July 15, 2025 • 21 mins
What does it really mean to live a bold, adventurous life — one you can look back on with pride? In this episode, I share a conversation I had with my daughter that stopped me in my tracks. Her simple comment reminded me of something powerful: living boldly isn’t about being fearless — it’s about taking intentional action toward what lights you up, even when life is messy or uncertain.
Whether you’re feeling stuck, burned out, or just… meh — this episode will inspire you to reconnect with your inner fire and take the next brave step toward the life you actually want.
In this episode, you’ll hear:
- The story behind the moment my daughter called me a “cool person”
- Why living boldly doesn’t require a total life overhaul
- How to know if you're stuck in "small living" mode
- Practical tips to start living with more courage, joy, and adventure
- Journal prompts and reflection questions to help you get clear on what your bold life looks like
Resources & Links:
- Complete Lifestyle & Wellness Reset - check it out at kortneyrivard.com
- Free Quiz: What’s Really Holding You Back from Healthy Habits?
- Connect with me on Instagram → @kortney.a.rivard
- Learn more at kortneyrivard.com
Want more?
For more information about the podcast, visit www.realbraveunstoppable.com. To learn more about your host, Kortney Rivard, visit www.kortneyrivard.com
Follow Kortney on Social media:
Instagram
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Transcript
Episode Transcript
Available transcripts are automatically generated. Complete accuracy is not guaranteed.
(00:02):
Hello friends, and welcome backto the podcast for episode
number 131.
Today I'm going to share withyou a little bit of wisdom and
experience that I hope willinspire you to live a big life
on your terms.
So I have a story to starttoday's episode off with.
The other day my daughter and Iwere talking about something,
(00:25):
can't even remember what it was,but something that I once did a
long time ago that impressed herapparently.
She paused and looked at me withthis interesting expression,
it's hard to explain, kind oflike a quiet sense of admiration
or something like that.
And she said, you're a reallycool person.
I was completely taken aback bythis because I don't think that
(00:48):
it's that frequent, that 15 yearolds call their parents cool.
But hey, I'll take it.
So I paused.
I kind of chuckled and I askedher what she meant by that, and
she said, you've done so manythings.
Aw, my mama heart melted alittle bit here because a, a
15-year-old just called her momcool.
(01:11):
And B, this is something that Ilove about myself.
I'm adventurous.
If something interests me, Ijust, I find a way to try it.
I've done everything fromgetting my private pilot's
license to doing a solobackpacking trip in the Colorado
wilderness to paddle boarding,doing half Ironman triathlons.
I've been an engineer, a salesrep, a personal trainer, a
(01:34):
photographer, a coach.
There aren't a lot of thingsthat stand in my way of trying
something, so to have my teenagedaughter notice and seemingly
admire my adventurous spirit,Which I'm so proud of, and also
willingness to really jump intothings- One of the things that I
love most about myself that wasreally special.
(01:55):
I often have people tell me thatthey admire this in me and that
they could never do what I do,and I'm often really surprised
by that because my first thoughtis, well, you could do it too.
I usually say this, and I don'tknow that A lot of people I talk
to Really believe this, but,like it's true, you can, if it's
(02:16):
something that you wanna do,it's important to you, you find
a way to do it.
And I'm not always doing thingsthat feel big and bold, mind
you.
But I do enjoy some of this inmy life.
And not everybody's idea of abig, bold life is the same as
mine.
But today I want you to thinkabout what makes you unique and
what a big, bold life looks liketo you.
(02:37):
So we're gonna talk about that.
So what does living a big, boldlife mean to you?
Well, I'll be the first to saythat it's not just about like
skydiving or, which I have nointerest in doing by the way, or
epic adventures.
It's about fully engaging withyour passions and curiosity no
(02:57):
matter what the scale is.
A big life, it looks differentfor everyone, but at the core, I
think big lives are reallygrounded in being intentional.
Intentional, courageous, actiontowards what lights you up.
For those of you who have beenpaying attention to my, my
podcast, we're talking about ourthird pillar of wellness here,
(03:19):
which is spirit.
What brings you meaning andpurpose in your life?
What?
What's that?
Taking intentional, courageousaction to align with what's
important to us or our values.
So some examples of this.
Maybe it's saying yes to a newadventure.
It could be like I mentioned,solo backpacking, even though it
(03:41):
feels really intimidating orsolo travel.
