May 23, 2025 • 33 mins
Exploring Men's Mental Health Through Poetry with Colton Van Baale
In this episode of Real Men Feel, host Andy Grant speaks with Colton Van Baale, known online for his impactful spoken word as Poetry by Colton. Colton shares his journey into poetry, sparked by a mix of personal trials and support from friends. They discuss his debut book, 'Let's Talk About It,' which delves into men's mental health in a raw and emotional manner.
Colton also reads powerful excerpts from his book and shares his thoughts on the importance of speaking up about mental struggles. The conversation touches on the significance of community, authenticity, and taking time for oneself.
00:00 Introduction: Breaking the Silence
00:24 Meet the Host: Andy Grant
00:37 Guest Introduction: Colton Van Baale
00:52 Colton's Poetry and Impact
01:21 Colton's Journey into Poetry
05:04 The Power of Sharing and Community
06:46 Reading 'Speak Up'
09:45 The Purpose of the Book
12:26 Colton's Personal Struggles and Support
14:39 Building a Supportive Community
16:41 Lessons from a Firefighter's Struggles
17:25 Personal Struggles and Relationship Challenges
17:44 The Impact of Health Issues
20:08 Sharing Poetry: 'Man in the Mirror'
23:19 The Brutal Honesty of the Book
24:41 The Importance of Therapy and Self-Care
28:01 Embracing Vulnerability and Seeking Support
29:15 Living in the Moment and Future Aspirations
31:05 Final Thoughts and Farewell
Connect with Colton
TikTok -- https://www.tiktok.com/@poetry.by.colton
Buy the book "Let's Talk About It" -- https://poetrybycolton.myshopify.com/
Resources
Metallica, The Unnamed Feeling -- https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=NTU6NLovI_Q
Man in the Mirror -- https://open.spotify.com/track/6pDpFbSnlnvIhxnOd2FzmJ?si=f30114fba6794e80
Connect with Andy and the Real Men Feel Podcast:
Book a Clarity Call with Andy and get clear on your goals, what's in your way, and what you can do about it at https://theandygrant.com/talk
Instagram | @realmenfeelshow & @theandygrant
Andy Grant Website | https://theandygrant.com for coaching, healing, and book info!
Real Men Feel Website | http://realmenfeel.org
RMF Facebook Group | http://realmenfeel.org/group
YouTube | https://youtube.com/realmenfeel
#RealMenFeel ep 354
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Transcript
Episode Transcript
Available transcripts are automatically generated. Complete accuracy is not guaranteed.
(00:00):
They tell us not to cry, not to feel, not to break.
They teach us the silence is strength, that swallowing pain
makes us man, that no one wants to hear us anyway.
So we don't speak. And we die in that silence.
Not all at once, not in some grand cinematic way, but piece
by piece, breath by breath, until we're nothing but the
(00:21):
ghosts of the boys we used to be.
Hello and welcome to Real Men Field.
I'm your host, author, coach andhealer, Andy Grant.
Please visit theandygrant.com tolearn more about me.
We have conversations that most men are not having, but that all
men and the women who love them can benefit from.
My guest today is Colton Ben Valley.
Colton, known online as Poetry by Colton, is a spoken word
(00:44):
poet, father, and the author of Let's Talk About It, a poetry
collection that dives head firstinto the realities of Ben's
mental health. Now if I say poetry and you say,
uh, this is something else entirely.
Colton's work is guttural and impactful and had me in tears
this very morning. Colton shares 2 poems from his
(01:06):
book, talks about the fire he finds himself in, what has
helped him the most, and what hewishes more men realized.
Let's do it. Hello Colton and welcome to Real
Men Feel. Hey, Andy Wodd Beer.
Thank you. You know, when, when you first
reached out to me, you, you havea book of poetry coming out
called Let's Talk about it. And I believe I told you like I
(01:30):
don't read the books of my guests.
I like to be like the listeners who probably haven't read it
either. But this morning I did skim it
and wow, I I'm, I'm not kidding,some of the titles alone we're
really stirring things up for me.
Things like I'm doing great and the night I almost didn't make
it and I did, I loved I read thefirst lie about the lie of
(01:54):
saying I'm fine and man, I had aa guttural impact to that and
other things that I looked at and I'm fine.
You you write about wanting to say that instead of saying I'm
fine. I'm terrified and have a very
emotional, impactful, resonant, great freaking work that this
(02:14):
this I, I am not a poet. When someone says I have a book
of poetry, I'm imagining, oh, rainbows and fairy dust and
things like that. And that is not this at all.
Not at all knows. Yeah, And what else caught me?
Oh, the thing that lives in me again, super powerful.
And it reminded me of a Metallica song that hits me so
(02:38):
hard I can't listen to it because I don't want to lose how
hard it hits me. But it's called the Unnamed
Feeling and it just. I'll share with you.
Check it out. It's like, whoa, like I just, I
just to make sure that was a song.
I played it like an hour and a half ago and I was in tears as I
was reading so much of your of your content too.
(02:58):
So the thing that lives in me, Iwant to touch on that piece,
Man, that was a tough one to write.
I took myself kind of out of thehuman perspective and wrote more
from the perspective of the thing that lives in me, that
tells me I'm not OK, that tells me I'm not good enough.
And the hatred that he has or that that being has him
(03:21):
personifying. It was a really difficult task,
but man, that one was it was a fun one to write and it really
that's my favorite piece. Was it really fun to write?
No, not at all. Not at all.
All right. Good.
Yeah. So what first got you into
poetry? Is this a a new experience or
(03:43):
something you've always done? Yeah, great question.
So it all started when I was about 1314 years old, actually
had dreams of being a rock star and I was in a band and did
pretty good with it. Actually travelled around a
little bit and wrote a lot of myown originals.
So that's where it started. Unfortunately lost my voice.
(04:06):
Will bid a time later due to an essential drummer spreading to
my vocal cords. And so I kept writing, but I
kind of went into into hiding with it.
I never shared what I wrote because it went from songs to
poetry and didn't want that to come across as, oh, he's a soft
guy, he writes poetry, you know what I mean?
(04:27):
Yeah, I, I pretty much do, yeah.Up until about February of this
year, I was hanging out with Buddy after a rough day, had a
couple too many and shared some poetry with him as if I was like
telling him my deepest darkest secret. 2 weeks later he drove
me into a poetry slim and I ended up winning the whole
(04:51):
thing. And that's just kind of ignited
what you see today. The book TikTok, it's gotten
pretty popular there and it's been a really cool.
Journey. Nice.
