June 20, 2025 • 51 mins
Let us know what you think! Text us!
In this powerful and heartfelt episode of Security Halt!, host Deny Caballero sits down with Lexie Lazzaro to share the inspiring legacy of her brother, Green Beret Tommy Lazzaro — a warrior, mentor, and leader who left an indelible impact on everyone he touched. Lexie opens up about their childhood, the role of family in building resilience, and how Tommy’s passion for mentorship and sports leadership became the foundation for a life-changing nonprofit in his honor.
Together, they explore the deep connections between military service, youth development, and the enduring value of giving back. From stories of sacrifice and growth to the launch of a foundation that empowers underprivileged youth through sports, this conversation is a celebration of legacy, leadership, and the power of community.
🎯 Whether you're a veteran, athlete, mentor, or someone seeking purpose — this episode is a must-listen.
👉 Don’t forget to follow, like, share, and subscribe on Spotify, YouTube, and Apple Podcasts to support the mission of veteran mental health and mentorship.
BE A BRO! Support the show!!
buymeacoffee.com/sechaltpodcast
https://buymeacoffee.com/sechaltpodcast
Looking for hand crafted, custom work, military memorabilia or need something laser engraved? Connect with my good friend Eric Gilgenast.
Instagram: haus_gilgenast_woodworks_main
https://www.instagram.com/haus_gilgenast_woodworks_main/
Chapters
00:00 Introduction and Legacy of Tommy
03:01 Growing Up in Colorado Springs
05:48 The Importance of Mentorship in Sports
08:41 Leadership and Team Dynamics
11:30 College Journey and Athletic Aspirations
14:27 Lexie's Path and Career Choices
17:08 The Value of Following Your Own Path
20:01 Sibling Support and Relationship Dynamics
22:34 Navigating Life After Sports
26:20 The Call to Serve: Joining the Army
29:19 The Journey Through Basic Training
31:19 Graduation Day: A Proud Moment
36:12 Coping with Loss and Legacy
41:22 The Tommy Lozaro Foundation: Making a Difference
Instagram: @securityhalt
Tik Tok: @security.halt.pod
LinkedIn: Deny Caballero
Follow Lexie on Social media and grab a copy of his book today!
Instagram: tommylazzarofnd
Website: tommylazzarofoundation.org
Join us for the 1st Annual Lazzaro Legacy Classic Golf Tournament — a day of community, competition, and impact. Every dollar raised helps fund skills training, mentorship, and athletic opportunities for underprivileged high school athletes striving to reach the next level.
Saturday, June 28th, 1:30 PM – 9:00 PM EDT
https://givebutter.com/c/5b3sQE
Produced by Security Halt Media
Mark as Played
Transcript
Episode Transcript
Available transcripts are automatically generated. Complete accuracy is not guaranteed.
Speaker 1 (00:00):
Security Odd Podcast.
Let's go the only podcastthat's purpose-built from the
ground up to support you Notjust you, but the wider audience
, everybody.
Authentic, impactful andinsightful conversations that
serve a purpose to help you.
And the quality has gone up.
It's decent and it's hosted byme, danny Caballero, lexi Lazaro
(00:27):
welcome to Security Out Podcast.
How are you?
Speaker 2 (00:29):
I'm doing great.
Thank you for having me today.
I'm excited.
Speaker 1 (00:32):
Absolutely.
Thank you for coming back on.
We had a minor audio issue thefirst time, but it'll buff out.
Now we have the perfect headsetfor this.
Speaker 2 (00:40):
Yeah, it's got the gaming headset from my brother.
It was just meant to be.
Speaker 1 (00:43):
Yeah, I just got the gaming headset from my brother.
It was just meant to be.
Yeah man, tommy was aremarkable human being,
remarkable Green Beret athlete,and he touched so many lives.
And I think it's amazing thatyour newfound focus and project
is starting a nonprofit thatwill help give underserved,
underprivileged youth the chanceto become great like Tommy in
(01:06):
the football field.
Because, as we all know, yes,it's dangerous, contact and
impact sports are dangerous, butthere isn't.
We've lost the otherinstitutions that were so
paramount into developing youngmen into leaders.
I mean, we grew up with scouts,we did.
That's not around as much.
We still have sports and theyare still a viable way for young
(01:29):
men to make it out.
Some of the dangerous, mostunfortunate situations.
And looking at Tommy's legacy,looking at where it all started,
it was very much shaped byfootball.
But before we get started inTommy's journey, I want to know
more about you and your family,how you guys grew up.
Talk about that dynamic.
Speaker 2 (01:48):
Yeah, so we grew up in a small town in Colorado
Springs we're about two yearsapart, so growing up was very
fun.
It was being two years apartwhere you have a lot of
similarities.
We've got a lot of similarinterests.
You know, um, we grew up likeout in the forest, so growing up
was a lot of like my dad was,you know, doing his work calls
(02:10):
and he's like go outside, getoutside, go play.
You know.
So we'd get on our bicycles andlike go play with like the
neighborhood kids and you knowmy dad was all about like you're
not doing tv, like play withthe dog, be outside, like you
are not going to be lazy kids.
You know, um, coming my dadcoming from like military
background, he's just like.
Not about being lazy, you know,if we're watching too much tv,
(02:31):
he's like get your ass outside,go do something he was a ranger
right yeah he was.
They'd lock us out of the house.
They'd be like, oh, you can't,you can come back when the sun
goes down, you know, yeah, youcan't get away with that these
days yeah it sounds like thatwas like an early, like catalyst
for for getting involved insports, and were you as well an
(02:53):
athlete growing up?
yeah, yeah, we both were, youknow, always, always in sports.
I mean, he was hockey, lacrosse, football um his whole life and
then I did volleyball,gymnastics, cheerleading um a
little bit of soccer.
That lasted all of two minutes,but you know, I like, I like
(03:13):
cheering on the side more than Iliked being being down in front
.
Yeah yeah yeah, so we both, wewere both heavy in sports, um,
you know, it's kind of in highwe went to two different high
schools, cause he went to a highschool that would feed him into
a better, um, football systemand I was just, I was just there
to go to school, you know.
So an academic focus.
(03:36):
Yeah not quite, but I was justtrying to get through Was he
more of like the, theschoolastic and athlete, and you
were just kind of like I'mgonna party um a little bit but
the funny thing is he like hedid not study, he's just the
smartest kid in the room and itwas like I would get so mad
because like I would study myass off, I had tutors, like I
(03:56):
was like struggling especiallythrough like math and science,
and then like kid would barely,like he would go take naps in
the principal's office, likeduring no way yes, he was that
guy, like he was the class clownand then somehow made it to be
like the principal's favorite.
It would drive me nuts because Iwas like how are you, how are
you getting by doing this?
Like, how are you like acingevery class?
(04:17):
You don't even show up, you'resleeping in the principal's
office and like you don't evenstudy.
And then I'm over here likeworking my ass off and I was
like you know what?
I'm a c student, it's fine,we're okay with it.
And yeah, he crushed it inschool and didn't even try.
I was always so jealous of that.
Uh, he's just a smart kid, likeso smart, yeah, um, but yeah,
so he was.
He was good at school and goodat the sports.
Speaker 1 (04:39):
I was just good at sports yeah, one of the things
that's very interesting is, whenwe were talking earlier, the
ability to give him the propermentorship.
As we all know, the dream ofbeing an elite athlete is not
easy.
You can have a dream, but yougot to put purpose, you got to
(05:00):
put actionable steps.
And one thing that Tommy didhave is he did have mentors.
He did have people that werebrought into his life and
watching, you know, reflectingback on that, like how big was
that for him?
And watching him like be ableto have access and obviously
like was that?
Like looking back, is that thecatalyst that gave you the idea
of like, wow, okay, like he hadaccess to the right mentorship,
(05:22):
the right coaches, like kind ofeverybody gets that?
Speaker 2 (05:25):
Yeah, absolutely.
I remember like God we startedhim so young and like football
training and whatnot, like theywere in.
What is that little league?
Like the God?
Speaker 1 (05:34):
I can't remember the Pop Warner.
Speaker 2 (05:36):
Pop Warner, yes, yeah .
So he was in Pop Warner and,like my dad would like run
training camps in our front yardwith like all of his teammates
and I was always like, oh, I cantry, like I'm gonna go run with
the boys and, like you know, Iwas trying to like keep up with
them but, like we, I rememberhim being in like little little
league and we were putting himthrough trainings and, like my
dad was, you know, my dad wasrunning them at the time and
(05:57):
then when he got into highschool and was like dad, I'm
serious about this, like I wantto go nfl, I want to like I want
to make it big, my dad was likeall right.
So you know, we started gettinghim into like strength and
conditioning coaching.
Then we got him mentors.
Cedric Bonner was like a hugeinfluence in my brother's life,
probably one of his favoritepeople to this day, you know.
(06:18):
He just he just drilled it intomy brother how important it is
to like be a leader on thefootball team, like he was.
Like it's more important to be aleader than be the best guy
like physically the best guy outthere and I think that just
flipped something in his brainand it just like kind of geared
him in this direction of likeyeah, I can be number one, but I
(06:38):
could also like lead the team,and I think he just he saw
leadership as like a moreimportant skill and then he
turned that skill into alsobeing like the best one on the
field.
Speaker 1 (06:48):
No, you know what age did you see that?
That that flip switch Causeeverybody a young man, and I
think that's like the, theultimate, like you know, failure
.
Every young man experiences atsome point, maybe a lot of them,
you know.
Maybe don't grow up and figurethat out, but we tend to to
(07:10):
think that we have to be theabsolute best at everything, we
have to out out, you know,perform and do better than
everybody in the world, and thenwe don't realize that
leadership and that factor is,like, really important, like a
lot of us don't realize it.
Some of us stumble upon it inthe q course, trying to become a
green beret, and theyunderstand the importance of
like, okay, I, I don't have tobe the guy that is amazing at
everything, but I need to be theleader that can bring out the
best in everybody.
When did you see that flip inhis mentality growing up?
Speaker 2 (07:33):
I think for my dad might have like a different
perspective, like being from,you know, father figure, but I
think, like for me as a sister,I kind of saw it like in his
later years in high school.
Um, the older he was getting,the more mature he was getting,
obviously, and um, I think itwould be like his junior senior
year when, like it got like itgot really important, you know
they were, they were on theirway to state championship and he
(07:54):
was like, if we're going tomake it all the way, like it's
on my back.
You know, he was thequarterback from, like little
league, like he was always thequarterback and like not being
quarterback was not an option.
So like he had to leave theteam.
He had to put the team I wasback, you know, and he had to
like inspire his entire team topush all the way.
You know, um, you know, funnylittle bet with my dad and if he
(08:17):
made it to, if he won the statechampionship, you know, and so
that helped him along the way,you know, but at the same time,
like it was, it was thesatisfaction of getting his team
where they wanted to go, youknow, and that was winning state
championship gosh, that's a lotof people don't don't believe
it.
Speaker 1 (08:35):
There there are a lot of parallels to the serving, to
being a leader in the militaryand a lot of the experiences we
have as kids uh, playing sports.
There really is like, whetheryou want to admit or not, like
learning how to coalesce arounda leader, like it's important,
the one guy that everybodyunderstands, like, ah, this is
the guy, this is our teamsergeant.
I think that happens, like notin every team.
(08:57):
Sometimes you have leaders thatnobody wants to rally around.
You follow orders, but when youhave a true leader, you follow
them.
Yeah, you understand.
Like, no matter what comes downthe line, no matter what happens
, I'm sticking and I'm followingthrough and that's an important
trait to have.
And, sadly, as much as we thinkthat it could be coached and
developed in everybody, a bigpercentage of that comes down.
(09:19):
I don't know, you're born withit.
