September 19, 2024 • 26 mins
How would your life change if you truly honoured every moment? Join me, Steph, your Mojo Maven, as we embark on an exceptional journey to transform our relationship with time. Our mantra of the week, "I honour my time by being present," sets the stage for a powerful exploration into the preciousness of the now. I'll share heartfelt personal stories, including the profound loss of my vibrant mother in 2021, which completely reshaped my understanding of time and led me to reclaim it for my own healing. We'll reflect on how being mindful and fully engaged in each moment can enrich our lives and help us serve others more effectively.
Ever felt like you're running on empty, constantly working but never truly living? In this episode, we confront the harsh realities of burnout and the critical need to reclaim our personal time. Hear about my own relentless work habits and the eye-opening moment when my workaholic mentor's personal tragedy underscored the importance of making time for oneself. By reassessing our routines and aligning them with our core values, we can create a life filled with meaningful activities and connections. Tune in to discover how to act with intention and make every moment count, ensuring your time is spent honoring who you truly are.
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Transcript
Episode Transcript
Available transcripts are automatically generated. Complete accuracy is not guaranteed.
Speaker 1 (00:10):
Welcome to Pocketful of Mojo, where you're, you and
I'm, steph, and we tune in hereto tap into some mojo.
Well, what do you mean?
What's mojo?
You know, mojo is that feelingof unshakable confidence, that
booming self-worth.
Like you're an unstoppableforce of nature.
You know that feeling you getthat makes you want to strut
(00:32):
like a 90s supermodel.
That's the one, and I'm here toshow you how you can have that
feeling every single day.
You see, I think I've crackedthe code to being happy.
I'm happy all the freaking time, like every day, possibly to an
annoying degree, but I wasn'talways this way.
And not to flex, but I've hadbreakdowns on multiple
(00:55):
continents and in two languages.
But by paying attention and byliving with more intention, I've
created this self-love firstaid kit, and it's full of
amazing tools that help me levelup and navigate life with that
main character energy everyone'stalking about.
And I'm not here to gatekeep.
In fact, I'm on a mission tohelp you tap into your best
(01:18):
stuff and remember that you haveeverything you need to live
your life on your own terms.
So settle in.
We're here for some positivechange.
So let's dig in to where yourmojo meets the road.
In today's episode, I'm going toreview the mantra for the week
and then we're going to dig intotoday's main topic, and that
(01:39):
topic is time.
But, plot twist, we are takingit on the road once again and
shaking things up.
So you stick around and I'mgoing to make sure that you're
glad that you did.
Let's get started with today'smantra and get tuned in, tapped
in and turned on.
Hello, hello, hello.
(02:11):
You're looking good today.
And welcome to the 35th episodeof Pocketful of Mojo.
Once again, I'm Steph, I'm yourMojo Maven, I'm your soul
sister, I'm your emotionalSherpa, and I'm so glad you're
here.
I'm here to reflect yourawesomeness and your potential
back to you.
I'm here to reflect yourawesomeness and your potential
back to you.
So let's settle in.
Let's start by digging intotoday's mantra, and today's
mantra is I honor my time bybeing present.
(02:34):
Wow, okay, this has the powerof like five mantras Amazing.
Okay, let's get into it.
I honor my time by beingpresent.
Let's get into it.
I honor my time by beingpresent.
When we honor our time, weacknowledge our relationship to
it, we establish it as afavorable one, where we work
(02:54):
together in harmony and withrespect, because time is
freaking expensive.
Like when they said time ismoney.
I think they underestimated howtrue that really is, and not
necessarily for the reasons thatyou think Time is one of the
few things on earth that wecan't buy.
We can't add time, we can'tspeed it up and we can't slow it
(03:16):
down, and the headline here iswe don't know how much time we
have.
So time is to be honored.
We need to act accordingly.
I honor my time by beingpresent.
When we're present, this meansfully being in the moment that
you're in and nowhere else.
That's where we're truly living, because we are here on earth
(03:40):
for two reasons, in my opinionOne is to experience and the
other is to serve.
And when we drop into the now,into this moment, we are
fulfilling this mission toexperience this life.
And when we fall into the trapof living in the past or
worrying about the future, weare stealing from ourselves.
We are robbing ourselves ofthis amazing, never seen before.
(04:02):
We are robbing ourselves ofthis amazing, never seen before,
one time only, special editionmoment that we will never see
again.
When we drop this mantra, weshift out of the past and out of
the future and settle in thenow.
This is where all the richesare found and we are safe and we
are whole.
No anxiety, no regret.
(04:30):
I honor my time by being present.
Now you can be in the room and,at the same time, be nowhere to
be seen.
Have you ever been with someonewho's there but not actually
there?
They're ruminating on thatthing that happened this morning
or blankly staring at you, butyou know full well that they're
just waiting for their turn totalk and simply waiting for
their cue.