I'm going on a trip to Europe atthe beginning of August by
myself.
It could be trying a new sport,a dance or physical activity
that challenges your body,challenges your mindset.
It could even just be booking aspontaneous weekend getaway to a
place you've never been.
It could be pursuing a passionproject, maybe starting a
(04:02):
creative hobby like painting orwriting or music, and committing
some time to that regularly.
Maybe it's launching a sidebusiness or a podcast that
shares your unique voice orexpertise.
We all have that.
I guarantee every one of youcould start a podcast about
something.
It could be, volunteering for acause that you care really
(04:25):
deeply about, even if it meansrearranging your schedule.
could be making a big lifechange, which could include
changing careers to align withyour values and passions even
though it's uncertain or movingto a new city or a new country
to explore new cultures andopportunities.
Or it could be ending a toxicrelationship or a friendship
(04:46):
that no longer serves yourwellbeing.
And remember, big life issubjective.
The idea here is that we're notjust staying small in our
comfort zone all the time.
Challenging yourself physicallyand mentally.
Training for a marathon, atriathlon, or hiking a
challenging trail.
Honoring your body's strengthand resilience.
(05:08):
Could be committing to dailymindfulness or meditation
practice to grow mental clarityand emotional courage.
It could be taking a publicspeaking course to overcome fear
and share your story.
It could be cultivating a deeperconnection to self.
That could mean carving outregular solo time for
reflection, journaling, ornature walks to listen to your
(05:31):
inner voice, which is hard tohear a lot of the time.
Could be setting boundaries toprotect your energy and
prioritize what truly matters toyou.
That can feel bold sometimes.
It can be saying no toobligations or distractions that
pull you away from your purpose.
Also, can feel bold sometimesand hard.
(05:51):
Everyday acts of courage- thatcould be speaking up
authentically in conversations,even when it feels vulnerable or
expressing your true feelings orneeds with loved ones.
Maybe it's just trying a newrecipe, learning a language, or
simply changing your dailyroutine to break out of
autopilot.
And these count as bold becausethey require intention.
(06:12):
You're consciously choosingaction rather than staying
stuck.
These things take courage.
Fear, doubt, or discomfort.
You might feel those things, butyou move forward anyway.
They're bold because theyreflect what lights you up, your
unique passions, values, anddreams.
The point is, like I saidearlier, we're growing.
(06:34):
We're not staying small andletting our gifts go to waste.
Even small actions that arealigned for us are big and bold.
So I like to tie everything backto these three pillars of
wellness that I talk so muchabout because remember, they all
work together.
So taking steps to connect withwhat's important to us and
taking bold action, likewhatever that looks like for us
(06:57):
uniquely, that's part of ouroverall wellness, and it impacts
our ability to enjoy life.
So let's tie in all the pillars.
Okay.
So the body (07:06):
having physical strength and energy builds the
foundation to explore and takeaction.
The mind (07:14):
mental clarity, resilience and mindset shape,
how we approach challenges andopportunities.
It's how we deal with fear,negative self-talk and all of
that good stuff.
And then the third pillar,spirit or self, the connection
to our true selves.
That spark, that drives passionand purpose.
We need to take care of ourphysical body because it's the
(07:35):
foundation.
It's the container that allowsour being to experience the
things we love about our life.
So we often take that one forgranted, but we need to be well
rested, hydrated, fueled to dothe things we love and enjoy
them.
Similarly, we need our mind ingood shape.
(07:57):
And a lot of keeping thephysical body running
contributes to finding mentalclarity, resilience, and a
positive growth mindset, by theway.
And it's this pillar of the mindthat shapes how we approach
challenges and opportunities.
And finally, the spirit ourself,the connection to ourselves that
we're talking about today.
(08:17):
So why does action matter?
Well, the magic happens when twothings meet.
Curiosity meet courage.
Curiosity, is the inquisitiveinterest in others' concerns,
and that interest leads toinquiry, to questions, to asking
for more information.
(08:38):
And courage is the mental ormoral strength to venture,
persevere, and withstand danger,fear, or difficulty.
That's from Merriam Webster.
So with courage, we might feelafraid, but we do the thing
anyway.
And so when curiosity andcourage meet this is when you
actually do the thing thatinterests you.
