March 3, 2025 • 59 mins
Elise Morgan is a former personal trainer and IFBB Professional Fitness Athlete, turned dynamic life coach, author, speaker, podcast host, and healer with a bold and sassy yet compassionate approach to personal empowerment. With a master's degree from the school of hard knocks and certifications in life coaching, NLP, and sacred ceremonies, Elise is dedicated to helping women break free from limiting beliefs and unlock their true potential.
Through mindset coaching, spiritual growth, and personal transformation, Elise leads you on a journey to awaken your soul, embrace your authentic self, and navigate life's challenges with confidence.
Whether through life coaching, transformational workshops, inspiring podcasts, or soul-awakening retreats, Elise provides the tools and insights you need to level up and create a life you love.
*If you were from the future and coming to help humanity what message would you leave them with in less than 3 sentences?
That you are more powerful than you think or are being taught all the answers you seek are within you.
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Transcript
Episode Transcript
Available transcripts are automatically generated. Complete accuracy is not guaranteed.
Speaker 1 (00:01):
Hi Elise, welcome to Quantum Alchemist Mastered
Podcast.
It's a pleasure to have youhere.
I'm excited to hear a littlebit about you, your hero's
journey, how you got to whereyou are today, and please share
from your heart whatever comesup, whatever you want to share
about yourself.
Speaker 2 (00:18):
Well, I am so grateful to be here with you and
I am so grateful that you arehaving this podcast for everyone
to learn about themselves andwho they are as humans.
And about me.
Well, I think I've got herefrom the School of Hard Knocks a
very long education in theSchool of Hard Knocks, so we can
(00:41):
get more into that if you'dlike.
But basically, life thatbrought you to a awakening of
your mind and and take yourresponsibility for yourself and
your actions and who you are andbe as a person.
Speaker 1 (00:55):
So I, as you know, cause we, we met slightly before
, uh, just a couple of daysprior to this, to to talk a
little bit about the dynamicsand stuff, and I told you I have
no clue where this is going togo, and sure thing.
So now I feel called to talkabout your childhood.
What was that like?
Speaker 2 (01:17):
You know it's funny.
I was just thinking about thisthe other day.
So thank you for bringing it up, because I've been, I just
started to do more inner childwork and brought back a.
It brought back a lot ofemotions.
So I had a great childhood inthe aspect of we were an upper
middle class family.
You didn't want from anything.
(01:37):
My father was a very funny guy.
It was always fun to be aroundand I was daddy's little girl.
I had two older brothers and Ihad a younger sister and we
could speak about her.
She had committed suicide, butgrowing up as children we were
all together, obviously.
So I was very close in age withmy sister and tight with her.
Two older brothers, much olderones, 11 years older, one six
years older and just, I have alot of good memories because
(02:01):
they're of being fun, you know,and that kind of stuff.
But now, as an adult, lookingback, I realized I wasn't really
ever seen or heard and you feellike invisible and unimportant
and none of those words come outof your parents mouths.
But that is the unspoken wordand I also I don't really
(02:26):
remember the age I can't sayspecifically I had gotten very
overweight.
So not only, and I justactually said this to my husband
the other day.
We were speaking about thechild stuff and I was like you
know, I never really got madefun of from friends or anything
like that, but my family wouldmake fun of me.
So my childhood was like thisyou know, you're not really
(02:52):
accepted for what you are.
You're no one's even asking youyour opinion.
You're just, you know, justseen and not heard.
Not seen, not heard seen andnot heard.
Speaker 1 (03:06):
not seen, not heard.
Thank you for bringing this up,because when we're dealing with
specifically the subconsciousmind, which runs a lot of our
programming, and if you're not,if you haven't done a lot of the
work, you know it's hard tobring it into our awareness that
that's even happening to us andwe don't necessarily have to go
(03:27):
through big traumas.
You know, like abuse orsomething like that, it could be
things like this, and I'm notsaying you haven't, I haven't
touched on that with you.
I'm just saying in general, youknow, we don't necessarily have
to go through a big trauma tohave things.
We all have things that that weneed to work on and and things
(03:50):
that happened to us that, um,we're just learning and looking
back in retrospect and and kindof putting those parts back
together, um, kind of puttingthose pieces, those parts of us
that maybe wouldn't know how tocope.
As you know a lot of the innerchild work and stuff like that,
know a lot of the inner childwork and stuff like that.
I would like to, if you can,speak about, about your sister.
How old were you when thathappened?
(04:11):
19.
19.
That must've been.
I cannot even, I have not gonethrough that.
I cannot imagine what yourreality must've been completely
shattered, your heart, your soul.
If you guys were, were close, Iimagine it's like missing half
(04:31):
of your soul, like somebody soclose, kind of how did you cope?
Speaker 2 (04:35):
with that.
Like what?
How did that go?
You know, she had, in myopinion now as an adult and
knowing where I know, know aboutthis whole world.
I think a lot of it was broughton by the medications that she
was given.
She had like depression issuesand stuff, and I think I believe
the suicide in and of itselfwas caused by the medications.
(04:57):
This has gone back many, manyyears ago and they didn't know
half of what they know now andeven now they don't really know
much.
So how did I cope?
First of all, it was and I andI don't, and you know if she was
here right now she wouldunderstand how.
Why I'm saying this it was alittle bit of a relief, and not
that you know you don't wantyour sister in your life, but
because of you know where shewas in her life and the in and
(05:19):
out of mental institutions,whether she should have been
there or not, and there's thechaos of the family quote
unquote caused by her.
So it was almost like a.
It was like a relief becauseand I've spoken to other people
about this so it's like youalmost feel guilty because
you're relieved because of allthe problems and everything.
But in the other aspect of howdo you cope as this.
(05:41):
You know your um, it, it's,it's, it's so different.
I'm trying to think back howspecifically because I've always
been kind of into a higherconsciousness without knowing I
was um, I did not have a verysupportive boyfriend at the time
, so I was like thinking I, Ibrought this up to myself the
(06:03):
other day.
This is why I'm so I can try toget the words out to say what I
want to say.
I wasn't supported to what.
Like how are you doing Elise?
I was never asked like how areyou doing Elise?
It was more like you know,everyone kind of just went about
their life.
You know, we all as a familywere mourning, but no one ever
(06:23):
really asked me how I was doing,and I've always been the
caretaker for other people.
Like, how are you doing?
So I don't think I.
I even took the time out to saylike how am I doing?
You know, of course you'remourning, you're crying, and I
just think I don't want to sayignored it.
But I just like moved onquicker than I think I probably
(06:48):
should have.
And then, as I got a littleolder, then I started to go
through some work, like writingher letters and saying I miss
her and some of the things, andjust, you know, I think people
push it under the rug.
At least that's what my familyseemed to have done.
And you know my coping was.
You know I was young, you know,and like you know, you just
(07:11):
continue with your life.
You know everyone's going out,you know going dancing every
weekend and like you know, youcry, you have your time, you
have your funeral and then youkind of like go back to life and
I don't think I gave myself achance to mourn fully for her at
the time.
Speaker 1 (07:27):
Thank you for sharing that you still have both of
your parents alive.
Speaker 2 (07:34):
No, my dad died very, he was very young, that was.
You know.
You said this before.
The word trauma, and I thinkfor me the word trauma I don't
like to use it, I think peopleuse it way too much, but that
was very a, I think, for me.
The word trauma I don't like touse it, I think people use it
way too much, but that was verya big thing for me.
I was very close with my dad.
He died when he was 55 and mymom is alive now.
She's in her mid eighties, butto me my mom died a long time
(07:57):
ago because she's just, she'sjust existing.
So but to answer your question,the long, the long, short of it
is the short, long of it.
Whichever way you want to saythat my mom is still alive, yes,
Okay.
Speaker 1 (08:09):
So a lot of the reasons why I asked all of these
things is because, from my ownpersonal experiences, my
challenges, I like to see themas challenges, not traumas.
(08:40):
To me they're all initiations tothe soul for the spirit to just
expand, continue expanding.
But what I want to get to andhow I want to shift this
conversation is I know that nowa lot of the work that you do is
helping other people overcomeall of these obstacles.
(09:01):
But what I like, before we getinto what you do, is to talk
about some of the pain points,because we are in this position
having gone through the fire,having gone through the darkness
, having walked on the fireourselves.
We know what it feels.
We know what it feels like whenyou're in darkness, when you
(09:22):
can't see a way out, and a lotof the tools I'm sure that you
share in your coaching and inyour services is what has served
you, the tools that allowed youto get through this.
So that's why I get so personal, because we don't do this just
(09:44):
as a sales pitch or as no.
We we lived it and we areliving it, just in different,
you know, from different aspectsand and different scenarios now
in our lives.
Have you ever been throughdivorce?
Speaker 2 (10:00):
Yes.
Speaker 1 (10:01):
Okay, that's another big thing.
A lot of our clients have beenthrough divorce, have been
through loss, have been throughdepression, mental health.
If we keep avoiding theseconversations, if we keep
pushing it under the rug howwe've done it for so long just
to be able to survive and thrivein life and you know, whatever
(10:24):
pay your mortgage, your, your,your stuff, I get it, um, but
it's really I don't, I don'tbelieve it's serving us.
In this point, I think it isthe time to to sit with that, to
bring light to that, to reflect, to introspect, to question
everything about ourselves, likeour thoughts, if you have
(10:48):
suicidal thoughts, so why am Ihaving those?
What's the root cause of that?
Why is it coming up?
Menopause, we'll talk aboutthat too.
Basically, your curriculum islike you have all the check
boxes.
Speaker 2 (11:03):
Like I said, it's a school of hard knocks.
Like you have all the check,all the check boxes.
Like I said, it's a school ofhard knocks.
Well, I'm going to touch onthat because you know I'm a firm
believer and I have a feelingyou're going to agree with this
that and you can use the diamondin a rough, like diamonds
cannot become diamonds withoutall that high pressure.
And I don't think anyone.
You know, maybe you're bornelevated.
(11:24):
You know to the place, you know.
Maybe you're born elevated, youknow to the place, maybe you
are.
But chances are that you've gonethrough some deep shit, dark
places that you never thought,or maybe you thought you're
going to be there forever andthen you come out on the other
side and that is where you growand that's where you elevate and
that's where you become moreawake.
And you know, no one wants tofeel some of these things, but
(11:45):
the feeling of the shitty shitis what gets you to a higher
place.
And you know, when you're onthe other side, you know the
dark side.
You may not think that.
So we are lighthouses.
That's what I like to say.
We are lighthouses in people'sstorms because when you're going
in it and you don't see amentor if you will, or a coach
(12:05):
or someone, then you wouldn'tknow.
So how would you know thatthere's life on the other side?
There's, you know.
I call it the happily everafter, and you brought up
divorce and that's like myspecialty.
I'm not really happy about it,that that's my specialty, but
it's my specialty because that'swhat I overcame.
We spoke about the death of mydad and my sister, but one of
(12:27):
the biggest things that I'vegone through was my divorce from
my children's father.
I'm now remarried, but that wasone of the darkest times of my
life.
Speaker 1 (12:38):
Could you share anything about that time, if
it's okay?
Speaker 2 (12:42):
I will.
It's hard for me to share itand we've discussed this
privately, but I will touch onit.
For starters, I'm grateful forit all, truly, truly, truly
grateful for every part of it,and for me it was that and I did
not know at the time when I wasleaving that my ex-husband was
(13:06):
a narcissist, and if he hearsthis he will argue that fact.
But that is my opinion.
