August 15, 2024 • 24 mins
Ever wondered how allowing things to fall apart could actually make you stronger? Today, we unlock the secrets of resilience with our mantra of the week, "I allow things to fall apart and know they'll come back together even stronger." Join me, Steph, as I share personal stories that reveal how life's chaos can lead to unexpected blessings. Inspired by the Japanese art of kintsugi, we'll explore how our scars and traumas can add to our beauty and value, rather than detract from it. In our Mojo on the Go segment, come along for a quick errand to pick up some milk, where we'll discuss defining our baseline and tapping into our innate capacity to bounce back.
But that's not all! In the second segment, we’ll dive deeper into building resilience as an essential skill for thriving through life’s inevitable challenges. You'll discover how reflecting on your past victories and crafting an "I am" list can bolster your self-image and enhance your ability to rebound from setbacks. Maintaining faith and hope, even during tough times, is crucial as we learn that these moments are temporary and often pave the way for greater opportunities. I’ll share practical steps to help you shorten those periods of feeling down and foster a mindset geared towards personal growth and empowerment. Tune in and let’s transform difficulties into triumphs together!
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Transcript
Episode Transcript
Available transcripts are automatically generated. Complete accuracy is not guaranteed.
Speaker 1 (00:11):
Welcome to Pocketful of Mojo, where you're, you and
I'm, steph, and we tune in hereto tap into some mojo.
Well, what do you mean?
What's mojo?
Well, what do you mean?
What's mojo, mojo, is thatfeeling of unshakable confidence
, booming self-worth, likeyou're an unstoppable force of
nature, and I'm here to show youhow you can have that feeling
(00:34):
every single day.
You see, I think I've crackedthe code to being happy.
I'm happy all the freaking time, like every day, at least most
of the day, possibly to anannoying degree.
But hey, I wasn't always thisway.
And not to flex, but I've hadbreakdowns on multiple
continents and in two languages.
(00:56):
But by paying attention andliving with more intention, I've
created this self-love firstaid kit, and it's full of
amazing tools that help me outof life's most sticky and
stressful situations with graceand self-care.
And I'm not here to gatekeep.
In fact, I'm on a mission tohelp you tap into your best
(01:20):
stuff and remember that you haveeverything you need to live
your life on your own terms.
So settle in.
We're here for some positivechange.
So let's dig in to where yourmojo meets the road.
In today's episode, I'm going toreview our mantra for the week
and then we're going to dig intotoday's main topic, which is
(01:41):
resilience and plot plot twist.
We are once again taking it onthe road, shaking things up.
So you stick around and I'mgoing to make sure that you're
glad that you did.
Let's get started with today'smantra and get tuned in, tapped
in and turned on.
Hello, hello, hello and welcome.
(02:09):
This is the 30th freakingepisode, my friends of Pocketful
of Mojo, this is me, I'm Steph,and I'm your Mojo Maven, your
cheerleader, and I'm so gladyou're here.
I'm here to reflect all yourawesome and your potential right
back to you.
So let's settle in.
(02:29):
Let's start by digging intotoday's mantra.
Now, today's mantra is I allowthings to fall apart and know
that they'll come back togethereven stronger.
Hoo-wee, what is this Story ofmy life?
Are you kidding me?
Right now, I'm Steph and havingmy whole life fall apart was
the best thing that everhappened to me Twice.
(02:52):
But seriously, I can back upall this mantra has to say all
day long.
I am living proof thatsometimes, when things fall
apart, it's to get you onto apath that's meant for you For
real, for real.
Now, this mantra is rooted inthe trust and the knowing that
(03:12):
we don't know what we don't know, but it's all going to work out
eventually.
This well-placed faith inyourself, it's going to pay off.
I allow things to fall apart andknow they'll come back together
even stronger.
When you look at the first partof the phrasing allow, it
(03:33):
speaks to how you're consciousthat your world is a dumpster
fire, and remember that this tooshall pass is one of my
favorite mantras, by the way.
It shows the most powerful formof surrender that helps you
feel the helplessness but havethe awareness that there's a
bigger story unfolding.
(03:54):
The bigger the loss, the biggerthe setbacks.
That's redirection, a nudge togreater things.
I allow things to fall apartand know that they'll come back
together even stronger.
So there's this thing.
It's called kintsugi and pleaseforgive my pronunciation, but
(04:14):
it means join with gold.