However, this isn't to say thatour mind doesn't sometimes get
(09:00):
in the way, right?
People face all kinds ofroadblocks.
I mentioned fear, so our braintells us that we might fail.
Or what if we look stupid?
I don't know how, what ifs.
We have doubt.
I don't know if I can, what ifI'm not good at it?
We might have overwhelm.
It's too complicated.
I can't learn that.
That's not something that peoplelike me do.
(09:22):
So these are all stories that wehave in our head and all forms
of fear really.
Someone said to me the otherday, I can't remember who or
what the context even was, butthey were telling a story where
at one point they askedthemselves, if I wasn't afraid,
what would I do?
That's a brilliant question.
This question, helps us teaseout those stories that keep us
(09:43):
from acting.
Those stories are usually yourbrain protecting you from
something, like failing orlooking stupid, things like
that, but we don't always needthe protection it offers.
Because it does keep us kind ofsmall in our comfort zone, not
growing.
You don't need to be perfect orhave it all figured out to take
action towards something thatlights you up or interests you.
(10:06):
You just need to take one smallstep.
What that step looks likedepends on you, but a small step
is better than no steps.
So I'm gonna share some examplesfrom my life of things where
I've done something for me, bigand bold.
Again, these are things thatmight not resonate for you, and
(10:27):
you might think about things ona, a different level.
I love adventure.
So one of the things, one of theexamples I have is solo
backpacking.
This was a really, I, I justkind of decided to do it.
Was I afraid, uh, I wasn'treally afraid.
I was maybe nervous is theright.
Maybe a better word.
(10:48):
And there are times, there weretimes where I might've had a
little fear.
I can think of two times duringthat trip, but this trip, it
aligned with my values ofadventure, courage, and freedom.
It was a scary endeavor.
So, like I said, at times I feltnervous to do this by myself and
like the idea of it was scaryand a lot of people thought I
(11:11):
was crazy.
But physically my body wasstrong.
I was prepared.
I took that worry out of theequation and, and I was un, it
was unknown how I was gonnahandle the altitude, but like,
that was unknown.
I couldn't control that, right?
So I let that go.
I worked with my mind on thatone.
So also mentally I tackled thisby just learning what I needed
(11:34):
to learn.
So I was prepared and then like,I just managed that fear.
I made space for that fear.
I did a couple times feel like Ifelt a little nervous.
Like there was one night where Ithought there might be a bear
outside my tent.
I was a little scary.
And then there was one my lastday.
I was walking, I was by myselfand there, I didn't see any
(11:54):
people on the trail at all, andI was worried about seeing a
moose or a bear.
It was very quiet out.
So my mind was like, you know,running a little wild, had to
manage that.
Something else I've done in mylife was get my pilot's license.
So this is something like, Ijust, I believed I could do it.
It wasn't, there wasn't really aquestion.
(12:16):
Was I ever nervous or scared?
I'm sure it was a long time ago,so I don't remember exactly.
But I just like, I had thebelief and I had the desire and
so I did it.
I'm going on a solo trip toEurope in a couple weeks, this
one, yeah.
So this one's upcoming.
Um, am I a little nervous?
Uh, sure.
I'd be, be lying if I said notat all.
(12:36):
But I'm excited and I know thatI'm good at going with the flow
and traveling, and I know thatthe best laid plans often don't
go accordingly, so I just managemy mind around the nervousness
and know that all I can do ishandle these situations in the
moment the best I can.
I focus on what I can control,and I also remind myself that I
(12:57):
have a lot of resources and I amresourceful.
So another thing is when I didtriathlons and I also did a
marathon once, lots of halfmarathons, but this one is
definitely a physical pillar,but it's also a highly mental
one.
My favorite races weretriathlons and they lasted at
the time when I was doing themabout like five and a half-ish
(13:18):
hours.
If I was to do that same racenow, it'd probably take me at
least six hours, but it took alot of dedication to train for
that race.
Those races and complete itaccording to the goals I set.
And there were races where Ididn't know how I was gonna
finish.
I was like, did not feel well.
It was hot running.
But I, like, I dug really deepand reminded myself like,
(13:41):
Courtney, you're a badass.
You can do this.
Right.
Life coaching certification,like I've told this story a lot
of times, but when I decided tobecome a coach, like I didn't
really have a lot of money and Ididn't know how I was gonna.
