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November 3, 2025 36 mins

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If you’ve ever wondered why you become a different version of yourself during conflict… this episode is going to change the way you see those moments forever.

I’m sitting down with psychologists and authors Rachel Samson and Dr. Jessie Stern to unpack the science beneath conflict: your attachment history, your temperament, your nervous system sensitivity, and how all of this shapes the way you argue, withdraw, pursue, or shut down.

This episode is not about “how to argue better.”
It’s about understanding why you show up the way you do in the first place.

You’ll learn why some of us chase repair desperately…
why others shut down to survive the moment…
and why conflict can feel like it happens faster than your ability to think.

We also talk about emotional flooding and the moment when your nervous system takes over the conversation before your communication skills even get a chance.

And if you are a parent, you will hear how this shows up not only with your partner but also with your child and what you can do starting today to interrupt the cycle.

You will walk away from this episode with clarity, hope, and self compassion because conflict is not just about skills.
It is about state.

Get their new book on Amazon here.

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Follow Dr. Jessie on Instagram


Read our new blog post: The Science Behind How you Show up in Arguments here

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Join our Reflective Parenting Program to learn the science-based skills parents (and their kids) need to thrive: https://curiousneuron.com/reflective-parent-club/

Record your question, or share a parenting insight in a 1 min audio we will share on the podcast https://www.speakpipe.com/ReflectiveParentingPodcast

Book a spot in my calendar to chat about your challenges:

https://calendly.com/curious_neuron/chat-with-cindy-reflective-parent-club-clone


Grab a Free Resource: FREE Workbook: Staying Calm When Your Child Isn’t: A Parent’s Guide to Triggers and Emotions


Email: info@curiousneuron.com

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