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February 12, 2025 30 mins

In this terrifying episode, Trey and Chelsey dive into a 1 Star review of a Halloween Grandpa Mask from Temu. With misleading images, bizarre claims, and a final product that looks more like “roadkill than realism,” this review has the Queens howling. Complete with multimedia content, Trey even tests the mask live on camera—proving that sometimes, you get what you pay for.

Episode Highlights:

  • (00:01:02) Lodge A Complaint: Chelsey airs her frustration with Macy’s disappointing plus-size department and the struggle of finding fashionable clothing in-store.
  • (00:06:25) Review Breakdown: Trey presents Benjamin R’s scathing 1 Star review of Temu’s Halloween mask, complete with photos, a video, and a middle finger.
  • (00:20:41) The Verdict: Trey and Chelsey crown Benjamin R as a Review Queen, applauding the detailed critique and entertaining content.
  • (00:24:14) My Royal Highness: Chelsey celebrates the simple joy of feeling the wind through an open car window, likening it to freedom and connection.
  • (00:27:01) On This Week's After Show Pod: The Queens tackle a 1 Star review of the Infinite Classroom app—because the horrors don’t end with Halloween masks.

Timestamps:

  • (00:00:35) Introduction
  • (00:01:02) Lodge A Complaint
  • (00:06:25) Review Breakdown
  • (00:20:41) The Verdict
  • (00:24:14) My Royal Highness
  • (00:27:01) On This Week’s After Show Pod

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Transcript

Episode Transcript

Available transcripts are automatically generated. Complete accuracy is not guaranteed.
VOICEOVER (00:01):
Everybody's got an opinion, Every Californian and Virginian, It's so hard to tell who to trust and who to ignore, Someone's gotta settle the score., Trey and Chelsey will help you choose, Whose views win which ones lose, Online haters are coming for you, Baby, it's time to Review That Review,

TREY GERRALD (00:31):
Hello Well, hello and welcome to Review That Review.
We are the podcast that is dedicated to reviewing.
Review.
That is Chelsey Donn.
And that is Trey Gerrald.
But just call us.
The Review Queens.

(00:51):
RQC
Chelsey Goose.
Yes.
Would you like to?
Ledge a complaint.
You know I would.
All right.
So real time complaint.
I was at Macy's earlier.
I went to the plus size section.
I used to have a lot of luck at Macy's in theplus size section, but I've been very neglected.

(01:15):
Like, I don't know what'shappening over there in Macy's.
Maybe the sales are not doing that well,but the plus size section, specifically plus size dresses, I Atrocious, unacceptable.
How did this happen?
How did we get here?
I've gotten so many cute dresses there, likedresses that I've worn to weddings and people have been like, Oh my God, you look so cute.

(01:36):
Where did you get that?
And I was like, I got it at Macy's.
I have been a Macy's fan for a long time.
I think they stuck by us.
Plus size girlies.
I really appreciated being able to gointo a physical store that wasn't like Elaine Bryant where I could get Ralph Lauren or like regular brands clothes and I could try them on in the store and know whether or not I was going to like it.

(01:57):
That was not my experience today.
And then I understand it's not the salespeople'sfault, but like, it was really pathetic.
Like, it was like, whathappened to the dress section?
And they're like, Oh, it's, it'sin that little corner over there.
Like, I'm like, Oh, like buy the regular dresses.
So everything is like mixed together.
Because like, now they're doingthat, like extended sizes.
And they're like, no, no, no,like, it's not really mixed.

(02:19):
Like, it's kind of just over to the left,like, and it was this like one little rack.
And then there was a sales section and Iwas like, well, what about a sales section?
Like, is the sales section where it used tobe where I could maybe find an address on the sales section in the plus size section?
I was like, no, actually all the salesstuff is mixed together, like from like extra small to 22 or whatever.

(02:44):
And so I was like, I asked them, I'm like,well, can you like look for me and see if you can find anything in my size over there?
And we like couldn't.
And then I was like, I got to get out of here.
This is like.
Embarrassing, I'm sweating, I, I like, I, Ineed to leave and I'm just personally really Disappointed and upset that one of the places that I was like a tried and true for me is no longer.

