Episode 25: "Filtered": Beauty, Body Image, Botox & Being Real in a Touched-Up World

Episode Description:

In a world of filters, fillers, and constant comparison, how do we raise daughters to feel strong, beautiful, and worthy—exactly as they are?

This week, we’re taking a real and unfiltered look at beauty, confidence, and the body stories we carry. From the first moments we became “body aware” to how that awareness has evolved through motherhood, we open up about the subtle ways society shaped us—and how we’re breaking the cycle for our girls.

We’re talking:

• The first time we became self-conscious about our bodies
• What actually makes a woman feel good (beyond the mirror)
• The love/hate dance with filters, Botox, and enhancement
• Scripts and strategies for raising confident daughters
• Simple “mirror moments” and daily practices to repair your own body story

Our goal? To start seeing ourselves with more kindness—and to model that for the next generation.

💗 Pink Spotlight
Each week, we highlight a moment, product, or practice that’s bringing us joy:

Kristina’s Pink Spotlight
Greenlight Card (for managing kids’ allowance)

Christina’s Pink Spotlight
U Beauty The Sculpt Arm Compound (surprisingly the best for tightening stomach skin!) Use code CHRISTINA for 20% off sitewide

Tune in for a heartfelt, honest conversation about self-image, confidence, and the healing work we’re doing—for ourselves and for our daughters.

Hey PIPAS! Send us a text for episode feedback, ideas, and questions!

Episode Transcript

(00:00):
I'm Christina and I'm team.
And this is the Pretty and PinkAgain podcast where Motherhood
meets rediscovery.
Hey.
Hi.
How are you?
I'm better now.
Oh, good.

(00:21):
Better now.
I wish sometimes our listenerscould see the behind the scenes
of what it takes to sometimesget us in these seats.
Like we're, I should have filmeda video of the last hour of me
laying on the floor, eating mysausage jig and cheese sandwich
with you trying to revive me.
We always pick a day where we'relike so ambitious and we're
like, yeah, let's record.
And we always, it always ends upbeing on a day where we have.

(00:44):
So she's chugging water out of awater bottle.
But it always ends up being on aday where we're like, we always
just have so much going on.
One of us always ends up havingso much going on.
And then the other one is tryingto bring the other one back to
life.
We could do it.
We're gonna do it today.
It's fine.
We'll record.
We're done today.
You were in the other, you werein the driver's seat.
Yes, I was the driver today.
So thank you for that.

(01:04):
Surprise me.
Thank you for getting stop.
Usually I'm running in sweatinglate.
Oh my God.
A mess.
I don't know if our listenershave picked up on this.
You are very funny.
I am not you, but No, you arevery funny.
You have such good dry humor.
It's like you have greatone-liners.
It's, you make me laugh.

(01:25):
I feel like your humor revivesme and that is like one of my
favorite things about you isyour humor and love you and our
ability to laugh.
To the point where I crysometimes.
I'm like, tea, eat a breakfastsandwich.
We've got it.
We've got it.
Okay.
We have got it.
Oh my God.
But tell me, tell me why you'refrazzled today.

(01:48):
Okay.
We just came off of a familyvacation.
Yeah.
You were away last week.
So I keep seeing these likememes and Instagram reels about
oh, you have 18 summers withyour kids.
And, you know, oh, my oldest is12.
I'm only gonna have six moresummers left.
I, my sisters and I were like,maybe we should make a reel
because I'm almost 39 and westill travel with our parents.

(02:09):
Yeah.
You guys were all together withyour parents, right?
So my parents rented a house andNarragansett and we like, all
went, my, my three sisters andI, my, my one sister has three
kids.
Her husband we all piled intoone house and it wasn't like a
massive house.
It was like three bedroomsupstairs, one for each daughter
and like their significantother, there was a big I don't

(02:30):
even know what, like a loft roomfor all the kids and they
flopped in there.
And then my parents weredownstairs and it was, it was
full house.
It was a house.
I know.
It's so fun.
It's it, all of those memoriesare, they were wonderful,
special, wonderful memories.
But I am, we just got back lastnight, but I am toast.
Toast today.
Like just I'm pooped.

(02:51):
I know.
That's what happens.
We've been talking about thisall summer.
It's like you get the funmemories, which sometimes I
think after time passes you canlook back on something and like
you really remember the funmemories of it.
And you don't necessarily alwaysremember the feelings of being
overwhelmed and being exhaustedand all of the stuff that comes
with that, but.

(03:12):
It's too fresh in your mindright now.
I know.
No, you had a great time.
I had a great time.
I had a great time.
My children had a great time.
They, we have these electricscooters.
They're like adults.
You know the ones you would seelike on the side of the road in
Boston or New York City?
Yeah, we have them.
My in-laws gave them to the kidsas like a Christmas present ago,
but we don't use them because inour neighborhood it's so hilly.

(03:33):
Yeah.
It's, you need like flat, youneed a nice beach town.
That's exactly right.
Yeah.
You do.
Yeah.
So we brought, I was like a lastminute decision.
I was like, I'm gonna throw thescooters in the back of the
truck.
We'll see if we use them.
Oh, they were the best thing.
Oh, that's fun.
And even I was scootering aroundon that.
Cute.
And there was like tennis andpickleball courts right next to
the house.
So every day we all got up.

(03:53):
We played tennis, we playedpickleball.
It was, everybody got RhodeIsland Beach sweatshirts and.
We ate so well and now so fun.
I'm in the bathroom every twoseconds and my body's I know
your body's adjusting home.
Yeah.
Hi.
Hi.
Hi.
Welcome back.
Welcome back.
I know the return home aftervacation is just always, it's
were you, do you feel like youwere a little bit ready to come

(04:15):
back?
Were you ready to get more intoYeah.
I came, I was supposed to comeback today.
I came back last night.
I was definitely ready to comehome and now we have a quick
turnaround'cause we're going tovisit my husband's family.
We're leaving tonight.
So we'll be there for a fewdays.
Yeah.
So no wonder you're spinning.
So I'm, it's.
Spinning.
It's a lot.
It's okay.
You're here.
I'm here now.
You made it.
Thank you know I almost had tocancel on you.

(04:35):
It so nice.
Because I was like, it's nice tosee you.
I didn't, I know.
I didn't think that we weregonna be able to record.
We try to prep and advance someof these just because our
schedules get so crazy.
But it's nice to see you.
I know when our schedules don'talways jive there's because our
kids are different ages.
Exactly.
Yep.
Like I do my work in theevening.
Yep.
In the evening.
You can't, I'm with the kids.

(04:56):
That's when you're mommy.
Yep.
And I have not, and during theday when I can't even blink.
Right.
And during the day when you areworking mm-hmm.
i'm usually with my kids aredoing what?
So sometimes we like have tojust, wait, there's like a
delay.
I know.
Like you'll respond to me hourslater and then I respond to that
hours later.
We dump each other.
Yeah.
We brain up on each other atcompletely different times.
I know.
That's always so funny.

(05:17):
I know.
When you have a workingrelationship, it's, you gotta
figure it out.
But yeah.
That's okay.
Yeah.
All right.
So enough about me.
What about you?
How is this the week?
So I had a fun weekend.
I teased this a little bit on myInstagram too, but I ended up
dropping my kids off at myparents' house for the day.
My husband was having somefriends over that were visiting
from out of town, and so wejust, and that was like planned

(05:39):
for a while, so I was like, letme take the kids.
Like we'll get we'll use itinstead of us like going
somewhere.
Yeah.
I was like, let's actually havethe house to ourselves for the
night.
And then he was hosting somefriends and I actually used it
to catch up with a girlfriend ofmine, Marissa.
Oh.
From Style Cusp.
Who is back from Florida.
She does like back, she's backand forth from Florida and.

(06:02):
It was so nice because I waslike, this is the first time
I've seen her since I've hadkids where we weren't on a
timeline.
I wasn't like, I have to rushback.
I only have a babysitter untilthis time.
Or you know, like I wanna getback for bedtime.
It was so nice.
So the kids were with my parentsand then we got to have a day.
That's awesome.
Where did you meet her?
So we went down to Westport,Connecticut.

(06:23):
We ended up having lunch there'cause it was on the way.
I dropped my kids off at myparents' house and then we were
looking for somewhere cute wherewe could have lunch.
And then we literally had.
A casual three hour lunch, whichis like, what happens?
That's the best.
Which was so nice.
'cause we weren't in a rush.
And then we went shopping and mylittle tip was gonna be that I
actually went denim shopping.
For the first time where I wasactually trying on multiple

(06:45):
jeans at a time.
Yes.
And I was like, this is lifechanging.
Mm-hmm.
I find that sometimes, like Ilove the ease of being able to
order something, but denim is,denim is an in person, not one
of those things de thing.
Yeah, I agree.
Denim is just something whereyou need to grab 10 and try them
all on.
And I would've never been asefficient as I was on the
weekend.

