Episode Transcript
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Speaker 1 (00:00):
Let me guess You're
staring at the upcoming end of
the semester.
You're wondering if you've doneenough.
You've worked long hours,you've had hard conversations
and you've had some nights whereyou've tossed and turned,
worrying about situations orstudents on campus.
(00:21):
But now, as you reflect on theyears so far, you find yourself
asking have I really made animpact?
It's a tough feeling, right,and I don't think that it's an
uncommon question.
But here's the thing most of usoverlook your magic as a school
(00:44):
counselor doesn't lie in thesebig, sweeping, grand gestures.
It's not about solvingeverybody's problems or hitting
every target.
The real power of your work isin the small, quiet moments, the
ones that often go unnoticedbut ripple through your
(01:05):
students' lives in ways that youmay never even see.
Today, on the podcast, I wantto talk about why those small
moments matter so much, why yourbrain is hardwired to overlook
them, and how practicinggratitude can help you reconnect
(01:26):
with your purpose.
So if you're feeling unseen,undervalued or just straight up
exhausted, I'm with you, andthis is an episode you are not
going to want to miss, becausewe need to find the meaning
behind your work.
It matters more than you think.
(01:51):
Welcome back, my friend, to theSchool for School Counselors
podcast.
I'm Steph Johnson, your host, afull-time school counselor just
like you, on a mission to makeschool counseling more
sustainable and more enjoyable,because you yes you you deserve
support, validation andempowerment on the regular, and
(02:16):
through this podcast and ourSchool for School Counselors
community, we seek to bridge thegap between what grad school
taught you and what's reallygoing on on your campus.
My goal is to help you feelcompetent, connected and
inspired to make a difference,even if you are working in a
(02:37):
super challenging school.
Hey, before we jump intotoday's topic, I want to take a
moment to share a wonderfulreview from one of our listeners
, sb8515, who said I listened tothis podcast throughout my
internship and into my newcareer as an elementary school
counselor.
(02:57):
I find it to be uplifting,educational and relevant to the
field of school counseling.
Educational and relevant to thefield of school counseling.
It is an overwhelming job, buteach time I listen to an episode
, I feel empowered to go to workand make change in my school
and in my community.
I would recommend this podcastand have to many co-workers and
(03:20):
colleagues.
Keep up the good work.
Thank you so much, sb8515.
Reviews like that remind me whyI do what I do and I'm so
grateful for each and everyperson who listens to this
podcast, but also to those whosupport it.
So if you haven't yet, couldyou hit pause and go leave a
(03:44):
rating or review in your podcastplayer so that we can help get
the word out about this podcastto support and empower even more
of our colleagues, becausey'all, that's what this is all
about.
All right, so getting back tothe topic at hand, let me tell
(04:04):
you about a student we had onour campus once.
They had a name that everybodyknew.
Even if those people weren'tconnected to that student's
grade, everybody knew them.
They had a reputation aroundcampus and we worked so hard to
make progress with the studentDaily check-ins, behavior plans,
(04:28):
individual counseling, smallgroup counseling, everything we
could think of and just as westarted to see some glimmers of
change, the student moved,student moved.
(04:49):
I felt so defeated, I'll behonest.
I just really felt down aboutit.
All this time andintentionality poured into the
student, hoping to see somereturns before they left our
campus.
And then one day, suddenly theywere gone and I had to really
remind myself.
I had to really remind myself.
Our brains are wired to focus onthe negative.
(05:10):
Research by Baumeister andcolleagues shows that bad
experiences stick with us longerthan the good ones.
And so on my campus, when thisstudent left us, we were so
caught up in what hadn't goneright and all of the things left
undone that we missed the smallvictories.
We overlooked the trust that webuilt with not only the student
(05:33):
but the parent.
We overlooked the moments thatwe helped that student feel seen
and feel heard.
Y'all those moments matter,even if we don't get to the end
result that we're anticipating.
These moments are like seedsthey get planted in the soil and
(05:55):
we may never see them grow, butthey're there and they're
waiting for the right conditionswhen they can just be
completely, begin to flourish.
That's why we do what we doright.
So let's talk about gratitude,and I'm not talking about the
(06:16):
surface level gratitudeconversation you hear most
everywhere else, where you lista few things you're thankful for
and then you call it a day.
Real gratitude and realgratitude practices rewire your
brain and studies show thatgratitude journaling for just
(06:36):
five minutes a day can increaseyour happiness levels by 10%.
Y'all that is statisticallysignificant in terms of your
emotional well-being, but itdoesn't stop there.
Gratitude activates the brain'sreward system.
(06:57):
When you engage in gratitude,dopamine and serotonin start
flowing, and those are thosefeel-good chemicals that we all
need.
And even more, gratitudestrengthens the ventromedial
prefrontal cortex.
Say that three times fast.
That's the part of your brainthat's tied to empathy and
(07:21):
prosocial behavior, brain that'stied to empathy and pro-social
behavior.