Maybe you've heard of it.
It's this Japanese art ofrepairing broken objects like
ceramic, pottery or glass.
Now, traditionally they used agold lacquer and they'd use this
to take whatever was smashedand glue it back together again.
What you get is the originalbeauty enhanced by gold.
(04:38):
It's been made more beautifuland more valuable through its
repair or healing, if you willSee where I'm going with this.
I allow things to fall apartand know they'll come back
together even stronger.
Now, when we talk about mojo, Idon't want you to think that
I'm blind to the fact that lifehappens and things fall apart.
(05:00):
My 45 years have beenprivileged, but I'm not without
my own scars and trauma.
But what is part of mojo isresilience and knowing that
these painful and harrowingmoments in our lives are just
temporary and harrowing momentsin our lives are just temporary
(05:21):
and that we will see the otherside of it is at the core of
self-love, self-belief and faithin a bigger picture.
Call it God, call it Source,call it Liza Minnelli.
Whatever your higher power,they will shepherd you through
the storm and it's all inside ofyou.
You just got to tune into it.
I allow things to fall apartand know they'll come back
(05:44):
together even stronger.
And now over to ourcorrespondent on the road,
safely and hands-free, thanks toher new lapel mic.
Ladies and gentlemen andeveryone in between, let's take
it on the road.
Your Mojo Maven Steph oh weeBoy, does she know how to rattle
(06:19):
?
All right, let's get going.
We're going to try this again.
Ladies and gentlemen andeveryone in between, welcome to
Mojo on the Go.
And we're on the go to go pickup some milk and I'm going to
take you with me.
And while we're at it, we'regoing to talk a little bit about
(06:40):
resilience.
My friend, we're all born withit.
It's just a matter of buildingit into our own self-image.
Now, when I think aboutresiliency, it's really like
what it's?
It's your capacity, it capacity, it's, uh, our ability to
spring back into shape, and Iwant to talk more about that in
(07:03):
a second, because we have todefine what that shape is.
What is your go-to, what isyour baseline, what is your
normal?
And that part takes a littlebit more work.
So we're going to talk a littlebit more about that later.
But you know, our humanelasticity is something that we
(07:25):
can actively work on, and how wesee ourselves is often how we
present right.
So when we think like, do youconsider yourself to be a
resilient person?
Because I don't know, I don'tever think.
I even considered it as part ofmy own self image until
everything fell apart.
(07:46):
And there were moments where Imean, when I say everything fell
apart, I mean um, you know,2020, pandemic marriage fell
apart, mom died, had to moveback to Canada, like everything,
everything, capital F fell,capital A apart and in the
(08:10):
process of rebuilding.
That was really when I found outthat I didn't have to go any
further than inside myself tofigure out how to get back on my
own two feet and that I coulddo it myself with the power that
I already have.
So that ability to recoverquickly.
(08:30):
Unfortunately, that means whatwe gotta we gotta hit the bottom
first in order to bounce back,because it's resilience is more
about is about more thanbouncing back.
You know, realizing that yourmojo is available to you even
when you're not feeling like.
It is kind of its own littlepowerful superpower, just
(08:55):
knowing that you can reach outand it'll be there.
That's going to take time, butone of the things that you can
do is, like, look back.
Look back on all the thingsthat you've done before.
Like and that was one of thethings that really helped me
come to where I am today waswhen I felt like I was at my
(09:16):
lowest possible.
I realized that I'd had thisfeeling before, like when I
moved to Calgary to get my dreamjob and I was killing it every
day and for two and a half yearsI had this incredible job that
was using all my best stuff.
I loved going into work today.
(09:38):
And then I went to work one dayand ready to facilitate a
workshop, and just like that, myjob technically no longer
existed within the company andthere I was jobless.
(09:58):
Or the time that I moved toMontreal and I was looking for a
new apartment and I'd rentedthis super cute apartment right
off the Mont Royal stretch.
It was so cool.
I was excited.
I was going to be two blocksaway from work, uh, in this
(10:19):
apartment on moving day, superpsyched, and uh, yeah, I found
out that they had rented it tosomeone else and they didn't
tell me, so I was homeless.
Uh, and then, you know, like Ireferred to earlier, when my
(10:40):
marriage ended and my mom left,I was alone and in each of those
individual moments I reallyfelt like that was it and I
couldn't get better.