(03:11):
I hear the complaint.
That seems like we're moving inthe opposite direction, right?
Like it's 2025.
We're supposed
to be moving towards inclusivity.
And I get it.
I mean, I think that part of the problem is notwanting to stock all these sizes, but at the same time, like, then get a better buyer, right?

(03:31):
Like, I don't need a million things.
But why is everything in the plus sizesection so matronly and disgusting?
Like no offense to people that are matronly,but like I'm not, like I'm still young, I'm still hip, I still got it, right?
Like I don't need to be looking like I'ma grandma, like literally the woman, you know, like the mother of the bride look for like people that are, or grandma of the bride look, that like people that are like, I've never worn a dress in my life wear, where it's like the like long sleeve, like she was like, do you want to wear this?

(04:05):
I literally looked at her, Iwas like, I'm not a hundred.
Okay.
No, I do not want to wear that.
So that's my complaint.
I think we could do better.
When I was there, I almost thought like, if oneday I should have a lot of money or have someone that would want to invest a lot of money into me, I would really want to have like a plus size department store because we really want to try things on and we want different styles and different looks depending on, you know, What age demographic we're in and I think there should be more stores that cater to this and how nice would it be if there was like a department store?

(04:43):
I mean, I was
gonna say, because I feel like there's a certain entertainer that I follow who's plus size and they talk a lot about their love of shopping and a lot of it has been relegated to online shopping, but that's not fair because you can't try anything on and if you buy a bunch of stuff to try it on and then return it, it's like then you're being inconvenienced and that's discrimination.

(05:05):
Or sometimes I
won't return it just because I'mlike, I don't want to deal with that.
I hear that.
And then I have stuff
that I don't even want to end up giving it away.
So anyway.
Long winded complaint, but that's my complaint.
It comes from the heart and also if you'relistening and you have some suggestions for me about where to get cute plus size clothing that's Not, no offense to them, but like, you know, outside of the, like, Lane Bryant, Torrid, no offense, like they've been there for me, but something a little bit more mainstream, please let me know.

(05:35):
Heard that.
Signed her a DMs.
Thank you.
Well, should we do it?
Should we jump into an online review, Chelsey?
I
would
love it.
Let's do it.
But before we do.
Hey you, right now watching, if you are lovingthe show, please just hit that little subscribe button, give us a like if you're having fun, hit the notification bell so you never miss an upload, drop a comment below, let us know what made you laugh, what, where should Chelsey shop, uh, what made you gasp, what, what it makes you cringe the most, tell us all of the things.

(06:06):
Yes, we love hearing your thoughts, I needto hear your thoughts, please, hello, I need to know I'm not speaking into the void.
Right in.
It's totally free.
It really helps us grow and keepsthe reviews coming your way.
So go ahead.
Do it.
We'll wait.
And as we wait
Let's
jump into the review.
Let's do it.
Review That Review.

(06:30):
As your trusty review queens, we bring in internetreviews that we feel need to be inspected.
We read you a review, we break it down, and then we rate the impact of that review together on a scale from zero to five crowns.
It's a really regal process that we like to call
Assess That Kvetch.
That's right.
And Trey, it is your turn this week.

(06:52):
What?
I'm dying.
I'm dying to know.
What have you brought in for us?
Okay, today, this is gonna be a little interesting.
It's very multimedia.
So I could not have done this beforewe had entered the video landscape.
So I will implore you, if you are one of our solidbackbone listeners who really like to enjoy this only as audio, I would implore you to implore you pop over to Spotify pop over to YouTube because we have a plethora of visuals today.

(07:21):
So you're going to want tosee what the rock is cooking.
All right.
Today, Chelsey, yeah, you and I aregoing to be rating and reviewing a one star, speaking of shopping, Teemu review.

CHELSEY DONN (07:35):
Okay.
With a video, okay.

TREY GERRALD (07:40):
So you and I are going to be rating and reviewing Benjamin R's One Star Team Review for Halloween Face Mask, Old Grandpa Shaped Latex Headgear with Wig Cosplay Tools for Party Carnival.

CHELSEY DONN (08:03):
Super.
I cannot believe how realistic this looks.
It actually is like very creepy you guys.

TREY GERRALD (08:14):
So this is really scary.
There's a whole culture of this.
There's a whole sub division, there'stons of YouTube, there's tons of Instagram people that make these like.
Quote unquote realistic AImasks that like are terrifying.
Um, oh my God,
Royal Squad.
Okay.
What do you think of this?
If you're watching, this looks so real.