So, if you want me to be, thisis my opinion of what I've
learned.
And I thought that since wewere together I was with him
since I was 15 years old and Ithought that, since we were high
(13:26):
school sweethearts and you knowwe were together for a very,
very long time that we would be,it would be amicable and that
we would be friends and I was soexcited to be able to have that
healthy breakup.
If you will and it didn't gothat way, you know and if you
want to get into the whole thing, I'm sure your listeners would
(13:51):
love to hear about narcissism orthey might not even know
they're going through it, butthe whole thing happens when you
leave them or tell them theydon't want to be with them
anymore, and there's smearcampaigns, they lie, they go
behind your back and tell peoplethings that aren't true, to
make people side with them.
And the most hurtful thing forme, that it was done to my
children and it.
(14:12):
You know not to get intospecifics, but it was a very
horrible time for me because Idid not know what it was Now.
Now it's very prevalent to haveit's called parent alienation
and you know he'll, if he everheard this, I'm sure he would
fight me to the end that henever did that, but he did, and
that was my experience with him.
Might not be someone else's,but my experience with him was
(14:33):
that and I thought I was goingcrazy.
I didn't know what was going on.
Thankfully, now that I knowabout it, I always had my
children.
They weren't like gone, but Igot the scraps.
So that period of time for mewas dark because since he played
the victim so hardcore, myfamily kind of took his side.
(14:56):
So not only are you goingthrough this thing, not only are
you going through all theemotions of like your kids and
the whole thing.
Your family is not evensupporting you.
They weren't not.
They were not in my life, butlike.
They weren't supportive.
You know they.
They basically like I don'twant to use the term turn their
(15:16):
back on me, because that wasn'tthe case at one part.
Sometimes it was, but yeah, butthat's why it was very, very,
very hard for me and I'm stillunpacking a lot of that, because
I don't think I realized howmuch mental abuse went on.
I'm still unpacking a lot ofthat.
Speaker 1 (15:35):
Thank you for being vulnerable first.
I know it's a very privatematter and sharing it with us,
but believe me, your voice isthe voice of millions yes,
that's what's inspired me totell it, because I don't want to
interrupt you.
Speaker 2 (15:49):
But, rosalia, this has been one of my stories that
I've been holding in out of fear, and I'll, and I'm going to
tell the reader, the listeners,this because they might have the
same fear.
It's because I know what he'scapable of doing and you know,
and my and my kids are grown mennow, but they're still.
They stand by.
If it came push to shove, theymight get very defensive.
(16:10):
I'm not scared.
I'm going to lose.
I can't believe I'm going allout here.
But screw it.
This is what we're doing.
This is why we do what we do.
I don't mind telling the storyto anyone, but I do mind if,
like I, have a very, very bigfear of not losing my kids.
But just our relationship isgreat and I just don't want
(16:33):
anything to get in the way ofthat.
And it may here.
Speaker 1 (16:37):
I'll say this I'll say this so that you don't have
you don't feel because cause I,I know, uh, on a one-to-one you
will come all out with yourclients and with your friends
and you would just dive deepinto the real shit, pretty much,
um.
So here's what we do at the endwe're going to share how you're
(16:58):
helping everybody else, how youknow what you offer and stuff
like that.
There's so many people goingthrough divorce, both men and
women.
The bottom line of this isyou've been through it and it's
dragged on and it's been messy,which usually most of them are,
(17:19):
um, and you have a lot ofexperience with it.
So, if anybody really wants todive deep and personal because
we're mirrors of each other,we're students, both students
and teacher, even though you'rethe coach A lot of these things
help us identify with it andkind of see how you see it
differently or how youunderstand it differently, or
(17:39):
sometimes even recognize thingsthat you didn't know they were
like narcissistic traits, forexample.
So I will leave it, if anyone'sinterested, to dive deep into
this particular conversationabout divorce, about how to get
through it, how to transcend itand to transform that into your
purpose, and helping peoplethrough divorce has been part of
(18:07):
your purpose and continues tobe so, just for the sake of
keeping certain details that aremore private out.
Speaker 2 (18:18):
Oh, I basically went all out.
I didn't get it.
Speaker 1 (18:21):
Well, no, because I'm sure there's a lot of specifics
and a lot of things that a lotof people will identify with,
but I would much rather, um, youknow, if you offer, like a
discovery call or something likethat, or, or however you want
them to reach out, um, thatwould be a good, a good starting
point.
(18:41):
Start somewhere, ask for help.
If you're going through, if youfeel like you first of all, if
you're suicidal, please reachout for help, okay.
If you're going through mentalhealth, if you're going through
divorce, if you're in a darkplace, all of us as a humanity,
we're ascending in consciousnesstogether.
What that's going to entail?
(19:03):
A lot of chaos, perceived chaos,from our limited perception.
You know, our life is going tocrumble, probably 360 degrees,
you know, and your health, yourmarriage, your all of it,
because it's like the Phoenixrising right.
Something has to die forsomething new to be rebirth, and
(19:23):
you have a lot of experiencewith death and rebirth.
So I would just encouragesomebody we're going to put in
the description, however,they're going to be able to
reach you, um, and they canreally, really dive deep into
this, into this conversation.
Okay, Cause I don't want to putanything here that, yes, it may
be liberating for us and it mayhelp someone else, but it may
(19:44):
hurt somebody else as well, soyou know what I mean.
Speaker 2 (19:47):
Yeah, A lot of people going through what I slightly
described.
You don't think that anyoneelse has gone through it because
people don't talk about it orthey don't know what it is, and
it's like I said, it's a littlebit more prevalent now the words
to it.
Like I said, it's a little bitmore prevalent now the words to
it, but I've been able to helpwomen already with this because
(20:11):
they don't know what's going on.
And then you explain it.
So yeah, your pain.
I'm a firm believer in thatstatement.
Your pain is your purpose.
Speaker 1 (20:19):
It becomes your purpose.
100%, so you've been throughquite a bit.
100%, so you've been throughquite a bit.
How long?
And it may still be happening,but because there's so many
things that are still unfolding.
But how long did it take you tokind of navigate your divorce
process?
Speaker 2 (20:39):
So this is a fun, I'll tell this story.
So when I was getting divorcedso this is a fun, I'll tell this
story.
So when I was getting divorced,even though I'm a very powerful
person, you know vibrant,vivacious, outgoing personality,
the problem that I had that Idid not know I had was low
self-esteem or low self-worth.
And when I was getting divorcedI met someone else that
(21:03):
basically saw a weak-mindedwoman and I got involved with
this man and I'm also sograteful and I'll explain to you
why because he was even morehorrible, because he was more of
a real crazy person, person andthere was some physical things
(21:24):
and, um, I sought different kindof help and I went to a support
group for like, almost like adomestic violence type of thing
and I never was afraid of him oranything like that, but it was
like I sought this help.
So I go to the support groupand everyone's speaking and I
speak about this now a lotbecause if you went in the
support group, let's say, therewas 12 women.
(21:45):
Six were, let's say, in poverty, maybe addicts or stuff like
that, but six of us were uppermiddle-class women, some
affluent.
So please know that if you'rein a situation where in your
domestic violence.
It doesn't.
It doesn't matter what walk oflife you are, it does happen.
(22:05):
I think some people think it'sonly in certain sects of society
, but it's everywhere, butanyway.
So I went to this support groupand I started to learn I don't
have any issues with this guy inthat respect.
I learned what my ex-husbandwas.
Well, at that time I might'vestill been married, I don't know
(22:31):
and it was like an awakeningfor me Like, oh my God, that was
me.
I felt like that with him, notthis guy.
I felt like that with him, notthis guy.
So for me that wasn't even likenavigating divorce.
It was like an awakening for meLike, wow, I was just in a very
abusive marriage withoutknowing I was in it because
there was no physical abuse.
There was mental abuse,monetarily abuse, and you don't
(22:52):
know and let me ask you what youthink about this.
I find it hard to use the wordabuse, like I've said this
publicly on my social mediabecause everyone, or at least I
think like, oh, abuse, like yougot your ass kicked.
You get your ass kicked everyday, but no, it's.
You know, mental is almostworse.
(23:13):
You know, most of the time,people who have physical, have
mental as well.
I mean pretty much.
I can probably bet a milliondollars on that, but at least
with the physical, at one pointyou could say look, what's being
done to me, look, look, I havea black and blue look.
I'm not saying I don't wishthat on anyone, but it was an
awakening for me and I went onto be manipulated by both of
(23:39):
them at the same time, if youwill.
And then, once the divorce wasover, the other stuff didn't
stop, with the kids andeverything.
So I just I think for me thatwas my, my lessons, like I
started to do moreself-introspective, I started to
look into personal development,I started to listen to things,
I started to meditate.
You just start to seek help foryourself.
Speaker 1 (24:01):
Could we pinpoint what you just said?
Because that's where I wasgoing to go next Exactly, and
you mentioned it.
Okay, and what do you want?
What you just finished sayingto me, the way I perceive it, it
seems like you took 100%responsibility.
You didn't.
(24:22):
Maybe, at some point during theprocess, you might've blamed
them for certain things, butthere was a point that you just
described right now that to meit seems like you said enough is
enough.
I'm up to here of the bullshitor the pain, or the, or myself,
(24:42):
or my, or whatever it was foryou, and I decide to take
responsibility for my life, formy thoughts, for my situation,
If we don't know that we'rebeing abused, whatever that may
entail because it's a humongousparentheses and so many things
(25:05):
fall into that.
My best advice for anyone andnot just abuse, abuse, trauma.
Maybe you're in a workplacethat you dislike whatever, maybe
you have negative thoughtsthroughout the day, maybe you
don't like the story that you'retelling yourself.
I invite you to take 100%responsibility.
(25:28):
My parents, I, was raped.
Take 100% responsibility in thenow moment, right now, right
now, and the only work we can dois the work we do on ourself.
That is the best favor we can dofor the entire world.
I'll tell you real quickly,before we keep going with your
story, when I first startedcoaching so I opened my own
(25:54):
private coaching four years ago,but I've been doing the work
for longer than that and Istarted coaching to help others.
That's what I thought in mymind and that I was doing, and
all along it was to help myself.
And that I discovered that, ofcourse, much later, because the
exact case of my clients, to theexact details they, were parts
(26:20):
of me.
Speaker 2 (26:21):
Oh yes.
Speaker 1 (26:23):
That I still needed to work on that.
I still needed to see that Ineeded to explore from their
perspective and with their help.
So it's we're so much moreconnected than we think we are.
Speaker 2 (26:40):
Oh, my God.
Speaker 1 (26:41):
Like at such an interesting level.
Speaker 2 (26:48):
But I want to touch on something.
You just said it because I Isaid this to clients and and it
really is a aha moment and ittouches on what you just said.
So you're in a situation yeah,I was, was, you know, sometimes
I still do it you're in thatlike he's doing this and he's
this and he's that, and he'sthis or she, whatever, it is
(27:10):
right.
And then I finally said tomyself and I make my clients say
it to themselves wait a minute,why am I allowing this?
So, as soon as I had that, whyam I allowing this?
Then that's when the race wason, because it's like, yeah, I
could sit there and stay in thatloop the whole time, like why
(27:31):
is he doing this, why is hedoing this?
But like, why are you there?
Then, if you don't like it, whyare you there?
And then that's what made mesay like wait a second, why am I
there?
Why am I doing this?
And then you start to questionyourself and you get to know
yourself and why you're doingthe things you're doing, because
my favorite expression, whatyou allow is what will continue.
