Grand Theft Go?
I really did not know what thatmeant.
That's GTA, honey.
I've
SPEAKER_00 (08:45):
gotten to the stage where I'm just like, can you
just tell me what you'rethinking because I'm too fucking
old for this shit.
Just tell me.
SPEAKER_02 (08:54):
Well, speaking of changes, you had mentioned at
you know earlier when we werejust you know chit-chatting that
you were thinking about changingyour name because when the two
of you got married you adoptedyour wife's well you changed
your name and you guyshyphenated hyphenated okay
because like we didn't we keptour own surnames and just
(09:17):
because we're probably too damnlazy to change it
SPEAKER_00 (09:20):
but it is a huge huge So
SPEAKER_02 (09:22):
in that respect, because you said that you might
be changing it or you are goingto change it.
SPEAKER_00 (09:30):
So we haven't really gone through anything when it
comes to divorce and all that.
We're going to go through it.
I've been having a huge debateon what I wanted to do.
So back in the day, like.
When my mom ended up getting adivorce, she decided to keep my
dad's last name for a very longtime.
SPEAKER_02 (09:48):
So did my mom.
SPEAKER_00 (09:49):
Yeah.
And it wasn't until...
Well, she
SPEAKER_02 (09:50):
still has it, and she's 84.
SPEAKER_00 (09:52):
Yeah, and it wasn't until recently.
It wasn't until recently, as ina couple years ago, that she
changed it because she gotremarried.
Oh, yeah.
So it's a huge debate because...
Social security lines are solong.
I'm like, do I want to go out ofthat way or do I just want to
float on the river?
SPEAKER_02 (10:12):
When you guys got married, then how did you change
it at that time?
SPEAKER_00 (10:19):
So when we first got married, we both had a huge
conversation.
Actually, it was multipleconversations of what we were
going to do next.
At first, it was just going tobe her changing clothes.
Into my name.
SPEAKER_01 (10:31):
Okay.
SPEAKER_00 (10:32):
And then we went, okay, well, for mutual ground,
we're going to do this on paper,but we're going to go by my name
in general.
And so we went through all ofthat process, and it was a very
long process.
It was a pain in the butt.
SPEAKER_02 (10:48):
You didn't need an attorney, right?
You just did it on your own?
SPEAKER_00 (10:51):
I did it on my own, and I think that was the biggest
pain in the butt.
Why?
Why that was the biggest pain inthe butt.
SPEAKER_02 (10:58):
But you did it in Texas.
Do you think it would have been?
I
SPEAKER_00 (11:02):
did it in Austin, yes.
SPEAKER_02 (11:03):
But I guess what I was wondering, if it was easier
here, or is it the sameeverywhere?
Maybe you don't even know.
SPEAKER_00 (11:10):
I think when it comes to Social Security, I feel
like they have all the samesituations and rules because
it's a government.
SPEAKER_02 (11:17):
Yeah, federal.
SPEAKER_00 (11:18):
Yeah, it's the federal government, so you don't
really have a choice when itcomes to stuff like that.
And then every state just haswhere it goes.
Luckily, when we were living inSan Antonio, moved to Austin,
that's where the Social Securitywas.
So it was a lot easier for us.
SPEAKER_02 (11:35):
Did you file your taxes married finally jointly?
Yes, sir.
And you put your full names andyour new...
Surnames.
SPEAKER_00 (11:45):
All of it.
Yeah.
And it was a big pain in thebutt.
SPEAKER_02 (11:48):
Yeah.
Did you ever have any pushbackfrom any entity or, you know,
like, let's say, I don't know,you got stopped by a cop and
he's like, hey, this doesn'tmatch or, you know, anything
like that?
SPEAKER_00 (11:59):
No.
Brightside, when it comes toeverything that happened, that
never was an issue.
Okay.
They looked at it and they went,okay, cool.
Like, you're good.
Anything like that, but luckilyI don't get pulled over very
often, so I feel like that's agood thing.
SPEAKER_02 (12:16):
Unlike me.
Well.
So when you, did you, I don'tknow, but did you guys do JLP or
did you do something else?
SPEAKER_00 (12:27):
What do you mean?
SPEAKER_02 (12:28):
Justice of the Peace or did you go through?
Like how did you get married?
SPEAKER_00 (12:31):
Oh, so we had a lovely lesbian judge in San
Antonio.
Oh.
That actually just got...
You
SPEAKER_02 (12:38):
picked her or...
SPEAKER_00 (12:39):
I picked her.
Oh, okay.
You knew that.
And the reason why I picked heris because she...
She was an amazing human being.
She was married.
She's been a judge for a verylong time.
SPEAKER_02 (12:48):
You found that out on the internet?
SPEAKER_00 (12:50):
I did, actually.
And I'm also creepy, so IFacebook stalked her.
SPEAKER_02 (12:57):
I mean, were you specifically wanting that?
That's what you
SPEAKER_00 (13:00):
wanted to...
And also, the one thing that Iloved about this woman, and I
can't really...
I don't remember her name, whichis a totally good thing, to be
honest, but...
When it comes to gayrelationships in the LGBT
community, she did it for free.
SPEAKER_02 (13:15):
Oh.
Oh, that's so beautiful.
SPEAKER_00 (13:18):
I didn't know that.
Yeah, so our marriage wasconsummated and it was for free.
SPEAKER_02 (13:24):
Oh.
So, like, when we got married,we did the JLP, and we went in.
I think our judge was random,wasn't it?
No, I picked her.
Oh, you did, too?
I didn't know that.
Yeah, I picked her because shewas the only woman, and I looked
her up on the Internet, and Isaw that she married a lot of
gay people.
Oh.
And that she was very LGBTQIplus A friendly.
Oh.
And so that's the reason why.
(13:46):
I mean, if you look at herwedding photos, she's posing.
Like, come on, girl.
So five years later, I'm justlearning this.
I told you that.
You just forgot.
god it's a lapse in memory it'sokay yeah well I didn't yeah no
I picked her oh okay I pickedher for the same reasons exactly
I just picked her because I wasjust like you know when she's
(14:06):
not gonna have any issues likewho's that little person I don't
even remember her name thatdidn't want to marry the gay
people once gay marriage got youknow I don't even remember her
name because I don't care to butlet her yeah just go on her
looking like a Karen Go home andmake a sandwich.
(14:26):
Exactly.
Go have a Diet Coke.
But, yeah, that's why I pickedthem.
Okay.
Yeah, I did it on purpose.
I mean, there was a rhyme and areason.
Oh, all right, all right.
I guess what the point I wastrying to make is, you know, did
you run across any kind ofhomophobia at that time because
of two women getting married,changing your names in front of
(14:48):
anybody?
Did you guys...
receive any pushback at all
SPEAKER_00 (14:52):
so no actually we did not that's nice that is a
very lovely experience and i'vebeen out for a very long time
and i've experienced a lot ofhard situations and so the fact
that you know when i was readyto get married to the person i
was in love with and go forwardit was actually a very easy
(15:12):
transition which is really sweetbecause I came out a little bit
before and during Don't Ask,Don't Tell.
Yeah.
And I've had friends that wouldjust be pumping gas and got
beat.
And I've had situations whereI've been jumped with a lot of
(15:33):
people.
What?
Yeah.
What?
You got jumped?
You want to know what's evenmore funny?
What?
I got jumped by lesbians.
SPEAKER_02 (15:42):
That doesn't even make sense.
SPEAKER_00 (15:44):
No, it does not.
Were they
SPEAKER_02 (15:45):
trying to rob you?
No.
What?
You may not want to talk aboutit.
I get it.
It's a long story.
Yeah, that sounds really, reallyeffed
SPEAKER_00 (15:53):
up.
Yeah, but I've also been jumpedby straight guys because I look
the way I look.
SPEAKER_02 (15:59):
Well, you look great.
I mean, to me, you lookfantastic.
SPEAKER_00 (16:02):
I work out.
SPEAKER_02 (16:07):
That was funny.
That was a good one.
I try, you know?
You literally worked out at mein my garage 20 minutes ago.
Well, you know, I mean, notthat...
I guess what I was going to say,yeah, I remember the time that
Dalton got punched in the headat the Whataburger and got
knocked out, and that was fuckedup.
SPEAKER_00 (16:27):
That was a story that I think you actually sat
down and told me.
Oh, did I?
I found that very interesting.
SPEAKER_02 (16:32):
Yeah, it was a horrible experience.
It's probably because I don'tremember it because I was
unconscious.
Yeah, but from beginning to end,it was a nightmare.
So that's something I reallywant to remember, but I will
never forget it either.
SPEAKER_00 (16:44):
There's no way of being able to forget something
like that.
SPEAKER_02 (16:47):
No.
was scary really was scary
SPEAKER_00 (16:50):
and it's it's you know we where we're at right now
in 2024 it is a lot differentit's a little bit easier
especially living in austintexas and being where we're at
and people are a lot moreaccepting but there are still
situations that you get put inand you're just like oh
SPEAKER_02 (17:10):
Well, not to get all political, but if that Project
2025 goes through, we are goingto be in a different world,
literally a different world.