That is the dark side of time,when it pulls us into the past
(04:52):
and projecting from theimagination of all that could
happen in the future, all whiledistracting our experience from
the power of now.
Now, to combat this, yoursecret weapon is the one that
you're born with, and that'sawareness.
With the power of mindfulnessand awareness, we can actively
drop into the present momentanytime we want, simply by
(05:15):
tuning into our awareness andpulling ourselves and our
thoughts and our experience backinto the now, this moment.
It's truly and really the onlything that exists.
I honor my time by being present.
So often we make plans forourselves and we like to think
(05:36):
that we do so intentionally.
Then, when the moment comes todo the thing we planned, we take
ourselves out of the moment andfocus on what was or what will
be.
But when we honor our time, weare acting with intention.
When we honor our time, we arefully committed, present,
engaged, tuned in, tapped in,turned on, and we're squeezing
(05:58):
all the juice we can out of theexperiences that we create for
ourselves.
That's why we're here.
Going through the motions won'tscore you any points and it
won't fill your cup.
I honor my time by beingpresent.
Okay, now, that was a mantra.
(06:24):
I hope you feel grounded andempowered to renegotiate your
relationship with time in a waythat makes you feel like you're
at the helm.
You are flying the plane, youare the conductor that is
driving this experience in allthe ways that fill your cup and
keep you tuned in to themagnificent creature that you
(06:44):
are, instead of just goingthrough the motions.
Time is here to remind us thatnot only this, too, shall pass,
but that we only get one kick atthe can, unless you believe in
reincarnation.
But we'll save that rabbit holefor another episode, shall we?
Our time on earth is shorterthan we think and we are not
guaranteed our tomorrow, so letthis episode be a reminder to
(07:09):
not take a single second forgranted because, my lovelies,
everything can change in aninstant, maybe for the better,
maybe for the worse, and maybeit'll just be change, but that's
all part of this amazing ride.
So much is out of our control,and while that can be freaky and
super scary, I'm here to helpyou rebrand it as being a
(07:31):
concept that is liberating,freeing and empowering.
You are here to do what you arehere to do.
No one else can tell you whatthat is, but the more you know
yourself, the more you will knowwhat to do with your time.
It's when we look around to seewhat other people are doing
with their time that we end upgetting ourselves in trouble.
(07:53):
Okay, okay, okay.
Let's not let another momentpass before we take this convo
on the road and check in withour correspondent on the clock.
That's right on the road.
And check in with ourcorrespondent on the clock.
That's right.
We are going deep on the topicof time in a way that allows me
to get off script and Talk toyou from the heart, with a lapel
mic and a tank of gas.
So here we go.
(08:15):
This is Mojo on the Road.
Okie, dokie, here we go.
(08:42):
Let the rattling begin.
Oh my gosh, this car is so old.
Welcome back, ladies andgentlemen and everyone in
between.
Oh, this man, the female man.
Oh my gosh, why is everythingrattling?
We're doing it.
We're gonna talk about time.
We're going on the road.
(09:03):
I'm actually on my way to see mybestie at must have pockets.
You may remember leanne from acouple episodes ago.
Oh man, she's great, and Ihaven't seen her since Saturday.
It feels like forever.
And I'm going to take you withme and we're going to talk about
time.
Do I want to go to theuniversity?
(09:25):
Let's go through the university.
Does anybody else feel likethey just woke up and boom, it's
fall, like there's leaves onthe ground and I don't really
know.
I feel like it like this yearis just blowing by and today
we're talking about time andtime is whack.
That is my mission statementfor today and I got a lot to
(09:48):
unpack here about time, becauseI my relationship with time
really changed and I've gleanedso much from changing my
relationship with time that Ireally want to dig into it with
you today.
So that's what we're going todo and we're going to do it on
(10:09):
the road.
So when we're talking about time, so my relationship with time
changed when my mom died.
So there she was, 77 years old,healthy as a horse, living her
life.
It's 2021.
(10:31):
And she's like a healthy lady.
She was on, I think, onemedication for blood pressure,
but other than that, just doingwell.
And that day she got up, shedid the crossword, she met with
her best friend for coffee um,which is really interesting
(10:53):
because her best friend is mybest friend's mom and in
speaking with Jen she wasn'tgoing to go.
She was like, oh, I just camefrom the gym, I don't feel super
great, like I'll put it off orI'll reschedule, but she pulled
it together and she went for thecoffee with my mom and, of
course, my mom got like alldressed up and she put on her
(11:14):
jewelry.
And she went for the coffeewith my mom and, of course, my
mom got like all dressed up andshe put on her jewelry and she
just like looked fabulous.
And then, you know, she camehome and did her thing and made
meatloaf for dinner and then shewas feeling kind of tired, so
she laid down to take a nap andshe didn't wake up.
(11:35):
And I was living in France atthe time and I woke up to a
phone call from my brother whohad the horrible job of telling
me that, out of absolutelynowhere, my mom was gone and it
was like being hit by a truck.
