October 31, 2023 • 35 mins
Ever feel like you're carrying the emotional weight of the world on your shoulders, especially in relationships? You might be an empath. Join me, your host Kristen Schwartz, on a deep dive into the torrent of emotions that come with love for those of us who deeply feel everything.
We'll unravel the complexities of emotional reciprocity and intuition while providing practical steps to avoid emotional exhaustion, including journaling your emotional journey and practicing mindfulness. The goal? To help you maintain your sparkle and build deep, healthy connections.
But that's not all! We'll also explore how to create and uphold healthy boundaries in relationships. You'll learn to establish emotional and physical check-ins, set time boundaries, and create open, transparent communication channels.
We'll also tackle the tough stuff, like managing emotional challenges, identifying energy vampires, and preserving your precious energy.
Because let's face it, as an empath, we often find ourselves in draining social situations.
So, get ready to learn how to navigate communication breakdowns and develop exit strategies that respect your emotional well-being. Join me as we journey together towards healthier, happier relationships.
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Thanks for tuning in to the Realized Empath Podcast! 🎙️
If you're vibing with us, there's so much more to explore. Head over to RealizedEmpath.com for free resources, blog posts, and a community of like-minded souls. 🌱
Don't forget to follow us on Instagram, TikTok and Facebook @RealizedEmpath for daily inspiration and empath hacks. Until next time, stay sensitive and strong! ✌️💕"
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Transcript
Episode Transcript
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Announcer (00:01):
You're listening to the Realized Empath Podcast,
where we get real about lovingand stumbling through our
sensitive lives With your hostand holistic counselor, Kristen
Schwartz, who helps redefinewhat's possible for an empath
who embraces a path ofself-healing.
Kristen (00:22):
Hello, beautiful souls, and welcome back to the
Realized Empath Podcast.
I am Kristen Schwartz, yourhost, and today we are going to
dive deep like ocean floor deepinto how to navigate love as an
empath without losing your ownsparkle.
You know how some podcasts skimthe surface.
(00:45):
Yeah, not us.
We're going to go into thetrenches of emotion, love and
personal well-being.
So grab your emotional snorkeland let's dive in.
Next, I want to share how I'mgoing to segment out the content
for this episode.
What I'm going to do is I'mgoing to have different topic
segments and we'll go into somereal life examples and details
(01:09):
of each segment, and then I'mgoing to go into actionable
steps, things that you can do toactually build healthy, deep
connections with those that youcare about.
So let's get started.
That one is what does it mean tobe an empath in a relationship?
(01:32):
Right, the ever-present,highly-tuned emotional radar of
an empath.
It's both a blessing and acurse, right?
Being an empath in arelationship is like playing an
instrument with no volumecontrol.
You can compose the mostbeautiful symphonies, but the
same instrument can also blastout sound so overwhelming that
(01:56):
it drowns everything else.
So here's the nitty-gritty ofwhy that happens.
First, let's talk aboutemotional reciprocity.
So, as an empath, you not onlyfeel what your partner is
feeling, but often you alsoproject those emotions back.
It's like a human echo.
When your partner is happy, youamplify that joy back, but when
(02:22):
they're stressed or upset youremotional state can spiral too.
So what are some real lifeexamples?
So let's say your partner isworried about a big meeting and
you pick up on that anxiety andstart to feel uneasy, maybe even
taking on physical symptomslike a racing heart or sweaty
(02:43):
palms.
And the kicker you start toworry about things unrelated to
your partner's meeting, likeyour own to-do list or family
issues.
Your emotional echo not onlymirrors, but it multiplies.
Now, have you ever heard thatsaying like energy attracts like
(03:04):
energy?
So when you pick up thedis-ease of your partner, you're
going to then attract to yousimilar thoughts about your own
life.
So second, as an empath, yourintuition is on hyperdrive, so
you can sense subtle shifts inenergy, reading between the
lines on what said and un-said.
(03:25):
But it can also be a fantastictool for deep connection,
allowing you to be amind-blowingly supportive
partner.
Okay, real life example numbertwo your partner comes home
quiet and distant.
They say they're fine, but yourintuitive antenna is up and you
know better.
So you gently coax out what'sbothering them, offering a level
(03:50):
of emotional support thatothers might miss.
However, this intuition comeswith a cost emotional exhaustion
.
Your brain is constantlyprocessing a huge amount of
emotional data, so when yourpartner is going through a
roller coaster of feelings,guess who's strapped right
beside them?
Yep, you are.
So what are some actionablesteps?
(04:11):
I know I talk about this a lot.
That's why the firstdownloadable content that I made
free to my followers was therealized empath journal.
But journaling your emotionallandscape can help keep things
in check.
So try keeping an empath diarywhere you jot down moments of
emotional influx, know whattriggered it Was it your emotion
(04:35):
or someone else's?
And once you've gotten enoughentries, look for patterns.
You want to identify triggersand discuss them with your
partner.
It's like drawing an emotionalmap that guides you through the
maze of both you and yourpartner's feelings.
Actionable step number two ispracticing mindfulness, and
(04:56):
mindfulness can be a lifesaver.
So it's as simple as takingfive minutes a day to focus on
your breath, slowing you tocenter yourself.
This is an essential tool forfiltering out which emotions are
yours and which ones you'repicking up from others.
Okay, so we just journeyedthrough the wonder of being an
(05:17):
empath and love and deepconnections and soulful
interactions, the wholeemotional smorgasbord.
But let's get real, it's notall sunshine and rainbows.
So let's shift gears into thenitty gritty which are the bumps
on the highway.
So segment number two is ourcommon pitfalls as empaths in
(05:40):
relationships.
So we're pro at feeling, butthat can lead us straight into
emotional quicksand.
So the pitfall is emotionaloverload.
It's the equivalent of eatingemotionally but never feeling
full.
You keep absorbing andabsorbing until you're
emotionally overstuffed.
(06:01):
It's as if you're an emotionaldepartment store and everyone's
going on a shopping spree.
But what happens when theshelves are empty?
That's burnout.
So let's identify some commonpitfalls that trip us up as
impasse in relationships.
First one is absorbing negativeenergy.
This one's tricky.
(06:21):
It's like you walk into a roomand suddenly you're not yourself
anymore.
So let's say, your husband orwife or partner come home upset
from work politics.
The tension isn't just palpable, it becomes your tension too.
So when this happens, you starttaking on fixer role.
(06:45):
You work overtime to changetheir mood, only to find that
you're exhausted and they'restill upset.
And most of the time this iswhen resentment sets in.
Next we have overextendingyourself.
So you feel so deeply that youthink you can absorb everyone's
(07:06):
problems.