(08:38):
This is creepy as all hell.
Do you think that this?
Well, we're gonna about to find out,but this can't be the actual thing.
I'm telling you.
This is a real old man's face.
All right, so here is Benjamin R'S one Star Team Review.
Um, it does denote that it's purchased.
Flesh, I guess that's where likethe color would say, so flesh.

(09:01):
If I could leave less than a star, I would.
This is absolutely crap.
This is worse than trash.
I should know better than to trust the picsand videos associated with this listing.
This is not even close toresembling anything above.

(09:21):
Shipping was extremely slow for ordering trash.
Even my trash guy comes faster than this.
Dot dot dot IDK even know what this is.
It's gross.
It looks like something someone wearswhen they go commit atrocities and want to have no facial resemblance.

(09:42):
I was hoping to get the mask in the photos todo a funny video, but what I got was little Timmy's third grade oversized Halloween mask.
That he doesn't wear anymoreand it replaces his crusty sock.
I would have rather spent this moneyon a cheap half working flashlight on the SAP dot a dot, because then I know I have a few uses before it breaks.

(10:16):
So two people have found this helpful.
And.
Uh, Benjamin has done us a big solid.
They've uploaded this image of themwearing the mask that they received, and they also uploaded a video.

CHELSEY DONN (10:35):
Oh, wow.
Okay.

TREY GERRALD (10:37):
What do you think of this photo, Chelsey, of Benjamin wearing the mask?
Oh, my God.
It literally looks like, it's,first of all, it's terrifying.
Second of all, Benjamin is giving usthe middle finger, um, in the mirror while they're wearing this mask.
It, it does sort of like, almost resemble, I meanit's hideous, but, almost resemble like when you wear a stocking over your face, if you were gonna like do a bank robbery and you were gonna like put a stocking over your face, like a clear, it's, it's horrible, it looks like the face is like, melting, the eye holes are not the same size, is that even a nose, like, it, it's, it looks like.

(11:19):
You know what, if you're on our Patreon andyou watch Trey and I, like, try on the veneers,
Yes.
This is like, if somebody putthis plastic into what we, like, a veneers mold, this is what came out.
Like, it's like not, it's not fully baked.
Right.

(11:40):
That's our first video episode.
So you guys can go back if you haven't seen it.
So now we're going to play before we actuallywrite and review the second component of Benjamin R who has uploaded this video.

VOICEOVER (11:53):
In the absolute shinshu shit is this.
This is not what I ordered.
This is absolutely not what I ordered.
Oh my God.
That's obnoxious.
That's an obnoxious amount of sounds.
Okay.
That's a lot.
That was a
mistake.

(12:16):
Oh my god.
This
looks more like I skinned like a freaking dead raccoon.
Horrible.
What the hell?
That is a dead raccoon.
That is bad guys.
This is why I can't, thisis why I have trust issues.

(12:37):
I can't trust anybody.
Look at this first image, Trey.
It's like clearly a stock image ofan old man that they somehow like, I don't even know how they did that.

TREY GERRALD (12:50):
Yeah.
They photoshopped.
I mean, okay.
Now Chelsey, you started to say earlier,there are 10 images for this product, right?
Yeah.
So then once you get tolike, once you get to image
four, it's like, is that really the guy?
Like image four looks like.
He's not even wearing a mask.

(13:12):
Like that's really him.
I know.
And these do exist.
So like, just so you know, in fulltransparency, when I found this review, this product was listed as 13.
27.
Now you can actually buy what Ibelieve this product's first image is.

(13:32):
Those are claiming to me?
They're like 1, 692.
Like, this looks
like SNL level.
You know what I mean?
That is what you
do for movies.
Yeah.
Like this is like very high quality.
Yeah.
I guess maybe the, I don't know if it is himor not him on the fourth picture, but the fourth picture looks like very realistic.

(13:54):
It's somebody wearing it.
And it's like scary.
Like it looks like an old man, like standingout in his backyard or something like that.
Then we get to the big photo still.
Okay.
Then you get to the sixth photoand it's a totally different map.
It's like not even in the same,it's laughable and strange.