I was like, I don't know howI'll find this, but I need to do
something.
My ex had removed my access tofunds and since we didn't have
an agreement at the financialagreement at that point, he just
(14:04):
decided how much money he wasgonna give me, every month.
And I.
Here.
I just, I leaned on my mind andspirit pillars.
I knew it was important to havea career that I felt good about,
and I didn't really wanna goback to being an engineer at the
time.
I wanted a career that helped meconnect with my values.
I chose this path because it, itdid connect with those values.
(14:26):
I also really had to manage andtake care of my mind because
there were a lot of, I don'tknow hows and what if I can't.
I had a coach that helped me,work with those that was
helpful.
I also, a long time ago, starteda photography business, um, from
scratch and I built it into areally profitable endeavor that
really did well back in the day,before everyone had a digital
(14:48):
camera.
I don't do as much of that thesedays, but.
But yeah, I, again, like I, wellactually the motivation behind
the photography business was Iwanted to buy a horse and I knew
that my ex-husband would notapprove if we didn't have like,
another source of income.
They're very expensive.
So, that was my motivation.
So I think the thing I reallywanted was, this was kind of a
(15:10):
twofold thing.
I really wanted to, to be ridingfirst of all.
And then the second part was,how am I gonna get this done?
How am I gonna accomplish this?
Well, I'll do that.
I'll start a business.
So the last, the last one I'mgonna share, and this is like
something that's not like a hugething, like the rest of'em I've
shared are kind of like biggerendeavors.
(15:32):
But this one was when I was incollege, I actually asked this
guy out on a date.
He was really cute and I, I hadtalked to him a couple times in
the computer lab...
and so I worked up the courageto ask him if he wanted to, you
know, meet up, meet up sometime,and, um.
It was so embarrassing.
He had a girlfriend and he waslike really nice about it, but I
(15:54):
felt, I felt really dumb.
But at the same time, like thatwas something, you know, big and
bold for me at the time.
In all of these cases though,like my sense of self or really
the belief that I can doanything I put my mind to, like
really fueled me.
And I think that's reallycritical.
We don't always feel like we'remaking progress or crushing it,
but we know that we can get towhere we want to be if we try.
(16:19):
Now, there's a caveat here.
This does not mean that we can'tdecide later that something
isn't serving us anymore.
That's not giving up.
It's just, I don't wanna do thisanymore.
So to wrap up today's episode,I'd love it for you to reflect
on your big, bold life.
Keeping in mind that this doesnot have to include anything big
(16:41):
and quote unquote epic.
It can be just normal life, likewhat lights you up?
What have you been curious aboutbut haven't tried?
For me, I have a few things.
Archery, karate.
I'm sure there's a ton of otherthings too.
And there are things that I havehad the, the guts to try, like
doing a trapeze class.
(17:03):
Not for me, won't do it again.
I did learn there that I'm notan adrenaline junkie.
Also what small action can youtake this week to live even just
a little bit bigger?
So we, we all have our ownversions of adventure and
boldness.
What's yours?
Think about that.
(17:23):
So, living a big life, whichreally I could be labeling as an
authentic life because yourdefinition of a big life is
uniquely you, but it's a giftyou give yourself and those
around you.
So you get to find ways tocultivate purpose and meaning in
your life, and you also mightreally inspire someone.
(17:44):
Maybe your kid will tell youyou're cool.
My daughter's words made me feelso good, not just because she's
a teenager and it's not everyday you get the message, Hey
mom, you're cool.
It's because her words weren'tabout the cool achievements I've
accomplished.
It was about me showing up fullyand authentically.
Authenticity is a value of mineand it's really affirming to
(18:07):
know that someone else noticesthat that's part of who I am.
So what does your big, bold,authentic life look like?
I invite you to think about thisand take some action.
If you find yourself afraid totake some of these steps, ask
yourself, one of my now favoritequestions, what would I do?
Or What would my life look likeif I weren't afraid?
(18:29):
It doesn't mean that you won'tbe afraid or that it's not okay
to be afraid.
Because that's just expectedsometimes, right?
So then, you know, like I canmanage fear, so I could still do
that.
So one more thing.
As I was preparing this episode,I had the thought, wouldn't it
be fun to know what things myaudience went and tried after
(18:51):
listening?
Wouldn't it be fun to know someof the actions that were taken?