(07:05):
Like being able to buy a pair ofde Did you try any different
styles that you liked?
I tried a bunch of differentstyles.
I was looking for something veryspecific.
I was looking for a very comfypair of denim that.
Lengthwise could work with avariety of different shoes.
So I wanted them full length.
I wanted the fabric to be likeslightly stretchy.
So there was a little bit ofgive So that like rag and bone

(07:27):
soft?
Yes, Yes.
So I ended up I ended up gettinga pair of page jeans.
Ooh.
Which I haven't tried on a pairof page jeans forever in years.
And I was going in likeexpecting to like other brands
of denim.
I had other brands in my mindand I grabbed a bunch of
different styles.
All of the ones that I would'veordered mm-hmm.
were not ones that worked.

(07:48):
And so it was just one of thosethings where I was like,
sometimes you just need to getin the store and try on.
Because when you're online, whenyou're online shopping, you
categorize by your size andbrands that you typically know
how they fit and what you like.
But then you know, you would'venever tried this.
It's a crapshoot a lot of thetimes.
And sometimes what ends uphappening, even with the
different, like even with thedifferent washes mm-hmm.

(08:10):
the fabric is different and sothings just.
Fall differently on you.
It just, it really depends.
So it was really nice to have,oh, I can't wait to see how they
looked on you.
Yeah.
I ended up grabbing a pair.
They were, they're like a nicewide leg, but they're not too
wide.
They're like a little bitstretchy, but they hug in all of
the right places and they're Iwas just really excited to grab

(08:30):
a pair that actually fits mybody now.
Mm-hmm.
It wasn't a chore to try'em onit wasn't like I had to, now I
don't have to send back 10 pairof jeans that didn't fit.
It was just so easy.
So sometimes you gotta go out inthe store.
It was amazing.
All right.
Where did you go?
Oh, it's like a boutiquey storein Westport.
Yeah.
We went I popped around a coupleof different stores.
The store I ended up gettingthese from was anthropology,
because they carry a ton ofdifferent ones.

(08:51):
But I was like, this is just.
This was a win.
It was so nice.
Oh, I love that.
I'm glad you caught up with her.
I know she's a special friend toyou.
I know she's gonna be on thepodcast soon, probably at the
end of August.
Oh, that's awesome.
I know, I'm really excited andit Nice staff time in person
too.
Yeah, she's gonna be sitting inme one of these chairs.
I'm so excited.
I'm so excited to talk to her.
I know.
It's gonna be really fun.
I'm excited to like almost sortof interview the two of you.

(09:13):
Oh yeah.
That'll be fun.
Because you guys have reallycome together and you boost each
other up and like you are bothsuch girls, girls, and in such a
competitive industry.
Mm-hmm.
The two of you have been able toput all that sort of bullshit
behind you.
Yeah.
And just be good friends.
It's a lot of what we talk abouton the podcast.
Yes.
So I'm really excited.
Yeah.
That's gonna be in a couple ofweeks.

(09:34):
Yeah.
And I'm excited to hear abouther podcast journey.
I know her wellness journey.
I know.
That'll be really fun.
She just seems like so light,like when you're around her, do
you just leave feeling lighter?
Yeah we, we actually talked alot.
That was like something that wetalked about a lot was just
sometimes.
You wanna leave people feelinggood.
And she's one of those peoplewhere I always leave and she

(09:56):
feels the same way.
Of course.
Of course.
Where you, you leave feelinggood.
You don't leave feeling, did Iovershare too much?
Did I say the wrong things?
Do I feel judged?
Yeah.
And I piss that person off.
Yeah.
Is there, did I leave feelingbadly about myself and no to any
of those things.
And that just shows that that'sa really good, healthy

(10:17):
friendship.
And yeah, it's, we keep sayingour motto like, I feel like the
summer is just quality overquantity.
And it's just a reminder of tojust pay attention to those
things, the people that you'rearound.
Okay.
So what are we gonna talk abouttoday?
I'm excited for this one.
This actually came at therequest mm-hmm.
of some PPAs.
Mm-hmm.
And we kind of combined somedifferent topics that people

(10:39):
were asking us to chat about.
Your friend had asked you aquestion and you asked it to me
last week.
So I think the question was whatage were you when you became
aware of your body?
Mm-hmm.
And.
Do you remember that feeling?
Do you remember how old youwere?
Yeah.
Do you remember what that feltlike to you?

(11:00):
And what did it mean to becomeaware of your body and then
layer that on?
When did you become aware oflike other people's bodies and
then what were like the messagesthat you heard and just what was
your relationship withself-image and image of others?
Yeah.
It's kind of like a bodypositivity chat today.
That's kind of what we're gonnatalk about.

(11:20):
But that word was not said tome.
It was not, no, it was not athing in the eighties and
nineties, I don't think.
We grew up, which we talkedabout in another podcast, but we
grew up in this in the very dietculture, very media heavy
paparazzi world, right?
Where it was like completelyacceptable to pick apart a

(11:42):
celebrity's body, the.
Tabloids were always all over.
If anybody like gained an inchor looked a little bit bloated
one day, it was completelyacceptable to just pick apart
that woman's body right in themedia in front of everybody.
And it was completely fine forany woman and men to say

(12:04):
whatever they wanted aboutsomebody else's body.
So I feel like we grew up inthis really delicate time of
consuming that information and Ican imagine what that did to all
of us internally, right?
And how we think aboutourselves.
And so I think that due to that,I definitely felt I don't
remember the exact point where Ibecame aware of my body in that

(12:27):
way, but I do remember.
Seeing magazines specificallyand seeing the verbiage and how
the media would speak to anotherwoman and being very aware of
that at a younger age.
Mm-hmm.
Like, Oh, this is not whatyou're supposed to look like due
to this messaging.
Oh.
Just the Oh, interesting.

(12:48):
Like, Just being aware of it.
Okay.
And I remember that just readingthings.
I'm like a big words person.
Yes.
And like words of affirmation ismy love language.
So when I see somethingnegatively written, I take that.
It's wow, okay.
That's not okay for her to lookthat way.
Okay.
You file that in the back ofyour mind.
Okay.
How do you feel about that?

(13:09):
So I am not a words.
Person.
I think I was more visual.
Mm-hmm.
So I was, I'll share this story,but I was, I told Christina this
last week, but I remember when Iwas 13, it was like the summer
before going into eighth grade,my mom bought me like a padded
bathing suit top.
And I remember loving how Ilooked in this padded bathing
suit top, and I wore it allsummer under all my clothes.

(13:32):
'cause it looked like I had likeboobs.
It was like a bra, like you woreit as a bra.
I wore it as a bra under all ofmy tops because it gave me
boobs.
Mm-hmm.
And I remember at that age beinglike, oh, okay, I like this
body.
You liked the way your bodylooked?
I liked the way my body looked.
Yeah.
And then as I got a littleolder, I was like, oh, I have
curly hair.
I'm short.
Mm-hmm.

(13:52):
I am not, I don't have like longstraight hair.
I don't have like, you know, itwas more so I'm short and I have
short, curly hair.
Mm-hmm.
And so as I got a little older,I, I thinned out a little, my
hair grew, whatever.
I got out of that like awkwardphase, but I never was aware of,
at that point I was not aware ofother people.

(14:13):
I was only aware of myself.
It is interesting that that'sthat, that transition happens,
right?
Yes.
Where you're just one day, likevery blissfully unaware of, I
guess, what you look like or Iwonder if that happens at
younger ages now than it didwith us.
You know, We're just soconsumed, I think that kids
right now could be so consumedwith media, but we were very
consumed with media, like Isaid, like the tabloids and the

(14:35):
kind of gossipy type of thingsand all the shows, and so I
think that we did grow up, likeof course, like in the nineties
with, it's not like we grew upnot seeing any of those images,
but I wonder if it's happeningearlier now than it did to us.
But I think that it sounds likeboth of us were probably middle
school-ish, right?
When you become aware of notonly your body, but everyone

(14:56):
else's body, and I guess therelationship between that.
But I think that, yeah, evenlike you said.
I might have not remembered mybody.
Mm-hmm.
Like my actual figure.
But I remember being like, okay,I have like fairer skin, so I
don't get a tan as easily asother people.
There's some things that youjust pick on yourself, yes.
Oh, that's interesting.
That's a little different.

(15:16):
I'm much more fair thaneveryone.
This was before, like selftanner, before anything, and.
You're like, oh, I have Casperwhite legs.
You know, like, that's, That'sdifferent.
Compared, I compared I know.
My biggest thing was I washairy.
Oh yeah.
And I hated being hairy.
Yeah.
My mom used, took me forelectrolysis when I was like 10
years old.
I had, or maybe I was 11 yearsold, but I had one eyebrow and

(15:38):
she was like, we are gonna fixthat.
Yeah.
We are gonna take you and you'regonna have two eyebrows.
Yeah.
Yeah.
But there's been so many thingsthat have so much, like more
technology.
I don't even think I had a hairstraight when I was in eighth
grade.
I think that I got, I definitelydid not straighten my hair until
I was in high school.
So I very much remember you wewere much more like of a natural

(15:58):
generation.
There were, and there alsowasn't, we had like 17 magazine
or maybe some of the other teenybopper magazines to look to, to
be like, what's the, like howcould we look our best?
Right.
Yes.
Sun in, yeah.
Sun in hair.
And I don't even think thatthere was self tanner.
There were no straightenersthere.
Nir, yes, there was Nir.
There was very limited.