I've been with so many people,I've met so many guys and worked
and, and and been a part ofsome amazing teams, and then you
get a leader that doesn't knowwhat it means to be a true
leader, doesn't know how tocoalesce the team around,
doesn't know how to give or howto, you know be inspiring and
it's just like man, like we'llfollow your orders, but you
(09:41):
fucking suck yeah, yeah.
Speaker 2 (09:44):
No, thomas was like he was so good at like getting
everyone to be so inspired bylike his drive and like he's
like.
I don't even I don't know, youknow, I don't know what they
said down there, but like I justremember like they just got so
hyped when thomas was likegetting them ready for a game.
You know it was um, it was socool to see and they just they
(10:06):
adored him, they loved him andhe but he was so good at, like
me, being intentional with eachperson that was on his team.
You know and I think that alsocomes with leadership you know,
like you're not just another guyon the team, like you're a
brother, and like he wasinvested in every aspect of
their life.
You know he knew, you knowevery single one of their like,
what their siblings are up to,what their family members were
(10:27):
doing, where they're from.
You know, like he went out ofhis way to really really get to
know you as a person, and Ithink that has so much to do
with like, why people just fellso in love with him and just
like followed everything that hedid.
Speaker 1 (10:41):
Yeah, and going into that high school.
You, you know, senior year inhigh school, understanding like,
okay, like I, I have to play,not only for myself.
I think a lot of young athleteshave that, that fear that if,
especially a quarterback, likeif I don't play at my absolute
best, somebody's not going toget the ability to shine,
somebody's not going to be getthe ability to get looks like,
(11:03):
how did that pressurematerialize into, like, getting
those offers to go to collegeand how did he handle that?
That's something that a lot ofus don't, don't have an insight
to like.
For a vast majority of us, like, there's only very few, uh, you
know, great athletes to makemake it into, like becoming a
green beret, uh, it's just oneof those things it's like.
It's it's important to exploreand understand, especially for
(11:24):
his story.
Speaker 2 (11:25):
Yeah, I think he just really put his head down and he
was so serious about it so hetook all of his training
seriously.
He took all of his campseriously.
It was football before anything, it was strength training
before anything.
It was practicing in the frontyard, doing his footwork, um,
everything that he needed to doto become like the best leader
(11:48):
and the best football player onthe team.
That became like the mostimportant thing for him.
You know, going into that year,um, it was kind of crunch time
like, and I would say, like he,he had big dreams.
You know he wanted D one, likehe wanted to be picked up by a
huge school, um, and as he'sgoing through you know the year
and there he wasn't getting likeas many like interests as he
(12:10):
was hoping to get.
You know it was just making himwork harder and harder.
You know he was not he's notthe kid to take no for an answer
he was the kid to say all right, fuck it, let's go harder.
Yeah, ultimately he ended upgoing to uh, michigan right um,
he went to dodge city for asemester, um, so he got picked
(12:31):
up by I think it's a d3 schooldodge city.
Um, so he got picked up there.
He played one semester withthem and then michigan central
michigan picked him up yeah anduh.
Speaker 1 (12:41):
What was it like watching him go through that
process and at any point like itseems like you were polar
opposites of student athlete andthen just I hate school.
Speaker 2 (12:53):
I just want to get through this at any point
watching him and reflecting onhis journey, where you're like
fuck, like, I need to be morelike my brother, I need a
hundred percent a thousandpercent, like I like the
jealousy factor of like god,he's just crushing life, like
he's doing so good at life, andI was like I'm just living at
Scottsdale, like doing a thing.
(13:16):
You know, um, he, he was God, hewas just so smart and so, like
school again.
He got into college and schoolagain was just so easy for him.
He was like I'm going to, I'mgoing to go work out, and I was
like like don't you have classright now?
He's like yeah, yeah, but Igotta go work out, like I gotta,
I gotta do this.
And then he's like I used mytest, like I'm fine, like I'm
getting good grades.
You know, um, he was so good atthat and you know he, like,
(13:40):
when he went into at cmu, he wasso serious about his school.
He was really serious about,you know, getting his bachelor
and um, at one point looked atgetting into his master's and
then he was like ah, you know,like bachelor's is good enough,
you know he was, he was solidwith it.
He was like I don't, I don'treally need to do any more
school, um, but yeah, I knowwatching him develop as like a
(14:02):
man going through college waslike so cool.
And then you know, I'm livingin scottsdale and I got to, I
got to watch his games like fromlike the local bar that we
would go to, they'd put hisgames up on TV.
Speaker 1 (14:13):
Yeah.
Speaker 2 (14:14):
So it's like I'm like watching my brother play
football on TV, like it was thecoolest thing.
And then, you know, I get totalk to him after and he was
like that was just the fuckingcoolest thing ever.
Like that there too.
Yeah, and your path, where didyou go for school?
I didn't.
You know.
(14:34):
I moved out to Texas for abouta year and a half, took some
community college classes, justkind of trying to figure out
what I wanted to do.
I always wanted to go intofashion, but I didn't want to go
to like New York or LA.
So I was kind of like I don'tknow what I want to do.
And then I just always I'vealways been more of a worker.
You know I wanted to get intobusiness one way or another.
So I just kind of was like Idon't want to blow money on
(14:55):
school.
That's not really going to doanything for me.
I'd rather like go work forsomeone who knows what they're
doing and just learn straightfrom them.
So about a year and a halfafter, like taking some courses
in community college, I was likeI just like this is, it's a
waste for me.
Complete opposite in communitycollege.
I was like I just like this isit's a waste for me complete
(15:15):
opposite.
Yeah, so you can imagine myfamily's over here like do you
want math, lee?
You know he's doing greenschool.
I'm over here, quitting school,moving to scottsdale guys.
Speaker 1 (15:24):
This is great.
I'm happy for him.
Speaker 2 (15:26):
He's crushing life he , really he was scottsdale's
pretty fun.
Speaker 1 (15:34):
He's crushing life.
He really he was pretty fun.
Yes, I gotta pause and focus onon your journey for a little
bit.
Why scottsdale?
I've been there.
It's, it's a.
It's a hell of a party town,but man, I would imagine it's
pretty.
Uh, it can be daunting forsomebody young like that's,
that's like a, that's a man,that's a, that's a fiery pit,
you know when I found Scottsdalenine years ago, it wasn't what
it is today.
Speaker 2 (15:57):
It has turned into a big party place.
But you know, when I foundScottsdale it was just this
beautiful city full of like,life and adventure and it was
something new.
I'm like I've got a little bitof gypsy soul.
I'm like I just can't stay inone place for too long and I had
gone down there with a friendand she was like oh, you know,
we've got a house we need tocheck on with the family.
(16:18):
You should drive down.
I spent 48 hours there.
I was like I love this place.
Went back to Denver.
I was like quit in july, likeI'm moving to scottsdale, and my
boss is like, are you insane?
I was like, probably, but Idon't know.
So I, you know I moved downthere with, like, my best friend
from high school.
We got a three bedroom, asked,uh, put some ads on craigslist
(16:40):
to like fill the third bedroom,found my other best friend
through craigslist and then, uh,yeah, just kind of found a job
out there and just like washaving the greatest time and
what'd you get into?
uh, oh gosh.
I got into so many randomthings before I really like got
back into fashion.
Um, I was working at nordstromfor a little bit and then I
(17:01):
started working for a ppocompany.
Hated that, not that kind ofgirl and then I started working
for etna selling medicalinsurance, for a while also did
that um and you know fitness hasbeen a huge Um, and then you
know fitness has been a hugepart of my life.
Growing up, you know,especially like coming from
military family.
My dad's like you know, sports,military, like it's just,
fitness has just always been inthere.
(17:21):
So I ended up working for mypersonal trainer, um, worked for
him for about three and a halfyears, and then I have found
myself in Dallas now.
Speaker 1 (17:31):
Nice.
And what are you doing inDallas, right?
Speaker 2 (17:33):
now.
Right now I am working like thewholesale side of retail for a
women's apparel company.
So just kind of starting to getinto that.
So staying in the fashion world, staying on like on the
wholesale side of it, nowlearning that that side of the
business, which is reallyexciting for me.
Speaker 1 (17:49):
So oh yeah, that's awesome we don't talk enough
about like.
I obviously waited till I wasdone in the military to go to
school and I'm so proud of that.
Very happy that I found myeducation later on in life
because, you know, for all of myundergrad I had already read a
(18:09):
vast majority of coursework.
You know, while I was on my wayout of the military I was
excited about learning thisstuff.
I was trying to diagnose andfigure shit out what I was going
through.
Speaker 2 (18:18):
Yeah.
Speaker 1 (18:19):
Which is like you don't have that passion, you
don't have that drive.
For a lot of us, when you'reyoung dude, and when you figure
out what you're, when you'reable to explore what you're
actually excited about like justwhat you talked about, just I
literally just listening to youdescribe your life is nothing
but like somebody followingtheir heart, following their,
their, their, their intuition,and figuring things out and in
(18:41):
such a passionate way of like,okay, fuck it.
Like I.
I know this is this normal wayof life is not for me.
I'm willing to just fucking goto scottsdale and look for, look
for a roommate on craigslistand hope they don't fucking kill
me my mom was like are youinsane?
Speaker 2 (19:00):
I was like probably I don't know.
Speaker 1 (19:02):
Meanwhile, tommy's living it up crushing school,
playing football and you'rehaving you're truly having a
green beret approach to you.
Speaker 2 (19:10):
Like man, I may not speak the language, but I'm just
gonna get out here and justenjoy it yeah, you know, for me,
like I think there's too muchemphasis on like putting 18 year
olds into in charge of theirlife, like so early, you know.
Like they're like you know youturn 18 and it's like go figure
out what you want to do for therest of your life and spend a
hundred thousand dollars tryingto figure it out.
(19:31):
And I just was like I just Idon't know what I want to do.
Like you know, my brotheralways knew like he was always
gonna try and go nfl, he wasalways gonna play football, you
know.
And then like when he's goingthrough that, like he just knew
what he was doing yeah you know,and I had no idea.
I was like I I don't know, Ilike weddings and I like events
and I like fashion and I likethis girly shit and I just like
(19:56):
don't, I don't know what I wantto do with my life, you know.
And so spending a hundredthousand dollars trying to
figure it out just made no senseto me.
So I was like, let me just getin the industry, figure out if I
like it, if I don't jump to thenext one, you know, and that's
kind of like how I've done itand I've been successful.
You know, I've had, I've madesome really great connections, I
have learned so much from somany people and I just I think
(20:18):
that's like a path that morepeople should be taking.
Speaker 1 (20:21):
Absolutely.
Be willing to bet on yourself,be willing to push away from the
shore and the safety of youknow the common path Like, if
you, if you just dream for onesecond, if you're listening and
you're younger and you're,you're stuck in that dead end
job like push away, be willingto bet on yourself.
Not a lot of people are willingto go into discomfort to give
(20:42):
themselves ability to figure outwhat they want to do.
Yes, you'll, you'll have to,you know, not go out and eat
every single night.
Maybe you'll have to move intoa more, you know, fiscally
responsible apartment for awhile.
Speaker 2 (20:54):
But working for jobs with four roommates at one point
, like there was four of usliving in my three bedroom
apartment at one point, withfour dogs and four girls, and
I'm working four jobs and I'm,like you know, losing my mind.
But I was like this is how Imake it, like this is how I,
this is how I get what I want.
You know losing my mind, but Iwas like this is how I make it
like this is how I.
Speaker 1 (21:13):
This is how I get what I want.
You know, I fucking get that.
I I completely.
Oh my god.
Yeah, that's that's life.
More people need to talk aboutthat.
And um, what was the?
You know, a lot of people the,the.
The dynamic between brothersand sisters is difficult.
Right?
You either like, either.
Like.
I'm fortunate I'm still prettyclose to my older sister, but,
(21:34):
uh, we never had that dynamic oflike.
Well, you should be doing this.
This is the right path to do.
Did you ever feel?
Was that ever like?
Did Tommy ever did?