Yes, it would be fun.
So friends, I would love, love,love it if you would participate
in the"I just did it" Challenge.
Here's the deal.
Take action towards somethingthat feels like it's calling to
you.
Post on social media, tag me,share about your action.
(19:15):
What was it?
Tell me all about it.
And also add the hashtag, I justdid it.
Okay, and you can find me onInstagram.
My handle is kortneyarivard.
So I hope you'll join the funand participate.
I think this would be reallycool.
So please do it.
Alright my friends.
(19:36):
It was really good to have youhere today.
If you're enjoying the show,please help a girl out and leave
a rating and a review on yourfavorite streaming platform.
That's super helpful.
I appreciate you.
Until next time.
Hello friends, and welcome backto the podcast for episode
number 131.
Today I'm going to share withyou a little bit of wisdom and
experience that I hope willinspire you to live a big life
on your terms.
So I have a story to starttoday's episode off with.
The other day my daughter and Iwere talking about something,
(00:25):
can't even remember what it was,but something that I once did a
long time ago that impressed herapparently.
She paused and looked at me withthis interesting expression,
it's hard to explain, kind oflike a quiet sense of admiration
or something like that.
And she said, you're a reallycool person.
I was completely taken aback bythis because I don't think that
(00:48):
it's that frequent, that 15 yearolds call their parents cool.
But hey, I'll take it.
So I paused.
I kind of chuckled and I askedher what she meant by that, and
she said, you've done so manythings.
Aw, my mama heart melted alittle bit here because a, a
15-year-old just called her momcool.
(01:11):
And B, this is something that Ilove about myself.
I'm adventurous.
If something interests me, Ijust, I find a way to try it.
I've done everything fromgetting my private pilot's
license to doing a solobackpacking trip in the Colorado
wilderness to paddle boarding,doing half Ironman triathlons.
I've been an engineer, a salesrep, a personal trainer, a
(01:34):
photographer, a coach.
There aren't a lot of thingsthat stand in my way of trying
something, so to have my teenagedaughter notice and seemingly
admire my adventurous spirit,Which I'm so proud of, and also
willingness to really jump intothings- One of the things that I
love most about myself that wasreally special.
(01:55):
I often have people tell me thatthey admire this in me and that
they could never do what I do,and I'm often really surprised
by that because my first thoughtis, well, you could do it too.
I usually say this, and I don'tknow that A lot of people I talk
to Really believe this, but,like it's true, you can, if it's
(02:16):
something that you wanna do,it's important to you, you find
a way to do it.
And I'm not always doing thingsthat feel big and bold, mind
you.
But I do enjoy some of this inmy life.
And not everybody's idea of abig, bold life is the same as
mine.
But today I want you to thinkabout what makes you unique and
what a big, bold life looks liketo you.
(02:37):
So we're gonna talk about that.
So what does living a big, boldlife mean to you?
Well, I'll be the first to saythat it's not just about like
skydiving or, which I have nointerest in doing by the way, or
epic adventures.
It's about fully engaging withyour passions and curiosity no
(02:57):
matter what the scale is.
A big life, it looks differentfor everyone, but at the core, I
think big lives are reallygrounded in being intentional.
Intentional, courageous, actiontowards what lights you up.
For those of you who have beenpaying attention to my, my
podcast, we're talking about ourthird pillar of wellness here,
(03:19):
which is spirit.
What brings you meaning andpurpose in your life?
What?
What's that?
Taking intentional, courageousaction to align with what's
important to us or our values.
So some examples of this.
Maybe it's saying yes to a newadventure.
It could be like I mentioned,solo backpacking, even though it
(03:41):
feels really intimidating orsolo travel.
I'm going on a trip to Europe atthe beginning of August by
myself.
It could be trying a new sport,a dance or physical activity
that challenges your body,challenges your mindset.
It could even just be booking aspontaneous weekend getaway to a
place you've never been.
It could be pursuing a passionproject, maybe starting a
(04:02):
creative hobby like painting orwriting or music, and committing
some time to that regularly.
Maybe it's launching a sidebusiness or a podcast that
shares your unique voice orexpertise.
We all have that.
I guarantee every one of youcould start a podcast about
something.