SPEAKER_00 (17:18):
Not just for our community, but for all women.
SPEAKER_02 (17:21):
Yeah.
Period.
SPEAKER_00 (17:22):
And that's going to be very hard.
SPEAKER_02 (17:24):
I mean, okay, that went over my
SPEAKER_00 (17:32):
head.
Yeah.
Yes, I agree.
I agree.
That's going to be a verydifficult time for all women and
all LGBTQ and everything else,community.
All of it's going to be verydifficult.
SPEAKER_02 (17:42):
How did you feel when Roe got overturned?
I mean, how did you really feel?
I
SPEAKER_00 (17:52):
felt angry.
SPEAKER_02 (17:55):
Oh, yeah.
SPEAKER_00 (17:56):
And I felt angry because...
Of course I'm a lesbian, andthere's a lot of things that,
you know, I can't just randomlyget pregnant.
But I felt angry for all womenbecause it's hurtful.
Like, why should you be takingaway...
A
SPEAKER_02 (18:12):
basic human
SPEAKER_00 (18:12):
right.
A basic human right.
SPEAKER_02 (18:14):
Especially when...
It's your own body.
Yeah.
Like if men were gettingpregnant, this would not be a
thing.
Oh, of course not.
SPEAKER_00 (18:23):
And you want us to, you know, we have human rights
and a sense of I could eatwhatever I want, I could drink
whatever I want, but yet I can'tscrew whoever I want.
Because if I do get pregnant,you're going to force me to have
something that I'm not willingto have.
And the
SPEAKER_02 (18:38):
whole no exceptions for rape or incest is beyond my
comprehension.
SPEAKER_00 (18:43):
Well, I think they said, like, within five weeks.
I think it's
SPEAKER_02 (18:46):
six.
Yeah, but still.
But, like, most people don'tknow they're pregnant.
SPEAKER_00 (18:52):
No, you don't know you're pregnant until you're
already in your, for the mostpart, when women, they don't
know they're pregnant untiltheir second trimester, and
that's already past the five tosix weeks, because you don't
know it, you don't feel it,there's nothing in your body
that really, like, it changes,but for the most part, you feel
bloated and frustrated, but youdon't know.
(19:14):
And it isn't until you take thatpregnancy test or you do those
things where you just sit thereand you're like, oh.
SPEAKER_02 (19:19):
Well, how early will those strips detect pregnancy?
Do you know?
SPEAKER_00 (19:25):
Normally.
SPEAKER_02 (19:26):
I'm sorry.
I'm really ignorant.
I sound stupid.
No.
Because I just really don'tknow.
You have different
SPEAKER_00 (19:31):
types, babe.
And you don't want to knowwhat's funny is I am gay, but I
have done a lot of research onthis because, you know, I'm a
family of seven.
And it's just a fun thing tolook at.
Like, I don't like to go toschool, but I like to learn
things.
I'm a huge learner.
And when it comes to stuff likethat, like, normally, like,
they'll have pregnancy testswhere you could do six days
before your period, or there's,like, 21 days or 27 days or
(19:55):
whatever, how many days afterthe last time you had
unprotected sex.
SPEAKER_02 (20:01):
You know, again, I'm going to sound really
ridiculous, but when you urinateon the strip...
What is it that determines theplus or negative?
It's the genome.
I'm not 100% accurate, but itmeasures whether or not you have
a baby in your tummy.
SPEAKER_00 (20:23):
What happens when it comes to making a baby, your
hormones fluctuate and they goup.
All of that type of situation,it all messes with your hormones
and that does still come out inthe pee.
That's why you're able toproject that and find out.
That's why a lot of tests areable to do it six days before
your missed period.
(20:44):
Or, like I said, 21 to 25 daysafter you had unprotected sex is
because your hormones, whenyou're pregnant, will already be
going up and down and trying tofigure all that stuff out.
SPEAKER_02 (20:58):
And there's no way, if you have your period, that
you're pregnant, right?
I don't know.
SPEAKER_00 (21:03):
Well, there's a lot of fun things on the Internet, a
lot of different misconceptionson that.
So there's—and I've—which isfunny— Because I randomly would
scroll and read this stuff.
SPEAKER_02 (21:17):
It's pertinent to your body.
SPEAKER_00 (21:18):
Yeah.
I'm a woman.
I don't have sex with men.
Like a prostate for me.
SPEAKER_02 (21:22):
Yeah.
SPEAKER_00 (21:22):
I don't have sex with men.
It's a pineapple.
But I still want to learn it.
And it's not a huge percentage,but there is a percentage of
women that do tend to haveunprotected sex, have their
period, think that they're fine,and then their next period,
they're pregnant.
SPEAKER_02 (21:40):
And then the next thing, they have a baby in the
toilet.
That's crazy.
SPEAKER_00 (21:43):
What?
Not even in the toilet.
It's more along the lines of,
SPEAKER_02 (21:46):
like...
Have you not ever heard that,like, I think I didn't know I
was pregnant?
Is that an urban legend thing?
No, I didn't know I waspregnant, and the next thing you
know, there's a baby when theythink they're going to have a
baby.
No, like, as the next thing youknow, my water just broke.
That's not true.
Yeah.
That's not true.
You've not seen that show?
I didn't know I was pregnant.
SPEAKER_00 (22:04):
Yeah, that is very true.
We're going to have to Google itand YouTube it or something.
It's more along the lines of...
Heavier set women that do dealwith that because, I mean, if
you're heavier set, you don'treally know that you're
pregnant, which, by the way, Iam a personal trainer as well,
so I know a lot of differentthings like that.
SPEAKER_02 (22:26):
That's
SPEAKER_00 (22:27):
right.
You look the way you look.
Fantastic.
Yeah.
Yeah.
I work out.
I work out.
But that is the reason why Iknow a lot of these things.
When it comes to stuff likethat, that it doesn't really
happen very often.
It's not a misconception.
It's just a very small and rarepercentage of situations
SPEAKER_02 (22:48):
that happen.
SPEAKER_00 (22:50):
It's a TLC show.
Yes, but when you put hundredsof millions of people, and then
you're like, there's at least15, you're going to put them on
the show.
SPEAKER_02 (22:58):
Well, reeling this back a little bit, I guess
another one of my questions,because of the...
Well, let me just straight upask, what stage are you at in
terms of your relationship?
Are you guys really cutting it?
I know that's personal if youdon't feel like...
SPEAKER_00 (23:16):
It's a very difficult question.
I guess because I
SPEAKER_02 (23:21):
was thinking about financially...
cutting it that requires a lotthat goes into that decision of
course separation of bankaccounts money changing her name
physical well yeah i mean youknow the cost of everything you
know all of it that's a there'sa lot anyway that's where i was
really thinking
SPEAKER_00 (23:40):
and the thing is is um we were together for a very
long time and there is nothingbad i could say we had an
amazing experience I wanted tobe the rest of my life and it
happened to be a chapter.
And that's one thing that Icould 100% vocalize is she is a
beautiful person and shedeserves the entire world.
SPEAKER_02 (24:02):
That's nice of you to
SPEAKER_00 (24:03):
say.
And the fact that, you know, itwasn't with me is okay.
And we both have to grow and wehave to heal.
We have to love and moveforward.
And we're both at that point intime where it's like, I still
love you and I will always loveyou.
but it just won't be with eachother.
And when it comes to finances,it was a little bit easy because
(24:26):
clearly we do not have children.
We don't have a house.
We don't have a whole lot.
So it was a lot easy.
I had a car, and we already tookthat off.
Like, all that is kind of set instone.
Realistically, moving forward,no, I do not believe that we
belong together.
But realistically...
(24:46):
I will always love her.
SPEAKER_02 (24:48):
But even with all that said, I mean, there are
still certain obstacles you haveto hop through, like you
mentioned earlier, like yourauto insurance, you know, et
cetera.
I mean, did you guys even havethings like wills, powers of
attorney, life insurance, thingsthat you created beneficiaries
for each other on?
SPEAKER_00 (25:06):
We did.
Fun thing.
I used to always make a jokeabout this.
I feel like.
Because I'm a barber.
I've been a barber for 10 years.
I have my own Roth accounts andcertain things like that.
And I would always make a jokewhere it's like, you know, I
could push you down the stairsand I'll get$80,000.
If you pushed me down thestairs, you'd get nothing.
(25:27):
You'd just cry.
And we would always make thatjoke because I always thought it
was really funny because I'd belike, you'd just cry.
SPEAKER_02 (25:33):
Yeah, because you never took out a policy, I'm
guessing.
SPEAKER_00 (25:36):
I agree.
She is my beneficiary still.
On all of my 401ks and Rothaccounts and stuff like that.
I have not changed that.
I have no desire to change itbecause realistically, when it
comes to, you know, it was amutual divorce.
Like I said, we both still loveeach other immensely.
(25:57):
She is a person that has been inmy life for so many years and I
have so many beautiful memoriesfor.
I don't want to...
be so drastic on a lot of thosethings.
But it will happen sooner orlater.
And I'm her beneficiary onpretty much all of her 401ks and
(26:19):
all of stuff like that, whichI'm sure will change.
Eventually.