Did he give you grace forfollowing your own path, or was
it always it was, or is itdifferent where it's like man,
you should be doing this.
Speaker 2 (21:49):
No, oh my God, he supported everything that I did
Hell yeah.
He was literally my biggestsupporter when we were younger.
We're two years apart.
We're going to differentschools.
When he's on the football fieldFriday nights, so am I cheering
on the sidelines at differentschools.
We spent a lot of time apart,um, when we were, you know, in
(22:13):
that like teenage range, um, andthen when I left, he was kind
of like where'd you go?
Like you're gone now, you know,and we got so much closer after
I was gone, um, and like when Imoved to arizona he living in
Michigan, absolutely Likebeautiful state, love it in the
(22:34):
summertime, but like in thewintertime, like it is freaking
cold there and you know.
So he was jumping down toScottsdale every chance he got.
And so Scottsdale will alwayshave like so much of my heart,
because that is where he and Ijust became like this.
Like he, we were best friends,you know, like we were
inseparable.
We, our relationship grew tolike this brother, sister
(22:57):
relationship that I you don'tsee a lot of people, a lot of
siblings have.
You know we're, we speak thesame language, like we're
literally the exact same personin different bodies.
Just, we're just like, like Isaid, like he is a party boy,
I'm a party girl, like we, justwe love to have fun, but like
when it's time to like get towork, like we both put our head
(23:17):
down and like we get our shitdone and like we both want to be
number one, you know.
So, like anything I did, I waslike, hey, I'm quitting school.
He was like what are you gonnado?
And I was like I don't know.
He's like we'll fucking figureit out and then go quit school
and I'm like all right deal.
So I did that, you know.
And then, you know, when I waslike I'm gonna quit my corporate
job and like go work for this,you know, personal trainer dude,
(23:39):
and like see how that goes, hewas like fucking do it, like
that's awesome.
He was like just make sureyou're doing okay.
You, as long as he was like areyou mentally okay?
Always, I was like alwayseverything.
Like you're mentally good, thengo do it, you know.
Speaker 1 (23:52):
Oh yeah.
That's the type of support weneed.
Yeah, exactly.
Speaker 2 (23:56):
He was like mom and dad, don't support what we're
doing.
He was like go do it do itanyways.
Speaker 1 (24:12):
Do it in spite of them.
They don't like it.
You should really do it now.
Yeah, dude, we all need thatsort of like backing and
cheering on from the people welove and care uh care about when
his time was coming to an endin sports, like how did he
handle it and how do like?
What was that conversation like?
Speaker 2 (24:20):
it was tough.
Um, he, I think he reallystruggled with it.
I think he was.
He was getting to a point withfootball where he was realizing
that like the NFL wasn't goingto be picking him up, um, and he
would have to go.
You know, just go and try out.
And you know, I think, after somany years of trying and trying
(24:41):
and trying, and you know he had, he had a lot of failures in
football, like, I'll be real,like he wasn't, like he wasn't
number one all the time, you,but he was always the leader,
like I said, um, and I think hejust kind of got to a point
where he was like you know, Ithink I think I did my run with
football and I think it's timeto like go out into the real
world, see what the real world'sabout.
(25:01):
And he got there.
Speaker 1 (25:02):
He was like this is not for me and what did you get
into out of once he got out of?
Uh, you know college andplaying he.
Speaker 2 (25:09):
He was doing recruiting, sales or something,
sitting at a desk on a computerall day long reporting numbers
to someone.
There was zero excitement,there was zero drive, there was
no team.
He's a sales guy doing his ownthing.
(25:30):
He had moved back to Denverliving with his best friend, who
we grew up with.
He's not the guy to sit behinda computer and just work at a
desk all day.
(25:51):
For a while before he called meand he was like don't kill me,
but I think I'm gonna go to thearmy.
I was like I'm gonna kill you.
Like what are you talking about?
I was like what's wrong withyour job?
And he's like I'm so fuckingbored.
He's like you can't do this,like I just I missed the team.
He was like I need to do morewith my life.
He was like I'm just likewasting away, not doing anything
important, like this is astupid job.
I'm doing stupid sales.
(26:12):
Like I need to do somethingimportant.
Yeah, um.
And I was like devastated.
Obviously you know it's scarybeing on like the family side of
, like someone going into themilitary, especially knowing my
brother, who's the guy thatwants to kick all the doors in
and be the first one through,you know, and like the second,
he said that like I knew, likewe're not, we're not just doing
(26:32):
any old, any old army job.
Like I knew he was gonna be.
You know, he wanted to go tocombat, he wanted to get
deployed, he wanted to be out infront.
But that's why it was sodevastating and scary, because
it was like as, as his sister,as his best friend, I'm like the
possibility of losing you islike so real.
(26:52):
And he it was a, it was achance he was willing to take,
which was like the scariest part, but also like so proud of him
for wanting to do something sogood, like fight for our country
and like really like dosomething meaningful with his
life.
Speaker 1 (27:10):
Yeah, and I would imagine the conversation with
the parents probably was filledwith a lot of questions as to
why.
Speaker 2 (27:18):
now, locked at his computer.
Um, our biggest thing was likedo you really know what you're
getting into?
And he was like I have done somuch research.
He was like I know I don't wantto go officer, I know I want to
(27:40):
enlist.
Like I know I want to gospecial forces, I know what path
I want to take when I get thereand I know how I need to go
about it.
Um, so when he said that to mydad, my dad was like oh shit,
like you're, you're very seriousabout this.
And you know my dad was aranger, you know he was military
(28:02):
.
He served 13 years, um, beforehe got out.
And you know, I think mybrother wanted to follow in his
footsteps.
He was, I mean, his bedroomwhen he was little was like army
gi joe, whatever.
You know, like it was always inhim.
He was, I mean, his bedroomwhen he was little was like army
gi joe, whatever.
You know like it was always inhim he was always playing with
guns airsoft guns, paintballguns, you know all that stuff.
So it made sense when he saidit, but we were all like shit,
(28:22):
like you're serious about thisyeah um, so yeah, 2020 he
enlisted, and that's where hisjourney started with the green
beret yeah, did he.
Speaker 1 (28:33):
Did he have any interactions with like a, an
actual green beret, or was itall just sitting down and just
going through and doing his deepdive research on the internet?
Speaker 2 (28:42):
You know he spoke with and I don't remember who
these people were, but he spokewith multiple guys that were
officers enlisted.
I don't know specifically likewhat, what their role was, but
he spoke with.
I know he went and like satdown and had like an interview
or like a chat with like someonewho, like you, go to talk to
for the military.
(29:02):
I don't know how that works.
There's a guy I probably soundso blonde right now saying that,
but Tommy, there's a guy aroundthe corner.
Speaker 1 (29:12):
He wants to talk to you about serving he's got he's
got all the insights.
Speaker 2 (29:15):
Yeah, so you know, he , he.
I just remember him saying,like, lex, I've done my research
, like, I've talked to a lot ofguys.
He was, like, I've talked todad's friends, like, and he was,
you know, he went around my dadat first um just to like get
the opinions of people who werenot family yeah you know my
dad's got his one opinion, he'sgot his side.
You know he served 13 years,like he has so much insight.
(29:39):
But my brother just wanted likeoutside, outside, inside you
know.
So, um, I think he talked withmaybe five or six people,
including the military or thearmy, before he was like, yeah,
this is what I'm going to do.
Speaker 1 (29:50):
Yeah, yeah, I think.
Uh, you know, going throughbasic training is nothing going
all the prep because he signedup for 18 X, correct?
He went through the 18 Xpipeline, so he went straight.
He went straight in.
He didn't serve in aconventional army first right,
yeah.
Yeah.
So there's not a lot that youknow families that don't really
(30:13):
understand, like the the firstfew months, um, before you make
it to brag, it's just there'snot much excitement.
Like there's just like, okay,you go into basic training, you
go to airborne school, but likewhen you finally sign in and
you're finally going in the SWCC, like that's when you like,
that's when you, especially now,like now that I'm, I'm old as
(30:33):
shit and I'm starting to see,you know, young, young men that
I've, I've helped along the way,when they finally get to SWCC,
that's like when they like theireyes open up and they're like,
oh fuck, like this is it, I'mfinally here.
Did you see that shift and hisexcitement when he finally was
like, oh fuck, I'm about tostart this.
It's gonna be a journey.
We're about to start this thingoh my god.
Speaker 2 (30:54):
Yes, he was so excited, you know, uh, when he
enlisted, like he enlisted overcovid and it was nine months.
It was nine long ass months ofhim sitting around doing
absolutely nothing, waiting onthe army to just send them
through basic.
Like he waited so long.
(31:15):
So like he really like had tolike the drive to get there
because he was like I did notwait nine months to not get what
I wanted out of this.
You know.
So, when he finally, like yousaid, like you finally get to
that point, we're like oh my god, this is it, like we made it,
like we're doing this.
Um, he was so, so excited.
Um, I remember, like when theygo through basic, I think it's
(31:39):
basic when you can't you don'thave your phone, you can't talk
to anyone, you just writeletters.
you know we were writing lettersback and forth to each other.
You know I'd like takingpictures of like us and the
family and like my friends.
He was like really good friendswith and like sending him
photos of like stuff that wewere up to.
And every single one of hisletters was just like okay,
we're doing this, and like thisis so cool, and like this
(32:00):
happened and like I just can'tbelieve that I'm doing this
right now.
He was like this fucking sucksso bad, but it's actually like
so cool at the same time.
Speaker 1 (32:08):
Yep, that's on par yeah.
Speaker 2 (32:11):
Yeah.
So like reading his letterslike was so inspiring.
Like every time he would like Iget another one.
I just remember just likesitting there and I was like I'm
so proud of you, like you couldhave.
You could have bailed so manytimes, you had so many ways to
get out.
You could have just been likethis is too hard.
But he sat there and he waslike I'm so glad I waited, I'm
(32:31):
so glad I did this.
I'm loving life.
Like this is so cool.
He was like I'm so glad Iwaited, I'm so glad I did this.
I'm loving life.
Like this is so cool.
He was like I have never beenthrough so much shit ever.
I love it at the same time andhate it, you know.
So he was really excited, youknow.
Speaker 1 (32:45):
Yeah, what was it like finally like seeing that
graduation having him don theGreen Beret for the first time.
People don't understand whatthat graduation having them don
the Green Beret for the firsttime.
People don't understand whatthat graduation, what that
ceremony is like.
It is one of the singlegreatest graduations you will
ever experience.
Just being in the audience, letalone being on that stage.
(33:07):
That moment is so brief.
It's like you've worked over ayear of your life to get that
handshake, to get that berethanded to you.
Uh, it just it goes by so fast.
But every time you, you know,you reflect back and see those
photos.
It's like holy shit, like ittakes you right back.
What was it like seeing himfinally walk across that stage?
Speaker 2 (33:29):
oh, my god, proudest moment, proudest moment of me.
My parents like watching him.
You know they're very stoic whenthey're walking but my brother
has like, if you've, if anyone,anyone who knows my brother he's
got these big, huge I calledhim little dinosaur eyes, but
he's got these huge eyes and Icould just see it in his eyes.
He was beaming.
(33:50):
He was just wanted to come outof his skin.
He was so excited that hefinally made it.
He's so proud of what he haddone.
Um, and seeing the light in hiseyes with, like, how proud he
was of like what he accomplishedwas just.
I was like all right, it's finethat you're doing this.
You know, it gave me that, thatpeace of mind, that, like
you're, this is where you needto be.
(34:11):
You know, um, watching him walkacross that stage after the God
, what was years of listening tothe torture that he had to go
through to learn everything thathe had to learn to get to that
point.
And you know, not everyonemakes it through the course and
not everyone makes it through um, what is that?
The prisoner of war camp that?
Speaker 1 (34:33):
you guys do.
Speaker 2 (34:34):
Oh my God, you know there are.