(16:20):
Even makeup, you know, like, Idon't even feel like we ha I
don't even feel like Targetswere that big when we were
growing up.
No.
There wasn't know.
It was like, where do you getmakeup?
Like it was the makeup counteror Walmart for me.
Like it was, it just was verydifferent.
So it's funny, I feel like nowgirls would have so much more
access to YouTube videos or howto do things a different way.

(16:41):
And I feel like maybe they,that's why I feel like all girls
look so much better now than wedid when we were growing up.
But now there's also that addedpressure of at a young age you
need to do these things where wewere just a little bit more
carefree to yes, look the way wedid.
Yeah.
But I think the thing that'sconstant is that.
Everybody in both, times want tolook good and feel good, but

(17:06):
what that means in themessaging, I think we have to be
careful with.
Mm-hmm.
And now the, this like wholeglow up.
Like If you look at LindsayLohan, she's all the rage right
now.
I know.
And she looks amazing, insane.
And people are talking aboutthis glow up.
Yep.

(17:26):
But if she were to have hadplastic surgery done and she did
not look good, she would beridiculed and scrutinized for
bad plastic surgery or For sure.
Or bad lasers or bad, whatevershe's had.
Bad filler, bad Botox, bad,whatever she's had done.
But because she's done stuff tomake her look and it looks good,
natural.

(17:46):
Mm-hmm.
Right.
And natural, I'm using in airquotes because it's not natural.
No it's not.
We're the same age as her.
Yes.
It is not natural to not havewrinkles.
To not have bags.
Mm-hmm.
To not have gray hair when youare almost 40 years old.
It's just part of the genetics.
And trust me, I get Botoxbecause I wanna look a little

(18:08):
more youthful.
I'm not saying don't do it.
Do whatever makes you feel good.
But when you are doing it tolook natural, you have to be
aware that it's not natural.
It's not natural.
I know.
And it's interesting.
And honestly, even the LindsayLohan glow up.
She looks incredible.
Oh my God.
She really does.
I'm like, wow.
I mean, she, She really does.
And I do think because she isour exact age, like she's 39.

(18:31):
That's why, That's why I'mchoosing her because she's our
age feels very relevant.
Yes.
And relatable.
And, but I've also been likelooking like, wow.
Okay.
Comparing right?
Like myself, like where it'swow, okay, she looks good.
Her jaw is tight.
There's she just, her body looksgood.
She j It's just very interestinghow that immediately.

(18:55):
That messaging can flip onyourself, and then you almost
start to feel badly aboutyourself.
And okay, wow, she's 39 andshe's getting all this praise
for looking this way.
And so then does that mean thatI have to look that way in order
to get that sort of praise?
I mean, It's just, it'sinteresting how it's almost, I
don't know, it just feels, doyou stay in that feeling for a
long time though?

(19:16):
Or is it like more of a fleetingthought?
I think that this was like afleeting thought where she just
all of a sudden, okay that she'sjust it right now.
She's, everybody's talking abouther, and I think it's because of
that.
It's the exact age.
So it's just wow, everybody'stalking about how great she
looks for being a 39-year-old.
And I think that's the messagingtoo, is once you hit a certain

(19:38):
age, you get this.
She looks good for her age, typeof messaging.
Do you think that's where we arenow?
I do.
I do.
Yes.
I think that we're teetering onthat line for sure, because
that's been the messaging.
Like she's 39, she looks sogood.
I mean the, The age come playsin, right?
It's like you get to a certainage and your age becomes part of

(20:00):
your identity.
Mm.
Where it's she's 35, she looksgreat for 35, she's 40, she's,
it's like the age is justattached to a woman, right.
for the rest of their life oncethey hit a certain age.
It doesn't happen when you're inyour twenties, but I think once
you're in your mid latethirties, you're forever branded
as whatever age you are and howgood or bad you look.

(20:20):
Like that seems to be kind ofHollywood messaging.
Do you think that people shouldshare what they're doing?
Or do you think that thereshould be like privacy and
allowed.
That's a good question.
I feel, because I feel like forme, I could answer yes to both.
I feel split on it.
I think it's I think it's a fineline.

(20:40):
I think it's really great whensomeone shares what they've had
done and people are open aboutthings, but I don't think that
you should have to shareanything, right.
that you don't wanna share.
I think that could make you moreor less relatable.
Like I think that people relateand I think people like honesty
and they like when people arevulnerable and they like when

(21:01):
people, but I don't think justbecause you are a person that is
on the internet or in Hollywoodor what, that you have to share
anything.
It's not a requirement.
Yeah, I agree with that.
I think if she said oninterviews I just drank water.
Mm-hmm.
I would probably be like, oh,come on, I drink a shit load of
water.
And my jaw is not snatched likethat, but if she ref, chooses to

(21:24):
keep it to herself, then I guessI'm okay with that too.
Yeah.
I think I'm just in the middle.
I feel that same way.
It's it's up to you.
I think it, it's veryrespectable when someone is
honest, but it doesn'tnecessarily mean you have to
share.
If you don't want to share.
But I think that that could comewith backlash.
When people are, if they lie orif they aren't open about
things, then you're subject topeople picking you apart a

(21:47):
little bit more and say, okay,well obviously like we just
said, there's no way she justdrinks water to look that good.
Like we're kind of doubting it,but.
It's to each their own, really.
Right.
So we have girls.
Mm-hmm.
They watch everything we do.
They watch us put on lip gloss,they watch us put on heels, they
watch us get dressed, they watchus do our hair, they they watch
everything we do.

(22:08):
They watch us work out, I knowLayla's young, but I would
wonder she's a year and a half.
What she what you would say toher if she was like, mommy, why
do you work out?
Yeah.
It's honestly made me, shehasn't asked those questions
yet.
She's young.
But it would, it makes me, waymore self aware of how I think
about myself and how I speak tomyself, especially in front of

(22:31):
the kids.
I could say that to both, youknow, like Leo's my oldest he's
like a little boy, obviously,but I still don't want him
hearing me talk about myselfbadly, or, it's just interesting
even how young they are, likewhat they pick up on.
And what they notice, you know,like both of my kids have looked
at me sometimes when I'm wearingmakeup, you know, how different

(22:52):
I look.
Or Leo will say, oh, mom'swearing a dress.
You know, He'll just noticethings and say them out loud.
Yeah.
Why do you look so pretty today?
Yeah.
It's just, it's funny how evenso young they pick up on the
changes and, but having adaughter, it's kind of stressful
because if I pick apartsomething about myself and Layla
has that trait too, it's am Ipicking on her?

(23:15):
Are there things about, there'sthings about myself that I might
not love and.
It's, I sometimes see that shemight be having those features
too.
You know, Like I just said, likeI didn't love having super fair
skin and not being able to getlike a tan very easily.
People would say stuff about me,when I was little.
And both of my kids have veryfair skin.

(23:37):
And so it's like you start tojust be like, wow.
Is that gonna be something thatthey're uncomfortable with?
Is that gonna be something thatpeople might say about them?
Yeah.
I guess it's gonna have to beone of those things where you're
gonna have to just wait rightpatiently for your daughter to
say to you, mom, I don't likethis about myself.
Right.
You know, And then, and thatwould honestly break my heart.
'Cause as a mom, you, you thinkthat your kids are the world you

(24:00):
created them know Yeah.
To be just perfect.
Yeah.
Like you think that they'reperfect the way they are and
it's not in a braggy way, youknow, it's not in that sort of
way.
It's just that just like yourparents thought you were
perfect.
Yeah.
You think and you just loveeverything about them.
You know, you love everythingabout them.
Right.
Anything that might make themunique, like you might see
something and it makes themunique, it makes them, right?

(24:20):
But they might not likesomething about themselves.
And I would think that's aheartbreaking feeling as a
parent, right?
I haven't yet experienced itbecause of they're, they're so
young.
I have you.
So I haven't really experiencedthat yet.
But what I am playing aroundwith is like they watch my every

(24:41):
move.
The diet and the exercise aren'treally like triggers for me.
I don't do it for weight loss atthis point.
Like I'm just doing it for likemaintenance for strength.
So I've always, they always seeme working, do uh, downstairs in
the gym.
They do it with me.
It's not oh, mommy needs to runon the treadmill so I could eat
I don't have food noise or likemovement noise right now.

