April 26, 2023 • 47 mins
This week I chat with Amber of Glacier Weddings and Events who is passionate about running a business that is both eco-conscious AND inclusive to ALL people. We discuss everything from how sustainability and diversity intersect to her tips for any couples listening thinking about planning an elopement or wedding! Enjoy!
The intro and all instrumentals were written, sung and recorded by @JaynaDavisMusic
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Transcript
Episode Transcript
Available transcripts are automatically generated. Complete accuracy is not guaranteed.
(00:00):
All right, clearly beloved,welcome to this week's episode.
I'm super excited to have Amberof Glacier weddings and events
here with me today, and I thinkyou are all gonna really wanna
listen in to this episode.
So Amber, if you could introduceyourself, your pronouns, or any
other identities that areimportant to.
(00:21):
Sure.
Yeah.
Uh, my name's Amber Jackson.
I'm like you said, owner ofGlacier Weddings and Events.
Um, she, her pronouns, otheridentifying factors.
I'm a cat lcut, a stepmom, andlove a good margarita.
Yes.
We'll go with That's the wholeidentity.
The whole margarita.
Yep.
(00:41):
Yes.
Oh, that's great.
Um, yeah.
Can you tell us a little bitabout.
Will, you just told us a littlebit about yourself, which I
appreciate, but Yeah.
About your business.
Yeah.
What you do, how you gotstarted.
Yeah, so I actually, I went tocollege.
I have a bachelor's of fine artsin all things dance.
(01:04):
Um, so if you wanted to go downthat dance history tangent, I
could totally do that if youwanted.
Um, but basically moved toSeattle, um, cuz it was a big
city that wasn't, you know, LAor New York, that I thought
theoretically I could afford.
I'm not being super affordable.
And then, um, but tried to be aprofessional dancer for a really
long time and the job that kindof fit the best with that was
(01:25):
catering.
So I sort of clawed my way upthrough catering, um, and found
that I kind of really lovedevents, um, and especially
weddings.
Um, worked for, you know, acouple other wedding planners.
At this point.
I've done cut a hundred events,um, and then started my business
two years.
So just kind of getting started,um, my main focus with the
(01:47):
business is to push peopletowards more eco-conscious
choices.
Um, I know that no one's gonnabe able to make a perfect
decision.
Like there are no perfect zero,a thousand percent, zero waste
weddings out there.
Um, but trying to kind of pushpeople towards a smarter choice
and really considering theethics as well as like, you
(02:07):
know, the packaging and all ofthose elements of, of
sustainability that goes intoan.
Once you start seeing, you know,giant tears of cake thrown in
the garbage, it's hard to not belike, oh, let's maybe not do
that.
Oh my gosh.
Yeah.
You see, you see a lot atweddings.
Mm-hmm.
You're kind of just like, oh,I'm gonna just, just fly a
(02:28):
little bit inside.
Yeah.
Yeah.
And I, I was actually justthinking about that before we
hopped on, is any of.
Like related to your name or howdid you pick your name?
So my husband actually picked myname.
Okay.
Um, he had just gotten back fromGlacier National Park, like
(02:48):
right before I was starting mybusiness and I was struggling to
find a name.
I didn't wanna go with the,like, you know, this and this
name.
There's a lot of like, you know,evergreen and Ivy and Pearl and
something and names out there.
And I wanted to do somethingthat, Environmental without
feeling super on the nose.
(03:09):
So he's like, yeah, just gotback from Glacier National Park.
What about Glacier?
I'm like, well, that makessense.
That's great.
Have you been there?
I haven't.
I wanna go so bad.
I feel like you could do like awhole like brand shoot there.
Oh, I know.
It's like my, there's these icecaves in Washington that I've
(03:29):
been dying to do a style shootin forever, but they're like a
little bit dangerous to go in.
Got it.
Yeah.
So you have to like hit the likeperfect time of the season and
then if you do that, it's alittle chilly out.
Oh yeah.
That makes sense.
Yep.
You're like, actually I just ownthese glaciers.
This is just, yeah, these arejust actually, so do you ever
(03:52):
wanna go out with me in themiddle of winter?
Let's do it.
I mean, I'm from Minnesota, so Ican We'll be fine.
Handle it.
Yeah.
Yeah.
And you're from Minnesota too,right?
Yeah, I grew up in Farmington,so it's a small town just
outside the cities.
That is where I went to highschool.
No way.
(04:12):
Oh my gosh.
What year did you graduate?
So I actually didn't go toFarmington High School.
Mm-hmm.
I went to the school rightacross the street, the little
private school.
Well, like we could literallysee Farmington High School right
across the road, huh?
Yeah.
I don't know if you, smallworld.
Yeah.
That's so crazy.
(04:33):
Oh my gosh.
Um, yeah, I went to college inMankato.
Okay.
Yeah.
Very cool.
And then after, after that,that's when you moved out to
Seattle?
Yeah.
Okay.
Wow.
I love it.
Yeah.
And I love that now you havethat perspective of like being
in the Midwest.
Mm-hmm.
(04:53):
And, and then also being out inthe per Pacific Northwest.
Mm-hmm.
Um, Which I will have a questionon later, but just to kind of
give people more context, um, Ido see that a lot of your
passion is about ecoconsciousness mm-hmm.
And sustainability, um, as awedding and enrollment planner.
(05:14):
So what does that mean and whatdoes it mean to you personally?
So for me personally, a lot ofit is about.
There's this, there's thisYouTuber that talks about eco
minimalism as opposed to likeeco perfectionism, so mm-hmm.
It, it's more about buying less,buying secondhand, using less
(05:40):
disposing of things properly.
That, that's kind of where mymindset goes more towards,
because I mean, Unfortunately,there's only a whole lot that
you can do as an individual.
So a lot of it is advocating forthe change that you want to see.
Um, so, but that's personallykind of my perspective on it and
the way I implement that, eh,uh, the way I implement that
(06:06):
into my business is really bypushing clients to just make
better choices.
Not everyone can have anelopement.
You know, there's families,there's cultural things that
other people are gonna have tokind of work through in a
wedding.
And as we all know, there's alot of emotions tied to
weddings.
(06:27):
You know, a lot of moms thathave been dreaming about their
daughter's wedding for a reallylong time.
So helping them kind of.
Their ethics as well as all theother circumstances around their
weddings and trying to makebetter choices.
Like you don't have to have aperfectly vegan wedding to have
an eco wedding.
Mm-hmm.
Would I love it if you did as avegan myself, right?
(06:49):
Yeah.
Right.
That feels so, that feels.
Exactly like the right approachbecause it's like if you fall
too much on the side of this ishow things have to do, be done.
Mm-hmm.
Then people are just gonna feelnervous about messing up or
Right.
You know, anxious as opposed tofeeling like motivated or
inspired Yeah.
(07:10):
To do something.
Yeah.
I try to keep it prettyrealistic.
For, you know, what you canactually accomplish.
I have, I have, I've done, youknow, massive 400 person
weddings, which in and ofthemselves are very much not
sustainable, but you know, theyalways rent everything.
They'll get everythingsecondhand to core wise.
(07:31):
We donate their flowers at theend of the night.
Like we try to do all thesethings for them so that they can
still feel like they made a moreethical decision at the end of
the.
Yeah.
Yeah.
And so I guess you even justkind of touched on it, but how,
like what kinds of principlesshow up in your business as far
(07:51):
as eco consciousness?
So the main principles arebuying less.
Buying secondhand first anddisposing of it properly.
Those are like my, my three bigthings.
Um, the one I think getsforgotten the most is disposing
properly.
Hmm.
What's nice about the PacificNorthwest Northwest is it is,
(08:12):
There's, their setup is just alittle bit easier to work with,
um, versus, you know, movingback to the Midwest, I'm like,
oh, I don't even have a greenbeam like that.
I just don't automatically get agreen bin.
Um, so you definitely have to doa little bit more research, but
it's totally doable.
Um, I have, you know, aneighborhood compost that I just
drop on my compost off everyweek.
Um, so I, I think it, it can befor sure doable, no matter where
(08:35):
you're.
Yeah, that was actually thequestion I was gonna ask you
earlier is how, now that you'vekind of seen both sides mm-hmm.
The Midwest versus PacificNorthwest, how do you see that
showing up differently?
Like, how are they differentfrom each other?
Yeah.
Um, especially when it comes toelopement, it's just so much
more common in the PacificNorthwest to be able to do that.
(08:58):
Um, so it's, it's less.
If you talk to a weddingplanner, they're gonna, they're
gonna question it a little bitless of like, oh, you want Alop
open a mountaintop, great.
Versus out here, they're like,wait, you wanna do what?
You sure you don't wanna likefly to the mid Midwest or the
Pacific Northwest or Colorado orsomething to do that?
And it's like, well, there'slots of places you can do it
here too.
(09:19):
The bad lands are beautiful.
Yes.
Know you recently postedsomething on your Instagram with
a bunch of different places.
Yeah.
Um, I.
I've always wanted do a weddingup in International Falls.
Mm-hmm.
Or, um, even mini Haha Falls hassome really great spots and
that's, you know, dead in themiddle of the city.
Yep.
Yeah, yeah.
(09:40):
No, I fully agree.
I'm, I'm really trying toconvince people that there's
hidden gems in the Midwest andthat Yeah.
We can sometimes be teeth alittle cheaper too.
Oh, it's significantly cheaper,I'll tell you that.
Especially with that planeticket.
Right.
Yeah.
How would you say though, interms of, and, and again, like
(10:02):
we want this to feel inclusiveto everybody, but like if you
were talking to a couple inSouth Dakota, for example
mm-hmm.
And like trying to be like,yeah, we're gonna be sustainable
and stuff.
Do they generally receive itdifferently than someone living
out in Washington or.
I, I've gotten a wide variety inboth locations, honestly.
(10:28):
I think because my approach isnot like you have to do X, Y,
and Z number of things.
People are a little bit morecomfortable with it.
Mm-hmm.
Um, because then they're able tokind of make decisions within
what makes sense for them, asopposed to if I was like, no,
you have to have a vegan menu.
You have to compost everythingat the end of the night.
You cannot purchase a singleitem.
(10:50):
You have to rent or buysecondhand everything.
Then I think I'd probably have alittle bit more push.