So it's you know.
(27:52):
It's like you said, it's taking100% responsibility for what's
going on.
You're not responsible thatthat person let's say, you want
to use someone that was is aphysically abused.
You're not responsible for themmaking you hate.
You, let's say but it's up toyou to get out of it and seek
help and do whatever.
You know some people can'tleave right away.
There's all things you can do,but, yeah, it is 100%.
(28:16):
I am in the here and now.
What can I do?
Not like?
Oh, my parents didn't havemoney?
No, okay, so we all haveparents that fucked us up in
some way, shape or form.
Okay, we all did.
They might've not meant it,they might've been the best
parents on the planet, and butthey did.
If you, if you look at societyright, it's like you are where
you were raised and it could bea good bed or not.
(28:38):
But if you're not happy with it, guess whose job it is now to
improve?
Change you.
So we spoke about this.
You know when we met it's.
You know, when you have thatawareness and the accountability
, then you know all the otherthings come a lot easier.
It's not I shouldn't say easy.
It's simple, but a lot of thiswork is not easy, but you have
(29:01):
to do it.
So 100% responsibility foryourselves.
And when you take your powerback and taking your power back
is taking responsibility so ifyou take your power back because
when you're giving it away toother people, then you're
powerless.
So when you actually I say thisall the time if you're blaming
(29:23):
someone, you're actuallypowerless it's actually giving
your power away.
So taking responsibility isactually powerful.
It's the opposite of whatpeople think, like I take
responsibility, so that meansthat it's not their fault,
whatever.
No, you take responsibility ispowerful because now you're in
power, I can do something aboutthis.
Speaker 1 (29:44):
Yeah, when I was connecting with my guides, they
mentioned responsibility as ourresponse and ability, and then
they broke it into two and theysaid it's our ability to respond
respond to what happens to us.
I very much resonate with whatyou're sharing and with your
(30:12):
journey, because you've hadcourage takes a lot of courage
to look within, to look at ourwounds, to lick our own wounds,
to sew yourself back together,to seek for help.
So you went through all thesethings.
(30:32):
You lost your sister, you had arough childhood X, y, z,
whatever you know.
You lost your sister.
You went through a verydifficult divorce.
Yes, and how did you?
How did it look like?
Getting to the light at the endof the tunnel?
(30:54):
Like you started personaldevelopment and you met a mentor
, you met a friend thatintroduced you, you read a book
that changed your life and youwant to recommit.
How does that like okay,there's a way out at least.
Right, something at the end ofthe tunnel?
Like how did that littleroadmap kind of look like for
(31:14):
you?
Speaker 2 (31:16):
You know you're on that road without knowing you're
on that road once you wake upto it.
But for me, I can'tspecifically think of anything
at the moment of like exact, Ido remember looking at believe
it or not how to do with my kidsand like how to be a better
parent, like with thecommunication and stuff and just
parenting, which I candefinitely help people nowadays
(31:37):
with that, because there's notmany parents out there that want
to be parents, but that's awhole nother podcast.
But I think it was just likelearning, like being open to
learning and how to be improvemyself.
And Abraham Hicks I don't knowif you're familiar with like
let's sort of listen to AbrahamHicks and meditations and a lot
(31:57):
of I am affirmations and that'swhy I am grateful for everything
, cause when I felt so alone,cause I really didn't have
anybody, who do you have?
You have yourself right and youjust start to gain confidence
and get to know who you are andlove yourself or like yourself.
And as you like yourself, youstart to do more things for
(32:18):
yourself and look into thingsand actually, look, I'm a
research queen, so I wasprobably researching and looking
at things and I'll researcheverything and that's probably
how I found it was by research alot of it, and I have a good
friend that recommended AbrahamHicks.
But I think it's just that selfdiscovery, personal development,
how can it, without saying toyourself like, how can I improve
(32:40):
myself?
You're just on this journey and, if you want to say, your
guides or the universe juststarted to kind of push me that
way and I I'm still on that road.
You know you're always learning, we're always becoming more and
more enlightened.
You know you don't becomeenlightened and then that's it.
You just keep going and goingand growing and, like I say, my
(33:02):
glow, like I was always taughtto be small and not be that
shining light that you are.
So then, once I started to bethis shining light and be
comfortable with it and I'mstill sometimes have issues, you
know because but you thenbecome confident and you know if
you want to use, let's say,abuse as an example, you know
that you will never, ever put upwith that again, ever, ever.
(33:26):
And for me, you know I like totell clients in the divorce sect
is that for me and I have avery different personality, so
you can't.
You know there are people thatmight not be able to do this,
but I literally did everythingby myself.
I had another boyfriend afterthat.
I was a very nice guy, whateverit didn't work out and I
started to do everything bymyself.
I'd go to concerts and I'd goto here and I had the best
(33:48):
fucking time.
I'm a lot of fun, and so youknow and I just started to if
you want to use that term, dateyourself, and I started to use
this analogy of that you want tobecome, and I don't even think
you need to go through divorcefor this.
I think everyone needs to dothis in their lifetime, even as
young adults going intoadulthood, you become an Island
and you are your Island andeverything you need is on that
(34:10):
Island your love, yourvalidation, your food, your
water, everything that issustaining for you.
You don't need anything fromanywhere else, and once you're
comfortable being on that islandand you have everything you
need within yourself, then maybeyou want to invite people on
that island to share your lifewith you, because we are
conditioned in society, in myopinion, to look outward for our
(34:32):
love, for our validation, foreverything is outward.
Even our connection to whateveryou want to call it is outward.
Go to this building, go, dothis, do this, and I don't even
want to get into that subject,but you know what I mean.
We're taught to go outward,like, look outside of yourself
is where it all is, and guesswhat?
No, everything is here.
The power that creates worldsis right here in front of you.
(34:55):
When you look in that mirror,you are the most powerful person
.
And I even have a hard timesometimes saying like to myself.
You know I'm very hard onmyself.
And another thing I want yourlisteners to know that we're in
this space and we may be here,but we still have the same
issues, it's they still creep in.
We're not these perfect beings.
You know I'm I'm been very notnice to myself lately, verbally,
(35:19):
you know verbally, and I amvery aware of that lately, you
know, like yo, you gotta likewatch your I ams.
You know I call it the I.
You know I am what I am two ofthe most powerful words you can
say, because what comes afterthat is your truth.
So if you're listening, we'renot perfect, but we just we'll
catch it quicker.
(35:39):
But yeah, that's that's.
You know, it's all about beingopen and aware and willing to do
the, do the hard work, and alot of times it's the feelings.
It's the feelings that don'tfeel good, but when you push
through them, you get to theother side.
Speaker 1 (36:01):
Thank you so much for sharing that.
I feel like a lot of people aregoing to resonate with what
you're sharing and I will touchon something personal, um that
I'm going through, um, so peoplecan feel heard and seen and
identified with because, likeyou mentioned, there's no
(36:24):
exception.
I'm no exception to any rule Um, just living this human
experience like everybody else,jumping the obstacles and
learning different tools thathelp me.
Right now I'm working with acoach.
By the way, I invite coaches tohave coaches.
We also need another reflectionto reflect back to us, or
(36:51):
another perspective of certainthings we can't see.
Just because we've been doingit long enough doesn't mean that
we don't benefit from being astudent in this type of work.
So I've been working a lot withfinding a different type of
balance between my feminine andmasculine For so long.
(37:14):
For many years I operated 90%masculine and 10% feminine and
that worked for a while and Iachieved a lot of success and I
did a lot of things with thatand I'm grateful.
But there was a point in mylife especially after certain
health issues, um, where Iwanted I, I craved my femininity
(37:37):
and I wanted to embody thatmore and I just had no clue how
to do that.
I, I, that was not myconditioning, um.
So I've been transitioning thatand being aware of how I talk
to myself, how I cultivate mygarden within me in all aspects
(37:59):
right, whether it's spirituality, relationship, finances, all of
it inside.
That doesn't depend on outsideapproval from social media, from
your partner, from whateverright.
So one of the things I have beendoing to cultivate that has
been painting.
Painting puts me in a placewhere I feel free.
(38:21):
I feel very connected to myfeminine, to my goddess creative
side.
I feel connected to God.
I feel connected to God.
So just explore differentthings, different avenues.
Maybe it's dancing, maybe it'sbreath work, maybe it's plant
medicine, whatever.
Maybe it's a walk in nature,trekking or biking, but just
(38:44):
explore your relationship withyourself.
I feel like one of the biggestrelationships and the soulmate.
One of the soulmates that we'relooking for is ourselves, like
(39:06):
our connection to our higherself, or what our soul really
wants to do, how it feels joy,how it finds joy in this life,
how it thrives.
And then from that place it'ssuch a powerful place because
it's your roots.
If your foundation is made inthe sand and it hasn't taken
root, any obstacle that comesalong is just going to sweep you
away.
It's just, it's not, it's notgoing to take.
(39:27):
So working in ourself-reflection and our
relationship with ourselves hasbeen one of the most helpful
things I've ever done for myself.
Speaker 2 (39:40):
I agree, and it's an ongoing process.
It's not like going to schoolfor X amount of time and then
you're done.
It's literally constant.
It's a daily activity.
Daily activity, you know it'san activity.
Speaker 1 (39:54):
What are, what are, some of your daily activities
that you like to do?
Speaker 2 (39:57):
okay, so I start my day with um, I just started.
I always journal, but now I'mdoing a brain dump first.
So I I start with, you know,journaling, uh, and then I do
gratitude and I kind of saywhat's on my mind, because I
used to not do that.
I used to think my journalshould just be grateful and
everything's gratitude, and thenthe rest would be in my head
(40:20):
and it wouldn't stay therebecause I'll tell you about my
next step.
But I now like write somethings, you know so journal, get
it all out and then do thegratitude and then I do a
stretch meditation.
I'll stretch for about I don'tknow anywhere 20 minutes or so
with type of like affirmationsor something type of meditation.
And I love I personally lovegoing on YouTube and like I have
(40:41):
my favorites or just Googlesomething that's bothering me,
and I'll be like you know,meditation for whatever X, y, z,
and then I do a full and thenI'll do whatever time I have
left I'll devote to a regularquote, regular meditation,
either a visualization or juststillness, quiet, and that is a
non-negotiable for me.
(41:02):
I do that every day and for me,even if I feel like it's not
doing anything, it's definitelydoing an immense amount, and I'm
sure you know about meditationand the benefits and that is one
of the most simplest ways tohelp yourself.
And you know it's not only justsitting crisscross applesauce
(41:23):
on the.
You know I say this and forgotif I said it on one of my posts.
It's not about wearing, youknow, lululemons and
Birkenstocks and, you know,eating granola.
You know it's not anything likethat.
It's about just quieting yourmind.
And if you can't do that,that's fine.
Maybe have a guided meditationand taking that time out to
connect to you and you.
You know the power of the worldbecause we're so, especially
(41:46):
nowadays, we're so filled withelectronics and this and school
and kids, blah, blah, blah.
And then you can't hear yourhigher being, you can't hear
your inner being.
You can't hear it if it'scluttered.
So it helps you be able to hear, okay, and then those are the
two things that I swear by, andthen obviously, there's other
(42:11):
things throughout the day that Ido.
Speaker 1 (42:13):
Thank you for sharing that.
I wanted to.
I concur with that a hundredpercent and I invite people to
play around with it until youfind a routine that you like
that feels good for you.