(25:01):
So there's not, that's not likea thing.
But what I do do is I alter theway I look every day.
I put, I straighten my hair or Icurl my hair or I put makeup on
or I contour my nose'cause Ifeel like I have a big nose and
these are things that mydaughters see me do.
Or I get Botox and I've takenthem to my Botox appointment.

(25:21):
They've come with me to AuntieCheryl's.
You know, Med spa, and those arethings that I know, especially
my one daughter is going to wantto try at some point.
You know?
Do you feel any sort of guilt,like feeling is this a bad
example or is this just part ofhow you are?
Are you comfortable enough justbeing like, this is who I am at

(25:43):
this point.
These are things that I like todo for myself and yeah, I think
I'm, I think I'm still trying tofigure that out.
Yeah.
When I was like a teenager and Iwanted to straighten my hair, I
remember my mom being like, butyou have curly hair.
You were born with curly hair.
Why are you trying to changethat about you?
So I'm just trying to acceptthat there are certain things

(26:04):
that we don't love aboutourselves.
Mm-hmm.
And our appearances that wewanna change a little bit or
enhance or what's the oppositeof enhance when you're
contouring?
Hide a little.
Hide.
Yeah.
Hide a little and.
My daughters are gonna wanna dothe same.
I think that there's things thatare completely fine, right?
I think that it's like a toughbalance because I think that

(26:28):
it's okay.
I think if it's a from withinthing and you are just
uncomfortable with something, ormaybe you wanna enhance or hide
or kind of disguise, maybedisguise.
Disguise, that's a better word.
I feel like that's a betterword.
Or just do something to makeyourself feel okay or feel
better.
I don't think that there's shamein that, but I also think that

(26:50):
if it's do, if you're doingsomething because some, somebody
else pointed something out,that's where it gets tricky.
If now you're only aware ofsomething and maybe embarrassed
or feeling shameful aboutsomething because somebody else
pointed it out, that becomeslike a weird line to so we do
not wanna be the ones pointingthat out For sure.

(27:10):
For our kids.
For sure.
For sure.
I think if it's always from awithin thing, that's okay.
And I don't like the message,which we've talked about here
too.
If you do wanna make a change,if you do wanna feel better
about yourself, I don't thinkthat should be ignored, right?
Because I do think that when youfeel good, some of that is
because you look good.
You, it's, it is like an outwardthing.

(27:32):
If you get dressed in themorning, if you're taking care
of your body, like those thingsare not negatives, but it
doesn't have to be everything,it doesn't mean that's the only
way you're gonna feel good aboutyourself.
I think it's just learning tohow to delicately talk about
those messages.
Right.
With your daughter Outwardlydisplay some of those things so
that it's, you're not justsaying one thing and doing

(27:53):
another.
You don't want your do.
'Cause kids pick up on things,everything like that.
You don't like, wanna lie.
You can't tell them, oh, youshould love yourself the way you
are when you're sitting theredoing things to improve your
appearance, which will maybeimprove your own mood.
It's contradictory to do that.
So it's gotta be challenging.
And again, we're just opening upthe discussion.

(28:15):
It's one of those things whichis like how far is too far?
Mm-hmm.
Because if you look at picturesand if you look at people around
you like.
It's a world that is full ofenhancements.
Mm-hmm.
I don't know about you, but Ifeel like I'm seeing less of an
inter Instagram filter now, orYes.
If there is a filter, you, it'slike an obvious thing.
Yes.

(28:35):
It's not oh, it's filtered, butit's real.
It's maybe it's less of thatnow.
Well, Content's definitelybecome much more real life, much
less edited and curated than itused to be.
So that doesn't surprise methat's what's happening and what
you're seeing.
It's, I think it's very obviouswhen people are using a filter,
you know?

(28:55):
And so I think, I'm definitelyseeing less of it too.
Right.
But just like simple.
I guess these are like simplethings like Botox fillers, like
some of the social media thingsare wrapped around in this
illusion of natural beauty,right?
What do you think about.
Like this whole natural beautylook or like looking natural

(29:18):
when really there's a lot thatgoes into I've seen looking
natural.
Yeah.
There's some reels where girlswill say, oh, a man told me I'm
so naturally beautiful.
And then they list all of the 50million things that they do that
make them have this naturalbeauty.
And I applaud that because I'mlike, yes, it takes so much, to
just upkeep and especially asyou age and everything.

(29:40):
So I, again, it goes back to thetransparency of I love that.
And that also just shows thatsome people are very, like
blissfully unaware of how muchpeople put on their looks, you
know, to get a natural sort oflook.
But that's tricky.
I know it is tricky.
Any, maybe it's'cause of wherewe live.
Mm-hmm.
But I don't think any of ourfriends in this area are like

(30:03):
super done up.
No.
Or super crazy or changing theirappearances.
So I don't ever feel like I haveto, yeah.
Keep up.
Even though I don't know if Iwould, but maybe I would.
Like sometimes I wonder like ifwe lived in a different part of
the country where, or like in LAor in Hollywood or in New York
or wherever, a place whereeverybody looked like a filter,

(30:24):
for sure.
If that would make me feel moreinsecure, I would definitely say
that.
That I could easily say that Iknow that I would like, that's
just, I think it is who you kindof surround yourself with and
what you're exposed to.
And I think that the more you'reexposed to something, you almost
get like blindness, so it's, ifthat's what you're seeing all of
the time, then.

(30:46):
That's what you usually wannado, right?
Because you're, it just becomesthe norm to you.
So you're seeing this and you'resaying, if you're seeing
everybody with facelifts right?
You're gonna look and eventuallysay that's the norm.
And so then you feel pressureof, okay, that's something that
I need to keep up with to alsolook that same way.
So I do think it probably variesarea to area, especially in our

(31:09):
country.
Mm-hmm.
Like I do think we're in thenortheast.
It's a little bit less, I thinkit's probably less is more
around here.
yes.
And if everybody was filled tothe brim with filler and looked
completely unnatural in airquotes, you would stand out
here.
It's not a look here.
Right now.
So maybe we're not probablyfeeling as much of that like

(31:31):
local pressure because it's notthe look here.
But I guarantee you, if you wentsomewhere else I would feel very
different.
Yeah, that's a good point.
That's a good point.
It just depends every area ofthe country, especially with
plastic surgery, like if you godown to Miami for example, like
the body type is very differentthan it is up here.
You're also just like in lessclothing just because of the

(31:53):
climate.
So you might feel pressure toget your boobs done if you were
in Miami, because that's the,look, I saw this funny video and
it was a woman at the airportdoing jumping jacks or something
with all of her luggage and shewas like, I'm going on spring
break, and I'm in my winterbody, so I'm trying to get in
shape before I get to Florida.

(32:14):
Yeah, I know.
We, yeah, we unfortunately havethe like eight month winter body
here where I know it's justfreezing and yeah, it's, I know,
it's just, it's very different.
I think it, I, I do think thatthat's where you live is
probably one of the most.
I guess important things forthis discussion, right?
Like where you live and whoyou're surrounded by and what

(32:34):
you see a lot.
But since you've grown up intonow you're a more competent
woman, you know that if you havea trip coming up, you know what
suntan, which what's it called?
Tan self-tan use.
Mm-hmm.
You know, What clothes fit yourbody best?
Do you have already like abathing suit that'll work for
you?
Imagine being like a 15 or16-year-old girl and you having
24 hours to get ready for atrip.

(32:56):
You're gonna be completelythrown off.
You don't know what works yet,but I think that some of that
even feels like a, that's whysometimes po postpartum feels so
adolescent.
Yes.
'cause you're in, it's the samething.
This new body and it's.
Very stressful.
And I don't think that it'ssomething that, again, I always
say, I wasn't prepared for this.

(33:17):
You really can't be until you'rein it.
Mm-hmm.
You know, And I'm sure that thisalso happens at other points,
and it doesn't alwaysnecessarily mean it has to be
like a postpartum experience,but everybody's bodies just
change.
And sometimes it happens veryquickly and sometimes it
doesn't.
And, but I'm sure that anybodycan relate to a moment where
your body just doesn't feel likeyours anymore.

(33:38):
It just feels very different.
And navigating that is verytricky too.
I'm sure it's gonna change againfor us.
I know like they say like withmenopause and perimenopause,
like the tire develops aroundyour midsection because of,
lower that you put weight ondifferent estrogen and you put
weight on in different way.
Mm-hmm.
You know?
And so how do you talk aboutyourself then in front of your

(34:01):
daughters?
Oh, mom's fat today.
I don't wanna say that to them.
I know the messaging is, youhave to just be very, very
careful with the messaging whenthere's like little ears
listening to you.
I know.
And even like the way we talkabout food like, I try to talk
about food'cause we always talk,go back to food.
But I always talk about foodbeing like an energy source.
And good food, good mood, andmake you strong.