SPEAKER_02 (26:23):
Oh, yeah, maybe when you guys meet other
SPEAKER_00 (26:26):
people.
Officially, or divorce, or
SPEAKER_02 (26:28):
anything like that.
But at this point, it's justlike, okay, this is fresh, this
is new.
Shoot, if we got divorced, thefirst thing you would do is
change your beneficiaries.
It's already not you.
What an a-hole.
What an a-hole.
Oh, my God.
It's my dog.
I need to go and revisit allthat.
UNKNOWN (26:48):
I don't know if you know this, Jerry, but it's me.
SPEAKER_02 (26:50):
Wow.
Wow.
That was in confidence, Alina.
I'm just joking.
Obviously, it's you.
Duds, you dummy.
SPEAKER_00 (27:03):
I feel like a divorce takes a while, and I
have no desire to notcommunicate and go through this
as cordially as possible.
You're
SPEAKER_02 (27:11):
being big people.
SPEAKER_00 (27:12):
Yes, we're both being adults like everyone
should be.
I don't want to look back in thenext 10 years and be like, I was
mean to the one person person Idecided to marry
SPEAKER_02 (27:22):
that's nice of you
SPEAKER_00 (27:22):
I want to look back and just continue to look at the
beautiful memories that we madebecause that's what I get to
hold with the rest of my lifelike I do not want to sit here
and say well you did this and Idid that like no
SPEAKER_02 (27:36):
wonder if she wanted your dog
SPEAKER_00 (27:38):
she did not
SPEAKER_02 (27:40):
oh okay
SPEAKER_00 (27:41):
well that was easy we both we were both very well
aware that like my dog's my dogyour dog's your dog and the cat
is mine
SPEAKER_02 (27:48):
okay
SPEAKER_00 (27:50):
And she was just like, yeah.
Don't forget
SPEAKER_02 (27:52):
the fish.
SPEAKER_00 (27:53):
I mean, the fish is mine.
Come on.
I thought the fish died.
No.
Oh, my God.
I wish they did.
SPEAKER_02 (28:00):
Why?
You don't want to take care ofthem?
Such a pain in the butt.
Oh.
Give them to Dalton.
She already did.
Oh, okay.
She gave me that fish tank.
Quick change of subjects.
You had mentioned a funny storyyou were going to say.
Is that okay?
SPEAKER_00 (28:19):
Yeah, but it's not.
It's disgusting.
This is going to
SPEAKER_02 (28:21):
be all right, dude.
Okay.
Well, I'm cool with that.
Is that dirty words in it orwhat?
Oh, no.
Not if you don't want to usethem.
Well, all right.
Well, I'm game to hear it.
SPEAKER_00 (28:33):
Okay.
So, I just recently heard astory from a friend, which...
She heard it from someone else.
Telephone.
Telephone.
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
It was just a very interestingstory where I felt like I had to
go.
Is this real?
Yes.
Who knows?
Yes.
Okay.
It's a real story.
Okay.
I love these.
And I just felt like I have totell everyone.
Okay.
(28:53):
I'm everyone.
It was so gross.
I'm everyone.
It was so disgusting.
I went.
Ew.
And I immediately went to thenext person and went, do you
want to know a new story?
That's that whole
SPEAKER_02 (29:04):
thing.
That's Olympia Dukakis.
You know, if you can't sayanything nice, come sit over by
me.
Exactly.
SPEAKER_00 (29:09):
And it was so interesting.
So a man and their husband, ahusband and their wife.
SPEAKER_01 (29:16):
Yeah.
SPEAKER_00 (29:16):
Right.
They were just hanging out oneday and it was a very nice day.
It was just chill.
And they decided to want to, youknow.
Have the deed.
Okay.
And unfortunately, they did nothave any lube.
SPEAKER_02 (29:31):
Mm-hmm.
Yes.
You spit on it.
Cuck-pooey.
Cuck-pooey.
Cuck-pooey.
Cuck-pooey, whatever.
Cuck-pooey.
SPEAKER_00 (29:39):
Cuck-pooey.
Well, anyways, move forwardabout three weeks later, she's
just sitting there foldingtowels.
And she just keeps orgasming,and she's like, I don't know
what's happening.
Like, there's nothing wrong.
Lucky girl.
Yeah, right?
You would think.
And then she was washing dishes,and then she would come, and it
was a very interesting thing.
So she finally made a phone callto the gyno because it happened
(29:59):
about 15, 16 more times.
SPEAKER_01 (30:01):
Wow.
SPEAKER_00 (30:02):
And, yeah.
And so what happened was, is,like, she went to the gyno, and
they were asking her a bunch ofquestions, and they're like,
hey, like...
What's wrong?
Like all this type of thing.
And they're like, well, I don'tknow.
I just keep orgasming.
It's making me feel veryuncomfortable because I'm just
doing daily activities.
And I'm all by myself.
Yeah, this is incorrect.
(30:23):
And when it comes to all women,I don't know if any women listen
to your podcast, but I'm sure abunch do.
They all know that's a veryuncomfortable feeling to be out
at the grocery store and all ofa sudden come.
SPEAKER_02 (30:34):
Or your child's playground.
It's that whole Harry and Sallything where you're like,
SPEAKER_01 (30:41):
ah, ah, ah, ah.
SPEAKER_02 (30:43):
I'll have what she's having.
Seven, seven, seven, like fromFriends.
SPEAKER_00 (30:47):
Exactly.
And then you're just like, Ididn't know that coffee was that
good.
It's
SPEAKER_01 (30:51):
a crazy feeling.
SPEAKER_00 (30:54):
So, yeah, so that was going on.
And the gyno literally looked upand she went, When was the last
time you had sex?
She was like, about three orfour weeks ago.
And she was like, did you useanything that wasn't lube or
anything like that?
And she was like, oh, why?
And the lady literally went,unfortunately.
(31:15):
I was having sex with myhusband, and we used mayonnaise.
SPEAKER_02 (31:18):
Oh, my gosh.
You don't make egg salad.
SPEAKER_00 (31:22):
Because we didn't have lube.
Yeah.
And, yeah.
And so that happened.
And she was like, well,unfortunately, we're going to
have to flush you out becausethe thing that is giving you
orgasms are hundreds andthousands of maggots.
SPEAKER_02 (31:37):
Oh, shit.
Oh, my.
My God.
I didn't mean to say cuss orsorry.
Oh, my God.
What?
Oh, my.
Oh.
Oh.
Oh.
The visual I just got.
I just pictured it, too.
Oh, my God.
A little lantern.
Oh, maggots.
Lord have mercy.
Maggots.
Oh, my God.
That is not real.
That's a made-up story.
SPEAKER_00 (32:00):
No, it was a real story.
And imagine the flush that theyhad to do with
SPEAKER_02 (32:05):
her.
And the antibiotics.
That cannot be true.
They needed to take a fireengine hose up there.
That cannot be true.
When you got to go pee, you'regoing to pee it out.
SPEAKER_00 (32:13):
Well, no.
What would happen is you wouldfeel like you have- You don't
pee out
SPEAKER_02 (32:15):
your vagina, baby.
SPEAKER_00 (32:16):
You do not.
But what would happen- There'sdifferent holes.
You would have gotten a yeastinfection.
You would have felt all this.
But when it comes to maggots,they eat stuff like
SPEAKER_02 (32:26):
that.
Man, I am literally speechless.
SPEAKER_00 (32:31):
She would have never gotten a yeast infection.
She would have never figuredthat stuff out because they.
eat stuff like that.
SPEAKER_02 (32:39):
I'm going to throw
SPEAKER_00 (32:44):
my face up.
She got flushed a bunch of timesand she had to take a bunch of
antibiotics.
Now she's fully recovered andshe's totally fine.
I thought that was the nastiestthing I've ever heard.
I have to tell every singleperson I meet.
SPEAKER_02 (32:58):
Yikes.
No more fun times anywhere.
No more mayonnaise.
Next time she eats potato salad,she's It's going to be like...
Who's using mayonnaise of allthings?
I guess it's greasy enough.
SPEAKER_00 (33:12):
Well, one thing that, I mean, y'all should know
is, like, women...
are naturally
SPEAKER_02 (33:18):
moist
SPEAKER_00 (33:19):
moist especially if they're turned on well and if
you want to go
SPEAKER_02 (33:22):
down there and you know
SPEAKER_00 (33:23):
exactly so it's like the fact that she wasn't turned
on that much yeah to need lubeor mayonnaise that's crazy
because i do not need that wheni'm turned on i'm a fucking fire
hydrant like i don't need that
SPEAKER_02 (33:40):
So
SPEAKER_00 (33:41):
it's a very interesting thing to think
about.
You
SPEAKER_02 (33:44):
don't even know how
SPEAKER_00 (33:45):
to.
Also, like, you're welcome.
SPEAKER_02 (33:47):
All I can say is I'm glad I'm not a lady.
Sorry.
I mean, sometimes we can dressup as them.
SPEAKER_00 (33:54):
Yeah, but I'm not going to end up with.
But we do orgasm more thany'all.
Oh, yeah.
Lucky you.