I want to touch on exercisebecause to me, exercise is way
more than that is is related tomental health, is related to
(42:37):
coping, it's related, it'srelated to everything, um, and
nutrition as well, and there's alot of misinformation um out
there, unfortunately, um, our,our food has been tampered with
our mental health, includingthat, both diagnosis and
medication, for, just to call itsomething, the big pharma or
(43:02):
you know, just um, whatever anyother agenda but, um, the
wellbeing of humanity as a whole, but the wellbeing of humanity
as a whole.
So I feel like, again, we goback to taking responsibility as
an individual.
What can we do?
And in this case, I would likefor you to speak about what your
(43:26):
road with staying healthy, withexercise, with nutrition, has
been, because that's such a keypart.
That's something I strugglewith and maybe one-on-one you
and I can work through that,because I have been going
through that.
You know, with my hormones,with age, everything changes.
It's harder to lose the weightLike.
I was always 103, 113 at themost.
(43:49):
In the past, say, four years,I've had not been able to lose
the weight, um, and I've done somuch Um, so it's definitely,
you know, um, a challenge thatis here to be transcended,
worked with, understood and um,which I appreciate because I've
(44:09):
been able to look at nutrients,at food, at the microbiome, at
gut health, the gut brain axis,and just so many things that if
I had not gone through that,maybe I had never stopped to
look at it.
So what has been your personaljourney with the weight, with
menopause, with the healthaspect of that?
Speaker 2 (44:30):
Well, like I touched on before, I was like a heavy
kid and then when I got towhatever age I was 15, I lost
weight and got in shape.
I was always athletic and I gota lot of attention for that.
So move forward and I'mskipping over years, but I
became a professional figureathlete.
You're like a, a bodybuilder,but it's not bodybuilding, it's
(44:51):
more like feminine, and so ofcourse I know about exercise and
nutrition to get into that kindof shape and it is a very big
part of my day.
I didn't bring that up, I wasonly going for, like, the
spiritual and mental health.
But like I, I have to train.
Like it's something in betterthan me.
I have to.
There are days I don't want to,but it's just part.
So I definitely train.
(45:12):
I do weight training and, youknow, um, elliptical.
Now I have some back problems,you know, can't really jog, but
like that is definitely part ofa very important part of my day.
And sometimes I have to remindmyself why.
Because you know, are you doingit for vanity reasons or you're
doing for health reasons andbringing up the menopause, which
we both discussed?
(45:32):
So I always keep going to thegym because it's so healthy for
you, right, but it getsfrustrating when you feel like
it's not doing anything.
I mean it is per se, but youknow I tend to get overwhelmed
when you start to get into thehealthy and the stuff about food
and everything.
And I just try and be ashealthy as I can and not really
(45:52):
think too much about it if I'mnot buying organic chicken that
day or whatever.
But I try and eat clean, whichmeans like trying to eat junk
and all that crap and try andmaintain weight and so menopause
I mean I feel like I'm insomeone else's body.
That's what I feel like,especially coming from my
background.
That was my occupation, I knewwhat to do.
(46:16):
So now that you know what to doand it's not working, it's quite
frustrating.
So I also feel like it's a whatwas the word?
You said?
Oh, challenge.
Okay, I feel like it's achallenge and it's also a way
for me to say like, okay, whatif you stayed the way you were
and you're not going to belooked at anymore for your
(46:39):
definition Cause I'm certainlynot defined right now Like your
definition and for being inshape.
I mean, people see me, theyknow you're in shape, but I'm
talking about, like, what I'mused to.
What if that's not what youridentity is anymore?
Speaker 1 (46:52):
Can we pause?
Yeah, guys, going throughidentity crisis and what we base
, who we are, and our value andattention and love.
Ultimately, it comes down to asa humanity and I include myself
(47:14):
very much in this one of thebig woundings is self-worth.
Speaker 2 (47:19):
Absolutely.
Speaker 1 (47:20):
As a humanity, as a collective, the collective,
unconscious.
It is completely wounded withthe unworthiness that is
something at the deepest levelabuse, abandonment, all of it,
and I've worked with so manyclients Abandonment, all of it,
(47:42):
and I've worked with so manyclients.
We go to what's underneath thatand it comes down to self-worth
.
Oh yeah, so it's important tofind that inner garden and
cultivate it, regardless ofwhat's going on outside.
Absolutely garden and cultivateit regardless of what's going on
outside, regardless of yourprofession, regardless of your
(48:10):
looks, regardless of who youthink you are.
So when I do breathwork and Ilead people, one of the things
the introductory I use a lot ofhealing Icaros, which are songs
from the Amazon and things likethat, and there's a space that
we get to where everybody's kindof like the walls are down and
you're a little bit more relaxed.
I say, okay, so start imagininglike you're taking off all of
(48:31):
the layers that define you yourprofession, being a mother,
being a daughter, being a human,your name, right.
Then they eventually get to bethis little ball of light, like
a second sun, right.
So from there, from beingenergy, from being love, from
your true essence, reallynothing outside of you can
(48:53):
really do anything.
It's just an experience to belived, to be felt, to be
transformed to all of thosethings.
And thank you for being honestand vulnerable while being a
coach, because I feel being aleader, being a coach, being a
conscious leader, that couldalso be a trap for us.
(49:20):
Being this perfect white light,love being there's a lot more
than that in in this work,absolutely so it takes guts to
stand here and say again I, youknow, uh, you know we're going
through identity cases and lifeand death and rebirth, and
(49:42):
that's the real shit that'shappening.
Yeah, we do nothing by comingon here and say, oh perfect,
come, come, come, do a sessionwith me.
That's not going to helpanybody.
You know we're working throughthis shit together.
Okay, maybe somebody that's 80can come and talk to you and be
like, oh honey, that's nothing,I've been through that or
(50:04):
whatever they're like you know.
Um, but maybe somebody like methat's kind of dipping their
toes in that and you're ahead ofthe curve, then we can work
together and then you can guideme and be like all right, I got
you.
You know, let me, let me walkyou through this.
So thank you for being open andtrue and I feel that
(50:26):
authenticity If you guys arewatching the video and not just
listening.
Speaker 2 (50:33):
She's the real deal, I am the real deal, I am the
real deal.
Speaker 1 (50:35):
I like that.
Speaker 2 (50:36):
And I'm glad that you brought that up, because I did
a I think it was a social mediapost and since we're speaking
about menopause the whole entiretime here, I feel like I
haven't said what I wanted tosay because I have menopause
brain, so, like excuse, I mean,my brain feels like it's it's.
It's a horrible feeling.
But what I wanted to say isthat I actually even made a post
(50:57):
of that, something to theeffect of when I'm speaking to
you, meeting social media, I'mreally talking to myself as a
reminder when I'm helping you.
I might not even need it, butit reminds me.
It reminds me of where I camefrom.
It reminds me of how much I'vegrown.
(51:17):
It reminds me of how powerful Iam and how worthy and deserving
I am and you are and everyoneis.
And it reminds me of not to belike.
You know.
I have a very bad habit rightnow, speaking of menopause is I.
The second I wake up, I look inthe mirror and I'm just like,
(51:39):
like, and just today in general,like, why are you starting your
day like that, with looking atyourself and saying that you
know what?
You don't look like?
You did and maybe you willagain.
I'm very confident in that.
But, like, stop looking atfirst of all what you look like
anyway and how you're going tostart your day and just look
within.
(51:59):
You know, in one of my rooms Igo, I stretch in one room but I
lay down and do meditation inanother room because there's a
bed in there and there's amirror in there and I just
pretty new about a week, a weekand a half, maybe two weeks I've
literally talked to myself inthe mirror as if I'm the little
girl or as if I am looking atmyself as is, as like someone
else.
And what would you, what wouldyou say to yourself?
(52:20):
Am looking at myself as is, aslike someone else, and what
would what would you say toyourself?
I did a post today somethinglike I would never speak to my
children or my husband the way Ispeak to myself sometimes.
So I got to check that like Ihave to speak to myself the same
way I would speak to someone Ilove with all my heart.
So you know, we're definitelynot perfect beings.
Even though we could guide youto a higher place or guide you
(52:44):
to where you want to be, doesn'tmean that we are perfect.
Speaker 1 (52:49):
Yeah, and another thing I want to point out is in
regards to when it comes tocoaching, like for me, my, the
coaching session I had with my,with one of my coaches it's
nothing new.
We're not telling you.
Essentially, if you're reallyreally in the, in the core of
your being, you already know.
Yes, we are just reflectingback to you maybe a different
(53:15):
angle or maybe something thateven triggers you, because one
of the things she said to me oh,this is a possibility, and my
answer to her and I noticed howdefensive it was I said
absolutely not.
And I was like and I caughtmyself and I'm like so
(53:38):
interesting that I answered inthat way and that I felt
triggered by what you said to me.
So thank you for bringing it up.
So, yeah, it's constant work.
Speaker 2 (53:49):
The very thing, and I said this conversation with my
husband before I got on here andit wasn't.
It was kind of like that.
I actually said, like you know,we need, we, we all need to ask
ourselves sometimes why youanswer in certain ways, because
it usually has nothing to dowith the person.
It's, yeah, what's going on inyou.
(54:11):
You know what I mean and it'snot.
It's not fun to hear that, youknow, when you're not in a mood
to hear it.
So a lot of times you getdefensive or whatever.
Like I said, we're all humanand you know, sometimes you go
back to that knee jerk reactionto things or things that you
didn't uncover yet or not fullyor fully healed from, or
whatever it may be.
(54:31):
You know, so it's.
You know.
My whole thing with people iswhat I've learned is I want to
awaken and inspire people, butyou also can't do that to anyone
that's not ready for it orwilling.
Speaker 1 (54:45):
Thank you for also pointing that out.
Tell me a little bit about howyou help people now.
Um, cause I know you've had atransition, um, pretty much.
Um, how does it look like like?
What type of services do youoffer?
How does how does that looklike, Cause I know you're very
(55:06):
multifaceted, Um, so tell us alittle bit about that.
Speaker 2 (55:12):
So, like I said, I'm like at the core personal
development coach, if you will,and help people create a life
they fucking love, with mindsetshifts, reclaiming their power,
finding happiness and innerpeace within themselves.
And I specialize, or I have aspecialty, in the women who are
either going through divorce orin a toxic relationship or just
(55:34):
the low self-esteem like, allthat confidence, whatever.
So, for right now, I have myown podcast, which I love
because that's personaldevelopment all over the place.
It's called the Elise MorganExperience Podcast.
I have my Instagram page andI'm working on a book is coming
out, and how you can work withme is I have a few things up in
(55:57):
the air.
So I'm having, locally inFlorida, going to be setting up
a like a one day retreat forthese women to so they can teach
them some ways to get eitherthrough it or past it.
And also, you know, coaching.
You know so one-on-one coachingis, you know, always great
People.
People love being coachedthemselves and also having, you
(56:20):
know that one-on-one attentionand also group coaching.
So, like, I have a whole arrayof how you can work with me, so
I urge you to get in touch withme.
You know, free discovery call,it's just no strings attached,
just want to hear your story,see if I can help you and help
you right on the phone, right onthe discovery call.
(56:41):
You know you'll get.
You'll get something you needon that call, whether we work
together or not, because that'swhat I'm here for.
I'm here to serve you, I'm hereto help you.
So whether you continue with meis up to you, but you will get
something on the call.
Speaker 1 (56:54):
So that's beautiful.
Thank you so much.
We're going to put all of theinformation in the description
so they can reach out.
It could be easy and they'llknow how to find you.
Is there any last messages youwant to leave the listeners with
or any last messages in generalyou want to share?