So from that first drunken shareand then winning the poetry
slam, what made you want to create this book and share it
(05:13):
with the world? You know, I wrote the poetry.
It's always just been for me, and it still is, if I'm being
honest. But I also saw that my
struggles, not necessarily the context of what I'm going
through specifically, but the emotional side of it, it's
universal and men are struggling.
(05:34):
And I mean, I always knew that, right?
We don't talk enough, blah, blah, blah.
But I didn't understand how manymen it truly was until I got on
in front of the public and was reading my poetry to him.
And I get in DMS talking about how how much I meant to him and
so on and so forth. And it just ignited a OK, I need
(05:56):
to get this in front of as many people as I can.
And did that bring up any sort of fears or hesitancy about this
project? Oh, this is terrifying.
It's absolutely terrifying. I'm putting my heart and my soul
on paper and bearing it for the world, you know?
But if I wanted to preach, you know, speak up.
(06:16):
Let's talk more. Let we're not alone.
I have to be the one to take thelead there and say, hey, guys,
look, I'm going through it. I'm not OK.
I'm still on the fire with you. What Just have a space where we
don't have to have that tough external feel on.
We can drop our owner for a little bit.
Yeah, yeah, that that's so important for Meant to have an
(06:38):
opportunity, a community, even just one solitary friendship
where, yeah, that the mask can fall away.
Yeah. Absolutely.
I did not give you a warning about this, but might you read a
poem of your choosing? Oh, I would love to give me your
false. So I do a lot of writing.
I've wrote about 180 pieces since February.
(07:02):
So I'll do one out of the book, though, just because that's what
we're here talking about. And probably in my opinion, the
most, most important piece in the entire book.
It's called Speak Up. They tell us not to cry, not to
feel, not to break. They teach us the silence is
(07:23):
strength, that swallowing pain makes us man, that no one wants
to hear us anyway, so we don't speak.
And we die in that silence. Not all at once, not in some
grand cinematic way, but piece by piece, breath by breath,
until we're nothing but the ghosts of the boys we used to
be. Because we're taught that
feelings are things to be buried, that struggle is
(07:46):
something to be suffered alone. That real men don't ask for
help. I'm sorry, but fuck that.
Strength is a silence. Strength is standing up and
saying I'm not OK. Strength is admitting that the
weight is too heavy, that your hands are shaking, that you
don't know how much longer you can hold on.
Strength is speaking even when your voice trembles, even when
(08:08):
the word stays like shame. Even when everything in you says
no one will understand. Because I promise you, someone
will. I've been there.
I've stared at the ceiling at 3:00 AM wondering if it would
hurt us to just disappear. I've felt the weight of the
world press against my ribs until I forgot how to breathe.
I've drowned in my own silence, and I refuse to do it again.
(08:31):
Too many men choose death over honesty.
Too many men would rather becomea memory than admit their pain
in that. That's a real fucking tragedy.
We lose brothers, fathers, friends because we're too afraid
to say I need help. So I'll say it first.
I need help. Some days I struggle.
Some days I don't know what the hell that I'm doing.
(08:53):
Some days I carry things too heavy for one man, but I speak
anyway. I speak because I refuse to be
another named etched into stone too soon.
I speak because I refuse to let the world convince me that
silence is the answer. And I'm begging you, speak with
me. Speak because your pain is real.
(09:13):
Speak because you're not alone. Speak because you deserve to be
heard. Let's take back what it means to
be strong. Let's make strength mean
brotherhood admission, a voice that refuses to be swallowed.
Because we're not alone. We never were.
But we have to speak up to hear each other.
So speak. Wow.
(09:37):
Yeah, there's nothing I can say about that.
I'm just going to let it be there and breathe, man.
Thank you. Who?
So I've heard you say that this book is not self help but it is
self truth. Could you expand what that
means? Absolutely.
You know, the truth is I can't pull anybody out of the fire.
I'm still sitting in the fire right there with them.
(10:00):
I'm struggling every day. So I wrote this book not not to
help. I hope it helps.
But it's more of a mirror reflection.
I want people to look, read it and say, see themselves in these
lines just so they realize, hey,somebody else feels the same way
(10:21):
I do. And the the book and skimming
through it, it's not only poetry, there are some other
like journaling prompts and suchin it as well.
Yeah. So I put those in there and I
was really hesitant on doing that, but I wanted to.
And at the end of the day, I decided to go through with it
because even if you don't journal, don't write, whatever
(10:42):
the case may be, there's something really powerful about
putting words on a page or even just saying stuff out loud.
So take it for what it's worth and read those.
Talk about it to yourself, to the mirror at 3:00 AM, or put it
on a page. It's either way.
(11:02):
Just it's a coping skill I use and I wanted to share it with
the rest with anybody who picks up this book.
And so the again, the book is let's talk about it.
When does it come out and how might people find it?
Yeah, absolutely. So it's it'll be out June 1st on
Amazon. I also have a web store that's I
(11:25):
can't remember the exact name ofthe website, believe it's just
poetry by Colton, but the link is in my bio on TikTok and I can
get that over to you as well. You ever write anything that's
upbeat, hopeful, grateful? I've been struggling with that,
to be totally honest, That's I've been pushing myself to kind
(11:49):
of get out of this funk where all I write is really
introspective and how I'm feeling.
I do have uplifting pieces. I have pieces about nostalgia.
You know, my pieces about my daughter always shine through,
right? That's the happiest part of my
life. So when I read those,
(12:12):
absolutely. But this is definitely my
territory because I'm very honest in what I what I write.
I'm not going to fluff things up.
If I don't feel something, I'm not going to write about it.
They mentioned a couple times that you're you're still in the
fire. Yeah.
What's burning you? It's a great question.
(12:36):
Honestly, it's, it's a drive. It's I feel like I'm not doing
enough, but at the same time I'mdoing so much that it's taken
away from my life. It's the fear, failure, fear,
success. It's the drive to even open up
my eyes and get out of bed in the morning.
It's building a career at the same time trying to finally be
(12:59):
in myself and putting this poetry out there.
It's an everyday struggle to whether I'm good enough or not
good enough or doing too much ornot enough.
It's constant back and forth andfor a lot of years I carried it
by myself and since I've starteddoing this, there's a whole
community of us out there now. It's been really good.
(13:21):
And has this challenge these doubts of being good enough and
worthy? Have these been around for a
long time? Most of my life for as long as I
can remember. To be honest, I had a rough
childhood. I'll call it what it is.
I and never really came out of those struggles.
I grew up, I learned how to carry it a little different
(13:41):
stir, but still still dealing with some of it to this day.