Um, but that's, that's why Ikind of go for that more
realistic approach of like, whatwe can accomplish together as
opposed to what I'm putting ontoyou to accomplish.
Sure.
I definitely get a little more,I get more questions in the, in
(11:14):
the Midwest than I did in thePacific Northwest.
Yeah.
Yeah, I could see that.
I think sometimes, cuz I've donea handful of weddings, um, like
in the Dakotas as well, and it'sjust like, you know, it can be a
different vibe of like, okay,there's a whole, there's a whole
bin just full of beer cans.
Okay, great.
(11:38):
Yeah.
Yeah.
And like a, a lot of what I'venoticed is, especially in the
Dakotas, is it, it's like theimmediate ideas to go to a
ballroom, like go to a hotelballroom, go to a hotel
ballroom, and that's where mostof the weddings take place.
And it's like, well, there'sother options, right?
Yeah.
Yeah.
But cutall, it sounds likeyou're saying the, the idea kind
(12:01):
of is, It can be for anyone.
Like the way you present it isthat it doesn't matter where you
live or like mm-hmm.
Like it's accessible for you todo and I'll show you how to do
it kind of thing.
Yeah, exactly.
That's great.
I love that.
We need more of that.
(12:23):
Yeah.
So kind of on that same note ofeco consciousness and also
trying.
You know, be welcoming.
Mm-hmm.
How do you kind of see thatintersection between eco
consciousness and beinginclusive in your business?
I mean, in general they're the,the eco-conscious bride out
(12:48):
there, or, or, or groom orwhoever, um, that's gonna book
me is generally gonna lean morein a certain direction,
politically speaking, so tospeak.
So that in and of itself islike, that's probably where my
client meshes in with, um, beinginclusive.
But I also, I'm pretty vocalabout it.
(13:09):
I'm, I'm definitely not shyabout like, Hey, this is for
everybody.
I don't care what gender youare.
I don't care what your situationis.
I don't care if there's twopeople or maybe three or maybe
four, like especially having,you know, lived in the Pacific
Northwest for a long time.
That's, that's just stuff yousee, like, it's just sort of,
Normal.
Um, and it's something I'vedefinitely had to kind of push
(13:31):
back on a little bit, being backhere of like, no, it's actually
just fine.
You can just love whoever youwanna love them.
Um, but I, I wear a pronoun pinto all my weddings.
I feel like that's a really, um,like, easy way to do.
I actually have it right here.
Yes, we love it.
My little yellow pin.
Oh, so cute.
(13:52):
Yes, everybody go by one ofthese.
It's super great.
Well, and and for me, what Itell my clients is, you know, if
you are not comfortable with mewearing it, I'm totally fine to
not wear it.
If, if that's something that youdon't wanna like open up a can
of worms and out somebody onaccident or something like that,
but I'd rather have like thatconversation with, you know,
uncle Jerry or whoever with methan with the person we're.
(14:15):
Protect at that point.
Like, I'm not trying to outanybody.
I don't wanna like open upconversations that we're not
comfortable having on a weddingday, but I'd rather, if you're
gonna get upset about something,be upset at me, not at them.
Hmm.
Yeah.
That's really great.
And you're just, you're kind ofsignaling to people like it's
okay.
Yeah.
You're even just like having it.
(14:38):
In your like email signatureline of like, I, I've just
recently booked, um, a lesbiancouple and they're like, we
booked you because we saw that.
Hmm.
Because we like, justimmediately that signal's like,
okay, we're good.
Yep.
Like, you care and you're readyto hear them out and Yeah.
Yeah.
That's great.
Yeah.
Yeah.
I'm gonna put some like links inthe show notes for some pronoun
(15:00):
pins cuz Yeah, it's a supergreat way to, and it's so easy,
like it's such a simple thingthat like makes such a great
impact that you don't realizeuntil, like I had a non-binary
bridesmaid.
They decided they wanted to becalled a bridesmaid on a
groomsman.
Um, that.
(15:20):
We wore a pronoun pin on theirbest friend's wedding day, and
there was a lot of familymembers that were really
uncomfortable with it.
Mm-hmm.
And they wore it to therehearsal and I asked them, I
was like, would would you bemore comfortable if I also wore
a pronoun pin?
And so that was the first day Iended up wearing one.
And to then have them come up tome the other night, like almost
in tears saying that they wereso appreciative of it, that they
(15:43):
felt so much more safe.
Like they could come to somebodyif they needed to.
That sold it for me.
I've never done a weddingwithout one sense, cuz I was
like, oh yeah.
I'm like, oh, I'm gonna cry.
Just thinking about that.
I know.
It's so great.
Yeah.
All right people, hopefully thatsold you.
Yeah.
That's just wear a pronoun pin.
(16:04):
It's very simple.
Right.
Yeah.
And I think on that note, um, Imean that's kind of what I
touched on in, in the Loom eventis that it doesn't always seem
like necessarily an obvious likeconnection, your
intersectionality, but it's kindof like, You know, how we treat
(16:26):
the environment, how we'reimpacting the environment,
always has intersections andlike we're just trying to make
the world a better place.
You know, so I think, well, theenvironment very intensely
affects people and mm-hmm.
We want people to feelcomfortable and we also want
the, the planet to becomfortable.
(16:47):
Yeah.
So it very much Yeah.
Makes sense together.
Yeah.
Yeah.
I love that.
I love that so much.
Wow, you're so cool.
Um, awesome.
Yeah.
Now that we've heard a littlebit about you and like your
passion and everything, um, I'dlove to pick your brain a little
bit about like the planning sideof things since Yeah.
(17:10):
That's what you do.
So if, um, the couples here thatare listening, what would you
kind of say?
As they're planning theirwedding, their elopement, what
do you usually tell people tostart at?
Start wise, especially for anelopement, the biggest thing is
gonna be a location.
(17:31):
Mm-hmm.
Do you wanna stay in your area?
Do you wanna go somewhere else?
Um, I can talk a little bitabout my kind of wedding story.
So I got married eight yearsago, almost nine.
Congrats.
Thank you.
Um, and I actually had threeweddings.
Whoa.
Okay.
Yeah.
We gotta hear.
So I had no intentions of havinga wedding when I got engaged, my
(17:57):
husband and I were pretty youngat the time.
We didn't have the finances forit.
We're like, we just wanna getmarried.
Especially, I mean, I, I do havea stepdaughter, so sometimes
it's just a little bit easierlegally speaking, if something
were to happen.
We'd be, we'd be protected thatway.
Um, so we decided to getmarried, but we didn't wanna
have a wedding.
And then my mother and mymother-in-law went behind our
(18:20):
backs and we're like, well, whatif we just planned a wedding for
you?
Oh, God.
So they, my, my mother-in-lawlives in Costa Rica.
My in-laws ex paid out there.
10 years ago or so.
So they're like, well, what ifwe just have a big family
wedding, like a big familyvacation in Costa Rica and you
(18:42):
just happened to get married?
And I was like, I couldn't dothat.
Sounds fun.
So technically my first weddingwas that we couldn't legally
sign the paperwork in CostaRica.
We had to sign it in the us.
Mm-hmm.
So, Put on a cute, like put on acute dress, went to the
courthouse, got the paperwork,and then went out to the beach
(19:05):
in Seattle.
My best friend signed it on asthe officiant, and my parents
just happened to be in town.
That was my like mini, minimovement.
That's like a true, which wasvery sweet.
And then we had 14 of us inCosta Rica for my, like, what I
call my wedding.
Mm-hmm.
(19:25):
Um, where we had.
A semi standard Reed Bells kindof ceremony and stuff like that
and dinner and all of that.
And then we ended up also havinga 50 75 person reception in my
hometown.
Um, because my parents really,really wanted to have all their
friends and family all in oneroom.
(19:45):
And I'm like, yeah, I get that.
I was the first one to getmarried, so I was like, That's
very nice of you.
Yeah, I would've been like,right.
I sort of ran the gambit.
As far as weddings go, I mean, Ididn't have like a massive
reception or anything like that.
Um, but I learned to value everysize of wedding from that of I
(20:06):
like would not have changed asingle thing about it.
However, if I had to choose afavorite.
It was actually the very first,very mini little tiny ceremony
on the beach.
Mm.
Yeah.
Um, so anytime I'm talking toanyone that's eloping, obviously
a lot of elopement kind of stemfrom this idea of, you know,
(20:29):
COVID, we shut everything down,we couldn't really get married,
so let's just go do it.
Um, there's so much more,there's only so much more
personal about those tiny, tinyelopement.
That I don't think you can getfrom a big wedding.
I love big weddings.
I love like many, like, youknow, 20, 30, 40 people
(20:50):
weddings.
But when it's just the two ofyou and an efficient, maybe two
witnesses and a photographer,It's like, I've never, there's
like words I would've never saidout loud because I was, I, I'm
an intrcutt by, by design.
Mm-hmm.
And there's like things that Iwould've never said as far as my
vows go in something big.
(21:10):
Mm-hmm.
Yeah.
So is that what, what makes thefirst one your favorite?
That Yeah, that is totally whatit is.
And it's just, there's somethingso precious about it.
Mm-hmm.
Like we, we didn't put a ton oflike, emotional planning into
it.
We just sort of went and did it.
(21:34):
Um, a l as someone that is aplanner now, it's like, maybe I
would probably plan a little bitmore next time.
But there's, there's somethingvery special about like just
going out and doing.
Um, and then I truly valuedbeing able to then go back and
have the wedding and have thereception and do all of the
(21:56):
things that, you know, were,were important to me.
Cuz being around my family issuper important to me as well.
Um, but I maybe didn't wannastand up in front of them and
like ball my eyes out whilevowing all these things to
another person.
Also super famous.
Mm-hmm.
That's so.
(22:16):
That gives you such valuableinsight.
Mm-hmm.
Into, I feel like youexperiencing that firsthand when
you're talking to a couple andhearing them touch on certain
things, it probably makes youfeel like, okay, I really feel
like this kind of wedding wouldbe really suitable for you or
whatever.
Like, that's awesome.
(22:37):
Well, and financially speaking,I mean, if you don't want a long
engagement, but you don't wanna.
Spend a ton of money.
It's like, okay, go.
Go have an elopement and then in10 years at your vow renewal,
let's have a big party.