Speaker 2 (57:14):
I see you, I know you and I love you, and you are
worthy and deserving of a lifeyou absolutely love.
Speaker 1 (57:31):
Wow, well, I needed to hear that at least.
So thank you.
Speaker 2 (57:40):
I actually got tears in my eyes saying that, because
I think I was saying it tomyself.
So thank you for having me.
Speaker 1 (57:44):
Thank you, Elise.
The honor is all mine.
Thank you.
Speaker 2 (57:48):
Thank you so much.
Hi Elise, welcome to Quantum Alchemist Mastered
Podcast.
It's a pleasure to have youhere.
I'm excited to hear a littlebit about you, your hero's
journey, how you got to whereyou are today, and please share
from your heart whatever comesup, whatever you want to share
about yourself.
Speaker 2 (00:18):
Well, I am so grateful to be here with you and
I am so grateful that you arehaving this podcast for everyone
to learn about themselves andwho they are as humans.
And about me.
Well, I think I've got herefrom the School of Hard Knocks a
very long education in theSchool of Hard Knocks, so we can
(00:41):
get more into that if you'dlike.
But basically, life thatbrought you to a awakening of
your mind and and take yourresponsibility for yourself and
your actions and who you are andbe as a person.
Speaker 1 (00:55):
So I, as you know, cause we, we met slightly before
, uh, just a couple of daysprior to this, to to talk a
little bit about the dynamicsand stuff, and I told you I have
no clue where this is going togo, and sure thing.
So now I feel called to talkabout your childhood.
What was that like?
Speaker 2 (01:17):
You know it's funny.
I was just thinking about thisthe other day.
So thank you for bringing it up, because I've been, I just
started to do more inner childwork and brought back a.
It brought back a lot ofemotions.
So I had a great childhood inthe aspect of we were an upper
middle class family.
You didn't want from anything.
(01:37):
My father was a very funny guy.
It was always fun to be aroundand I was daddy's little girl.
I had two older brothers and Ihad a younger sister and we
could speak about her.
She had committed suicide, butgrowing up as children we were
all together, obviously.
So I was very close in age withmy sister and tight with her.
Two older brothers, much olderones, 11 years older, one six
years older and just, I have alot of good memories because
(02:01):
they're of being fun, you know,and that kind of stuff.
But now, as an adult, lookingback, I realized I wasn't really
ever seen or heard and you feellike invisible and unimportant
and none of those words come outof your parents mouths.
But that is the unspoken wordand I also I don't really
(02:26):
remember the age I can't sayspecifically I had gotten very
overweight.
So not only, and I justactually said this to my husband
the other day.
We were speaking about thechild stuff and I was like you
know, I never really got madefun of from friends or anything
like that, but my family wouldmake fun of me.
So my childhood was like thisyou know, you're not really
(02:52):
accepted for what you are.
You're no one's even asking youyour opinion.
You're just, you know, justseen and not heard.
Not seen, not heard seen andnot heard.
Speaker 1 (03:06):
not seen, not heard.
Thank you for bringing this up,because when we're dealing with
specifically the subconsciousmind, which runs a lot of our
programming, and if you're not,if you haven't done a lot of the
work, you know it's hard tobring it into our awareness that
that's even happening to us andwe don't necessarily have to go
(03:27):
through big traumas.
You know, like abuse orsomething like that, it could be
things like this, and I'm notsaying you haven't, I haven't
touched on that with you.
I'm just saying in general, youknow, we don't necessarily have
to go through a big trauma tohave things.
We all have things that that weneed to work on and and things
(03:50):
that happened to us that, um,we're just learning and looking
back in retrospect and and kindof putting those parts back
together, um, kind of puttingthose pieces, those parts of us
that maybe wouldn't know how tocope.
As you know a lot of the innerchild work and stuff like that,
know a lot of the inner childwork and stuff like that.
I would like to, if you can,speak about, about your sister.
How old were you when thathappened?
(04:11):
19.
19.
That must've been.
I cannot even, I have not gonethrough that.
I cannot imagine what yourreality must've been completely
shattered, your heart, your soul.
If you guys were, were close, Iimagine it's like missing half
(04:31):
of your soul, like somebody soclose, kind of how did you cope?
Speaker 2 (04:35):
with that.
Like what?
How did that go?
You know, she had, in myopinion now as an adult and
knowing where I know, know aboutthis whole world.
I think a lot of it was broughton by the medications that she
was given.
She had like depression issuesand stuff, and I think I believe
the suicide in and of itselfwas caused by the medications.
(04:57):
This has gone back many, manyyears ago and they didn't know
half of what they know now andeven now they don't really know
much.
So how did I cope?
First of all, it was and I andI don't, and you know if she was
here right now she wouldunderstand how.
Why I'm saying this it was alittle bit of a relief, and not
that you know you don't wantyour sister in your life, but
because of you know where shewas in her life and the in and
(05:19):
out of mental institutions,whether she should have been
there or not, and there's thechaos of the family quote
unquote caused by her.
So it was almost like a.
It was like a relief becauseand I've spoken to other people
about this so it's like youalmost feel guilty because
you're relieved because of allthe problems and everything.
But in the other aspect of howdo you cope as this.
(05:41):
You know your um, it, it's,it's, it's so different.
I'm trying to think back howspecifically because I've always
been kind of into a higherconsciousness without knowing I
was um, I did not have a verysupportive boyfriend at the time
, so I was like thinking I, Ibrought this up to myself the
(06:03):
other day.
This is why I'm so I can try toget the words out to say what I
want to say.
I wasn't supported to what.
Like how are you doing Elise?
I was never asked like how areyou doing Elise?
It was more like you know,everyone kind of just went about
their life.
You know, we all as a familywere mourning, but no one ever
(06:23):
really asked me how I was doing,and I've always been the
caretaker for other people.
Like, how are you doing?
So I don't think I.
I even took the time out to saylike how am I doing?
You know, of course you'remourning, you're crying, and I
just think I don't want to sayignored it.
But I just like moved onquicker than I think I probably
(06:48):
should have.
And then, as I got a littleolder, then I started to go
through some work, like writingher letters and saying I miss
her and some of the things, andjust, you know, I think people
push it under the rug.
At least that's what my familyseemed to have done.
And you know my coping was.
You know I was young, you know,and like you know, you just
(07:11):
continue with your life.
You know everyone's going out,you know going dancing every
weekend and like you know, youcry, you have your time, you
have your funeral and then youkind of like go back to life and
I don't think I gave myself achance to mourn fully for her at
the time.
Speaker 1 (07:27):
Thank you for sharing that you still have both of
your parents alive.
Speaker 2 (07:34):
No, my dad died very, he was very young, that was.
You know.
You said this before.
The word trauma, and I thinkfor me the word trauma I don't
like to use it, I think peopleuse it way too much, but that
was very a, I think, for me.
The word trauma I don't like touse it, I think people use it
way too much, but that was verya big thing for me.
I was very close with my dad.
He died when he was 55 and mymom is alive now.
She's in her mid eighties, butto me my mom died a long time
(07:57):
ago because she's just, she'sjust existing.
So but to answer your question,the long, the long, short of it
is the short, long of it.
Whichever way you want to saythat my mom is still alive, yes,
Okay.
Speaker 1 (08:09):
So a lot of the reasons why I asked all of these
things is because, from my ownpersonal experiences, my
challenges, I like to see themas challenges, not traumas.
(08:40):
To me they're all initiations tothe soul for the spirit to just
expand, continue expanding.
But what I want to get to andhow I want to shift this
conversation is I know that nowa lot of the work that you do is
helping other people overcomeall of these obstacles.
(09:01):
But what I like, before we getinto what you do, is to talk
about some of the pain points,because we are in this position
having gone through the fire,having gone through the darkness
, having walked on the fireourselves.
We know what it feels.
We know what it feels like whenyou're in darkness, when you
(09:22):
can't see a way out, and a lotof the tools I'm sure that you
share in your coaching and inyour services is what has served
you, the tools that allowed youto get through this.
So that's why I get so personal, because we don't do this just
(09:44):
as a sales pitch or as no.
We we lived it and we areliving it, just in different,
you know, from different aspectsand and different scenarios now
in our lives.
Have you ever been throughdivorce?
Speaker 2 (10:00):
Yes.
Speaker 1 (10:01):
Okay, that's another big thing.
A lot of our clients have beenthrough divorce, have been
through loss, have been throughdepression, mental health.
If we keep avoiding theseconversations, if we keep
pushing it under the rug howwe've done it for so long just
to be able to survive and thrivein life and you know, whatever
(10:24):
pay your mortgage, your, your,your stuff, I get it, um, but
it's really I don't, I don'tbelieve it's serving us.
In this point, I think it isthe time to to sit with that, to
bring light to that, to reflect, to introspect, to question
everything about ourselves, likeour thoughts, if you have
(10:48):
suicidal thoughts, so why am Ihaving those?
What's the root cause of that?
Why is it coming up?
Menopause, we'll talk aboutthat too.
Basically, your curriculum islike you have all the check
boxes.
Speaker 2 (11:03):
Like I said, it's a school of hard knocks.
Like you have all the check,all the check boxes.
Like I said, it's a school ofhard knocks.
Well, I'm going to touch onthat because you know I'm a firm
believer and I have a feelingyou're going to agree with this
that and you can use the diamondin a rough, like diamonds
cannot become diamonds withoutall that high pressure.
And I don't think anyone.
You know, maybe you're bornelevated.
(11:24):
You know to the place, you know.
Maybe you're born elevated, youknow to the place, maybe you
are.
But chances are that you've gonethrough some deep shit, dark
places that you never thought,or maybe you thought you're
going to be there forever andthen you come out on the other
side and that is where you growand that's where you elevate and
that's where you become moreawake.
And you know, no one wants tofeel some of these things, but
(11:45):
the feeling of the shitty shitis what gets you to a higher
place.
And you know, when you're onthe other side, you know the
dark side.
You may not think that.
So we are lighthouses.
That's what I like to say.
We are lighthouses in people'sstorms because when you're going
in it and you don't see amentor if you will, or a coach
(12:05):
or someone, then you wouldn'tknow.
So how would you know thatthere's life on the other side?
There's, you know.
I call it the happily everafter, and you brought up
divorce and that's like myspecialty.
I'm not really happy about it,that that's my specialty, but
it's my specialty because that'swhat I overcame.
We spoke about the death of mydad and my sister, but one of
(12:27):
the biggest things that I'vegone through was my divorce from
my children's father.
I'm now remarried, but that wasone of the darkest times of my
life.
Speaker 1 (12:38):
Could you share anything about that time, if
it's okay?
Speaker 2 (12:42):
I will.
It's hard for me to share itand we've discussed this
privately, but I will touch onit.
For starters, I'm grateful forit all, truly, truly, truly
grateful for every part of it,and for me it was that and I did
not know at the time when I wasleaving that my ex-husband was
(13:06):
a narcissist, and if he hearsthis he will argue that fact.
But that is my opinion.
So, if you want me to be, thisis my opinion of what I've
learned.
And I thought that since wewere together I was with him
since I was 15 years old and Ithought that, since we were high
(13:26):
school sweethearts and you knowwe were together for a very,
very long time that we would be,it would be amicable and that
we would be friends and I was soexcited to be able to have that
healthy breakup.
If you will and it didn't gothat way, you know and if you
want to get into the whole thing, I'm sure your listeners would
(13:51):
love to hear about narcissism orthey might not even know
they're going through it, butthe whole thing happens when you
leave them or tell them theydon't want to be with them
anymore, and there's smearcampaigns, they lie, they go
behind your back and tell peoplethings that aren't true, to
make people side with them.