Example let's say your friendis going through a breakup or
your cousin lost their job, oryour partner is stressed and
you're the go-to person foremotional support.
So you keep giving until you'rerunning on empty.
And then who takes care of you?
Often nobody, because you'veset a precedent that you're the
(07:28):
caregiver, not the one to becared for.
Next pitfall is ignoring yourown needs.
You're the emotional sponge,but sponges need to be squeezed
out too.
So here's an example you get soentangled with your partner's
challenges at work that youforget you have your own job
stress to deal with.
So you start skipping yourworkouts, your alone time and
(07:51):
even meals because you're soengrossed in solving problems
that aren't yours.
Next pitfall lack of emotionalboundaries.
So no walls mean you're an opencity for emotional invasions.
For example, your roommate'sgoing through a breakup and
suddenly you're the one eatingice cream and watching breakup
(08:13):
movies.
So not having boundaries canoften lead you to lose your
sense of self.
You become an emotionalchameleon, adapting to the
emotional colors of those aroundyou.
And last but not least, pitfalland I'm not saying.
These are all of our pitfalls,but I chose the most common.
Last one is indecision.
(08:33):
So imagine being in a room fullof people trying to choose a
Netflix show.
That's your daily life.
Making decisions, picking aplace to eat, becomes an
existential crisis, so tuned into everyone else's preferences
that you forget to have your own.
The irony your indecisivenessaimed to prevent disappointment
(08:54):
often becomes the source of it.
So people want you to take astand, but you're too worried
about pleasing everyone.
Okay, so that was a long list.
So what's one actionable stepthat can help soften all of
these examples?
Prioritize yourself.
It's not selfish, it'snecessary.
(09:15):
So block out some you time onyour calendar like it's a
non-negotiable meeting.
Get to know yourself.
Get comfortable with your needs.
Get comfortable with your voice.
Get comfortable with speakingout.
Get comfortable with asking forwhat you want.
Get comfortable with saying anempowered no, okay.
So if you've diffused theemotional minds and pitfalls,
(09:36):
how are you feeling enlightened?
Because we're not stopping here.
Let's use that newfound wisdomto build something beautiful
your personal boundaries,because, yes, you can be an
empath and still have walls thataren't made of sponge.
All right.
Segment three maintainingboundaries.
(09:57):
Welcome to the holy grail ofempath, survival, the guide to
maintaining your boundaries.
Now that we've tackled thepitfalls, it's time to fortify
your emotional home.
Think of this segment as yourblueprint.
We're about to build somesturdy walls and maybe even a
(10:19):
moat, and don't worry, we're nottalking about isolating
yourself in emotional fortress.
This is about creating ahealthy space where you can
interact meaningfully withothers without losing yourself.
Okay, so first up on ourboundary blueprint is physical
space.
So as much as you love people,you also need your personal
(10:39):
bubble.
For instance, you need a cornerof your home that is just yours
, like a sanctuary where you canrecharge.
So make it a rule this is yoursafe space and you get to
dictate when and how it's shared.
We all need a little space thatwe can go to to set down our
(11:00):
worries and breathe in silence.
Next is emotional check-ins.
So these are your checkpointson the emotional highway.
So before deep diving into heavyconversations, you ask your
partner is now a good time totalk?
Have you ever been in themiddle of something?
(11:21):
For instance, I spend a goodhour or two online replying to
direct messages.
Maybe I'm creating content formy social media, and so there
are times I'm on my phone.
Of course.
Now a lot of times when myhusband walks into the room, he
will think that I'm justmindlessly scrolling when
(11:42):
actually I am creating somethingor I'm replying to a message.
So he'll come into the room infull conversation mode and start
talking to me immediately.
Now I'm put in a position of doI stop creating when I'm in a
flow and look up, or do I keepdoing what I'm doing and not
(12:04):
really listen?
We've gotten to a habit now,when he walks in or I walk into
his office, we say do you have aminute to talk or is this a
good time?
What this does is it sets thestage and ensures that both
parties are emotionallyavailable for discussion.
Next is time boundaries.
So you can give people yourlove, but you can't give them 24
(12:29):
seven access to your emotionalbandwidth.
So you can let your partner andyour friends know that you need
an hour of downtime after work.
This isn't just you time, it'smaintenance for your empathic
abilities.
Think of it like rechargingyour emotional batteries, and
this is really a journey ofself-awareness.
(12:49):
Do you know when you needdowntime?
Do you know how much time youneed after a busy meeting to
fill back up?
Sometimes we spend a lot of ourlives in survival and just go,
go, go that we don't actuallyknow how much time we need
between appointments.
We just got so used to feelinganxious that we never questioned
(13:13):
it.
Next, informational boundaries.
Yes, you can sense things, butyou also have the right to not
know everything.
So you can ask your partner notto share overly detailed
stories or workplace drama.
You're emotionally absorbent,so the less unnecessary
information you have to soak up,the better you can know.
(13:37):
But you don't need to beinundated.
You don't have to revisit thesame information over and over
and over and over again.
You can be one and done.
Okay, so what is an actionablestep that can be applied to each
one of these boundaries?
Explicitly communicating theseboundaries.
(13:59):
So don't assume people willjust get it, because you would
Thus clarify and, mostimportantly, enforce your
boundaries.
Your boundaries are about youbeing able to show up the best
version of yourself.
This is about you and yourhealth.
This is about controlling otherpeople.
(14:21):
I think, once we get a handle onour boundaries and we
understand and we getcomfortable with setting them
and enforcing them, it's likewe're constructing a beautiful
emotional castle, right, moatand all.
But remember, even the bestarchitecture needs maintenance.
So keep an eye on those wallsand don't forget to lower the
(14:43):
drawbridge once in a while.
I really believe thatboundaries are a living and
breathing entity.
As we grow and heal and evolve,so shall our boundaries.
Okay, so if relationships are adance, then being highly
sensitive adds some intricatefootwork to the mix.
It makes you incredibly attunedto your partner, picking up on
(15:08):
the subtleties that others mightoverlook.
Yet it also leaves you prone tostepping on some toes.
Sometimes we step on our owntoes.
So the complication factor.
Being highly sensitive meansthat even the smallest of
conflicts feel like a grandshowdown.
(15:30):
You don't just hear what's said, you also absorb the emotional
weight behind it, and this canlead to overthinking and
magnifying issues.
It's like taking a pebble of aproblem and seeing it as a
boulder.
For instance, if your partnerforgets to call, you might
(15:51):
spiral into thoughts of them notcaring or losing interest, even
when the reason could be assimple as them being busy.
So what I have found that hasbeen really helpful, that I
implemented, is the 24 hour rule.