But we're getting through. Besides expressing yourself in
your poetry, in your spoken word, what other tools are are
helping you? Yeah, therapy, honestly, going
(14:02):
to therapy is huge. And just being around the right
people, I can't emphasize how important that is.
When you surround yourself with people who are negative in any
light, right? That can be family, that can be
friends, that can be anybody. When you they bring you down.
(14:23):
And when you surround yourself with people who lift you up, as
weird and simple as it sounds, it's so powerful.
And to that point now where I have this amazing community
around me and I've never felt better, to be honest, so.
What's this community? What?
What have you found? What have you made?
Yeah, so a bunch of us on it allstarted just kind of on TikTok.
(14:47):
We're doing TikTok lives and I host one where I bring people up
one at a time and they read a piece.
We talk about the piece, ask them how their days go and get
to know the person behind the heart is my whole thing.
It's really heavily focused on mental health and just the
community that's come from that.We've started up a group called
(15:10):
Macho and that's like a men's mental mental Health
Organization deal that we're in the process.
Again, started up and some really cool information to come
on that and just a lot of community outreach that we've
been doing as a group. So it's been really fun.
And have you found because you're in Iowa?
(15:33):
Yes, Sir. And have you found a community
that you can see in person? I would love to tell you yes,
right. I have my friends, of course.
I go out and see those guys quite often.
They're great people, but not like this.
Honestly, this is something I kept in the dark from my local
(15:54):
people for a long time because keeping that facade up but
without them seeing this side ofme, it was always easier and
felt safer. But I'm in the process of
tearing that down now, so it's going really well.
The notion of that facade of of letting your, your friends
believe that you're fine. Can you identify like where that
(16:19):
came from? Was it, Is it what your dad
taught you? Is it from pop culture?
What what? What's it from?
I feel like it's, it's the way most men learn, right?
Our, our fathers, we, it's not even that they necessarily teach
us, but we see it as they grow. I mean, I have a piece called My
Father was a Giant, and it talksabout just that.
You know, that man carried the weight of the world.
(16:41):
He was a firefighter. He ran into burning buildings.
And, you know, he wasn't perfect, but he tried and he
fought every day. And I could see he was
struggling and he had his demons, has his demons.
And I learned that from that. OK, so you just keep moving.
(17:02):
You don't stop and you don't show that you're struggling
because the second you show it, that's when you know bad things
happen. People take advantage of it.
And that lessons been true in mylife as well.
So it got to a point that OK, just keep smile on your face and
keep going. Can you share a bit on on how
(17:27):
you felt taking advantage of once you show someone who you
who you really were? Yeah.
So it goes back to like the relationship side of things,
right? I was in a long term
relationship and trying to be careful here.
When I opened up about what I was struggling with all in one
(17:49):
year, I was adding diagnosed with an autoimmune disease.
I had a shoulder surgery. The autoimmune disease is called
ankylosing spondylitis. It's causing my spine to fuse
together on its own and I had a brain surgery to get my deep
brain stimulator put in and my daughter was born all within six
(18:10):
months of each other. It was a crazy whirlwind.
I was a welder at the time. I'd lost my job because my back,
I couldn't do it anymore. My whole identity was gone in
the blink of an eye. And all of a sudden I'm a dad as
well. So I went into a really dark
place and I was open and honest about it.
(18:31):
And the way it was met, just, itwas harsh.
You know, she didn't believe me that I had an autoimmune
disease. She was at the appointment when
they diagnosed me. And she also suffered from like,
postpartum depression. So it's just a masterful slew of
unfortunate circumstances. But now looking back, I see that
(18:56):
at the time it was just war, youknow, and constant back and
forth. And that's really what it boils
down to. That relationship got to a
really toxic place. And because of that, and I felt
because I opened up and had, I've just had that facade on
like I should have been the dad,I should have been, I would have
(19:16):
been fine, right? Well, I I'm going to call it out
and I hope you realize that all those should you just laid out
were absolute lies and you shouldn't have kept pretending
or hiding any. 100 percent, 100%.
I see that now at the time and for a long time afterwards,
(19:37):
definitely didn't believe that, right?
But here we are five years later.
And is, is that that spinal fusion?
Is that the same thing that MickMars from Mötley Crüe has?
Yep. You're that OK?
That's the. Only and the lead singer from
Imagine Dragons as well. Oh, I didn't know that.
(19:57):
Yeah. All right.
So you're in good artistic, expressive company at least.
Yes, yeah, it comes with the territory, apparently.
Colton, I wonder, might you share one more poem?
I'd love to, absolutely. I want to share the first one I
(20:19):
ever put out publicly on TikTok.It's called Man in the Mirror.
It's the first poem in the book.This one I actually did while
I'm tracking it down, did some really cool things with it.
I took and recorded it over an instrumental and that lives on
Spotify. And if you have a chance, I'd
recommend going to check that out.
(20:40):
I love the way it came out. All right, this is man in the
mirror. I wear a smile like a well
tailored lie, sharp at the edges, smooth on the surface.
No one sees the weight behind myeyes because strength looks
better when it's wordless. They call me driven, like
(21:00):
ambition isn't the chain around my throat, like I'm not dragging
myself through days that blur, nights that bite thoughts I
can't escape. I'm moving forward, sure, but
sometimes it feels like I'm running for myself.
But I'm the guy who gets it done, the one who doesn't crack
doesn't break, because breaking means slowing down, and slowing
(21:20):
down means facing the noise, andGod damn it's loud when
everything gets quiet. I'm tired, but I don't stop
because stopping means feeling and feeling means drowning, and
drowning means I lose. I built a life on the edge of a
blade, cutting myself open to prove I can bleed and keep
walking. I chase success like it's a
(21:42):
thing that'll save me, like titles and paychecks will sew up
the hollow parts. But what if they don't?
What if I climb so high I can't breathe and still feel like a
failure when I reach the top? I don't have the luxury of
breaking, not when little eyes are watching I as I see a hero
in the hollow in my frame. And I swear I try.
(22:05):
I try to be the man she thinks Iam, to be the dad who doesn't
fold under the weight. But some nights, when the world
goes quiet, I feel it creeping in, that cold whisper tell me
that I'm not enough. I'm not strong enough, not smart
enough, not ever enough. I want to be more.
More than the man who fakes the smile, more than the weight
(22:27):
pressing into my ribs. I want to be the man who holds
it together, not just for her, but for me.
I want to sleep with the withoutthe fear chasing me down, to
feel like I'm building somethingreal, not just the fragile tower
of expectations. And maybe I'm scared.