(34:23):
It'll give you energy.
You're gonna be tired.
I try not to say this ishealthy, this is unhealthy.
Or if you have mac and cheese,you have to have something
healthy with it.
Because.
What does that even really mean?
I know, but I'm honestlysomebody who, and I've talked to
some of my girlfriends aboutthis too, and that's where some
of this spun from the kind ofwanting to talk about this a
little bit deeper.

(34:44):
I wanna have an expert on herethat can talk about specific
food related, like I guess thatrelationship to food and how we
should talk to our kids aboutthat.
I want an expert to come on andtalk about those things because
I know that we're growing intothis parenting in the age where
you should not villainizecertain things.

(35:05):
You should, You should treat allfoods equally.
That's the messaging that I keepseeing thrown out by like some
of the bigger parenting podcastsand some of the bigger parenting
groups, you know, that have.
Guides and this and that and ourexperts.
And I don't agree with that.
So it could just be, you know,you don't, I don't, I don't

(35:27):
because I don't think that allfood is equal.
It's not.
You're gonna tell me that it is.
I think that's a lie.
I think that you can haveanything in moderation.
Mm-hmm.
But I think that that needs tobe taught.
And I think that needs to bepracticed.
I think that saying all foodsare equal, I think is dangerous.
I don't think, because they'renot all equal.
Right.
We know that they're not.

(35:47):
And so I think that it's alwaysjust finding balance and things
being okay with balance,learning balance.
It's not usually like a skillthat you're just born with.
You know?
It's something that you have toput into practice.
So I just have to be okay with,that's how I'm going to raise my
children is not all food isequal.
It doesn't mean you can't havethose things, but it means that.

(36:10):
Some foods are probably gonnamake you feel better than other
foods.
Other foods might make you feelgreat in the moment, but might
not make you feel great longterm.
Right.
And some foods might just be notas fun to eat, but they're gonna
make you feel good and make yourbody feel good.
I think that's a message thatyou have to teach your kids,
right?
Or at least that that's themessage that I wanna teach my
kids.

(36:30):
If you teach them that all foodsare equal, why are they not
gonna want to have cake fordinner?
Then, and why wouldn't they wantthat the next day and the next
day?
I'm curious to have somebodywho's teaching that message,
give the whole backstory.
Mm-hmm.
And like the full story and thenhow that's relayed to like my
12-year-old who loves to eatSkittles, like he's gonna go

(36:51):
play tennis like, and you,that's gonna be the food that
you bring with you to tennis,right?
Like that's the snack,, that'ssnacks.
The powerful food that youshould be having before I know
it's a very delicate topic and Iknow you wanna be careful, but.
Again, I think it's somethingthat our generation were too
afraid to do things.
Maybe we wanna do things alwaysopposite of how we were brought

(37:15):
into it.
And learning about things.
But I don't always think thatopposite means better.
And this goes back to somethingthat you had said a couple of
weeks ago.
Yeah.
Which was, sometimes you wannado things, you, you wanna give
your kids what you did have too.
You know?
And it's not always just whatyou didn't, the opposite of what
you didn't have.
And.

(37:36):
We were talking about that inrelation to our gentle parenting
approach and how we struggleboth of that.
But that's I almost feel likethat also plays into this
conversation too, where justbecause some of the messaging
was probably a little bit morestrict with food when we were
growing up mm-hmm.
doesn't mean that it should be afree for all for our kids.
Right.

(37:56):
Because again, where's the datathat shows what that ends up
like?
Right.
So if you went to the beach withyour parents when you were a kid
what was in the cooler?
What did your mom pack in thecooler?
Probably sandwiches and fruitand chips and probably a mix of
things.
Definitely sandwiches.
What about you?
We always have this talk becausewe went on, like this past

(38:17):
vacation, we went on with mydad's brother and his wife.
Mm-hmm.
We've been traveling with themsince and they have two boys
since I was, a baby.
So my aunt would pack the bagwith the chips, the Pringles,
the, yeah, the snacky beachfood, all the snacky beach food.
Those like Mondo sugary drinks.
Okay.
Yep.
All of the fun food would be inher bag and then she would let
her kids get french fries andhot dogs or whatever.

(38:39):
And then in my mom's bag, it waslike grapes.
Yeah.
A peach, a yogurt, apples,pretzels, or the crunchy snack.
Yeah.
And then we had like water.
And I remember my mom sometimeswould get a seltzer.
Seltzer was like the treat.
A treat.
Yeah.
And I'm like, and again, I don'tknow if it was,'cause my aunt
had two boys and my mom had twogirls at the time.

(39:00):
Well I guess'cause Marissa camealong later.
But so when.
I got a little older and I hadmy own beach bag.
I was like, I'm gonna have thisfun beach bag.
You wanna do the opposite?
I'm gonna do, I am gonna havethe fun beach bag with the
Pringles and the this and thethat.
Let me tell you, it created likemy kids would, they don't do

(39:21):
well when they eat all of that.
So now if you go to my beachbag, I'm, I pack just the same
way my mom does.
Yeah.
And my kids are like, I hatewhat's in your beach bag.
You pack us like, we don't wantany of this food.
I'm like.
Tough shit.
Yeah.
Because when you eat the otherway, you melt down in two
seconds.
I know.
It's really tough.

(39:41):
We talk, we, our conversationsalways come back to this.
Like, It's definitely somethingthat we both struggle with in
terms of how to parent this way.
Yeah.
Around food.
But I guess it's, I guess it'sjust something where we're
gonna, it's, you're gonna haveto live and learn it.
Yeah.
Just like the same way I thinkeverybody does, but, and it's
probably something that noteverybody agrees on.
And I bet you people will havedifferent experiences of growing

(40:04):
up to relate to.
Right.
And so you're trying to takebits and pieces of maybe what
worked and maybe what you wishyou would've had.
And I think that when it comesto that, the word that just pops
up to me is balance.
It's just it doesn't all have tobe quote unquote healthy foods,
but I think you do have to Yeah.
Learn, you know, we know whathappens when you just eat like

(40:27):
crap for a handful of days.
You feel it.
And.
I don't think that's necessarilynegative information to share
and teach a child.
I just don't.
I don't.
I don't.
But see, my messaging hasabsolutely nothing to do with
looks.
Mine is, it's purely how you'refeeling on the feeling.
Yes.
It has nothing to do with if youeat the, because my oldest son

(40:49):
eats like crap.
He eats bags and bags ofSkittles and candy.
I joke all the time.
I'm like, you're gonna getdiabetes.
Yeah.
I don't even think you can getdiabetes that way.
I don't know why I say that tohim.
It's probably a horrible thingto say to your kid.
I'm like, you're gonna getdiabetes.
Stop eating Swedish fish forbreakfast.
Right.
And he's so skinny.
And then my middle son is alittle stockier.

(41:10):
He's a little full, but he eatsso healthy.
He eats very balanced.
He just eats a lot of food.
So I just have to.
Let him eat this food.
Yes.
Because he's doing all thethings I'm telling him to do.
Right.
He's eating the eggs, he'seating the toast, he's doing all
the balanced eating, but yeah,the food is tricky.
Yeah, it's definitelyinteresting that you brought up
that it's not in relation tolooks, because I feel the same

(41:33):
way.
It obviously has benefits, youknow, like it ends up benefiting
your body to eat a certain way.
But mine, the way I have anxietyabout it, especially with my
kids, is because I know how Ifeel when I eat terribly.
It affects my entire system,mentally, physically,

(41:54):
emotionally, I feel it.
When I eat badly, I ju I reallydon't feel well.
I just don't.
So I know that's how my kidswill I know that when my kids
eat badly, it's coming.
I, you know, it's coming.
So it's triggering, again, Iwon't waver on that message.
It's just how I'm gonna be.
Sometimes when I eat too muchfor too long, I come home and

(42:16):
I'm like, oh my God, I'mbloated.
I'm only five two, so if I gainfive pounds or lose five pounds,
for me it's obvious.
I don't feel like that's thesame for everybody.
If you have like height on yourside.
Yeah.
But for me, I'm like, oh my God,I feel it.
So what I'm not supposed to tellmy girls that.
I have to keep that part tomyself.
I know it's tricky, but thenthey would hear that and then

(42:36):
maybe they're too young toprocess.
They're way too young now.
Yeah.
They might not understand, Iguess, the relation of how you
got there, so maybe they justthink, oh, she said she ate a
lot.
I'm just playing with thatstatement.
But they, I think that's thepart that gets hard is that kids
don't really understand the fullscope of things.
So they might not be able tounderstand this equals that.