There's a lot of guys you knowwho don't make it like it's
really really daunting on likeyour mental state.
It's really daunting on youphysically.
You know I've watched him gainand lose so much weight you know
he went from 140 to or 240pounds to 210 pounds way too
(34:56):
fast.
So the what they have to endureand then you get to that point
and you did cross that line andyou, you made it to the finish
line and you got.
You got that it's the coolestthing to watch all of those guys
.
You know there was hundreds ofthem.
Speaker 1 (35:14):
And at the end when they graduated.
Speaker 2 (35:17):
You know you come over, you talk to the family.
So many of his fellow you knowarmy guys were coming over to me
and my family.
Your son got me through.
Your son got me through.
Your son is the reason I heldon as long as I did and that was
like probably even a more proudmoment that I'm like damn you.
You were really the strengthfor like all these other guys
(35:39):
and you carried them through.
That was just the guy that mybrother was.
Speaker 1 (35:43):
That's a true leader.
People understand the dynamic,that the course is long, and
it's whether you're a Bravo, 18,echo, 18, charlie, everybody
and Delta certainly are Deltas.
Everybody faces their trialsand tribulations and more often
(36:04):
than not it can just be a small,simple interaction with another
friend or even a student thatyou're not even close with.
But they provide some sort ofmoral support, whether it's a
look, whether it's anencouraging remark like hey,
keep going.
Sometimes you get your dickknocked into dirt, you fail
something, you stumble, youdon't meet a gate and you have
to redo something, and for a lotof people they just give up.
But there's great guys outthere.
(36:25):
I had them in my class whereall you, all you needed was, you
know, for example, teddy'sBritish accent telling you to
stop being a cunt, uh.
Or or one of your friends likeJason Jolly that just told you
to man up and keep going.
Those individuals are always inthe course, they're always
there, they're always around,even for that little sense of
(37:04):
like hey, you got this, keepgoing, you're not out of this
fight of leadership.
Growing up as a kid and incollege and then was actually
just masterfully like able toimplement that in his time as a
green beret.
Um, because, like I, like Isaid before, like when we were
talking and engaging, whensomebody reaches through online
(37:29):
and is able to communicate justhow amazing somebody was and how
important this new mission thattheir family's involved in, I
don't take that lightly.
And when his friend reached out, you could tell this person
meant something to him.
It was not like, hey, I needyou to help support this
nonprofit.
No, my brother, it's not eventalked through in the sense of a
(37:53):
past sense where we've lost him.
It's talking through like he'sstill with me and we need a
champion as cause.
Losing Tommy at such an earlyyou know, early age and I mean
he just started living life, hejust became a Green Beret, he
was just starting like, reallylike flourish in his new
profession that's heartbreaking.
(38:14):
That's a tough, tough thing todeal with for everybody, to
include teammates and family.
But how are you moving forward?
How are you dealing with ittoday, Having you know this
amazing giant new focal pointbeing the foundation you started
(38:34):
for him?
How are you grappling this loss?
Speaker 2 (38:38):
Um, you know, I literally have to take it day by
day.
It's really hard.
Um, um, oh sorry when I say hewas my best friend, he, like, he
was literally my person.
You know, he's the, you knowpeople coming in, out of your
lives.
You have your parents andeveryone, but, like your, your
(38:59):
sibling is that person that,like you have until the end.
You know, and to not have himhere is so painful.
Um, so, creating thisfoundation is literally the
thing that I'm like kind ofclinging to.
You know, it's, it's keepinghis legacy alive.
Um, and he has a son.
(39:20):
On the way they found out, um,the day before he passed what,
yeah, oh my gosh and so, youknow, creating a foundation
where we are showing the worldwho my brother was and doing
that is so important to mebecause I want this little boy
(39:40):
that he is about to have, um, toknow who his dad was, and I
want this kid to grow up knowingthat like he would have had the
best father in the world, and Icling to everything that I can
to make sure that this littleboy knows who, his who, what
kind of guy his dad was, um, andyou know this foundation is
(40:02):
something that, like he wouldhave done for one of his
brothers.
You know he would have wanted tostart something to keep the
legacy alive for one of hisbrothers and he loved helping
people, he loved being like thelight in someone else's life and
if that's something that I cando with this foundation for, you
(40:23):
know, someone underprivilegedand give them the opportunities
that my brother was able to, youknow, receive from my family,
that's, those are the thingsthat I'm like clinging to right
now.
That helped me, like getthrough each day.
Speaker 1 (40:35):
Yeah, no, lexi, I, you know, exploring your journey
and and also Tommy's, like I,can't help but realize just how
in in just perfect.
You know life unfolds.
You didn't take a standardapproach to life and you went
about, uh, your life after youknow, growing up as a kid and
(40:59):
instead of going to college, youstarted going into industry.
You started figuring out, youstarted making relationships,
making friendships, likeunderstanding pivotal aspects of
what it means to build abusiness, what it means to be
successful as an entrepreneur,whether you realize it or not,
like everything about yourjourney has shaped you to be
able to do this.
Reflect on that.
(41:19):
I think that you're missingthat aspect of it.
I think that God gave you aspecific path in life and
everything is coming intofruition right now the way it's
meant to be.
It's hard to see it as a giftright now.
It's hard to see the beauty inthis, but I am telling you after
hearing the way you approachedlife after high school.
(41:40):
Everything happened for areason.
You already know what it takesto put together a foundation.
It's networking, especially anonprofit where 90% of the time,
it's just meeting people,getting support, getting back
and getting financial supportand throwing events like raising
money and the other aspect.
It's intimately tied to whatmade Tommy arguably the best
(42:03):
version of himself, which wasmentorship, coaching, giving
opportunities and being able toprovide this world with more men
like Tommy.
Being able to give that tocommunities, that's a gift that
never dies, but yeah, it's.
I think, looking looking atyour journey, looking at Tommy's
journey, it's nothing'sguaranteed in life and that's
(42:26):
that's one thing that it's hardfor us to understand when we
deal with loss Like we can't.
We can't bring Tommy back.
We can't ask God to just pressrewind, but what we can do is
understand that everythinghappens for a reason and be
grateful for the gift that wehave for his legacy, because now
(42:47):
he has a boy on the way.
Speaker 2 (42:49):
Yeah.
Speaker 1 (42:49):
And that little guy is going to grow up with so many
stories of how amazing hisfather was and the impact that
he had, because, let me tell you, there's nothing greater than a
Red Empire family had, because,let me tell you, there's
nothing greater than a RedEmpire family and his teammates,
his friends, everybody that wastouched by him, is going to be
able to meet this young man whenhe gets of age and tell him
(43:10):
amazing stories of howremarkable his father was,
especially with this foundation.
Yeah absolutely so, as we wrapit up, tell us about this
foundation.
What's coming up?
We got a golf tournament comingup here pretty soon that I'm
stoked about.
We just started running the adson all of our podcasts, so
please tell us about theupcoming golf tournament.
Speaker 2 (43:30):
So the golf tournament will be June 28th, so
two weekends from now up inWyoming, michigan.
You know we chose to do thefirst fundraising event up in
Michigan, michigan.
You know we chose to do thefirst fundraising um event up in
Michigan just because you knowthat's where, that's where his
football career like really tookoff.
Um, his, he's got a hugecommunity up in Michigan and it
(43:51):
just kind of felt like theperfect place to have our first
um foundation like event,fundraising event.
Um.
So, like I said, it'll be up inWyoming Michigan, at the Pines
golf course.
Um, kickoff is going to be two,30.
So we'll be doing, you know,like cocktails, drinks and stuff
before.
It's going to be a party Likeit's going to be so much fun.
(44:12):
You know my brother is, like Isaid, he was a party boy.
He loved, he did, did not, hedid not let a beer get left
behind, you know.
So this, uh, this will be avery fun, fun um, I think it's a
foursome like a scramble, uh,but yeah, it's gonna be a very
fun event.
We're super excited.
(44:32):
There's gonna be raffle prizes,um, a couple different ways you
can get involved.
You can do, you know,sponsorship dinner, sponsorships
, if you want to, you know, joinus.
We've got about seven spotsleft in the tournament, you know
, so still trying to get thoseseats filled for the golf
tournament.
But yeah, we're super excited.
We're trying to raise about$30,000.
(44:53):
If we can do that, we can helpabout five kids, which is like
the goal.
I don't know if we reallytouched on, like, the basis of
the foundation, but the missionfor the foundation is to target
underprivileged high schoolfootball athletes who are just
kind of in a situation wherethey're not able to get the
(45:15):
mentorship, the collegescholarship, you know eyes on
them.
They're not able to, you know,pay for the skills training, the
camps, you know all that stuff.
So my goal is to target thosekids and put them through a camp
.
Put them through, you know, getthem a mentor, find out you
know what it is they need to getto get the skill level that
(45:35):
they need to, you know, bepicked up by high, by college
scholarships.
Um so if we can raise about$30,000, we can help five kids
and that is my goal for ourfirst year as a foundation is to
help at least five kids justkind of get to a closer place of
reaching their dreams, get themout of a bad situation.
Life is tough, we're not alwaysdealt a great hand, and if I
(46:01):
can do something to helpsomebody like these kids kind of
just get into a better positionfor life, like that's, that's
our main goal.
You know, building, buildingmore of my brother, more Tommy's
.
Speaker 1 (46:15):
Yeah, absolutely.
And it's important to remember,too, that mentorship and access
to these programs like it's notjust about making great NFL
players.
Making great college footballplayers, that's great, that's
the end result.
We want a lot of them to beable to reach their dreams, but
we're helping make great men,we're helping put more Tommies
(46:35):
out to the world, and that's agift that keeps on giving,
because we can make great menwhich will ultimately go out to
their local communities, makingtheir communities better, making
their areas better, being ableto become a force multiplier,
helping mentor and coach otherkids and that's what we need.
We're starting to lose that andwe need to bring that back.
It needs to be more popular,and one of the greatest ways
(46:57):
that we can mentor and coachkids is through sports, and if
we can give access to thoseunderprivileged areas and get
them into the the proper schoolswhere they can, they can thrive
, they can reach their goals.
Like, what better mission thanthat?
So, please, I'm asking all ofyou to pause right now.
Go to episode description orjust scan this qr code right
there and you will be taken tothe website for the first annual
(47:20):
golf tournament for the TommyLazaro Foundation.
Please support them.
There's still opportunities tobecome a sponsor, so jump on
them.
It's important that we diveinto this and help support it.
Look, I know you have $100, $200to spare.
You're in the military.
I know what you make.
I know what you spend yourmoney on.
Stop subscribing to OnlyFansand start promoting and
(47:43):
supporting these nonprofits.
Damn it, you can afford it.
I've seen what you make.
Lexi, thank you so much forbeing here.
It's absolute pleasure toconnect with you.
I'm excited to see this thinggrow and get bigger.
I can't wait for you to have anevent in Florida, I mean Destin
.
It's what better fitting placeto have a golf tournament?
We've got a couple of golfcourses out there, some good
(48:04):
ones.
Speaker 2 (48:05):
Yes.
Speaker 1 (48:05):
Um, there's, there's.
No, it's not a Pinehurst, butuh, I think Destin areas is uh
growing and booming and maybe wecan beach hangout a crab Island
.
That'd be perfect.
Speaker 2 (48:17):
That would be.
That's an idea.
That's an idea right there.
Yes, We'll definitely be doingmore um throughout the year,
more fundraising events.
We'll definitely be doingsomething in Florida.
Um, so TBD on that, Heck, yeah.
Speaker 1 (48:31):
Yeah, awesome.
Thank you so much for beinghere and everybody tuning in.
Thank you guys for being hereand supporting Uh.
I appreciate you all so verymuch.
We are uh kicking ass andappreciate you all so very much.
We are kicking ass and ifyou're following us on Instagram
, you know go ahead and give usa like, share, a follow on there
too.
Really appreciate it.