(11:55):
Nothing made sense.
Nothing made sense and timebecame really weird.
And I don't mean like, oh, theday's been flying by, like more
than that.
It felt like months, took years, days took lifetimes.
(12:16):
Yesterday feels like fiveminutes ago and last week feels
like 10 years ago.
So it's perception, it's how weengage with it, but time seemed
to be standing still and flyingat the same time and it just
none of it made sense.
And I mean, don't get me wrong,I love time.
(12:40):
I'm a very organized person.
I used to actually teach aworkshop on time management and
time mastery, so I loveorganization, I love being on
time.
My brother's got a great sayinghe's like if I'm not 15 minutes
early, I'm 10 minutes late, andyou know I really respect time.
(13:00):
So having this relationshipwith it completely blow up
really kind of put me in a placewhere I could look at time
differently.
Look at time differently.
(13:21):
So after my mom passed, I'm I'mliving in France I'm trying to
get heads or tails of what isthis fucking life and why is
this happening?
How is this happening?
What do I do?
How do I do it?
And so I get on a plane andthis is very like this is middle
of 2021.
So it's pandemic, it's.
You know, I'm coming intoCanada but my vaccines were
(13:45):
French.
So how do I prove that?
And do I need to quarantine?
And you know how many peoplecan we have at the funeral?
And logistically it was cuckoobananas.
And then I came back to Canadaand I was here for about six
weeks and we had the funeral andI just felt like I was walking
(14:08):
through life like a zombie andall of the constructs and
systems had all just kind ofburned to the ground.
And I may add that I was alsoin the process of separating
from my husband of 10 years.
So my life was kind of adumpster fire and time wasn't
(14:31):
helping because it was.
Everything just seemedmeaningless.
And when I saw, when I was homefor those six weeks, I came
home and I spent some reallyamazing time, kind of trauma,
bonding with my brothers who Ihadn't seen in years and we
(14:54):
actually became really closethrough through our grieving and
then, and then I saw themhaving to go back to work and I
was just like what, like I mymother's death hit myself and my
two brothers very differently,and I learned that we had very
(15:14):
different parents.
I'm six and eight years youngerthan my brothers and we all had
very different relationshipswith our mom and had very
different childhoods and verydifferent experiences with
growing up.
But watching them having to goback to work and function, and
(15:37):
because their bereavement timehad dried up and so it's time to
go back to work, it's time tocontinue to forge on with life,
and I just didn't have thatcapacity.
I was just incapable ofrallying myself to a point where
I could function, and so I didsomething kind of brave, kind of
(16:01):
stupid I decided to pay myselfwith time.
I didn't make any money, Ididn't show up anywhere every
day to make somebody else'sdreams come true.
I had to go back and invest mytime back into myself, and that
allowed me to really release myrelationship with time, because
(16:24):
I wasn't.
I took myself off the clock.
I took myself off of any kindof notion, expectation that I
had to be a certain thing by acertain time, because all bets
were off.
Nothing made sense anymore.
I didn't have any of theingredients to actually be like
(16:46):
productive or contribute in anyway because I was completely
scrambled.
So by interrogating the rules,I was able to change the game.
And I see now that when Ichanged my relationship with
time, I changed my life, and sowhen I started seeing time as a
currency, I was able to reallytune into myself and decide how
(17:12):
do I want to spend my time.
And we use the word spend withtime and with money, and time is
one of those things that wecan't buy.
We can't speed it up, we can'tslow it down.
So I just renegotiated my deal.
I renegotiated my deal withtime and I made it work for me.
Now that doesn't mean that Iwas super productive.
(17:34):
It means that if I felt likecrying, I would cry, and
sometimes that would last ashort amount of time and
sometimes it would last allfucking day.
But I didn't put any.
I took away any kind ofbarriers or expectations on what
it should look like and howquickly that should wrap up,
because I was making sure thattime was working with me and for
(17:59):
me, because I know really wellwhat happens when you're a slave
to time, when you do thingsbefore you should or when you do
things on someone else's time.
I am no stranger to burnout.
I was the one when I wasworking in my job at Starbucks,
where I would go in early, Iwould stay late, I would do
emails through my lunch break ifI even took one and as a result
(18:24):
, I didn't have any of my owngoals and instead I had a shit
ton of resentment because I hada husband who had time freedom
and that time freedom was so theopposite of the life that I was
living that it just startedbuilding this huge mountain of
resentment Because I was makingsomeone else's dreams come true.
(18:45):
But don't get me wrongResponsibilities are still super
important.
This isn't about blowing upyour life or cutting ties with
all of your responsibilities androles that you play in your
life and in other people's lives.
Those things are still key andstill important.
But how we show up while we'reexecuting these responsibilities
(19:08):
is a direct result of how muchtime you spend with yourself and
what kind of time you spendwith yourself, because, remember
, you're in charge and this isall made up.