SPEAKER_02 (34:00):
Okay.
Lucky you.
One positive, but it's still aswampy cave.
Oh, my Lord have mercy.
Well, I'm not.
No.
SPEAKER_01 (34:10):
No.
You said you wanted to know thestory, Jerry.
Yes.
SPEAKER_02 (34:12):
Oh, my God.
No, he doesn't.
Yeah.
Well, if you were listening tothis podcast for financial
advice, you didn't get any.
We didn't do it today.
It's not today.
All you learned is don't usemayo.
And all you learned is, yeah,don't do mayo.
Or see your guy on a moreregular basis.
(34:33):
And we're just having abeautiful afternoon on a Monday.
Yeah.
For sure.
For sure.
Well, Melina, it was anexperience, a very pleasant one.
Until the end.
No, even the end.
I didn't care.
I didn't expect that, but that'sokay.
I would never have ever in mywildest dreams come across that
(34:55):
and...
Thought that was a thing.
Now you're going to Google it,aren't you?
SPEAKER_00 (34:58):
No, I'm not.
I had an amazing time.
Thank you so much for having meon your podcast.
SPEAKER_02 (35:04):
Well, and I'm sorry if we got too personal with you,
you know, but I think real lifeexperiences help other people
who, you know.
Might be going through some of
SPEAKER_00 (35:13):
the same things.
Yeah, yeah.
I'm definitely an open book.
I will never go out of my wayand say that's too much.
It's exactly what you said.
Everyone deals with it andeveryone's going through a lot
of different things and if Icould help anybody then that's a
good thing.
SPEAKER_02 (35:30):
You don't know who you're helping.
SPEAKER_00 (35:32):
Exactly.
SPEAKER_02 (35:32):
Especially when it comes to mutual divorce.
Do you know what I mean?
And mutually exclusiveness.
And I guess communication was agood key on y'all's part because
you communicated about it versusjust throwing papers in her
face.
Do you know what
SPEAKER_00 (35:47):
I mean?
And it's because realisticallywe still both love each other
and we both deserve the samerespect.
And I would never disrespect herin that way.
And that's something that not alot of people could go through
I've heard a lot of differentdivorce conversations where it
was like very rude and I stillhate her and it's been 10 years
(36:08):
and it's just a very interestingthing and that's something that
I'll never do because it's likeit's it's a person that I once
loved I will never hate her
SPEAKER_02 (36:16):
can you quickly talk about your you mentioned your
last day if you will I don'tknow if you want to call it your
last day but the day you guyssort of spent together so I
thought that was sweet
SPEAKER_00 (36:28):
Yeah, the last day was very lovely.
We had a three-hour phone call,and it was very sad.
There was a lot of crying, andthere was a lot of understanding
that we both need to grow andheal, and it just won't be
together.
And so something that I broughtup was, well, can I see you
again?
And we will have a good firstand last day.
(36:51):
And so we went to a restaurantthat actually we got our
marriage license in.
We got to that restaurant.
We ate food.
We went to Central Market.
We went to a couple of otherstores.
And it just felt normal andblissful because we've been
together for so long.
It was just a nice, peacefulday.
And it was something that I feellike we both needed at that
(37:13):
point in time.
And To move forward like weknew.
Just because we need to grow andheal separately doesn't mean we
still don't care about eachother.
SPEAKER_02 (37:22):
That's super, super sweet.
I don't know if I'd be thatsweet.
SPEAKER_00 (37:26):
I don't think you would.
SPEAKER_02 (37:30):
Yeah.
SPEAKER_00 (37:30):
But it's something that I wanted to
SPEAKER_02 (37:32):
do.
Yes, you would.
No, I'm not.
SPEAKER_00 (37:34):
It's something that I wanted to do to grow and, like
I said, grow and heal.
And just because we didn't endup together the way we thought
doesn't mean it's...
Forever going to be the worstthing in the world.
SPEAKER_02 (37:46):
And you never know.
You never know down the road.
You guys are young.
When you get to my age, you kindof let bygones be bygones in a
lot of ways for a lot of people.
Not everybody, but a lot ofpeople.
You
SPEAKER_00 (37:59):
let it go.
And I'm the type of person thatI believe in karma.
And I always want to push...
Even in bad situations, I alwayswant to find optimistic
situations.
And I always want to be the bestperson that I can be, even in
bad situations.
And that's just where I'm atright now in my life.
And I'm okay with that.
And I feel like I'm healing andI'm growing.
(38:21):
And that's all you can reallyask out of life itself.
SPEAKER_02 (38:24):
There you go.
I agree.
I agree, hon.
So thank you both for beinghere.
I really enjoyed it.
I really learned something,believe it or not.
What?
Don't use mayonnaise?
Beyond that, beyond that, yes.
I really didn't know.
I'm not even going to say it.
I'm not going
SPEAKER_00 (38:44):
to say it.
I think we all learned don't usemayonnaise.
I think
SPEAKER_02 (38:47):
that's a life lesson.
If you take any money besidesfinancial advice, don't use
mayonnaise.
Yikes.
All right, bye.
All right, well, thank you allfor joining us today and have a
great day.
Let's party.
Thank you.
SPEAKER_02 (00:53):
Hello and welcome to the Pink Bunny Podcast and I'm
your host Jerry Williams andtoday we've got a couple guests
that are going to join me today.
I have my husband Dalton.
Hi.
And we also have Melina here.
SPEAKER_00 (01:07):
Howdy howdy.
SPEAKER_02 (01:08):
So I invited them today because there's a few
things that I think from awoman's perspective, I think
are, is helpful to a lot ofpeople because my experiences,
Dalton's experiences are waydifferent than your experiences,
especially when it comes to, youknow, being in the LGBTQ
(01:30):
community and dealing with thepublic.
You know, there are certainthings that I think as men, we
get a lot of, you know, take alot of shit for.
And it's different from women, Ithink.
Well, I mean, especially lesbian
SPEAKER_00 (01:44):
women, you know.
I do agree in a lot of thosedifferent aspects.
When it comes to...
I do agree in that, 100%.
And when it comes to a lot oflesbians, it's a back and forth.
The reason why I say that isbecause we don't really get a
whole lot from straight people.
We get actually more from gays.
SPEAKER_02 (02:04):
Meaning?
SPEAKER_00 (02:05):
Meaning...
I will have more of aconfrontation when it comes to
gay men than I would with anystraight person.
And that's why a lot of lesbianstend to go to straight bars
because all straight men want todo is convert them back.
SPEAKER_02 (02:22):
Yeah, like they can.
SPEAKER_00 (02:23):
Exactly.
They can't.
But that is a huge issue.
And compared to if I was to goto a gay bar, it's more along
the lines of like, ugh.
lesbians.
SPEAKER_02 (02:34):
Oh, you're
SPEAKER_00 (02:35):
in my territory.
Yeah, and a lot of times it goesto, like, I'll go to a bar and
I'll try to get a drink and Iwill be the last one taken care
of.
No way! And I would be the firstone at the bar.
Are you serious?
All the time.
It's happened for, I mean, I'vebeen gay for about, shoot, a
very long time.
Wow.
(02:56):
Correct, since I was born.
And yeah, so that's been a hugething and it's really fun For me
to actually go out of my way andbring random people because
they're like, no, you're cool,you're amazing, you're this.
And I'm like, watch.
And I will literally go to a gaybar, especially in San Antonio
or Austin or anything like that,and I'll go and there'll be 15,
(03:18):
20 gay men, all amazing,beautiful human beings.
SPEAKER_02 (03:23):
Not all of
SPEAKER_00 (03:25):
them.
I mean...
I'm trying to be nice.
But then I'll sit there and thenI'll be the last one taken care
of.
SPEAKER_02 (03:34):
Oh, that really sucks.
SPEAKER_00 (03:35):
It's a very interesting thing to think
about.
Yeah.
And you only really deal with itas being a lesbian.
SPEAKER_02 (03:42):
Oh, that's...
I'm really disappointed to hearthat, honestly.
I did not know that.
SPEAKER_00 (03:47):
Yeah, that's why most lesbians, like, they'll go
to the gay bars every now andthen, but for the most part,
they'll go to a random straightbar because...
They'll get taken care of.
SPEAKER_02 (03:57):
Wow.
You know, I'm old.
I'm going to be 62 this year.
But I remember when, and I'vetold Dalton this before, you
know, when I was coming out andgoing out, I don't go obviously
as much as I used to, but besidethe point, I remember when in
certain leather bars, women werenot allowed at all.
(04:18):
At all.
And if they were to try to getin, they would...
come up with some ridiculousthing like, oh, you're wearing
open-toed shoes.
Oh, you have cologne on orperfume or whatever.
It would be some reason to tell,to exclude you.
SPEAKER_00 (04:37):
You don't have a handkerchief in the back of your
pocket.
SPEAKER_02 (04:39):
Anything.
Yeah, exactly.
I mean, that still happens.
Like, we were just looking upthat thing in Vegas, right?
The other day, like, that BarbDries or whatever the hell it's
called, and they're saying,like, you can't wear jeans.
Oh, well, that's a dress code.