Thank you for tuning in.
We'll see you all next time.
Until then, take care.
(48:53):
Thanks for tuning in and don'tforget to like, follow, share,
subscribe and review us on yourfavorite podcast platform.
If you want to support us, headon over to buymeacoffeecom
forward slash SecHawk podcastand buy us a coffee.
Connect with us on Instagram Xor TikTok and share your
thoughts or questions abouttoday's episode.
You can also visitsecurityhawkcom for exclusive
(49:13):
content, resources and updates.
And remember, we get throughthis together.
If you're still listening, theepisode's over.
Yeah, there's no more Tune intomorrow or next week.
Thank you.
Security Odd Podcast.
Let's go the only podcastthat's purpose-built from the
ground up to support you Notjust you, but the wider audience
, everybody.
Authentic, impactful andinsightful conversations that
serve a purpose to help you.
And the quality has gone up.
It's decent and it's hosted byme, danny Caballero, lexi Lazaro
(00:27):
welcome to Security Out Podcast.
How are you?
Speaker 2 (00:29):
I'm doing great.
Thank you for having me today.
I'm excited.
Speaker 1 (00:32):
Absolutely.
Thank you for coming back on.
We had a minor audio issue thefirst time, but it'll buff out.
Now we have the perfect headsetfor this.
Speaker 2 (00:40):
Yeah, it's got the gaming headset from my brother.
It was just meant to be.
Speaker 1 (00:43):
Yeah, I just got the gaming headset from my brother.
It was just meant to be.
Yeah man, tommy was aremarkable human being,
remarkable Green Beret athlete,and he touched so many lives.
And I think it's amazing thatyour newfound focus and project
is starting a nonprofit thatwill help give underserved,
underprivileged youth the chanceto become great like Tommy in
(01:06):
the football field.
Because, as we all know, yes,it's dangerous, contact and
impact sports are dangerous, butthere isn't.
We've lost the otherinstitutions that were so
paramount into developing youngmen into leaders.
I mean, we grew up with scouts,we did.
That's not around as much.
We still have sports and theyare still a viable way for young
(01:29):
men to make it out.
Some of the dangerous, mostunfortunate situations.
And looking at Tommy's legacy,looking at where it all started,
it was very much shaped byfootball.
But before we get started inTommy's journey, I want to know
more about you and your family,how you guys grew up.
Talk about that dynamic.
Speaker 2 (01:48):
Yeah, so we grew up in a small town in Colorado
Springs we're about two yearsapart, so growing up was very
fun.
It was being two years apartwhere you have a lot of
similarities.
We've got a lot of similarinterests.
You know, um, we grew up likeout in the forest, so growing up
was a lot of like my dad was,you know, doing his work calls
(02:10):
and he's like go outside, getoutside, go play.
You know.
So we'd get on our bicycles andlike go play with like the
neighborhood kids and you knowmy dad was all about like you're
not doing tv, like play withthe dog, be outside, like you
are not going to be lazy kids.
You know, um, coming my dadcoming from like military
background, he's just like.
Not about being lazy, you know,if we're watching too much tv,
(02:31):
he's like get your ass outside,go do something he was a ranger
right yeah he was.
They'd lock us out of the house.
They'd be like, oh, you can't,you can come back when the sun
goes down, you know, yeah, youcan't get away with that these
days yeah it sounds like thatwas like an early, like catalyst
for for getting involved insports, and were you as well an
(02:53):
athlete growing up?
yeah, yeah, we both were, youknow, always, always in sports.
I mean, he was hockey, lacrosse, football um his whole life and
then I did volleyball,gymnastics, cheerleading um a
little bit of soccer.
That lasted all of two minutes,but you know, I like, I like
(03:13):
cheering on the side more than Iliked being being down in front
.
Yeah yeah yeah, so we both, wewere both heavy in sports, um,
you know, it's kind of in highwe went to two different high
schools, cause he went to a highschool that would feed him into
a better, um, football systemand I was just, I was just there
to go to school, you know.
So an academic focus.
(03:36):
Yeah not quite, but I was justtrying to get through Was he
more of like the, theschoolastic and athlete, and you
were just kind of like I'mgonna party um a little bit but
the funny thing is he like hedid not study, he's just the
smartest kid in the room and itwas like I would get so mad
because like I would study myass off, I had tutors, like I
(03:56):
was like struggling especiallythrough like math and science,
and then like kid would barely,like he would go take naps in
the principal's office, likeduring no way yes, he was that
guy, like he was the class clownand then somehow made it to be
like the principal's favorite.
It would drive me nuts because Iwas like how are you, how are
you getting by doing this?
Like, how are you like acingevery class?
(04:17):
You don't even show up, you'resleeping in the principal's
office and like you don't evenstudy.
And then I'm over here likeworking my ass off and I was
like you know what?
I'm a c student, it's fine,we're okay with it.
And yeah, he crushed it inschool and didn't even try.
I was always so jealous of that.
Uh, he's just a smart kid, likeso smart, yeah, um, but yeah,
so he was.
He was good at school and goodat the sports.
Speaker 1 (04:39):
I was just good at sports yeah, one of the things
that's very interesting is, whenwe were talking earlier, the
ability to give him the propermentorship.
As we all know, the dream ofbeing an elite athlete is not
easy.
You can have a dream, but yougot to put purpose, you got to
(05:00):
put actionable steps.
And one thing that Tommy didhave is he did have mentors.
He did have people that werebrought into his life and
watching, you know, reflectingback on that, like how big was
that for him?
And watching him like be ableto have access and obviously
like was that?
Like looking back, is that thecatalyst that gave you the idea
of like, wow, okay, like he hadaccess to the right mentorship,
(05:22):
the right coaches, like kind ofeverybody gets that?
Speaker 2 (05:25):
Yeah, absolutely.
I remember like God we startedhim so young and like football
training and whatnot, like theywere in.
What is that little league?
Like the God?
Speaker 1 (05:34):
I can't remember the Pop Warner.
Speaker 2 (05:36):
Pop Warner, yes, yeah .
So he was in Pop Warner and,like my dad would like run
training camps in our front yardwith like all of his teammates
and I was always like, oh, I cantry, like I'm gonna go run with
the boys and, like you know, Iwas trying to like keep up with
them but, like we, I rememberhim being in like little little
league and we were putting himthrough trainings and, like my
dad was, you know, my dad wasrunning them at the time and
(05:57):
then when he got into highschool and was like dad, I'm
serious about this, like I wantto go nfl, I want to like I want
to make it big, my dad was likeall right.
So you know, we started gettinghim into like strength and
conditioning coaching.
Then we got him mentors.
Cedric Bonner was like a hugeinfluence in my brother's life,
probably one of his favoritepeople to this day, you know.
(06:18):
He just he just drilled it intomy brother how important it is
to like be a leader on thefootball team, like he was.
Like it's more important to be aleader than be the best guy
like physically the best guy outthere and I think that just
flipped something in his brainand it just like kind of geared
him in this direction of likeyeah, I can be number one, but I
(06:38):
could also like lead the team,and I think he just he saw
leadership as like a moreimportant skill and then he
turned that skill into alsobeing like the best one on the
field.
Speaker 1 (06:48):
No, you know what age did you see that?
That that flip switch Causeeverybody a young man, and I
think that's like the, theultimate, like you know, failure
.
Every young man experiences atsome point, maybe a lot of them,
you know.
Maybe don't grow up and figurethat out, but we tend to to
(07:10):
think that we have to be theabsolute best at everything, we
have to out out, you know,perform and do better than
everybody in the world, and thenwe don't realize that
leadership and that factor is,like, really important, like a
lot of us don't realize it.
Some of us stumble upon it inthe q course, trying to become a
green beret, and theyunderstand the importance of
like, okay, I, I don't have tobe the guy that is amazing at
everything, but I need to be theleader that can bring out the
best in everybody.
When did you see that flip inhis mentality growing up?
Speaker 2 (07:33):
I think for my dad might have like a different
perspective, like being from,you know, father figure, but I
think, like for me as a sister,I kind of saw it like in his
later years in high school.
Um, the older he was getting,the more mature he was getting,
obviously, and um, I think itwould be like his junior senior
year when, like it got like itgot really important, you know
they were, they were on theirway to state championship and he
(07:54):
was like, if we're going tomake it all the way, like it's
on my back.
You know, he was thequarterback from, like little
league, like he was always thequarterback and like not being
quarterback was not an option.
So like he had to leave theteam.
He had to put the team I wasback, you know, and he had to
like inspire his entire team topush all the way.
You know, um, you know, funnylittle bet with my dad and if he
(08:17):
made it to, if he won the statechampionship, you know, and so
that helped him along the way,you know, but at the same time,
like it was, it was thesatisfaction of getting his team
where they wanted to go, youknow, and that was winning state
championship gosh, that's a lotof people don't don't believe
it.
Speaker 1 (08:35):
There there are a lot of parallels to the serving, to
being a leader in the militaryand a lot of the experiences we
have as kids uh, playing sports.
There really is like, whetheryou want to admit or not, like
learning how to coalesce arounda leader, like it's important,
the one guy that everybodyunderstands, like, ah, this is
the guy, this is our teamsergeant.
I think that happens, like notin every team.
(08:57):
Sometimes you have leaders thatnobody wants to rally around.
You follow orders, but when youhave a true leader, you follow
them.
Yeah, you understand.
Like, no matter what comes downthe line, no matter what happens
, I'm sticking and I'm followingthrough and that's an important
trait to have.
And, sadly, as much as we thinkthat it could be coached and
developed in everybody, a bigpercentage of that comes down.
(09:19):
I don't know, you're born withit.
I've been with so many people,I've met so many guys and worked
and, and and been a part ofsome amazing teams, and then you
get a leader that doesn't knowwhat it means to be a true
leader, doesn't know how tocoalesce the team around,
doesn't know how to give or howto, you know be inspiring and
it's just like man, like we'llfollow your orders, but you
(09:41):
fucking suck yeah, yeah.
Speaker 2 (09:44):
No, thomas was like he was so good at like getting
everyone to be so inspired bylike his drive and like he's
like.
I don't even I don't know, youknow, I don't know what they
said down there, but like I justremember like they just got so
hyped when thomas was likegetting them ready for a game.
You know it was um, it was socool to see and they just they
(10:06):
adored him, they loved him andhe but he was so good at, like
me, being intentional with eachperson that was on his team.
You know and I think that alsocomes with leadership you know,
like you're not just another guyon the team, like you're a
brother, and like he wasinvested in every aspect of
their life.
You know he knew, you knowevery single one of their like,
what their siblings are up to,what their family members were
(10:27):
doing, where they're from.
You know, like he went out ofhis way to really really get to
know you as a person, and Ithink that has so much to do
with like, why people just fellso in love with him and just
like followed everything that hedid.
Speaker 1 (10:41):
Yeah, and going into that high school.
You, you know, senior year inhigh school, understanding like,
okay, like I, I have to play,not only for myself.
I think a lot of young athleteshave that, that fear that if,
especially a quarterback, likeif I don't play at my absolute
best, somebody's not going toget the ability to shine,
somebody's not going to be getthe ability to get looks like,
(11:03):
how did that pressurematerialize into, like, getting
those offers to go to collegeand how did he handle that?
That's something that a lot ofus don't, don't have an insight
to like.
For a vast majority of us, like, there's only very few, uh, you
know, great athletes to makemake it into, like becoming a
green beret, uh, it's just oneof those things it's like.
It's it's important to exploreand understand, especially for
(11:24):
his story.
Speaker 2 (11:25):
Yeah, I think he just really put his head down and he
was so serious about it so hetook all of his training
seriously.
He took all of his campseriously.
It was football before anything, it was strength training
before anything.
It was practicing in the frontyard, doing his footwork, um,
everything that he needed to doto become like the best leader
(11:48):
and the best football player onthe team.
That became like the mostimportant thing for him.