(14:17):
This is definitely more similar to what Benjaminshowed us in their video and what he received.
I think it's still better quality thanwhat Benjamin received, which is saying something, but it's a different mask.
Like, how did they get away with this?
Well, that's my question because it's listed as it's the sixth image is this sudden new picture, this new mask.

(14:40):
It's crazy.
So it's in there.
It's just bizarre.
Okay.
So, all right.
I, I want to like, start here by saying, I'm gonna
have nightmares about this, Trey.
This is very
scary.
It is very scary.
Terrifying.
Um, so they use masks like this on the TV show, Pretty Little Liars.

(15:02):
So I was like, very intrigued to my PLL army.
But, um, all right.
I think that I just want to start by saying, Ithink Benjamin R is a total review queen here because They really do their due diligence.
They include an image.
They include a video.
And they're not rehashing what they wrote.

(15:22):
In the video, it's new content.
Now, I would say they, maybe Benjamin could,um, use a video editor, perhaps, like just to trim some of the loud, crunkly noises.
That was
obnoxious.
But how hardcore can I relate?
You're, you're holding your phone,you're recording and you're trying to do something that requires two hands.
Like, that's so funny.

(15:43):
Um, and also what in the shinshu shitis this is a hilarious phrase that is going to live with me forever.
I mean, it's pretty valuable here.
Yeah, I think this isdripping in value, dripping in
value.
But, but honestly, like even the shadiness of itall is like, yeah, like you deserve to be shaded.

(16:10):
If you are going to misrepresenta product to this review

CHELSEY DONN (16:13):
degree.
Also, by the way, I don't knowhow they list the images on Timu.
But like it is deep into the, there's like fiveimages that make this look like this is amazing.
So I can see a lot of people beinglike, Oh my God, this looks great.
Oh my God, this is amazing.
Oh my God.
Like you could literally, you're verifiedby your interpretation multiple times.

(16:36):
And I could see you just being like,okay, I'm going to purchase this without continually sliding through.
Like it is shady on Timu's part.
There are, they're burying the lead.

TREY GERRALD (16:48):
They literally actually, because you can see the page numbers, but they, out of 10 images, the 10th image is once again, the really high quality mask.
So even if you were to scroll thewrong way, like they are bookending with like the scam, with the fake.
So shady, but they do include the real.

(17:10):
So that's so confusing to me.
It's almost like they include it because.
They have to be like,
not lawful or like, I don't know, like actuallyillegal for them to just, you know, maybe it's like a loophole where they can be like, look, we did, you know, put the real image, but like, but even the real image, which is like sad to say is like the, like, McDonald's staged burger, where it's actually like, like paint and whatever, but like, they're just having, like, it's that version of this mask, which is saying something because it's terrible, but the mask that Benjamin receives.

(17:55):
Is like the mask in Mrs.
Doubtfire after it gets run over by the truck.
Correct.
You're right.
That's right.
Now, it's not a good look.
So Benjamin calls it trash.
It says even the shipping took forever,which is like part of Team Moo.
And also,
can you imagine waiting that long?
And
then you get
that.

(18:16):
I mean, I would be flicking off the camera too.
Yeah.
I don't
understand the whole thing about Timmy's third grade mask that like replaces his crusty sock.
Like, I don't
know, that's why I

(18:37):
was like, is that like what I think it means?
You're not going to jerk off into this mask.
It's
terrifying.
Also, are people jerking off in third grade?
I don't want to talk about it.
I don't
want to talk about
it.
Um,
but okay.
So
is this truthful or shady?
It's shady, but I think thatlike it's truthfully shady.

(18:57):
And I think it's drawing attention.
Like, Don't be fooled by these photos.
If you want this 1, 000 mask, believe me,this Teemu one for 13 is nowhere near.
And this is the problem with Teemuin general, and we know this, I'm not saying anything that we don't know.
But like, it is upsetting, becausethey do pull at your heartstrings.

(19:17):
Like, a lot of these Teemuproducts look really good.
Correct.
And you're like, oh my god, this is thesolution to my organization nightmare.
Correct.
This is the solution to my Whatever it is, like,they really make it seem like their product is better than any of the other products.
And of course, it's like a fraction of the cost.
Correct.
So, okay.