But I'm just saying, at the sametime, they can find a way to not
let you in because they'reostracizing you because they
(04:59):
think you're ugly or whateveryou're gay you're a lesbian
you're you know
SPEAKER_00 (05:04):
but when you really think about it like that happens
everywhere like just another ithink two weeks ago i went to a
bar and they did not let me inwhat yeah it's because i had a i
had my crow like my neck tattoo
SPEAKER_02 (05:18):
and
SPEAKER_00 (05:19):
and they literally went sorry
SPEAKER_02 (05:20):
Oh, you're a threat.
Yeah.
SPEAKER_00 (05:22):
Or who knows?
I'm a threat.
And I was like, that's body art.
Like, I'm not.
Was it a bar
SPEAKER_02 (05:27):
bar or like a restaurant bar?
SPEAKER_00 (05:28):
It was a bar bar.
It was, what is that one bar?
Downtown, I think it's SanAntonio.
Anyway, we don't have the nameon it.
It doesn't really matter.
Yeah.
SPEAKER_02 (05:39):
Because they didn't let you in, so why name them?
Disappointing.
SPEAKER_00 (05:43):
Exactly.
They deserve all the people.
Hey.
Because I used to go there allthe time.
It was an amazing place.
But, yeah, so they wouldn't letme in.
And I was like, oh, that'sweird.
But that is also a normal thing.
And that's why we just talkedabout, like, that's dress code.
Yeah.
It happens all the time.
SPEAKER_02 (06:02):
Well, when you and your, I'm going to say your
wife, even though I know thatthings are changing for you.
She
SPEAKER_00 (06:10):
is, yes, you're my wife.
SPEAKER_02 (06:12):
When you guys would go out, did you also experience
that same thing as a couple?
SPEAKER_00 (06:21):
Or did people even know?
It was really funny becausewe've been married for a long
time.
And in the beginning, it wasvery funny because I would say,
hey, these are things that I'vedealt with.
Because she wasn't
SPEAKER_02 (06:35):
as...
SPEAKER_00 (06:37):
She was experienced, but she wasn't as experienced as
I am.
Okay.
And so when we finally went outto the gay bars or whatever, I
went, hey, watch this.
And she went, what?
And I was like, I'm going to bethe last one to be taken care
of.
And it literally happened.
And then she sat there and shelooked at me and she went, are
(06:58):
you serious?
SPEAKER_02 (06:59):
Did that really happen?
SPEAKER_00 (07:01):
Did that really just happen because you've been in
the industry for so long?
You're going to get tipped well.
But you are willing to look at aperson and be like, lesbian, I
don't want to take care of youjust because I'm at the gay bars
and just because you're a gayguy.
And I love gay men.
Clearly, I'm on this podcast.
SPEAKER_02 (07:20):
I mean, I think it's because Caitlin hasn't
experienced it because...
Well, she did because she waswith her.
Well, she experienced it, butshe hasn't experienced it
because she's more not of thelooking like a lesbian.
Do you know what I mean?
More feminine, so to speak, inher looks.
Not...
anything other than that but Ifeel like she hasn't experienced
(07:40):
it before because like they'rejust like oh another little
queen here on her bacheloretteparty get her drinks so she can
go back
SPEAKER_00 (07:47):
on the dance floor so you're probably saying like
okay she's just a straight womandoing whatever she wants exactly
when she's with me it's adifferent type of not to be
SPEAKER_02 (07:57):
this may come across rude so correct me if I'm wrong
but is there still a term thelipstick lesbian or is that not
a thing
SPEAKER_00 (08:05):
you know what I am old enough to know I have no
idea oh okay what any terms areoh
SPEAKER_02 (08:12):
okay I just remember that being a term back when
SPEAKER_00 (08:16):
I don't know abbreviations through text
messages I am 31 years old and Ihave no idea well
SPEAKER_02 (08:20):
that's a good thing then hopefully a term like that
just died
SPEAKER_00 (08:23):
please just don't g Like, that's just weird.
SPEAKER_02 (08:27):
Gotta go.
I'm like, what does that mean?
I don't even know what thatmeant.
I just deciphered it for him.
I went way over my head.
I was like, Grand Theft Go?
I really did not know what thatmeant.
That's GTA, honey.
I've
SPEAKER_00 (08:45):
gotten to the stage where I'm just like, can you
just tell me what you'rethinking because I'm too fucking
old for this shit.
Just tell me.
SPEAKER_02 (08:54):
Well, speaking of changes, you had mentioned at
you know earlier when we werejust you know chit-chatting that
you were thinking about changingyour name because when the two
of you got married you adoptedyour wife's well you changed
your name and you guyshyphenated hyphenated okay
because like we didn't we keptour own surnames and just
(09:17):
because we're probably too damnlazy to change it
SPEAKER_00 (09:20):
but it is a huge huge So
SPEAKER_02 (09:22):
in that respect, because you said that you might
be changing it or you are goingto change it.
SPEAKER_00 (09:30):
So we haven't really gone through anything when it
comes to divorce and all that.
We're going to go through it.
I've been having a huge debateon what I wanted to do.
So back in the day, like.
When my mom ended up getting adivorce, she decided to keep my
dad's last name for a very longtime.
SPEAKER_02 (09:48):
So did my mom.
SPEAKER_00 (09:49):
Yeah.
And it wasn't until...
Well, she
SPEAKER_02 (09:50):
still has it, and she's 84.
SPEAKER_00 (09:52):
Yeah, and it wasn't until recently.
It wasn't until recently, as ina couple years ago, that she
changed it because she gotremarried.
Oh, yeah.
So it's a huge debate because...
Social security lines are solong.
I'm like, do I want to go out ofthat way or do I just want to
float on the river?
SPEAKER_02 (10:12):
When you guys got married, then how did you change
it at that time?
SPEAKER_00 (10:19):
So when we first got married, we both had a huge
conversation.
Actually, it was multipleconversations of what we were
going to do next.
At first, it was just going tobe her changing clothes.
Into my name.
SPEAKER_01 (10:31):
Okay.
SPEAKER_00 (10:32):
And then we went, okay, well, for mutual ground,
we're going to do this on paper,but we're going to go by my name
in general.
And so we went through all ofthat process, and it was a very
long process.
It was a pain in the butt.
SPEAKER_02 (10:48):
You didn't need an attorney, right?
You just did it on your own?
SPEAKER_00 (10:51):
I did it on my own, and I think that was the biggest
pain in the butt.
Why?
Why that was the biggest pain inthe butt.
SPEAKER_02 (10:58):
But you did it in Texas.
Do you think it would have been?
I
SPEAKER_00 (11:02):
did it in Austin, yes.
SPEAKER_02 (11:03):
But I guess what I was wondering, if it was easier
here, or is it the sameeverywhere?
Maybe you don't even know.
SPEAKER_00 (11:10):
I think when it comes to Social Security, I feel
like they have all the samesituations and rules because
it's a government.
SPEAKER_02 (11:17):
Yeah, federal.
SPEAKER_00 (11:18):
Yeah, it's the federal government, so you don't
really have a choice when itcomes to stuff like that.
And then every state just haswhere it goes.
Luckily, when we were living inSan Antonio, moved to Austin,
that's where the Social Securitywas.
So it was a lot easier for us.
SPEAKER_02 (11:35):
Did you file your taxes married finally jointly?
Yes, sir.
And you put your full names andyour new...
Surnames.
SPEAKER_00 (11:45):
All of it.
Yeah.
And it was a big pain in thebutt.
SPEAKER_02 (11:48):
Yeah.
Did you ever have any pushbackfrom any entity or, you know,
like, let's say, I don't know,you got stopped by a cop and
he's like, hey, this doesn'tmatch or, you know, anything
like that?
SPEAKER_00 (11:59):
No.
Brightside, when it comes toeverything that happened, that
never was an issue.
Okay.
They looked at it and they went,okay, cool.
Like, you're good.
Anything like that, but luckilyI don't get pulled over very
often, so I feel like that's agood thing.
SPEAKER_02 (12:16):
Unlike me.
Well.
So when you, did you, I don'tknow, but did you guys do JLP or
did you do something else?
SPEAKER_00 (12:27):
What do you mean?
SPEAKER_02 (12:28):
Justice of the Peace or did you go through?
Like how did you get married?
SPEAKER_00 (12:31):
Oh, so we had a lovely lesbian judge in San
Antonio.
Oh.
That actually just got...
You
SPEAKER_02 (12:38):
picked her or...
SPEAKER_00 (12:39):
I picked her.
Oh, okay.
You knew that.
And the reason why I picked heris because she...
She was an amazing human being.
She was married.
She's been a judge for a verylong time.
SPEAKER_02 (12:48):
You found that out on the internet?
SPEAKER_00 (12:50):
I did, actually.
And I'm also creepy, so IFacebook stalked her.
SPEAKER_02 (12:57):
I mean, were you specifically wanting that?
That's what you
SPEAKER_00 (13:00):
wanted to...
And also, the one thing that Iloved about this woman, and I
can't really...
I don't remember her name, whichis a totally good thing, to be
honest, but...
When it comes to gayrelationships in the LGBT
community, she did it for free.