And the most hurtful thing forme, that it was done to my
children and it.
(14:12):
You know not to get intospecifics, but it was a very
horrible time for me because Idid not know what it was Now.
Now it's very prevalent to haveit's called parent alienation
and you know he'll, if he everheard this, I'm sure he would
fight me to the end that henever did that, but he did, and
that was my experience with him.
Might not be someone else's,but my experience with him was
(14:33):
that and I thought I was goingcrazy.
I didn't know what was going on.
Thankfully, now that I knowabout it, I always had my
children.
They weren't like gone, but Igot the scraps.
So that period of time for mewas dark because since he played
the victim so hardcore, myfamily kind of took his side.
(14:56):
So not only are you goingthrough this thing, not only are
you going through all theemotions of like your kids and
the whole thing.
Your family is not evensupporting you.
They weren't not.
They were not in my life, butlike.
They weren't supportive.
You know they.
They basically like I don'twant to use the term turn their
(15:16):
back on me, because that wasn'tthe case at one part.
Sometimes it was, but yeah, butthat's why it was very, very,
very hard for me and I'm stillunpacking a lot of that, because
I don't think I realized howmuch mental abuse went on.
I'm still unpacking a lot ofthat.
Speaker 1 (15:35):
Thank you for being vulnerable first.
I know it's a very privatematter and sharing it with us,
but believe me, your voice isthe voice of millions yes,
that's what's inspired me totell it, because I don't want to
interrupt you.
Speaker 2 (15:49):
But, rosalia, this has been one of my stories that
I've been holding in out of fear, and I'll, and I'm going to
tell the reader, the listeners,this because they might have the
same fear.
It's because I know what he'scapable of doing and you know,
and my and my kids are grown mennow, but they're still.
They stand by.
If it came push to shove, theymight get very defensive.
(16:10):
I'm not scared.
I'm going to lose.
I can't believe I'm going allout here.
But screw it.
This is what we're doing.
This is why we do what we do.
I don't mind telling the storyto anyone, but I do mind if,
like I, have a very, very bigfear of not losing my kids.
But just our relationship isgreat and I just don't want
(16:33):
anything to get in the way ofthat.
And it may here.
Speaker 1 (16:37):
I'll say this I'll say this so that you don't have
you don't feel because cause I,I know, uh, on a one-to-one you
will come all out with yourclients and with your friends
and you would just dive deepinto the real shit, pretty much,
um.
So here's what we do at the endwe're going to share how you're
(16:58):
helping everybody else, how youknow what you offer and stuff
like that.
There's so many people goingthrough divorce, both men and
women.
The bottom line of this isyou've been through it and it's
dragged on and it's been messy,which usually most of them are,
(17:19):
um, and you have a lot ofexperience with it.
So, if anybody really wants todive deep and personal because
we're mirrors of each other,we're students, both students
and teacher, even though you'rethe coach A lot of these things
help us identify with it andkind of see how you see it
differently or how youunderstand it differently, or
(17:39):
sometimes even recognize thingsthat you didn't know they were
like narcissistic traits, forexample.
So I will leave it, if anyone'sinterested, to dive deep into
this particular conversationabout divorce, about how to get
through it, how to transcend itand to transform that into your
purpose, and helping peoplethrough divorce has been part of
(18:07):
your purpose and continues tobe so, just for the sake of
keeping certain details that aremore private out.
Speaker 2 (18:18):
Oh, I basically went all out.
I didn't get it.
Speaker 1 (18:21):
Well, no, because I'm sure there's a lot of specifics
and a lot of things that a lotof people will identify with,
but I would much rather, um, youknow, if you offer, like a
discovery call or something likethat, or, or however you want
them to reach out, um, thatwould be a good, a good starting
point.
(18:41):
Start somewhere, ask for help.
If you're going through, if youfeel like you first of all, if
you're suicidal, please reachout for help, okay.
If you're going through mentalhealth, if you're going through
divorce, if you're in a darkplace, all of us as a humanity,
we're ascending in consciousnesstogether.
What that's going to entail?
(19:03):
A lot of chaos, perceived chaos,from our limited perception.
You know, our life is going tocrumble, probably 360 degrees,
you know, and your health, yourmarriage, your all of it,
because it's like the Phoenixrising right.
Something has to die forsomething new to be rebirth, and
(19:23):
you have a lot of experiencewith death and rebirth.
So I would just encouragesomebody we're going to put in
the description, however,they're going to be able to
reach you, um, and they canreally, really dive deep into
this, into this conversation.
Okay, Cause I don't want to putanything here that, yes, it may
be liberating for us and it mayhelp someone else, but it may
(19:44):
hurt somebody else as well, soyou know what I mean.
Speaker 2 (19:47):
Yeah, A lot of people going through what I slightly
described.
You don't think that anyoneelse has gone through it because
people don't talk about it orthey don't know what it is, and
it's like I said, it's a littlebit more prevalent now the words
to it.
Like I said, it's a little bitmore prevalent now the words to
it, but I've been able to helpwomen already with this because
(20:11):
they don't know what's going on.
And then you explain it.
So yeah, your pain.
I'm a firm believer in thatstatement.
Your pain is your purpose.
Speaker 1 (20:19):
It becomes your purpose.
100%, so you've been throughquite a bit.
100%, so you've been throughquite a bit.
How long?
And it may still be happening,but because there's so many
things that are still unfolding.
But how long did it take you tokind of navigate your divorce
process?
Speaker 2 (20:39):
So this is a fun, I'll tell this story.
So when I was getting divorcedso this is a fun, I'll tell this
story.
So when I was getting divorced,even though I'm a very powerful
person, you know vibrant,vivacious, outgoing personality,
the problem that I had that Idid not know I had was low
self-esteem or low self-worth.
And when I was getting divorcedI met someone else that
(21:03):
basically saw a weak-mindedwoman and I got involved with
this man and I'm also sograteful and I'll explain to you
why because he was even morehorrible, because he was more of
a real crazy person, person andthere was some physical things
(21:24):
and, um, I sought different kindof help and I went to a support
group for like, almost like adomestic violence type of thing
and I never was afraid of him oranything like that, but it was
like I sought this help.
So I go to the support groupand everyone's speaking and I
speak about this now a lotbecause if you went in the
support group, let's say, therewas 12 women.
(21:45):
Six were, let's say, in poverty, maybe addicts or stuff like
that, but six of us were uppermiddle-class women, some
affluent.
So please know that if you'rein a situation where in your
domestic violence.
It doesn't.
It doesn't matter what walk oflife you are, it does happen.
(22:05):
I think some people think it'sonly in certain sects of society
, but it's everywhere, butanyway.
So I went to this support groupand I started to learn I don't
have any issues with this guy inthat respect.
I learned what my ex-husbandwas.
Well, at that time I might'vestill been married, I don't know
(22:31):
and it was like an awakeningfor me Like, oh my God, that was
me.
I felt like that with him, notthis guy.
I felt like that with him, notthis guy.
So for me that wasn't even likenavigating divorce.
It was like an awakening for meLike, wow, I was just in a very
abusive marriage withoutknowing I was in it because
there was no physical abuse.
There was mental abuse,monetarily abuse, and you don't
(22:52):
know and let me ask you what youthink about this.
I find it hard to use the wordabuse, like I've said this
publicly on my social mediabecause everyone, or at least I
think like, oh, abuse, like yougot your ass kicked.
You get your ass kicked everyday, but no, it's.
You know, mental is almostworse.
(23:13):
You know, most of the time,people who have physical, have
mental as well.
I mean pretty much.
I can probably bet a milliondollars on that, but at least
with the physical, at one pointyou could say look, what's being
done to me, look, look, I havea black and blue look.
I'm not saying I don't wishthat on anyone, but it was an
awakening for me and I went onto be manipulated by both of
(23:39):
them at the same time, if youwill.
And then, once the divorce wasover, the other stuff didn't
stop, with the kids andeverything.
So I just I think for me thatwas my, my lessons, like I
started to do moreself-introspective, I started to
look into personal development,I started to listen to things,
I started to meditate.
You just start to seek help foryourself.
Speaker 1 (24:01):
Could we pinpoint what you just said?
Because that's where I wasgoing to go next Exactly, and
you mentioned it.
Okay, and what do you want?
What you just finished sayingto me, the way I perceive it, it
seems like you took 100%responsibility.
You didn't.
(24:22):
Maybe, at some point during theprocess, you might've blamed
them for certain things, butthere was a point that you just
described right now that to meit seems like you said enough is
enough.
I'm up to here of the bullshitor the pain, or the, or myself,
(24:42):
or my, or whatever it was foryou, and I decide to take
responsibility for my life, formy thoughts, for my situation,
If we don't know that we'rebeing abused, whatever that may
entail because it's a humongousparentheses and so many things
(25:05):
fall into that.
My best advice for anyone andnot just abuse, abuse, trauma.
Maybe you're in a workplacethat you dislike whatever, maybe
you have negative thoughtsthroughout the day, maybe you
don't like the story that you'retelling yourself.
I invite you to take 100%responsibility.
(25:28):
My parents, I, was raped.
Take 100% responsibility in thenow moment, right now, right
now, and the only work we can dois the work we do on ourself.
That is the best favor we can dofor the entire world.
I'll tell you real quickly,before we keep going with your
story, when I first startedcoaching so I opened my own
(25:54):
private coaching four years ago,but I've been doing the work
for longer than that and Istarted coaching to help others.
That's what I thought in mymind and that I was doing, and
all along it was to help myself.
And that I discovered that, ofcourse, much later, because the
exact case of my clients, to theexact details they, were parts
(26:20):
of me.
Speaker 2 (26:21):
Oh yes.
Speaker 1 (26:23):
That I still needed to work on that.
I still needed to see that Ineeded to explore from their
perspective and with their help.
So it's we're so much moreconnected than we think we are.
Speaker 2 (26:40):
Oh, my God.
Speaker 1 (26:41):
Like at such an interesting level.
Speaker 2 (26:48):
But I want to touch on something.
You just said it because I Isaid this to clients and and it
really is a aha moment and ittouches on what you just said.
So you're in a situation yeah,I was, was, you know, sometimes
I still do it you're in thatlike he's doing this and he's
this and he's that, and he'sthis or she, whatever, it is
(27:10):
right.
And then I finally said tomyself and I make my clients say
it to themselves wait a minute,why am I allowing this?
So, as soon as I had that, whyam I allowing this?
Then that's when the race wason, because it's like, yeah, I
could sit there and stay in thatloop the whole time, like why
(27:31):
is he doing this, why is hedoing this?
But like, why are you there?
Then, if you don't like it, whyare you there?
And then that's what made mesay like wait a second, why am I
there?
Why am I doing this?
And then you start to questionyourself and you get to know
yourself and why you're doingthe things you're doing, because
my favorite expression, whatyou allow is what will continue.
So it's you know.
(27:52):
It's like you said, it's taking100% responsibility for what's
going on.
You're not responsible thatthat person let's say, you want
to use someone that was is aphysically abused.
You're not responsible for themmaking you hate.
You, let's say but it's up toyou to get out of it and seek
help and do whatever.
You know some people can'tleave right away.
There's all things you can do,but, yeah, it is 100%.
(28:16):
I am in the here and now.
What can I do?
Not like?
Oh, my parents didn't havemoney?
No, okay, so we all haveparents that fucked us up in
some way, shape or form.