Like I, I found that I had areally good insight in talking
to a lot of couples during Covidthat were so devastated by the
(23:01):
fact that they couldn't havetheir wedding that they'd been
planning for so long.
Because it's, there's stillvalue in both.
There's still a lot of value injust the two of you jumping
somewhere really pretty andtaking cool photos and like
bawling your eyes out and notbeing self-conscious about all,
like the hundred eyeballswatching you.
And then there's also a lot ofvalue in having a hundred people
(23:23):
with you to support and loveyou.
So I, I think, yeah, it gave mea lot of really good perspective
on, on the different kinds ofweddings you can have.
Right.
Yeah.
So it sounds like you're sayingthe first steps are kind of
picking location and also kindof the vibes you're going for.
(23:45):
Yeah.
Yeah.
I think it's location, kind oflike the, the vibes you're going
with, what you're comfortablewith, and then sort of scanning
not only your budget, but alsothe other opinions around you.
Mm-hmm.
Because you always, I.
I'm always a fan.
If you want to say to yourmother-in-law, like, screw it,
(24:07):
I'm gonna do my wedding my way,and I don't care what you think,
but you're also gonna be withyour mother-in-law probably for
most of your life.
So if you can give a littleconcession here and there, like
when with my mom, I very muchwas like, you know, the wedding
reception is for you.
Like, let's do all the thingsthat you wanna do, and I'll show
up and I'll wear a pretty dressand we'll have a great time.
(24:27):
And my mom loved it, and I likefun too, you know?
So it's, yeah, making sure thatyou're balancing what you want,
but also also with the peoplearound you because they will
stress you out real quick ifyou're not careful.
Right?
Yeah.
What would you say to thosecouples that really do want to
(24:50):
either.
Adjust us experience.
Mm-hmm.
Or something super small, likedo you support them in
navigating how to kinda putthemselves first and sort of
Yeah.
Communicate to others?
Yeah.
I mean, boundaries are obviouslyreally important in, in life as
they are in weddings.
So if you're really hard set onwhat you wanna do, then go do
(25:14):
it.
And I support you to do that.
Um, There's always a way to findlike a compromise.
Very much like, I mean, family'sfamily.
You're, everyone's gonna knowtheir family the best and if
it's truly not a relationshipthat's gonna serve you, I don't
want you to like push yourselfinto, into pleasing that person
(25:35):
if they're really genuinely notbeing supportive.
But if they are reallysupportive and they love you and
they just, you.
Have had this vision of yourwedding day as well.
There there is a compromise thatcan be made there too.
Um, which is a lot of the waythat we did our wedding was to
have something for us to havesomething for like a really
(25:56):
close-knit circle around us, andthen to also be able to kind of
bring in the bigger family andthings like that.
Mm-hmm.
Yeah.
All things can balance, which isalways so hard.
Yeah.
Yeah.
Weddings I think are, they canbe tricky to navigate.
(26:16):
Yeah.
For as far as wedding goes or,um, not weddings go as far as
balance goes.
Yeah.
And they can sometimes bring outthe worst in people.
Mm-hmm.
Yes.
So we've, we've seen it,haven't, no, I think a lot of
that is, is sort of changing, Ithink kind of our generation is,
is letting go.
A lot of that even, you know, myother friends that are parents
(26:39):
are like, I mean, if they wannago to college, great.
If they don't, that's great.
You know, growing up it waslike, no, you're gonna go to
college.
Like the, that's your option.
You're gonna have a wedding.
That's your.
And I think we're, we're kind ofsteering away from that in a lot
of ways, um, which I think isreally good.
Yeah.
(27:00):
Yeah.
Hopefully, hopefully we stillgot some s to me, but Yeah.
Yeah.
Change is slow, unfortunately.
Mm-hmm.
Yeah.
So what would you say, um, thisis kind of a, like a two for one
question mm-hmm.
But I'm curious, yeah.
Just like what your biggestplanning tips are when planning
an elopement, and do you thinkthat differs at all when you're
(27:24):
working with a straight coupleversus an LGBTQ couple?
Um, biggest tips would be knowyour budget.
I meet a lot of couples that donot have an established budget.
Um, especially if they're comingto me later in the planning
process and they're like, oh no,we just like, aren't gonna spend
(27:44):
a ton of money.
It's like, no, you need anumber.
Mm-hmm.
Um, and I know that that can bea difficult conversation to
have, especially when you'regoing into a new marriage, but
it, it's.
Every, a lot about weddingplanning is practice for
marriage.
So it is, you know, how are wegonna resolve conflict?
How are we gonna budget ourmoney?
We, we have to have those thingsin place.
(28:05):
Otherwise, there's not a wholelot certain vendors can do to
help you.
Mm-hmm.
Um, if I don't have a solidbudget, DJs cost a lot across
the board.
Photographers cost a lot acrossthe board.
If we don't narrow down at all,I'm just gonna send you what
looks best and then you're gonnalook at it at the end of the day
(28:27):
and be like, wow, I spent waytoo much money.
Um, especially cuz I feel likethe wedding industry
unfortunately, does push you tospend more money.
They want you to have morethings.
They want you to get the, likebridal robes and stuff like
that.
It's like you don't need all ofit.
Have a set budget.
(28:47):
You're gonna know where toinvest your money, as opposed to
just ending up with all thesethings that you didn't really
need.
Mm-hmm.
You're, yeah, you're being somuch more intentional.
Yeah.
Um, cause I think that's thething too, is that, I don't
wanna say, this isn'tnecessarily like pushback, but
just in the sense of like, I do,you know, bump into a lot of
(29:12):
couples who are like, oh, youknow, Like we've budgeted a
thousand dollars for aphotographer or something where
it's like, okay, great.
Where are you gonna find that?
Like there's, there's thatelement too of like, there's
definitely some like lack ofknowledge about what cost in the
(29:36):
industry for sure.
Especially when it comes to DJsand photographers and
videographers.
I've, I've really noticed that.
Um, but that's why for me as aplanner, it's so much more
useful for them to be like, thisis the cutall like number we
have to work with, as opposed tocategorizing it really narrowly.
Mm-hmm.
Because if photography's reallyimportant to you, let's spend
(29:56):
more on the photographer.
If food's really important toyou, let's spend more on the
food.
Mm-hmm.
But if I don't have that bignumber, there's a big range in
there of what we could spend onand it just starts to inflate
really quickly.
Right.
Yeah.
That's something that I'll, I'lltalk to my couples about too is
like not as like an end all beall, but just as an exercise.
(30:20):
Like if you could only havethree or four vendors there,
what, who would you pick?
Like what vendors would you puton that very tiny list?
Yeah, great.
Like that's where yourpriorities lie, so Yeah.
Yeah.
I literally, in my intake form,in my like questionnaire that I
sent out, I'm like, what's yourtop three vendors?
You have to.
Mm-hmm.
And more often than not, it isphotography and dj and I'm like,
(30:45):
that's great.
Let's put more money towardsthat.
And maybe DIY a little bit moreon the bar side or on the food
side.
I, I think people are so stuckin like the traditional things
they have to have in general inweddings that they forget that
like, your budget works for you,but you have to have a number in
(31:06):
order to make it work for you.
Mm-hmm.
Yeah.
Yeah.
And I just, my whole episodelast week was all about changing
traditions in weddings.
Mm-hmm.
So like, I think we'redefinitely in that era too, as
far as mm-hmm.
Like, kinda like you've beensaying, tradition can be
important and it has its place,but that doesn't mean you have
to do it.
So, yeah.
(31:27):
It's only if it's important toyou.
Mm-hmm.
Right.
And.
Just following up on that secondquestion.
Mm-hmm.
Do you feel like there is adifference at all when you're
working with a straight coupleversus an LGBTQ couple?
Or is it pretty similar?
It's generally pretty simple.
Similar, I would say.
(31:47):
Um, there's definitely likecertain questions I ask LGBTQ
couples that I don't necessarilyask my straight couples.
Like, you know, is there some,are we like out, are we okay
with all the family?
Like how did that go?
Unfortunately, there's a lot of,a lot of safety questions that I
(32:07):
have to ask, um, because I wannamake sure that they're protected
as well.
Um, I mean, and I do ask mystraight couples like, you know,
is there any family drama I needto know about all that kind of
stuff.
Um, but it feels a little bitmore personal with my, um, my
career couples for sure.
Mm-hmm.
But as far as the actual likeplanning process goes, it tends
(32:28):
to be pretty much the same.
There's, you know, definitely adifferent of language in there.
Like, you know, do you bothwanna be called brides or is
there a different name you'dlike to go by?
Um, I tend to stick with like,you know, team so-and-so, and
team so-and-so and sobridesmaids and groomsman.
Mm-hmm.
(32:48):
Um, things like that, just tomake sure that everyone is
feeling inclusive.
And I do that with my straightcouples as well.
But you definitely like, reallywanna make sure you're doing
that with, with more inclusivecouple.
Yeah.
Oh, that's super cute.
I've never heard the team thingbefore.
I love that.
Yeah.
Yeah.
Makes it feel like they're allrooting for them instead too.
I know, right?
It's super cute.
(33:09):
Oh great.
It gets confusing every once ina while.
Cause I did have, um, I hadAmber and Laura once a few years
ago, and my name is Amber and myassistant's name was Laura.
So we had Amber and Team Laura,but then we just decided to mess
with them.
So I only hung out with TeamLaura and she only hung out with
(33:30):
Team Amber.
It was very fun.
Oh my gosh.
And you're like, we'll just bothget married today too.
You know, like, what if I, whatif I did the first look instead
of the other Amber?
Oh my gosh.
That's so funny.
Yeah, it was funny.
That's, that's encouraging tohear though.
While you are, you know, workingwith those couples and
(33:51):
acknowledging their differences,it's also not like, okay, we
have to go through somethingentirely different.
So, right.
Yeah.
I mean, ultimately a wedding isa wedding breaking tradition
aside, you know, they're,they're pretty standard
sometimes for the most part.
Um, so it's a lot of the samelike, okay, are you gonna do
(34:11):
first look or are you not gonnado first look.
Mm-hmm.
Right.
Yeah.
Right.
So I feel like I already kind ofknow the answer to this, but
mm-hmm.
Do you support Leave No Trace?
Yeah.