SPEAKER_02 (13:15):
Oh.
Oh, that's so beautiful.
SPEAKER_00 (13:18):
I didn't know that.
Yeah, so our marriage wasconsummated and it was for free.
SPEAKER_02 (13:24):
Oh.
So, like, when we got married,we did the JLP, and we went in.
I think our judge was random,wasn't it?
No, I picked her.
Oh, you did, too?
I didn't know that.
Yeah, I picked her because shewas the only woman, and I looked
her up on the Internet, and Isaw that she married a lot of
gay people.
Oh.
And that she was very LGBTQIplus A friendly.
Oh.
And so that's the reason why.
(13:46):
I mean, if you look at herwedding photos, she's posing.
Like, come on, girl.
So five years later, I'm justlearning this.
I told you that.
You just forgot.
god it's a lapse in memory it'sokay yeah well I didn't yeah no
I picked her oh okay I pickedher for the same reasons exactly
I just picked her because I wasjust like you know when she's
(14:06):
not gonna have any issues likewho's that little person I don't
even remember her name thatdidn't want to marry the gay
people once gay marriage got youknow I don't even remember her
name because I don't care to butlet her yeah just go on her
looking like a Karen Go home andmake a sandwich.
(14:26):
Exactly.
Go have a Diet Coke.
But, yeah, that's why I pickedthem.
Okay.
Yeah, I did it on purpose.
I mean, there was a rhyme and areason.
Oh, all right, all right.
I guess what the point I wastrying to make is, you know, did
you run across any kind ofhomophobia at that time because
of two women getting married,changing your names in front of
(14:48):
anybody?
Did you guys...
receive any pushback at all
SPEAKER_00 (14:52):
so no actually we did not that's nice that is a
very lovely experience and i'vebeen out for a very long time
and i've experienced a lot ofhard situations and so the fact
that you know when i was readyto get married to the person i
was in love with and go forwardit was actually a very easy
(15:12):
transition which is really sweetbecause I came out a little bit
before and during Don't Ask,Don't Tell.
Yeah.
And I've had friends that wouldjust be pumping gas and got
beat.
And I've had situations whereI've been jumped with a lot of
(15:33):
people.
What?
Yeah.
What?
You got jumped?
You want to know what's evenmore funny?
What?
I got jumped by lesbians.
SPEAKER_02 (15:42):
That doesn't even make sense.
SPEAKER_00 (15:44):
No, it does not.
Were they
SPEAKER_02 (15:45):
trying to rob you?
No.
What?
You may not want to talk aboutit.
I get it.
It's a long story.
Yeah, that sounds really, reallyeffed
SPEAKER_00 (15:53):
up.
Yeah, but I've also been jumpedby straight guys because I look
the way I look.
SPEAKER_02 (15:59):
Well, you look great.
I mean, to me, you lookfantastic.
SPEAKER_00 (16:02):
I work out.
SPEAKER_02 (16:07):
That was funny.
That was a good one.
I try, you know?
You literally worked out at mein my garage 20 minutes ago.
Well, you know, I mean, notthat...
I guess what I was going to say,yeah, I remember the time that
Dalton got punched in the headat the Whataburger and got
knocked out, and that was fuckedup.
SPEAKER_00 (16:27):
That was a story that I think you actually sat
down and told me.
Oh, did I?
I found that very interesting.
SPEAKER_02 (16:32):
Yeah, it was a horrible experience.
It's probably because I don'tremember it because I was
unconscious.
Yeah, but from beginning to end,it was a nightmare.
So that's something I reallywant to remember, but I will
never forget it either.
SPEAKER_00 (16:44):
There's no way of being able to forget something
like that.
SPEAKER_02 (16:47):
No.
was scary really was scary
SPEAKER_00 (16:50):
and it's it's you know we where we're at right now
in 2024 it is a lot differentit's a little bit easier
especially living in austintexas and being where we're at
and people are a lot moreaccepting but there are still
situations that you get put inand you're just like oh
SPEAKER_02 (17:10):
Well, not to get all political, but if that Project
2025 goes through, we are goingto be in a different world,
literally a different world.
SPEAKER_00 (17:18):
Not just for our community, but for all women.
SPEAKER_02 (17:21):
Yeah.
Period.
SPEAKER_00 (17:22):
And that's going to be very hard.
SPEAKER_02 (17:24):
I mean, okay, that went over my
SPEAKER_00 (17:32):
head.
Yeah.
Yes, I agree.
I agree.
That's going to be a verydifficult time for all women and
all LGBTQ and everything else,community.
All of it's going to be verydifficult.
SPEAKER_02 (17:42):
How did you feel when Roe got overturned?
I mean, how did you really feel?
I
SPEAKER_00 (17:52):
felt angry.
SPEAKER_02 (17:55):
Oh, yeah.
SPEAKER_00 (17:56):
And I felt angry because...
Of course I'm a lesbian, andthere's a lot of things that,
you know, I can't just randomlyget pregnant.
But I felt angry for all womenbecause it's hurtful.
Like, why should you be takingaway...
A
SPEAKER_02 (18:12):
basic human
SPEAKER_00 (18:12):
right.
A basic human right.
SPEAKER_02 (18:14):
Especially when...
It's your own body.
Yeah.
Like if men were gettingpregnant, this would not be a
thing.
Oh, of course not.
SPEAKER_00 (18:23):
And you want us to, you know, we have human rights
and a sense of I could eatwhatever I want, I could drink
whatever I want, but yet I can'tscrew whoever I want.
Because if I do get pregnant,you're going to force me to have
something that I'm not willingto have.
And the
SPEAKER_02 (18:38):
whole no exceptions for rape or incest is beyond my
comprehension.
SPEAKER_00 (18:43):
Well, I think they said, like, within five weeks.
I think it's
SPEAKER_02 (18:46):
six.
Yeah, but still.
But, like, most people don'tknow they're pregnant.
SPEAKER_00 (18:52):
No, you don't know you're pregnant until you're
already in your, for the mostpart, when women, they don't
know they're pregnant untiltheir second trimester, and
that's already past the five tosix weeks, because you don't
know it, you don't feel it,there's nothing in your body
that really, like, it changes,but for the most part, you feel
bloated and frustrated, but youdon't know.
(19:14):
And it isn't until you take thatpregnancy test or you do those
things where you just sit thereand you're like, oh.
SPEAKER_02 (19:19):
Well, how early will those strips detect pregnancy?
Do you know?
SPEAKER_00 (19:25):
Normally.
SPEAKER_02 (19:26):
I'm sorry.
I'm really ignorant.
I sound stupid.
No.
Because I just really don'tknow.
You have different
SPEAKER_00 (19:31):
types, babe.
And you don't want to knowwhat's funny is I am gay, but I
have done a lot of research onthis because, you know, I'm a
family of seven.
And it's just a fun thing tolook at.
Like, I don't like to go toschool, but I like to learn
things.
I'm a huge learner.
And when it comes to stuff likethat, like, normally, like,
they'll have pregnancy testswhere you could do six days
before your period, or there's,like, 21 days or 27 days or
(19:55):
whatever, how many days afterthe last time you had
unprotected sex.
SPEAKER_02 (20:01):
You know, again, I'm going to sound really
ridiculous, but when you urinateon the strip...
What is it that determines theplus or negative?
It's the genome.
I'm not 100% accurate, but itmeasures whether or not you have
a baby in your tummy.
SPEAKER_00 (20:23):
What happens when it comes to making a baby, your
hormones fluctuate and they goup.
All of that type of situation,it all messes with your hormones
and that does still come out inthe pee.
That's why you're able toproject that and find out.
That's why a lot of tests areable to do it six days before
your missed period.
(20:44):
Or, like I said, 21 to 25 daysafter you had unprotected sex is
because your hormones, whenyou're pregnant, will already be
going up and down and trying tofigure all that stuff out.
SPEAKER_02 (20:58):
And there's no way, if you have your period, that
you're pregnant, right?
I don't know.
SPEAKER_00 (21:03):
Well, there's a lot of fun things on the Internet, a
lot of different misconceptionson that.
So there's—and I've—which isfunny— Because I randomly would
scroll and read this stuff.
SPEAKER_02 (21:17):
It's pertinent to your body.
SPEAKER_00 (21:18):
Yeah.
I'm a woman.
I don't have sex with men.
Like a prostate for me.
SPEAKER_02 (21:22):
Yeah.
SPEAKER_00 (21:22):
I don't have sex with men.
It's a pineapple.
But I still want to learn it.
And it's not a huge percentage,but there is a percentage of
women that do tend to haveunprotected sex, have their
period, think that they're fine,and then their next period,
they're pregnant.
SPEAKER_02 (21:40):
And then the next thing, they have a baby in the
toilet.
That's crazy.
SPEAKER_00 (21:43):
What?
Not even in the toilet.
It's more along the lines of,
SPEAKER_02 (21:46):
like...
Have you not ever heard that,like, I think I didn't know I
was pregnant?
Is that an urban legend thing?
No, I didn't know I waspregnant, and the next thing you
know, there's a baby when theythink they're going to have a
baby.
No, like, as the next thing youknow, my water just broke.