Okay, we all did.
They might've not meant it,they might've been the best
parents on the planet, and butthey did.
If you, if you look at societyright, it's like you are where
you were raised and it could bea good bed or not.
(28:38):
But if you're not happy with it, guess whose job it is now to
improve?
Change you.
So we spoke about this.
You know when we met it's.
You know, when you have thatawareness and the accountability
, then you know all the otherthings come a lot easier.
It's not I shouldn't say easy.
It's simple, but a lot of thiswork is not easy, but you have
(29:01):
to do it.
So 100% responsibility foryourselves.
And when you take your powerback and taking your power back
is taking responsibility so ifyou take your power back because
when you're giving it away toother people, then you're
powerless.
So when you actually I say thisall the time if you're blaming
(29:23):
someone, you're actuallypowerless it's actually giving
your power away.
So taking responsibility isactually powerful.
It's the opposite of whatpeople think, like I take
responsibility, so that meansthat it's not their fault,
whatever.
No, you take responsibility ispowerful because now you're in
power, I can do something aboutthis.
Speaker 1 (29:44):
Yeah, when I was connecting with my guides, they
mentioned responsibility as ourresponse and ability, and then
they broke it into two and theysaid it's our ability to respond
respond to what happens to us.
I very much resonate with whatyou're sharing and with your
(30:12):
journey, because you've hadcourage takes a lot of courage
to look within, to look at ourwounds, to lick our own wounds,
to sew yourself back together,to seek for help.
So you went through all thesethings.
(30:32):
You lost your sister, you had arough childhood X, y, z,
whatever you know.
You lost your sister.
You went through a verydifficult divorce.
Yes, and how did you?
How did it look like?
Getting to the light at the endof the tunnel?
(30:54):
Like you started personaldevelopment and you met a mentor
, you met a friend thatintroduced you, you read a book
that changed your life and youwant to recommit.
How does that like okay,there's a way out at least.
Right, something at the end ofthe tunnel?
Like how did that littleroadmap kind of look like for
(31:14):
you?
Speaker 2 (31:16):
You know you're on that road without knowing you're
on that road once you wake upto it.
But for me, I can'tspecifically think of anything
at the moment of like exact, Ido remember looking at believe
it or not how to do with my kidsand like how to be a better
parent, like with thecommunication and stuff and just
parenting, which I candefinitely help people nowadays
(31:37):
with that, because there's notmany parents out there that want
to be parents, but that's awhole nother podcast.
But I think it was just likelearning, like being open to
learning and how to be improvemyself.
And Abraham Hicks I don't knowif you're familiar with like
let's sort of listen to AbrahamHicks and meditations and a lot
(31:57):
of I am affirmations and that'swhy I am grateful for everything
, cause when I felt so alone,cause I really didn't have
anybody, who do you have?
You have yourself right and youjust start to gain confidence
and get to know who you are andlove yourself or like yourself.
And as you like yourself, youstart to do more things for
(32:18):
yourself and look into thingsand actually, look, I'm a
research queen, so I wasprobably researching and looking
at things and I'll researcheverything and that's probably
how I found it was by research alot of it, and I have a good
friend that recommended AbrahamHicks.
But I think it's just that selfdiscovery, personal development,
how can it, without saying toyourself like, how can I improve
(32:40):
myself?
You're just on this journey and, if you want to say, your
guides or the universe juststarted to kind of push me that
way and I I'm still on that road.
You know you're always learning, we're always becoming more and
more enlightened.
You know you don't becomeenlightened and then that's it.
You just keep going and goingand growing and, like I say, my
(33:02):
glow, like I was always taughtto be small and not be that
shining light that you are.
So then, once I started to bethis shining light and be
comfortable with it and I'mstill sometimes have issues, you
know because but you thenbecome confident and you know if
you want to use, let's say,abuse as an example, you know
that you will never, ever put upwith that again, ever, ever.
(33:26):
And for me, you know I like totell clients in the divorce sect
is that for me and I have avery different personality, so
you can't.
You know there are people thatmight not be able to do this,
but I literally did everythingby myself.
I had another boyfriend afterthat.
I was a very nice guy, whateverit didn't work out and I
started to do everything bymyself.
I'd go to concerts and I'd goto here and I had the best
(33:48):
fucking time.
I'm a lot of fun, and so youknow and I just started to if
you want to use that term, dateyourself, and I started to use
this analogy of that you want tobecome, and I don't even think
you need to go through divorcefor this.
I think everyone needs to dothis in their lifetime, even as
young adults going intoadulthood, you become an Island
and you are your Island andeverything you need is on that
(34:10):
Island your love, yourvalidation, your food, your
water, everything that issustaining for you.
You don't need anything fromanywhere else, and once you're
comfortable being on that islandand you have everything you
need within yourself, then maybeyou want to invite people on
that island to share your lifewith you, because we are
conditioned in society, in myopinion, to look outward for our
(34:32):
love, for our validation, foreverything is outward.
Even our connection to whateveryou want to call it is outward.
Go to this building, go, dothis, do this, and I don't even
want to get into that subject,but you know what I mean.
We're taught to go outward,like, look outside of yourself
is where it all is, and guesswhat?
No, everything is here.
The power that creates worldsis right here in front of you.
(34:55):
When you look in that mirror,you are the most powerful person
.
And I even have a hard timesometimes saying like to myself.
You know I'm very hard onmyself.
And another thing I want yourlisteners to know that we're in
this space and we may be here,but we still have the same
issues, it's they still creep in.
We're not these perfect beings.
You know I'm I'm been very notnice to myself lately, verbally,
(35:19):
you know verbally, and I amvery aware of that lately, you
know, like yo, you gotta likewatch your I ams.
You know I call it the I.
You know I am what I am two ofthe most powerful words you can
say, because what comes afterthat is your truth.
So if you're listening, we'renot perfect, but we just we'll
catch it quicker.
(35:39):
But yeah, that's that's.
You know, it's all about beingopen and aware and willing to do
the, do the hard work, and alot of times it's the feelings.
It's the feelings that don'tfeel good, but when you push
through them, you get to theother side.
Speaker 1 (36:01):
Thank you so much for sharing that.
I feel like a lot of people aregoing to resonate with what
you're sharing and I will touchon something personal, um that
I'm going through, um, so peoplecan feel heard and seen and
identified with because, likeyou mentioned, there's no
(36:24):
exception.
I'm no exception to any rule Um, just living this human
experience like everybody else,jumping the obstacles and
learning different tools thathelp me.
Right now I'm working with acoach.
By the way, I invite coaches tohave coaches.
We also need another reflectionto reflect back to us, or
(36:51):
another perspective of certainthings we can't see.
Just because we've been doingit long enough doesn't mean that
we don't benefit from being astudent in this type of work.
So I've been working a lot withfinding a different type of
balance between my feminine andmasculine For so long.
(37:14):
For many years I operated 90%masculine and 10% feminine and
that worked for a while and Iachieved a lot of success and I
did a lot of things with thatand I'm grateful.
But there was a point in mylife especially after certain
health issues, um, where Iwanted I, I craved my femininity
(37:37):
and I wanted to embody thatmore and I just had no clue how
to do that.
I, I, that was not myconditioning, um.
So I've been transitioning thatand being aware of how I talk
to myself, how I cultivate mygarden within me in all aspects
(37:59):
right, whether it's spirituality, relationship, finances, all of
it inside.
That doesn't depend on outsideapproval from social media, from
your partner, from whateverright.
So one of the things I have beendoing to cultivate that has
been painting.
Painting puts me in a placewhere I feel free.
(38:21):
I feel very connected to myfeminine, to my goddess creative
side.
I feel connected to God.
I feel connected to God.
So just explore differentthings, different avenues.
Maybe it's dancing, maybe it'sbreath work, maybe it's plant
medicine, whatever.
Maybe it's a walk in nature,trekking or biking, but just
(38:44):
explore your relationship withyourself.
I feel like one of the biggestrelationships and the soulmate.
One of the soulmates that we'relooking for is ourselves, like
(39:06):
our connection to our higherself, or what our soul really
wants to do, how it feels joy,how it finds joy in this life,
how it thrives.
And then from that place it'ssuch a powerful place because
it's your roots.
If your foundation is made inthe sand and it hasn't taken
root, any obstacle that comesalong is just going to sweep you
away.
It's just, it's not, it's notgoing to take.
(39:27):
So working in ourself-reflection and our
relationship with ourselves hasbeen one of the most helpful
things I've ever done for myself.
Speaker 2 (39:40):
I agree, and it's an ongoing process.
It's not like going to schoolfor X amount of time and then
you're done.
It's literally constant.
It's a daily activity.
Daily activity, you know it'san activity.
Speaker 1 (39:54):
What are, what are, some of your daily activities
that you like to do?
Speaker 2 (39:57):
okay, so I start my day with um, I just started.
I always journal, but now I'mdoing a brain dump first.
So I I start with, you know,journaling, uh, and then I do
gratitude and I kind of saywhat's on my mind, because I
used to not do that.
I used to think my journalshould just be grateful and
everything's gratitude, and thenthe rest would be in my head
(40:20):
and it wouldn't stay therebecause I'll tell you about my
next step.
But I now like write somethings, you know so journal, get
it all out and then do thegratitude and then I do a
stretch meditation.
I'll stretch for about I don'tknow anywhere 20 minutes or so
with type of like affirmationsor something type of meditation.
And I love I personally lovegoing on YouTube and like I have
(40:41):
my favorites or just Googlesomething that's bothering me,
and I'll be like you know,meditation for whatever X, y, z,
and then I do a full and thenI'll do whatever time I have
left I'll devote to a regularquote, regular meditation,
either a visualization or juststillness, quiet, and that is a
non-negotiable for me.
(41:02):
I do that every day and for me,even if I feel like it's not
doing anything, it's definitelydoing an immense amount, and I'm
sure you know about meditationand the benefits and that is one
of the most simplest ways tohelp yourself.
And you know it's not only justsitting crisscross applesauce
(41:23):
on the.
You know I say this and forgotif I said it on one of my posts.
It's not about wearing, youknow, lululemons and
Birkenstocks and, you know,eating granola.
You know it's not anything likethat.
It's about just quieting yourmind.
And if you can't do that,that's fine.
Maybe have a guided meditationand taking that time out to
connect to you and you.
You know the power of the worldbecause we're so, especially
(41:46):
nowadays, we're so filled withelectronics and this and school
and kids, blah, blah, blah.
And then you can't hear yourhigher being, you can't hear
your inner being.
You can't hear it if it'scluttered.
So it helps you be able to hear, okay, and then those are the
two things that I swear by, andthen obviously, there's other
(42:11):
things throughout the day that Ido.
Speaker 1 (42:13):
Thank you for sharing that.
I wanted to.
I concur with that a hundredpercent and I invite people to
play around with it until youfind a routine that you like
that feels good for you.
I want to touch on exercisebecause to me, exercise is way
more than that is is related tomental health, is related to
(42:37):
coping, it's related, it'srelated to everything, um, and
nutrition as well, and there's alot of misinformation um out
there, unfortunately, um, our,our food has been tampered with
our mental health, includingthat, both diagnosis and
medication, for, just to call itsomething, the big pharma or
(43:02):
you know, just um, whatever anyother agenda but, um, the
wellbeing of humanity as a whole, but the wellbeing of humanity
as a whole.
So I feel like, again, we goback to taking responsibility as
an individual.
What can we do?
