March 26, 2024 • 41 mins
Everyone has a story and every story deserves to be told, heard, and honored. Your host, Julie Marty-Pearson, interviews her friend and fellow podcaster, Rebecca Johnson, about her journey in podcasting.
When Rebecca and I first crossed paths in person at PodFest earlier this year, it wasn't just a meeting of minds—it was a heart-felt connection, bound by the shared passion of podcasting. This conversation is a testament to that very bond. We discuss how community and networking are the lifeblood of any podcaster's journey. With stories of widowhood and the healing power of humor, we talk about the intimate paths of personal transformation and the strength that comes from a collective voice in podcasting. Our conversation moves through the complexities of beginning a podcast, the therapeutic embrace of sharing our stories, and the joy of witnessing our podcasts evolve alongside us. It's a story of starting simple yet dreaming big, a balance every podcaster strives for. Rebecca brings her unique insights into podcasting for women, underscoring the importance of authentic storytelling in a world that too often muffles female voices.
During our chat, I also share how Rebecca's podcast recently impacted me deeply and gave me the push to tell my story, part of which is told in the previous episode of this podcast. Just as we discuss from our own experiences in podcasting and how your story is just waiting to be amplified by the podcasting community. Are you ready to Podcast Your Story Now?
Guest, Rebecca Johnson is the vibrant voice behind 'Love is Not Dead, Just My Husband,' a podcast crafted to uplift and empower widows on their unique paths of healing and rediscovery. As a widow herself, Rebecca has faced some of life's toughest challenges with unwavering resilience, including overcoming multiple losses and living with an incurable cancer. Through her podcast, Rebecca weaves personal triumphs with heartfelt stories, diving into the transformative journey of widowhood finding joy in life and loss. With her infectious 'Widow Your Way' attitude, she breaks down stereotypes and offers a welcoming space for widows to find co
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Transcript
Episode Transcript
Available transcripts are automatically generated. Complete accuracy is not guaranteed.
Speaker 1 (00:04):
Hello, my friend.
Welcome to the Podcast.
Your Story Now podcast.
I am your host, julie MartyPearson, podcaster and coach for
new and aspiring podcasters.
I am so excited to have youhere to listen to this new
episode.
I hope this story inspires youand gets you motivated to
podcast your story now.
(00:24):
I'm so excited to have myfriend and fellow podcaster here
, rebecca Johnson.
Rebecca, thank you so much forbeing on the podcast with me
today.
I'm so excited.
So, rebecca and I know eachother mostly virtually.
(00:48):
We've been in a podcastingcommunity for gosh several years
now.
We finally got to meet inperson recently at PodFest,
where it was just like anamazing community of female
podcasters.
We all know each other and wefinally got to all meet in
person.
What was that like for you,rebecca?
Speaker 2 (01:03):
finally, got to all meet in person.
What was that like for you,rebecca?
Well, podfest.
In general.
I love PodFest because it's allabout community people helping
each other.
Everyone there is so supportiveLike.
I've never been to a placewhere the community is just so
encouraging and supportive.
Everybody wants to helpeveryone with their podcast, it
(01:24):
doesn't matter what it is.
But one of the things that Ireally like most about PodFest
is being able to meet in personwith my podcast family and
you're in that family and so wefinally got to meet in person
this year.
That was so exciting.
Speaker 1 (01:49):
One of the things I'm talking about on this podcast
trying to help other women gettheir podcasting journey started
is talking about how importantit is not to isolate yourself,
because podcasting can be lonelyand isolating.
So for you, how important isthat?
Networking and community ofother podcasters how important
has that been to your journey,oh my gosh, I don't.
Speaker 2 (02:09):
Honestly, I don't think I could do it if it wasn't
for my podcast community.
There's still a few people thatwere in the cohort that I was
in to launch my podcast that Ido still communicate with, but
since then I've made otherpodcasting friends Of course you
but I couldn't do it withoutpodcasting friends and I'm not.
(02:33):
How do I say this?
I don't want to say this thewrong way.
I don't want anyone to takethis the wrong way, but when
you're picking your podcastfriends, but when you're picking
your podcast friends, you needto pick people that are going to
be your podcasting friends.
Like you have podcastingfriends that you can just
(02:56):
communicate with, like say, hey,how you doing, and you support
each other online and thingslike that.
But you need podcasting friendsthat are going to support you
outside of that.
You need podcasting friendsthat want to meet, that want to
actually message with you.
(03:19):
You want podcasting friends thatyou can help each other.
Like I can ask you a question,like I can send you a message
and I can ask you a question,and I don't feel like you're
going to hide the information onhow to do that, right?
So if I'm stuck and I need help.
I need to be able to go tosomeone and say how do you do
this?
(03:39):
And someone say this is how youdo it.
Or hey, would you like to do aZoom and let me show you how to
do it?
Yes, I would absolutely lovethat.
Those are the podcastingfriends that you need.
I mean, you do need tosocialize with other podcasters,
but you need a community.
(04:00):
You need people that you canrely on and that will be there
for you in that aspect.
If not, it can be very lonelyand you can get discouraged very
quickly.
Speaker 1 (04:14):
Yes, I think that's so important because, look,
podcasting is great and havingcourses and having programs that
you purchase to learn parts ofit is necessary.
You and I have both done that.
Some of them have been the same, Some of them have been
different.
We've been in a membershipgroup before, but we're also in
free groups together wherepeople literally post I'm trying
(04:36):
to do this, why isn't itworking, or how did you do this,
and people will respond there'sno, oh well, if you pay me,
I'll do a session for you.
No, we're going to support eachother.
We're going to say I know howto do it.
I'm going to show you.
Speaker 2 (04:51):
There's going to be something that I don't know and
you'll help me when that happens.
Exactly that's.
Yeah, that is the communitythat you need, because I'm not
going to lie I have reached outto someone for help and one for
help and thought, oh, I can ask,and then I was hit with a this
is my price for that, right Likeoh, we must not be that close,
(05:14):
my bad.
Speaker 1 (05:15):
And you learn who your people are and maybe who
are just more businessnetworking people.
You need all of it, yes, butyou really need that.
Like you said, it's a truefriendship community that
support people who are willingto collaborate, just like we're
doing right now.
You're coming on my podcast.
We're in groups where we doreview swaps, we do episode
(05:37):
swaps, whatever it is.
We support each other and thatis so vital, especially for
women in podcasting.
Yes, yes I have to say, going topodfest, it was my first
in-person conference and I wasstill pretty shocked at how many
men were there versus women.
Like I think it's still afairly male dominated medium,
(05:59):
even though there's more andmore women.
That's one of the reasons Istarted this podcast is women
need to tell their story throughpodcasting.
So first, as a woman, why doyou think it was important for
you to tell your story andmultiple stories at this point?
Speaker 2 (06:14):
obviously, well, I'll be honest with you Whenever I
started my podcast, I wasn'tnecessarily thinking about being
a woman, but it was all aboutbeing a widow.
But I guess, technically, awidow is a woman, true, so, yeah
, so, but gosh, what was thequestion?
Speaker 1 (06:35):
now, okay, so for everyone who's mean it's okay If
I was a widow or a woman.
I don't know, I guess ourwidowers, can they be.
They're going to be male or noWidowers are men, widows are
women.
Speaker 2 (06:52):
Oh, see I learned something.
Speaker 1 (06:55):
So we haven't.
I introduced you as my friendand fellow podcaster, but I
haven't said Rebecca has apodcast called Love is Not Dead
Just my Husband.
And Rebecca has a podcastcalled Love is Not Dead Just my
Husband.
I always get a good chucklewhenever I tell people about you
and give that title, and what Ithink people can learn from
that title is attention grabbing.
Titles grab people's attentionand they stop and they want to
(07:17):
listen.
Speaker 2 (07:18):
So I love the title.
Speaker 1 (07:19):
Yes, so that is your podcast.
Obviously, you started it totell your story as a widow,
that's where we were.
There you go.
So, not necessarilyspecifically as a woman, but as
a widow.
You wanted to reach otherwidows, meaning reach other
women who had or were goingthrough what you had been
through.
Yes, so in that capacity, whydid you decide you wanted to
(07:43):
tell that story?
In that capacity, why did youdecide you wanted to tell that
story?
Speaker 2 (07:45):
Initially I wanted to find a community.
I was looking for support withwhere I was at in my widow
journey.
So I wasn't quite there with awidow who just lost her husband
(08:07):
and I wasn't quite there with awidow who's maybe remarried, had
more children and well intotheir chapter two.