But that the trick, when youhave those thoughts, I I've
learned is that these are placesthat we visit, they are not
(11:02):
places that we stay, and that iswhere resilience is born.
And you know, are things goingto be shitty?
Yeah, I promise you, at somepoint in your life there will be
a moment where you're like, ah,this is shitty.
And and when I talk about thisstuff.
I, I am absolutely a positivitymonster.
(11:27):
I will claim that until the dayI die grounded and I am rooted
in the truth that shit happensand all that I talk about within
Mojo is never, ever trying tonegate that or tell you that
it's not going to happen, ortell you that it's not true, or
(11:48):
tell you that it's uh, it's notreal because it is.
But what Mojo does and whatresilience is, it's that belief,
it's that faith, it's thatknowing that this too shall pass
, that this will be in the rearview mirror at some point, and
(12:08):
what point we get to actuallyplay a part in that.
And if we want to stay andwallow and live and just be like
, well, I'm here until the nextshitstorm comes, that's your
choice too.
But there are a multitude ofoptions.
And I'm just here to give you,you know, another look at a
different part of the menu,because, while these things can
(12:30):
be shitty, I promise you theyare not forever.
Because it's important toremember our victories as well.
Because it's important toremember our victories as well,
right, like, think back to thetimes where, okay, yeah, they
scooped my apartment out fromunder me, but you know what else
?
The next apartment I did getwas incredible and way better
(12:53):
and everything I'd ever dreamedof.
So you know, while I'm not hereto pump sunshine up your ass, I
am here to say keep going,because it will pass and it may
morph and bloom into somethingeven better.
And that's where you know, andfaith and hope play really
(13:15):
important roles in resilience.
So these are just kind of someof the things that we want to
keep in mind when we're craftingour own self-image.
Do you see yourself as someonewho is resilient?
Can you look in your past andmaybe see if there's any
examples of a time where youkind of fell on your butt but
(13:35):
you're like you know what I'mgoing to put on my big girl
pants and I'm going to go outand figure this out?
Because a lot of times we feellike paralyzed or stuck because
we don't know that first step orwe don't know the series of
steps that we need to take toflip the situation or, you know,
get back on our feet, butthat's okay as long as we
(13:57):
believe that we can, one step ata time.
The staircase is going to startrevealing itself and there
might be more stumbles ahead,but, um, that can be part of the
figuring out process.
Right, it might be like, okay,well, I tried this and it didn't
work.
Now I know what I don't want.
I'm going to try to figure outwhat I do want Now.
(14:19):
I have a better idea Now that Ihave more information.
So you know that resiliencecomponent it is a muscle, but
you may have flexed it more thanyou were aware.
So a big part of resilience, Iguess, is, like you know,
knowing that you're resilient.
You know, knowing that you'reresilient.
(14:43):
Resilience is about reducingthe time of feeling down and out
right.
It's your ability to snap backto your normal, and this happens
when, like, oh, I forgot, oh no, oh my gosh, oh my gosh, we're
coming up on some construction,which is good cause.
These roads are garbage, butthese roads won't be garbage
(15:07):
forever.
These roads are resilient.
So, when we think about thethings that we can do to build
our resilience and to continueto craft it as part of our
self-image so that we can referto it and lean on it and know
(15:31):
this about ourselves inconfidence as we continue to
navigate this crazy thing calledlife, and we will fall down,
but knowing that we areresilient and knowing that we
have the capacity to get back upon our feet, we can really
quicken the time that we aredown and out, and we can do this
(15:51):
in a couple of ways.
I was doing this the other dayand it was it was as I was kind
of researching resilience anddigging into the topic a bit
more.
I started an I am list becauseI really wanted resilience to be
part of how I self-identify.
(16:11):
I wanted to see myself assomeone who's strong, empowered,
resilient.
And that doesn't mean I'mTeflon, that doesn't mean that
everything is rolls off my back.
It means I believe in myability to get back up again and
that's a really empoweringfeeling.
Actually, it kind of makes mychest stick out a little bit and
(16:34):
my shoulders go back, and Ilike that about myself.
It fits, it feels good and Iknow that I've done the work to
earn that title to give myself.
So I took it one step further.
So I any anyway.
So I went back and I made alist of I am, I am resilient, I
am funny, I am charming, I amsilly, I'm a good baker, I'm
(16:58):
ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba, trust me.
