Episode Transcript
Available transcripts are automatically generated. Complete accuracy is not guaranteed.
(00:02):
Everybody's got an opinion.
Every Californian in Virginia, it's sohard to tell who to cho and who to ignore.
Someone's gotta settle the score.
Trey and Chelsey will helpyou choose who's win, which.
(00:31):
Hello.
Well, hello and welcome onceagain to review that review.
We are the podcast thatis dedicated to reviewing
review.
That's Chelsey Donn
and that's Trey Gerrald.
And together we are the review queens.
(00:54):
That's right.
How was your back, by the way?
How's my back?
Yeah.
Is it okay?
Yeah, I think so.
I
just wondering.
All right, Chelsey, would you like too
lodge a complaint?
I have a complaint.
Trey, tell me you brought it up inI think a couple episodes back now.
(01:15):
Okay.
We talked about ear worms.
Ooh, right, and I have this problem.
I met her where.
Menon.
Yes.
I have a Ellen DeGeneres problemwhere I will get Not that, no, no.
I don't have that kind of Ellen DeGeneres.
No, I have the problem.
(01:36):
That's a bi menin.
Is isn't that a, that's an Ellen.
Anyway, I menon.
Yeah.
I will get something like stuckin my head, like a piece of a song
that the kids make me listen to.
Like just something willget stuck in my head.
And it will stay there all nightand it will turn into my nightmares
(01:57):
slash anxiety dreams, like Iwill not get good quality sleep.
Interesting.
I actually had to look thisup, like I was like, this has
gotta be a medical condition.
'cause I'll wake up literally nauseousbecause my brain has been repeating a
certain segment of a song on loop overand over and over again all night.
(02:19):
To the point of like, I'm gonna puke.
Like it's just like, it's so bad.
And I looked it up and theysaid like, that's an earworm.
Mm-hmm.
Like, that's like, what an earworm is.
It like crawls into your brainand it gets like lodged in
there and you gotta get it out.
And like obviously like one wayis listening to music or whatever,
(02:40):
but ugh, when that happens to me.
That's it.
The night is done.
I'm not gonna have agood day the next day.
Like, I'm not gonna sleep.
Does that happen to you?
It's a good complaint, yes.
I, there are like the silly ones thatare like commercial jingles and then
sometimes like, I just cannot stop.
Which I actually was doing somereading recently on, um, levels of OCD.
(03:07):
Mm. And that can be a signof obsessive compulsive
compulsion where you like can't.
'cause sometimes whenI'm falling asleep Yeah.
I'll just like, say random phrases inmy head that like, I don't know why.
Right.
Like, but it just comes,it pops into your head.
Yeah.
And yeah, me too.
It like, it, something pops into yourhead and you just like, can't stop
(03:29):
saying it over and over and, and,and you could be like, stop, stop.
Literally.
Yeah.
Stop it.
Worthy complaint girl because Oh,
thank you.
As
we both are control freaks, notbeing able to control ourselves.
Yeah.
Special level of hell.
That's right.
Ugh.
Thank you for hearing me andvalidating that experience.
I'm sorry you had to like keeprepeating that this was your
(03:52):
complaint over the last couple ofweeks when I first met the air worm.
That's right.
But I'm glad that you had theopportunity to let it out.
Thank you.
Thanks so much.
Yeah, I appreciate that.
And then I think I'd like to give.
Other people the same opportunity.
'cause I feel better, I feellighter, and I think someone else
should get the royal treatment.
Should we jump into an online review?
Yeah.
But just keep in mind, if we giveeveryone the opportunity, sometimes
(04:18):
we might enter scary place.
Are we going to the Twilight Zone?
The good.
Good question.
Okay.
I'm excited, but, butbefore we do, Chelsey, yeah.
I want to take this moment just to say hi.
Hello.
Thank you for watching and listening.
(04:40):
If you are on YouTube and you areenjoying this content, will you
please hit the subscribe button?
It's very simple, very quick.
It's very meaningful to us,and it's very easy for you.
It's like a. Nothing action.
That actually goes a long way.
So please hit the subscribe button.
Give us a like, if you're having somefun, go ahead and drop a little comment.