Scared that no matter how fast Irun, I'll never outrun the
(22:49):
shadows. Scared that this fire I carry
will burn me alive before it ever lights the way.
But I'm still here, still fighting, because there's no
other choice. Because the man I want to become
is watching, and I don't want tolet him down.
So I keep walking, with the weight, with the fear, with the
(23:09):
doubts I hide and a smile sharp enough to cut.
Because if I stop, I might not ever start again.
Like I said before this, your work is not poetry.
How I normally describe and see poetry, it is gut wrenching.
Confessions. Yeah, yeah, it's a.
(23:32):
Good way to put it. Yeah, so it's not, this is not
the sort of book you, you, you, you get in the boat and sit with
your sweetheart and drink champagne and recite to each
other. This is the one you eat at 2:00
in the morning when you can't get to sleep and you're
struggling. You had a rough day.
You don't want to keep going. This is that book.
It's not the There's no frills, there's no bows, there's no
(23:54):
happy endings. I'm brutally honest with you all
the way through. You know I can't.
I've said it before, I can't pull you out of the fire, but I
can sit with you. And that's what this book does.
Yeah. And, and again, I would
challenge one thing there. There is a happy ending and the
happy ending can be not alone. Yeah.
(24:15):
You're right, you're right. Yeah, recognition.
And again, anyone that reads this book, you're giving them
permission to feel this bad to no other men feel this bad as
well and that you've gotten through it.
They can get through it. I've gotten through it right
there. There.
(24:35):
There is an end insight. Cool.
Absolutely. So you you mentioned therapy
helping you. Is there another practice, a
program or a book that has helped you that you would like
to share? You know, honestly, I had to
take a step back and learn how to make time for myself and sit
(24:59):
with myself because I was the type of guy that as soon as I
open my eyes after getting approximately 4 hours of sleep,
I was starting to work. And as soon as I got my daughter
off to school, I was sitting at the computer responding to
emails, getting on meetings. All I did was grind, grind,
(25:19):
grind from time I wrote woke up until which I get up about 4:00
in the morning and I go to bed about midnight.
And that's been my cycle for thelast eight years trying to get
get to where I want to be. And I have no idea where that
is. I've just been running,
honestly, and grind him because that's what you're supposed to
(25:42):
do. At least that's what I thought.
And I never made time for myself.
I'd make time for other people, for my daughter, for my family,
for my friends, but never for myself.
And taking that time to sit downand fell in love with video
games again, as goofy as that sounds, just find something you
(26:02):
can do for yourself. Beautiful.
So as I shared it was just this morning I read the first lie and
I was in tears. So made me just wonder when's
the last time you cried? So just what was it?
(26:23):
Monday? Yeah, Monday I was doing alive.
And there's a poet in there thatgoes by the name of A&M.
She's fantastic and she came up and share this piece that was
basically written. She dedicated it to me in the
moment, which caught me all the way off guard.
(26:45):
And it was as if from a perspective that if she was my
mother and give me permission tofeel all these different types
of way, It's OK to be soft. You don't have to be the
strongest person. You're more than a paycheck.
Like all the things I needed to hear, right?
It's get real for a minute. I lost my job last Thursday and
(27:06):
was struggling. We're good now.
I got another one right away. I work in insurance, so I live
in Iowa. It's dime a dozen here,
thankfully. But hearing that right after
that happened, it just, and I bawled right there on live in
front of everybody, had tears streaming down my face and it
(27:29):
went against everything I knew up to that point.
And it was amazing, honestly. Oh, good.
I'm I'm glad you're still learning and growing and
challenging and letting all the bullshit just just fall away.
You know, there, there. It's it's that that phrase, a
good cry exists because I alwaysfeel better.
(27:53):
After like. Even a even a ugly cry.
Oh yeah, yeah, the ugly ones arealmost better, to be honest.
Now without bringing up any selfjudgement and shooting, but is
there anything you wish you had learned at a younger age?
And it's OK to not be OK simply right, that you don't have to be
(28:18):
the toughest guy in the room, that you don't have to fight the
battles alone. You, you can talk.
You can talk to your friends, you can talk to your family.
You can talk to random people onthe Internet.
You know, people are inherently good and they care, you know, So
(28:41):
reach out, talk to them. And The thing is, you're going
to talk to the wrong person every once in a while and
they're going to make you feel alittle worse.
And that's just going to happen.There's no getting around it.
The good ones, which there's plenty more good ones than
you'll ever find bad, man, they'll change your life.
(29:01):
So just talk. Bolton, what are you looking
forward to? Cool.
This is where I should say like,oh, I'm excited to release my
book and. Don't, don't show.
Anything truthfully, I'm lookingforward to seeing kind of what
this all brings, but I'm also learning to to enjoy the
(29:24):
journey. So for once in my life, I'm
trying not to look forward. I'm trying to live in the moment
and really appreciate, appreciate the climb.
Is there anything that you wish more men knew?
Just what I said that it's OK tonot be OK and you don't have to
carry the weight alone. Did your learning that lesson?
(29:47):
Was it 1 moment of insight or isit lots of little steps?
No, I actually have a piece in my book and that touches on
this. This whole, as you're going
through it, you feel like once you get there, you'll know.
You know there will be a big fanfare and celebration and a
neon flashing light up in the sky.
(30:09):
Absolutely not. You wake up one day and you
realize, I feel, I feel a littlebetter.
And then you look back and wow, I felt better for a long time.
And really, it hits his boredom because when you're in survival
mode, you don't have the chance to be bored.
And at least for me, it did right.
(30:31):
I was really bored initially because I wasn't scattering and
trying to keep myself busy. I was able to just sit and it
was awful, but at the same time it was great.
I'd never been able to to do that.
Yeah, I remember when I when again, when I was growing up and
(30:51):
was depressed and suicidal. I remember thinking similar
thoughts like I'm born at the wrong time.
If I had to, if I was a pioneer on the edge of society, I'd be
having to fight for a life everymoment.
Then I then I wouldn't have timeto think.
Yeah, exactly. What's the best way for people
to to follow you to see everything that you're up to?
Absolutely. So I'm really bad at social
(31:12):
media, only posting on TikTok right now.
I'm trying to trying to be better about getting on the
other platforms, but you can find me there at Poetry dot by
dot Colton and I'm live there Mondays, Wednesdays, Fridays and
Saturdays, so we'll be up tonight.
