QF41: The Biggest Laughs with Julie Goodwin!

This Quick Fix is pure chaos in the best way: we’re parked up at the beach, the dogs are everywhere, there’s suspicious Labrador mischief, we test out bone-conduction headphones (through our actual bones, obviously), and then spiral into a very scientific debate about bears, men, and Hemsworths.

No plan- and a stack of laughs!!! If this doesn't put a smile on your face - go see your doctor! 😂

Remember, if you’d like to hear the whole episode it came from, just search for Episode 41 of The Podvan Podcast!

𝙉𝙀𝙒 𝙀𝙋𝙄𝙎𝙊𝘿𝙀𝙎 𝙚𝙫𝙚𝙧𝙮 𝙈𝙊𝙉𝘿𝘼𝙔

PATREON EXCLUSIVE episodes for members at podvan.com.au/members

Episode Transcript

(00:03):
Quick fix with rabbit. This whole getting the van
things become like a little catch phrase.
People are having fun saying getin the van.
I can't. I don't want that as a catch
phrase. I don't want that on T-shirts
and stuff. It's like when we used to do
obese, the outside broadcast, the radio station would sit on a
couch and when you've got the headphones on and it can be all

(00:26):
noisy as out around around there.
But when you're sitting there onthe couch and it's just you and
I with our headphones on, we canjust have our own little
conversations and everyone out there can't hear what we're
saying to each other. And it's that's what it feels
like here. We need to come back here on the
day when there's just heaps of people walking past and stuff
and just run our own commentary.Oh yeah, and you.
Know it's like people watching, you know?

(00:46):
Like he comes, I'll make come onat the football.
No, he he's. You mean for a swim?
Yep, good run. That makes more sense.
No it doesn't. Why would you run when you could
swim? It's looks freezing out there,
but. You know what the water
temperature would be warmer thanthe air temperature today.
You. Do that, don't you?
You go out there and through winter.

(01:07):
I was there yesterday in Terry it.
Was raining yesterday. We'll get wet.
Oh no. Hell no.
That was beautiful. Look at the sun coming out for
us here today. So we just had Maureen come up
and say hi. Yeah.
Hi, Maureen. She'll be listening.
She listens to your. There dog goes.
Hello is. It bad if you had to choose two

(01:30):
breeds a doll. Ohh.
Look at you, too. Hello.
You wanna come on, puppies? Sorry, we can't help ourselves
when dogs. No, I say we.
Oh, God. One of the dogs just ran off in
the van. Oh, no.
He's having a chase. Did you lose somebody's dog?
Yeah. 'Cause he was getting off the
lead. So I can come in and say hi,
lie. Oh what do we got?
Border Collie. Get into, then get into that

(01:52):
very. Hello.
How are you? And what about you?
You look crazy. Hi you want.
Me to get that crazy enough to come in.
There. Yeah, yeah.
I might look crazy but I've got a better hand on me shoulders
than that bloke. That's right.
That one was frothing at the mouth a little bit, so I'm glad
that one hadn't given me. That's what he just said as

(02:13):
well. The dog just said that as well.
That. Blokes all the all the men did
with the dogs. He's like that's around.
That bloke was frothing at the mouth.
I'm glad you didn't get in there.
It's you have had man flu again.Second run of man flu in the
last month. Oh.
Bad thing, I'm not in an enclosed space with you or
anything. Are the doors open?

(02:33):
Flopping. It's like being 2 metres apart
on the beach. We're social distancing here.
There's about 1200 mil. And there's 1.5 metres between
your germy mouth and my non germy mouth.
I don't think so. No, I don't think so either.
Oh. Well, oh man.
Well, the weather has cleared upfor us.
Downhill gorgeously. I thought it was Lion Island.