That's not true.
Yeah.
That's not true.
You've not seen that show?
I didn't know I was pregnant.
SPEAKER_00 (22:04):
Yeah, that is very true.
We're going to have to Google itand YouTube it or something.
It's more along the lines of...
Heavier set women that do dealwith that because, I mean, if
you're heavier set, you don'treally know that you're
pregnant, which, by the way, Iam a personal trainer as well,
so I know a lot of differentthings like that.
SPEAKER_02 (22:26):
That's
SPEAKER_00 (22:27):
right.
You look the way you look.
Fantastic.
Yeah.
Yeah.
I work out.
I work out.
But that is the reason why Iknow a lot of these things.
When it comes to stuff likethat, that it doesn't really
happen very often.
It's not a misconception.
It's just a very small and rarepercentage of situations
SPEAKER_02 (22:48):
that happen.
SPEAKER_00 (22:50):
It's a TLC show.
Yes, but when you put hundredsof millions of people, and then
you're like, there's at least15, you're going to put them on
the show.
SPEAKER_02 (22:58):
Well, reeling this back a little bit, I guess
another one of my questions,because of the...
Well, let me just straight upask, what stage are you at in
terms of your relationship?
Are you guys really cutting it?
I know that's personal if youdon't feel like...
SPEAKER_00 (23:16):
It's a very difficult question.
I guess because I
SPEAKER_02 (23:21):
was thinking about financially...
cutting it that requires a lotthat goes into that decision of
course separation of bankaccounts money changing her name
physical well yeah i mean youknow the cost of everything you
know all of it that's a there'sa lot anyway that's where i was
really thinking
SPEAKER_00 (23:40):
and the thing is is um we were together for a very
long time and there is nothingbad i could say we had an
amazing experience I wanted tobe the rest of my life and it
happened to be a chapter.
And that's one thing that Icould 100% vocalize is she is a
beautiful person and shedeserves the entire world.
SPEAKER_02 (24:02):
That's nice of you to
SPEAKER_00 (24:03):
say.
And the fact that, you know, itwasn't with me is okay.
And we both have to grow and wehave to heal.
We have to love and moveforward.
And we're both at that point intime where it's like, I still
love you and I will always loveyou.
but it just won't be with eachother.
And when it comes to finances,it was a little bit easy because
(24:26):
clearly we do not have children.
We don't have a house.
We don't have a whole lot.
So it was a lot easy.
I had a car, and we already tookthat off.
Like, all that is kind of set instone.
Realistically, moving forward,no, I do not believe that we
belong together.
But realistically...
(24:46):
I will always love her.
SPEAKER_02 (24:48):
But even with all that said, I mean, there are
still certain obstacles you haveto hop through, like you
mentioned earlier, like yourauto insurance, you know, et
cetera.
I mean, did you guys even havethings like wills, powers of
attorney, life insurance, thingsthat you created beneficiaries
for each other on?
SPEAKER_00 (25:06):
We did.
Fun thing.
I used to always make a jokeabout this.
I feel like.
Because I'm a barber.
I've been a barber for 10 years.
I have my own Roth accounts andcertain things like that.
And I would always make a jokewhere it's like, you know, I
could push you down the stairsand I'll get$80,000.
If you pushed me down thestairs, you'd get nothing.
(25:27):
You'd just cry.
And we would always make thatjoke because I always thought it
was really funny because I'd belike, you'd just cry.
SPEAKER_02 (25:33):
Yeah, because you never took out a policy, I'm
guessing.
SPEAKER_00 (25:36):
I agree.
She is my beneficiary still.
On all of my 401ks and Rothaccounts and stuff like that.
I have not changed that.
I have no desire to change itbecause realistically, when it
comes to, you know, it was amutual divorce.
Like I said, we both still loveeach other immensely.
(25:57):
She is a person that has been inmy life for so many years and I
have so many beautiful memoriesfor.
I don't want to...
be so drastic on a lot of thosethings.
But it will happen sooner orlater.
And I'm her beneficiary onpretty much all of her 401ks and
(26:19):
all of stuff like that, whichI'm sure will change.
Eventually.
SPEAKER_02 (26:23):
Oh, yeah, maybe when you guys meet other
SPEAKER_00 (26:26):
people.
Officially, or divorce, or
SPEAKER_02 (26:28):
anything like that.
But at this point, it's justlike, okay, this is fresh, this
is new.
Shoot, if we got divorced, thefirst thing you would do is
change your beneficiaries.
It's already not you.
What an a-hole.
What an a-hole.
Oh, my God.
It's my dog.
I need to go and revisit allthat.
UNKNOWN (26:48):
I don't know if you know this, Jerry, but it's me.
SPEAKER_02 (26:50):
Wow.
Wow.
That was in confidence, Alina.
I'm just joking.
Obviously, it's you.
Duds, you dummy.
SPEAKER_00 (27:03):
I feel like a divorce takes a while, and I
have no desire to notcommunicate and go through this
as cordially as possible.
You're
SPEAKER_02 (27:11):
being big people.
SPEAKER_00 (27:12):
Yes, we're both being adults like everyone
should be.
I don't want to look back in thenext 10 years and be like, I was
mean to the one person person Idecided to marry
SPEAKER_02 (27:22):
that's nice of you
SPEAKER_00 (27:22):
I want to look back and just continue to look at the
beautiful memories that we madebecause that's what I get to
hold with the rest of my lifelike I do not want to sit here
and say well you did this and Idid that like no
SPEAKER_02 (27:36):
wonder if she wanted your dog
SPEAKER_00 (27:38):
she did not
SPEAKER_02 (27:40):
oh okay
SPEAKER_00 (27:41):
well that was easy we both we were both very well
aware that like my dog's my dogyour dog's your dog and the cat
is mine
SPEAKER_02 (27:48):
okay
SPEAKER_00 (27:50):
And she was just like, yeah.
Don't forget
SPEAKER_02 (27:52):
the fish.
SPEAKER_00 (27:53):
I mean, the fish is mine.
Come on.
I thought the fish died.
No.
Oh, my God.
I wish they did.
SPEAKER_02 (28:00):
Why?
You don't want to take care ofthem?
Such a pain in the butt.
Oh.
Give them to Dalton.
She already did.
Oh, okay.
She gave me that fish tank.
Quick change of subjects.
You had mentioned a funny storyyou were going to say.
Is that okay?
SPEAKER_00 (28:19):
Yeah, but it's not.
It's disgusting.
This is going to
SPEAKER_02 (28:21):
be all right, dude.
Okay.
Well, I'm cool with that.
Is that dirty words in it orwhat?
Oh, no.
Not if you don't want to usethem.
Well, all right.
Well, I'm game to hear it.
SPEAKER_00 (28:33):
Okay.
So, I just recently heard astory from a friend, which...
She heard it from someone else.
Telephone.
Telephone.
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
It was just a very interestingstory where I felt like I had to
go.
Is this real?
Yes.
Who knows?
Yes.
Okay.
It's a real story.
Okay.
I love these.
And I just felt like I have totell everyone.
Okay.
(28:53):
I'm everyone.
It was so gross.
I'm everyone.
It was so disgusting.
I went.
Ew.
And I immediately went to thenext person and went, do you
want to know a new story?
That's that whole
SPEAKER_02 (29:04):
thing.
That's Olympia Dukakis.
You know, if you can't sayanything nice, come sit over by
me.
Exactly.
SPEAKER_00 (29:09):
And it was so interesting.
So a man and their husband, ahusband and their wife.
SPEAKER_01 (29:16):
Yeah.
SPEAKER_00 (29:16):
Right.
They were just hanging out oneday and it was a very nice day.
It was just chill.
And they decided to want to, youknow.
Have the deed.
Okay.
And unfortunately, they did nothave any lube.
SPEAKER_02 (29:31):
Mm-hmm.
Yes.
You spit on it.
Cuck-pooey.
Cuck-pooey.
Cuck-pooey.
Cuck-pooey, whatever.
Cuck-pooey.
SPEAKER_00 (29:39):
Cuck-pooey.
Well, anyways, move forwardabout three weeks later, she's
just sitting there foldingtowels.
And she just keeps orgasming,and she's like, I don't know
what's happening.
Like, there's nothing wrong.
Lucky girl.
Yeah, right?
You would think.
And then she was washing dishes,and then she would come, and it
was a very interesting thing.
So she finally made a phone callto the gyno because it happened
(29:59):
about 15, 16 more times.
SPEAKER_01 (30:01):
Wow.
SPEAKER_00 (30:02):
And, yeah.
And so what happened was, is,like, she went to the gyno, and
they were asking her a bunch ofquestions, and they're like,
hey, like...
What's wrong?
Like all this type of thing.
And they're like, well, I don'tknow.
I just keep orgasming.
It's making me feel veryuncomfortable because I'm just
doing daily activities.
And I'm all by myself.
Yeah, this is incorrect.
(30:23):
And when it comes to all women,I don't know if any women listen
to your podcast, but I'm sure abunch do.
They all know that's a veryuncomfortable feeling to be out
at the grocery store and all ofa sudden come.