But I was stuck on movingforward.
I wanted to move forward and Iwas struggling with how to do
that and I was looking for otherwidows who were in that same
(08:29):
time period as me.
Speaker 1 (08:31):
That makes sense so.
Speaker 2 (08:33):
I wanted to share my story because that is where I
was struggling.
I was stuck, I was stuck in mygrief and I was so comfortable
with the pain, that's just.
I wanted to leave that, and Iwas already on a journey in that
(08:56):
direction and I just happenedto get support and love and
encouragement from a group ofwomen that I had met on a
women's wellness retreat inMexico.
These women changed my life andwe became friends and then it
just came about that I should dosome public speaking to share
(09:17):
my story, and I was reallynervous about being in front of
people and being on stage andone of the girls had the idea
they're like you should do apodcast.
You are hilarious, you shoulddo a podcast.
And I'm like I can hide behinda mic.
I can hide behind a mic.
Speaker 1 (09:36):
I could do that, I can talk and I concur that you
have the best humor in generalbut about your own experience
that you catch people off guard.
But it's such a great way tomove through pain and grief and
you just have such a positive,humorous perspective that I love
that about you.
Oh, thank you, but I think whatyou said is important.
(09:56):
You realized you had a story totell.
You wanted to find other peoplethat you knew would connect
with where you were and youmight be able to help each other
.
You wanted to maybe go intopublic speaking, but you weren't
ready for that leap, sopodcasting came as a good first
step.
Speaker 2 (10:13):
Yes, it has been.
It has been quite theexperience and I do feel like
it's preparing me for that nextstep.
So it's been quite the year andit's it's been a journey.
Speaker 1 (10:27):
And I think that's important because I think so
many people hear now videoYouTube stuff.
True, the true podcasts arestill audio only Now.
That doesn't mean you can't doother mediums, but a lot of us
started because of the appeal ofaudio only right, like you said
, behind the mic.
Yes, it's also now.
(10:50):
There's other parts to it, likesocial media and video and
going live and all these things.
So how did that initial step inpodcasting pull you into the
more uncomfortable stuff youweren't ready to do?
Speaker 2 (11:04):
I learned it because I had to.
I mean, this part is the easypart, right, the fun part coming
up with the ideas and what youwant to share in recording it.
That's the fun part.
The hard stuff is the editing.
The time it takes to edit thesocial media, coming up with
(11:27):
what to put on social media,worried about what your
Instagram looks like.
Do I have a bio?
Do I have a website?
Do I need a website?
What's an RSS feed?
Speaker 1 (11:38):
I still don't know, podcasting has its own language
that you've got to learn.
And there's, I still learn newstuff every day and I'm like, oh
, that's how you do it, oh,that's cool.
Speaker 2 (11:51):
Yeah, and then you learn the social media and it's
not just a post, and then it's areel, and then it's a TikTok,
and then it's a YouTube, andthen it's now we got to do
interviews, and now I got tolearn how to do an interview,
and now I need another platformand it's a constant learning
experience.
(12:12):
But through it all, I feel likeI am more comfortable with
sharing my story.
Sharing my story, I've learnedto be more consistent.
I've learned a lot aboutaccountability.
Whenever you have listeners.
I'm learning to how to speakbetter.
(12:38):
Believe it or not, I still saya lot of ands and ums and likes
because I mean, that's how wetalk in general.
Right, I mean we all don'tsound like these professional
little robots, but that wasultimately the goal is to get
into public speaking and to be apublic speaker.
Speaker 1 (12:57):
You do have to be a little professional, so I've
been learning a littleprofessionalism along the way
too, but I think that'simportant, I think, because it's
okay to start in the messy.
That's what I did, like Ididn't edit my first few
episodes at all, I just decidedto put it out there.
Then you get a buddy going torespond to this or listen to it,
(13:17):
and then from them I startedediting more and doing the music
and all the things.
So you start where you are andyou grow.
That's the great thing aboutpodcasting, like you said, it's
you're constantly evolving andlearning new things.
But you also don't have to doit all right now.
Right, you don't have to be onevery social media platform.
(13:38):
You don't have to do anewsletter and an email list and
a blog.
That's great if you can add itlater.
So where have you reallylearned that balance in terms of
you can grow your podcastwithout having to do every
single?
Speaker 2 (13:52):
thing, it's mindset, because in the beginning, like
most people, I was reallyexcited and I wanted to do
everything.
I wanted to do everything and Iwant to do all the things and I
wanted to do them all at once.
(14:16):
That was extremely overwhelmingand I just had to decide.
What's most important and forme, most important was the
podcast itself, getting out theepisodes and sharing.
Then I took the next step,which was social media, and I
(14:37):
wasn't good at it.
I didn't really know what I wasdoing.
I didn't really know whatlisteners wanted, so I was just
putting anything out there, andI recommend just doing that,
just putting anything out therebecause that's going to get you
over your fear.
I mean, it took me at leastalmost a year before I really
(15:02):
learned anything about socialmedia.
And I took a class.
Actually, it was a free class,it was a free challenge, it was
the Sasa Challenge.
Speaker 1 (15:15):
Okay, ina Coveney, who is a colleague and coach to
both of us, who is amazing.
She does amazing masterclassesand challenges around building
your visibility with socialmedia, with a small audience.
Speaker 2 (15:30):
Yes, I did her free salsa challenge and I learned so
much about Instagram and socialmedia just doing that and
really, truly, that's how Ilearned to do my Instagram and
once I learned, it was easier.
Now am I consistent at it andstill that great at it?
(15:53):
No, but I try and that's reallyit.
Just try.
Speaker 1 (15:58):
Just try.
I think that's so importantbecause it can be overwhelming
to think you have to post everyday and something new and all
these things.
It's like you can post it.
You can post it when it worksfor you, you can post it when it
feels right and you can postsomething you posted a month ago
again because who knows ifsomebody saw it a month ago.
There's so many things that youhave to get comfortable with
that.
I don't honestly know how theinfluencers keep up with the
(16:22):
daily stories and the TikToksand all of that.
It feels overwhelming to me.
But I also think what you saidwas good to say is you just got
to try it and see how it goes,because you're going to get a
sense of what people respond towhen you start posting.
Yes, yes, so we've talked aboutwhy you started, why you did
(16:42):
podcasting, but we haven'treally actually talked much
about your story specifically.
Speaker 2 (16:46):
Oh.
Speaker 1 (16:47):
So we can get into it a little bit.
I know it's a long story.
It's evolved since through thelast five to six years for you.
But I know when you startedyour podcast you were starting
it, like you said, because youwere looking for a community and
you were podcasting your storyat the time, which you said was
in this in-between kind of limbobut in your grieving process.
(17:09):
So how did you feel aboutstarting there and where you've
ended up with the podcast?
Has that changed?
What has that process been likefor you?
Speaker 2 (17:18):
Yeah, so it's changed drastically.
In 14 months I launchedDecember 2022.
I launched.
Everything's changed since then.
Halfway through the year, Irebranded because I learned a
little bit more about branding.
(17:39):
So I rebranded about halfwaythrough the year.
Then at the end of the year sojust in November I found out my
cancer had metastasized.
So that has also had my podcastchanged a little bit.
So I've pivoted and that'ssomething that new podcasters
(18:03):
should also know that yourpodcast can change at any point.
It doesn't have to remain thesame.
You can pivot as much as youwant.
You can pivot a little bit, youcan pivot a lot.
So now in my podcast I stilltalk about grief and loss, but
actually I take that back.
(18:25):
Well, I do talk about grief,but in the beginning my podcast
was mostly about grief and lossand moving forward.
Now my podcast is more aboutlife and loss and moving forward
.
Speaker 1 (18:42):
And I think that's such an important journey for
listeners to hear, because Ithink myself even, and so many
people are so afraid of change.
You've got your podcast, you'redoing your thing.
I can't change it.
I can't talk about somethingelse, I can't do a different
format, I can't change the name.
Actually, you can.
You can do whatever you wantand you're a prime example of
(19:05):
your life has shifted, so yourpodcast has shifted too.
Speaker 2 (19:10):
Yeah, and that's the thing.
It's OK that it's going toshift, because you're always
going to find your people.
You're always going to find the, your listeners, your audience.
I just like to say your people,because they're my people.
You're always going to findyour people, no matter what
you're pivoting to, becauseyou're probably pivoting in a
(19:31):
different direction.
That one you need to go.
Change is also good, because Idon't think we grow if we don't
have change.