It could be, volunteering for acause that you care really
(04:25):
deeply about, even if it meansrearranging your schedule.
could be making a big lifechange, which could include
changing careers to align withyour values and passions even
though it's uncertain or movingto a new city or a new country
to explore new cultures andopportunities.
Or it could be ending a toxicrelationship or a friendship
(04:46):
that no longer serves yourwellbeing.
And remember, big life issubjective.
The idea here is that we're notjust staying small in our
comfort zone all the time.
Challenging yourself physicallyand mentally.
Training for a marathon, atriathlon, or hiking a
challenging trail.
Honoring your body's strengthand resilience.
(05:08):
Could be committing to dailymindfulness or meditation
practice to grow mental clarityand emotional courage.
It could be taking a publicspeaking course to overcome fear
and share your story.
It could be cultivating a deeperconnection to self.
That could mean carving outregular solo time for
reflection, journaling, ornature walks to listen to your
(05:31):
inner voice, which is hard tohear a lot of the time.
Could be setting boundaries toprotect your energy and
prioritize what truly matters toyou.
That can feel bold sometimes.
It can be saying no toobligations or distractions that
pull you away from your purpose.
Also, can feel bold sometimesand hard.
(05:51):
Everyday acts of courage- thatcould be speaking up
authentically in conversations,even when it feels vulnerable or
expressing your true feelings orneeds with loved ones.
Maybe it's just trying a newrecipe, learning a language, or
simply changing your dailyroutine to break out of
autopilot.
And these count as bold becausethey require intention.
(06:12):
You're consciously choosingaction rather than staying
stuck.
These things take courage.
Fear, doubt, or discomfort.
You might feel those things, butyou move forward anyway.
They're bold because theyreflect what lights you up, your
unique passions, values, anddreams.
The point is, like I saidearlier, we're growing.
(06:34):
We're not staying small andletting our gifts go to waste.
Even small actions that arealigned for us are big and bold.
So I like to tie everything backto these three pillars of
wellness that I talk so muchabout because remember, they all
work together.
So taking steps to connect withwhat's important to us and
taking bold action, likewhatever that looks like for us
(06:57):
uniquely, that's part of ouroverall wellness, and it impacts
our ability to enjoy life.
So let's tie in all the pillars.
Okay.
So the body (07:06):
having physical strength and energy builds the
foundation to explore and takeaction.
The mind (07:14):
mental clarity, resilience and mindset shape,
how we approach challenges andopportunities.
It's how we deal with fear,negative self-talk and all of
that good stuff.
And then the third pillar,spirit or self, the connection
to our true selves.
That spark, that drives passionand purpose.
We need to take care of ourphysical body because it's the
(07:35):
foundation.
It's the container that allowsour being to experience the
things we love about our life.
So we often take that one forgranted, but we need to be well
rested, hydrated, fueled to dothe things we love and enjoy
them.
Similarly, we need our mind ingood shape.
(07:57):
And a lot of keeping thephysical body running
contributes to finding mentalclarity, resilience, and a
positive growth mindset, by theway.
And it's this pillar of the mindthat shapes how we approach
challenges and opportunities.
And finally, the spirit ourself,the connection to ourselves that
we're talking about today.
(08:17):
So why does action matter?
Well, the magic happens when twothings meet.
Curiosity meet courage.
Curiosity, is the inquisitiveinterest in others' concerns,
and that interest leads toinquiry, to questions, to asking
for more information.
(08:38):
And courage is the mental ormoral strength to venture,
persevere, and withstand danger,fear, or difficulty.
That's from Merriam Webster.
So with courage, we might feelafraid, but we do the thing
anyway.
And so when curiosity andcourage meet this is when you
actually do the thing thatinterests you.
However, this isn't to say thatour mind doesn't sometimes get
(09:00):
in the way, right?
People face all kinds ofroadblocks.
I mentioned fear, so our braintells us that we might fail.
Or what if we look stupid?
I don't know how, what ifs.
We have doubt.
I don't know if I can, what ifI'm not good at it?
We might have overwhelm.
It's too complicated.
I can't learn that.
That's not something that peoplelike me do.
(09:22):
So these are all stories that wehave in our head and all forms
of fear really.
Someone said to me the otherday, I can't remember who or
what the context even was, butthey were telling a story where
at one point they askedthemselves, if I wasn't afraid,
what would I do?
That's a brilliant question.
This question, helps us teaseout those stories that keep us
(09:43):
from acting.