This would be our actionablestep for when our overthinking
(16:11):
and deeply feeling can pairtogether and complicate things.
The 24 hour rule, what it is isbefore reacting, before saying
something when you are feelingemotional, give yourself 24
hours to process what that doesis it builds in this buffer to
(16:31):
prevent overreacting.
It's like we're letting ouremotions smooth out a bit.
It's like, if you imagine, ouremotions are a stormy ocean, big
waves, so we're allowing theocean to calm down a bit before
we actually put words to whatwe're feeling.
(16:52):
So let's say we do have somehiccups in our relationship,
like an argument or a full onemotional meltdown.
How do we recover ourrelationship power?
How do we mend the mess ups?
First is the authentic apology.
So you know the drill.
You say you're sorry, but gobeyond just mouthing the words.
(17:15):
Make your apology specific, soaddressing exactly what you did
wrong and acknowledge how itmade the other person feel.
For example, instead of justsaying I'm sorry, try, I'm sorry
, I snapped at you when youforgot to call.
I know my reaction was out ofproportion and I can see how it
(17:38):
hurt you.
Next is have open, transparentcommunication.
Open up about why you reactedthe way that you did, explain it
to your heightened sensitivity,if that's the case, because
transparency builds trust.
So, for example, for example, Ireacted strongly because when
you didn't call it triggered myfear of abandonment.
(18:00):
I know it's my issue, butsharing it with you helps me
process it.
Next is mutual strategy building.
So work together with yourpartner to prevent future
mishaps.
So this is where your emotionalattunement can be a superpower,
so use it to sense whatstrategies might work best for
(18:22):
both of you.
For example, let's agree toalways text if we're going to be
late or can't call, so we canmanage each other's expectations
better.
Okay, so what's an actionablestep when it comes to
maintaining relationships andthe hiccups that come with it?
I think a great one isscheduling regular relationship
(18:43):
check-ins.
So this can be weekly ormonthly, whatever suits you.
You want to use this time toopenly discuss what's working
and what's not, and makingadjustments as you go along.
Think of it as yourrelationship's state of the
union address.
It's a chance to reassess youremotional strategies and
(19:04):
reinforce connection.
So being a highly sensitiveperson in a relationship is a
bit like being a tightropewalker the highs are
breathtaking, but the risks arereal.
The key to maintaining balanceis understanding your emotional
weight and learning how todistribute it effectively.
You don't have to carry theemotional load alone.
(19:26):
Share it and walk the tightropetogether.
Okay, so we just wrapped upsome talk about the relationship
hiccups and how to navigatethose, but there's a whole other
side of the coin we need toflip to.
In this next segment, we'regoing to talk about the art of
balance.
How can we love deeply withoutlosing that oh-so-important
(19:52):
sense of self?
So it's like achieving theperfect equilibrium in love, so
being deeply connected to yourpartner while also retaining
your beautiful individualessence.
So let's talk about somedifferent ways that we can help
maintain our personalsovereignty.
(20:12):
First thing is understandingthe balance.
So you're not just one half ofa relationship, you're a whole
person, and remembering that isthe first step in achieving
balance.
So think of it as dancing youmove together, yet you also have
your own steps and flair, soboth are necessary for a
(20:35):
beautiful performance.
So let's say, your partnerloves hiking and you're more of
a spa day aficiado.
You enjoy your own activitiesseparately, but still you carve
out time for mutual interests.
Next is harmonizing yourinterests.
So couples often make themistake of totally merging their
(20:58):
interests, and balance meansappreciating the unique joys
each of you brings into arelationship.
So make a list of yourindividual hobbies and interests
and celebrate them.
Having separate interests addstexture to your relationship.
So let's say you love culinaryadventures while your partner is
(21:21):
into mountain biking, so youcan dedicate weekends for each
other's hobbies or share newdiscoveries when you regroup.
Next is emotional and physicalspaces.
So privacy doesn't have to meansecrecy.
It means respecting your andyour partner's needs for
solitude or differentexperiences.
(21:44):
So there should be corners ofyour life that belong just to
you, and that's not just okay,it's healthy.
So let's say you have a sacredmorning ritual of journaling and
meditation, and your partnerknows this and respects this
time.
So that creates mutual respectfor personal space.
(22:04):
So what's an actionable step tohelp to build that balance and
maintain your sovereignty?
You can actually kickstart anemotional journal that both you
and your partner contribute toOnce a week.
Sit down and talk about anypatterns, highs or lows that
you've noticed.
It's like your relationship'semotional pulse check.
(22:28):
Remember that communication isthe backbone to all of this,
which is a great segue into ournext segment, because we're
going to talk about how tolisten and talk like a pro in
love.
So we all know and we've heard,that the cornerstone of every
great relationship iscommunication.
But it's not just aboutmouthing words.
(22:50):
It's about the quality, thetone, the timing and so much
more.
So let me get specific.
Let's talk about specificthings that we can do to help us
deepen communication in ourrelationship.
So the first one is the power ofthe pause.
So it might seem awkward atfirst, but taking a moment
(23:13):
before responding can betransformative.
So what the pause does?
It's a mini sanctuary where youcan gather your thoughts and
emotions.
So during a heated argument,let's say that split second can
be a difference betweenescalation and understanding.
Remember it's your space toswitch gears.
(23:35):
Next is non-verbal signals.
So sometimes words can fail usand that's where our bodies can
step in.
So, from eye contact to posture, these silent cues can say more
than a thousand words could.
So you can often gauge yourpartner's mood by their body
(23:59):
language.
If they're visibly tense, maybeit's not the best time to
discuss weekend plans.
Next, the listening factor.
So it's one thing to hear, it'sanother to actually listen.
My husband and I were having adiscussion last night when we
were driving home from gettingmy son's Halloween costume and
we were talking about how, whensomeone is bringing up a subject
(24:22):
or wants to talk to us aboutsomething, as the listener, it's
an opportunity to get to knowthat person on a deeper level.
So listening should be abouttuning into that person and to
understand what a gift it is tobe given a gateway into how this
person sees the world.
(24:42):
But a lot of times what happenswhen we listen is we're
listening but we're making theirstory about us.
We're judging their story,we're trying to find similar
instances in our life where wemight've felt the same way.
We're literally making theirstory about our perspective.
(25:04):
But listening should be aboutgiving that person the space to
express themselves and knowingthat through listening you're
witnessing their experience.
You're showing them that youcare about how they perceive the
world.
So active listening is givingyour full attention and asking
follow-up questions andconfirming your understanding.
(25:26):
For example, let's say yourpartner talks about a difficult
day at work.