And how, how do you usuallyrecommend couples to easily
incorporate that into their,like, small wedding or alone
(34:33):
day?
Yeah.
Um, I, I mean, I obviouslydefinitely support it.
The best way I've seen it doneis something like, uh, going on
a hiking trail to like aspecific location to elope or
something like that.
Um, and I tend to just say leantowards whatever the hikers are
doing.
Um, If you're, if you're gettinggoing to elope somewhere on a
(34:57):
mountaintop or at the Badlandsor something like that, you more
than likely are doing thatbecause it's a place you love
and it's cuz you enjoy hikingand you enjoy camping and all
that stuff.
So most of the time when I meetthose couples, they already have
a lot of that knowledge on, onhow to do it.
Um, but you know, it's a lot ofwhat comes in with you goes out
with you Don't leave trashbehind.
(35:18):
Especially being from thePacific Northwest for a long
time.
Just don't light any fires.
Just no fires, no campfires, noe-cigarettes.
Just don't, just don't do it.
Mm-hmm.
No gender reveal parties thatliterally set off one of the
wildfires a couple years ago.
Oh my gosh.
That was terrible.
Yeah.
Um, and then just like standardpractice for when I go hiking,
(35:40):
um, is I always carry trash bagsin my.
In my backpack.
So anytime I see someone else'strash, I just take it with me.
Um, and then just not bring amuch of stuff like mm-hmm.
You don't need to bring anentire picnic basket up there.
Like go have dinner at arestaurant somewhere else after.
You don't need to like, bring abig arch.
(36:02):
You're in nature.
Nature is your arch.
Yes.
Redoing yes.
And also you have to carry it.
So that would suck.
Exactly.
I think that kind of eliminatesa lot of what you'd typically
leave behind at a wedding, justcuz you're gonna carry it up the
mountain if you wanna have it.
(36:23):
Ooh, that's an interestingquestion to ask your traditional
wedding couples, if you can'tcarry it.
Who you're wanting and like, doyou really need it?
You really need it.
Do you need that extra fluffycouch behind you?
Only if it's going in yourliving room afterwards.
Yeah.
So true.
Yeah.
(36:43):
That's great.
The harder leave no trace iswhen you get into like
destination elopement, like whatI did in Costa Rica.
Um, and a lot of what we didwith that was lean on the people
that were there, lean on thelocals to kind of know what
exactly they should do.
I had a wedding planner throughthe resort that we got married
at.
(37:03):
Um, and they basically are like,here's your options.
Like here's our, here's our oneflorist, here's our one
photographer.
Um, and I, I know a lot ofpeople get frustrated with that
just because, especially in thestates, you're used to options
used to just like pick andchoose your photographer's vibe
and your florist and get amockup bouquet and all that
jazz.
And it's like, well, you don'thave those options.
(37:25):
And.
Important to understand thatlike, these are their locals,
this is their team, they'regonna know what's best.
And to really, I mean, this kindof goes in general for weddings,
but really try to trust yourvendors and trust the people
that you're working with, um,because they're ultimately gonna
give you the best experience.
Mm-hmm.
Mm-hmm.
(37:45):
And so a lot of that was like,we didn't do, you know, any
non-indigenous flowers to CostaRica?
Um, we got married on the beach,but it was a public beach, so,
you know, people are walking byand you just, you're just okay
with it.
At one point we got a photo witha very drunk Italian man, um,
who was very sweet and, and didgive us a hundred dollars.
(38:09):
He walked by and he's like thistiny little speedo.
He was very sweet.
I mean, hey, I would do that tooif I got hundred dollars.
Well, in Costa Rica is very,it's very, very community based.
Like weddings are a pretty bigthing.
So like, you know, some localsjust like joined in the dance
party and it's like that.
(38:30):
That's just, that's how it is.
So you have to like make sureyou understand like local
customs and local cultures.
And I know a lot of people allin Hawaii and there's a lot of
questionable things that.
That are made as far as choicesin Hawaii.
Um, so I think really being ableto reach out to somebody local
and if, if, if Hawaii's like,you must do it.
(38:54):
I'm sure they wouldn't mind thetourist funds, but also like,
make sure you're.
Working with people that aregonna point you in the right
direction and not necessarilyjust like, give all your monies
to a Sandals resort.
Ooh, yeah.
Yeah, for sure.
Yeah.
Yeah.
Being intentional.
I think it's a, that's a commontheme.
(39:14):
It is.
Yeah.
I think that's the, the bigcutarching one is, is really
intentionality.
Mm-hmm.
Yeah.
And just touching on what yousaid earlier, um, About like
vendors, you know, knowing bestand stuff like that.
I think that's just kind of alsoanother huge piece of advice
for, for this too, is makingsure that you are picking
(39:37):
vendors who like, you know, Arenot just like saying yes to you
because it like you happen to beopen, but who are like
emphatically like, yes, I standwith you, I support you.
Mm-hmm.
I believe in you and I haveexperience here.
Like yeah.
Yeah.
There's definitely a lot ofgreenwashing and.
Rainbow washing, for lack ofbetter term, out there in the
(39:59):
world.
Yeah.
Like interview people, likegenuinely get on, you know, a
call like this and actually talkto a person.
Mm-hmm.
Because, you know, emailing youcan only get so much from how a
person actually is and what,what they actually stand for.
And I think a, a good positivething I'm seeing is a lot of
vendors on online are reallybeing open about like, I, I,
(40:21):
this is what I think about thisparticular subject, you know,
not shying away from like hardpolitical topics and things like
that.
Mm-hmm.
Mm-hmm.
When you come, when you come tome, it's like, you know, you
know, my values already for themost part.
Mm-hmm.
Right.
Yeah.
Super.
Great.
Well, my last question, I know,I know.
(40:44):
Yeah.
But I, I do think that is likea, a common thing now too, is.
People being more open, um,hopefully for the better.
So yeah, I was gonna say forbetter or worse, but at least,
at least you know what you'regetting yourself into before,
before you jump in, right?
Yep, exactly.
Well, to kind of wrap this allup, um, you know, specific
(41:08):
couples or scenarios aside, likemm-hmm.
What would you say is your bestcutall advice to any couple who
might be planning right.
Um, I think if y'all didn'tcatch it already from this
conversation, but be intentionalabout your choices, really.
Like, take the time to considerwhat the two of you actually
really want.
(41:29):
Um, and make compromises onlywhere it makes sense to you.
Hmm.
I love that.
I love that.
That's going to be like, that'sthe line of the, that's my
tagline.
Yes.
Okay.
So with every guest I have onhere, I always like to do just
like a fun little lightninground.
(41:52):
Not the, the things we haven'tbeen talking about, haven't been
fun, but, you know, um, just tohelp us end on a really fun note
and help everyone get to knowyou.
So, are you ready?
I'm ready.
Okay, great.
What would be your absolutefavorite way to spend a day?
(42:12):
Lately, so I have a, a sunroomon my, my house is 120 years old
and I have this little sunroom,and when it is hot in the
summer, I've been sitting outthere doing a little hot yoga in
the morning and making myself alittle hot yoga studio and then
having a coffee and thensnuggling with my cats.
Hmm.
That's beautiful.
(42:33):
Yeah.
It's where do make the most outof the heat.
Yeah.
Yeah.
I mean, it gets hot in there.
It like, it is a hot yoga studionaturally too, like yeah.
Wow.
We love it.
Um, not too much in the winter.
Oh yeah.
Yeah, then it's a cold studio.
Then it's more of an ice bathsituation.
(42:55):
Has health benefits too.
You know?
It does.
Which, yeah.
Speaking of, what do you missmost about Minnesota and what's
your favorite thing about thePacific Northwest?
Now, the thing I think I'vemissed the most about Minnesota
is the people, which I know iskind of like a sideline answer,
but, The Minnesota nice is veryreal and you don't realize how
(43:18):
real it is until you leave.
Where like in Pacific Northwest,there's this thing called the
Seattle Freeze where it's justlike, you know, if you're
walking down the street inMinnesota, like someone will say
hi to you and you just like sayhi back and you smile and it's
like kind of a nice littleinteraction, not a thing.
In the Pacific Northwest,everyone looks like 20 feet away
from each other.
You don't even look at eachother.
(43:40):
I, I definitely found it waslike a little harder to make
friends out there just to likekind of break through the ice a
little bit.
But yeah, I miss Minnesotapeople.
Pacific Northwest is thelandscape and the weather.
Mm, mm-hmm.
Yeah, it's, it's nice to be ableto like look out your window and
see the ocean and also mountainsat the same time.
(44:01):
Yeah, that's pretty hard tocompete with it.
Yeah.
And you know, it doesn't getbelow like 50 degrees.
Oh, that's super nice.
Although there was a bunch ofsnow there.
Not a bunch.
There was some snow there.
Yeah.
The last couple years there'sbeen snow like every Christmas,
but then it like goes awaywithin a couple weeks.
Okay.
Yeah.
So sounds like festival worlds.
(44:21):
Yeah.
Little bit.
Yeah.
Except there's so many.
That.
Mm-hmm.
Like this whole city shuts down.
Cause there's no way you can getup a hill or down a hill without
big accidents happening.
Yeah.
Oh my God.
I can't imagine.
Ooh, one of my friends liveslike basically in the mountains
and she sent me a video of herand her son sledding down their
(44:45):
driveway.
Oh my gosh.
There was so much ice.
That's great.
Yeah.
Wow.
All right.
And what is your favorite colorof the rainbow?
If you had asked me a coupleyears ago, I would've said red,
but lately I've been leaningreally hard into green.
Hmm.
(45:07):
Kind of goes well with the wholenature.
Yeah.
Glacier kinda, yeah.
Yeah.
It might be because I missed theamount of green that's in the
Pacific Northwest when it'slittle out here.
Mm-hmm.
Oh my gosh.
Yeah.
It's terrible here right now,but soon.
Soon it will be spring.
Yes, exactly.
Well, thank you Amber, so muchfor your time, for your
(45:29):
knowledge, for your awesometips.
Um, we really appreciate you andif any of you are thinking about
getting married out in.
Either the Pacific Northwest orSouth Dakota.
Uh, you can find Amber atGlacier Weddings and events on
Instagram.
So, yeah.
Is there anything else you wannasay to the listeners before we
(45:52):
sign out?