(02:55):
We didn't even know about that. I don't know.
I don't know this area. Well, you got it until.
Why it's called Lion Oh. My God, it looks like a lion.
Lion down, yes. So I don't know if it's Lion,
LION or LYIN. Yeah.
Lion Island. You can't hide.
You're a Lion Island. Oh, another dog.
Oh, hey, Hank. Good day guys, wouldn't be funny

(03:19):
if people had. Those tags, yeah.
I guess that's like a name tag when you're in the business.
Thanks. Just like, right?
I want to come in. Ohh Hank, come in.
Hank, what's to get in the van? Get in the.
Van Hank, Yeah. Do we go on him?
Do we want him just? As if you wouldn't want Hank.
He's a big fat black Labrador. Don't call him fat.

(03:40):
He. Can I only that word?
I hate that word and I only use it with labradors.
Hello. Hank, get in the van.
Hank. Come on, buddy.
He's like, I'd like to, but you don't.
You guys. Hey, don't ask guys.
Hello. Hello, Hank.
This is the dog cast. Hank reminds me of Sammy Wijiwo
show my my little bling big black Labrador.

(04:02):
Ohh he. Likes different he.
Likes the knobs and sliders haveto put.
You bet. Oh, Hank's got it.
Of course he's got his own Instagram.
Hey. Hank, I will come here.
We're getting our picture taken,mate.
I. Will follow the living daylight.
Teddy come in, come in and grab a grab a photo.
Hey, Hank, come here. Come here, buddy.
He's like, I can hear you. I can't see you over here.

(04:22):
Hey. This way, this way.
Good boy. Hey boy, good boy.
You guys. Pod band podcast.
Perfect. Yeah, it's advertised.
One of these and then now you don't have to remember it.
Oh yeah. Yeah.
And then? So you said you know us from the

(04:44):
radio. Yeah.
So now we've got the voices. Now you can put these.
Yeah. The voices, Yeah.
Oh, that's so cool. You.
As I mean it's. A pretty nice office.
Yeah. Check out the podcast.
I will. Thanks.
Guy, hey, no worries. Thank you.
You too. Hank messed up my rug.
No, no, it was Border Collie didthat was it?

(05:06):
Yeah, it's been. I don't wanna go blaming Hank.
Well, no. Yeah.
Yeah, blame. He can't play.
Hank is blameless. Imagine Hank listening to this
podcast. No border, Ned.
Percy called me fat. He says I'm messed up.
He's a rug. I'm gonna sue him.
Oh my God. Oh boy.

(05:26):
Oh. What?
Labradoodle. Oh no.
Inbound. Oh Oh my God, that thing's
straight up psycho. Dudes try to walk it past the
other dogs. It's just bouncing.
It's just bouncing in all. Directions all means get it in
here. You know I won't.
We were talking. About Dog Land, we were talking
about Lion Island. We were talking about Sunny Day.

(05:48):
So is that actually separated from the mainland?
Yeah, doesn't look like it is. It's an island.
Yeah, All right, mate, that's. Yeah, it, yeah, it is.
What's on it? Can you do anything on it?
Well, like. I don't know.
I mean, there's trees from what I can see from here.
There's an island, there's you know.
A resort? Yeah.

(06:09):
Yeah, swim up pool. I've not heard of this.
I want to stay on Wine Island. Oh, maybe you could.
I don't know. Maybe someone listening can tell
you. Aren't poodles just so weird?
That's just they're awkward. OK, what life?
Pod life? Two teachers with balls and
shouted pod life at us. With two Fleuro witches hats.

(06:32):
I don't know where he's going with those.
Do you know he's very sun smart as well?
Do you notice the sunscreen on his face?
It's not fully rubbed in, but had on.
Got his hives. He's a safety conscious young
man just. Walking around in hives with a
couple of cones. Just in case, you never know
when you might need to throw down a witch's cone and just
keep an area. Safe.
I remember having a couple of cones down the beach.

(06:53):
Rabbit. I don't, I'm joking.
My dad listens to his podcast. It's just a joke.
Yeah, that was someone else's I was holding it for.
Them I need to. Ask Dad.
Stop. Listening to the podcast, 'cause
everybody. And then he'll say, yeah, he
shot me a text the other day. He goes, oh, I love that podcast
with Shane Fitzsimmons on it. And I was like, it's just a

(07:16):
reminder to me that, oh, that's right, Dad listens.
Watch me sound. Disappointed.
Do you think he is on a scale of1 to 10?
Only up to 10. Oh, can we make the scale
bigger? We can.
We can make the scale as big as your dad likes.
Yeah, dad, Dad, it's so good. He goes through his walks.
He goes on like 16 K walks and stuff.