(05:04):
Sharing from your point of view,what made you laugh, what made
you gas, what made you cringe?
What spooked you?
I'm scared now.
Yeah, do it queens.
Do it now.
Love you.
Let's jump in.
Let's do it.
Review that.
Review.
(05:25):
As you know, we are yourtrustee review queens.
We bring in reviews from the internetthat we feel need to be inspected.
We read you a review.
We break it down, and then we ratethe impact of that review on a
scale from zero to five rounds.
It's a very regal processthat we like to call
assess that.
(05:48):
That's right.
And it's your turn this week, Trey,and you, you've threatened to scare us.
I'm just, I'm wondering, do youhave any like pain in your neck?
Stop asking me.
I'm scared.
Why do you keep asking me this?
Is it a chiropractor?
Well, we did chiropractoronce, do you remember?
(06:10):
We
did.
Hello?
Chelsey?
Is there like, like a. Are you
voodoo dolling me?
Is there a pain?
Maybe you're not feeling it.
Maybe I need a bigger pin in your back.
Look at you.
Look at you with your top knot.
(06:30):
And look at you with your lashes.
Lashes.
Why are
you voodoo?
Look at that necklace andlook, you're wearing swag.
I knew you'd be wearing swag.
I have a crystal to block outwhatever voodoo you're doing to me.
Why?
Very interesting that you chose that word.
Well, let me just putyou in frame over here,
(06:51):
Trey.
You know that I don'tlike things with bad juju.
How could you
do this to me?
But look how pretty you are.
I made that.
I mean, thank you for making that.
And I do look pretty, but I don't likethe fact that you're putting pins in me.
Can you take some pins out?
Well, let's get intotoday, today's review.
I'll take a few out.
Ugh,
thank you.
I mean, I've been like,I'll take that headache
(07:12):
one out.
Thank
you.
And the little like nasal congestion.
Ugh, thanks.
They do feel better.
I'll take the little cheek out.
Thank you.
Can you take the pin, all the pins?
I'll
take both of these.
Um, cheekbones out.
Thank you.
Your, the only remaining pens areones that are necessary for the wig.
Okay.
(07:32):
Okay.
And, and like that they'rekind of like earrings.
Let's just pretend they're earrings.
Yeah.
And a necklace too.
I made,
yeah.
Thank you.
It was a
bracelet that broke.
'cause I had man hands.
Anyway.
Okay, so you may have gatheredtoday we are going to be show first.
Yes.
Rating and reviewing aone star Etsy review.
(07:55):
Oh, okay.
We've never gone to Etsy.
We haven't.
I don't think you're right.
So today we're gonna berating and reviewing.
Do Lucia's one star Etsy reviewfor a $16 real voodoo doll.
New Orleans Voodoo doll.
(08:15):
Voodoo doll.
Kit Voodoo.
Pop it.
Pop it.
Kit Voodoo Dolly VoodooVoodoo doll, which is Pop it.
Okay, I am scared.
Now, clearly, um, from you can see onthe screen, I did not purchase this.
You made
that.
I made my own.
(08:36):
I love it.
I mean, I love that you made that for me,but I don't love that it's a voodoo doll.
Um, this one, this one is not the onewe're reviewing, so just keep that much.
This one is a
good one.
This is like a good, goodjuju, the one you made.
Here's a little backstory.
Just before we like get intothe review, just so that you can
have a little background on this.
(08:58):
Sellers Voodoo Do, which the shopis Luna, Zara, and they, and, and
they do sell things other thanlike the Voodoo doll, but um.
Just very quickly, this specific product.
It comes with a five inch tallvoodoo doll, fully prepared.
(09:19):
One ritual tea light candle, sevencolor pens, herbal offering jar, which
should not be removed or tampered with.
Seven pens, card andinstructions in English.
Um.
Luna Zinga says, my dolls areanointed during invoking, they
come with a distinct scent.
(09:40):
All my reviews state people lovethe scent of the ritual oil.
It is not an offensive scent in any way.
Um, and they, these are made to order.
So you leave your intentions.
Example, love, money, peace, fidelity,et cetera, and a note at checkout so that
they can incorporate them into the doll.