Colton I, I, I said before. And I, I, I, I'm, I am not
(31:35):
blowing smoke up your ass. Your work is powerful, guttural,
impactful, and once it's out, I'm going to promote the hell
out of this. I think this is a great book for
like every men's group to get and to like read together and
have that shared experience and open up discussions and not just
read it alone at 2. AMI think that's kind of a most
(31:56):
dangerous thing you might do with some of this.
Again, I was I was floored as asI read some of this content
today so. Thank you.
That truly means the world. That's that's why it's out
there. You know, I because I just want,
want me to resonate with some people and I want to I want to
(32:18):
help. Yeah, and this is something that
I found time and time again and and you're living example of it
too. When you authentically share
yourself, it can't help but resonate with others.
Absolutely and. You know, I'm I'm glad you got
(32:39):
drunk enough to to share your. Poetry earlier.
This year and yeah, awesome. So again, thanks for joining us,
Colton, and definitely be following you and see how
everything works out. And I look forward to buying a
ticket to your first tour. Awesome.
Thank you, Andy. Wherever you're discovering
(33:00):
realm and feel, please subscribe, follow, like, share
this episode with somebody now. If you don't know when you want
to go in life, it is impossible to get there.
But if that's your case for you,I invite you to book a free
Clarity call with me. Visit theandygrant.com/talk.
We'll explore what you want and what's in your way of getting
it. Until next time, be good to
(33:20):
yourself.
They tell us not to cry, not to feel, not to break.
They teach us the silence is strength, that swallowing pain
makes us man, that no one wants to hear us anyway.
So we don't speak. And we die in that silence.
Not all at once, not in some grand cinematic way, but piece
by piece, breath by breath, until we're nothing but the
(00:21):
ghosts of the boys we used to be.
Hello and welcome to Real Men Field.
I'm your host, author, coach andhealer, Andy Grant.
Please visit theandygrant.com tolearn more about me.
We have conversations that most men are not having, but that all
men and the women who love them can benefit from.
My guest today is Colton Ben Valley.
Colton, known online as Poetry by Colton, is a spoken word
(00:44):
poet, father, and the author of Let's Talk About It, a poetry
collection that dives head firstinto the realities of Ben's
mental health. Now if I say poetry and you say,
uh, this is something else entirely.
Colton's work is guttural and impactful and had me in tears
this very morning. Colton shares 2 poems from his
(01:06):
book, talks about the fire he finds himself in, what has
helped him the most, and what hewishes more men realized.
Let's do it. Hello Colton and welcome to Real
Men Feel. Hey, Andy Wodd Beer.
Thank you. You know, when, when you first
reached out to me, you, you havea book of poetry coming out
called Let's Talk about it. And I believe I told you like I
(01:30):
don't read the books of my guests.
I like to be like the listeners who probably haven't read it
either. But this morning I did skim it
and wow, I I'm, I'm not kidding,some of the titles alone we're
really stirring things up for me.
Things like I'm doing great and the night I almost didn't make
it and I did, I loved I read thefirst lie about the lie of
(01:54):
saying I'm fine and man, I had aa guttural impact to that and
other things that I looked at and I'm fine.
You you write about wanting to say that instead of saying I'm
fine. I'm terrified and have a very
emotional, impactful, resonant, great freaking work that this
(02:14):
this I, I am not a poet. When someone says I have a book
of poetry, I'm imagining, oh, rainbows and fairy dust and
things like that. And that is not this at all.
Not at all knows. Yeah, And what else caught me?
Oh, the thing that lives in me again, super powerful.
And it reminded me of a Metallica song that hits me so
(02:38):
hard I can't listen to it because I don't want to lose how
hard it hits me. But it's called the Unnamed
Feeling and it just. I'll share with you.
Check it out. It's like, whoa, like I just, I
just to make sure that was a song.
I played it like an hour and a half ago and I was in tears as I
was reading so much of your of your content too.
(02:58):
So the thing that lives in me, Iwant to touch on that piece,
Man, that was a tough one to write.
I took myself kind of out of thehuman perspective and wrote more
from the perspective of the thing that lives in me, that
tells me I'm not OK, that tells me I'm not good enough.
And the hatred that he has or that that being has him
(03:21):
personifying. It was a really difficult task,
but man, that one was it was a fun one to write and it really
that's my favorite piece. Was it really fun to write?
No, not at all. Not at all.
All right. Good.
Yeah. So what first got you into
poetry? Is this a a new experience or
(03:43):
something you've always done? Yeah, great question.
So it all started when I was about 1314 years old, actually
had dreams of being a rock star and I was in a band and did
pretty good with it. Actually travelled around a
little bit and wrote a lot of myown originals.
So that's where it started. Unfortunately lost my voice.
(04:06):
Will bid a time later due to an essential drummer spreading to
my vocal cords. And so I kept writing, but I
kind of went into into hiding with it.
I never shared what I wrote because it went from songs to
poetry and didn't want that to come across as, oh, he's a soft
guy, he writes poetry, you know what I mean?
(04:27):
Yeah, I, I pretty much do, yeah.Up until about February of this
year, I was hanging out with Buddy after a rough day, had a
couple too many and shared some poetry with him as if I was like
telling him my deepest darkest secret. 2 weeks later he drove
me into a poetry slim and I ended up winning the whole
(04:51):
thing. And that's just kind of ignited
what you see today. The book TikTok, it's gotten
pretty popular there and it's been a really cool.
Journey. Nice.
So from that first drunken shareand then winning the poetry
slam, what made you want to create this book and share it
(05:13):
with the world? You know, I wrote the poetry.
It's always just been for me, and it still is, if I'm being
honest. But I also saw that my
struggles, not necessarily the context of what I'm going
through specifically, but the emotional side of it, it's
universal and men are struggling.
(05:34):
And I mean, I always knew that, right?
We don't talk enough, blah, blah, blah.
But I didn't understand how manymen it truly was until I got on
in front of the public and was reading my poetry to him.
And I get in DMS talking about how how much I meant to him and
so on and so forth. And it just ignited a OK, I need
(05:56):
to get this in front of as many people as I can.
And did that bring up any sort of fears or hesitancy about this
project? Oh, this is terrifying.
It's absolutely terrifying. I'm putting my heart and my soul
on paper and bearing it for the world, you know?
But if I wanted to preach, you know, speak up.
(06:16):
Let's talk more. Let we're not alone.
I have to be the one to take thelead there and say, hey, guys,
look, I'm going through it. I'm not OK.
I'm still on the fire with you. What Just have a space where we
don't have to have that tough external feel on.
We can drop our owner for a little bit.
Yeah, yeah, that that's so important for Meant to have an
(06:38):
opportunity, a community, even just one solitary friendship
where, yeah, that the mask can fall away.
