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Imagine eating not because you're truly hungry, but because you're trying to fill an emotional void. That's the reality for countless people struggling with emotional eating – a challenge that expert Tricia Nelson knows intimately.
In this deeply personal conversation, Tricia shares her powerful journey of losing 50 pounds by healing the root causes of her emotional eating. She offers a refreshingly honest definition that cuts through the confusion: emotional eating is simply "eating to change how you feel." This insight immediately shifts our understanding away from willpower and toward emotional awareness.
Tricia reveals why carbohydrates and sugary foods become such powerful comfort tools – they provide a quick serotonin hit that temporarily calms our anxiety. But as she explains, this strategy ultimately backfires, especially as we age and our bodies change. For midlife women experiencing hormonal shifts and accumulated life stressors, emotional eating often intensifies, creating a frustrating cycle that diets alone cannot fix.
The conversation takes a fascinating turn when Tricia challenges popular approaches like intermittent fasting, which she's found can actually worsen emotional eating patterns. Instead, she advocates for what she calls "three meal magic" – a structured approach that allows true hunger signals to emerge and emotions to be recognized rather than numbed with food.
"Overeaters are overdoers," Tricia explains, pinpointing how busyness serves as another numbing strategy alongside food. Her practical guidance on slowing down, creating community, and finding true nourishment beyond food offers a roadmap for anyone tired of the endless diet-binge cycle.
Whether you're struggling with occasional stress eating or more serious food addiction, this episode provides compassionate insights and actionable steps toward healing your relationship with food
Please rate & review my podcast with a few kind words on Apple or Spotify. Subscribe wherever you listen, share this episode with a friend, and follow me below. This truly gives back & helps me keep bringing amazing guests & topics every week.
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Transcript
Episode Transcript
Available transcripts are automatically generated. Complete accuracy is not guaranteed.
Sandy Kruse (00:02):
Hi everyone, it's Sandy Kruse of Sandy K Nutrition
, health and Lifestyle Queen.
For years now, I've beenbringing to you conversations
about wellness from incredibleguests from all over the world.
Discover a fresh take onhealthy living for midlife and
(00:26):
beyond, one that embracesbalance and reason, without
letting only science dictateevery aspect of our wellness.
Join me and my guests as weexplore ways that we can age
gracefully, with in-depthconversations about the thyroid,
(00:48):
about hormones and otheralternative wellness options for
you and your family.
True wellness nurtures ahealthy body, mind, spirit and
soul, and we cover all of theseessential aspects to help you
live a balanced, joyful life.
(01:10):
Be sure to follow my show, rateit, review it and share it.
Always remember my friendsbalanced living works.
My friends, balanced LivingWorks.
(01:31):
Hi everyone, welcome to SandyKay Nutrition, health and
Lifestyle Queen.
Today with me, I have TriciaNelson and we're going to talk
all about emotional eating.
I figured this is a greatconversation to have.
You know a lot of people arethinking about their summer bods
and all of that, so I thoughtthis is a great way to end my
(01:57):
season and kick off with mysummer reboot series.
I've decided to start my summerreboot series a little earlier
because I have so manyincredible episodes that I've
recorded in the last year.
So some of the episodes that Iam going to replay will be all
(02:22):
about sober living Another onethat's a great topic because
many of us over consume alcoholin the summer.
So Jenn Kautch is a greatadvocate just for sober living.
I'm going to have KristineCarlson you know, don't sweat
the small stuff, she's comingback.
I'm going to have Udo Erasmus.
(02:43):
I'm going to have RichardJohnson talk to us all about
sugar.
Dr Daved Rosensweet his firstrecording with me all about
menopause.
I'm going to replay thatbecause in the fall he's coming
back to us with a brand newepisode.
I'm going to do another greatepisode, a reboot of my thyroid
(03:06):
episode with Dr Amie.
I'm going to actually haveBrenda come back to talk to us
all about beam therapy.
Evette Rose, metaphysicalanatomy.
Oh my God, you guys, I have somany incredible episodes that I
will replay for you so that youcan listen to these episodes
(03:28):
that you might've missed in thewinter on your drive to that
cottage.
It's perfect time for that.
A couple of announcements.
So I do not do any promotion,meaning I don't use agencies.
I don't have anybody to help mewith my podcast editing.
I don't use anybody to push mydownloads or my views or
(03:52):
anything or to help in that area, so I rely solely on my own
personal social media, what I dothere, and then on sharing.
So I'm going to ask you,whoever is listening to this, to
share with just one person.
So that will go so far to keepme going into the new season
(04:19):
starting in September.
The other thing that reallyhelps is for you to actually
review my podcast.
Just with a few kind words,probably on Apple, is the best
way you can give a five-starrating and then you scroll down
a little bit to write a review.
If you write a review, let meknow.
(04:41):
Please send me an email, sandy,at sandyknutritionca.
I want to personally thank youif you do that for me, because
it means the world and it's howI keep having amazing guests
come back each and every week.
I'm still going to be around, sofollow me, even though I am
(05:04):
going to be doing the summerreboot series.
Please be sure that you arefollowing me on Instagram.
I'm most active.
I'm on Instagram.
Facebook.
I have a private Facebook group.
I have my page.
I'm on Tik TOK.
It's Sandy K nutritioneverywhere.
Again, when you follow me, youactually support me and my
(05:28):
content.
I'm also a writer.
I'm very active on Substack, soyou can follow me there.
It's more about explorativewriting to help you think about
your health as it relates to youas an individual, versus
telling you how to think abouthealth.
So you can follow me onSubstack.
(05:51):
It's sandycruz, s-a-n-d-y,K-R-U-S-E dot.
Substackcom.
All of this will be in the shownotes.
I really just want to send out avery heartfelt thank you to all
of you who follow my podcastwherever you're listening.
(06:11):
You know that if you're notsure where you can follow, go to
sandycruzca, s-a-n-d-y,k-r-u-s-eca, and then you kind
of scroll down a little bit andyou'll see where my podcast is
so that you can be sure tofollow it.
I'm everywhere you guys, but Ihit five years of episodes in
(06:33):
February.
I'm calling it going into myfifth season.
It's just the way I split it upthat September.
I change over seasons, but thispodcast and I want to speak so
from the heart is solely fromthe heart, and we've come into
(06:55):
this world of AI and this worldof pay to play and we really
don't know who's paying for whattitle, to gain what status, and
what's true, what's not, andwhat I can say is that I have
built this brand primarily ahundred percent on my own, with
(07:15):
very little help, and I do thisbecause I am mostly a hero's
journey.
I'm not here to see how muchmoney I can earn from this
affiliate discount code, like alot of these other wellness
(07:38):
influencers, and I'm not tryingto put them down Listen, people
need to earn money but what Ican say is that I come from a
place of integrity.
I come from a place of myhero's journey and I come from a
place of just wanting to helpothers live and figure out what
it is they need to live ahealthier and happier life.
(08:01):
So I appreciate all of you andhappier life.
So I appreciate all of you.
I want to thank you and I'm nowgoing to cut on through to this
episode all about emotionaleating.
Thanks, hi everyone.
Welcome to Sandy K Nutrition,health and Lifestyle Queen.
Today with me, I have a specialguest.
(08:21):
Her name is Tricia Nelson, andTricia lost 50 pounds by
identifying and healing theunderlying causes of her
emotional eating, and that'swhat we're going to talk about
today.
You guys, it's going to be sucha great conversation because
Tricia is an emotional eatingspecialist and a TED Talks
(08:43):
speaker whose talk has garneredover 2 million views on YouTube.
She's the author of the numberone bestselling book, heal your
Hunger Seven Simple Steps to EndEmotional Eating.
Now Tricia is the host of thepodcast, the Heal your Hunger
(09:04):
Show, and has spent over 30years researching the hidden
causes of addictive personality.
Tricia has been featured on NBC,cbs, ktla Fox and Discovery
Health, and today, as youguessed, we're going to be
talking about emotional eating,but we're going to kind of hone
(09:26):
in also on why it seems to kindof get worse as we get older.
And I know this because there'sso many of you who listen to my
podcast, who follow me onInstagram, and we talk about
this Like it's like we never hadthis problem before.
Why do we have it now?
So it's going to be a greatconversation with that.
(09:48):
Welcome, tricia.
Thank you so much for coming.
Tricia Nelson (09:52):
Thanks for having me.
It's great to be on your show,yeah.
Sandy Kruse (09:55):
So we obviously I gave a little bit of a preamble
there that you have lost 50pounds and kept it off, like
give us a detail on your story.
I think that's very importantto the conversation.
Tricia Nelson (10:10):
You bet.
Yeah, I mean, the reason I dowhat I do is because it does
come from my personal experience.
My message comes from my mess.
So I think, as far back as Ican remember, I was an emotional
eater and I didn't really knowwhat that meant.
I was in my teens and my sistercame home one day from school
(10:32):
and announced that she was anemotional eater and I thought,
well, that's the stupidest thingI've ever heard of.
So I'm like that's not me, Ijust like food.
But once you hear something,it's hard to unhear it.
And what happened for me as Ibegan to just observe my
relationship with food and itwas different than my friends?
(10:53):
Like we'd go out to eatsomewhere, you know, and they'd
order a sandwich and it wouldcome with fries.
They'd eat their sandwich andpick at their fries.
Well, I would pick up my fry.
I mean, I would eat my friesand pick up my sandwich.
Like I'm like how?
And I'd look at them and think,how could you ever leave French
fries on your plate?
You know, that's the best part.
And so for me, I was reallysomebody who was obsessed with
(11:20):
food, obsessed with my weight.
So it was really.
I was 50 pounds overweight bythe age of 21.
So it was, but really I was 50pounds overweight by the age of
21.
And it was in part because Iwas not only an emotional eater
but I was a binge eater as welland I could eat you know 2000
calories in a sitting justsitting and watching TV, and I
would go back for more cerealand more cereal, you know, or
(11:44):
bread or chips, or you know,candies, whatever ice cream.
So I was.
I love sugar and carbs andobviously I packed on pounds
because of that.
So that's kind of how it wentfor me.
And I felt very hopelessbecause I had tried so many
diets, I did so many diets andexercise programs, but I always
(12:05):
put the weight back on.
And it really wasn't until Istarted to identify the fact
that I was an emotional eaterand what that really meant.
I met somebody who became mymentor, who helped me.
He had been morbidly obese.
He lost over 100 pounds, notthrough diet, you know, not
through medications or anything.
He lost over 100 pounds notthrough diet, you know, not
(12:26):
through medications or anything,but really more on a spiritual
journey of addressing the thingshe buried for so long.
I mean all kinds of emotions.
It just wasn't, you know, itwasn't something I had ever
dealt with.
I mean, I had experiences as achild that I just buried with
food, and so I was a snacker anda binger, and so it's just
important, you know, instead ofslapping a diet on it which will
(12:48):
never last I mean 90, 90% ofall diets fail I had to take
that more introspective journeyand do different things to heal
my stress.
And we can get into all that,but that's that was my.
That was what happened.
And then, because I was able tolose weight and keep it off, I
started helping my mentor, helpothers, and for decades that's
(13:12):
what we've been doing.
And I started my own company,heal your Hunger, about eight
years ago to help womenspecifically and to help them
online.