Huh?
No, this is a, this is great andyou should do the, like you
subscribe E Brady things,however we do that on, on the
podcast.
Yes, exactly what she said.
Yes, yes.
All right.
Clearly beloved, we'll see youhere next week.
All right, clearly beloved,welcome to this week's episode.
I'm super excited to have Amberof Glacier weddings and events
here with me today, and I thinkyou are all gonna really wanna
listen in to this episode.
So Amber, if you could introduceyourself, your pronouns, or any
other identities that areimportant to.
(00:21):
Sure.
Yeah.
Uh, my name's Amber Jackson.
I'm like you said, owner ofGlacier Weddings and Events.
Um, she, her pronouns, otheridentifying factors.
I'm a cat lcut, a stepmom, andlove a good margarita.
Yes.
We'll go with That's the wholeidentity.
The whole margarita.
Yep.
(00:41):
Yes.
Oh, that's great.
Um, yeah.
Can you tell us a little bitabout.
Will, you just told us a littlebit about yourself, which I
appreciate, but Yeah.
About your business.
Yeah.
What you do, how you gotstarted.
Yeah, so I actually, I went tocollege.
I have a bachelor's of fine artsin all things dance.
(01:04):
Um, so if you wanted to go downthat dance history tangent, I
could totally do that if youwanted.
Um, but basically moved toSeattle, um, cuz it was a big
city that wasn't, you know, LAor New York, that I thought
theoretically I could afford.
I'm not being super affordable.
And then, um, but tried to be aprofessional dancer for a really
long time and the job that kindof fit the best with that was
(01:25):
catering.
So I sort of clawed my way upthrough catering, um, and found
that I kind of really lovedevents, um, and especially
weddings.
Um, worked for, you know, acouple other wedding planners.
At this point.
I've done cut a hundred events,um, and then started my business
two years.
So just kind of getting started,um, my main focus with the
(01:47):
business is to push peopletowards more eco-conscious
choices.
Um, I know that no one's gonnabe able to make a perfect
decision.
Like there are no perfect zero,a thousand percent, zero waste
weddings out there.
Um, but trying to kind of pushpeople towards a smarter choice
and really considering theethics as well as like, you
(02:07):
know, the packaging and all ofthose elements of, of
sustainability that goes intoan.
Once you start seeing, you know,giant tears of cake thrown in
the garbage, it's hard to not belike, oh, let's maybe not do
that.
Oh my gosh.
Yeah.
You see, you see a lot atweddings.
Mm-hmm.
You're kind of just like, oh,I'm gonna just, just fly a
(02:28):
little bit inside.
Yeah.
Yeah.
And I, I was actually justthinking about that before we
hopped on, is any of.
Like related to your name or howdid you pick your name?
So my husband actually picked myname.
Okay.
Um, he had just gotten back fromGlacier National Park, like
(02:48):
right before I was starting mybusiness and I was struggling to
find a name.
I didn't wanna go with the,like, you know, this and this
name.
There's a lot of like, you know,evergreen and Ivy and Pearl and
something and names out there.
And I wanted to do somethingthat, Environmental without
feeling super on the nose.
(03:09):
So he's like, yeah, just gotback from Glacier National Park.
What about Glacier?
I'm like, well, that makessense.
That's great.
Have you been there?
I haven't.
I wanna go so bad.
I feel like you could do like awhole like brand shoot there.
Oh, I know.
It's like my, there's these icecaves in Washington that I've
(03:29):
been dying to do a style shootin forever, but they're like a
little bit dangerous to go in.
Got it.
Yeah.
So you have to like hit the likeperfect time of the season and
then if you do that, it's alittle chilly out.
Oh yeah.
That makes sense.
Yep.
You're like, actually I just ownthese glaciers.
This is just, yeah, these arejust actually, so do you ever
(03:52):
wanna go out with me in themiddle of winter?
Let's do it.
I mean, I'm from Minnesota, so Ican We'll be fine.
Handle it.
Yeah.
Yeah.
And you're from Minnesota too,right?
Yeah, I grew up in Farmington,so it's a small town just
outside the cities.
That is where I went to highschool.
No way.
(04:12):
Oh my gosh.
What year did you graduate?
So I actually didn't go toFarmington High School.
Mm-hmm.
I went to the school rightacross the street, the little
private school.
Well, like we could literallysee Farmington High School right
across the road, huh?
Yeah.
I don't know if you, smallworld.
Yeah.
That's so crazy.
(04:33):
Oh my gosh.
Um, yeah, I went to college inMankato.
Okay.
Yeah.
Very cool.
And then after, after that,that's when you moved out to
Seattle?
Yeah.
Okay.
Wow.
I love it.
Yeah.
And I love that now you havethat perspective of like being
in the Midwest.
Mm-hmm.
(04:53):
And, and then also being out inthe per Pacific Northwest.
Mm-hmm.
Um, Which I will have a questionon later, but just to kind of
give people more context, um, Ido see that a lot of your
passion is about ecoconsciousness mm-hmm.
And sustainability, um, as awedding and enrollment planner.
(05:14):
So what does that mean and whatdoes it mean to you personally?
So for me personally, a lot ofit is about.
There's this, there's thisYouTuber that talks about eco
minimalism as opposed to likeeco perfectionism, so mm-hmm.
It, it's more about buying less,buying secondhand, using less
(05:40):
disposing of things properly.
That, that's kind of where mymindset goes more towards,
because I mean, Unfortunately,there's only a whole lot that
you can do as an individual.
So a lot of it is advocating forthe change that you want to see.
Um, so, but that's personallykind of my perspective on it and
the way I implement that, eh,uh, the way I implement that
(06:06):
into my business is really bypushing clients to just make
better choices.
Not everyone can have anelopement.
You know, there's families,there's cultural things that
other people are gonna have tokind of work through in a
wedding.
And as we all know, there's alot of emotions tied to
weddings.
(06:27):
You know, a lot of moms thathave been dreaming about their
daughter's wedding for a reallylong time.
So helping them kind of.
Their ethics as well as all theother circumstances around their
weddings and trying to makebetter choices.
Like you don't have to have aperfectly vegan wedding to have
an eco wedding.
Mm-hmm.
Would I love it if you did as avegan myself, right?
(06:49):
Yeah.
Right.
That feels so, that feels.
Exactly like the right approachbecause it's like if you fall
too much on the side of this ishow things have to do, be done.
Mm-hmm.
Then people are just gonna feelnervous about messing up or
Right.
You know, anxious as opposed tofeeling like motivated or
inspired Yeah.
(07:10):
To do something.
Yeah.
I try to keep it prettyrealistic.
For, you know, what you canactually accomplish.
I have, I have, I've done, youknow, massive 400 person
weddings, which in and ofthemselves are very much not
sustainable, but you know, theyalways rent everything.
They'll get everythingsecondhand to core wise.
(07:31):
We donate their flowers at theend of the night.
Like we try to do all thesethings for them so that they can
still feel like they made a moreethical decision at the end of
the.
Yeah.
Yeah.
And so I guess you even justkind of touched on it, but how,
like what kinds of principlesshow up in your business as far
(07:51):
as eco consciousness?
So the main principles arebuying less.
Buying secondhand first anddisposing of it properly.
Those are like my, my three bigthings.
Um, the one I think getsforgotten the most is disposing
properly.
Hmm.
What's nice about the PacificNorthwest Northwest is it is,
(08:12):
There's, their setup is just alittle bit easier to work with,
um, versus, you know, movingback to the Midwest, I'm like,
oh, I don't even have a greenbeam like that.
I just don't automatically get agreen bin.
Um, so you definitely have to doa little bit more research, but
it's totally doable.
Um, I have, you know, aneighborhood compost that I just
drop on my compost off everyweek.
Um, so I, I think it, it can befor sure doable, no matter where
(08:35):
you're.
Yeah, that was actually thequestion I was gonna ask you
earlier is how, now that you'vekind of seen both sides mm-hmm.
The Midwest versus PacificNorthwest, how do you see that
showing up differently?
Like, how are they differentfrom each other?
Yeah.
Um, especially when it comes toelopement, it's just so much
more common in the PacificNorthwest to be able to do that.
(08:58):
Um, so it's, it's less.
If you talk to a weddingplanner, they're gonna, they're
gonna question it a little bitless of like, oh, you want Alop
open a mountaintop, great.
Versus out here, they're like,wait, you wanna do what?
You sure you don't wanna likefly to the mid Midwest or the
Pacific Northwest or Colorado orsomething to do that?
And it's like, well, there'slots of places you can do it
here too.
(09:19):
The bad lands are beautiful.
Yes.
Know you recently postedsomething on your Instagram with
a bunch of different places.
Yeah.
Um, I.
I've always wanted do a weddingup in International Falls.
Mm-hmm.
Or, um, even mini Haha Falls hassome really great spots and
that's, you know, dead in themiddle of the city.
Yep.
Yeah, yeah.
(09:40):
No, I fully agree.
I'm, I'm really trying toconvince people that there's
hidden gems in the Midwest andthat Yeah.
We can sometimes be teeth alittle cheaper too.
Oh, it's significantly cheaper,I'll tell you that.
Especially with that planeticket.
Right.
Yeah.
How would you say though, interms of, and, and again, like
(10:02):
we want this to feel inclusiveto everybody, but like if you
were talking to a couple inSouth Dakota, for example
mm-hmm.
And like trying to be like,yeah, we're gonna be sustainable
and stuff.
Do they generally receive itdifferently than someone living
out in Washington or.
I, I've gotten a wide variety inboth locations, honestly.
(10:28):
I think because my approach isnot like you have to do X, Y,
and Z number of things.
People are a little bit morecomfortable with it.
Mm-hmm.
Um, because then they're able tokind of make decisions within
what makes sense for them, asopposed to if I was like, no,
you have to have a vegan menu.
You have to compost everythingat the end of the night.
You cannot purchase a singleitem.
(10:50):
You have to rent or buysecondhand everything.
Then I think I'd probably have alittle bit more push.
Um, but that's, that's why Ikind of go for that more
realistic approach of like, whatwe can accomplish together as
opposed to what I'm putting ontoyou to accomplish.
Sure.
I definitely get a little more,I get more questions in the, in
(11:14):
the Midwest than I did in thePacific Northwest.