(19:39):
So, I mean, I can feel Benjamin'smiddle finger in the air.
It makes sense to me.
There were a couple of grammar issues, a little bit of spelling here and there, but overall it felt like Benjamin's vibe.
I imagine this is exceedingly typicalAnd like a very common experience.

(20:00):
I think people are going to beduped and they're counting on that.
I totally agree.
I was obviously humored by the video and thewhole like, Oh my God, the flip, the flip of it all, the drama, the length, like it was good.
I, Benjamin gave me a good laughand ultimately the impact, Trey.
I, I don't know.

(20:20):
I think I would have to crownit before I can talk about that.
Okay.
So we'll, we'll, we'll break into thecrown and we'll talk about the impact then.
All right.
Let's do it.
So, Chelsey and I each have our own set of zero to five crown cards.
Now, in an effort to be fair and not influence oneanother, we will simultaneously reveal our rating.
The queens are tabulating.

(20:41):
Time
for school.
Okay, did it too.
Okay, we made Benjamin a double review queen.
I know Trey mentioned it before.
I feel like we've been a little review queenhappy since we've done the YouTube show.
But also, I think Trey and I are just likepulling out the good reviews for you guys.

(21:02):
I think Benjamin's a review queen becausethey hit all the right notes, right?
Like, if I wasn't believing them in anyregard, not only did I get like, photos, I also got video evidence, what more do I need?
I felt emotion coming off Benjamin, I knowthey really wanted this product and they waited for it, And because they really made me feel something, and because there's no way in H E double hockey sticks, I am going to buy this mask, or even, frankly, trust Timu moving forward, I think that's a huge impact, and for that reason, I had to make Benjamin a Review Queen.

(21:36):
Why did you go all the way for Benjaminand make him, or them, a Review Queen?
I mean, I said it before, they include a video, they include a photo, they spell out the disappointment, they talk about the shipping issues.
I think Benjamin slayed it and it hadan impact on me, although I did buy it.

CHELSEY DONN (21:57):
Stop it, Trey!
You did not!
Stop!
Stop!
Oh my god.

TREY GERRALD (22:04):
I've been sitting on this mask for a while.

CHELSEY DONN (22:07):
Stop it.
Oh my god,

TREY GERRALD (22:09):
I'm gonna die.
Look at how it is creased.
Hey, that is horrible.
It is creased within an inch of its life.
Oh my god, Trey's about to put this on.
I cannot even handle it right now.
You guys, if you're listening to this.
Oh,

CHELSEY DONN (22:22):
it's so scary.
Subs
by www.
zeoranger.
co.
uk Okay, oh wow.
So this is not

TREY GERRALD (22:27):
real hair.
That is not real hair.
The, the eye holes don't really line up exactly.
What happened to the mouth?
Is there no mouth?
No, can you hear me?
I can hear you.
You're obviously muffled.
Trey's entire mouth is covered.
There's no, like, mouth hole.
Okay, yeah, tuck, he's tucking in.
You The neck, so we can geta better, okay, all right.

(22:51):
Honestly, I think it looks better on Treythan it does in like Benjamin's video.
I don't know if it's just causelike Trey knows how to rock it.
It's terrifying.
Okay.
This, yeah.
If you put on glasses, okay.
You know what?
It's better.
Oh my God.
I'm dying.
You guys actually amazing.

(23:12):
When you add the glasses.
It really does something to the entirelook, I'm not gonna lie, But, the hair is like, literally yellow, oh my god, Trey, Okay, Trey, you know what?
I think if you were really far away, Likeif you were further from camera, I might,

(23:34):
I, I don't want this to sound, wow, Okay,I sort of believe it, if you like, cover your mouth like that, Cover your nostrils.
You definitely look like a different person.
I'm not gonna lie.
I'm terrified.
I feel like Michael Jackson.
It's hard to breathe, I'll be
honest.
Yeah, I was gonna say, how'sthe breathing in there?
It's
really hard to breathe.
I mean, all you have is these twotiny holes that don't even seem to go lined up correctly for your nostrils.

(23:59):
Um, Alright, I will, yeah,
I do, I have to ask, because we have reached the most regal portion of our show.
Oh my god, Trey.
Who are you inducting today for?
My Royal Highness.
Oh my god, Trey, I can'ttake you seriously right now.
Okay, so, I am also going to induct afeeling because we've been doing that lately and I was driving home from work the other day and I had my windows down and I just decided to put my hand out.