The list goes on and on, andthen I did a list that was this
is a list of the amazing thingsthat I've done.
And that list brought me totears Happy tears, but tears
Because I was so grateful, buttears because I was so grateful
(17:26):
to be like in that moment I wasoverflowing with, like I was
really proud of myself and I wasso grateful for even having the
chance at these opportunitiesand it just kept these, this
feeling and these ideas at theforefront of my mind so that
that could color my futuredecisions, that can color my, my
outlook, that can color my moodand it's really hard to be in a
(17:50):
bad mood after I've spent timesitting and how awesome I am.
So I extend that to you as anactivity.
It's so rewarding and you mayjust surprise yourself.
So this I am exercise, thislist of amazing things that
you've done.
(18:11):
It really helps to eithereliminate or at least interrupt
that feeling of down and out.
At least interrupt that feelingof down and out, that feeling
of I can't do this becausehere's a whole bunch of evidence
that shows the opposite.
Basically, and these exercises,they take that lack mindset and
(18:33):
they flip it on its head.
It reverses that lack mindset,which is only going to keep you
living small, dreamingreasonably, which is not the
purpose of dreams at all and itreally helps to reposition your
perspective about yourself andabout your capacity and your
(18:56):
capability.
Capacity and your capability.
And when I was talking beforeabout springing back into shape,
I want to talk a little bitabout the baseline.
What is your baseline?
Is your baseline happiness?
Is your baseline mojo, you know, is it is your baseline Because
we get to make these decisions.
(19:16):
Baseline because we get to makethese decisions, we get to make
those calls.
So if I define my baseline aslike this great uplifting space
where I see life positively,where I'm in control, where I
have a positive mindset, whereI'm speaking positively to
myself, where I'm surroundingmyself with love and attention
and affection, then that all mywiring systems will always want
(19:44):
to get me back to that place.
So that took me a long time tocraft and cultivate.
But at the same time, one ofthe things I've really noticed
is the more I invest or makedeposits in this way of life,
(20:05):
that I want to live my lifeevery day through a lens of
positivity and love andempowerment and self-care, the
more that's my baseline, theless time I spend out of
alignment, with that being myday-to-day, my moment-to-moment,
(20:26):
my, my standard of operation.
So the more I practice thingslike mindfulness, meditation,
positive affirmations, watchingmyself talk, prioritizing my
self-care, setting andrespecting my own boundaries,
(20:50):
the more I fill my life withthat.
You can only put energy in oneplace at a time.
So as I continue to fill mylife with that, there is less
room for negativity and timesucking and energy sucking
influences.
So it's just math that when youfill your life with more
(21:13):
positive things, there's justgoing to be less room for
negativity.
So the more consciously we candesign our day to day, the
better we stand a chance ofhaving things go our way and be
more prepared when they don't,because we know and we've seen
(21:34):
and we believe that this tooshall pass and we will get back
to our rightful space of livinga life of empowered,
self-confident, self-loving,beautiful days.
And we just get into the habitof collecting as many of those
days as possible, because allwe're really responsible is this
(21:55):
moment right here.
It's the only thing that trulyexists.
So the more we can invest andmake deliberate choices to
contribute to this presentmoment, and it being a
reflection of what you want,then you will start to feel
empowered and you will start tofeel like you can trust a little
(22:16):
bit more and take a little bitbigger swings and just keep
putting one foot in front of theother.
Okay, well, I'm gonna go getsome milk.
I really appreciate youchecking in with me and coming
on this little drive.
I always like company when I goon ons, and so I appreciate you
(22:38):
tuning in.
I'm going to shoot it back tothe studio, but if you have any
comments about resilience orsome great stories that you'd
love to share, I am all over it.
So find me on all the socials.
Thanks for checking in.
Don't forget to rate and reviewthis podcast and let me know
what you think.
Share it with a friend, I don'tknow, just something crazy.
(22:59):
Back to the studio, and thatwas attempt number two at
Pocketful of Mojo Road TripEdition.
Please tune in next week to seeif we do it again.
(23:21):
But seriously, thank you fortuning in today and I hope that
this has helped you tap intosome of that mojo of yours.
You're worth it, baby, and whenyou feel drawn to it, there's
lots of ways we can do thisagain sometime.