There's so much you can learnfrom that.
Your listeners can learn rightalong with you.
Speaker 1 (19:45):
Right.
I think that's importantbecause some listeners will get
bored if you're talking aboutthe same thing over and over
again.
Maybe they're not getting whatthey need anymore, and that's
okay, but there's going to beother people, like you said, are
going to find you.
They're going to find you and,whatever it is you're saying or
telling, they're going to cometo you because of that, and
you're a prime example of thepeople are going to find you
because you had a pretty bigmilestone recently the end of
(20:08):
2023, you hit 10,000 downloads,if I remember.
Speaker 2 (20:13):
I did I hit 10,000 downloads, exactly one year and
two days from the launch of mypodcast.
So, I was so excited about thatand the downloads is not
important, like that's not whatwe should focus on the downloads
and I don't even know what itwas, but it was around nine
(20:40):
months.
It was right around nine monthsSomething changed in my
listeners and that is when mynumbers started to grow.
That's when my downloadsstarted to grow.
For nine months I didn't havemuch.
It was very slow growing for meand it was, I know, at least
(21:08):
six months before I had my firstwidow listener reach out to me.
I mean, I thought the onlypeople that was listening to my
podcast was my family and myfriends and me.
I was listening every week onevery platform, just to get a
download.
Speaker 1 (21:26):
So I've done the same thing.
Speaker 2 (21:28):
Look I don't care, I'm not even embarrassed, I'm
not even embarrassed about that.
Speaker 1 (21:33):
I think we all do that, especially in the
beginning.
We're like download, yeah, andI think it's important what you
said.
Downloads aren't everything youhear about that.
And, of course, it's importantwhat you said Downloads aren't
everything you hear about that.
And, of course, the big onesthat's what they promote,
because downloads are where youget ads and all those things.
But for us, indie podcasters,yes, it's important.
We want to look at it.
What episodes are big?
(21:54):
What do people like?
What don't they like?
All of that.
But I think what's important isyou talked about social media.
Wasn't your focus?
You aren't on every platform,but your listeners still found
your podcast.
Yeah, absolutely.
I think that's an importantthing because we hear that so
much.
And, yes, it is important andit's great to be able to say my
(22:16):
podcast did this, or I'm in thetop 10 percent, or I'm in all
those things, because it's greatand people think, well, if
people are listening, I shouldcheck it out too.
So it is important.
But you don't want to focus onthat.
I do it sometimes like stoplooking at the numbers.
Speaker 2 (22:30):
Yeah, and what else, since we're talking about that
and you mentioned the title ofthe podcast Love Is Not Dead,
just my Husband.
When I started the podcast, Igot some pushback from the
community about the title in SEO, which is search engine
optimization.
I still don't go by search SEO.
(22:54):
It's not on my priority list, Ido not prioritize SEO.
My priority list, I do notprioritize SEO.
And when I first started peoplewere like, well, no one's going
to find your podcast.
When they search widow, it'snot going to come up.
When they search dead husbandit might, but who is searching
(23:16):
dead husband?
So, but what?
I did a little trick.
So my podcast is Love Is NotDead, just my Husband.
But my tagline is Widow yourWay.
So what I did is on Buzzsproutfor the title you include I put
Widow your Way, then in my shownotes I always include at the
(23:41):
very bottom.
I always say, and as always,widow your way.
So at least because everyplatform search is different.
Some people search just thetitle, some search from the show
notes.
So I just made sure widow wasin the title and widow was in
the show notes and anyone who'sgoing to search widow, it's
(24:02):
going to pop up.
That's the extent of my SEO.
Speaker 1 (24:07):
Hey, it works, and I think one thing is go with what
you want, what you'recomfortable with.
If that has meaning to you,it's going to come through to
people.
For one, and also I've seenmore people doing that where
they have their title and thenthey have like their tagline in
the title when it's on platforms, and it does help because it
gives you more words for it tobe searched.
(24:28):
So I think that's a powerfultrick tool to do as well,
because it allows you to havewhatever name you want but still
get that tagline.
Taglines can be reallyimportant for podcasts.
Speaker 2 (24:40):
Yes, yes, that's what I did.
Speaker 1 (24:43):
Recently your episodes have been more have
been talking a little bit aboutyour life in terms of being now
with stage four cancer, becauseyour eye cancer has metastasized
and I was recently listening toone of your episodes that
really touched me in a way thatyou probably don't know.
So I want to share that withyou a little bit, because one of
(25:05):
the reasons I want to start mysecond podcast Podcast your
Story Now is because I have myown personal stories I've never
really shared, because my firstpodcast is all about my pets,
and so I was listening to one ofyour episodes and you talked
about your initial eye cancerand how you ended up having to
lose one of your eyes and youtalked about that.
There was grief in that lossthat you had to grieve, the loss
(25:29):
of losing a body part and whatthat meant in terms of your life
and what you would look like.
And it hit me because I've gonethrough not anything similar.
I never had cancer or anythinglike that, but I've dealt with
autoimmune disease issues sinceI was a kid and in my 20s I
started having all theseproblems with my teeth.
(25:50):
I have a disorder that causessevere dry mouth, so literally
my teeth started breaking.
It would just chip and breakand all these things and there's
a whole story I have gone intoon the podcast, but ultimately I
had to lose all my teeth.
So what you see now aredentures.
I haven't had my own teeth forGosh 13, 14 years now and it was
(26:16):
something that I was veryinsecure about.
I didn't like to talk about it.
When I had the surgery and didit all, very few people knew
what was happening.
Very few people knew after, andwhen people would tell other
people and I found out about it,I would get upset Like this is
my story.
You're not allowed to tellother people and there was
(26:37):
something about the way youtalked about your loss with your
cancer.
That was like I realized I'vebeen grieving something that I
never really realized what I wasgoing through and it just made
me go oh my gosh, rebecca.
You just made me feel seen andI just wanted to first thank you
for putting it out there and beso brave to just openly talk
about it so that you realize itdoes impact people, because it
(27:00):
impacted me and you wouldn'thave even known that if I hadn't
told you.
Speaker 2 (27:03):
Oh Julie, that's, sweet.
Speaker 1 (27:10):
So I think that right there for me is the power of
podcasting.
You don't realize what peoplego through or have gone through
or are going through, that youtelling your story is going to
make somebody else feel okay andfeel like, oh, I'm not weird, I
went through something and it'sokay to have had a hard time
with it.
Speaker 2 (27:29):
Yeah, and you know what else.
I'm glad you shared that.
Thank you so much because, aswomen shared that.
Thank you so much because, aswomen, we can't help but to be a
little self-conscious about ourlooks.
And I was just on a LinkedInLive the other night and showing
(27:50):
up perspectives of cancer andwe were talking about this and
about how some diseases orillnesses are invisible.
Yep, and people can't see that.
And us, as women, we can't helpbut be concerned about our
looks and I don't think it.
(28:11):
I mean it just is we do.
And I have lots of scars thatI've had to get used to.
I have to get used to aprosthetic eye.
I got this long scar on myforehead from skin cancer.
Now I have a port for mytreatments that I just I really
am struggling with physicallyWell, mentally and emotionally.
Speaker 1 (28:34):
Right Because of the physical, but the looks of it
physically, emotionally, but thelooks of it physically.
Speaker 2 (28:43):
You sharing that and you were listening to a widow
podcast.
You were listening to a widowpodcast and you're not even a
widow and you got something outof that and that is you're
exactly right, one of the mostpowerful things about podcasting
, because you can listen to apodcast and you don't know what
(29:03):
you're going to get out of it.
You don't know what you'regoing to get.
You're not you're.
You don't know what you'regoing to relate.
I have people that message meall the time and say I am not a
widow, but what you saidresonates.
And when you share your story,even though your podcast is
going to be about sharingbeautiful stories of women
(29:25):
podcasters and starting theirpodcast, there's going to be
stories that you're going toshare that aren't even going to
have anything to do with thatand are going to touch people
and inspire people.
And they're going to think, ohmy, with that, and are going to
touch people and inspire peopleand they're going to think, oh
my God, I can relate to that.
Yes, she just shared that.
She's so brave, she's soamazing, I can do that now.
(29:49):
And then they're going to wantto start a podcast.
Or even if they don't start apodcast, it will give someone
the courage to share their story, absolutely.
Speaker 1 (30:02):
I think that, especially as women, we were
taught for so long to just keepit to yourself.
You're not a problem, you don'tcomplain, you just do it
whatever it is.