Those stories are usually yourbrain protecting you from
something, like failing orlooking stupid, things like
that, but we don't always needthe protection it offers.
Because it does keep us kind ofsmall in our comfort zone, not
growing.
You don't need to be perfect orhave it all figured out to take
action towards something thatlights you up or interests you.
(10:06):
You just need to take one smallstep.
What that step looks likedepends on you, but a small step
is better than no steps.
So I'm gonna share some examplesfrom my life of things where
I've done something for me, bigand bold.
Again, these are things thatmight not resonate for you, and
(10:27):
you might think about things ona, a different level.
I love adventure.
So one of the things, one of theexamples I have is solo
backpacking.
This was a really, I, I justkind of decided to do it.
Was I afraid, uh, I wasn'treally afraid.
I was maybe nervous is theright.
Maybe a better word.
(10:48):
And there are times, there weretimes where I might've had a
little fear.
I can think of two times duringthat trip, but this trip, it
aligned with my values ofadventure, courage, and freedom.
It was a scary endeavor.
So, like I said, at times I feltnervous to do this by myself and
like the idea of it was scaryand a lot of people thought I
(11:11):
was crazy.
But physically my body wasstrong.
I was prepared.
I took that worry out of theequation and, and I was un, it
was unknown how I was gonnahandle the altitude, but like,
that was unknown.
I couldn't control that, right?
So I let that go.
I worked with my mind on thatone.
So also mentally I tackled thisby just learning what I needed
(11:34):
to learn.
So I was prepared and then like,I just managed that fear.
I made space for that fear.
I did a couple times feel like Ifelt a little nervous.
Like there was one night where Ithought there might be a bear
outside my tent.
I was a little scary.
And then there was one my lastday.
I was walking, I was by myselfand there, I didn't see any
(11:54):
people on the trail at all, andI was worried about seeing a
moose or a bear.
It was very quiet out.
So my mind was like, you know,running a little wild, had to
manage that.
Something else I've done in mylife was get my pilot's license.
So this is something like, Ijust, I believed I could do it.
It wasn't, there wasn't really aquestion.
(12:16):
Was I ever nervous or scared?
I'm sure it was a long time ago,so I don't remember exactly.
But I just like, I had thebelief and I had the desire and
so I did it.
I'm going on a solo trip toEurope in a couple weeks, this
one, yeah.
So this one's upcoming.
Um, am I a little nervous?
Uh, sure.
I'd be, be lying if I said notat all.
(12:36):
But I'm excited and I know thatI'm good at going with the flow
and traveling, and I know thatthe best laid plans often don't
go accordingly, so I just managemy mind around the nervousness
and know that all I can do ishandle these situations in the
moment the best I can.
I focus on what I can control,and I also remind myself that I
(12:57):
have a lot of resources and I amresourceful.
So another thing is when I didtriathlons and I also did a
marathon once, lots of halfmarathons, but this one is
definitely a physical pillar,but it's also a highly mental
one.
My favorite races weretriathlons and they lasted at
the time when I was doing themabout like five and a half-ish
(13:18):
hours.
If I was to do that same racenow, it'd probably take me at
least six hours, but it took alot of dedication to train for
that race.
Those races and complete itaccording to the goals I set.
And there were races where Ididn't know how I was gonna
finish.
I was like, did not feel well.
It was hot running.
But I, like, I dug really deepand reminded myself like,
(13:41):
Courtney, you're a badass.
You can do this.
Right.
Life coaching certification,like I've told this story a lot
of times, but when I decided tobecome a coach, like I didn't
really have a lot of money and Ididn't know how I was gonna.
I was like, I don't know howI'll find this, but I need to do
something.
My ex had removed my access tofunds and since we didn't have
an agreement at the financialagreement at that point, he just
(14:04):
decided how much money he wasgonna give me, every month.
And I.
Here.
I just, I leaned on my mind andspirit pillars.
I knew it was important to havea career that I felt good about,
and I didn't really wanna goback to being an engineer at the
time.
I wanted a career that helped meconnect with my values.
I chose this path because it, itdid connect with those values.
(14:26):
I also really had to manage andtake care of my mind because
there were a lot of, I don'tknow hows and what if I can't.
I had a coach that helped me,work with those that was
helpful.