If you like to read, I've got aweekly blog.
You can sign up today and youcan get a weekly Mojo magazine,
(23:41):
which is going to be the bestthing in your inbox all week.
We're talking memes, we'retalking Mojo playlists and your
own link to the hottest blog intown.
And if Insta is where you gofor your inspo, you can find me
at moststefinately.
And finally, if you're more ofan action taker, the seven day
(24:02):
mojo makeover is for you, andall these cool links are in my
link tree, which is in the shownotes, so go have a look.
You're here anyway.
I've got so much great stuff toshare with you guys, so be sure
to tune in next week and untilthen, stay classy, stay kind.
Ciao for now.
Welcome to Pocketful of Mojo, where you're, you and
I'm, steph, and we tune in hereto tap into some mojo.
Well, what do you mean?
What's mojo?
Well, what do you mean?
What's mojo, mojo, is thatfeeling of unshakable confidence
, booming self-worth, likeyou're an unstoppable force of
nature, and I'm here to show youhow you can have that feeling
(00:34):
every single day.
You see, I think I've crackedthe code to being happy.
I'm happy all the freaking time, like every day, at least most
of the day, possibly to anannoying degree.
But hey, I wasn't always thisway.
And not to flex, but I've hadbreakdowns on multiple
continents and in two languages.
(00:56):
But by paying attention andliving with more intention, I've
created this self-love firstaid kit, and it's full of
amazing tools that help me outof life's most sticky and
stressful situations with graceand self-care.
And I'm not here to gatekeep.
In fact, I'm on a mission tohelp you tap into your best
(01:20):
stuff and remember that you haveeverything you need to live
your life on your own terms.
So settle in.
We're here for some positivechange.
So let's dig in to where yourmojo meets the road.
In today's episode, I'm going toreview our mantra for the week
and then we're going to dig intotoday's main topic, which is
(01:41):
resilience and plot plot twist.
We are once again taking it onthe road, shaking things up.
So you stick around and I'mgoing to make sure that you're
glad that you did.
Let's get started with today'smantra and get tuned in, tapped
in and turned on.
Hello, hello, hello and welcome.
(02:09):
This is the 30th freakingepisode, my friends of Pocketful
of Mojo, this is me, I'm Steph,and I'm your Mojo Maven, your
cheerleader, and I'm so gladyou're here.
I'm here to reflect all yourawesome and your potential right
back to you.
So let's settle in.
(02:29):
Let's start by digging intotoday's mantra.
Now, today's mantra is I allowthings to fall apart and know
that they'll come back togethereven stronger.
Hoo-wee, what is this Story ofmy life?
Are you kidding me?
Right now, I'm Steph and havingmy whole life fall apart was
the best thing that everhappened to me Twice.
(02:52):
But seriously, I can back upall this mantra has to say all
day long.
I am living proof thatsometimes, when things fall
apart, it's to get you onto apath that's meant for you For
real, for real.
Now, this mantra is rooted inthe trust and the knowing that
(03:12):
we don't know what we don't know, but it's all going to work out
eventually.
This well-placed faith inyourself, it's going to pay off.
I allow things to fall apart andknow they'll come back together
even stronger.
When you look at the first partof the phrasing allow, it
(03:33):
speaks to how you're consciousthat your world is a dumpster
fire, and remember that this tooshall pass is one of my
favorite mantras, by the way.
It shows the most powerful formof surrender that helps you
feel the helplessness but havethe awareness that there's a
bigger story unfolding.
(03:54):
The bigger the loss, the biggerthe setbacks.
That's redirection, a nudge togreater things.
I allow things to fall apartand know that they'll come back
together even stronger.
So there's this thing.
It's called kintsugi and pleaseforgive my pronunciation, but
(04:14):
it means join with gold.
Maybe you've heard of it.
It's this Japanese art ofrepairing broken objects like
ceramic, pottery or glass.
Now, traditionally they used agold lacquer and they'd use this
to take whatever was smashedand glue it back together again.
What you get is the originalbeauty enhanced by gold.
(04:38):
It's been made more beautifuland more valuable through its
repair or healing, if you willSee where I'm going with this.
I allow things to fall apartand know they'll come back
together even stronger.
Now, when we talk about mojo, Idon't want you to think that
I'm blind to the fact that lifehappens and things fall apart.