And even though social media isall about looks, you're not
supposed to worry about that.
You're just supposed to keepmoving.
But there's all these things aswomen we go through women
trying to get pregnant and can'tnot be able to get pregnant,
(30:24):
all the IVF, all the women'sright issues For me being 46, I
had a hysterectomy several yearsago all the changes in my body
from that Again, no one can seethat I'm going through that and
I know so many women go throughit and don't talk about it and
feel ashamed of the things thatare changing.
But, just like what you said,people who go through cancer and
all these things that sometimesit's visible, like when women
(30:46):
lose their hair or whatever itmay be, but a lot of times it's
not, and we're holding all ofthat in and we're carrying it
around with us.
But sometimes just saying it,telling your story, sharing your
experience, not only helpsothers feel heard, but it
releases it from you, fromcarrying it around and being
worried about it.
Speaker 2 (31:07):
Yes, and you know what else.
This just goes back to what wewere initially talking about
with having a podcast community.
Yes, because it's I mean, it'salready difficult for women out
there in general and then in theworld and women podcasters and
(31:29):
someone who may podcast, likeyou said, it's very lonely,
right?
And I know a lot of people whopodcast because they don't have
any other outlet, they don'thave any other friends, they
don't have a good support system, right?
So these airwaves, thismicrophone, is their way of
(31:56):
expressing themselves.
Absolutely way of expressingthemselves, absolutely so,
having a podcast community andpodcast friends, but more
importantly, I say my podcastfamily, because the community
that I am in, the people thatI've met, which include you, are
(32:17):
like family at this point.
We're not just friends, we arefamily.
I mean, at minimum, cousins.
So, but yeah, that's importanttoo for women.
So when you are feelinginsecure about how you sound on
the microphone, let's gettogether.
Maybe it's the microphone, it'snot you, and you're like well,
(32:41):
I don't think I'm saying this inthe right way, let's say it to
us.
Or if you're trying to do thatfirst reel on social media and
you're like how does this look?
How does it come across?
Show us, let us tell you, Letus help you.
You're scared to show thatpicture.
We were just talking aboutpictures and I was just saying,
(33:03):
like, look at you selfies onInstagram.
Speaker 1 (33:07):
I need to step up my selfie game because I'm not
showing my face and that's partof community too as we push each
other along like, oh, she didit.
Oh, look, how great that looks,I'm going to try that.
Wait, how did you do it?
Oh, I can do that now.
That's part of it.
We're not only helping, but wemotivate each other.
Just like I said with listeningto your podcast, I've been
thinking about telling this partof my story for a long time.
(33:29):
I've seen things in some showswhere people talk about
something similar, but when Iheard yours and I'm just like it
was grief.
It is grief sometimes still,that's powerful and, like you
said, I was listening to a widowpodcast.
But really the underlying thingis grief, and we have grief in
so many different ways.
That's one way that you reachpeople, but having that
(33:52):
community is what makes you feelsolid enough to do it and keep
doing it and keep moving forwardwhen you have that reassurance
and that support.
Speaker 2 (34:01):
Yeah, and here's the thing you can only get that type
of reassurance from yourpodcast community, right?
You can't get that from yourfriends and your family.
My friends and family are verysupportive, but, first of all, I
know they all don't listen tomy podcast, and that's okay.
(34:22):
They all don't have to listento the podcast.
They better not tell me they'renot listening to the podcast.
But, deep down, you don't haveto listen to my podcast, right.
But when it comes to whatpodcasting entails and what you
need to do to grow your podcast,you cannot get that from your
(34:42):
friends and your family, becauseif they are not podcasters,
they're not going to be able torelate.
This is why having your podcastcommunity is so important if
you're going to start a podcast.
Speaker 1 (34:55):
Absolutely.
And if you're listening to thisand you're thinking about it,
you thought about it you canreach out to either one of us
and say I listened to you and Ilove what you said.
I'm trying to start.
Do you have any advice orsuggestions?
We're here, or like OK, youjust said you did this.
How did you do that?
We are here to support you.
That's what we do.
(35:23):
We have a group of us thatwe've come from other groups and
we're still.
We're going to.
We're going to continue meetingmonthly to support each other
and collaborate and just talkabout podcasting or other things
.
But, oh gosh, that support isso important and I think we saw
each other at PodFest it justamplified it.
Speaker 2 (35:34):
Yes, I mean.
There is nothing like theenergy that you get from another
human being in your presence.
Speaker 1 (35:53):
I was nominated.
Rebecca was nominated forseveral awards and it was really
for independent women andnon-binary podcasters.
So what was it?
It was a room full of mostlywomen and non-binary podcasters.
There were a few men theresupporting and just the energy
in that room for every award andthe nominations and who won.
(36:14):
It was just electric.
We were screaming and jumpingup and we were all dressed up.
It was such an amazingexperience.
I haven't had an experiencelike that, probably ever related
to a professional aspect of myworld.
I definitely haven't.
It was just, yeah, I think itwas such a great way to kick it
off because we all just weregoing off that energy.
(36:36):
But also when you won, therewas like this I think all of us
who have known you, have beenany part of your journey, felt
like we won too.
It was just so exciting.
Didn't you pick up my phone?
So I was sitting next to Rebeccaand she had been recording
everything and she was recordingand it was hers.
(36:57):
She was nominated for aPeople's Choice Award and she
pushed hard and we all voted forher every day and so they
announced it and she, like,jumped up with her phone and
then she threw it down on thetable to run up to receive the
award.
So I picked it up and then Irecorded her whole accepting the
award and everything.
It was so funny she turned itinto a reel.
It was amazing.
(37:17):
Oh, that was.
It was so funny, she turned itinto a reel it was amazing.
Speaker 2 (37:20):
Oh, that was yeah.
Look, I was so surprised.
I was like, please win, Pleasewin.
I've never won an award beforein my life.
I want to win and everybody wasvoting.
But let me tell you, that tooka lot of work.
It took a lot of work to beconsistent on social media and
asking people to vote for youand it's.
(37:43):
It was hard too, like I wasembarrassed but I was excited at
the same time, but I was alsoembarrassed to post it and get
that attention and it was scaryto ask people to vote for me and
it was scary to ask people tovote for me, right?
Speaker 1 (38:02):
But I did it and it paid off, but it also helped you
grow.
Speaker 2 (38:05):
in a way, it did it.
It pushed my limits.
It took me just being nominated, and asking people for votes
took me out of my comfort zone,because that's not something
that I would normally ask peopleto do.
Speaker 1 (38:25):
Right, and you know, the one thing that you wouldn't
know, I didn't know until I wasa podcaster is most podcast
awards are you self-nominate.
I mean, people can nominate you, but a lot of them you actually
pay a fee and nominate yourself, like especially some of the
really big ones.
And so I know one.
I wasn't nominated by someoneelse, but there was one I had
nominated myself because I wastold that's what you do.
I'm like, well, that's so weird, but if that's what everybody
(38:45):
does, then yeah, I want to beproud of what I've created and
do it too.
But I think for you it was thataspect of you pushed.
You asked and people responded.
Speaker 2 (38:56):
Yes, yes, and then just the support was
overwhelming.
The support was overwhelming.
And then that just goes to showwho your listeners are.
And then other people weresharing it and they're probably
like what's this?
Why am I going to vote for her?
Well, let me listen to thatpodcast, right?
Speaker 1 (39:14):
Yeah, absolutely.
Speaker 2 (39:15):
There's a download.
Speaker 1 (39:23):
If you listen for four minutes counts, so just
push play.
You don't even have to payattention.
No, really, I know to listen,but you know everybody plays the
game too well, I think what wehave said through all of this is
podcasting is such anincredible platform.
It can be very healing, it canbe motivating, it can do so much
(39:43):
.
But it's okay to be scared,it's okay to try things, it's
okay to change, it's okay to doother things, because we're both
examples of you.
Do it, what works for you, whatyou like, what people respond
to.
It's all just a part of theprocess, but community is what's
really most important.
Speaker 2 (40:01):
Yes, I agree, Start messy, but start, Do it how you
want to do it.
There are no podcasting police.
No matter what they say or whatyou hear from anyone, there are
no podcasting police.
There is no one that's going tocome up to you and say you did
from anyone.
There are no podcasting police.
There is no one that's going tocome up to you and say you did
(40:22):
that wrong and give you a fineNope.
Yeah, I think everybody wantsto know this is how you do it.
Speaker 1 (40:30):
This is how you don't do it.
No, there are 10 different waysto do everything, and you pick
what works for you, what feelsright.