You know, going into that year,um, it was kind of crunch time
like, and I would say, like he,he had big dreams.
You know he wanted D one, likehe wanted to be picked up by a
huge school, um, and as he'sgoing through you know the year
and there he wasn't getting likeas many like interests as he
(12:10):
was hoping to get.
You know it was just making himwork harder and harder.
You know he was not he's notthe kid to take no for an answer
he was the kid to say all right, fuck it, let's go harder.
Yeah, ultimately he ended upgoing to uh, michigan right um,
he went to dodge city for asemester, um, so he got picked
(12:31):
up by I think it's a d3 schooldodge city.
Um, so he got picked up there.
He played one semester withthem and then michigan central
michigan picked him up yeah anduh.
Speaker 1 (12:41):
What was it like watching him go through that
process and at any point like itseems like you were polar
opposites of student athlete andthen just I hate school.
Speaker 2 (12:53):
I just want to get through this at any point
watching him and reflecting onhis journey, where you're like
fuck, like, I need to be morelike my brother, I need a
hundred percent a thousandpercent, like I like the
jealousy factor of like god,he's just crushing life, like
he's doing so good at life, andI was like I'm just living at
Scottsdale, like doing a thing.
(13:16):
You know, um, he, he was God, hewas just so smart and so, like
school again.
He got into college and schoolagain was just so easy for him.
He was like I'm going to, I'mgoing to go work out, and I was
like like don't you have classright now?
He's like yeah, yeah, but Igotta go work out, like I gotta,
I gotta do this.
And then he's like I used mytest, like I'm fine, like I'm
getting good grades.
You know, um, he was so good atthat and you know he, like,
(13:40):
when he went into at cmu, he wasso serious about his school.
He was really serious about,you know, getting his bachelor
and um, at one point looked atgetting into his master's and
then he was like ah, you know,like bachelor's is good enough,
you know he was, he was solidwith it.
He was like I don't, I don'treally need to do any more
school, um, but yeah, I knowwatching him develop as like a
(14:02):
man going through college waslike so cool.
And then you know, I'm livingin scottsdale and I got to, I
got to watch his games like fromlike the local bar that we
would go to, they'd put hisgames up on TV.
Speaker 1 (14:13):
Yeah.
Speaker 2 (14:14):
So it's like I'm like watching my brother play
football on TV, like it was thecoolest thing.
And then, you know, I get totalk to him after and he was
like that was just the fuckingcoolest thing ever.
Like that there too.
Yeah, and your path, where didyou go for school?
I didn't.
You know.
(14:34):
I moved out to Texas for abouta year and a half, took some
community college classes, justkind of trying to figure out
what I wanted to do.
I always wanted to go intofashion, but I didn't want to go
to like New York or LA.
So I was kind of like I don'tknow what I want to do.
And then I just always I'vealways been more of a worker.
You know I wanted to get intobusiness one way or another.
So I just kind of was like Idon't want to blow money on
(14:55):
school.
That's not really going to doanything for me.
I'd rather like go work forsomeone who knows what they're
doing and just learn straightfrom them.
So about a year and a halfafter, like taking some courses
in community college, I was likeI just like this is, it's a
waste for me.
Complete opposite in communitycollege.
I was like I just like this isit's a waste for me complete
(15:15):
opposite.
Yeah, so you can imagine myfamily's over here like do you
want math, lee?
You know he's doing greenschool.
I'm over here, quitting school,moving to scottsdale guys.
Speaker 1 (15:24):
This is great.
I'm happy for him.
Speaker 2 (15:26):
He's crushing life he , really he was scottsdale's
pretty fun.
Speaker 1 (15:34):
He's crushing life.
He really he was pretty fun.
Yes, I gotta pause and focus onon your journey for a little
bit.
Why scottsdale?
I've been there.
It's, it's a.
It's a hell of a party town,but man, I would imagine it's
pretty.
Uh, it can be daunting forsomebody young like that's,
that's like a, that's a man,that's a, that's a fiery pit,
you know when I found Scottsdalenine years ago, it wasn't what
it is today.
Speaker 2 (15:57):
It has turned into a big party place.
But you know, when I foundScottsdale it was just this
beautiful city full of like,life and adventure and it was
something new.
I'm like I've got a little bitof gypsy soul.
I'm like I just can't stay inone place for too long and I had
gone down there with a friendand she was like oh, you know,
we've got a house we need tocheck on with the family.
(16:18):
You should drive down.
I spent 48 hours there.
I was like I love this place.
Went back to Denver.
I was like quit in july, likeI'm moving to scottsdale, and my
boss is like, are you insane?
I was like, probably, but Idon't know.
So I, you know I moved downthere with, like, my best friend
from high school.
We got a three bedroom, asked,uh, put some ads on craigslist
(16:40):
to like fill the third bedroom,found my other best friend
through craigslist and then, uh,yeah, just kind of found a job
out there and just like washaving the greatest time and
what'd you get into?
uh, oh gosh.
I got into so many randomthings before I really like got
back into fashion.
Um, I was working at nordstromfor a little bit and then I
(17:01):
started working for a ppocompany.
Hated that, not that kind ofgirl and then I started working
for etna selling medicalinsurance, for a while also did
that um and you know fitness hasbeen a huge Um, and then you
know fitness has been a hugepart of my life.
Growing up, you know,especially like coming from
military family.
My dad's like you know, sports,military, like it's just,
fitness has just always been inthere.
(17:21):
So I ended up working for mypersonal trainer, um, worked for
him for about three and a halfyears, and then I have found
myself in Dallas now.
Speaker 1 (17:31):
Nice.
And what are you doing inDallas, right?
Speaker 2 (17:33):
now.
Right now I am working like thewholesale side of retail for a
women's apparel company.
So just kind of starting to getinto that.
So staying in the fashion world, staying on like on the
wholesale side of it, nowlearning that that side of the
business, which is reallyexciting for me.
Speaker 1 (17:49):
So oh yeah, that's awesome we don't talk enough
about like.
I obviously waited till I wasdone in the military to go to
school and I'm so proud of that.
Very happy that I found myeducation later on in life
because, you know, for all of myundergrad I had already read a
(18:09):
vast majority of coursework.
You know, while I was on my wayout of the military I was
excited about learning thisstuff.
I was trying to diagnose andfigure shit out what I was going
through.
Speaker 2 (18:18):
Yeah.
Speaker 1 (18:19):
Which is like you don't have that passion, you
don't have that drive.
For a lot of us, when you'reyoung dude, and when you figure
out what you're, when you'reable to explore what you're
actually excited about like justwhat you talked about, just I
literally just listening to youdescribe your life is nothing
but like somebody followingtheir heart, following their,
their, their, their intuition,and figuring things out and in
(18:41):
such a passionate way of like,okay, fuck it.
Like I.
I know this is this normal wayof life is not for me.
I'm willing to just fucking goto scottsdale and look for, look
for a roommate on craigslistand hope they don't fucking kill
me my mom was like are youinsane?
Speaker 2 (19:00):
I was like probably I don't know.
Speaker 1 (19:02):
Meanwhile, tommy's living it up crushing school,
playing football and you'rehaving you're truly having a
green beret approach to you.
Speaker 2 (19:10):
Like man, I may not speak the language, but I'm just
gonna get out here and justenjoy it yeah, you know, for me,
like I think there's too muchemphasis on like putting 18 year
olds into in charge of theirlife, like so early, you know.
Like they're like you know youturn 18 and it's like go figure
out what you want to do for therest of your life and spend a
hundred thousand dollars tryingto figure it out.
(19:31):
And I just was like I just Idon't know what I want to do.
Like you know, my brotheralways knew like he was always
gonna try and go nfl, he wasalways gonna play football, you
know.
And then like when he's goingthrough that, like he just knew
what he was doing yeah you know,and I had no idea.
I was like I I don't know, Ilike weddings and I like events
and I like fashion and I likethis girly shit and I just like
(19:56):
don't, I don't know what I wantto do with my life, you know.
And so spending a hundredthousand dollars trying to
figure it out just made no senseto me.
So I was like, let me just getin the industry, figure out if I
like it, if I don't jump to thenext one, you know, and that's
kind of like how I've done itand I've been successful.
You know, I've had, I've madesome really great connections, I
have learned so much from somany people and I just I think
(20:18):
that's like a path that morepeople should be taking.
Speaker 1 (20:21):
Absolutely.
Be willing to bet on yourself,be willing to push away from the
shore and the safety of youknow the common path Like, if
you, if you just dream for onesecond, if you're listening and
you're younger and you're,you're stuck in that dead end
job like push away, be willingto bet on yourself.
Not a lot of people are willingto go into discomfort to give
(20:42):
themselves ability to figure outwhat they want to do.
Yes, you'll, you'll have to,you know, not go out and eat
every single night.
Maybe you'll have to move intoa more, you know, fiscally
responsible apartment for awhile.
Speaker 2 (20:54):
But working for jobs with four roommates at one point
, like there was four of usliving in my three bedroom
apartment at one point, withfour dogs and four girls, and
I'm working four jobs and I'm,like you know, losing my mind.
But I was like this is how Imake it, like this is how I,
this is how I get what I want.
You know losing my mind, but Iwas like this is how I make it
like this is how I.
Speaker 1 (21:13):
This is how I get what I want.
You know, I fucking get that.
I I completely.
Oh my god.
Yeah, that's that's life.
More people need to talk aboutthat.
And um, what was the?
You know, a lot of people the,the.
The dynamic between brothersand sisters is difficult.
Right?
You either like, either.
Like.
I'm fortunate I'm still prettyclose to my older sister, but,
(21:34):
uh, we never had that dynamic oflike.
Well, you should be doing this.
This is the right path to do.
Did you ever feel?
Was that ever like?
Did Tommy ever did?
Did he give you grace forfollowing your own path, or was
it always it was, or is itdifferent where it's like man,
you should be doing this.
Speaker 2 (21:49):
No, oh my God, he supported everything that I did
Hell yeah.
He was literally my biggestsupporter when we were younger.
We're two years apart.
We're going to differentschools.
When he's on the football fieldFriday nights, so am I cheering
on the sidelines at differentschools.
We spent a lot of time apart,um, when we were, you know, in
(22:13):
that like teenage range, um, andthen when I left, he was kind
of like where'd you go?
Like you're gone now, you know,and we got so much closer after
I was gone, um, and like when Imoved to arizona he living in
Michigan, absolutely Likebeautiful state, love it in the
(22:34):
summertime, but like in thewintertime, like it is freaking
cold there and you know.
So he was jumping down toScottsdale every chance he got.
And so Scottsdale will alwayshave like so much of my heart,
because that is where he and Ijust became like this.
Like he, we were best friends,you know, like we were
inseparable.
We, our relationship grew tolike this brother, sister
(22:57):
relationship that I you don'tsee a lot of people, a lot of
siblings have.
You know we're, we speak thesame language, like we're
literally the exact same personin different bodies.
Just, we're just like, like Isaid, like he is a party boy,
I'm a party girl, like we, justwe love to have fun, but like
when it's time to like get towork, like we both put our head
(23:17):
down and like we get our shitdone and like we both want to be
number one, you know.
So, like anything I did, I waslike, hey, I'm quitting school.
He was like what are you gonnado?
And I was like I don't know.
He's like we'll fucking figureit out and then go quit school
and I'm like all right deal.
So I did that, you know.
And then, you know, when I waslike I'm gonna quit my corporate
job and like go work for this,you know, personal trainer dude,
(23:39):
and like see how that goes, hewas like fucking do it, like
that's awesome.
He was like just make sureyou're doing okay.
You, as long as he was like areyou mentally okay?
Always, I was like alwayseverything.
Like you're mentally good, thengo do it, you know.
Speaker 1 (23:52):
Oh yeah.
That's the type of support weneed.
Yeah, exactly.
Speaker 2 (23:56):
He was like mom and dad, don't support what we're
doing.