Instead of jumping in withsolutions, you ask you know you
say things like that soundstough.
How did that make you feel?
You're showing, through yourresponse, the care that you have
for them.
And here's a great actionablestep for deepening communication
Establish a no interruptionrule during your communication
(25:48):
rituals.
So what this does is it ensuresboth parties have an equal say
and fosters a culture of respectand understanding.
Okay, so that's a wrap on howto make communication your
superpower and relationships.
Trust me, if you master this,you're already miles ahead in
the love game.
So let's jump into our nextsegment, which is overcoming
(26:11):
relationship challenges.
So if you're an empath like me,you know relationships can
sometimes feel like navigating amaze while you're blindfolded.
It can be complicated.
So let's talk about overcomingsome common relationship
challenges.
First is taking on yourpartner's problems.
So this is a common pitfall forimpasse.
(26:32):
You feel so deeply thatsometimes you absorb their
issues like a sponge.
It's a fine line betweenempathy and making someone
else's problem your life mission.
And I wanna remind you thatcodependency is I'm only okay if
you're okay.
So, for example, your partnerhad a terrible day at work and
(26:55):
you find yourself losing sleep,feeling anxious and thinking of
ways to fix their work problems.
So you wanna stop right therebecause, remember, that's their
mountain to climb.
You can be supportive withoutcarrying the burden.
Next is emotional burnout.
So this happens when you giveso much that you neglect your
(27:18):
own needs.
So you're not a limitlessresource.
You've got to recharge too.
So, for example, let's say, formonths you've been the
emotional rock for your partnerthrough his job loss and one day
you snap over something trivial, you've been emotionally
depleted.
This is where self-awarenesscomes in, noticing how something
(27:39):
is affecting you, making surethat you're doing what you need
to do to care for yourself,checking in on what your
intentions are.
Common pitfall communicationbreakdown.
So sometimes the channels justget fuzzy, and it's common.
But ignoring it can snowball.
So when the lines ofcommunications crumble,
(28:01):
assumptions andmisunderstandings then take over
.
So let's say you think yourpartner should just know why
you're upset, so you shut downand then a week of cold
shoulders ensues and no one winsright.
Next is when our boundaries getblurry, especially for impasse.
When you're so attuned to yourpartner you might ignore or
(28:22):
forget your personal boundaries.
And this can also happen whenwe're trying to be ultra
accommodating so you disregardyour own comfort zones, trying
to make everybody elsecomfortable.
For example, you agree toattend every single family event
of your partner, despitefeeling overwhelmed and drained,
just because you know it'simportant to them.
(28:44):
So what's an actionable step?
So for each challenge you wantto have a go to coping mechanism
that both you and your partnerare aware of.
So for emotional burnout, maybeit's a self care day, or for
blur boundaries, perhaps it's ascheduled check in to discuss
your comfort levels.
You can tailor it to make itwork for both of you, but it's
(29:08):
just important that you havesome solution or actionable step
or go to in your toolbox tohelp you navigate each of each
one of these challenges.
So we've talked about romanticrelationships, but let's not
forget the social spear, whereimpasse can often be skating on
thin ice.
So let's go into how togracefully float through social
(29:32):
scenarios while maintaining ourempathic essence.
First one is reading the room.
So the classic empath trait ofnot just reading the room,
feeling the room, but butpractically absorbing it, so
sensing everyone's mood, can beboth a gift and a curse.
So have you ever been at aparty and suddenly felt anxious,
(29:53):
only to realize it wasn't youranxiety but someone else's?
It has happened to me more thanI can count and I've used that
as a way to not attend eventsmany times.
Next are energy vampires.
Yes, they're real and no, theydon't have fangs, but they can
drain you.
I usually don't use this word,but I thought it's Halloween
(30:16):
today when this episode is goingto be posted, so I thought, why
not?
I'll use the word, I'll useenergy vampires.
So learning to identify andshield yourself from energy
vampires is key.
So let's say you have a friendwho always turns the
conversation to her dramas andafterwards you feel drained.
So eventually you have to limitthat friendship for your own
(30:39):
well-being and maybe not evenlimit it.
Maybe it's a matter ofcommunicating and setting a
boundary, but there has to besome action that's taken to make
sure that relationship is morebeneficial to both of you.
So the exit strategy.
So maybe there's some socialsituations where sometimes you
need to ghost politely, ofcourse and again I'm using the
(31:03):
word ghost because it'sHalloween.
I don't literally mean likedisappear and not talk to anyone
ever again.
That's rude.
I would always choose to haveyou communicate if you can, so,
but having a predetermined outfor overwhelming social
situations is a lifesaver.
So this exit strategy isn'tabout even relationships.
It can be about maybe you're ata party and you're going with
(31:26):
your friend, and your friendknows that you're not going to
be able to stay for the entirefour hours, and so maybe you
have a secret code, and thatsecret code is texting your
friend a pineapple emoji to lether know it's time to regroup
and recharge, and an exitstrategy could be driving
separately.
So, again, there's all kinds ofthings that you can insert into
(31:47):
this to make sure that you'recaring for yourself.
Next is protecting your energy,and this isn't about isolating
yourself.
It's about being selectivewhere your energy goes, where
your attention goes, you get tochoose where your intention goes
when a prioritize relationshipsthat are mutual exchanges of
(32:09):
joy and energy.
I know that throughout my lifeI realized that the people that
I was surrounded with were somuch more comfortable with me
sharing my pain than they werewith me sharing my joy.
The discomfort I felt in thoserelationships when I was sharing
my wins because energy that Iwas getting mirrored back to me
(32:30):
was my wins were bragging.
So I realized that I wanted tomake sure that I was surrounded
with people that let me be thewhole of who I am.
So that meant let me be in painwhen I'm in pain and let me be
joyful and excited when thingsare going well.
So I've made sure that onSundays I carve out space to be
(32:56):
in joy.
So what's an actionable step tonurture yourself in social
scenarios?
So on your next socialgathering, I want you to set an
energy limit beforehand.
So decide how much you'll spendthere and stick to it If you
start to feel drained.
Honor that limit, trust me,your future self will thank you.
(33:18):
All right, friends.
So I know we covered a lot, butwe could have gone a lot deeper
into each segment, but thankyou for hanging out with me
today.
It has been the longest podcastepisode that we've done this
season.
But that is a wrap on today'sdeep dive.
But let me hammer home one lastcrucial point.
For impasse, healthyrelationships aren't a luxury,
(33:40):
they're a necessity.
Your emotional well-being isintrinsically linked to the
emotional climate around you.
So a rocky relationship can belike sailing in stormy seas,
while a supportive one is yoursafe harbor.