(10:02):
If you want a doll with a blankslate, you don't have to leave a note.
Um, the pops, which I always thoughtthe word was puppet, but pop are made
using traditional root work and they andinvoking LOAs, they are not novelty dolls.
This is a cap's real voodoo untilyou in all caps, name and awaken it.
(10:27):
Follow the simple instructions.
It's simply a doll.
You can gift it or keep it for decor.
But once awakened, do notgift this doll to anyone.
It belongs to the person who awoke it.
It is a perfect, pop it for beginners.
And then they're saying, you know, like,fabrics might be different, whatever.
Um, please read all the instructions.
Once you baptize your pop it, youcannot start over or change it.
(10:50):
Uh, and they are made to representany caps, single inten intention
that you wish a single person.
Um, and then there's so many things here.
It says it's not for children.
Keep away from pets for obvioussafety reasons, including
glass, pens, herbs, and twine.
And then it does say at the very bottom,asterisk, in order to comply with Etsy
(11:14):
terms of service, we maintain that.
We do not guarantee any metaphysicaloutcome from this product.
This product is either soldas a tool slash supply for
your personal practice or.
As a curio forentertainment purposes only.
That said dot I-Y-K-Y-K.
(11:39):
Okay.
But let's get into, do Laura dos.
So it seems
like Docia ISS trying, I mean, I don'tknow what this do see's gonna do, sorry.
But it seems like the owner of thebusiness is suggest, is suggesting
that Voodoo dolls can be positive.
Yeah.
Oh yeah.
They don't have to be bad.
Right.
Okay.
Like when I was asking if yourback was hurting and it wasn't
(12:00):
because I was stabbing yourback with a pin for good things.
Trey, you're taking this so, so seriously.
I need you to like shove somemoney up her like TT or something
like that, you don't know.
I
haven't gotten there yet.
We're not there in the show yet.
Okay.
Okay.
Okay,
so let's listen to Dole'sone star review finally.
Okay.
Okay, great.
The doll is well made.
(12:22):
The shipping was good and theinteraction with the seller, the
voodoo magic itself didn't work.
I bought four dolls and nothing.
If anything changes, Iwill update my review.
Thank you.
Okay, so in the interest of time there is.
(12:47):
There's a reply.
Okay.
Okay.
Now we do have a reply from Luna Zara,
I spent a. Hours with herattempting to explain that voodoo
(13:07):
doesn't work instantly like on tv.
It takes time, constant energy tomake things begin to move in your
direction when your intentions are huge.
The intentions of breaking up a coupleand making someone who doesn't love them.
(13:29):
Love them is so dark and involved.
You're literally trying todestroy two relationships and
lives to benefit your want.
That literally goes against allprinciples of magic, and you're a novice.
(13:50):
I won't speak on how incredibly toxicthat in itself is unless she decides to
leave feedback on the other two dolls.
This is a negative energy she put out.
Again, that just shows why magicworks for some and never will.
(14:13):
For others, people need to be very carefulwhat they're attempting to do to people.
Novices need to be realisticwith goals and abilities.
Wow.
That's intense.
(14:33):
Right?
Um, okay, so first of all, I thoughtthey said they ordered four dolls.
She did say that.
And they referencedonly three in the reply.
That's right.
Is that right?
Okay.
But maybe one of themwas something positive.
I mean, it's interesting because she'slike, I will, first of all, the fact that
(14:53):
she spent hours on the phone with her.
Did she say on the phone?
I thought that's what she said at the top.
I spent hours on the phone.
I spent hours with herattempting to explain.
Oh.
Oh, okay.
Could have been chat.
Oh, okay.
I thought it was phone.
I don't know why I assumed phone.
Maybe it was phone.
But anyway, you spent hours communicatingwith someone that's like pretty queenly.
(15:18):
Look, the reason I went into the wholespiel about what is involved in the $16
Voodoo doll is because to me, and evenin that reply, we can break it all down.
I think that Luna Zara istaking this very seriously.
Yeah, I think so too.
And I believe them.
(15:39):
I also, and you're always right on withthe intention because you even said, so
they're saying this could be for positive.
Right?