I now have a version for men aswell, but it was really
important that I put in acodified way and it's my book as
(13:32):
well this step-by-step processto take this journey and to heal
at a deeper level.
So that's what I've been doingand I love doing it.
Sandy Kruse (13:41):
That's great.
I mean, I think a lot of peoplewill be able to identify with
what you just said, and I justwant to preface this
conversation.
If we mentioned or if wemention anything relating to
disordered eating, we just wantI think it's important that we
(14:02):
mention this we are not givingany kind of medical advice here.
If something comes up inconversation, it's important
that we mention this.
We are not giving any kind ofmedical advice here.
If something comes up inconversation, it's for
discussion purposes only.
Please see your ownpractitioner on what might be
right for you, because I knowTricia is an expert in emotional
eating, but there's so muchmore that comes into that, like
trauma, like childhoodexperiences and all of that.
(14:27):
So I just think it's importantthat we mentioned that at the
start of the conversation.
Beautiful, yeah, yeah, yeah.
So I think it's a good place tostart.
Tricia is what is emotionaleating?
Because, like, how do youidentify that you're an
emotional eater?
Tricia Nelson (14:48):
Yeah, good question.
You know the the.
To me, the simplest and reallythe easiest way to explain
emotional eating is it's eatingto change how you feel.
It's eating to feel better.
Obviously, you don't eat tofeel worse, you eat to feel
better.
Um, you end up feeling worse ifyou go overboard, um, but
(15:09):
initially it's like huh, like Idon't, like, I'm just it's, it's
nothing you put your finger on,you're just like.
You know, oftentimes people likeI eat over boredom, you know
which.
It may be more than that, butinitially you're like I want
something to do.
So you go to the refrigeratorand you eat.
Typically, it's not actuallyboredom, it's an
(15:32):
uncomfortability with just beingwith yourself and your emotions
, you know.
Or the gaps, you know the quiet.
That's hard for people who areemotional eaters.
We like activity, we likeadrenaline, we like to be busy.
Overeaters are overdoers, sowe're on the go and when we have
that lull, it's uncomfortableand we want to fill it with
(15:52):
something.
So that's really what emotionaleating is.
And you know, as I said, somepeople are actual binge eaters,
like I was meaning.
Once you start, it's hard tostop and then you go overboard.
Then you feel stuffed and sickand mad at yourself and your
pants don't fit, you know, andthat kind of thing.
So there's really a spectrumfor emotional eating and I have
(16:14):
a quiz on my website that peoplecan take which will teach them
if they're an emotional eater ora food addict or somewhere in
between.
And so it's a spectrum and foodaddiction is on the higher end
of that spectrum and I wasdefinitely a food addict.
And if you go by the kind ofwell-known or clinical telltale
(16:41):
signs of, uh, when you start,you have trouble controlling how
much you take, like how muchyou eat or use anything, this is
kind of classic signs ofaddiction in general.
Um, if you have negativeconsequences from what you're
doing, um, if you have it, havea hard time scaling back or
(17:02):
moderating.
Um, you know, if your health isimpacted, if family members are
saying something like mom, Iwant you to be able to see my
grandkids, you know, whenthey're born, I don't want you
to die early, you know, andthings like finances are
affected.
So there's a lot ofconsequences that happen when
(17:24):
we're binge eaters that peopledon't think about, you know, or
emotional eaters, and so theaddiction side of it, when
somebody takes that quiz on mywebsite, they'll find it where
they are on that spectrum.
Some people are just regular oldemotional eaters and I think
we're all emotional eaters tosome degree, like I think we're
hardwired to have an emotionalconnection with food, so we will
(17:45):
eat.
I mean, think of the beautifulside of it, which is a mother
breastfeeding her child.
It's a bonding experience, youknow, which is over food, if you
will.
So there's good sides of it aswell.
It's just when we take it toofar.
So the two things that reallyqualify where we end up on that
spectrum the first one is theamount of control we do have.
(18:06):
Like can we pull back If we goon a cruise and it's all you can
eat, and we come home we'refive pounds heavier and we're
like, oh, I don't feel so great,I'm going to jog extra this
week and I'm going to cut outsweets and then boom, those five
pounds are off.
That's someone with a lot ofcontrol.
But there's other people likeme who will come back.
(18:27):
We're five pounds heavier andit's like we've opened the gate
and then we just can't close thegate again, and so those five
pounds turn into 10, turn to 15,and we've been in a funk for
weeks on end, and so that'ssomebody who's on the higher end
of the spectrum.
They just don't have thecontrol to course correct.
And the that's somebody who'son the higher end of the
spectrum.
They just don't have thecontrol to course correct.
And the other is consequences.
(18:48):
If we're doing this yo-yo cycleand I was a yo-yo dieter, so
I'd lose 10, gain 20, lose 15,gain 10.
I was all over the map and Ihad like five different sizes of
pants in my closet because Inever knew what size I was going
to be.
If that's more what we do,we're going to have consequences
(19:11):
, especially the longer we do it.
So you talked about women whoare older.
My experience is, and myclients are older, they're 40s,
50s, 60s, 70s, and they've beenat this for a long time.
They've been trying to getcontrol for a long time.
They've tried numerous dietsand exercise plans and their
(19:34):
body's beat up.
You know their body's beat up.
They're diabetic orpre-diabetic.
You know their hormones aredefinitely all whacked out and
there's all kinds of you knowheart issues and skin issues and
autoimmune issues and thingsthat happen when we beat our
bodies up for long enough andespecially with really crappy,
(19:56):
unhealthy food.
Sandy Kruse (19:58):
Question in terms of women.
I don't know if you know this.
What are the stats of women?
I don't know if you know this.
What are the stats of women?
I'm going to say women are moreemotional eaters than men.
Would you agree with that or no?
You would know that better thanI would.
Tricia Nelson (20:17):
Yeah, I mean, I personally I get very few
inquiries from men.
I mean I'm not a man, but Idefinitely think that's true.
I think, you know, women aremore emotional and we're also.
You know, I think we do usefood, probably for emotional
reasons as a result as well, andwe do have many hormonal shifts
(20:39):
more often than men and thatjust drives us again eating to
feel better, using food forcomfort.
I do think more women areemotional eaters than men and
more women are apt to admit itthan men, because men are a
little more disconnectedemotionally.
Sandy Kruse (20:59):
I also think that unbalanced hormones can be
somewhat of a driver as well.
I know like you're speakingmore on the emotional side, but
just as somebody who's workedwith a lot of women who have had
some issues with their hormones, that can sometimes be that
(21:22):
driver, Like they don't feelwell or even if you're just sick
, like it's almost like a way tokind of soften that feeling,
shitty feeling you know, yeah,eating to feel better Like you,
just you feel you don't feelyourself like yourself and you
just you're in a funk, you know.
Tricia Nelson (21:43):
Or you feel a little depressed and food works.
I mean, the thing is it works,you know, it works temporarily
to pick up our mood, to make usfeel better.
It's just that it comes with ahost of negative consequences,
which is often just feelingworse, like feeling worse
emotionally and physically.
I mean, if you eat too much,you feel bad.
You know you feel bad.
(22:03):
And then you have all the youknow self-recrimination.
Why did I do that?
I wish I hadn't eaten that andyou know I'm so.
I lack willpower, I'm lazy,it's like there's a whole lot of
things that come with it.
So it definitely makes us feelworse, but in the moment it
works to make us feel better.
Sandy Kruse (22:21):
Yeah, and I know that stress is a big factor in
this emotional eating landscapeand it's really interesting
because I find myself all like Idon't know if you would know
this my daughter was sick at theage of five.
She was diagnosed with cancerand during that time Tricia, it
(22:45):
was like food was like poison tome.
I couldn't eat, I just couldn't.
But other times when I can't,kind of like what you said, I
couldn't like I can't identifythat feeling and then I'm like
I'll just like eat this, eat alittle chocolate, eat a little
this little, that I need thecarbs.
(23:07):
So like, where do we even beginto identify?
How do we start?
I know you mentioned your quizand kind of finding out what
sort of an eater, but aren'tmost people kind of day-to-day
different?
Tricia Nelson (23:24):
Absolutely.
I think that what's reallyimportant is and I love that
we're having this conversationand for those listening, it's
really important that we juststart observing, like observing
our habits.
You know, just like I wasobserving that french fries were
more important to me than theywere to my friends.
It's like that carb hit, thatgreasy, yummy food that I loved.
(23:47):
That was an emotional choicefor me.
So we make emotional choicesaround food.
Even somebody who's not a bingeeater, they're like oh, I'm not
an emotional eater, but if youtend to want, you know, bread
over vegetables or pasta, youknow, if you go to a restaurant
and you're always looking forthe pasta option, the heavier
(24:08):
option, those are emotionalchoices where you prefer
potatoes over broccoli orbananas over apples or berries.
Or, you know, the heavier, morecarb or sugar dense choices are
emotional choices because thosefoods they're heavier, they're
heavier and they will coat ouremotions.
(24:30):
And again, we don't think I'mgoing to have pasta to coat my
emotions.
You know, you're like I wantpasta.
But with this conversationcomes awareness and people can
start observing that theirchoices are like like I want
comfort, I want to, I want thisfood to do something for me,
like to give me a hit that I'mlacking, you know, and so we
(24:53):
really are.
It's not just nourishment forus and it's not that we
shouldn't enjoy our food.
We must enjoy our food.
But if we're looking for morefrom that food, sometimes I'll
say to my clients, like what doyou that food you're obsessed
with?
What does it symbolize for you?
Like, what are you that foodyou're obsessed with?
What does it symbolize for you?
Like, what are you trying toget from that food?
And it's always like all theseemotional things, like I want
(25:16):
comfort, I want companionship, Iwant to feel better.
You know, I want to feel safeand grounded.
It's like all these emotionalthings we're trying to get from
just an animate object, likejust, you know, some flour and
sugar.
But we, it's like we weretrying to get something from it
that we need.
It's something we're lackingemotionally.
(25:37):
That's emotional eating.
And if we can just observewhat's really going on, it's a
great start.
Like to realize, wow, like Iwant more from this food than
the food can give me for sure.
Sandy Kruse (25:50):
That's so interesting that you talk about
like carbs or you know you weresaying bananas as opposed to.
I don't remember.
If you said berries foods, themore comfort it's giving us.
(26:13):
Have you heard that you knowwhen you know certain food?
I don't know if this is true,maybe you know, but people who
always need the crunch, likegive me a bag of chips, give me
this.
I know that salt.
See, like I'm going to look atit from a hormonal perspective.
Typically salty foods wouldindicate there's stress, anger,
(26:35):
because the salt your adrenals.
It's like a sign with theadrenals and the stress.
And then there's the like yousaid having bread, having pasta,
it's like that heavy feeling.
So does that mean you haveheavier feelings?
It's like, how do you evencorrelate that?
Tricia Nelson (26:58):
So I don't, I don't typically go down that
road of analyzing what foods doit for you, cause I think it's a
little too analytical.
So I really feel, like you know, as an overall rule, we want
the food to help us in whateverway we need help.
I mean, I liked carbs and sugar.
(27:20):
Was it the crunchy or the sweetor the you know smooth, or the
creamy, or you know, I don't,it's too in the weeds for me,
like I want food to change how Ifeel.