(05:00):
My 45 years have beenprivileged, but I'm not without
my own scars and trauma.
But what is part of mojo isresilience and knowing that
these painful and harrowingmoments in our lives are just
temporary and harrowing momentsin our lives are just temporary
(05:21):
and that we will see the otherside of it is at the core of
self-love, self-belief and faithin a bigger picture.
Call it God, call it Source,call it Liza Minnelli.
Whatever your higher power,they will shepherd you through
the storm and it's all inside ofyou.
You just got to tune into it.
I allow things to fall apartand know they'll come back
(05:44):
together even stronger.
And now over to ourcorrespondent on the road,
safely and hands-free, thanks toher new lapel mic.
Ladies and gentlemen andeveryone in between, let's take
it on the road.
Your Mojo Maven Steph oh weeBoy, does she know how to rattle
(06:19):
?
All right, let's get going.
We're going to try this again.
Ladies and gentlemen andeveryone in between, welcome to
Mojo on the Go.
And we're on the go to go pickup some milk and I'm going to
take you with me.
And while we're at it, we'regoing to talk a little bit about
(06:40):
resilience.
My friend, we're all born withit.
It's just a matter of buildingit into our own self-image.
Now, when I think aboutresiliency, it's really like
what it's?
It's your capacity, it capacity, it's, uh, our ability to
spring back into shape, and Iwant to talk more about that in
(07:03):
a second, because we have todefine what that shape is.
What is your go-to, what isyour baseline, what is your
normal?
And that part takes a littlebit more work.
So we're going to talk a littlebit more about that later.
But you know, our humanelasticity is something that we
(07:25):
can actively work on, and how wesee ourselves is often how we
present right.
So when we think like, do youconsider yourself to be a
resilient person?
Because I don't know, I don'tever think.
I even considered it as part ofmy own self image until
everything fell apart.
(07:46):
And there were moments where Imean, when I say everything fell
apart, I mean um, you know,2020, pandemic marriage fell
apart, mom died, had to moveback to Canada, like everything,
everything, capital F fell,capital A apart and in the
(08:10):
process of rebuilding.
That was really when I found outthat I didn't have to go any
further than inside myself tofigure out how to get back on my
own two feet and that I coulddo it myself with the power that
I already have.
So that ability to recoverquickly.
(08:30):
Unfortunately, that means whatwe gotta we gotta hit the bottom
first in order to bounce back,because it's resilience is more
about is about more thanbouncing back.
You know, realizing that yourmojo is available to you even
when you're not feeling like.
It is kind of its own littlepowerful superpower, just
(08:55):
knowing that you can reach outand it'll be there.
That's going to take time, butone of the things that you can
do is, like, look back.
Look back on all the thingsthat you've done before.
Like and that was one of thethings that really helped me
come to where I am today waswhen I felt like I was at my
(09:16):
lowest possible.
I realized that I'd had thisfeeling before, like when I
moved to Calgary to get my dreamjob and I was killing it every
day and for two and a half yearsI had this incredible job that
was using all my best stuff.
I loved going into work today.
(09:38):
And then I went to work one dayand ready to facilitate a
workshop, and just like that, myjob technically no longer
existed within the company andthere I was jobless.
(09:58):
Or the time that I moved toMontreal and I was looking for a
new apartment and I'd rentedthis super cute apartment right
off the Mont Royal stretch.
It was so cool.
I was excited.
I was going to be two blocksaway from work, uh, in this
(10:19):
apartment on moving day, superpsyched, and uh, yeah, I found
out that they had rented it tosomeone else and they didn't
tell me, so I was homeless.
Uh, and then, you know, like Ireferred to earlier, when my
(10:40):
marriage ended and my mom left,I was alone and in each of those
individual moments I reallyfelt like that was it and I
couldn't get better.
But that the trick, when youhave those thoughts, I I've
learned is that these are placesthat we visit, they are not
(11:02):
places that we stay, and that iswhere resilience is born.
And you know, are things goingto be shitty?
Yeah, I promise you, at somepoint in your life there will be
a moment where you're like, ah,this is shitty.
And and when I talk about thisstuff.
I, I am absolutely a positivitymonster.
(11:27):
I will claim that until the dayI die grounded and I am rooted
in the truth that shit happensand all that I talk about within
Mojo is never, ever trying tonegate that or tell you that
it's not going to happen, ortell you that it's not true, or
(11:48):
tell you that it's uh, it's notreal because it is.