And in this case, I would likefor you to speak about what your
(43:26):
road with staying healthy, withexercise, with nutrition, has
been, because that's such a keypart.
That's something I strugglewith and maybe one-on-one you
and I can work through that,because I have been going
through that.
You know, with my hormones,with age, everything changes.
It's harder to lose the weightLike.
I was always 103, 113 at themost.
(43:49):
In the past, say, four years,I've had not been able to lose
the weight, um, and I've done somuch Um, so it's definitely,
you know, um, a challenge thatis here to be transcended,
worked with, understood and um,which I appreciate because I've
(44:09):
been able to look at nutrients,at food, at the microbiome, at
gut health, the gut brain axis,and just so many things that if
I had not gone through that,maybe I had never stopped to
look at it.
So what has been your personaljourney with the weight, with
menopause, with the healthaspect of that?
Speaker 2 (44:30):
Well, like I touched on before, I was like a heavy
kid and then when I got towhatever age I was 15, I lost
weight and got in shape.
I was always athletic and I gota lot of attention for that.
So move forward and I'mskipping over years, but I
became a professional figureathlete.
You're like a, a bodybuilder,but it's not bodybuilding, it's
(44:51):
more like feminine, and so ofcourse I know about exercise and
nutrition to get into that kindof shape and it is a very big
part of my day.
I didn't bring that up, I wasonly going for, like, the
spiritual and mental health.
But like I, I have to train.
Like it's something in betterthan me.
I have to.
There are days I don't want to,but it's just part.
So I definitely train.
(45:12):
I do weight training and, youknow, um, elliptical.
Now I have some back problems,you know, can't really jog, but
like that is definitely part ofa very important part of my day.
And sometimes I have to remindmyself why.
Because you know, are you doingit for vanity reasons or you're
doing for health reasons andbringing up the menopause, which
we both discussed?
(45:32):
So I always keep going to thegym because it's so healthy for
you, right, but it getsfrustrating when you feel like
it's not doing anything.
I mean it is per se, but youknow I tend to get overwhelmed
when you start to get into thehealthy and the stuff about food
and everything.
And I just try and be ashealthy as I can and not really
(45:52):
think too much about it if I'mnot buying organic chicken that
day or whatever.
But I try and eat clean, whichmeans like trying to eat junk
and all that crap and try andmaintain weight and so menopause
I mean I feel like I'm insomeone else's body.
That's what I feel like,especially coming from my
background.
That was my occupation, I knewwhat to do.
(46:16):
So now that you know what to doand it's not working, it's quite
frustrating.
So I also feel like it's a whatwas the word?
You said?
Oh, challenge.
Okay, I feel like it's achallenge and it's also a way
for me to say like, okay, whatif you stayed the way you were
and you're not going to belooked at anymore for your
(46:39):
definition Cause I'm certainlynot defined right now Like your
definition and for being inshape.
I mean, people see me, theyknow you're in shape, but I'm
talking about, like, what I'mused to.
What if that's not what youridentity is anymore?
Speaker 1 (46:52):
Can we pause?
Yeah, guys, going throughidentity crisis and what we base
, who we are, and our value andattention and love.
Ultimately, it comes down to asa humanity and I include myself
(47:14):
very much in this one of thebig woundings is self-worth.
Speaker 2 (47:19):
Absolutely.
Speaker 1 (47:20):
As a humanity, as a collective, the collective,
unconscious.
It is completely wounded withthe unworthiness that is
something at the deepest levelabuse, abandonment, all of it,
and I've worked with so manyclients Abandonment, all of it,
(47:42):
and I've worked with so manyclients.
We go to what's underneath thatand it comes down to self-worth
.
Oh yeah, so it's important tofind that inner garden and
cultivate it, regardless ofwhat's going on outside.
Absolutely garden and cultivateit regardless of what's going on
outside, regardless of yourprofession, regardless of your
(48:10):
looks, regardless of who youthink you are.
So when I do breathwork and Ilead people, one of the things
the introductory I use a lot ofhealing Icaros, which are songs
from the Amazon and things likethat, and there's a space that
we get to where everybody's kindof like the walls are down and
you're a little bit more relaxed.
I say, okay, so start imagininglike you're taking off all of
(48:31):
the layers that define you yourprofession, being a mother,
being a daughter, being a human,your name, right.
Then they eventually get to bethis little ball of light, like
a second sun, right.
So from there, from beingenergy, from being love, from
your true essence, reallynothing outside of you can
(48:53):
really do anything.
It's just an experience to belived, to be felt, to be
transformed to all of thosethings.
And thank you for being honestand vulnerable while being a
coach, because I feel being aleader, being a coach, being a
conscious leader, that couldalso be a trap for us.
(49:20):
Being this perfect white light,love being there's a lot more
than that in in this work,absolutely so it takes guts to
stand here and say again I, youknow, uh, you know we're going
through identity cases and lifeand death and rebirth, and
(49:42):
that's the real shit that'shappening.
Yeah, we do nothing by comingon here and say, oh perfect,
come, come, come, do a sessionwith me.
That's not going to helpanybody.
You know we're working throughthis shit together.
Okay, maybe somebody that's 80can come and talk to you and be
like, oh honey, that's nothing,I've been through that or
(50:04):
whatever they're like you know.
Um, but maybe somebody like methat's kind of dipping their
toes in that and you're ahead ofthe curve, then we can work
together and then you can guideme and be like all right, I got
you.
You know, let me, let me walkyou through this.
So thank you for being open andtrue and I feel that
(50:26):
authenticity If you guys arewatching the video and not just
listening.
Speaker 2 (50:33):
She's the real deal, I am the real deal, I am the
real deal.
Speaker 1 (50:35):
I like that.
Speaker 2 (50:36):
And I'm glad that you brought that up, because I did
a I think it was a social mediapost and since we're speaking
about menopause the whole entiretime here, I feel like I
haven't said what I wanted tosay because I have menopause
brain, so, like excuse, I mean,my brain feels like it's it's.
It's a horrible feeling.
But what I wanted to say isthat I actually even made a post
(50:57):
of that, something to theeffect of when I'm speaking to
you, meeting social media, I'mreally talking to myself as a
reminder when I'm helping you.
I might not even need it, butit reminds me.
It reminds me of where I camefrom.
It reminds me of how much I'vegrown.
(51:17):
It reminds me of how powerful Iam and how worthy and deserving
I am and you are and everyoneis.
And it reminds me of not to belike.
You know.
I have a very bad habit rightnow, speaking of menopause is I.
The second I wake up, I look inthe mirror and I'm just like,
(51:39):
like, and just today in general,like, why are you starting your
day like that, with looking atyourself and saying that you
know what?
You don't look like?
You did and maybe you willagain.
I'm very confident in that.
But, like, stop looking atfirst of all what you look like
anyway and how you're going tostart your day and just look
within.
(51:59):
You know, in one of my rooms Igo, I stretch in one room but I
lay down and do meditation inanother room because there's a
bed in there and there's amirror in there and I just
pretty new about a week, a weekand a half, maybe two weeks I've
literally talked to myself inthe mirror as if I'm the little
girl or as if I am looking atmyself as is, as like someone
else.
And what would you, what wouldyou say to yourself?
(52:20):
Am looking at myself as is, aslike someone else, and what
would what would you say toyourself?
I did a post today somethinglike I would never speak to my
children or my husband the way Ispeak to myself sometimes.
So I got to check that like Ihave to speak to myself the same
way I would speak to someone Ilove with all my heart.
So you know, we're definitelynot perfect beings.
Even though we could guide youto a higher place or guide you
(52:44):
to where you want to be, doesn'tmean that we are perfect.
Speaker 1 (52:49):
Yeah, and another thing I want to point out is in
regards to when it comes tocoaching, like for me, my, the
coaching session I had with my,with one of my coaches it's
nothing new.
We're not telling you.
Essentially, if you're reallyreally in the, in the core of
your being, you already know.
Yes, we are just reflectingback to you maybe a different
(53:15):
angle or maybe something thateven triggers you, because one
of the things she said to me oh,this is a possibility, and my
answer to her and I noticed howdefensive it was I said
absolutely not.
And I was like and I caughtmyself and I'm like so
(53:38):
interesting that I answered inthat way and that I felt
triggered by what you said to me.
So thank you for bringing it up.
So, yeah, it's constant work.
Speaker 2 (53:49):
The very thing, and I said this conversation with my
husband before I got on here andit wasn't.
It was kind of like that.
I actually said, like you know,we need, we, we all need to ask
ourselves sometimes why youanswer in certain ways, because
it usually has nothing to dowith the person.
It's, yeah, what's going on inyou.
(54:11):
You know what I mean and it'snot.
It's not fun to hear that, youknow, when you're not in a mood
to hear it.
So a lot of times you getdefensive or whatever.
Like I said, we're all humanand you know, sometimes you go
back to that knee jerk reactionto things or things that you
didn't uncover yet or not fullyor fully healed from, or
whatever it may be.
(54:31):
You know, so it's.
You know.
My whole thing with people iswhat I've learned is I want to
awaken and inspire people, butyou also can't do that to anyone
that's not ready for it orwilling.
Speaker 1 (54:45):
Thank you for also pointing that out.
Tell me a little bit about howyou help people now.
Um, cause I know you've had atransition, um, pretty much.
Um, how does it look like like?
What type of services do youoffer?
How does how does that looklike, Cause I know you're very
(55:06):
multifaceted, Um, so tell us alittle bit about that.
Speaker 2 (55:12):
So, like I said, I'm like at the core personal
development coach, if you will,and help people create a life
they fucking love, with mindsetshifts, reclaiming their power,
finding happiness and innerpeace within themselves.
And I specialize, or I have aspecialty, in the women who are
either going through divorce orin a toxic relationship or just
(55:34):
the low self-esteem like, allthat confidence, whatever.
So, for right now, I have myown podcast, which I love
because that's personaldevelopment all over the place.
It's called the Elise MorganExperience Podcast.
I have my Instagram page andI'm working on a book is coming
out, and how you can work withme is I have a few things up in
(55:57):
the air.
So I'm having, locally inFlorida, going to be setting up
a like a one day retreat forthese women to so they can teach
them some ways to get eitherthrough it or past it.
And also, you know, coaching.
You know so one-on-one coachingis, you know, always great
People.
People love being coachedthemselves and also having, you
(56:20):
know that one-on-one attentionand also group coaching.
So, like, I have a whole arrayof how you can work with me, so
I urge you to get in touch withme.
You know, free discovery call,it's just no strings attached,
just want to hear your story,see if I can help you and help
you right on the phone, right onthe discovery call.
(56:41):
You know you'll get.
You'll get something you needon that call, whether we work
together or not, because that'swhat I'm here for.
I'm here to serve you, I'm hereto help you.
So whether you continue with meis up to you, but you will get
something on the call.
Speaker 1 (56:54):
So that's beautiful.
Thank you so much.
We're going to put all of theinformation in the description
so they can reach out.
It could be easy and they'llknow how to find you.
Is there any last messages youwant to leave the listeners with
or any last messages in generalyou want to share?
Speaker 2 (57:14):
I see you, I know you and I love you, and you are
worthy and deserving of a lifeyou absolutely love.
Speaker 1 (57:31):
Wow, well, I needed to hear that at least.
So thank you.
Speaker 2 (57:40):
I actually got tears in my eyes saying that, because
I think I was saying it tomyself.
So thank you for having me.
Speaker 1 (57:44):
Thank you, Elise.
The honor is all mine.
Thank you.
Speaker 2 (57:48):
Thank you so much.
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