Yeah. Absolutely.
I did not give you a warning about this, but might you read a
poem of your choosing? Oh, I would love to give me your
false. So I do a lot of writing.
I've wrote about 180 pieces since February.
(07:02):
So I'll do one out of the book, though, just because that's what
we're here talking about. And probably in my opinion, the
most, most important piece in the entire book.
It's called Speak Up. They tell us not to cry, not to
feel, not to break. They teach us the silence is
(07:23):
strength, that swallowing pain makes us man, that no one wants
to hear us anyway, so we don't speak.
And we die in that silence. Not all at once, not in some
grand cinematic way, but piece by piece, breath by breath,
until we're nothing but the ghosts of the boys we used to
be. Because we're taught that
feelings are things to be buried, that struggle is
(07:46):
something to be suffered alone. That real men don't ask for
help. I'm sorry, but fuck that.
Strength is a silence. Strength is standing up and
saying I'm not OK. Strength is admitting that the
weight is too heavy, that your hands are shaking, that you
don't know how much longer you can hold on.
Strength is speaking even when your voice trembles, even when
(08:08):
the word stays like shame. Even when everything in you says
no one will understand. Because I promise you, someone
will. I've been there.
I've stared at the ceiling at 3:00 AM wondering if it would
hurt us to just disappear. I've felt the weight of the
world press against my ribs until I forgot how to breathe.
I've drowned in my own silence, and I refuse to do it again.
(08:31):
Too many men choose death over honesty.
Too many men would rather becomea memory than admit their pain
in that. That's a real fucking tragedy.
We lose brothers, fathers, friends because we're too afraid
to say I need help. So I'll say it first.
I need help. Some days I struggle.
Some days I don't know what the hell that I'm doing.
(08:53):
Some days I carry things too heavy for one man, but I speak
anyway. I speak because I refuse to be
another named etched into stone too soon.
I speak because I refuse to let the world convince me that
silence is the answer. And I'm begging you, speak with
me. Speak because your pain is real.
(09:13):
Speak because you're not alone. Speak because you deserve to be
heard. Let's take back what it means to
be strong. Let's make strength mean
brotherhood admission, a voice that refuses to be swallowed.
Because we're not alone. We never were.
But we have to speak up to hear each other.
So speak. Wow.
(09:37):
Yeah, there's nothing I can say about that.
I'm just going to let it be there and breathe, man.
Thank you. Who?
So I've heard you say that this book is not self help but it is
self truth. Could you expand what that
means? Absolutely.
You know, the truth is I can't pull anybody out of the fire.
I'm still sitting in the fire right there with them.
(10:00):
I'm struggling every day. So I wrote this book not not to
help. I hope it helps.
But it's more of a mirror reflection.
I want people to look, read it and say, see themselves in these
lines just so they realize, hey,somebody else feels the same way
(10:21):
I do. And the the book and skimming
through it, it's not only poetry, there are some other
like journaling prompts and suchin it as well.
Yeah. So I put those in there and I
was really hesitant on doing that, but I wanted to.
And at the end of the day, I decided to go through with it
because even if you don't journal, don't write, whatever
(10:42):
the case may be, there's something really powerful about
putting words on a page or even just saying stuff out loud.
So take it for what it's worth and read those.
Talk about it to yourself, to the mirror at 3:00 AM, or put it
on a page. It's either way.
(11:02):
Just it's a coping skill I use and I wanted to share it with
the rest with anybody who picks up this book.
And so the again, the book is let's talk about it.
When does it come out and how might people find it?
Yeah, absolutely. So it's it'll be out June 1st on
Amazon. I also have a web store that's I
(11:25):
can't remember the exact name ofthe website, believe it's just
poetry by Colton, but the link is in my bio on TikTok and I can
get that over to you as well. You ever write anything that's
upbeat, hopeful, grateful? I've been struggling with that,
to be totally honest, That's I've been pushing myself to kind
(11:49):
of get out of this funk where all I write is really
introspective and how I'm feeling.
I do have uplifting pieces. I have pieces about nostalgia.
You know, my pieces about my daughter always shine through,
right? That's the happiest part of my
life. So when I read those,
(12:12):
absolutely. But this is definitely my
territory because I'm very honest in what I what I write.
I'm not going to fluff things up.
If I don't feel something, I'm not going to write about it.
They mentioned a couple times that you're you're still in the
fire. Yeah.
What's burning you? It's a great question.
(12:36):
Honestly, it's, it's a drive. It's I feel like I'm not doing
enough, but at the same time I'mdoing so much that it's taken
away from my life. It's the fear, failure, fear,
success. It's the drive to even open up
my eyes and get out of bed in the morning.
It's building a career at the same time trying to finally be
(12:59):
in myself and putting this poetry out there.
It's an everyday struggle to whether I'm good enough or not
good enough or doing too much ornot enough.
It's constant back and forth andfor a lot of years I carried it
by myself and since I've starteddoing this, there's a whole
community of us out there now. It's been really good.
(13:21):
And has this challenge these doubts of being good enough and
worthy? Have these been around for a
long time? Most of my life for as long as I
can remember. To be honest, I had a rough
childhood. I'll call it what it is.
I and never really came out of those struggles.
I grew up, I learned how to carry it a little different
(13:41):
stir, but still still dealing with some of it to this day.
But we're getting through. Besides expressing yourself in
your poetry, in your spoken word, what other tools are are
helping you? Yeah, therapy, honestly, going
(14:02):
to therapy is huge. And just being around the right
people, I can't emphasize how important that is.
When you surround yourself with people who are negative in any
light, right? That can be family, that can be
friends, that can be anybody. When you they bring you down.
(14:23):
And when you surround yourself with people who lift you up, as
weird and simple as it sounds, it's so powerful.
And to that point now where I have this amazing community
around me and I've never felt better, to be honest, so.
What's this community? What?
What have you found? What have you made?
Yeah, so a bunch of us on it allstarted just kind of on TikTok.
(14:47):
We're doing TikTok lives and I host one where I bring people up
one at a time and they read a piece.
We talk about the piece, ask them how their days go and get
to know the person behind the heart is my whole thing.
It's really heavily focused on mental health and just the
community that's come from that.We've started up a group called
(15:10):
Macho and that's like a men's mental mental Health
Organization deal that we're in the process.
Again, started up and some really cool information to come
on that and just a lot of community outreach that we've
been doing as a group. So it's been really fun.
And have you found because you're in Iowa?
(15:33):
Yes, Sir. And have you found a community
that you can see in person? I would love to tell you yes,
right. I have my friends, of course.