But what Mojo does and whatresilience is, it's that belief,
it's that faith, it's thatknowing that this too shall pass
, that this will be in the rearview mirror at some point, and
(12:08):
what point we get to actuallyplay a part in that.
And if we want to stay andwallow and live and just be like
, well, I'm here until the nextshitstorm comes, that's your
choice too.
But there are a multitude ofoptions.
And I'm just here to give you,you know, another look at a
different part of the menu,because, while these things can
(12:30):
be shitty, I promise you theyare not forever.
Because it's important toremember our victories as well.
Because it's important toremember our victories as well,
right, like, think back to thetimes where, okay, yeah, they
scooped my apartment out fromunder me, but you know what else
?
The next apartment I did getwas incredible and way better
(12:53):
and everything I'd ever dreamedof.
So you know, while I'm not hereto pump sunshine up your ass, I
am here to say keep going,because it will pass and it may
morph and bloom into somethingeven better.
And that's where you know, andfaith and hope play really
(13:15):
important roles in resilience.
So these are just kind of someof the things that we want to
keep in mind when we're craftingour own self-image.
Do you see yourself as someonewho is resilient?
Can you look in your past andmaybe see if there's any
examples of a time where youkind of fell on your butt but
(13:35):
you're like you know what I'mgoing to put on my big girl
pants and I'm going to go outand figure this out?
Because a lot of times we feellike paralyzed or stuck because
we don't know that first step orwe don't know the series of
steps that we need to take toflip the situation or, you know,
get back on our feet, butthat's okay as long as we
(13:57):
believe that we can, one step ata time.
The staircase is going to startrevealing itself and there
might be more stumbles ahead,but, um, that can be part of the
figuring out process.
Right, it might be like, okay,well, I tried this and it didn't
work.
Now I know what I don't want.
I'm going to try to figure outwhat I do want Now.
(14:19):
I have a better idea Now that Ihave more information.
So you know that resiliencecomponent it is a muscle, but
you may have flexed it more thanyou were aware.
So a big part of resilience, Iguess, is, like you know,
knowing that you're resilient.
You know, knowing that you'reresilient.
(14:43):
Resilience is about reducingthe time of feeling down and out
right.
It's your ability to snap backto your normal, and this happens
when, like, oh, I forgot, oh no, oh my gosh, oh my gosh, we're
coming up on some construction,which is good cause.
These roads are garbage, butthese roads won't be garbage
(15:07):
forever.
These roads are resilient.
So, when we think about thethings that we can do to build
our resilience and to continueto craft it as part of our
self-image so that we can referto it and lean on it and know
(15:31):
this about ourselves inconfidence as we continue to
navigate this crazy thing calledlife, and we will fall down,
but knowing that we areresilient and knowing that we
have the capacity to get back upon our feet, we can really
quicken the time that we aredown and out, and we can do this
(15:51):
in a couple of ways.
I was doing this the other dayand it was it was as I was kind
of researching resilience anddigging into the topic a bit
more.
I started an I am list becauseI really wanted resilience to be
part of how I self-identify.
(16:11):
I wanted to see myself assomeone who's strong, empowered,
resilient.
And that doesn't mean I'mTeflon, that doesn't mean that
everything is rolls off my back.
It means I believe in myability to get back up again and
that's a really empoweringfeeling.
Actually, it kind of makes mychest stick out a little bit and
(16:34):
my shoulders go back, and Ilike that about myself.
It fits, it feels good and Iknow that I've done the work to
earn that title to give myself.
So I took it one step further.
So I any anyway.
So I went back and I made alist of I am, I am resilient, I
am funny, I am charming, I amsilly, I'm a good baker, I'm
(16:58):
ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba, trust me.
The list goes on and on, andthen I did a list that was this
is a list of the amazing thingsthat I've done.
And that list brought me totears Happy tears, but tears
Because I was so grateful, buttears because I was so grateful
(17:26):
to be like in that moment I wasoverflowing with, like I was
really proud of myself and I wasso grateful for even having the
chance at these opportunitiesand it just kept these, this
feeling and these ideas at theforefront of my mind so that
that could color my futuredecisions, that can color my, my
outlook, that can color my moodand it's really hard to be in a
(17:50):
bad mood after I've spent timesitting and how awesome I am.