We're all out here making it up.
This moment right here is anever before seen moment that we
(19:30):
will never see again, and weare so rich with time and every
day that you get to wake up onthis side of the pavement is a
gift, because if losing my momtaught me anything, it's that
everything can change in aninstant.
We are not promised tomorrow.
(19:51):
And it makes me think of when Iwas, like at the peak of my
hustledom in the Starbucks worldand I was really gunning for
the next promotion and I, like Ichanged cities and I sacrificed
a lot of my wellness in orderto achieve these business
results, in order to get the job, and, like my mentor and the
(20:14):
person who is in charge ofpotentially hiring me for this
job was a total workaholic, I'mtalking.
I would wake up at five o'clockin the morning and I would
already have two emails from herasking me what my results were
for the next day and what I wasgonna do differently today to
impact those results.
Like she was hardcore.
And then there was this realaha moment when I got an email
(20:38):
on Friday morning and she justsaid hey guys, I'm going to be
off the grid.
I just found out that my bestchildhood friend died and I just
can't deal today.
I just can't deal today.
And it was that moment wherehumanity met business and she
(20:58):
made time.
She made time for herself,because you can always make time
.
We all have the same 24 hours,and that saying used to really
piss me off, because we don'tall have the same resources, the
same education, the sameprivilege, the same anything.
We're all unique, but we do allhave the same resources, the
same education, the sameprivilege, the same anything.
We're all unique, but we do allhave the same 24 hours.
(21:20):
So when you think about how wespend it back to that money
analogy you know, if you had allthe money in the world, how
would you spend it If you had afinite, and how would that be
different than if you had afinite amount of money?
So when you think about time, Iwant you to think about what
(21:41):
would you do if you had moretime?
And just start there, becausewhat that does is that opens up
the door for you to startinterrogating and figuring out
where do I like to spend my time, what is in tune with where my
time should be spent?
Look, we've all bought thatthing that we didn't really need
(22:03):
, but wanted to buy it anyway,and we've all spent our time
doing something that may not bein alignment with our best goals
, and maybe more, I don't know,playing candy crush or something
like that, but it does begrepeating that you can do
anything but you can't doeverything.
(22:24):
So that's where we're able toreally dial in tune into what we
really want and align ourschedules to reflect more of who
we are.
Back to us.
So as we go ahead and weinterrogate our habits and our
routines, we can say, look, isthis something that I'm doing
for the sake of doing it?
Go ahead and we interrogate ourhabits and our routines, we can
say, look, is this somethingthat I'm doing for the sake of
doing it?
Is this something that I'mdoing because it's what I've
(22:46):
always done and what are thethings I wish I could do with my
time?
And then what the brain does isit starts solving that problem.
It starts creating littlecracks and crevices where we can
start to pull that thread andthen, all of a sudden, our lives
will start to transform.
So as you move ahead and youstart looking at time and if you
(23:09):
feel like you're chasing afterit, you have an amazing
opportunity to flip the script.
Put yourself back in that pilotseat and start designing the
life and the schedule that isreally a reflection of you and
your goals and your values andyour dreams, and it's filled
with people that you love andit's filled with conversations
(23:30):
that light you up and it bringsyou to rooms that help you reach
for that next level in yourlife, because it's not about
blowing up your life and, heavenforbid, something happens to
you that gives you the whiplashlike I got.
That prompted me to think aboutthings in this way.
Good news is, you've got thispodcast and this is your cue and
(23:51):
your invitation to just take abeat and think about what are
some things that I can let go of, to make space for things that
truly align with me, that makespace for things that make me
feel good, because those thingsripple into every other thing
that you do.
Oh man, I feel like I couldtalk about this for absolutely
(24:12):
ever, so I'm going to wrap thisup.
For now I'm going to shoot itback to the studio where we're
going to wrap up this week'sepisode, but absolutely thrilled
that you tuned in here today.
Anyway, without further ado,thank you for tuning in.
You're gorgeous, keep up.
Keep it up, cutie.
Stay fabulous, love you.
(24:34):
And that was Pocketful of MojoRoad Trip Edition.
(24:56):
Tune in next week to see if wedo it again.
But seriously, thanks fortuning in and I hope that this
has helped you tap into some ofthat mojo of yours, because
you're worth a baby.
Next week, we're going to diginto the business of mojo and
how to take that fabulousfeeling and infuse it into
everything you do, includingyour work.
(25:19):
You, with me, tune in next weekas we figure out all the nuts
and bolts of it all and in themeantime, if you feel like your
mojo could use a tune-up, I'vecome up with lots of ways that
we can do this again sometime.
Make sure you take a coupleminutes to subscribe to this
podcast and extra good, juju, ifyou leave a review, you can
follow me on Instagram atmoststefinitely for daily
(25:42):
mantras, affirmations, and besure to show your love with all
the likes and comments.