That's what I focus on is Idon't, and that that means I
don't want to feel what I'mfeeling, you know.
So to me, that's where weshould be focusing, not
(27:42):
analyzing, you know, how crunchyor soft or sweet our food is,
but what we're trying to escapefrom, you know, what we're
trying to distract from feeling,and to me that's really
important.
So, whatever somebody's drug ofchoice is right, I mean like
(28:03):
what the food is that theyreally crave.
It's just we all, you know,different strokes for different
folks, you know.
And so I will say there's atendency to eat the carbs and
the sugar, in part because theydo give us more of a
physiological hit, like aserotonin hit.
They do calm us, you know, andemotional eaters are anxious
(28:28):
people like anxiety runs highfor us, and so we're going to
want the foods that will calmour anxiety.
I mean, steak won't necessarilydo it, you know.
So we're.
It's not usually meat we'reovereating on, it's the carbs,
you know.
It's the carbs whichmetabolizes sugar in our bodies
and give us that quick hit.
They also give us that quickhit of energy, you know, and
(28:51):
often we're, we are stressed outand we're tired, we're, we need
a nap, but we're looking in therefrigerator for something to
nosh on.
Sandy Kruse (28:59):
You know what actually that's true when you
say that, so if I didn't have agreat sleep and I know that,
again, this can also relate toghrelin and other hormones when
you don't sleep well, so you'dlike I don't know about you, but
like if I'm not, if I don'thave a good sleep, I will,
somehow it's like I'm gonna goall day like feeling like I'm
(29:23):
going to go all day like feelinglike I'm missing something.
It's like, okay, yes, I like,and I feel that and I'll be like
, oh crap, Like I'm definitelyeating a lot of garbage today.
I didn't have a good sleep lastnight.
Or you know people who are, youknow, big drinkers of alcohol,
(29:44):
that that feeling that there'sobviously a physical reason why
you have gut rot because youdrank booze the night before.
But you know like it's like allstill tied to how you feel.
And even after a nap, like ifI'll take like a little nap,
I'll be like I'll immediatelywake up and be like I need to
eat something, you know, andit's like all these feelings are
(30:06):
always tied to food, much morethan just saying I'm hungry, I
have hunger pains, yeah Right,Like even snacking.
Tricia Nelson (30:20):
We just don't think along those lines, you
know.
We don't think along, we justwant to be comforted in that
moment, you know, or get theenergy boost in that moment.
So it's really just aboutgetting more conscious.
You know, we typically as aculture aren't tuned into our
emotions Like we have so manyemotions over everything.
Like everything that we dothroughout the day.
(30:41):
There's an emotional impact, youknow, and it may not be big.
I mean just going sitting downand, you know, having lunch or
watching television show, it'snot deeply impactful emotionally
.
But the point is, you know, aphone call, an email, a deadline
, these things all come withemotional impact and we're just
(31:02):
not tuned in.
So we're just looking for foodand we don't realize there's a
connection between our stress,how stressed out we are, how
much pressure we feel, whatthoughts are going through our
head as we're trying to make adeadline.
Like I'm so slow, why didn't Ido it sooner?
I'm not very smart, otherwiseI'd get this.
It'd be coming to me moreeasily Like there's a whole life
(31:23):
going on inside of us thatwe're not very tuned into.
Sandy Kruse (31:26):
So what is okay.
Like I, I agree, I think welive in a world of numbers.
Like we're all numbers.
Like let's numb through socialmedia scrolling.
Like I fully, I fully evenadmit to that and I'll, I'll say
to my husband I'll be like, ohshit.
Like I've been on Tik TOK for ahalf hour now.
Like, yeah, total time suck.
(31:47):
Right, like it's like a timesuck, but it's numbing.
Yeah, it's really, it's, youknow it's.
I think the awareness is key.
So how do you teach somebodyself awareness?
Tricia Nelson (32:03):
Well, you have a conversation about it, right,
like you can't unhear thisconversation, and once you hear
about numbing, you know aboutdistracting from what we're
feeling.
It at least gets us closer,like closer to the solution, and
the solution really is to tunein.
Slowing down is big, you know.
(32:24):
As I said, overeaters areoverdoers, so we tend to be
super busy.
We tend to love noise, so wemight need to have the TV on or
the radio on at all times.
We're basically afraid to slowdown and be with ourselves,
because when we're withourselves, we have emotions and
we don't want to feel Like.
(32:45):
The reason why we numb isbecause we don't want to feel
what's going on inside of us,and I, at a young age, just
decided feeling was for thebirds, I don't want to do it.
I don't want to do it, I wantnothing to do with it, and so
that's really what I needed todo is slow down.
It's hard to do, and so it'sreally important to be in
(33:08):
community with people who are onboard with it.
If you hang out with a bunch ofrunners and numbers, you're
going to be running and numbing,you know, whereas if you want
to get more conscious and youwant support to be more
conscious.
You're going to need to be incommunity with people who have
that goal as well.
You know we are who we hang outwith, and so being with people
(33:30):
who want to be more awake andconscious is going to be
important.
Not that you have to do thatall day.
You don't have to sit down and,you know, be in the lotus
position all day long meditating, but it does help to be around
people who are craving that, whoare craving that and who are
seeking that.
(33:51):
So it's not so strange ordifferent to do that.
I meditate twice a day.
I meditate because it bringsdown my stress level and I teach
this to my clients as well.
It brings down my stress, andstress is absolutely
inextricably linked to how muchwe eat, because we stress eat.
We eat to slow down, we eat togive us quick energy, and so if
(34:16):
we have a more conscious way ofreducing stress, which does
include taking on less, you knowwe can't be all things to all
people and emotion leaders wantto be, and so pulling back and
realizing it's not realistic andit's not paying off to try to
be all things to all people,having boundaries in our time,
(34:38):
pulling back and having someself-care in our day, you know,
filling your calendar withthings to do and people to help.
It's like we have to change ourlives and I often say, sandy,
that it's a living problem morethan an eating problem Like we
have to change how we live.
(35:00):
We can't be running around likea chicken with her head cut off
and not be overweight.
Like it's going to impact ourhormones, obviously, but it's
going to impact literally howmuch we eat.
Because when you're tired andyou're busy, over busy and
stressed, and then bitchy, andthen you have guilt because
(35:20):
you're bitchy, right, or you'renot spending enough time with
your kids and you're beatingyourself up about it, all that
leads to overeating, you know.
So we can't just try to people,always again trying to slap a
diet on it but or a pill now,but that's not solving the real
issue.
And the real issue is we needself care, we need to slow down,
(35:44):
we need to learn how to stoprunning from ourselves and face
what it is we think is sohorrible, which isn't horrible
at all.
We're good people.
Sandy Kruse (35:54):
Yeah, but that's also part of addictions overall.
I know this conversation isn'tabout other addictions.
Tricia Nelson (36:03):
But it definitely applies.
Sandy Kruse (36:04):
It definitely applies because one of the
things that you know, I've I'velooked at this I don't know.
Do you know who Dr BradleyNelson is?
No, no, anyway, there's.
There's a lot of thesepractitioners who talk about the
emotional aspect to pain, toproblems, to addictions and
(36:29):
everything like that, and sopeople don't want to feel so
they numb, just like what you'resaying, and it's like when you
open up the curtains and lookinside, sometimes you're like,
ooh, I don't want to look, let'sclose that back up again.
Tricia Nelson (36:47):
Nobody wants to look.
I mean it's not a comfortableBecause it's hard to look.
Let's close that back up again.
Nobody wants to look.
I mean it's not a comfortablething Because it's hard to look.
Sandy Kruse (36:52):
Tricia sometimes.
Tricia Nelson (36:53):
Yes, it's not easy, you know.
I mean, I have a whole programbased on helping people clear
the things that they're runningfrom, you know, because you
really can't do it alone,because you're just so scared.
You're so scared and you alsohave a lifetime of running, like
we've built into this habit,and so and it's not, as I said,
(37:15):
what's ever there is not soterrible.
They're just uncomfortableemotions.
Sandy Kruse (37:20):
You remember, during COVID I don't know if you
were on TikTok or InstagramDuring that time there was this
trend of women and wine o'clockand they would grab their bottle
of wine and they'd go and youknow, it would always be like in
joke, in fun, but I was like,wow, like this becoming a trend
(37:44):
is basically saying let's maskhow we're really feeling right
now during this pandemic, andmask it with wine and make it
fun and let's pretend it's noteven existing.
It's kind of the same thingwith eating.
It's like you know you havethese feelings that are
uncomfortable for you, but let'sjust, let's just have a big old
(38:07):
bag of chips and pretend itdoesn't exist.
Tricia Nelson (38:10):
Yeah, it's easy to kind of laugh it off and ha
ha, you know, um, and peopleprobably prefer to admit that
they're stress eaters beforethey admit that are emotional
eaters, cause emotional soundsmore like you're messed up or
something.
But first of all, every it'sthe same thing.
Stress eating and emotionallyeating is the same thing, and
(38:31):
and and.
The thing is, if somebodydoesn't have a big consequence
from it, they're probably notgoing to change it.
You know, like everybody'susing something, it's when it
really hurts you and when you'rean overeater and you gain
weight and you're, you know youhave to live in the cultural
shame of being overweight.
That's when you get a littlebit more interested.
(38:53):
Or if you have health issues onaccount of your eating.
I mean, I have clients whoaren't overweight at all,
they're sugar addicts orwhatever, but they have major
health issues because of theireating habits.
They're just not eating healthy.
And now with the medications,you know people can get away
with making crappy choices.
(39:14):
You know you can take amedication and just have a diet
of chocolate and pasta, you know.
So imagine what that's doing topeople's health.
You know, now there isn't aconsequence from, from an
obvious consequence of theweight, so that that presents
some other issues.
So you know it's it's hard tobe motivated if you don't have,
(39:36):
if you're not up against thewall, you know.
But hopefully with thisconversation people will want
health, you know, and they'reprobably wouldn't be listening
if they didn't.
So that's good.
Sandy Kruse (39:47):
Yeah, and the big thing too that I love people to
kind of understand why the foodthat you're eating is so
important is as we age, we havea few things going against us.
You know we have, with women,it's menopause.
(40:07):
With men, they have andropause.
They lose their.
They don't lose theirtestosterone, their testosterone
lowers.
There's a lot of things.
A lot of times digestion is anissue and it doesn't all come
into play until you're around,you know, 45, 50, a little older
.
You hear of a lot of people whohave diagnoses of autoimmune
(40:30):
disease.
You have a lot of people likecancer.
So this is why, as anutritionist, I'm always like
the building blocks areimportant, and one of the
reasons why I'm always likelisten, you can take one of
those really fancy injections,but are you supplying your body
(40:52):
with what it needs to age?
Well, how are, how, how, whatkind of quality are those
building blocks that you'regiving your body?
So that's why it's so important, so important Like the stuff,
(41:13):
like the stuff I eat.
It's not always my first choice, but I do it because I'm like I
got to support my health.
So you know like I'll buy thosebig old bags of the veggies that
are frozen from Costco and Imake sure that I grill half of a
plate of veggies always, andthen my protein and sure, maybe
I'll have a little piece ofbread, but it's not the staple.
Tricia Nelson (41:36):
Yeah, that's so important.