So I extend that to you as anactivity.
It's so rewarding and you mayjust surprise yourself.
So this I am exercise, thislist of amazing things that
you've done.
(18:11):
It really helps to eithereliminate or at least interrupt
that feeling of down and out.
At least interrupt that feelingof down and out, that feeling
of I can't do this becausehere's a whole bunch of evidence
that shows the opposite.
Basically, and these exercises,they take that lack mindset and
(18:33):
they flip it on its head.
It reverses that lack mindset,which is only going to keep you
living small, dreamingreasonably, which is not the
purpose of dreams at all and itreally helps to reposition your
perspective about yourself andabout your capacity and your
(18:56):
capability.
Capacity and your capability.
And when I was talking beforeabout springing back into shape,
I want to talk a little bitabout the baseline.
What is your baseline?
Is your baseline happiness?
Is your baseline mojo, you know, is it is your baseline Because
we get to make these decisions.
(19:16):
Baseline because we get to makethese decisions, we get to make
those calls.
So if I define my baseline aslike this great uplifting space
where I see life positively,where I'm in control, where I
have a positive mindset, whereI'm speaking positively to
myself, where I'm surroundingmyself with love and attention
and affection, then that all mywiring systems will always want
(19:44):
to get me back to that place.
So that took me a long time tocraft and cultivate.
But at the same time, one ofthe things I've really noticed
is the more I invest or makedeposits in this way of life,
(20:05):
that I want to live my lifeevery day through a lens of
positivity and love andempowerment and self-care, the
more that's my baseline, theless time I spend out of
alignment, with that being myday-to-day, my moment-to-moment,
(20:26):
my, my standard of operation.
So the more I practice thingslike mindfulness, meditation,
positive affirmations, watchingmyself talk, prioritizing my
self-care, setting andrespecting my own boundaries,
(20:50):
the more I fill my life withthat.
You can only put energy in oneplace at a time.
So as I continue to fill mylife with that, there is less
room for negativity and timesucking and energy sucking
influences.
So it's just math that when youfill your life with more
(21:13):
positive things, there's justgoing to be less room for
negativity.
So the more consciously we candesign our day to day, the
better we stand a chance ofhaving things go our way and be
more prepared when they don't,because we know and we've seen
(21:34):
and we believe that this tooshall pass and we will get back
to our rightful space of livinga life of empowered,
self-confident, self-loving,beautiful days.
And we just get into the habitof collecting as many of those
days as possible, because allwe're really responsible is this
(21:55):
moment right here.
It's the only thing that trulyexists.
So the more we can invest andmake deliberate choices to
contribute to this presentmoment, and it being a
reflection of what you want,then you will start to feel
empowered and you will start tofeel like you can trust a little
(22:16):
bit more and take a little bitbigger swings and just keep
putting one foot in front of theother.
Okay, well, I'm gonna go getsome milk.
I really appreciate youchecking in with me and coming
on this little drive.
I always like company when I goon ons, and so I appreciate you
(22:38):
tuning in.
I'm going to shoot it back tothe studio, but if you have any
comments about resilience orsome great stories that you'd
love to share, I am all over it.
So find me on all the socials.
Thanks for checking in.
Don't forget to rate and reviewthis podcast and let me know
what you think.
Share it with a friend, I don'tknow, just something crazy.
(22:59):
Back to the studio, and thatwas attempt number two at
Pocketful of Mojo Road TripEdition.
Please tune in next week to seeif we do it again.
(23:21):
But seriously, thank you fortuning in today and I hope that
this has helped you tap intosome of that mojo of yours.
You're worth it, baby, and whenyou feel drawn to it, there's
lots of ways we can do thisagain sometime.
If you like to read, I've got aweekly blog.
You can sign up today and youcan get a weekly Mojo magazine,
(23:41):
which is going to be the bestthing in your inbox all week.
We're talking memes, we'retalking Mojo playlists and your
own link to the hottest blog intown.
And if Insta is where you gofor your inspo, you can find me
at moststefinately.
And finally, if you're more ofan action taker, the seven day
(24:02):
mojo makeover is for you, andall these cool links are in my
link tree, which is in the shownotes, so go have a look.
You're here anyway.
I've got so much great stuff toshare with you guys, so be sure
to tune in next week and untilthen, stay classy, stay kind.
Ciao for now.
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