Speaker 2 (40:36):
Yes, I love that.
And then the podcasters, likethe big people, like Mel Robbins
, kathy Heller, jenna Kutcher,all of them, they have an entire
team, yeah, so it looks thatgreat.
And it sounds that greatbecause they got the best of the
(40:57):
best people doing it, but youknow what you got.
You got yourself and you arejust as awesome, so remember
that you can do exactly whatthey do.
Speaker 1 (41:12):
Thank you so much for listening to this episode.
It means so much to me to haveyou here.
Make sure you don't miss anynew episodes of the podcast.
Hit, subscribe wherever you arelistening right now and new
episodes will automatically popup in your feed as they come out
.
If you enjoyed this episode,please share it with friends and
family, and make sure to leavea rating and review wherever you
(41:34):
are listening.
That will help the podcast togrow.
Come on over to Instagram atpodcastyourstorynow to keep up
with me and the podcast so thatyou can be ready to podcast your
story now.
Hello, my friend.
Welcome to the Podcast.
Your Story Now podcast.
I am your host, julie MartyPearson, podcaster and coach for
new and aspiring podcasters.
I am so excited to have youhere to listen to this new
episode.
I hope this story inspires youand gets you motivated to
podcast your story now.
(00:24):
I'm so excited to have myfriend and fellow podcaster here
, rebecca Johnson.
Rebecca, thank you so much forbeing on the podcast with me
today.
I'm so excited.
So, rebecca and I know eachother mostly virtually.
(00:48):
We've been in a podcastingcommunity for gosh several years
now.
We finally got to meet inperson recently at PodFest,
where it was just like anamazing community of female
podcasters.
We all know each other and wefinally got to all meet in
person.
What was that like for you,rebecca?
Speaker 2 (01:03):
finally, got to all meet in person.
What was that like for you,rebecca?
Well, podfest.
In general.
I love PodFest because it's allabout community people helping
each other.
Everyone there is so supportiveLike.
I've never been to a placewhere the community is just so
encouraging and supportive.
Everybody wants to helpeveryone with their podcast, it
(01:24):
doesn't matter what it is.
But one of the things that Ireally like most about PodFest
is being able to meet in personwith my podcast family and
you're in that family and so wefinally got to meet in person
this year.
That was so exciting.
Speaker 1 (01:49):
One of the things I'm talking about on this podcast
trying to help other women gettheir podcasting journey started
is talking about how importantit is not to isolate yourself,
because podcasting can be lonelyand isolating.
So for you, how important isthat?
Networking and community ofother podcasters how important
has that been to your journey,oh my gosh, I don't.
Speaker 2 (02:09):
Honestly, I don't think I could do it if it wasn't
for my podcast community.
There's still a few people thatwere in the cohort that I was
in to launch my podcast that Ido still communicate with, but
since then I've made otherpodcasting friends Of course you
but I couldn't do it withoutpodcasting friends and I'm not.
(02:33):
How do I say this?
I don't want to say this thewrong way.
I don't want anyone to takethis the wrong way, but when
you're picking your podcastfriends, but when you're picking
your podcast friends, you needto pick people that are going to
be your podcasting friends.
Like you have podcastingfriends that you can just
(02:56):
communicate with, like say, hey,how you doing, and you support
each other online and thingslike that.
But you need podcasting friendsthat are going to support you
outside of that.
You need podcasting friendsthat want to meet, that want to
actually message with you.
(03:19):
You want podcasting friends thatyou can help each other.
Like I can ask you a question,like I can send you a message
and I can ask you a question,and I don't feel like you're
going to hide the information onhow to do that, right?
So if I'm stuck and I need help.
I need to be able to go tosomeone and say how do you do
this?
(03:39):
And someone say this is how youdo it.
Or hey, would you like to do aZoom and let me show you how to
do it?
Yes, I would absolutely lovethat.
Those are the podcastingfriends that you need.
I mean, you do need tosocialize with other podcasters,
but you need a community.
(04:00):
You need people that you canrely on and that will be there
for you in that aspect.
If not, it can be very lonelyand you can get discouraged very
quickly.
Speaker 1 (04:14):
Yes, I think that's so important because, look,
podcasting is great and havingcourses and having programs that
you purchase to learn parts ofit is necessary.
You and I have both done that.
Some of them have been the same, Some of them have been
different.
We've been in a membershipgroup before, but we're also in
free groups together wherepeople literally post I'm trying
(04:36):
to do this, why isn't itworking, or how did you do this,
and people will respond there'sno, oh well, if you pay me,
I'll do a session for you.
No, we're going to support eachother.
We're going to say I know howto do it.
I'm going to show you.
Speaker 2 (04:51):
There's going to be something that I don't know and
you'll help me when that happens.
Exactly that's.
Yeah, that is the communitythat you need, because I'm not
going to lie I have reached outto someone for help and one for
help and thought, oh, I can ask,and then I was hit with a this
is my price for that, right Likeoh, we must not be that close,
(05:14):
my bad.
Speaker 1 (05:15):
And you learn who your people are and maybe who
are just more businessnetworking people.
You need all of it, yes, butyou really need that.
Like you said, it's a truefriendship community that
support people who are willingto collaborate, just like we're
doing right now.
You're coming on my podcast.
We're in groups where we doreview swaps, we do episode
(05:37):
swaps, whatever it is.
We support each other and thatis so vital, especially for
women in podcasting.
Yes, yes I have to say, going topodfest, it was my first
in-person conference and I wasstill pretty shocked at how many
men were there versus women.
Like I think it's still afairly male dominated medium,
(05:59):
even though there's more andmore women.
That's one of the reasons Istarted this podcast is women
need to tell their story throughpodcasting.
So first, as a woman, why doyou think it was important for
you to tell your story andmultiple stories at this point?
Speaker 2 (06:14):
obviously, well, I'll be honest with you Whenever I
started my podcast, I wasn'tnecessarily thinking about being
a woman, but it was all aboutbeing a widow.
But I guess, technically, awidow is a woman, true, so, yeah
, so, but gosh, what was thequestion?
Speaker 1 (06:35):
now, okay, so for everyone who's mean it's okay If
I was a widow or a woman.
I don't know, I guess ourwidowers, can they be.
They're going to be male or noWidowers are men, widows are
women.
Speaker 2 (06:52):
Oh, see I learned something.
Speaker 1 (06:55):
So we haven't.
I introduced you as my friendand fellow podcaster, but I
haven't said Rebecca has apodcast called Love is Not Dead
Just my Husband.
And Rebecca has a podcastcalled Love is Not Dead Just my
Husband.
I always get a good chucklewhenever I tell people about you
and give that title, and what Ithink people can learn from
that title is attention grabbing.
Titles grab people's attentionand they stop and they want to
(07:17):
listen.
Speaker 2 (07:18):
So I love the title.
Speaker 1 (07:19):
Yes, so that is your podcast.
Obviously, you started it totell your story as a widow,
that's where we were.
There you go.
So, not necessarilyspecifically as a woman, but as
a widow.
You wanted to reach otherwidows, meaning reach other
women who had or were goingthrough what you had been
through.
Yes, so in that capacity, whydid you decide you wanted to
(07:43):
tell that story?
In that capacity, why did youdecide you wanted to tell that
story?
Speaker 2 (07:45):
Initially I wanted to find a community.
I was looking for support withwhere I was at in my widow
journey.
So I wasn't quite there with awidow who just lost her husband
(08:07):
and I wasn't quite there with awidow who's maybe remarried, had
more children and well intotheir chapter two.
But I was stuck on movingforward.
I wanted to move forward and Iwas struggling with how to do
that and I was looking for otherwidows who were in that same
(08:29):
time period as me.
Speaker 1 (08:31):
That makes sense so.
Speaker 2 (08:33):
I wanted to share my story because that is where I
was struggling.
I was stuck, I was stuck in mygrief and I was so comfortable
with the pain, that's just.
I wanted to leave that, and Iwas already on a journey in that
(08:56):
direction and I just happenedto get support and love and
encouragement from a group ofwomen that I had met on a
women's wellness retreat inMexico.
These women changed my life andwe became friends and then it
just came about that I should dosome public speaking to share
(09:17):
my story, and I was reallynervous about being in front of
people and being on stage andone of the girls had the idea
they're like you should do apodcast.
You are hilarious, you shoulddo a podcast.
And I'm like I can hide behinda mic.
I can hide behind a mic.