I am a recovering peoplepleaser, so you know it means
the world when you do.
Now.
You found me at the verybeginning of All Things Mojo,
and there's so much more on theway.
All the cool links are easilyfound in the show notes, so go
have a look, because you're hereanyway, and, while you're at it
(26:03):
, share this episode with afriend.
It's not only good karma, butit will give you two something
to talk about when you go foryour next little mental health
walk together.
So I'm just getting warmed uphere and I've got so much great
stuff to share with you guys.
So be sure to tune in next weekand until then, stay classy,
(26:26):
stay kind and put love ineverything you do.
Ciao for now.
Welcome to Pocketful of Mojo, where you're, you and
I'm, steph, and we tune in hereto tap into some mojo.
Well, what do you mean?
What's mojo?
You know, mojo is that feelingof unshakable confidence, that
booming self-worth.
Like you're an unstoppableforce of nature.
You know that feeling you getthat makes you want to strut
(00:32):
like a 90s supermodel.
That's the one, and I'm here toshow you how you can have that
feeling every single day.
You see, I think I've crackedthe code to being happy.
I'm happy all the freaking time, like every day, possibly to an
annoying degree, but I wasn'talways this way.
And not to flex, but I've hadbreakdowns on multiple
(00:55):
continents and in two languages.
But by paying attention and byliving with more intention, I've
created this self-love firstaid kit, and it's full of
amazing tools that help me levelup and navigate life with that
main character energy everyone'stalking about.
And I'm not here to gatekeep.
In fact, I'm on a mission tohelp you tap into your best
(01:18):
stuff and remember that you haveeverything you need to live
your life on your own terms.
So settle in.
We're here for some positivechange.
So let's dig in to where yourmojo meets the road.
In today's episode, I'm going toreview the mantra for the week
and then we're going to dig intotoday's main topic, and that
(01:39):
topic is time.
But, plot twist, we are takingit on the road once again and
shaking things up.
So you stick around and I'mgoing to make sure that you're
glad that you did.
Let's get started with today'smantra and get tuned in, tapped
in and turned on.
Hello, hello, hello.
(02:11):
You're looking good today.
And welcome to the 35th episodeof Pocketful of Mojo.
Once again, I'm Steph, I'm yourMojo Maven, I'm your soul
sister, I'm your emotionalSherpa, and I'm so glad you're
here.
I'm here to reflect yourawesomeness and your potential
back to you.
I'm here to reflect yourawesomeness and your potential
back to you.
So let's settle in.
Let's start by digging intotoday's mantra, and today's
mantra is I honor my time bybeing present.
(02:34):
Wow, okay, this has the powerof like five mantras Amazing.
Okay, let's get into it.
I honor my time by beingpresent.
Let's get into it.
I honor my time by beingpresent.
When we honor our time, weacknowledge our relationship to
it, we establish it as afavorable one, where we work
(02:54):
together in harmony and withrespect, because time is
freaking expensive.
Like when they said time ismoney.
I think they underestimated howtrue that really is, and not
necessarily for the reasons thatyou think Time is one of the
few things on earth that wecan't buy.
We can't add time, we can'tspeed it up and we can't slow it
(03:16):
down, and the headline here iswe don't know how much time we
have.
So time is to be honored.
We need to act accordingly.
I honor my time by beingpresent.
When we're present, this meansfully being in the moment that
you're in and nowhere else.
That's where we're truly living, because we are here on earth
(03:40):
for two reasons, in my opinionOne is to experience and the
other is to serve.
And when we drop into the now,into this moment, we are
fulfilling this mission toexperience this life.
And when we fall into the trapof living in the past or
worrying about the future, weare stealing from ourselves.
We are robbing ourselves ofthis amazing, never seen before.
(04:02):
We are robbing ourselves ofthis amazing, never seen before,
one time only, special editionmoment that we will never see
again.
When we drop this mantra, weshift out of the past and out of
the future and settle in thenow.
This is where all the richesare found and we are safe and we
are whole.
No anxiety, no regret.
(04:30):
I honor my time by being present.
Now you can be in the room and,at the same time, be nowhere to
be seen.
Have you ever been with someonewho's there but not actually
there?
They're ruminating on thatthing that happened this morning
or blankly staring at you, butyou know full well that they're
just waiting for their turn totalk and simply waiting for
their cue.
That is the dark side of time,when it pulls us into the past
(04:52):
and projecting from theimagination of all that could
happen in the future, all whiledistracting our experience from
the power of now.
Now, to combat this, yoursecret weapon is the one that
you're born with, and that'sawareness.
With the power of mindfulnessand awareness, we can actively
drop into the present momentanytime we want, simply by
(05:15):
tuning into our awareness andpulling ourselves and our
thoughts and our experience backinto the now, this moment.
It's truly and really the onlything that exists.
I honor my time by being present.
So often we make plans forourselves and we like to think
(05:36):
that we do so intentionally.