(07:38):
Why is that triple or quadruple heart bypass?
Yeah, that was a lot. Yeah, a a lot of bypassing
happened and now he's he's out now.
His heart's just a roundabout. It's just all bypasses.
Yeah, yeah, yeah. Pretty amazing.
That works, but yeah. That he's come through and now
he. Walks 16 KS a day is that for

(07:58):
his heart did was he doing? That before Oh yeah, he's a
Walker. But yeah, he's he's fitter and
healthier than I highly recommend it.
You know where I like to walk tothe car.
I'm not a. Walker.
No, Mick is a Walker, Is he? He loves walking and I Does he
do it? Oh yeah.
Oh, I didn't know he does. He walks the dogs every morning,
but also when we're on holidays he's like, he's lining up the

(08:20):
walks and I'm like. Dude, oh, we're so the same.
I just don't get it. I don't.
I don't like if I need to. Go somewhere.
Yeah, yeah, yeah. Like if I'm at Kmart and I need
to go to big W, that's. Quite a hike I'm gonna have, you
know. Gina told me she reckons that
walking around a shopping centre, those steps don't count

(08:41):
in your step count for the day. Load of course they count.
There's no sitting on my garmentfor shopping centre walking.
There are. Those are the only steps I do
when. When I down the aisles, if I.
Go to Vegetables. Breads, cereals, pasta, oils.
International aisle. Yeah, yeah.
Steps. OK.

(09:02):
I mean, I you go down the international aisle, I've been
to South America, I've been to Asia, I've been to Europe.
And I walked the lot. I walked.
The whole thing. Take that, Mick.
Yeah, take that. But I saw your headphones just
before and Maureen, who stopped by to say hi just before, she
had the same type of headphones.Are they bone conductor ones?
Yes, they are. They are so.

(09:24):
Show me, I'll do. I'll do a little show, hey.
While we're speaking about good headphones, how are yours there?
They're. Still shit.
So I sent an e-mail to. I'm not even.
Not to Anko he. Said listen.
We've been bagging out your headphones.
We use your headphones. No.
Pay me money and I'll start saying nice things about them.
No, there's no amount of money that could.

(09:47):
So what's your price? 20.
Bucks like that movie Indecent Indecent Proposal.
Ohhh yeah. What's your price?
Everyone's got a price for everything anyone could.
You sell your soul for to say nice things about these
headphones. 200 bucks. 200 bucksand you can afford to go buy a
better pair of head. So the ones I want to get,

(10:08):
they're $189 each. So for you and the guest, and I
guess I'll get some as well eventhough mine are fine.
And then one for in my editing studio.
So I need 4 pairs of these headphones now.
That's going to cost me 500 bucks ish.
Right, it's closer to 800. Actually, it's 750.
Six. That's right.
No, because the ones I was looking around 119, but then I
saw some other ones that are 189.

(10:30):
It's going to be one of those two.
And then someone said to me, you, you, you have cameras
recording in there. You're the stuff's up online all
the time. Reach out to some headphones
peoples like Sennheiser or. Those or Anko?
Yeah. Yeah.
No, not Anko. What?
There is headphones supplier. Everything supplier, there is

(10:50):
nothing you can't buy that they don't have in Anko.
And so and so did I sent some emails out and I just went, hey,
listen, just ask I'm going to goout and buy these headphones
anyway. But if you want to have them on
the videos on this thing and andeverything and no one has
replied. But once you've gone in with, if
you don't want to give them to me for free, I'm going to pay

(11:12):
you money for them anyway. Yeah.
And they're like, fine, do that.Yeah, do that.
We'd actually, we'd much rather.We'd prefer you.
Paid for them by headphones, yeah.
Listen, our business model, we make stuff, you buy it.
Thank you for playing. We make things and you give us
money for the things. And then we give.
You the thing. What's this other option you're