Yeah.
Yeah, I could see that.
I think sometimes, cuz I've donea handful of weddings, um, like
in the Dakotas as well, and it'sjust like, you know, it can be a
different vibe of like, okay,there's a whole, there's a whole
bin just full of beer cans.
Okay, great.
(11:38):
Yeah.
Yeah.
And like a, a lot of what I'venoticed is, especially in the
Dakotas, is it, it's like theimmediate ideas to go to a
ballroom, like go to a hotelballroom, go to a hotel
ballroom, and that's where mostof the weddings take place.
And it's like, well, there'sother options, right?
Yeah.
Yeah.
But cutall, it sounds likeyou're saying the, the idea kind
(12:01):
of is, It can be for anyone.
Like the way you present it isthat it doesn't matter where you
live or like mm-hmm.
Like it's accessible for you todo and I'll show you how to do
it kind of thing.
Yeah, exactly.
That's great.
I love that.
We need more of that.
(12:23):
Yeah.
So kind of on that same note ofeco consciousness and also
trying.
You know, be welcoming.
Mm-hmm.
How do you kind of see thatintersection between eco
consciousness and beinginclusive in your business?
I mean, in general they're the,the eco-conscious bride out
(12:48):
there, or, or, or groom orwhoever, um, that's gonna book
me is generally gonna lean morein a certain direction,
politically speaking, so tospeak.
So that in and of itself islike, that's probably where my
client meshes in with, um, beinginclusive.
But I also, I'm pretty vocalabout it.
(13:09):
I'm, I'm definitely not shyabout like, Hey, this is for
everybody.
I don't care what gender youare.
I don't care what your situationis.
I don't care if there's twopeople or maybe three or maybe
four, like especially having,you know, lived in the Pacific
Northwest for a long time.
That's, that's just stuff yousee, like, it's just sort of,
Normal.
Um, and it's something I'vedefinitely had to kind of push
(13:31):
back on a little bit, being backhere of like, no, it's actually
just fine.
You can just love whoever youwanna love them.
Um, but I, I wear a pronoun pinto all my weddings.
I feel like that's a really, um,like, easy way to do.
I actually have it right here.
Yes, we love it.
My little yellow pin.
Oh, so cute.
(13:52):
Yes, everybody go by one ofthese.
It's super great.
Well, and and for me, what Itell my clients is, you know, if
you are not comfortable with mewearing it, I'm totally fine to
not wear it.
If, if that's something that youdon't wanna like open up a can
of worms and out somebody onaccident or something like that,
but I'd rather have like thatconversation with, you know,
uncle Jerry or whoever with methan with the person we're.
(14:15):
Protect at that point.
Like, I'm not trying to outanybody.
I don't wanna like open upconversations that we're not
comfortable having on a weddingday, but I'd rather, if you're
gonna get upset about something,be upset at me, not at them.
Hmm.
Yeah.
That's really great.
And you're just, you're kind ofsignaling to people like it's
okay.
Yeah.
You're even just like having it.
(14:38):
In your like email signatureline of like, I, I've just
recently booked, um, a lesbiancouple and they're like, we
booked you because we saw that.
Hmm.
Because we like, justimmediately that signal's like,
okay, we're good.
Yep.
Like, you care and you're readyto hear them out and Yeah.
Yeah.
That's great.
Yeah.
Yeah.
I'm gonna put some like links inthe show notes for some pronoun
(15:00):
pins cuz Yeah, it's a supergreat way to, and it's so easy,
like it's such a simple thingthat like makes such a great
impact that you don't realizeuntil, like I had a non-binary
bridesmaid.
They decided they wanted to becalled a bridesmaid on a
groomsman.
Um, that.
(15:20):
We wore a pronoun pin on theirbest friend's wedding day, and
there was a lot of familymembers that were really
uncomfortable with it.
Mm-hmm.
And they wore it to therehearsal and I asked them, I
was like, would would you bemore comfortable if I also wore
a pronoun pin?
And so that was the first day Iended up wearing one.
And to then have them come up tome the other night, like almost
in tears saying that they wereso appreciative of it, that they
(15:43):
felt so much more safe.
Like they could come to somebodyif they needed to.
That sold it for me.
I've never done a weddingwithout one sense, cuz I was
like, oh yeah.
I'm like, oh, I'm gonna cry.
Just thinking about that.
I know.
It's so great.
Yeah.
All right people, hopefully thatsold you.
Yeah.
That's just wear a pronoun pin.
(16:04):
It's very simple.
Right.
Yeah.
And I think on that note, um, Imean that's kind of what I
touched on in, in the Loom eventis that it doesn't always seem
like necessarily an obvious likeconnection, your
intersectionality, but it's kindof like, You know, how we treat
(16:26):
the environment, how we'reimpacting the environment,
always has intersections andlike we're just trying to make
the world a better place.
You know, so I think, well, theenvironment very intensely
affects people and mm-hmm.
We want people to feelcomfortable and we also want
the, the planet to becomfortable.
(16:47):
Yeah.
So it very much Yeah.
Makes sense together.
Yeah.
Yeah.
I love that.
I love that so much.
Wow, you're so cool.
Um, awesome.
Yeah.
Now that we've heard a littlebit about you and like your
passion and everything, um, I'dlove to pick your brain a little
bit about like the planning sideof things since Yeah.
(17:10):
That's what you do.
So if, um, the couples here thatare listening, what would you
kind of say?
As they're planning theirwedding, their elopement, what
do you usually tell people tostart at?
Start wise, especially for anelopement, the biggest thing is
gonna be a location.
(17:31):
Mm-hmm.
Do you wanna stay in your area?
Do you wanna go somewhere else?
Um, I can talk a little bitabout my kind of wedding story.
So I got married eight yearsago, almost nine.
Congrats.
Thank you.
Um, and I actually had threeweddings.
Whoa.
Okay.
Yeah.
We gotta hear.
So I had no intentions of havinga wedding when I got engaged, my
(17:57):
husband and I were pretty youngat the time.
We didn't have the finances forit.
We're like, we just wanna getmarried.
Especially, I mean, I, I do havea stepdaughter, so sometimes
it's just a little bit easierlegally speaking, if something
were to happen.
We'd be, we'd be protected thatway.
Um, so we decided to getmarried, but we didn't wanna
have a wedding.
And then my mother and mymother-in-law went behind our
(18:20):
backs and we're like, well, whatif we just planned a wedding for
you?
Oh, God.
So they, my, my mother-in-lawlives in Costa Rica.
My in-laws ex paid out there.
10 years ago or so.
So they're like, well, what ifwe just have a big family
wedding, like a big familyvacation in Costa Rica and you
(18:42):
just happened to get married?
And I was like, I couldn't dothat.
Sounds fun.
So technically my first weddingwas that we couldn't legally
sign the paperwork in CostaRica.
We had to sign it in the us.
Mm-hmm.
So, Put on a cute, like put on acute dress, went to the
courthouse, got the paperwork,and then went out to the beach
(19:05):
in Seattle.
My best friend signed it on asthe officiant, and my parents
just happened to be in town.
That was my like mini, minimovement.
That's like a true, which wasvery sweet.
And then we had 14 of us inCosta Rica for my, like, what I
call my wedding.
Mm-hmm.
(19:25):
Um, where we had.
A semi standard Reed Bells kindof ceremony and stuff like that
and dinner and all of that.
And then we ended up also havinga 50 75 person reception in my
hometown.
Um, because my parents really,really wanted to have all their
friends and family all in oneroom.
(19:45):
And I'm like, yeah, I get that.
I was the first one to getmarried, so I was like, That's
very nice of you.
Yeah, I would've been like,right.
I sort of ran the gambit.
As far as weddings go, I mean, Ididn't have like a massive
reception or anything like that.
Um, but I learned to value everysize of wedding from that of I
(20:06):
like would not have changed asingle thing about it.
However, if I had to choose afavorite.
It was actually the very first,very mini little tiny ceremony
on the beach.
Mm.
Yeah.
Um, so anytime I'm talking toanyone that's eloping, obviously
a lot of elopement kind of stemfrom this idea of, you know,
(20:29):
COVID, we shut everything down,we couldn't really get married,
so let's just go do it.
Um, there's so much more,there's only so much more
personal about those tiny, tinyelopement.
That I don't think you can getfrom a big wedding.
I love big weddings.
I love like many, like, youknow, 20, 30, 40 people
(20:50):
weddings.
But when it's just the two ofyou and an efficient, maybe two
witnesses and a photographer,It's like, I've never, there's
like words I would've never saidout loud because I was, I, I'm
an intrcutt by, by design.
Mm-hmm.
And there's like things that Iwould've never said as far as my
vows go in something big.
(21:10):
Mm-hmm.
Yeah.
So is that what, what makes thefirst one your favorite?
That Yeah, that is totally whatit is.
And it's just, there's somethingso precious about it.
Mm-hmm.
Like we, we didn't put a ton oflike, emotional planning into
it.
We just sort of went and did it.
(21:34):
Um, a l as someone that is aplanner now, it's like, maybe I
would probably plan a little bitmore next time.
But there's, there's somethingvery special about like just
going out and doing.
Um, and then I truly valuedbeing able to then go back and
have the wedding and have thereception and do all of the
(21:56):
things that, you know, were,were important to me.
Cuz being around my family issuper important to me as well.
Um, but I maybe didn't wannastand up in front of them and
like ball my eyes out whilevowing all these things to
another person.
Also super famous.
Mm-hmm.
That's so.
(22:16):
That gives you such valuableinsight.
Mm-hmm.
Into, I feel like youexperiencing that firsthand when
you're talking to a couple andhearing them touch on certain
things, it probably makes youfeel like, okay, I really feel
like this kind of wedding wouldbe really suitable for you or
whatever.
Like, that's awesome.
(22:37):
Well, and financially speaking,I mean, if you don't want a long
engagement, but you don't wanna.
Spend a ton of money.
It's like, okay, go.
Go have an elopement and then in10 years at your vow renewal,
let's have a big party.
Like I, I found that I had areally good insight in talking
to a lot of couples during Covidthat were so devastated by the
(23:01):
fact that they couldn't havetheir wedding that they'd been
planning for so long.
Because it's, there's stillvalue in both.