Then, when the moment comes todo the thing we planned, we take
ourselves out of the moment andfocus on what was or what will
be.
But when we honor our time, weare acting with intention.
When we honor our time, we arefully committed, present,
engaged, tuned in, tapped in,turned on, and we're squeezing
(05:58):
all the juice we can out of theexperiences that we create for
ourselves.
That's why we're here.
Going through the motions won'tscore you any points and it
won't fill your cup.
I honor my time by beingpresent.
Okay, now, that was a mantra.
(06:24):
I hope you feel grounded andempowered to renegotiate your
relationship with time in a waythat makes you feel like you're
at the helm.
You are flying the plane, youare the conductor that is
driving this experience in allthe ways that fill your cup and
keep you tuned in to themagnificent creature that you
(06:44):
are, instead of just goingthrough the motions.
Time is here to remind us thatnot only this, too, shall pass,
but that we only get one kick atthe can, unless you believe in
reincarnation.
But we'll save that rabbit holefor another episode, shall we?
Our time on earth is shorterthan we think and we are not
guaranteed our tomorrow, so letthis episode be a reminder to
(07:09):
not take a single second forgranted because, my lovelies,
everything can change in aninstant, maybe for the better,
maybe for the worse, and maybeit'll just be change, but that's
all part of this amazing ride.
So much is out of our control,and while that can be freaky and
super scary, I'm here to helpyou rebrand it as being a
(07:31):
concept that is liberating,freeing and empowering.
You are here to do what you arehere to do.
No one else can tell you whatthat is, but the more you know
yourself, the more you will knowwhat to do with your time.
It's when we look around to seewhat other people are doing
with their time that we end upgetting ourselves in trouble.
(07:53):
Okay, okay, okay.
Let's not let another momentpass before we take this convo
on the road and check in withour correspondent on the clock.
That's right on the road.
And check in with ourcorrespondent on the clock.
That's right.
We are going deep on the topicof time in a way that allows me
to get off script and Talk toyou from the heart, with a lapel
mic and a tank of gas.
So here we go.
(08:15):
This is Mojo on the Road.
Okie, dokie, here we go.
(08:42):
Let the rattling begin.
Oh my gosh, this car is so old.
Welcome back, ladies andgentlemen and everyone in
between.
Oh, this man, the female man.
Oh my gosh, why is everythingrattling?
We're doing it.
We're gonna talk about time.
We're going on the road.
(09:03):
I'm actually on my way to see mybestie at must have pockets.
You may remember leanne from acouple episodes ago.
Oh man, she's great, and Ihaven't seen her since Saturday.
It feels like forever.
And I'm going to take you withme and we're going to talk about
time.
Do I want to go to theuniversity?
(09:25):
Let's go through the university.
Does anybody else feel likethey just woke up and boom, it's
fall, like there's leaves onthe ground and I don't really
know.
I feel like it like this yearis just blowing by and today
we're talking about time andtime is whack.
That is my mission statementfor today and I got a lot to
(09:48):
unpack here about time, becauseI my relationship with time
really changed and I've gleanedso much from changing my
relationship with time that Ireally want to dig into it with
you today.
So that's what we're going todo and we're going to do it on
(10:09):
the road.
So when we're talking about time, so my relationship with time
changed when my mom died.
So there she was, 77 years old,healthy as a horse, living her
life.
It's 2021.
(10:31):
And she's like a healthy lady.
She was on, I think, onemedication for blood pressure,
but other than that, just doingwell.
And that day she got up, shedid the crossword, she met with
her best friend for coffee um,which is really interesting
(10:53):
because her best friend is mybest friend's mom and in
speaking with Jen she wasn'tgoing to go.
She was like, oh, I just camefrom the gym, I don't feel super
great, like I'll put it off orI'll reschedule, but she pulled
it together and she went for thecoffee with my mom and, of
course, my mom got like alldressed up and she put on her
(11:14):
jewelry.
And she went for the coffeewith my mom and, of course, my
mom got like all dressed up andshe put on her jewelry and she
just like looked fabulous.
And then, you know, she camehome and did her thing and made
meatloaf for dinner and then shewas feeling kind of tired, so
she laid down to take a nap andshe didn't wake up.
(11:35):
And I was living in France atthe time and I woke up to a
phone call from my brother whohad the horrible job of telling
me that, out of absolutelynowhere, my mom was gone and it
was like being hit by a truck.
(11:55):
Nothing made sense.
Nothing made sense and timebecame really weird.
And I don't mean like, oh, theday's been flying by, like more
than that.
It felt like months, took years, days took lifetimes.
(12:16):
Yesterday feels like fiveminutes ago and last week feels
like 10 years ago.
So it's perception, it's how weengage with it, but time seemed
to be standing still and flyingat the same time and it just
none of it made sense.
And I mean, don't get me wrong,I love time.
(12:40):
I'm a very organized person.