(11:33):
offering us? So we make these things, and
then we give them to you, and you give us.
Nothing. Nothing.
Let's go with option A. That's what they have all said.
Listen, I just put it out there.You never know.
Can I tell you these guys shocks?
I reckon I should be on Commission with them because I

(11:54):
have gotten so many people onto these headphones, including my
parents who are technology averse.
I need to try them now. The great thing is you can share
them around with people because they don't go in your ears.
No shocks SH OK. Oh God I'm going to lose my Anko
deal if I talk about these. You don't have an Anko deal,
rabbit. Just because it feels like they

(12:14):
gave them to you because they were $2.99 doesn't mean they did
give them to you. So these ones, there's a band
that goes around the back of your.
Neck so you you know, I'm. I've never liked the ones that
go in because for start, I thinkI've got little ear holes.
Yeah, and so they hurt. But also, I've always been quite
anxious about that feeling of being isolated from the world

(12:35):
around me. If there's a bus bearing down on
me, I want to hear the sound of my own screaming as I the
pavement. Quite often busbearing beach
surprise, I wander around the middle of the road.
There's a tractor going past us right now.
It's see it. Can't happen if a tractor is.
There can only hear it as it's almost coming through the front
window because we're wearing over the ear headphones, right?

(12:56):
That's been coming towards us for an hour.
Oh. Wow.
And we didn't even know. Didn't even know.
If the noise isolation cancellation feature in the
anchor headphones. Actually I heard it now ago.
Before he started up. But they, so these, they're also
good for safety, right? If you're particularly for

(13:17):
women, if you go for a walk at night and you want to listen to
music but you still want to knowwhat's going on, if you want to
hear footsteps, if you want to hear, you know, a dog barking,
you know so. Yeah, I saw these, Maureen when
she had them on just then. So they go, they go around the
back of your neck and then there's a thing that goes over
the top of your ears and then this bit at the front that has
the speakery bit on it, I guess.They sit on you jawbone, on your

(13:38):
jawbone, and that's where the sound goes into your brain.
Stop it. It goes through your bones and
it vibrates all the things in your ears that need to be
vibrated and it's beautiful sound I.
Didn't even know I needed my ears to be vibrated.
Well, yeah, that's how sound works.
There's vibrations going on youreardrums, but.
So wait, I could cut out the middleman here?

(13:59):
Wait. OK so oh God no.
I just had a thought on the whatabout if I now I'll need someone
to help me build this in you're probably going to need a
subwoofer of some sort but if I built in these bone conductor
type yeah headphones into the seating in the pod van so it.
Comes up through you like your ass bones.

(14:21):
Yeah, through your hips. Yeah, it's connected to your
spine bone. Spine, bone.
Spine. Bone connected to the neck bone.
Neck bone connected to your head.
Bone. Head bone, your head bone and
then you connected to. Your jaw bone.
Your jaw bone is connected to your.
Ear bone. Ear bones.
And and that's what it's all. About well through the air
holes. And we've got the title for the

(14:42):
episode. But yeah, that's a great idea.
Mine bone conduction. Bone conduction underneath you,
like you'd feel it in your very oh God.
They've got them at the Movies Now.
The seats. Where have you been in those?
Straight. How the seat will vibrate?
You know, I spent the first halfof the movie I went to without

(15:02):
thinking. The kid behind me was kicking my
seat. I nearly punched him in the
head. What's just like kid keeps
kicking myself, I swear to God and.
You get up in your move seats and they didn't still vibrate.
He's followed me. No, but these things, I wear
them to bed at night. I do a meditation at night and
they're so comfy that I I can drift off to sleep with them on

(15:23):
and wake up. And you wouldn't I'm.
All sleeping with headphones on either.
If they're the big ones like these, obviously they're the
ones in your ear holes as well. No, I can't.
Hurt. Where's your fire?
Something up on your phone so that I can listen to these
because I want to know what these these things are like.
You know what? I really like the idea of the
new. There's these bows, sunglasses.