And that is what Luna is suggesting,
right?
Which like is like if
you, if you want a betteroutcome as more straight arrow
to what it is that you want.
Maybe create an intentionthat is positive.
(16:02):
So are we to believe via, via thisreply that basically they wanted to
like break somebody else up so thatthey would love them and be with them.
That's what it seems like.
They're okay.
It's two different couples, soI think do Lucia's relationship.
Maybe that's two
dolls too.
Maybe it's like I need to like, oh, both,like I have a voodoo doll of the girl.
(16:23):
'cause I want her to like bebroken up with and then of the guy.
'cause I want him to love me.
It's very possible.
Mm.
So that's it.
Yeah.
They could all be girls.
They could all be theirs.
Who knows?
You're right.
I'm gendering, but yes.
So, all right.
Let's look at the original review.
I find it to be pretty ballsy to leavea one star review on a voodoo priestess,
uh, right, that's true.
(16:44):
Good point.
But is it queenly to leave that review?
I mean.
I dunno, because I think, again, I'msomeone, obviously I have my crystal here.
I'm hexing out whatever negativethings you put in me with the pin.
I do believe in like energies and I dobelieve that the person that is receiving,
I agree with the reply and that theperson receiving this doll is the one who.
(17:11):
Brings the energy to it like it'sthem who is, they're, they're the
ones that are making this happen.
Correct.
So I already don't think it's very,very valuable because you're telling
me that all the critical things likethe communication and you know the
price and the quality are all there.
So I don't really see this asa valuable one star review.
(17:34):
I think the only negative I alreadyhad sussed out was because of them,
not necessarily because of the seller.
You know,
I brought this in 'cause I found itto be so interesting that you could
purchase a voodoo doll and, and youknow, magic and like we, we sort of have
(17:55):
dipped into many different, um, areasof this on the show over the years, but.
I guess it's all about belief andDola C clearly believes that this is
possible, so they've purchased it.
Right.
So I appreciate that they aresaying these are all the positives,
(18:17):
but like the outcome of why Ipurchased this hasn't happened.
It feels a little shady, like alittle like, um, like a threat of
like, I'll update my review if itseems that I get what I want later.
Hmm.
Right.
Um, I, I'm also curious how muchtime has passed, like how long
have you allotted for all of therelationships to change and, and you
(18:40):
could to be in love with the person.
Like, I, I don't know how long that wouldtake, um, but to believe that this will
work and then leave a one star review.
I mean, I would never leave a one starreview for someone I hired to like.
Have voodoo
break up a couple.
I would be afraid of that.
Yeah.
(19:00):
So yeah, same.
So to see a one star struck my interest.
Yeah.
'cause of the 'cause of the ballsy nature.
Um, but when we get to the reply,which I feel like most of the meet
here is in the reply, is in the replythat I do feel like they do a really
great job of sort of putting docia intheir place because I leave feeling.
(19:27):
Like Luna is very knowledgeable andthat this is like a reliable source.
And also the whole idea of likewickedness versus positivity.
I'm sort of like, oh, maybe Iwould really trust them to make
like a positive doll for me.
That's what I'm, yes, I agree with that.
(19:47):
There's like an expert.
So let's come back to the review,just 'cause we have to sort
of separate the two things.
Okay.
We already sort of touched on the value,the spelling and grammar I think was fine.
Whether or not it's truthful,shady, I think we're alluding to
the fact that it's kind of shady.
I mean, it's, it's,it's a shady bitch move.
Whether or not it's commonor typical, I don't know.
(20:10):
I kind of think it's in the eye of thebeholder, in the eye of the desire.
Right.
Were we humored
by the review?
I think it's kind of funny theybought four dolls, but yeah.
Yeah, it definitely like leaves an airof mystery like, Ooh, like what are
they planning to do with these dolls?
(20:33):
Like it's a little creepy.
Also.
Is that one purchase or is it fourindividual purchases that you would
leave four individual reviews for?
I guess it would be because you have towrite the intention separately, right?
Yeah.
Like you can't just add four to the cart.
Um.
Is it humorous or entertaining?
Not really.
Yeah.
I mean I think it's a little entertaining.