I used to actually teach aworkshop on time management and
time mastery, so I loveorganization, I love being on
time.
My brother's got a great sayinghe's like if I'm not 15 minutes
early, I'm 10 minutes late, andyou know I really respect time.
(13:00):
So having this relationshipwith it completely blow up
really kind of put me in a placewhere I could look at time
differently.
Look at time differently.
(13:21):
So after my mom passed, I'm I'mliving in France I'm trying to
get heads or tails of what isthis fucking life and why is
this happening?
How is this happening?
What do I do?
How do I do it?
And so I get on a plane andthis is very like this is middle
of 2021.
So it's pandemic, it's.
You know, I'm coming intoCanada but my vaccines were
(13:45):
French.
So how do I prove that?
And do I need to quarantine?
And you know how many peoplecan we have at the funeral?
And logistically it was cuckoobananas.
And then I came back to Canadaand I was here for about six
weeks and we had the funeral andI just felt like I was walking
(14:08):
through life like a zombie andall of the constructs and
systems had all just kind ofburned to the ground.
And I may add that I was alsoin the process of separating
from my husband of 10 years.
So my life was kind of adumpster fire and time wasn't
(14:31):
helping because it was.
Everything just seemedmeaningless.
And when I saw, when I was homefor those six weeks, I came
home and I spent some reallyamazing time, kind of trauma,
bonding with my brothers who Ihadn't seen in years and we
(14:54):
actually became really closethrough through our grieving and
then, and then I saw themhaving to go back to work and I
was just like what, like I mymother's death hit myself and my
two brothers very differently,and I learned that we had very
(15:14):
different parents.
I'm six and eight years youngerthan my brothers and we all had
very different relationshipswith our mom and had very
different childhoods and verydifferent experiences with
growing up.
But watching them having to goback to work and function, and
(15:37):
because their bereavement timehad dried up and so it's time to
go back to work, it's time tocontinue to forge on with life,
and I just didn't have thatcapacity.
I was just incapable ofrallying myself to a point where
I could function, and so I didsomething kind of brave, kind of
(16:01):
stupid I decided to pay myselfwith time.
I didn't make any money, Ididn't show up anywhere every
day to make somebody else'sdreams come true.
I had to go back and invest mytime back into myself, and that
allowed me to really release myrelationship with time, because
(16:24):
I wasn't.
I took myself off the clock.
I took myself off of any kindof notion, expectation that I
had to be a certain thing by acertain time, because all bets
were off.
Nothing made sense anymore.
I didn't have any of theingredients to actually be like
(16:46):
productive or contribute in anyway because I was completely
scrambled.
So by interrogating the rules,I was able to change the game.
And I see now that when Ichanged my relationship with
time, I changed my life, and sowhen I started seeing time as a
currency, I was able to reallytune into myself and decide how
(17:12):
do I want to spend my time.
And we use the word spend withtime and with money, and time is
one of those things that wecan't buy.
We can't speed it up, we can'tslow it down.
So I just renegotiated my deal.
I renegotiated my deal withtime and I made it work for me.
Now that doesn't mean that Iwas super productive.
(17:34):
It means that if I felt likecrying, I would cry, and
sometimes that would last ashort amount of time and
sometimes it would last allfucking day.
But I didn't put any.
I took away any kind ofbarriers or expectations on what
it should look like and howquickly that should wrap up,
because I was making sure thattime was working with me and for
(17:59):
me, because I know really wellwhat happens when you're a slave
to time, when you do thingsbefore you should or when you do
things on someone else's time.
I am no stranger to burnout.
I was the one when I wasworking in my job at Starbucks,
where I would go in early, Iwould stay late, I would do
emails through my lunch break ifI even took one and as a result
(18:24):
, I didn't have any of my owngoals and instead I had a shit
ton of resentment because I hada husband who had time freedom
and that time freedom was so theopposite of the life that I was
living that it just startedbuilding this huge mountain of
resentment Because I was makingsomeone else's dreams come true.
(18:45):
But don't get me wrongResponsibilities are still super
important.
This isn't about blowing upyour life or cutting ties with
all of your responsibilities androles that you play in your
life and in other people's lives.
Those things are still key andstill important.
But how we show up while we'reexecuting these responsibilities
(19:08):
is a direct result of how muchtime you spend with yourself and
what kind of time you spendwith yourself, because, remember
, you're in charge and this isall made up.
We're all out here making it up.
This moment right here is anever before seen moment that we
(19:30):
will never see again, and weare so rich with time and every
day that you get to wake up onthis side of the pavement is a
gift, because if losing my momtaught me anything, it's that
everything can change in aninstant.
We are not promised tomorrow.
(19:51):
And it makes me think of when Iwas, like at the peak of my
hustledom in the Starbucks worldand I was really gunning for
the next promotion and I, like Ichanged cities and I sacrificed
a lot of my wellness in orderto achieve these business
results, in order to get the job, and, like my mentor and the
(20:14):
person who is in charge ofpotentially hiring me for this
job was a total workaholic, I'mtalking.