And what's important for thosewho are like yeah, but I want
the bread, I totally get it.
We need to nourish ourselves inother ways as a replacement.
You can't just take away thebread.
You have to be nourished inother ways and that's
nourishment we have to giveourselves.
(41:57):
So, having a morning routine, Icall it putting money in your
spiritual bank account.
You have to fill the bank withsome money so you can spend it.
If you don't, you're justwithdrawing and you're in the
red.
So start your day withmeditation, prayer, spiritual
readings like get nourished,nourish yourself with the real
(42:20):
food.
You know, soul, food,connection, community, like
these things will feed you.
You have to be fed.
You know we're hungry.
It's not food we're actuallyhungry for, so we have to get
fed.
So there's other ways to feedourselves, and then we don't
need the food, but the food likethat's what we're reaching for
(42:41):
is.
You know, we want connection,we want a feeling of connection.
I mean, last weekend I calledlike five girlfriends and I'm
like I'm lonely.
I left messages.
Of course, I got everybody'svoicemail, but I'm like I'm
lonely and I need connectionbecause I have an online
business and I don't realize I'mmissing that human connection
(43:03):
that I want more of.
I need more of because that'swhat we're really hungry for.
So I had to reach out and makeus some phone calls and my
partner was like, oh, thatsounds so needy.
I'm like, well, tough shit,like I, I, I feel I feel a need
for girlfriend time, like I needsome girlfriend time.
You know, I need that oxytocin.
I'm not getting it.
(43:23):
So we have to nourish ourselvesin the proper way, otherwise
it's just that our fallback isfood, food and wine.
Sandy Kruse (43:33):
I love that that's so important.
Though and you know, I thinkthe I don't know about you, but
the older I get having really,really enriching relationships
are important.
It's not about having 20girlfriends, it's about having
(43:53):
like three that are my besties,that we could sit down and have
a cup of coffee or a cup of teatogether and just really talk,
and having these kinds ofrelationships, I think, are very
, very important.
I couldn't agree with you more.
I personally start my day everyday with journaling, but that
(44:15):
really resonates with me because, like I'm a writer at heart, I
love to write.
So, you know, I think that thisis all really important and it
really kind of sets a foundationfor a successful day of eating.
Tricia Nelson (44:31):
I guess you could say yeah For reaching for the.
I mean it's just makes it whenyou're nourished in other ways.
It makes it easier to not reachfor food, for that quick energy
or that quick hit, you know,when you feel.
It's just easier to makechoices that are self-caring.
Sandy Kruse (44:49):
Do you ever?
I don't know if you've heard ofthis, but I remember hearing
one person, I think they were onmy podcast.
They were talking about noteating disorders but disordered
eating patterns and they said,like you know, if you're that
person that always kind of getsup and goes to the pantry, like
(45:11):
there's, there's ways in whichyou can kind of stop yourself
and think like I don't know, doyou have any tactics like that
that you help people with?
Tricia Nelson (45:21):
Yeah, really important.
First of all, in my experience,to eat three meals with nothing
in between.
So I'm just I call it threemeal magic and people love to
fast or skip meals and I'd sayit doesn't pay off.
If you're an emotional eater,it does not pay off because
you'll end up overeating 100%100%.
Sandy Kruse (45:46):
You heard it here I became insulin resistant Tricia
while doing listening to all ofthe big gurus about
intermittent fasting.
And you know why?
Because I was doing the 16-8fast, so I wouldn't eat my first
meal until like 11, 1130.
Fast, so I wouldn't eat myfirst meal until like 11, 1130.
(46:11):
And then I would fucking bingefor eight hours.
Yeah, and it would be.
I'd be like, all right, myeating windows open, let's go.
Tricia Nelson (46:14):
That's right and that's true for emotional eaters
.
It's just, it's, it's too it's,it is destabilizing and it's
another.
I mean it's just another way tobeat up our bodies.
And I'm not saying IF isterrible.
I like to have 12 hours betweenmy dinner and my breakfast.
You know, just for a little bit.
You know of benefit.
But I need three meals withlike four or five hours in
(46:37):
between each meal.
And when I do that, it's notonly a really like self-caring
way to eat, because you're notdoing these erratic swings,
you're not getting super hungry.
It's just a grounding thing.
And not only that, but you getto learn what your emotions are.
Because when you're over hungryyou don't know that you're
(47:01):
having emotions, you just feelstarvation, you just feel hungry
or deprived.
But if you have a regular wayof eating, then you start to
observe just emotions that arebetween meals.
If you're snacking all day, youhave no idea what you're
feeling.
And if you're too hungry, youhave no idea what you're feeling
.
And so the three meal magicplan is so good because you can
(47:24):
start to identify.
You know what sadness feelslike, what anxiety feels like or
whatever, and you're not justfeeding it with food.
So that's one thing, but alsoit's just a really self-loving
way to eat when we've been doingso many diets and so many
erratic plans and hacks for solong.
(47:45):
It's self-abusive, you know,and it's like would you say to
your sweet baby daughter ohhoney, you're not going to eat
for 16 hours because you'regoing to shed a few pounds.
You know.
It's like you would never dothat to your daughter.
Like, so feed yourself how youwould feed your child, right,
(48:07):
with regular meals.
Let them know you've got theirback.
You're going to pay attentionto when they need to eat again.
You're going to prepare a mealthat tastes good and has love in
it.
We don't do that for ourselves,but we would never abuse our
kids that way.
But why don't we treatourselves the way we would treat
our children?
That's what we need to startfocusing on.
Sandy Kruse (48:31):
I love that I actually what I figured out was
I had to stop listening to allthese you know, all this health
advice that was online and startpaying attention to what worked
for me and eating exactly.
It's so interesting because,like, I eat, exactly like you're
(48:54):
saying, and ever since I didthat, I know when I'm hungry,
tricia, I know.
I'm like okay, trisha, I knowI'm like okay, four or five
hours or whatever.
Tricia Nelson (49:06):
I'm like, yeah, I'm hungry now, and it feels
good to have hunger pangs.
Yes, because it means you'renot overeating.
It's like you're eating whatyour body needs, your body's.
You know digesting and usingthe energy and putting the
ingredients, nutrients, wherethey need to go.
You know using them, howthey're meant to be used.
(49:27):
And then it's like, oh, timefor more food that I can use for
nourishing my body and it's itactually feels good.
It's just scary for people youknow to feel hunger and it's
like we have to learn how todeal with hunger not starvation,
but just literal, like thosenatural hunger pangs.
And if you've been eating inwacky, erratic ways or you're a
(49:49):
binge eater, it takes some timeto get to that place of feeling
good when you feel hungry.
Sandy Kruse (49:55):
A couple of things I just want before we close off.
What's the difference betweenbeing a food addict and stress
eating?
Tricia Nelson (50:10):
being a food addict and stress eating.
Well, I would say, like I saidbefore, it's the control and the
consequences.
So those are the two telltalesigns.
So stress eating is like youeat extra because it gives you a
boost of energy and youdistract, like that's.
A lot of people do that, butthat doesn't mean you're going
to fall down the rabbit hole andeat 3,000 calories of popcorn
and ice cream in front of the TV.
So it's, if you have control,like you eat a little bit extra.
(50:34):
That's stress eating.
Food addiction is when you gointo a dark hole, you go down
the rabbit hole and you eat toomuch and you feel bad.
And also consequences, you know, is it affecting your life, you
know?
Is it like too many potatochips really, you know, ruining
your life?
But if you do that on a regularbasis because you can't deal
(50:56):
with your life or your marriage,which needs attention, you know
, then you're starting to havehealth effects because you're
eating really unhealthy foods ina perpetual way.
So it's control andconsequences.
But I guess you could be both.
Oh well, yeah, emotional eatersare stress eaters.
Food addicts are stress eaters.
(51:18):
Yeah, absolutely yeah, that'sthe thing is in my quiz.
If somebody takes that quiz andthey're on the high end of the
spectrum.
They get a higher score andthey're food addicts.
They are inherently emotionaleaters or stress eaters.
But if you're on the low end ofthe spectrum, you're not a food
addict just because you're anemotional eater.
Sandy Kruse (51:38):
So what?
Okay, if somebody was to joinyour program, what would they
expect?
Tricia Nelson (51:46):
What happens in my program is I have basically
laid out a step-by-step processfor overcoming emotional eating
and food addiction and I layeron each module.
I have modules that people gothrough, we have group calls on
Zoom.
People get coached.
I mean it's a wholecomprehensive program because
this is a big deal, you knowit's.
(52:08):
We're overcoming a lifelonghabit that, by the way, is one
of the hardest addictive habitsto overcome.
You know, people are alwayslike they have this inherent
embarrassment that they mightneed to get coached to change
their food relationship.
But to me it's the hardestrelationship of everything
(52:29):
because you have to eat.
It's not like alcohol where youcan put the plug in the jug and
you just stay out of bars.
No, you can't get away fromfood.
You have to eat three times aday.
You have to take the tiger outof the cage, pet the little
kitty and then put it back inthe cage without getting your
ass torn off.
Yeah, so it's much harder.
(52:50):
So you need more support andpeople don't mind going to the
gym and hiring a trainer to makethem do all the reps, you know.
But when it comes to ourrelationship with food, we're
like no, I got it, I'll handleit Cause there's like shame
involved and people are like oh,how bad am I that I would need
a coach.
It's like it's the hardest ofall addictive habits to overcome
(53:11):
.
You've had the habit probablyfor decades, you know, so you're
going to need some help.
So that's what I do is, um, wedo a lot in groups, like on zoom
.
People from all over the worldjoin my program and but we do it
through Zoom because you knowZoom is amazing, right, and you
can be anywhere.
But also we do it in groupsbecause people always think
(53:35):
they're the only ones who havedone the terrible, bad things.
My TEDx talk that you mentionedat the beginning.
I start out my talk talkingabout eating out of the garbage,
you know, and there's like allthese slew of comments oh my God
, I've done that.
You know.
Like you throw away your bingefoods.
You're like I can't eat anymore, I'm done with that food, I'm
never eating it again.
And then later you're like Iknow there's cookies in there,
(53:57):
you know so.
So everybody thinks they're theonly ones, and then we beat the
shit out of ourselves becauseof it and then that perpetuates
the behavior, you know.
And so in groups, women arelike oh, oh, I get like I felt
that way.
Oh, I did that thing, you know,and so it's again.
That's soul food.
Community is soul food.
(54:19):
We have to have connection andcommunity, because that's what
we're really hungry for.
So everything is in groups andwe do one-on-one coaching as
well, and then I walk peoplethrough a process of healing
which does include self-care, itdoes include community.
It includes also, like you said, the writing, the journaling.
(54:40):
People are starting to get intouch with their emotions.
You know, they write about it,they talk about it, they pray
about it.
You know there's a process forbeing able to unload those
things that we usually stuffdown with food and so.
But it takes time to kind oflearn.
It's a new behavior for us tonot just immediately, as soon as
(55:01):
we're uncomfortable, go to therefrigerator and eat.
And the longer somebody hasbeen overeating, the more help
they're going to need.
The more support they're goingto need, the more time it's
going to take to turn it around.
You know, and no diet can dothat.
I mean, we've been medicatingfor decades with food.