So just remember, it's crucialto pick a partner, to pick
friends, to pick acquaintanceswho not only appreciate your
(34:05):
depth but also is willing tonavigate those emotional waters
alongside of you.
So be your amazing empathicself, but also prioritize your
own well-being.
Lean into the tools we'vetalked about your impact journal
, your mindfulness practices andopen communication with your
partner.
They're your life buoys in thisocean of emotion.
(34:27):
Relationships are a give andtake, but for impasse the lines
can blur super easily, andthat's why it's so important to
stay anchored in yourself whileyou explore the depths with
someone else.
Until next time, keep thoseenergy levels high and your
emotional scuba tanks full.
(34:49):
Thank you so much, you guys,and I will see you next time.
Bye.
You're listening to the Realized Empath Podcast,
where we get real about lovingand stumbling through our
sensitive lives With your hostand holistic counselor, Kristen
Schwartz, who helps redefinewhat's possible for an empath
who embraces a path ofself-healing.
Kristen (00:22):
Hello, beautiful souls, and welcome back to the
Realized Empath Podcast.
I am Kristen Schwartz, yourhost, and today we are going to
dive deep like ocean floor deepinto how to navigate love as an
empath without losing your ownsparkle.
You know how some podcasts skimthe surface.
(00:45):
Yeah, not us.
We're going to go into thetrenches of emotion, love and
personal well-being.
So grab your emotional snorkeland let's dive in.
Next, I want to share how I'mgoing to segment out the content
for this episode.
What I'm going to do is I'mgoing to have different topic
segments and we'll go into somereal life examples and details
(01:09):
of each segment, and then I'mgoing to go into actionable
steps, things that you can do toactually build healthy, deep
connections with those that youcare about.
So let's get started.
That one is what does it mean tobe an empath in a relationship?
(01:32):
Right, the ever-present,highly-tuned emotional radar of
an empath.
It's both a blessing and acurse, right?
Being an empath in arelationship is like playing an
instrument with no volumecontrol.
You can compose the mostbeautiful symphonies, but the
same instrument can also blastout sound so overwhelming that
(01:56):
it drowns everything else.
So here's the nitty-gritty ofwhy that happens.
First, let's talk aboutemotional reciprocity.
So, as an empath, you not onlyfeel what your partner is
feeling, but often you alsoproject those emotions back.
It's like a human echo.
When your partner is happy, youamplify that joy back, but when
(02:22):
they're stressed or upset youremotional state can spiral too.
So what are some real lifeexamples?
So let's say your partner isworried about a big meeting and
you pick up on that anxiety andstart to feel uneasy, maybe even
taking on physical symptomslike a racing heart or sweaty
(02:43):
palms.
And the kicker you start toworry about things unrelated to
your partner's meeting, likeyour own to-do list or family
issues.
Your emotional echo not onlymirrors, but it multiplies.
Now, have you ever heard thatsaying like energy attracts like
(03:04):
energy?
So when you pick up thedis-ease of your partner, you're
going to then attract to yousimilar thoughts about your own
life.
So second, as an empath, yourintuition is on hyperdrive, so
you can sense subtle shifts inenergy, reading between the
lines on what said and un-said.
(03:25):
But it can also be a fantastictool for deep connection,
allowing you to be amind-blowingly supportive
partner.
Okay, real life example numbertwo your partner comes home
quiet and distant.
They say they're fine, but yourintuitive antenna is up and you
know better.
So you gently coax out what'sbothering them, offering a level
(03:50):
of emotional support thatothers might miss.
However, this intuition comeswith a cost emotional exhaustion
.
Your brain is constantlyprocessing a huge amount of
emotional data, so when yourpartner is going through a
roller coaster of feelings,guess who's strapped right
beside them?
Yep, you are.
So what are some actionablesteps?
(04:11):
I know I talk about this a lot.
That's why the firstdownloadable content that I made
free to my followers was therealized empath journal.
But journaling your emotionallandscape can help keep things
in check.
So try keeping an empath diarywhere you jot down moments of
emotional influx, know whattriggered it Was it your emotion
(04:35):
or someone else's?
And once you've gotten enoughentries, look for patterns.
You want to identify triggersand discuss them with your
partner.
It's like drawing an emotionalmap that guides you through the
maze of both you and yourpartner's feelings.
Actionable step number two ispracticing mindfulness, and
(04:56):
mindfulness can be a lifesaver.
So it's as simple as takingfive minutes a day to focus on
your breath, slowing you tocenter yourself.
This is an essential tool forfiltering out which emotions are
yours and which ones you'repicking up from others.
Okay, so we just journeyedthrough the wonder of being an
(05:17):
empath and love and deepconnections and soulful
interactions, the wholeemotional smorgasbord.
But let's get real, it's notall sunshine and rainbows.
So let's shift gears into thenitty gritty which are the bumps
on the highway.
So segment number two is ourcommon pitfalls as empaths in
(05:40):
relationships.
So we're pro at feeling, butthat can lead us straight into
emotional quicksand.
So the pitfall is emotionaloverload.
It's the equivalent of eatingemotionally but never feeling
full.
You keep absorbing andabsorbing until you're
emotionally overstuffed.
(06:01):
It's as if you're an emotionaldepartment store and everyone's
going on a shopping spree.
But what happens when theshelves are empty?
That's burnout.
So let's identify some commonpitfalls that trip us up as
impasse in relationships.
First one is absorbing negativeenergy.
This one's tricky.
(06:21):
It's like you walk into a roomand suddenly you're not yourself
anymore.
So let's say, your husband orwife or partner come home upset
from work politics.
The tension isn't just palpable, it becomes your tension too.
So when this happens, you starttaking on fixer role.
(06:45):
You work overtime to changetheir mood, only to find that
you're exhausted and they'restill upset.
And most of the time this iswhen resentment sets in.
Next we have overextendingyourself.
So you feel so deeply that youthink you can absorb everyone's
(07:06):
problems.
Example let's say your friendis going through a breakup or
your cousin lost their job, oryour partner is stressed and
you're the go-to person foremotional support.
So you keep giving until you'rerunning on empty.
And then who takes care of you?
Often nobody, because you'veset a precedent that you're the
(07:28):
caregiver, not the one to becared for.
Next pitfall is ignoring yourown needs.
You're the emotional sponge,but sponges need to be squeezed
out too.
So here's an example you get soentangled with your partner's
challenges at work that youforget you have your own job
stress to deal with.
So you start skipping yourworkouts, your alone time and
(07:51):
even meals because you're soengrossed in solving problems
that aren't yours.
Next pitfall lack of emotionalboundaries.
So no walls mean you're an opencity for emotional invasions.