SPEAKER_02 (30:34):
Or your child's playground.
It's that whole Harry and Sallything where you're like,
SPEAKER_01 (30:41):
ah, ah, ah, ah.
SPEAKER_02 (30:43):
I'll have what she's having.
Seven, seven, seven, like fromFriends.
SPEAKER_00 (30:47):
Exactly.
And then you're just like, Ididn't know that coffee was that
good.
It's
SPEAKER_01 (30:51):
a crazy feeling.
SPEAKER_00 (30:54):
So, yeah, so that was going on.
And the gyno literally looked upand she went, When was the last
time you had sex?
She was like, about three orfour weeks ago.
And she was like, did you useanything that wasn't lube or
anything like that?
And she was like, oh, why?
And the lady literally went,unfortunately.
(31:15):
I was having sex with myhusband, and we used mayonnaise.
SPEAKER_02 (31:18):
Oh, my gosh.
You don't make egg salad.
SPEAKER_00 (31:22):
Because we didn't have lube.
Yeah.
And, yeah.
And so that happened.
And she was like, well,unfortunately, we're going to
have to flush you out becausethe thing that is giving you
orgasms are hundreds andthousands of maggots.
SPEAKER_02 (31:37):
Oh, shit.
Oh, my.
My God.
I didn't mean to say cuss orsorry.
Oh, my God.
What?
Oh, my.
Oh.
Oh.
Oh.
The visual I just got.
I just pictured it, too.
Oh, my God.
A little lantern.
Oh, maggots.
Lord have mercy.
Maggots.
Oh, my God.
That is not real.
That's a made-up story.
SPEAKER_00 (32:00):
No, it was a real story.
And imagine the flush that theyhad to do with
SPEAKER_02 (32:05):
her.
And the antibiotics.
That cannot be true.
They needed to take a fireengine hose up there.
That cannot be true.
When you got to go pee, you'regoing to pee it out.
SPEAKER_00 (32:13):
Well, no.
What would happen is you wouldfeel like you have- You don't
pee out
SPEAKER_02 (32:15):
your vagina, baby.
SPEAKER_00 (32:16):
You do not.
But what would happen- There'sdifferent holes.
You would have gotten a yeastinfection.
You would have felt all this.
But when it comes to maggots,they eat stuff like
SPEAKER_02 (32:26):
that.
Man, I am literally speechless.
SPEAKER_00 (32:31):
She would have never gotten a yeast infection.
She would have never figuredthat stuff out because they.
eat stuff like that.
SPEAKER_02 (32:39):
I'm going to throw
SPEAKER_00 (32:44):
my face up.
She got flushed a bunch of timesand she had to take a bunch of
antibiotics.
Now she's fully recovered andshe's totally fine.
I thought that was the nastiestthing I've ever heard.
I have to tell every singleperson I meet.
SPEAKER_02 (32:58):
Yikes.
No more fun times anywhere.
No more mayonnaise.
Next time she eats potato salad,she's It's going to be like...
Who's using mayonnaise of allthings?
I guess it's greasy enough.
SPEAKER_00 (33:12):
Well, one thing that, I mean, y'all should know
is, like, women...
are naturally
SPEAKER_02 (33:18):
moist
SPEAKER_00 (33:19):
moist especially if they're turned on well and if
you want to go
SPEAKER_02 (33:22):
down there and you know
SPEAKER_00 (33:23):
exactly so it's like the fact that she wasn't turned
on that much yeah to need lubeor mayonnaise that's crazy
because i do not need that wheni'm turned on i'm a fucking fire
hydrant like i don't need that
SPEAKER_02 (33:40):
So
SPEAKER_00 (33:41):
it's a very interesting thing to think
about.
You
SPEAKER_02 (33:44):
don't even know how
SPEAKER_00 (33:45):
to.
Also, like, you're welcome.
SPEAKER_02 (33:47):
All I can say is I'm glad I'm not a lady.
Sorry.
I mean, sometimes we can dressup as them.
SPEAKER_00 (33:54):
Yeah, but I'm not going to end up with.
But we do orgasm more thany'all.
Oh, yeah.
Lucky you.
SPEAKER_02 (34:00):
Okay.
Lucky you.
One positive, but it's still aswampy cave.
Oh, my Lord have mercy.
Well, I'm not.
No.
SPEAKER_01 (34:10):
No.
You said you wanted to know thestory, Jerry.
Yes.
SPEAKER_02 (34:12):
Oh, my God.
No, he doesn't.
Yeah.
Well, if you were listening tothis podcast for financial
advice, you didn't get any.
We didn't do it today.
It's not today.
All you learned is don't usemayo.
And all you learned is, yeah,don't do mayo.
Or see your guy on a moreregular basis.
(34:33):
And we're just having abeautiful afternoon on a Monday.
Yeah.
For sure.
For sure.
Well, Melina, it was anexperience, a very pleasant one.
Until the end.
No, even the end.
I didn't care.
I didn't expect that, but that'sokay.
I would never have ever in mywildest dreams come across that
(34:55):
and...
Thought that was a thing.
Now you're going to Google it,aren't you?
SPEAKER_00 (34:58):
No, I'm not.
I had an amazing time.
Thank you so much for having meon your podcast.
SPEAKER_02 (35:04):
Well, and I'm sorry if we got too personal with you,
you know, but I think real lifeexperiences help other people
who, you know.
Might be going through some of
SPEAKER_00 (35:13):
the same things.
Yeah, yeah.
I'm definitely an open book.
I will never go out of my wayand say that's too much.
It's exactly what you said.
Everyone deals with it andeveryone's going through a lot
of different things and if Icould help anybody then that's a
good thing.
SPEAKER_02 (35:30):
You don't know who you're helping.
SPEAKER_00 (35:32):
Exactly.
SPEAKER_02 (35:32):
Especially when it comes to mutual divorce.
Do you know what I mean?
And mutually exclusiveness.
And I guess communication was agood key on y'all's part because
you communicated about it versusjust throwing papers in her
face.
Do you know what
SPEAKER_00 (35:47):
I mean?
And it's because realisticallywe still both love each other
and we both deserve the samerespect.
And I would never disrespect herin that way.
And that's something that not alot of people could go through
I've heard a lot of differentdivorce conversations where it
was like very rude and I stillhate her and it's been 10 years
(36:08):
and it's just a very interestingthing and that's something that
I'll never do because it's likeit's it's a person that I once
loved I will never hate her
SPEAKER_02 (36:16):
can you quickly talk about your you mentioned your
last day if you will I don'tknow if you want to call it your
last day but the day you guyssort of spent together so I
thought that was sweet
SPEAKER_00 (36:28):
Yeah, the last day was very lovely.
We had a three-hour phone call,and it was very sad.
There was a lot of crying, andthere was a lot of understanding
that we both need to grow andheal, and it just won't be
together.
And so something that I broughtup was, well, can I see you
again?
And we will have a good firstand last day.
(36:51):
And so we went to a restaurantthat actually we got our
marriage license in.
We got to that restaurant.
We ate food.
We went to Central Market.
We went to a couple of otherstores.
And it just felt normal andblissful because we've been
together for so long.
It was just a nice, peacefulday.
And it was something that I feellike we both needed at that
(37:13):
point in time.
And To move forward like weknew.
Just because we need to grow andheal separately doesn't mean we
still don't care about eachother.
SPEAKER_02 (37:22):
That's super, super sweet.
I don't know if I'd be thatsweet.
SPEAKER_00 (37:26):
I don't think you would.
SPEAKER_02 (37:30):
Yeah.
SPEAKER_00 (37:30):
But it's something that I wanted to
SPEAKER_02 (37:32):
do.
Yes, you would.
No, I'm not.
SPEAKER_00 (37:34):
It's something that I wanted to do to grow and, like
I said, grow and heal.
And just because we didn't endup together the way we thought
doesn't mean it's...
Forever going to be the worstthing in the world.
SPEAKER_02 (37:46):
And you never know.
You never know down the road.
You guys are young.
When you get to my age, you kindof let bygones be bygones in a
lot of ways for a lot of people.
Not everybody, but a lot ofpeople.
You
SPEAKER_00 (37:59):
let it go.
And I'm the type of person thatI believe in karma.
And I always want to push...
Even in bad situations, I alwayswant to find optimistic
situations.
And I always want to be the bestperson that I can be, even in
bad situations.
And that's just where I'm atright now in my life.
And I'm okay with that.
And I feel like I'm healing andI'm growing.
(38:21):
And that's all you can reallyask out of life itself.
SPEAKER_02 (38:24):
There you go.
I agree.
I agree, hon.
So thank you both for beinghere.
I really enjoyed it.
I really learned something,believe it or not.
What?
Don't use mayonnaise?
Beyond that, beyond that, yes.
I really didn't know.
I'm not even going to say it.
I'm not going
SPEAKER_00 (38:44):
to say it.
I think we all learned don't usemayonnaise.
I think
SPEAKER_02 (38:47):
that's a life lesson.
If you take any money besidesfinancial advice, don't use
mayonnaise.
Yikes.
All right, bye.
All right, well, thank you allfor joining us today and have a
great day.
Let's party.
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