Sandy Kruse (55:19):
Yeah, I mean, I think a lot of people would
benefit from your program.
Let us know where they can findyou.
Tricia Nelson (55:25):
Tricia, I think a lot of people would benefit
from your program.
Let us know where they can findyou.
Tricia, Absolutely.
My website is Heal your HungerH-E-A-L.
Heal your Hunger and that's goteverything on it.
You know, my Instagram isTricia Nelson underscore, but on
my website, my TEDx talk isthere, my podcast is there, the
(55:47):
Heal your Hunger Show.
Um, access to my book is there,so it's a good.
And the quiz you know,definitely start with a quiz,
Cause that's a.
That's a great place to start,and then you get steps after
that.
Sandy Kruse (56:00):
That's so great.
Thank you so much for all youdo, Trisha.
It was really a great chattoday.
Tricia Nelson (56:06):
Absolutely.
Thanks for having me and thanksfor all you do.
Sandy Kruse (56:12):
Thank you.
I hope you enjoyed this episode.
Be sure to share it withsomeone you know might benefit
and always remember when yourate, review, subscribe, you
help to support my content andhelp me to keep going and
bringing these conversations toyou each and every week.
(56:35):
Join me next week for a newtopic, new guest, new exciting
conversations to help you liveyour best life.
Hi everyone, it's Sandy Kruse of Sandy K Nutrition
, health and Lifestyle Queen.
For years now, I've beenbringing to you conversations
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(01:31):
Hi everyone, welcome to SandyKay Nutrition, health and
Lifestyle Queen.
Today with me, I have TriciaNelson and we're going to talk
all about emotional eating.
I figured this is a greatconversation to have.
You know a lot of people arethinking about their summer bods
and all of that, so I thoughtthis is a great way to end my
(01:57):
season and kick off with mysummer reboot series.
I've decided to start my summerreboot series a little earlier
because I have so manyincredible episodes that I've
recorded in the last year.
So some of the episodes that Iam going to replay will be all
(02:22):
about sober living Another onethat's a great topic because
many of us over consume alcoholin the summer.
So Jenn Kautch is a greatadvocate just for sober living.
I'm going to have KristineCarlson you know, don't sweat
the small stuff, she's comingback.
I'm going to have Udo Erasmus.
(02:43):
I'm going to have RichardJohnson talk to us all about
sugar.
Dr Daved Rosensweet his firstrecording with me all about
menopause.
I'm going to replay thatbecause in the fall he's coming
back to us with a brand newepisode.
I'm going to do another greatepisode, a reboot of my thyroid
(03:06):
episode with Dr Amie.
I'm going to actually haveBrenda come back to talk to us
all about beam therapy.
Evette Rose, metaphysicalanatomy.
Oh my God, you guys, I have somany incredible episodes that I
will replay for you so that youcan listen to these episodes
(03:28):
that you might've missed in thewinter on your drive to that
cottage.
It's perfect time for that.
A couple of announcements.
So I do not do any promotion,meaning I don't use agencies.
I don't have anybody to help mewith my podcast editing.
I don't use anybody to push mydownloads or my views or
(03:52):
anything or to help in that area, so I rely solely on my own
personal social media, what I dothere, and then on sharing.
So I'm going to ask you,whoever is listening to this, to
share with just one person.
So that will go so far to keepme going into the new season
(04:19):
starting in September.
The other thing that reallyhelps is for you to actually
review my podcast.
Just with a few kind words,probably on Apple, is the best
way you can give a five-starrating and then you scroll down
a little bit to write a review.
If you write a review, let meknow.
(04:41):
Please send me an email, sandy,at sandyknutritionca.
I want to personally thank youif you do that for me, because
it means the world and it's howI keep having amazing guests
come back each and every week.
I'm still going to be around, sofollow me, even though I am
(05:04):
going to be doing the summerreboot series.
Please be sure that you arefollowing me on Instagram.
I'm most active.
I'm on Instagram.
Facebook.
I have a private Facebook group.
I have my page.
I'm on Tik TOK.
It's Sandy K nutritioneverywhere.
Again, when you follow me, youactually support me and my
(05:28):
content.
I'm also a writer.
I'm very active on Substack, soyou can follow me there.
It's more about explorativewriting to help you think about
your health as it relates to youas an individual, versus
telling you how to think abouthealth.
So you can follow me onSubstack.
(05:51):
It's sandycruz, s-a-n-d-y,K-R-U-S-E dot.
Substackcom.
All of this will be in the shownotes.
I really just want to send out avery heartfelt thank you to all
of you who follow my podcastwherever you're listening.
(06:11):
You know that if you're notsure where you can follow, go to
sandycruzca, s-a-n-d-y,k-r-u-s-eca, and then you kind
of scroll down a little bit andyou'll see where my podcast is
so that you can be sure tofollow it.
I'm everywhere you guys, but Ihit five years of episodes in
(06:33):
February.
I'm calling it going into myfifth season.
It's just the way I split it upthat September.
I change over seasons, but thispodcast and I want to speak so
from the heart is solely fromthe heart, and we've come into
(06:55):
this world of AI and this worldof pay to play and we really
don't know who's paying for whattitle, to gain what status, and
what's true, what's not, andwhat I can say is that I have
built this brand primarily ahundred percent on my own, with
(07:15):
very little help, and I do thisbecause I am mostly a hero's
journey.
I'm not here to see how muchmoney I can earn from this
affiliate discount code, like alot of these other wellness
(07:38):
influencers, and I'm not tryingto put them down Listen, people
need to earn money but what Ican say is that I come from a
place of integrity.
I come from a place of myhero's journey and I come from a
place of just wanting to helpothers live and figure out what
it is they need to live ahealthier and happier life.
(08:01):
So I appreciate all of you andhappier life.
So I appreciate all of you.
I want to thank you and I'm nowgoing to cut on through to this
episode all about emotionaleating.
Thanks, hi everyone.
Welcome to Sandy K Nutrition,health and Lifestyle Queen.
Today with me, I have a specialguest.
(08:21):
Her name is Tricia Nelson, andTricia lost 50 pounds by
identifying and healing theunderlying causes of her
emotional eating, and that'swhat we're going to talk about
today.
You guys, it's going to be sucha great conversation because
Tricia is an emotional eatingspecialist and a TED Talks
(08:43):
speaker whose talk has garneredover 2 million views on YouTube.
She's the author of the numberone bestselling book, heal your
Hunger Seven Simple Steps to EndEmotional Eating.
Now Tricia is the host of thepodcast, the Heal your Hunger
(09:04):
Show, and has spent over 30years researching the hidden
causes of addictive personality.
Tricia has been featured on NBC,cbs, ktla Fox and Discovery
Health, and today, as youguessed, we're going to be
talking about emotional eating,but we're going to kind of hone
(09:26):
in also on why it seems to kindof get worse as we get older.
And I know this because there'sso many of you who listen to my
podcast, who follow me onInstagram, and we talk about
this Like it's like we never hadthis problem before.
Why do we have it now?
So it's going to be a greatconversation with that.
(09:48):
Welcome, tricia.
Thank you so much for coming.
Tricia Nelson (09:52):
Thanks for having me.
It's great to be on your show,yeah.
Sandy Kruse (09:55):
So we obviously I gave a little bit of a preamble
there that you have lost 50pounds and kept it off, like
give us a detail on your story.
I think that's very importantto the conversation.
Tricia Nelson (10:10):
You bet.
Yeah, I mean, the reason I dowhat I do is because it does
come from my personal experience.
My message comes from my mess.
So I think, as far back as Ican remember, I was an emotional
eater and I didn't really knowwhat that meant.
I was in my teens and my sistercame home one day from school
(10:32):
and announced that she was anemotional eater and I thought,
well, that's the stupidest thingI've ever heard of.
So I'm like that's not me, Ijust like food.
But once you hear something,it's hard to unhear it.
And what happened for me as Ibegan to just observe my
relationship with food and itwas different than my friends?
(10:53):
Like we'd go out to eatsomewhere, you know, and they'd
order a sandwich and it wouldcome with fries.
They'd eat their sandwich andpick at their fries.
Well, I would pick up my fry.
I mean, I would eat my friesand pick up my sandwich.
Like I'm like how?
And I'd look at them and think,how could you ever leave French
fries on your plate?
You know, that's the best part.
And so for me, I was reallysomebody who was obsessed with
(11:20):
food, obsessed with my weight.
So it was really.
I was 50 pounds overweight bythe age of 21.
So it was, but really I was 50pounds overweight by the age of
21.
And it was in part because Iwas not only an emotional eater
but I was a binge eater as welland I could eat you know 2000
calories in a sitting justsitting and watching TV, and I
would go back for more cerealand more cereal, you know, or
(11:44):
bread or chips, or you know,candies, whatever ice cream.
So I was.
I love sugar and carbs andobviously I packed on pounds
because of that.
So that's kind of how it wentfor me.
And I felt very hopelessbecause I had tried so many
diets, I did so many diets andexercise programs, but I always
(12:05):
put the weight back on.
And it really wasn't until Istarted to identify the fact
that I was an emotional eaterand what that really meant.
I met somebody who became mymentor, who helped me.
He had been morbidly obese.
He lost over 100 pounds, notthrough diet, you know, not
through medications or anything.
He lost over 100 pounds notthrough diet, you know, not
(12:26):
through medications or anything,but really more on a spiritual
journey of addressing the thingshe buried for so long.
I mean all kinds of emotions.
It just wasn't, you know, itwasn't something I had ever
dealt with.
I mean, I had experiences as achild that I just buried with
food, and so I was a snacker anda binger, and so it's just
important, you know, instead ofslapping a diet on it which will
(12:48):
never last I mean 90, 90% ofall diets fail I had to take
that more introspective journeyand do different things to heal
my stress.
And we can get into all that,but that's that was my.
That was what happened.
And then, because I was able tolose weight and keep it off, I
started helping my mentor, helpothers, and for decades that's
(13:12):
what we've been doing.
And I started my own company,heal your Hunger, about eight
years ago to help womenspecifically and to help them
online.
I now have a version for men aswell, but it was really
important that I put in acodified way and it's my book as
(13:32):
well this step-by-step processto take this journey and to heal
at a deeper level.
So that's what I've been doingand I love doing it.
Sandy Kruse (13:41):
That's great.
I mean, I think a lot of peoplewill be able to identify with
what you just said, and I justwant to preface this
conversation.
If we mentioned or if wemention anything relating to
disordered eating, we just wantI think it's important that we
(14:02):
mention this we are not givingany kind of medical advice here.
If something comes up inconversation, it's important
that we mention this.
We are not giving any kind ofmedical advice here.
If something comes up inconversation, it's for
discussion purposes only.
Please see your ownpractitioner on what might be
right for you, because I knowTricia is an expert in emotional
eating, but there's so muchmore that comes into that, like
trauma, like childhoodexperiences and all of that.
(14:27):
So I just think it's importantthat we mentioned that at the
start of the conversation.
Beautiful, yeah, yeah, yeah.
So I think it's a good place tostart.
Tricia is what is emotionaleating?
Because, like, how do youidentify that you're an
emotional eater?
Tricia Nelson (14:48):
Yeah, good question.
You know the the.
To me, the simplest and reallythe easiest way to explain
emotional eating is it's eatingto change how you feel.