For example, your roommate'sgoing through a breakup and
suddenly you're the one eatingice cream and watching breakup
(08:13):
movies.
So not having boundaries canoften lead you to lose your
sense of self.
You become an emotionalchameleon, adapting to the
emotional colors of those aroundyou.
And last but not least, pitfalland I'm not saying.
These are all of our pitfalls,but I chose the most common.
Last one is indecision.
(08:33):
So imagine being in a room fullof people trying to choose a
Netflix show.
That's your daily life.
Making decisions, picking aplace to eat, becomes an
existential crisis, so tuned into everyone else's preferences
that you forget to have your own.
The irony your indecisivenessaimed to prevent disappointment
(08:54):
often becomes the source of it.
So people want you to take astand, but you're too worried
about pleasing everyone.
Okay, so that was a long list.
So what's one actionable stepthat can help soften all of
these examples?
Prioritize yourself.
It's not selfish, it'snecessary.
(09:15):
So block out some you time onyour calendar like it's a
non-negotiable meeting.
Get to know yourself.
Get comfortable with your needs.
Get comfortable with your voice.
Get comfortable with speakingout.
Get comfortable with asking forwhat you want.
Get comfortable with saying anempowered no, okay.
So if you've diffused theemotional minds and pitfalls,
(09:36):
how are you feeling enlightened?
Because we're not stopping here.
Let's use that newfound wisdomto build something beautiful
your personal boundaries,because, yes, you can be an
empath and still have walls thataren't made of sponge.
All right.
Segment three maintainingboundaries.
(09:57):
Welcome to the holy grail ofempath, survival, the guide to
maintaining your boundaries.
Now that we've tackled thepitfalls, it's time to fortify
your emotional home.
Think of this segment as yourblueprint.
We're about to build somesturdy walls and maybe even a
(10:19):
moat, and don't worry, we're nottalking about isolating
yourself in emotional fortress.
This is about creating ahealthy space where you can
interact meaningfully withothers without losing yourself.
Okay, so first up on ourboundary blueprint is physical
space.
So as much as you love people,you also need your personal
(10:39):
bubble.
For instance, you need a cornerof your home that is just yours
, like a sanctuary where you canrecharge.
So make it a rule this is yoursafe space and you get to
dictate when and how it's shared.
We all need a little space thatwe can go to to set down our
(11:00):
worries and breathe in silence.
Next is emotional check-ins.
So these are your checkpointson the emotional highway.
So before deep diving into heavyconversations, you ask your
partner is now a good time totalk?
Have you ever been in themiddle of something?
(11:21):
For instance, I spend a goodhour or two online replying to
direct messages.
Maybe I'm creating content formy social media, and so there
are times I'm on my phone.
Of course.
Now a lot of times when myhusband walks into the room, he
will think that I'm justmindlessly scrolling when
(11:42):
actually I am creating somethingor I'm replying to a message.
So he'll come into the room infull conversation mode and start
talking to me immediately.
Now I'm put in a position of doI stop creating when I'm in a
flow and look up, or do I keepdoing what I'm doing and not
(12:04):
really listen?
We've gotten to a habit now,when he walks in or I walk into
his office, we say do you have aminute to talk or is this a
good time?
What this does is it sets thestage and ensures that both
parties are emotionallyavailable for discussion.
Next is time boundaries.
So you can give people yourlove, but you can't give them 24
(12:29):
seven access to your emotionalbandwidth.
So you can let your partner andyour friends know that you need
an hour of downtime after work.
This isn't just you time, it'smaintenance for your empathic
abilities.
Think of it like rechargingyour emotional batteries, and
this is really a journey ofself-awareness.
(12:49):
Do you know when you needdowntime?
Do you know how much time youneed after a busy meeting to
fill back up?
Sometimes we spend a lot of ourlives in survival and just go,
go, go that we don't actuallyknow how much time we need
between appointments.
We just got so used to feelinganxious that we never questioned
(13:13):
it.
Next, informational boundaries.
Yes, you can sense things, butyou also have the right to not
know everything.
So you can ask your partner notto share overly detailed
stories or workplace drama.
You're emotionally absorbent,so the less unnecessary
information you have to soak up,the better you can know.
(13:37):
But you don't need to beinundated.
You don't have to revisit thesame information over and over
and over and over again.
You can be one and done.
Okay, so what is an actionablestep that can be applied to each
one of these boundaries?
Explicitly communicating theseboundaries.
(13:59):
So don't assume people willjust get it, because you would
Thus clarify and, mostimportantly, enforce your
boundaries.
Your boundaries are about youbeing able to show up the best
version of yourself.
This is about you and yourhealth.
This is about controlling otherpeople.
(14:21):
I think, once we get a handle onour boundaries and we
understand and we getcomfortable with setting them
and enforcing them, it's likewe're constructing a beautiful
emotional castle, right, moatand all.
But remember, even the bestarchitecture needs maintenance.
So keep an eye on those wallsand don't forget to lower the
(14:43):
drawbridge once in a while.
I really believe thatboundaries are a living and
breathing entity.
As we grow and heal and evolve,so shall our boundaries.
Okay, so if relationships are adance, then being highly
sensitive adds some intricatefootwork to the mix.
It makes you incredibly attunedto your partner, picking up on
(15:08):
the subtleties that others mightoverlook.
Yet it also leaves you prone tostepping on some toes.
Sometimes we step on our owntoes.
So the complication factor.
Being highly sensitive meansthat even the smallest of
conflicts feel like a grandshowdown.
(15:30):
You don't just hear what's said, you also absorb the emotional
weight behind it, and this canlead to overthinking and
magnifying issues.
It's like taking a pebble of aproblem and seeing it as a
boulder.
For instance, if your partnerforgets to call, you might
(15:51):
spiral into thoughts of them notcaring or losing interest, even
when the reason could be assimple as them being busy.
So what I have found that hasbeen really helpful, that I
implemented, is the 24 hour rule.
This would be our actionablestep for when our overthinking
(16:11):
and deeply feeling can pairtogether and complicate things.
The 24 hour rule, what it is isbefore reacting, before saying
something when you are feelingemotional, give yourself 24
hours to process what that doesis it builds in this buffer to
(16:31):
prevent overreacting.
It's like we're letting ouremotions smooth out a bit.
It's like, if you imagine, ouremotions are a stormy ocean, big
waves, so we're allowing theocean to calm down a bit before
we actually put words to whatwe're feeling.
(16:52):
So let's say we do have somehiccups in our relationship,
like an argument or a full onemotional meltdown.
How do we recover ourrelationship power?
How do we mend the mess ups?
First is the authentic apology.