He was like go do it do itanyways.
Speaker 1 (24:12):
Do it in spite of them.
They don't like it.
You should really do it now.
Yeah, dude, we all need thatsort of like backing and
cheering on from the people welove and care uh care about when
his time was coming to an endin sports, like how did he
handle it and how do like?
What was that conversation like?
Speaker 2 (24:20):
it was tough.
Um, he, I think he reallystruggled with it.
I think he was.
He was getting to a point withfootball where he was realizing
that like the NFL wasn't goingto be picking him up, um, and he
would have to go.
You know, just go and try out.
And you know, I think, after somany years of trying and trying
(24:41):
and trying, and you know he had, he had a lot of failures in
football, like, I'll be real,like he wasn't, like he wasn't
number one all the time, you,but he was always the leader,
like I said, um, and I think hejust kind of got to a point
where he was like you know, Ithink I think I did my run with
football and I think it's timeto like go out into the real
world, see what the real world'sabout.
(25:01):
And he got there.
Speaker 1 (25:02):
He was like this is not for me and what did you get
into out of once he got out of?
Uh, you know college andplaying he.
Speaker 2 (25:09):
He was doing recruiting, sales or something,
sitting at a desk on a computerall day long reporting numbers
to someone.
There was zero excitement,there was zero drive, there was
no team.
He's a sales guy doing his ownthing.
(25:30):
He had moved back to Denverliving with his best friend, who
we grew up with.
He's not the guy to sit behinda computer and just work at a
desk all day.
(25:51):
For a while before he called meand he was like don't kill me,
but I think I'm gonna go to thearmy.
I was like I'm gonna kill you.
Like what are you talking about?
I was like what's wrong withyour job?
And he's like I'm so fuckingbored.
He's like you can't do this,like I just I missed the team.
He was like I need to do morewith my life.
He was like I'm just likewasting away, not doing anything
important, like this is astupid job.
I'm doing stupid sales.
(26:12):
Like I need to do somethingimportant.
Yeah, um.
And I was like devastated.
Obviously you know it's scarybeing on like the family side of
, like someone going into themilitary, especially knowing my
brother, who's the guy thatwants to kick all the doors in
and be the first one through,you know, and like the second,
he said that like I knew, likewe're not, we're not just doing
(26:32):
any old, any old army job.
Like I knew he was gonna be.
You know, he wanted to go tocombat, he wanted to get
deployed, he wanted to be out infront.
But that's why it was sodevastating and scary, because
it was like as, as his sister,as his best friend, I'm like the
possibility of losing you islike so real.
(26:52):
And he it was a, it was achance he was willing to take,
which was like the scariest part, but also like so proud of him
for wanting to do something sogood, like fight for our country
and like really like dosomething meaningful with his
life.
Speaker 1 (27:10):
Yeah, and I would imagine the conversation with
the parents probably was filledwith a lot of questions as to
why.
Speaker 2 (27:18):
now, locked at his computer.
Um, our biggest thing was likedo you really know what you're
getting into?
And he was like I have done somuch research.
He was like I know I don't wantto go officer, I know I want to
(27:40):
enlist.
Like I know I want to gospecial forces, I know what path
I want to take when I get thereand I know how I need to go
about it.
Um, so when he said that to mydad, my dad was like oh shit,
like you're, you're very seriousabout this.
And you know my dad was aranger, you know he was military
(28:02):
.
He served 13 years, um, beforehe got out.
And you know, I think mybrother wanted to follow in his
footsteps.
He was, I mean, his bedroomwhen he was little was like army
gi joe, whatever.
You know, like it was always inhim.
He was, I mean, his bedroomwhen he was little was like army
gi joe, whatever.
You know like it was always inhim he was always playing with
guns airsoft guns, paintballguns, you know all that stuff.
So it made sense when he saidit, but we were all like shit,
(28:22):
like you're serious about thisyeah um, so yeah, 2020 he
enlisted, and that's where hisjourney started with the green
beret yeah, did he.
Speaker 1 (28:33):
Did he have any interactions with like a, an
actual green beret, or was itall just sitting down and just
going through and doing his deepdive research on the internet?
Speaker 2 (28:42):
You know he spoke with and I don't remember who
these people were, but he spokewith multiple guys that were
officers enlisted.
I don't know specifically likewhat, what their role was, but
he spoke with.
I know he went and like satdown and had like an interview
or like a chat with like someonewho, like you, go to talk to
for the military.
(29:02):
I don't know how that works.
There's a guy I probably soundso blonde right now saying that,
but Tommy, there's a guy aroundthe corner.
Speaker 1 (29:12):
He wants to talk to you about serving he's got he's
got all the insights.
Speaker 2 (29:15):
Yeah, so you know, he , he.
I just remember him saying,like, lex, I've done my research
, like, I've talked to a lot ofguys.
He was, like, I've talked todad's friends, like, and he was,
you know, he went around my dadat first um just to like get
the opinions of people who werenot family yeah you know my
dad's got his one opinion, he'sgot his side.
You know he served 13 years,like he has so much insight.
(29:39):
But my brother just wanted likeoutside, outside, inside you
know.
So, um, I think he talked withmaybe five or six people,
including the military or thearmy, before he was like, yeah,
this is what I'm going to do.
Speaker 1 (29:50):
Yeah, yeah, I think.
Uh, you know, going throughbasic training is nothing going
all the prep because he signedup for 18 X, correct?
He went through the 18 Xpipeline, so he went straight.
He went straight in.
He didn't serve in aconventional army first right,
yeah.
Yeah.
So there's not a lot that youknow families that don't really
(30:13):
understand, like the the firstfew months, um, before you make
it to brag, it's just there'snot much excitement.
Like there's just like, okay,you go into basic training, you
go to airborne school, but likewhen you finally sign in and
you're finally going in the SWCC, like that's when you like,
that's when you, especially now,like now that I'm, I'm old as
(30:33):
shit and I'm starting to see,you know, young, young men that
I've, I've helped along the way,when they finally get to SWCC,
that's like when they like theireyes open up and they're like,
oh fuck, like this is it, I'mfinally here.
Did you see that shift and hisexcitement when he finally was
like, oh fuck, I'm about tostart this.
It's gonna be a journey.
We're about to start this thingoh my god.
Speaker 2 (30:54):
Yes, he was so excited, you know, uh, when he
enlisted, like he enlisted overcovid and it was nine months.
It was nine long ass months ofhim sitting around doing
absolutely nothing, waiting onthe army to just send them
through basic.
Like he waited so long.
(31:15):
So like he really like had tolike the drive to get there
because he was like I did notwait nine months to not get what
I wanted out of this.
You know.
So, when he finally, like yousaid, like you finally get to
that point, we're like oh my god, this is it, like we made it,
like we're doing this.
Um, he was so, so excited.
Um, I remember, like when theygo through basic, I think it's
(31:39):
basic when you can't you don'thave your phone, you can't talk
to anyone, you just writeletters.
you know we were writing lettersback and forth to each other.
You know I'd like takingpictures of like us and the
family and like my friends.
He was like really good friendswith and like sending him
photos of like stuff that wewere up to.
And every single one of hisletters was just like okay,
we're doing this, and like thisis so cool, and like this
(32:00):
happened and like I just can'tbelieve that I'm doing this
right now.
He was like this fucking sucksso bad, but it's actually like
so cool at the same time.
Speaker 1 (32:08):
Yep, that's on par yeah.
Speaker 2 (32:11):
Yeah.
So like reading his letterslike was so inspiring.
Like every time he would like Iget another one.
I just remember just likesitting there and I was like I'm
so proud of you, like you couldhave.
You could have bailed so manytimes, you had so many ways to
get out.
You could have just been likethis is too hard.
But he sat there and he waslike I'm so glad I waited, I'm
(32:31):
so glad I did this.
I'm loving life.
Like this is so cool.
He was like I'm so glad Iwaited, I'm so glad I did this.
I'm loving life.
Like this is so cool.
He was like I have never beenthrough so much shit ever.
I love it at the same time andhate it, you know.
So he was really excited, youknow.
Speaker 1 (32:45):
Yeah, what was it like finally like seeing that
graduation having him don theGreen Beret for the first time.
People don't understand whatthat graduation having them don
the Green Beret for the firsttime.
People don't understand whatthat graduation, what that
ceremony is like.
It is one of the singlegreatest graduations you will
ever experience.
Just being in the audience, letalone being on that stage.
(33:07):
That moment is so brief.
It's like you've worked over ayear of your life to get that
handshake, to get that berethanded to you.
Uh, it just it goes by so fast.
But every time you, you know,you reflect back and see those
photos.
It's like holy shit, like ittakes you right back.
What was it like seeing himfinally walk across that stage?
Speaker 2 (33:29):
oh, my god, proudest moment, proudest moment of me.
My parents like watching him.
You know they're very stoic whenthey're walking but my brother
has like, if you've, if anyone,anyone who knows my brother he's
got these big, huge I calledhim little dinosaur eyes, but
he's got these huge eyes and Icould just see it in his eyes.
He was beaming.
(33:50):
He was just wanted to come outof his skin.
He was so excited that hefinally made it.
He's so proud of what he haddone.
Um, and seeing the light in hiseyes with, like, how proud he
was of like what he accomplishedwas just.
I was like all right, it's finethat you're doing this.
You know, it gave me that, thatpeace of mind, that, like
you're, this is where you needto be.
(34:11):
You know, um, watching him walkacross that stage after the God
, what was years of listening tothe torture that he had to go
through to learn everything thathe had to learn to get to that
point.
And you know, not everyonemakes it through the course and
not everyone makes it through um, what is that?
The prisoner of war camp that?
Speaker 1 (34:33):
you guys do.
Speaker 2 (34:34):
Oh my God, you know there are.
There's a lot of guys you knowwho don't make it like it's
really really daunting on likeyour mental state.
It's really daunting on youphysically.
You know I've watched him gainand lose so much weight you know
he went from 140 to or 240pounds to 210 pounds way too
(34:56):
fast.
So the what they have to endureand then you get to that point
and you did cross that line andyou, you made it to the finish
line and you got.
You got that it's the coolestthing to watch all of those guys
.
You know there was hundreds ofthem.
Speaker 1 (35:14):
And at the end when they graduated.
Speaker 2 (35:17):
You know you come over, you talk to the family.
So many of his fellow you knowarmy guys were coming over to me
and my family.
Your son got me through.
Your son got me through.
Your son is the reason I heldon as long as I did and that was
like probably even a more proudmoment that I'm like damn you.
You were really the strengthfor like all these other guys
(35:39):
and you carried them through.
That was just the guy that mybrother was.
Speaker 1 (35:43):
That's a true leader.
People understand the dynamic,that the course is long, and
it's whether you're a Bravo, 18,echo, 18, charlie, everybody
and Delta certainly are Deltas.
Everybody faces their trialsand tribulations and more often
(36:04):
than not it can just be a small,simple interaction with another
friend or even a student thatyou're not even close with.
But they provide some sort ofmoral support, whether it's a
look, whether it's anencouraging remark like hey,
keep going.
Sometimes you get your dickknocked into dirt, you fail
something, you stumble, youdon't meet a gate and you have
to redo something, and for a lotof people they just give up.
But there's great guys outthere.
(36:25):
I had them in my class whereall you, all you needed was, you
know, for example, teddy'sBritish accent telling you to
stop being a cunt, uh.
Or or one of your friends likeJason Jolly that just told you
to man up and keep going.
Those individuals are always inthe course, they're always
there, they're always around,even for that little sense of
(37:04):
like hey, you got this, keepgoing, you're not out of this
fight of leadership.
Growing up as a kid and incollege and then was actually
just masterfully like able toimplement that in his time as a
green beret.
Um, because, like I, like Isaid before, like when we were
talking and engaging, whensomebody reaches through online
(37:29):
and is able to communicate justhow amazing somebody was and how
important this new mission thattheir family's involved in, I
don't take that lightly.