Speaker 1 (09:36):
I could do that, I can talk and I concur that you
have the best humor in generalbut about your own experience
that you catch people off guard.
But it's such a great way tomove through pain and grief and
you just have such a positive,humorous perspective that I love
that about you.
Oh, thank you, but I think whatyou said is important.
(09:56):
You realized you had a story totell.
You wanted to find other peoplethat you knew would connect
with where you were and youmight be able to help each other
.
You wanted to maybe go intopublic speaking, but you weren't
ready for that leap, sopodcasting came as a good first
step.
Speaker 2 (10:13):
Yes, it has been.
It has been quite theexperience and I do feel like
it's preparing me for that nextstep.
So it's been quite the year andit's it's been a journey.
Speaker 1 (10:27):
And I think that's important because I think so
many people hear now videoYouTube stuff.
True, the true podcasts arestill audio only Now.
That doesn't mean you can't doother mediums, but a lot of us
started because of the appeal ofaudio only right, like you said
, behind the mic.
Yes, it's also now.
(10:50):
There's other parts to it, likesocial media and video and
going live and all these things.
So how did that initial step inpodcasting pull you into the
more uncomfortable stuff youweren't ready to do?
Speaker 2 (11:04):
I learned it because I had to.
I mean, this part is the easypart, right, the fun part coming
up with the ideas and what youwant to share in recording it.
That's the fun part.
The hard stuff is the editing.
The time it takes to edit thesocial media, coming up with
(11:27):
what to put on social media,worried about what your
Instagram looks like.
Do I have a bio?
Do I have a website?
Do I need a website?
What's an RSS feed?
Speaker 1 (11:38):
I still don't know, podcasting has its own language
that you've got to learn.
And there's, I still learn newstuff every day and I'm like, oh
, that's how you do it, oh,that's cool.
Speaker 2 (11:51):
Yeah, and then you learn the social media and it's
not just a post, and then it's areel, and then it's a TikTok,
and then it's a YouTube, andthen it's now we got to do
interviews, and now I got tolearn how to do an interview,
and now I need another platformand it's a constant learning
experience.
(12:12):
But through it all, I feel likeI am more comfortable with
sharing my story.
Sharing my story, I've learnedto be more consistent.
I've learned a lot aboutaccountability.
Whenever you have listeners.
I'm learning to how to speakbetter.
(12:38):
Believe it or not, I still saya lot of ands and ums and likes
because I mean, that's how wetalk in general.
Right, I mean we all don'tsound like these professional
little robots, but that wasultimately the goal is to get
into public speaking and to be apublic speaker.
Speaker 1 (12:57):
You do have to be a little professional, so I've
been learning a littleprofessionalism along the way
too, but I think that'simportant, I think, because it's
okay to start in the messy.
That's what I did, like Ididn't edit my first few
episodes at all, I just decidedto put it out there.
Then you get a buddy going torespond to this or listen to it,
(13:17):
and then from them I startedediting more and doing the music
and all the things.
So you start where you are andyou grow.
That's the great thing aboutpodcasting, like you said, it's
you're constantly evolving andlearning new things.
But you also don't have to doit all right now.
Right, you don't have to be onevery social media platform.
(13:38):
You don't have to do anewsletter and an email list and
a blog.
That's great if you can add itlater.
So where have you reallylearned that balance in terms of
you can grow your podcastwithout having to do every
single?
Speaker 2 (13:52):
thing, it's mindset, because in the beginning, like
most people, I was reallyexcited and I wanted to do
everything.
I wanted to do everything and Iwant to do all the things and I
wanted to do them all at once.
(14:16):
That was extremely overwhelmingand I just had to decide.
What's most important and forme, most important was the
podcast itself, getting out theepisodes and sharing.
Then I took the next step,which was social media, and I
(14:37):
wasn't good at it.
I didn't really know what I wasdoing.
I didn't really know whatlisteners wanted, so I was just
putting anything out there, andI recommend just doing that,
just putting anything out therebecause that's going to get you
over your fear.
I mean, it took me at leastalmost a year before I really
(15:02):
learned anything about socialmedia.
And I took a class.
Actually, it was a free class,it was a free challenge, it was
the Sasa Challenge.
Speaker 1 (15:15):
Okay, ina Coveney, who is a colleague and coach to
both of us, who is amazing.
She does amazing masterclassesand challenges around building
your visibility with socialmedia, with a small audience.
Speaker 2 (15:30):
Yes, I did her free salsa challenge and I learned so
much about Instagram and socialmedia just doing that and
really, truly, that's how Ilearned to do my Instagram and
once I learned, it was easier.
Now am I consistent at it andstill that great at it?
(15:53):
No, but I try and that's reallyit.
Just try.
Speaker 1 (15:58):
Just try.
I think that's so importantbecause it can be overwhelming
to think you have to post everyday and something new and all
these things.
It's like you can post it.
You can post it when it worksfor you, you can post it when it
feels right and you can postsomething you posted a month ago
again because who knows ifsomebody saw it a month ago.
There's so many things that youhave to get comfortable with
that.
I don't honestly know how theinfluencers keep up with the
(16:22):
daily stories and the TikToksand all of that.
It feels overwhelming to me.
But I also think what you saidwas good to say is you just got
to try it and see how it goes,because you're going to get a
sense of what people respond towhen you start posting.
Yes, yes, so we've talked aboutwhy you started, why you did
(16:42):
podcasting, but we haven'treally actually talked much
about your story specifically.
Speaker 2 (16:46):
Oh.
Speaker 1 (16:47):
So we can get into it a little bit.
I know it's a long story.
It's evolved since through thelast five to six years for you.
But I know when you startedyour podcast you were starting
it, like you said, because youwere looking for a community and
you were podcasting your storyat the time, which you said was
in this in-between kind of limbobut in your grieving process.
(17:09):
So how did you feel aboutstarting there and where you've
ended up with the podcast?
Has that changed?
What has that process been likefor you?
Speaker 2 (17:18):
Yeah, so it's changed drastically.
In 14 months I launchedDecember 2022.
I launched.
Everything's changed since then.
Halfway through the year, Irebranded because I learned a
little bit more about branding.
(17:39):
So I rebranded about halfwaythrough the year.
Then at the end of the year sojust in November I found out my
cancer had metastasized.
So that has also had my podcastchanged a little bit.
So I've pivoted and that'ssomething that new podcasters
(18:03):
should also know that yourpodcast can change at any point.
It doesn't have to remain thesame.
You can pivot as much as youwant.
You can pivot a little bit, youcan pivot a lot.
So now in my podcast I stilltalk about grief and loss, but
actually I take that back.
(18:25):
Well, I do talk about grief,but in the beginning my podcast
was mostly about grief and lossand moving forward.
Now my podcast is more aboutlife and loss and moving forward
.
Speaker 1 (18:42):
And I think that's such an important journey for
listeners to hear, because Ithink myself even, and so many
people are so afraid of change.
You've got your podcast, you'redoing your thing.
I can't change it.
I can't talk about somethingelse, I can't do a different
format, I can't change the name.
Actually, you can.
You can do whatever you wantand you're a prime example of
(19:05):
your life has shifted, so yourpodcast has shifted too.
Speaker 2 (19:10):
Yeah, and that's the thing.
It's OK that it's going toshift, because you're always
going to find your people.
You're always going to find the, your listeners, your audience.
I just like to say your people,because they're my people.
You're always going to findyour people, no matter what
you're pivoting to, becauseyou're probably pivoting in a
(19:31):
different direction.
That one you need to go.
Change is also good, because Idon't think we grow if we don't
have change.
There's so much you can learnfrom that.
Your listeners can learn rightalong with you.
Speaker 1 (19:45):
Right.
I think that's importantbecause some listeners will get
bored if you're talking aboutthe same thing over and over
again.
Maybe they're not getting whatthey need anymore, and that's
okay, but there's going to beother people, like you said, are
going to find you.
They're going to find you and,whatever it is you're saying or
telling, they're going to cometo you because of that, and
you're a prime example of thepeople are going to find you
because you had a pretty bigmilestone recently the end of
(20:08):
2023, you hit 10,000 downloads,if I remember.
Speaker 2 (20:13):
I did I hit 10,000 downloads, exactly one year and
two days from the launch of mypodcast.
So, I was so excited about thatand the downloads is not
important, like that's not whatwe should focus on the downloads
and I don't even know what itwas, but it was around nine
(20:40):
months.
It was right around nine monthsSomething changed in my
listeners and that is when mynumbers started to grow.
That's when my downloadsstarted to grow.