So you know the drill.
You say you're sorry, but gobeyond just mouthing the words.
(17:15):
Make your apology specific, soaddressing exactly what you did
wrong and acknowledge how itmade the other person feel.
For example, instead of justsaying I'm sorry, try, I'm sorry
, I snapped at you when youforgot to call.
I know my reaction was out ofproportion and I can see how it
(17:38):
hurt you.
Next is have open, transparentcommunication.
Open up about why you reactedthe way that you did, explain it
to your heightened sensitivity,if that's the case, because
transparency builds trust.
So, for example, for example, Ireacted strongly because when
you didn't call it triggered myfear of abandonment.
(18:00):
I know it's my issue, butsharing it with you helps me
process it.
Next is mutual strategy building.
So work together with yourpartner to prevent future
mishaps.
So this is where your emotionalattunement can be a superpower,
so use it to sense whatstrategies might work best for
(18:22):
both of you.
For example, let's agree toalways text if we're going to be
late or can't call, so we canmanage each other's expectations
better.
Okay, so what's an actionablestep when it comes to
maintaining relationships andthe hiccups that come with it?
I think a great one isscheduling regular relationship
(18:43):
check-ins.
So this can be weekly ormonthly, whatever suits you.
You want to use this time toopenly discuss what's working
and what's not, and makingadjustments as you go along.
Think of it as yourrelationship's state of the
union address.
It's a chance to reassess youremotional strategies and
(19:04):
reinforce connection.
So being a highly sensitiveperson in a relationship is a
bit like being a tightropewalker the highs are
breathtaking, but the risks arereal.
The key to maintaining balanceis understanding your emotional
weight and learning how todistribute it effectively.
You don't have to carry theemotional load alone.
(19:26):
Share it and walk the tightropetogether.
Okay, so we just wrapped upsome talk about the relationship
hiccups and how to navigatethose, but there's a whole other
side of the coin we need toflip to.
In this next segment, we'regoing to talk about the art of
balance.
How can we love deeply withoutlosing that oh-so-important
(19:52):
sense of self?
So it's like achieving theperfect equilibrium in love, so
being deeply connected to yourpartner while also retaining
your beautiful individualessence.
So let's talk about somedifferent ways that we can help
maintain our personalsovereignty.
(20:12):
First thing is understandingthe balance.
So you're not just one half ofa relationship, you're a whole
person, and remembering that isthe first step in achieving
balance.
So think of it as dancing youmove together, yet you also have
your own steps and flair, soboth are necessary for a
(20:35):
beautiful performance.
So let's say, your partnerloves hiking and you're more of
a spa day aficiado.
You enjoy your own activitiesseparately, but still you carve
out time for mutual interests.
Next is harmonizing yourinterests.
So couples often make themistake of totally merging their
(20:58):
interests, and balance meansappreciating the unique joys
each of you brings into arelationship.
So make a list of yourindividual hobbies and interests
and celebrate them.
Having separate interests addstexture to your relationship.
So let's say you love culinaryadventures while your partner is
(21:21):
into mountain biking, so youcan dedicate weekends for each
other's hobbies or share newdiscoveries when you regroup.
Next is emotional and physicalspaces.
So privacy doesn't have to meansecrecy.
It means respecting your andyour partner's needs for
solitude or differentexperiences.
(21:44):
So there should be corners ofyour life that belong just to
you, and that's not just okay,it's healthy.
So let's say you have a sacredmorning ritual of journaling and
meditation, and your partnerknows this and respects this
time.
So that creates mutual respectfor personal space.
(22:04):
So what's an actionable step tohelp to build that balance and
maintain your sovereignty?
You can actually kickstart anemotional journal that both you
and your partner contribute toOnce a week.
Sit down and talk about anypatterns, highs or lows that
you've noticed.
It's like your relationship'semotional pulse check.
(22:28):
Remember that communication isthe backbone to all of this,
which is a great segue into ournext segment, because we're
going to talk about how tolisten and talk like a pro in
love.
So we all know and we've heard,that the cornerstone of every
great relationship iscommunication.
But it's not just aboutmouthing words.
(22:50):
It's about the quality, thetone, the timing and so much
more.
So let me get specific.
Let's talk about specificthings that we can do to help us
deepen communication in ourrelationship.
So the first one is the power ofthe pause.
So it might seem awkward atfirst, but taking a moment
(23:13):
before responding can betransformative.
So what the pause does?
It's a mini sanctuary where youcan gather your thoughts and
emotions.
So during a heated argument,let's say that split second can
be a difference betweenescalation and understanding.
Remember it's your space toswitch gears.
(23:35):
Next is non-verbal signals.
So sometimes words can fail usand that's where our bodies can
step in.
So, from eye contact to posture, these silent cues can say more
than a thousand words could.
So you can often gauge yourpartner's mood by their body
(23:59):
language.
If they're visibly tense, maybeit's not the best time to
discuss weekend plans.
Next, the listening factor.
So it's one thing to hear, it'sanother to actually listen.
My husband and I were having adiscussion last night when we
were driving home from gettingmy son's Halloween costume and
we were talking about how, whensomeone is bringing up a subject
(24:22):
or wants to talk to us aboutsomething, as the listener, it's
an opportunity to get to knowthat person on a deeper level.
So listening should be abouttuning into that person and to
understand what a gift it is tobe given a gateway into how this
person sees the world.
(24:42):
But a lot of times what happenswhen we listen is we're
listening but we're making theirstory about us.
We're judging their story,we're trying to find similar
instances in our life where wemight've felt the same way.
We're literally making theirstory about our perspective.
(25:04):
But listening should be aboutgiving that person the space to
express themselves and knowingthat through listening you're
witnessing their experience.
You're showing them that youcare about how they perceive the
world.
So active listening is givingyour full attention and asking
follow-up questions andconfirming your understanding.
(25:26):
For example, let's say yourpartner talks about a difficult
day at work.
Instead of jumping in withsolutions, you ask you know you
say things like that soundstough.
How did that make you feel?
You're showing, through yourresponse, the care that you have
for them.
And here's a great actionablestep for deepening communication
Establish a no interruptionrule during your communication
(25:48):
rituals.
So what this does is it ensuresboth parties have an equal say
and fosters a culture of respectand understanding.
Okay, so that's a wrap on howto make communication your
superpower and relationships.
Trust me, if you master this,you're already miles ahead in
the love game.
So let's jump into our nextsegment, which is overcoming
(26:11):
relationship challenges.
So if you're an empath like me,you know relationships can
sometimes feel like navigating amaze while you're blindfolded.
It can be complicated.
So let's talk about overcomingsome common relationship
challenges.