And then the ultimate impact of the reviewis I still like, I don't trust do ascia
(21:00):
over the seller even without a reply.
No.
Yeah.
So should we crown, do Ascia and then wecan get into the crowning of the owner?
Sure.
So Chelsey and I each have our ownset of zero to five crown cards.
In an effort to be fair and notinfluence one another, we will
simultaneously reveal our rating.
The queens are tabulating
(21:24):
total school.
Oh wow.
Interesting.
I'm holding up a half crowntrades, holding up two crowns.
I only went for a half crown.
'cause you know what?
I do think magic is in the eyes.
Of the creator, and I think that thecreator in this case is docia, and I
really think that the thing that they'recoming to this page to blame on the seller
(21:45):
is not really the seller's responsibility.
I think the magic comes from.
Yes, it's been anointed.
Yes, it's been created with thisintention in mind for you, but at
the end of the day, it's your energythat you put into it that really
creates the outcome, in my opinion.
And so for that reason, I couldonly give a half crown just
(22:06):
for Ballsiness alone balls.
I said two crowns, because I think it'squeenly to be ballsy and be like, the
voodoo magic itself hasn't happened yet.
Right.
I'm willing to tweak itif I see a change, right?
Um, but I think that that's valuable,but there's not a lot of meat here when
(22:29):
I look at this compared to the reply,there's so much more value in the reply.
But I'm getting that like, okay, ifI want this voodoo doll, did it work?
And it seems like it did not work.
Um, but it was well made andall the communication was good.
So I said too, 'cause it's like,you know, a little mixed messaging.
Mm.
(22:51):
Okay.
Now for Luna, Zara.
This reply.
I think it's a pretty,pretty queenly reply.
I think it's pretty queenly.
I'm still willing to chronicit 'cause I feel like I have
things to, let's do, let's do it.
The
queens are tabulating.
Total school.
Okay.
Trey made them review.
(23:11):
Queen.
I went with four crowns.
I went with four crowns.
Dangerous because I know Wow.
Because I think it's alittle bit shady to call.
I mean, I love it.
Don't get me wrong.
Like I'm enjoying thank, thank you forgiving me all the tea, but it is a little
shady from a Stop it, Trey, put it down.
(23:32):
It is a little shady from a.Business owner perspective.
Yes.
To put somebody on blast like that.
Yes.
Good point.
This is a per, this is a personal request.
I wanna think of it, thatit's almost like a therapist.
And even in the end you gave a threat,you're like, I'm only releasing this one.
Do you want me to release the other two?
Like it's a little blackmail and Idon't love that, but I do love that.
(23:55):
So yeah, foregrounds.
I said five because I'm afraid.
Um, but I also, I do thinkit's pretty queenly because
it shifted the perspective.
That's the value of havinga reply from an owner.
Yes.
Or from
the seller because it now I'mnot paying attention to the
one star I've been one over.
Um, that's right.
(24:15):
And I feel like I would buy a dolleven though I didn't, I made my
own just for the sake of the show.
Um, but.
I get your point.
I think maybe four and a half.
I mean, I'm gonna say review queen, butI, I, I also agree it's a little like,
is it unethical to like blast that tea?
Um mm-hmm.
(24:37):
Maybe a little, you know, to behonest here, does the reply if
I want to break up a marriage
mm-hmm.
To
have someone fall in love withme, does this reply make me think
this is not the seller for me?
Maybe, I don't know, maybe,maybe they, maybe you're
shooting yourself in the foot.
Unless you only wanna be doingpositive magic, which I do appreciate.
(24:59):
Yeah, that was, that wasa, that was new to me.
I, I, you asked early on, but I didnot consider voodoo dolls for positive.
Mm-hmm.
Spell.
Yeah.
But, all right, well, there we go.
Can you put the needle down?
Any specific spot?
No, Tre don't.
I'm not a voodoo priestess.
(25:20):
I have no power.
It's all a joke.
You all, we all have power.
Trey, we all, well, Iknow that have power.
Uh, all right, well we did it Queen.
Thank you for joining us for thisportion of the Voodoos, Chelsey,
keeping the positive magic in the air.