(15:45):
Yeah, same. Oh, no, that's not bone
conduction. They've got little, they've got
speakers in them, but the speakers are directed at your
ear holes. And we say ear holes a lot on on
this podcast. Sure.
Do. And it's crazy, right?
It sounds like you've got the headphones in your ears, but
they're not. They're just, they're
sunglasses, but someone's standing.
Like if I had music blasting outof these sunnies.

(16:08):
Yeah. It sounds really loud to me but
you wouldn't even hear it sitting just there.
It's directed so straight into my ear holes all.
Right, so you should play music if you pop those on.
Oh my God, they're vibrating. Yeah, well, that's music.
Just put them just the. Fun things You could.
Yeah. All right.
What are you doing? Why are you sitting on them?

(16:30):
Stop it. Oh my goodness.
Aren't they good? Can you hear the song?
I can hear a tiny bit of. Oh my God, it's making my ear
bones vibrate. Am I shouting?
Yes, but you can still hear what's going on around you.

(16:52):
No, I can't. Well, if you put earplugs.
In reading you right now, this is like that whisper challenge
thing. Oh, I got that.
Why do you want me to stand in the far queue?
Oh, you totally breed I. Wonder if these would be good
for the podcast? What do you?
Mean. Well, I mean literally, I cannot

(17:13):
hear a word you're saying right now.
This is a terrible idea. You said it's good for you, said
it's good for some. Having a shout over the music.
Can you not hear it? That is so loud and tiny.
Tiny bit of bleed there he is, but there's probably not.
Are you talking? I can't hear you.
OK, This is ridiculous. Is that better?
That's better. Well, now I can't hear the.

(17:33):
Music on full volume? Yeah, Listen to them from full
volume. That's interesting.
Yeah, they're good. So you can hear me now.
Oh yeah, Yeah. Yeah, yeah, but I can hear music
a little bit louder. Please.
No, not that loud. Down a bit.
Yeah. Are you?
Can you hear me? Yeah, fully hear the, but I've
still got the song going as well.
Yeah, but is that weird if you're talking to me and I'm

(17:56):
dancing? No weird, but usually.
Just constantly. You look like you're scratching
your back. You've got a.
Little shimmy going. On called dancing, I'm going to
use that as a move now I got. It the back scratch.
I'm going itch your back. Noise, people, Can we just pull
up and stare at the ocean beforetheir day?

(18:17):
Isn't it? It's good.
It's grounding, centering. Hold.
Me. Close.
And tie me down, Sir. That pretty sure those aren't
the lyrics. Oh, that's that's mildly weird
and freaky. Yeah.
But I did get, you know, we weretalking to Maureen about that

(18:38):
and how it's good for safety. She goes on trail runs.
Yeah. And she needs to know if there's
a bear. Hey, what's this whole thing
about the bear and the man thingat the moment?
Oh, it's basically would you rather be stranded in the forest
with a bear or a man? And they're asking this of
women, and almost all women are saying a bear.
Thanks. I think it depends which man.

(19:00):
Well. I mean, is it a Hemsworth?
That is not the point of the question, that Julie just ruins
a whole big thing that's. A philosophical question.
Yeah. Would you rather be run into?
Yeah, that's it. And what kind of bear?
Teddy bear? Grizzly bear?
Oh. Really.

(19:20):
That Winnie the Pooh. Koala Bear.
He's not a bear, Joseph. Koala Bear, not a bear.
True. But they're cute, like a bear.
But not all bears are cute, and all men are cute.
So is it a Hemsworth? Same thing of men.
Are they asking men, would you rather run run into a woman or?
A bear? I don't know that anyone has

(19:43):
asked that question, but what? What animal were you going to
say? I.
Don't know, I'm just trying to think.
What wouldn't you want to run into on the well, a bear.
Well, yeah. Yeah, but then no one's going to
choose a bear in the other example which is not being used.
Exactly. To the men, would you rather run
into a woman on a trail or a bear than 0 men saying a bear a

(20:05):
bear? I wouldn't think so.
Not too many. There might be some.
There might be some who've been burned.
And almost have to be the like something that you really want
in the man example, would you rather run into a woman or?
Triple touch sundae. Alright, that'll do us for this

(20:31):
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