First is taking on yourpartner's problems.
So this is a common pitfall forimpasse.
(26:32):
You feel so deeply thatsometimes you absorb their
issues like a sponge.
It's a fine line betweenempathy and making someone
else's problem your life mission.
And I wanna remind you thatcodependency is I'm only okay if
you're okay.
So, for example, your partnerhad a terrible day at work and
(26:55):
you find yourself losing sleep,feeling anxious and thinking of
ways to fix their work problems.
So you wanna stop right therebecause, remember, that's their
mountain to climb.
You can be supportive withoutcarrying the burden.
Next is emotional burnout.
So this happens when you giveso much that you neglect your
(27:18):
own needs.
So you're not a limitlessresource.
You've got to recharge too.
So, for example, let's say, formonths you've been the
emotional rock for your partnerthrough his job loss and one day
you snap over something trivial, you've been emotionally
depleted.
This is where self-awarenesscomes in, noticing how something
(27:39):
is affecting you, making surethat you're doing what you need
to do to care for yourself,checking in on what your
intentions are.
Common pitfall communicationbreakdown.
So sometimes the channels justget fuzzy, and it's common.
But ignoring it can snowball.
So when the lines ofcommunications crumble,
(28:01):
assumptions andmisunderstandings then take over
.
So let's say you think yourpartner should just know why
you're upset, so you shut downand then a week of cold
shoulders ensues and no one winsright.
Next is when our boundaries getblurry, especially for impasse.
When you're so attuned to yourpartner you might ignore or
(28:22):
forget your personal boundaries.
And this can also happen whenwe're trying to be ultra
accommodating so you disregardyour own comfort zones, trying
to make everybody elsecomfortable.
For example, you agree toattend every single family event
of your partner, despitefeeling overwhelmed and drained,
just because you know it'simportant to them.
(28:44):
So what's an actionable step?
So for each challenge you wantto have a go to coping mechanism
that both you and your partnerare aware of.
So for emotional burnout, maybeit's a self care day, or for
blur boundaries, perhaps it's ascheduled check in to discuss
your comfort levels.
You can tailor it to make itwork for both of you, but it's
(29:08):
just important that you havesome solution or actionable step
or go to in your toolbox tohelp you navigate each of each
one of these challenges.
So we've talked about romanticrelationships, but let's not
forget the social spear, whereimpasse can often be skating on
thin ice.
So let's go into how togracefully float through social
(29:32):
scenarios while maintaining ourempathic essence.
First one is reading the room.
So the classic empath trait ofnot just reading the room,
feeling the room, but butpractically absorbing it, so
sensing everyone's mood, can beboth a gift and a curse.
So have you ever been at aparty and suddenly felt anxious,
(29:53):
only to realize it wasn't youranxiety but someone else's?
It has happened to me more thanI can count and I've used that
as a way to not attend eventsmany times.
Next are energy vampires.
Yes, they're real and no, theydon't have fangs, but they can
drain you.
I usually don't use this word,but I thought it's Halloween
(30:16):
today when this episode is goingto be posted, so I thought, why
not?
I'll use the word, I'll useenergy vampires.
So learning to identify andshield yourself from energy
vampires is key.
So let's say you have a friendwho always turns the
conversation to her dramas andafterwards you feel drained.
So eventually you have to limitthat friendship for your own
(30:39):
well-being and maybe not evenlimit it.
Maybe it's a matter ofcommunicating and setting a
boundary, but there has to besome action that's taken to make
sure that relationship is morebeneficial to both of you.
So the exit strategy.
So maybe there's some socialsituations where sometimes you
need to ghost politely, ofcourse and again I'm using the
(31:03):
word ghost because it'sHalloween.
I don't literally mean likedisappear and not talk to anyone
ever again.
That's rude.
I would always choose to haveyou communicate if you can, so,
but having a predetermined outfor overwhelming social
situations is a lifesaver.
So this exit strategy isn'tabout even relationships.
It can be about maybe you're ata party and you're going with
(31:26):
your friend, and your friendknows that you're not going to
be able to stay for the entirefour hours, and so maybe you
have a secret code, and thatsecret code is texting your
friend a pineapple emoji to lether know it's time to regroup
and recharge, and an exitstrategy could be driving
separately.
So, again, there's all kinds ofthings that you can insert into
(31:47):
this to make sure that you'recaring for yourself.
Next is protecting your energy,and this isn't about isolating
yourself.
It's about being selectivewhere your energy goes, where
your attention goes, you get tochoose where your intention goes
when a prioritize relationshipsthat are mutual exchanges of
(32:09):
joy and energy.
I know that throughout my lifeI realized that the people that
I was surrounded with were somuch more comfortable with me
sharing my pain than they werewith me sharing my joy.
The discomfort I felt in thoserelationships when I was sharing
my wins because energy that Iwas getting mirrored back to me
(32:30):
was my wins were bragging.
So I realized that I wanted tomake sure that I was surrounded
with people that let me be thewhole of who I am.
So that meant let me be in painwhen I'm in pain and let me be
joyful and excited when thingsare going well.
So I've made sure that onSundays I carve out space to be
(32:56):
in joy.
So what's an actionable step tonurture yourself in social
scenarios?
So on your next socialgathering, I want you to set an
energy limit beforehand.
So decide how much you'll spendthere and stick to it If you
start to feel drained.
Honor that limit, trust me,your future self will thank you.
(33:18):
All right, friends.
So I know we covered a lot, butwe could have gone a lot deeper
into each segment, but thankyou for hanging out with me
today.
It has been the longest podcastepisode that we've done this
season.
But that is a wrap on today'sdeep dive.
But let me hammer home one lastcrucial point.
For impasse, healthyrelationships aren't a luxury,
(33:40):
they're a necessity.
Your emotional well-being isintrinsically linked to the
emotional climate around you.
So a rocky relationship can belike sailing in stormy seas,
while a supportive one is yoursafe harbor.
So just remember, it's crucialto pick a partner, to pick
friends, to pick acquaintanceswho not only appreciate your
(34:05):
depth but also is willing tonavigate those emotional waters
alongside of you.
So be your amazing empathicself, but also prioritize your
own well-being.
Lean into the tools we'vetalked about your impact journal
, your mindfulness practices andopen communication with your
partner.
They're your life buoys in thisocean of emotion.
(34:27):
Relationships are a give andtake, but for impasse the lines
can blur super easily, andthat's why it's so important to
stay anchored in yourself whileyou explore the depths with
someone else.
Until next time, keep thoseenergy levels high and your
emotional scuba tanks full.
(34:49):
Thank you so much, you guys,and I will see you next time.
Bye.
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