(25:40):
We've reached the mostregal portion of our show.
Is there.
Someone or something thatyou would like to induct for?
My royal line
is,
yes, I would.
Trey, thank you so much for asking.
I just wanna give a quick moment ofacknowledgement to this beautiful
wall behind me that was done by Coco.
(26:01):
Coco is on Instagram as CocoArt, but the O'S are zeros.
You can also follow them from looking.
We follow Coco.
So if you wanna go to our Instagram andfollow us and then look at who we follow.
You can find Coco that way.
This is gorgeous.
She's a local artist.
She lives in la.
She needs work and she's fantastic.
(26:23):
And if you want to order one of herpieces, she also ships slates cool.
Um, nationwide.
So I highly recommend you check her out.
She's totally a queen.
She did such an amazing job capturingmy vision and I love you, Coco.
You're the best and I'mgonna hire you again.
So go ahead, go on Instagramand follow Coco underscore
(26:44):
art with zeros instead of Os.
Love you.
How long did it take?
Honestly, not that long.
And I took, I tried toscreenshot Trey, but he was sick.
She literally drew handDrew like the whole.
Logo.
I watched her just looking at a photoof it and she captured the fonts.
She captured everything beautifullyand it didn't even take that long.
(27:07):
I mean, look like, I mean,
it's literally identical.
It's
like honestly perfect.
Like this mug.
It's, I don't know how much youguys can see in the foreground, but
it's, it's per literally perfect.
She's amazing and sheworks pretty efficiently.
Great job, Coco.
It's beautiful.
Yes, and it will be loved fora very long time, so thank you.
It will be.
(27:28):
Well, we did a queen.
That's another round on ther ru and RQ Ferris Wheel of
Thank you for joining mein my voodoo doll today.
I didn't know that we would behere together, but if you like what
you heard, please tell a friend.
And if you're gonna buy a voodoo dollof that friend, maybe do things like
give them lots of money or make themfall in love, um, or do something good.
(27:50):
Don't like threaten topoke them with needles.
Oh, it wasn't a threat, honey.
I poked it.
So if you did not like what youheard today, just go tell an enemy.
Share it with them.
Yes.
And on this week's after show pod,I wish I was doing a voodoo doll
review about you, Trey, but I'm not.
(28:13):
I'm going to be, we are going to berating, you know, that I'm buying.
We are gonna be, this dollis freaking me out rating and
reviewing a four star review.
For a what?
Try a strip club.
Ooh.
That's right.
It's a four star Google reviewfor a strip club, so if you're
(28:34):
interested to see what that's about,then hop on over to the after show.
I love it.
I can't wait to see why this was said.
Oh my God.
Can you imagine stripping.
Was one eye, the Sure.
But the intended audienceis so uninterested in you
(28:55):
that they're on their phone.
Yeah.
Oh, I'm, I'm offended just considering it.
I know.
Yes.
I do wonder why.
Please remember,
ignore the haters.
You're queen.
Gender nonspecific
queen.
That's right.
(29:16):
Love you.
Bye bye.
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(29:36):
Arc vetch line is open 247 at 1 8 5 0 review zero.
Don't be a a shug, gothe kvetch line today.
Was it a teen witch that shehad, like a little voodoo doll or
something that was really funny?
Like of the teacher sounds right.
It was like the teacher like,like crapping their pants or
something because they like.
I think it might have been Teen Witch.
(29:58):
That sounds, that sounds onbrandand with Teen White, right?
Supersonic, yeah.
Yes.
Well, I hope that, you know, alljoking aside, this is a sock that I
made with contour and um, I cut up ablack napkin and I made a top knot.
So what's
cre what's even crazier is that I waswearing really red lipstick today and I
(30:19):
even like blotted it out, which is creepy.
Because the dolls wearing red lipstickand I was like, I never wear red lipstick.
Like red, red.
But look at that contour.
You did great.
Thank you.
I liked my eyelashes as well.
Thank you.
I cut up a eyelash 'causethat's beautiful as of scale.
All right.
Well it was nice.
Queens.
We'll see you on Friday.
Yeah, see you Friday.
(30:40):
Bye.
Thanks for watching Queens.
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