For nine months I didn't havemuch.
It was very slow growing for meand it was, I know, at least
(21:08):
six months before I had my firstwidow listener reach out to me.
I mean, I thought the onlypeople that was listening to my
podcast was my family and myfriends and me.
I was listening every week onevery platform, just to get a
download.
Speaker 1 (21:26):
So I've done the same thing.
Speaker 2 (21:28):
Look I don't care, I'm not even embarrassed, I'm
not even embarrassed about that.
Speaker 1 (21:33):
I think we all do that, especially in the
beginning.
We're like download, yeah, andI think it's important what you
said.
Downloads aren't everything youhear about that.
And, of course, it's importantwhat you said Downloads aren't
everything you hear about that.
And, of course, the big onesthat's what they promote,
because downloads are where youget ads and all those things.
But for us, indie podcasters,yes, it's important.
We want to look at it.
What episodes are big?
(21:54):
What do people like?
What don't they like?
All of that.
But I think what's important isyou talked about social media.
Wasn't your focus?
You aren't on every platform,but your listeners still found
your podcast.
Yeah, absolutely.
I think that's an importantthing because we hear that so
much.
And, yes, it is important andit's great to be able to say my
(22:16):
podcast did this, or I'm in thetop 10 percent, or I'm in all
those things, because it's greatand people think, well, if
people are listening, I shouldcheck it out too.
So it is important.
But you don't want to focus onthat.
I do it sometimes like stoplooking at the numbers.
Speaker 2 (22:30):
Yeah, and what else, since we're talking about that
and you mentioned the title ofthe podcast Love Is Not Dead,
just my Husband.
When I started the podcast, Igot some pushback from the
community about the title in SEO, which is search engine
optimization.
I still don't go by search SEO.
(22:54):
It's not on my priority list, Ido not prioritize SEO.
My priority list, I do notprioritize SEO.
And when I first started peoplewere like, well, no one's going
to find your podcast.
When they search widow, it'snot going to come up.
When they search dead husbandit might, but who is searching
(23:16):
dead husband?
So, but what?
I did a little trick.
So my podcast is Love Is NotDead, just my Husband.
But my tagline is Widow yourWay.
So what I did is on Buzzsproutfor the title you include I put
Widow your Way, then in my shownotes I always include at the
(23:41):
very bottom.
I always say, and as always,widow your way.
So at least because everyplatform search is different.
Some people search just thetitle, some search from the show
notes.
So I just made sure widow wasin the title and widow was in
the show notes and anyone who'sgoing to search widow, it's
(24:02):
going to pop up.
That's the extent of my SEO.
Speaker 1 (24:07):
Hey, it works, and I think one thing is go with what
you want, what you'recomfortable with.
If that has meaning to you,it's going to come through to
people.
For one, and also I've seenmore people doing that where
they have their title and thenthey have like their tagline in
the title when it's on platforms, and it does help because it
gives you more words for it tobe searched.
(24:28):
So I think that's a powerfultrick tool to do as well,
because it allows you to havewhatever name you want but still
get that tagline.
Taglines can be reallyimportant for podcasts.
Speaker 2 (24:40):
Yes, yes, that's what I did.
Speaker 1 (24:43):
Recently your episodes have been more have
been talking a little bit aboutyour life in terms of being now
with stage four cancer, becauseyour eye cancer has metastasized
and I was recently listening toone of your episodes that
really touched me in a way thatyou probably don't know.
So I want to share that withyou a little bit, because one of
(25:05):
the reasons I want to start mysecond podcast Podcast your
Story Now is because I have myown personal stories I've never
really shared, because my firstpodcast is all about my pets,
and so I was listening to one ofyour episodes and you talked
about your initial eye cancerand how you ended up having to
lose one of your eyes and youtalked about that.
There was grief in that lossthat you had to grieve, the loss
(25:29):
of losing a body part and whatthat meant in terms of your life
and what you would look like.
And it hit me because I've gonethrough not anything similar.
I never had cancer or anythinglike that, but I've dealt with
autoimmune disease issues sinceI was a kid and in my 20s I
started having all theseproblems with my teeth.
(25:50):
I have a disorder that causessevere dry mouth, so literally
my teeth started breaking.
It would just chip and breakand all these things and there's
a whole story I have gone intoon the podcast, but ultimately I
had to lose all my teeth.
So what you see now aredentures.
I haven't had my own teeth forGosh 13, 14 years now and it was
(26:16):
something that I was veryinsecure about.
I didn't like to talk about it.
When I had the surgery and didit all, very few people knew
what was happening.
Very few people knew after, andwhen people would tell other
people and I found out about it,I would get upset Like this is
my story.
You're not allowed to tellother people and there was
(26:37):
something about the way youtalked about your loss with your
cancer.
That was like I realized I'vebeen grieving something that I
never really realized what I wasgoing through and it just made
me go oh my gosh, rebecca.
You just made me feel seen andI just wanted to first thank you
for putting it out there and beso brave to just openly talk
about it so that you realize itdoes impact people, because it
(27:00):
impacted me and you wouldn'thave even known that if I hadn't
told you.
Speaker 2 (27:03):
Oh Julie, that's, sweet.
Speaker 1 (27:10):
So I think that right there for me is the power of
podcasting.
You don't realize what peoplego through or have gone through
or are going through, that youtelling your story is going to
make somebody else feel okay andfeel like, oh, I'm not weird, I
went through something and it'sokay to have had a hard time
with it.
Speaker 2 (27:29):
Yeah, and you know what else.
I'm glad you shared that.
Thank you so much because, aswomen shared that.
Thank you so much because, aswomen, we can't help but to be a
little self-conscious about ourlooks.
And I was just on a LinkedInLive the other night and showing
(27:50):
up perspectives of cancer andwe were talking about this and
about how some diseases orillnesses are invisible.
Yep, and people can't see that.
And us, as women, we can't helpbut be concerned about our
looks and I don't think it.
(28:11):
I mean it just is we do.
And I have lots of scars thatI've had to get used to.
I have to get used to aprosthetic eye.
I got this long scar on myforehead from skin cancer.
Now I have a port for mytreatments that I just I really
am struggling with physicallyWell, mentally and emotionally.
Speaker 1 (28:34):
Right Because of the physical, but the looks of it
physically, emotionally, but thelooks of it physically.
Speaker 2 (28:43):
You sharing that and you were listening to a widow
podcast.
You were listening to a widowpodcast and you're not even a
widow and you got something outof that and that is you're
exactly right, one of the mostpowerful things about podcasting
, because you can listen to apodcast and you don't know what
(29:03):
you're going to get out of it.
You don't know what you'regoing to get.
You're not you're.
You don't know what you'regoing to relate.
I have people that message meall the time and say I am not a
widow, but what you saidresonates.
And when you share your story,even though your podcast is
going to be about sharingbeautiful stories of women
(29:25):
podcasters and starting theirpodcast, there's going to be
stories that you're going toshare that aren't even going to
have anything to do with thatand are going to touch people
and inspire people.
And they're going to think, ohmy, with that, and are going to
touch people and inspire peopleand they're going to think, oh
my God, I can relate to that.
Yes, she just shared that.
She's so brave, she's soamazing, I can do that now.
(29:49):
And then they're going to wantto start a podcast.
Or even if they don't start apodcast, it will give someone
the courage to share their story, absolutely.
Speaker 1 (30:02):
I think that, especially as women, we were
taught for so long to just keepit to yourself.
You're not a problem, you don'tcomplain, you just do it
whatever it is.
And even though social media isall about looks, you're not
supposed to worry about that.
You're just supposed to keepmoving.
But there's all these things aswomen we go through women
trying to get pregnant and can'tnot be able to get pregnant,
(30:24):
all the IVF, all the women'sright issues For me being 46, I
had a hysterectomy several yearsago all the changes in my body
from that Again, no one can seethat I'm going through that and
I know so many women go throughit and don't talk about it and
feel ashamed of the things thatare changing.
But, just like what you said,people who go through cancer and
all these things that sometimesit's visible, like when women
(30:46):
lose their hair or whatever itmay be, but a lot of times it's
not, and we're holding all ofthat in and we're carrying it
around with us.
But sometimes just saying it,telling your story, sharing your
experience, not only helpsothers feel heard, but it
releases it from you, fromcarrying it around and being
worried about it.
Speaker 2 (31:07):
Yes, and you know what else.
This just goes back to what wewere initially talking about
with having a podcast community.