(42:58):
They might just see like veryblanket statements of okay, food
makes her bloated, or food makesher feel this way.
So then what do I do about that?
And that's I think that's whereit gets really hard.
Yeah.
That's when you have to startbeing honest with yourself.
Children are very humblingbecause you have to look deep
down and all this stuff that yousay to yourself, if you say out

(43:21):
loud, they're gonna question youon it.
Right.
And then you're like, oh, well Ididn't really mean that.
I didn't eat too much.
I just ate more than I usuallydo because I'm on vacation.
And that's okay to do and that'sokay to do.
Right.
But then when we come back home,when you come back, you may not
feel great for a day or two.
Right.
You know, You have to likeReregulate case in point today.
That's why you're feeling likethis now.
'cause you, because I overparticipated this week's you

(43:43):
called.
I love it.
I know.
But you have to, yeah.
I'm okay with it.
Yeah.
But I also have to accept that.
So did my kids.
And that was probably why mydaughter was having a raging
lunatic this week.
Let's get back to being honest.
What have you done that you'recomfortable sharing?
Have you, what do you like to doto make yourself feel your

(44:04):
physical best that maybe hasemotional and mental benefits
to, okay.
Oh, I love this.
I love this.
If you're willing to share thetea, I'll share it all.
Share the teat.
I'll share it all.
All right.
We'll start from head to toe.
So I color my hair.
Mm-hmm.
Which, and I like straighten myhair.
I do the Brazilians'cause I havelike curly Yeah, you do the
Brazil crazy curly hair.
Yep.

(44:25):
I.
Pencil in my eyebrows every day.
Mm-hmm.
Because I have like thineyebrows.
I do laser hair removal.
Mm-hmm.
Because I have a mustache andone eyebrow and all the things.
So I do laser hair removal, butI do Botox.
Mm-hmm.
I've done, I've done filler, butI only did it one time.
It didn't look right on me.

(44:46):
I don't even know why I did it.
It was like a, yeah, that was awhile ago.
Bad.
It was a while ago.
What else have I done?
I've done like the peels and theskin stuff.
Some lasers.
Some lasers.
Mm-hmm.
But I don't though I'm not agreat laser person.
I feel like for me, just likegood skincare is probably best,
but I do a ton of skincarestuff.
I get my nails done.

(45:06):
I work out every day.
Yeah.
Whether I walk or I liftweights.
I try to eat healthy.
It's not like I just do nothing.
Right.
You know?
Yeah.
There's upkeep.
I have some upkeep.
Yeah.
I have some upkeep and I thinkthat's okay.
But you don't get, you don'tever gatekeep anything.
No, because I'd be lying.
Yep.

(45:26):
And also, I don't expect to goto book club and sit with my
friends who are the same age asme and show up.
The only one that doesn't have agray hair and not a wrinkle.
How is that authentic?
Yeah.
No, it's not like that's a lie.
Right.
Is there anything that you havebeen wanting to do?
Or is there anything that'sfloated around in your mind ever
of I wish I could do somethingabout this?

(45:48):
I wanted to get a nose job.
Mm.
Because I hate my nose.
I think it's so big.
And if you hear me on thispodcast, I sniffle constantly.
'cause I have a deviated septumand it's like hard for me to
breathe out of one side.
So I wanted it to want it, tofix it.
But my I still can't.
I'm 30, almost 39 years old.
Yeah.
And I still listen to myparents, but my husband says the

(46:08):
same thing like, right.
that is your face.
Don't change it.
Please don't change it.
So that's the only thing I'veever kind of wanted to do.
That's what, that's somethingthat you've floated.
Like I, you wish you couldchange, but you won't.
No, I won't.
Okay.
I'm gonna leave it all whilealone.
Yeah.
And I've always wanted to get myboobs done too, but I'm gonna
leave those alone too.
Yeah.
Yeah.
I just feel like they're there.

(46:30):
It's fine.
Who's even looking at themanymore?
Yeah.
Who cares?
There's one person that looks atthem.
Yeah.
And he could care less.
Yeah.
So I don't know.
And also like then I start toget the health anxiety and I'm
like, oh my God.
My mom had breast cancer.
I'm gonna get these implants andthen what if I have them right?
And this and that, so I'm justgonna leave well enough alone.
I love it.
So that's what I've done.

(46:51):
And I would share, and I alsowould share all of those things
with my daughters.
I'm like comfortable enough toshare them.
Yeah.
They're not in hiding with her.
I'm not in hiding.
I think when you start to hidethings,, you have to ask
yourself, why are you hiding it?
Why are you embarrassed?
Are you ashamed of that part ofyou?
Is that why you're trying tochange it?
Or are you just okay with it andyou're gonna Right.

(47:11):
So, right.
What about you??
So I'm kind of all of the samethings.
Yeah.
I have hair extensions.
I've had hair extensions for along time.
I have relatively thin hair,like just fine hair.
So I love my extensions.
They don't really give me lengthright now.
It's just some extra volume.
Mm-hmm.
And I obviously share thatbecause I share who I go to,

(47:31):
which is Sam from at Paint LoveBlend, who I love.
We both go to her.
She actually, she's the best.
So I love my hair extensions.
They, they actually aresomething that I feel like ends
up helping me out a little bitmore than like upkeep.
Mm-hmm.
And it, they allow me to kind ofwash my hair a little bit less
and to kind of keep the stylefor longer.

(47:52):
Mm-hmm.
So it's actually like highmaintenance that gives me, like
loan maintenance.
Mm-hmm.
You know.
And I do get Botox.
I have not gotten Botox for along time.
I haven't gotten it sinceJanuary I think.
So it is completely worn off.
I have full movement of my faceright now.
But does it wear off quickly foryou?
It does.
It does.
I like must metabolize it veryfast, so I usually, I'm not

(48:13):
frozen for very, very long.
I feel like I always havemovement to my face.
Do you like that look?
Do you like to be frozen or doyou like No, I don't like to be
frozen.
Frozen.
But I do like when the wrinkles,especially on my forehead, are
minimal because I just feel likeeven for makeup it just,
everything lays much nicely thatwhen those are not there doesn't
get stuck in a crease, so I lovethat.

(48:34):
I have tried the lip flip, whichis with Botox too.
Oh I talked about that lastweek.
Yes.
Which I liked, but it's too highmaintenance to continue doing
it.
Agree.
'cause we talked about how it'sreally hard to drink out of a
straw and you look and feel whyAbsolutely absurd.
You're like, why did I do?
Does the effect outweigh likethe lifestyle change?
And in that case, no.
So like I didn't, yeah, there'ssome things where you're like, I

(48:56):
can get on board with themaintenance for that because you
like the results so much.
And in that case I did not.
So I only did that once and Ihave not done filler.
Have you done any lasers orpeels or anything?
I've done PRP before.
Oh wait, I did.
That's been a long time.
Wait, I did that too.
Yeah.
I have a funny story that thevampire facial, I have a funny

(49:16):
story about the PRP.
Go ahead, finish and I'll tellyou my story.
No, that's I, that was likesomething again, this was before
I had kids and I feel like my,like queasiness has gotten so
much better since having kids,but like before that, oh, yours
has gotten better.
Yeah, I was like, such a baby.
If I had to get blood drawn, Iwould pass out in the chair and
like I went through like someinfertility and where you're

(49:37):
just getting poked and proddedall the time.
And so my like needle feardefinitely subsided.
Having to do all that and justlike giving birth and having to
get IVs and all that, likeyou're, in a c-section and all
that, it's just like you'reokay, I like, things aren't so
bad.
Like a little poke doesn'treally freak me out anymore.
But yeah the PRP is the vampirefacial where they take.

(49:58):
Your blood and they spin it downto plasma and then they
microneedle you with that.
And so I did have really greatresults from that.
That was great.
But that was a really long timeago.
That was pre-kids, but my facelooked great.
But that was, I was probably inmy mid thirties when Okay.
I did that and I think that'sget my nails done.
But it's dip over my real nailsright now.

(50:19):
You were gonna tell your funnystory about, wait, I'll tell you
my funny story about my PRP.
So I didn't do the vampirefacial.
So instead of getting likefiller in my under eye,'cause I
have like under eye hollowing,they take your blood, they spin
it.
And then they reinject it underyour eyes.
And what it does is it like.
Supposed to stimulate some typeof collagen.
Collagen.
Collagen.
And it works.
It does.
It actually works.

(50:40):
My hollowness was gone forprobably about three and a half
years.
And that's probably like reallygood.
That's like good instead offiller.
'cause it probably doesn'tmigrate either.
It gave the effect of fillerbecause I, it got rid of all of
the hollowness, but there was nofiller.
It's your body too.
It's your own body's blood.
So they took my blood.
I went to New York City with mygirlfriends.
One of my friends goes to thisplace, it's next to her office.

(51:01):
So we went in this littlecurtain room.
And it was also during COVID, sowe had like masks on.
It was hot.
And so I, as get overheated.
Yeah, you do.
And I was hungry and I had lowblood sugar, like I'm a
disaster.
All the things.
So recipe for you.
Recipe for a disaster.
So I'm sitting next to mygirlfriend, Alana, in this tiny
little room and they take myblood.