(24:29):
And like feel the air and it wasjust such an amazing feeling.
There's something about being able tolike literally just like grasp the air in your hand while you're driving that is so satisfying and so visceral and feels so lovely.
And I don't think you get thatfeeling from anything else.
And for me, it's also sort of aspiritual experience because It's like, we know the air is there, but we don't always get to feel it like that.

(24:54):
And so there's something about feeling theinvisible that is very titillating to me.
Um, and so that was why I wanted to inductthat feeling of your arm safely, guys, safely out the car window, just catching the air.
It must be how a dog feels whenthey stick their head out a window.
It's a wonderful feeling.

(25:15):
So I'm inducting that as my Royal Highness.
It's like just.
Embracing all that exist in the world.
Right?
Doesn't it feel like I gotthe whole world in my hand.
Trey, this is so scary.
I'm not going to lie.
It's
like, um, it's like when you're a kid, it makes me think of like sticking my head out the window, like as a little kid.

(25:40):
Yeah.
Yeah.
It's just like, and just like havingthat like brush of air against your face.
The problem with Trey when he wearscostumes, I mean, is it a problem?
I don't know if it's a problem, but he just getsvery into himself and the way that he looks.
He can't stop staring at himself.
I can't stop staring at him.
I couldn't possibly look away.
I think Trey has the right idea, like, he's, he'stucked it in, he has a hat on, he has glasses on, I think if you were a little further away from camera, I could see how this could work, and, oh my god, Trey, And how much was this product?

(26:15):
Remind me.
A whopping 13.
Okay, so I feel like for 13, youcould wear this for Halloween.
And it would definitely scare some people.
Scares me.
And you
could wear this if you wanted to rob a bank, like, they're gonna know something's up.
I mean, yeah, you could wear this ifyou wanted to rob a bank, I guess.

(26:36):
Subscribe There's something about theI's, though, that's particularly, Oh my god, Trey's glasses just fogged up.
That's another end of the R
U A R Q Ferris Wheel of,
Look at my face,
isn't it neat?
Oh my god.
Thank you for joining us today.
If you like what you heardor saw, please tell a friend.

(26:58):
If you did not like what you heard or saw, please tell an enemy.
On this week's After Show Pod, we are ratingand reviewing a one star review from the App Store for the app Infinite Classroom.
Hmm.
Hmm.
I wonder why this was said.

(27:20):
If I was actually, oh my god,Trey is making out with a mask.
God, Trey.
God, Trey.
Get a room.
Um, maybe I should put it in drag.
That would be funny.
That would be funny.
You can drag him up.
He does have kind of like nice cheekbones.
Are you pulling in the cheekbones?
That's, this is, this is like, it's,

(27:42):
it's not right.
It's not right.
Me too.
I wonder.
Ignore the haters.
You're a queen, even with that fakakta mask on.
Gender nonspecific, even with the Focaccia mask on, Queen!
That's
right, bye!
Bye!

(28:03):
Sign up directly on Apple Podcasts tohear our weekly Members Only After Show.
Unlock additional benefits when you becomea Patreon member at reviewthatreview.
com slash patreon.
Follow us on all the socials at the review queensand join our mailing list@reviewthatreview.com.
Arc vetch line is open 247 at 1 8 5 0 review zero.
Don't be a ogana.

(28:24):
Call the kvetch line today.
Oh my God.
Tra it's you under there.
God, I'd forgotten that you were here.
I thought you were gone.
I thought I lost you.
I'm the baby, gotta love
me, Big purple eyes and really cuddly.
I gotta admit, I like theregular face a lot better.
Thank you, me too.
Oh my goodness, that was scary.

(28:45):
All right, Queens, tune in on Friday ifyou're a member of Patreon or all the things, and we'll see you over there.
I may try out this wig on, I may try this mask on with a wig.
We'll see how believable that
becomes.
I know, I think you really gotta workwith this mask to make it work and Trey's, Trey's the one to work it.
It could use some contouring, I think.
Yeah, if you could make this work.

(29:07):
I would love you
guys.
All right, that'd be great.
Bye.
Bye.
See you next week.
Thanks for watching, Queens.
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