It's eating to feel better.
Obviously, you don't eat tofeel worse, you eat to feel
better.
Um, you end up feeling worse ifyou go overboard, um, but
(15:09):
initially it's like huh, like Idon't, like, I'm just it's, it's
nothing you put your finger on,you're just like.
You know, oftentimes people likeI eat over boredom, you know
which.
It may be more than that, butinitially you're like I want
something to do.
So you go to the refrigeratorand you eat.
Typically, it's not actuallyboredom, it's an
(15:32):
uncomfortability with just beingwith yourself and your emotions
, you know.
Or the gaps, you know the quiet.
That's hard for people who areemotional eaters.
We like activity, we likeadrenaline, we like to be busy.
Overeaters are overdoers, sowe're on the go and when we have
that lull, it's uncomfortableand we want to fill it with
(15:52):
something.
So that's really what emotionaleating is.
And you know, as I said, somepeople are actual binge eaters,
like I was meaning.
Once you start, it's hard tostop and then you go overboard.
Then you feel stuffed and sickand mad at yourself and your
pants don't fit, you know, andthat kind of thing.
So there's really a spectrumfor emotional eating and I have
(16:14):
a quiz on my website that peoplecan take which will teach them
if they're an emotional eater ora food addict or somewhere in
between.
And so it's a spectrum and foodaddiction is on the higher end
of that spectrum and I wasdefinitely a food addict.
And if you go by the kind ofwell-known or clinical telltale
(16:41):
signs of, uh, when you start,you have trouble controlling how
much you take, like how muchyou eat or use anything, this is
kind of classic signs ofaddiction in general.
Um, if you have negativeconsequences from what you're
doing, um, if you have it, havea hard time scaling back or
(17:02):
moderating.
Um, you know, if your health isimpacted, if family members are
saying something like mom, Iwant you to be able to see my
grandkids, you know, whenthey're born, I don't want you
to die early, you know, andthings like finances are
affected.
So there's a lot ofconsequences that happen when
(17:24):
we're binge eaters that peopledon't think about, you know, or
emotional eaters, and so theaddiction side of it, when
somebody takes that quiz on mywebsite, they'll find it where
they are on that spectrum.
Some people are just regular oldemotional eaters and I think
we're all emotional eaters tosome degree, like I think we're
hardwired to have an emotionalconnection with food, so we will
(17:45):
eat.
I mean, think of the beautifulside of it, which is a mother
breastfeeding her child.
It's a bonding experience, youknow, which is over food, if you
will.
So there's good sides of it aswell.
It's just when we take it toofar.
So the two things that reallyqualify where we end up on that
spectrum the first one is theamount of control we do have.
(18:06):
Like can we pull back If we goon a cruise and it's all you can
eat, and we come home we'refive pounds heavier and we're
like, oh, I don't feel so great,I'm going to jog extra this
week and I'm going to cut outsweets and then boom, those five
pounds are off.
That's someone with a lot ofcontrol.
But there's other people likeme who will come back.
(18:27):
We're five pounds heavier andit's like we've opened the gate
and then we just can't close thegate again, and so those five
pounds turn into 10, turn to 15,and we've been in a funk for
weeks on end, and so that'ssomebody who's on the higher end
of the spectrum.
They just don't have thecontrol to course correct.
And the that's somebody who'son the higher end of the
spectrum.
They just don't have thecontrol to course correct.
And the other is consequences.
(18:48):
If we're doing this yo-yo cycleand I was a yo-yo dieter, so
I'd lose 10, gain 20, lose 15,gain 10.
I was all over the map and Ihad like five different sizes of
pants in my closet because Inever knew what size I was going
to be.
If that's more what we do,we're going to have consequences
(19:11):
, especially the longer we do it.
So you talked about women whoare older.
My experience is, and myclients are older, they're 40s,
50s, 60s, 70s, and they've beenat this for a long time.
They've been trying to getcontrol for a long time.
They've tried numerous dietsand exercise plans and their
(19:34):
body's beat up.
You know their body's beat up.
They're diabetic orpre-diabetic.
You know their hormones aredefinitely all whacked out and
there's all kinds of you knowheart issues and skin issues and
autoimmune issues and thingsthat happen when we beat our
bodies up for long enough andespecially with really crappy,
(19:56):
unhealthy food.
Sandy Kruse (19:58):
Question in terms of women.
I don't know if you know this.
What are the stats of women?
I don't know if you know this.
What are the stats of women?
I'm going to say women are moreemotional eaters than men.
Would you agree with that or no?
You would know that better thanI would.
Tricia Nelson (20:17):
Yeah, I mean, I personally I get very few
inquiries from men.
I mean I'm not a man, but Idefinitely think that's true.
I think, you know, women aremore emotional and we're also.
You know, I think we do usefood, probably for emotional
reasons as a result as well, andwe do have many hormonal shifts
(20:39):
more often than men and thatjust drives us again eating to
feel better, using food forcomfort.
I do think more women areemotional eaters than men and
more women are apt to admit itthan men, because men are a
little more disconnectedemotionally.
Sandy Kruse (20:59):
I also think that unbalanced hormones can be
somewhat of a driver as well.
I know like you're speakingmore on the emotional side, but
just as somebody who's workedwith a lot of women who have had
some issues with their hormones, that can sometimes be that
(21:22):
driver, Like they don't feelwell or even if you're just sick
, like it's almost like a way tokind of soften that feeling,
shitty feeling you know, yeah,eating to feel better Like you,
just you feel you don't feelyourself like yourself and you
just you're in a funk, you know.
Tricia Nelson (21:43):
Or you feel a little depressed and food works.
I mean, the thing is it works,you know, it works temporarily
to pick up our mood, to make usfeel better.
It's just that it comes with ahost of negative consequences,
which is often just feelingworse, like feeling worse
emotionally and physically.
I mean, if you eat too much,you feel bad.
You know you feel bad.
(22:03):
And then you have all the youknow self-recrimination.
Why did I do that?
I wish I hadn't eaten that andyou know I'm so.
I lack willpower, I'm lazy,it's like there's a whole lot of
things that come with it.
So it definitely makes us feelworse, but in the moment it
works to make us feel better.
Sandy Kruse (22:21):
Yeah, and I know that stress is a big factor in
this emotional eating landscapeand it's really interesting
because I find myself all like Idon't know if you would know
this my daughter was sick at theage of five.
She was diagnosed with cancerand during that time Tricia, it
(22:45):
was like food was like poison tome.
I couldn't eat, I just couldn't.
But other times when I can't,kind of like what you said, I
couldn't like I can't identifythat feeling and then I'm like
I'll just like eat this, eat alittle chocolate, eat a little
this little, that I need thecarbs.
(23:07):
So like, where do we even beginto identify?
How do we start?
I know you mentioned your quizand kind of finding out what
sort of an eater, but aren'tmost people kind of day-to-day
different?
Tricia Nelson (23:24):
Absolutely.
I think that what's reallyimportant is and I love that
we're having this conversationand for those listening, it's
really important that we juststart observing, like observing
our habits.
You know, just like I wasobserving that french fries were
more important to me than theywere to my friends.
It's like that carb hit, thatgreasy, yummy food that I loved.
(23:47):
That was an emotional choicefor me.
So we make emotional choicesaround food.
Even somebody who's not a bingeeater, they're like oh, I'm not
an emotional eater, but if youtend to want, you know, bread
over vegetables or pasta, youknow, if you go to a restaurant
and you're always looking forthe pasta option, the heavier
(24:08):
option, those are emotionalchoices where you prefer
potatoes over broccoli orbananas over apples or berries.
Or, you know, the heavier, morecarb or sugar dense choices are
emotional choices because thosefoods they're heavier, they're
heavier and they will coat ouremotions.
(24:30):
And again, we don't think I'mgoing to have pasta to coat my
emotions.
You know, you're like I wantpasta.
But with this conversationcomes awareness and people can
start observing that theirchoices are like like I want
comfort, I want to, I want thisfood to do something for me,
like to give me a hit that I'mlacking, you know, and so we
(24:53):
really are.
It's not just nourishment forus and it's not that we
shouldn't enjoy our food.
We must enjoy our food.
But if we're looking for morefrom that food, sometimes I'll
say to my clients, like what doyou that food you're obsessed
with?
What does it symbolize for you?
Like, what are you that foodyou're obsessed with?
What does it symbolize for you?
Like, what are you trying toget from that food?
And it's always like all theseemotional things, like I want
(25:16):
comfort, I want companionship, Iwant to feel better.
You know, I want to feel safeand grounded.
It's like all these emotionalthings we're trying to get from
just an animate object, likejust, you know, some flour and
sugar.
But we, it's like we weretrying to get something from it
that we need.
It's something we're lackingemotionally.
(25:37):
That's emotional eating.
And if we can just observewhat's really going on, it's a
great start.
Like to realize, wow, like Iwant more from this food than
the food can give me for sure.
Sandy Kruse (25:50):
That's so interesting that you talk about
like carbs or you know you weresaying bananas as opposed to.
I don't remember.
If you said berries foods, themore comfort it's giving us.
(26:13):
Have you heard that you knowwhen you know certain food?
I don't know if this is true,maybe you know, but people who
always need the crunch, likegive me a bag of chips, give me
this.
I know that salt.
See, like I'm going to look atit from a hormonal perspective.
Typically salty foods wouldindicate there's stress, anger,
(26:35):
because the salt your adrenals.
It's like a sign with theadrenals and the stress.
And then there's the like yousaid having bread, having pasta,
it's like that heavy feeling.
So does that mean you haveheavier feelings?
It's like, how do you evencorrelate that?
Tricia Nelson (26:58):
So I don't, I don't typically go down that
road of analyzing what foods doit for you, cause I think it's a
little too analytical.
So I really feel, like you know, as an overall rule, we want
the food to help us in whateverway we need help.
I mean, I liked carbs and sugar.
(27:20):
Was it the crunchy or the sweetor the you know smooth, or the
creamy, or you know, I don't,it's too in the weeds for me,
like I want food to change how Ifeel.
That's what I focus on is Idon't, and that that means I
don't want to feel what I'mfeeling, you know.
So to me, that's where weshould be focusing, not
(27:42):
analyzing, you know, how crunchyor soft or sweet our food is,
but what we're trying to escapefrom, you know, what we're
trying to distract from feeling,and to me that's really
important.
So, whatever somebody's drug ofchoice is right, I mean like
(28:03):
what the food is that theyreally crave.
It's just we all, you know,different strokes for different
folks, you know.
And so I will say there's atendency to eat the carbs and
the sugar, in part because theydo give us more of a
physiological hit, like aserotonin hit.
They do calm us, you know, andemotional eaters are anxious
(28:28):
people like anxiety runs highfor us, and so we're going to
want the foods that will calmour anxiety.
I mean, steak won't necessarilydo it, you know.
So we're.
It's not usually meat we'reovereating on, it's the carbs,
you know.
It's the carbs whichmetabolizes sugar in our bodies
and give us that quick hit.
They also give us that quickhit of energy, you know, and
(28:51):
often we're, we are stressed outand we're tired, we're, we need
a nap, but we're looking in therefrigerator for something to
nosh on.