(51:23):
I start to get a little hot.
I'm like, I feel a little hot.
And they're like, yeah, it'snormal.
So then what they do is theyspin it and then they put a
cannula in, and then they injectit through a cannula.
The sound of the cannula on mybone was like, yeah, I would've
painted guys.
I'm gonna blah.

(51:43):
Yeah.
I threw Upop and then I passedout.
So I wake up.
It was only for yeah.
Two seconds.
Yeah.
But I wake up and I look in themirror and I'm like gray and
sweaty.
And I was like you have to dothe other eye.
You can't just leave me.
You have one eye with one eye.
How were you with the other eye?
I was like, just please go fast.

(52:03):
Yeah.
So they did it fast.
I drank I don't even know what Idrank, like an orange juice or
something.
Ugh.
Oh, the p pain is beauty.
But it made for a funny story.
Wow.
I know.
I fainted many a times.
Like when doing, I feel like Ifaint.
I fainted one time doing Botoxthe first time.
No way.
Just not fainted, but just gotreally queasy.
Like that kind of blackoutfeeling where you're like, okay,

(52:25):
the fuzzy ears.
Like where you start to be like,yeah, it's coming.
Oh my gosh.
That had never happened to mebefore.
And I fainted.
For sure.
Like Fainted.
Fainted.
When we did the PRP,'cause theyhad to take the blood and I
definitely passed out and butsee now our daughters are gonna
come to us and be like, mommy,we wanna do this.
And we're gonna be like, youidiot, you're gonna pass out,

(52:46):
you're gonna throw up.
I know.
No, I know.
Worth it.
I don't know, even though we didit.
Yeah, I know.
Alright.
So what is it that you wanna trythen?
I've been really wanting to getmy eyebrows.
I've never done microblading andI don't know if I wanna do
microblading.
I think microblading ha I thinkmicroblading has come a long way
since the beginning.
Like I feel like it looks somuch more natural than it used

(53:07):
to.
So I've been wanting to do that,but I also might just try a
shape and tint.
That's, and maybe a laminationwhere it's like they set them
where they're fluffy and brushedup and then it stays that way.
So I might try that first beforeI do any sort of like permanent.
Sarah does that at MNAs.
Yeah, I know she does.
Oh.
Yep.
So there you go.
Are you gonna try there?
I know I've been, yeah, I'vebeen playing around with doing

(53:28):
that.
Okay.
And just to'cause I think whenmy brows are.
Lifted my brows I don't havebrows that like naturally go up
or stay up.
And I think all it takes is justlike brushing them up in a
certain way and your eyes justlike immediately open and you
just look so much less tired.
And my face looks moresymmetrical that way.

(53:50):
And so I, that's been somethingthat I've been like, oh, I wanna
do something like that.
Like I feel like brows just havesuch an impact on your face and
it's an easy like lowmaintenance, low hurting type of
thing that to do, they do have abig effect.
Yes, for sure.
So that's something on my mind Iwanna do something like that.
For sure.
And then the other thing that Idid do, and this was after baby

(54:12):
number two, was I did sculp.
Oh yes.
And that was, I did that too.
Yeah, that, there you go.
Okay.
So we'll add those.
You're like prompting me.
I keep, yeah.
So that was great.
I did that after baby numbertwo.
That was less for looks and morefor, I wanted my core strength
back because something happenedafter baby number two.

(54:34):
It did not happen after babynumber one, which is shocking
because I had a C-section forLeo who was my first, and then I
had a.
Vaginal delivery the second timearound.
And I felt like I lost my corethe second time around and not
the first, which very, huh.
Which really shocked me.
'cause I would've thought theC-section would've really put me

(54:55):
over the edge in terms of cutthem half losing my core.
But I, with my second, I just, Ifelt like I had absolutely no
core strength left and it wasaffecting my.
Back.
Like I felt like I could not, Ihad no strength.
Like it was more for help metighten this back up so I can at
least hold my baby without likewincing and pain.

(55:17):
And so that, it did help.
I did four sessions of that.
Did you do the one that was likethe clamshell or did you do the
one that was front?
I did the one that was on thefront because it was mainly
about my abs.
And did you, which one did youdo?
I did both.
The one that was like theclamshell they say really helps
with the back too.
Oh, okay.
Because half of it goes on yourback and the other half goes on

(55:38):
your stomach.
Yeah.
Because your core does wraparound.
So that probably would've beenbetter for me for that, but it
did work really well.
I did it well because I like tohave that look of abs.
Like when you like look shreddedand have abs.
But that doesn't really happento me all that often, just after
a stomach bug.
But I did it too because I hadthat abdominal diastasis.
Yes.
After I had the twins.
So did I.

(55:58):
And so that helped with that.
And it did help with that.
Definitely.
It did help with that.
Yeah.
So I feel I think I had itafter, it was probably like
starting with baby number oneand then really with baby number
two.
It was just I that I felt thesame exact way.
So it did really help with thatand I loved it.
Where did you go for that?
I went to Ignite Med Spa.
Oh, okay.
And I got it done there.
Yeah, it was great.
Is that in West Hartford?

(56:18):
Great.
Yes, in West Hartford,Connecticut.
Okay.
I loved that.
Yeah.
Highly recommend that.
It's definitely worth it.
Yeah.
Yeah.
It's not cheap.
No.
It's and I think you have to doat least four.
You have to do a handful ofsessions.
Sessions, yeah.
To get the results.
But that was really great.
So these are all tweaks that wedo to ourselves.
Every day.
We don't wake up looking likethis.
Absolutely not.

(56:38):
And that's why even.
For me, having a very short,non-negotiable skincare routine
in the morning.
I come out looking like acompletely different person than
when I go into the bathroomfirst thing in the morning, like
just the few products that I puton my face, brush up the brows,
put a quick lip on like myserums, like I just, it, it

(57:01):
instantly changes how I look andfeel.
So like I have to, so you'redoing, so I have it more for you
than for others?
For sure, because I feelimmediately, like I just feel
like a new, fresh person I needthose few they're like small but
mighty, do you think there's adifference between looking good
and feeling good?
I think they're connected forsure.
So last year I had a.

(57:23):
Huge dramatic weight loss afterbaby number two.
It was very unintentional.
It was due to so much stress.
That's what happens to my bodywhen when I'm stressed, I, your
body burns off.
Yes.
Everything my body.
And last year it was thecombination of just not eating,
not sleeping, not taking care ofmy body, being under tremendous

(57:46):
stress, being so sleep deprived.
And I just had, I lost so muchweight.
Like it's something I haven'treally talked about publicly
before, but it was completelyunintentional.
And so in some aspects you wouldthink that I lost the baby
weight.
I'm saying that in likequotations, right?
Somebody might say to you, good,somebody might say, good.

(58:08):
Wow, you lost the baby weightreally fast.
And I did, I lost the babyweight.
Weight, that, and probablyanother 15 pounds.
It was insane.
I like may have looked okay,like just because the weight was
off, but the weight off did notequate to me feeling good or
strong.

(58:28):
And it was not a good thing.
It was not a good thing.
I also didn't do it in a healthyway.
It was just right.
I feel like when you do thingsslowly, it, everything looks
good, you look healthy.
Mine was simply that I justwasn't taking care of my body,
right?
With my son, which was my firstpregnancy, I never went back

(58:51):
down to my pre-baby weight.
But I looked and felt good.
I felt very strong.
I.
Really, I think that if I lookback at like when I was happiest
with my body, it was after thatbecause I may have looked
completely different than I didPreki.
But you felt good.
But I felt so strong and I wasso proud of what my body had

(59:14):
done and what I had gonethrough.
And so that's like a verypositive, like memory for me.
Yeah.
Is like looking back and feelinglike I felt so good at that
point.
I didn't look like I used to,but I was okay with it and I was
just very proud of myself.
And then after this year Ireally had to focus on, and

(59:36):
that's sometimes when I talkabout, and I reference like
being physically healthy.
That's what I have to talk aboutis just getting my body back to
a really good point.
And eating well, taking care ofmyself, putting my body and my
mind first.
I think when you feel good, itends up on the outside, and I
think sometimes when you lookgood, it doesn't always mean

(01:00:00):
that you're on the inside.
You're good.
So I think that usually whenyou're feeling good, it's
outwardly portrayed somehow,interesting.
It's interesting though aboutthat weight loss because
oftentimes if somebody losesweight, the just like the thing
to say is oh wow, you look good.
You look like you lost someweight.
You look great.
Yep.
But you would never say that tosomebody if they put few pounds

(01:00:22):
on, you would never say, oh, yougained 10 pounds, you look
great.
But I will say in some of, evenlike our group of friends and
some of the people I knowmyself, you at times when I've
been thinner is when I haven'tbeen so good.
Yes.
Mentally, yes.
And other times when I'm like alittle on the heavier side, and
again, I'm using heavier foryour body, for just for my body,