There's still a lot of value injust the two of you jumping
somewhere really pretty andtaking cool photos and like
bawling your eyes out and notbeing self-conscious about all,
like the hundred eyeballswatching you.
And then there's also a lot ofvalue in having a hundred people
(23:23):
with you to support and loveyou.
So I, I think, yeah, it gave mea lot of really good perspective
on, on the different kinds ofweddings you can have.
Right.
Yeah.
So it sounds like you're sayingthe first steps are kind of
picking location and also kindof the vibes you're going for.
(23:45):
Yeah.
Yeah.
I think it's location, kind oflike the, the vibes you're going
with, what you're comfortablewith, and then sort of scanning
not only your budget, but alsothe other opinions around you.
Mm-hmm.
Because you always, I.
I'm always a fan.
If you want to say to yourmother-in-law, like, screw it,
(24:07):
I'm gonna do my wedding my way,and I don't care what you think,
but you're also gonna be withyour mother-in-law probably for
most of your life.
So if you can give a littleconcession here and there, like
when with my mom, I very muchwas like, you know, the wedding
reception is for you.
Like, let's do all the thingsthat you wanna do, and I'll show
up and I'll wear a pretty dressand we'll have a great time.
(24:27):
And my mom loved it, and I likefun too, you know?
So it's, yeah, making sure thatyou're balancing what you want,
but also also with the peoplearound you because they will
stress you out real quick ifyou're not careful.
Right?
Yeah.
What would you say to thosecouples that really do want to
(24:50):
either.
Adjust us experience.
Mm-hmm.
Or something super small, likedo you support them in
navigating how to kinda putthemselves first and sort of
Yeah.
Communicate to others?
Yeah.
I mean, boundaries are obviouslyreally important in, in life as
they are in weddings.
So if you're really hard set onwhat you wanna do, then go do
(25:14):
it.
And I support you to do that.
Um, There's always a way to findlike a compromise.
Very much like, I mean, family'sfamily.
You're, everyone's gonna knowtheir family the best and if
it's truly not a relationshipthat's gonna serve you, I don't
want you to like push yourselfinto, into pleasing that person
(25:35):
if they're really genuinely notbeing supportive.
But if they are reallysupportive and they love you and
they just, you.
Have had this vision of yourwedding day as well.
There there is a compromise thatcan be made there too.
Um, which is a lot of the waythat we did our wedding was to
have something for us to havesomething for like a really
(25:56):
close-knit circle around us, andthen to also be able to kind of
bring in the bigger family andthings like that.
Mm-hmm.
Yeah.
All things can balance, which isalways so hard.
Yeah.
Yeah.
Weddings I think are, they canbe tricky to navigate.
(26:16):
Yeah.
For as far as wedding goes or,um, not weddings go as far as
balance goes.
Yeah.
And they can sometimes bring outthe worst in people.
Mm-hmm.
Yes.
So we've, we've seen it,haven't, no, I think a lot of
that is, is sort of changing, Ithink kind of our generation is,
is letting go.
A lot of that even, you know, myother friends that are parents
(26:39):
are like, I mean, if they wannago to college, great.
If they don't, that's great.
You know, growing up it waslike, no, you're gonna go to
college.
Like the, that's your option.
You're gonna have a wedding.
That's your.
And I think we're, we're kind ofsteering away from that in a lot
of ways, um, which I think isreally good.
Yeah.
(27:00):
Yeah.
Hopefully, hopefully we stillgot some s to me, but Yeah.
Yeah.
Change is slow, unfortunately.
Mm-hmm.
Yeah.
So what would you say, um, thisis kind of a, like a two for one
question mm-hmm.
But I'm curious, yeah.
Just like what your biggestplanning tips are when planning
an elopement, and do you thinkthat differs at all when you're
(27:24):
working with a straight coupleversus an LGBTQ couple?
Um, biggest tips would be knowyour budget.
I meet a lot of couples that donot have an established budget.
Um, especially if they're comingto me later in the planning
process and they're like, oh no,we just like, aren't gonna spend
(27:44):
a ton of money.
It's like, no, you need anumber.
Mm-hmm.
Um, and I know that that can bea difficult conversation to
have, especially when you'regoing into a new marriage, but
it, it's.
Every, a lot about weddingplanning is practice for
marriage.
So it is, you know, how are wegonna resolve conflict?
How are we gonna budget ourmoney?
We, we have to have those thingsin place.
(28:05):
Otherwise, there's not a wholelot certain vendors can do to
help you.
Mm-hmm.
Um, if I don't have a solidbudget, DJs cost a lot across
the board.
Photographers cost a lot acrossthe board.
If we don't narrow down at all,I'm just gonna send you what
looks best and then you're gonnalook at it at the end of the day
(28:27):
and be like, wow, I spent waytoo much money.
Um, especially cuz I feel likethe wedding industry
unfortunately, does push you tospend more money.
They want you to have morethings.
They want you to get the, likebridal robes and stuff like
that.
It's like you don't need all ofit.
Have a set budget.
(28:47):
You're gonna know where toinvest your money, as opposed to
just ending up with all thesethings that you didn't really
need.
Mm-hmm.
You're, yeah, you're being somuch more intentional.
Yeah.
Um, cause I think that's thething too, is that, I don't
wanna say, this isn'tnecessarily like pushback, but
just in the sense of like, I do,you know, bump into a lot of
(29:12):
couples who are like, oh, youknow, Like we've budgeted a
thousand dollars for aphotographer or something where
it's like, okay, great.
Where are you gonna find that?
Like there's, there's thatelement too of like, there's
definitely some like lack ofknowledge about what cost in the
(29:36):
industry for sure.
Especially when it comes to DJsand photographers and
videographers.
I've, I've really noticed that.
Um, but that's why for me as aplanner, it's so much more
useful for them to be like, thisis the cutall like number we
have to work with, as opposed tocategorizing it really narrowly.
Mm-hmm.
Because if photography's reallyimportant to you, let's spend
(29:56):
more on the photographer.
If food's really important toyou, let's spend more on the
food.
Mm-hmm.
But if I don't have that bignumber, there's a big range in
there of what we could spend onand it just starts to inflate
really quickly.
Right.
Yeah.
That's something that I'll, I'lltalk to my couples about too is
like not as like an end all beall, but just as an exercise.
(30:20):
Like if you could only havethree or four vendors there,
what, who would you pick?
Like what vendors would you puton that very tiny list?
Yeah, great.
Like that's where yourpriorities lie, so Yeah.
Yeah.
I literally, in my intake form,in my like questionnaire that I
sent out, I'm like, what's yourtop three vendors?
You have to.
Mm-hmm.
And more often than not, it isphotography and dj and I'm like,
(30:45):
that's great.
Let's put more money towardsthat.
And maybe DIY a little bit moreon the bar side or on the food
side.
I, I think people are so stuckin like the traditional things
they have to have in general inweddings that they forget that
like, your budget works for you,but you have to have a number in
(31:06):
order to make it work for you.
Mm-hmm.
Yeah.
Yeah.
And I just, my whole episodelast week was all about changing
traditions in weddings.
Mm-hmm.
So like, I think we'redefinitely in that era too, as
far as mm-hmm.
Like, kinda like you've beensaying, tradition can be
important and it has its place,but that doesn't mean you have
to do it.
So, yeah.
(31:27):
It's only if it's important toyou.
Mm-hmm.
Right.
And.
Just following up on that secondquestion.
Mm-hmm.
Do you feel like there is adifference at all when you're
working with a straight coupleversus an LGBTQ couple?
Or is it pretty similar?
It's generally pretty simple.
Similar, I would say.
(31:47):
Um, there's definitely likecertain questions I ask LGBTQ
couples that I don't necessarilyask my straight couples.
Like, you know, is there some,are we like out, are we okay
with all the family?
Like how did that go?
Unfortunately, there's a lot of,a lot of safety questions that I
(32:07):
have to ask, um, because I wannamake sure that they're protected
as well.
Um, I mean, and I do ask mystraight couples like, you know,
is there any family drama I needto know about all that kind of
stuff.
Um, but it feels a little bitmore personal with my, um, my
career couples for sure.
Mm-hmm.
But as far as the actual likeplanning process goes, it tends
(32:28):
to be pretty much the same.
There's, you know, definitely adifferent of language in there.
Like, you know, do you bothwanna be called brides or is
there a different name you'dlike to go by?
Um, I tend to stick with like,you know, team so-and-so, and
team so-and-so and sobridesmaids and groomsman.
Mm-hmm.
(32:48):
Um, things like that, just tomake sure that everyone is
feeling inclusive.
And I do that with my straightcouples as well.
But you definitely like, reallywanna make sure you're doing
that with, with more inclusivecouple.
Yeah.
Oh, that's super cute.
I've never heard the team thingbefore.
I love that.
Yeah.
Yeah.
Makes it feel like they're allrooting for them instead too.
I know, right?
It's super cute.
(33:09):
Oh great.
It gets confusing every once ina while.
Cause I did have, um, I hadAmber and Laura once a few years
ago, and my name is Amber and myassistant's name was Laura.
So we had Amber and Team Laura,but then we just decided to mess
with them.
So I only hung out with TeamLaura and she only hung out with
(33:30):
Team Amber.
It was very fun.
Oh my gosh.
And you're like, we'll just bothget married today too.
You know, like, what if I, whatif I did the first look instead
of the other Amber?
Oh my gosh.
That's so funny.
Yeah, it was funny.
That's, that's encouraging tohear though.
While you are, you know, workingwith those couples and
(33:51):
acknowledging their differences,it's also not like, okay, we
have to go through somethingentirely different.
So, right.
Yeah.
I mean, ultimately a wedding isa wedding breaking tradition
aside, you know, they're,they're pretty standard
sometimes for the most part.
Um, so it's a lot of the samelike, okay, are you gonna do
(34:11):
first look or are you not gonnado first look.
Mm-hmm.
Right.
Yeah.
Right.
So I feel like I already kind ofknow the answer to this, but
mm-hmm.
Do you support Leave No Trace?
Yeah.
And how, how do you usuallyrecommend couples to easily
incorporate that into their,like, small wedding or alone
(34:33):
day?
Yeah.
Um, I, I mean, I obviouslydefinitely support it.
The best way I've seen it doneis something like, uh, going on
a hiking trail to like aspecific location to elope or
something like that.