So really intentional gratitudemakes you kinder, more
resilient and more connected,and really, at the end of the
day, isn't that what we all wantas school counselors?
So how do you make gratitudework for you?
(07:43):
How do we go beyond just thesimple list, three things you're
grateful for every day?
Yeah, man, that didn't help.
That didn't really changeanything for me.
It just gave me something elseto do.
You ever felt like that?
Let me introduce you to an ideacalled gratitude expansion.
It is so simple, but alsoextremely powerful.
(08:07):
First you start with a smallwin.
Let's say, a student who hasbeen very reluctant to work with
you has finally started to openup, write it down and then
expand it.
What made that moment possible?
(08:28):
Was it your consistency inchecking in with them every day?
Was it your empathy?
Was it your determination tonot let them ruffle your
feathers every time they brushedyou off?
What was it?
And then next?
What was it?
And then next?
What ripple effect could thathave?
Maybe that moment of trust willhelp them open up to others in
(08:50):
the future.
Who knows, right?
But by expanding your gratitude, you're not just acknowledging
a single moment, you're lookinginto its deeper meaning and
impact.
Yo, this is important.
This is the missing link ofthis gratitude conversation that
(09:11):
no one talks about.
So take a moment, think aboutone small win that you've had
sometime this semester.
Was it a breakthrough with astudent, a resolved conflict
(09:33):
with a parent, or maybe somesort of teeny, tiny, incremental
change in behavior for astudent?
And then ask yourself what doesthis say about your strengths
as a school counselor?
Because it's okay to patyourself on the back, we need it
every now and again.
And then further, how mightthat moment ripple into the
future?
So you see, these reflectionsaren't just about making
(09:58):
ourselves feel good, and they'renot just about archiving one
single good moment in time.
They're about remindingyourself why your work matters,
especially when the big picturefeels so stinking, overwhelming.
That's why we're talking aboutit at this time of year, when we
(10:20):
have all the transcripts thatneed to be reviewed, when we
have the end of semester grades,all of the big tests.
Students are stressed, we havespecial events, so our schedules
are all off kilter.
It's harder to find kids forcounseling.
We're going to need somethingto really ground us and remind
us of our purpose and why we dowhat we do.
(10:43):
So here's my challenge to youCommit to a daily gratitude
practice.
It does not need to be fancy,it doesn't need to be a journal.
It could be a sticky note, itcould be a voice memo in your
phone that's what I use or asection in your planner.
(11:03):
If you have our School forSchool Counselors planner, you
know there's a spot at thebottom of each day to record
information, just like this.
But when you write it down orrecord it, however you choose to
honor that moment, don't justlist it.
Expand it, add the why of it,add the what, if and as you're
(11:30):
starting this gratitude practice, if you're feeling overwhelmed
and you're like Steph, there isno way that I'm going to be able
to add one more thing to my day.
Are you joking right now?
Remember that you can startsmall.
Your gratitude might be.
I showed up today.
I showed up and I did the work.
(11:50):
I listened to a podcast so Icould learn and grow as a
professional.
Those are victories too.
So if you're in that horribleplace where not only are you
feeling overwhelmed, but you'refeeling beaten down, you're
feeling demoralized, perhapsyou're starting to think about
if this is burnout or not.
(12:11):
Start small, find those momentsto be grateful for, look for
the whys and the what couldhappens because of it, and don't
forget to pat yourself on theback, because when the semester
ends, I want you to feel proud,and I don't want you to just
(12:32):
feel proud of these bigaccomplishments.
I want you to be proud of theseeds you've been planting all
along the way.
When you feel like you're justtreading water, the small quiet
moments sometimes combinetogether to create the biggest
(12:53):
waves.
You are amazing for showing upevery day waves.
You are amazing for showing upevery day, for continuing to
raise your hand and saying giveme the worst you got, I'll take
that.
Let me take that on day afterday.
Let me get beaten downsometimes beaten up right.
(13:13):
Let me take on the people whodon't want to talk to me for
whatever reason.
Let me continue to show up forthem.
Let me continue giving empathy.
Let me continue devising waysto help everyone around me grow
and become better citizens.
Let me do that job.
Is it hard?
Yes, is it lonely?
Absolutely it is, and you keepshowing up every day to do that
(13:38):
work.
Do you know how incredible thatmakes you?
Ah, it's just phenomenal, and Iam so honored and humbled that
you spent this time with me inthis podcast episode.
Hey, if this episode resonatedwith you, please share it with a
fellow counselor.
Let's spread support, let'sspread validation and
(14:01):
empowerment, because y'all, weare all in this school
counseling thing together.
I'll be back soon with anotherepisode of the School for School
Counselors podcast.
In the meantime, I hope youhave the best week, take care of
yourself during this sprint tothe end of the semester, and
I'll be back with you soon.
(14:21):
You got this.