(01:00:43):
for your body.
It's actually when I'm feelingbest.
Yes.
'cause maybe I'm not asstressed.
I'm sleeping better.
Yes.
I'm exercising.
When I exercise, you're balance.
And I lift weights.
I'm usually a little heavier.
Like all the good things.
Yes.
I, it probably means you'reenjoying yourself too.
Sure.
Yeah, I think that's exactlyhow, that's how my body works
too, right?
Like when I am at my thinnest,it doesn't usually mean I'm at

(01:01:06):
my best.
So I just think, and again, Iunderstand some people, it might
be the opposite, right?
It might be the opposite.
But I just also, that messaging,I think you have to be careful
with too.
Oh, you lost weight, you lookgood.
Or you gained weight, and youdon't say anything.
Like, how about you lost weight?
Hey, is everything okay?
Yeah.
Everything all we're like, wealways say we grew up in that

(01:01:26):
skinny culture, right?
Where it's, but it was likeskinny raised, but it was like
skinny fat in a way.
Bagels were like, oh, no fat ina bagel.
Okay.
We know now that's absolutelyridiculous and you're not going
to eat a bagel like 10 bagels aday and then not eat any, fat
and be healthy.
I think things have changed too,in a good way.
They have.
Oh, for sure.
The messaging I think now is somuch better and, but I just

(01:01:51):
think that it's tough becausewe're always wrangling what we
grew up around, and that doesn'teven necessarily mean like what
our parents said to us or did tous.
No.
What was just out there.
It just means like the messagingfrom a culture standpoint has
changed so much from what itused to be when we were growing
up, and now we're grappling withwhat do we then do?

(01:02:14):
Yeah.
As part of the culture for ourkids growing up, and what we do.
Tricky for ourselves.
It's a tricky conversation.
It is.
It is curious to hear from ourlisteners if any of this is a
trigger for them or I know.
Or if we hit or miss the mark onanything.
Okay, so we'll close with ourpink spotlight, which of course
is our little tip, somethingthat we're loving that's making

(01:02:37):
the week or just life just alittle bit better.
And do you wanna share yours?
Sure.
So mine was actually inspired byyour husband, Raja.
Oh.
And when you guys were here afew weeks ago raja said, do you
guys, do you give your kids anallowance?
Oh.
And I like snapped at him and Iwas like, Raja, look at this
house.
Look at how my children aregrowing up.
They have everything that theywant.

(01:02:58):
You think that I can incentivizethem to do anything?
And he was like, no, I think youcould, I think with a little bit
of money you could incentivizethem to do some of these chores.
'Cause your husband grew up in abig family where they all had to
pull Yep.
Very similar.
Pull their weight.
Lots of kids.
Was he was speaking more fromlike the 10-year-old Raj, not
from like the 40-year-old Raj.
So actually my daughter Ava gottargeted on this app that she's

(01:03:20):
playing for the green lightcard.
Have you heard of the greenlight card?
No.
So I'm late to the game'cause abunch of my friends have been
using this for their kids foryears.
But what you do is you orderthese, basically, like these
credit cards for your kids.
You link them to your bankaccount and there's an app.
So every kid has their owncredit card and they got to
design the outside of it.
Like one put a dog on it, oneput a fish, whatever.

(01:03:43):
And those credit cards, I thinkit's a MasterCard can be used
anywhere at Target, like out inthe open, it's their own card.
Oh.
And how what you do is there'san app.
So I have the app on my phoneand then they have the apps on
their tablets and so they cancheck off and see what chores
they have to do for that day.
Oh, cool.
So I can add a chore for them.

(01:04:04):
I can add them okay.
You, I can also add like anincentive, like sleep in your
bed every night this week,that's 50 cents every time you
sleep in your bed or however Iwanna play it.
Or, okay.
Mom's not home.
I'm adding chores for everybody.
Like empty the trash.
Wipe down whatever chores mykids are responsible with.
And then they get money fortheir chores and I, from my bank

(01:04:26):
account, transfer it to theirgreen light card.
Oh, okay.
And then that way they can havetheir own money to spend.
Oh wow.
I like that.
It's, I like that it's tiedtogether.
So like it actually.
Holds it accountable.
Like it holds them accountablefor the chores.
Yeah.
They can see And that's how theyget it.
Yeah.
So then if they wanna go toTarget, so you go in and say
yes, this was done.
And then they get the amount setfor that thing.

(01:04:48):
Yeah.
Oh, that's really cool.
They can check it off.
Yep.
And then I add the money.
Oh, I love that.
So it's, okay.
So this is for allowance.
This is, it's an allowance.
This is really cool.
Yeah.
It's an allowance.
And you, there's just ways thatlike, everything gets digitized
now and it's, yeah, it's likeyou can't really give your kids
cash anymore.
'cause they can't really do muchwith it.
It's interesting.
My oldest didn't want the greenlight card.
He wanted the cash.

(01:05:09):
'cause he likes to save moneylike in a box and squirrel it
away.
Where my other kids are morelike digital probably.
Yeah.
They wanna go to Target.
They wanna buy stuff.
He right now is like saving upfor a pc, but whatever.
That's him.
But I like this card idea.
That's a really good idea.
I love that.
So we'll see how it, we'll seehow it goes.
Yeah.
You'll have to update us.
They're always asking forthings.

(01:05:29):
And it's hard not to buy yourkids stuff when you're like out
at Target getting toiletries andthey're like, oh, this, that,
and I'm happy to get them stuff,but sometimes I'm like, no.
You need to use your own money.
And they're like, we don't haveany money.
So now, yeah, you're gonna haveto update us and I'll have to
tell Raja as Yes.
That's really cool.
Tell Ra.
I love that.
That's great.

(01:05:50):
Yeah.
So the green light cards, that'sa really good tip.
I love it.
Okay, so mine is a product kindof on the line of what we've
been talking about.
Just like something I've been alittle bit insecure with is,
it's called the Sculpt by YouBeauty.
It's supposed to help.
Tighten and firm your skin, andso it says that it's called the

(01:06:13):
sculpt arm compound.
So that's actually what I boughtit for because in pregnancy I
gained a lot of weight in myarms and I felt like on the
backs of my arms that there wasjust some texture there that
just looked from probably likeboth times of the weight loss,
the weight gain, and then theweight loss.
There's just some kind of likevery faint.
Is it like that creepiness?
Yeah, it's a little creepy andit's a little, almost like some

(01:06:36):
stretch marks oh, so I got.
Specifically for that, and I wasusing that.
That was like where the firstbottle went.
And then I actually went onlineand read about it because I was
like, oh, this is great.
And it had really great reviews.
And so when I got my secondbottle, it was like, oh, it's
for your arms, your belly I waslike, oh, it's like obviously
you can use it in other placesbesides your arms.

(01:06:57):
So I started using it a coupleof months ago on my stomach for
the same reasons, just to firmup that skin.
That was from the weight lossand weight gain, and I really
like it.
I love the ingredients in thisand it's.
I just think that this line,this specifically for body, I
have a really great likeskincare face routine.
But not a body line, but I'veneglected my body and so I

(01:07:21):
really like this line.
They have a lot of reallyamazing body products, arm
compounds and it's arm compound,but it can be used for anything.
And it's like a nice thick creamwhen you put it on there is
almost like a little bit of a,it smells good.
There's a little bit of a,something like a Z with it,
right?
Like it's not, I wouldn't sayit's like a zing, but it's
something along those lines.
I feel like it's like justhelping to tighten it up, but I

(01:07:43):
really like it and it's notgreasy.
I like the ingredients in it andit's been great.
So they did give me a discountcode.
It's Christina withA-C-H-C-H-R-I-S-T-I-N-A for 20%
off anything.
Oh wow.
On the site.
And so I'll leave the link tothe exact product, but you can
use that discount code atanything you beauty.

(01:08:03):
Oh, okay.
This is great.
Yes.
This has been really great foranywhere that you wanna like
lift and tighten.
It says arms, neck, and chest.
But I used it on my stomach andit has anywhere where that
creepiness can start.
Yes.
And I really should be puttingit on my chest too.
'cause I feel like with sleepingand stuff, that creepiness
starts there.
So that's actually didn'trealize you could put it on your

(01:08:23):
neck.
Yeah.
And your chest.
So I'm gonna try that too.
But I love this too.
I love, I really like the wholeline.
I like it.
I like it.
All righty, girl.
Oh, thanks for bearing with metoday.
I know all of you.
Thank you guys so much.
And just a reminder about thelittle gift giveaway that we're
doing.
If you leave us a written reviewon Apple we will send you a

(01:08:45):
beautiful little pink flamingobracelet.
Yeah.
And I'm wearing mine now.
I just mailed the out this nowmorning before.
Thank you to anybody who left areview.
We really appreciate it and arejust happy to send you any sort
of token of appreciation.
It helps other women find us.
Yes.
Which is so exciting.
Our Pippa community is growing.
Yes.
Which is exciting.
So thank you guys.
We'll see you next week.
Have a great week.

(01:09:05):
Have a good weekend.
Bye bye.