Sandy Kruse (28:59):
You know what actually that's true when you
say that, so if I didn't have agreat sleep and I know that,
again, this can also relate toghrelin and other hormones when
you don't sleep well, so you'dlike I don't know about you, but
like if I'm not, if I don'thave a good sleep, I will,
somehow it's like I'm gonna goall day like feeling like I'm
(29:23):
going to go all day like feelinglike I'm missing something.
It's like, okay, yes, I like,and I feel that and I'll be like
, oh crap, Like I'm definitelyeating a lot of garbage today.
I didn't have a good sleep lastnight.
Or you know people who are, youknow, big drinkers of alcohol,
(29:44):
that that feeling that there'sobviously a physical reason why
you have gut rot because youdrank booze the night before.
But you know like it's like allstill tied to how you feel.
And even after a nap, like ifI'll take like a little nap,
I'll be like I'll immediatelywake up and be like I need to
eat something, you know, andit's like all these feelings are
(30:06):
always tied to food, much morethan just saying I'm hungry, I
have hunger pains, yeah Right,Like even snacking.
Tricia Nelson (30:20):
We just don't think along those lines, you
know.
We don't think along, we justwant to be comforted in that
moment, you know, or get theenergy boost in that moment.
So it's really just aboutgetting more conscious.
You know, we typically as aculture aren't tuned into our
emotions Like we have so manyemotions over everything.
Like everything that we dothroughout the day.
(30:41):
There's an emotional impact, youknow, and it may not be big.
I mean just going sitting downand, you know, having lunch or
watching television show, it'snot deeply impactful emotionally
.
But the point is, you know, aphone call, an email, a deadline
, these things all come withemotional impact and we're just
(31:02):
not tuned in.
So we're just looking for foodand we don't realize there's a
connection between our stress,how stressed out we are, how
much pressure we feel, whatthoughts are going through our
head as we're trying to make adeadline.
Like I'm so slow, why didn't Ido it sooner?
I'm not very smart, otherwiseI'd get this.
It'd be coming to me moreeasily Like there's a whole life
(31:23):
going on inside of us thatwe're not very tuned into.
Sandy Kruse (31:26):
So what is okay.
Like I, I agree, I think welive in a world of numbers.
Like we're all numbers.
Like let's numb through socialmedia scrolling.
Like I fully, I fully evenadmit to that and I'll, I'll say
to my husband I'll be like, ohshit.
Like I've been on Tik TOK for ahalf hour now.
Like, yeah, total time suck.
(31:47):
Right, like it's like a timesuck, but it's numbing.
Yeah, it's really, it's, youknow it's.
I think the awareness is key.
So how do you teach somebodyself awareness?
Tricia Nelson (32:03):
Well, you have a conversation about it, right,
like you can't unhear thisconversation, and once you hear
about numbing, you know aboutdistracting from what we're
feeling.
It at least gets us closer,like closer to the solution, and
the solution really is to tunein.
Slowing down is big, you know.
(32:24):
As I said, overeaters areoverdoers, so we tend to be
super busy.
We tend to love noise, so wemight need to have the TV on or
the radio on at all times.
We're basically afraid to slowdown and be with ourselves,
because when we're withourselves, we have emotions and
we don't want to feel Like.
(32:45):
The reason why we numb isbecause we don't want to feel
what's going on inside of us,and I, at a young age, just
decided feeling was for thebirds, I don't want to do it.
I don't want to do it, I wantnothing to do with it, and so
that's really what I needed todo is slow down.
It's hard to do, and so it'sreally important to be in
(33:08):
community with people who are onboard with it.
If you hang out with a bunch ofrunners and numbers, you're
going to be running and numbing,you know, whereas if you want
to get more conscious and youwant support to be more
conscious.
You're going to need to be incommunity with people who have
that goal as well.
You know we are who we hang outwith, and so being with people
(33:30):
who want to be more awake andconscious is going to be
important.
Not that you have to do thatall day.
You don't have to sit down and,you know, be in the lotus
position all day long meditating, but it does help to be around
people who are craving that, whoare craving that and who are
seeking that.
(33:51):
So it's not so strange ordifferent to do that.
I meditate twice a day.
I meditate because it bringsdown my stress level and I teach
this to my clients as well.
It brings down my stress, andstress is absolutely
inextricably linked to how muchwe eat, because we stress eat.
We eat to slow down, we eat togive us quick energy, and so if
(34:16):
we have a more conscious way ofreducing stress, which does
include taking on less, you knowwe can't be all things to all
people and emotion leaders wantto be, and so pulling back and
realizing it's not realistic andit's not paying off to try to
be all things to all people,having boundaries in our time,
(34:38):
pulling back and having someself-care in our day, you know,
filling your calendar withthings to do and people to help.
It's like we have to change ourlives and I often say, sandy,
that it's a living problem morethan an eating problem Like we
have to change how we live.
(35:00):
We can't be running around likea chicken with her head cut off
and not be overweight.
Like it's going to impact ourhormones, obviously, but it's
going to impact literally howmuch we eat.
Because when you're tired andyou're busy, over busy and
stressed, and then bitchy, andthen you have guilt because
(35:20):
you're bitchy, right, or you'renot spending enough time with
your kids and you're beatingyourself up about it, all that
leads to overeating, you know.
So we can't just try to people,always again trying to slap a
diet on it but or a pill now,but that's not solving the real
issue.
And the real issue is we needself care, we need to slow down,
(35:44):
we need to learn how to stoprunning from ourselves and face
what it is we think is sohorrible, which isn't horrible
at all.
We're good people.
Sandy Kruse (35:54):
Yeah, but that's also part of addictions overall.
I know this conversation isn'tabout other addictions.
Tricia Nelson (36:03):
But it definitely applies.
Sandy Kruse (36:04):
It definitely applies because one of the
things that you know, I've I'velooked at this I don't know.
Do you know who Dr BradleyNelson is?
No, no, anyway, there's.
There's a lot of thesepractitioners who talk about the
emotional aspect to pain, toproblems, to addictions and
(36:29):
everything like that, and sopeople don't want to feel so
they numb, just like what you'resaying, and it's like when you
open up the curtains and lookinside, sometimes you're like,
ooh, I don't want to look, let'sclose that back up again.
Tricia Nelson (36:47):
Nobody wants to look.
I mean it's not a comfortableBecause it's hard to look.
Let's close that back up again.
Nobody wants to look.
I mean it's not a comfortablething Because it's hard to look.
Sandy Kruse (36:52):
Tricia sometimes.
Tricia Nelson (36:53):
Yes, it's not easy, you know.
I mean, I have a whole programbased on helping people clear
the things that they're runningfrom, you know, because you
really can't do it alone,because you're just so scared.
You're so scared and you alsohave a lifetime of running, like
we've built into this habit,and so and it's not, as I said,
(37:15):
what's ever there is not soterrible.
They're just uncomfortableemotions.
Sandy Kruse (37:20):
You remember, during COVID I don't know if you
were on TikTok or InstagramDuring that time there was this
trend of women and wine o'clockand they would grab their bottle
of wine and they'd go and youknow, it would always be like in
joke, in fun, but I was like,wow, like this becoming a trend
(37:44):
is basically saying let's maskhow we're really feeling right
now during this pandemic, andmask it with wine and make it
fun and let's pretend it's noteven existing.
It's kind of the same thingwith eating.
It's like you know you havethese feelings that are
uncomfortable for you, but let'sjust, let's just have a big old
(38:07):
bag of chips and pretend itdoesn't exist.
Tricia Nelson (38:10):
Yeah, it's easy to kind of laugh it off and ha
ha, you know, um, and peopleprobably prefer to admit that
they're stress eaters beforethey admit that are emotional
eaters, cause emotional soundsmore like you're messed up or
something.
But first of all, every it'sthe same thing.
Stress eating and emotionallyeating is the same thing, and
(38:31):
and and.
The thing is, if somebodydoesn't have a big consequence
from it, they're probably notgoing to change it.
You know, like everybody'susing something, it's when it
really hurts you and when you'rean overeater and you gain
weight and you're, you know youhave to live in the cultural
shame of being overweight.
That's when you get a littlebit more interested.
(38:53):
Or if you have health issues onaccount of your eating.
I mean, I have clients whoaren't overweight at all,
they're sugar addicts orwhatever, but they have major
health issues because of theireating habits.
They're just not eating healthy.
And now with the medications,you know people can get away
with making crappy choices.
(39:14):
You know you can take amedication and just have a diet
of chocolate and pasta, you know.
So imagine what that's doing topeople's health.
You know, now there isn't aconsequence from, from an
obvious consequence of theweight, so that that presents
some other issues.
So you know it's it's hard tobe motivated if you don't have,
(39:36):
if you're not up against thewall, you know.
But hopefully with thisconversation people will want
health, you know, and they'reprobably wouldn't be listening
if they didn't.
So that's good.
Sandy Kruse (39:47):
Yeah, and the big thing too that I love people to
kind of understand why the foodthat you're eating is so
important is as we age, we havea few things going against us.
You know we have, with women,it's menopause.
(40:07):
With men, they have andropause.
They lose their.
They don't lose theirtestosterone, their testosterone
lowers.
There's a lot of things.
A lot of times digestion is anissue and it doesn't all come
into play until you're around,you know, 45, 50, a little older
.
You hear of a lot of people whohave diagnoses of autoimmune
(40:30):
disease.
You have a lot of people likecancer.
So this is why, as anutritionist, I'm always like
the building blocks areimportant, and one of the
reasons why I'm always likelisten, you can take one of
those really fancy injections,but are you supplying your body
(40:52):
with what it needs to age?
Well, how are, how, how, whatkind of quality are those
building blocks that you'regiving your body?
So that's why it's so important, so important Like the stuff,
(41:13):
like the stuff I eat.
It's not always my first choice, but I do it because I'm like I
got to support my health.
So you know like I'll buy thosebig old bags of the veggies that
are frozen from Costco and Imake sure that I grill half of a
plate of veggies always, andthen my protein and sure, maybe
I'll have a little piece ofbread, but it's not the staple.
Tricia Nelson (41:36):
Yeah, that's so important.
And what's important for thosewho are like yeah, but I want
the bread, I totally get it.
We need to nourish ourselves inother ways as a replacement.
You can't just take away thebread.
You have to be nourished inother ways and that's
nourishment we have to giveourselves.
(41:57):
So, having a morning routine, Icall it putting money in your
spiritual bank account.
You have to fill the bank withsome money so you can spend it.
If you don't, you're justwithdrawing and you're in the
red.
So start your day withmeditation, prayer, spiritual
readings like get nourished,nourish yourself with the real
(42:20):
food.
You know, soul, food,connection, community, like
these things will feed you.
You have to be fed.
You know we're hungry.
It's not food we're actuallyhungry for, so we have to get
fed.
So there's other ways to feedourselves, and then we don't
need the food, but the food likethat's what we're reaching for
(42:41):
is.
You know, we want connection,we want a feeling of connection.
I mean, last weekend I calledlike five girlfriends and I'm
like I'm lonely.
I left messages.
Of course, I got everybody'svoicemail, but I'm like I'm
lonely and I need connectionbecause I have an online
business and I don't realize I'mmissing that human connection
(43:03):
that I want more of.
I need more of because that'swhat we're really hungry for.
So I had to reach out and makeus some phone calls and my
partner was like, oh, thatsounds so needy.