And when his friend reached out, you could tell this person
meant something to him.
It was not like, hey, I needyou to help support this
nonprofit.
No, my brother, it's not eventalked through in the sense of a
(37:53):
past sense where we've lost him.
It's talking through like he'sstill with me and we need a
champion as cause.
Losing Tommy at such an earlyyou know, early age and I mean
he just started living life, hejust became a Green Beret, he
was just starting like, reallylike flourish in his new
profession that's heartbreaking.
(38:14):
That's a tough, tough thing todeal with for everybody, to
include teammates and family.
But how are you moving forward?
How are you dealing with ittoday, Having you know this
amazing giant new focal pointbeing the foundation you started
(38:34):
for him?
How are you grappling this loss?
Speaker 2 (38:38):
Um, you know, I literally have to take it day by
day.
It's really hard.
Um, um, oh sorry when I say hewas my best friend, he, like, he
was literally my person.
You know, he's the, you knowpeople coming in, out of your
lives.
You have your parents andeveryone, but, like your, your
(38:59):
sibling is that person that,like you have until the end.
You know, and to not have himhere is so painful.
Um, so, creating thisfoundation is literally the
thing that I'm like kind ofclinging to.
You know, it's, it's keepinghis legacy alive.
Um, and he has a son.
(39:20):
On the way they found out, um,the day before he passed what,
yeah, oh my gosh and so, youknow, creating a foundation
where we are showing the worldwho my brother was and doing
that is so important to mebecause I want this little boy
(39:40):
that he is about to have, um, toknow who his dad was, and I
want this kid to grow up knowingthat like he would have had the
best father in the world, and Icling to everything that I can
to make sure that this littleboy knows who, his who, what
kind of guy his dad was, um, andyou know this foundation is
(40:02):
something that, like he wouldhave done for one of his
brothers.
You know he would have wanted tostart something to keep the
legacy alive for one of hisbrothers and he loved helping
people, he loved being like thelight in someone else's life and
if that's something that I cando with this foundation for, you
(40:23):
know, someone underprivilegedand give them the opportunities
that my brother was able to, youknow, receive from my family,
that's, those are the thingsthat I'm like clinging to right
now.
That helped me, like getthrough each day.
Speaker 1 (40:35):
Yeah, no, lexi, I, you know, exploring your journey
and and also Tommy's, like I,can't help but realize just how
in in just perfect.
You know life unfolds.
You didn't take a standardapproach to life and you went
about, uh, your life after youknow, growing up as a kid and
(40:59):
instead of going to college, youstarted going into industry.
You started figuring out, youstarted making relationships,
making friendships, likeunderstanding pivotal aspects of
what it means to build abusiness, what it means to be
successful as an entrepreneur,whether you realize it or not,
like everything about yourjourney has shaped you to be
able to do this.
Reflect on that.
(41:19):
I think that you're missingthat aspect of it.
I think that God gave you aspecific path in life and
everything is coming intofruition right now the way it's
meant to be.
It's hard to see it as a giftright now.
It's hard to see the beauty inthis, but I am telling you after
hearing the way you approachedlife after high school.
(41:40):
Everything happened for areason.
You already know what it takesto put together a foundation.
It's networking, especially anonprofit where 90% of the time,
it's just meeting people,getting support, getting back
and getting financial supportand throwing events like raising
money and the other aspect.
It's intimately tied to whatmade Tommy arguably the best
(42:03):
version of himself, which wasmentorship, coaching, giving
opportunities and being able toprovide this world with more men
like Tommy.
Being able to give that tocommunities, that's a gift that
never dies, but yeah, it's.
I think, looking looking atyour journey, looking at Tommy's
journey, it's nothing'sguaranteed in life and that's
(42:26):
that's one thing that it's hardfor us to understand when we
deal with loss Like we can't.
We can't bring Tommy back.
We can't ask God to just pressrewind, but what we can do is
understand that everythinghappens for a reason and be
grateful for the gift that wehave for his legacy, because now
(42:47):
he has a boy on the way.
Speaker 2 (42:49):
Yeah.
Speaker 1 (42:49):
And that little guy is going to grow up with so many
stories of how amazing hisfather was and the impact that
he had, because, let me tell you, there's nothing greater than a
Red Empire family had, because,let me tell you, there's
nothing greater than a RedEmpire family and his teammates,
his friends, everybody that wastouched by him, is going to be
able to meet this young man whenhe gets of age and tell him
(43:10):
amazing stories of howremarkable his father was,
especially with this foundation.
Yeah absolutely so, as we wrapit up, tell us about this
foundation.
What's coming up?
We got a golf tournament comingup here pretty soon that I'm
stoked about.
We just started running the adson all of our podcasts, so
please tell us about theupcoming golf tournament.
Speaker 2 (43:30):
So the golf tournament will be June 28th, so
two weekends from now up inWyoming, michigan.
You know we chose to do thefirst fundraising event up in
Michigan, michigan.
You know we chose to do thefirst fundraising um event up in
Michigan just because you knowthat's where, that's where his
football career like really tookoff.
Um, his, he's got a hugecommunity up in Michigan and it
(43:51):
just kind of felt like theperfect place to have our first
um foundation like event,fundraising event.
Um.
So, like I said, it'll be up inWyoming Michigan, at the Pines
golf course.
Um, kickoff is going to be two,30.
So we'll be doing, you know,like cocktails, drinks and stuff
before.
It's going to be a party Likeit's going to be so much fun.
(44:12):
You know my brother is, like Isaid, he was a party boy.
He loved, he did, did not, hedid not let a beer get left
behind, you know.
So this, uh, this will be avery fun, fun um, I think it's a
foursome like a scramble, uh,but yeah, it's gonna be a very
fun event.
We're super excited.
(44:32):
There's gonna be raffle prizes,um, a couple different ways you
can get involved.
You can do, you know,sponsorship dinner, sponsorships
, if you want to, you know, joinus.
We've got about seven spotsleft in the tournament, you know
, so still trying to get thoseseats filled for the golf
tournament.
But yeah, we're super excited.
We're trying to raise about$30,000.
(44:53):
If we can do that, we can helpabout five kids, which is like
the goal.
I don't know if we reallytouched on, like, the basis of
the foundation, but the missionfor the foundation is to target
underprivileged high schoolfootball athletes who are just
kind of in a situation wherethey're not able to get the
(45:15):
mentorship, the collegescholarship, you know eyes on
them.
They're not able to, you know,pay for the skills training, the
camps, you know all that stuff.
So my goal is to target thosekids and put them through a camp
.
Put them through, you know, getthem a mentor, find out you
know what it is they need to getto get the skill level that
(45:35):
they need to, you know, bepicked up by high, by college
scholarships.
Um so if we can raise about$30,000, we can help five kids
and that is my goal for ourfirst year as a foundation is to
help at least five kids justkind of get to a closer place of
reaching their dreams, get themout of a bad situation.
Life is tough, we're not alwaysdealt a great hand, and if I
(46:01):
can do something to helpsomebody like these kids kind of
just get into a better positionfor life, like that's, that's
our main goal.
You know, building, buildingmore of my brother, more Tommy's
.
Speaker 1 (46:15):
Yeah, absolutely.
And it's important to remember,too, that mentorship and access
to these programs like it's notjust about making great NFL
players.
Making great college footballplayers, that's great, that's
the end result.
We want a lot of them to beable to reach their dreams, but
we're helping make great men,we're helping put more Tommies
(46:35):
out to the world, and that's agift that keeps on giving,
because we can make great menwhich will ultimately go out to
their local communities, makingtheir communities better, making
their areas better, being ableto become a force multiplier,
helping mentor and coach otherkids and that's what we need.
We're starting to lose that andwe need to bring that back.
It needs to be more popular,and one of the greatest ways
(46:57):
that we can mentor and coachkids is through sports, and if
we can give access to thoseunderprivileged areas and get
them into the the proper schoolswhere they can, they can thrive
, they can reach their goals.
Like, what better mission thanthat?
So, please, I'm asking all ofyou to pause right now.
Go to episode description orjust scan this qr code right
there and you will be taken tothe website for the first annual
(47:20):
golf tournament for the TommyLazaro Foundation.
Please support them.
There's still opportunities tobecome a sponsor, so jump on
them.
It's important that we diveinto this and help support it.
Look, I know you have $100, $200to spare.
You're in the military.
I know what you make.
I know what you spend yourmoney on.
Stop subscribing to OnlyFansand start promoting and
(47:43):
supporting these nonprofits.
Damn it, you can afford it.
I've seen what you make.
Lexi, thank you so much forbeing here.
It's absolute pleasure toconnect with you.
I'm excited to see this thinggrow and get bigger.
I can't wait for you to have anevent in Florida, I mean Destin
.
It's what better fitting placeto have a golf tournament?
We've got a couple of golfcourses out there, some good
(48:04):
ones.
Speaker 2 (48:05):
Yes.
Speaker 1 (48:05):
Um, there's, there's.
No, it's not a Pinehurst, butuh, I think Destin areas is uh
growing and booming and maybe wecan beach hangout a crab Island
.
That'd be perfect.
Speaker 2 (48:17):
That would be.
That's an idea.
That's an idea right there.
Yes, We'll definitely be doingmore um throughout the year,
more fundraising events.
We'll definitely be doingsomething in Florida.
Um, so TBD on that, Heck, yeah.
Speaker 1 (48:31):
Yeah, awesome.
Thank you so much for beinghere and everybody tuning in.
Thank you guys for being hereand supporting Uh.
I appreciate you all so verymuch.
We are uh kicking ass andappreciate you all so very much.
We are kicking ass and ifyou're following us on Instagram
, you know go ahead and give usa like, share, a follow on there
too.
Really appreciate it.
Thank you for tuning in.
We'll see you all next time.
Until then, take care.
(48:53):
Thanks for tuning in and don'tforget to like, follow, share,
subscribe and review us on yourfavorite podcast platform.
If you want to support us, headon over to buymeacoffeecom
forward slash SecHawk podcastand buy us a coffee.
Connect with us on Instagram Xor TikTok and share your
thoughts or questions abouttoday's episode.
You can also visitsecurityhawkcom for exclusive
(49:13):
content, resources and updates.
And remember, we get throughthis together.
If you're still listening, theepisode's over.
Yeah, there's no more Tune intomorrow or next week.
Thank you.
Popular Podcasts
Bookmarked by Reese's Book Club
Welcome to Bookmarked by Reese’s Book Club — the podcast where great stories, bold women, and irresistible conversations collide! Hosted by award-winning journalist Danielle Robay, each week new episodes balance thoughtful literary insight with the fervor of buzzy book trends, pop culture and more. Bookmarked brings together celebrities, tastemakers, influencers and authors from Reese's Book Club and beyond to share stories that transcend the page. Pull up a chair. You’re not just listening — you’re part of the conversation.
On Purpose with Jay Shetty
I’m Jay Shetty host of On Purpose the worlds #1 Mental Health podcast and I’m so grateful you found us. I started this podcast 5 years ago to invite you into conversations and workshops that are designed to help make you happier, healthier and more healed. I believe that when you (yes you) feel seen, heard and understood you’re able to deal with relationship struggles, work challenges and life’s ups and downs with more ease and grace. I interview experts, celebrities, thought leaders and athletes so that we can grow our mindset, build better habits and uncover a side of them we’ve never seen before. New episodes every Monday and Friday. Your support means the world to me and I don’t take it for granted — click the follow button and leave a review to help us spread the love with On Purpose. I can’t wait for you to listen to your first or 500th episode!
Dateline NBC
Current and classic episodes, featuring compelling true-crime mysteries, powerful documentaries and in-depth investigations. Follow now to get the latest episodes of Dateline NBC completely free, or subscribe to Dateline Premium for ad-free listening and exclusive bonus content: DatelinePremium.com