Yes, because it's I mean, it'salready difficult for women out
there in general and then in theworld and women podcasters and
(31:29):
someone who may podcast, likeyou said, it's very lonely,
right?
And I know a lot of people whopodcast because they don't have
any other outlet, they don'thave any other friends, they
don't have a good support system, right?
So these airwaves, thismicrophone, is their way of
(31:56):
expressing themselves.
Absolutely way of expressingthemselves, absolutely so,
having a podcast community andpodcast friends, but more
importantly, I say my podcastfamily, because the community
that I am in, the people thatI've met, which include you, are
(32:17):
like family at this point.
We're not just friends, we arefamily.
I mean, at minimum, cousins.
So, but yeah, that's importanttoo for women.
So when you are feelinginsecure about how you sound on
the microphone, let's gettogether.
Maybe it's the microphone, it'snot you, and you're like well,
(32:41):
I don't think I'm saying this inthe right way, let's say it to
us.
Or if you're trying to do thatfirst reel on social media and
you're like how does this look?
How does it come across?
Show us, let us tell you, Letus help you.
You're scared to show thatpicture.
We were just talking aboutpictures and I was just saying,
(33:03):
like, look at you selfies onInstagram.
Speaker 1 (33:07):
I need to step up my selfie game because I'm not
showing my face and that's partof community too as we push each
other along like, oh, she didit.
Oh, look, how great that looks,I'm going to try that.
Wait, how did you do it?
Oh, I can do that now.
That's part of it.
We're not only helping, but wemotivate each other.
Just like I said with listeningto your podcast, I've been
thinking about telling this partof my story for a long time.
(33:29):
I've seen things in some showswhere people talk about
something similar, but when Iheard yours and I'm just like it
was grief.
It is grief sometimes still,that's powerful and, like you
said, I was listening to a widowpodcast.
But really the underlying thingis grief, and we have grief in
so many different ways.
That's one way that you reachpeople, but having that
(33:52):
community is what makes you feelsolid enough to do it and keep
doing it and keep moving forwardwhen you have that reassurance
and that support.
Speaker 2 (34:01):
Yeah, and here's the thing you can only get that type
of reassurance from yourpodcast community, right?
You can't get that from yourfriends and your family.
My friends and family are verysupportive, but, first of all, I
know they all don't listen tomy podcast, and that's okay.
(34:22):
They all don't have to listento the podcast.
They better not tell me they'renot listening to the podcast.
But, deep down, you don't haveto listen to my podcast, right.
But when it comes to whatpodcasting entails and what you
need to do to grow your podcast,you cannot get that from your
(34:42):
friends and your family, becauseif they are not podcasters,
they're not going to be able torelate.
This is why having your podcastcommunity is so important if
you're going to start a podcast.
Speaker 1 (34:55):
Absolutely.
And if you're listening to thisand you're thinking about it,
you thought about it you canreach out to either one of us
and say I listened to you and Ilove what you said.
I'm trying to start.
Do you have any advice orsuggestions?
We're here, or like OK, youjust said you did this.
How did you do that?
We are here to support you.
That's what we do.
(35:23):
We have a group of us thatwe've come from other groups and
we're still.
We're going to.
We're going to continue meetingmonthly to support each other
and collaborate and just talkabout podcasting or other things
.
But, oh gosh, that support isso important and I think we saw
each other at PodFest it justamplified it.
Speaker 2 (35:34):
Yes, I mean.
There is nothing like theenergy that you get from another
human being in your presence.
Speaker 1 (35:53):
I was nominated.
Rebecca was nominated forseveral awards and it was really
for independent women andnon-binary podcasters.
So what was it?
It was a room full of mostlywomen and non-binary podcasters.
There were a few men theresupporting and just the energy
in that room for every award andthe nominations and who won.
(36:14):
It was just electric.
We were screaming and jumpingup and we were all dressed up.
It was such an amazingexperience.
I haven't had an experiencelike that, probably ever related
to a professional aspect of myworld.
I definitely haven't.
It was just, yeah, I think itwas such a great way to kick it
off because we all just weregoing off that energy.
(36:36):
But also when you won, therewas like this I think all of us
who have known you, have beenany part of your journey, felt
like we won too.
It was just so exciting.
Didn't you pick up my phone?
So I was sitting next to Rebeccaand she had been recording
everything and she was recordingand it was hers.
(36:57):
She was nominated for aPeople's Choice Award and she
pushed hard and we all voted forher every day and so they
announced it and she, like,jumped up with her phone and
then she threw it down on thetable to run up to receive the
award.
So I picked it up and then Irecorded her whole accepting the
award and everything.
It was so funny she turned itinto a reel.
It was amazing.
(37:17):
Oh, that was.
It was so funny, she turned itinto a reel it was amazing.
Speaker 2 (37:20):
Oh, that was yeah.
Look, I was so surprised.
I was like, please win, Pleasewin.
I've never won an award beforein my life.
I want to win and everybody wasvoting.
But let me tell you, that tooka lot of work.
It took a lot of work to beconsistent on social media and
asking people to vote for youand it's.
(37:43):
It was hard too, like I wasembarrassed but I was excited at
the same time, but I was alsoembarrassed to post it and get
that attention and it was scaryto ask people to vote for me and
it was scary to ask people tovote for me, right?
Speaker 1 (38:02):
But I did it and it paid off, but it also helped you
grow.
Speaker 2 (38:05):
in a way, it did it.
It pushed my limits.
It took me just being nominated, and asking people for votes
took me out of my comfort zone,because that's not something
that I would normally ask peopleto do.
Speaker 1 (38:25):
Right, and you know, the one thing that you wouldn't
know, I didn't know until I wasa podcaster is most podcast
awards are you self-nominate.
I mean, people can nominate you, but a lot of them you actually
pay a fee and nominate yourself, like especially some of the
really big ones.
And so I know one.
I wasn't nominated by someoneelse, but there was one I had
nominated myself because I wastold that's what you do.
I'm like, well, that's so weird, but if that's what everybody
(38:45):
does, then yeah, I want to beproud of what I've created and
do it too.
But I think for you it was thataspect of you pushed.
You asked and people responded.
Speaker 2 (38:56):
Yes, yes, and then just the support was
overwhelming.
The support was overwhelming.
And then that just goes to showwho your listeners are.
And then other people weresharing it and they're probably
like what's this?
Why am I going to vote for her?
Well, let me listen to thatpodcast, right?
Speaker 1 (39:14):
Yeah, absolutely.
Speaker 2 (39:15):
There's a download.
Speaker 1 (39:23):
If you listen for four minutes counts, so just
push play.
You don't even have to payattention.
No, really, I know to listen,but you know everybody plays the
game too well, I think what wehave said through all of this is
podcasting is such anincredible platform.
It can be very healing, it canbe motivating, it can do so much
(39:43):
.
But it's okay to be scared,it's okay to try things, it's
okay to change, it's okay to doother things, because we're both
examples of you.
Do it, what works for you, whatyou like, what people respond
to.
It's all just a part of theprocess, but community is what's
really most important.
Speaker 2 (40:01):
Yes, I agree, Start messy, but start, Do it how you
want to do it.
There are no podcasting police.
No matter what they say or whatyou hear from anyone, there are
no podcasting police.
There is no one that's going tocome up to you and say you did
from anyone.
There are no podcasting police.
There is no one that's going tocome up to you and say you did
(40:22):
that wrong and give you a fineNope.
Yeah, I think everybody wantsto know this is how you do it.
Speaker 1 (40:30):
This is how you don't do it.
No, there are 10 different waysto do everything, and you pick
what works for you, what feelsright.
Speaker 2 (40:36):
Yes, I love that.
And then the podcasters, likethe big people, like Mel Robbins
, kathy Heller, jenna Kutcher,all of them, they have an entire
team, yeah, so it looks thatgreat.
And it sounds that greatbecause they got the best of the
(40:57):
best people doing it, but youknow what you got.
You got yourself and you arejust as awesome, so remember
that you can do exactly whatthey do.
Speaker 1 (41:12):
Thank you so much for listening to this episode.
It means so much to me to haveyou here.
Make sure you don't miss anynew episodes of the podcast.
Hit, subscribe wherever you arelistening right now and new
episodes will automatically popup in your feed as they come out
.
If you enjoyed this episode,please share it with friends and
family, and make sure to leavea rating and review wherever you
(41:34):
are listening.
That will help the podcast togrow.
Come on over to Instagram atpodcastyourstorynow to keep up
with me and the podcast so thatyou can be ready to podcast your
story now.
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