I go out and see those guys quite often.
They're great people, but not like this.
Honestly, this is something I kept in the dark from my local
(15:54):
people for a long time because keeping that facade up but
without them seeing this side ofme, it was always easier and
felt safer. But I'm in the process of
tearing that down now, so it's going really well.
The notion of that facade of of letting your, your friends
believe that you're fine. Can you identify like where that
(16:19):
came from? Was it, Is it what your dad
taught you? Is it from pop culture?
What what? What's it from?
I feel like it's, it's the way most men learn, right?
Our, our fathers, we, it's not even that they necessarily teach
us, but we see it as they grow. I mean, I have a piece called My
Father was a Giant, and it talksabout just that.
You know, that man carried the weight of the world.
(16:41):
He was a firefighter. He ran into burning buildings.
And, you know, he wasn't perfect, but he tried and he
fought every day. And I could see he was
struggling and he had his demons, has his demons.
And I learned that from that. OK, so you just keep moving.
(17:02):
You don't stop and you don't show that you're struggling
because the second you show it, that's when you know bad things
happen. People take advantage of it.
And that lessons been true in mylife as well.
So it got to a point that OK, just keep smile on your face and
keep going. Can you share a bit on on how
(17:27):
you felt taking advantage of once you show someone who you
who you really were? Yeah.
So it goes back to like the relationship side of things,
right? I was in a long term
relationship and trying to be careful here.
When I opened up about what I was struggling with all in one
(17:49):
year, I was adding diagnosed with an autoimmune disease.
I had a shoulder surgery. The autoimmune disease is called
ankylosing spondylitis. It's causing my spine to fuse
together on its own and I had a brain surgery to get my deep
brain stimulator put in and my daughter was born all within six
(18:10):
months of each other. It was a crazy whirlwind.
I was a welder at the time. I'd lost my job because my back,
I couldn't do it anymore. My whole identity was gone in
the blink of an eye. And all of a sudden I'm a dad as
well. So I went into a really dark
place and I was open and honest about it.
(18:31):
And the way it was met, just, itwas harsh.
You know, she didn't believe me that I had an autoimmune
disease. She was at the appointment when
they diagnosed me. And she also suffered from like,
postpartum depression. So it's just a masterful slew of
unfortunate circumstances. But now looking back, I see that
(18:56):
at the time it was just war, youknow, and constant back and
forth. And that's really what it boils
down to. That relationship got to a
really toxic place. And because of that, and I felt
because I opened up and had, I've just had that facade on
like I should have been the dad,I should have been, I would have
(19:16):
been fine, right? Well, I I'm going to call it out
and I hope you realize that all those should you just laid out
were absolute lies and you shouldn't have kept pretending
or hiding any. 100 percent, 100%.
I see that now at the time and for a long time afterwards,
(19:37):
definitely didn't believe that, right?
But here we are five years later.
And is, is that that spinal fusion?
Is that the same thing that MickMars from Mötley Crüe has?
Yep. You're that OK?
That's the. Only and the lead singer from
Imagine Dragons as well. Oh, I didn't know that.
(19:57):
Yeah. All right.
So you're in good artistic, expressive company at least.
Yes, yeah, it comes with the territory, apparently.
Colton, I wonder, might you share one more poem?
I'd love to, absolutely. I want to share the first one I
(20:19):
ever put out publicly on TikTok.It's called Man in the Mirror.
It's the first poem in the book.This one I actually did while
I'm tracking it down, did some really cool things with it.
I took and recorded it over an instrumental and that lives on
Spotify. And if you have a chance, I'd
recommend going to check that out.
(20:40):
I love the way it came out. All right, this is man in the
mirror. I wear a smile like a well
tailored lie, sharp at the edges, smooth on the surface.
No one sees the weight behind myeyes because strength looks
better when it's wordless. They call me driven, like
(21:00):
ambition isn't the chain around my throat, like I'm not dragging
myself through days that blur, nights that bite thoughts I
can't escape. I'm moving forward, sure, but
sometimes it feels like I'm running for myself.
But I'm the guy who gets it done, the one who doesn't crack
doesn't break, because breaking means slowing down, and slowing
(21:20):
down means facing the noise, andGod damn it's loud when
everything gets quiet. I'm tired, but I don't stop
because stopping means feeling and feeling means drowning, and
drowning means I lose. I built a life on the edge of a
blade, cutting myself open to prove I can bleed and keep
walking. I chase success like it's a
(21:42):
thing that'll save me, like titles and paychecks will sew up
the hollow parts. But what if they don't?
What if I climb so high I can't breathe and still feel like a
failure when I reach the top? I don't have the luxury of
breaking, not when little eyes are watching I as I see a hero
in the hollow in my frame. And I swear I try.
(22:05):
I try to be the man she thinks Iam, to be the dad who doesn't
fold under the weight. But some nights, when the world
goes quiet, I feel it creeping in, that cold whisper tell me
that I'm not enough. I'm not strong enough, not smart
enough, not ever enough. I want to be more.
More than the man who fakes the smile, more than the weight
(22:27):
pressing into my ribs. I want to be the man who holds
it together, not just for her, but for me.
I want to sleep with the withoutthe fear chasing me down, to
feel like I'm building somethingreal, not just the fragile tower
of expectations. And maybe I'm scared.
Scared that no matter how fast Irun, I'll never outrun the
(22:49):
shadows. Scared that this fire I carry
will burn me alive before it ever lights the way.
But I'm still here, still fighting, because there's no
other choice. Because the man I want to become
is watching, and I don't want tolet him down.
So I keep walking, with the weight, with the fear, with the
(23:09):
doubts I hide and a smile sharp enough to cut.
Because if I stop, I might not ever start again.
Like I said before this, your work is not poetry.
How I normally describe and see poetry, it is gut wrenching.
Confessions. Yeah, yeah, it's a.
(23:32):
Good way to put it. Yeah, so it's not, this is not
the sort of book you, you, you, you get in the boat and sit with
your sweetheart and drink champagne and recite to each
other. This is the one you eat at 2:00
in the morning when you can't get to sleep and you're
struggling. You had a rough day.
You don't want to keep going. This is that book.
It's not the There's no frills, there's no bows, there's no
(23:54):
happy endings. I'm brutally honest with you all
the way through. You know I can't.
I've said it before, I can't pull you out of the fire, but I
can sit with you. And that's what this book does.
Yeah. And, and again, I would
challenge one thing there. There is a happy ending and the
happy ending can be not alone. Yeah.