I'm like, well, tough shit,like I, I, I feel I feel a need
for girlfriend time, like I needsome girlfriend time.
You know, I need that oxytocin.
I'm not getting it.
(43:23):
So we have to nourish ourselvesin the proper way, otherwise
it's just that our fallback isfood, food and wine.
Sandy Kruse (43:33):
I love that that's so important.
Though and you know, I thinkthe I don't know about you, but
the older I get having really,really enriching relationships
are important.
It's not about having 20girlfriends, it's about having
(43:53):
like three that are my besties,that we could sit down and have
a cup of coffee or a cup of teatogether and just really talk,
and having these kinds ofrelationships, I think, are very
, very important.
I couldn't agree with you more.
I personally start my day everyday with journaling, but that
(44:15):
really resonates with me because, like I'm a writer at heart, I
love to write.
So, you know, I think that thisis all really important and it
really kind of sets a foundationfor a successful day of eating.
Tricia Nelson (44:31):
I guess you could say yeah For reaching for the.
I mean it's just makes it whenyou're nourished in other ways.
It makes it easier to not reachfor food, for that quick energy
or that quick hit, you know,when you feel.
It's just easier to makechoices that are self-caring.
Sandy Kruse (44:49):
Do you ever?
I don't know if you've heard ofthis, but I remember hearing
one person, I think they were onmy podcast.
They were talking about noteating disorders but disordered
eating patterns and they said,like you know, if you're that
person that always kind of getsup and goes to the pantry, like
(45:11):
there's, there's ways in whichyou can kind of stop yourself
and think like I don't know, doyou have any tactics like that
that you help people with?
Tricia Nelson (45:21):
Yeah, really important.
First of all, in my experience,to eat three meals with nothing
in between.
So I'm just I call it threemeal magic and people love to
fast or skip meals and I'd sayit doesn't pay off.
If you're an emotional eater,it does not pay off because
you'll end up overeating 100%100%.
Sandy Kruse (45:46):
You heard it here I became insulin resistant Tricia
while doing listening to all ofthe big gurus about
intermittent fasting.
And you know why?
Because I was doing the 16-8fast, so I wouldn't eat my first
meal until like 11, 1130.
Fast, so I wouldn't eat myfirst meal until like 11, 1130.
(46:11):
And then I would fucking bingefor eight hours.
Yeah, and it would be.
I'd be like, all right, myeating windows open, let's go.
Tricia Nelson (46:14):
That's right and that's true for emotional eaters
.
It's just, it's, it's too it's,it is destabilizing and it's
another.
I mean it's just another way tobeat up our bodies.
And I'm not saying IF isterrible.
I like to have 12 hours betweenmy dinner and my breakfast.
You know, just for a little bit.
You know of benefit.
But I need three meals withlike four or five hours in
(46:37):
between each meal.
And when I do that, it's notonly a really like self-caring
way to eat, because you're notdoing these erratic swings,
you're not getting super hungry.
It's just a grounding thing.
And not only that, but you getto learn what your emotions are.
Because when you're over hungryyou don't know that you're
(47:01):
having emotions, you just feelstarvation, you just feel hungry
or deprived.
But if you have a regular wayof eating, then you start to
observe just emotions that arebetween meals.
If you're snacking all day, youhave no idea what you're
feeling.
And if you're too hungry, youhave no idea what you're feeling
.
And so the three meal magicplan is so good because you can
(47:24):
start to identify.
You know what sadness feelslike, what anxiety feels like or
whatever, and you're not justfeeding it with food.
So that's one thing, but alsoit's just a really self-loving
way to eat when we've been doingso many diets and so many
erratic plans and hacks for solong.
(47:45):
It's self-abusive, you know,and it's like would you say to
your sweet baby daughter ohhoney, you're not going to eat
for 16 hours because you'regoing to shed a few pounds.
You know.
It's like you would never dothat to your daughter.
Like, so feed yourself how youwould feed your child, right,
(48:07):
with regular meals.
Let them know you've got theirback.
You're going to pay attentionto when they need to eat again.
You're going to prepare a mealthat tastes good and has love in
it.
We don't do that for ourselves,but we would never abuse our
kids that way.
But why don't we treatourselves the way we would treat
our children?
That's what we need to startfocusing on.
Sandy Kruse (48:31):
I love that I actually what I figured out was
I had to stop listening to allthese you know, all this health
advice that was online and startpaying attention to what worked
for me and eating exactly.
It's so interesting because,like, I eat, exactly like you're
(48:54):
saying, and ever since I didthat, I know when I'm hungry,
tricia, I know.
I'm like okay, trisha, I knowI'm like okay, four or five
hours or whatever.
Tricia Nelson (49:06):
I'm like, yeah, I'm hungry now, and it feels
good to have hunger pangs.
Yes, because it means you'renot overeating.
It's like you're eating whatyour body needs, your body's.
You know digesting and usingthe energy and putting the
ingredients, nutrients, wherethey need to go.
You know using them, howthey're meant to be used.
(49:27):
And then it's like, oh, timefor more food that I can use for
nourishing my body and it's itactually feels good.
It's just scary for people youknow to feel hunger and it's
like we have to learn how todeal with hunger not starvation,
but just literal, like thosenatural hunger pangs.
And if you've been eating inwacky, erratic ways or you're a
(49:49):
binge eater, it takes some timeto get to that place of feeling
good when you feel hungry.
Sandy Kruse (49:55):
A couple of things I just want before we close off.
What's the difference betweenbeing a food addict and stress
eating?
Tricia Nelson (50:10):
being a food addict and stress eating.
Well, I would say, like I saidbefore, it's the control and the
consequences.
So those are the two telltalesigns.
So stress eating is like youeat extra because it gives you a
boost of energy and youdistract, like that's.
A lot of people do that, butthat doesn't mean you're going
to fall down the rabbit hole andeat 3,000 calories of popcorn
and ice cream in front of the TV.
So it's, if you have control,like you eat a little bit extra.
(50:34):
That's stress eating.
Food addiction is when you gointo a dark hole, you go down
the rabbit hole and you eat toomuch and you feel bad.
And also consequences, you know, is it affecting your life, you
know?
Is it like too many potatochips really, you know, ruining
your life?
But if you do that on a regularbasis because you can't deal
(50:56):
with your life or your marriage,which needs attention, you know
, then you're starting to havehealth effects because you're
eating really unhealthy foods ina perpetual way.
So it's control andconsequences.
But I guess you could be both.
Oh well, yeah, emotional eatersare stress eaters.
Food addicts are stress eaters.
(51:18):
Yeah, absolutely yeah, that'sthe thing is in my quiz.
If somebody takes that quiz andthey're on the high end of the
spectrum.
They get a higher score andthey're food addicts.
They are inherently emotionaleaters or stress eaters.
But if you're on the low end ofthe spectrum, you're not a food
addict just because you're anemotional eater.
Sandy Kruse (51:38):
So what?
Okay, if somebody was to joinyour program, what would they
expect?
Tricia Nelson (51:46):
What happens in my program is I have basically
laid out a step-by-step processfor overcoming emotional eating
and food addiction and I layeron each module.
I have modules that people gothrough, we have group calls on
Zoom.
People get coached.
I mean it's a wholecomprehensive program because
this is a big deal, you knowit's.
(52:08):
We're overcoming a lifelonghabit that, by the way, is one
of the hardest addictive habitsto overcome.
You know, people are alwayslike they have this inherent
embarrassment that they mightneed to get coached to change
their food relationship.
But to me it's the hardestrelationship of everything
(52:29):
because you have to eat.
It's not like alcohol where youcan put the plug in the jug and
you just stay out of bars.
No, you can't get away fromfood.
You have to eat three times aday.
You have to take the tiger outof the cage, pet the little
kitty and then put it back inthe cage without getting your
ass torn off.
Yeah, so it's much harder.
(52:50):
So you need more support andpeople don't mind going to the
gym and hiring a trainer to makethem do all the reps, you know.
But when it comes to ourrelationship with food, we're
like no, I got it, I'll handleit Cause there's like shame
involved and people are like oh,how bad am I that I would need
a coach.
It's like it's the hardest ofall addictive habits to overcome
(53:11):
.
You've had the habit probablyfor decades, you know, so you're
going to need some help.
So that's what I do is, um, wedo a lot in groups, like on zoom
.
People from all over the worldjoin my program and but we do it
through Zoom because you knowZoom is amazing, right, and you
can be anywhere.
But also we do it in groupsbecause people always think
(53:35):
they're the only ones who havedone the terrible, bad things.
My TEDx talk that you mentionedat the beginning.
I start out my talk talkingabout eating out of the garbage,
you know, and there's like allthese slew of comments oh my God
, I've done that.
You know.
Like you throw away your bingefoods.
You're like I can't eat anymore, I'm done with that food, I'm
never eating it again.
And then later you're like Iknow there's cookies in there,
(53:57):
you know so.
So everybody thinks they're theonly ones, and then we beat the
shit out of ourselves becauseof it and then that perpetuates
the behavior, you know.
And so in groups, women arelike oh, oh, I get like I felt
that way.
Oh, I did that thing, you know,and so it's again.
That's soul food.
Community is soul food.
(54:19):
We have to have connection andcommunity, because that's what
we're really hungry for.
So everything is in groups andwe do one-on-one coaching as
well, and then I walk peoplethrough a process of healing
which does include self-care, itdoes include community.
It includes also, like you said, the writing, the journaling.
(54:40):
People are starting to get intouch with their emotions.
You know, they write about it,they talk about it, they pray
about it.
You know there's a process forbeing able to unload those
things that we usually stuffdown with food and so.
But it takes time to kind oflearn.
It's a new behavior for us tonot just immediately, as soon as
(55:01):
we're uncomfortable, go to therefrigerator and eat.
And the longer somebody hasbeen overeating, the more help
they're going to need.
The more support they're goingto need, the more time it's
going to take to turn it around.
You know, and no diet can dothat.
I mean, we've been medicatingfor decades with food.
Sandy Kruse (55:19):
Yeah, I mean, I think a lot of people would
benefit from your program.
Let us know where they can findyou.
Tricia Nelson (55:25):
Tricia, I think a lot of people would benefit
from your program.
Let us know where they can findyou.
Tricia, Absolutely.
My website is Heal your HungerH-E-A-L.
Heal your Hunger and that's goteverything on it.
You know, my Instagram isTricia Nelson underscore, but on
my website, my TEDx talk isthere, my podcast is there, the
(55:47):
Heal your Hunger Show.
Um, access to my book is there,so it's a good.
And the quiz you know,definitely start with a quiz,
Cause that's a.
That's a great place to start,and then you get steps after
that.
Sandy Kruse (56:00):
That's so great.
Thank you so much for all youdo, Trisha.
It was really a great chattoday.
Tricia Nelson (56:06):
Absolutely.
Thanks for having me and thanksfor all you do.
Sandy Kruse (56:12):
Thank you.
I hope you enjoyed this episode.
Be sure to share it withsomeone you know might benefit
and always remember when yourate, review, subscribe, you
help to support my content andhelp me to keep going and
bringing these conversations toyou each and every week.
(56:35):
Join me next week for a newtopic, new guest, new exciting
conversations to help you liveyour best life.
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