I also, a long time ago, starteda photography business, um, from
scratch and I built it into areally profitable endeavor that
really did well back in the day,before everyone had a digital
(14:48):
camera.
I don't do as much of that thesedays, but.
But yeah, I, again, like I, wellactually the motivation behind
the photography business was Iwanted to buy a horse and I knew
that my ex-husband would notapprove if we didn't have like,
another source of income.
They're very expensive.
So, that was my motivation.
So I think the thing I reallywanted was, this was kind of a
(15:10):
twofold thing.
I really wanted to, to be ridingfirst of all.
And then the second part was,how am I gonna get this done?
How am I gonna accomplish this?
Well, I'll do that.
I'll start a business.
So the last, the last one I'mgonna share, and this is like
something that's not like a hugething, like the rest of'em I've
shared are kind of like biggerendeavors.
(15:32):
But this one was when I was incollege, I actually asked this
guy out on a date.
He was really cute and I, I hadtalked to him a couple times in
the computer lab...
and so I worked up the courageto ask him if he wanted to, you
know, meet up, meet up sometime,and, um.
It was so embarrassing.
He had a girlfriend and he waslike really nice about it, but I
(15:54):
felt, I felt really dumb.
But at the same time, like thatwas something, you know, big and
bold for me at the time.
In all of these cases though,like my sense of self or really
the belief that I can doanything I put my mind to, like
really fueled me.
And I think that's reallycritical.
We don't always feel like we'remaking progress or crushing it,
but we know that we can get towhere we want to be if we try.
(16:19):
Now, there's a caveat here.
This does not mean that we can'tdecide later that something
isn't serving us anymore.
That's not giving up.
It's just, I don't wanna do thisanymore.
So to wrap up today's episode,I'd love it for you to reflect
on your big, bold life.
Keeping in mind that this doesnot have to include anything big
(16:41):
and quote unquote epic.
It can be just normal life, likewhat lights you up?
What have you been curious aboutbut haven't tried?
For me, I have a few things.
Archery, karate.
I'm sure there's a ton of otherthings too.
And there are things that I havehad the, the guts to try, like
doing a trapeze class.
(17:03):
Not for me, won't do it again.
I did learn there that I'm notan adrenaline junkie.
Also what small action can youtake this week to live even just
a little bit bigger?
So we, we all have our ownversions of adventure and
boldness.
What's yours?
Think about that.
(17:23):
So, living a big life, whichreally I could be labeling as an
authentic life because yourdefinition of a big life is
uniquely you, but it's a giftyou give yourself and those
around you.
So you get to find ways tocultivate purpose and meaning in
your life, and you also mightreally inspire someone.
(17:44):
Maybe your kid will tell youyou're cool.
My daughter's words made me feelso good, not just because she's
a teenager and it's not everyday you get the message, Hey
mom, you're cool.
It's because her words weren'tabout the cool achievements I've
accomplished.
It was about me showing up fullyand authentically.
Authenticity is a value of mineand it's really affirming to
(18:07):
know that someone else noticesthat that's part of who I am.
So what does your big, bold,authentic life look like?
I invite you to think about thisand take some action.
If you find yourself afraid totake some of these steps, ask
yourself, one of my now favoritequestions, what would I do?
Or What would my life look likeif I weren't afraid?
(18:29):
It doesn't mean that you won'tbe afraid or that it's not okay
to be afraid.
Because that's just expectedsometimes, right?
So then, you know, like I canmanage fear, so I could still do
that.
So one more thing.
As I was preparing this episode,I had the thought, wouldn't it
be fun to know what things myaudience went and tried after
(18:51):
listening?
Wouldn't it be fun to know someof the actions that were taken?
Yes, it would be fun.
So friends, I would love, love,love it if you would participate
in the"I just did it" Challenge.
Here's the deal.
Take action towards somethingthat feels like it's calling to
you.
Post on social media, tag me,share about your action.
(19:15):
What was it?
Tell me all about it.
And also add the hashtag, I justdid it.
Okay, and you can find me onInstagram.
My handle is kortneyarivard.
So I hope you'll join the funand participate.
I think this would be reallycool.
So please do it.
Alright my friends.
(19:36):
It was really good to have youhere today.
If you're enjoying the show,please help a girl out and leave
a rating and a review on yourfavorite streaming platform.
That's super helpful.
I appreciate you.
Until next time.
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