(24:15):
You're right, you're right. Yeah, recognition.
And again, anyone that reads this book, you're giving them
permission to feel this bad to no other men feel this bad as
well and that you've gotten through it.
They can get through it. I've gotten through it right
there. There.
(24:35):
There is an end insight. Cool.
Absolutely. So you you mentioned therapy
helping you. Is there another practice, a
program or a book that has helped you that you would like
to share? You know, honestly, I had to
take a step back and learn how to make time for myself and sit
(24:59):
with myself because I was the type of guy that as soon as I
open my eyes after getting approximately 4 hours of sleep,
I was starting to work. And as soon as I got my daughter
off to school, I was sitting at the computer responding to
emails, getting on meetings. All I did was grind, grind,
(25:19):
grind from time I wrote woke up until which I get up about 4:00
in the morning and I go to bed about midnight.
And that's been my cycle for thelast eight years trying to get
get to where I want to be. And I have no idea where that
is. I've just been running,
honestly, and grind him because that's what you're supposed to
(25:42):
do. At least that's what I thought.
And I never made time for myself.
I'd make time for other people, for my daughter, for my family,
for my friends, but never for myself.
And taking that time to sit downand fell in love with video
games again, as goofy as that sounds, just find something you
(26:02):
can do for yourself. Beautiful.
So as I shared it was just this morning I read the first lie and
I was in tears. So made me just wonder when's
the last time you cried? So just what was it?
(26:23):
Monday? Yeah, Monday I was doing alive.
And there's a poet in there thatgoes by the name of A&M.
She's fantastic and she came up and share this piece that was
basically written. She dedicated it to me in the
moment, which caught me all the way off guard.
(26:45):
And it was as if from a perspective that if she was my
mother and give me permission tofeel all these different types
of way, It's OK to be soft. You don't have to be the
strongest person. You're more than a paycheck.
Like all the things I needed to hear, right?
It's get real for a minute. I lost my job last Thursday and
(27:06):
was struggling. We're good now.
I got another one right away. I work in insurance, so I live
in Iowa. It's dime a dozen here,
thankfully. But hearing that right after
that happened, it just, and I bawled right there on live in
front of everybody, had tears streaming down my face and it
(27:29):
went against everything I knew up to that point.
And it was amazing, honestly. Oh, good.
I'm I'm glad you're still learning and growing and
challenging and letting all the bullshit just just fall away.
You know, there, there. It's it's that that phrase, a
good cry exists because I alwaysfeel better.
(27:53):
After like. Even a even a ugly cry.
Oh yeah, yeah, the ugly ones arealmost better, to be honest.
Now without bringing up any selfjudgement and shooting, but is
there anything you wish you had learned at a younger age?
And it's OK to not be OK simply right, that you don't have to be
(28:18):
the toughest guy in the room, that you don't have to fight the
battles alone. You, you can talk.
You can talk to your friends, you can talk to your family.
You can talk to random people onthe Internet.
You know, people are inherently good and they care, you know, So
(28:41):
reach out, talk to them. And The thing is, you're going
to talk to the wrong person every once in a while and
they're going to make you feel alittle worse.
And that's just going to happen.There's no getting around it.
The good ones, which there's plenty more good ones than
you'll ever find bad, man, they'll change your life.
(29:01):
So just talk. Bolton, what are you looking
forward to? Cool.
This is where I should say like,oh, I'm excited to release my
book and. Don't, don't show.
Anything truthfully, I'm lookingforward to seeing kind of what
this all brings, but I'm also learning to to enjoy the
(29:24):
journey. So for once in my life, I'm
trying not to look forward. I'm trying to live in the moment
and really appreciate, appreciate the climb.
Is there anything that you wish more men knew?
Just what I said that it's OK tonot be OK and you don't have to
carry the weight alone. Did your learning that lesson?
(29:47):
Was it 1 moment of insight or isit lots of little steps?
No, I actually have a piece in my book and that touches on
this. This whole, as you're going
through it, you feel like once you get there, you'll know.
You know there will be a big fanfare and celebration and a
neon flashing light up in the sky.
(30:09):
Absolutely not. You wake up one day and you
realize, I feel, I feel a littlebetter.
And then you look back and wow, I felt better for a long time.
And really, it hits his boredom because when you're in survival
mode, you don't have the chance to be bored.
And at least for me, it did right.
(30:31):
I was really bored initially because I wasn't scattering and
trying to keep myself busy. I was able to just sit and it
was awful, but at the same time it was great.
I'd never been able to to do that.
Yeah, I remember when I when again, when I was growing up and
(30:51):
was depressed and suicidal. I remember thinking similar
thoughts like I'm born at the wrong time.
If I had to, if I was a pioneer on the edge of society, I'd be
having to fight for a life everymoment.
Then I then I wouldn't have timeto think.
Yeah, exactly. What's the best way for people
to to follow you to see everything that you're up to?
Absolutely. So I'm really bad at social
(31:12):
media, only posting on TikTok right now.
I'm trying to trying to be better about getting on the
other platforms, but you can find me there at Poetry dot by
dot Colton and I'm live there Mondays, Wednesdays, Fridays and
Saturdays, so we'll be up tonight.
Colton I, I, I said before. And I, I, I, I'm, I am not
(31:35):
blowing smoke up your ass. Your work is powerful, guttural,
impactful, and once it's out, I'm going to promote the hell
out of this. I think this is a great book for
like every men's group to get and to like read together and
have that shared experience and open up discussions and not just
read it alone at 2. AMI think that's kind of a most
(31:56):
dangerous thing you might do with some of this.
Again, I was I was floored as asI read some of this content
today so. Thank you.
That truly means the world. That's that's why it's out
there. You know, I because I just want,
want me to resonate with some people and I want to I want to
(32:18):
help. Yeah, and this is something that
I found time and time again and and you're living example of it
too. When you authentically share
yourself, it can't help but resonate with others.
Absolutely and. You know, I'm I'm glad you got
(32:39):
drunk enough to to share your. Poetry earlier.
This year and yeah, awesome. So again, thanks for joining us,
Colton, and definitely be following you and see how
everything works out. And I look forward to buying a
ticket to your first tour. Awesome.
Thank you, Andy. Wherever you're discovering
(33:00):
realm and feel, please subscribe, follow, like, share
this episode with somebody now. If you don't know when you want
to go in life, it is impossible to get there.
But if that's your case for you,I invite you to book a free
Clarity call with me. Visit theandygrant.com/talk.
We'll explore what you want and what's in your way of getting
it. Until next time, be good to
(33:20):
yourself.
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