Um, and I tend to just say leantowards whatever the hikers are
doing.
Um, If you're, if you're gettinggoing to elope somewhere on a
(34:57):
mountaintop or at the Badlandsor something like that, you more
than likely are doing thatbecause it's a place you love
and it's cuz you enjoy hikingand you enjoy camping and all
that stuff.
So most of the time when I meetthose couples, they already have
a lot of that knowledge on, onhow to do it.
Um, but you know, it's a lot ofwhat comes in with you goes out
with you Don't leave trashbehind.
(35:18):
Especially being from thePacific Northwest for a long
time.
Just don't light any fires.
Just no fires, no campfires, noe-cigarettes.
Just don't, just don't do it.
Mm-hmm.
No gender reveal parties thatliterally set off one of the
wildfires a couple years ago.
Oh my gosh.
That was terrible.
Yeah.
Um, and then just like standardpractice for when I go hiking,
(35:40):
um, is I always carry trash bagsin my.
In my backpack.
So anytime I see someone else'strash, I just take it with me.
Um, and then just not bring amuch of stuff like mm-hmm.
You don't need to bring anentire picnic basket up there.
Like go have dinner at arestaurant somewhere else after.
You don't need to like, bring abig arch.
(36:02):
You're in nature.
Nature is your arch.
Yes.
Redoing yes.
And also you have to carry it.
So that would suck.
Exactly.
I think that kind of eliminatesa lot of what you'd typically
leave behind at a wedding, justcuz you're gonna carry it up the
mountain if you wanna have it.
(36:23):
Ooh, that's an interestingquestion to ask your traditional
wedding couples, if you can'tcarry it.
Who you're wanting and like, doyou really need it?
You really need it.
Do you need that extra fluffycouch behind you?
Only if it's going in yourliving room afterwards.
Yeah.
So true.
Yeah.
(36:43):
That's great.
The harder leave no trace iswhen you get into like
destination elopement, like whatI did in Costa Rica.
Um, and a lot of what we didwith that was lean on the people
that were there, lean on thelocals to kind of know what
exactly they should do.
I had a wedding planner throughthe resort that we got married
at.
(37:03):
Um, and they basically are like,here's your options.
Like here's our, here's our oneflorist, here's our one
photographer.
Um, and I, I know a lot ofpeople get frustrated with that
just because, especially in thestates, you're used to options
used to just like pick andchoose your photographer's vibe
and your florist and get amockup bouquet and all that
jazz.
And it's like, well, you don'thave those options.
(37:25):
And.
Important to understand thatlike, these are their locals,
this is their team, they'regonna know what's best.
And to really, I mean, this kindof goes in general for weddings,
but really try to trust yourvendors and trust the people
that you're working with, um,because they're ultimately gonna
give you the best experience.
Mm-hmm.
Mm-hmm.
(37:45):
And so a lot of that was like,we didn't do, you know, any
non-indigenous flowers to CostaRica?
Um, we got married on the beach,but it was a public beach, so,
you know, people are walking byand you just, you're just okay
with it.
At one point we got a photo witha very drunk Italian man, um,
who was very sweet and, and didgive us a hundred dollars.
(38:09):
He walked by and he's like thistiny little speedo.
He was very sweet.
I mean, hey, I would do that tooif I got hundred dollars.
Well, in Costa Rica is very,it's very, very community based.
Like weddings are a pretty bigthing.
So like, you know, some localsjust like joined in the dance
party and it's like that.
(38:30):
That's just, that's how it is.
So you have to like make sureyou understand like local
customs and local cultures.
And I know a lot of people allin Hawaii and there's a lot of
questionable things that.
That are made as far as choicesin Hawaii.
Um, so I think really being ableto reach out to somebody local
and if, if, if Hawaii's like,you must do it.
(38:54):
I'm sure they wouldn't mind thetourist funds, but also like,
make sure you're.
Working with people that aregonna point you in the right
direction and not necessarilyjust like, give all your monies
to a Sandals resort.
Ooh, yeah.
Yeah, for sure.
Yeah.
Yeah.
Being intentional.
I think it's a, that's a commontheme.
(39:14):
It is.
Yeah.
I think that's the, the bigcutarching one is, is really
intentionality.
Mm-hmm.
Yeah.
And just touching on what yousaid earlier, um, About like
vendors, you know, knowing bestand stuff like that.
I think that's just kind of alsoanother huge piece of advice
for, for this too, is makingsure that you are picking
(39:37):
vendors who like, you know, Arenot just like saying yes to you
because it like you happen to beopen, but who are like
emphatically like, yes, I standwith you, I support you.
Mm-hmm.
I believe in you and I haveexperience here.
Like yeah.
Yeah.
There's definitely a lot ofgreenwashing and.
Rainbow washing, for lack ofbetter term, out there in the
(39:59):
world.
Yeah.
Like interview people, likegenuinely get on, you know, a
call like this and actually talkto a person.
Mm-hmm.
Because, you know, emailing youcan only get so much from how a
person actually is and what,what they actually stand for.
And I think a, a good positivething I'm seeing is a lot of
vendors on online are reallybeing open about like, I, I,
(40:21):
this is what I think about thisparticular subject, you know,
not shying away from like hardpolitical topics and things like
that.
Mm-hmm.
Mm-hmm.
When you come, when you come tome, it's like, you know, you
know, my values already for themost part.
Mm-hmm.
Right.
Yeah.
Super.
Great.
Well, my last question, I know,I know.
(40:44):
Yeah.
But I, I do think that is likea, a common thing now too, is.
People being more open, um,hopefully for the better.
So yeah, I was gonna say forbetter or worse, but at least,
at least you know what you'regetting yourself into before,
before you jump in, right?
Yep, exactly.
Well, to kind of wrap this allup, um, you know, specific
(41:08):
couples or scenarios aside, likemm-hmm.
What would you say is your bestcutall advice to any couple who
might be planning right.
Um, I think if y'all didn'tcatch it already from this
conversation, but be intentionalabout your choices, really.
Like, take the time to considerwhat the two of you actually
really want.
(41:29):
Um, and make compromises onlywhere it makes sense to you.
Hmm.
I love that.
I love that.
That's going to be like, that'sthe line of the, that's my
tagline.
Yes.
Okay.
So with every guest I have onhere, I always like to do just
like a fun little lightninground.
(41:52):
Not the, the things we haven'tbeen talking about, haven't been
fun, but, you know, um, just tohelp us end on a really fun note
and help everyone get to knowyou.
So, are you ready?
I'm ready.
Okay, great.
What would be your absolutefavorite way to spend a day?
(42:12):
Lately, so I have a, a sunroomon my, my house is 120 years old
and I have this little sunroom,and when it is hot in the
summer, I've been sitting outthere doing a little hot yoga in
the morning and making myself alittle hot yoga studio and then
having a coffee and thensnuggling with my cats.
Hmm.
That's beautiful.
(42:33):
Yeah.
It's where do make the most outof the heat.
Yeah.
Yeah.
I mean, it gets hot in there.
It like, it is a hot yoga studionaturally too, like yeah.
Wow.
We love it.
Um, not too much in the winter.
Oh yeah.
Yeah, then it's a cold studio.
Then it's more of an ice bathsituation.
(42:55):
Has health benefits too.
You know?
It does.
Which, yeah.
Speaking of, what do you missmost about Minnesota and what's
your favorite thing about thePacific Northwest?
Now, the thing I think I'vemissed the most about Minnesota
is the people, which I know iskind of like a sideline answer,
but, The Minnesota nice is veryreal and you don't realize how
(43:18):
real it is until you leave.
Where like in Pacific Northwest,there's this thing called the
Seattle Freeze where it's justlike, you know, if you're
walking down the street inMinnesota, like someone will say
hi to you and you just like sayhi back and you smile and it's
like kind of a nice littleinteraction, not a thing.
In the Pacific Northwest,everyone looks like 20 feet away
from each other.
You don't even look at eachother.
(43:40):
I, I definitely found it waslike a little harder to make
friends out there just to likekind of break through the ice a
little bit.
But yeah, I miss Minnesotapeople.
Pacific Northwest is thelandscape and the weather.
Mm, mm-hmm.
Yeah, it's, it's nice to be ableto like look out your window and
see the ocean and also mountainsat the same time.
(44:01):
Yeah, that's pretty hard tocompete with it.
Yeah.
And you know, it doesn't getbelow like 50 degrees.
Oh, that's super nice.
Although there was a bunch ofsnow there.
Not a bunch.
There was some snow there.
Yeah.
The last couple years there'sbeen snow like every Christmas,
but then it like goes awaywithin a couple weeks.
Okay.
Yeah.
So sounds like festival worlds.
(44:21):
Yeah.
Little bit.
Yeah.
Except there's so many.
That.
Mm-hmm.
Like this whole city shuts down.
Cause there's no way you can getup a hill or down a hill without
big accidents happening.
Yeah.
Oh my God.
I can't imagine.
Ooh, one of my friends liveslike basically in the mountains
and she sent me a video of herand her son sledding down their
(44:45):
driveway.
Oh my gosh.
There was so much ice.
That's great.
Yeah.
Wow.
All right.
And what is your favorite colorof the rainbow?
If you had asked me a coupleyears ago, I would've said red,
but lately I've been leaningreally hard into green.
Hmm.
(45:07):
Kind of goes well with the wholenature.
Yeah.
Glacier kinda, yeah.
Yeah.
It might be because I missed theamount of green that's in the
Pacific Northwest when it'slittle out here.
Mm-hmm.
Oh my gosh.
Yeah.
It's terrible here right now,but soon.
Soon it will be spring.
Yes, exactly.
Well, thank you Amber, so muchfor your time, for your
(45:29):
knowledge, for your awesometips.
Um, we really appreciate you andif any of you are thinking about
getting married out in.
Either the Pacific Northwest orSouth Dakota.
Uh, you can find Amber atGlacier Weddings and events on
Instagram.
So, yeah.
Is there anything else you wannasay to the listeners before we
(45:52):
sign out?
Huh?
No, this is a, this is great andyou should do the, like you
subscribe E Brady things,however we do that on, on the
podcast.
Yes, exactly what she said.
Yes, yes.
All right.
Clearly beloved, we'll see youhere next week.
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