I would wake up at five o'clockin the morning and I would
already have two emails from herasking me what my results were
for the next day and what I wasgonna do differently today to
impact those results.
Like she was hardcore.
And then there was this realaha moment when I got an email
(20:38):
on Friday morning and she justsaid hey guys, I'm going to be
off the grid.
I just found out that my bestchildhood friend died and I just
can't deal today.
I just can't deal today.
And it was that moment wherehumanity met business and she
(20:58):
made time.
She made time for herself,because you can always make time
.
We all have the same 24 hours,and that saying used to really
piss me off, because we don'tall have the same resources, the
same education, the sameprivilege, the same anything.
We're all unique, but we do allhave the same resources, the
same education, the sameprivilege, the same anything.
We're all unique, but we do allhave the same 24 hours.
(21:20):
So when you think about how wespend it back to that money
analogy you know, if you had allthe money in the world, how
would you spend it If you had afinite, and how would that be
different than if you had afinite amount of money?
So when you think about time, Iwant you to think about what
(21:41):
would you do if you had moretime?
And just start there, becausewhat that does is that opens up
the door for you to startinterrogating and figuring out
where do I like to spend my time, what is in tune with where my
time should be spent?
Look, we've all bought thatthing that we didn't really need
(22:03):
, but wanted to buy it anyway,and we've all spent our time
doing something that may not bein alignment with our best goals
, and maybe more, I don't know,playing candy crush or something
like that, but it does begrepeating that you can do
anything but you can't doeverything.
(22:24):
So that's where we're able toreally dial in tune into what we
really want and align ourschedules to reflect more of who
we are.
Back to us.
So as we go ahead and weinterrogate our habits and our
routines, we can say, look, isthis something that I'm doing
for the sake of doing it?
Go ahead and we interrogate ourhabits and our routines, we can
say, look, is this somethingthat I'm doing for the sake of
doing it?
Is this something that I'mdoing because it's what I've
(22:46):
always done and what are thethings I wish I could do with my
time?
And then what the brain does isit starts solving that problem.
It starts creating littlecracks and crevices where we can
start to pull that thread andthen, all of a sudden, our lives
will start to transform.
So as you move ahead and youstart looking at time and if you
(23:09):
feel like you're chasing afterit, you have an amazing
opportunity to flip the script.
Put yourself back in that pilotseat and start designing the
life and the schedule that isreally a reflection of you and
your goals and your values andyour dreams, and it's filled
with people that you love andit's filled with conversations
(23:30):
that light you up and it bringsyou to rooms that help you reach
for that next level in yourlife, because it's not about
blowing up your life and, heavenforbid, something happens to
you that gives you the whiplashlike I got.
That prompted me to think aboutthings in this way.
Good news is, you've got thispodcast and this is your cue and
(23:51):
your invitation to just take abeat and think about what are
some things that I can let go of, to make space for things that
truly align with me, that makespace for things that make me
feel good, because those thingsripple into every other thing
that you do.
Oh man, I feel like I couldtalk about this for absolutely
(24:12):
ever, so I'm going to wrap thisup.
For now I'm going to shoot itback to the studio where we're
going to wrap up this week'sepisode, but absolutely thrilled
that you tuned in here today.
Anyway, without further ado,thank you for tuning in.
You're gorgeous, keep up.
Keep it up, cutie.
Stay fabulous, love you.
(24:34):
And that was Pocketful of MojoRoad Trip Edition.
(24:56):
Tune in next week to see if wedo it again.
But seriously, thanks fortuning in and I hope that this
has helped you tap into some ofthat mojo of yours, because
you're worth a baby.
Next week, we're going to diginto the business of mojo and
how to take that fabulousfeeling and infuse it into
everything you do, includingyour work.
(25:19):
You, with me, tune in next weekas we figure out all the nuts
and bolts of it all and in themeantime, if you feel like your
mojo could use a tune-up, I'vecome up with lots of ways that
we can do this again sometime.
Make sure you take a coupleminutes to subscribe to this
podcast and extra good, juju, ifyou leave a review, you can
follow me on Instagram atmoststefinitely for daily
(25:42):
mantras, affirmations, and besure to show your love with all
the likes and comments.
I am a recovering peoplepleaser, so you know it means
the world when you do.
Now.
You found me at the verybeginning of All Things Mojo,
and there's so much more on theway.
All the cool links are easilyfound in the show notes, so go
have a look, because you're hereanyway, and, while you're at it
(26:03):
, share this episode with afriend.
It's not only good karma, butit will give you two something
to talk about when you go foryour next little mental health
walk together.
So I'm just getting warmed uphere and I've got so much great
stuff to share with you guys.
So be sure to tune in next weekand until then, stay classy,
(26:26):
stay kind and put love ineverything you do.
Ciao for now.
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